#The E(gg) Team

[solosart]

10-year-old me: That is a dumb idea for a video game 10-year-old me: 10-year-old me: 10-year-old me: 10-year-old me: *begs my mom to take me to Blockbuster*

[jrueships]

his little superman after saving metropolis pose while looking around all happy & proud at the beginning 😭 he doesn't even know he might be in hot water for basically saying doc rivers' is the reason why the grizz won

[cinnamostar]

colors of you

pairing : felix x gn!reader

summary : skz, semi pro league of legends team, now has a new competitor to face in the scene in the upcoming regional tournament, but after a few practice matches, felix knew he hated you and thought you were a complete asshole.

wc : 5.8k

cw : not proofread (i am lazy), collegiate esports au, very competitive rivalry on one end, unrequited love, enemies to a secret third thing i won't disclose, cursing, some angst, sadness, fluffy feelings, and y/tn = your team name + y/ign = your ingame name/username.

a/n : this fic was inspired by league of legends worlds 2023, except not as hardcore. i didn't write tooo much on the gameplay so anyone who didn't play league would also be able to enjoy and follow the story well. likes, reblogs, and feedback is appreciated as always

⌲ SKZ - semi-pro league of legends team

member profile

⌲ channie - in game leader, mid laner, azir + zed main

⌲ dwaekki - adc, caitlyn main

⌲ hyune - supp, pretty girl supp main (everyone has to beg him to play anything else)

⌲ miniverse - top laner, sett main

⌲ sunlixie - jungler, diana main 

* currently undefeated in collegiate regional cup, three year streak

⌲ Y/TN - up and coming semi-pro team

member profile

⌲ y/ign - in game leader, jungler, briar + kindred main

⌲ nyangknow - adc, kaisa + jinx main

⌲ jone - mid laner, ahri main

⌲ bibibread - supp, renata + rell main

⌲ some guy - top laner, yone + aatrox main **

* has won smaller level tournaments, gained entry to collegiate regional cup through these wins

**(a/n: some guy is literally some guy lmao sorry i did not feel like adding some random idol to the story)

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Felix clenched his jaw as flames of anger flickered within him, the obnoxious, classic, yet familiar, league of legends red defeat screen only fanning the resentment that burned hot through his veins. He ripped his headset off as he swallowed down the third bitter loss his team faced that day, his face glaring down at your username that seemed to mock him in every post-game lobby chat. 

y/ign: GG! Thanks for the skrims :) Same time tomorrow?

He rolled his eyes at your message, trusting Chan to coordinate with your team for the next matches as he closed out the client while reaching for his headset once more, letting out an exasperated groan. 

“Well… that went as well as it did last time, huh?” Chan’s lighthearted laugh rang through Felix’s ear which only irritated him more, unsure how he was able to remain so positive after three soul crushing defeats. “Overall, their team is really solid and versatile. I can see why they’ve been dominating the lower tier teams and why they’re in our division now, but those games definitely helped us understand the skill of each of their players and what champs we need to ban.”

Changbin hummed in agreement gloomily, “Man, I don’t wanna play against them more, that y/ign guy is fucking annoying to play against. I can’t even farm properly without them ganking my lane every few minutes.”

Felix scoffed, “Yeah, imagine being counterpicked by them and having them take your jungle camps every game,” frustration colored each of Felix’s word a bright and gaudy crimson as he spoke through gritted teeth, taking a swig of water hoping it would somehow cool down the unbearable rage he felt bubbling inside him.

“I’m sorry, man, I know those games were especially rough on you,” Chan mumbled apologetically, carefully choosing his words to avoid hitting a nerve, “But we now know what champs to ban for them, we know to ward your camps early game, and to change our approach.”

“Yeah, I guess we can try out a more dive heavy comps and try to get early picks so they can’t shut us out of the game so quickly,” Seungmin suggested with uncertainty as he weighed the options his team now had, “Or more tanky… Maybe we need more CC?”

“Ah, well, it’s hard to say because god knows what other champs they can play. Each game they had an entirely different comp, so I guess we can try to prepare for every scenario we have seen so far, but we will still have to stay wary during the champ select process,” muttered Chan as he reflected today’s matches, trying to formulate a game plan for the team, “All good though, let’s just rest up for today. Skrims at the same time tomorrow, but log on an hour before so we can review our vods and discuss what we wanna try out in our games, alright?”

With that, the team grumbled a disheartened goodbye as Felix exited the call, once more tossing his headset in annoyance while he rubbed his face, clicking his teeth as he replayed each death from today’s games and how it was always you flashing your mastery after each kill. 

Felix had no idea who you were, but your team had randomly emerged into the scene these past few months, quickly making themselves a well-respected and feared team as you dominated the lower tiered scene which now meant SKZ, a team well known within the semi-pro scene had no choice, but to take your team as a serious threat. Chan had reached out to you via discord, asking if your team was interested in a few practice sessions against his, which leads us to today.

There was no mistaking that your team was extremely well-versed and had done their research against SKZ, promptly banning each of their signature mains during the champ select process while picking characters that were either, quite frankly, annoying to deal with or countered their own. Felix should have known it was a bad omen when your team banned Chan’s Azir and Changbin’s Caitlyn, but once he saw you pick Briar against his own Diana, he knew he was in for a rough day.

You were perhaps the most annoying person Felix has ever had the misfortune to go against, somehow knowing just how to piss him off as you counter jungled him throughout the game and took every opportunity to gank his teammates, ultimately ruining their chances to catch up to your team’s gold. You even stole Baron from them, which ended up costing them the second game after your team immediately wiped his. He was filled with vengeful rage each time he saw your character on the screen, cursing internally whenever you made a good play, not even giving him the chance to trash you because you seemed to never make a mistake.

After today, Felix knew he hated you with all his being and made it his personal mission to give you a taste of your own medicine, swearing up and down that he would make sure that any games he played against you were absolute hell. He had a month to prepare for the next LAN tournament, where he would embarrass you on stage and disgrace the newly-founded prestige your team name had earned this past year. y/ign would no longer be the latest jungler breaking into the scene, you’d no longer be the new talent to keep an eye out. He wanted to make sure you were nothing but an utter disappointment to everyone who looked forward to your next performance.

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When the next day came, Felix was brimming with confidence after spending last night researching your team, but with extra attention focused on you and your playstyle. Felix looked through your team's past matches and if he was lucky enough to find an old broadcast of the games, he’d scrub through them to gain a better understanding of your jungle pathing and how it differed by each character you played. Today, he refused to be caught off guard by your skill and would not give you the chance to gain as much map control as you did yesterday. 

When logging onto his PC, Felix noticed a notification on his discord:

✩ y/ign sent you a friend request!

hey! wanted to thank you for the games yesterday and look forward to playing you guys again today :) 

While you probably had the best intentions in mind, Felix immediately felt the scorching, yet thrilling, heat of competitiveness settle into his body as he scowled at your message. “Fucking asshole,” he mumbled under his breath in disbelief, assuming you sent that as a way to get under his skin before today’s skrims. 

sunlixie accepted y/ign’s friend request! 

sunlixie reacted to y/ign’s message with a thumbs up!

Great, not only are you extremely talented at the game, but turns out you’re an incredibly cocky person! Anything Felix had ever learned about you, aside from his research last night, was completely against his will and it was only making him despise you even more. He hated how easily you ticked him off, how easily you filled him with unbridled rage by doing the absolute bare minimum, and he hated how sour the taste of anger was. He hated this feeling, as it always ended up clouding his perception and made him an absolute hellish person to be around, but it was also one of the most driving forces behind his competitive nature. 

Despite his huffing and puffing, Felix decided to close his eyes for a brief moment, as if he was meditating away all the negative emotions you so effortlessly planted within him with a simple message. After taking in a deep breath, Felix joined the discord call with the rest of his team, greeting them with a cheery ‘hello!’

“Felix! You sleep well? Sounds like you’re feeling better from yesterday,” asked Chan, the smile in his tone was impossible to miss.

Felix nodded before responding with a “Yup, got my eight hours and feeling a little more confident after some research.” 

“Good, good, that’s what I like to hear.”

Before Chan could continue with their pre-match meeting, Hyunjin piped up a question, “Did anyone else get a message from y/ign?”

Just hearing your username was enough for Felix’s entire mood to deflate as he sunk into his chair with furrowed eyebrows. He was about to open his mouth to tell everyone how rude you just are, but to his surprise, Changbin beat him to it, “Dude!! They are so nice!” a giggle escaped Changbin as he recalled the message, “They said my Draven was pretty good and that Hyunjin’s Lux had their bot lane nervous!”

Now that was not what Felix was expecting to hear from anyone as his jaw dropped, completely shocked to hear just how sweet your messages were to everyone else and how downright rude yours was to him. What the hell is your problem? Felix hadn’t realized how tight he was gripping his mouse til he felt the plastic material slip from under his fingers, landing on desk due to all the force applied.

“Right! It’s nice to know we had them sweating even though they looked so composed,” Hyunjin eagerly added.

“They’re super kind and humble, which is refreshing to see in this scene,” laughed Chan, “Maybe I gotta play a little better today to get my own compliment, but they did thank us for playing against them and for agreeing to not post the vods. What about you Felix? They say anything to you?”

Felix was still recovering from shock after processing the information he just learned, stammering in both surprise and upsetness, “Dude… I… I don’t know what to say because they were a straight up asshole to me.”

“What?! No way!” gasped Changbin, “Maybe it’s because you’re their match up in the game, but that doesn;t sound right…”

“Yeah, that’s weird,” Seungmin added, “What did they say?”

Felix then pulled up the message you sent, reading it out for the rest of his team to hear, adding an annoyed “Can you believe the nerve of this guy?” 

.

.

.

A few moments had passed by where no one had said anything, the call remained dead silent as everyone tried to figure out how to gently inform Felix that he was being an idiot and turning a very friendly message from you into an ill-intended one.

Chan cleared his throat, holding back a laugh as he realized your performance yesterday really struck something in Felix, “Bro, I hate to break it to you, but that was definitely a nice message… I don’t really see where they’re being rude at all.”

