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speedybeta · 3 months

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Agent00 x reader — insomnia

MASTERLIST , REQUEST

Insomnia — not being able to sleep caused by a specific reason.

warnings — FLUFF! not proof read! If mistakes, just point it out in the comments or something. but also I'm not sure who the hell stays at the amp house besides the actual members, so I made some things up if it's not accurate just please pretend it is. Not long or not that short, just a little fic. Also, the way I described his room kinda made 0 sense u have to watch his room tour to actually understand what I meant but enjoy this little fic

You, being in amp, were basically like a little sister to the others. Well, besides agent. Despite your playful banter and bickering in the gaming streams, you and Agent had always been just friends. But the viewers, ever-attuned to any hint of romantic chemistry, couldn't help but point out the palpable tension that sparked whenever you and Agent were together on camera. Agent's knack for delivering insults always seemed to be directed at you, leaving the audience divided between enjoying your reactions and secretly shipping the two of you together.

Tonight, the amp house was eerily silent. Kai was away in Taiwan for Ray's graduation, leaving the house blissfully without his usual boisterous presence. Duke was nowhere to be found, preferring to stream in the comfort of his separate house these days. Davis was rarely around, spending most of his time at his girlfriend's place. Even Chris, who normally slept at the amp house, was absent. It was just you and Agent the only ones in the house, but it didn't really mean anything to either of you.

—

At 1 am, Agent had finally finished a six-hour stream. Exhaustion and fatigue weighed heavily on his frame as he gently removed his headset, then his hat, shaking his signature dreads. His gaze lingered on the now darkened monitors, a sense of weariness etched across his face. With a weary sigh, he reached forward and began shutting everything off, the room plunging into a temporary state of silence.

Suddenly, his door opened, agent stood up from his chair, not looking towards his door, obviously knowing it was you. But then felt a wave of confusion hit. It was 1 am, why the hell would you be in his room late at night? He heard your footsteps approaching him, but didn't turn around yet. He couldn't help but let out a small sigh and an eye roll, assuming your intentions were to bother him.

"What the hell are you doing in here?" he asked a bit bluntly, his tiredness was noticeable in his tone of voice. He waited for a response, still not turning to look at you. His gaze lingered on the monitors in front of him, making sure everything was off before he called it a night.

"I can't sleep." the gentle tone of your voice made agent turn around to finally face you, his expression softened upon seeing you look at him with those tired eyes. He was a bit surprised. Hearing your soft, quiet voice was unusual and even surprising. Usually, you don't speak in such a soft tone, but the tiredness in your voice made him realize that you were extremely sleep deprived.

"Damn...Are you okay? You look tired as hell." he couldn't help but feel a wave of concern at the thought of you not getting a healthy amount of rest.

"hmhm" hearing your soft reply only made him feel more concerned. He stared at you from his desk, looking at you with a gentle gaze. "um" he heard you pause, his gaze lingering on your tired figure. "Can I sleep in here with you?"

Upon hearing you ask that, his expression changed to a surprised look. He was shocked to hear you say that. sleep in his room? with him? he felt flustered. his heart skipped a beat, looking at your tired figure. he couldn't say no. especially if you looked exhausted. he sighed, nodding his head as he looked at you.

"Yeah- you can sleep in here with me for tonight." he responded back to your question, before turning back to his monitors, watching as they finished shutting down. He glanced back at you, walking to his door that led to his other rooms.

"come on" He walked inside the other room, which was connected to his gaming room. His bathroom was dimly lit, and his shower was large and spacious. He turned to look at you, noticing how tired you looked and how you were rubbing your eyes. The corner of his lips turned into a soft grin, seeing how adorable you looked tired.

He led you to his main room, which was connected to his bathroom. He guided you into the bedroom, walking towards his bed that could fit two people. he laid down on his bed, getting comfortable. The room was average size, a red light illuminating the room.

"you can lay down" he mumbled, watching you close his door. He acknowledged how sleepy you were, and found it adorable. His heart warmed at the precious sight of you, all tired and drained.

He smiled gently at you, his eyes looking at your tired body. He saw you come onto the bed, laying down next to him. he was blushing a bit, seeing how cute you looked. it was unusual for him to think about how you look since he usually makes fun of you. He isn't used to seeing you like this.

He then placed his bonnet on, laying down properly on his comfortable bed. He observed you silently staring at his ceiling, noticing that you seemed to be more comfortable now that you weren't alone anymore. He glanced at your tired figure, a small smile appeared on his lips.

He gazes at your features, taking in how pretty you looked laying next to him. He then found himself wondering what was making you so sleep deprived. His eyes scanned your face, and then spoke softly.

"did something happen? Or why can't you sleep?" he pondered, looking at you with a soft and gentle look, staring down at your lips, watching them as you opened them to speak.

"I feel lonely- I just can't sleep with how lonely my room felt" he turned his head to look directly into your eyes now that you stopped looking at the ceiling, holding eye-contact with you. a pang of sympathy hit him when you said you felt lonely. he quietly listened to you closely, noticing your expression softening as you spoke. a silent feeling of pity arose in him as he looked at you, hearing you saying you were lonely

"you're lonely huh?" He said in a soft whisper as he looked at you, a hint of tiredness in his voice, he continued to gaze into your eyes silently, his eyes slowly roaming over your face, noticing how close you two were. he didn’t say anything for a moment, his eyes shifting back down to your lips before looking back into your eyes again. he was feeling a weird feeling in his stomach at the moment as he looked at you, his tired mind a bit overwhelmed by your presence and how adorable and cute you looked at the moment. he slowly reached up and gently pushed some hair behind your ear.

"You should’ve said so…" he muttered quietly, continuing to look into your eyes, feeling a strange and confusing feeling of attraction and desire for you. despite the constant bickering and insults that the two of you give to each other, he can’t deny the fact that you are extremely attractive. he couldn’t deny that he thought you were cute and wanted you bad. he slowly moved his hand and gently touched your cheek, his thumb gently rubbing against your skin.

Agent could see your eyes glance down at his hand resting on your cheek, before looking back into his eyes. the feeling of desire continued to grow in him, making it harder for him to keep his composure and control his thoughts. he swallowed quietly, his voice soft and gentle as he spoke to you "So lonely you had to crawl into my bed, huh?" he joked in a whisper, his soft and gentle touch still on your cheek.

Agent noticed a small grin forming on the corner of your lips, and it only made his heart flutter a bit as he looked at you. he couldn’t help but notice the tired and sleepy expression on your face. he couldn’t deny that you looked adorable at the moment. he slowly leaned in a bit closer and spoke in a even more quieter voice. "Looks like you’re about to fall asleep…"

His gaze fixed at you while you slowly blinked at him, too exhausted to respond. he could tell that you were tired and about to fall asleep at any second by the way you started slowly blinking, your tiredness taking over your entire body. seeing you looking tired made him feel a rush of emotions, from wanting to hold you in his arms to wanting to just keep watching you. he softly chuckled at your lack of response and softly spoke again "Goddamn, you look cute when you’re sleepy."

He couldn’t take his eyes off of you, as he looked at you while you slowly grew more sleepy. the thought of holding your body against his own made him want to hold you close. the idea of just slowly running his fingers through your hair as you fall asleep was running through his mind. he slowly moved his hand from your cheek and gently rested it on your waist as he gently pulled you towards him, wanting you closer to him

He slowly pulled you closer to him, your body now closer to his, as he wrapped his arms around your waist. he could barely keep his composure and control his thoughts, the idea of holding you so close to his body made him feel some type of way. he felt the intense desire to kiss you but held it back, he didn’t want to give in to his own wants yet. he looked at you for a moment, his eyes still lingering all over your sleepy face.

