#THIS ISN'T EVEN MY JOB
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Besties, let's please stop using and abusing the words "facilitated" and "leveraged" in your resumes because if I read another one riddled with them I will go absolutely feral
#whoever taught you to dress up your resume like this lied to you#you sound nonsensical#please I am trying to help but I want to gouge my eyes out#they tell me nothing of what you've actually done#and it just feels like you're lying/you don't know what your job was#esp if i see it 10+ times in a one pager#THIS ISN'T EVEN MY JOB#nara rambles#about work
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i refuse to believe that boycotting is hard. my favourite thing in the world is ordering maccies after a late night at work/a concert/getting drunk. yes i do miss it sometimes. but the other night i ordered from a small place near my house instead and it was the most orgasmic burger i've ever had in my life. i very rarely say this but fucking suck it up people are DEAD
#ramble#also only 0.29 delivery instead of 3.99#and chilli cheese bites#i swear to god the best food you'll ever eat while drunk is from the tiny shithole that's open until 4am#if you're refusing to do literally the smallest thing you can do to help then i have questions#it's FOOD. you'll survive#it's not even NECESSARY food#if it was like a chain grocery place and you don't have access to anything else then i would understand#but it's just NOT#make your own coffee for the love of god#when there is NOTHING you can do to stop this fucking tragedy. and let's be honest there isn't a lot normal people can do#and people say to you 'do this insignificant thing just to show that you even CARE'#and you DON'T do that???? what is actually wrong with you#also i've been worried about this since my last post about sbucks but this is Not an attack on the people who WORK at the boycotted places#because it is an absolute privilege to be able to leave your job and immediately find a new one
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Classic "promised-at-birth-to-the-Ghost-King" story, except the contract never states how, exactly, the King is to use the offered soul. Usually, one would be offered as a bride or sacrifice. But with Pariah Dark sealed away, his retainers got a little lazy in the last few millennia. They just made some generic contracts and practically handed them out like candy.
When Danny took over as king via conquest, that included all the weird and messed up soul contracts the previous retainers had signed. And since ghost magic was a thing and seemed to have it out for Danny personally, many of these contracts updated their terms and conditions as soon as that crown hit Danny's head, reflecting the new King's subconscious desires and personality.
This caused many issues with those still around to profit from these contracts. Some people lost their power, some gained more, and some were unbound and kicked to the curb. A few special people found themselves dropping dead after their less-than-ethical abilities disappeared.
Danny was unaware of the chaos he had unintentionally caused for quite a while. It was only brought to his attention when a letter arrived on his desk one day with a copy of someone's valid contract enclosed. The new changes have been highlighted, and a separate note is attached.
It seems that in exchange for blessings of near-immortality for her infant son, a mother had offered Pariah Dark both their souls in order to ensure her child's survival during harsh times. (The souls were to be collected upon death and were to be used as soldiers in the King's Army.) The mother's soul had returned to the Keep decades ago and was recently assigned to tend to the gardens, while her son seemed to have grown into a fine gentleman and was still alive. He used his mother's gifts to serve his country and loved ones well, it seemed.
At first, Danny didn't see what any of this had to do with him. If the mother was already a part of his kingdom, and the son would be eventually, why was a letter about the whole thing showing up before him?
Then he read the revised contract, which bore his magical signature. A signature that overruled the power of Pariah and binding it to him.
'...and as such, in return for the abilities stated above, [Mary Pennyworth] and [Alfred Pennyworth] will fulfill the conditions detailed below, upon pain of Ending.
[Mary Pennyworth], when returned to the Kingdom of Dark Kingdom of Stars, will work as a lieutenant in the Skeleton Army caretaker in the Gardens of Pluto.
STATUS: COMPLETED
[Alfred Pennyworth], when returned to the Kingdom of Dark Kingdom of Stars, will work as a general in the Skeleton Army caretaker of the King and his Court.
STATUS: PENDING'
Danny had to re-read the contract several times to understand what it was saying. He now had a caretaker? What did a caretaker do? Was it like a ghost parent? Could this guy ghost-ground him??