This time, it was Felix’s turn to stay quiet, a perplexed look overtaking his features after hearing the rest of his teammates agree with Chan. Maybe if he squinted really, really hard he’d be able to find a hint of kindness in your message, but Felix had already convinced himself you were his ultimate rival who was trying to throw him off a game. There is no way you’d ever send him a nice message just because, right? 

“Well, I don’t know… Maybe you guys are right,” mumbled Felix, not completely convinced by his friends, which prompted Hyunjin to chuckle.

“Lixie, I have never seen someone get to you so easily before! Those games yesterday must’ve done a number on ya, huh?” 

Felix rolled his eyes as he let out a peeved exhale through his nose, unable to deny any of what Hyunjin had said, “Yeah, yesterday was rough, but surely today will be different, yea?”

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Luckily for the SKZ boys, today was different from the day before. This time, the boys were able to secure a win in the first game, while the second game was a very close loss due to Changbin being caught out, but this just called for better positioning and map vision, all things that could be easily resolved by being more mindful. 

Despite the major improvements in the SKZ team’s gameplay, your performance did not fall short from yesterday’s as you still managed to be a threat SKZ couldn’t ignore. Although Felix was able to maintain control of his side of the map and trade some camps with you, you were still able to fill him with rage by somehow targeting him every fight, which made it nearly impossible for him to play the game. Luckily, Seungmin ended up using his Mordekaiser ultimate on you, which gave SKZ a chance to focus on the rest of your team while Seungmin did his best to tank your damage in his realm. This strategy definitely led them to their first win against your team, but as soon as the second match started, your team switched up to an entirely new comp, which SKZ struggled to answer.

Unfortunately, your team wasn’t able to stick around for a third game due to some prior commitments, so there was no decisive winner for the day.

y/ign: GGs! sunlixie, you really were sweating today on that diana jg kek

nyangknow: if i ever see you irl, its on sight, sunlixie… targeting a poor lil adc like me? 

nyangknow: lol but gg! y/ign slammed their desk when u stole elder last game kek

y/ign: shut up before i expose ur government name

nyangknow: …

channie: haha, sunlixie wasn’t gonna let u guys embarrass us again 

channie: GG! dm me on disc if you guys wanna set up some more skrims 

dwaekki: :3 gg!!! u guys did great, heh ty for games!

Once again, Felix found himself frowning at your message in the post-game lobby, irritation bubbling up in the pit of his stomach as his knuckles turned white from clenched fists. “Dude, I don’t get what their problem is with me,” whined Felix as he closed out the client once more, not even bothering to send a message in the chat.

Seungmin snickered over the mic, finding Felix’s one-sided rivalry hilarious, “That was definitely a compliment, don’t take it the wrong way.”

“Whatever,” he mumbled snarkily at Seungmin’s response, not being able to find any of the validity in his comments, “Just felt like they were poking fun at me.”

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The weekend of the Regional Collegiate LAN tournament had finally arrived, and luckily for SKZ, they didn’t have to worry about traveling since their university was hosting the event. This event did hold some importance, but it mostly helped determine seeding for the next tournament with only a few teams at risk for elimination. Due to SKZ’s skill level, elimination was the least of their concern with them being favored to win first place. First place did receive a cash prize to help cover travel costs to nationals, but it also helped any team gain more support and made the pro scene more aware of potential candidates for their team. 

SKZ was getting set to prepare for their first match of the weekend, but had some time to kill so they settled on roaming around the venue to catch up with some friends from other teams and greet any fans that approached them. In this world, it wasn’t uncommon for any of the more popular teams to have fans, as some people were either fans of individual players, their skills, or they were a fan of the entire team. 

Today was no different as Felix walked through the venue on his own, chatting with friends from other teams and meeting any new recruits while he was at it. Frustratingly enough though, your team and you had been quite the topic amongst his friends, each of them expressing concern at how intimidating and difficult your team seemed. Everyone in the scene knew that SKZ and Y/TN had gone against each other in a few practice matches, meaning everyone was swarming to them like flies, trying to extract as much information as they could against your team. Although, you and SKZ had an agreement to not leak out any team comps or skrim information before playing, so Felix had to deal with a whole lot of begging while trying to skirt around the subject.

Felix had finally gotten a moment of peace as he excused himself from the last interrogation, deciding it was time to group up with the team seeing that their match was in about an hour from now. Before he was able to get far, he heard a voice behind him call out:

“Yo! Sunlixie, is that you?”

Well, he was wearing a jersey with his name on the back of it, so it wasn’t weird for fan interactions to go this way. He put a smile on his face and turned to greet the owner of the voice, who he honestly thought was a little too cute to be wandering around the convention center on their own, but nonetheless he pushed the thought away and decided it was best to maintain a level of professionality when interacting with fans. 

“Hi! Yup, that would be me!”

The mystery person had a smile stretching across their face reaching out to shake Felix’s hand, which he took politely. He had no idea who this person was and it didn’t look like they were part of any teams since they weren’t wearing a jersey, so it was safe to assume this was just another fan.

“Wow, it’s so great to finally meet you! I’m y/ign, or you can just call me Y/N if you prefer.”

Felix eyes widened in pure surprise when your username left your mouth, not expecting the human he was talking to was you of all people. He did his absolute best to maintain his composure, but the sound of your name dampened his mood in the blink of an eye, his shoulders visibly tensing as his smile fell into a more awkward version of it. 

“Oh, sorry! You aren’t wearing your jersey, so I didn’t realize it was you,” he forced an uncomfortable laugh, but you had already picked up on the stiffness Felix was now carrying in his shoulders, “But, uh, you can call me Felix.”

Ever since you became acquainted with SKZ through your skrims, you could tell that Felix definitely wasn’t your biggest fan. Maybe you had gotten off on the wrong foot, but other than playing the game, you weren’t sure what you had done to make him dislike you so much. You had quickly befriended everyone else on the SKZ teams, even going as far as playing other games outside of league with them or meeting up with them to get food, but Felix was the only member who was uninterested and incredibly dry towards you. 

You had done your best to reach out to him and try to get to know him a little better, thinking maybe he just needed time to warm up to strangers, but that theory was quickly disproved when you found out Jeongin and Jisung had played some ARAMs with him and even met him in real life. Apparently, he was the sweetest and most pleasant guy to be around, yet you never had the pleasure to be met with his warmth. Instead, all you knew was an icy and cold exterior that pushed you away at every corner. At some point, you had been discouraged to attempt to be his friend, but you still thought it would be best to remain as cordial as you could with him, which meant greeting him and inviting him to any events your team hosted.

Not everyone was going to like you, that was a lesson you had learned long ago and you weren’t going to let it get to you when you had other things to focus on. You didn’t need to be his friend, anyway. 

“Yeah, my team isn’t scheduled to play til way later, so didn’t really need to wear it,” you smiled at the boy, nervously playing with the hem of your shirt as you watched Felix’s expression slowly drop, “Well, uh, I’ll let you go back to your team. Good luck in your games!”

Felix raised an eyebrow as you hastily turned away, surprised at how different your demeanor was in person compared to his initial impression of you. 

Online and through your varied interactions, Felix had pinned you as some overconfident, cocky, and disrespectful asshole who was purposefully targeting him. While everyone around him insisted that was not the case, he couldn’t help but feel the burning flames of hatred burst in him every time he received a message from you, each seemingly mocking him for whatever play he made that day. 

However, this version of you was entirely different than what he had imagined this whole time. You didn’t ooze out that same confidence he had pictured you to have, but instead you seemed a lot more timid and welcoming in person. There was a gentle shyness that accompanied the warmth of your aura, golden and bright hues of yellow radiating off you as you smiled with not a single hint of malice in your eyes. When he met your gaze, he thought he would be staring right into the same sweltering, scarlet fury he had become so familiar with, but while searching your eyes, all he found was the brilliance of your tender-hearted benevolence, only rays of sunshine and light coloring the bright green meadows that expanded across your being.

What was this? This wasn’t the scorching, volcanic, blindingly red world he had been living in the past month, yet he still found himself melting under the comforting warmth, wanting nothing more to bask in your glow and forget the blistering one-sided rivalry he had imagined. For a moment of time, he felt the amber light you emanated was slowly turning his ugly red into a more placid orange, one akin to the sky’s palette during sunset. 

Maybe the boys were right, maybe you did mean well. Maybe he was the asshole, not you.

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The crowd cheered loudly as the announcer’s voice boomed over the intercom, officially declaring SKZ as the victors of the regional collegiate cup for the fourth year in the row. As soon as the blue victory screen popped up during their 5th game against Y/TN, the boys quickly stood up from their seats as they huddled into a group hug while gleefully jumping up and down, ecstatic screams and laughter leaving them as they celebrated their win. After an intense final match where SKZ and Y/TN had traded wins, in the very last game, SKZ was able to pull out with the third and final win needed to end the tournament. That was perhaps one of the most difficult finals SKZ had to play in a long time and for the first time in years, they were afraid that their reign was coming to an end, but luck was on their side today and all the skirms against your team had come to fruition. 

Across the stage, your team stood amongst the chaos erupting throughout the venue, you remaining still in your seat as you watched the defeat screen go through its animations, tears pricking the corner of your eyes in humiliation. Second place was nothing to be ashamed of, but you couldn’t stop the overwhelming rush of emotions that filled you, the blinding stage lights causing your vision to go blurry as the feeling of failure took hold of you. You enviously watched SKZ celebrate their win as you wiped away your tears, standing from your seat with the rest of your team as you headed to congratulate the opposing team.

As your team approached SKZ, Felix immediately noticed the shift in your emotions and saw through the fake smile you forced onto your face as you congratulated each of them. All he could see was the bleak tears that clouded the brightness that once occupied you, the golden aura of yours being overtaken by the blues of sorrow and disappointment. The sun that once gleamed through your entire being had been replaced by flooding waters from a relentless storm of emotion, the cerulean raindrops overtaking the shining yellow hues of your personality. 

As the colors of your emotions blended, Felix swore he saw the slightest tinge of an ugly green forming as the two aforementioned colors danced with one another. Was that jealousy? Although, as soon as he took note of it, the color instantly melted away as you shook his hand, a sincere ‘congratulations, you did amazing,’ leaving your mouth despite the tumultuous storm that dampened your conscience. Somehow, even as the bitter taste of failure lingered on your tongue, your genuinity never once faltered.