He held you close to him, feeling your body against his, the heat and warmth from your body feeling good against him. he had to hold back all the thoughts in his mind of wanting to kiss you and hold you even closer, but he controlled himself for the time being. he gently nuzzled his face against the top of your head, softly closing his eyes and taking in the feel of your body against him. your sleepy expression and cute body made him want you even more

He let out a soft content sigh as he nuzzled his face against the top of your head, his hands slowly rubbing your side gently. he continued holding you close to him, your body pressed against his chest. he slowly closed his eyes again as he spoke in a soft and quiet voice. "You better not drool all over me while you sleep." he joked in a hushed whisper, feeling the tiredness taking over his mind.

"I don't drool." he softly smiled at your response, your tired tone and sleepy expression were still cute to him. he slowly opened his eyes again as he looked down at you, listening to your mumbled reply, quietly scoffing at it "Oh, yeah? You’re lying. You definitely Drool." he said in a hushed tone, poking your side gently, a teasing tone in his voice, his body still holding you close against him

He felt his heart flutter again as you opened your eyes and looked up at him, feeling you cuddling against him and nuzzling your face into his chest. he couldn’t resisting softly chuckling at how cute and adorable you looked at the moment. he wrapped my arms even tighter around your waist, pulling you closer to him and holding you tightly "hm, going quiet now, huh?" he said quietly, his hand rubbing your back softly.

He heard you only humming in response, nuzzling your face into his chest and closing your eyes. seeing you close your eyes and nuzzle into his chest made him smile again to himself. he continued to rub your back gently, his hand moving in soft and slow circles. he could tell you were falling asleep as he held you in his arms, a soothing feeling of comfort washing over him. he closed his eyes for a moment and rested his head on top of yours, breathing in the scent of your hair and listening to your gentle breathing

He held you close as he felt you slowly falling asleep in his arms, your body relaxing, your breathing getting slower and softer, the way you nuzzled your face into his chest making his heart flutter again. he slowly exhaled and spoke in a quiet, whispery tone again, his hand still rubbing your back in a gentle and soothing motion "Just fall asleep already." he whispered, a hint of affection in his voice as he looked at you, admiring your sleepy expression and adorable tired body against his

He continued to watch over you as you slowly fell asleep in his arms, his hand still rubbing your back in a gentle and soothing motion. he could see how comfortable and relaxed you looked, your eyes slowly closing and your breathing slowing down. his heart swelled with affection and a sense of protectiveness as he held you in his arms, feeling your body relaxing as you drifted off into a deep and gentle sleep. "Sleep babygirl…" he whispered softly, continuing to hold you, feeling your body slowly relax and ease into a deep sleep. he gently shifted a bit, pulling you even closer to his body, wanting to keep you as close as possible while you sleep. as he held you, he noticed how cute and adorable you looked when you slept, your face so relaxed and peaceful. he slowly ran his fingers through your hair softly, the affectionate and protective feeling in his heart growing stronger as he watched over you while you slept.

He stayed there, holding you close to his body, your body pressed up against his as you slept peacefully. he softly sighed to himself in content, his eyes roaming over your face as you slept. he continued gently rubbing your back with one hand, the other hand softly continuing to play with your hair. he couldn’t help but marvel at how adorable and beautiful you looked while you slept, his heart feeling both affection and protectiveness towards you

He continued watching you sleep, a wave of tiredness washing over him. he was fighting the urge to fall asleep, he wanted to stay awake and keep his arms around you, continuing to gently rub your back. but the sound of your gentle breathing and the soothing feeling of holding you in his arms were slowly coaxing him to sleep. he gently sighed, his eyes closing for a moment as he tried to resist the sleepiness but he knew it was futile.

The quiet room was illuminated by the soft glow of the moon, the silver moonlight streaming through the glass of the sliding door and creating a gentle and soothing ambience. the two of you were cuddled up against each other, your bodies close together and his arms still holding you securely against him. his chest rose and fell gently as he slept, his breaths soft and steady. the room was still and peaceful, the only sound being the sound of your soft breathing and the occasional sounds of the night outside.

Your body was catching up on the sleep you missed out on. This brought you a sense of calm and contentment that you rarely felt. neither of you or agent had expected to end up like this, cuddled together in his bed, the warmth of agents body against yours feeling like a cure for both your sleepless nights. Now you know exactly who to go to for comfort whenever you struggled to sleep.

#agent00 #agent amp #fluff #insomia #twitch streamer #twitch #youtuber #Callmeagentzero #callmeagent #amp #anymeanspossible #agent 00x #agentdoublezero

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fyeahcindie · 2 years

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This has lots of good info, please check it out! =D

Josh Edbrooke interviews 落日飛車 Sunset Rollercoaster drummer Lo Zun-Long 羅尊龍 (尊龍 Zunlong IG) for Taiwan Beats.

Australian readers out there? Sunset Rollercoaster are playing 3 shows in December. Brisbane, Sydney and Melbourne.

3 California shows still have tix, but everything else is sold out on the US/Canada tour.

By the way, Josh is also a drummer, playing with the band Transition前進樂團

#落日飛車 Sunset Rollercoaster #Josh Edbrooke #Lo Zun-Long 羅尊龍 #taiwan beats #interview #taiwan

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absolutebl · 2 months

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Top 10 Most Underrated BLs of the last 3 years

(mid year 2021 - end 2023)

This list will not include BLs that ended their run in 2024. I need some distance to know if something is actually underrated (We Are maybe?) or justifiably ignored.

1 I Cannot Reach You AKA Kimi ni wa Todokanai (Japan 2023 Netflix?)

This classic friends-to-lovers BL is everything Japan does best. Angsty. Emo. Aching. Driven by real thirst. Yamato is deeply in love with his childhood bestie, Kakeru, and has been for ages, increasingly unable to hide his ungainly damaging high school need. He wants Kakeru in every way possible and it oozes off of the screen. Kakeru is silly and a little simple, but not frenetic or overly camp about it. He is earnest, and genuinely wants to keep Yamato in his life, which means giving a romance (and gayness) a fair chance. We watch him realize his affection and what form it can take in a truly authentic way. This show was impossibly kind to both of its lead characters and I felt almost honored that I got to watch something so lovely and rare play out on my screen. Full review.

2 My Ride (Thai 2022 Gaga)

Thai BL grew up with this pulp (the first ever pulp to make my end of year top 10). It’s a truly lovely and special little show featuring the extremely rare pairing of sunshine/sunshine (AKA a cinnamon roll couple) plus mature explorations of relationships using one of the softest, sweetest, and most innocent friends to lovers vehicles. Kindly, overworked doctor meets broken-hearted motorcycle taxi rider in an “other side of the tracks” slow burn romance. The support cast is excellent, making for great friendship groups and family dynamics. With honest queer rep that adds to, but doesn’t impede, the story, and genuine conversation about the nature of class, wealth, and classism, not to mention communication, honesty, and respect for boundaries, you can’t go wrong with this show. In other news, I am a sucker for a single dimple. Full review.

3 Our Dining Table AKA Bokura no Shokutaku (Japan 2023 Gaga)

A lonely salaryman (+ talented cook) gets accidentally adopted by a college kid (and his little brother). I was always gonna love this show if they stuck to the original yaoi (which is very dear to my heart). And they did! Paralleling it almost exactly. It’s a quiet & cozy little parable of found family alleviating loneliness. Possibly too slow for some but definitely high up there for me as the best of what Japan can do with softness (like Restart After Come Back Home). It’s only flaw (if I dare say such a thing) is that it is not really “romantic.” Lovely & sweet but the romance beats are being used to build a family relationship, not just couple intimacy, but that's OK with me. This is a very safe show for anyone to watch.

4 About Youth (Taiwan 2022 Gaga)

A truly lovely little coming of age high school BL with a classic YA low drama but high angst and earnest depth. I didn’t even mind the singing, and that’s saying a lot. A weak seme/uke dynamic but tons of BL tropes (both rare in a high school setting but common for Taiwan) makes this one feel both sweet and colored by real world authenticity and grit. Full review.

