#Taught myself how to code as I went

[gummilutt]

AL Gear City window made closeable

Another day, another post! Got a backlog of things to post so apologies for the slight barrage this week :) I love the AL Gear City window! It's my favorite window type for apartments, but there's always the question of, do I go with the open one, or the closed one? I love the idea of my Sims getting a fresh breeze, but as someone who lives in Sweden, you definitely don't want a window wide open when there's a thick carpet of snow on the ground. And in apartments, you can't switch it out even if you have the patience to do that every winter. It's a dilemma! My good friend gayars once made a teddybear that changes clothes as the Sims play with it, and from her I learned how to change the appearance of objects through BHAVs, which lead to this creation :) It adds a pie menu interaction to the AL window that lets you switch mesh between open and closed, so that you have a way to make the window open or closed anytime you like without needing to actually replace the window.

Download from simfileshare

Mod is a global add-on to the windows. Replaces TTAB, TTAs, Object - Model Names and adds two BHAVs. Would conflict with other mods that edit the same resources, but I think it unlikely. Four files total, for open/closed and the diagonal versions of the tow. Translated to english, swedish and spanish.

Fwaysims has two wonderful add-on sets to the Gear City windows, which are posted on MTS (Set One and Set Two). I imagine most people who like this window will have grabbed the add-on, so thanks to fway's generous policy I went ahead and gave the same treatment to them :) Please delete your original files, if you already had them. I wish I could have added it globally, but CC objects have all the code internally so have to replace the whole thing :) EDIT: I forgot to mention that prices have been altered slightly. I edited them to make it easier for myself to keep track during the making of them, and I quite like having them appear in catalog in order of size, so I decided to keep it. If you don't like it, I recommend Object Relocator for easy price changing. Original price was 105, my prices range from 96 to 107.

Download edited fway add-on sets from simfileshare

Credits: @gayars who taught me how to change graphics and appearances, @picknmixsims who helped figure out some errors in the making of this, @fwaysims for the great add on sets

Conflict Notes: Because of how CC windows work, other versions of fway's files will conflict. Ladysilverwolf-sims uses versions by revolvertrooper that repo's all windows to the closed one. I am not interested in merging them, but I made instructions of how you can merge the two yourself, if it is important to you to have all repo'd to the closed version. Instructions here.

[huellitaa]

2♡25: first quarter wrap-up! ୭🩰🐈‍⬛✧

this year, i've sectioned it out into quarters; the first, second, third, and fourth, for each three months. rather than going all in with the goals and ambitions for this year to just spread them out randomly through the year, or worse, be constantly forgetting to update them every month, something i am VERY guilty of, splitting it into manageable yet productive sections! i'd recommend this to anyone with consistency issues; it's never too late to start! ♡

.⁺ ♡ FIRST QUARTER: PROGRESS 💬🐈‍⬛🎀 ❜❜ ♡

👛𓂃 ࣪˖ inner

♡ definitely gotten braver over these past few months. i've been so much more bolder than i ever have been and i love it

♡ super bad depressive episode for majority of march (but i've handled it surprisingly well! ♡)

♡ <- went back to weekly therapy sessions

♡ worked on solidifying my self image and handling insecurities better

⊹˚. 💄beauty

♡ began exploring more types of makeup

♡ started using hair and body oil (100% noticed improvement! ♡)

♡ tried out a new haircut (jellyfish bangs! ♡)

♡ started dry brushing before showers

🧁𓂃 ࣪˖ social

♡ somehow got the most beautiful girlfriend in the world??????????? what the freak???????????ily ♡ ♡ ♡

♡ got into sum serious drama with an ex-best friend! yikes!

though this was SO stressful, it was a learning curve and gave me some really helpful insight actually into how female friendships (and malicious liars) can work. i'm grateful for the memories and the experiences she taught me, but i NEVER wanna see this girl again 😭 i love my real friends who stick by me no matter what u guys are the real ones (you know who you are.)

♡ achieved my life goal of going to a tubatu concert!!!!!!!!!!! ♡ ♡ ♡

♡ made new friends!!!!!!!!! ♡

♡ balancing my social life and my mental health better than i ever have been

♡ went to an anime & gaming con ♡

it was so super fun!!! i've always been way too shy to go to one of these things but i am always gonna be a loser at heart, so i took the opportunity and it's one of my favourite things i've done this year! little me would be so happy ♡

♡ still rewiring my mindset towards social situations (any progress is progress! ♡)

♡ gotten less scared of wearing what i want and indulging in & finding my own style in public! (little me would be so proud ♡)

⊹˚. 🐈‍⬛ academic

♡ scored 46/75 on my phase 2 maths exam (61%)

i was actually aiming to get 60% on this test!!!! i got exactly 50% last time and i'm not the best at these exams, so i'm still super proud of myself and am aiming for somewhere near 70% for phase 3 ♡

♡ placed highest in my class (again!) for term 3 english assessment ♡

♡ scored 37/50 on biology exam

♡ scored 38/50 on chemistry exam

♡ scored 45/50 on physics exam ♡

♡ got some of the highest science grades in my class! ♡

for the 3 tests altogether, i got 120/150, which is 80% in total! i was so shocked when i calculated it all, considering on the phase 1 exams i got 78/150, so 52% in total. i wasn't expecting such a huge improvement, but i studied hard, and it paid off! (would you guys like to see a post on what i did??? ♡)

♡ got my first detention ????????? what the freak

🩰𓂃 ࣪˖ artistry

♡ worked on my first proper clothing project (going beautifully ♡)

♡ began learning coding! (going super well!!!! ♡)

♡ painted for the first time in a little while

♡ gotten super into drawing and reading again

♡ actually started learning to cook!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ♡ (iykyk.)

♡ working on magazine business card designs and fashion designs

.⁺ ♡ SECOND QUARTER: AMBITIONS 💬🐈‍⬛🎀 ❜❜ ♡

⊹˚. 💄inner

♡ set up some real routines

consistency and discipline is something i've always struggled with because i can never seem to find a healthy enough balance for either of them . i want to focus on this throughout all of the second quarter, but specifically lay out some routines in april.

♡ dig into more uncomfortable sides of my mental landscape

somethign that goes hand in hand with my consistency issues is that i always forget to make time for the less glamorous stuff. i wanted to focus a lot on looking into the more unpretty sides of my mental state and beginning to work on those, as they are something i often avoid.

👛𓂃 ࣪˖ beauty

♡ pilates.

with my theme of consistency for this quarter, i wanted to add in a part i have ALWAYS procrastinated. 2023 pilates summer was PEAK and we're gonna make 2025 spring-summer pilates even better ♡

⊹˚. 🐈‍⬛ social

my social life is honestly doing amazing at the moment, so i don't think i have anything to add right now ♡

🧁𓂃 ࣪˖ academic

same as social; nothing to add here right now! ♡

⊹˚. 🩰 future

♡ financial management / money control!

aka i NEED to stop impulse buying the moment i have money😭😭😭

♡ look into work experience for the summer

i heard some of my friends are doing it this summer, and i didn't know i was able to do it, so i'm gonna look into it!!! third quarter here i come 😼😼😼

♡ continue learning coding & sewing

all my love! 🎀💬🐈‍⬛️🫶🏻🩷

[16wolke11]

GRAVITY GIRL - Kimi Antonelli

A/N I really love this one-shot, so I hope you will like it too!

WORDS: 1748

_____ 

If you had asked me three weeks ago if I believed in love at first sight, I would have laughed loudly, maybe even falling into a giggle again when thinking about it. I was always the practical type, with schedules, checklists, and colour-coded notes. Finishing school with the highest grades is my only priority right now. Being spontaneous is definitely not on my list until that last exam is written.

So when my brother George begged me to take a break from my revision sheets and just spend a bit of time with him at the tracks, "You don't have to be in school anyway and you can learn wherever you are," were his words and still I hesitated. He might be right, but all of this sounded messy, unstructured. Just unlike me.

But sitting at my desk day by day, only revising what was taught in classes of the last years slowly burns me out. It walks up to me and will drag me down when I don't bring some variety into my day.

So, I went with George. Still reluctant and grumpy, but armed with my laptop, noise-cancelling headphones, my sheets with notes and the plan on when I have to revise what.

Well and then he came.

It was on the third day I was with George, and I stepped out for a walk, convincing myself that some sun would wake me up better than the fourth coffee. The paddock is still sleepy, bathed in the morning sunlight and it looks oddly peaceful. I pass the other motorhomes, seeing someone here and there, but I just keep walking until I trip.

Shoe getting caught on the edge of the asphalt and down I went. Arms trying to get in front of me to protect the fall, sunglasses hitting the ground and then there he was. A guy on a scooter, scrolling through the paddock. One moment, I was bracing myself for the impact, and the next, strong arms were wrapped around me. Just like a scene taken straight out of a cheesy romance novel.

"Gotcha." He grins, like this is the best moment of his week and I just blink at him. His hair is messy, his skin sun-kissed and his eyes glimmer with mischief. He wears one of the Mercedes team shirts and I groan on the inside, knowing that this might make me the giggle of the day.

"Uh...thanks." I mutter, trying to smooth out my shirt, cheeks being on fire from how red I turn.

"No problem, you okay?" He asks, tilting his head to the side and I need a moment to answer.

"Fine...just gravity."

He laughs, a soft laugh that makes others grin too. "It's a real bastard, huh?"

I roll my eyes, but then see that he already got my sunglasses off the ground without me noticing. He offers them to me, and I take them without hesitating.

"Nice save by the way." He says, confusing me. What does he mean?

"You saved me?" I ask, eyebrows furrowed. This wasn't my achievement, but his.

"Exactly." He winks, swinging himself back on his scooter. "If you keep falling for strangers, try to pick the ugly ones, so you can keep me in mind." And just like that, he rolls away. I stare after him, kind of flustered, kind of annoyed and more interested than I want to admit.

His name is Kimi. Of course, I had to run into my brother's teammate before properly meeting him and of course, I didn't manage to remember him when he kept me from falling. But of course, he is sticking around in the garage when I walk around with George and comes over to me like we have been friends for years now.

"Hey, gravity girl." Kimi grins, making me groan.

"Please don't let that nickname stick."

"You are watching where you are going, or do I need to start carrying around some bubble wrap?"

George raises one of his eyebrows curiously but stays silent. I just sigh, before asking. "You are Kimi, right?"

"Guilty as charged. And you are?"

I tell him my name, before adding "George's sister."

"I figured that one out." Kimi says, nodding his head at George, but has no shame in flirting in front of my older brother.

"How?"

"Not many carry those pretty eyes around."

I should have walked away after that. I had stuff to learn. Spreadsheets to learn on my laptop, but instead I found myself staying on his side of the garage, listening to him telling stories about racing cars and making bad jokes.

Over the next weeks, I keep running into him. It is just a coincidence, I try to tell myself. Small paddock, same team, limited places to be at. But my excuses grew thinner every time Kimi makes me laugh until my side hurts, or we just share some lunch on top of the hospitality when he should be at an interview instead.

He was charming, funny and flirted with me shamelessly.

I learned that he grew up in the Mercedes family and had a second family when he was with Prema. That he usually spends all his free time doing anything related to racing and that he learned to cook from his Nonna.

The song Accidentally in Love plays on speaker when we share another lunch in the hospitality and Kimi smirks when he asks me, "Do you know that song?" I listen to it just for a moment, before a blush appears on my cheeks. "It's like number five on one of my playlists." Kimi smiles at me, before there is something else on his face, something vulnerable.

"Feel like that a little bit, doesn't it?" He asks, "You and me..."

His voice trails off and I want to scoff, say something sarcastic, but my heart stumbles and all I can mutter is.

"A little."

We weren't a couple, we hadn't even kissed, but somehow, I found myself rearranging my days around Kimis. Working when he is in the car, has meetings or is occupied otherwise. In between, we would meet up, just taking a walk, driving around on his scooter. I even let him drag me to the kitchen of the hospitality, convincing one of the chefs that we could cook in there.

It was spontaneous.

It was chaotic.

It wasn't me.

But for the first time, messy felt right.

Then, during one of our lunches on top of the hospitality came the rain. Not a storm, not just some droplets, one of those wild downpours that makes everything smell petrichor. We were just laughing about something when the sky cracked open. I squealed, trying to get up as quickly as possible, searching for shelter from the rain, Kimi following me.