The vengeful, piercing, crimson rage Felix had felt for you weeks prior had dulled out as your sadness bleed all over him, guilt now washing over him as he had realized how sorely mistaken he was about you. The burning competitiveness and hatred that once fueled him had been put out by your misery, a deep violet now painting over him as the heavy hands of culpability dragged him down into numbing darkness of shame.

For some unknown reason, Felix felt the urge to run after you as he watched your figure shrink off the stage, wanting to apologize for his unwarranted attitude towards you this past month and bring you back to the warmness he had just learned about to revel under it once more. He remained unmoving as his teammates dragged him into another celebration hug, insisting to take a photo to remember this moment, yet Felix wanted nothing more to forget the sight he had just witnessed. Even though his wish had come true, he couldn’t bring himself to savor this victory against you.

･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ ✩ ･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ ✩ ･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ ✩ ･

A few days had gone by since your team had lost the tournament, suffering from what you had considered a rather embarrassing loss. While the games were incredibly close, you were sorely disappointed in your own performance, as you felt that you made too many mistakes that had cost your team the game. After walking off the stage, you succumbed to all the emotions you felt in that moment, letting your body tremble as tears rushed down your cheeks, choked sobs escaping your mouth. You remember how hot your face grew as the rest of your team turned to console you, feeling self-conscious how you were supposed to be the leader, yet you allowed your emotions to get the best of you. 

Despite that, you had managed to get over the brunt of your emotions after a few days, but the message you found waiting for you today on discord had taken you by complete surprise:

✩ sunlixie sent you a message!

hi y/n! i wanted to reach out and apologize to you for how rude i’ve been to you. i’m really sorry, there’s no excuse for any of it. to be honest, i kinda just got rlly tilted from when we played our first skrims, and i guess i ended up taking anything you said the wrong way. again, there’s no excuse for this and i apologize for being that way, but i’d like to have a fresh start and be friends if you are ok w that!

oh, also, you did really great during the tournament! don’t beat yourself up for it, that was the first time we had to play all five games out in the finals, so you guys had us nervous!! 

Well, that was entirely unexpected, but as soon as you read the message, a smile broke out on your face while letting out a sigh of relief, happy to know that it had all been a rather strange misunderstanding and not something you had done. With that, you hastily wrote out a response to Felix, letting him know that all is forgiven and that you would love to be able to finally form a friendship with him. Well, maybe something good did come out of this loss.

･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ ✩ ･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ ✩ ･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ ✩ ･

After playing a few league games with Felix, you both began to develop a close friendship with each other. You finally began to understand what everyone else meant when they described Felix, you were beginning to see why his username was sunlixie. The coldness you had come to know him as melted away as the days past, only to reveal that under that hardened exterior was a boy filled with so much love and gentleness, that it’d blind anyone who stared into his soul for too long. The deep tone of his voice only added to this inviting warmth, adding a layer of comfort and safety that could lull anyone in a peaceful sleep, it was no longer a scary sound that reeked with hatred. 

Eventually, you and Felix had decided to go on small outings together, usually opting to grab a bite at your local coffee shop as either of you would ramble on about a new game to try out or discuss practice for nationals. On the occasion, one of the SKZ boys would tag along or Minho, a member on your team, would join you both, but every time this happened, Felix always felt disappointed that he would miss out time with just you alone. 

Truthfully, he wanted you to himself during these rare moments, wanting to be the only one who made you laugh and be the center of your attention. Jealousy would inevitably creep up behind him, pointing out each and everyone of his insecurities while he watched you interact with the others, it whispering in his ears that you’d never look at someone like him romantically, that he’d never have a chance with someone like you. He hated how much time he had missed out on getting to know you and being your friend due to this childish rivalry, feeling jealous over how much closer you were with everyone else, especially Minho.

Of course your bond with Minho was deeper than everyone else, you had known him longer than Felix and the other SKZ boys and were teammates. Yet, the pangs of insecurity would hit his heart directly each time he’d watch you laugh at a joke Minho made, always playfully slapping his arm in a fit of laughter. 

All Felix could ever think was how much he had wished that was him, how much he wished he’d be able to make you laugh to the point of tears as the unpleasant color of green slowly festered within him, becoming more vibrant as time passed. He was crushing hard on you and he needed to do something about it before it became unbearable to deal with because he hated the unsettling feeling of jealousy.

Thus, Felix decided to finally bite the bullet and asked you to come out for some coffee today, but letting you know he needed to talk about something personal, so he’d prefer if you came alone. 

As you approached the coffee shop, you wondered what Felix could have possibly needed to discuss with you, but you were honored to know that he felt comfortable enough to reach out to you and confide in you with something so personal, which only goes to show how much closer you two have gotten. Upon entering the building, your eyes searched for Felix, finding him seated in a more secluded corner with two coffees waiting on the table. Once his eyes met yours, you waved from the entrance with a smile on your face as you skipped over to the table.

Sliding into your seat, you caught onto Felix’s jittery energy as his legs bounced while his fingers anxiously tapped against the table. His body stiffened as he met your eyes with a nervous smile. Your eyebrows furrowed upward in concern, as you never seen the boy in this state before.

“Hey, is everything okay?”

Felix’s eyes widened at your question, his body completely stilling, not completely aware of how on edge he looked from the outside. He felt a familiar warmth rush to his face as a gentle pink dusted across his cheeks and ears, the rosy color of shyness making itself nestling itself in his stomach. The buzzing flutters he had felt in his stomach earlier sped up with the drumming of his heart, his head feeling like it was about to explode as he scrambled to find the script he rehearsed last night.

“Uhm, yeah, everything’s okay. I just wanted to talk to you about something,” his voice trembled meekly, cringing at the sound of his voice.

You nodded at his words, a panicked look overtaking your face, “Oh, no, did I do something wrong? Did I upset you?”

The blonde haired boy shook his head vigorously, finding your worriedness a bit charming, “Ah, no, not at all! It’s nothing like that!”

The tension in your body dissipated, as a caring smile returned to your face, “Oh, okay. Thank god, I was scared for a bit. Then what’s up? What did you need to talk about?”

“Well, I don’t really know how to say this…” he mumbled quietly, but just loud enough for you to hear. He felt himself shrink under the intensity of your gaze, surprised to see an overwhelming amount of concern etched on your features. 

“That’s okay. Sometimes, you just gotta say it.”

He exhaled nervously, nodding in agreement with your words because he was freaking out on the inside, unable to recall any of the words he had prepared for this moment. Right, at this point, he should just say it.

“I… I like you, Y/N. I really, really like you and-”

Oh, that isn’t the reaction he thought he’d get.

You were never good at hiding your facial expressions, and this moment was no exception as your face morphed into a surprise expression, your mouth dropping as the words left Felix as the warmth you once held paled into white cast of shock and confusion. As soon as you processed his words, you bit your lips while trying to find the words to respond to the sudden confession.

“Ah, wow, thank you, I’m really flattered, but…” you paused for a moment, confusion and uncertainty laced in your voice, “you do know I’m dating Minho, right?”

[xandraspalace]

GG, Babe!

----- GG, Babe! || Shu Yamino [NIJISANJI EN] x Streamer/Gamer! Reader

Summary : It’s not uncommon to feel pressured and nervous in your first esports tournament, especially if you carry the name of your company’s branch. How do you deal with your anxiousness in this moment of time? You have to thank your lover and your team.

WC : 4198 words.

Warning : Grammar errors, hurt w/ comfort, teeth-rotting fluff (possible cringes?), cursing, possible misconceptions, possible ooc, hints of insecurities if you squint, KanaChiiKuzu references, mention of many Valorant terms, mention of making out (mention only), etc.

Featured Characters : Finana Ryugu, Elira Pandora, Selen Tatsuki, Rosemi Lovelock, Vox Akuma, Uki Violeta, and Fulgur Ovid.

Story Notes : This story is written with first-person point of view and the reader is gender-neutral. The personas written here are based on the avatar of the characters as vtubers, not the person behind it. Enjoy.

A/N : FINALLY I CAN ACTIVELY WRITE ON THIS ACCOUNT!!! I will try to be more active this year. Mostly for writing birthday fiction and other specific projects. I hope you guys can continue to support me. Enjoy!

Other Platform : [TWITTER] [MEDIUM]

     “Oh, hell. That was close,” Selen sighed.

     After winning the match in a very miserable condition. 2v4, if it weren’t for Shu and Selen, your team wouldn’t be able to secure a place in the semi-finals.

     “NIJISANJI EN” registered his name in a virtual e-sport tournament with a team consisting of Finana Ryugu, Selen Tatsuki, Rosemi Lovelock, Shu Yamino, Uki Violeta, and you, NIJISANJI EN solo liver. Five rosters and one substitute, with Fulgur as the team coach and Elira as the team manager — just a formality.

     Everyone breathed a sigh of relief and drooped their stiff shoulders, realizing how tense they had been during the games.

     Except you. Your right hand still gripped your mouse tightly until your nails turn white and your left hand fell limp beside the keyboard.

     There are many things you regret. Even if your team wins, it wasn’t a very good game for you. And as a player who has died too many times in the previous round, you have to admit that your gameplay was very sloppy and rushed.

     To be honest, you were annoyed at yourself for putting your team at a disadvantage. You wanted to cry, you felt pathetic. But in less than half an hour, you have to play for the last round of the quarter-finals.

     “Ah, I should have backed off,” Rosemi whined, slightly disappointed by what she did in the game before her agent died.

     “Uki, try not to be locked in the room,” Selen said, advising the psychic.

     Fulgur added, “Also, don’t rush.”

     “Noted,” Uki answered.

     “They actually messed up with the flash, especially the one who used Yoru.” Finana, who had been paying attention to the opponent as a substitute player, also commented.

     “She’s your senior, Finana! Mind your words!” Elira laughed when she reminded Finana, who apparently had just commented on her senior who was also a quite famous vtuber.

     “Oh, wait! Really?! Senpai, I’m sorry!!” The panicked Finana managed to make the whole team laugh out loud.

     “I guess Shu saved us then,” Rosemi chuckled after drinking her water.

     But Shu could only giggle, “Don’t give me too much credit, guys.”

     Waiting for the next game, the others decide to chat with each other while strategizing the gameplay for the next and final round of quarter-finals. Occasionally, they also greet their chats while joking. However, Shu realized something was wrong, especially with you.

