#THIS IS ACTUALLY VERY ACCURATE TO WHAT ITS LIKE FOR THEM

[cheapshrimpysheep]

Dancing with Yuutsum

SUMMARY: What would happen if you and your tsum found Vil’s, Idia’s and Malleus’s tsums dancing together in the Courtyard? You discover that Idia-tsum is very clingy with your tsum, Vil-tsum gets upset pretending that it doesn't bother it, and worse, Malleus-tsum is openly jealous.

CHARACTERS: Vil Schoenheit, Vil’s tsum; Idia’s tsum, Malleus’s tsum (+Epel Felmier; Ortho Shroud; Sebek Zigvolt) And Malleus at the end.

TAGS: Fluff; GN Reader

WORD COUNT: 1.600 words

COMMENTS: I got this idea while playing Twisted Tsumderland 3. After having written so much about Yuutsum I immediately had an idea to use this twistune.

Maybe the title is not quite accurate because most of it is not about the dance but it was the name of the twistune. 😅

I hope you enjoy ❤️

Cooking with Yuutsum - Azul Ashengrotto, Azul’s tsum; Kalim Al-Asim, Kalim’s tsum (+Floyd Leech, Jamil Viper)

Your tsum seemed curious about its surroundings and you asked it if it wanted to go for a walk so you could show it around the school campus. Your tsum happily and enthusiastically agreed.

During your tour you couldn't help but pass by the Courtyard where you hear music. Curious, you follow it and see Epel, Ortho and Sebek dancing with Idia’s, Vil’s and Malleus’s tsums. Vil and Idia's tablet were also there watching them.

Your Tsum moved happily in your arms and seemed to want to join them, but you arrived when they were already at the end of the dance. Your Tsum felt a little sad and you tried to cheer it up by saying that even if they don't dance more it can still go to greet them. Your tsum does so and jumped out of your arms to hop over to the other tsums.

“It can't be helped.” Vil sighed. “You and my peanut were fine Epel, but the others continued dancing as clumsy as they pleased.”

“Hm? Something is approaching with little hops. Another tsum?” Idia's voice says through the tablet. “Damn, my tsum is really unlucky today. Whee hee hee. I'm so glad I sent my tablet instead of going out in person. Whose will it be this-”

Your tsum finally gets close enough for everyone, including Idia's tablet camera, to see it and it greets everyone with that happy tsum sound.

Before any other person or tsum could greet it back, Idia-tsum jumped straight at your tsum to hug it, but with an expression as if asking for its protection.

“W-W-WHAT IS IT DOING?!” Idia asks in an embarrassed panic.

“I don't know.” Ortho responds, curious. “But it seems like it's nesting in (Y/N)'s tsum. It's actually cute.”

You, already next to your and Idia’s tsums, open your mouth to ask yourself the same thing when the sky suddenly turns dark. You all look up and see storm clouds that appeared out of nowhere when the sky was clear seconds ago.

“My Tsum-liege! What's wrong?”

You all look back at the ground, at Malleus-tsum who is glaring angrily at the two tsums at your feet. A muffled thunder is heard and Idia-tsum only hugs your tsum even tighter in fear, which makes Malleus-tsum even more angry and a lightning bolt strikes nearby.

Your tsum looks at you, nods with its little head to Idia-tsum and then to Malleus-tsum. You understand what it wants to ask you and you bend down to pick up Idia-tsum. It gets scared when it feels hands suddenly catch it and doesn't want to let go of your tsum, until it calms Idia-tsum enough to free itself from its grip. Only when Idia-tsum realizes that you are the one holding it does it stop trying to escape and nestles into your arms in fear so that you can protect it.

Meanwhile your tsum hops to Malleus-tsum. As your tsum gets closer to it the clouds begin to disappear. Until Sebek suddenly gets between the two tsums.

“HALT! No one can approach my tsum-liege without permis-” Another bolt of lightning struck nearby. Sebek looked at Malleus-tsum who was looking at him with displeasure. “AH! MY DEEPEST APOLOGIES MY TSUM-LIEGE!” He bowed deeply. “I was unaware this tsum had your consent.” And he got out of the way.

