#Talking about how she was revived without any effort on the part of the heroes or cleverness from the writers

[stormears]

Xion is the deadest bitch who ever died

[killmebythebeach]

A bunch of head cannons (Maybe too much). Also in talking about the characters.

I think Dream is that one design where his skin is just the static tv screen. He just constantly emits that fuzzy noise, Sam crafted him the smile mask that he can see through so he doesn't scare people.

George is just kind of the server itself. He's the same species as Hannah, but a mushroom and more powerful. If he stays awake too long, the server just kind of freezes. This is also a reason XD keeps him sleeping, it's his way of talking to George and he thinks the server is like his soap opera of mortals.

Callahan is sort of like the person who makes sure George doesn't get killed or dies while asleep, making sure he's surrounded by mushrooms and such. Deer hybrid <3

Alyssa joined the server because she knew all her friends were idiots and didn't want them to die immediately. But once the elections rolled around, she felt the pressure of choosing sides and ran away to the desert, only keeping contact with Ponk. She actually lives just a couple miles from Foolish's summer home. Her communicator actually died after a couple months and she had no way of charging it, so she lost contact with everyone.

Sapnap is a magma cube hybrid and can jump higher than most, his natural temperature runs hotter, and is fire proof. Bad found him in the nether when he was maybe 10-15 years old.

Sam was actually a normal creeper, but gained player like sentience from being struck by lightning. Instead of becoming charged, he gained intelligence and met the others on the server. Callahan taught him some Redstone, but from there he figured out a lot on his own. He's also a creeper centaur.

Ponk is actually a descendant of a fairy, a lemon tree. Their mask was also a gift from Sam because after the second or third time their tree was burnt, their immune system was weakened a considerable amount. Alyssa also wore her mask for them.

Bad is a size shifting demon from the nether, more specifically soul sand desert. He uses soul fire to gain strength, so because the egg died when near it, he was just a little weaker than normal. Because he's a demon he needs a tie to the overworld to stay there, he tied his soul and lives to Skeppy.

Tommy was grown in a lab to be a hero, project: THESEUS. The lab gave him small enhancements, like slightly stronger and just a bit more resilient, to make the Above Average Boy (TM). He then ran away to meet Wilbur. When Dream asked Wilbur if he wanted to come to the server, he asked if Tommy could go first to see what it was like. He also actually really likes gardening and making up funny songs to Wilbur playing guitar. He also made funny lyrics for his discs, but he's still a bit scared to take them out of his ender chest. Other than bringing attachment, Dream also exiled Tommy to see what his lab enhancements could do.

Tubbo is an adaptive hybrid! His hair was blond, shifting to brown when Wilbur found him, getting blue eyes from Tommy, growing small horns under Schlatt, parts of his skin being static when Dream was "helping" him with his presidency, and parts of his scars tinging black and green from Ranboo and Micheal. Tubbo also helped Wilbur write part of the anthem. He likes living in the snow because the Manberg flag had magma blocks on it, casting a heatwave over the country, and after L'Manburg blew up it got really hot from the exposed stone in direct sun.

Fundy can actually hold his breath for a very long time and swim very well because of Sally teaching him and his salmon genes. The yellow things on his hat are actually shells, and the stripes on his jacket are trans colors. Also with his dreams, he saw Eret was going to betray them but didn't think it was real, or didn't want to. He also saw Wilbur blow up L'Manburg but chose not to believe it, thinking his father could still be saved. He actually saw pretty much everything, but didn't quite understand what they were until after doomsday.

The necklace Punz wears is one of those picture lockets, but he lost the picture and can't remember what it was. The first time Dream paid him was when Dream asked for help and Punz made an off hand joke about getting money, and then Dream thought he was being serious. Him, Dream, and Sapnap were like brothers, and Punz got sadder every time he saw Dream pushing people away and diving deeper into darkness.

Purpled is an aliensent to see if the planet was colonizable, but then crashed and was stranded, all his communications down and his ship barely able to hover fifty feet off the ground. When Quackity blew it up, he essentially got rid of his chance of ever going home. Purpled's species can shapeshift, so he turned himself into the first person he saw, Punz. Eventually before trying to communicate with the native life forms, he edited his form a little so they weren't identical, keeping purple eyes and antennae, changing the colors slightly, and changing the voice up. When he moves away from the main SMP, Ponk makes sure to check up on him and that he has a way to check his communicator.

Wilbur came a month after sending Tommy. His father being a patron of life and his mother the goddess of death, he met in the middle being born as a human. The only reason Ghostbur was as active and present as he was was because he was so connected to both life and death. Since his corpse was decaying for as long as it was, Wilbur is now super weak, his flesh is thin and his eyes are rotted and gone. Much like Ghostbur, Wilbur in limbo saw what people said about him, and Ghostbur could hear that from the back of his head. Now Wilbur can hear what people say about Ghostbur and he hates it, not wanting to be connected to what he thinks like a shell of himself.

Schlatt is a ram (duh) and actually does the fainting goat thing. So when he died of a heart attack, no one knew at first if he was actually dead or not. His alcoholism stems from the revive book, as the possibility of tampering with death made him existential and scared, so to cope he drank. There are also a ton of other stuff other than revival in the book, but it's in galactic.

Skeppy was just a normal human, but after making the pact with Bad, Bad put a spell on him. Parts of him turned into diamond, protecting both his and Bad's lives. He however, is unaware of this. With the egg, he would just sit on it, the diamonds chipping away to make room for the vines.

Eret was cursed by the Wither Cult, giving them white eyes and a slowly deteriorating memory. Not sure what to do, Foolish dropped them off at the SMP. Sometimes they would dream about old memories from before the curse, but it was just glimpses so he could never tell what they meant. Once they were king, they made the Herobrine shrine subconsciously, not really sure what it was after. They also had a strange affinity of beacons and resurrection, some of their memories resurfacing when they tried to help Phil and Ghostbur revive Wilbur after doomsday. The reason people are more scared of their eyes than any other wierd eyes was because he generally looks like a normal human, but the wither along with their Herobrine origins creates an uncanny valley that people are shocked by.

Jack had red and blue irises before crawling out of hell, but after coming back the whites of his eyes also turned red and blue. He always wears 3d glasses so no one noticed, but he just thought no one cared enough to mention it. He also has a bunch of scars and burn marks that no one but him can see, therefore no one asks about them or thinks something is wrong, cementing the idea that no one cares about him.

Niki is a blaze hybrid (stole this from @/420technoblazeit) whose fire hair color changes based on strong emotion, something she bond with Tubbo for as a fellow shifter. A soft yellow in L'Manburg, brighter orange in Manburg, hot pink on Doomsday, a soul fire blue with the syndicate (which Techno hates), and a dead grey when she found out Wilbur was alive. She was also old child hood friends with Ranboo and Eret, leaving Ranboo for the SMP. Ranboo, unfortunatly, doesn't remember much more than her name. She also knows galactic from Ranboo, so she talks about her troubles to Shy the Enderman. She doesn't really know how to talk to Puffy anymore after Doomsday or finding out how she wants to protect Tommy.

Quackity can perfectly replicate someone's voice and, with a lot of effort, can completely change his form to another player. He also has very small yellow wings, too small to fly, so he almost always hides them. He used to constantly change his voice for jokes with Karl, Sapnap, and George, but he doesn't like doing it now in Las Nevadas, as he sees it as unprofessional. However, sometimes he uses when he visits Dream, changing his voice to people like George and Sapnap to make torture more effective.

In the In Between and Other Side, Karl actually looks like his old skin, or his natural state (the big purple one that inspired his sweater). But most of the time in the normal world, he looks human. With effort he can bring out the interdemential being thing, something only Quackity and Sapnap know about. The more he time travels, the easier it becomes to change, and he's even started defaulting to the other form.

HBomb is actually just a normal news reporter, sent to interview and record what's going on in the server, his first big story being the election. Upon Doomsday, the stress of seeing everyone alone, fighting, and disconnected, he ran away from the world, essentially becoming a cat lady. His undercover reporter persona is actually the cat maid. He eventually came back to the server to see how he could help after Doomsday, befriending Niki again and living with her in the underground city.

Techno is a piglin, so he's scared of soul fire. He forgot to tell Phil before he decorated the syndicate room, so he just suffers in silence. He also does better when around a lot of gold, like in the nether, and he feels drained and slightly weaker without it. Instead of just putting gold around the area (it would ruin his property value), he just hibernates. He has an emerald earing, like all of the syndicate, but his is a locket that unfolds into pictures of the syndicate.

Ant always wears a red hoodie, now ruined by the egg, that used to be Red's. On Red's death anniversary, him, Bad, Skeppy, and Sam would make cake and put flowers on his grave. He missed the last one because it was during the egg, but for a brief moment after Puffy killed him he saw Red. Red then promptly and bluntly told him to stop being a pussy (haha, cat) and that he shouldn't do all this just to get him back, one of Ant's motivators to make amends with the people he hurt while with the egg. Ant is also a shapeshifter, but can only turn into a cat.

Phil actually used to work under Foolish as a patron of life but then he had a son with the goddess of death, so his title was removed so he could be with her and he became an Angel of Death. Kristin noticed how sad he was after being released, so she gifted him wings. They were however, destroyed on November 16th. His chat also serves as messenger pigeons, which were used to send letters to Wilbur.

Connor is actually just a hedgehog who somehow befriended Schlatt. Even before the haunted mansion, Karl vented to him about his time travel troubles, not knowing he was a sentient player. As a hedgehog, no one really cares where he goes, so he goes outside the server limits to meet his friends from the haunted mansion.

Puffy is a distant relative of Schlatt, but instead of politics she went into piracy. With her mom, she went travelling the seas. One say, a storm came and wiped out her ship, her crew, her mom, everything but her. The reason she survived was because Foolish saw her and saved her. Unfortunately, Puffy hit hee head in the crash and doesn't remember anything.

Vikkstar is the equivalent of a big time celebrity, so of course his endorsement of POG2020 was a big deal.

Lazarbeam is literally just a ginger bread cookie.

Ranboo has actually met a lot of the smp before actually joining. He's met Niki, Fundy, Eret, Punz, and Dream at least. He also sees the inverted colors Enderman see. His suit was actually a gift from Eret before they forgot how to tailor. He got the crown from Techno after joining the syndicate, claiming he didn't want any syndicate members to look like trash.

Foolish came to the server most recently to check up on Eret, but he couldn't bring himself to leave again. When Puffy adopts him, he can't say no because he remembers saving her. His initial goal was to kill an ender dragon to claim the XD title and become a full god like DreamXD, but after realising someone already killed it he went into his totem if death phase. Upon meeting Eret, he got over it and they went on some silly adventures, Foolish now taking a more peaceful route.

Hannah is essentially a weaker George, as her power is tied to the plants themselves and not the entire server. She however has a lot more physical power because rose dryads like to fight because they have thorns. Since roses can be taken out a lot easier, she is essentially a glass canon. Also when around any plant, she can make it grow faster than normal.

Any guest on the server? Corpse, Pokimane, Lil Nas? They were all Slimecicle. That's how he knows where everyone is from, even outside of Las Nevadas. No one else knows this. He's also ancient, if he met Phil they would probably recognise eachother. There was an actual Charlie Slimecicle who was not a slime, but after being launched into orbit this Slimecicle decided to impersonate him.

Michael Mcchill is a sort of bounty hunter. He came to the server after hearing of all the crime, assuming there'd be a lot of bounties to collect. However, he soon learned that no one really cares if you commit a crime. He then took to reading news articles made by HBomb to see if there were any past open bounties. But after reading for a while about the server's wronguns, mostly Dream, he began to sympathise with them. And he's also a speedrunner, so maybe he could help with some bounties across other servers!

This was a very long post and i apologize, but it was so fun to finally write all these thoughts down! I hope you liked them! I can't even fit all the tags I want.

[animebookworm16]

Who Are You? - Angst

For @j3ssisam3ss

This is my angst piece for @maribat-angst-fluff-april, prompt 25 Childhood Friends

It was the middle of winter in Gotham when she showed up. A tiny girl everyone guessed to be about three. She never spoke or made a sound, but she often smiled, even on the coldest nights. The little girl would just curl up to whoever had taken her that day and smile. At first the other homeless believed she'd never make it to spring. But the little girl was full of surprises. Not only did she survive the worst of the winter, she thrived once spring arrived.

Everyone knew she had a name, no one knew what it was, but they knew she had one. They also knew she was old enough to know it. Surprisingly, no one ever tried to give her a new name. Sure she got nicknames. More nicknames than a toddler could ever hope to keep track of, but somehow she did.

The little girl grew. As all children must. And the older children and adults always made sure to enunciate whenever she was in the area, hoping to teach her how to speak. They all banded together, like they always do for the especially young kids, and kept her away from the worst of the drugs, gangs, rogues, and the overall darkest parts of Gotham.  She grew, and most people started calling her Pixie. Their little fairy caused laughter and mischief wherever she went. Even still she rarely spoke, her words as few and far between as they were, were always impactful to whoever she spoke to.

When Jason Todd started living on the street, everything changed. Pixie stuck to his side like glue. She laughed, she started talking, Pixie acted like the entire five years she had been living around Gotham she had been solely waiting for Jason to show up. The ones who raised her would have felt jilted if it hadn't been for how happy the little girl looked. Two years passed and the two ten-year-olds rarely left each other's sides.

Then Jason stole the hubcaps off the Batmobile and Pixie was finally picked up by CPS.

Pixie had to be strapped down by CPS so that she wouldn't hurt anyone. Luckily for her, a young French couple had been passing by when they saw what they were doing, and demanded to adopt the young girl. CPS didn't want to deal with the girl for much longer and agreed. When Tom and Sabine found out she didn't have a name, they quickly named her Marinette Dupain-Cheng and decided her birthday would be the same day they adopted her. 

The newly named Marinette was quickly taken out of Gotham and out of the country as the couple returned to Paris.

She never knew that Jason had been adopted by Bruce Wayne.

Jason was picked up by Batman and quickly adopted by Bruce Wayne. Before long he had taken up the mantle of Robin and was fighting crime.  He looked everywhere for his friend but no matter who or where he asked, no one had any idea. As the months passed, Jason lost hope for ever finding Pixie again.

He would never know that she had been picked up by CPS and adopted by a Parisian couple and taken back to Paris.

In Paris, Marinette always appeared happy, and her new parents were always busy but tried to make time for her. Marinette had taken to wandering Paris. She wanted to be familiar with her new city, even if Tom and Sabine didn't always agree with her new habit.

When she started school, Marinette stayed quiet. Friendly, but quiet. This made her a prime target for the mayor's spoiled daughter Chloe. Marinette allowed it to happen and did nothing to change the status quo. three years passed in this way until suddenly Marinette was seated next to an extremely outspoken girl named Alya, who would absolutely not stand for the status quo, so Marinette filled that space, doing what she'd always done since she'd come to Paris molded herself into what everyone around her wanted. The same day she met her new deskmate, and self-proclaimed bestie, Marinette also became one of the two heroes of Paris, fighting an emotional terrorist who thrived on negative emotions (and just being from Gotham made her a prime target). Marinette became Dame Nuit, with her partner Mister Bug.

She listened to everything Plagg told her, especially the warnings and consequences of using the Black Cat Miraculous.

For the next four years, Marinette would fill every mold she was placed in. The hero, the Guardian, the class president, the perfect baker's daughter, everything. 

Then the consequences started showing up. Marinette knew she had to wrap up Hawk Moth and Mayura quickly. She started pushing it so much that Mister Bug called her out one night and in a single moment of weakness she told him what was happening. What her Miraculous was doing to her.

Mister Bug immediately wanted her to stop and let him give the Miraculous to someone else, but Dame Nuit shut it down saying that even if she stopped now, the damage was done and nothing would change that. In fact, using the Miraculous, while it had started the process, was actually slowing it down. Mister Bug cried when she told him that.

Together they redoubled their efforts to bring Hawk Moth and Mayura down. Of course, Mister Bug insisted on bringing in more permanent heroes, under the guise of keeping one of the two things Hawk Moth was after out of the fight. Dame Nuit then argued that it should be the Ladybug because it's the one that can fix everything which just left them going in circles. But even still she conceded to his request for more backup.

Within six months, Gabriel Agreste and Nathalie Sancoeur had been stripped of their Miraculous and Paris was free to feel their emotions once more. All the Miraculous were returned and Marinette and Adrien revealed their identities to each other.

Adrien stuck to Marinette's side and became an unofficial brother. He helped her as the build-up of chaos in her soul took a physical manifestation, and began to destroy her 

A year after Hawk Moth's defeat Marinette's entire class was granted a trip to Gotham City.

Marinette would have laughed at the irony if she didn't know it would probably be the last place she saw. It was strangely comforting to know that the city that held her most precious memories would also be the place that would hold her last.

In Gotham, Jason grew into a young man. He discovered the woman he thought was his mother wasn't. He tracked down his real mother, then got beaten half to death by the Joker only to be blown up by one of Joker's bombs.

Jason died.

Then Jason was revived by the Lazarus Pits and trained by the League of Shadows. He grew to hate Batman and wanted nothing more than to see the end of the Joker. 

Years later, Jason would return to Gotham only to find he had been replaced and that the Joker was still running free, and alive. Jason tried to kill the new Robin, a kid named Tim Drake, Batman, and the Joker. He managed to end none of them.

Bruce convinced Jason to stick around and one thing led to another and Redhood became part of the Batfamily patrol rotation. He doesn't stay in the manor but he does drop in at least once a month for family dinners at Alfred's request. On the weekends, Jason would take Tim out and teach him how to spot a sniper, an assassin, what different guns look like when someone is trying to hide them, and most importantly, how to defuse a bomb. It becomes a bonding time for the two, but Jason still calls Tim 'Replacement' but now as a term of endearment.

He never forgets Pixie and she is one of the few things that kept him sane during the worst of the Pit Madness.

Then Damian shows up and Jason has no idea how to deal with the tiny Demon Spawn. It's rough going for a while but they all found their ways of bonding and before long they are one large dysfunctional family. 

When Jason turned eighteen, he, Dick, Tim, and Damian welcomed a French class to Wayne Industries for a week-long tour. And that is where he thought he saw someone he would never see again.

Without his permission, Jason called out to her, "Pixie?" It was barely a whisper, but she heard it.

Her head whipped around and she stared at him, "Jason?"

He wanted to say it was a happy reunion. And it kind of was. They hugged. Her class and his brothers stared. Then the tears started. Pixie was smiling but tears were streaming down her face.

One of the other students came over and asked her in French if she was okay. Pixie shook her head and the blond boy asked if there was somewhere she could rest. Jason offered to show them a room. The three of them sat in a quiet room as Pixie cried. She kept leaning into Jason and he wasn't about to stop her. After who knows how long, Pixie dried her eyes and haltingly told Jason what was going on. She told him, how she'd been adopted and went by Marinette now. How she was dying and no one besides Adrien, the blond, knew. How she probably wouldn't make it out of Gotham.

Jason's first reaction was to want to hurt something. His second was to hold Pixie as close as he could and never let her go. Jason cried. 

For the rest of the week everywhere that Pixie went, Jason was close behind. The other Waynes noticed and on the fourth day of their stay, invited Pixie and Adrien to join them for dinner.

There, a not-so-subtle interrogation went down, asking Pixie how she knew Jason. At which point, even Pixie's failing health allowed her to spill so many childhood stories about Jason that even they couldn't resist her knowledge. In return, Jason told Adrien stories he had collected about her as a toddler and little kid. It was the brightest smile Adrien had ever seen on Marinette, and the first real smile Pixie had given Jason all week. He could almost pretend that she wasn't dying.

After dinner Pixie said, "Jason, did I ever tell you about the dream I've had ever since I was a little girl?"

"What dream Pix?"

"I've always wanted to stand at the very top of the Wayne Industries building at dawn, and feel the wind at the top of the world."

"Really?"

