#Taylor Swift handwritten note

[tswiftupdatess]

Handwritten note from Taylor for Chinese fans!

source

[omg-just-peachy]

One thing about me is I love TAYLOR ALISON SWIFT

[justanapparatus]

Death of the Tortured Poet

Taylor Swift and other poets in conversation with Roland Barthes's "The Death of the Author" (1967) and Michel Foucault's "What is an Author?" (1969)

I want to say thank you to @ttpds @youmeetyourself and @ohdorothea. This post would not exist were it not for your musings on the topic, our conversations, and your encouragement. Seriously, thank y'all.

Sources:

Unless otherwise noted, lyrics are from Genius and screenshots/scans/etc are from taylorpictures.net

Barthes, Roland. "The Death of the Author"

"delicate" music video

"Dear Reader" lyrics

Foucault, Michel. "What is an Author?"

"Style" music video

"mirrorball" lyrics

Barthes

Taylor Swift before singing "betty" on the Eras Tour in Glendale, AZ on March 17, 2023 (text from @cages-boxes-hunters-foxes)

Siken, Richard. "The Torn-up Road" in The Iowa Review

Promotional image for The Tortured Poets Department from Swift's social media

Savage, Mark "Midnights: What we know about Taylor Swift's songwriting" for BBC.com

Foucault

reputation prologue

Barthes

Promotional image for The Tortured Poets Department

Barthes

Halsey. "Gasoline" lyrics

"mirrorball" lyrics

Barthes

Florence & the Machine. "King" lyrics

"Dear Reader" lyrics

Foucault

"22" lyrics

Foucault

"Out of the Woods" music video

"...ready for it?" music video

"Anti-Hero" music video

"look what you made me do" music video

"if you're anything like me" from the reputation magazines

Foucault

Album covers for the Taylor's Versions of Fearless, Red, Speak Now, and 1989

Taylor Swift in Musicians on Musicians: Taylor Swift & Paul McCartney for Rolling Stone

"look what you made me do" music video

"the lakes" lyrics

Foucault

"look what you made me do" handwritten lyrics from the reputation magazines

"my tears ricochet" lyrics

Foucault

"my tears ricochet" lyrics

"look what you made me do" music video

Foucault

"hoax" lyrics

"why she disappeared" from the reputation magazines

Barthes

1989 prologue

Foucault

[whatifitis]

♡ All The Stars Aligned - EO 31 ♡

Summary: Esteban is a huge fan of yours, so when he finds out he's going to a premiere for your new movie, he nearly shits himself.

Author's note: This was based on this request and I won't lie, I had quite a bit of fun writing this. I hope y'all like it! <3

WC: 2k+ some insta posts

CW: fangirl esteban, fluff, masterminding, pierre slapping the back of estebans head :)

The planets and the stars aligned, allowing Esteban to be in the same room, at the same time as you. 

It was no secret that Esteban has had a massive crush on you, having watched everything you’ve ever been in and gone through every piece of media you’ve ever participated in - even voicing his crush for you on several occasions. Practically everyone knew of his crush on you, you’d even seen some of the things he’d say about you, flattering you and making your cheeks flush. 

When his colleague, and friend, Charles Leclerc found out he was invited to the premiere, Charles knew he had to invite Esteban, and Pierre could come along as well. 

Esteban's reaction was priceless when he found out he was going to be in the same room as you. His scream could be heard from across the paddock. Charles made sure to record his reaction to show you at some point, if he is able to make a move or two on you at the premiere. 

Esteban knew he had to make a good first impression and come up with a plan on how he would make his move. Most people played checkers, but he was playing chess. He’s gonna lay all the groundwork and then just like clockwork, the dominos will cascade in a line. 

Now, Esteban had a few ideas on how he could impress you, but which one will be the best route? He could either pretend he doesn’t know you and play it cool, but that would be impossible considering the whole world knows about his crush on you. 

After some deliberation with Pierre and Charles, Esteban settles on what he calls “The plan of all plans that will put all the other plans to shame”, it’s a long title and he is well aware but who cares, he’s gonna be in the same room as his celebrity crush, no one would be chill if they were in his shoes right now. 

The plan is simple really, in one of the films you starred in, you and your love interest communicated via handwritten signs on paper. Kind of like the ‘You Belong With Me’ music video by Taylor Swift. Esteban came up with the idea because it is his favorite film ever and he thought it’d be a cute way to get your attention. Now, as for what he was gonna write on said piece of paper? He had no clue. He knew he was gonna carry at least two pieces of paper, one with an initial message and another with his phone number. 

After much deliberation with himself, Esteban decided on a quote from a book he had read a long time ago. He wasn’t sure if you would understand the reference but he thought it would be cute regardless. 

Now, the amount of paper he went through, trying to make the sign look as perfect as he can, is not important information. Just know he went through hell trying to make everything perfect. 

Esteban stood back for a moment to admire his work. A white piece of paper with the words ‘No matter the weather, I want to be with you’. If this fails, Esteban will never face the world again. Ok, that’s a bit of a stretch but he would be very devastated. 

The day of the premiere, the boys were in their hotel room getting ready, watching as Esteban nearly had a mental breakdown. 

“Non, non, non, non.” Pierre and Charles hear coming from the restroom. They watch as Esteban comes racing out in only a pair of underwear, holding his dress shirt on a hanger. “I’ve steamed AND ironed this shirt and there’s still a fucking wrinkle on this fucking FUCK.” Esteban just screams. 

Sharing a look of concern with each other, Pierre and Charles walk up to their friend to see if they can get rid of the wrinkle that he supposedly can’t get rid of on his shirt. 

There’s no wrinkle, “Mate,” Pierre begins, putting a hand on Esteban’s shoulder, “There is no wrinkle. The shirt has no wrinkles.”

“Yes, it does! It’s right there.” Esteban exclaims, pointing at a wrinkle free spot on the shirt.

With a sigh, Charles takes the shirt from Esteban’s hand and tells him, “I’ll take care of the shirt, you finish getting ready. We need to be out the door in an hour.” “An hour?! Oh mon dieu. I still need to iron my pants and don’t even get me started on my hair.” Esteban says, rummaging through his suitcase, looking for god knows what. 

Charles grabs Esteban’s pants and shirt with him into the restroom to iron and/or steam them. Meanwhile Pierre did the best he could in aiding Esteban whilst having a drink or two. 

After a very chaotic hour of Hurricane Esteban, the boys were already walking out the door, making their way to the theater for the premiere. Of course, Esteban was still losing his head, asking the boys a million questions such as, “Did I bring the papers?” Oui, “Do I have my watch on?” Oui, “Do we have the correct location for the theater?” Oui, “Do we-”

“Esteban!” Pierre shouts, “Shut up before I knock you out so hard, you won’t make it to the premiere.” giving the fakest smile known to man. This very quickly got Esteban to keep quiet. 

By the time the boys arrive at the red carpet, Esteban is practically shaking in his boots. He’s scanning the crowd over and over again, listening to everything and anything to get a sign as to where you are. 

“Mate, I think we’ll know when she arrives. I think we will go deaf.” Charles reassures Esteban. 

Esteban looks at his friend and realizes, maybe he can take a breather for now. He can try and calm his nerves before your arrival. 

The boys felt so out of place and lost, they decided to stay in one spot until they found you. That plan didn’t work in their favor though, after about 5 minutes, a crew member for the premiere came up and told the boys to move so that the photographers didn’t have any obstructions in the photos. So they moved to another section of the red carpet, standing in place until they were told once again to move because some dancers would be coming by to do a performance. After being told to move about 8 times, the boys finally found a spot to settle into. 

Esteban took this as a sign that he could finally begin to calm down and relax. They have a nice, safe spot now, one where it would be easy to spot you upon your arrival. Of course, this moment of calming didn’t last long. 

As soon as the crowd of fans started screaming their lungs out, Esteban joined in as well, even though he still hadn’t caught sight of you yet. Charles and Pierre had to cover their ears, hoping they wouldn’t lose their hearing at this moment. 

Esteban had still been screaming for a minute straight before Pierre wrapped his hand around Esteban’s mouth, trying to calm him down, and keep him from embarrassing Charles and himself. Once Esteban had calmed down, he licked Pierres hand. 

“Putain de salope.” Pierre grimaced, shaking his hand as if trying to flick off the spit, “Pourquoi?”

“You were gonna embarrass me! If Y/n saw you covering my mouth with your hand, who knows what she would’ve thought?!” Esteban said, throwing his hands in the air. 

Pierre just stared blankly at Esteban, “I would’ve embarrassed you? Okay, mister. You were screaming your head off like a fucking goat. I just saved your ass.”

“Whatever, now, where is she?” Esteban stands on his toes, as if he isn’t the tallest fucker there. 

In the midst of forcing and faking smiles, your eyes met his through the crowd. 

Putain de merde, thought Esteban. You looked absolutely ethereal in person. You were adorned in a pastel, tulle dress. Pink, green, and blue layers of fabric flow down your body, your torso wrapped by a corset of lace.

He could not stop staring at you, completely enamored by you. 

In the blink of an eye, your silhouette started to make its way to him. 

Remember that plan Esteban had? The one with the pieces of paper with a quote and his phone number? Yeah, he didn’t remember. He was too starstruck to even remember his own name. 

“Hi, you’re Esteban, right? I’m Y/n.” you state. 

“I-, ye- eug- I-” is all Esteban could get out, that is until Pierre smacked the back of his head and ran off into the crowd, followed by Charles as he did not want to be left standing next to a stuttering Esteban. “Hi, yeah. My name is Esteban. How are you?”. There was no hiding his heart eyes from you. It was so painfully obvious, written all over his face. 

“I’m okay, kind of nervous, I’ll be honest. How about you? How are you finding this chaos?”

“It’s really interesting, actually. This is my first time doing something like this so I’m enjoying the show.” he says, giving you the cheesiest smile ever. It was quite cute actually. 

“I’m glad you’re enjoying yourself.” Just before you go to continue the conversation with Esteban, you get called away by your manager, needing you to complete some interviews before heading into the theater for the screening of your new movie.

