#Telemachus and Pyrrhus

[moonlitenvyillust]

(I got bored and what if it's gender fluid Telemachus too)

Guard #3: I forgot their gender...

Guard #1: what?

Guard #3: haven't you heard? Telemachus is gender yes

Guard #2: huh?

Guard #4: I heard he swings... Everywhere apparently

Maid: oh haven't you heard? They pulled a few people and refuses to elaborate on how

Epic AU

Odysseus: How many suitors are there? Servant: 128. Though, twenty of them formed a guard, after Antinous turned out to be a dick. Odysseus: *Thinking* Servant: Ten are away with the prince, the other ten are keeping guard over Penelope. Odysseus: Why? Servant: They're being bodyguards Odysseus: No, why did they come if they're not seeking the Queen's hand? Servant: Oh, they're trying to convince the Prince to marry their daughters. *Meanwhile* Guard #1: *Watching Telemachus with one of his friends* I'm starting to think the Prince might be swinging the other way. Guard #2: That's alright, I've got a son.

[no1teleneoshipper]

Telemachus: Why are you staring so much?

Neoptolemus, internally: You are to me like what the sun was to Icarus. Everyday, I ask why you could've chosen me out of all that adore you. Why you chose my companionship. I always crash into others lives and destroy, I do not understand what I did to deserve such a grace as yourself to befriend me regardless of how unlovable I am. You are what will ruin me emotionally out of pining but you are also what made me kind enough to feel these emotions to begin with. In other words, I am inlove with you.

Neoptolemus, Externally: oh nothing, I just zoned out.

[im-an-apollogist]

This is how I'm coping whit Epic ending tomorrow

[opheliaveu]

neoptolemus and telemachus dead dad vs absent dad lets go

original

[tenoart]

I love these two so much hi I've been writing an entire fanfic au about them

[smokey07]

Homer: Are you aware that many Iliad characters are first time fathers? That all of them in one way or another misses a big chunk of their children’s life or never gets to see it at all?

Also Homer: leaves and never elaborates

A doodle for random parenting shiz basically. Order from left to right, top to bottom:

-Menelaus carrying a sleepy Hermione. @hermesmoly I was drawing this when the request came lolol

-Achilles and baby Neo. I don’t know if it’s a thing in other places but hanging on father’s leg and then let him moves it back and forth like an impromptu swing is quite a favorite pastime activity here.

-Odysseus and baby Telemachus who was trying to be a helicopter

-Hector and baby Astyanax when he was born.

-Probably Agamemnon and his three daughters, but I have no official designs. He tried to scold them and was failing. Tbh I feel like Agamemnon would be the type to cosplay buff Bubble from Powerpuff girls along with his daughters. I know he’s not that great but me delulu.

-Patroclus and Neoptolemus. Yes Patroclus contributed in raising him as well, the kid had 2 dads. Fight me.

[cosmicdandeli0n]

Yeeeh, this is from a fanfic of @cassentia

I get determined at 2 am yippie

[kyleesarthell]

Neoptolemus and Telemachus! (3 months later)

[katerinaaqu]

Neoptolemus: I am the most egdy epic cycle son!

Orestes: No! I am!

Neoptolemus: Shut the fuck up! I am!

Orestes: Oh yeah? I have my mommy issues and killed my mother and her lover and I took my cousin prisoner and killed a bastard!

Neoptolemus: Oh yeah? I have daddy issues, I killed a king and a baby on an altar and I took your wife! And without losing my marbles!

Orestes: I'll fucking kill you!

Telemachus: ...

Neoptolemus: What did you do?

Telemachus: Well...I mostly remained in my room sulking and being depressed not having a father and having a depressed mother but eventually I assisted my father lock 108 men in a hall like sheep in a den, I helped him eliminate plenty of them, helped mutilate a slave for life probably he is dead too and I hanged 12 women.

Oreates: ...

Neoptolemus: ...

Telemachus: I was pretty clear when I did that. In fact I did some pest control

Orestes: !!

Neoptolemus: !!