     It’s like your mic was muted, but he could still hear your breathing. Shu glanced at the phone he was using to watch and monitor your stream and somehow noticed how your chat were being flooded with concerned comments.

     How were they not worried? Your avatar was still moving, but you were silent. Your fans started to send some “Are you okay?”s or “Earth to [Y/N]?”s chats, etc.

     “[Y/N]?”

     Hearing Shu called you in a worried tone, the entire voice chat fell silent.

     “Babe, are you still there?” Once again, Shu Yamino, your lover, asked in a worried tone.

     “W-what’s wrong?” Selen broke the silence.

     The chat of each liver was immediately filled with worried comments. Some of the chats, especially Shu’s chat, said something like, “Shu, go comfort your darling!” etc.

     You and Shu were actually just room apart. There was only one wall separating your studio and his. Therefore, if something happened, he could immediately rush over to you.

     Others chose silence. If they show their concern, they will only make their fans worry too. But suddenly…

     “[Y/N], I could hear your hitched breathes,” Shu said, ready to pause his stream.

     “Aww, they’re crying,” Selen cooed. “[Y/N], are you alright?”

     You tried to swallow your sobs. “I-I’m fine.” And you failed instantly.

     Finana, Selen, and Elira bursted out laughing, not to offend you, but because of how cute you sounded when you were crying and trying hard to speak.

     “My, my, [Y/N],” Fulgur chuckled in amusement. “What’s wrong? You’re upset because of the game?” Fulgur, with his coach title, also tried to comfort you and find where things were wrong with you.

     “I’m sorry for ruining the mood,” you sniffed, apologizing to the others and the chat.

     Your team immediately cried their nos and tried to make you feel better by praising your gameplay. They said that everything that happened in the previous rounds wasn’t not your fault at all. Your chat and the others’ also comfort you.

     “It’s okay, [Y/N]. You looked so cool earlier! Your aim was so crazy!” Rosemi tried to cheer you up.

     “But that was not too long since the game started.” You still feelt guilty.

     “No, no, no. [Y/N], it’s fine,” Selen declined your insecurities. “If you didn’t support me at the beginning, we might be done because it will stay a 2v5 game till the end.”

     “You’re telling me Rosemi and Uki will still die?!” Finana, who didn’t accept it, suddenly raised her voice when she heard Selen’s explanation.

     “WAIT, THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT!” Selen screamed, making everyone laugh out loud. You started to giggle even though with sobs that can still be heard.

     “Chat, please cheer on [Y/N].” In the middle of chaos, with his calm voice, Uki told his chat to give you some words to make you feel better.

     “Guys, and chat, I’ll be mute for a moment. I need to check on them.” Shu asked permission from the others.

     “Y-you don’t have to. I’m fine now,” you mumbled, wiping your remaining tears.

     Trust me when I say Shu won’t believe you. He is your lover, so he will understand all the emotions you put out even just from your voice. “Nah-uh, I’ll go get some water for us too. I’ll be there in a second, wait for a bit.”

     Shu removed his headset and stood up. But before he left his studio, Shu approached his mic again. “Oh, and to [Y/N]’s chat, if [Y/N] suddenly goes mute, or their stream suddenly pauses or stops, that’s me. You don’t need to worry.”

     “I can mute myself!” you half-yelled at your boyfriend, making everyone giggle.

     “Just go and comfort her, lover boy,” Fulgur teased.

     And Shu went mute after saying, “On my way!!”

     “Babe?”

     After gently knocking on your door, Shu opened your studio door. You turned your gaming chair around and stared at him with your glassy eyes. “Have you muted and paused your stream?” he asked, glancing down at your monitor. Shu held out a glass of water for you.

     You nodded and took the glass from his hand. After drinking half of the water and put the glass on your desk, your hand immediately grabbed the clothes that Shu was wearing and pulled him closer. There was really nothing strange here. It was just that your instinct to get spoiled by Shu got stronger when you’re down.

     Shu didn’t said anything and just put his arms around you. You buried your face in his stomach. “Do you still want to continue the game?” Shu asked, pulling himself away from you a little. His voice was soft and almost a whisper. His hands never stop cradling your hair.

     That was when your tears ran down your cheeks again. You could only nod, answering your lover’s question. Shu didn’t even care that his clothes are wet because of your tears.

     “Then tell me what happened.” Shu pulled himself and slowly knelt before you. One of his hands helped you wipe your tears and the other hand gently caressed your thighs, comforting you. “Tell me what’s wrong. What’s upsetting my baby, hm?”

     You tried to control your sobbing. But after Shu asked with his sweet and gentle voice, you wanted to cry even more.

     “I’m just frustrated,” you admitted between your sobs. “I-I’m frustrated with myself. I’m sorry.”

     “Oh, babe…” Shu cooed. “You don’t have to say sorry.”

     Shu knew saying how cool and good you were during the game won’t comfort you. It will only make you more upset with yourself.

     “Baby, look at me.” Shu took your hands slowly and held them tightly. His thumb rubbed them gently, hoping it would calm you down.

     You mustered up the courage to look at him.

     “Listen, this is our first official esport tournament as NIJI EN, right?”

     “Mm-hm,” you nodded.

     “Well, you see. This kind of thing happens because everyone is under pressure, including you, including me. The anxiety, the nervousness, all those things distract us. You see, being too focused makes us overly tense and forget how to have fun. Even Selen and I feel pressured because this isn’t a normal Valorant stream we used to have where we can play as we please,” Shu explained.

     “I’m sorry I played rashly and carelessly earlier,” you mumbled, still trying so hard to not to cry again.

     “I told you; you don’t even have to worry about it.” Shu’s eyes never leave you, and he looked at you with so much love and patience. “You know it yourself that there is no right or wrong in this kind of games. Adapt yourself to the game and your team as comfortably as possible. In this game, what’s important is the result. It doesn’t matter if you die early or survive until the end. As long as you can win, that’s enough.”

     Shu released one of his hands and tucked some stray hairs behind your ear before he rubbed your cheek gently. “And you, you were so cool when you helped me and the others earlier. Your aim is crazy. If I’m someone else, I won’t believe that you just started Valorant after me.”

     You lowered your gaze. Insecurities hit you once again, assuming that Shu was only saying that to comfort you. But Shu’s hand gently made you look back at him.

     “No, no. Eyes on me. I’m telling you the truth.” Shu continued, “Even if you died earlier, we still won the game, right? And you contributed to that victory. You played an important role in the earlier rounds. Do you understand?”

     You nodded and wiped your tears for the last time. “I do,” you whispered. “Thank you, Shu.”

     “Don’t mention it,” he smiled as he handed you the rest of your drinking water.

     After making sure you were calm enough, Shu glanced to your chat which still seemed worried about you. “Well, let’s see…” the sorcerer read your chat quickly. “Looks like we’ve been gone for too long. Chat is starting to get more worried.”

     “Do you want to cry for a little bit more?” Shu once again looked at you and asked.

     You shook your head and rolled your gaming chair over to your desk. Shu also stood up, following you. Too tired of crying and realizing your voice was starting to get hoarse, you gulped down the remaining water that Shu had previously handed over to you.

     “Since we cannot have you upset—well, I personally can’t have my baby upset, do you want to switch up with Finana so you can have a break for the final rounds? I can have Elira arrange that for us.” Shu gave you a suggestion.

     “No, I want to play with you. I’m fine now,” you uttered, voice still cracking.

     “Alright then.” Shu wiped your last tears and kissed your forehead gently.

     You put your headset back on and tidied up your set. Shu helped you get ready and made sure you were completely okay. After turning your mic back on and continuing your stream, Shu stepped back a little to make room. “There you go.”

     You greeted your chat and apologized to them for waiting so long and worrying them. Of course, your chat was immediately filled with the “It’s fine,” or “Are you okay now?” comments.

     “Just go straight to the collab vc channel,” Shu stated, his voice audible to your viewers. “And [Y/N]’s chat, please comfort them in my place, okay?” Your chat was immediately flooded with obedient comments from your fans like, “Understood, Marshal!” or “Roger that, Shu!”

     “I’m okay now, Shu!” you whined.

     The sorcerer could only chuckle. “Yes, yes. I’ll take my leave now, babe. I can’t leave my chat alone too. Good luck.”

     Once again before he left your studio, Shu kissed the top of your head and ruffled your hair.

     “Mm-hm, good luck to you too, love.”

     “Eyyy!!!” Shu’s solid eys cut through the others’ conversations on the Discord channel.

     “Oh, you’re back!” Selen cheered.

     “Welcome back, Shu.” And Fulgur was welcoming the gamer back. “How is [Y/N]?”

     You went back into the voice call channel and turn on your microphone. “I’m fine now. I’m really sorry with a lot of things, especially how unprofessional I have been. I really messed up earlier. I’ll do my best from now on,” you uttered your apologies and explanations to your teammates with a hoarse voice.

     “You don’t have to worry about it,” Rosemi was welcoming you back with giggles.

     Likewise with the others, they started quarreling again while comforting you. And surely it managed to make you laugh. “Thank you guys. Please take a good care of me.”

     “Please take good care of us too, [Y/N],” Elira said between her giggles from the previous jokes the others made. “Anyway, Couch Ovid, what was the strategy again? Can you explain it to Shu and [Y/N]?” Elira continued, adding some tease for him.

     “Alright, alright.” Fulgur began to explain what he and the others had compiled. Thanks to the help of Selen’s “gamer brain,” everyone could devise a strategy that was fit for you and your lover. “So, [Y/N], I need you and Uki to focus on supporting Selen while Rosemi is supporting Shu. Is that okay?”

     “Mm-hm, I’m okay with that,” you confirmed.

     “Shu, just because you’re a predator, don’t you dare to forget that I’m currently your support!” Rosemi aggressively clicking on her mouse, knowing that Shu can easily win the game without any assists.

     “I know, I know,” Shu laughed. “Calm down, easy.”

     When everyone laughed at her malds, you realized someone doesn’t really say much. Until…

     “[Y/N].”

     Just as you were about to call her name, Selen preceded you. “Yeah?” you waited for the lunar dragon to speak.

     “Don’t feel overwhelm on this one, got it? Just enjoy it.”