5 Step By Step (Thai 2023 Gaga)

This was Thailand’s answer to The New Employee, and everything I loved about that show I loved about this one. This office romance between a stern boss and sweet subordinate felt more authentic to cubical work than previous Thai BLs of this ilk. That authenticity added tension to the narrative and its characters development (how novel). I also really enjoyed the charming side characters and the brothers' relationship to each other (although I could have done without that brother's side BL). Full review.

6 DNA Says Love You (Taiwan 2022 Gaga)

DNA deserves extra marks for an upbeat approach to a queer story arc that other shows have systemically mishandled with sadness (in the guise of realism). There is a twist, which I found predictable, but knowing what would happen didn't spoil this show. The leads are luminous and engaging, and it’s full of queer found family representation and an unexpected amount of domesticity, plus it’s Taiwan, so the kisses are great. The first few eps are rough going but have patience, it's worth it I promise! The second half is really special and life/love affirming - and the end is big-grin charming. Full review.

7 Unintentional Love Story (Korea 2023 iQIYI)

Of all the BLs on this list, this is probubly the MOST underrated. OMG the plot! Uke forced into a totally understandable betrayal, falling in love despite himself, put into a corner he can't get out of, the AGONY, the PAIN in those gorgeous eyes. Gah. Okay, so: A boy loses his job due to trumped-up corruption charges accidentally discovers his ex-boss's favorite artist, now a recluse. Evil manager offers him his job back, if he can convince the artist to rejoin society. Instead, they fall in love. I found the artist a bit stiff and reserved but Gongchan (maknae of B1A4) is a fucking GIFT - he carried this show (which I do not expect from the idol element). He was luminous with extraordinarily expressive eyes, just drown in the emoting abyss. The external conflict, social tension and pressure is complex and beautifully executed, plus Korea gave us legit side dishes (NOT a love triangle, hally-fucking-luya). Full review.

8 Dear Doctor I'm Coming for Your Soul (Thai 2022 iQIYI)

This is a romance between a doctor trying to save his patients and a reaper who is both his enemy and (eventual) lover (basically the genius premise of a gay Doom at Your Service). High concept looks good on you, Thailand. It’s lovely to see KarnNat back on screen together and they are still great, and Karn is just as painfully beautiful as ever. I enjoyed this one more than its ending deserved, and the best I can say is that it’s not strictly HEA but if you’re okay with Life: Love on the Line, you’ll be okay with this BL. It’s set up well, there’s no surprise unpleasantness like HIStory 3: The BL that shall not be named. Full review.

9 Destiny Seeker (Thai 2023 WeTV)

A darn near perfect pulp featuring 3 likable grumpy/sunshine pairings with uncomplicated iterations of enemies to lovers. At least one half of each does a decent amount of pining and there’s good chemistry, classic tropes, and excellent communication rep. It’s fun and full of linguistic jokes. Sublimely cheesy but a good rainy day offering with tons of rewatch potential. (Also WAR PEANUTS!) Full review.

10 Make a Wish (Thai 2023 grey)

A doctor who can see the dead strikes a bargain with a wish-granting irreverent tree angel - naturally they fall in love (from Sammon: Manner of Death & Triage). Stars Fluke Natouch opposite not Ohm, but who cares because Fluke has chemistry with everybody. Once again the Thai afterlife is incredibly bureaucratic but I enjoyed the premise and the unfolding of the story (it’s not predictable but still satisfying and with nice little twist). I like that the doctor is just gay AF - fag hag bestie and made of swagger. The cast is excellent but the comedic stylings are a bit overblown and tonally off. It has sad parts and did make me cry but is ultimately happy with a great sex scene, good smiley kisses, and all the agency.

10 others I rarely see anyone talk about:

Triage - Many would put this at the top of the list, but I don't find it very rewatchable and that weighs a lot in my assessments. Still it is GOOD and very underrated. BL does Groundhog Day featuring a doctor stuck in a time loop who must save a poor little rich boy from death by seducing the stuffing out of him, then PLOT TWIST, poor little rich boy must do the same for doctor! Unfortunately… stuffing keeps leaking. I thought the plot was engaging if a little redundant and occasionally exhausting. The pairs were all well done, low heat but with decent chemistry and the support characters were likable (or unlikeable, as required). My reason it's not in the top 10? If anything, the romance arc detracted and distracted from the main plot, but that doesn't stop this from being a genuinely good show it's just time loop is not a trope I personally enjoy. Review here.

See You After Quarantine? - This under appreciated gem is Taiwan’s answer to Gameboys and is just as charmg and adorable yet still as quintessentially Taiwanese as one might hope. It features a Japanese love interest and the cutest most confused disaster gay. Slow burn because the two have almost no actual screen time together and yet manage some truly amazing chemistry. Honestly how does Taiwan do it?

The Tasty Florida - I don't know, maybe it's Speed nostalgia, but I love this one, classic Korean BL with all those strengths and flaws... but The Prettiest.

You Make Me Dance - it's Korea but somehow they got this one, maybe by featuring mature characters and a real world crisis? Also they both ve hot.

Blueming - at the time it got a lot of attention but it seems to have faded into obscurity under the shod of The 8th Sense and Love of Love's Sack. This was a precurser to both and well worth a watch if you like it when Korea gets a little gritty.

Love Stage!! (Thai version) - I liked this IP alerady more than most. But this is the best of the 4 adaptations, and the first full Thai version of Japanese IP. It's both charming and notable in the industry. Hard to find and that's why it gets so little creddit but I think it's well worth the effort to track down.

Oh! Boarding House - I think most who watched this din't jive with it because it's an ensamble piece witha wicked love traingle. But I really enjoyed it. It felt like the move Kdrama BL that Korea has given us and I like me some Kdramas.

What Zabb Man! - one of the better BLs to come out of Star Hunter in the last few years. I like this pair a lot more than most, and the sides are wicked great. This is probably one of my favorite food themed BLs, actually.

2 Moons The Ambassador - possibly the lowest scoring BL to appear on this list but I just really like the leads. Nothing else is good, but they are kinda awkwardly fantastic. I also like how gay af the seme is.

Stay By My Side - This show was an interesting take on the "ghost boyfriend" trope. About a boy who is tormented by hearing the dead, except when he is around one other boy - desperation+proximity = love. Despite a strong initial premise it ended up mostly being enjoyable for sappy domesticity but nothing more. Still, I always give extra credit for the diabetes-inducing sugar content and rewatch capacity.

Requested by the lovely @l1xyz

FYI: I judge “underrated” on the strength of what I see people talk about (or more precisely not talk about) on social media, MDL reviews, and YouTube watch numbers (when available, as compared to comparable shows from the same country).

Because of this, statistically, there will always be quite a few BLs that are difficult to get hold of.

Here's my pulls of the Top Underrated BLs prior to 2021. Considering the amount of content generated over the last few years, the pool to draw from is likely about the same.

My Top 10 Most Underrated BLs prior to 2021

Seven Days

Restart after Come Back Home

Wish You

Nobleman Ryu’s Wedding

He’s Coming to Me

Oxygen

My Day

Most Peaceful Place

HIStory 2: Right or Wrong

HIStory: Obsessed

I'd throw Great Men Academy in there, but I always dither over whether it actually is a BL.

#my top most underrated BLs #best BLs no one talks about #I Cannot Reach You #Kimi ni wa Todokanai #Japanese BL #My Ride the series #Thai BL #Our Dining Table #Bokura no Shokutaku #About Youth the series #Taiwanese BL #Step by Step the series #NA Says Love You #Unintentional Love Story #Korean BL #Dear Doctor I'm Coming for Your Soul #Destiny Seeker #Make a Wish the series #Triage the series

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mitskicain · 1 month

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navi | m.list

. ⁺ . ✦ ‘sayang’ is a double-edged sword — kuroo x reader

synopsis: based on the headcanon of a half-Indonesian kuroo. in which he learns that the language is full of contradictions.

content warnings: ANGST, mentions of bullying, homesickness

word count: 3.5k

· · ─────── ·{ ✐ᝰ.ᐟ}· ─────── · ·

Sayang. A two syllable word that was the unofficial translation of love in the Indonesian language. Technically love was ‘cinta’, but you didn’t like how it felt in your mouth—bulky and awkward—too big for anything. You liked the way ‘sayang’ sounded better, the way it rolled off the tongue so easily—fleeting, almost carelessly. Sayang.