“Shit, I’m sorry but I have to go. I’ll see you later though?” you ask, watching as Esteban nods his head in approval. As you pick up the skirt of your dress, turning to walk away, Esteban asks “How did you know who I was? How did you know my name?” 

Without a word, you simply wink at him and make your way to your manager across the carpet. 

Absolutely stunned, Esteban turns around to ask his friends if he just imagined that whole interaction, only to find no one around him. Where the fuck did they go?

-=+=-

Liked by estebanocon, francisca.gomez, and 50,823 others

entertainmenttonight Y/n L/n stuns in new (i have no clue who created this dress, couldn’t find the creator)’s dress, as she is welcomed by a warm crowd upon her arrival at the premiere of her new movie.

View all comments

User98 Did yall see y/n and esteban ocon together? 👀

↳User04 My worlds are colliding if that’s true

↳User77 who’s esteban ocon?

↳User32 he’s a f1 driver and he currently drives for the team Alpine!

User47 Y/n could hit me with her car and i’d say thank you

-=+=-

It was nearing time for the boys to head into their assigned room in the theater to watch the film and Esteban was growing anxious by the minute. He really wanted to be seated soon so he didn’t miss a moment of the film, but he couldn’t find his dumbass friends. 

After a few minutes of calling and texting them, receiving no reply, Esteban decided to just leave the boys wherever they were and he made his way inside the theater. 

On his walk to the correct theater room, Esteban couldn’t believe his eyes. The whole time he was freaking out about finding his friends, they were by the food tables the whole time?! Eating chocolate from a fountain?!

“Hey! Where the fuck did you guys go? And why are you eating chocolate without me?” Esteban questioned, mainly upset about the chocolate. 

With a mouth full of chocolate covered snacks, Charles explained “We didn’t want to be caught in the whirlwind of awkwardness that you were exhibiting. And then we found the fountain.”

Esteban just shook his head in disbelief, the utter betrayal he was feeling at the moment. He just took one last look at them before telling them to clean up so they could go sit in their seats. 

When the boys made it to their seats, the screening was about to begin. They watched as the director of the film walked before the screen, only to realize which room they were in. They were gonna be watching the film with the cast and crew?! They all exchanged some looks of disbelief and wondered if perhaps they had walked into the wrong room. Upon inspection of their tickets, they were indeed in the correct room. But how?

After a quick Q&A with the cast and the director, the film began and through the entirety of it, Esteban was captivated. He couldn’t even pay attention to the plot and the story running in front of him. Instead, he was captivated by you, the way your features would illuminate the entire room. His eyes were glued to your figure, always waiting for the next scene that would solely focus on you - you being the only thing that he wants to see for the rest of the night. 

As soon as the film ended, the room erupted in applause and cheers for you and the cast. You and your colleagues stand and bow, thanking the audience for everything and applauding the crew members who helped the film become what it was. 

As the applause and cheers continue, you turn, scanning the room for Esteban. Once you’ve spotted him, you watch as he claps and shouts loudly with a smile plastered across his face. You take it as a chance to blow him a kiss. He all but falls to the floor, needing Pierre and Charles to catch him and hold him up. 

You couldn’t help but laugh at the scene. This man is the funniest and sweetest person you’ve known, and you can’t wait to see him afterwards. 

As everyone leaves the theater, the boys slowly walk about, listening to Esteban rave about the film and how you were so beautiful and talented and smart. He was even gushing about the moment you blew him a kiss. 

“To me! She blew a kiss to me! Can you believe that?” he asks, pointing to himself and squealing like a kid in a candy shop. 

Just as they're about to leave. Esteban feels a tap on his shoulder. He turns and is surprised to find you standing there. 

“Hey, how’d you find the film?” you ask.

“I really enjoyed it. You were amazing, of course. Probably the best part of the film in my opinion. 

You softly laugh, “Quite the flatterer you are.”

“I try” Esteban shrugs, “ehm, I won’t lie. When I found out I was going to be here and that I might get a chance to meet you, I sort of came up with a plan on how I was going to impress you and such. It didn’t really go to plan, “ you both laugh, “I had this plan where I was going to hold up a piece of paper, like as a reference to one of your movies, and then I had another paper with my phone number on it, where I asked you on a date.”

“Can I see the paper?” you ask, genuinely curious as to what it says. 

You watch as Esteban reaches into his suit pocket, pulling out a folded piece of paper and hands it to you. As you unfold the paper, your eyes widen when you read the words. 

“Oh my god! This is a quote from my favorite book, how did you know?” you look up at him, shock and surprise drawn all over your face. 

“What? It is? I genuinely didn’t know. I wrote it cause it’s from a book I read and I thought it was cute.”

You smile at his words, pocketing the paper for yourself. 

“Well, I guess I have to be honest too. I was the one who orchestrated our first meeting.”

“Huh?” Esteban lets out, jaw dropped. 

“I’ve seen the edits and such that fans tag me in, of you talking about me. I then went down a rabbit hole of videos and stalking your instagram. I thought you were cute and funny and I really wanted to meet you. So, when I found out Charles was already invited to the premiere, I messaged him on instagram, asking if he could bring you with him. He agreed and then I had to make sure you were in the right spot for our meeting, a spot that was the most secluded on the carpet, so we could have an actual conversation. I had my team and some of the crew members keep pushing you boys to different spots of the carpet until you went to where I wanted you guys. I also had them place you in the same theater room as me for the actual preview of the movie.” you confess, feeling your face heat at the confession. What if he thought you were a freak?

“You masterminded me.” was all he said. 

“What?” you question. 

“You masterminded me. You were the one playing chess while I was playing checkers. I was supposed to be the one to mastermind you!”

The both of you stand there in silence before absolutely cackling over the fact that you both tried so hard to get the others' attention. 

The chain reaction of countermoves assessed the equation of the two of you, so you couldn't lose. 

-=+=-

Liked by estebanocon, charlesleclerc, and 439,568 others

y/n such an enchanting night under the twinkling stars 🩷

Just wanted to say a quick thank you to the cast and crew who helped make all of this possible and to the fans for showing up and showing out! It was amazing meeting every single one of you and I can’t wait for you all to see the film 

You and I ended up in the same room, at the same time, because I’m a mastermind 😉

View all comments

User99 ehm, wtf is up with that last sentence?

Estebanocon was an amazing night and I’m very thankful for our meeting 😌

Charlesleclerc thank you y/n for inviting us, the film was wonderful (sorry about esteban btw)

↳User44 now charles… wdym when you apologize for esteban 🤨

Pierregasly how he pulled you, i have no clue

↳User01 WHAT?!

↳Pierregasly what 🧑‍🦯

[unreliablesnake]

All of the girls you loved before (Simon "Ghost" Riley x reader)

Summary: Simon is moving into your place, but since he's away on a mission, you offer to pack his stuff in boxes. Too bad you find things that belong to his exes.

Note: Based on this Taylor Swift song. / It's around 700 words. / If you want to know when I post new stuff, follow @unreliablesnakefics and hit the get notifications button. I don't have a taglist.

Warnings: none, it's fluff.

Simon spent most of his time away from home, so when you agreed to move in with him–or rather he would move into your place far from Manchester–he wasn't all that surprised that you offered to pack his things while he was deployed with the help of his sister-in-law. He thought it was sweet, something nice he would somehow have to pay back for later.

As you were packing, it was Beth who first stumbled upon an object in Simon's closet that she innocently assumed was yours: a sexy set of lingerie. But it wasn't yours, you had never owned anything in that color. You didn't say much, only said a few words and threw it into an empty box.

Soon the box was half full of things that belonged to other women. Clothes, underwear, makeup, other beauty products, handwritten notes, and pictures as well. They were all memories of a life Simon had already left behind before you came into the picture.

You could tell that Beth was walking on eggshells around you, probably thinking you were upset about that certain box. In a way, she was right. Who wouldn't be? It just makes you wonder if these are old things, or new ones he hid from you on purpose.

A few days later Simon returned and you met at his apartment so you could show him all of the boxes that would be shipped to your place the next few days. He was grateful for all of the things you had done for him, and once his eyes fell on a sad lonely box with a question mark written on its top in the corner of the living room, he couldn't help but wonder what that was.

“What's with that box?” he asked, pointing at it.

You gulped, at the bottom of your heart feeling stupid for being a little insecure about this. “Well, those are… I'm not sure if that's your stuff, but I packed it nonetheless.”

“Why? What's in there?” he asked, already walking over to the box to open it. He took out a photo first, then his forearm disappeared between the cardboard walls as he checked the rest of the items. “Oh, shit. I'm sorry, I thought I threw away everything,” Simon told you as he stood up and walked over to you.

“It's okay.”

“No, it's not. These belong to my exes and shouldn't be here at all.”

“Si, it's okay,” you assured him with a smile as you placed a hand on his upper arm. “I know you're over them. But they were a part of your life once, you can't just magically erase them.” With a confused look on his face, Simon studied your face with interest. “Unless these got into your apartment after we got together–”

“They were here sooner,” he was quick to interrupt you.

You smiled as you watched him for a few seconds before going on. “Those relationships didn't work out, and those women made you the one I love so much now. If anything, I'm grateful for them.”

Simon stepped closer, standing toe to toe as he looked down at you, his lips curling into a smile. “I love you too, sweetheart,” he told you, his hands reaching out to wrap around yours. “I'll still throw these away. They shouldn't be around us.”

“Look, if there's anything you would like to keep, like a photo or something, just go ahead,” you said, although you weren't that confident on the inside.

He probably noticed because he pulled you into a hug and kissed the top of your head. “I don't need these. I only want to see your stuff in our place,” he mumbled into your hair.

[goldfades]

will smith 🌱 37. "what are you listening to?" / "here, take an earbud." ?? 🫶

𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐝𝐬 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐚 𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐧, 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧 | wm⁶

♡ ─ word count | 854 words

♡ ─ warnings | mention of stress, but other than that, sweet sweet fluff!!!!!

♡ ─ ev's notes | i love this song so much, i just had to mention it lol. i hope you enjoyed!!

