#TO CHOOSE YOUR OWN PURPOSE?
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day 2 of taking my meds: dozed off after taking it and woke up writing an essay in my head about The Point of Art, Life, and Modern Art
#acorn speaks#*banging pots and pans*#ART REFLECTS THE WORLD AND THE UNIVERSE IN WHICH WE LIVE#LIFE HAS NO PURPOSE THE UNIVERSE HAS NO PURPOSE#AND THEREFORE THERE IS NO POINT TO ART#AND THAT MAY SEEM SCARY BUT ISNT THAT AWESOME??#TO HAVE FREE WILL?#TO CHOOSE YOUR OWN PURPOSE?#MODERN ART SPITS IN THE FACE OF THE IDEA THAT ART EXISTS TO PLEASE AND MAKE YOU FEEL GOOD#AND FOR THAT IT IS HATED#BUT IF YOU LEARN TO UNDERSTAND MODERN ART YOU LEARN TO UNDERSTAND ALL ART AND LIFE AND THE UNIVERSE#There is no definition of ‘what is art’#and no answer to ‘what is the point of art’#if you ever come up with an answer that encompasses it all then someone will make art that lies outside of it#if you try to insist that something outside that definition isn’t really art then you are doomed to lose#people have tried to argue that modern art isn’t art for more than a century now (depending on when you think the modern art movement began#(here I am using 1915 when kazimir malevich painted his first black square)#I’ve been arguing that art has no point but that is shorthand for what i really mean#Art has no INHERENT point#the meaning of a piece is dependent on the artist and the viewer#that means that Art can try to make you happy. or sad. or angry. or anything#and if you choose to ask ‘why?’ you get the opportunity to answer#humanity is neither inherently good nor bad#if humanity is inherently bad then someone choosing to do bad can’t be blamed. its in their nature#if humanity is inherently good and someone chooses to do good then so what. its in their nature#but if humanity is inherently neither good nor bad then someones choices carries full weight#someone doing bad CAN be blamed. someone doing good CAN be commended#it is up to the individual to make moral choices#and Life has no meaning; but you get to choose one for yourself. isn’t that so much better?#disclaimer this is not an essay because i didnt cite any sources and also i only get 30 tags as opposed to like at least 20 pages lol
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To specify (because there is a character limit in polls), I am asking if it’s okay for consumers of your work to leave comments with criticism of the show and also if you are okay with people leaving comments with constructive criticism of your work
If you can, specify what type of creator you are in the tags!
#I have seen a lot of opinions on this matter#and I want to know what the general consensus is#no other purpose to this but my curiosity#but that is certainly reason enough for me to make a poll#also#use your own discretion for these answers#if you aren’t sure if you’re a creator#or you aren’t sure if your opinion is nuanced#or for or against#just choose what feels right#reblog for a bigger sample size#please!#miraculous ladybug#mlb#miraculous#ml#ml fandom#ml writers#ml artists#ml polls#my polls#poll
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one day fans will realize that treating real people like fictional characters and fictional characters like real people is, at the core of things, The Problem
#luke newton#nicola coughlan#polin#lukola#penelope featherington#colin bridgerton#bridgerton#the invasive speculation like you're doing meta analysis of a plotline and not REAL LIVES is deeply uncomfortable#people in real person shipping communities have to come to understand that they are not in fact a fan of the real people#you do not know and will never know the actuality of these celebrities you are a fan of#realize NOW that you are a fan of their PERSONAS and absolutely nothing else#and that the purpose of shipping is not 'oh they'll get together' (so i'm RIGHT) but instead 'i enjoy this dynamic'#the pressure of validation from people who owe you nothing is what makes fans upset#not real people's actions that harm no one#which means you hurt your own feelings and then spiral in circles about how you didn't get said validation#when you were never owed it and choose to put the onus of responsibility on others behaving how you want#and not placing the responsibility on YOURSELF to have reasonable expectations and respect the people you claim to stan#build the bridge and get over it#some of y'all mad disrespectful like these celebs don't straight up hate you for how you behave#as they are well within reason to do so
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Thinking about how these two met. Get adopted, idiot.