Aku sayang kamu. I love you.

Your mother called you sayang. You recalled running up to her after school, her arms outstretched and wide open, waiting to wrap around you. The sweet scent of her skin that was like honeysuckle and summer, the warmth of her smile—beaming at you from the driver’s seat as you babbled about your day. She would call you that term of endearment whenever she had the chance.

Sayang, come down for dinner. Sayang, it’s time to wake up. Sayang, have fun at school!

Indonesian was your mother tongue. The first language you had learned how to speak. In a way, your entire childhood was defined by it. There were things in your everyday vocabulary that didn’t make sense, or were different when translated. In that way, you always felt like there was something missing when you spoke English or Japanese. When you left Jakarta during the 1998 riots, your mother, alongside a handful of other families, managed to escape from the fiery wrath of the protestors, sought asylum from any other country that was willing to take you. Some of your friends moved to Singapore, others, Malaysia, or Taiwan—for you it was Japan, a country that once had colonized yours but was now your saving grace. With only two suitcases to your name and your mother’s limited Japanese learnt during her high-school years, the two of you tried to make home in the foreign country. You were starting all over again. Language. School. Friends. It would prove to be difficult.

Japanese kids were mean. Not beating-you-up kind of mean, but snickering-behind-your-back mean. Back home, they would say things to your face, pick fights and shouting matches with you, but here, they talked about you in hushed whispers and lingering gazes. It was in the sharpie doodles on your school shoes and the scattered laughter that echoed whenever you slipped up when you read aloud for the class. You were still bad at Japanese—the language a tangle of syllables in your mouth. Your mother told you that it was because your tongue was just used to speaking Indonesian. You thought it was because Japan was foreign to you, in the bad way. In the way that your body silently rebelled against it by fixing your jaw in ways so you couldn’t say things right—so that years later, even after you became fluent, the trace of your mother tongue still lingered.

That was the first thing that Kuroo Tetsuro pointed out. You talk funny, were his first words to you—finger pointed straight between your eyes. A rage bubbled in your chest at the mention of it. It was something that you were insecure about, something you felt the need to hide. You didn’t even know you were muttering to yourself when you played in the playground’s sandbox until he pointed it out to you, and you hated that, and you made sure to let him know how much you did—through a mash of fists and bruises and a black eye (his, not yours).

Your mother made you apologize—the Japanese way—kneeling, on the floor. You were red hot and flushed, humiliated for having done so. Not for beating up the kid but rather for having been caught, and having to apologize. Why should you? He started it. He was making fun of you. “You talk funny,” psh, he looked funny. His sharp cat-like eyes and almost permanent bed head—how could his parents let him out of the house looking like that? Someone might mistake him for a stray.

That apology was how you found out Kuroo was a little bit like you—half-Indonesian, from his mothers side. The tiny Indonesian population in Japan meant that whoever was from the motherland clung together like thieves at sea. Maybe it was because of familiarity, maybe because of homesickness. In a way, all they had left of their home country was each other, speaking the same language, knowing the same songs, the same streets—sometimes even the same people. For them, this was the closest thing to coming home. This was how you eventually became friends with Kuroo, after years and years of living down the street and your mother inviting him over and attending the same school and making the two of you befriend the other.

It was rough at first. You refused to speak Japanese around him, fearing the same insult would come and jab at you when you would. Despite his mother’s nationality, he was never able to understand or speak the language that you did—part of himself almost denying that part of him after his mother left. Maybe that was his way of getting revenge, refusing to acknowledge his mother’s culture, her homeland.

The two of you would pass the time playing congklak, the Indonesian version of the mancala. You practiced counting this way, dropping the shells in each divot one by one—starting again if there were any remaining. He babbled on about TV shows he watched, or mangas he read, trying to make a point about how Japanese he was, how un-Indonesian, and by extension, how unlike his mother. Sometimes you would watch Ikkyu-san together. Sometimes he would flip through the comics you had brought over—Mahabhrata and Gundala and Bobo. You remember the look on his face as he traced over the pages, his nose scrunched in confusion.

“It’s too confusing, all these words look foreign to me,” he would say, putting them back on the shelf.

“So what?” You shot back, “I had to do the same thing when I came here. Kanji still looks like scribbles to me.”

There was no mashing of fists or sound of crying this time, just a mutual understanding of the others’ struggle. You watched him swallow the lump in his throat and pick up the book again, finger tracing the sentences, sounding out the words—like a child learning how to read for the first time. You sighed, defeated, and sat down next to him, trying to teach him. He was a persistent child, often needing to get his way regardless of whatever circumstances but here he was—docile, obedient. Something between the two of you shifted.

Kuroo began to grow out of his shell in middle school; making new friends on the volleyball team and tagging along during their after-practice escapades, oftentimes raiding the local convenience store for all the goodies. Sometimes you would come with, slipping into the background of conversations and keeping to yourself. You still didn’t like talking in front of anyone—so you kept your lips pressed together and our gaze downcast, a faraway look in your eyes. Of course, this caught the attention of some of his teammates.

“Is she mute?” One of them had asked, hands shoved in his pockets, walking a few steps ahead of you. Despite you hanging back, you could still hear him, but then again, it wasn’t like he made any attempt to speak quietly either. Or maybe he thought that you were also deaf.

“Dude,” he sounds, offended for you, “she’s right here.”

“So? It’s not like she ever says anything. It’s like she’s deaf, or mute—or both.”

Kuroo frowns at this statement. At home, he sits across from you, pencil tapping against the pages of his ignored math homework. You look up at him with your eyebrow cocked, as if, beckoning for him to spit it out already.

“Would it kill you to make some friends?” He asks, words sharp and unforgiving. Your shoulders slump at the question, and you give him a deadpan look before returning your attention to your assignment, already miles ahead of him.

“I don’t need them,” you mumble, “too much of a hassle.”

“How do you survive without them? Like seriously, nobody to lean on?”

“That’s how I like it.”

He grumbles inaudibly under his breath at your response, a mixture of frustration and annoyance echoing through his voice. He chews on his bottom lip before speaking up again, this time, rather boldly.

“You’re not alone.” You look up at him, eyebrows scrunched in confusion. He thumps his chest with his right hand almost solemnly, like making an oath. “You have me. I’m your friend. I’m here for you.”

Your eyes widen in shock, a blush creeping up to your cheeks. You press your lips into a thin line, not knowing what else to say. Instead, you nod your head in acknowledgement, and return your attention back to your homework. When you are done with the practice questions, you flip over your notebook so that he can copy your answers.

The first time he called you ‘sayang’ was in the spring of your freshman year. He said it after having heard your mother say that as she bid you goodbye for school. He had let it slip, almost by accident, as he repeated the word over and over in his mind as the two of you walked—sounding it out, feeling the weight of it in his mouth. He liked the way it rolled across his tongue, and something about it—the curve of the letters when spelled out, the softness of it seemed so you. When you had heard it, you stopped, the hair on the back of your neck raising as you looked back at him, almost incredulously. He stares back, puzzled at your reaction. This was the first time he had ever seen your reserved demeanor crack.

“What? What did I do?” He asked, genuine concern evident in his voice.

“What did you say?”

“What, ‘sayang’?” His hands move up to straighten his tie, suddenly nervous. “I’m sorry, was that a bad word?”

“No, it’s..” your voice trails off, cheeks reddening. You turn around and stomp forward, hands tight around the straps of your backpack. “Forget it. Don’t call me that.”