Malleus-tsum raised its head with dignity and walked the remaining short distance to your tsum. Once in front of your tsum, Malleus-tsum didn't hug it, it waited for your tsum to do it first. And it did, touching its cheek to Malleus-tsum’s and rubbing affectionately. It was a matter of a couple of seconds before the storm clouds dissipated as quickly as they had appeared.

“Hum... Am I the only one who thinks this is some kind of subliminal message or foreshadowing or something?” Idia questions.

“What? You don't think just because these peanuts have physical similarities to us that they are revealing something hidden about us, do you?” Vil counterposes with a sarcastic smile.

“Where are you going?” Epel asks Vil-tsum who started walking down the gray path away from them, with its head held high and his eyes closed as if it was upset but still prideful.

Your tsum looks at it and gives Malleus-tsum a kiss before hoping towards Vil-tsum and stopping right in front of it. Your tsum made a happy tsum sound, but Vil-tsum turned its face away and continued walking after going around your tsum.

“Someone got sulky.” Idia commented in a low voice and chuckled to himself.

Meanwhile, Malleus-tsum came to you, stopped for a moment to look at you, and then suddenly jumped into your arms as well. This startled Idia-tsum again, but Malleus-tsum patted it to let it know that everything was okay, and the two of them snuggled up to you.

Your tsum tried to get closer to Vil-tsum again, but it kept looking away. Until your tsum starts making a sound and a face like it wanted to cry. Only then did Vil-tsum finally look at it, but was still sulking. Your tsum slowly got closer to it and touched its little nose with Vil-tsum's. Seeing that it didn't move away again, your tsum slowly snuggled into it, as if it was apologizing. Vil-tsum finally gives in and accepts the apology, returning the affection.

“Does your tsum have any special powers or is there something else you want to tell us about all of this?” Epel asks you with a mocking smile.

“This is ridiculous.” Vil claps his hands twice and his tsum looks at him. “Let's go, peanut. It's time to go back to Pomefiore. Unlike you, I have a schedule to keep.”

Vil-tsum looked at your tsum, then at you and quickly hopped towards you until it gave one last jump that ended with it on top of your head.

“Are you disobeying me?” Vil seemed to really start to get upset. “After everything you did to my beauty products and my patience, you still have the nerve to-” He was surprised by your tsum suddenly jumping into his arms. He stopped talking to concentrate on catching it.

He looked at your tsum who smiled at him with its little eyes. The corner of his mouth seemed to form a small smile. Then your tsum jumped onto his shoulder.

“And what do you think you're doing?” Vil asked, letting slip in his tone of voice that he was found it a little amusing. Your tsum began to rub its little face against Vil's cheek. “Hey, be careful with the makeup. My products are durable, but if you rub too hard you'll smudge it and get yourself dirty.” Vil picked up your tsum and took it off his shoulder. It looked slightly sad and disappointed, but Vil smiled and kissed it on the forehead and your tsum made that happy sound again.

“Are you still glad that you stayed in your room, big brother?” Ortho asked the tablet. “Your tsum looks very happy in (Y/N)'s arms. And that adorable mini version of them could be snuggling up to you instead of Vil Schoenheit.”

“I had to be delusionally full of myself to think that someone or something would choose me over a hot supermodel.” Idia said in that sullen, giving-up voice.

“Hmm... a little help...?” You asked, holding a tsum in each arm and letting another balance on top of your head.

The only way to make the tsum leave you alone was to promise that you and your tsum would later stop by each of their dorms. That and dance with them before you leave since your tsum was unable to participate in the dance they had done before.

Idia-tsum was the only one who didn't seem very happy with the idea, but you and your tsum managed to convince it, because now it would have the opportunity to dance with you and your tsum. But even so, it only did that for the two of you.

All the tsums wanted to dance with you and/or your tsum, besides Epel, Ortho and Sebek (although the latter didn't want to admit it) also wanted to dance with your tsum. So you ended up doing a dance with partner swapping so everyone has the opportunity to dance with both of you.

After the dance the hardest one to convince to leave you and your tsum to continue the walk was Idia-tsum. It didn't want to be separated from the two of you, especially your tsum.

“Come on Tsum-shi, this is starting to get cringe.” Idia asked it.