Pixie smiled a soft sad smile, "Yeah. Do you think we could do that tomorrow?"

Jason suddenly realized what Pixie was talking about, and had to fight a lump in his throat to answer, "Yeah. Pix. Yeah, we can do that."

Adrien and Pixie stayed the night that night. That morning at about three, Jason woke them up and took them to the top of Wayne Industries. Pixie stood as high up as she possibly could. Adrien and Jason watched her with tears in their eyes. Before long, they were joined by Batman, Nightwing, Red Robin, and Robin, who all wanted to make sure she wouldn't fall. Jason didn't have the heart to tell them they couldn't stop what was about to happen.

As dawn started to creep up on them, Adrien broke down sobbing, begging Marinette to fight a little longer. When the light hit her head, Marinette closed her eyes and smiled. They all saw her start to fade.

Her hands went first. Like dust. As the light increased so did her fading. Before she faded completely, Pixie walked towards them a peaceful smile on her face. Jason was crying now too. His Pixie looked like a ghost.

And as she faded completely, everyone on that roof heard her say, "My name is Jeanette. It's so nice to meet you!"

[shoezuki]

Tommy's prison/revival arc isnt well written actually

Anyways ive been wanting to talk on it a while for a bit here but havent had the Time or like. The thought to. But im gonna go off now.

First off im gonna say im ASSUMING this stream and plot of tommy being in the prison with dream is written entirely by tommy and dream. Wilbur May be involved in the latest stream but im not sure.

Bringing tommy back to life after only three days of him being dead did practically nothing to progress plot, the characters, or audience's understanding. In fact i feel that it damaged Other characters' potential and plot and already established plotlines.

The 'development' aspect

A really, really easy way to see if anything has changed or developed through an arc or plotline is to straightup just compare the 'beginning' to the 'end' in terms of the barebones situation. So;

Beginning: tommy is trapped in an isolated prison cell with dream, his own abuser who has hurt him in the past, for an unknown amount of time. He's terrified of dream and being stuck there with him.

End: tommy is trapped in an isolated prison cell with dream after being killed then revived by him, his own abuser whos hurt him in the past, for an unknown amount of time. Hes terrified of dream and being stuck there with him.

Okay. This is simplified obvious. But the point stands. ALTHOUGH the troupe of 'going back to the beginning' is common in the heroes journey its. It doesnt work here. Has tommy learned anything? Has he changed as a character? Is the severity of their situation any different? Have we, as the audience, learned anything new?

Im going to expand on that last point because i think it has the strongest potential argument. Technically for progression in literature and development of plot/characters, things can Change without them being Aware as characters. It can change just by the audience's perception changing or being challenge.

Slight example: i've been reading a webcomic called Your Throne. Its a fantasy/political drama about a noble lady who entered a competition with another noble lady to become the empress. The main lady lost despite her being a better fit, and the comic starts with the main lady trying to assassinate the empress. Its assumed and stated by the main lady that she 'ruined her life' and so thats all the readers know. However, later in the novel we see flashbacks to the competition itself and find that the two ladies were extremely close friends, neither wanting anything bad for the other, but it was the emperor himself who manipulated both of them for his own agenda. Those flashbacks gave us an entirely different idea of who the real antagonist is and completely changed the two main ladies' relationship. THAT is how the audience's understanding of the plot and novel can be used to change the entire story. We dont get such here though

Some things that were brought to light during tommy being dead/revived:

Dream is capable of reviving people infinitely

This was already implicated and assumed. The book dream has being a means of reviving people has been around Technically since schlatt's death. This just 'confirmed' what was known

Time works differently/feels longer in the afterlife

This doesnt really impact much beyond emotions and implications. If we had more insight into what the 'afterlife' is like beyond nothingness perhaps so. But really it just makes it so wilbur being dead for what feels like 9 years and tommy having been dead for 2 months appeal to emotions.

Wilbur is evil

This one fuckin sucks i cant lie HSKSHSISSGEGDV. Like i was gon go on bout it and i will but it jus sucks. We have nothing to go on besides tommy's word, no examlles of what Horrible things wilbur said could make tommy assume this, etcetc. Ill most likely make a seperate post on how this feels like we're just going to get 'wilbur is a horrible villain' type with him. But still. I feel wilbur Not Being Good isnt a new development.

Dream is going to revive wilbur

This doesnt feel new either, part because phil had wanted to revive wilbur before (ill get to that more later) and that tommy had kept dream alive/initially imprisoned him with the idea of him reviving wilbur.

Dream believes wilbur will break him out of prison

Okau this makes no sense to me actually. I cwnt understand How exactly wilbur would be able to do this? Or why dream believes he even Could? Mans been dead for like 9 years and all we Know of the afterlife is that its black... nothingness. How would 9 years of that make wilbur capable of busting the prison open?

So. Yeah. All in all this plotline hasnt done anything new, developed things, or altered people's perceptions. We just ended up back at square one. Back to tommy being traumatized, dream being 'evil' and horrible and doing villain monologues, and them being stuck together.

Other characters and plotlines

Im pretty damn sure tommy's revival fucked up a LOT of other characters' plotlines and potential development. Honestly i feel this has a lot to do with the writers not communicating with other ccs well enough. But Ill talk about specific characters from least to most fucked over in my opinion:

Sam

He's the best off. He hqd been there during tommy's death, had been close to tommy, had majorly blamed himself and his own mistakes for tommy's death. His grief and self hatred was actually really heartbreaking and well done. The attached character of Sam Nook being unaware of tommy's death and simply waiting for tommy to return was a really good parallel to sam's own grief and anger. like it really snapped sam the guy who cares for tommy and wants to do Right by him back together with him as the Warden of the prison. Mixed personal life with 'just business'.

I feel it wouldve been nice to have him like. Have more time to grieve properly and come to terms eith tommy's death and his own involvement/influence over the events. Him finding tommy alive again Could be a means of him like. Facing his own grief head on if done well.

Ranboo

Mostly in the context of him and sam's argument do i feel it got screwed over. The weight of them yelling at each other and trying to find who to blame and the implications that Maybe ranboo was the one who caused the security breach that closed down the prison on tommy just.... doesnt hit so hard anymore. Because how can there be blame and arguments and a 'who done it' mystery when tommy popped up all fine again?

Puffy

I dony know much of her involvement or how she found out tommy died (besides metagaming shhhhh) but i saw her monologuing of how they 'failed' tommy and like. Her whole 'he was so young we the Adults failed him' spiel is like........... inconsequential? Now??? Like no dont worry he died but hes alright now.

Philza

BET YOU DIDNY EXPECT TO SEE THIS FUCKER!!!!!! But actually though i want to talk bout how this ties into phil. A LOT. for Zalbr ❤. But also because i see ppl tying phil to tommy's death n like nah shutup u doin it wrong. Ill go off more in a Wilbur Post. But essentially: i dont like that dream is now going to revive wilbur. I feel they arent going to tie philza into this Despite phil having originally been trying to revive his son and studying on it and Attempting and Failing. But now suddenly dream can just. Say some magic words and Poof wilbur lives? So we're just going to Kill philza's revival attempts plotline and leave that hanging? This made his efforts seem pointless and Wack like oh why didnt you just Say The Magic Words phil????

Niki

I feel really bad for niki. She hasnt been able to do a lore stream during tommy's 'death' (she tweeted she wanted to but her computer wasnt working) and considering her entire character.... that shit is important. We seen it with Jack Manifold how tommy's death impacted Him considering he literally wanted tommy dead. And since niki is in a similar boat to jack of trying to kill tommy and it being her Only goal...... thats extremely important.

BUT. i feel there wasnt any communication. Did she or anyone even know tommy would be revived? Did no one consider they could At Least let her do a single stream on it? Like jack manifold????

We couldve gotten a Really good niki lore stream. I genuinely was so excited for it and i dont regularly watch her. But we seen it with jack manifold which is why i dont feel he got screwed because mans genuinely did So Good he could pop off with anything n i think it works in His favour. But now........ for niki. Canonically she never even knew tommy was Dead. So its like nothing even happened for her. Is she just supposed to continue on trying to kill tommy with no progression?

What i think would work

This is more me being like 'hey @ the dsmp writers let me in' type speculation sbosegussgs. But i was thinkin on a Really easy way to 'fix' this without rewriting lore and the streams.

Dream should kill tommy again now that he's been revived and Leave Him Dead.

More development for the characters who are affected by his death Especially niki. More time for grief and self reflection and development

A chance for the audience to figure out what the 'afterlife' really is.

Dream is supposed to be smart and a master manipulator or something right? Why doesnt he use being able to revive tommy as a bargaining chip with sam for his own freedom?

The audience would now Know dream's intentions with tommy better, that this death isnt 'final', but we could still see other characters' grief and reactions and coping without it feeling cheap. Ive seen some 'but people dont know tommy is alive so hes still dead in their mind' but that sucks imo.

We'd know more on dream's ability to revive people and that he can just Do It on a whim (which i think sucks but hey im trying) but no one else would know this canonically

Okay. Im done. If you read this. Thankyou. I love you. Hmu.

[roselen-mylady]

In Another Life

Bucky Barnes x reader °part fourteen°

Summary: Waiting 88 years to find your soulmate? It was cruel. But it was a cruel fate Bucky would have to face whether he accepted it or not. Bucky was a tortured man all his life and he wasn't even granted the solace of having his soulmate at his side. All he had was the promise of one in another life. They were separated by two different times.

But the pain in their lives were connected.

Y/n had been alone ever since she could remember. All she could depend on was the soulmate that was destined to be at her side. Yet when the snap occured she lost him.

And Bucky never got to meet her.

"It's called Recover and Enable with Stark Technologies: Opportunity, Revival and Excellence. Or uh, RESTORE for short." Tony explained, the hologram capturing what they all knew to be one of his last days. "Damn, now that I say it aloud, it's a bit pretentious but we'll get used to it." He chuckled, still a little proud of his abbreviation.

"It's a resources company really. Offers financial help to families affected by the snap along with structure and aid to businesses, cooperations, hell even the government. They've always had their heads up their asses though." Y/n listened carefully, her heart stinging a bit more than usual. Maybe it was from watching yet another message from her idol and lost friend.

"It comes along with therapy and counseling. Really it's supposed to help piece the world back together. You should feel right at home. It was that aspect that told me you'd be perfect for the job. I'm sure I can help you with the other parts of the job. Or uh, Pepper will. I was never any good at running a business that was always her thing." Tony smiled fondly, the hologram's eyes seeming to stare straight into Pepper's.

Y/n could tell Pepper was fighting tears. It only made her own guilt grow.

Why did Tony have to die? It wasn't a fair question. Not to her. She should've done more, should've given her life to let him live the rest of his. To see his daughter grow up. To let Pepper finally have peace.

But what if she had? Would Bucky had even known she was his soulmate? Would he have found her body in the rumble, her shattered arm and scarred skin barely visible from the damage of the stones she should've been destroyed by. Would he have had to find out his soulmate had lost the war from her stopped countdown? Would he have had to piece together how close they were to meeting? Would he recover from that?

"We need to start soon," Pepper spoke suddenly, hastily wiping her face as she stood. Y/n watched wide eyed and silent as Pepper paced over to a man she'd learned to be Happy, quietly requesting he watch Morgan. Y/n stood, quickly moving to follow the woman.

She understood what Pepper was doing. She was avoiding the pain, putting all her effort and focus into anything but the death of her husband. Hundreds of people did it after the first snap and she couldn't say she blamed them. But it was different this time. There was no way she could've prevented the first snap, no way she could've saved all of those lives that were now returned.

But the last snap was within arms reach of her. She was capable of stopping it, sparing the last victim of the snap. But she failed.

Maybe Pepper had the right idea. This guilt was overwhelming.

"Tony set up some meetings with other corporations for Monday. I'd like you to be there with me." Pepper told her, her heels rhythmically clicking down the steps as Y/n followed carefully.

"Monday? Doesn't this seem a little rushed? I mean, I don't even know what I'm doing. Shouldn't I have some kind of lessons?" Y/n objected, her brow creasing warily.

"You'll learn through experience." Pepper replied. It was too much, too overwhelming. Y/n had just lost two friends, another left her and she'd met her soulmate. Now they wanted her to run a company that the world would eventually depend on?

How would she even begin?

In an effort to take a breath, she looked away from Pepper, her eyes trailing to the lake. It was peaceful, much more peaceful than Y/n had felt in days-years if she was being honest.

She hoped that after everything that had happened, she could just go back to being normal or as normal as someone like her could be. She didn't care about the hero's life and she didn't want to be Iron Star for any longer than she had to. But as she looked around at the others, she realized that was becoming less and less of a possibility. They looked at her as if she were next.

They seemed to know she was going to be one of them just by looking at her. But why? Because Tony took a chance on her? Because they were so similar? Or was it something else, something she hadn't seen yet?

Suddenly the calm ripples in the water were disturbed with a large splash, sending the area into chaos. A rock had broken the surface of the lake, sinking in the next second. It happened so quick and so subtly that she wasn't sure it'd even happened. The water calmed once more and the rock was lost to the bottom of the lake.

Once finding the source of the rock, her breath hitched.

He was there at the lakeside, pacing with one hand in his pocket while the other rubbed his neck. His head was downcast and he looked stressed, just as stressed as she was. That's when she realized.

He'd just met his soulmate too. After what she guessed to be almost 90 years. Nearly a century without his soulmate. He was just as nervous and overwhelmed. But it didn't mean he wasn't dying to talk to her. She could feel it, his eagerness. The way his heart ached to speak to her again even if only a few words. She wondered if he could feel her own longing.

"I need to do something. I'll be right back." Y/n excused herself, trying to be as polite as she could. She knew Pepper wanted to carry out her husband's last wish as soon as possible but they both knew he wouldn't have meant it like this. Didn't mean to leave them alone to handle it.

Pepper nodded, releasing a sigh. Everything was beginning to weigh down on her and she knew forcing more onto her shoulders wasn't gonna work this time. "Just call me tomorrow, okay?"

"I will." Y/n assured, looking back to Bucky. Pepper's expression had softened a bit following Y/n's gaze.

She remembered the first time she'd met Tony. At first he was adamant about their relationship, refusing to let her forget they were soulmates. But after what happened in Afghanistan he stopped his teasing. He stopped addressing it altogether. The trauma was too much.

Tony wasn't the same and things changed. But she liked to think it was for the better. He was a better man but he stopped seeing himself as worthy of a soulmate. He forgot what soulmates were for and it crushed Pepper.

She refused to let Y/n feel the same.

"Just meet me at Stark Industries on Monday. Have this time with him." Pepper told Y/n, motioning her head toward Bucky.

Y/n nodded softly, working up the courage to make her way to him. "Thank you."

•••

"What did that poor rock do to you?" Bucky froze at her question, whipping around to face her. She offered a soft smile, trying to break the awkwardness before it became too strong.

Bucky let out an airy laugh, looking back at the lake where he'd just thrown the rock. "Looked at me funny." He replied jokingly, turning back to her. She moved carefully toward him, coming to stand at his side a couple feet away.

He wished she would stand closer, close enough for him to put his arm around her. Close enough for him to hold her tight and never let her go. But he'd respect the distance. He'd give her space.

There was a buzz in the air as she stood there next to him, as if everything was falling into place. It felt like the atmosphere had shifted, that the stars had aligned. After all these years without her, he finally had her.

And all he could muster was, 'looked at me funny'?

"Must've been some look." Y/n replied with an amused smirk.

The silence was overwhelming but welcomed. Of course both wanted to fill it with anything and everything they could say but neither were ready for that. They each had their secrets, their pasts. They were at a conflicting crossroads.

"It's strange. I've waited my whole life to tell you everything but now I don't have anything to say." Y/n let out a strained laugh, looking down at her sling. She wanted so badly to see her countdown, to finally confirm to herself that she had him and that he wasn't going anywhere. But her countdown couldn't promise that. Only fate could keep him at her side and so far fate hadn't been kind.

"Me too." Bucky mumbled, cringing at how awkward he believed to be making things.

'Say something.' His mind cursed at him. 'Say anything.'

"You're really beautiful." He spoke suddenly, his face flushing at how stupid he sounded. He meant it of course. She was stunning despite the cuts and bruises along her features. Gorgeous even with the dirt and dried blood that traced her hairline. Enchanting regardless of the sling that obstructed her movement. She was beautiful.

But saying it aloud after only speaking a few words to one another made him feel silly. So long ago he'd call complete strangers beautiful without a second thought. But was that right with his soulmate? Were there certain things he should do? A way to act?

All his worries faded away with her smile, such a glorious thing he couldn't wait to see everyday for the rest of his life. If she would have him.

"Thank you, Bucky." His name slipped off her lips so naturally it was as if she'd been saying it all her life. And maybe she had. Fate worked in mysterious ways and his mother was a firm believer that soulmates always found one another. In this life or another. He'd never believed it but now he had. They'd found each other, despite time and despite space. They were bound to one another and he could feel that Y/n knew it too.

"I have a place in the city. It's where I was heading before...you know. Not that meeting you was an inconvenience, I honestly never thought I would. Not that I didn't want to, I dreamt of it...-I'm rambling now." She sighed. How had she managed to make it even more awkward?

"It's okay." Bucky assured, unable to stop his smile from growing.

"What I was trying to say is I'd like you to stay with me, if you want. It might be a little bit more comfortable than whatever lodging Fury is getting for you all. I have a spare room." She offered, her heart heavy with the idea of Steve being gone. He'd chosen the life he wanted. Unfortunately she wasn't a part of it.

"I'd like that." Bucky nodded, his heart swelling at the suggestion. Not only was it one of the few kind acts he'd experienced since escaping HYDRA, it was also an invitation from his soulmate into her life.

He wouldn't squander the opportunity.

"Great." Y/n smiled, releasing the breath she'd been holding upon his answer. A part of her had been scared of rejection. But she guessed things with soulmates were different. They were easier. Maybe it was the assurance that they were the right match or maybe it was just the overall feeling of belonging that came with the other's presence.

Soulmates were easy.

At least she thought.

•••

When they arrived at Y/n's apartment, she was grateful she had cleaned up before everything that had happened. She'd never brought a man home before, let alone her soulmate and she wasn't sure what to say or do. The only person that she'd even brought to her apartment was Steve and by then their conversation flowed as easily as breathing.

"You have a nice place, very um, modern?" He offered, not knowing what to say himself. It'd been so many years since he'd even talked to a woman and he wasn't even sure he knew how to flirt anymore.

"Thank you." Y/n replied quietly, glancing around the apartment as if trying to see it through his eyes. She remembered Steve mentioning the lack of photos once when he first started to live there. Did Bucky think it was weird?

"Can I get you something to drink? Water, coffee, wine…?" She trailed off. Bucky looked at her, taking notice of her own nerves.

"Water is fine." He answered, smiling at her softly in any attempt to soothe her.

It seemed to work as she smiled back at him, turning toward the kitchen to get a glass of water. "Make yourself comfortable. You can watch TV if you'd like." Y/n called to him, taking a moment after pouring the glass to lean against the counter and sigh, hiding away from the source of her anxiety.

She'd always wanted to meet him. She had wanted to have him in her life from the moment she'd heard about soulmates. But what she never expected was how awkward it would be. She'd always been told that soulmates clicked instantly but they hadn't quite clicked yet. And she could tell Bucky felt it too.

Perhaps it was everything they'd been through? Maybe it'd changed them both enough to where clicking was harder? Or maybe they'd never click.

Her heart dropped at this, sending a surge of pain through her chest. Would she even be able to live with herself if they never clicked? She'd lost everyone, would she lose her soulmate too?

Suddenly a booming voice echoed from the living room, frightening her out of her daze. Quickly grabbing the glass, she dashed into the living room, plucking the remote from the wide eyed Bucky. Hastily, she muted it letting out a panicked sigh as the reporter continued on with his story silently.