He stays at his place on the street, feet glued to the pavement, wondering what he had done wrong. The guilt creeps in, and in an attempt to absolve it, he hands you a steaming hot pork bun in between classes, even though the heat burns his skin and his fingertips are still red at the end of the school day. It’s something he’s willing to do for your forgiveness. Over the years he will find that he’s willing to do a lot for it, actually. Later, over dinner, he finds out through your mother that it's actually a term of endearment, something close to ‘my love’. The two of you exchanged awkward, embarrassed glances across the table.

The second time he called you ‘sayang’, it was by accident again—spoken absentmindedly as he thanked you for explaining the assignment. Thank you sayang, he said, before realizing and slapping his mouth with his hand. You looked at him with an equal amount of shock and horror. You excused yourself to the bathroom to compose yourself, and when you returned, the two of you acted like it had never happened. He wanted to apologize, but apologizing would mean having to explain himself, and that explanation would mean having to tell you that he had tried learning Indonesian and thought of calling you ‘sayang’ the same way they did in your mother’s sinetrons (Indonesian soap operas).

And you weren’t sure the exact moment that things had changed for the two of you. Before, it was a co-existence, the understanding that you existed in each other's worlds and just that. Now, it had warped into an odd and unfamiliar shape. He was running up to you in the hall, babbling on and on about every single thing—he was more Kuroo than he ever was before around you. And you couldn’t help but notice how much bolder and brighter he seemed. In the mornings on the walk to school, next to you, smiling through his stories of his strange dreams—you couldn’t help but notice that his eyes were actually hazel and not brown, and for a moment, before your consciousness kicked in, you thought he looked beautiful.

The third time he called you ‘sayang’, it was on purpose. No longer a freudian slip or accident, but deliberately—with intention.

The two of you were in the infirmary—you, pressing an ice pack to his swollen cheek, and him, wincing at the sharp sensation. A fight had broken out. It was his friend, that same friend, calling you mute again, but this time Kuroo wasn’t as forgiving. There was the mashing of fists and bruises and a black eye again. His, not yours. Just like when you were kids the first time you met on the playground.

“You didn’t have to do that for me,” you speak up, finding some strength in the words. A rage bubbled in your stomach. You couldn’t make up whether you were upset at him or for him. He reaches out to touch the skin of your wrist, the first time he had ever done anything of the sort, and tries his best to keep his swollen eye open. The red will turn ugly and purple within a matter of hours.

“I wanted to,” he says softly, almost like a whisper, voice hoarse from yelling. “They don’t get to do that. Not to you.”

Your expression is almost pained, torn between screaming at him for his showmanship or kissing him for it. You couldn’t decide.

“Still,” you sound, “you didn’t have to.”

“I wanted to,” he repeats, this time, even softer. His other hand plucks out the second button from his uniform, his chest peeking through. He removes the ice pack and slips the button in between where your hand and his cheek meet. It’s still tender and aching, but the skin of his neck, where your pinkie finger grazed over, was so warm and inviting—so soft it seemed like a shame not to touch. You run your thumb over his jaw, tracing over the shape of it, and he winces. Still, he grabs your wrist and presses your hand against his cheek even harder, turning his head to plant a kiss on the skin of your palm.

You didn’t know your hands could ever feel like that. It was as if there were a hundred million nerves that you didn’t know previously existed, and now, suddenly all firing. It was almost too much.

“Sayang,” he mumbles into your hand, lips tracing on your skin—you don’t pull away. You are mesmerized, struck. How you went so long without having reached out for him you wouldn’t know. Again he calls you sayang, whispering it with his eyes closed, almost like a prayer. You bite your lip.

“Yes?” You answer.

His eyes flutter open, a small look of shock painted that is immediately replaced with relief, and then—a grin splitting his face, lips stretched as far as they could with the swelling. His hands wound tightly around yours, and again, that feeling of electricity, soaring right through you.

“You answered,” he says, almost breathlessly.

“You called,” you reply.

It would take 2 weeks for the black eye to heal completely, but even less time for him to slowly integrate ‘sayang’ into his everyday vocabulary. The word that once seemed awkward and bulky now slid off smoothly from his mouth every chance he got. He liked it. Liked the way it felt rolling off his tongue, liked the way you looked every time he did, but most importantly—he liked how nobody else (apart from your mother) called you that. Like an exclusive nickname, but thousand-fold. He tried learning Indonesian again, as an easy way to impress you. Selamat pagi (good morning). Terima kasih (thank you). Cantik (beautiful). On your birthday, he had prepared and memorized a little speech in your mother tongue. You laughed when he said ‘aku cinta kamu’. You tell him nobody says ‘I love you’ like that.

“They only use ‘aku sayang kamu’”, you explain.

“Why not ‘cinta’?” He pouts, flustered at his mistake. “Cinta also means love, right?”

“Cinta and sayang are different,” you explain, cutting into the cake your mother had baked: pandan with coconut and brown sugar frosting. She searched for the ingredients for weeks.

“Cinta is a declaration. Sayang is a promise,” you place the slice of cake on his plate, pushing it towards him, “sayang is the promise of loving someone no matter what—whether that love is reciprocated, whether it is burdensome.”

He shoves his mouth full in an attempt to soothe his embarrassment. The cake is fragrant and light, a foreign medley of flavors on his tongue. He looks over in your direction, happily digging into the treat, and worries that no matter how much he tries to learn about your culture, there will always be a divide—some unabridged gap he will never be able to cross. When the two of you join a cultural exchange trip to Indonesia in the summer before your senior year, he witnesses firsthand how you spring back to life—like a wilting plant finally being watered.

The two of you ravage through the city, attending bustling night markets and festivals. He watches in shock as you devour heaps of sambal with your food. You bargain with a lady for a fair price on batik, a souvenir and reminder of Indonesia that you wanted him to have. You wear these in weddings, you tell him. His mind wanders to you wearing white, walking down the aisle. You run up and down beaches, drink out of coconuts, plumeria flower tucked behind your ear, and chat with the locals—relieved to finally be surrounded by people who looked and talked like you. He watches you throw your head back laughing, and feels his heart ache. You had been homesick all this time. Trapped in a foreign country and forced to abandon your culture for his, living in a society that merely tolerated her identity, never embracing it. His home was not yours, this he now understood.

So when you told him that you were going to move back for college he wasn’t surprised. The country had recovered from the bloodbath of ‘98 and was now brimming with potential for growth. Even Forbes had called it the tiger of Southeast Asia. Some of your friends were also returning. It was a land of undiscovered opportunity.

“I have to go back,” you explained to him. “In Indonesia, I can be somebody; here, I am always second-class.”

And it stung, because he knew you were right, and he knew that it was cruel to make you stay—like keeping a butterfly in a jar. When he sends you off, he can’t help but think of his mother. That was one of the things the two of you had in common: the both of you leaving him. However, this time he doesn’t cry or scream or beg the way he did. He lets you go, maybe even with a little bit of grace, and he does so because cinta and sayang meant different things and he meant the latter.

“Aku sayang kamu,” he tells you as he waves you off. I love you. I love you enough to let you go.

When the two of you meet again, it will be years later and you will be older. You will be dressed in white and he will be in his batik that you had gotten for him all those years ago. He will stand, awestruck, as you walk down the aisle—not towards him, but towards somebody else, and his heart will ache in the way that it did only for you.

Sayang, he will think, but not in the affectionate way. In the way that implies unbelievable loss.

Sayang. A two-syllable word that’s used to convey both love and loss in the Indonesian language. It was strange, the way something could mean the exact opposite of itself, but Indonesian was strange like that. A language that was filled with metaphors and contradictions. One that is hard to forget, and even harder to unlearn. Each word carried a weight, a duality that made almost every conversation a dance between clarity and ambiguity. It was as if the language itself knew that life was never just one thing; it was a series of paradoxes, constantly contradicting itself, where joy and sorrow often walked hand in hand.