More human!Echo.
#adopted as in “you are my sibling now; no take-backsies”#I just love the idea of Echo seeing this deranged little gecko and being like “Get away from me” and Treecko being like “Make me”#Grovyle's stubbornness overpowering Echo's festering anger is the best okay#Him choosing to love Echo despite their flaws and Echo in turn becoming a better person through exposure#Learning what it means to have a purpose; to have someone you care for so deeply that you'd protect them over valuing your own life#Echo yearning to see the past and all of its wonders because Grovyle has nurtured this new love through stories and old texts#A yearning to see the sun; the real sun and feel it's warmth because it's Grovyle's dream but having the strangest feeling of guilt#A guilt she cannot understand because it's buried deep inside and clouded in amnesia and pain and regret#I am emotional okay#another art post so quickly? yes#I blame everyone that left me nice replies and tags on my last human!Echo post#thanks for encouraging me to make more content I love you guys#Will try to write up some lore soon to share!!!#echo/human#echo/umbreon#pmd ocs#pmd grovyle#pmd2#pmd eos#pmd explorers#explorers of sky#my art
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today's hot take for dog people: management is not the same thing as training.
#dogblr#unpopular opinion: a lot of the current flavour of dog 'training' is actually just management#does your dog know how to make a good decision? does your dog know what a good decision even is?#or is your dog under such heavy management that they never ever have to make a decision on their own?#YES set your dog and yourself up for success!!!! absolutely!!!!#but (unpopular take) errorless learning is detrimental to overall wellbeing#stress is a part of life and of your dog crumples when they experience A Stress then you have a serious problem#teach resilience as a skill#dont misunderstand this on purpose#im not saying let your dog run wild unruly unmanaged#im saying train your skills and then trust your training#when it is safe to do so let your dog make a decision#(this is not in response to anyone on here#i am casual irl acquaintances with a service dog handler and i do not respect her handling/training/management#i am very frustrated with the lack of nuance between training vs management#and the beautiful space where they overlap#people who are here from Not The Dog World#management is setting up your environment so your dog makes the decision you want#eg using a long line so your dog has no choice but to come when called#training is teaching your dog to make the decision you want them to make#ideally you would use both (management while training) but the current flavour of dog training#tends to put all responsibility on you as the person#to manage your environment so the dog never has the opportunity to make a mistake#instead of training your dog so they understand what the 'right' choice is and WANT to choose that most of the time#i am braced for the deliberate misunderstandings that are likely to come out of this post#THERE IS NUANCE PEOPLE
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Ever think about Date’s view on family and how that relates to his character? When Mizuki asks him to define family, he just awkwardly offers that its like being blood related to someone. It leaves a bitter taste in his mouth and Mizukis, but like, he literally had no idea what a real family looks like. He’s an orphan, a man who grew up with no family and no name, but he doesn’t know that yet. He has no memory of his past, no way of knowing if there’s someone out there waiting for him to come home, if he even had a place to call home. His only frame of reference for a family is Mizuki and her parents. Deep down he knows it’s not right, not loving, but it fits the mold of a nuclear family, man and woman, blood related, so that must be what family is. When he’s asked to take in Mizuki, he’s absolutely clueless because he literally has zero frame of reference for how a child is supposed to be cared for. He puts distance between them because this isn’t his place, he doesn’t have the right to love this child as his own because he isn’t the real dad. There’s no place for someone like him in a family. And it’s baffling to him to hear that Mizuki not only loves him, she needs him because he is her family. Date believes he’s a nobody, just a sad, lonely man with no name who absolutely does not deserve this kind of love. But he has it anyway because he chooses it, he makes something that neither he nor Mizuki have ever had before. HES HOME
#aitsf#ai the somnium files#kaname date#mizuki date#just crying about the date family for the millionth time nothing new#also i just had this realization that like date literally had absolutely ZERO clue what he was doing#cuz its not like he remembers his own childhood so he cant use that as a frame of reference for how to treat his own child#and yet despite this he does a much better job than renju and shoko ever did just because he like. actually loves mizuki lol#honestly kinda fucking insane that date was asked to take care of her instead of hitomi#like renju has a choice between his long term friend who hes really close with and who he knows has lots of experience in childcare#versus his silly friend who lives in the smallest apartment with tons of debt and has literally never seen a baby before#then again thats probably why he didnt choose hitomi cuz he probably wanted to keep mizuki separate from the family he actually cares about#also for meme purposes its just like date is like wow renju youre literally the worst dad ever#and renju is like well okay hotshot if you think its so easy then how about you raise my daughter asshole#and date is like okie and does a significantly better job at it#i love kaname date so fucking much you guys will never understand what we have 😩
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Fellas, is it gay to be the main character in a sports anime?