"Great, that's what I get for not bringing a jacket." I huff, pushing my soaked hair out of my face while Kimi just grins.

"Dance with me."

"What?"

"Dance with me in the rain."

I stare at him for a moment, debating if he is really serious. "You know, people don't do that? It's just a thing they do in movies and books."

"It can be real if we do it."

And somehow that convinced me to let him pull me back into the pouring rain. Kimi twirls me around, a bit clumsily but still lovingly, singing off-key, making me laugh with every twirl. Then, somewhere between the laughing, our eyes lock. It's like being pulled by an invisible string before our lips meet.

The kiss wasn't slow, cinematic or soft. It was messy, wet from the rain, but still full of warmth and the best of it, it was real.

Kissing in the rain might be straight up a cliche, but it was perfect for us.

The next morning, I was drinking my coffee in the hospitality area alone. The temperature dropped after the rain last night, like it is a mirror of my mind. I shouldn't feel anxious about that kiss with Kimi. I should be revising, learning for my exam and thinking about what comes next. Instead, that kiss plays in my head over and over again. Then George joins me.

"You and Kimi, huh?"

"Maybe?" I ask, trying to figure out if he is okay with that, but George just smiles at me.

"You like him?"

"I didn't mean to." I sigh, making my brother laugh softly.

"That's how it usually happens."

The last evening of my time with George has come and I, of course, spent it with Kimi. We are on the balcony of his hotel room, staring at the stars.

"I don't want to go." I whisper, something I wouldn't have said a few weeks ago. Where I wanted nothing more than to go back home to my study environment, but I like what I have here.

"Then don't." Kimi just mutters and I turn my head around with a sigh.

"That is not how it works."

"Why not?"

"Because life, exams, reality."

Kimi is quiet and I know he does understand what I say, having to face his own exams soon as well, but we don't want to face reality again. We want to keep sharing time around a schedule, not have to part ways that just started to intervene.

"Can I come visit you?"

"You want to come to me when it would be easier for me to just join George again?"

Kimi nods. "Want to see where you live. Crash your time schedule." He hesitates before adding a whispered. "Steal your heart all over again."

"You are assuming you already have it." I tease him, but Kimi just reaches for my hand and laces his fingers with mine.

"You are the one who fell, gravity girl."

The next morning, I had to leave, but my head was filled with memories now and not only with the stuff for the exam. The feeling of Kimi's lips still lingering on mine and back home, I didn't lose his presence either.

The tight learning schedule came back, but something had shifted. I started to do little tasks in between again, something to loosen everything up, even danced on the balcony in pouring rain just to have the memory of Kimi close.

And every few nights, he would call with FaceTime.

Maybe I didn't mean to fall, maybe I didn't accidentally fall in love, but now that I have experienced something that wasn't planned, I don't want to go back anymore. 

[fellthemarvelous]

Aziraphale hate makes my brain hurt.

Like let's be really fuckin' for real here.

Neurodivergent fans have repeatedly said that Aziraphale is autistic coded. I agree with them. I have never been diagnosed but I wonder about myself. If only I could get a doctor to take me seriously enough to test me for it, but alas, I'm a 43-year-old woman living in the good ole US of A.

Those with religious trauma have repeatedly said that they identify with him as well. I'm one of those people. I endured 12 years of Catholic schools and just as much time being taught a very black and white view of things that I've had to spend more than 20 goddamn fucking years working to unlearn.

I find that my views as a survivor of religious abuse are often dismissed because people keep wanting to say "Aziraphale doesn't have religious trauma." Yes, thank you, I get that, but unless you've been indoctrinated and brainwashed into a very black and white view of the world, you probably don't understand the kind of feelings Aziraphale's onscreen experiences evoke in so many of us. Heaven might not be real, but the feelings of "God is always watching" still stick with me today even though I no longer believe in God. I have entirely denounced Christianity because of my own personal experience, and I refuse to allow people to try and guilt me or shame me for trauma that I didn't ask for. I wasn't given a choice.

As a child I was told that God was real and always watching everything you do (just like Santa Claus) and can hear everything you say and knows everything you are thinking. Do you know what I learned to do in order to cope with this overwhelming and anxiety-inducing information as a small child? I learned to censor my thoughts. I never spoke up, and I have always felt like I was putting on a show for people because I had to be who I was told to be or I would get into trouble.

Aziraphale said "poverty is a virtue" during The Resurrectionists, and as someone who grew up in the Bible belt and went to private schools, I was taught this very same shit by the Catholic church. He learned in that very same episode that "poverty is a virtue" is actually a tool of oppression to keep the poor poor and the wealthy wealthy. I know we all watched the episode. He went into that episode believing what he said, but by the end of it he knew it was actually utter bullshit. Aziraphale is not ignorant. He's highly intelligent, and he has never been too proud to admit when he has been wrong. He accepts that the information he learned before is not matching up with reality.

And it's so obvious some of you have zero experience with that type of indoctrination because of how very little empathy you show Aziraphale for his "mistake" of "choosing Heaven over Crowley" and "making Crowley sad" so clearly Aziraphale must somehow be "abusive" and "manipulative" and "selfish" and "self-centered" because he didn't choose to run away with Crowley at the end of season two.

First of all.

FIRST OF ALL...

Aziraphale has a mind of his own.

Aziraphale is always going to try and do what is right.

Aziraphale is an angel. He's a being of love. And the reason he's so "bad" at being an angel is because he actually wants to protect humanity. He has always loved humanity. He repeatedly has to contend with what is "right" versus what is "good" and "wrong" versus "evil". Yeah, he has flaws. He's an angel, not a goddamn fucking saint. He has lived on Earth for more than 6,000 years. He has seen everything. He loves doing human things.

He's obsessed with magic. It makes him so happy. He's not very good at it...well not when he's trying to put on a show for Crowley.

He chose to learn French the hard way, so even though he knows every single language in the world, he chooses to be mediocre at French. Something that annoys and amuses Crowley at the same time.

He loves to dance even though angels aren't supposed to dance, and dancing with Crowley was what he wanted the most.

He owns a bookshop and refuses to sell any of his books because they are books he's had for as long as there have been books. He will chase customers away from his collection, and Crowley understands how much they mean to Aziraphale because he refuses to sell any when Aziraphale leaves him in charge.

He and Crowley have been speaking to each other in coded language for more than 6,000 years. They have to be very careful about what they say because Heaven and Hell are always watching.

Heaven has photographs of Crowley and Aziraphale sitting or standing together throughout history. Hell had one photo of Crowley and Aziraphale actually working together and it was Aziraphale's quick thinking and how good he actually is at sleight of hand tricks that managed to get that photo out of Furfur's hands so he wouldn't be able to turn Crowley over to the Dark Council.

Aziraphale saved Crowley from being taken to Hell again. He wasn't able to save Crowley from Hell in Edinburgh, but he sure as heck managed to save Crowley from Hell during WWII. He took Crowley to his bookshop and showed Crowley that he stole the picture from Furfur. He saved Crowley.

You get that, right?

Aziraphale SAVED Crowley.

People always talk about how it's "always Crowley saving Aziraphale" because apparently heroic acts are only heroic when they are grand gestures. The sleight of hand wasn't heroic at all, am I right? It wasn't sparkly and showy. It wasn't interesting enough, therefore not heroic. At least that's all I'm hearing when people start with their "blah Aziraphale deserves to suffer because I have no imagination or ability to understand the media in front of me blah", and all these reasons he deserves to suffer is because Crowley almost got hurt.

Aziraphale did that without flinching and I watch that part closely every single time. He's not scared for himself. He's scared for Crowley, and he managed to hold onto that photograph. He did not fail Crowley. He protected Crowley.

And so here's another thing that we like to point out. The way that Aziraphale, an angel who is effeminate and male presenting, an angel who is soft and full of love, an angel who is kind and forgiving because he has empathy and compassion, is somehow painted as abusive and manipulative. He's not violent, but he could easily fuck up your world. He doesn't use his powers. We have no idea how powerful he is because we only ever see him do small acts. He's used to hiding. It's the only way he has ever been able to protect Crowley.

And I'm not saying that Aziraphale has actually saved Crowley before means that Crowley hasn't also saved Aziraphale. Like, you get that those are not mutually exclusive and their relationship is not transactional, right? They have spent their entire existence protecting each other but never actually getting to be together because Heaven and Hell are always watching.

Yeah, Crowley fell. We all know this. We are aware of this. He was the serpent of Eden. He gave humanity the knowledge of free will.

But what we don't talk about is what Aziraphale gave humanity.

What did he give them?

We all know what it is!

Let's say it together!

He gave Adam and Eve his flaming sword because it was dangerous outside the garden and Eve was pregnant and she was already having a really bad day. He showed them compassion and gave them his extremely powerful angelic weapon so they would stand a chance on the outside of the garden. He gave humanity the gift of compassion. It's just unfortunate that his flaming sword became a weapon of War.

And then what did he do after that?

Ooooh, yeah, that's right.

God asked him about it and he straight up lied to her and pretended he had no idea where he'd managed to misplace it. She didn't say anything after that. He told Crowley the truth though. He told Crowley the truth even though Crowley fell.

Yeah, we know Aziraphale has done some really fucking questionable things. He and Crowley both suck at passing for human in front of observant people like Nina. They're not human. They are still learning, but they managed to experience human history together despite being on opposite sides and their experiences with humanity are what has shaped them into the compassionate and loving duo they are now. One of them is not better from the other.

This, my friends, is what we call meeting in the middle. It's why shades of gray is so important. Aziraphale constantly breaks the rules. Crowley refused to play by Heaven's rules. It's the reason he fell. He doesn't play by Hell's rules either. These two dorks figured out how to cancel each others' miracles out throughout human history in order to have more time learning about humanity and each other because working all day every day sucks when there are so many new things to learn and experience with the people you love.

We know Crowley and Aziraphale both love each other. Neither of them are good at hiding the hearts stars in their eyes.

But here's what's really fucking annoying about the Aziraphale hate.

Aziraphale was already crying when Crowley grabbed him and kissed him. Aziraphale is trying so very hard to do the right thing. He loves Crowley. He does. But he also has a duty to humanity, and he has taken that job very seriously since the creation of Adam and Eve. He sent them out into the world with a flaming sword so they would have a chance at surviving beyond the walls of the garden.

And he knows that Something Terrible is going to happen and he spent all of second season trying to figure out what that Something Terrible was while trying to have some sort of more honest and open relationship with Crowley, but again, they aren't human, they are a demon and an angel approaching life from opposite sides who met in the middle and fell in love with humanity together.

He wants more than anything to tell Crowley how he feels about him, but he wants to do something grand for Crowley because Crowley has always been grand and dramatic and sexy and a little bit scary.

Crowley is impulsive and has a temper and sometimes says the wrong thing but he has always trusted Aziraphale because Aziraphale gave him a chance even after he fell. Aziraphale chose to shelter him instead of smiting him while they stood on top of that wall. He knew he was supposed to kill Crowley, but oops, he gave his sword away to the humans so he didn't really have anything to kill him with and Crowley is the one who created nebulas. The Pillars of Creation is Crowley's work and Aziraphale was there to witness that, but he watched Crowley more than he watched the nebula. He witnessed the pure joy on Crowley's face when he said "let there be light" as a nebula full of colors exploded before their eyes. He was fascinated by Crowley.

But Aziraphale is going back to Heaven even though he has made it perfectly clear he absolutely has no desire to go back to Heaven. He told the Metatron this during their conversation. He spoke these words out loud. They exist.

But then The Metatron said this....

The Metatron. The very same angel who told Aziraphale in season one "to speak to me is to speak to the Almighty." He's the boss. He's the big guy. He's used to existing as a giant head and he had to give himself a body so he wouldn't stand out on Earth. And he knows that Aziraphale and Crowley have been working together since the beginning. He knows they worked together to prevent Armageddon in season one, and now he's made it clear he knows they were working together long before that. And let's face it, Aziraphale really wants to know what this Something Terrible is that Gabriel is running from so he can try to prevent it from happening.

It makes sense that he would want to take Crowley to Heaven with him because he would be able to keep Hell from getting their hands on him again. Aziraphale hates it in Heaven. He doesn't want to go, but Something Terrible is happening and Metatron isn't taking no for an answer, and maybe Heaven won't be so bad if Crowley is there with him. At least they can fix Heaven together.