     You were silent before Selen continued her sentence.

     “We don’t want you to have any regrets in the end. Swallow all such feelings and uneasiness. Whether or not we make it to the semi-finals is a later matter.” Now all fell silent. “Why are you guys so quiet?!” Embarrassed, Selen asked, half shouting.

     “Wow, those were the wisest words Selen ever said,” Uki stated.

     “For real,” Shu agreed with the psychic. Likewise with others.

     “Oh, shut it, will you?!” And that was a reaction that one could guess from Selen Tatsuki.

     Hearing their antics, you could only chuckle. You could hear Selen and Rosemi gasping because you finally laughed. The gloomy and gray atmosphere that had enveloped you and the others was immediately lifted.

     “There they are,” Shu cooed, chuckling sweetly to you. “That’s my baby’s sweet laughs.”

     You gasped when you heard Shu’s chuckles. His chuckle sounded light and soothing to your ears. But unfortunately, that moment had to be broken when Uki and Selen shouted for the two of you to get a room and followed by another laugh.

     “Alright, we can do it!” you told yourself while taking deep breaths to ease your nervousness. “Like what Shu said, there is no right or wrong in this game. Let’s just focus on winning this round and making it to the semi-finals.” And before you focusing yourself to the game, you glanced at your chat. “And do wish me luck, chat,” you whispered.

     Everything was running smoothly. In some levels, you and your team become a Team Ace. On another level, Shu and Selen were carrying the team by themselves. However, towards the final level, something unexpected happened.

     “The hell?!” Selen sneered when the enemy flashed her. It wasn’t long before the sound of Selen’s deafening screams pierced your ears and the others’. “WHAT THE HECK?!” Selen went mald when the enemy dinked her dead.

     The team was immediately in a panic. Selen was the team’s lead carry and your team currently doesn’t have any agent with any revival utility. Meanwhile, the team’s main carry, Shu, tried to stay calm when Selen’s tantrum almost dominated the voice chat channel.

     Panic came back to haunt you. You don’t know how this team would fare without its lead carry.

     “Babe, calm down.”

     “Ah!”

     Before you could lose your focus, Shu pulled you back from your reverie, making you gasp.

     “Selen, that’s fine. And Uki, take her position to carry the team with Shu,” Fulgur gave instructions to the remaining team players.

     You noticed how Selen kept apologizing and malding over her death in the game. Of course, panicking won’t solve the problem. You were wrecking your brain to find a way out of this problem. Your brain was constantly looking for alternatives to win this round.

     4v4 shouldn’t be so bad. Shu had already taken down one opposing player. Until something crossed your mind. Your brain managed to come up with a pretty brilliant idea. “Fuu-chan, will crossfiring help?”

     “But this map is not suitable for crossfiring.” Elira sounded worried.

     The position of the current map was very wide and had few places to hide. Being too far apart from the team might be one dumb way to lose.

     Fulgur seemed to be silent and thinking. He was trying to calculate the winning percentage if the team uses your idea.

     “One down.” Uki suddenly announced after he took down one enemy. “Four versus three,” he stated.

     “NICE, UKI!!!” Everyone cheered amidst the panic.

     Uki managed to reduce the risk of losing. The thing that Fulgur was worried about should lessen a bit. “Elaborate your idea, [Y/N].”

     You took a deep breath before speaking. “Simple! Uki and Rosemi are in the right position, stay there. And Shu—” You paused yourself when you heard your lover’s gun shots. You suddenly heard him hissed in annoyance. He must have just messed up with his aim, you guessed.

     “Shu, if it’s not too much for you, can you move away from Rosemi a little and find the right position to surround our three enemies?” you continued, asking a favor.

     “Nothing is too much for you, babe.” Shu immediately did what you asked.

     To be honest, you yourself know that Shu can shoot from anywhere. Without any strategy from you or others, he can easily win the game. He is a predator, even if he doesn’t want to admit it. However, even though it’s unlikely, what happened to Selen could also happen to Shu. You don’t want that to happen again, especially in a crucial moment to determine your team’s position in the tournament.

     “Thank you. And I’ll rotate and take the flank,” you stated your final strategy.

     “Wait, [Y/N], that’s too far and dangerous!” Finana strongly refuted your idea.

     Selen who couldn’t do anything anymore also pays attention to the strategy you proposed. “It’s fine,” she said. “Shu, Uki, and Rosemi are enough. The three of them had basically already surrounded the enemies. [Y/N], your intention was to cover the escape route, was it?”

     “You’re right!” You smiled as Selen understood the purpose of your plan. “Start firing!” You took your agent to the other side of the map as planned.

     “One down… Two down!” Shu raised his voice in excitement.

     The sound of other cheers sounded even louder. Your chat and the others’ started to hype with the possibility of your team winning.

     “Cypher tries to escape!” Rosemi shouted.

     Luckily, you made it to your proper position in time. You replaced your firearm with a knife and started attacking them. “WAIT, ACK! NO!!” you screamed. Unfortunately, you died because your aim was suddenly messed up due to panic.

     But not long after, an unexpected sight suddenly appears on your PC screen. “Nope!” Shu spoke, accompanied by the sound of bullets. “You killed my lover, senpai! You must die!”

     “OOOHHHH!!!!” Everyone cheered with joy and excitement when the word “WIN” appeared clearly on their respective screens. Chat went crazy and hysterical screams were heard filling the voice chat channel.

     You sighed in relief. Too tired with your overwhelming emotions, you chose to remain silent and hear the others’ triumphant cheers. You leaned back on your gaming chair and closed your eyes for a moment.

     “Babe your chat is filled with “#[Y/N]MVP”!!”

     Hearing Shu say so, you opened your eyes. Sure enough, your chat was flowing with the hashtag that your boyfriend just mentioned.

     “Check the Twitter too…?” you read one of your comments aloud. According to what your chat wanted, you grab your phone and opened blue bird app.

“DAMN, [Y/N] IS THE SAVIOUR OF THE TEAM!!”

“NO WAY, THAT’S SO COOL!! Y/N BASICALLY CARRIED THE WHOLE TEAM!!”

“[Y/N] MPV!!!!!!!!!!”

“THE WAY SHU AVENGE THEIR DEATH OMGGGGGG!!”

“SHU x [Y/N] THE ACE x MPV COUPLEEEEEE!! LETSGOOOOOO!!!”

     It made you want to cry again. No, not crying out of frustration like before, but because you were touched. “Why are our fans so sweet?” you cracked, making others laugh again.

     “Aww, you’re crying again,” Selen giggled.

     “That was a simple yet critical strategy. You two are something else,” Uki also commented.

     “That was a good save,” Fulgur sighed. “Nice job, [Y/N]!”

     Elira added, “Yeah, great job! Wow! Nobody uses Sage. We were too panicked by Selen’s death.”

     “I’M STILL HERE!” Getting called out, the owner of the name went mald once again.

     Meanwhile, Finana and Rosemi were still having fun celebrating the team’s victory and bragging about you being the MPV.

     “Wait, let me divert my voice chat with [Y/N] to dm vc.” Shu mumbled to himself. “[N/N]!!” After celebrating with his chat, the sorcerer switched your voice chat to personal and called you in a cheerful voice. “GG, babe!”

     Shu laughed happily. Hearing it makes your heart flutters. You got a lot of appreciation from your fans and teammates, but his appreciation is what you need the most.

     “Oh my God, chat, the legendary ace himself complemented me! Wow!” You didn’t completely fake your excitement. You were really happy at his complements.

     “Won’t you go to them and hug them for real?” Shu read one of his chat comments. “Babe, should I go there? Yaminions are right, I want to hug you and cuddle you and—”

     “Shu, stop!” you abruptly stop him before he can mention all the things he wants to do with you. “Let’s finish the stream first. We still have evaluation about today’s game with the others. Moreover,” you paused for a moment, paying attention to your and Shu’s chats. “I can have him all night, so I’m giving Yaminions a chance.”

     “AYOO?!” If Shu was drinking or eating something, he might have choked hearing your words. Without a doubt, Shu’s chat and yours went panic and crazy. Seeing their expressions, you just laughed out loud in amusement. “Haha, funny.” Shu faked a laugh.

     “God, someone in your chat said, ‘You don’t have to hide it, Shu. We know you’re also excited.’” Your laugh was getting out of control.

     “They’re not wrong, though!” From his offended tone, you could imagine how Shu was pouting his lips at that moment.

     You could just run into his studio and kiss the pout if you wanted. However, it would be very unprofessional of you if you did.

     A pop up notification suddenly appeared on your and Shu’s phones screen. “What on earth Selen just tweeted?” Shu asked before he read the tweet out loud for you. “With a capslock, ‘Anyone or someone in their stream please tell @ shu_yamino and @ [Y/N][L/N]_2434 to stop making out and rejoin the collab voice chat,’ triple exclamation marks.”

     “What the fuck?” You were stunned, hearing Selen’s tweet from your lover. You glanced at your chat who once again clearly went crazy. “Did they just assume we’re doing that?!”

     “Vox just replied, ‘There is nothing sweeter than the sweetness of victory. Let them have their moment.’” Shu laughed, reading his genmate’s tweet.

     You slumped back to your chair. “Hell on earth. Chat, did you guys hear any making out noises? You’re not, aren’t you?! Such things like you guys watching us doing that didn’t excite me.”

     “BABE, YOU MAKE IT WORSE!!” Now it was Shu’s turn to panic. Your lover was trying his best not to scream and burst the audience’s eardrums. His reaction definitely made you laugh out loud.

     Before this, you felt very down because of your insecurities. But when you’re with him, everything feels better, no matter how chaotic your surroundings are. With him, you don’t have to worry about anything. You surely feel the safest around him.

     Before you moved your voice chat back to the collab channel, you stated between your laughs, “You guys will still clip that moment even if we say don’t, so go ahead. Consider this as the compensation for today’s victory today.”

     “You’re the worst,” Shu sighed.

     Of course you could only giggle. “I love you too.” ----- [FIN].

GG, Babe! A Fiction by Author Xandra January, 2023

[antimony-medusa]

Technoblade Duo Bloodbath - Final Results

[ID: A 16-team seeded bracket, showing the final result is a win for Technoblade & Philza.]