You sat in the library, quietly working on your assignment with your headphones in. Today was stressful, more than usual. It was the second semester and the workload was way more than you could handle, but you pushed through - you couldn't quit now. As you sat in the library, the soft hum of whispered conversations and the turning of pages enveloped you like a comforting blanket. Despite the stress, there was something soothing about being surrounded by books and the focused energy of other students.

The stress weighed heavily on your shoulders, but the determination to persevere fueled your focus. Occasionally, you glanced up from your work, observing the other students absorbed in their own work. Everyone seemed engrossed, each one battling their own challenges. You were glad you weren't alone in the struggle, it was comforting knowing others were suffering as much as you were.

You were listening to your study playlist but it was mostly Taylor Swift, to no one surprise. You loved Folklore and Evermore, they were so calming and you loved listening to them whilst studying.

You felt a tap on your shoulder and looked up to see your boyfriend, Will. He had two coffees in his hand and a bag, seemingly filled with some food. You smiled up at him.

"Can I join you?" Will's quiet voice filled the silence. You nodded and he pulled a chair next to you. "You've been studying for almost 4 hours, you know that right?"

"4 hours?" You repeated, it truly only felt like an hour - you were really engrossed in your work. Will's expression was one of concern as he observed your tired face.

"I got you some coffee and some food, I know you probably haven't had a snack in a while." Will smiled gently as he placed the coffee and the bag of snacks on the table in front of you. The aroma of freshly brewed coffee mingled with the scent of pastries, instantly rejuvenating your senses. He was right, you had only had breakfast and it was 4 pm right now, you were starving.

"Thanks, Will," you said, offering him a genuine smile as you took a sip of the coffee. The warmth spread through you, both from the beverage and the genuine care he had shown. You noticed a small note attached to one of the coffee cups, and as you unfolded it, you found a handwritten message: You're doing amazing.

Your heart swelled. He was always so thoughtful and he made sure you were alright, he was someone you needed. His presence reminded you that amidst the chaos of deadlines and exams, there were moments of quiet joy and companionship to be cherished.

"Thank you, Will," you murmured, your voice soft with appreciation with a smile on your lips.

He smiled, his eyes crinkling at the corners in response to your gratitude. "Anything for you," he replied, his tone gentle. "I know how hard you've been working, and I just want to make sure you're taking care of yourself. I'm proud of you, okay?"

You tried not to tear up, it had been awhile since someone had recognized your efforts. Will's words were like a balm to your weary heart, soothing the doubts and insecurities that often plagued your mind. His unwavering support was a beacon of light in the darkest of times, a constant reminder that you were not alone in your struggles.

"Thank you," you whispered, your voice trembling slightly with emotion. "I couldn't do this without you."

His hand found yours, his touch warm and reassuring. "You're stronger than you think," he said softly, his gaze unwavering. "And I'll always be here to remind you of that. Now, go ahead and finish up so we can go eat."

You nodded, a small smile playing on your lips as you wiped away the tears threatening to spill over. With a renewed sense of purpose, you turned back to your laptop, the weight of the assignments feeling just a bit lighter with his words echoing in your mind.

"What are you listening to?" Will spoke up again as you turned to him with a soft smile.

"Here, take an earbud."

"Ah, Taylor Swift. Not surprised." Will grinned as he took the headphone, putting it in his ear. "What song is this? Seven, right?"

"You studied your Taylor Swift well, Will." You smiled back.

He shrugged, "Yup, I did my homework. I like this song, by the way."

"Yeah, me too." You said, feeling a sense of warmth spreading through you at the shared moment of connection over music. It was moments like these, simple and unassuming, that made the challenges of school feel a little less daunting.

Sweet tea in the summer Cross your heart, won't tell no other And though I can't recall your face I still got love for you Your braids like a pattern Love you to the moon and to Saturn Passed down like folk songs The love lasts so long

"I love you." You spoke up again.

"To the moon and Saturn?"

You laughed and nodded. "To the moon and Saturn."

-> make sure to check out my navigation or masterlist if you enjoyed! any interaction is greatly appreciated! <-

thank you for reading all the way through, as always ♡

[gunnerfc]

❄️ WOSO FICMAS: Dec. 23 - Vivianne Miedema ❄️

Vivianne Miedema x Reader (Arsenal & Dutch) | WC: 702

Dec. 23 prompt - opening presents on christmas morning

-> all translations from google!

-> woso ficmas masterlist can be found here!

You felt the sunlight hit your face as you stirred in bed. You softly groaned as you stretched, rolling over to see Viv lying on her side, her arm propping her head up. You gave the forward a quick smile, still not fully awake.

“Goedemorgen lieverd (good morning, love).” Viv whispered, giving you a quick forehead kiss.

“Good morning,” you whispered back, sleep still evident in your voice.

“Vrolijk Kerstfeest (Merry Christmas).” you both said at the same time, laughing softly as you spoke together.

The reminder that it was in fact Christmas morning seemed to jump-start your body. You quickly sat up, doing one last stretch of your arms and back before jumping out of bed and making your way to the bedroom door.

“Nou, kom je niet? (well, aren’t you coming?)” your excitement lacing your words.

Viv laughed at how excited you were for presents, moving as slowly as possible from the bed to tease you. You rolled your eyes at her teasing, holding your hand out for her to take so you could lead the two of you to the living room.

The both of you had been secretive the whole month of December, wrapping presents for each other while the other was out not wanting to give anything away. You were bouncing with excitement, Viv thought it was because you finally got to see what she had gotten you for but it was really because you were excited to see her reaction to her gifts.

You two went back and forth opening gifts, some being things you had mentioned wanting, others being picked under the idea of thinking the other would like it. You both had the same idea and got each other joke gifts as well.

There were two gifts left, both being envelopes that were stuck in the tree so they wouldn’t get messed up under everything else. You grabbed both of them, setting the one that had your name written on it on the table, and handing Viv’s hers to open first.

As the forward opened the card, you were practically bouncing with excitement. You watched Viv’s face as she realized what her gift was.

“Are these tickets for Taylor Swift?” you could hear the shock in her voice.

Viv had tried so hard to get tickets to Taylor Swift’s The Ears Tour in London but had zero luck. You knew what it would mean to Viv to see Taylor in concert which made it so hard to not say anything when you got them, instead waiting to give them to her now.

“How did you even get these?!” Viv gasped.

“Resell! I was checking every day after the sale ended to see if anyone had put any back up!” you beamed at your girlfriend, proud of yourself for actually getting them.

Viv sat the card and printed screenshot of the ticket confirmation on the table and moved to pull you in for a tight hug, mumbling a small “thank you.” You pulled away to give her a quick peck to say ‘you're welcome.’

“Oké, jouw beurt. (okay, your turn.)” Viv said, reaching forward to pick up the envelope you had set down earlier.

With quick fingers, you pulled the card from the envelope, taking a second to read what was written on the front before opening it. Your eyes quickly scanned the handwritten note Viv had written, feeling your skin heat up at her loving words. You then took the folded piece of paper that was in the card and opened it. Your eyes grew in size seeing flight information for a vacation to Greece. You had been talking non-stop about wanting to visit and now you were going to after the Olympics next year when you had time off.

You quickly sat everything down and all but jumped into Viv’s arms. You whispered “thank you” each time you placed a quick peck on her lips. Your girlfriend laughed at your actions and wrapped her arms around you pulling you into a long hug.

The two of you spent the rest of the day cuddled up together, excitingly making plans for outfits for the concert and what you wanted to see and do while in Greece.

[paradiseismine]

Olivia Rodrigo headcanons

Pairing: Olivia Rodrigo x afab!reader

Warnings: lots of fluff and a tiny bit of spice towards the end (still sfw); wlw dynamic

Love note from Nina: ya girl Nina is bisexual af, just like Liv in this headcanon. Hope everyone is able to take something good off this post. I’ll still write for Finnie and other male celebrities/characters, just wanted to do some sapphic stuff on here as well. Enjoy 💕

Fluff 🎀

- Everyone knows it by now: Liv is a romantic girl. She loves handwritten notes, flowers and baking something special for her lover - and you’re getting all of it.

- When you met her, it was clear that there was some instant chemistry going on. She got a bit scared, at first, but melted into your arms soon after. You two were simply drawn to each other.

- If she borrows one of your coats or jackets, she’ll always leave small love notes in the pockets for you to find later. Liv adores the idea of you thinking of her and being constantly reminded of her love for you, specially because, due to her busy schedule, she can’t be by your side 24/7 (as much as she’d love to).

- Whenever she has some time off of touring/interviews, she’ll come over to your house and surprise you with a tray of baked goods she prepared for you. She already knows your favorites are her banana bread and her chocolate chip cookies.

- This girl takes cuddles very seriously: there has to be a nice blanket, some scented candles and dim lighting. Liv loves to run her fingers through your hair and caress your face gently.

- She’ll usually start humming or softly singing random love songs to you as well. Usually Taylor Swift songs, ‘cause you both love Taylor.

- She’ll clasp your ears in between her fingers and hold your face gently as she kisses you. Her kisses are usually slow and very sensual, she loves to take her time with you, to enjoy your company and intimacy as much as she can.

- Liv is always super delicate with you. She wasn’t very experienced with girls before she met you, so she always makes sure her nails are short and nicely filed, so you won’t feel any discomfort when she touches you. She wants you to feel nothing but pleasure and love when you two are together.

- Ear nibbles? Her specialty. Prepare to moan her name whilst shaking and squirming whenever she puts her plush lips to your ears. You’re usually so poised, Liv loves knowing her touch has such power over you.

- She’ll roam her hands in an agonizingly slow way along your sides, tracing your figure. Liv loves your body and wants you to feel beautiful and desired at all times.She loves you, you’re her princess and must be treated like such.

- She’s still figuring out a way to come out to her fans, so she can be more blatant about the fact that you’re her girlfriend; but it’ll happen soon, cause she simply can’t fight the urge to hold your hand/put her arm around your waist in public (and maybe steal a smooch here and there).