But Crowley can't go back. We all get that. We don't blame him for saying no. It doesn't change anything.

Something Terrible is about to happen and Aziraphale has to figure out what it is. He wants to change Heaven.

He is fully aware that Heaven sucks. He still has faith in God. His faith isn't in Heaven. He deserted his platoon in season one and threw himself back to Earth so he could figure out how to make sure the war between Heaven and Hell doesn't happen.

But see, here's the thing. Heaven is at the top. Heaven has all the resources. Heaven is responsible for the creation of Hell. Heaven is empty and Hell is overpopulated. Aziraphale knows this. Crowley knows this. It's obvious every time we see either place. Both sides are desperate to go to war and will not hesitate to destroy humanity in the process. This is the opposite of what Crowley and Aziraphale want for humanity. If anyone can change Heaven, it's Aziraphale. He's the only one up there who gives a shit about humanity as far as we know. No one else is going to speak on humanity's behalf.

Some of us are so busy getting mad at Aziraphale for going back to Heaven and giving Crowley a Big Sad. Newsflash: Crowley is not the main character of Good Omens. Aziraphale and Crowley are equals, yet we wanna hold Aziraphale to higher standards because he's an angel, and when he makes mistakes it's proof that he's the bad guy.

Holy mother of all things that trigger my religious trauma, let me tell you. I spent my entire life hating myself every time I made mistakes. I've had to teach myself that just because I mess up sometimes doesn't mean I'm bad. It means I'm human. I still struggle with it. I probably always will. So when you say that Aziraphale deserves to be punished for breaking Crowley's heart, you not only ignore that Aziraphale's heart is also broken, you're saying he deserves to be punished for doing what he thinks is right.

Wanting to change Heaven for the better is not a bad thing.

And some of y'all wanna see him suffer for going back into the lion's den that is Heaven, knowing that he is already an outcast, that they have already tried to kill him once, knowing that he is a deserter, that he has been lying to Heaven about a lot of things, and you still think he's blinded by Heaven? You think he's just so naive and that's the only reason he's going back. He doesn't show his emotions the same way Crowley does so it means he doesn't care as much. He's expected to consider Crowley's feelings over his own when making choices. Like holy shit if all of that hasn't defined my experience as a woman with religious trauma in this fucking society. He's expected to be subservient to Crowley and if he doesn't do what Crowley wants then he's being unreasonable and illogical.

What the actual fuck, y'all.

Like seriously.

I'm sick of this bullshit. I had to step away from this fandom because of how toxic some people in this fandom are. It's not chasing me away, but the fact that I chose to hang out in a a more toxic fandom that is already notorious for being really toxic over a fandom that claims to be more open-minded and welcoming should probably tell you something.

It gave me a lot of perspective, and yeah, I'm still gonna speak up against the bullshit Aziraphale hate.

People are entitled to their opinions, but the Aziraphale hate isn't an opinion. It's just ableist, misogynistic garbage. At this point we all know y'all say these extreme things about Aziraphale because y'all get more joy out of the harm and alienation it is causing others.

Keep being loudly wrong, but if you think I'm not entitled to challenge shitty-ass, harmful, hateful discourse, bite my ass.

I'm not the one who lost the plot in this fandom.

[fandomloreblog]

⚔️ DARKCOM Elite Ops Headcanons ⚔️

CAPCOM refused to feed us, so I’m doing it myself and giving the 4 unnamed DARKCOM members lore and backstory. God works fast, but a possibly autistic trans dude works faster. Please reblog or comment your own additions, or tag me in fics/works y’all make so I can see what everyone else thinks!

Warnings: Mentions of dead/shitty family members.

Sentry: Annette Rhodes Jr.

Annette is 27 but was actually the first of the group to join DARKCOM. She joined as an IT specialist after college, but a demon broke out of holding, which allowed her superiors to see her field capabilities. She was then scouted out as an Intelligence Officer for various units before being promoted to Elite Ops.

The only girl of 5 children, so she got spoiled and protected a lot by both her parents and brothers. However, brothers are of course, brothers, and taunted and bullied each other, so she has some tough skin.

Her name is from her Mom, Annette Rhodes Sr. It’s a family tradition for them that the firstborn daughters are named Annette.

The fastest out of the main group, despite mostly being a recon, R&D and intelligence.

Since she’s indoors and stuck researching most of the time, she’s become addicted to reality tv and cheesy drama shows. She can recite basically an episode from the week’s roster of shows from memory.

Extremely good and protective over the team’s weaponry and vehicles. What work time she spends not in research or operations, she’s busy developing new weapons and vehicles. She can (and will) have a lecture prepared whenever someone (usually King) breaks them.

Got her code name “Sentry” for staring at a singular demon they had in interrogation for 7 hours straight. She wanted to see if it could shape shift (it could. She stopped when it did).

Patriot: Boston Peyton-Ross

Boston is 34, the oldest of the Elite Ops gang, he joined DARKCOM 3-ish months after Annette. He enlisted as a ground soldier after his wife was kidnapped by a cult and murdered, all for summoning demons. His skills and determination had him promoted to Elite Ops first, however.

Grew up with a working mom and a SAHD. He has two younger sisters and a few nieces and nephews. Came from a standard White Pickett Fence neighborhood where the kids played outdoors and had weekly barbecues.

Was actually the nerd in school. Earned salutatorian and a US Army Scholarship to Harvard, where he got a degree in History.

He was actually former Army (joined at 18 to pay for his college), where he served multiple tours before retiring in his 20’s to become a teacher in the suburbs. Enlisted in DARKCOM after his wife died.

Reluctant dad figure. Singlehandedly kept most of the group from eating each other when angry (mostly Mary and King).

History nerd (He taught 7th Grade History for a bit). Knows basically everything that happened to the US since its founding. Can and will nerd out about the founding fathers and explain which of them should’ve gotten a musical as well.

He once went on a 30-minute rant about the War of 1812 and how dumb it was. That was how he got the nickname “Patriot”.

Served as a tactician and breacher, basically the “kick down doors” guy who also plans how to kick down said doors.

Despite everything, he’s extremely mild-mannered and chill. Lots of dad energy, ironically.

King: Javier “JJ” Ramirez

JJ’s 24, the youngest of the DARKCOM group, both in age and years served. He enlisted in DARKCOM as a way to get out of jail earlier.

Javier got the nickname JJ due to his full name- Javier Joaqín Ramirez. He shortened his name into JJ as a kid because he liked it better, and nowadays only gets called Javier by his closest friends.

He was raised by his uncle after his parents were arrested, getting into trouble and shoplifting. Ended up getting kicked out at 15 onto the streets until he got arrested and enlisted into DARKCOM in exchange for getting his record cleared with no jail time. Doesn’t have any siblings.

Dyed his hair blonde after his “mentor” figure, an older orphan and fellow pickpocket by the name of Gregory. He was inadvertently shot and killed during a robbery by cops, which is why JJ kept dying his hair after enlisting. A tribute to the one guy who looked out for him.

Serves as a sort of all-rounder for Elite Ops, fighting, recon, interrogation, etc. If you need an extra set of hands, he’s there and raring to go.

Basically knows a guy for everything, and at this point, no one questions how, why, or even if it is legal. He ends up helping Sentry to find a lot of contacts when it comes to finding demons.

Got the nickname King for eating Annette’s King chess pieces when playing against her. She assumed she lost it and forfeited it until he confessed. He is still proud of that, despite everything.

Fell first and fell HARD for Ninja at first sight. Extremely cuddle and touchy when it comes to her.

Ninja: Judith Lawes

Judith’s 26, and joined DARKCOM the same time as Patriot did. She enlisted in Covert Operations, doing stealth missions and less than legal situations before being promoted to Elite Ops.

Grew up with a single mom and a twin brother. Her brother went off to college and got rich, while she stayed behind to take care of their mom. DARKCOM enlisted her in exchange for paying her mom’s medical treatment and care. Doesn’t keep in contact with her brother.

Serves as the main stealth operator, along with a back-up tank. Prides herself in ambush and assassination techniques. Usually what she does is “classified”, courtesy of Baines.

Extreme night owl. Unless required by missions, she’s in her room, curled up with her plushies and snoozing during the day. She’s usually up at night, getting food, working, or just existing.

Extreme video game nerd. Animal Crossing and Pokemon are her favorites, mostly due to the cute creatures which she then gets plushies of.

Fell for King later, and got way too attached. He started gifting her plushies, and it was over from there. She works under the “if anything happened to Javier, I would kill everyone in this room” mentality.

Ninja’s nickname was earned after she singlehandedly jump scared everyone at night at least once. Mary almost sucker punched her, Annette and JJ both screamed like girls, and Patriot just flinched. She was called a Ninja afterwards.

[teloisstuff]

@elmaxlys already made #perfect rant posts about F2RX and I agree 100% with everything they said, but I never got to write my rage down myself and so here are my top grievances with Foot 2 rue Extreme in order of pain :

Disrespecting previous canon :

Tag is a mockery of his previous self. Essentially stripping away most of his personality, they also added super random and really improbable things such as : Having learned horse-riding (WHEN?!), suddenly having learned to play the piano, and MOST importantly not being an exceptionnal football player (HIM NOT DOMINATING THE FIELD WHEN PLAYING WITH THE KIDS IS JUST NOT BELIEVABLE). Tag had enough of a story with 3 seasons and a comic, they didn't need to add all the stupid extra stuff as if they were trying to invent him a personality (#his room being full of random shit that has no reference to the previous stuff).

He only met his father when he was 14.... The original story made a point of digging into serious themes and the emotional struggle of the characters, as football gave the catharsis that helped them get through it. There is NO WAY that at 17, Tag's issues have all disappeared and he is now a 100% healthy confident and nurturing adult.

Pablo's name is changed to Ramon, and his whole story seems to have disappeared. His relationship with Tag is as if he'd been around his whole life. The fact that he theoretically has been captured and IMPRISONED is shown nowhere.

They basically didn't want to bother with Foot2Rue and the story it had told, so why add the previous characters at all?

Superficial themes and story :

Foot 2 rue was a kid's show about playing football in the street, right?

WRONG.

It's a story about growing up in an unfair, chaotic society and football helping them bond and find hope.

The whole point is that this childhood pass-time was their resilience against everything around them ;

- where they were unequal in their life, on the playing field everyone was the same, had the same opportunities and rules,

-when they were alone in life, on the playing field they had a family,

-and when their life showed cruelty and malevolence, the game taught them empathy, understanding and respect.

THAT was the "dream" of street football, that's why they call it a dream throughout most of the original show.

The point of the world championship wasn't about winning or being the "coolest" or most athletic player, it was about bringing this shared "dream" to unite all the kids growing up in this world.

Extreme Football has gone completely beside this point.

The only motivation for the team is winning and looking cool. What makes a great player to them is just their athletic ability. They go through regular childhood troubles that have no deeper meaning or demonstration of the world and the society they live in. (and the resolutions for these are pretty shallow and clumsy). They seem to live in a weird utopian/futuristic city that is super polished, and so NO real-world issues can be adressed.

Basically the show is JUST a kid's show about playing football... how sad.

The animation and chara design :

I am not an anti-CGI, only traditional 2D purist. I was pretty excited the new adaptation was going to be CGI, as I had also a good memory of the early CGI in kids shows like code Lyoko, and Galactic football.

but DAMN does it look bad.

The main characters design is bland, but that's ok for the main characters, and the other characters are pretty much as much caricatures as the original Street football characters were, but the animation is INCONSISTENT, the lighting/shading seems unequal from one episode to the next, the environment is BORING and polished to a point where it just looks extremely fake.

I already went on a bit about what they did to Tag, but damn the redesign just doesn't work.... once again, the direction for the character just seems VERY random, as Tag has never been into fashion why the hell would he start wearing a bandana, and live with one side of his joggings rolled up? and like, why would his face become ROUNDER with age?

(This goes the same way for Eloise whose appearance in the last episode both made me a little happy but also hurt my eyes)

The new characters/main characters :

As the world and the narrative doesn't give them much to work with, obviously it is hard to be engaged and learn to like them.

Obviously the main problem is Samy, whose hurtful words/actions are not grounded in any deep story making him just a petty brat. Often his harmful behavior is not challenged, especially with the way he treats Tag which drives me nuts.