Thank you to @@regicidal-optimism for the graphic design!

The final result of the poll is a win for Technoblade & Philza! Congrats to everyone who participated, and thank you all for your enthusiastic and generous participation in this event! This was a final win of 86% to 14%, or 1,983 votes to 320, meaning that Techno & Phil never fell below holding 85% of the vote in any showdown they were in. A sweep the whole way.

And now, some highlights from the notes.

[ID: tags reading "#no one can compare to the Antarctic Empire"]

[ID: tags reading: #And the emduo sweep is imminent .. as it should be <3]

[ID: tags reading: #oh this is not a fair matchup at ALL. I’m sorry ranboo]

[ID: tags reading: #NO DISCUSSION NECESSARY 🥹]

[ID: tags reading: #im voting techno and ranboo because i will always love them #but i will not be surprised or upset if emduo win]

[ID: tags reading: #ranboo you did good to make it to second #thats number one of all the actual possible challenges #since emduo wins]

[ID: tags reading: #there's only one choice here #for you phil the world #polls]

[ID: reblog reading: WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME]

[ID: tags reading: #E M E R A L D D U O S W E E P #there were never any other contenders]

[ID: tags reading: #polls#option 2#EMDUO SWEEEEEEP#tbh i would have thought they would have left emduo out of this race cause its so obvi that theyd win ya know?#idk emduo always first in my heart]

[ID: tags reading: #yeah this is fair. good finale! good ending to the tournament bracket!]

[ID: Tags reading: #ranboo I'm so sorry Ranboo#great sensei pupil relationship you got there. haunted my thoughts a lot#but alas Phil and Techno best friendis forevs]

[ID: tags reading: #gg ranboo sorry you got doomed by the narrative]

[ID: tags reading: #voting peerpressure because i can't not but i love and respect the emduo sweep#there is nothing to campaign. It's Emeraldduo. It's objective]

[ID: tags reading: #TechnobladeDuoBloodbath #Technoblade #Philza #Poll #GO GO EMDUO #CHOSE PHIL #WHO ELSE BUT PHIL #“TECHNO AND ME GO WAY BACK” - C!PHIL 2021 #THINK ABOUT MCM MCC ANTARCTIC EMPIRE THE SYNDICATE SBI #GO GO AEDUO #emerald duo #antarctic empire #“FOR YOU PHIL THE WORLD”-TECHNO 2021]

[ID: tags reading: #i canmot even propaganda this one #as much as peerpressure holds my heart theres no beating the fucking antartic empire man]

[ID: tags reading: #i mean phil obv sweeps this ez but I am really happy we got an all syndicate finale]

[ID: tags reading: #Yeah Phil must sweep. It's because both Ranboo and Techno are voter frauding for Phil rn]

[ID: tags reading: #FOR YOU THE WORLD PHILLL]

[ID: tags reading: #ANTARCTIC EMPIRE RULES THE WORLD BABEY]

[rockintapper]

hi again!!!!!1

the 1first one, the 2second one

heres me saying stuff about rhythm heaven fever charactersss yaaaayyyy

title girl - pres A and B to start!; what have they done to you

marshal, cam, and miss ribbon: the sillies ever hellooo hiii yayyy,,

monkey and mandrill (hole in one): someone in a yt comment section headcanoned that these two were gods. uh

golfer - is your foot okay

robot (gray/grey): oh, yeah!

robot (white): let's go! (screwbot factory 2 is so fun to play ^_^)

see and saw: YAOIIIIIIIIIIIIII

a boy/kouhai: autism be damned my guy can KICK /silly

his crush/senpai: ngl if i were kouhai i'd be blushing too

weasel couple: why is the girl weasel pink. why. why. why. w

fork: fork

monkey (tambourine): YOURE SO CUTE I WANNA SQIUSH YOU RHAUHURHUAHRAUHHRAHRAHARHU

frogs (tambourine): guh

the executives: they make good points. [spinning in a chair]

assistant: woouohwouuouwowuuowuuH

small monkeys: GOD I LOVE MONKEY WATCH /ref

monkey (remix 2): why is the girl monkey pink. why. why. why. w (shes serving though)

dough dudes: thats what theyre called???

mr. game and watch: what's a guy like you doin in a game like this? /silly

widget: hi widgets (i love built to scale 2 rhf)

baxter and forthington: YAOIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

muscle doll: [heavy sigh]

reporter: wubadubaduba, 'zat true?

wrestler: e.

employee #333-4-591032: is munchy momnk your cousin or something /pos

microbe: THEYRE COLORED LIKE IKIGUSARE /VVVVPOS

demons: STOP STEALING FROM PEOPLE

pinwheel girl: gender? i barely know her

another child: wait i thought that was the pinwheel girls mom. wdym shes Another Child /gen

ann glerr: she has muscles. Muscles. character made specifically for lesbians /j

quicknibble: tniy snalll lmaoooo

pausegill: pausegill what the fuck /ref

threefish: once you get the hang of threefish, catch of the day is gg ez no re (<- got it immediately)

captain tuck: he'd be a polar bear. prove me wrong /j; him in the superd screen AHHH /VPOS

flippers: the cuties wauuwiuawuaiwa <333

pitcher: fuckin idiot hats what you get for cheating /lh

slugger:SLUGGER??? S;UGG??ER/ SLIUGG??? SWLUD?? SLGU..?? SLUG??? Watashime S

the huebirds of nah im skipping this one

rhythm rockets: no way its rocket rhythmrocket on tumbler!!! i didnt know they were in this game!! /silly

uh… those guys?: donk DWONK!; man. donk-donk gives me so much joy forever. i love donk-donk.

bossa and nova: they would do so many arts and crafts projects together <3

love posse ft. mc adore: into you! (into you!) (love rap is kinda hard for because i keep tapping too early :( )

the tall TAPPPEOPFWHOULWRIBUILRBVBWEFYBNOIQDWR3YW808u(&^^^^#$q@#%^THE TAPT T AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

the shrimp scamperers: you will never be them /j

school library pep squad: let's everybody go! yay!

bunny man: bunny man 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀

girl from samurai slice 2: YAAAAY SHES SO HAPPY AAUHIGHLFVHUBFW THE CUTIE YAYYY

the dough person from working dough 2: what's in that cup. what does that Liquid taste like. is it tea

lady golfer: so proud of her transition <3 /j

cat: Cat. C (hi kasper)

pigeon (hato-kun): boy why you so eepy

clock (mezamashi-kun):if i was that pigeon id have such a negative reaction to that ringing (i hate alarms

beans (omame-chan): i almost didnt notice you hello hi

lady cupid: her and love-san HATE each other /silly

kasuke and kosuke: YURIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

girl's basketball team: why is the hoop alive

frog and frog princess: what if people mistake them for a roach and

chameleon: a precursor to that chameleon minigame in megamix

flies: whats the point of this one

clap trap doll: people Despise you and im curious as to why

driver: tHE FUCKING CHICKNE??? FROM

lieutenant: it's you!

police call guy MY SON HE HAS EVERY DIEASE THE CUTIE THE SILLY MY BABY MY BOY I LOVE HIM SO MUCH I WANNA CRUSH HIM LIKE A BUG /VAFF

mr. hi-hat: if you were used in a normal drum set you would not survive

springs (hi-hat): MR UPBEAT??

rhythm fighters: i dont really care about these guys. uh yaoi

okay thas it.

WOWWOWWOW. OTOKO WA

MISSING YOU SABISHII

OH IT'S BLUE…

CRYING /LY

copy and pasted from notepad in case something happened while i edited this post!

[somewhere-in-a-microwave]

My predictions for the new upcoming JSR game

[WARNING: CONTAINS SPOILERS FROM LEAKS]

Coin will reappear and be a SECRET playable character - He might die or not, we'll just have to see.

Alternate colour palettes and outfits - I feel like some of them would be important to whatever lore is about to come up, e.g a jester outfit for Beat with details somewhat reminiscent of someone else...

Finally getting an explanation why Beat's trait is 'failure' - I feel like the reason would be so wild, no one is going to handle it.

Going to the afterlife? Hell? Demon realm? - We're gonna get sucked up like a vacuum into a portal and the screen blacks out, and then we end up in the D e m o n R e a l m.

I won't elaborate - Beat eats a spider or something eats Beat.

The Wish - I have a few ideas of this. The wish might depend on what character you're playing as resulting in different endings, OR Beat's wish would make the world have a spasm. Kouya/Koya? would be having his wish accidentally ruin all of Tokyo Island.

Noise Tank rivalry - Whenever the Noise Tanks and the GG's interact, Beat's interactions would be gay.

Romeo and Juliet - Biz falls in love with a Poison Jam member and it will be comically tragic.

Haha very funni - Yoyo will make the weirdest puns or jokes that the background can't decide over a laugh track or complete silence.

Counter Attack! - The GGs will counter the Black Book with... something...

Hello handsome - A new character will make Beat question his sexuality.

For Tokyo Island and Jet Set Radio - In a very climactic point, Rudies, Gangs and the GG's team up to go fight and save Tokyo Island.

[formulawolff]

Sweet!! I'm over the moon with Toto being nothing but absolutely sweet and passionate when talking about GG in the media, and I want this man so much, so much that I can cry! I love seeing how much he is also affected by the distance, it seems like they put him into abstinence and I confess that I love seeing men addicted to their women, it sounds like music in my ears!

We need to talk about how loyal and perfect Alex is, him buying into her pain and being the BEST friend that everyone would like to have, James won't end that either, amen!

George and Lewis also being the best in the world, I want to keep them in a jar so no one can hurt them and that's about it!

Querida, você conseguiu de novo, me fez apaixonar pelo post de hoje e me deixou ansiosa para os próximos, mal posso esperar.

I hope you're taking good care of yourself, okay? Luv ♡

toto is just so in love at this point the pr teams don't matter and he just wants to ensure that everyone knows how much he loves his sweet girl-

i could literally ramble about alex and gg's friendship for hours. i love both of them so much. i wish both of them could just move to merc and be a trio with george so the besties could all be reunited :')

i just love writing about friendship, especially in a world so competitive and gritty as formula 1. they all deserve to be the best of friends because the fans and the media tend to pit them against each other (and i hate it sm)

and i am taking care of myself! :') tsym for that <3 ily!