[zot3-flopped]

Two months prior to its release, would-be doyens of Swift’s Tortured Poets Department have taken its barbed track listing very literally, leading to intense, often nefarious speculation regarding Swift’s six-year relationship with the British actor Joe Alwyn, which seemingly ended in early 2023.

The album’s title, revealed onstage at the Grammy awards, was quickly linked to a December, 2022 interview with Alwyn and Paul Mescal in which they revealed that Andrew Scott started their group chat, the Tortured Man Club. (“It hasn’t had much use recently,” Alwyn said: you wonder if it’s undergone a recent revival.) Swift revealed the leading track list a day later: My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys, So Long, London, I Can Do It With a Broken Heart, The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived, to name a few, sending fans wild with speculation.

Swift, obviously, has every right to sing about her relationships however she wants to (no apologies to Eamonn Holmes). But in the absence of any music, some fans have spread baseless, dangerous and even libellous allegations about Alwyn’s conduct (which, for obvious reasons, I can’t repeat).

Last month, a brief fan-shot video of them dining in a New Orleans restaurant in December, 2022 was recirculated online with AI-doctored audio that made it sound as though Alwyn is saying “you don’t get to tell me about sad,” a line printed on the back of one of the new album’s four physical editions.

When Swift recently told a crowd that she was “lonely” when writing her 2020 album Folklore – some of which was co-written with Alwyn during the pandemic, a lonely time for most – fans took that as further confirmation of their theories. A live medley of three songs that all appear to reference cheating threw petrol on the fire.

Swift could make this stop. She is no stranger to airing her displeasure with the likes of Ticketmaster, Scooter Braun, Spotify and Apple Music, and, occasionally, politicians. Before she released Speak Now (Taylor’s Version) last year, she gave a veiled speech at one Eras tour date effectively asking fans not to go after John Mayer, whom she dated when she was 19 and he was 32 and is understood to be the subject of that album’s Dear John.

“I am not putting this album out so you should feel the need to defend me on the internet against someone you think I wrote a song about 14m years ago when I was 19,” she said in Minneapolis.

But for whatever reason – and obviously, no member of the public has any idea what transpired between her and Alwyn so far – this time she has opted to stay quiet.

Establishing a baseline for conduct is neither commercially risky nor unprecedented: just last week, Ariana Grande said, after the release of her post-divorce album Eternal Sunshine: “Anyone that is sending hateful messages to the people in my life based on your interpretation of this album is not supporting me and is absolutely doing the polar opposite of what I would ever encourage”.

It feels like the endgame of a cat-and-mouse act that’s gone too far. Swift’s gestures towards meaning have led every single thing she does to be considered a kind of marketing, a clue to be solved. It leaves a superstar who’s usually hot on her messaging open to misinterpretation: hints about her personal life are turned by some fans into witch-hunts for anyone perceived to have wronged her; her current silence on politics allows politicians to invoke her name, from the New South Wales police commissioner quoting Swift’s anti-haters lines while defending police to Joe Biden joking that the matter of her apparently much sought-after endorsement is “classified” on Late Night With Seth Meyers.

When Swift made a blandly neutral handwritten post encouraging US citizens to register to vote on Super Tuesday, some fans speculated that her unusual left-leaning handwriting was the real indication of her loyalties – suggesting they’re so starved of substance that they’re reading into empty messages because of this dynamic she has established. (The more likely explanation is the insane way she holds a pen.)

For Swift to only direct fans as to her wishes when it suits her, it weakens her status as a truth-teller. If the comparisons with Dickinson mean anything, she might remember that nothing in the world has as much power as a word feels like the endgame of a cat-and-mouse act that’s gone too far.

[gatzbright]

writing [love]; dream, a writer.

Dream: I like writing. I like writing poems; I like writing songs; I like writing everything. I like storytelling—I just like storytelling. Storytelling in general is fun. I do a lot of storytelling through, like, my videos, through my video editing ... that's my favourite part of writing.

Dream: So, it's [love is] special, you know? You can't really explain it. Um, you know, with your mum, your dad, your—your sisters, your brothers, your cousins, your—your friends that you've known since you were a kid. Your friends that you just met a year ago that you are absolutely in love with as a person.

Dream: 'Have you written stories as well as songs lately?' Yeah—I mean, well ... I feel like songwriting is very—it's like, you just take stories—like 'Roadtrip' was, like, essentially a poem, and a story, that was turned into a song. And I feel like that's with a lot of stuff. 'Mask' is the same; 'Mask' was a poem turned into a song.

Bird by Bird, Anne Lamott | Dream Subscriber Twitter Space April 30th, @/dreamwastaken | It's Been A Long Day, Spacey Jane | Dream's Tiktok 'love is scary', @/dreamwastakenwastaken | Photograph in the studio from Dream's Instagram post, @/dreamwastaken | The Story of Mary MacLane, Mary MacLane | Our Beautiful Life When It's Filled With Shrieks, Christopher Citro | Johnny Cash’s handwritten to-do list, 1969 | Tweeted screenshot from Dream's notes app, @/dreamwastaken | Anne Carson interview, 2016 | Dream and George on the Dream Panel at TwitchCon Las Vegas 2023, TwitchCon VOD | Tweeted screenshot from Dream's notes app, @/dreamwastaken | On Writing, Stephen King | A fan's Tiktok of Dream and George at emo nite, @/angstboycam | Dream explaining 'Spotlight' in the 'to whoever wants to hear' lyric booklet, Dream | Your Song, Elton John | Fan photos of Dream and George at Dream's tour

Dream's 'Kind Of Love' speech LA concert night two, @/milktea_grn | The Power Of Love, Frankie Goes To Hollywood | Fan photos of Dream and George at Dream's tour | You Are In Love (Taylor's Version), Taylor Swift | Dream explaining 'Paranoid' in the 'to whoever wants to hear' lyric booklet, Dream | Dream and George on the Dream Panel at TwitchCon Las Vegas 2023, TwitchCon VOD | Words, Gregory Alan Isakov | Dead Poets Society, dir. | Dream Subscriber Twitter Space April 30th, @/dreamwastaken | Sweet Nothing, Taylor Swift

Fan photo of George recording Dream at his concert | Addressable Thou, Chase Berggrun | Bright Star, dir. Jane Campion | George smiling at Dream in IRL DREAM TEAM IN MADRID, Sapnap VOD | Endymion, John Keats | Dream and George on set: Everest – Dream & Yung Gravy BEHIND THE SCENES, Dream Music | [brIght], E. E. Cummings | George and Dream in IRL DREAM TEAM IN MADRID, Sapnap VOD | Sand and Foam, Kahlil Gibran

[luellasplanet]

miss americana and the heartbreak prince. (aggie beever jones)

word count: 1.6k

based on taylor swift’s song miss americana and the heartbreak prince

in which a teenage romance doesn’t end the way it should

you know i adore you

i’m crazier for you, than i was at sixteen

“Happy three years mi bella!” You singsong as you happily walk into Aggie’s childhood bedroom — still ever as messy as if she lived there on a permanent basis.

“Mmm y/n/n I’m not done wrapping your gift! Go say hello to Annie in the meanwhile, I’ll meet you in ten.”

A small frown appears on your face as you push down any of the negative feelings that were slowly pushing their way up to the surface.

These feelings had been slowly eating up on you over the past couple months, but you thought it was not something to bother Aggie about. So you ignored all and any negative emotions you felt.

Ten minutes to wrap a gift seemed very unrealistic but you muttered a quiet, “oh okay..”

As you made your way into the older Beever-Jones’ room you forced a smile onto your face as you knocked on the door. “Hey Annie!” A bubbly and smiley façade on full display as you happily chatted away with the older girl.

Meanwhile when Aggie heard the doorbell ring, a few minutes prior, she quickly shut herself in the bathroom and frantically called Jorja, “shit shit shit! I forgot to buy her a present!”

On the other end of the phone the brunette was busy laughing at her friend’s stupidity, “this is not a laughing matter!” Aggie practically shouted while trying to think of a reasonable excuse.

“Mate I don’t think there’s going to be anything to give her in your bathroom…” Jorja, who was currently looking at the ceiling as Aggie haphazardly threw her phone down on the counter top, told Aggie trying to knock some common sense into her over the phone.

“Fuck it, I’ll just lie to her!” Not even uttering a goodbye to Jorja she ended the call before exiting the bathroom.

Lightly treading across the passage the forward made her way towards her older sister's bedroom. “Y/n/n, you in here?” She questioned while peeking her head into the organised bedroom — the differences between the two siblings were very very clear.

now i’m feeling hopeless

Looking up you were met with a look you knew from a mile away. Stress and worry was evident on her face. “You okay babe?” The blonde narrowly avoided your gaze while chewing on her bottom lip.

She indicated towards her room, not even needing to say a word for you to understand what she was asking of you. Quickly saying goodbye to the older girl before treading behind Aggie and into her room. “So um, as I was wrapping your present I realised that the most important bit of your gift isn’t here. So I can’t actually give you your gift yet until I get it...”

“Oh” was all you managed to say choosing to glance down at the floor instead of Aggie. Your brain was slowly working into overdrive as you listened to her lie straight to your face.

“You forgot didn’t you?”

Watching out of the corner of your eye you can see her shift her weight onto each foot repeatedly as she softly told you “I’m sorry.”

With a shake of your head and a sigh you placed the gift down on her desk, before leaving the blonde alone in her room.

aggie ❤️

Hey, I’m really sorry can we talk?

Please?

Seen 4 hours ago

Throwing her phone onto her bed the blonde internally cursed herself for forgetting such an important event in your relationship. Looking across her room she looked at the present that she had yet to open.

There was a note attached to the top of it that was obviously on top so that Aggie had to open it first. Internally arguing with herself for a moment before ending the silent argument as she grabbed the present off her desk and brought it onto the bed.

Removing the blue and white ribbon the note slide right into the blondes hands. With ease Aggie opened the envelope and took the handwritten note out.

Happy three years my girl!

I know we don’t always see eye

to eye on a lot of things, especially as of

late, but I wouldn’t have it any other

way as the arguments only make

us stronger as a couple.