The worst part is that there is POTENTIAL for a deep dynamic that could have made for a better story that adresses re-building broken families but... No. He is a brat but in a vacuum so it doesn't evolve into an interesting arc or even make sense really.

(They could have made an interesting parallel between him dealing with his parent's separating and having to accept a new unwanted family member and Tag dealing with the realities of family that he never got to experience, and integrating into a family life that he WANTED but doesn't know. Also there could have been references to Tag's memories of "Pti Dragon"....)

I could go on for longer but this post would never end....

[venusianbarbiedoll]

✧✦ 𝐌𝐘 𝐒𝐔𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐎 𝐎𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐈𝐍 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘

I am the daughter of Aphrodite and a mortal man named Eduardo Valencia. I was raised by my father since my mother couldn’t take care of me, seeing that she’s a goddess and all. We lived in Starling City and I went to school there. He wasn’t the best dad considering he was always at work. But he was all I had.

We used to live in Central City where my best friends were Wally and his cousin, Jack, also lived up until I was eight years old and then we moved to Starling City. The reason why we left was because my Dad got a job offer in a construction company. It paid a bit more so we moved.

I lived with him until I was twelve years old. That was when Count Vertigo murdered him by injecting him with his drug. Following this, I stayed with my Mom on Mount Olympus for the next few years. I was shocked to hear that Zeus was allowing her to take me in, but incredibly grateful as well. During that time, she taught me more about my powers and magic. It also gave me the opportunity to learn more about my celestial heritage and family. I bonded with my relatives like Apollo, Hestia, Artemis, Aphrodite (of course), etc. It was amazing but eventually I had to go back to Earth.

After returning, I decided to avenge my father's death by battling criminals and investigating his killer. I adopted the code name Cupid in honor of my mother, the goddess of love. While I occasionally use a bow and arrow, my primary weapons are daggers.

my weapons:

At the age of fourteen, while thwarting a robbery, Black Canary and Green Arrow found me and offered their assistance. They asked me who my parents were. When I told them that I had none, they took me in.

Through them, I met Roy and, eventually, my future best friend, Artemis. They trained me, and I joined the new team for the “sidekicks” alongside Robin, Kaldur, and Wally. Although Roy didn't join the team, we maintained contact and he was always kind to me, like an older brother.

It wasn’t too long after joining the team that pI found out who my father really was. Before he died, he was a villain known as The Prowler and he worked for horrible people—the same people who were hurting Starling City, the place I called home. I found this out after I met Oliver and Dinah, my adoptive parents.

How did I find out about this? Well, Sportsmaster (Artemis’ dad) let it slip once when I was fighting him. He didn’t know who I was though, not my real identity at least. He was just bringing my father up because he said that I had eyes that resembled his greatly. Well, he said that I had the same eyes as The Prowler technically, not those of Eduardo Valencia as I knew him. But who’s to say that he didn’t know that I was The Prowler’s daughter…?

I haven’t told anyone since finding out. How could anyone trust me if they knew my father was a horrible person who had committed crimes for a living? It shamed me to be related to someone who could do such horrible things. I would just have to keep it to myself in the meantime; but like they say, the truth always comes out, one way or another.

my superhero suits:

my mission suits:

my training suits:

[nocturnalazure]

Non-sims interests

I wasn't tagged but I feel like yapping so... here you go!

Many of my interests have sub-interests because when I'm obsessed... well, I'm obsessed. ;)

Japan

This is a big one. When I was around 13, I got interested in Japanese language and culture through reading manga. I went to Japan for the first time when I was 17, and I've been returning there about every 5 to 6 year. Most of my Japanese language skills are self-taught, although I did take evening courses every now and then. I'm far from being fluent, but I can get by in basic conversations. I've read countless books on Japan, and I have a degree on Asian culture. I'm often identified at the "Japan expert" everywhere I go, and I'm frequently asked for traveling tips.

Sub-interest was manga and anime of course. It used to be a huge interest of mine when I was younger. It wasn't that common in the 90's/early 2000's and I was so obsessed that I had read almost everything that was published at the time. I had my favorites of course, which were sub-interests in themselves because I collected everything related to them. I had even started building a website (we're talking about 2001 here, if you wanted a website, you literally had to code it yourself). I also drew my own manga (*cringe*). And I met my husband on a manga/anime forum. :) Now, I only occasionally read manga or watch anime, but it's been a huge part of my life for a very long time and I can still obsess for months over an anime or a manga that I really enjoy.

I've always listened to a lot of Jmusic, particularly when I was a manga nerd, but even now. I listen to any genre as long as it's in Japanese: pop, rock, metal, funk, soul, reggae, rap, jazz, electro, traditional... I know obscure Japanese bands that even Japanese know nothing about. I can also sing in Japanese and karaoke is a sub-interest of mine. ;) I sometimes organize karaoke sessions with myself!

And then when my manga obsession was decreasing, I got into Jdramas (that was around 2008-2012). I watched more than a hundred of them, at a time when it was a lot less available than it is now. You had to actually download each episode on malware-ridden websites. Even if I don't watch as many dramas as I did at the time, I still know many Japanese actors. :)

Reading

I'm on GoodReads and The Story Graph so I can keep up with my library (I love stats and lists!). I've tried to list all the books I've ever read, and without counting manga or comics, it reaches more than a thousand (70% English - 30% French). My average for the past 5 years is 80 books per year, of which 20% are comics/manga/graphic novels. My favorite genre is fantasy, followed closely by historical novels, romance and sci-fi. I read about 15-20% non-fiction (psychology, history, sociology, feminism, biographies/memoirs, essays,...). I love anything set anywhere in the world between the 1800s and 1930. Regency and Victorian eras, as well as the Meiji period in Japan, are sub-interests of mine.

Another sub-interest I've developed is analyzing plot and character development, what works and what doesn't. Also: the different themes and sensitivities in different cultures. I find it fascinating, and of course since writing is a sub-interest of mine, I do try to get some tips for myself.

Dogs

I never do things in halves, so when my husband and I decided to adopt a dog, I went all in. I started reading about dog breeds, about how to take care of a dog, how to train them and the kind of food they can eat. Now I can't see a dog and not go 'awww'. If there's a dog in the room, you'll find me right next to it, trying to make friends.

Sustainable Lifestyle

I've bought my groceries from organic shops for more than 15 years. I've always loved good food, made with quality products, so combined with my interest for environment, that was an obvious choice for me. I cook myself just about every single meal. I like to make it nutritious, balanced and healthy, and I use tons of fresh herbs and spices. I'm careful about what I buy, so that there is no waste and so that I buy at a fair price from a local producer preferably.

My cosmetics are entirely natural and for the minor injuries and diseases, I use natural solutions as much as I can. I know quite a bit about essential oils, aloe vera and the like. ;) I've tested a lot of different products before I could identify those I liked best, so I know many organic cosmetic brands. I also clean my house with products that are both biodegradable and environment-friendly.

I love fashion and decoration, but I've drastically cut my shopping expenses for the past 10 years. I've been very careful about what I buy, trying instead to find the one quality piece that matches best with the rest of my clothes or with my general style. I've spent a lot of time analyzing my closet to identify the colors that most suit my skin tone and how to match outfits in the best way. If I have to buy something, I try to buy it second hand if I can. Having less clothes and a consistent style seems to pay off, because it takes me less time to get dressed in the morning and I often get compliments. :)

Food

As explained above, I love good, homemade food, but I also love going to the restaurant. My cooking is simple and unsophisticated, so I really enjoy ordering stuff that I could never do myself. I'm curious about new experiences, I can try just about anything: roasted grasshoppers, natto, pig's ear or even cow's teat. I've been lucky enough to go to very fancy restaurants (unlike Erik, I'm quite comfortable with menus ;)) and it's always a pleasure for my taste buds. My friends know I'm a food buff and I'm often asked for restaurant recommendations or to explain an ingredient.

[kayuripax]

Valve news and the AI

So. I assume people saw some posts going around on how valve has new AI rules, and things getting axed. And because we live in a society, I went down the rabbit hole to learn my information for myself. Here's what I found, under a cut to keep it easier. To start off, I am not a proponent of AI. I just don't like misinformation. So. Onwards.

VALVE AND THE AI

First off, no, AI will not take things over. Let me show you, supplemented by the official valve news post from here. (because if hbomberguy taught us anything it is to cite your sources)

[Image id: a screenshot from the official valve blog. It says the following:

First, we are updating the Content Survey that developers fill out when submitting to Steam. The survey now includes a new AI disclosure section, where you'll need to describe how you are using AI in the development and execution of your game. It separates AI usage in games into two broad categories:

Pre-Generated: Any kind of content (art/code/sound/etc) created with the help of AI tools during development. Under the Steam Distribution Agreement, you promise Valve that your game will not include illegal or infringing content, and that your game will be consistent with your marketing materials. In our pre-release review, we will evaluate the output of AI generated content in your game the same way we evaluate all non-AI content - including a check that your game meets those promises.

Live-Generated: Any kind of content created with the help of AI tools while the game is running. In addition to following the same rules as Pre-Generated AI content, this comes with an additional requirement: in the Content Survey, you'll need to tell us what kind of guardrails you're putting on your AI to ensure it's not generating illegal content. End image ID]

So. Let us break that down a bit, shall we? Valve has been workshopping these new AI rules since last June, and had adopted a wait and see approach beforehand. This had cost them a bit of revenue, which is not ideal if you are a company. Now they have settled on a set of rules. Rules that are relatively easy to understand. - Rule one: Game devs have to disclose when their game has AI - Rule two: If your game uses AI, you have to say what kind it uses. Did you generate the assets ahead of time, and they stay like that? Or are they actively generated as the consumer plays? - Rule three: You need to tell Valve the guardrails you have to make sure your live-generating AI doesn't do things that are going against the law. - Rule four: If you use pre-generated assets, then your assets cannot violate copyright. Valve will check to make sure that you aren't actually lying.

That doesn't sound too bad now, does it? This is a way Valve can keep going. Because they will need to. And ignoring AI is, as much as we all hate it, not going to work. They need to face it. And they did. So. Onto part two, shall we?

[Image ID: a screenshot from the official Valve blog. It says the following: Valve will use this disclosure in our review of your game prior to release. We will also include much of your disclosure on the Steam store page for your game, so customers can also understand how the game uses AI. End image ID]

Let's break that down. - Valve will show you if games use AI. Because they want you to know that. Because that is transparency.

Part three.

[Image ID: A screenshot from the official Valve blog. It says the following:

Second, we're releasing a new system on Steam that allows players to report illegal content inside games that contain Live-Generated AI content. Using the in-game overlay, players can easily submit a report when they encounter content that they believe should have been caught by appropriate guardrails on AI generation.

Today's changes are the result of us improving our understanding of the landscape and risks in this space, as well as talking to game developers using AI, and those building AI tools. This will allow us to be much more open to releasing games using AI technology on Steam. The only exception to this will be Adult Only Sexual Content that is created with Live-Generated AI - we are unable to release that type of content right now. End Image ID]

Now onto the chunks.

Valve is releasing a new system that makes it easier to report questionable AI content. Specifically live-generated AI content. You can easily access it by steam overlay, and it will be an easier way to report than it has been so far.

Valve is prohibiting NSFW content with live-generating AI. Meaning there won't be AI generated porn, and AI companions for NSWF content are not allowed.

That doesn't sound bad, does it? They made some rules so they can get revenue so they can keep their service going, while also making it obvious for people when AI is used. Alright? Alright. Now calm down. Get yourself a drink.

---

Team Fortress Source 2

My used source here is this.

There was in fact a DCMA takedown notice. But it is not the only thing that led to the takedown. To sum things up: There were issues with the engine, and large parts of the code became unusable. The dev team decided that the notice was merely the final nail in the coffin, and decided to take it down. So that is that. I don't know more on this, so I will not say more, because I don't want to spread misinformation and speculation. I want to keep some credibility, please and thanks.

---

Portal Demake axed

Sources used are from here, here and here.

Portal 64 got axed. Why? Because it has to do with Nintendo. The remake uses a Nintendo library. And one that got extensively pirated at that. And we all know how trigger-happy Nintendo is with it's intellectual property. And Nintendo is not exactly happy with Valve and Steam, and sent them a letter in 2023.