"I'm sorry, I-"

"Don't be sorry, really. Trust me that's not the first time I've had to rescue a 100 year old vet from my TV. It just seems to know who to attack." She nervously laughed, setting down the remote. The tense air seemed to relax at that and Bucky found himself chuckling along with her.

The accident, though startling at first, made her feel more at ease. It was something familiar and for the first time since their meeting, there was no awkward feeling between them.

"Here," Y/n handed the glass to him with a shaking hand, trying not to let him see how much had spilled out onto her hand when she rushed into the living room.

Bucky accepted it from her, his fingers lingering on hers for just a moment before retracting.

He could feel her but not like his hand used to. The metal digits no longer felt warmth or pain or tenderness. He could feel when something touched him but all the things that made touch special were stolen along with his real appendage. He wished he'd reached out with his other arm, that he could feel the softness of her skin, the warmth.

"I-I'm not sure how this goes. I rehearsed this a thousand times when I first got my countdown but things are so much more different than I expected. My parents always raised me on the false ideal that we'd meet somewhere cliche like a coffee shop or something." She shook her head, immediately regretting her words the moment they left her mouth.

"I don't really know either. Honestly, I never thought I'd meet you." He sighed, his heart aching with the decades he'd lived believing that he'd die before meeting her. But now she was here and he was ruining it.

Y/n frowned with him, racking her brain for anyway to save their less than perfect first day. "Maybe we should start over." She suggested, putting out her free hand to him.

"Hi. I'm Dr. Y/n L/n." She introduced, deciding there couldn't be harm in starting over. Their meeting was emotional and overwhelming and after all it was just awkward. But Y/n didn't want to remember it that way and neither did Bucky.

As she had hoped, he smiled, putting his own hand into hers and shaking it gently. "Sergeant James Barnes. But everyone calls me Bucky." He replied, his smile growing as she looked at him, her eyes conveying all the warmth she was too scared to admit.

"It's very nice to meet you, Bucky." Y/n smiled, studying the way he looked at her and trying not to let herself blush.

"It's an honor to meet you, Y/n."

•••

The rest of the evening continued this way, an occasional small bount of awkwardness along with some silence before another conversation arised. It was just like getting to know a stranger and while it wasn't what she had anticipated when she thought of meeting her soulmate, it still made her happier than she had ever been.

"So, I started to climb up the fire escape because I definitely wasn't going to wait outside in the snow storm for Steve to rescue me." Y/n explained matter-of-factly, earning a small chuckle from Bucky.

"Of course." He replied shortly, already picturing the woman before him beginning her journey up the fire escape.

"Turns out Steve was already home but he was in the shower. He got out right as I made it to the window and he nearly threw me several stories because he thought I was a burglar. He was so mad, he called me crazy about a hundred times before finally letting me in." Bucky laughed at her retelling, watching the glimmer in her eyes as she relived it.

"Like he's one to judge. When we were younger he'd lose his key all the time, had to start hiding one under a brick at his ma's apartment." Bucky told her, his heart aching slightly as he thought of the last time he'd had to help Steve. His mother had just passed and Bucky was pleading with Steve to stay with him. But Steve was independent, always had been.

"He wanted to change the locks when he found out I lost my key, which I mean, is a fair request but realistically there are about 3 million apartments in the city and the chances of someone finding this one was impossible. Also when you add Captain America into the mix, the chances of your apartment being robbed are quite slim." She explained. She still hadn't changed the locks now that she thought about it and Steve was gone.

And besides she'd survived before Steve. But it didn't make her miss him any less.

"You can never be too careful." Bucky replied, shrugging softly.

"I suppose." Y/n mumbled, looking down at the coffee table where her feet were resting. It always drove Steve crazy but it never stopped her. Yet now she almost felt compelled to do so. Some way to respect his wishes. "What was he like? Who was Steve before the serum and everything?" She asked, slowly dropping her feet from the table.

The question stunned Bucky, leaving him speechless for a few short moments. Several words popped to his mind to describe Steve but they were all things he knew Y/n would already have witnessed.

"He was selfless and brave. And stupid. So stupid. Never knew when to sit a fight out." Bucky chuckled fondly, though it faded just as fast as it had come. "He fought for me when I was on the run from HYDRA. He lost everything to save me."

"Sounds like Steve." Y/n didn't lift her gaze only offering a weak smile at her beloved friend's description.

Y/n was exhausted, so much more tired than she believed possible but given her physical state it made sense. She yawned, trying to muffle as much of it as she could, her eyes watering at how harsh the yawn had rolled through her.

Bucky hardly noticed, a bount of guilt settling on his heavy heart. Bucky didn't deserve saving. But Steve fought for him anyways. And now he was sitting next to his soulmate, the very soulmate he dared not envision a life with for fear of a broken heart.

"How weird that Steve befriended us both, nearly a century apart. And I thought fate was fucked." Y/n laughed quietly, drawing Bucky out of his thoughts. Another yawn took hold of her and Bucky noticed this time, a soft smile gracing his features as he watched her nose scrunch and her hand pathetically fail to hide the yawn.

"It's been a long day." Bucky said quietly, earning a small nod from her.

"You're right." She mumbled, trying to fight off the sleep that so desperately wanted to claim her. There was still so much she wanted to talk to him about and the few hours they had spent getting to know one another didn't feel like enough. But her body was protesting every second she spent awake.

With a silent sigh, she stood pacing off toward Steve's room to find Bucky some clothes for bed. Bucky rose from the couch to follow, taking notice of how her breathing seemed ragged, almost forced.

It worried him but he didn't say anything. Maybe this was normal? He had no idea. He hadn't thought to ask Steve about her condition and asking her now didn't seem right. So he merely watched her with a silent and concerned gaze.

However once reaching Steve's room, Bucky's attention was stolen. It was clear Steve lived in this room. Whether it was the religiously kept bed, neutral colored clothes hung neatly in the closet or the drawings and pictures strung along his walls, Bucky knew this was where Steve had spent a great deal of time.

The pictures varied in a great deal of things, from NYC buildings drawn from the point of view of the street to beautiful scenes from different cities that Bucky guessed Steve had seen during missions. But one in particular caught his eye, pinned carefully to the wall with a tack.

It was of Y/n from her shoulders up, her head slightly turned down. He found her face was quickly becoming a source of comfort. Just seeing her put him at ease and he'd only met her that day.

The picture gave him that same kind of feeling, the feeling that made his chest soft and his muscles relax. It was a way he had yet to see her, so peaceful and calm.

She was reading a book or maybe a magazine? Her eyes focused on the words but there was a daze behind them as if she were daydreaming. He wondered what she had been thinking about. Wondered why she no longer wore her hair like it was in the portrait. Or maybe she did and he hadn't seen it yet?

There were so many things he'd yet to know and a part of him was furious that he had missed all this time with her. He wanted to know her as well as Steve had, wanted to know everything that made her Y/n. He was furious with fate for stealing that from him.

"Here, these might be comfortable enough for sleepwear. But honestly none of Steve's clothes look very comfortable." Y/n spoke, sending a wary look toward Steve's closet where she'd just been.

"So, Steve lived here?" Bucky asked, under the impression that Steve was more of a frequent guest. Y/n tilted her head with a small nod, looking around at the room.

It had once been her office, the very office she used to hold her sessions in. But once branching out to old cafes, the room was often vacant. Thankfully that was around the time she met Steve and the room quickly found a new purpose.

"Yeah, I mean he still went to the compound sometimes but this was his home. He didn't pay rent but he helped out around the apartment, most of the time." Y/n shrugged, smirking slightly. "He had a thing about dishes." She spoke, raising a brow at Bucky as if he might have some sort of background on the interesting flaw.

"He used to say didn't like his fingers to get wrinkled but I always knew it was because soggy food made him sick." Bucky explained, smiling at the memory.

Never before had he met someone who knew Steve as well as he did. It had always been just them. And while he was gone it was just Y/n and Steve. Now they were desperately trying to piece themselves together. It was strange, finding someone exactly like him, yet so different.

"You know, for a guy who's seen so much violence, I didn't think that soggy food would be his Kryptonite." Y/n remarked, walking over to the bed and sitting on the side.

"Kryptonite?" Bucky asked, the word foreign to him. Was it like Vibranium?

Y/n paused. "Oh um. Superman? From the comics? He was still kind of new around your guy's time. 1938, I believe." She explained.

Bucky nodded softly, vague memories of Steve mentioning it to him resurfacing. "I remember seeing them but I never really read them." Bucky replied, watching as she adjusted her sling.

"Well, Superman's one weakness was Kryptonite. I guess Captain America's weakness is dishes." She chuckled, seemingly unaware of how distraught her condition made him.

A silence fell over them after that, nearly killing them both. It was almost annoying how badly their conversation flowed. The most at ease they'd felt with each other was when they first met. When they were in each other's arms. It took everything she had not to stand up and throw herself into him again.

"Well, I um, I'm going to um-..." Y/n mumbled, trying to dismiss the thought. Bucky nodded softly, shifting the clothes in his hands. A simple pair of sweats and a t-shirt.

"Yeah." He murmured, watching quietly as she stood making her way to the door.

There was a tension between them, the kind that made Bucky's heart clench and his brows furrow. Y/n could feel it too. But neither acted.

"Goodnight, Bucky." Y/n spoke barely above a whisper, the weight of the tension crashing down on her.

"Goodnight." He replied, his eyes trailing her until she disappeared down the hall.

The weight lifted as soon as she was gone but he soon found himself missing it. Why was talking to her so impossibly hard? He tried telling himself that with time things would get easier but time was the only thing he was no longer willing to give up. He needed to try something different.

Needed to reapproach the whole soulmate thing.

Part fifteen

Taglist:

@jessyballet

@eldahae

@kissesofdeadforme

@wantingtobekorra

@sxphiiwrld

@lunaticbarnes

@indecisivedolly

@saiyanprincessswanie

@whatifwedo

@arguedquill1226

@lunashaw57

@3aileypage

@mela-noche

@homosexual-having-tea

@steve-rogcrs

@yayrainday

@buckybarnesdevotee

Sorry for such a delayed update, I've been so busy lately but I hope to start updating regularly again! Let me know if you'd like to be added to the taglist!!!

[maryroyale]

The lovely @curiouselfqueen tagged me on this one. (Thank you! I love these things.)

Uh. I have *feelings* about these? I have no idea why I feel so strongly, but... uh... there you go.

deep violet or blood red? Both? Not at the same time, but I love both. Purple and red are both power colors, but they convey very different things. Old ladies are allowed to wear both because they have the power to pull it off.

sunshine or moonlight? Oof. My default answer is moonlight? Some of the medication I’m on makes my eyes super-sensitive to sunlight. I’m like a damn vampire. Even on cloudy days I need sunglasses. I like seeing the sunlight through the trees when I’m in the woods? It’s pretty and far less painful.

Don’t get me wrong—I do love the moonlight. It’s so beautiful. Winter moonlight and summer moonlight are gorgeous.

80s music or 90s music? How dare you! Don’t speak to me or my 874 music genres ever again. Seriously though, I really love music. I listen to a wide variety of genres and some artists span decades. I love new wave and synthpop, but I also love pop punk and the swing revival. I can’t say one decade is better than the other.

orchids or dahlias? I like to garden, and from a gardening standpoint it’s dahlias all the way. Orchids are a wildly diverse species (over 25,000 types), but the pretty, delicate orchids they sell in stores are not hardy and require a lot of intensive, specific support. They’ll die if you plant them outside where I live. And the garden outside is what makes me happy and brings me joy.

garnet or ruby? These are such different stones. It’s almost like asking if I like chocolate milk or cola. Yes, they are both brown and you can drink them—but they’re really not similar.

Garnet— it’s semi-precious, plentiful, in use since antiquity. A decent go-to stone for jewelry. Like any gemstone, the color is determined by the type of impurities, so garnet can be almost any color. Blue garnets are the rarest. The Mohs scale for garnet depends on those same impurities because some can actually strengthen the hardness of the stone. Generally 6 to 7.5 on the Mohs scale.

I like garnets. Depending on the talent of the jeweler you can get lovely pieces set in silver that won’t cost an arm, a leg, and your soul. It was also my mother’s birthstone, so there’s that.

Ruby— Occasionally confused with spinels, rubies are pieces of corundum that contain the impurity chromium. Corundum that contains the impurities iron, titanium, vanadium, or magnesium are usually blue and referred to as sapphires. (Pink sapphires are actually poor quality rubies that the jewelry industry decided to rebrand to dupe the public. Similar to “chocolate diamonds” and other attempts to sell gems that don’t meet the criteria for their type.)

Corundum is a 9 on the Mohs scale. They highly sought after, have a rich mythos surrounding them, and feature prominently in history.

It seems like a lot of hype to me? They’re sturdy pieces of jewelry, not prone to breakage, but they ought to be for the price you pay. They’re pretty, I’ll grant you that.

moths or butterflies? Well, one is nocturnal and one is diurnal. One is fuzzy and stocky and one is smooth and slender. One is drab and one is brightly colored. I feel like I should picks moths on principle. I love Luna Moths. But butterflies are so very, very pretty. Moths I guess?

Aphrodite or Athena? Okay... so, um, here’s where it’s going to get heated. I apologize. I am *specifically* addressing how Athena and Aphrodite were worshipped/treated in Greek myths. I’m not looking at proto versions from Minoa, Mycenae, or Phoenicia. I’m also not looking at later syncretizations with other cultures e.g. Rome. It is the Greek myths that matter here because those are the myths and attitudes that were directly incorporated into Western culture. We’ve learned a lot about their origins, but *those* myths and attitudes were *not* incorporated into mainstream Western culture.

Athena was either born from Zeus’ head or his thigh. Either she has no mother—Zeus is her only parent—or Zeus swallowed her mother Metis (wisdom, prudence, counsel). This is critically important. In Athenian law, the father was the only legal parent. Mothers had no legal rights to their children at all. Athena is a very real symbol of that.

She is often portrayed as the goddess of wisdom, handicraft, and war. She is a goddess of industry (wine and olive oil). The thing we must ask is what kind of wisdom? What kind of war?

Plato argues this in Cratylus— that Athena’s wisdom could be a number of things from divine knowledge to moral intelligence. I think it’s important that Plato, one of Greece’s most celebrated philosophers, and more important one of the philosophers most embraced by Western Culture praised this choice of “moral intelligence.” [see Plato’s stance on poets in The Republic.]

Athena’s war is not the war of Ares, which is tied to passion and emotion. Ares represents the brutal aspects of war where humanity gives way to cruelty and inhumanity. Athena’s warfare is rational and “just.” Athena makes war on behalf of the city-state. Athena makes war to defend the government.

Athena’s purpose in myth and in poetry and song is to support the government. She is the shield of the king. She upholds and enforces the status quo. Look at her role in the Orestes trilogy. She supplants the Erinyes [the furies originally hunted and tormented ppl who committed matricide]. She decides that Iphigenia’s murder didn’t matter. Clytemnestra (Iphigenia’s mother) didn’t have the right to revenge for her daughter. Orestes was *justified* in murdering his mother because she killed his parent, his father.

Aphrodite also has a motherless birth, but it’s more incidental and spontaneous. Kronos cuts off his father Uranus’ genitals ( like you do ) and tosses them into the sea. Aphrodite is born from the sea foam. There’s a different feel to Aphrodite’s myth. An independence almost. Yes, a male god was involved because it’s a Greek requirement for any child, but it’s in such an incidental way. There was no purpose or intent on Uranus’ part. He had no control over her birth.

Aphrodite is an incredibly independent goddess. She owns her own sexuality and has autonomy over her own body. She is often referred to as the wife of Hephaestus, but in both the Iliad and Hesiod’s Theogony, Hephaestus has wives with different names and Aphrodite is unmarried.

A goddess with this kind of freedom and power in her own right—not tied to a husband or male family member (sorry Artemis!)— is almost unheard of. It makes Aphrodite unique and interesting.

TLDR: I prefer Aphrodite.

grapefruit or pomegranate? Pomegranate. For so many reasons, not the least of which is it’s associations with death and fertility. It’s a lovely contrast and a reminder that death brings forth life e.g. Nurse logs.

angel’s halo or devil’s horns? Oof. This is another rant, guys. Horns as a symbol of divine power are used throughout history and throughout the Indo-European culture. From Egyptian gods like Amun and Isis to Hindu gods like Śiva to Canaanite gods like El and Yahweh, horns have been used to show their power and might. Moses has most famously been depicted with horns due to murky/difficult translations of the Hebrew verb keren/qaran, which can mean BOTH “to send forth beams/rays” and “to be horned”.

There was a concerted effort to associate horns with the devil/evil/bad. Horns are also used to imply fertility/abundance, and that may have played into the perception of horns as devilish. Moses with horns was used as a jumping off point to demonize Jewish people during the Medieval period in a variety of European countries and cultures.

Halos, too, have been used across history and cultures as a symbol of divine power. Sumerian literature talks about a bright emanation that appears around gods and heroes. Chinese and Japanese Buddhist art shows Buddhist saints with halos.

I choose horns because I choose to reclaim that divine power. I reject the idea that either symbol is wholly good or wholly evil. I reject the idea that sexuality by itself is evil/wrong.

sirens or banshees? Both!!! I must admit a partiality to Sirens that is based wholly on my preference for the sea/ocean.

lorde or florence + the machine? Both!!! I love both groups and I’ve listened to their albums so many times. I will admit that I end up listening to Lorde more often when writing.

the birth of venus or the starry night? Huh. I’m going to assume that you mean the painting by Boticelli, even though there’s more than one Birth of Venus.

Honestly, Venus Anadyomene (Venus rising from the sea) is my favorite. It’s her origin myth and anyone could paint it, draw it, write about it, and put their own spin on it. It is malleable because it is myth. It lives on and changes and grows with us. Boticelli’s version is particularly lovely.

Starry Night (1889) belongs to VanGogh. No one can really recreate it without copying his style or his vision. Verschuier’s The Great Comet of 1680 Over Rotterdam could never really be confused with Starry Night. Not even Munch’s Starry Night (1893) could be confused for VanGogh. The two paintings are wildly different in subject matter despite the fact that their subject is the night sky.

I doubt any modern painter would dare. O’Keefe called hers Starlight Night, and I can only guess that others would follow that naming pattern of not quite using the title Starry Night.

Boy, I bet @curiouselfqueen is regretting tagging me now... sorry?

[maggies-scribblings]

Marichat #4 for that drabble prompt list? :3

“Who gave you that black eye?”

Thanks for the ask, @lady-charinette! I got a little carried away, so I will finish it later… 😻

Adrien Agreste was a peculiar young man. When he was most stressed out and overworked, all he wanted to do was go out and run around. Naturally, having magical jewellery with the ability to turn into a cat hero came in handy on these occasions.

Today was one of those days…

School all day with an impromptu photoshoot during lunch — It’s just some pick-ups, Nathalie said. You’ll be done in thirty minutes, she said. He was definitely not done in thirty minutes. Instead, not only did he miss lunch but also got to the first class ten minutes late. He could hardly hear her Mme. Mendeleiev’s scolding over his stomach growling.

After school, he had fencing and Mandarin lessons, and a pesky akuma attack to round the day off. He could hardly keep his eyes open during dinner. Thank goodness Father isn’t here, he thought as he munched on his food, slumped over the dinner table, supporting his head on his left hand.

And yet, by the time he finished his homework and preparations for the next day, he felt revived. The physical exhaustion had worn off as he wound down, leaving him absolutely wired. He knew he wouldn’t be able to sleep until he let off some steam.

Moments later, a black-clad catboy was running, vaulting and whooping over the rooftops of Paris. All was peaceful — it always was after an akuma attack — so there wasn’t any real need to patrol.

He decided to stop by his collège on the way home, as there had been break-ins at other schools to steal computers… Nothing to report here either.

As he zoomed over the school’s rooftop to make his way back home, he caught sight of a familiar form on a balcony across the street, under some colourful fairy lights.