He sighed and pressed the speed dial on his phone for Tucker. Time to find out who the hell this Alfred Pennyworth guy was, and how to break a magic contract when it wasn't even fulfilled yet.
Meanwhile, Alfred had just found the original copy of the contract amongst his mother's belongings after it glowed and drew him in. The paperwork cleared up a lot of mysteries he'd always wondered about himself, even if he disapproved of his mother's methods. Nonetheless, he smoothed out the aged paper with dark green ink, noted the fresh (sloppy, a teenager?) signature, and began preparing to meet this supposed new King and his Court.
It wouldn't hurt to make introductions before he died, after all.
#pondhead blurbs#dpxdc#alfred is now their grandpa#i just want alfred to meet danny and his group of friends and unironically call him 'your majesty' and danny HATES it#like this is the guy who's gonna be my butler/caretaker after he dies? please man just say my name#it's not a cursed name i swear#no one else knows how to feel#cause like#if the contract wasn't in place everyone was sure Alfred would haunt the manor even after death due to his devotion to the wayne family#but now he's already got a job in the afterlife#so how will the bats see their father/grandfather figure now?#Bruce: the obvious solution is to adopt these random kids who still have families so alfred never has to leave :)#alfred isn't even dead yet but the bats are speedrunning their grief in like a week
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*tries to organize my thoughts*
*remembers i'm not in school and therefore beholden to neither heaven nor hell nor any man's grading system*
*joyously shredding & tossing all my carefully arranged 3x5 mental notecards into the air like so much beige confetti. raising my arms in victory, cheering raucously until i accidentally inhale bits of homemade confetti*
(*coughing up itty bits of paper like a cat evicting a hairball with a firm understanding of tenants' rights*) wait wat happens next
#i marie kondoed my thoughts and *i* feel great. but now my stream-of-consciousness has escaped containment#so many innocent bystanders at stake#every time i try to organize my thoughts i run out of plastic bins and have to make a trip to the container store where i get even more dis#racted so. you can't just hand me THIS brain and NO catalogue OR library classification system#and expect me to single-handedly sort through all this nonsense? bad form but fucking form not in my job description#aNYways. formal education sure did a FUCKING NUMBER on us huh#(a number i measure not in gpa or dollars of student debt.#but in the number of therapy sessions & medical debt it will take to recover.)#seriously folks. our education systems are...innately traumatizing for a huge number of students. and we NEED to address this.#the fact that it is culturally common for adults to have anxiety nightmares about school/exams...even decades later?#that is not cute. it is Alarming.#no one--much less entire generations--should be spending their developmental years in an environment of chronic stress & pressure & strain#and yet that is the reality for millions and millions of pre-teen and teenage and young adult students#this isn't healthy and it serves and empowers NO ONE#...except of course the many exploitative educational & financial & debt-collecting institutions thriving from the current balance of power#and of course it's a nefarious and powerful way to sabotage/erase the middle class#which billionaires and the wealth-inequality creators they finance couldn't possibly have any noteworthy interest in whatsoever#it's not like there's an elite group of people with huge financial incentives to drain/steal resources from the masses...#anyways sorry for going all Conspiracy Theory on you.#obviously the billionaires who control the vast majority of our resources and news and political campaign funding#are not tied to every single itty bitty social issue and i'm a silly billy to imply it#please tell elon musk to ignore this tweet i am so subservient and acquiescent#mr musky u r so good at inheriting slavery-built mining fortunes & buying other people's companies#& building rocket ships & fancy cars that do NOT explode/catch fire & also NOT running billion dollar companies into the ground#mr musky u r so talented genius billionaire playboy with 10 kids and ex-wives who find you creepy af babe u r basically iron man
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Okay, so I have read a lot of fics where Dogma joins the Coruscant Guard post-Umbara as a way to protect him, or he joins the Guard because the 501st doesn't like him, but I have a new CG Dogma AU concept.