[Image ID: a screenshot from a PC-Gamer article. It says the following: It's possible that Valve's preemptive strike against Portal 64 was prompted at least in part by an encounter with Nintendo in 2023 over the planned release of the Dolphin emulator for the Wii and Gamecube consoles on Steam. Nintendo sent a letter to Valve ahead of that launch that attorney Kellen Voyer of Voyer Law said was a "warning shot" against releasing it. End Image ID.]

So. Yeah. Nintendo doesn't like people doing things with their IP. Valve is most likely avoiding potential lawsuits, both for themselves and Lambert, the dev behind Portal 64. Nintendo is an enemy one doesn't want to have. Valve is walking the "better safe than sorry" path here.

---

There we go. This is my "let's try and clear up some misinformation" post. I am now going to play a game, because this took the better part of an hour. I cited my sources. Auf Wiedersehen.

[caeliflammae]

ok im seeing a LOT of very odd conversations taking place on tiktok rn in regards to catholicism. the general consensus is that converts are annoying and still essentially evangelicals, and most cradle catholics dislike converts. i can totally get behind all of that! converts are annoying as hell! jd vance definitely killed the pope! what i cant get behind, however, is this idea that catholicism is inherently better than every other christian religion, and that being a cradle catholic makes you a better person. also seeing a lot of "converts aren't really catholic because they dont love their neighbors! im a good person because i was raised catholic!" and uh. can we run that back REAAAAAAAAAAALLLL QUICK???? ARE WE ALL TALKING ABOUT THE SAME CATHOLIC CHURCH RN???

like dont get me wrong. i was raised catholic, i consider myself culturally catholic (im cuban/puerto rican theres literally no escaping it) and i definitely have a complicated relationship with the church. i understand thinking as an adult that being taught to love your neighbor is what radicalized you.

but can we not all act like we dont remember any history at all? mass graves are still being found all across canada, and the catholic church has only issued an apology to the first nations communities very recently (and there have been no material reparations afaik.) as someone with taino ancestry, i have to grapple with what the church did to my ancestors every day. i have to deal with the language and the religion of the colonizer if i ever want to engage in my heritage. but no, please go on about how "the only real catholics are the good ones." please ignore what opus dei is, and the history of conservatism in the church. its not a shiny perfect wonderful place. did we all forget about the priests and the altar boys? did we forget about centuries of colonialism? the spanish inquisition?

i understand where most people are coming from in this discussion. its a lot of millennial liberals who have very little knowledge of catholic politics and who grew up going to mass a few times a year and thats kinda it. and there very well could be a lot of people who learned empathy from the church! you might have genuinely been radicalized to the left by the teachings of jesus! but for the vast majority of catholics, the only radicalization happening is right wing radicalization, convert or not!!

the church i went to in middle school was the only church that organized protests outside of planned parenthood. they were on mission trips (colonizing) and preaching about modesty and following the orders of your father. the majority of cradle catholics are, in fact, deeply conservative. theres a reason the catholic church was, up until evangelical mega churches blew up, the main conservative power group in america. where do yall think the hayes code comes from? like im just genuinely baffled. do yall not know about opus dei? do yall not know that the church you are so desperately defending from protestants is like. where all the conservative beliefs in protestantism come from? im just genuinely baffled.

i didnt really bring up pope francis because i am genuinely conflicted talking about him, but obviously his death and the selection of the new pope is why everyone is talking about the catholic church. and like. ok yeah i loved francis. i bawled my eyes out when he died and i am genuinely mourning him. but he was not a perfect person. no leader of the church is going to fundamentally go against its core teachings. this isnt the young pope. was francis one of the most progressive popes we have ever had? yes 100%. was he still deeply conservative about many issues? also yes! you can hate the church if you want to, everyone who does has every right to do so. and if you love the church, it is your responsibility not to fall into the "no true scotsman" fallacy. the church is a deeply conservative place and has done immense harm. you cannot ignore that. and acting holier than thou about protestants on tiktok isnt gonna get you into heaven.

[pennkquest]

Alright, I'll bite. (Sparked by this post) I'm gonna preface this with some context: 

First off: I'm Black in case you're unaware

Huxley is my favorite speaker. Full stop. You ask me to choose, it’ll always be him. 

Likewise, you ask for my favorite listeners, I will say Starlight and Darlin'. (I'll save my Starlight rant for another day)

My designs for both Huxley and Darlin are Black.

With this in mind, I want to be clear from the jump: I don’t have an inherent problem with these headcanons. If I did, I wouldn’t have chosen then myself. That said, I have noticed that Hux and Darlin are, more often than not, the characters that get headcanoned as POC (specifically Black) in design rosters. In some cases, they are the only POC designs present. Why is that?

Furthermore, the more often I notice this pattern so to speak, the more I sit and think about why those headcanons are so popular. I find my answer when I think about the characters I see headcanoned as white most often. Tell me why it’s "practically canon" for Lasko to be pale with light/white hair. Tell me why white Sam "just makes sense". Why? Because Lasko's a nerdy ball of nerves that stumbles over his words? Because Sam’s a sweet Southern man at heart? Those are not inherently white attributes.

Except they're treated as such. They go virtually unchallenged because they're so widely accepted by fandom. People see these personalities and character details and come up with their vision. So, let's apply that to Huxley and Darlin, shall we?

Huxley: Athlete. Canonically implied to be big, as indicated by statements made by him and other members of the DAMN crew. Classified as a himbo with parallels in Imperium highlighting how some will view him as stupid. Overall chill vibe.

Darlin: Reckless with their safety. Known to lash out/lose control of their emotions when they’re not actively hiding them. Gets injured often because they’re too stubborn to run from trouble. An overall intense demeanor that makes them difficult to approach (at least at first). 

Explain to me why this screams Black to so many people. Is it because Huxley's a dumb jock who you imagine gets stoned all the time? Oh, is it perhaps because Darlin is just so aggressive compared to your Golden Retriever-coded Asher, needing to be calmed down by everyone around them? And here's the thing: I can already imagine people saying, "That's not why I made them Black". Then explain why it "just makes sense" for them to Black. Why them out of a sea of characters? Make it make sense.

Now let me make this clear as well: I'm not expecting every headcanon to have elaborate thought behind it. For one, I get that some people take a more casual approach with designs and such. Not every choice has to have a reason or justification behind it. But when literally 95% of the Huxley designs I see are Black and half of y'all don't even know what a fucking durag is? Saying it leaves a bad taste in my mouth is putting it lightly.

You know what I wish I saw more of? Black Huxleys and Darlins with attached nuance.

Give me a Black Darlin who struggles to articulate how they feel with the people in their lives because they haven't been readily given the language to do so. You want to pair a Black Darlin with a White Sam? Why not talk about how POC have an insanely difficult time getting support from the medical system so not only does it explain why Darlin is so resistant to go to healers, but also gives an extra weight to the fact that Sam was their absolute last resort when injured? Give me a Black Darlin who has been taught their entire life that no one will have their back, that they need to learn how to depend on themself alone, and that's the reason why they struggle to feel like the pack would've cared when the Quinn shit went on.

You wanna talk Black Huxleys? Let's touch on how he's learned to control his emotions/anger because he knows how people will take it if it comes from someone who looks like him. Talk about how his moms teaching him not to use violence speaks to a deeper desire for him not to be viewed as a threat because they fear for his life otherwise. In one of his BAs, he mentions how a lot of people used to sleep with him/flirt with him solely because of his body and he could tell. Do you know how often black men are sexualized and fetishized? Why not talk about it through him? I see people explore that concept through Gavin constantly, where's the energy for Huxley? You wanna make him Black so bad, why not actually put some thought behind it? Because right now, it seems like he gets the "luxury" of being the token Black guy in the DAMN friend group at best.

I know a lot of people are probably going to dismiss this post. I am already anticipating that as I write this. But I'm so tired of pretending like this shit doesn't get to me. Because it does. I've got no intentions of leaving this fandom because I have met so many amazing people and adore Erik's content immensely. But what I am going to do is talk about the widespread normalization of attributing certain personality traits to certain racial groups. Because the non-white people in this fandom deserve better than that.

[queerbrownvegan]

What Queer Ecology Taught Me About Survival, Belonging, and Love. 🌈🌎

Did it ever occur to you that the animals, plants, and fungi might be queer? If not, that is exhibit A in our case for the importance of Queer Ecology, a field that challenges our heteronormative, cisnormative, and anthropocentric views of the natural world. It recognizes the fluidity and diversity of identities and relationships in both human and non-human realms. It aims to foster inclusive relationships with the environment and life that encompass and celebrate its broad spectrum, rather than limit it. It collapses systems of oppression and blooms a new regenerative perspective.

A Queer Ecological History

Understanding Queer ecology can be confusing for many of those who do not interact with academic institutions. The praxis of queer ecology is understood through how we perceive the binary concepts of natural and unnatural. Who is natural, and why are Queer bodies seen as unnatural? Who deems us unnatural, and why?

I was born in Los Angeles, California, and as a young Mexican-American, my identity or sexuality was not allowed to express deviance from the norm. It was simple, I was born a boy, meant to fall in love with a girl. Any other thoughts, expressions, or embodiments of feminine acts were seen as an error in my genetic code. My early life was marked by disappointment from my parents and their attempts to mold me multiple times.

Due to my rebellious nature as a youth, I uprooted and challenged harmful narratives that were attempted to be inflicted on me. I love my parents today, we’ve done a lot of healing, and I am privileged to have a healthy relationship with them now.

As a teenager, I worked weekends from 8 AM to 6 PM in the gardens of affluent people in the Los Angeles region with my father. I usually wore a long, red flannel shirt, huge dark denim jeans, leather-welted boots, and a straw hat to protect my body from the intense solar rays. I was always forced to remove the weeds that I saw as revolting against uniformity and presenting true diversity.

Dandelions are sacred yet seen as hindrances. Any mushroom was seen as deadly, poisonous, and a representation of toxicity, but I saw it as a system that recycles and removes toxicity from life. The fauna were seen as pests, and I was forced to spray harmful chemicals to remove them when they only tried to find their way back home.

My dad and older brother did more of the heavier work by climbing trees, and sometimes I joined them, almost falling myself, but thanks to my extended height, I was able to catch myself.

These species were like me, trying to find their home in what they thought was a shared space. Slowly, I began to understand that my passion for environmentalism stemmed from a place of brutal isolation, a place where I could explore the pain that resided in the corridors of my heart.

As the years went by, I slowly became a small shell of myself, too sick to breathe the seas of sleep and believing that I belonged nowhere because I was Queer. I found the eeriness of the lost forests and outdoor spaces to be a place to grieve. A place for pain so deep that I knew only the species that didn’t speak my language knew how to guide me back to my ancestors. I was feeling soulless and slowly started to climb from what seemed like endless vines against a cliff, a pathway that held my head high as I searched for the glistening light.

Bi-sexual! No, gay! Wait, Queer is who I am. I hated conforming to societal boxes. It was almost as if people needed to know one answer when multiple answers existed in my head. I had fallen in love with a woman before, a man, and someone who was non-binary. All of these experiences taught me about different portals into worlds I could live in, yet they allowed me to connect with the broader struggles of all gender-diverse groups.

One of the reasons I love being queer is because it’s an expansive identity and way of seeing the world. When I talk to some gay men, they don’t always understand that my attraction to gender-diverse people often shows up through conversations, art, literature, and culture. That is also a form of intimacy rather than the idea we have of having to be in physical contact (i.e, kissing, holding hands, etc).

It’s not that I won’t end up with a man (because I already know I will, lol), but my view of love is rooted in abundance, not limitation. And queerness also varies per individual, my view may be different than my peers and that’s okay too. But being able to come into my queerness when I was 22 allowed me to finally come back home to who I truly was.

I had formed a community, fallen in love, and fallen out of love, and I remembered that the moment I started to live for others was when I was disarming myself. Life became bright, joyous, and queer when I stepped into power.

Why is queer ecology important?

The world we live in is queer. This isn’t a personal opinion; it is a scientific fact. Scientists have observed non-binary, homosexual, transgender, and intersex relationships and identities occurring as naturally in ecosystems as their hetero/cisnormative counterparts. Or rather, ecological relationships (ecosystems) don’t exist within binaries, but instead occupy a full spectrum of existence.

Queer ecology offers us a critical lens through which to understand these relationships, beyond the narrative of the binary. When we’re limited or fixed in what we know as natural versus unnatural, or appropriate versus deviant, we misinterpret the world around us.