In the months that passed since that night, when Marinette pretended to like Chat Noir, he realised he liked her. Much more than he thought. It would be really nice to hang out with her more in his civilian form, and he sought her company often, but she was still awkward with him. When he visited her in the catsuit, though… it was almost as if she was a different person. He stopped by once in a while to check in on her. They confided in each other (without revealing details) about their respective unrequited loves and broken hearts.

As he jumped closer to the bakery, Chat Noir noticed Marinette was resting her head on her arms as she stood leaning on the railing. She seemed to be talking to herself. Was she crying? Concerned, he approached, landing on the bannister gently, so as not to startle her.

“Good evening,” he greeted, softly.

Marinette straightened and looked up, holding an ice pack to her right eye.

“Oh! Hello, Chat Noir. What are you doing here?”

She pulled away the ice pack to flip it to the colder side.

“Whoa!” Chat Noir couldn’t hold back his worries. “Who gave you that black eye?”

He leapt down onto the balcony and approached her to get a better look.

“Is it very bad? It was just pink earlier… I was hoping the ice would keep it from turning black.” Marinette fretted, picking up her phone to turn on the camera in selfie mode.

“Crap! I look horrible,” she said, mostly to herself.

“Let me see.”

Chat Noir delicately used a claw to lift up her chin and swiped her bangs out of the way with the other hand.

“It’s not too bad. I’ve had worse,” he quipped, and was rewarded with a small smile. He then straightened up and continued in a mock-serious tone, wagging a finger in the air. “My prescription is to keep icing your eye hourly, but never more than twenty minutes at a time. You can also steep some chamomile tea bags, let them cool down in the fridge and then apply.”

Marinette laughed at his schtick. It was exactly what he was aiming for. He liked to hear her laugh. Changing his act, he menacingly punched his own palm.

“Now, are you going to tell me who I’m going to beat up?”

Marinette hesitated for a fraction of a second.

“No one. Unless you want to beat me, haha! I just— punched myself… sewing!”

“How can anyone punch themselves sewing?” He tried not to laugh — and failed. “Sorry, I just can’t see it.”

“Well, it happens. I was… sewing leather! You see, leather’s tough, and you have to pull the needle real hard, then sometimes it just — whoosh — and —”

Marinette mimicked sewing movements as she described it (she’s too adorable!)

“I didn’t know you were into leather…” he purred, bending down to her eye level, and winked.

Marinette pushed him away by the nose, balancing herself on one foot.

“Don’t you start, you silly kitty!”

He froze. Something about her tone of voice, the way she pushed his nose playfully…

“Well, little lady, if you can’t handle a little flurrrting, just let me know!”

“You really are a tomcat, aren’t you? I bet you flirt with every girl in Paris.”

Chat Noir held his hand to his heart in mock offence.

“Why, I would never! I only have eyes for my lady and my little lady!”

“That’s still one lady too many for my taste!”

“Unfortunately, my Ladybug won’t give me the time of day.” His voice had lost all playfulness now. “I’m a hopeless, loveless kitty.”

He thought he saw her deflate somewhat.

“Poor kitty. I know exactly what that’s like.”

“The boy who broke your heart?”

“Hmm-hmm.”

“What— the guitar guy?” Chat Noir felt a rumble of anger bubbling in his chest. “The one with the weird eyelashes?”

“No!… And he has nice lashes, they’re just short.”

“Huh. I thought you were going out with him.”

“Definitely not. We hang out sometimes… but I just can’t open myself up to him as much as he needs me to.” She leaned against the railing again, looking towards the Seine. ���He can read my emotions the way nobody else ever has, and sometimes I just can’t handle it.”

“Huh.”

Adrien’s chest ached. Weirdly, some part of him was happy to find out Luka was out of the picture.

“So… there’s another boy?”

“Yes. It’s hopeless.” Marinette sighed, but did not cry. Instead, she shook her head and breathed a bitter laugh. “I can’t even speak properly when I’m around him. I even told him I don’t like him like that… twice! And then pushed him and another friend together… I think they’re dating now! So yeah, I cock-blocked myself!”

“Language!” Chat Noir didn’t know what else to say except joke or pun. Anything to keep her from crying. “You should say cat-blocked instead: it’s nicer and a brilliant pun!”

She chuckled again.

“So, I cat-blocked myself. I might as well have told them to elope to Japan. I just made a fool of myself in front of the ice-cream man… again. And ran away… again.”

“Japan, huh?” The truth was right before his eyes, but he refused to admit it. Not without more information. “That’s a long way away for two French kids to elope.”

“Oh, she’s Japanese. I can just picture them, living a perfect life, winning fencing competitions together… Posing on the cover of gossip and business magazines as the new power couple in the industry…”

“Wow, you’ve given this a lot of thought, haven’t you?” He turned to her. “Don’t tell me it’s that model boy all the girls swoon for!”

“Bingo!”

Chat Noir had to sit down. He slid down with his back against the railing. How did he never see it? Was that why she behaved so weirdly around him? That would explain the posters, and the valentine card, and… He hit his forehead in frustration so hard Marinette looked down at him, confused.

“What’s wrong, Chat Noir? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, Marinette. Just wondering what’s with this Adrien guy. All the girls seem to be fighting over him.” He added, smirking, “ I’m prettier, funnier, and better dressed than him. Sure, he’s rich and handsome—”

“That’s not why I lo—like him!” she snapped. “It might be the reason for those other girls, but not for me.”

“Why do you lo-like him then?” He asked in a whisper.

Marinette sighed and sat on the floor beside him, fidgeting with the now warm ice pack.

“I kinda hated him at first. I thought he was another stuck-up, spoiled, rich brat, like Chloé.”

Chat Noir couldn’t speak, so he nodded for her to continue.

“There was a silly misunderstanding, and I gave him the cold treatment. And he still took the time and effort to apologise. He was so sad by the thought of a total stranger not liking him…” She sighed, a small smile returning to her lips. “Then he made a kind gesture, a small one, but so sincere… he gave me his umbrella though it was raining,” breathing a chuckle, she added, “then, of course, I had to get an attack of the clumsies and make him laugh.”

Adrien remembered that. He remembered how angry she was at first. How she heard him out even if he was friends with her bully. He remembered the tingle he felt when their fingers touched. How she laughed with him when the umbrella snapped close on her.

“When I heard him laugh, I was a goner. Yes, he’s a model, rich and famous… but it was his kindness that I fell in love with.”

“Fell— in love?”

He could hardly breathe. The last years flashed before his eyes. When they paired up for the tournament. When she helped him run away from his fans. When she danced with him at Chloé’s party. His head was spinning so much he couldn’t stand up.

Of course the coolest, prettiest, kindest girl he knew was heartbroken. She was right there, at the same time he chased after Ladybug in vain. She was his everyday Ladybug, and he was too blind or too stupid to see it!

Ladybug would never love him. He would always be the sidekick. He couldn’t even protect her properly. It was his only job. Even that same day, the soccer akuma hit her with a ball on the face. Hard. The Miraculous cure had healed most of it, but he could see her right eye swelling visibly even under the mask before they separated. He told her to ice it, too.

It was ironic that his everyday Ladybug hurt herself in the same eye. What a coincidence…

Chat Noir was hyperventilating now, as all the pieces of the puzzle fell into place. His perfect vision went blurry all of a sudden. He heard Marinette calling his name. Marinette? Ladybug? 

Everything went black as he tried to call her name.

To be continued… 

Send me an ask with a number and a LoveSquare pairing (Including SnekMouse, etc.)

Prompt list here.

[Conclusion]

[pathogenic]

Chapter 3: The Hag

Prologue

Chapter 1: The Necromancer

Chapter 2: The Prophet

Chapter 3: The Hag

Chapter 4: The Brigand Vvulf

Chapter 5: The Brigand’s Cannon

Chapter 6: The Drowned Crew

Chapter 7: The Siren

Chapter 8: The Swine God

Chapter 9: The Formless Flesh

Chapter 10: The Ancestor

Epilogue

The following weeks I was deep in my training as I sent out the heroes I had assembled into the area surrounding the Hamlet. With the dungeon cleared, it was unclear where we needed to focus our efforts next. While I knew any of the immediate surrounding area was bound to hold something, I preferred to have an order of priority.

While they were exploring the area, I met the most peculiar and concerning man in all of existence. When he arrived, he asked for me by name. I met him in the Town Square to ensure that we were seen by all as I did not have the best feeling when I was informed of him. He stood tall with marks all along his bare chest and arms. It seemed like he was always covered in some blood, usually his own, but I was not aware of that yet. As far as I was concerned, someone bloody and vicious was in my Hamlet and I was expecting trouble.

When I arrived, he broke into a grin and greeted me with a booming voice. He informed me that the closest branch of the Church of the Light had sent him. He asked where the Vestal Julia was as she had stopped writing to them and given the contents of her letters, they found it fitting to have someone look into it. Seeing that the man was not a threat and we were about to talk about a much more… sensitive topic I only saw it fit to invite him back to the Estate.

From there, I had the grim duty of informing him and Julia’s demise. The scarred man did not seemed surprised, but simply nodded. He asked if her reports on an undead Necromancer were true and I confirmed that as well. I saw no benefit to lying to him or the Church of Light. My encounters with their kind had shown that lying was a good way to earn their ire. If these lands truly are cursed by something my Ancestor did, I do not wish to lose their support no matter my personal opinions on their faith.

The man then paused and looked around before saying that he would stay to help purge the evil out of these lands. I was taken aback and asked him if he was even allowed to do that. Didn’t he have to return to his Church and report Julia’s death? He said that no, a letter would suffice. He pointed out that she told the Church of her efforts to reestablish the Light in the Hamlet and with her death, it would be to our advantage to have someone tied to the larger church to help revitalize it. I couldn’t provide any argument against this. I was certain Reynauld would appreciate the help so he was not the only person seeing the revival of the church.

I asked the man what he could bring to the group and he informed me that he had a unique talent for sharing the burdens of another person. He went into a frankly terrifying conversation about how pain liberated him of his worries and his burdens, so he shares this joy with others. I decided I wanted to keep a closer eye on this man and instead of placing him in the barracks we had made for the heroes, I decided it was best he remained close. He offered no argument and said that the feeling was mutual. It was not the most reassuring response, but I could hardly blame him, I suppose. I am the owner of a twisted, corrupted land and I did just have a Vestal killed under my care. After our conversation, I lead him through the estate and had him pick his chambers. He picked a humble servant chamber, and I cannot say I was surprised. Still, I ensured the space was clean and showed him where everything he could need was within the house.

Within the following days, I discovered that his name is Damian. He had been close to me since he arrived, seeming keen on discussing either Julia or what has been happening in and around the Hamlet. I admit I am still apprehensive speaking to him. I do not wish to receive a religious lecture about death or about cleansing the lands.

Thankfully, I did not have to wait much longer for news to arrive. Apparently, there were two things that required my attention. The first was the Coves. There were reports of inhabitants entering them and never returning and there is no indication of why they entered in the first place. The second was more concerning, however. There was a strange fungus encroaching from the Wealds. Whenever someone moved to try to harvest it or stamp it out, it released spores that either caused the person to become confused, or it poisoned them. It took a good number of spores to kill someone, but if it was pushing in on the Hamlet, I did not want to take any risks.

Once I had received this news, I devised a plan with Paracelsus to set fire to the fungi from afar as it was the only conceivable way we could think of to eradicate it. With help from the others, it seemed we had a good way of combating the issue and keeping them locked in the Wealds, but I suppose it was only a temporary solution at best as eventually the mushrooms seemed to react to our reagents as well. Poor Boudica needed a rescue party since she was so lost after being confused by a plume of spores.

It seemed luck was eventually on our side again, however. Shortly after our solution started to fail, a woman by the name of Missandei arrived. She is a gifted marksman with a crossbow and while she was more soldier than survivalist, she claimed to have some understanding of the Wealds. While she admitted that she was not familiar with the mushrooms we were struggling with, she still knew enough to lay some poisons by firing them into where they grew the densest. This at least provided us with footpaths where there were no mushrooms so we could move further in and eradicate more of the pests without risking losses.

It was shortly after we started to see a serious decline in the number of hazardous mushrooms that I received a letter from a curious address. The man who delivered it to me could hardly remember how he came upon the letter, much less how he came to my estate to deliver it. My only theory is that he was under the influence of their spores and someone took advantage of that, or that perhaps someone purposefully used them to the same effect. Regardless, the letter came from someone living deep within the Wealds. It seemed like such an impossible notion that someone could live surrounded by the vicious wildlife and that mushrooms, but I was quickly learning that the Hamlet and its surrounding area seemed to thrive on the impossible.

The letter was addressed to my ancestor, the same one who reached out to me and begged that I return to the Hamlet to redeem it. The letter expressed surprise that he had returned and invited him out to their hut in the woods. They said they’d leave him a path so he could arrive unharmed. It was about this point that I received a report that despite our best efforts, the fungi were back in full force. It was at this point that I started to suspect that there was a supernatural element to them and that perhaps whoever wrote this letter would know more. On top of that, if they knew my ancestor personally, I figured they would be able to answer some questions about him.

The following morning, I set out with Paracelsus, Missandei, and Reynauld. We found a path that was clear of mushrooms and I felt that was confirming my suspicions that whoever wrote the letter likely had something to do with them. We pressed cloths to our faces to keep out the spores to the best of our abilities should the need arise and pressed on.

We stuck to this path, being careful that our movements did not set off their spores, or the creatures consumed by them that occasionally moved and walked. The path cut through a Graveyard that once belonged to the Hamlet but had long since been abandoned since it was so far from the town proper to be safe. To our surprise, we were not the only people there. It seemed someone else had noticed the opening and decided to take advantage. A woman in strange clothes paused as she saw us. She almost fled the scene, but thankfully there was only one path she could follow, so catching her was no problem.

I asked this woman why she was digging up the graves and she ever so kindly asked me what I thought. Of course she was robbing graves, there were some rich people buried in that graveyard. No doubt they were buried with their finest jewels and she wanted them. I asked her why she wanted their jewels and she informed that she needed the money, but she also just liked the look of them. Ignoring the second part, I offered her employment instead. There was no sense in having her rob our graves when we could put her to work. The woman was just as surprised as the rest of the group, but reluctantly agreed. Though she said that if she felt she wasn’t receiving fair pay, she would leave and likely take some gold with her. I still let her in.

The grave robber by the name of Audrey then joined us, helping us travel further into the Wealds and to the hut that belonged to the mystery author of the letter. Audrey was mercifully light footed and would often scout the path for us to make sure it was clear, though I am certain it was also to keep some distance from Reynauld as he attempted to lecture her on her grave robbing habits. The humor of him, a known cheating gambler, lecturing someone else on not committing crime was a touch humorous to me, but I refused to explain why I was laughing.

Soon enough we arrived at the location of this hut, unharmed just as promised. The doors opened as we arrived and a woman stepped out to greet us. Though it was clear she was by no means a normal woman as she had plenty of markings on her clothes and there were herbs I knew to be arcane in nature hanging from her belt. She looked confused and baffled once she realized that we were not my ancestor and asked what the meaning of this was, she was very clear about who she wanted to see in her letter. I informed her that to the best of our knowledge, my ancestor was dead. He sent me letter begging me to arrive and no one had seen him since. The woman gave a horrible laugh before shaking her head, saying something about how he “must have finally done it”. I asked her what she meant, but she simply waved her hand, dismissing the question.

She moved to sit near a large cauldron that she had outside her home. As she settled down, she took out a knife and took some of the herbs that were hanging off of her belt and started to cut them into the pot. Finally, after a moment of silent cutting, she asked if I knew what I had been summoned to the Hamlet for. I told her that I had been asked to help cleanse it of whatever evils my ancestor had released. The witch shook her head, her expression becoming grimmer as she said that the cycle begins again with me. At that point I was reminded of what the Prophet had said, and I could feel my veins run cold. I still did not know what this cycle was and yet two separate people mentioned it. It had to be a pattern of some kind and I was no closer to understanding it than I was weeks ago.

I wanted information. I wanted to know just what I had apparently done by existing in this space, so I asked the witch if she could explain what this cycle was, but she did not take kindly to me asking anymore questions. At that point she started to spat about me being ungrateful. As it was, I did arrive to her home uninvited and started to demand answers of her. While I could understand her irritation, I felt I had to press the issue. The idea that I was causing something awful by stepping foot into the Hamlet was too great to ignore, but she told me to find my own answers. She said there had to be plenty around the Hamlet to work with, and she “did not deal with simpletons”.

At this point I was at a loss for words about this issue, so I asked her if I could ask a question on a different subject. She reluctantly said that she would, so I asked her about the mushrooms. How did she know that there would be a path? Did she know what powers them? At that point, she smiled and said that they were hers. She used them for her spells and potions and she always needed lots of them, so she allowed them to spread. I pointed out that the spores were hazardous to humans, but she simply shrugged and said they never bothered her, so it was no problem of hers.

I don’t know where the thought came from, but I was so bold as to ask her if they were tied to her. I asked if the mushrooms would survive without her. She paused, staring me down, challenging me, and said that no, the mushrooms would die with her. There was something dangerous in her voice, but something pushed back, and I lunged. For the longest time, I did not and could not understand what drove me to attack the witch, but one moment I was standing before her, the next I had a sword stuck in her arm where I had missed her chest. She howled in pain and started to attack. My companions, though reluctant, did rush to my aid.

The battle was not long. Though she performed strange, terrible spells that nearly cooked poor Reynauld alive, she was no match for Missandei and Audrey’s amazing shots and Paracelsus’ blight filled bombs. As she fell, it was just as she had promised. We could see the mushrooms in the immediate area begin to whither and fade away. The air was suddenly that much clearer, and we could walk back without fear of losing our way due to the confusing, poisonous spores they released.

As we walked back though, I could not help but replay the words of the Hag and the Prophet in my mind. If there was a cycle, then it had something to do with my ancestor and me. If my ancestor had released something evil, then was I expected to do the same. Was that “something evil” the cause for my outburst or was I growing irritable myself with stress? I didn’t know. I didn’t know which answer was worst for it meant that either I was not in control of my actions, or I was, and I did something I was not proud of.

Regardless, from that day on I decided I needed to watch my actions closer and watch for any signs for something awful lurking within me. I hated the thought but doing anything else felt irresponsible.

[pernatius]

Lost in Space Part 10: Ch 2

Previous 

Summary: Significant changes have occurred while she was unconscious. One of them includes the imprisonment of Syco. Part 10 deals with the unnamed Space Explorer’s reconciliation.

Lost in Space on Tumblr

Lost in Space on ao3

My twin fell on her back. She coughs out blood the moment she lands. I hope it’s just a spoonful of blood rather than a cup. I’d prefer her not to lose any more blood. The two of us, Kaishi and I, slid across the bumpy ground before making an abrupt stop. She’s at the edge of the cliff, whereas I’m splashed with the small stream of blood. I choke on some of it as it flows into my mouth; the iron taste overwhelms my senses before I try to lift myself with shaking arms. My arms scraped pretty severely. I manage to flip right side up, but my efforts are rewarded by one of the crowd’s members, the ten-foot-tall hairy alien one, the third one with horns, lifted me by my collar and huffed into my face. I felt my skin be pushed back because of it. There’s no way I should know this beast’s name, but I do. “Syco?”

Saamuki and Mikrovos attempt to help Kaishi up and away from the cliff’s edge, but she pushes their efforts off of her. She helps herself up. S1Y, Skeema, and Khavas remain with the crowd, and apparently, I know too many aliens, mainly Tauvoxes. Ojos is nowhere to be seen, but I hear her voice, though difficult to understand, as Kaishi’s voice pierces through this silent landscape. The fire has died down, and so have the animals from the forest below. This wasteland reeks with death everywhere I dare to glance. My twin hasn’t budged a single inch from her pool of blood. I fear it’s become her resting place. I’m not sure about anything right now but what I am sure of is my feelings. I’m beyond pissed. I’m weaponless, my armor won’t do much to protect me, down a leg, have for some time, and I don’t have enough energy to fight. So, I know I’m in over my head, but as Syco is distracted with the long speech Kaishi gives, which I ignore, I headbutt him.  