Its counterpart definition implied grief. You used it when talking about missed opportunities, or something that goes wrong when you wish it hadn’t. It almost means: what a shame. It was just one of those things that can’t be translated just as is, because the definition was so much deeper. The same way its first definition meant to love someone unconditionally, the second meant to describe the heartache that lingers in the face of loss, a longing that never quite fades. A word that blended affection and regret all in one and could only be understood by someone who felt both at once.

He felt it then, watching you get married to somebody else.

Sayang sekali, he says.

I love you, and also, what a waste.

· · ─────── ·{ ✐ᝰ.ᐟ}· ─────── · ·

author’s note: my debut entry in the haikyuu fandom and its angst 😭😭 aNYWAYS WHERE ARE THE KUROO FANS MAKE SOME NOISE 🫵🫵🗣️🗣️‼️‼️ huge shoutout to @zumicho for having to hear me ramble on and on abt the fic and take forever to write it but it’s finally here !!!! and I’m so excited to share more w u guys aaaa I hope you guys like it 🥰🥰💥💥💥💥

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transparentgentlemenmarker · 2 months

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This woman, Angela Carini, is crying because her dream of winning a medal for her late father was destroyed in 46 seconds.

Male boxer Imane Khelif beat up Angela Carini and punched her in the face.

C'est le visage d'une femme obligée de combattre un homme en raison des règles qui nuisent aux femmes. Le jour le plus sombre pour le sport féminin. Angela Carini (Italie) a été privée de ses rêves olympiques victime du wokisme représenté par Imane Khelif (Algérie)

Tout comme Adrien Quatennens qui a remporté l’OR en boxe féminine.

Certains sont persuadés que la boxeuse algérienne est bien une femme

August 2 2024 Lin Yu‑ting (Taiwan) a male with XY chromosomes defeats Sitora Turdibekova (Uzbekistan) in the women’s boxing category.

#angela carini #paris 2024 #jeux olympiques #imane khelif #lin yu‑ting #sitora turdibekova #boxe

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alwida10 · 4 months

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Ugh. I hate getting political, so have some bullet points.

- Putin laments the fact that the Soviet Union has vanished. One of his major goals is to re-establish it. This has been said openly.

- the Soviet Union included regions young people from today know only as autonomous countries, including Armenia, Aserbaidschan, Estland, Georgia, Kasachstan, Kirgisien, Lettland, Litauen, Moldawien, Tadschikistan, Turkmenien/Turkmenistan, Ukraine, Usbekistan, Belarus. (Countries in bold are the countries I remember evidence of Russia has tampered with. Might be more, since my memory sucks.)

- to ensure the comeback of the Soviet Union, Putin (Russia) uses war tactics to destabilize, control and manipulate the countries to make it more likely to re-unite with Russia. Remember how Belarus’s elections have been tampered with and the bloody crushing of the protests? Moldavia has been calling for help regarding the Russian troops in their country. If you haven’t heard about Ukraine, this post isn’t for you.

- if you are able to read Russian, it’s easy to find the war plan Russia has developed to ensure this goal, including the annexation of Ukraine, Moldavia up to attacks on Poland and east-Germany.

- the biggest problem for Russia to reach this goal is the NATO, and that mostly because the USA had the NATO’s back.

- as long as the nato stands together it’s almost impossible for Putin to reach his goal.

- “devide and conquer”

-by now it’s well documented that Russian involvement led to Trump’s victory.

- the same people, who organized Trump’s campaign, later campaigned for the pro-Brexit side.

- Trump (being right wing) wanted the US to leave the NATO. Brexit has weakened the cohesion in the EU.

- the right wing parties have been growing in Europe. Italy and Netherland have already elected right wing parties as their leadership. The right wing party in Germany is most likely the second strongest party in the eu elections right now. (Yes, the modern day Nazis. Yes, Nazis.)

- right wing parties are more likely to say “what do I care about my neighbors getting bombed? I’m caring about MY people.” They support getting big (hence powerful) positions such as the NATO getting divided into smaller, easier to beat fractions. Poland does not stand a chance against Russia on its own. The NATO does.

- both Iran (because of the conflict in the Middle East) and China (because of their intend to annex Taiwan) love and support Putin’s tactic to divide and weaken the NATO. The USA are madly powerful, but not even they are able to take on three nuclear powers at the same time.

——

k, why am I talking about this?

-> if you come across anti-Biden, anti-EU, anti-democrat, pro-segregation posts or opinions you NEED to ask yourself if this might be political manipulation to weaken your country. It had been the young voters who put Trump out of office. It’s the young voters Russia and other manipulative powers have on their radar now. YOU are the target to reach their goals.

-> yes, this includes pro-Palestine messaging if it leads into a “don’t vote for Biden” narrative.

#us politics #eu politics #Putin #war in Ukraine e

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justinssportscorner · 1 month

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Josh Peter at USA Today:

PARIS –Taiwan’s Lin Yu-Ting, one of two female boxers targeted in a “gender eligibility’’ controversy at the Paris Olympics, capped the turbulent experience in similar fashion. Triumphantly. Lin won a gold medal Saturday night by beating Poland’s Julia Szeremeta on points by unanimous decision in the finals of the women’s featherweight division (126 pounds) at Roland-Garros Stadium. Leading with a crisp jab, Lin won the first two rounds convincingly and danced free from trouble in the third round. The victory came one night after Algeria’s Imane Khelif won a gold medal by beating China’s Yang Liu in the finals of the women’s welterweight (146 pounds) division.

Both Lin and Khelif have been subjected to abuse on social media and inaccurate online speculation about their sexes even though the International Olympic Committee (IOC) has said they both have met all criteria and that there’s no question they are women.

Lin Yu-ting of Chinese Taipei (Taiwan) 🇹🇼 wins women's boxing featherweight gold medal 🏅 .

J.K., Riley, and the other anti-trans bullies who tried to take her (and Imane Khelif) down several pegs can suck it!

#Lin Yu Ting #Boxing #Women's Boxing #Women's Sports #Transgender #J.K. Rowling #Riley Gaines #2024 Summer Olympics #2024 Paris Olympics

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dailyhistoryposts · 10 months

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A Rundown of Henry Kissinger's Life

“Once you’ve been to Cambodia, you’ll never stop wanting to beat Henry Kissinger to death with your bare hands. You will never again be able to open a newspaper and read about that treacherous, prevaricating, murderous scumbag sitting down for a nice chat with Charlie Rose or attending some black-tie affair for a new glossy magazine without choking. Witness what Henry did in Cambodia – the fruits of his genius for statesmanship – and you will never understand why he’s not sitting in the dock at The Hague next to Milošević. While Henry continues to nibble nori rolls and remaki at A-list parties, Cambodia, the neutral nation he secretly and illegally bombed, invaded, undermined, and then threw to the dogs, is still trying to raise itself up on its one remaining leg.”

--Anthony Bourdain (2018)

It's difficult to be precise, but all told Henry Kissinger killed hundreds of thousands of civilians in pursuit of American business interests.

EARLY LIFE

Henry Kissinger was born in 1923 as Heinz Kissinger in Fürth, Bavaria, Germany, to a German-Jewish family. Throughout his youth, he was relentlessly and violently harassed and discriminated against by members of the Hitler Youth and authorities. At the age of 15, Kissinger and his family fled Nazi Germany, settling in New York City. He finished high school at George Washington High School in NYC and began studying accounting at the City College of New York, but his undergraduate studies were interrupted in 1943 when he was drafted into the US army.

In the army, fluent German speakers were in short supply, so Kissinger was quickly assigned to military intelligence. During the American invasion of Germany, he worked to set up civilian administration of conquered cities and tracked down Gestapo officers as a Special Agent of the Counter Intelligence Corps. He received the Bronze Star Medal

After his time in the army, Kissinger returned to his studies. He graduated summa cum laude in political science from Harvard College, as well as his Masters and PhD. He taught at Harvard, and his studies focused on international 'legitimacy', when an international order is widely accepted by international leaders, without regard to public opinion or morality.