Rex sends Dogma to the Guard specifically to look after Fox. He KNOWS Fox is overworked and the Guard is understaffed, but Fox just isn't asking for help as much as Rex would like, so he sends Dogma over because if Rex can't be there to look after Fox himself, he might as well as send the next best thing. Dogma is a little skeptical about it at first, but Rex tells him that he is legitimately the best man for the job specifically BECAUSE of his personality (he's got reason to believe Fox will have a soft spot for someone who reminds him of Rex).
He tells Fox that this is something he and Dogma discussed because the kind of work the Guard does is a better match for Dogma, but that he's also one of Rex's most impressive soldiers. Fox sees right through Rex and is not impressed at being assigned a babysitter, especially not some barely-not-a-shiny sergeant from the 501st. It's almost insulting, but the paperwork has already gone through so he can't say no or just send Dogma back.
But Rex knew what he was doing and Dogma IS a lot like Rex and he thrives in the Guard and it turns out he gets along incredibly well with Fox and, due to some special insider info from Rex, is perfectly capable of helping keep an eye on his new Commander.
#star wars#clone trooper dogma#captain rex#commander fox#this is a fox/rex au for me#but theoretically it could just be like a really close friendship or sibling bond if you really can't handle cloneshipping#but yeah basically rex (and most of the other commanders) are PERFECTLY aware that the guard is a difficult job#it's just different from theirs#but they don't all do the exact same job either#some of them are really frontline battalions while others are more rescue/aid based and others might be more recon#none of them are more or less difficult than the others and the guard is included in that#the reason rex has to take initiative in sending fox some help even tho he knows fox needs it#is because fox KNEW rex wouldn't just send him regular soldiers#he KNEW rex would be weird and overprotective about it if he asked for extra men or something#so he asked literally everyone BUT rex which means of course rex KNOWS fox needs men even if he isn't being asked directly#that may or may not encourage him to do what he does afterward by sending dogma to fox#'you didn't want my help asshole? well here have a mini me then'
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Rebecca: your son-
Wanda: why is he only my son when he does stupid shit?
#rebecca kaplan#wanda maximoff#they definitely talk to each other#why does fandom try and pit them angenst each other?#billy maximoff#billy kaplan#william maximoff#william kaplan#billy: *freezes from where he is* something is wrong#wiccan#comics#marvel comics#do you think they compared notes? cus id just have to know. like those odd things did he get that from you? or is that him#then hc that billy and tommy did like twin things even though they weren't reborn as twins.#their are twins who were separated at birth irl and some had the same habits or some had the same job like they're similar even though they#didnt grow up together.#id add tommys mom to this but 💀 from what we can infer (cus they won't write tommy story lines) she wasn't great#marvel#the scarlet witch#*against its 2am my spelling is atrocious#this isn't a ship they're both his moms but not in a wlw way but in a convoluted comic way
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thinking abt Hotguy and Cuteguy, but Grian is an angel who has to keep reviving Scar
#my grian design is already an angel#grian isn't even worried or anything in a fight hes like SCAR SOTP DYING#scars like well why dont you do it mister ??!? . grian looks away. ''Not my job.''
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ngl despite how much I love art that follows awful people in bad situations, I think my favourite theme in mouthwashing has gotta be the ways in which blue collar jobs not only involve intense amounts of physical labour but also mental and emotional labour, especially in the face of an uncaring and supposedly familial corporate sheen. like it's surface level, but it's good and it's real.
#my posts#like I know somebody who used to work on freight ships and even with unions there's just an attitude of 'get your job done'#and in mouthwashing I genuinely love how the pony express branding and policies and promises underline everything that happens on the ship#like it really isn't just set dressing#even if it's a surface level theme I just genuinely really like it#you can believe this ship is real because the specificity of the company and the ship itself just screams an actual fucking old ass freight
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Something something just because the dog isn't flashy doesn't mean it's not driven. Just because it's not screaming doesn't mean it's not in drive.