#this is a joke#but like#seriously why is it all so queer#especially#free! iwatobi swim club#free!#free! dive to the future#like fr thats just a choose your own adventure bl#they do it on purpose there#I've seen a total of 4 sports animes and there's always something#sk8 the infinity#good lord that one#at least with matchablossom#yeah i watched the dub#haikyuu#not so much in my opinion but still#oh and#kuroko's basketball#kuroko no basket#i just started it#wtf does he mean “you seemed like more than just teammates”#i mean i know what he meant but fr?#couldn't have said that any better?#ugh i don't even ship it#i specifically try not to look for ships#not that its hard#things go over my head a lot#but my gaydar definitely still works ok?
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i think when the doctor says stuff that contradicts their own life like "ive never been this far out" it's not lying or poor continuity, i think it's just memory
#i tell accidental lies about my own life and experiences daily#and im only 25#how the fuck is the doctor expected to remember all that#and even if theyve done it before#but dont remmeber#even if its not like evil mindwipe dont remember but just. regular. it's been 1000 years dont remember#if it feels to them like its the first time then for all intents and purposes of that line it is the first time#right?#i suppose thats up to your philosophy but according to mine#then it is the first time#also i think as a writer you have to pick and choose what continuities to honour or you'll drive yourself mad#i dont actually know if this particular one line was incorrect#i just think ive seen someone say so#but like im not actually entirely sure what the difference is between like#the end of the universe or the end of time or between universes or Whatever#so#what is 'farther out' who knows not me
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i am not really a zenos enjoyer in the sense i think most ppl think of it but i do appreciate what his role does for cori. like i do think it’s neat he looked at them and saw their power and then made up everything about their personality in order to see connection. it’s cool to me that cori gets to be like no, he’s wrong about me. that cori gets to have all this power and still be kind, still not be bloodthirsty in any way, still not want to engage with him. idk i just think it adds a lot!
#i try not to talk about it a lot bc on here it seems like there’s a v specific way ppl want to see it#which is like your wol HAS to have this connection with him and if you don’t like it you’re not doing it right#that there are ‘canon’ dialogue choices and every other choice is wrong#which i find really frustrating lol like the only canon thing is how he feels about the wol#you get to choose how to feel back#and it’s esp weird to me considering he himself says everyone brings their own meaning to things!#idk like he was v frustrating to me bc of this projection but in a way that worked. that was done on purpose!!!#and so to always see things about how that *wasnt* on purpose and there’s only one way you’re supposed to react to him. idk!!#my one real wish tbh is that when he says you can walk away that they really meant that lol bc that’s what cori would have done#but even cori making the choice to do that has given me stuff to work with!#i need a text post tag#endwalker spoilers#sorry i was just reading things earlier lol
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sorry for only saying this type of shit lately but i kinda wanna drive a car straight into a brick wall at the highest speed possible
#trying to keep it together so bad because i already know the problems and solutions and whatnot but i cannot do anything#i desperately just need to do something. accomplish any task. actually several would be nice. but i cannot stand just letting life go by#while i watch other people have the things i want. or even metaphorically living my dream like. that should be me why am i settling for thi#i hate even talking about this because i feel so stupid when i know it's not even a real tangible problem and that i actually DO have real#problems to tackle and the ability to do so but i'm choosing to be upset over the stupidest things i could possibly be sad about#and i can't even be sad about it in a normal way i'm cycling through like several different reactions to smth that isn't even real#or if it is real i literally do not have tanglible evidence for it one way or another like i'm driving myself insane for no reason#i can't even get catharsis because all i'm doing is digging a deeper hole for something i never should've gone back into in the first place#because i KNOW how i am i KNOW how i react to things and i still chose to do it lmao.