Hetero/cisnormative perspectives assert views like sex being based primarily on biological reproduction and these values go on to shape human interactions with their environment, other humans, and non-human animals. What might happen if we prescribe values outside of cis and heteronormative norms? Queering nature is our connection to an expansive view that examines the wide possibilities of relationships, not their limits.

What it Means to be a Queer Environmentalist

I’ve always struggled with what it means to be a Queer environmentalist. Sometimes I say nothing. Being a queer environmentalist implies that I value multi-species liberation and recognize that we live in a world of curiosity and connection, where there is no single answer to how we should live.

It means that I wish to see white supremacist systems be collapsed and to recognize the queer ecological histories and eulogies of the Queer / Trans BIPOC leaders who have come before me and honor them in my work. Especially in a time where transphobia is at a rise and our Trans siblings have the highest rates of deaths yet they are the ones who have always and continue to be at the forefront of Trans / Queer liberation.

But the reality is that my love for environmentalism exists on an expansionary scale rather than a fixed value. Throughout my life, my passion has taken different forms of expression, whether through movement, literature, music, or writing. I’ve had several mystery-based experiences with people throughout the world, where we never seem to be able to describe our care for each other, but instead envelop ourselves through embodiments of care.

Perhaps that is how we have forgotten the lost stories of species around us, primarily the non-human, in how they interact, not just to stay alive but also to enjoy themselves in a world that is constantly changing.

Queer ecology belongs in our movements

In the United States, there has been a record increase in anti-LGBTQ+ hate crimes, movements, and legislation that seek to block or challenge the existence of these individuals. This may as well be Exhibit B. The idea that humans and nature are separate, and the dominance of this idea in our culture, is made apparent within these perspectives. We know from the environmental justice movement, and the BIPOC communities where it originated, that our environments and our bodies are inseparable. The environment in which a person lives is the most significant determinant of their health.

Queer ecology has a practical role in social justice movements, especially as queer populations are often at-risk, and face social and environmental violence, and health and economic disparity. Without this inclusive perspective, there is a perpetuation of violence, exclusion, displacement, and exploitation. A glance at the vast history of life on Earth reveals that diversity is the foundation of life. If we examine nature through a queer lens, we can approach our issues more holistically. We gain an understanding of kinship and connection that crosses boundaries.

For a long time, nature has been treated as separate from humans. This perspective became a foundation for modern environmentalism, seeking to “protect” nature from humans. This same perspective has been romanticized in popular and past environmental literature and it helped enable the erasure and removal of Indigenous peoples. Culture and nature were treated and viewed as separate, and Indigenous peoples were removed by colonizers, upholding this worldview.

This is relevant to queer ecology as it seeks to critically analyze and go beyond our binary perspectives, which are often associated with hetero/cisnormative values. When we explore the world of possibilities available to us beyond these binaries, we become more inclined to challenge the logic behind displacement and environmental violence, create inclusive systems, and form bridges between different ways of seeing and being. Queer ecology can lead to openmindedness.

This has practical implications, as cis/heteronormative views have shaped our public institutions, environmental policies, and our relationship to nature. Environmental scholars like Catriona Sandilands have pointed out that Indigenous removal from wilderness preserves serves as one example, but we can also examine how institutions like the public park and other urban green spaces present gendered and racialized biases. Urban parks are designed to create specific types of nature experiences. The easiest way to illustrate this is to examine what is allowed and what is not allowed in these spaces.

For example, having a green space for playgrounds, sports, dog walks, and birthdays addresses some of the common uses found in urban parks today. However, a queer community might place more value on a closed sexual space, a safe place for expression of desire and gathering. The answer isn’t necessarily to have sex in parks. But instead what do queer healthy spaces look like too?

Still, this understanding reveals that the design of parks as a public institution is rooted in heterosexual communities and their health. This cisnormative view of health begs the question: how might queer communities have different possible uses? These are precisely the types of questions and perspectives that queer ecology invites us to explore, and the norms to challenge on a journey to an understanding of humanity that is as diverse and inclusive as life on earth.

In an academic sense…

The origins of queer ecology were first examined through queer theory in Michel Foucault’s work, The History of Sexuality, published in 1976. Environmental scholar and writer, Catriona Sandilands, went on to conceptualize queer ecology and cites Michel Foucault as laying the groundwork for the connections she drew later on. Her book, Queer Ecologies: Sex, Nature, Politics, Desire, gained recognition for providing a comprehensive analysis of the intersections between sexuality and environmentalism. In 1990, Judith Butler explored the concept of gender as performance in her book, Gender Trouble: Feminism and the Subversion of Identity. Translating this idea into a queer ecological framework suggests that humans that categorize “nature” and “culture” as separate are performing those differences. From a scientific perspective, nature more accurately exists in a flow and system of interactions, rather than any determined and fixed states. Queer ecology also has close ties to ecological feminist theory.

The ideas behind queer ecology have evolved into new narratives that celebrate diversity and promote rights for the LGBTQ+ community. From “Climate of Gender” by Callum Angus:

“Trees and people live in transition now, perhaps permanently, and I do not think this is all bad. Such a shift in climatic thinking requires accepting loss sometimes, and remembering where we’ve been, what we’ve done wrong, and a willingness to find new things beautiful. It requires recognizing the beauty in new definitions of gender, allowing the expansiveness and creativity of trans people to revise what we thought was known about gender in the past. It requires adaptation to new seasonal rhythms, yes, but adaptation with an awareness that this is not the first time whole societies have been forced to adapt to change they didn’t want, and a willingness to listen to those communities with much more respect than we have in the past.”

As a trans male, Angus draws connections between his experience transitioning and the transitions happening as a result of the climate crisis, suggesting that it presents an opportunity for reckoning. Queer ecology helps us gain a deeper understanding that the environment and marginalized communities face parallel struggles for their right to exist, while informing us on how to create a more inclusive and sustainable world.

Organizations that center queer identities and ecology, such as Queer Nature, demonstrate how queer ecology can manifest as a practice, in addition to a framework or lifestyle. Their work envisions and implements ecological awareness and outdoor self-efficacy skills, including bushcraft, plant identification, and tactical skills. In our daily lives and environmental practices, queer ecology encourages us to question our assumptions and embrace diversity in all aspects of our lives, fostering a world where we all belong. It invites us to reflect on our environmental identities (an interconnected concept of self), challenge our consumptive or extractive behaviors, and promote inclusivity in our art, spaces, systems, institutions, and policies.

Queer ecology is an ever-expansive field and there is always new analysis and dialogue to be held. In my view of work for queer ecology, I am not an expert in this field, but rather someone who wants to share my story about queerness. One that was rooted in resilience after turmoil, trying to find abundance, is the cornerstone around the world that enables me to continue doing the work I do today. I still see that our LGBTQ+ communities are suffering worldwide. I fear that we are entering a world where there will be more hate than love, and that in our interpersonal relationships, we struggle to build intimacy.

However, amidst the despair I see around the world, there is always beauty blossoming in the bleak landscape. I see myself as someone who was born bleak, yet beautiful. There are many aspects of myself that I have begun to love again, which I thought had wilted when I was young. This is the beauty of aging in an evolving field: you get to rediscover the world from a more compassionate perspective. And that’s why queer ecology keeps me alive not because of seeing gay penguins but because somewhere in my lineage there was also someone who was Queer that carried the desire to care, love, and nurtue for others despite going through hardship.

Solving the climate crisis requires us to develop a deeper understanding of the world around us and the complexity of relationships that have enabled life to thrive. Queer ecology represents a pathway to this understanding. If we don’t recognize and celebrate the diversity in the world around us, we risk losing it all. As younger generations rally around intersectionality, there’s a chance to lay a foundation for new stories. Angus ends “Climate of Gender” with these final lines:

Perhaps future civilizations will tell stories in which wildly oscillating weather patterns at the turn of the twenty-first century were the result of great planetwide suffering. Or they might inherit a legend that tells how great change sparked great cooperation in nourishing the land and each other because, as is often the case with transition, the possibility for new stories opened up.

By Isaias Hernandez, @queerbrownvegan

[wisteria-lodge]

bird primary + burnt snake secondary

 tl;dr: Fairly sure I'm Lion primary (maybe burned Badger since I sort of envy the idea of close communities, or hedonistic Snake, not sure where that line is)

(the way that divide works out is that basically, Burnt Badgers look like Snakes. They have the Snake's small community, but wish they could cast their net wider. Hedonistic Snakes tend to be more solo, and much more focused on /stuff/. Also, both options make pretty good short-term coping mechanisms.)

but unsure whether my secondary is Bird, Snake/burned Snake, or burned Lion.

I love researching and reverse-engineering and my immediate response to situations is to Google advice, but reactively, not proactively. I am allergic to planning, and prepwork feels stifling and unnatural.

Ooooh, have we got a single-player Environment Snake? (I also think of these as MacGyver Snakes.) Basically just pulling at the things around you in order to solve the problem at hand.

I studied math in college then did a coding bootcamp, and I always felt adrift because both only taught memorizing solutions to individual problems/proofs, not how to solve unfamiliar ones -- i.e., really learning. 

However, I neither consider myself flexible nor want to be, and singleplayer Snake is wayyyyyyyyyyyy more comfortable than stuff involving other people. (Complicating factor: not neurotypical.)

I think I can say, pretty confidently, that this system works just fine if you're not neurotypical. :) There's no reason you have to use the multi-player version if you don't want. The most dramatic single/multi player divide is probably Bookkeeper Badger vs Courtier Badger, and there are lots of people who prefer being just one or the other.

I do the "faces" thing reflexively, in the moment, but it doesn't feel like "shifting" or "becoming" anything: just me, lying.

That's Snake. "Becoming" is more of a word that a Courtier Badger would use, they kinda do have to believe it, or it doesn't work. Snake secondaries are a lot more aware of what they're doing, in the moment.

It's interesting that you are just straight-up using the word lie though. In my experience, Snakes are more likely to conceptualize that particular problem-solving strategy as "say it in a way they'll listen to," or something like that. You might just be super direct (and/or like hanging out in Neutral) buuuut... the negativity of "lie" can sometimes point to a Burnt secondary. No sign of that yet, but I'll keep an eye out for it.

I don't have a moral problem with lying; it's often even right since a) telling the truth often hurts people, and b) people do prefer it: most people want to hear what they want to hear, and if that happens to be the truth that's great.

Hmmm. This is sounding like primary stuff. And it's quite reasoned out, which makes me interested in hearing why you went for Lion primary instead of Bird.

But deep down, I guess I resent it. I wish that when I say what I mean it would convince people rather than create problems. I try to ration that to only things that REALLY matter to me, but tbh many things do. I hate arguing.

What I'm hearing here is the Bird primary fantasy of "If I was only able to explain it exactly right, in precisely the right words, then everyone would agree with me." And as you say earlier, it doesn't actually work like that. It sounds like you're feeling a bit cynical in regards to other people a the moment, and I can't exactly blame you.

I would love to be an inspirational secondary but I am bad at inspiring people.

There is definitely some burnt secondary talk going on here.

Family: I'm not close to my father -- he’s a terrible person, serial cheater, racist, etc. I'm closer to my mother, and don't think she's a bad person, but both parents were hypercritical and have horrible tempers, so my childhood felt horrible to live through since I was always getting yelled at or having corporal punishment used for doing something wrong.

Definitely seeing where the burned secondary energy is coming from, if so many of your formative experiences involved being told that the way you were doing things was wrong. I also see why you might have at least a fascination with the confident, firey, speak-your-truth-and-damn-the-consequences Lion secondary.

(On paper this could be called abusive, and anyone else being subjected to this makes me furious, but I'm not fully comfortable with the label for my situation, even though I know that's inconsistent.) 

I understand, and I appreciate that. I also appreciate your carefully articulated position, and it's slanting me in the direction of Bird primary. Even though this is obviously a topic you are very emotional about, all those emotions are arranged within the framework of thought. You're aware of and okay the fact that you feel all kinds of different ways about what happened.

Any secondary model came from my mom, but I don't know about primary. She always says my sister and I are "the most important things in her life." (One of the reasons I don’t want kids is that I don’t think I could ever believe or promise them that.) She ostensibly also hates my father and their divorce was vicious, but she kept working for him until he retired, goes on trips with him to see my sister or me, and pressured me for years to un-estrange him because “after all, he’s family” until I gave in and now pretend to have a relationship just enough to placate them. I don't have any ethical problems doing this, it's just irritating.