We clutch our heads as those around turn their attention back to me. My vision is blurring. Everything around me is spinning. I can feel my blood drip down from my forehead. Somehow I sit back upright. With gritted teeth and a growl, Syco takes a step towards me, but he only gets a step closer because Kaishi gets between us. Her back is facing the Tauvox’s current commander, but he is no commander here. The back of her hand is raised towards him. He relaxes, retraces his step, and then stands stiff. 

“Still trying to be the hero, love?”

“Unfortunately, yes. Ugh!” It felt like someone was slamming a sledgehammer into my head. Tauvoxes are too durable. Hitting my forehead against Syco’s skull felt like I slammed myself into a cinder block. 

“Why?”

A simple question, but it’s one I have trouble answering. I’ve heard the graphic stories of the millions who couldn’t make it out of the cities, and I’ve seen the actions being done to thousands and a handful right before my eyes. In each case, I couldn’t do anything but watch. I was either too young, too weak, or too scared. I’ve had nightmares about my powerlessness. The guilt and regret ate me up as I tossed and turned for two decades, never getting sleep. At one point, I wanted to end my life because I thought it wasn’t ever going to end. They tried to exterminate us all because they needed a new home. Those bastards could’ve easily wiped out all of us all at once, but instead, they wanted to prolong their entertainment in torturing us until our bodies gave out. So, I should say that I continue to be a hero because I want to seek vengeance and make up for all the times I couldn’t do anything. Instead, here I was, finding it difficult to do just that. I merely stared at her until I answered, “I don’t know.” 

She reached her hands out towards my sword and dagger. They shook, then flew towards her hands at such a speed that it pulled me towards her and then had me land on my face. When they connected with her palms, it sounded like a bomb went off. It was like magic. She never showed herself to have such power, but Kaishi never showed she could revive herself. Kaishi moved both weapons above her head, towards each other, and when they collided, it was like thunder erupted. Light magically flashed from them, blinding me. 

I open my eyes to see both have fused. A sword of two equal, massive blades is gripped in Kaishi’s hands. She shifts the sword so that only one of her hands is holding it, and the other is resting at her side. The blade is balanced and angled on her shoulder. Somehow those intense blades didn’t cut right through her shoulder and tear her in half. At this point, I shouldn’t be questioning how much any of this makes sense. I need to focus on surviving. I can make sense of all of this later if I make it out of this. 

“You’re confused and hurt. Love, I can help you with that.” She removed that monstrous sword from her shoulder and placed it on her other bare palm. It didn’t cut her. 

“Help me by killing me.” My voice cracked. “Be honest with yourself, love. You’ve been wanting death for years, but you were too scared to do it on your own. I promise I’ll make it quick and painless,” she cooed out. She pouted, and when she noticed my displeasure, she snapped her expression to be one filled with laughter. “Besides, you literally can’t stand. Were you planning on crawling away from someone with two legs?”

“Maybe? Probably. Yes.”

“Adorable, but I am serious about my promise.”

“Shove that sword down your throat and choke on it.”

Again, she laughs at me as she drags the sword across the rocks beneath us. She could’ve just lifted it with both hands rather than let it cut between stone and create an ear-bleeding screech, but she’d instead relish in my squirming, huffing, and gulping. I tried doing what I say I’d do, crawling away. My attention should be towards trying to flee, but instead, I notice my twin’s right leg twitching. 

Kaishi is overhead, reverting my eyes’ focus to her smile. She lifts the sword up above her head and has the blade pointed directly between my eyes. I look around, and that’s when it hits me. It’s childish, but when you know you’re about to die, and it’s a way to prolong your life, even if it’s for a few seconds, who cares about what it is. I splash the bloody water into her eyes. Kaishi stumbles back, still gripping the sword, but one of her hands is trying to wipe away my desperation. Behind her, I hear Syco and the crowd members move. Kaishi orders them to remain where they are, but her temporary blindness isn’t the reason why they’ve moved. The reason should be a shock and an impossibility, but I accept it because of everything that’s happened. 

My twin hops from Syco’s head and dashes towards me. I cover my face, hoping to protect myself from the impact, one of which I soon understand I won’t feel. Again, a light blinds me, and with it, Kaishi finally wipes off the mess because she screams, “No!”

Once the light disappears, I flutter my eyes open, and after weeks, nearly two months of being disabled, I have my right leg back. That’s not all. My outfit has changed. I look like a knight with the same monochrome color scheme as my twin’s outfit. My twin is nowhere to be seen, but I have a feeling I know where she is. Not only that, but with my change, I know who she truly is. As I get up using my newly formed right leg, Kaishi has a tantrum. She stomps, jumps, and screams. The crowd and I step back, but neither of us can flee as she turns herself around to face the group that was behind her and opens her mouth wide. She begins to suck up the crowd. After she does, she grabs the sides of her face. She screams yet again but begins to laugh as a flash of golden light envelops her. I’m not blinded this time, but I wish I was because I see faces, familiar ones, pop out of her flesh. They scream as she continues to laugh and transform. I try to stop her transformation from finishing, but I can’t even take a step towards her because somehow that light is pushing me away, so I’m left to watch once again. 

She finishes with a white cloak engulfing her with a circular symbol on the back of it. She no longer has her sword, but now she has a horrific wrinkled face. Hundreds of faces have been squeezed between her wrinkles, each with eyes crying out blood. 

“Watcher,” I whispered the realization under my breath with eyes wide and another gulp. My body moved for me as I flung my right arm to the side and what came next is the emanation of a familiar blazing two-handler, almost like my previous one before she stole it, but without all the sci-fi elements. 

With the flick of her finger, her feminine features, what was left of them, disappear. Her face is now covered by a faceless mask. “Not quite.” Its voice is deep but not quite masculine. It is powerful. The figure’s voice makes me feel like my organs are on the brink of exploding. 

“A Lord? Here? But this is just a—”

“Now.” They wiggle their index finger from right to left before continuing, “Don’t ruin my fun just let.” I puke out. “Gross.”

“Why are you here? What am I doing here?” I press my free hand against my forehead, which has now healed. Although, it hurt trying to remember. “I was battling Syco...Shit! I need to get out of here.” I turned around one moment, and the next, I’m right in front of the Lord. The Lord moves its hand towards me, and I move my sword towards it. It goes right through where its stomach should be, but the Lord just laughs. The faces stretched across their arms open their mouths and laugh as well, but they’re forcing it out as they’re crying out blood as well. The sight grosses me out, but it does not warrant another puke. I don’t have anything else in me to throw up anyways, but my guts feel like purging again when the Lord begins to talk again. 

“Sorry, human. I must admit to you that I am a little bit insane. Okay, I’m pretty much insane.” To my surprise, one that nearly has me let go of the sword, the Lord caresses my chin. It’s gentler than how Kaishi did, but considering she was this Lord, it’s another surprise, I suppose. “Although, it’s because of my insanity that helps me be such a great performer. I’ve played so many characters, yet all were believable. How were my lines? You think they were passionate, eh?”

“Passionate, maybe, but not believable.”

Sure, I can’t see the Lord’s eyes through that mask, but I felt them. I felt the Lord’s judging glare. They sigh. “A shame.” It lets go of my face. “Two thousand years and yet I can’t produce the perfect play. Playing director can be straining.”

“Everything that is and was here was made by you?” I shouldn’t be surprised about a Lord’s power, but I still am amazed. Maybe it’s the shock that I am before another Lord that drives me to question because I’d rather wish this not be true.

“Of course, but you were the producer. Can’t create a world out of thin air. This is all in your subconscious. I just pull strings. You called me over here, after all. 

“You are such an interesting person. Maybe the most interesting case I’ve ever had to deal with. Actually, no. That short woman with the four eyes was way more interesting than you.”

There’s a power difference between us. The Lord is the one in power while I am not, but I buried down my fear when I clutched its cloak and pulled them closer to me. “What did you do to Ojos?”

“No need to get so worked up, human. Nothing happened to that poor, old hag. She didn’t submit to my offer.”

“Offer? You tried to kill her just like you did with me?”

“Of course. Souls are a delicacy. I haven’t eaten one in so long.” In the corner of my eye, the faces on their arms licked their lips. I pulled my sword off of the Lord and my grip and jumped away from them. In the process, they jerked forward and began to laugh. I clutched my sword in both hands as the demonic figure raised their head and slid one of their hands on their face, mimicking how Kaishi brushed away her hair. Then, they flew towards me. I swung, but before my blade connected with the Lord, I woke up to my hand right about to open an airlock and heard Saamuki calling out to me. I lower my hand, and I let her embrace me. 

[drsilverfish]

Adam x Michael!Adam in 15x08 - The Integration of the Self and the Shadow

Hey again folks,

Time to write a little something about the Jungian significance of the relationship between Adam and Michael!Adam in 15x08 and what that means for our heroes internal journeys towards The EndTM  (I’m specifically focussing on Dean and Cas in this meta, but Sam is our hero too, of course).

Just a quick refresher -  Jung, who was a psychoanalyst with a bit of a mystical bent, called the unconscious, the Shadow.

That means those elements of the personality or self which the conscious self is unaware of, or rejects. For Jung, that doesn’t mean the Shadow is inherently negative; it can contain much creative potential, when it is contacted and integrated by the conscious mind (often in dreams, guided through therapeutic work). However, when the Shadow is not recognised, it can negatively control a person, because then (repressed) it often leaks through, particularly in the form of projection - whereby rejected parts of the self are projected onto others and become the target of rage or other negative behaviour.  

“The shadow is a moral problem that challenges the whole ego-personality, for no one can become conscious of the shadow without considerable moral effort. To become conscious of it involves recognizing the dark aspects of the personality as present and real. This act is the essential condition for any kind of self-knowledge, and it therefore,. as a rule, meets with considerable resistance.”

Aion: Phenomenology of the Self published in The Portable Jung, edited by Joseph Campbell, Penguin Books, 1976, p. 145.

Integration with/ acknowledgement of the Shadow is key, for Jung, to healthy psychic growth and individuation. It’s not something you do once and then it’s done, either, although the first conscious work to encounter one’s Shadow is often particularly revelatory, but it’s a continuous process of self-reflection.

Image credit: http://www.kerosene.digital/reviving-art-shadow-puppets/

I wrote a lot of Jungian themed meta in S14, where that motif was used particularly overtly in the writers’ room, in relation to Castiel’s encounter with the Shadow entity which guards The Empty (wearing his face) and Dean’s encounter with AU!Michael possessing him (wearing his face). 

Dean and Cas’ Shadow sides are multii-faceted (as are all our Shadow sides) and include, for example, Dean’s low self-esteem and fear of abandonment (triggered by his mother’s death when he was a kid, and the subsequent pressure his father put on him to be a carer to Sammy) and Castiel’s feelings of low self-esteem and unworthiness (triggered by his journey, over and over again, into doubt against Heaven, and his development of “feelings” for humanity/ The Winchesters/ Dean). We have seen them both struggle individually with these issues, and often be negatively controlled by them, and now these issues are also coming to a head between them, as they lie at the root of their present “break-up”. 

In the show’s queer subtext, Dean and Cas’ Shadow sides can also be understood to include their (closeted) queerness, and their anxiety about how powerfully they each love the other, yet fear the other does not love them back.   

There is a link below to my S14 meta masterpost, and if you scroll right down to the bottom, all the Jungian-themed meta is collected together in a post-script, for a deeper background dive:

https://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/184628959784/drsilverfish-s14-meta-masterpost

So, what does this have to do with Adam and Michael in 15x08? 

We discover in 15x08 that the two of them are in a relationship - not a trapped vessel chained to a comet - but two beings who share Adam’s physical body, take turns at the wheel of conscious control, and have mutually supportive conversations with one another in their shared mind-body. They listen to each other and they trust each other. 

Dean is flabbergasted, after his own recent, tormented and coercive possession by AU!Michael (always a metaphor for his Shadow-side, including the repressive ghost of John Winchester in his head and, in subtext, his closeted queerness):

Dean: “Wait... Michael lets you talk? I mean he lets you... be?”

Adam: “Uh... yeah.... In the cage we came to an agreement. We only had each other.”

Of course, this is not the first time we, or Dean, have come across an angel-vessel relationship like this. In 12x10 Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets we were introduced to the relationship between the angel Benjamin and his human vessel Madrid:

CAS: “Benjamin is always very careful. Long ago, he found a powerfully devout vessel in Madrid, and her faith, it... she gave him everything – her trust and her body.” DEAN: “Wait. So Benjamin's a woman?” CAS: “Benjamin is an angel. His vessel is a woman. But it – it's – it's more than that. She's not just his vessel.” SAM: “She's... She's his friend.” CAS: “Yeah. Benjamin would never put her in unnecessary danger.”

Thanks to SuperWiki for the transcript:

http://www.supernaturalwiki.com/12.10_Lily_Sunder_Has_Some_Regrets_(transcript) 

I’ve always loved this exchange, because it emphasises the way in which human gender doesn’t apply to angels. We could say that angels are genderqueer and that Benjamin and Madrid’s relationship was a queer one, in the sense that it transgresses human and angelic “norms” (although, that also imposes a somewhat human frame of reference).    

It’s noticeable that both Adam AND Michael are better beings than they were before they got locked together in the Cage in Hell in 5x22 Swan Song. Adam seems less bratty, more reasoned, and Michael seems less arrogant, more willing to listen (to Adam, and hence to others). That is because their mutually supportive relationship is a metaphor for the integration of the self and the Shadow.

In a mirror for Dean and Cas, Adam and Michael!Adam have a conversation in 15x08 where they can clearly understand their respective Daddy issues:

Adam: “Maybe you don’t know your Dad as well as you think you do... Parents keep secrets, right? Does it hurt to ask the question?” 

Michael: “Yes, it would! It would mean that I doubt him, the good son, the favourite doubts his father!”

Adam: “Do you still care about that? After he left you in the Cage?”

Adam, of course, was himself kept as a secret by John Winchester from his other sons. And Michael (in a long-running parallel to Dean) here mirrors an earlier version of Dean, when he was “Daddy’s good little soldier”, as well as mirroring an earlier version of Cas, when he was Heaven’s obedient servant (in between his many rebellions and brain-washings).

Adam and Michael!Adam’s good communication and mutually supportive relationship, which, again, like Benjamin and Madrid, we can read as a “queer” relationship, by angel and human normative standards, is a positive sign-post for our heroes - both in terms of Dean and Cas separately being able to turn, and face, and thus integrate with their respective Shadows (they’ve already done significant work on this, but there is more to come) and in terms of Dean and Cas’ relationship (which Adam and Michael!Adam’s “queer” angel/ human relationship is also a mirror for). Dean and Cas will, this mirror tells us, eventually, be able to talk honestly, and supportively, with one another. 

But first, they must go on a symbolic underworld journey, back to Purgatory, which is again, a Jungian metaphor for the encounter between the conscious self and the Shadow.  

Michael!Adam says, “There’s the door!” as he opens up a rift to Purgatory and holds up the angel-binding handcuffs, requesting to be freed, in exchange. Which, provides us with a symbolic image suggesting that Dean and Cas’ return to Purgatory together will, despite its painful difficulties (which, as I’ve said in my 15x08 spell meta here:

https://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/189656694954/the-purgatory-spell-in-15x08-love-death-and-an

may involve a literal, or perhaps figurative, enounter with death) be a journey that will set them free (in terms of their encounters with their own Shadows and thus their ability to communicate better with one another):

Jung even described the encounter with The Shadow as a narrow doorway:

“The shadow is a tight passage, a narrow door, whose painful constriction no one is spared who goes down to the deep well. But one must learn to know oneself in order to know who one is.”  

Carl G. Jung, The Archetypes and the Collective Unconscious, vol. 9, pt. 1 p. 21.

And we could thus understand the Leviathan blossom, in this reading, as symbolising the flower of self-knowlege that grows in the deep recesses of monster-land, aka the land of the unconscious. 

N.B - My usual disclaimer applies - reading the queer subtext in SPN does not promise an overt, unequivocal, “confetti, it’s a parade” queer romantic denouement, But, subtext IS part of narrative.

[mymarvelbunch]

Be Your Own Hero - Steve Rogers x Reader (part 7)

Masterlist

Summary: You’ve lost all your family and most friends in The Decimation. Refusing to believe their deaths are permanent, you dedicate years to find a way to reverse it. Upon finding something that might help, you search for the Avengers’ help. It’s Steve Rogers x Reader, but in reality it’s mostly Badass!Reader. Also, Non-American!Reader

Warnings: none!

Note: Y/Co = your country. Y/Ci = your city; Y/N/L = your native language.

This part is going to be told mostly from Steve’s POV, along with a few other characters. Reader will come back in part 8!

Previously: Reluctantly, she took it and gave her broken timer to you. “I’ll come back for you, Y/N. We don’t risk lives.” “Bring everyone back first”, you screamed, trying to be heard in the midst of the noise. Someone was entering the temple. “Only then you come back for me. Now go!” With no hesitation this time, Nebula left.

Edit: I fixed a small detail on parts 6 and 7. Originally I had the Mind Stone being collected in Titan, but it was the last Stone Thanos got, on Earth. I made minor corrections so it would fit movie canon in this aspect.

Part Seven

Battle of New York, 2012

“This looks even crazier in person”, Scott said as past Hulk was seen throwing some Chitauri to the sky.

“Banner would be so embarrassed if saw himself like this”, Natasha said. At her side, Clint nodded.

“Okay guys”, Steve stepped up. “If I remember correctly, Loki is about to be defeated. We have to get to the Tower and get the Tesseract and the Scepter. Try not to die. We’ve survived worse.”

“I can pull myself and tiny Scott up”, Clint offered. “Not sure how you and Nat will do it, though.”

“This is an alternate timeline, right?”, Natasha replied. “Our actions here won’t impact our future, only theirs. Honestly, I think we can just step in.”

Steve nodded. “You have a point, Nat. But maybe Clint and Scott should go through the window anyway. If something delays us two, at least they will be already in place and can try to retrieve the Stones without us.”

The other three nodded. Scott activated his suit and shrunk. Clint placed him inside a vest pocket and headed to the avenue. He and Natasha headed to the Tower’s main entrance. “So, you and Y/N?”, Natasha asked.

He did his best to keep a straight face, being caught off guard. “This is really not the time to set me up with her, Nat”, he replied. “Don’t think I didn’t realize what you’ve been doing these past weeks.”

“It’s worked, hasn’t it?”, she said, grinning, as he pressed the elevator button, so far going unnoticed amidst the chaos.

“Like I said, not the time”, he deadpanned and turned to the elevator. Thoughts about you tried to creep into his mind, but he quickly pushed them aside. He’d wonder about what you meant to him after the Stones were all collected.

The elevator ride was as fast as he remembered. There was a time when he had his own floor in that Tower, designed by Tony himself. Many thoughts of guilt and regret came over him, but again he pushed those aside. He and Tony have made peace with each other long ago; there was no point in dwelling on past mistakes.

When the doors opened, the scene that greeted them was kind of funny: 2012 Clint and 2021 Clint were pointing arrows at each other, and 2012 Tony was giggling non-stop while the Tesseract was slowly falling down from his hands - probably Scott’s doing. Everyone else just looked confused, including Loki.

2012 Steve stepped out as soon as he and Natasha got out of the elevator. “Stay where you are, whoever you are”, he said, in a commanding voice that did nothing but annoy him.

“That’s not happening anytime soon”, he replied, taking some steps closer. “We are from the future, and we have urgent business.”

“Yeah, that’s what this other guy said a minute ago”, 2012 Clint said, not taking his eyes away from his future version. “Not buying it, fake Cap.”

He sighed, noticing Natasha slip away. She’d probably have to deal with her own past self to retrieve the Scepter, so he concluded it would be better if he distracted the rest of them. “Bucky is alive”, he told his past version. “HYDRA is still active-”

“Oh, now you’re just making things up”, his past self interrupted.