#and i continue to choose to go through this shit instead of actively trying to change my life because... i'm lazy? and stupid? idk#negative self-talk isn't gonna get me to do anything either so let's just say i'm feeling particularly unmotivated like usual#i hated being a teenager but i really do miss when all my problems just amounted to 'someone was mean to me on tumblr today :(' or i failed#a test in chemistry or something. like i yearn for that simplicity becasue at this point all i'm doing is ruining my own life LMAO#i'm too scared to live i'm too scared to die so i just sit here and fantasize that life could be amazing if i wait#and i'll magically get everything i've ever wanted if i just wait long enough. and i know it isn't true and i still wait for it to happen.#because honestly like. i think deep down i am just convinced i will fail at anything i do when that shouldn't be what scares me.#what scares me should be never even allowing myself to fail because i never tried to do anything at all with myself or my life#like. wake the fuck up. get off your ass and put in the effort. learn some skills. gain independence and stability and discipline and do it#just live please i'm begging you just live so i can be happy don't i deserve to be happy... why am i not letting myself be happy#i'm literally keeping myself trapped in this negative feedback loop ON PURPOSE because teehee shiny toy#and it doesn't matter if the love is real it doesn't matter how i feel like i'm just using it as a distraction i can't say it's motivation#because it's barely motivated me at all. i have to start being realistic. 25 & just realizing you actually have to participate in your life#anyways. i've cried i've agonized i've pictured killing myself in 30 different ways. i think the only way i'm gonna feel better is#to just actually try this time without giving up. wish me luck
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the most unprepared demigods you ever did see
children of a miracle, don diablo and marnik / the weight, kathleen graber / unfold, porter robinson and totally enormous extinct dinosaurs / "church and state", succession (2023) / tiktok user blaineunderstudy / his stillness, sharon olds / dune: part two (2024) / andrei tarkovsky, journal 1970-1986 / electra, sophocles / the world was wide enough, lin-manuel miranda and leslie odom, jr. / little miss sunshine (2006) / soldier, poet, king, the oh hellos
#you lost your father but they're also building his altar. what now#blue eyes#cornelius#planet of the apes#dawn of the planet of the apes#war for the planet of the apes#originally made this private for My Own Purposes but even without their sister oc this is somewhat intelligible! i choose to profit!!!!!!!#honestly more succession and dune girlies should get into this franchise imagine winning so hard and by winning i mean excruciating pain#and yes i used the same quote twice what ABOUT it-
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My favorite thing my warden says in combat is "Have you no concern for your own existence!?"
She says it in every fight, I love it so much. Every time I replay, Rose needs to have the wise voice, I need to hear her say her battle catchphrase a million times per playthrough.
But my favorite time she's ever said it was when we went back to Ostagar. We've got Rose, Alistair, the mabari, and Wynne all together reliving the trauma of the battle right before we head to the landsmeet. We're actually super close to the end game so tension's high.
We're fighting darkspawn, but uh oh! "Look there--a cunning trap!" over by the stairs!
I rush Rose over there to disarm the trap, only to get interrupted by the last hurlock jumping in my way... and I see Alistair step in the damn thing just as Rose shrieks, "Have you no concern for your own existence!?"
I know in my heart of hearts that she actually said that to him. Alistair cannot stop himself, if there's an obvious bear trap on the floor, my man's gonna step in it.
By the way, I wanna know other people's favorite things their warden says. I know the ladder comment is a popular one for the violent voice, but I wanna hear all the others.