[rainbowsky]

As GG said, don't eat too many melons or you'll get diarrhea. 😅

Still, DD's rumored itinerary for the YH Family Concert is pretty exciting. Fingers crossed! 🤞🏻

DD solo performance of ROMW

Uniq performance of Monster

DD dance performance with the e-mark team from One and Only

Like I'm fond of saying - melons are to be enjoyed but not to be believed!!

[gear-project]

. . .

Due to a lot of things, and the fact I just needed a distraction, I took a hiatus. I'm actually STILL recovering from my time in the Hospital, but it's nothing significant.

Those who follow my channel know I've been on a Huge CODE VEIN kick for a while now... it's Halloween and I just felt in the mood for being ALL ABOUT VAMPIRES.

Vampire History permeates Guilty Gear, but there's barely any aspects of the story that really discuss that history... I wish I could rectify that in a later post, but we'll have to just wait and see what Team Red actually bothers to do in the future.

I know a lot of people don't like my views on what is canon versus what is accepted canon and Gaiden as a concept... and even more people don't like my views on distinctions on what is confirmed versus what they think is obvious when it comes to controversy over characters' ethnic appearances... Just understand that I just want the facts, and only the facts.

Even for the case of President Vernon E. Groubitz, GG Strive barely mentions his background, even if the "obvious" can be claimed about his history by fans' headcanons.

At this point I feel I should just stop "dying on this hill" as friends have suggested and just let people think what they want.

Discussing GG Lore with people is still something I'm willing to do... but I think at this point there's a lot of people who have their own takes on that history... so unless you want mine, I'll just leave things be.

I'm just one historian, in the end... so what I say and my views are still mine, I suppose... but just understand my purpose: to filter out all the things that distract from the truth behind that history. Even the history behind its authors and creators... some of whom we haven't heard from in a while (I'm still keeping an eye on Toshimichi Mori, even if he's technically left ASW).

Fighting games aren't the only genre I enjoy discussing lore on, but I think for the purposes of this blog, I will stick to what I am most passionate about.

Friends have suggested I make a new blog, but I'm not sure how far in I want to go for that... for now I'm just more or less focused on sharing content that I think more people should get exposed to. Whether that content is videogames, or music, or art, or something else that could engage and inspire someone.

In the lull between GGST DLC releases, I've been playing other games and reflecting on what's needed from me to contribute to this community as a fan... well, it's not much (even if I have a history of overdoing things).

Just be patient with this old man and I'll think of something cool to do later on to share with everyone.

[art-i-know-yes]

SPOILERS FOR LIMITED LIFE FINALES

im in class

Tango's Pov

rip skizz pour one out

laaaaassstttt epissoooooddeee

rough session is...yeah

"im the lowest!" "that's why you're in charge"

hiding. the plan is hiding.

Martyn always plans names

already bombing

team merge

bread bridge 2 is the hellscape

learning your lesson

scott is NOT waiting

Nosey Neighbors, TIME, Scott, and The Clockers

yeeeeaaaaahhhhhh

rule #1 is to always look up

one death and Etho is GOONNEE

grian scream :D

grian death :(

wow he wanted his time back

right back at him

BDUBS

awww ur soulmate

that looks awful

TANGO

oooo wasn't grian

surprise scar

14 MINUTES

they're hunting each other

DID THE BORDER MOVE

FALL DAMAGE

when did cleo die

rip tango

Scott's POV

whatcha doing babe

silent huh

YOU'RE NEARLY YELLOW

that's a lie

i just got Grian's notification

not for long

oh so martyn actually left the mean gills

im so excited to who's gonna win bc is not The Clockers

real time bomb set up

so...it went badly

one death

ok kinda figured it was planned

yes. very important to the deal.

gg babe

im so excited for Grian's pov bc wtf

like I know it's a game but like

scott dies in here

'sorry spilled my lava'

jinx

yeaaahhhh

a lot is happening

some of them hours

he's really just handing them out

scott is terrifying is the lesson

my heart

rip babe cause like

scott loses this game so sorry Beyonce

knew it was a play

"impulse :["

grian babe you had 5 hours. to have lost a solid 3.

OMG

Scott's--UGHH. the music he put scared me and THEN he backed away off the ladder. my heart.

GRIAN--WHY YOU ALWAYS AFTER SCAR

ALL THE CLOCKERS ARE OUT

"underwater?" "underwater." *next clip not in the water*

"i just wanna talk"

oooo they do (another headcannon lmao pearl and grian are siblings. of course very popular)

forgive each other's sins

"you can't see it from the ground" -joel

it's just up and up

so under bread bridge

plz no

grian is a 'yes and' man

GRIAN'S HACK

DIVE BABES

well there goes them

who died there

peaaaarll

RUN BIGB

HELL YEAH

"round table of compliments" for skizz!

scott keeps looking up and it's so funny

awwwwww

"you scare me" "awww"

"and now we kill each other"

rip bigb

bigb hacks

byeeeee dan

betrayal arc from i e

"martyyynnnn they tried to kill me" "who what where" "impulse and ethoooo" "alright they're dead" it's so cute

side note: my favorite thing out of this season is people being like 'this is a kindergarten playground.' i love it so much bc it's keeps it fun and cutesy. still love my angst tho

MEAN GILLS love em

the idea of everyone being like 1 or 2 deaths kicking them out the game is like exhilarating

oh. martyn.

NOO GRIAN last 6

everybody's off

BYEEE ETHO

Scott's so good

bye bye PEARL

mean gills vs impulse

8 minutes

even playing field

AHHHHHHH MARTYN

I figured it be one of them

HE WON YES OOO MEAN GILLS

babe said put him down

"my own mean gill. and i wouldn't have it any other way."

ya know the entire sun, star, moon win thing we got going on. well we have the Listener/Watcher which kind of fits in.

this is the the second time I've learned who won by actually watching and not just looking it up

Grian's Pov

solidarity. huh.

"my stuff"

i did vaguely think about boogey

well i wonder if that happens

"it works!"

well. there's that trap.

where's your mother

"went out for milk with the neighbor" lmao

oh. well. good idea.

he really is bc he's been wandering like this entire ep

literally did not hear a word from Grian other than a scream in...there

they're bullying him/j

was that a grian kill? i thought that was a tie kill

bad boy till the end

fun fun fun for the boy

the silent fights are the best bc you know they're all stressed

oh you created that one the sky height

IT WAS GRIAN

awww his cackle

it genuinely makes me very happy

he's just begging

ohhh that explains that one

oh that was pearl's

OH HE GOT CLEO TOO

final kills should give an hour

this season nobody actually ran out of food

like piranhas

too bad neither was right

the bridge will provide

potato pier will also provide

ok so i was right

gUlp

ya know each session is like 3 hours and so 8 episodes is basically 24 hours

oh so if you're in the same side you can't do anything but lmao

"MY BREAD"

babe just drowned

50 SECONDS

from every angle

what kills you grian I'm so curious but i have 8 more minutes

it's the feeling of being a badboy

awww scar's little 'cUtEgUy"

PROTECT THE PODCAST

ohhhh OHHH BC HE GAVE ETHO THE SWORD

even stevens

it's just loop and loop and loop

"pearl-friends PEARL.FRIENDS."

pearl is too feral

good luck

this music

WOOOOWWWW. YOU PULLED A JIM. YOU PULLED A JIMMY.

rip my bad boy

"ooOOOOoOooO spooky"

you did well tho. very good.

Jimmy. jimmy please. I SO BADLY WANT TO KNOW YOUR REACTION.

sighhhh the bad boy way spreads. they all died on bread bridge.

MARTYN'S MY LAST ONE AND I WOULD HAVE ACTUALLY FINISHED THE SERIES THE DAY OF AND NOT MONTHS AFTERWARDS...

Martyn's Pov

very excited to watch.

im listening on 2x speed bc he mostly with views I've watched

untrue and you know it

very funny fast speed voices

water people love it

oh he did that

oh so much happened

fast suspense music

for the /j

"Wow this map is huge" Yeah literally half of the map was just ignored

3 numbers that kill you from boat drop

you know the fact that Scott let them do that but i guess it makes sense bc he's pretty honest but

wow martyn

nope just Grian

he was instant with that jump

he killed etho WOO

mad maneuvers

almost pulled a tango

had to change it back to normal speed. headache :(

mean gills double team

you got him with his own bucket

scott was putting on work

'hard sweat hard sweat why you gaming so hard'

4 hr 8 min

like our fore fathers who watch on

lmao went insane

why we counting down

fair. ominous.

back here

OH YEAH I FORGOT ABOUT THE FRAGMENT SOUL THINGS

is he free from being a Listener now that his soul is safe

im so spacey that i can't really understand

ok wait. there are watchers. they are Listeners. not free but still trying to run away from a choice. after each perma death(?) [for martyn] there's a soul fragment and woven together they make his soul.

that's the gist, right?

ANYWAY THATS THE END AND AHAHHHHHHH IM SO HAPPY HE WON WOO

annnnddd im actually caught up on every pov bc the first 2 i only watched grian and in dl i got too behind and only watched grian's finale (as well as Jimmy's but...we all know how that ended)

anyway im happy. im scared to read angst. and i really want to see more of the kindergarten playground au type beat. but. yeah. that was fun.

[saltynsassy31]

Oh god I did NOT have fun this splatfest

Even though I e had majority wins, got 100x, it just wasn't....fun, I didn't even do tri color anymore after so many mirror matches

I actually started crying over a stupid game when there was only about 10 minutes left for the event to end

I wanted to leave on a win then watch the squid sisters but didn't even get to do that, I lost the two rouds, then when there was 2 minutes left it disconnected, then when there was 1 minute left I joined a battle which THANKFULLY I won (though, half way through 2 people disconnected from the other team, so kinda of an unfair fight but a win is a win and I was in tears) but I missed the squid sisters :(

I just....I'm so tired, I don't even care who wins anymore, congrats to everyone I guess

I was really excited for this splatfest too cuz it would kick-start my 2 week break but that ended in disaster for me and I don't even know why....

GGs for everyone though, I know yall are tired of seeing me in the tags, so this will be me signing off till the next one, peace ✌

[k3nny-l4mbda]

i genuinely don't understand the events between halflife 1 and 2 so if you could actually tell me how the seven hour war started

Oh girl lemme tell ya, it's a doozy (I don't actually remember what that means).