“Really? Go tell ‘Hail Hydra’ to Pierce and Runlow. See if I’m telling you any bullshit.”

That called Tony’s attention. “You really want us to believe you’re a real Cap when you say ‘bullshit’?”

He rolled his eyes. “I fought in the war for years, I can actually do a lot worse than ‘bullshit’.” He turned to his past self. “You know that pretty well.”

“You call us out for cursing″, 2021 Clint replied, smirking.

“That was one time, in 2015. It’s been six years, get over already!”

“If I may speak”, Loki said, adjustig his position as best as he could, “I was raised by a witch mother and learned magic myself-”

“Yeah, we noticed”, past Clint murmured.

“-and those folks are telling the truth. All four of the are from eleven years in the future.”

Thor nodded, although he was frowning. “My brother is right this time - we were raised by the same woman, so I know a thing or two -, but I fail to notice four companions from the future. I can only see three.”

As if waiting for that exact curtain call, the Tesseract finally fell from Tony’s hands. Scott instantly turned back to his normal size, Tesseract in hand, and, at the same moment, Natasha grabbed the Scepter. “Let’s go!”, she exclaimed, suiting up along with Scott. Past Natasha tried to get her, but 2021 Clint was faster in hitting her with an arrow, activating his Quantum suit right after. Only he remained, but he gave no time for the others to get him.

Avengers Headquarters, 2021

The first thing Steve heard was Rhodes asking, “Have you gotten enough of those?”, to which Tony replied affirmatively. Before he could ask what they were talking about, though, he noticed someone was missing. Or rather, you were missing.

“Nebula”, he began, “where is Y/N?”

She closed her eyes for a moment, but, when she opened them again, it was with a look of determination. “We need to gather the Stones first. I’ll tell everything while we do it.”

He opened his mouth to protest, but she was already on her way to the table where the new Gauntlet was at, along with Scott, Natasha and Rhodes. Banner had already begun to put the Stones in place, with Danvers’ help. 

“My brain...”, Nebula began, “it’s connected to a sort of intranet. When we were about to leave, past me’s brain connected to mine... and our location was given away.”

“But you escaped”, he said. “What happened to Y/N?” He held his breath as he waited for her answer.

“My timer broke”, she said. “I should have been the one to stay behind, but Y/N... she took her own timer off and switched with mine. Said it would be safer if she was the one to be kidnapped, because that way they couldn’t try to send my past version to fool you.”

Steve stood up and started pacing around. Once again, you were the most sensible one in this team, but he couldn’t bring himself to calm down. The thought of you being at Thanos’ hands, all alone...

“Why are we not going back there yet?”, he asked, more venom in his voice than intended.

“She made me promise we’d make our wish first”, Nebula said.

“I know you’re worried, Steve”, Tony said behind him. “We all are. But thing is, if we bring everyone back first, we’ll have more people to aid us in that rescue. I assume Thanos is with his army, right?” Nebula nodded. “So, we need an army of our own.”

Tony was right. Nebula was right. You were right. But still, Steve’s heart was on his throat. All worst possible scenarios popped up in his head. Faintly, he felt two people gently push him back to the couch.

Flashes of the last weeks passed through his mind. You two had a mildly rough start, thanks to his (reasonable) initial distrust. But soon enough he warmed up to you, especially when he saw your brief interaction with Tony’s little girl.

He opened up to you while training and watching movies. More than he usually did, but there was something about you that made him want to tell everything. Maybe it was your compassion, which he saw first hand more than once. Maybe it was your contagious laugh, especially when you watched weird YouTube videos when things started to get too heavy, too dark. Maybe it was your smile, your eyes, your soothing voice...

At that moment, he realized he had fallen for you in the span of a month. And now you were in grave danger, and he had to wait for the rest of the team to be revived to go to your rescue.

Speaking of which, he was so lost in thought he missed the part where Bruce was chosen to wield the gauntlet and snap his fingers. He was brought back to reality by Tony. “Raise your shield, Cap”, he shouted. “And stay as far as possible.”

He did as told, standing up from the couch, and took a few steps until his back touched the glass walls. Bruce screamed in pain as he wore the gauntlet, but managed to snap his fingers all the same. Thor was instantly by his side, checking if he was okay. Meanwhile, Clint called his wife, and Scott went to the window. “Everything is coming back guys”, he shouted. “Even plants and animals!”

He sighed in relief. “Now”, he then said, “we need to gather ourselves to go get Y/N back.”

Nebula nodded, followed by everyone in the room. “How are we going to do it?”, Bruce asked, massaging his burned arm. “Most are in Wakanda, and some are out in space.”

“Technically, we have time”, Tony said. “We’ll go to the exact time Nebula left Y/N, regardless of how long we wait for them to come to us. What we do need, though, is to contact them. Does anyone have King T’Challa’s phone, or something? Or maybe-”

He was interrupted by a sling ring appearing in the middle of the room. A man in a cape stepped out, followed by Peter Parker and... aliens. “We have to hurry”, the man said. “Thanos is currently trying to figure out a way to use Y/N Y/L/N to come to 2021. If he succeeds, your efforts will be in vain, and the whole universe will be doomed. There is no time to waste.”

He faintly heard someone calling him Strange (so he must be the wizard he heard so much about), while the man himself opened more sling rings. Bucky and Sam stepped out of one, along with Groot, Wanda, T’Challa, Okoye and Shuri. Wong, Nicky Fury and Maria Hill from aanother ring. A female warrior, who Thor called Lady Sif, stepped out of a third. A woman Scott called Hope came from a fourth, and Pepper showed up in a fifth, suited up in blue and silver armor.

He sat back on the couch, mesmerized. People were hugging each other, glad to have them back. Bucky went to him and smiled, which prompted him to stand up and hug him, Before he could do the same to Sam, though, Strange called them out. “There will be time for reunions later”, he said. “Right now, we have to rescue Miss Y/L/N and stopping Thanos from coming back.” He turned to Tony. “Do we have resources to get everyone to travel there?”

Tony nodded. Rhodes briefly explained how 2017 Strange sensed they’d need more Pym Particles. Tony went to the 1975 to get some, while Rhodes broke into Hank Pym’s home in 2018 to get another amount. Tony had already made extra Quantum Suits, which was enough for nearly everyone.

“I think we can leave Bruce out”, Natasha said. “He needs to recover.”

Bruce thanked her for the consideration, and passed his suit to Drax, who was eager to fight Thanos. He and Nebula briefly explained the recent events while Tony gave the suits to everyone who was up to fight. Only Bruce, Wong and Groot didn’t get one - Wong because he’d rather stay behind to watch for threats (since he could alert Strange of them using magic), and Groot because Tony didn’t think of adapting the suit for a tree (Rocket’s design was already unique).

They all gathered around the platform once again. He was in no mood for another motivational speech, but apparently he had to. “I think we all know the importance of this mission”, he said. “Not only we have a teammate to rescue, we have an entire universe to save from destruction. Take care of one another. Try not to die. If injured or exhausted, return to our time immediately.” He took a deep breath. “On the count of five.”

Morag, 2014

Nebula managed to set their timer to the exact second after she left, but there still wasn’t enough time to get to you before Thanos did. From afar, he saw your unconscious body being carried away to the enormous spaceship. “Fuck”, he muttered. Then he shouted, “We have to try to get in the ship!” And started to run.

Thanos’ team was faster, though, and the ship took flight before any of them could get in. He closed his eyes, taking deep breaths to calm himself down.

“My old ship is down there”, he heard a male voice say. “If we get inside it now, we can still reach them. You know where they’re going, Nebula?”

He turned to see Nebula nodding. “I have an idea.”

He followed the man named Quill to another spaceship, which was way smaller. “Okay, it won’t fit everyone”, he said, as if reading his thoughts.

“If any of you don’t manage to get in”, Steve said, loud enough for everyone to hear, “you are free to go back to 2021.”

He could tell there were people who didn’t really want to fight. The praying-mantis-like alien clearly stayed behind on purpose, and so did Rocket with his tree friend. Steve, however, was the second to get inside, followed by Nebula, Nat, Tony and Thor - and then he lost track of order.

In the end, Bucky also stayed behind, along with Okoye, Princess Shuri, Maria Hill, Nick Fury, Strange, Parker, Wanda and Pepper. “Most of them would be useful”, he said.

“I think Strange knows another something we don’t, Steve”, Tony said. “He seemed to have stayed behind on purpose.”

“I hope he damn knows what he’s doing then”, he replied, closing his fists. Natasha sat beside him.

“Everything will work out fine, Steve”, she said with a calm voice. “Soon Y/N will be with us again, and you’ll tell her how you feel.”

He side-eyed her. “Didn’t I say it wasn’t the time for this?”

“Yeah, in 2012. Besides, I saw you realizing your feeling backs in the headquarters. It was so clear in your face, anyone who looked would know exactly what you were thinking.”

“I did!”, Danvers exclaimed. “It was really sweet.”

He rolled his eyes, but a half-smile escaped.

Nebula’s POV

Nebula managed to track Thanos’ ship signal, and Quill disabled his own, rendering them practically invisible. “It’s usually not worth it”, he explained when someone asked why ships didn’t do that all the time. “The ship’s shields weaken a bit, for starters, and being traceable is useful when you are in distress.”

“In Thanos’ case”, she added, “his ship has to leave the signal turned on for his allies to find him. Besides, he is sure no one would try to attack him. As you saw on Morag, his crew is large in numbers.”

“Is there a way to attach this ship to Thanos’?”, Danvers asked.

Quill nodded. “I’ve never tried it, though. If you have any experience, feel free to.” It surprised Rocket and Nebula to see Quill acting this humble, but then they remembered Gamora’s death was still fresh to him. He was probably still in grief mood. It occurred to her that she’d probably face the 2014 version of her sister (and herself). She wasn’t really ready to see her after so many years, especially since she didn’t have memories of their reconciliation.

Danvers took Quill’s seat and, with Nebula’s help, drove the ship until it was right under Thanos’. Then, the human took over and, with a few button-pushing, landed straight on the other ship. “Now”, she said loud enough for everyone to hear, “we have to blow these walls up!”

She could swear she heard Quill complain about the damage on his past self’s ship, but ignored it as Rocket managed to open a big hole on both ships, allowing their entrance on Thanos’ one. She was the last to jump in; everyone had already begun to split up, but she knew where to go.

Gamora was at the end of the corridor, seemingly waiting for her. “Looking for someone?”, she said, facial expression unreadable.

“I think you know who”, she replied cautiously.

Her sister approached her and offered her hand. “My version of you died aiding her escape”, she said as Nebula took it. Then she pulled her closer, whispering in her ear, “She’s on her way to Asgard, in an untraceable escape pod.”

Nebula nodded. She trusted Gamora, even this version, to tell the truth. By 2014, her sister was no longer on their father’s side, and on this day she was about to run away from his control. “We’ll have to take over the ship to get there, though”, she admitted. “The one we used to get here is damaged beyond repair.”

“With the amount of help you brought”, Gamora replied, “it may not be hard.”

She was about to say that many powerful allies didn’t make it to the ship when a sling ring opened in front of them. “Strange”, she mumbled, and turned to Gamora. “Are you coming?”

“Of damn course. I lost my Nebula, and I’ve heard you lost your Gamora. Let’s be together again.” At that, she smiled, and both stepped into the ring.

A huge castle appeared in front of them. Turning back, she saw the others coming through other rings. “Good thing I planted an earpiece on all of you”, she heard Rocket say, and turned back ahead. “As soon as I heard Gamora give Y/N’s location away, I told the wizard here.”

“Then what are we waiting for?”, she heard Captain Rogers say.

“Nothing”, she replied. “Let’s get inside.”

Next

--------------------------

We’ll get back to reader’s POV in the next chapter, but there might be a scene told from Steve’s or Nebula’s eyes. I’m not sure yet.

Taglist (open!): @autobotgirl15-blog​ @starstrucknature @cheeseburgersstuff​ @aamzter2013

[mistystarshine]

the gears that build you

Summary: Running off to help a friend with his ill-advised attempt to dispense vigilante justice comes with consequences. Warnings: Body Modification, Mild Body Horror Length: 2.2k Notes: The piece I wrote for @bnha-steampunk​! I was super excited to be invited on as a guest writer and thoroughly enjoyed participating in the zine. You can also find this fic on Ao3.

Consciousness returned to him slowly. It came in the sort of haze that made him question whether or not this was real at all. The only thing that cemented it as reality was the crushing pain that came with it. It was the sort that made him want to curl up in a ball and scream. But when he tried, he couldn't move.

Midoriya Izuku was no stranger to pain, but this was something new entirely. This was the sensation of being cut open, something pulled out and something else put in, the alien clicks and clacks and creeks of an unholy procedure being performed.

(Except it wasn't unholy. It was necessary. Later, when his mind wasn't as fogged up and bogged down, he would recognize this. For now, all he could feel was fear and confusion.)

Amidst the tapping of tools and clicking of gears, there was a voice. He couldn't make sense of the words being said at the moment. To him, it was just a smooth, soothing rumble, something making a futile attempt to calm him. Something that might provide him with answers.

("Oh dear," the incomprehensible voice said. "I think he's waking up.")

Something tried to break through the fog in Izuku's mind, something important enough to override the pain and the fear. It pushed him to attempt to wrench his eyes open. At first, his eyelids just flickered uselessly. Then, when he successfully opened them, he was met by a light bright enough to force him to shut them again.

("Midnight?" the voice called.)

It would have been easier to let himself slip back into unconsciousness, but Izuku was nothing if not determined. After a few more attempts, he managed to keep his eyes open long enough to make out a few blurred shapes. There was sterile white, brass, black, and peach, gray, and pink roughly in the shape of... A person! There was a person! Someone who could tell him about...

There was a faint hiss, and suddenly a cloud of gas descended upon him. The boy was in no state of mind to even think to hold his breath. Memories began to click back into place just as he inhaled it, the contents of the gas immediately beginning their work of returning him to sleep. At another time, he would have succumbed almost instantly. As it was, the stabbing pain in his arm gave him something to cling to, something to help him resist, even if only for a few more seconds.

"Stain..." Izuku managed to groan out. Unfortunately for him, even with the pain to tether himself to, the fog worked quickly. By the time the figure offered him a nonsensical response, he was already nearly asleep once again.

("It's okay, Midoriya.")

(Then, once she was certain that he was back under, that he would never know she had said it, came a whispered, "you did well.")

*

The second time Izuku began to regain consciousness, the pain in his arm had died down to a dull ache. His body felt heavy. Something important still buzzed in the back of his mind, but it was outweighed by the blanket of exhaustion that had fallen over him. The panic and urgency of his prior awakening had died down enough that the feelings did little more than lean further into that exhaustion. By the time it began to revive, he was already falling back to sleep.

*

It was as they said: the third time was the charm.

Izuku spent several moments lying in bed with his eyes closed. He no longer felt the all-consuming exhaustion that had greeted him last time he started to wake up, but his eyelids still felt like they were made of lead. There was no real reason to open them. Instead, he let awareness slowly trickle back to him, starting with feeling. The sheets covering him were kind of scratchy, unlike the sheets on his own bed. Did that mean that he wasn't in his bed then? Izuku's brow furrowed as confusion trickled over him. He moved his feet around a little, the relatively low pliability of the surface below him bringing his attention to the stiffness of his current resting place for the first time.

Okay, definitely not his bed then.

He began to rake his memory for some sort of answer. It took a little while for anything to come to him through what remained of the fog. When it did, it was sluggish. There were sensations first—fear, concern, determination. Then came the faces. Todoroki, Iida, Stain—

Stain!

Izuku snapped his eyes open and attempted to bolt upright. This proved to be a mistake in multiple ways. The light in the infirmary was bright, forcing him to blink several times before he could actually make out where he was. His movement jostled his arm, sending a fierce bolt of pain running through it. He only made it halfway to a sitting position before his spine automatically stiffened up. A faint whine would have left his lips had he not clenched his jaw hard enough to make his teeth feel like they were going to splinter. Finally, it alerted the other occupant of the room, who called him to attention with a sharp, "Midoriya!"

He knew that voice. Oh, he knew that voice and he knew the chiding, disappointed, worried tone staining it. He knew the scolding that it would soon start dispensing. However, there was something he needed to know before they could get into that.

Izuku turned his head to face Recovery Girl even as the old woman rushed over to him. "Recovery Girl," he said. It came out as a raspy croak. He winced at the sound, but pushed on regardless. "What happened? Are-"

"- Your friends are fine," she interrupted. "It's you that I'm worried about." With a soft 'tut-tut', the nurse of U.A. gently pushed him to lay back down.

Izuku obliged, but not without asking, "what about Iida? How is—"

"—Midoriya." Something in Recovery Girl's tone made him fall silent. Her face was stony in a way that he had never seen before. "I need to know that you understand the consequences of what you did."

Izuku slowly took in a deep breath. It was ragged and shaky in a way he didn't like. It felt like weakness and fear, like the worthless little Deku that had been pushed around on the playground rather than the hero he was trying to become. The Deku that had confronted Stain. The Deku that had confronted Stain and quite probably endangered that heroic future in the process. Paradoxical as it may be, he knew that the latter was the Deku he needed to be right now. He couldn't let himself crumple in front of Recovery Girl. Maybe she wouldn't punch or kick like those old bullies, but his disappointment in himself would ache worse than any bruise.

"Recovery Girl," he began in as steady a tone as he could muster, "I know I broke the rules. And I—"

A sharp 'tsk' cut him off before he could get any further. "Yes, and someone else will talk to you about that. I meant the medical consequences," Recovery Girl clarified.

Confusion was the first thing to settle in. Then, like the progression of frost over a cold stone, it was replaced by dread. He barely registered the faint softening of Recovery Girl's expression. Most of his attention was suddenly glued to his arm. He hadn't forgotten the pain it was in—it was impossible when it was so sharp—but it suddenly seemed that much worse. His mind seemed to wrap around it, cataloging the individual aches and stings, wondering what might be their precise cause even as part of him wanted little more than to just try and ignore it.

Looking at his arm proved to be far more difficult a task than it should have been. That effort was rewarded by green eyes resting on an arm wrapped in white gauze. Simple, innocuous, innocent. It was not an alarming sight in and of itself. No, it was the mystery it represented that made his stomach turn. They had been down this path before. He knew the potential consequences of overusing his quirk.

Izuku felt like he was talking through a speaker miles away as he asked, "is it...?"

Recovery Girl let out a slight sigh. The motion of her shaking her head automatically made him look back up at her. Apprehension and regret was written on her face. It made something in his chest seize and burn for one horrible moment. Then she said, "No, this won't be the end for you."

Izuku let out a sigh. His lungs loosened up and his heart felt like it spontaneously began to beat again.

Based on the sharp look Recovery Girl gave him, it was not a reaction she appreciated. "But I did have to make some modifications," she added.

Izuku frowned. His chest began to hurt again, but this time, it was a different kind of hurt. It was akin to the burn of a muscle after overuse or the way he would feel in the seconds before a punch made contact with his face. Melancholic and resigned, it was the type of pain that was designed to make it easier to withstand an even greater pain that was yet to come.

His gaze traveled back down to his arm in the silence that hung between them. Silence, yet the thundering of blood in his ears made it feel oh so loud.

"Can I see?" he finally asked.

Recovery Girl sighed again, this time audibly resigned. "I suppose it's better sooner than later," she said. "I need to do another check before setting it in a harder cast anyway."

Izuku gave one sharp nod to confirm that he wanted to see what laid beneath, even as his stomach roiled and his throat began to burn.

Recovery Girl retrieved a pair of medical scissors from the side table before approaching him. She moved with the same kind of gentle caution you might expect from someone approaching a deer. The part of him that wanted to get this ordeal over with was annoyed by it. The part that, despite his certainty as to what was to come and desire to face it bravely, was more scared than anything, appreciated it.