POLITICS

Beginning in the 1950s, Kissinger began to be more active on the political stage. He was a consultant for the National Security Council and a study director for the Council of Foreign Relations. He notably was against Eisenhower's massive retaliation nuclear doctrine, where the United States would respond to a nuclear attack with a much, much greater nuclear attack. Instead, Kissinger advocated the use of tactical nuclear weapons on a regular basis in more wars.

In the 1960s, Kissinger began working with Republicans running for office as an advisor in foreign affairs. He contributed to the Nixon campaign, and when Nixon took office in 1969, Kissinger was appointed as National Security Advisor, and later Secretary of State. As a diplomat, Kissinger heavily used Realpolitik, the in-fashion Cold War approach focusing on pragmatism and realistic outcomes rather than ideological or moral purity. In international politics, it largely has to do with obtaining and maintaining power on the world stage.

Kissinger focused on relaxing US tensions with the USSR and China, leading an American foreign policy that supported Taiwan on the face but in the shadows removed all support for Taiwan and essentially waited for it to fall apart.

In 1974, he directed the National Security Study Memorandum 200: Implications of Worldwide Population Growth for U.S. Security and Overseas Interests (NSSM200), sometimes called the "Kissinger Report" the official United States policy for many years, though it remained classified until the 1990s. The Kissinger Report advocated for population control in undeveloped nations to ensure easy resource extraction and protect American business interests abroad. Projects were designed to reduce fertility while keeping up the appearance of improving quality of life--the plan specifically attempted to avoid an appearance of "economic or racial imperialism". Birth rate was particularly noted due to concerns about an adequate global food supply and because young people more readily fight back against corruption and imperialism. The Report also brought up increasing abortion rates as a method of obtaining this goal.

In 1975, policies based on the Report went into affect. The National Security Council would recommend withholding food and using military force to prevent population growth, prioritizing aid for small families, and even paying people to get sterilized. Thirteen countries were named as particularly problematic to US interests. Of note, Nigeria lost development and the United States took control of Nigerian resources, and the United States Agency for International Development (USAID) was responsible for some of the 300,000 forced sterilizations in Peru--largely impoverished or indigenous women--during the Fujimori administration. The Fujimori government has been accused of crimes against humanity by the International Criminal Court for these abuses, and today the Peruvian economy suffers due to the low population resulting from these sterilizations.

ACTIONS IN SOUTHEAST ASIA

The Vietnam War had started back in 1955. Kissinger had originally supported it, but as time dragged on began to view it as harming American prestige. Kissinger leaked information about peace talks to get into power at Nixon's side, and then failed to end the war in 1972, leading to the Christmas bombings. A very similar agreement was signed the next month, leading to a ceasefire (that would collapse) and the withdrawal of American troops--bitterly seen as a betrayal by South Vietnam. When Kissinger and Vietnamese diplomat Lê Đức Thọ were jointly awarded the Nobel Peace Prize for this, Thọ declined to accept it and two members of the Nobel Committee left it in protest.

It was in the middle of the Vietnam War, and during the Cambodian Civil War, that Operation Menu and Operational Freedom Deal went into play. From March 1969 to May 1970, the United States Strategic Air Command carried out a series of first tactical and then carpet bombings in eastern Cambodia. Then, from May 1970 to August 1973, the United States provided close air support and widespread bombing. Part of a 'secret' war to support the Kingdom of Cambodia/Khmer Republic against communist rebels, it ultimately failed and the communists would take power in 1975.

In the Bangladesh Liberation War in 1971, Nixon and Kissinger supported the Pakistani president Yahya Khan. It was in this that the strongest dissent in the history of the U.S. Foreign Service, the Blood Telegram (named after sender Archer Blood), was sent. It reports the US was about to lose, describes systemic abuses, and uses the word 'genocide' to describe the actions by US-supported Pakistan. It said the US government was morally bankrupt. Blood was recalled early from Bangladesh, and US interests were lost when Bangladeshi Independence was secured within the year.

MIDDLE EASTERN POLICY

Kissinger was originally excluded from any policy-making on Israel, as part of Nixon's orders to exclude all Jewish-Americans from such work. Still, in 1973, when Kissinger became Secretary of State, he was included in all US Middle Eastern policy. This means he was largely responsible for the handling of the Yom Kippur War--this handling included not noticing precipitating factors leading up to it (he was so engrossed in Paris peace talks he didn't notice the Egyptian President Sadat ready to move on Sinai), delaying telling Nixon about and stalled negotiating a ceasefire, hoping Israel would push across and fully obtain the Suez Canal.

Kissinger's diplomacy included giving equipment to Israel, but not as much as he'd promised, and selling weapons to Saudi Arabia at the same time, in exchange for access to Saudi Arabian oil. By largely handling to event and not involving France or the United Kingdom, and by minimizing the power of the Soviet Union, Kissinger took large steps in giving US power over much of the Middle East.

It should be noted that this was done purely to protect US interests rather than any form of Jewish security. When questioned about the persecution of Soviet Jews at the same time, Kissinger said

"The emigration of Jews from the Soviet Union is not an objective of American foreign policy, and if they put Jews into gas chambers in the Soviet Union, it is not an American concern. Maybe a humanitarian concern."

-Henry Kissinger (1973)

Also in the region., Kissinger supported Iran against Iraq.

TURKISH INVASION OF CYPRUS

In 1974, the Greek military regime and Turkiye invaded the island of Cyprus. The military regime had been supported by Kissinger, and anti-Kissinger sentiment was strong among young people. Cyprus is now an independent island country, though its northeast portion is de facto separate, making up the self-declared Turkish Republic of Northern Cyprus. Kissinger considers his own handling of the Cyprus Issue unfavorably.

LATIN AMERICA

With Kissinger's influence, the United States maintained relations with non-left-wing governments regardless of commitment to democracy. It was with Kissinger's input that the CIA encouraged a military coup against Chilean president-elect Salvador Allende due to his socialist ideals.

Operation Condor, a US-backed program of political repression by right-wing dictatorships of southern South America, was also Kissinger's work. It included assassinations, the Dirty War in Argentina, and supporting Brazil's nuclear weapons program because it would benefit the U.S. private nuclear industry.

SOME OTHER STUFF

Kissinger's policy on post-WWII decolonization was mixed, based on what would benefit the U.S. He helped transition Rhodesia (now Zimbabwe) away from White minority rule, expressed moderate support for the Portuguese Colonial Empire, and helped Indonesia occupy East Timor.

After Watergate forced Nixon to resign, Kissinger stayed on under President Ford but left office when Democrat Jimmy Carter came into power. He was offered an endowed chair at Columbia University, which was canceled due to student opposition, but was appointed to Georgetown University instead. He ran a consulting firm, supported the Chinese government in the Tiananmen Square massacre, and served on the 2000 Commission of the International Olympic Committee. He was supposed to help President Bush respond to the 9/11 attacks but stepped down because he refused to reveal if he had a business conflict of interest.

In 2010, he took a strong stance urging world governments to destroy all nuclear weapons. In the 2014 Ukrainian crisis, he said that Crimea should remain under Ukrainian sovereignty, but in the 2022 Russian invasion of Ukraine said that Crimea and Donbas should be given to Russia.

Kissinger was a board member of Theranos, Elizabeth Holmes' biotech scam.

In response to the 2023 Hamas attack on Israel, and seeing pro-Palestinian protestors in Germany, Kissinger called Muslim immigration into Germany "a grave mistake".

DEATH

Kissinger died peacefully in his home in Connecticut on November 29th, 2023,

#history #destiel #henry kissinger #imperialism #anti imperialism #if any of you use this as an excuse to be antisemitic or prolife im coming for all your bones

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linghxr · 1 year

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75 essential single-character verbs (单字动词)

When I started consuming more native Chinese content, I quickly discovered an area in which my knowledge was lacking: single-character verbs. In my experience, it’s very easy to focus on learning words consisting of two or more characters and overlook single-character words.