Let's start by setting the time and place, we are in the desert of New Mexico, the date is... unsure, it's somewhere between the 2000 and 2009 since the Half Life manual, Gordon Freeman is late to work, he goes

Oh girl lemme tell ya, it's a doozy (I don't actually remember what that means).

In the 50s the Black Mesa Research Facility was built, they research a ton of stuff but our main focus should be on the secret projects such as research into extra-dimensional travel, teleportation, and the study of the borderworld Xen. The Black Mesa Incident happend on May 16 200- (between the 2000 and 2009), here's how it started, sometimes before the incident sicence expeditions where performed to study and collect data from Xen using a teleport withing the Sector F, dozens of researchers died in these researches, but Xen inhabitants and wildlife were still brought to Earth for studies in Sector E. Soon the Xen Survery Teams recover several Xen crystals, which are studies in Sector C's Anti-Mass Spectrometer.

May 11 200-, Colette Green recives a memo telling her that the surpervision team is intrested in the Xen crystal sample GG-3883, Geen's experiments on this sample revealed some unexpected spectral analysis fluctuations, she has identified it as the purest and largest sample yet, therefore the sample GG-3883 replaces the original chosen sample EP-0021, usually a change in sample this fast is a violation of normal anomalous material handling protocol, but these instructions have likely come from the Black Mesa Administrator Wallace Breen, it's apparent that this new sample GG-3883 was brought to Sector C by none other than the G-Man.

May 16 200-, most of Sector C is preparing for the experiment, this is delayed by Gordon Freeman running late, his job is to manually operate the Anti-Mass Spectrometer in the Test Lab C-33/a, this delay is convenient for the sience team since they use this time to make more preparations and recover from a minor system crash across the facility. The Anti-Mass Spectrometer safety buffer zone is below 90%, but the Sector C staff takes the risk and boosts the power to 105% Eli Vance argues against this decision but is overruled. Another scientist, Harold, warns Dr. Rosenberg about the danger of this energy boost, so Rosenberg discusses this with Richard Keller, but Keller has not power to change the operating levels since Breen insisted on this matter, because of this immense power output Black Mesa experiences several minor black outs.

As Freeman enters the test chamber with his HEV Suit on, Gina Cross delivers the Xen crystal sample to the chamber, Colette Green works the Anti-Mass Spectrometer from its lower maintenance level, at this point Eli Vance is contacted by the G-Man whom whispers to "prepare for unforseen consequences", this makes Eli contemplate on aborting the test, but ultimately decides against it. Freeman activates the device with the rest of the science team monitoring the experiment from the upper control room, of the scientists notices a small discrepancy in the readings but dismisses it as it goes back to the acceptable bounds. The sample arrives and Freeman pushes the Materials Handler that holds the crystal into the beam of the Anti-Mass Spectrometer… the result is catastrophic, the main beam pulsates and expands, the Anti-Mass Spectrometer explodes as the science team try to shut it down and get Freeman out of the room, all to no avail, they get killed by a beam of energy that cascades thru the control room window. As the Anti-Mass Spectrometer goes critial a Resonance Cascade occurs, this rips a hole thru the dimensional space and teleports Xen creatures into the facility.

The Resonance Cascade has immediate catastrophic effects, the teleported Xen creatures, trapped in an alien environment begin to attack the Black Mesa employees, structural damage is dealt to the facility, elevators collapse and ceilings cave in, sirens blare thruought the facility, as Gordon wakes up he heads his way thru the remains of Sector C, he sees survivors such as Eli Vance that tells Freeman that all the phones in the facility have been knocked out as he heals another wounded scientist. Gina Cross, Colette Green and Rosenberg survived and make their way to the surface calling in the military to help with the alian onslaught, the Hazardous Environment Combat Unit arrive quickly and deploy troops and vehicles via aircraft and trains, they are also instructed to permanently silence the facility personnel, they enter the facility and establish control and begin making inroads into the extensive underground facilities, thus setting up fortified outposts to keep aliens and survivors at bay, they capture Dr. Rosenberg which sends a distress signal, they lock him in a railway cargo for interrogation, meanwhile Barney Calhoun our beloved baby boy, awakens in a collapsed elevator, the collapse was caused by the Resonance Cascade, He escapes the crumbling facility, locates and frees Dr. Rosenberg, together they reach the abandoned A-17 Prototype Test Labs used for teleportation experiments, there they use the teleport to escape the facility after Barney makes a trip to Xen to activate the necessary device for the teleportation and recharging the spare battery.

Fast forward towards to Chapter 11 of Opposing Forces neatly named The Package, at this point the Black Ops have been deployed for a while in order to cover the whole incident by deploying the Mark IV Thermonuclear Device, Adrian Shepard, the protagonist of Half-Life Opposing Forces and former HECU soldier sees a Black Ops assassin activate the bomb, Adrian kills the assassin and deactivates the bomb, after he proceeds to a nearby room with the view of the bomb, he sees G-Man reactivating the bomb, Adrian has no way of going back to deactivate it once again so the destruction of Black Mesa becomes an inevitable outcome, in the meantime Freeman makes his way underground to finally reach the Lambda Complex, there he jumps into a portal that leads him to Xen, Adrian misses his target Gordon Freeman by mere seconds, seeing him jump in the portal just after opening the door.

Gordon makes his way thru several portals in Xen until he reaches the Nihilanth in its lair, Freeman kills the Nihilanth destroying its brain thus freeing the enslaved Vortigaunts, as the creature dies it floats upward and explodes in a big green blast that sends Gordon unconcious, when he wakes up he is confronted by the G-Man, which praises his actions and survival skills, he explains that his employers agree that Gordon posessed limitlessssssss potencial and authorized G-Man to offer him a job, in this time the two have been teleported in several places, the last teleportation takes them to the same tramcar Freeman rode on the morning of May 16, but flying thry space, Gordon accepts the offer and steps in a portal, finding himself floating in nothingness.

After the Black Mesa incident a small inter-dimensional rift causes Portal Storms to rage all across the Earth, this brings a ton of Xen wildlife onto Earth, protection centers were set up across the planet to try and deal with these hostile aliens. These portal storms catch the eye of the Combine, an inter-dimensional empire responsible for making the Nihilanth and its minions flee to the borderworld Xen, the Combine so prepare a full-scale invasion on Earth, this promts a war, a war that ends in just 7 hours. The war ended when theCombine overwhelmed Earth's military forces, so Wallace Breen negotiated Earth's surrender saving the remaining survivors og humanity at the price of their freedom, Breen becomes the Earth administrator, Eli convinces the now freed Vortigaunts to side with humanity against the Combine. 20 years later the Freeman comes back and that's another walltext

sry if I got something wrong or glossed over some important stuff but my doggo wanted do play, and who am I to say no, I highly reccomend watching stuff like Neinfeld's Half-Life videos or MarphitimusBlackimus videos that explain some GoldSrc stuff

[alphabetsoup-blogposts]

Yeah,

I made that more than crystal clear to E and R on different occasions and, at the end, to D and K. I also made it clear to members of staff along the way and to friends, old and new. I did that over and over precisely because I couldn't work out what the channels of communication were and I was just desperately trying to push the right button. "I don't want this. I'm worried that this is part of a bizarre career plan that R and B have made for me. If it were I wouldn't be interested. I don't know why these creepy evening interviews, contrived, combative punishment committees and ritual humiliations are happening over and over to me when I'm already struggling. I can't imagine anyone wanting to join the Brotherhood. I like research. I could be happy at home. I want to get away. This is a mental health issue. I've contemplated suicide. I'm perpetually exhausted and wrung out from the stress of it."

And always the smug smile and the batting the point away like I don't know my own mind, my own feelings, my own self. Like they're happy to treat me like an object, assume they know better than me about myself. "You'd be bored..." was the most common and absolutely insane refrain (how's that working out for you, then, as a life theory?) but there were so many formulae. Like a mantra, like brainwashing.

And, I don't know what more to say if neither I nor you can be heard.

I catch the jokes about "I don't want to be President" but if you're not GG then please either disengage from it all or at least, accept that this isn't a joke for me. Whatever it is or was, it's a lost life.

As for "President", you and I both know well enough that high status status jobs actually only seem great from the outside because of the words "high status" but they're almost certainly not that much fun and if you really don't like the community or the activity that comes with the job it's bound to be a pretty sh*tty experience, really. I don't like sitting still, or listening to certain modes of speech and I really, really hate role play.* It was not a senior community I aspired to be a part of. Let's just leave it there.

One other thing, a couple of decades of being nudged, supervised, humiliated, upbraided and overtly controlled by dozens of influential people with apparent dodgy back-channels to one another (*whisper*, *wink, *nod*) is extremely radicalising. I can try to explain and go through thought experiments but I don't know what would make it click. But here's the thing. Being radicalised like this leaves you disconnected and in a state of being on-the-outside-looking-in. In other words, it leaves you without any real investment in the community or society in question and lacking the intuitive or subliminal perspective that allows individuals to sort the sheep from the goats (Senior vs Junior, Us vs Them, Make an impression vs Hang out casually, Be polite vs Silly banter, Intimidating vs Intimidated, Celebrities vs Nonentities, Kings vs Hobos, U vs Non-U, Team to Win vs Team to Beat). We associate "radicalisation" with violence but I don't think that's a necessary consequence (channelling anger into violence is probably a component of the "reorientation" and "rebuilding" that cults do on the back of a prior radical dislocation). What is inevitable, tho', is a process of distillation, arriving at the bare essentials without the schemas, conventions and norms. And, for me the one bare essential is finding (or recovering) a bit more friendship-companionship-and-warmth—free from gaslighting—before I die. Alpha and Omega.

*Outside party games (which I enjoy),—ie, at work, when the stakes are high, when honesty is at a premium, when we are supposed to be the grown ups, when people who come to justice neither consent to the "play" nor will be allowed any latitude for dissimulation themselves. I understand that form, pomp, pretense, ritual and retreat into the trappings of a role are replicated all over the world and are probably necessary to protect the "process" but it often feels like bad faith and I strongly dislike it.

[meredithhk8702]

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[anand07723]

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