The gauze and cotton swathing his arm were cut away in a few deft movements. Izuku was prepared for what he was about to see. Even so, he couldn't help a sharp intake of breath when he laid eyes upon what had become of his arm.

A scattering of angry stripe-like scars came to an end where skin almost seemingly melded into an oval of highly durable plexiglass. The only outward sign of irritation was the light red inflammation encircling the very edges of the modification area, which he knew would fade in time. Through the glass, he could see an array of tiny rods, gears, and metal pull-chords, too intricate and complex for him to make sense of at a glance. In the middle of it all was one giant gear. As he experimentally flexed his arm, fighting through the pain that the motion generated out of a sense of morbid curiosity, the large gear slowly turned, a centerpiece for all of the smaller parts that furiously moved in tandem. Some of them disappeared into tiny holes drilled into the metal plate covering the back of the mechanical pocket, likely interacting with the still human muscles and ligaments. Maybe the connections even went all the way down to the bone.

Izuku took a deep breath and closed his eyes. This was inevitable, he reminded himself. Recovery Girl's quirk worked better with the aide of cybernetics, and from his memory of how his arm had cracked and crunched under the impact of his quirk and Stain's blades, he had created quite the challenge for her. He was lucky that she was U.A.'s top medical mechanic as well as the school nurse.

"You were lucky," Recovery Girl said, seeming to parrot his thoughts. "I was able to get away with relatively minor modifications. But if this keeps happening, the damage might get so severe that I'll have to do full replacements."

A frown tugged at Izuku's lips. "But—"

The severe look Recovery Girl shot him cut him off before a word even left her mouth. "No buts! Society isn't kind to full cyborgs. You have a kind heart, Midoriya, but you also need to think of your own well-being. You don't want that sort of life."

"Okay," Izuku murmured.

Yet as he gazed down at his modified arm, he couldn't help but think that it wasn't so bad. All Might had a lot of modifications, even if they weren't usually visible, and he wasn't any less of a person for it. Any discrimination he might risk facing—well, hadn't he dealt with something similar all his life?

He thought of Stain. Of Iida and his brother. Of what might have happened if he hadn't gotten involved.

Heroism was worth the consequences. Besides, Izuku could handle a few gears.

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

2010s Art: Music, Games, and TV

So I love all forms of art. It may not seem like it since I tend to stick mainly to movies, with the odd cartoon or video game thrown in, but that’s really because movies are more my thing due to not being massive time investments. Like, don’t get me wrong, I gamed, I watched TV, I listened to music, but it was a lot more casual than my deep dive into becoming a major cinephile.

With games and TV, it was mostly issues of money and time respectively. I have a few consoles, mostly Nintendo and Sony ones, and my wife helped me experience Xbox games, but I just don’t have the money needed to experience every good game that comes out. With TV, the time investment is the biggest roadblock, especially when all the best shows have hour-long episodes these days. With movies, I just have to spend 90 minutes to two hours on average; for TV, it’s countless hours I could be watching movies. As for music… well, I listened to a lot, I just don’t feel totally qualified to properly rank and list songs and albums.

So instead of the big decade-spanning list for movies that I’m doing, I’m going to go over some things I enjoyed from the past decade and maybe a few things I didn’t in music, TV, and video games. Here’s a little guide so you know what stuff is something I consider one of my absolute favorites in any given medium - if it’s from this decade, it will be in bold, and if it’s from a previous decade but I experienced it this decade, it will be underlined.

Television

I figured I’d get this out of the way first since it’s the medium I have the least experience with. Let me put it this way: I have seen only one season of Game of Thrones, the first one (and by all accounts I dodged a bullet by dropping that show). I also had the misfortune of jumping in to The Walking Dead right as it was gearing up for its abysmal second season, which turned me off that and led to me only watching an episode here or there. 

I had better luck watching live action shows on streaming. I managed to get through almost all of Pretty Little Liars on Netflix, which was a chore in and of itself; it’s a good show, but boy could it ever get arbitrary and frustrating. Speaking of Netflix, I think it goes without saying that Stranger Things is their best effort; from the likable cast of kids to the awesome soundtrack, even though it never really surpasses season one the show always has something cool going on in one of its plots. My other favorite from Netflix would probably be their take on A Series if Unfortunate Events, which is how you do adaptation expansion right; everything they add feels like it’s in service of fleshing out Lemony Snicket’s dismal world, as well as giving Patrick Warburton an incredible dramatic role as the Lemony narrator himself.

Amazon managed to score two hits in my book. The first is the unbelievably fun and charming Good Omens, a miniseries that somehow got me to love David Tennant and Michael Sheen more than I already did. The second was the gory joyride that is The Boys which while not the smartest or most original superhero satire is definitely the most fun.

While I didn’t watch the whole show and would not consider it one of my favorites, I do want to give props to Hannibal for introducing me to Mads Mikkelsen. As far as I’m concerned, he’s the only person aside from Hopkins worthy of playing everyone’s favorite cannibal. Another show I DO consider a favorite despite slacking on keeping up with it is Ash vs. Evil Dead; I only needed to see a single season of Bruce back with the boomstick to know this show was a masterpiece.

On the animated side I have much more to talk about. Not since the 90s have we been spoiled with so many genuinely great and varied cartoons. We got Adventure Time, Regular Show, Steven Universe… really, Cartoon Network raised the bar this decade and made up for an awful 2000s. They even finally gave Samurai Jack a conclusion, which despite the mixed results, was still a real exciting phenomenon to experience.

Of course, my favorite CN show came from Adult Swim. I am of course referring to Rick & Morty, a fun sci-fi adventure comedy that attracted the most obnoxious fanbase possible in record time. While certainly not a show you need a high IQ to understand and having an atrocious third season, it still manages to be funny and thought provoking in equal amounts. Seriously though. Fuck season 3.

My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic is another great show that I sadly fell off the wagon of around the fifth or sixth season. It never got bad of course but it never really engaged me like the older episodes, though what I’ve heard of the last season makes me wish I’d kept up with it. It was a great show with a lot of heart and character, and I’m not sure we’ll ever see a show like it again.

Netflix did not slack in the animation department; I didn’t catch their most famous show (it’s the one about a certain Horseman) but I did catch their fantastic take on Castlevania, which as a huge fan of the series was a real treat. Where the fuck is Grant though?

My two favorite shows of the decade, however, are what I see as the pinnacle of East and West: Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure and Gravity Falls. 

JJBA is a series I had vague passing knowledge of, only knowing its existence due to seeing Stone Ocean referenced on the Wikipedia page for air rods when I was younger and, of course, the memes that spawned from Heritage for the Future, which were inescapable back in the day. As soon as I got into the series, it became one of my biggest inspirations, teaching me you can be deep, complex, and filled with great character interactions while also being so batshit insane that every new and absurd power is incredibly easy to buy (looking forward to the rainbows that turn people into snails, animators). They managed to get through the first four parts and start up the fifth over the decade; so far my favorite part is four, mainly due to the magnificent bastard that is Yoshikage Kira (played time perfection by D.C. Douglas) and in spite of serial creep Vic Mangina playing the otherwise lovable asshole Rohan Kishibe.

Gravity Falls on the other hand is just a fun and engaging mystery show that manages to excel at being episodic and story-driven all at once. There’s only one or two “bad” episodes across two seasons, and it lasted just as long as it needed to, wrapping things up with a satisfactory ending that still gave fans a few mysteries to chew on. It also gave us Grunkle Stan, perhaps the greatest character in all of animation, the pinnacle of “jerk with a heart of gold” characters who is hilarious, badass, and complex all at once. This is my favorite western animated show…

...but then the last year of the decade threw a curveball and, if I’m being honest, is on par with Gravity Falls: Green Eggs and Ham. Netflix really wanted us to know 2D animation is back in 2019; between this show and Klaus, the future is looking bright for the medium. It’s a fun, funny roadtrip comedy that knows when to be emotional and when to be funny, and it’s all filtered through the wubbulous world of Dr. Seuss. It’s just a wonderfully delightful show.

And on the subject of JoJo, I had a kind of love-hate relationship with anime this decade. The attitudes of anime fans turned me off from anime for a long while. Sure, I checked out stuff like Attack on Titan and Sword Art Online, but neither series really clicked with me. The main anime I loved this decade were ones that started in the 2000s and ended in the 2010s, like Dragon Ball Z Kai and Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood. I suppose I did enjoy My Hero Academia, which is a really fun show with an awesome and varied cast and great voice acting. Love Froppy, best girl for sure.

One of the most unfortunate things about this decade was how many great shows got screwed over by their networks. Sym-Bionic Titan, Thundercats, and The Legend of Korra were all great shows in their own right but were treated like shit by their respective networks. It really makes me upset that stuff like that not only happened, but continues to happen to this day.

But let’s not end on a bad note; let’s talk about the astounding returns old shows got. Invader Zim got a movie as did Hey Arnold, with the latter in particular finally wrapping up the dangling plot threads, but those are actual TV movies so they don’t really fit here; what DOES fit is Static Cling, the triumphant return of Rocko’s Modern Life. A forty minute special, it follows Rocko and his friends as they navigate the modern age, trying to bring back Rocko’s favorite cartoon. Rachel Bighead’s arc in this in particular is pretty groundbreaking and awesome. 

Also awesome was the first few episodes of Samurai Jack’s return, though it did end up petering out halfway through the season and ended on an anticlimactic note. Still, Tom Kenny’s Scaramouche, the sheer amount of continuity, and the awesome final curbstomp battle against Aku are worth giving this a watch. And if nothing else, stuff like this gives me hope for future revivals. What will we see next? Gargoyles comeback? Batman Beyond continuation? KENNY AND THE CHIMP REVIVAL?! Chimpers rise up!

Music

Much like everyone, I listened to a lot of music this decade. There was a lot of shit, and I definitely used to be one of those “wow no one makes good music anymore” morons, but I grew out of that and learned to look in the right places.

Let’s start with the albums I loved the most. Continuing her meteoric rise from the 2000s, Lady Gaga drooped her magnum opus, Born This Way, an album that successfully showcases her skills as she takes on numerous pop styles. No two songs sound the same, and with a couple of exceptions every song slaps. While we’re on the subject of pop stars, Gaga’s contemporary and lesser Katy Perry managed to hit a home run with the fun bit of pop fluff that was Teenage Dream.

Weird Al was sorely missed for most of the decade, but what albums he did drop featured some of his best work. While Alpocalypse doesn’t hold up quite so well, it’s still solid, but even then it is blown out of the water by Mandatory Fun, an album that just refuses to stop being funny from start to finish. And that’s not the only funny albums this decade; aside from artists I’ll get more into later, George Miller AKA Filthy Frank released Pink Season as one of his last great acts as his character of Pink Guy. The album is as raunchy and filthy as you’d expect. And then for unintentional comedy, Corey Feldman dropped Angelic 2 The Core, an album so musically inept that it ends up becoming endearing; it’s The Room of music.

As I gamed a lot this decade I got to experience a lot of great video game soundtracks, but the two I found to be the absolute best were Undertale and Metal Gear Rising’s. I couldn’t tell you which soundtrack is better, and I’ve actually made a playlist on my iPod containing my favorite tracks from both games. Pokemon had solid soundtracks all decade, but they definitely were better in single tracks such as Ultra Necrozma’s theme from USUM and Zinnia’s theme from ORAS.

And speaking of individual songs, there were a lot I really loved. The disco revival in the easel ide half of the decade lead to gems like “Get Lucky,” “Uptown Funk,” and… uh, “Blurred Lines.” The controversy to that one might be overblown, but it sure isn’t anything I really want to revisit.

Corey Feldman may be the king of unintentional comedy, but this decade was seriously ripe with so bad it’s good music. The crown jewel is without a doubt the giddy, goofy “Friday,” but I think the equally stupid but also endlessly more relatable Ark Music production “Chinese Food” is worth some ironic enjoyment as well. 

Meme songs in general were pretty enjoyable, though it came at a price. Remember when everyone tried to be funny by ripping off “Gangnam Style?” Remember when people took that Ylvis song at face value? Irony and satire were lost on the masses. I think the best mene song of the decade, though, is “Crab Rave,” a bouncy instrumental dance track with a fun music video and an absurd yet hilarious meme tacked to it. And then we have “The Internet is for Music,” a gargantuan 30 minute mashup featuring every YTMND, 4chan, Newgrounds, and YouTube meme you could think of (at the time of its release anyway),

Then we get into artists. Comedy music was great this decade, with Steel Panther and The Lonely Island putting out great work all decade, but by far my favorite funny band is Ninja Sex Party. Dan “Danny Sexbang” Avidan and Brian “Ninja Brian” Wecht are pretty much my favorite entertainers at this point, with them easily being able to go from doing goofy yet epic songs where they fuck or party to doing serious and awesome cover albums where Dan flexes his impressive vocals. A big plus is how all of their albums are easily some of my favorites ever, with not a single bad CD, and that’s not even getting into their side project Starbomb. These guys are a treasure.

Then we have Ghost, a Swedish metal band who play up the Satanic panic for all it’s worth. These guys captured my interest when I heard the beautiful “Cirice” on the radio, and despite that song rocking the fuck out, Imagine my surprise when it ended up being only middle of the road awesome for this band! With killer original songs like “Rats,” “Mary in the Cross,” and “Square Hammer” to a awesome covers like “Missionary Man” and “I’m a Marionette,” it’s almost enough to get a guy to hail Satan. I think they appeal to me mainly because they have a style very in line with the 80s, most evident on tracks like “Rats.” 

While I’d hesitate to call him one of my favorite musicians yet (he is really good so far though), one of my favorite people in entertainment is Lil Nas X. From his short but sweet songs that crush genre boundaries to his hilarious Twitter feed, this guy is going places and I can’t wait to see what those places are.

And finally, the guy I think may be one of the greatest creative geniuses alive and who has nearly singlehandedly shaped Internet culture with everything he does… Neil Cicierega. While it’s not like I only discovered him in the 2010s - the guy has been an omnipresent force in my life since Potter Pupper Pals debuted - he definitely became the guy I would unflinchingly call the greatest artist of our time over that period.   Whether he’s releasing the songs under his own name or as Lemon Demon, you can always be sure that the songs are going to burrow into your brain. His Lemon Demon album Spirit Phone, which features songs about urban legends and the horrors of capitalism, is easily my pick for album of the decade. And then under his own name he released three mashup mixtapes: Mouth Sounds, Mouth Silence, and Mouth Moods. All three are stellar albums, but only Mouth Moods has “Wow Wow,” the bouncing track about homoerotic bee-loving Will Smith and outtakes so good they deserve to be on the next album.

Video Games 

Having a PC this decade was great because it let me experience a lot of games I probably wouldn’t have otherwise, like Half-Life, BioShock, Earthnound, Mother 3, and Final Fantasy VI and VII. All of these and more are among my favorite games of all time now, but we’re here to talk about the stuff from this decade I consider great.

It’s hard to talk about this decade in gaming without mentioning Skyrim. Yes, it has flaws and the main storyline is a bit undercooked, but there’s so much fun to be had dicking about in the wilderness it’s hard to be too mad. And if you have mods, there are endless opportunities to expand the game. The same is true for the other game I have sunk countless hours into, The Binding of Isaac: Rebirth. Not only is there a thriving modding community, but it has been supported and encouraged by the creators and some mods have even made the leap into becoming fully canon! It’s always a blast to revisit and see how far I can break the game with item combos.

Surprisingly, Batman managed to get not one, not two, but THREE awesome licensed games this decade! Arkham Asylum, Arkham City, and the unfairly maligned Arkham Origins all kick as much ass as the Dark Knight himself. The former two reunite Mark Hamill and Kevin McConroy as Joker and Batman while the latter features numerous stellar boss battles. The combat in these games is so graceful and fluid, you WILL feel like Batman at some point, be it after flawlessly clobbering two dozen mooks or silently eliminating a room of thugs before they even realize you’re there.

Pokémon had a bit of a rocky decade; it started out strong with the fifth generation, the best games in the series with a great story, region, and sidequests and then just went downhill from there. Not incredibly so, of course - the games were always fun at least - but gens VI through VIII were not the most graceful steps into 3D. Still, every gen managed to produce some of my all-time favorite Pokémon. Gen V had Volcarona, Chandelure,  and Meloetta; Gen VI gave us Hoopa, Klefki, the Fairy type in general, and a gorgeous mega evolution for my favorite Pokémon, Absol; Gen VII had the Ultra Beasts and Ultra Necrozma, some of the coolest concepts in the series, as well as Pyukumuku; and Gen VIII gave us Cinderace, Dracovish, Dracozolt, Polteageist, Hatterene, Snom, and Zacian. And those are just samplings mind you, these gens are full of hits.

Bringing back old franchises yielded amazing results. Look no further than the triumphant return of Doom in 2016, which had you ripping and tearing through the forces of Hell with guns, chainsaws, and your bear fucking hands. This game is HARDCORE. Less bloody and gory but no less awesome was the return of not just Crash Bandicoot, but Spyro as well in remakes that are easily the definitive ways to experience the games. And don’t even get me started on the remastered DuckTales!

Platinum games did not fuck around this decade, delivering Bayonetta 2 and Metal Gear Rising. The former is a balls-to-the-wall sequel to the amazing original Bayonetta that, while lacking in bosses quite as impressive as the first game’s, is more polished and has a fun story and a better haircut for Bayonetta; the latter is an action game so insane it makes the rest of the Metal Gear franchise look tame in comparison. The latter in particular is in my top ten games ever, with every boss battle feeling epic, all the music kicking ass, and Raiden truly coming into his own as a badass.

Speaking of Metal Gear, the divisive The Phantom Pain easily earns its place here. While much fuss has been made about the game being “unfinished,” it still has a complete and satisfying ending even if it doesn’t totally wrap up the dangling plot threads the young Liquid Snake leaves behind. The overarching themes as well as Venom and his relationship with characters like Kaz, Paz, and ESPECIALLY Quiet make this game, with his and Quiet’s being particularly beautiful and tragic. The Paz quest, Quiet’s exit, and the mission where Snake has to put down his men after they get infested with parasites are all some of the most heartbreaking moments in the franchise. But it’s not all tears; there’s plenty of fun to be had harassing Russians in Afghanistan while blaring 80s synth pop from your Walkman. Oh yeah, and fuck Huey.

The Ace Attorney series also thrived, with both Spirit of Justice and Dual Destinies transitioning the series into 3D a lot more graceful than some other franchises while still maintaining the with and charm the series is known for. And if that wasn’t enough for my point-and-cluck adventure needs, Telltale had me covered with The Wolf Among Us and the first season of The Walking Dead. The stories and characters of those games are so good, it’s enough to make you sad they never got a timely sequel or sequels that weren’t shit respectively.

This decade is when I really got into fighting game, though I’m not particularly good. I supported Skullgirls (and am even in the credits!), and got into Ultimate Marvel vs. Capcom 3 and JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure: All-Star Battle (and I also got into its spiritual predecessor, Heritage for the Future). But by and large my favorite fighting game of the decade and the one I’m actually pretty good at is Super Smash Bros. Ultimate, the most ridiculously ambitious crossover in video game history. The fact that the game is STILL getting more characters added is a testament of how insanely great the game is because instead of being mad that there’s so much DLC, people are going rabid waiting for news of more. It’s such an awesome, complete game out the door that the DLC feels earned rather than half a game being held hostage. Other devs, take note!

A lot of franchises put their best foot forward for sequels. God of War III was an awesomely bloody finale to the original journey of Kratos, with more epic bosses than ever; now he’s off fighting Norse gods, and I hear that game is even better! Portal 2 is just an absolute blast, and easily surpasses the first game on the merit of having Cave Johnson alone; the fact we get Wheatley and the malfunctioning personality cores honestly feels like overkill. Then we have BioShock… 2. While it’s certainly not as good as the first game, I think it was a lot of fun, and it got way too much flak.