Especially this year I think we’ve

both matured not just as individual people

but as a couple. We have managed to

work through our differences

and now know how to solve them

without making the other upset.

And I think that really shows how much

we’ve grown since little sixteen year old

me asked you out in our hotel room

at some random tournament we

were at.

I’m also extremely proud of the

things you’ve achieved and how

you’ve stuck with your choices and

decisions even when things seem

like they aren’t going to work out in your

favour.

You’ve also always supported me

and encouraged me to keep going

even when I want to give up and just

quit football. But we both know

I’d regret that insanely. So I

thank you immensely for sticking by

my side through it all.

Thank you for the best three

years of my life and I know the rest

will be equally as

amazing (or even better)

Love you forever and always Aggie xo

Dropping the note down onto her bed Aggie knows that she can’t lose you over her stupidity. Springing off her bed she quickly made her way out of her house and down the road to yours.

Knocking on your childhood home’s door she waited out there for about a moment until your mum opened the door “oh Aggie darling she isn’t here right now she’s at the park, but would you like a cup of tea or maybe a glass of water?”

Trust your mum to be nice to Aggie even if she had just shattered your heart into millions of pieces. Albeit your mum didn’t know that the two of you were arguing but the sour mood you came home with was a slight indication that something was wrong.

“Oh no, it’s okay don’t worry, but thank you though!”

Speed walking towards the park, Aggie felt her phone vibrate in her pocket, maintaining a steady pace and grabbing the phone your name had appeared on the screen. The message read “sorry, just want to be alone right now x”

Rolling her eyes the blonde ignored your request as she walked towards your figure. She should’ve known that when you’re upset you take out your anger on football.

“Y/n/n,” she started before being interrupted by you.

“Didn’t you see my message?” You asked not even bothering to turn around as you rocketed one of the balls into the back of the net.

The blonde watched as you tirelessly ran up to the footballs and shot them into the net one after another. When you paused to catch your breath she took it as the perfect opportunity to speak to you “I did, but like you said in your note we work together to sort out our problems and don’t upset one another in the process.”

You cursed under your breath before turning around to face her, she slightly towered over you even though she was standing a little bit away from you.

“We don’t upset one another in the process… it’s a bit late for that isn’t it?” You question with a roll of your eyes.

Assuming that the silence that followed your statement meant that you were free to go collect the footballs from the goal, but you were mistaken. “No you don’t just get to walk away when it pleases you!”

Your face told her what your mouth didn’t as you stared at her with a slight frown and scrunched up eyebrows. “Can we please just talk about this like adults?” Her tone was almost pleading as she asked.

Pointing towards the bench she followed behind you as you sat down, not bothering to look in her direction. The silence was deafening, neither of you wanted to speak first. After about a minute of the both of you gathering your thoughts, you broke the silence.

“I think, maybe, we just… need to take a break from one another. Figure out where we are in our own lives before figuring out where we are in our relationship.” You felt as if you were making the correct decision but as you looked over to Aggie — you had to rethink what you had said.

She was sitting an awkward distance away from you, almost as if she was afraid to sit in close proximity to you.

Her gaze that was once on the scenery infront of you two was now on your face as hee eyes scanned your features. “So that’s it? You’re just giving up on us?” You could see her eyes clouding over and you had to resist the urge to reach out and grab her hand.

“Babe — I mean… Aggie, I’m not giving up on us. I promise, we just need some time apart I think.” With that you stood up, giving her shoulder a little squeeze as you walked past her. Quickly shoving the footballs into their bag and off you went back home.

All while Aggie sat emotionless on the rotting bench watching as a huge part of her life walked away with such ease. And she felt like she didn’t do anything to stop it from happening.

The walk home was miserable, you all but barely managed to make it into your front garden before bursting into tears.

You were sure that any of your neighbours walking by would’ve thought you were insane, but someone who had been a massive role in your life was gone in just one conversation.

[macademiastudies]

November 15th Journal Song of the day - Illicit Affairs (Taylor Swift)

It's been getting too cold to go out and work/study, so I've been making a cozier home office space. It wasn't too bad yesterday, so I went downtown and did anything I could there. Work has been unbelievably busy, to the point where I'm working at 1 AM despite having a 9-5. I wanted to feel needed at work- I got what I wanted and here we are now. I haven't been able to even attempt any extra studying, but things should slow down for a bit so I'm back at it. To-do: Habit 1: Studying 🦉Plan how to re-create my current portfolio 🦉Data Analysis Assignment Unit 3 🦉Data Analysis 5.1 🦉Type out more handwritten notes 🦉Python Coursera Final Project 🦉Python CS50 Lect 1 Projects Habit 2: Self-care 🕯️30-minute home workout 🕯️A bottle of water 🕯️Scrapbook a page Habit 4: Reading 📰100 pages of the 5 AM Club (Robin Sharma) 📰Ch 1 of Java script book Habit 5: Language Learning 🏛️Italian level 1

[the-nameless-poet]

Solace

Fred Weasley

Summery : Hazel Lily Potter comforting Fred Weasley after his elder brother's death

Warning : Sobbing angst 💖

Don't want no other shade of blue but you.

No other sadness in this world would do

- Taylor Swift

Hazel

I brushed my hair out of my face as I stared at myself in the mirror. The reflection showed a person I barely knew. She stared right back at me, making me sink low in my own skin. It showed me a woman who had lost her childhood to something beyond fairness. The innocence that had once laid within her hazel eyes was replaced by a cold, wretched stare as if she could read my darkest secrets. The furrow of her eyebrows made her look a little more intimidating. But I knew, inside all of that, was a scared little girl, who got dragged into the wars she denied. Scars scattered all over her silhouette, telling a story that I had lived.

A story that was tragic. It was haunted. Haunted by the screams of innocents and the screams of the stolen virtue. Haunted by the tragic tale of liberty and the horror of bloodthirsty, prejudiced brutes. It was haunted by the purloined childhood of innocent youth, forced to mature, Screams of every heart and body for mercy, Tears of every patriarch to spare his kin of cruelty, fight of every mother to save her child, the sorrow of every lover who had to watch each other being pummeled to death. Haunted by the unforgivable curse that led the fights, screams of torture, sorrow, tragedy, and vulnerability. I could hear them all as clear as the day I had fought for the world. The casting of spells that emerged a light that left me blinded and the screams of terror that made my bones shiver. The cries of the loss of a loved one. It was all audible just as clear; as I traced a scar that carved itself permanently on my collarbone.

I gasped out loud and turned my head at the knock that pulled me out of my daze.

"Come in." I turned back towards the mirror as I stared at the scar that was laying on my forehead right above my right eyebrow. I saw my brother's reflection as he stared back at me through the mirror.

"It's time to go, Haze." The softness in his voice was agonizing.

"Yeah." I whispered back. I took one final look at myself in the mirror and walked out of my room. Harry following right after me.

We walked out of our prents' house at Godric's Hollow, and walked in an empty alley and apparated to a graveyard.

We stepped forward as we saw the Weasley family standing together. Each one trying to hold back their tears to comfort the other. We both took a seat as the memorial service started. Bill Weasley, the eldest son had given a beautiful eulogy for his younger brother.

As the sun peaked slightly above the horizon for the last time that day, It was time to bid our last goodbyes to one of the member of Weasley family. A family who had treated me and my brother as their own. Harry and I never had a family. Neither knew what it was nor knew what it meant till we met the Weasleys. The love they hold is pure, rich and authentic in a way that could make an orphan feel what family could be like. What family should be like. I will forever be grateful for having the opportunity to get to know this family. And to get to experience their love. The nurturing feeling that I was robbed off of was gifted to me by Molly, a mother who had limitless love for her children and the ones she took under her protective wings of motherly love.

And standing here, watching as she gets stripped down a child was making my heart churn in agony. Tears streaming down her once moon like glowing face as she buries one of her children six feet deep. I could never comprehend the hurt and agony that she must've been feeling.

Harry and I stepped forward to give our last goodbyes and to give our condolences to the Weasleys. Harry and I had brought some daisies.

We both put them down on the gravestone of Percy Ignatius Weasley. I had a little handwritten note that I laid down on his grave. We moved forward to give our condolences to our only existing family.

Aurther was the first one I hugged. I hugged him tightly. He had given me the fatherly love that I had craved for years. He hugged me back with same force, his eyes flowing tears freely as he sobbed. And I hugged him tighter, if it was possible.

"How are you doing, my love?" He pulled back slightly and pushed back some of my hair from my face and asked with tremble in his voice. I wiped the tears off his cheeks,

"I've been alright. Don't worry about me much, Arthur. How have you been?" I asked and my eyes started watering,

"Feels like I've been through hell." He said and hugged me back, I felt Molly's hand rubbing my back, that's when I realized that I was trembling with unshed tears and dumbed downed sobs.

I turned around and hugged Molly. I needed her right now. I needed her the most. But the others needed her more than I did. I felt my dress getting soaked as she broke down in my arms.

"Shh, hey, Molls don't cry. I can not understand what you're going through right now, but I promise you I'm right here, I'm with you and I'm not going anywhere. You're a proud mum of a hero." I gently said to her as she wrecked with sobs. Tears were flowing down my cheek freely now.

I pulled back a little and wiped her eyes. "Come on, Molls. You're the bravest of us all." She cupped my face in her hands and gave me a broken smile.

"Now, first of all, tell me. Tell me when are you coming back to live with us? I need you in the house, Haze. We all do. Please come back, both of you. You'll come back, yeah? Oh, And don't forget to put ointments on your injuries, darling." She said, pleading. Keeping her tears at bay.

"After two weeks. Harry and I are coming after two weeks. I promise I'll try to remember." I held her hand that was on my cheek.

"Okay." She said with a smile and lovingly patted my cheeks.

Ginny was standing beside Molly. She looked like she had been crying for weeks. I enveloped her in a hug. She was like a little sister to me. My bestfriend, my twin flame, my partner in crime, my everything.

"Awh, my baby." I hugged her tightly and let her grieve on my shoulder. She looked weak and tired. She was in no condition to talk.