#dragon age#dragon age origins#dao#alistair theirin#rosalie tabris#dao warden tabris#it's one of the funniest things that's happened to me in dao like yes alistair please have more concern for your own existence#he always triggers traps no matter what. i even give him the trap-making skill and get his cunning up he just sees one#and goes 'oh imma step in that tehe' alistair babe my love light of my life in this world of darkness.........please#I'm starting to think he's doing it on purpose ngl#also i'm currently in dao's character creator making rose for my full canon replay of the series and picking her voice reminded me of this#so thought i'd share because it's my headcanon now that she says that to her enemies and her companions an equal amount of times sksks#i also love it when she says 'perhaps we should take the time to review what we've learned?' and 'i swear when this is over...'#personally i picked the wise voice because its a little deeper than the others. i felt rose needed a voice like that.#it's the same reason i always choose the second voice with the american accent for ash it has a tone/pitch that i like
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Poll adventure (paventure? lol) Day 4: read the small story tidbit below the poll for more details, OR just vote based on initial impression
(✦ see past poll results + further information HERE (link) ✦)
The winning option of yesterday's poll was that the adventurer should offer the Well Creature some bread and soup ….
"Completely unsure how to even begin to interact with the strange creature from the well, The Adventurer recalls reading in a book once that 'food is a universal language', or uh.. something like that.. thus, some hearty soup and bread would surely bridge any communication barriers... probably. He serves the little cannister of broth cold, straight from his bag just dumped into a wooden bowl, mostly because he's far too nervous to try and start a fire with someone watching.. hopefully they won't mind the food not being warmed..
After gently placing a single bread roll next to the soup, he steps back, gesturing towards the meal with an uncertain smile. The creature pauses, sniffs around, then promptly disappears back into the darkness. Just as The Adventurer begins to sulk over his apparent rejection, something stirs behind him... With a rush of creaking and plopping noises, the creature resurfaces, revealing it's massive serpent-like body as it hoists itself over the crumbled stone of the well's edge with it's many arms. It cracks open it's mighty jaw just far enough for a tiny blue tongue to slither out, then politely slurps at the soup, delicate enough not to spill any.
Stumbling backwards in shock, The Adventurer simply sits there staring the entire time whilst the creature happily (and rather quickly) enjoys their meal... Seemingly appreciative of his kind offerings, another strange slinking arm creeps up from the depths of the well, daintily opening a velvet sack with it's claws and laying out a small assortment of items onto the grass. Still a bit shaken, but also never one to turn down a free gift, The Adventurer senses that the creature intends for him to take any single item of his choosing... but, which one?"
#paventure posting#polls#choose your own adventure#what can I say.. I like the trope of a smaller creature actaully being a much larger scarier creature which you just dont see because the#creature is in a place/position where most of it's body is obscured lol#sometimes a little guy is actually secretly a much bigger guy of mysterious origins that spans the length of an entire#underground cave system obscured by the facade of a simple well#AND MOST important of all.. the cat is scared.. :( bapy...#also I hate writing for these it's so impossible for me to be short and simple with writing. I always want to make it#extremely detailed and 500 paragraphs long. Giving myself a limit of like 3 paragraphs and a time limit of 20 minutes#is actually impossible for my brain gjhbjhbhj#but I have to post it anyway otherwise I'd spend forever on it and never actually get these done but..hhhh#Just know I am going into my evil vampire library to collapse onto the fainting chair in anguish each time after I hit post#Telling a chronically longwinded details obsessive rambler to ''keep it short'' is like telling a cat not to meow. not to run around the#house at 3am. not to be round and perfect. It is simply against nature#ANYWAY. These items might be useful later. As he continues on his journey - he does indeed have an inventory in my mind#like he can lose and aquire things. has a limited amount of money. Can change his outfit or etc. depending on the choices#people make in the polls. These may not have an immediate purpose (though some can) they'll be factored in down the road
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Some people: Kaeya’s bio father is an abusive monster who abandoned his son in order to achieve his own selfish goals. He is an evil man who deserves everything awful that might happen to him.