Telemachus: And that happened to the span of one day too

Orestes & Neoptolemus:

[mt-isnothere12]

ah yes iliad new gen: neopronouns, electricity, orator, telephone, piss, and hermeneutics.

[spineless-lobster]

The way characters like diomedes, neoptolemus and telemachus constantly get compared to their fathers without ever actually knowing them is something that can be soooooooo personal

[no1teleneoshipper]

Okay I'll say it. People ship Telemachus and Pyrrhus, but where are the fanfics? It makes me wonder how many shippers there actually is.

I know there's a lot of people who love the ship! I swear, I know! I read all of the literal 10 fucking fanfics from ao3 about them. (And mind you, 2 of them are with ships I don't even like, but I still read because I love them so much. Even if they were only background characters and so was the ship.)

But tell me where are all the fanfics, huh? Where are the modern aus? The high school aus where they're an bestfriends to lovers slow burn or an academic rivals to lovers kind of vibe? Because I swear, every single fandom has one of those. What about a fanfic of Ody like running across Pyrrhus in the palace halls, freshly killed all of the suitors a few days ago and being all like :

"Neo? Why are you here, Aren't you supposed to be at scyros or with Thetis training for a new war?"

And Pyrrhus and Telemachus have to explain and all that. Where's the fanfics of that?

Or what about the same thing with the trope of meeting the parents but it's with deidameia meeting tel?

Or a nice coffee shop au where they're both oblivious and idiots in love with no social life and it's super cliche and they could be in the same college for an extra cliche middle schooler worthy story of a 13 year old girl who just recently transitioned between wattpad to ao3, because fuck it. Those types of fics are my guilty pleasure.

Or what about a cute little 5 + 1 fics or something? Where's those fics? Because no matter the ship, they have that. FIGURE 5, A FANDOM THAT IS DEAD AS FUCK (hi, if you're a figurine it's me @no.1kymieshipper on tiktok I think I'm kind of at least a veteran in the community) HAS ONE OF THOSE. BUT TELEMACHUS AND PYRRHUS? NONE.

I want a cringe fic. I want a beautifully written novel worthy amazingly pitched fic by a girl who's first language isn't English. I want a cross over fic with Lady bug or some shit. I want a fic where it's all angst, with no happy ending what so ever. I want a fic from someone who only knows them for Madeline Millers horribly done books with an great writting style but horrible characterization that is just inaccurate and horrible so they make Dei a bitch, Achilles an innocent little bean, Patroclus a WARRIOR who CANNOT FIGHT, AND PYRRHUS THE MOST RUTHLESS EIGHT YEAR OLD WHO WAS AT FAULT FOR THE ASHES THING EVEN THO IT. DID. NOT. HAPPEN. THAT WAS MADELINES THING.

heck, I'll even stroll through the dark sides of fanfictions and look through watpad for them if I have to. I am THAT desperate.

And I can write, I can. I am in fact writing a fic for them as we speak. I am trying, and trying, and rereading everything. Every little scene. Analyzing every detail. I love them so much they are my cuties.

[iamp1ayer0ne]

This is basically them right?

[chromyo]

I want to try to draw Pyrrhus / Neoptolemus, maybe I will change a bit later !

Pyrrhus and Hermione | Pisisatrus, Telemachus, Pyrrhus and Hermione

[sealinredshoes]

congratulations mister jalapeño, the Ithaca saga hit so hard it made me re-open my old "Remains of Troy" project

(from left to right: Ascanius, Neoptolemus and Telemachus)

Neoptolemus's dad killed Ascanius's uncle, Ascanius is commenting on Neoptolemus height and Telemachus is wondering on how the fuck he will get this team to work diplomatically

[smokey07]

Suddenly check book 4 the Odyssey

So you’re telling me that we could have had the interactions of at least 4 children of the Trojan war heroes???

With Telemachus- Odysseus’ son, Hermione- Helen and Menelaus’ daughter, Peisistratus- Nestor’ son in Sparta that the same time???

And all we need was Neoptolemus- Achilles’ son to actually drag his a$$ to Sparta to get married instead of staying in Myrmidons????

Idc I need them to talk the f out about how their parents were gone for all of their life.