"It's all gonna be okay. I promise." I whispered to her and I ran my fingers through her hair gently. She simply tightened her hold around my waist let out silent tears. She let go of me after a while and went back to being held by Harry. I watched as he gently kissed her forehead repeatedly in hopes to comfort her.

Georgie was standing right beside her and without any hesitation he pulled me in for a hug. He wasn't crying, no. He was trying to hold himself together to provide somewhat comfort to his family.

"How're you doing, little dwarf?" He asked with a brotherly smile.

"I'm fine. How've you been holdin' up Georgie?" I asked looking up at him. He wiped my tears away and kissed my forehead.

"Eh..." He shrugged his shoulders. He pulled me back into his embrace for one more time and then let go of me.

And instantly I was pulled into another embrace. A feeling of warmth spread all over my body as the pair of familiar arms wrapped themselves around me and pulled me in close. My head pressed up against his chest as I listened to the rhythmic beating of his heart. In this moment I felt complete. Soaking in all his love and affection as he embraced me in his solace. I never wanted to let go. His arms felt too comfortable to. I hugged him back just as fiercely. I felt all of my worries drifting away as I let myself bathe in the mellowness of his solace. Not letting myself lose in him, I pulled back slightly, looking up at him.

His sapphire eyes reflected the soul of a broken boy, which once held the happiness of the whole world. The gleam in them fading away as he smiled down at me. I wanted to catch it in a jar and protect it with my life. His smile was broken, yet it could light up the whole world. Guilt struck on his face as if it had latched itself on his existence.

It was Freddie. My Freddie.

"Hey, little darlin'. Got your head all banged up, have you?" He said with a light chuckle. I offered him a small glimpse of smile.

"C'mere." He pulled me back in his warmth and kissed the scar on my forehead.

He pulled away and I looked around to find Ron and Harry getting far away from the crowd. Ron had comforted us both thousands of times. It was Harry's turn to give him his shoulder to cry on. Bill and Charlie were standing far away. Saddened by the fact that the boy they saw growing up was lying lifeless, underneath the very soil they were standing on. They gave me a little wave of acknowledgement. Which I returned with a saddened smile.

"You wanna get away from here for a bit, Haze?" Freddie asked and I nodded my head without hesitation. I knew he needed to get away from here. I knew the moment I saw his face, he wanted to cry, sob till his voice gave up on him.

I took his outstretched hand in mine and looked up at his prominent face,

"That would be nice." I whispered, feeling if I spoke loudly the beauty and the tragidy of this moment would die.

He held my hand tightly in his, intertwining our fingers, as he led me far from the aura of grief and sadness.

He stopped near the furthest tree. It was a large oak tree. All alone, standing tall in all its glory. Providing shade to the grievance of people. He sat down, hidden away from all the prying eyes.

He pulled me down to sit beside him. My legs tangled on top of his. The moment was soft, almost fragile. If put under too much pressure might break into millions of scattered pieces. Our hands still intertwined as he drew circles on the back of my hand. I looked around, the light breeze of evening making the leaves rustle. The slight chatter of grievance could be heard in distance.

Graveyards were strange. They held this tragic peacefulness in them that was beyond comprehension. As I looked around, the gravestones shone with last rays of sun light. I wondered how each and every grave held a person that once made memories in this world. Some sad and some filled with happiness. The sudden realisation of existence and it's end came, sending shivers down my spine.

I heard a light sniffle. And looked at the boy sitting beside me. His face scrunches up in agony as it lit up with the redness left behind by the setting sun. His tears now freely flowing down his cheeks. The water droplets, so delicate, that they can remind one of the morning dew drop laying on the flower petals.

Even in agony, his face looked like it was carved up by the gods in daze of serinity. His eyes, Pools of sapphire that held too many emotions at the same time. His lips, pained by the caged sobs. His eyes glistened with tears that haunted the boy's dreams. His head leaned against the dark oak tree, contrasting his red strands of softness.

Even in his moment of vulnerability, to me this boy was nothing but beautiful. I took my hand back and straddled him, and took the trembling boy in my arms. He tightly held onto my waist, and hid his face in my chest as his body quivered with his vanquished sobs. His lips let out beaten apologies to his deceased brother. His voice horace and broken. His eyes shone with guilt and regret. And all I wanted to do in that moment was steal away all his sorrows, his thoughts of not being deserving of life.

But I didn't have it all in my hands. It wasn't upto me. So I just stayed there on my knees. Holding him close to my heart in hopes that he'll know how much he is loved by me. I caressed his hair as he broke down completely in my arms, not holding a sheer amount of his grief back.

"It was me, who was supposed to die. Why the fuck did he have to jump in?" He sobbed out. "Haze, it was me. I killed him. He's dead because of me." He cried out.

"Freddie, don't say that. Do not. Don't disrespect your brother's love and sacrifice like that. He loved you, honey. Don't be like that and let his love go to waste. He was brave. And that bravery came from you." I cupped his face in my hand and made him look up in my eyes. His eyes red from all the tears.

"I am the worst brother." He spoke in a broken whisper. I shook my head in disagreement.

"No. You've been the best brother to your siblings their whole life. Do you know how much Ron, Ginny, George, Billy, Charlie and Percy love you? How much I love you. I guess it was Percy's turn to be the best older brother for you, sweetheart. He just wanted to return the love you had given him, his whole life." I said as he looked up at me. His eyes shone with tears like a broken child's.

"But I was always mean to him." He whispered.

"Doesn't mean you didn't love him. Sometimes, we are mean to people we love. Yeah? Be proud of your brother's courage, Freddie. Be proud. He'd like that."

He nodded his head in defeat and leaned his head back on the tree. He sighed lightly, his hands still snaked around my waist, keeping me in place. He looked back at me. His gaze flickered from the scar on my forehead to the one on collarbone.

He gently grazed the scar with the pad of his thumb and let out another sigh. "you've got a scar here." He stated. "These aren't the only scars I've got." I whispered and stared straight in his eyes. "Tell me about it." He let out a sarcastic scoff. He pulled me closer to him making me sit on his lap. He gently pressed a kiss to my scar on the collarbone, making sure not to hurt me. And hid his face in my chest again. Holding me tight against his body.

He inhaled a large breath and exhaled with exhaustion as his head rested against my heart. I gently played with his hair and soaked the gentle moment of affection in. I kissed the top of his head and he nuzzled in more.

Call me selfish and twisted but the way he broke down in my arms made me feel complete.

We heard footsteps coming towards our direction. Fred quickly wiped his tears off, and took a deep breath in attempt to calm himself down. I got off of his lap and sat down beside him.

It was Ron, Harry and Hermione.

"We were looking for you both." Hermione spoke.

"Uh...yeah. I just wanted to um-clear my mind, so I dragged Fred here with me. Sorry." Fred gave me a grateful look.

"Yeah, no need to apologise. I just wanted to meet you. Sorry, I ran away with Harry for a while. Just wanted to clear my head." Ron spoke apologetically as he sat down beside me.

"Don't fuss about it." I hugged him tightly and we held onto each other for a while and then let go.

I felt Fred stand up, and I looked at him questioning.

"I think I should go. Mum must be looking for me. It was nice catching up, Haze. Bye. I'll meet you at the burrow." He said and left without any other word.

Harry, Hermione, Ron and I talked for a while and then we parted ways. We bid goodbye to the Weasley's and apparated away.

Harry and I landed in the same alley as before and walked towards the house.

"I saw you. You and Fred I mean. At the graveyard. Is there something going on?" Harry asked without looking at me.

"He needed a shoulder to cry on and I simply helped him with his grief." I said looking straight ahead as we entered the house. Harry locked the door behind.

"It looked bit too cozy for a shoulder to cry on." He mumbled.

"Harry don't speak about things that you don't have a single idea of. And since when did you start to care?" I spoke loudly.

"What is that supposed to mean?" He asked, his eyebrows furrowed.

"I guess it's time to address the elephant in the room. Harry, I am talking about the fact that you thought sacrificing yourself would win you a war." I spoke with no trace of emotion on my face. I wore a facade of a brave woman but inside I was trembling with fear. Fear of losing the war, losing my brother, losing everyone that I loved.

"Hazel, that happened a whole week ago. Let it go. What matters is that I didn't die. And I'm right here." He said trying to embrace me but I pushed him back, my facade breaking.

"What matters is that you didn't die!? Are serious right now, Harry? The fuck is wrong with you!? What matters is that, Harry, you didn't think once what would've happened to me even if we had won. I would've won a war without you Harry! Even though we won the war, we've been to thousands of funeral in last few days! And the thought of one of them being yours kills me! I've lost too much! I can't handle it anymore!" I yelled at him.

"What's that supposed to mean?! I've lost as many people as you have, Hazel! I've lost them too! You're not the only one!" He yelled back. His eyes full of rage and tears alike mine.

"YEAH, AND IF YOU'D HAVE DIED I WOULD'VE LOST ONE MORE! SO FUCK OFF!" I screamed at him and ran upstairs to my room and locked myself in. I slid down the wall of my room and brought my knees to my chest as I cried.

I heard Harry knocking, more like banging the door.

"Haze! Haze! Come on. Open the door. Please! I am sorry. I swear. But in that moment all I could think about was saving you. He wouldn't have killed you if he already had me. I couldn't have been able to live with the regret of not saving you while I had the chance. Haze, please open the door, for me. Please." His voice cracked at the end. I unlocked the door with my wand and he stepped in.

He looked at my broken state and ran to me and took me in his protective embrace. He wiped the tears off my cheeks and kissed my forehead and held me close as we cried. Cried for all the years of torture that the Dursely's brought in. Cried for our parents. Cried for the years of our childhood wasted after a cruel man. Cried for the way everyone put their blind faith on us and sacrificed themselves. Cried for the fear of losing the war after winning all the battles. Cried for Sirius, Remus and Dora. Cried for the Weasleys. Cried for every family that lost their loved ones because of a narrow mentality of a sociopath.

Cried till our lungs gave out and the exhaustion took over as we both fell asleep in each other's embrace.