Other people: Kaeya’s bio father did the right thing and leaving Kaeya in Mondstadt was the only way to give him a halfway-decent life. He is a better father than he is given credit for and should not be as hated as he is.
Me: Kaeya’s bio father is integral to the general ‘war is hell and bad choices can reverberate across time’ thing that Genshin seems to be going for. He made unethical choices, but mostly because the ONLY OPTIONS HE HAD WERE UNETHICAL. If our understanding of the Alberich’s role in Khaenri’ah is accurate, General Alberich (my name for him until stated otherwise) was suddenly in charge of a hopeless and dead kingdom which begged to be saved. Assuming that there was a reason Kaeya specifically was chosen for this mission, General Alberich was forced into a position where he needed to choose between the lives/future of every Khaenri’an vs the life and future of his young son. Abandoning either is an awful thing to do and a horrible decision, but the bad decisions of Celestia and Rhinedottir have led to a scenario where General Alberich can only make bad decisions. In the end, he chose to prioritize his people and made his young son into a spy. We do not know the process for this, but knowing how much Hoyoverse loves to torment people (especially Khaenri’ans) we can assume that this process was horrific for Kaeya and could definitely be considered abuse. General Alberich is effectively making his son into a child soldier for a war that the majority of people never wanted or asked for, and one Kaeya was likely far too young to understand. At least, until he was forced to grow up far too quickly in order to fulfill his duty. General Alberich likely loathed everything about what was happening and even in his last moments with his son he asks for forgiveness. He knows that what he is doing is wrong, but to turn back now is to both abandon his subjects and make everything that happened to Kaeya in order to turn him into a child spy be for nothing. So yeah, General Alberich is a terrible person who made horrible choices. But war and the bad actions of others have created a situation where he has nothing BUT horrible choices and where being a terrible person is the only thing he can be. And that’s without considering how the curse/abyssal corruption could impact the scenario.
#idk#I just think that Kaeya's father is kinda an Asgore situation#where the only decisions he could possibly make were awful and unethical ones but choosing neither would create an even worse outcome#also I want to clarify that both of the other interpretations that I parroted before giving my own thoughts are valid#because we are working with such limited information and yeah no shit people are gonna have differing thoughts#people have differing beliefs and perspectives on things which are CANONICALLY CONFIRMED to be clear situations with lots of info about it#so of course people are going to go in like 80 different directions with his character#BECAUSE WE HAVE NEXT TO NOTHING TO GO OFF OF#and basically every interpretation of him I've seen is pretty reasonable#Like yeah man's son is a child spy who was abandoned in a far away country for the purpose of being a spy for Khaenri'ah's interests#thinking that he was an abusive asshole isn't exactly unreasonable#nor is it unreasonable to believe that he was actually a decent man who left his son in Mondstadt as the 'only hope' of Khaenri'ah#because he just wanted Kaeya to live on and have a life outside of the Abyss#and Kaeya was mistaken when he thought he was simply being left behind as a pawn#Genshin is no stranger to unreliable narrators and this wouldn't be the first time a character story wildly mischaracterizes something#so like...both of those interpretations are valid#and pretty fair ones as well#But I think that it really is like an Asgore situation where yeah this guy sucks and he is an awful person who made so many bad choices#But also was left with nothing BUT bad choices through war and grief and other factors that were genuinely outside of his control#Sacrifice your son's childhood and happiness by forcing him to be a child spy and abandoning him in the middle of a deadly storm#or let your people (including yourself) rot away into nothingness while facing a fate worse than death while they all but scream to be saved#there are no good options#kaeya's father#don't take this too seriously I just really liked Undertale when I was younger and I'm getting Asgore vibes from General Alberich
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for the ask game: LILAC CHARCOAL AND RASPBERRY
anon this is so sweet 😭
[ask game provided below for reference; if you'd like to play, please reblog from OP here:]