That is very, very unusual family dynamic. Have to get my head around that. Your mom may have some very intense Badger going on, especially with the the whole "after all, he's family" thing. That could fit go with a nasty divorce, especially if she thought his presence was a threat to you and your sister. On the other hand, she might just be able to compartmentalize to an insane degree, which would probably point to Bird secondary.

I don't understand this aspect of my mom; I observe it happening, but I don't understand it. It feels kind of sad, in an existential way. 

Honestly, I agree.

(Another way my dad sucks is that he played favorites with my sister and I, me being the favorite.

Being the Golden Child sucks just as much as being the Problem Child.

The shitty resulting dynamic is I only "care about" his approval to avoid him creating drama that ripples to everyone around him -- he's gotten better but he has literally started shit when I didn't end emails with "love" -- but my sister actually cares about his approval, and it hurts her.)

Secondary-wise, my mom would always harp on me to "pay attention to the people and things around you," and whenever I tell her about solving problems in Snakeish ways she's like "way to go, [me]!" But she also is meticulously planned and scheduled and organized, and hates surprises and not knowing exactly what will happen. She's the kind of person who gets frustrated in April when I haven’t told her my Thanksgiving itinerary, which, like... I don't want to think that far ahead.

She could be either Prep-work secondary, Bird or Badger. If she's a Bird, "pay attention to the people and things around you," points to a a Rapid-Fire Bird (which can look *very* Snakey.) Or it could be a way of describing Courtier Badger. Being that scheduled is more often a Bird thing... but I could also imagine a Badger manifesting like that, especially if she is so concerned with specifically planning holidays.

Low-stakes/high-stakes problem that felt good: This is a high-stakes problem containing a low-stakes problem. I'm rolling them together because they illustrate both aspects of my problem solving.

Higher stakes: That coding bootcamp required being on Zoom 8 hours every day. But I had 3 roommates (part of why I did it was to not have 3 roommates), and they didn't want me there that much. I can't go to coffee shops because either they're loud, or I will make them loud by talking for 8 hours, thus becoming the problem. Coworking spaces are expensive af. I even consider renting a storage unit but I don't think they have power and wifi. The idea I settle on is sneaking onto a nearby college campus: preferably the CS building, to blend in. I scour the college subreddit for posts about what buildings let students in without ID, then scout them out (this is March, the thing doesn't start until May, I'm just high on must-solve-now energy). After ~15 minutes (lol) of walking through campus I decide I've had enough, seems doable. The day of, I leave early in case I have to give up and go home, but that turned out to be completely pointless because tailgating in is shockingly easy. Like it's scary how easy it is. One day a security officer stopped me but even he eventually let me in after I acted increasingly frazzled and panicked -- not ENTIRELY an act but I definitely was playing it up.

I like this story. And I feel good about saying that it is QUITE snakey: what do I have immediately around me, and how can I use it to get what I want in this moment? Even little details like - you're not bothering to come up with a cover story or borrow/forge someone's ID. If you're caught you'll talk your way out of it. You did a little research, then scoped the place out, then were good to go.

Lower stakes: I usually did classes from an empty auditorium (students weren't supposed to be there but no one checked, and also I'm not a student right?). The whiteboard's eraser stand was a few inches away from the wall, and one day I drop my phone in the gap. Shit. The gap's way too high to reach down. I can't ask anyone for help because I'm already 2 layers deep of being somewhere I'm not supposed to be. The stand screws to the wall, but I don't have a screwdriver because who just carries a screwdriver around? (For whatever reason, going to a hardware store didn't occur to me.) I stare at the thing until I realize: I am literally in the ENGINEERING building. I search various offices, ask people for a screwdriver, but no luck. Then I see a board listing the departments. One floor has a "makerspace," and somehow, its door is wide open (the student lounge is locked down but the room with deadly power tools isn't, ???) I grab 5 sizes of screwdriver, then also grab duct tape and a ruler to fish my phone out in case the screwdrivers don't work, which turned out to be a good idea because they didn't

Sounds to me to me like you just MacGyvered a solution :D

One thing I am picking up on is your subtle critique of the existing rules/systems. Getting in via tailgateing is easier than it should be, talking your way past the guard was too easy. The door with the powertools really should be locked, etc. It's making me (again) think Bird primary for you. You've very tuned into the way things run, and how well designed (or not) that is. There's also just a little bit of Birdy rules-lawyer in "Students aren't allowed in this room, but I'm not a student (because I snuck in.)"

Hard decision-making process…. I don’t know. I don’t experience many decisions as hard. I often know what I want to do right away; the difficult part is doing it.

In the language of this system, that's a Burnt secondary.

Or I know what I should do, am obligated to do, have no choice but to do, etc., though sometimes it feels miserable or wrong, like resignation.

Unfortunately that is what it feels like to have a Burnt secondary - you just use whatever problem-solving strategy you can at random, since they all feel like a chore and it doesn't really matter.

I can feel proud of making certain "right" choices in an abstract self-congratulatory way, but I never like it or really feel good about it. I either act on something immediately or put it off until the decision makes itself, a drop-dead deadline approaches, I get bored/impulsive enough to do it on the spot, or I suddenly swerve my life toward something I like better.

You're definitely an Improvisational secondary. Which is really fine, even though I know it doesn't feel that way all the time when you come from a family of intense Prep-work people. Just keep an eye on that 'wait until the deadline' impulse. It's very, very common for neurodivergent people to use that last-minute stress adrenaline to kind of hack their brain, and it's not sustainable.

I'd wanted to change careers for years but the actual decision to do the bootcamp was an impulse based on ~3 hours' research the day I encountered it.

That can absolutely work though. You *are* working on the problem and mulling it over in your head long term, even if you are (in the words of another snake secondary) "waiting for the opportune moment."

This is all healthy and well-adjusted, and it definitely has never caused any predictable problems! (Did get a job though.)

Hey, if it's stupid and it works, it's not stupid.

My fantasy: To be successful and well-known in my field; to create the kind of art I want to create and have it be respected/influential. To live the life I want, with the aesthetic I want, and the opportunities from others and follow-through from me to achieve that. The details vary based on the field but that's the general template. 

I'd say that's a very human fantasy, without too many details that slant me one way or the other, in terms of this system. There's definitely a focus on the community around you and how you relate to it/integrate into it. And that makes me think Bird (the external primary) is more likely than Lion (the internal primary.)

Characters: I relate to characters who are flawed in the same ways I am -- they feel like cautionary tales -- or sometimes via empathizing in a way the story doesn’t (Carlotta from Phantom got done DIRTY).

It's interesting that you respond to characters who the narrative framing doesn't support, because the narrative framing doesn't support them. I guess that does fit with your interest in constructed systems, and if they're useful/functional or not. Which points to Bird.

On that big pop culture character test I always get Hannah from Girls and Gaius Baltar from Battlestar Galactica: harsh, but not wrong.

(I always get Inara from Firefly and Céline from Before Sunrise.)

It's been a second since I've seen Girls or Battlestar Galactica, but I do think that both of those characters are Bird Snakes, which is honestly impressive since Bird Snakes are easily the least common fictional archetype.

Baltar is clever, adaptive, reactive, he pulls from around him. He also bluffs and will *act* like he's an expert when he really isn't. A lot of his internal conflict revolves around extremely Bird primary rationalization - is this situation really his fault? and if it is, what is he morally/rationally supposed to do about it (if anything?) "Voice of *a* generation" Hannah also has this way of getting caught in her own feedback loops when trying to figure herself out. One of my favorite moments is the bit where she loses her purse on the way back from the wedding, and then rides the train all the way to Coney Island, sits on the beach and eats the slice of wedding cake while watching the sun rise. I think that's beautiful, and a very Snake secondary response.

I also gravitate toward a specific archetype: Blanche from A Streetcar Named Desire, Madame Bovary, Violetta from La Traviata. People who desire an impossible thing deeply and unshakably, temporarily achieve it, and are taken down dramatically.

Now that, I'm thinking is a story structure that you like. And/or you're drawn to these tragic great ladies, living most of the way in a fantasy world. It's a good, cathartic archetype.

What makes me feel powerful: I don’t really resonate with that framing. The closest is that feeling like I have no options is the same for me as feeling powerless.

Okay, "not feeling powerless," I'll take it. And we're back to that Burnt secondary again. I'm hoping you'll leave your Snake a little more room to breathe and play, because it seems like you're a pretty capable person. You manage to do the things you want to get done, and you have an excellent awareness of what are good and bad situations, both for you and just in general.

Thank you to anonymous for such an excellent submission. If you'd like a Sorting of your very own, commissions are open on my ko-fi. :D

If you'd like to read more about the system I'm using, my explanation is right here.

[ariesqueencobra]

what we used to be | lX

Pairing: Eli Moskowitz x Fem!Reader

Summary: A victory party commences and you're noticing some red flags but maybe your love for Eli is enough to oversee it.

Warnings: Hawk being Hawk, bullying, kissing, swearing

Word Count: 2.2k

A/N: Season 2 has begun! I can't wait to write out the upcoming chapters cause I really think there's so much drama (and your girl loves drama)! Also would love to hear some feedback about this story! Send in an ask or comment!

Thank you to those who already reblog and comment, I see you and I love you all for it!

I don't consent to this work being copied, translated or reposted.

“So you might be wondering what a team does after they win the championship,” Aisha smiled into the camera. “The answer? Victor nachos!” She panned over the plate of nachos ordered for the table.

You cheered as you clinked your glasses together. 

“It was supposed to be a round of drinks but the waitress was not feeling Hawk’s fake ID,” Aisha said. 

Your eyes widened and you stifled a laugh at the look on Eli’s face. 

“Hey, don’t talk about that, my parents follow you,” he whispered. 

You chewed on your lip, suppressing a smile when Aisha apologized to his parents directly. 

“No mercy, bitches,” she closed off before joining the three of you.

Now that the weekend was here, you went for a victory dinner with your friends. Demitri tagged along as well. 

While you were still mad at Eli, you both haven’t spoken about the night of the tournament. You continued to text about anything else, but it was evident something was going on based on the space between the two of you and the fact that you hadn’t kissed since then.

“I gotta say, it’s kinda nice to be at a victory party,” Demitri grinned, pulling you from your thoughts, and grabbing a nacho from the plate. 

A smile appeared on your face. Demitri wasn’t a part of Cobra Kai, so you were glad he was able to share this moment with you, even if your boyfriend disagreed.

“Yeah, except you had nothing to do with the victory,” Eli smirked, taking the nacho right out of his best friend’s hand. 

“Well, I like to consider this a belated party for the coding competition we won at computer camp,” Demitri answered. “Remember?” 

Your eyes lit up at the mention of that. It was a lonely two weeks for you, not having anyone to hang out with or talk to, but the moment they arrived back, you were so excited to hear their stories. Especially their song, which Demitri happened to be singing at the moment.

Aisha burst out in laughter at the corniness and you joined in, only because of the way Demitri started dancing.

“Hey, cool it with the nerd shit, huh?” Eli whispered to Demitri. 

Your smile fell for a brief moment and you wondered what that was about. Sending a comforting glance at Demitri, you knew he was taken aback at the sudden outburst.

“Is Miguel around? His wings are getting cold,” you gestured to his food, deciding to focus on something else.

“He’s probably moping about Sam,” Aisha said. 

“We should probably go check on him,” your boyfriend said.

You slid out of the booth so Eli could leave, and when you sat back down, you were met with a knowing look from Demitri. 

“What’s going on with you?” He looked at you concerned.

“Is it that obvious?” You raised a brow, crossing your arms on the table. 

“Seeing as I’ve known you the majority of my life, I will say yeah,” he blew out a breath, passing you a lopsided grin. “I also know you well enough to know it has something to do with Hawk,” he mocked your boyfriend’s nickname and with how you were feeling, you couldn’t help but let out a small laugh.

It died down quickly when your attention was focused back on what happened.

“You saw what he did to Robby,” you began, playing with your fingers. “Sensei taught us not to show mercy, but,” you ended the thought and shook your head, brows furrowed. “What happened to Eli?”

He sighed before taking a deep breath. “I’ve been asking myself the same thing,” he shrugged.

“Don’t get me wrong, I love his confidence,” you said. “But this is borderline psycho,” you pointed out. “And when did your guys’ theme song become lame?!” You exclaimed. “He’s changing more each day,” your voice fell solemn. “And now I’m not sure if I like it.”