A/N : Tell me in the comments if you want a fluffy part 2 🪐🤍

[pinkheart22]

MIDNIGHTS MANIFEST x TTPD

In the context of library science, a manuscript is defined as any hand-written item in the collections of a library or an archive. For example, a library's collection of hand-written letters or diaries is considered a manuscript collection.

Taylor writes handwritten notes. Taylor keeps diaries. This is her collection.

In Cornelia Street, she says "We were a fresh page on the desk Filling in the blanks as we go."

This album comes from the Desk of Taylor Swift and in Lavender Haze she wants to "get it off her chest, and get it off her desk."

From Taylor's tiktok Calendar of Events for Midnights release week it says "MANIFEST" underneath "Taylor Swift Midnights".(see photo below) I think this is referring to that The Midnights album IS the Manifest.

Manifest can mean : be evidence of; to prove. // show (a quality or feeling) by one's acts. // clear or obvious to the eye or mind. // (of an ailment) become apparent through the appearance of symptoms. // (of a ghost or spirit) appear. // to manifest something into existence.

This fits with the album Midnights and the release of TTPD afterwards.

Lets look into these meanings in relation to Midnights and TTPD and The Manuscript

to be evidence of - Midnights album shows evidence of whats to lead up to in TTPD. In Hits different Taylor says " I find the artifacts" "I trace the evidence, make it make some sense" It says "Artifacts" on each file/bonus track released so far for TTPD.

show a feeling of one acts - Midnights tells the feelings the actions of both her and her lover had on each other.

clear or obvious - its become clear in Midnights that he is losing her. She learns in Bejeweled when she decides to reclaim the land. I think Hits Different and You're Losing Me sum up the events of the whole album.

an ailment of symptoms - my heart wont start anymore- youre losing me // I wanted that pain, midnight rain // Sadness became my whole sky, bejeweled, // It only hurts this much right now, labyrinth// my sadness is contagious, hits different // etc. etc.

of a ghost or spirit - All of the people I've ghosted stand there in the room, anti-hero & I used to switch out these Kens, I'd just ghost, hits different - the TTPD album color of THE MANUSCRIPT is Ghosted White

you could also say Manifest can mean to think about something often and with focus until you receive it. It's the idea that if you want something, you can mentally attend to it and will it into existence.

In Midnights she wants to stay in that "Lavender Haze", manifesting to stay there for as long as she can. "I just wanna stay in that lavender haze" She also manifests in "PARIS" she sings "I wanna brainwash you Into loving me forever" then "Let the only flashing lights be the tower at midnight In my mind"

The flashing lights could be in reference to when there is warning signs they flash at you, but she doesnt want to see them, shes trying to ignore them.

She stares at the ceiling in LAVENDER HAZE and She draws a map on her bedroom ceiling in PARIS which connects the two songs.

bonus thought: In DEAR READER she says "Dear reader Get out your map, pick somewhere and just run" - She's realized that she shouldn't draw a map on the bed room ceiling but get out a real map.

Basically what I'm getting at is that this whole time Midnights has been a Manifest of whats to come in TTPD. She has been keeping TTPD a secret for 2 years, and wrote/recorded You're Losing Me in 2021 which would line up both albums simultaneously.

It seems to be a sister album like folklore and evermore are to each other.

This is just my theory. I do not claim to know anything about Taylor and her relationships. This is purely an opinion and observation from her album Midnights and little information about TTPD

Posted March 1 2024

@taylorswift @taylornation

[bi-bard]

As It Is Songs That Would Describe a Relationship with Kaz Brekker - Kaz Brekker Imagine [Shadow & Bone]

Title: As It Is Songs That Would Describe a Relationship with Kaz Brekker

Pairing: Kaz Brekker X Reader

Word Count: 2,608 words

Warning(s): touch aversion, mentions of nightmares/past trauma

Author's Note: Here's a cute little fact: I write for a lot of Taylor Swift and Hozier and dodie and stuff, but As It Is is my favorite band of all time. I hold their music very close to my heart. I could spend hours talking about how much I love their music.

**Not intentionally written in chronological order**

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The Handwritten Letter

I need you when I'm bruised and broken It's all that keeps me here and hoping I'm tangled in your mind unwoven I need you when I'm bruised I need you when I'm broken

Ka would never accept that someone helped him for the sake of helping him. In his eyes, everyone had another agenda of some kind. Money, power, take your pick. That belief always made him cold and distant. I had long accepted that he would never admit to having someone around merely for the sake of having them around.

That would be a liability. He would never risk giving his enemies such an easy way to have power over him.

Maybe "never" was a strong word.

I was sitting at my small, listening to the sound of pencil scratching paper, only interrupted by pauses to either pull thoughts in order, make corrections, or flip to the next page. I would never thank Jesper enough for getting me a small leather-bound journal. He introduced me to the beautiful world of writing that I had never known before.

I must've been too focused on my scribbling to notice the world around me.

Kaz had to clear his throat for me to know that he had gotten into my apartment. I turned around in my seat so I could look at him.

"Hey," I said. I would have been worried about him getting in, but I was the one who gave him a key. "Sorry, I was writing. Didn't hear you come in."

"You should be resting." he didn't acknowledge my statement. "You hit your head. You need to be in bed."

He said it like a boss instructing an employee, but we both knew that there was more to it than that. Well, I liked to believe that.

"I'm fine," I insisted.

"You were unconscious," he argued.

"And now, I'm not-"

"Jesper had to carry you here!" he cut me off. "You could have easily died! I- We almost lost you. Now, get back into bed."

"Alright, alright," I mumbled. "Never knew that you cared so much."

He didn't respond to that. He merely watched as I climbed under my covers.

"I get it, you need to make sure that all of your tools are in working condition," I added, curling into my pillow.

There was this long pause.

Neither one of us moved. I was curled under my thin covers. He stood in the middle of my room. I couldn't see him. I wondered what his eyes were focused on. Was it just me or was it the mess around my home? Could he picture me living in my space or was my existence as much of an enigma to him as his was to me?

"I lied to you."

The quiet confession made me slowly push myself up. I held myself up on my hands, allowing my blanket to fall onto my lap. He was looking away from me. His eyes were fixed to my journal, staring at the words that I had scrawled into the paper before his visit.

"What do you mean," I asked.

The page sitting open was one that I should have been embarrassed by. Lines constructed to reflect a longing that I had only known with Kaz. Poetry about suffocating, yearning, burning, and begging. All of it boiled down to one thing: I needed Kaz as much as I needed air or water or food.

I should've been humiliated. But I wasn't. Because I knew that he had to be aware of my feelings. How could he not be when it so clearly filled my eyes when I looked at him?

"Kaz-"

"You were never merely a tool," he said, looking at me.

"Then what am I?" I muttered. "To you?"

He took a deep breath. When his eyes turned away from me again, it felt like my heart jumped into my throat. I just needed him to say something. Say what I had been desperate to hear for as long as I had known him.

"Kaz, please," I pulled myself over to the end of the bed, sitting on my knees. "Tell me."

"I care for you," he said. "More than I should. More than I want to."

He walked over, stopping right in front of me.

"I need to know that you're okay," he continued. "Always. I feel a need to be around you and protect you. You make me feel a safety that I haven't felt in years. If you were gone, I don't know what I would do. You... You are..."

He trailed off, looking as if the words were truly getting stuck in his throat. As if forcing out another word would bring him pain. I didn't want to be the source of that. He had already said so much more than I had ever wished for.

He looked down. I did the same. His hand was resting on my bedframe, just next to mine. I grinned and looked back at him.

"I... I'm not good at things like this," he mumbled.

"It's okay," I promised. "I'm patient."

He looked back at me. A grin started forming on his lips.

I felt safe calling it a good start.

Winter's Weather

Please see in me what I can’t see, I’m begging Please won’t you be the light I need so desperately

Physical affection was not something Kaz was used to.

He had made that abundantly clear to me.

I never pushed him. Or I never tried to. I let him take the lead most days, and if I ever did take the lead, then I would have no complaints if he pulled away. It was all meant to be understanding. Kindness.

It worked well for us. Even without any kind of touching, Kaz made it clear to me that I was not the same as everyone else. I caught his smiles. He would walk closer to me. I had free access to his office. He would mumble things to me that the others weren't meant to hear.

He had quiet ways of showing me that I meant so much to him.

I thought we were happy that way. For the time being, at least.

And then, Kaz showed me that maybe that wasn't the case.

He was standing by his mirror, tending to something. I was sitting on the chair opposite his desk, scanning my eyes over the pages of a book.

It took me a few moments to realize that he had moved to stand in the archway and watch me quietly. I grinned at him.

"You're staring, Brekker," I teased.

There was something both flattering and nerve-wracking about being the center of Kaz's attention. I had never been looked at with as much intensity as he looked at me. It felt as if he could stare into my soul as easily as he breathed. As if he knew every secret that I could ever think of keeping from him. It made my heart speed up and my face turn warm.

"Something's on your mind," I said, placing the book on his desk. "I can see it."

His eyes seemed to scan me for a moment longer before he spoke, "Am I wasting your time?"

"Never," I replied instantly. It was true. I wouldn't take back a moment that I spent with him. Ever. "Why are you asking?"

"Just something that I saw today," he tried to wave off the entire interaction.

I stood from my seat. I walked over to the archway, standing next to him in the entrance. "What is it, Kaz?"

"Have I ever once shown you that I care for you," he asked. "Ever?"

"Yes," I nodded.

"When?"

"Every day," I explained. "When you try to keep me safe or tell me that Inej brought me a new book or murmur something in my ear. You show me, Kaz. In your own special way. Please believe me when I say that I know it."

"You deserve more than this," he muttered. "You deserve a man who can touch you. A man that doesn't let his weakness stop him from being yours-"

"Stop it, Kaz," I cut him off. "I don't need more than what I have. I will decide what I deserve. It took me ages to convince myself that I deserved you. There isn't something better than you. Not for me. You are everything. The center of my world; the sky, the ground, and everything in between. I don't need to touch you or have you touch me to convince me."

He didn't respond.