 I think it definitely aged better than Infinite which, while still a good game in its own right (it’s hard to hate a game with a character as endearing as Elizabeth), definitely was not warranting the levels of acclaim it got with such a muddled narrative. “Overrated” and “overhyped” are not words I keep in my vocabulary and I certainly would not describe Infinite as such, but I do feel like people got swept up in the gorgeous visuals and the story bits and characters that are effective and so weren’t nearly as critical of its flaws. It’s still a good, fun game with an interesting world, but it pales in comparison to the other two BioShocks. I feel like The Last of Us is in a similar boat. That being said, I couldn’t tell you why; it has a great story, good characters, plenty of replayability, and fascinating enemy design. But despite all that, I appreciate this game more than love it. It’s the Citizen Kane of video game sin that regard at least.

I’d be remiss to not mention the big indie successes of the decade. Shovel Knight is easily one is the greatest platform era ever made, taking everything great about the platformers on the NES and SNES, removing the bullshit, and delivering numerous bonus campaigns with unique playstyles. Then there was Abobo’s Big Adventure, a marvelous mashup of all sorts of games starring the beloved Double Dragon mook as he goes on a bloody quest to save his son. It’s a blast and there is tons of variety but some sections are definitely as hair-pullingly difficult as the games that inspired them. And then there is Doki Doki Literature Club, the free visual novel that brutally subverts your expectations. Sadly, I do feel the game loses some impact on subsequent playthroughs, but it’s still a great, effective story that skillfully utilizes meta elements.

Still, the greatest indie success of them all is Toby Fox’s masterpiece, Undertale. Charming, funny, emotional, and populated by a cast of some of the most fun and lovable characters ever conceived, this game was an instant smash and is still talked about to this day. Sure, things like Sans have been memed to death, but it’s hard to not just love and cherish the beautiful world Toby Fox managed to create. This game may not be the greatest game of all time, but for what it is I wouldn’t hesitate to name it the game of the decade.

There was a lot of great art in the 2010s, and while I couldn’t get around to all of it, I’m so happy with what I got to experience. Here’s hoping that the 2020s can be just as amazing!

[dspre]

for the most recent ask meme, do you mind doing it for all of the ones you’ve spoken about? i would like to learn more about them all

Oof. I don’t mind; I love yelling about these nerds, but oof. That’ll be... Eth, Zab, Rome, Slava, Milagre, Iridian, Ellix, Sunny, and Milena (I was going to do Orlando and Anaheim as a bonus, but I couldn’t come up with good answers for them. Also not including Kaio, Aino, or Nikola, since I’ve mentioned their names but haven’t really said anything abt them, or Hazeldine, who I forgot to mention in the OCs I need to talk about more.)

Eth:

Strength: quick to adapt to new situations and circumstances

Weakness: doesn’t put work into interpersonal relationships, comes off as incredibly abrasive and hostile at first

Random fact: I have no idea where I came up with her name, but in-universe she tried to introduce herself as Beth around a new group of people and misspoke, then rolled with it until she decided she liked Eth better anyway (her full name is Elizabeth)

Zab:

Strength: cheerful even in the face of adversity, an unshakable optimist

Weakness: has a hard time seeing the big picture of anything, trying her best but mostly just doing what she’s told, fine in everyday interactions but has poor communication skills regarding deeper subjects

Random fact: gonna retcon previous statements here and say her hair is naturally ash brown, but she dyes it a wide variety of colors (although usually only one at a time)

Rome:

Strength: just keeps getting up and keeping on going no matter what

Weakness: very little sense of self except as a tool for the final battle

Random fact: [I can’t think of anything particularly interesting that isn’t spoilery, sorry]

Slava:

Strength: very good at noticing small details and figuring out how they play into larger events, also a hella good secret keeper

Weakness: (so many, honestly, but) has a well-defined in-group, and is often apathetic toward people who are not in it

Random fact: teaching Chronomancy in an effort to revive the practice and provide skilled observers and protectors of the main timeline, keeps in close touch with many of its previous students

Milagre:

Strength: friendly and sociable, a good listener, makes others feel included and appreciated

Weakness: she’s a huge doormat and hardly does anything of her own accord without outside influence

Random fact: has a pair of yellow boots that she is very proud of, they have black stripes down the outside and don’t match anything she owns but she wears them every day, they were one of her first quest rewards

Iridian:

Strength: has a strong sense of who she is and that she’s doing the right thing, makes decisions and stands by them including taking responsibility if they turn out badly

Weakness: tries too hard to project a tough persona, and ends up being seen as unapproachable and alienating people

Random fact: one of the only characters who has had the same name since I first came up with her, also is distantly related to Eth through time travel shenanigans that may or may not ever be brought up in-story

Ellix:

Strength: likes being helpful and can get things done quickly if they’re important or interesting, has a wide social circle and always “knows a guy” for any given situation

Weakness: so incredibly scatterbrained, has way too much on his plate at any given time and doesn’t know how to say no to people, terrible at budgeting and often finds he’s bought so many craft supplies he can’t afford things he needs

Random fact: has a huge collection of pimped-out canes in every imaginable color scheme, almost all with copious amounts of glitter

Sunny:

Strength: assumes the best of people unless proven otherwise, hardworking and doing their best to figure out how to be the hero, would never let a friend or ally get hurt or left behind

Weakness: has difficulty dealing with setbacks and uneven odds, hides the stress they’re under until they break down over it, has trouble asking for the emotional and sometimes material support they need because they think they should be able to do things all on their own

Random fact: their actual name is much longer and less pronounceable to English-speakers, but part of it roughly translates as “Sunny,” and they would rather be called that than have people mangle it all the time

Milena:

Strength: confronts her problems head-on as soon as they appear instead of waiting for them to get worse (learned this the hard way)

Weakness: has a hard time trusting anybody, sometimes lashes out at people who are trying to help her

Random fact: lives a double life as the wife of a noble and a secret member of the time police, wears colored contacts to hide her red eyes

OTPs:

Eth/Sabrina Greenstar (they date for a while, but eventually break up amicably and decide to just be friends, I ship it cause it’s cute and they’re just really nice together even though it doesn’t work out)

Eth/Milagre (never happens, but I like the idea)

Eth/Orlando (bad, would not approve of irl but I find the dynamic interesting, also is not explicitly romantic but is definitely more intimate than friendship)

Slava/Milena (also bad, also do not approve of, never happens, this is entirely one-sided on Slava’s part but it’s a viewpoint character and I get way too far into its head sometimes)

Sunny/Ben (I haven’t talked about Ben and would prefer not to field asks about her, but she’s the second of the three Designated Heroes)

BROTPs:

Eth & Milagre

Milagre & Hazeldine (cousins)

Ellix & Kaio

Kinisy & Medenda (I don’t even know who these people are, I just know they’re really good friends, PvP champions, and live on Unicorn Way)

I swear I have more but a lot of them are OC & CC and I don’t want to talk about those before I write the story bc people get weird abt it

Also I’m way more of a plot person than a character person so non-plot-relevant OCs mostly haven’t been developed yet, but I promise everyone has relationships with people other than the MC

NOTPs:

Eth/Iridian (see above where I said they’re related)

Iridian/anyone tbh (she’s aro)

Slava/Milena (bad, Milena would not be okay with this)

Slava/Cyrus Drake (I only mention this because I feel like it’s going to be misconstrued since I introduce them in the same scene, but anyway this is very very no for a whole hell of a lot of reasons)

[artemisegeria]

A Formula, A Phrase Remains (6/7)

Title: A Formula, A Phrase Remains (6/7)

Rating: T

Word count: 1393

Warnings: None

Summary: Endgame spoilers. Wanda Maximoff has known so much grief in her life that it moves with her like a second skin. But she is a survivor. Moving on is what she does. So she tries to put the latest tragedy behind her by putting all her focus into Avenging and forming a new family for herself.

Meanwhile, Princess Shuri is gathering her own team to bring back someone who was lost far too soon.

Available from the beginning here.

 A/N: This quick update is brought to you by my renewed anger over Endgame. This chapter is one of the reasons I used the “Shameless Wish Fulfillment” tag. I think we were robbed of a conversation like this in Endgame, so I made it myself, time travel mechanics aside. I wrote this with the assumption that Old Steve did not stick around in the main timeline after giving the shield to Sam.

There is a brief reference to Spider-Man: Far From Home spoilers, but this story is not compliant with the movie and ignores the timeline.

 Wanda sat in Central Park on a warm summer afternoon, as she was wont to do. Golden light flowed through the leafy shade like syrup. She let the peaceful atmosphere and warbling of nearby birds wash over her when her solitude was interrupted by an old man joining her on her bench.

It took her a moment to recognize who it was, but she could feel the familiar mind without using her powers. “I never expected to see you again, Steve.”

“I didn’t expect to come back, but I regret not speaking to you before I left.” He smiled at her, something tentative in the same boyishly charming expression he’d always had. “How are you, Wanda?”

“I am well, as much as can be expected.” It was not a lie, precisely. She had a home. She had those she considered friends and those she considered family. Very few people hated her, at least openly. She had a purpose. It was a good life, far better than most were granted. But she could not escape the holes in her soul that were the deaths of her parents and brother, her lost teammates, and Vision.

“I read the newspaper before I came to meet you. I read about how you and Bucky brought down that group of former SI employees that was trying to fool people into believing they were heroes. Good work.”

“Thank you.” She did smirk a bit at Steve’s obvious pride; she did consider it one of her finest achievements as an Avenger. She and Bucky had worked as a great sleuthing team and discovered the entire network on their own. Untold damage was saved when Wanda and Bucky stopped them before their plan could come to fruition.

A new thought came to her, and she crossed her arms, staring Steve down. “How did you even know to find me here?”

“Oh, a little birdie told me.” Wanda groaned at the old pun. That was one of the great joys of the new team, they had moved onto other teasing insults. Steve immediately turned more serious. “I’m glad you’re alright.”

“You too.” She was glad to see her old friend, even though she could feel resentment bubbling up within her. “Where are you going next?”

“I don’t know myself. I was more worried about finding you now that I built up the courage to face you.”

Wanda bit her lip. She never expected to be able to ask Steve about this. With Tony and Natasha gone, there was no one she felt she could talk to. She could interact with Bruce and Rhodey, but she couldn’t face them with this. Besides, it was all over, but Steve, who had fought almost as hard as she had, was now right here. She just had to ask him. “Why didn’t you even try?” Her voice broke into a sob and he handed her a cloth handkerchief.

Steve looked down at his hands before meeting her stare directly. He clearly knew exactly what she was talking about, judging by the pain in his eyes. “I don’t know what to tell you, Wanda. That’s part of the reason I avoided you after everyone came back. At first, we talked about trying to bring him back, but Bruce was shaken after his fight with the Hulk. Shuri was gone and we thought Tony was dead; he just didn’t think he could do it without them.” He paused at that, clearly lost in the memories of the aftermath of the first fight with Thanos.

Wanda wanted to urge him to continue. Now that the answers were so close, she needed to know. But she waited for him to go on. With a deep breath, he finally pressed on. “Then, we came back to New York. Everything was a mess and we were trying to put out as many fires as we could. When Tony came back a few weeks later, he wanted nothing to do with any of us, except Bruce. Eventually, Tony asked about Vision, and Bruce told him that the body was still in Wakanda. They argued a little bit about trying to bring him back, but Bruce wouldn’t do it. He retreated to his new lab and started working on his Hulk problem.”

Steve paused again. Wanda felt for what they had all suffered, she truly did, but something still didn’t sit right with her. “That explains why you didn’t try to bring him back immediately, but what about the next few years?” Steve looked away from her. She followed his gaze to where he was studying some children who were playing with a frisbee nearby.

“I was a coward. I couldn’t face the constant reminder of all the people we lost. I guess I was relieved when Tony and Bruce didn’t try to revive him. I left the Avengers to Nat and retreated into leading my group sessions. It just seemed more manageable trying to comfort people than trying to put the world back together. I failed, completely and utterly.”

Wanda felt torn between reassuring him that it must have been a difficult time and confirming that he was a terrible friend and a betrayal of his Captain America ideals. So she said nothing. The words stopped in her throat. She had worked so hard to move on over the last year and a half. When she finally accepted that Vision was not coming back ever, she renewed her efforts to move forward. Wanda built new relationships with her friends, did her best to mentor the younger would-be Avengers, and fought to rebuild the world. She did not think she would ever have room in her heart for romantic love again, but she had a rich life. Enduring this conversation revealed how fragile her healing was.

“I’m sorry, Wanda.”

Wanda still struggled to speak. She went through several quick meditation exercises that Stephen had shown while Steve sat silently by her side. After several minutes, she was finally able to get the words out. “I accept your apology for not talking to me, for just leaving to live your own alternate life, but I’m not the one you really owe an apology.”

Steve sighed. “I know.” He pulled out an envelope from his jacket pocket. “It doesn’t do much good now, but I wanted to go some way to make amends. This is a letter I wrote to Vision.” She accepted it with shaking hands.

“I’ll send it on to Shuri.” She considered that this would give her an excuse to travel to Wakanda to see Vision’s memorial. However, her careful façade of recovery was already compromised. She couldn’t think of going to see his grave right now. She had attempted to make her peace with him when she had visited Wakanda soon after she returned. She knew revisiting that wound would only make it bleed anew.

“Thank you.” They fell into a brief, contemplative silence until Steve cleared his throat. “Would it be alright if I stayed for dinner?”

Wanda brought out her most polite smile that Natasha had taught her for dealing with the press. “Of course.” She knew the others would want to see him. She tamped down her lingering negative feelings in the name of harmony.

When they arrived back at the mansion, Bucky hugged Steve and Carol clapped him on the shoulder. Dinner was spent with everyone talking over each other to explain their latest exploits. Bucky teased Steve about missing modern conveniences all those years. Carol compared basic training stories with him. Sam joked that Steve should take Bucky off his hands. Wanda excused herself as soon as she was able. Fortunately, they all let her go without complaint or question.

She spent the rest of the evening wrapped in a blanket in her room, despite the muggy late summer air. She listened to Vision’s favorite soft jazz to drown out the laughter from downstairs. Wanda decided that if she was going to wallow, which she had not allowed herself to do in months, she might as well do it properly. She pulled out a book that Vision had recommended to her from her drawer and enveloped herself in his sweater, one of his few pieces of actual clothing that she had stolen from him during one of their visits.

She let the tears pour down her face.

 A/N2: Ah, catharsis! I don’t hold it against the team for not mentioning Vision. I hold it against the writers who ignored the actions the team likely would have at least attempted based on their attitudes in IW and earlier movies, but damn it, everyone will acknowledge how they failed Vision in my stories.

This also turned a little angstier than I intended, but Wanda is going through a tough time.

Only one chapter left in the first part! I’m excited to move on to the next part of the story.  

[wits-writing]

Earth’s Mightiest Retrospective Ep 18: “The Kang Dynasty”

(Directed by Sebastian Montes, Written by Brian Reed, Original Airdate: January 23, 2011)

The structure of the three episodes that make up the Kang storyline works well in favor of pacing the story out while leaving each piece as its own distinct unit of storytelling. “The Man Who Stole Tomorrow” focused on Kang’s ambush of the Avengers, announcing his intentions and them all fighting against him. “Come the Conqueror” showed the heroes dealing with the scope of what Kang can bring against the Earth with the invasion. Now, “The Kang Dynasty”, with Kang’s conquest nearly complete, has them returning the favor for Kang’s actions in the first part and taking the fight to his personal ship, the Damocles, in orbit above Earth.

We’re shown the team at the start of the episode getting ready to launch into space, wearing some spiffy space armor Tony’s provided them. All the suits have a uniform red/white color scheme (not unlike the suits we recently saw in the latest Avengers Endgame trailer) but are kept custom, so we know who’s who at a glance, though Hulk only gets a breathing apparatus. They prepare to launch, bringing along a squad of Ultrons to assist, as Kang aims his main cannon at them from space. The trip into space proves to be a battle of attrition for the Avengers as each of them takes on a different role so they can make it to the Damocles. The first move in this fight manages to take something away from both sides, as Thor uses all his might to deflect the blast from Kang’s cannon back at the ship. The damage done by Thor’s efforts makes sure Kang won’t be able to use the weapon again but knocks the Thunderer out for the rest of the episode.

The rest of the trip into space features a strategic use of the Avengers individual skills against the drones Kang sends to stop them. Everyone’s roles follow logically from their skills and characterization; Captain America pilots the Quinjet, Hawkeye operated the turrets and meanwhile Iron Man and Wasp run interference outside the ship with their flight and blasts, since Tony built Wasps suit to let her use her energy stingers at full size. When the Quinjet gets closer to the Damocles, Hulk makes their final move by smashing a hole in Kang’s flagship for them to enter through. Before who’s left can figure out how to navigate to the center of the ship and send it away from the present, they get ambushed by Kang’s elite guards.

That fight is entertaining, especially how Hawkeye manages to overcome their time-stopping ability. However, it does end up feeling a bit like the show padding for time between the initial infiltration of Kang’s ship and the final showdown with the Conqueror himself. While the rest of the team go through their clash with the guards, Iron Man and Wasp try to find their own way into the ship. Tony tries to figure out some technical solution by navigating through Kang’s technology. Wasp ultimately gets them in by tricking one of Kang’s drone to crash and create a hole they can enter through. A nice example of Janet’s outside the box thinking. Tony and Janet split up after that to each find their own path to the ship’s core. Janet ends up running into one of the reason’s Kang felt such urgency to conquer the past in order to preserve his future, his wife.

Attentive readers following these recaps will notice I haven’t mentioned Kang’s wife, Princess Ravonna, at all in my coverage of this multiparter so far. She’s presented as much like an afterthought here as I thought she would be when this plot point was first introduced in “Meet Captain America.” There have been occasional shots of Kang looking at his nearly time-lost wife at most in the other two episodes. There’s nothing here even close to comparable to something like Mister Freeze in Batman: The Animated Series talking about how he longs to be able to revive his own love. Ravonna ends up not only as a prop-character, but a mostly superfluous one at that. It’s a weird weakness for this story arc to have, since it otherwise works well across the three episodes its given. I said it before and it bears repeating, Kang’s willingness to conquer the past to preserve his rule in the future is compelling enough without throwing a woman in the refrigerator on top of that.

Outside of that, the final confrontation of Iron Man and Captain America versus Kang works incredibly. The Futurist and the Man Out of Time fighting a self-declared “Master of Time” makes an appropriate climax for where Tony and Steve began this three-parter. It helps that a good portion of this fight is close quarters, since Kang pulls out twin swords to help him. Iron Man reveals he’s been paying close attention to Kang’s tech over these events and pulls out the counter measures that let them clear the way for their secret weapon to stop the Conqueror in his tracks, Ultron. Tony tells Ultron to use its operating system to decode the time travel controls of the Damocles. Before Kang is completely defeated and Ultron completes its task, Wasp comes in with some of Kang’s servants to give them the rundown on the situation with Ravonna. Specifically, that she’ll die if the ship does any more time jumps. The Avengers rule to strand Kang and the Damocles in the present instead.

Despite concluding by calling back to the biggest weakness in its story, the three-episode Kang storyline of Avengers: Earth’s Mightiest Heroes works like gangbusters. I’ve noted the points where it falls into a bit of contrivance, but they’re ultimately minor quibbles. It’s a story exemplary of the EMH how I remembered it before doing these retrospectives. It closes out by establishing a few more details that will work their way into stories for the future. One of which is unfortunately not Reed Richards and Hank studying Ravonna to see if they can revive her. However, that scene ends on an ominous shot of the last remaining Ultron, now given the knowledge of violence, with its eyes still glowing red and earlier in the episode had its voice sounding deeper than before. Thor wakes up in a hospital bed with Jane Foster looking over him. We finally close on Tony and Steve discussing how they’ve managed to learn from each other over this experience and feel like they can handle any oncoming threat. Only for Kang to assure them the worst is yet to come.

Next time, an episode that nearly made me reconsider what order I needed to do this retrospective.

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