Driven by curiosity, I went through my Anki deck (and also wracked my brain) to generate a list of characters/words that I have learned over the past couple years (roughly). Then I selected 75 verbs that are fairly common and important to know. They skew towards intermediate and advanced vocabulary.

Definitions are from MDBG. For characters with additional meanings that I am not yet familiar with, I have bolded the meanings I want to share.

(1) 抢 qiǎng - to fight over / to rush / to scramble / to grab / to rob / to snatch

(2) 救 jiù - to save / to assist / to rescue

(3) 扶 fú - to support with the hand / to help sb up / to support oneself by holding onto something / to help

(4) 催 cuī - to urge / to press / to prompt / to rush sb / to hasten sth / to expedite

(5) 夹 jiā - to press from either side / to place in between / to sandwich / to carry sth under armpit / wedged between / between / to intersperse / to mix / to mingle / clip / folder / Taiwan pr. [jia2]

(6) 咬 yǎo - to bite / to nip

(7) 砸 zá - to smash / to pound / to fail / to muck up / to bungle

(8) 毁 huǐ - to destroy / to ruin / to defame / to slander

(9) 嚷 rǎng - to shout / to bellow / to make a big deal of sth / to make a fuss about sth

(10) 塞 sāi - to stop up / to squeeze in / to stuff / cork / stopper

(11) 贪 tān - to have a voracious desire for / to covet / greedy / corrupt

(12) 拆 chāi - to tear open / to tear down / to tear apart / to open

(13) 掏 tāo - to fish out (from pocket) / to scoop

(14) 跪 guì - to kneel

(15) 摘 zhāi - to take / to borrow / to pick (flowers, fruit etc) / to pluck / to select / to remove / to take off (glasses, hat etc)

(16) 拎 līn - to lift up / to carry in one's hand / Taiwan pr. [ling1]

(17) 扛 káng - to carry on one's shoulder / (fig.) to take on (a burden, duty etc)

(18) 拽 zhuài - to pull / to tug at (sth)

(19) 愣 lèng - to look distracted / to stare blankly / distracted / blank / (coll.) unexpectedly / rash / rashly

(20) 搂 lǒu - to hug / to embrace / to hold in one's arms

(21) 垮 kuǎ - to collapse (lit. or fig.)

(22) 撑 chēng - to support / to prop up / to push or move with a pole / to maintain / to open or unfurl / to fill to bursting point / brace / stay / support

(23) 甩 shuǎi - to throw / to fling / to swing / to leave behind / to throw off / to dump (sb)

(24) 围 wéi - to encircle / to surround / all around / to wear by wrapping around (scarf, shawl)

(25) 愁 chóu - to worry about

(26) 插 chā - to insert / stick in / pierce / to take part in / to interfere / to interpose

(27) 漏 lòu - to leak / to divulge / to leave out by mistake / waterclock or hourglass (old)

(28) 披 pī - to drape over one's shoulders / to open / to unroll / to split open / to spread out

(29) 歇 xiē - to rest / to take a break / to stop / to halt / (dialect) to sleep / a moment / a short while

(30) 抄 chāo - to make a copy / to plagiarize / to search and seize / to raid / to grab / to go off with / to take a shortcut / to make a turning move / to fold one's arms

(31) 哼 hēng - to groan / to snort / to hum / to croon / humph!

(32) 哄 hǒng - to deceive / to coax / to amuse (a child)

(33) 啃 kěn - to gnaw / to nibble / to bite

(34) 眯 mī - to narrow one's eyes / to squint / (dialect) to take a nap

(35) 趴 pā - to lie on one's stomach / to lean forward, resting one's upper body (on a desktop etc) / (Tw) percent

(36) 揍 zòu - to hit / to beat (sb) / (coll.) to smash (sth)

(37) 蹭 cèng - to rub against / to walk slowly / (coll.) to freeload

(38) 凑 còu - to gather together, pool or collect / to happen by chance / to move close to / to exploit an opportunity

(39) 敲 qiāo - to hit / to strike / to tap / to rap / to knock / to rip sb off / to overcharge

(40) 滑 huá - to slip / to slide / slippery / smooth / sly / slippery / not to be trusted

(41) 碎 suì - to break down / to break into pieces / fragmentary

(42) 盯 dīng - to watch attentively / to fix one's attention on / to stare at / to gaze at

(43) 塌 tā - to collapse / to droop / to settle down

(44) 背 bēi - to be burdened / to carry on the back or shoulder 背 bèi - the back of a body or object / to turn one's back / to hide something from / to learn by heart / to recite from memory / unlucky (slang) / hard of hearing

(45) 数 shǔ - to count / to count as / to regard as / to enumerate (sb's shortcomings)

(46) 按 àn - to press / to push / to leave aside or shelve / to control / to restrain / to keep one's hand on / to check or refer to / according to / in the light of / (of an editor or author) to make a comment

(47) 压 yā - to press / to push down / to keep under (control) / pressure

(48) 亲 qīn - parent / one's own (flesh and blood) / relative / related / marriage / bride / close / intimate / in person / first-hand / in favor of / pro- / to kiss / (Internet slang) dear

(49) 补 bǔ - to repair / to patch / to mend / to make up for / to fill (a vacancy) / to supplement

(50) 舔 tiǎn - to lick / to lap

(51) 拼 pīn - to piece together / to join together / to stake all / adventurous / at the risk of one's life / to spell

(52) 埋 mái - to bury

(53) 抖 dǒu - to tremble / to shake out / to reveal / to make it in the world

(54) 涂 tú - to apply (paint etc) / to smear / to daub / to blot out / to scribble / to scrawl / (literary) mud / street

(55) 抹 mǒ - to smear / to wipe / to erase / classifier for wisps of cloud, light-beams etc

(56) 吞 tūn - to swallow / to take

(57) 拦 lán - to block sb's path / to obstruct / to flag down (a taxi)

(58) 露 lòu - to show / to reveal / to betray / to expose 露 lù - dew / syrup / nectar / outdoors (not under cover) / to show / to reveal / to betray / to expose

(59) 滚 gǔn - to boil / to roll / to take a hike / Get lost!

(60) 扣 kòu - to fasten / to button / button / buckle / knot / to arrest / to confiscate / to deduct (money) / discount / to knock / to smash, spike or dunk (a ball) / to cover (with a bowl etc) / (fig.) to tag a label on sb / (Tw) (loanword) code

(61) 夸 kuā - to boast / to exaggerate / to praise

(62) 挥 huī - to wave / to brandish / to command / to conduct / to scatter / to disperse

(63) 求 qiú - to seek / to look for / to request / to demand / to beseech

(64) 吸 xī - to breathe / to suck in / to absorb / to inhale

(65) 响 xiǎng - echo / sound / noise / to make a sound / to sound / to ring / loud / classifier for noises

(66) 擦 cā - to wipe / to erase / rubbing (brush stroke in painting) / to clean / to polish

(67) 踩 cǎi - to step on / to tread / to stamp / to press a pedal / to pedal (a bike) / (online) to downvote

(68) 撕 sī - to tear

(69) 扫 sǎo - to sweep

(70) 锁 suǒ - to lock / to lock up / a lock (CL:把)

(71) 扎 zhā - to prick / to run or stick (a needle etc) into / mug or jug used for serving beer (loanword from "jar")

(72) 撞 zhuàng - to knock against / to bump into / to run into / to meet by accident

(73) 追 zhuī - to chase / to pursue / to look into / to investigate / to reminisce / to recall / to court (one's beloved) / to binge-watch (a TV drama) / retroactively / posthumously

(74) 抽 chōu - to draw out / to pull out from in between / to remove part of the whole / (of certain plants) to sprout or bud / to whip or thrash

(75) 删 shān - to delete

794 notes · View notes