“I know, it sucks but,” he paused, licking his lips. “Just take a breath,” he reassured, patting your hand gently. “Talk to him, I think he’d still listen to you.”

“Yeah,” you nodded. You pressed your lips together and you both stayed there, holding hands in comfort. When your boyfriend came back, his brows creased as he stared at your held hands. You sighed as you pulled away.

“What the hell’s going on?”

You took in a breath as you glanced at Demitri, his look telling you it was okay. “We need to talk,” you said, standing up from the booth. 

His demeanor changed, worry filling him but he nodded, following you outside.

“What’s going on?” Eli asked, sitting next to you on the curb while you hugged yourself. He pulled you into his side.

You shut your eyes, welcoming it and finding comfort in his embrace.

“I don’t know,” you licked your lips. “You tell me,” you inhaled.

He sighed, maneuvering so you were facing the same way, his hand on your arm. “I’m not gonna apologize for what I did to Robby,” his voice was calm. 

“I’ll forget about it for this reason, but I’m still waiting on my apology for what you said,” you stared down at your interlocked hands, running your thumb against his knuckles. 

“I didn’t mean what you thought I meant, I wouldn’t hurt you, ever,” he brushed his lips over your forehead. “I’m sorry.”

“What about Demitri?”

“What about him?”

“Binary Brothers,” you said.

“I don’t like that nerd shit anymore,” he scoffed. “It’s loser talk.”

“They’re memories, who cares if you went to computer camp?”

“I care,” he stated. 

“You don’t have to lose yourself completely,” you looked up at him. “You can still like computers and be badass.”

“You don’t understand,” he shook his head. “I can’t go back to that, to that life. Things are perfect right now and I can’t let anyone ruin it, not even Demitri,” he gulped. 

Your face fell when you realized it before you reached up to cup his cheek.

“I understand,” you pressed your forehead against his. “More than you know,” you leaned in to kiss him. “You can be nicer to Demitri though,” you pulled away. “He’s your best friend.”

He didn’t respond, only looking out onto the street. 

You followed his gaze and it went unspoken that things were good now.

~

You were talking to Aisha when the bell rang at the entrance. You smiled as you greeted your boyfriend, cupping the sides of his face and going in for a kiss. You were happy that things were okay, no more silent arguing or rough patches, and you could return to having a boyfriend.

“Hi, babe,” he greeted, hand on your waist.

“What the hell happened here?” Miguel asked, referring to the broken mirror and fire damage on the wall.

“Looks like Sensei threw a party,” Aisha shrugged.

You rested your hands on your belt as you listened.

“Must have been pretty sick if fire got involved,” Eli smirked, shrugging off his bag. 

You hiked your shoulders up before the four of you made your way onto the mat.

The new students gathered inside, wondering what happened as well, their mummers were loud but were cut short as Sensei appeared, kicking them out.

“Everyone, fall in!” He instructed the class once everyone left. He walked over to the front of the class. He didn’t seem pleased even compared to his normal state of being intense.

“Must’ve been a rager, Sensei,” Eli said, smirking.

You raised a brow in amusement as Miguel continued.

“Were you celebrating all weekend?” 

“Celebrating what? That my students are a bunch of pussies?” He asked, face filled with anger.

You furrowed your brows, unsure of what he meant.

“Diaz, Hawk, upfront,” he snapped his fingers.

The two boys glanced at each other, confusion written on their faces before they complied.

Sensei stalked behind them before he began. “Hawk. Did you attack your opponent when his back was turned?” He asked.

Eli raised a brow, glancing over his shoulder. Reluctance filled his features before he responded. “Yes, Sensei,” he said, swallowing down any hesitation and keeping a stern face on.

Sensei narrowed his gaze before moving to Miguel. “Diaz, did you purposely attack your opponent’s injury?” 

“Yes, Sensei,” he responded with more assurance, but still he held that look of confusion.

“You think that makes you badass?” Sensei circled them, facing them.

Neither could answer.

“Miss Robinson! Miss L/N!” Sensei shouted.

“Yes, Sensei,” you both responded.

“Two cobras in the jungle. One kills the strongest lion, the other kills an injured monkey. Which cobra do you wanna be?”

“The one that kills the lion, Sensei,” you responded in union.

“And why is that?”

“Because it killed a stronger animal,” you said.

“Correct!” He yelled, conviction in his tone. “Cobra Kai is about being badass. And the baddest badass is when he beats his opponent when he’s at his strongest!” His voice raised. “Not when his back is turned!” He screamed directly in Eli’s face. “Not when he’s injured!” He did the same to Miguel. “Is that understood?” He turned to the class. 

“Yes, Sensei!” You responded with the rest of the class, a crease between your brows as you looked at your boyfriend.

“That means no more cheating, no more fighting dirty, from here on out those are pussy moves and you don’t wanna be pussies.”

“No, Sensei!” 

“Good, that’s why I had you wear your white belts, we’re starting over,” he stood in the middle of class. “Hawk, Diaz, fifty push-ups on your knuckles. Miss Robinson, Miss L/N, warm them up,” he pointed at the two boys before directing them towards you two.

You let out a breath before you followed Aisha to the front of the class. You nodded before you spoke. “Fighting position. Jab punch. Ready? Hiya!” You shouted, following through with the movement.

Adrenaline coursed through you as you directed the class alongside Aisha. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Eli and Miguel do push-ups. You couldn’t say you felt bad, part of you felt better knowing your Sensei didn’t agree with what went down either.

Only, you knew your boyfriend would feel differently, it was only a matter of time until you saw you were right.

~

After class, you were sent off with a homework assignment—watch Over the Top. That’s how you ended up in Eli’s basement with the rest of the dojo, the movie playing on the TV. 

You were curled into Eli’s side, feet tucked under you as you both shared a bowl of popcorn. The movie was definitely unlike anyone you saw, but it was a good movie you guessed.

“Use a coaster, dipshit” Eli flicked a kernel at one of your friends.

You snickered, Eli smiled down at you before he settled.

The movie ended and Miguel was the last to leave. 

Once the basement was cleaned up, you were about to leave but Eli had another idea.

“Come on, stay,” he stopped you from texting your dad to pick you up, a smile on his face. “We could watch a movie or something.”

Your eyes widened. “Mean Girls,” you stated.

He chuckled before grabbing the remote to put it on.

A few minutes later, the movie was playing but you were not watching. Somehow, Eli had managed to turn your attention to him and since then, his lips never left yours. 

His hand was on the small of your back while you curled your hand around his neck, your other hand resting on his chest. 

Since the weekend, all you and Eli have been doing was kissing. While you enjoyed it, you missed the moments where you kept each other company or even talked. That’s why you pulled away. 

He chased after your lips but you stopped him.

“How about we watch the movie?” You asked, chewing on your lip. “We’ve been kissing non-stop and my lips need a break,” you chuckled. 

He inhaled before passing you a smile. “Sure.” 

You paid attention this time, watching as Cady met the Plastics. The movie went on, your arm thrown across Eli’s abdomen while your cheek rested in the crook of his shoulder. You glanced up at him momentarily to see if he was watching.

“Do you like this movie?” You asked.

“It’s interesting,” he shrugged. “The blonde chick’s pretty badass for the shit she does,” he answered. “But tell me how realistic it is,” he glanced down at you, an amused look plastered on his face.

“Wish I could tell you, but instead of playing Barbies with other girls I was stuck watching you and Demitri trade Pokémon cards,” you joked. 

“Don’t remind me,” he sighed.

You furrowed your brows up at him. “Hey, seeing you get excited over getting Charizard for the first time was the moment I realized I liked you,” you stated, voice lightening at the memory.

He blinked at the realization. “You’ve liked me since then?” He looked at you.

You were left mouth agape. “I-uh,” you gulped. “Yeah, since then,” you smiled. “The nerdiness was cute,” you added. 

Something flashed over him as his gaze dropped. “And now?” 

“Your confidence,” you shrugged. “Your strength. I feel safe when I’m around you,” you said truthfully.

He smirked, reaching down to cup your jaw. 

“I like you though, Eli, all of you. And you don’t have to be a certain way around me,” you stated, sitting up. “I love you,” you confessed.

His eyes lit up. “I love you too,” he said with conviction. 

You beamed, reaching down to kiss him. You couldn’t believe you said it. But you were glad you did.

[gravedice]

I don't post to reddit very often, but I do tend to browse it. The amount of indie games that use AI assets that get posted there keeps going up, and they always get rightfully flayed in the comments for it.

First of all, I don't understand why these subreddits don't disallow AI generated content to begin with.

But more importantly (I went on a rant about this recently on stream) a lot of these game devs will say they're just using AI generated assets as a placeholder until they can hire an artist. But they don't realize how badly they've shot themselves in the foot. By publicly using AI generated art, their community is already not spending money on their game, and they've created a heap of distrust in them and their product. No one wants to work for someone that made money off of 300 ai generated assets, and no one wants to trust a developer that's gonna cut those corners. (Obviously I'm generalizing, but most people would not)

Artists make asset packs for a reason. You can buy all the assets you need for 1/50th the cost of paying an artist to make all your assets custom, then make your money off your game, and THEN look into an artist afterwards if they're just placeholders.

These AI generated game devs will always use a lack of funds as a crutch.

I was not a visual artist when I started coding, but I slowly taught myself to make pixel art, and in the beginning it was ROUGH. Like, cried cuz nothing looked how it did in my head rough. But I pushed through it, and I'm happy with my skills and they keep growing. I became an artist because I wanted things to look a certain way, and didn't have the funds to work with another artist. And now I do art streams.

Clearly, that's not for everyone. But there's all these wonderful premade assets out there, and you can stimulate the indie game economy, and get plenty of assets for a small game, all for the price of a cheeseburger.

I am just begging indie devs to stop cutting corners with AI art, it's so detrimental to you, your work, and the community.

[connoisseursdecomfort]

Spies, Lies and Deceptions - Questions

and related theories about Twilight

I went to a special exhibition about spies in the Imperial War Museum in London yesterday. And yes it did make me think about Twilight. So I'm going to make a post about several questions that have always been asked about Twilight.

Why do the agents have to wear WISE pins or earrings or some sort of accessories?

I am opening with the funniest discovery I've made during this visit. BRIXMIS (British spies operating in East Germany) and SOXMIS (Soviet Military Mission. Operating in West Germany) both "were required to drive clearly marked vehicles" and "had to wear uniform on tours". Well...

Regarding Twilight's disguises, why can't he put on more disguises as Loid Forger?

There are indeed examples of how makeups can be done, and how different makes-ups are classified as (i.e. temporary, semi-permanent, permanent). There is this one person tho who didn't use disguises:

Ben Cowburn, who had completed four highly dangerous missions to occupied France, explained in his memoirs that he "wore no disguise in France... an undisguised [spy] could look the same and be different."

Why does his aliases always start with R/L? Why did Nightfall made their aliases so close to their code names?

This could explain why Twilight's aliases always begin with the letters R and L. It could also explain why Fiona had to make their aliases very close to their codenames. It's most possibly how they refer to each other professionally.

Last but not least, there is this one part of the exhibition which would give us a glimpse of what Twilight would ultimately face. The letters between Klaus Fuchs, the "atomic spy", and one of his close friends, Genia Peierls.

Fuchs and the Peierls are close friends. He would even babysit their children. After his arrest, Genia wrote to Fuchs:

For your "cause" you did not have to be on such warm personal relations with them, to play with their children, and dance and drink and talk. You are such a quiet man that you could have kept yourself much more aloof. You were enjoying the best of the world you were trying to destroy. It is not honest. In a way I am glad that you failed to this, because these people taught you the value of humanity, of warmth, of freedom. What did you do to them, Klaus? Not only that their faith in decency and humanity is shaken, but for years to come, they will be suspected of being involved in this with you. Perhaps you did not think about it at the time, bt you must think now. ... Oh, Klaus, my tears are washing away the ink. I was so very fond of you, and I so much wanted you to be happy, and now you never will be. ... You are now going through the hardest time a man can go through, you have burned your god.

And Fuch's reply:

I didn't [think], and that is the greatest horror I had to face when I looked at myself. ... Sorry, I haven't got anybody to type this for me. I hope you can read it. And don't worry, if you don't see the tears. I have learned to cry again. And to love again.