Just because the dog is best suited for trailing, locating, and flushing game and thus rarely gets to participate in killing game, doesn't make it less important than the team members who are better at killing. The killing might be the flashiest and most exciting part, but it isn't the most important part. The dogs that kill won't be able to do that if the dogs that flush don't put the game into the position to be killed.
Grumbly venting brought to you a conversation with someone who thinks the actual kill is the most important part of hunting. And who thinks that only badass, hardcore, drivey, screamy dogs that murder are good hunting dogs.
#random things that irk me#hunting#to be clear I am not even a hunter#sometimes I hunt with my dog#but I am not a hunter#I do not live that lifestyle#but I still go out and put up rats and rabbits both alone and with friends#I put in the work#so it is annoying for someone who does not put in that work#to obliquely put my dog down because he is better suited for flushing than killing#and he doesn't have the flashiness of a terrier#he is very workmanlike and not exciting to watch#but he gets the job done#it does not make him a less important team member#than the flashy terriers who kill the game he drives into their mouths#also this isn't about anyone online#it's an irl person I had a convo with
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a lesson on good karma digimon survive week 2024 day 4: supporting characters
#digimon#gomamon#digimon survive#survive week#survive week 2024#rambling ahead. you don't have to read the tags beyond bc there's nothing that important tbh... you can just look at the art...#exhausted from being out and doing housework yesterday. then got a last-minute job with very urgent deadline today#finished everything but yeah basically i did anything but art so#irl do be like that aint it#anyway it's been a long time since i played survive and my memory isn't that good#but i always remember the part where we had to protect the gomamon#and later they showed us a path via the dam allowing the team to continue exploring#it reminded me of just how important it is to be nice and do good things whenever and wherever possible#and be mindful with the not-so-good things you do and say#be it good or bad. karma is real even if you don't know when it will get back at you#and you know in visual novel settings. whatever choice you make really determines what happens later on#yeah believe it or not i end up thinking stuff like that by helping a bunch of adorable seal mons...#mmm i'm officially behind now so i might as well take my time while also rest a bit haha ;;#this week has been fun with survive week tho fr. even though i came in unprepared (when will i change)#gotta keep surviving#png
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i think i got blessed by the cosplay gods again because i was looking for fake leather for some armour and i managed to find 2 identical xl leather jackets AND a tablecloth in the exact right colour
#ramble#cosplay#i actually hope i find another jacket bc one of them is really nice and i might keep it asdjfdhd#would recommend thrifting for cosplay fabric bc it ends up being £10 of material vs £50+++#my isobel coat is also made of a tablecloth :3#i didn't want to buy a roll of fake leather bc it's too expensive for my first time making leather armour lmao#i know fake leather is plastic but i would rather make something than have them go in the bin y'know#this isn't even for next week this is for mcm in may bc i'm starting my job soon and i will have No free time
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actually i'm still thinking about the moral orel finale.
he has a cross on his wall. do you know how much i think about that bc it's a lot.
a lot of stories ((auto)biographical or fictional) centering escape from abusive/fundamentalist christianity result in the lead characters leaving behind christianity entirely. and that makes complete sense! people often grow disillusioned with the associated systems and beliefs, and when it was something used to hurt them or something so inseparable from their abuse that they can't engage with it without hurting, it makes total sense that they would disengage entirely. and sometimes they just figure out that they don't really believe in god/a christian god/etc. a healthy deconstruction process can sometimes look like becoming an atheist or converting to another religion. it's all case by case. (note: i'm sure this happens with other religions as well, i'm just most familiar with christian versions of this phenomenon).