Instead, he looked down for a moment. I took a deep breath, assuming that this was a losing fight. I was ready to let it go for the night, but Kaz stopped me before I could.

"I want you to touch me."

It was like the room filled with smoke. Tension so thick that I could hardly breathe. My mind couldn't process the sentence for a moment, and once it did, it didn't stop playing it over and over and over.

"Are you sure," I asked.

"Yes," he replied.

"You don't have to-"

"I want you to," he stopped me.

"Okay," I nodded. "Anything in particular."

He took a deep breath. "No."

I took a moment to study his face. "I... I'm going to just reach up and touch your face-"

"I'm not a scared dog."

"Sorry," I mumbled.

I slowly lifted my hand up and went to cup his cheek.

I saw him tense as soon as my hand touched his face. His breathing picked up and his eyes closed. I had never craved to be able to read someone's mind quite like I did then. Maybe then, I could offer him some peace through it.

I felt guilt sitting in my stomach. I felt like I was bringing him pain. As if my hand had been covered in small blades, each cutting into his skin one by one.

The guilt only grew as I recognized the warmth in my heart. I loved Kaz. I never doubted that. Being able to touch him, to show just one ounce of the love I held was a blessing. But I was feeling this love while he was in pain. I couldn't inflict that on him.

I went to move my hand away, unable to handle seeing him like this. "Kaz-"

"Don't," he instructed, opening his eyes to look at me. "Please."

It felt like he was seeing me. Not some ghost from a nightmare that he wouldn't explain to me. Some remnant of a life he wanted to bury so desperately that I had seen haunt him far too often.

I barely noticed that Kaz matched his breathing with mine.

Maybe he didn't mean to. Maybe he was just trying to calm himself down and it was the best choice he had.

"Will you kiss me," he asked quietly.

I paused for a moment. "Are you... Are you sure?"

"Yes."

I stepped forward and grinned at him nervously.

I leaned in and pressed my lips to his.

It was only for a few seconds. A few seconds of my lips barely touching his. I wanted to be gentle and careful, but I had this pull in my chest to just show him how much I adored him. But regardless of what I wanted, I leaned back, pulling my hand back with it.

We both stood there for a few moments before I finally spoke up, "Are you alright?"

Kaz let out a heavy breath before looking at me again. "Yes. I'm alright."

I felt a smile stretch across my face.

It was a perfect enough moment for me.

The Truth I'll Never Tell

And I could tell you how I've really been But would you even want to know

I had somewhat expected Kaz to pull away after his final fight with Pekka Rollins.

It was a taxing venture. Physically, mentally, and emotionally. I could see it. On his face, in his shoulder, in the way he spoke. I just wanted to be there for him, but I felt the same exhaustion that he did.

I understood his desire to be alone after it had all gone down.

However, there's a distinct difference between needing time alone to regroup after an intense experience and unhealthy isolation.

Maybe my urge to show up at his office that night were selfish than I would admit to. Maybe it was more of an attempt to soothe myself than him. Even if he shoved me away, then I could say that I tried and live without the guilt of not reaching out to him when he may have needed me.

Regardless of whatever subconscious reason there may have been, I went to Kaz's office.

He was sitting at his desk, clearly lost in thought in some way.

I walked over to stand next to the desk, taking a moment to scan my eyes across the side of his face. His wounds from his last meeting with Pekka were healing quite nicely, but they were still noticeable. And they broke my heart.

"You're staring," He mumbled, looking over at me.

I blinked a few times. "Sorry. I wanted to check on you."

"Why?"

"Because you're my partner and I care for you," I explained. "You've been avoiding me, Kaz."

He pulled his eyes away from me, instead choosing to focus on something on his desk.

"I understand that a lot has happened," I continued. "And I have no interest in forcing you to say or do anything, but I need you to know that I want to listen. I want to know what's going on-"

"What difference would that make exactly," he asked, cutting me off.

"Because bottling up your emotions all the time isn't healthy," I shrugged. "You deserve to have someone to talk to, Kaz."

"You wouldn't understand."

"Then, explain it."

There was a long pause. Tense. I watched Kaz's jaw clench for a moment. I crossed my arms over my chest. I refused to leave him. Not like this.

"I thought that they'd stop," he muttered.

I furrowed my eyebrows.

"The nightmares. The flashbacks. I thought that getting rid of Pekka Rollins would get rid of them."

"And they didn't."

"No," he whispered.

"I... I'm sorry."

He closed his eyes. He looked embarrassed. He never liked pity. I should have shown that my attempts at empathy may look very similar in his eyes. And the worst part was that I didn't know how to prove him wrong.

"Kaz," I mumbled, going to take a knee in front of him so our eyes would be closer to level when he eventually turned to me. "I... I can't fix what's already happened. I can't. Believe me, there is nothing more I want than to be able to offer you some kind of clean slate. But I... I can support you. If you let me."

I heard a sigh escape him.

"You once told me that I gave you a sense of safety that you hadn't felt in a long time," I said. "Let me make good on that expectation."

He finally looked at me again, eyes scanning my face. I wonder what he was looking for. Ruminants of my injuries or simply some sign that I was lying to him.

"Okay," I asked.

He took a deep breath before nodding. "Okay."

I felt a smile stretch across my face.

In that moment I knew that I was never going to be as in love with someone as I was with Kaz.

And I was perfectly content with that.

-----------------------

Navigation Guide

What I Write For

Some Original Characters

[lushlovers]

sad beautiful tragic, J Burrow

summary; a sad beautiful tragic love affair.

warnings; angsty oh yes, swearing in the dialogue, arguments, cheating (not on the reader), obviously tears

word count; 1.02k

note; im writing angst because twd still wrips my heart out after all these years, obviously inspired by the taylor swift song of the same title.

long handwritten notes deep in your pocket words, how little they mean when you're a little too late.

He wants to reverse time. Just an extra two minutes would make a huge difference in this moment. Everything he could've said, but now they're worth little to nothing. You, you, you, was all he could bring himself to let cross his mind. All the memories, now shadowed by you standing on his front steps begging him to say something, anything, but he wouldn't.

I stood right by the tracks, your face in a locket. Good girls, hopeful they'll be and long they will wait.

The silver chain around your neck felt like it was on fire, leaving scars in it's wake. The photo inside that locket was one that was taken on a beautiful New York night. You'd never been and Joe swore up and down he would take you there for a game, unlucky for you, you weren't able to sit with his friends, but in the stands with the screaming fans. Treated like you were nothing, while unknowingly his wife sat next to his mother.

We had a beautiful magic love affair What a sad beautiful tragic love affair.

Joe couldn't shake you from his mind. You'd blocked him from your instagram and deleted his contact as soon as you left his house that evening, cursing his name and saying things you never knew you could. It was amazing while it lasted, but God did it crash and burn.

In dreams, i meet you in warm conversation we both wake, in lonely beds in different cities

It's hard not to think what it would've been like if it hadn't ended the way he did. What if he left Gabrielle and went public with you? What if she finally chose to leave him and you could have him as all yours? However none of those what if's became a reality

After he'd showed you around the metropolis that was New York City, you chose on moving there. You had managed enough money for an extremely overpriced apartment, but it was far enough from your biggest mistake. Whenever you heard about his team possibly having a game, you'd refuse offers, because your friends knew how much you used to love that team, not anymore. Not ever.

And time Is taking its sweet time erasing you

Time went along slow as you settled in, when you originally made the purchase of you tiny apartment, you almost called him out of instinct. Almost. He kept up with you using his friends phones or even Robin's, she was suspicious. His wife was distant after you showed up on their step telling Joe you needed him and you loved him. She knew he was seeing someone else long before then, but kept quiet, using his credit cards more than usual to drown her sorrows in shopping.

And you've got your demons and darlin' they all look like me.

Your smell had somehow managed to linger on his clothes, in his car, everywhere you touched. He could sometimes still feel the ghost of your finger tips massaging the hair at the nape of his neck in only the way you knew how to. The way you'd run your nails along his back, sometimes in the most sinful situations.

'Cause we had a beautiful magic love affair what a sad beautiful tragic love affair

There was really no point in continuing what you had going with Joe, you knew that. But letting him go off to live life without you was the last thing you ever wanted to let happen. he made his choice and got his point across in the form of absolutely shattering your heart and soul, leaving you to pick the pieces up and try your best to glue it all back in place.

Distance, timing, breakdown, fighting silence, the train runs off it's tracks

As the time you shared drew to an end, nothing was enjoyable. Being in each other presence for even five minutes led to you being at each other's throats. Everyone around Joe could tell, even his wife, she noticed how when he'd go shower, the door would be locked and through the thick wood she could hear how hard he cried for you.

Kiss me try to fix it, could you just try to listen?

His lips press to your own, tears coated each other's cheeks. Not allowing yourself to indulge in him for even mere seconds, you shove him back with the littlest bit of strength you posses, "No, Joe, you're not fucking listening to me," your shouting, chest heaving.

He's never seen you this angry and never have you gone as far as to yell at him as loud as you are, "Don't push me." He mumbled wiping his eyes harshly, now his teeth are clenched, his jaw set tight. That's what did it, everything you've tried to get into hi head. How you want nothing to do with being his side piece, none of it managed to get into his thick skull.

Hang up give up and for the life of us we can't get back.

"Whatever, fuck you, Joe." You sob, desperately trying your best to catch your breath, quickly hanging up before he could even process your words. His head rolled back on his shoulders as he listened to his phone beep, glancing down at you contact name, your name followed by every kissy or heart filled emoji you could find on his phone. He never tried to change or hide it.

A beautiful magic love there what a sad beautiful tragic beautiful tragic, beautiful.

Your laughs echoed through the lit up hotel room, he fingers dancing lightly over your sides, begging for him to let up on the tickling. Finally he stops, cupping your your face in his hands, letting his eyes take in every perfect feature. "God, you're gorgeous," He smiles, kissing you breathless. If only you could stay like this forever.

What we had, a beautiful magic love affair What a sad beautiful tragic love affair. We had a beautiful magic love affair what a sad beautiful tragic love affair