#anon i love this but i have a covenant with God so i can't kill Him with you#this reminds me of the time my brother lamented his atheism and my agnosticism on behalf of our religious mother. but i'm not agnostic.#so i clarified i believe in God and that's never changed. i just choose not to worship Him + I think there are multiple truths (incl. gods)#which is shorthand but I've never been able to explain it to others to their satisfaction and it isn't anyone else's business anyway#he thought that was MUCH worse and became so dramatic. he was genuinely so thrown. he fixated on the fact it's heresy.#which I didn't expect because like yes it's heresy but heresy is a doctrinal concept -- it doesn't have any intrinsic meaning.#and not to be dismissive but doctrine is fairly sequestered from God. It's functionally and historically a voidable social contract.#i was involved with the church/attended various bible retreats for several years before leaving. but I didn't leave over God lmao.#my institutional involvement was always contingent on its alignment with my own individual purpose/practice/rituals/bible study/covenant.#which church/community leadership knew and tried to triage in various ways but like. it's not hard to reject authority baselessly derived.#so my present relationship with God isn't any more heretical than it was when I practiced Christianity as a religion.#If anything I was maybe more heretical in funnier and more flagrant ways when I was practicing than I am now.#but anyway. my point is.#i wont help you kill god but I'm always here for heresy.#alternatively i also recommend either (1) listening to god is dead (meet the kids) by british india#which when engaged with meaningfully amounts to the same philosophical state of being as killing God#or (2) forming a reverse orphic mystery cult relationship with Him the way I did when from ages 10-14#in other words#we can either sacrifice God to the secular age like thomas jefferson and nietzsche#or we can obsessively study the bible @ the cost of enough sleep that we (in brief spurts) access the parts of us inclined towards prophecy#those are the only two approaches to god that I'm capable of partaking in with any sincerity or intellectual honesty#and I'm unfortunately very married to sincerity and intellectual honesty.#(i'm sorry for meeting your very nice compliments with a nonsequitur illustrating why i should live as a hermit in a remote woodland shack)#(but I suppose I'm not sorry enough to remove the nonsequitur from my response prior to publication. so. take from that what you will.)
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sits here thinking about all the fic ideas i have for my durge and isobel and punches a hole in the drywall because i have unmedicated Cant Focus Disorder
#dirge being the one who autopsied isobel and opened her tomb with gortash and kethetic.#dirge being forced to take a day off because of brain damage induced chronic migraines and staying at the elf song with isobel#while aylin and the gang keep on top of shit for the day. just quiet moments alone for them to talk to each other without the pressure#of being overheard#isobel talking to dirge about being a bhaalspawn. her experiences with an immortal god being#aylin being trapped and the unique vulnerabilities of being godspawn#isobel and dirge finding catharsis in their brutal resurrections into new life through each other. autopsy buddies.#isobel being Kind Of Weird and not entirely a saint because shes lost everything and everyone. and finally met a kindred soul who-#-understands what shes been through and she isnt willing to give that up even though hes a bhaalspawn murderer.#the willingness to be selfish because she cant stand to lose anything else when shes just starting to get it all back#isobel the light in the darkness. isobel the deathtouched maiden.#how loviatar says that the gods cant feel pain so she seeks it out through her worshippers so they can appreciate being alive#in spite of their mortality. a feeling a god can never have on their own#how isobel attracts the divine and unkillable and immortal#there is something so unabashedly human in how she lives and dies and lives again and how she suffers and lives and rejoices#and it draws them like moths to a light. she will never experience the bone deep satisfaction of doing what you were made for#because she wasnt MADE for ANYTHING she just LIVES. she just chooses.#aylin is always her mothers sword and dirge is always his fathers knifehand and isobel just is. invested with the soft light of the moon-#-because it radiates out from her anyways. gentle and without judgement it alights on them all#she just Is. human mortal kind gentle hypocritical and steadfast and they will never know what its like to be blessed without being claimed#like she never knows what its like to have such perfect divine purpose etched into your being and so they cant help but linger#god. fucking. isobel thorm#they watch trashy hallmark romcoms together btw. in my immaculate vision of bg3 which is totally accurate
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