but in orel's case, his faith was one of the few things that actually brought him comfort and joy. he loved god, y'know? genuinely. and he felt loved by god and supported by him when he had no one else. and the abuses he faced were in how the people in his life twisted religion to control others, to run away from themselves, to shield them from others, etc. and often, orel's conflicts with how they acted out christianity come as a direct result of his purer understanding of god/jesus/whatever ("aren't we supposed to be like this/do that?" met with an adult's excuse for their own behavior or the fastest way they could think of to get orel to leave them alone (i.e. orel saying i thought we weren't supposed to lie? and clay saying uhhh it doesn't count if you're lying to yourself)). the little guy played catch with god instead of his dad, like.. his faith was real, and his love was real. and i think it's a good choice to have orel maintain something that was so important to him and such a grounding, comforting force in the midst of. All That Stuff Moralton Was Up To/Put Him Through. being all about jesus was not the problem, in orel's case.
and i know i'm mostly assuming that orel ended up in a healthier, less rigid version of christianity, but i feel like that's something that was hinted at a lot through the series, that that's the direction he'd go. when he meditates during the prayer bee and accepts stephanie's different way to communicate, incorporating elements of buddhism into his faith; when he has his I AM A CHURCH breakdown (removing himself from the institution and realizing he can be like,, the center of his own faith? taking a more individualistic approach? but Truly Going Through It at the same time), his acceptance (...sometimes) of those who are different from him and condemned by the adults of moralton (stephanie (lesbian icon stephanie my beloved), christina (who's like. just a slightly different form of fundie protestant from him), dr chosenberg (the jewish doctor from otherton in holy visage)). his track record on this isn't perfect, but it gets better as orel starts maturing and picking up on what an absolute shitfest moralton is. it's all ways of questioning the things he's been taught, and it makes sense that it would lead to a bigger questioning as he puts those pieces together more. anyway i think part of his growth is weeding out all the lost commandments of his upbringing and focusing on what faith means to him, and what he thinks it should mean. how he wants to see the world and how he wants to treat people and what he thinks is okay and right, and looking to religion for guidance in that, not as like. a way to justify hurting those he's afraid or resentful of, as his role models did.
he's coming to his own conclusions rather than obediently, unquestioningly taking in what others say. but he's still listening to pick out the parts that make sense to him. (edit/note: and it's his compassion and his faith that are the primary motivations for this questioning and revisal process, both of individual cases and, eventually, the final boss that is christianity.) it makes perfect sense as the conclusion to his character arc and it fits the overall approach of the show far better. it's good is what i'm saying.
and i think it's important to show that kind of ending, because that's a pretty common and equally valid result of deconstruction. and i think it cements the show's treatment of christianity as something that's often (and maybe even easily) exploited, but not something inherently bad. something that can be very positive, even. guys he even has a dog he's not afraid of loving anymore. he's not afraid of loving anyone more than jesus and i don't think it's because he loves this dog less than bartholomew (though he was probably far more desperate for healthy affection and companionship when he was younger). i think it's because he figures god would want him to love that dog. he's choosing to believe that god would want him to love and to be happy and to be kind. he's not afraid of loving in the wrong way do you know how cool that is he's taking back control he's taking back something he loves from his abusers im so normal
#i had a really big fundie snark phase a year or two ago so that's part of like. this. but im still not used to actually talking about#religious stuff so if it reads kinda awkwardly uhh forgive me orz idk#maybe it sounds dumb but i like that the message isn't 'religion is evil'. it easily could have been. but i think the show's points about#how fundie wasp culture in particular treats christianity and itself and others would be less poignant if they were like. and jesus sucks#btw >:] like. this feels more nuanced to me. i guess there's probably a way to maintain that nuance with an ultimately anti-christian#piece of media but i think it'd be like. wayy harder and it's difficult for me to imagine that bc i think a lot of it would bleed out into#the tone. + why focus on only These christians when They're All also bad? so you'd get jokes about them in general#and i think that's kinda less funny than orel and doughy screaming and running from catholics lsdkjfldksj#i think the specificity makes it more unique and compelling as comedy and as commentary. but that's just me#like moralton represents a very particular kind of christian community (namely a middle class fundie wasp nest)#you're not gonna be able to get in the weeds as much if you're laughing at/criticizing all christians. but they accomplish it so thoroughly#and WELL in morel and i think that's because it chose a smaller target it can get to dissect more intimately. anyway#moral orel#orel puppington#(OH also when i say wasp here i mean WASP the acronym. as in white anglo-saxon protestsant. in case the term's new to anyone <3)#maybe it's also relevant to say that i'm kindaaaaaaaa loosely vaguely nonspecifically christian. so there's my bias revealed#i was never raised like orel but i like to think i get some of what's going on in there y'know. in that big autistic head of his#but it's not like i can't handle anti-christian/anti-religious media/takes. i'm a big boy and also i v much get why it's out there yknow#christianity in specific has a lot of blood on its hands from its own members and from outsiders and people have a right to hate it for tha#but religion in all its forms can be positive and i appreciate the nuance. like i've said around 20 times. yeah :) <3#(<- fighting for my life to explain things even though my one job is to be the explainer)
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sorry if i'm late! 🔥 Cytherea
Oh now here's something I DO have a controversial opinion about, which is that I do not like her one bit and it's not for the reasons people commonly list! in this series, everyone's committed a few murders and creeped on someone in a necromantic fashion. Those weren't my favorite houses anyway. rip but I didn't have much time to get attached. I have a lot of sympathy for anyone living in pain that long and having to speak to john gaius the whole time--or at least I would, if her personality wasn't specifically calculated to irritate me!!
I even understand her relevance to the plot and themes and theoretically I get the appeal of gideon/ cythere a. But every time she spoke to gideon I found myself vaguely annoyed wishing we could get back to other characters. I simply have a petty hatred that cannot be overcome. omg shut UP about Gideon's biceps. stop batting those eyelashes it looks stupid. "pretend I'm five and explain it to me" GOD could she be trying any harder. couldn't even get a personality of her own had to steal one from poor dulcie and didn't even do it right. cytherea hate club sorry
#one of my pettiest tlt opinions because i can see that logically there is no reason to feel so strongly about this#i see the appeal of an evil cougar! i do! just not that one!#replies#it's quite a southern type of false sweetness isn't it#never got along with this type of woman even when she wasn't trying to get me fired#at my many customer service jobs
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idk why people are so obsessed with writing a book within a timeline. like all the blogs/accounts/whatever are so focused on "how to write a book in a year" or "finish your editing in 3 months" nah bro. i'm going to take 10 years to finish one book, actually. because i have a day job and probably 20 minutes to write a day.
#sam rambles#why are we so focused on productivity when it comes to creativity??#for me if i just focus on goals or time related objectives it actually crushes my creativity#like i get it if it's your job 10000% and you have deadlines#but for most people writing isn't going to even come close to paying the bills so we have other things to do in the day to like. survive#why are we so worried about how quickly it's gonna take us to finish something??
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you know when you're going through a high stress situation that is prolonged and agonizing but you've put on a brave face and you think you've got this! 💪 and then a week into it you accidentally burn your quinoa and there's smoke and all of a sudden your skin is sloughing off and you feel like alice about to be swept away in a tide of her own tears? mmnnmm yeag.
#i cant fucking do this not at all actually im very scared and i have no idea what im gonna ddo for money and yeah i am. so scared#money isn't even scary if i can just find a job! but i need an apartment but i can't find an apartment unless i can pay for the rent#and i have to contact The Dude at some point but uh. hes mad. im scared.#augh delete later probably. im sitting on the stairs outside and smoking a cigarette which i really shouldn't do#did I tell you i was scared. i have these cruel nightmares of roaming the streets looking for nala and not finding her#and i wake up in a cold sweat in a panic not knowing where i am. everything is so unfamiliar !!!!#if things ever work out for me if i can find the money for deposit or get my investments back somehow i swear i will spend a month in compl#ete silence staring at the cieling just processing this#right now everything feels so GO GO GO and i am scared it might break me. i do not have the time for chronic ilness right now yk.#tummy ache. chewing on my cheek.#nothing to do than try to stay positive but man. this really fucking sucks and is really unfair#who knew being a people pleaser with 0 boundaries would come back to bite me in the ass.#/groan/
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