The other two tsums went their separate ways but not without giving you and your tsum one last kiss on the cheek. Or what resembled a kiss since tsums don't have mouths.

After leaving with his tsum-liege and meeting Malleus again, Sebek told him that your tsum had come to greet his tsum and the others. If he doesn't tell many details of what happened, Malleus will only feel sorry for having been separated from them and not being able to be present at that moment, but he will be happy that his tsum could meet yours.

But if Sebek makes the mistake of telling him about your tsum's interactions with the other tsums and especially with Vil, he'll have to apologize so to stop the thunderstorm that had begun to form above them.

As you would visit them in Diasomnia later, he waited to see the interaction between your tsums and satisfied with what he witnessed he did not touch on the subject of what happened with Vil and the other tsums.

More Twisted Tsumderland content:

Yuutsum 1 (Riddle; Cater; Leona; Jack; Floyd; Epel; Sebek)

Yuutsum 2 (Deuce; Azul; Jade; Kalim; Rook; Ortho; Lilia)

Yuutsum 3 (Ace; Trey; Ruggie; Jamil; Vil; Idia; Malleus; Silver)

If you would like to read more from me, you can find it in my pinned post: INDEX

[thealogie]

Something you won’t read in any article published (to this day) about why mexicans hate emilia pérez so much is this:

Mexicans, as an audience, are actually very forgiving. We’re not that given to taking offense over most things, not even stereotypes. You’ll actually find people who defend Speedy Gonzalez and Sombrero Mario, we do know how to laugh at stuff: as long as there’s a modicum of respect involved.

We actually like Nacho Libre (despite its white main actor), Coco (despite the whole trying-to-copyright-the-dia-de-muertos-name and stealing the likeness of a real woman without crediting her or paying her in any way) and the opening scene of that James Bond movie (despite it not being accurate in the least, my mum is even disappointed that she missed the call to be an extra in the movie). As long as there’s some respect, admiration, curiosity, and at least a bit of research, we’ll take mexican representation in good faith. Or we’ll mock it if it’s bad, but we’ll rarely hate it outright.

And so, having the director publicly state that he didn’t need to research anything about México bc he already knew what he needed to know, the cast director say that they hired non-mexican actresses bc they couldn’t find any mexican actors who could portray their mexican characters with authenticity, their lead actress lashing out at the spanish-speaking audience calling them ignorant and transphobic for saying the movie is bad, the director and main actress backing out from an Q&A showing in Mexico (which was to be attended by students from my former university) and sending the only Mexican actress (who has been largely absent from their press tour) to face the public alone. Well it’s more than clear that this white french guy has zero respect and zero curiosity for the country that he decided to portray, and that in turn makes it clear that he’s only using Mexico as a wild and savage setting for his stupid oscar-bait movie all in the middle of a Trump second term where they keep painting Mexico as the enemy and more than want any reason to invade us. And to add insult to injury he’s getting Awards for it and is posed to win fucking Best Movie when it’s not even good as a movie.

What is not to hate about this whole shitshow.

Very well-explained! Thank you.

[prettyboykatsuki]

begging you to talk about mr. fake vanilla’s kinks, then!! 🙏

this is the only one i feel possible of feeling confident in.

i really do think zayne is a very vanilla man. he is not especially ashamed about it either. he just wants you to experience pleasure and wants to not embarass himself in anyway. he's a fan of indulging you

so a lot of his actual kinks do not exist before he meets u. u kind of shape his tastes as you date. BUT .... i do think he probably has some random stuff that really gets him going whether or not he feels comfy admitting it sdkjhjfs

alas i do think he's into feet. specifically into like... heels and seeing you get pedicures and stuff. he knows you work hard but there's something about seeing them well taken care of like when you're on a break that does unfortunately get him rock hard especially when he's got them in your lap. i dont think they go in his mouth often but he does kiss them and rub them frequently

im going to say femdom but i promise this is NOT bias KJSDJF. i literally want to be that mans lapdog for once. i just think he has a pretty strong sense of restraint and he enjoys releasing it

aside from that................. i say i think he has a breeding kink and it is not Untrue . but i think it's more accurate he kind of in a very guilty subconscious lust towards barebacking and risk. its less about family making and more about you being so desperate to feel him cum in you when he absolutely should not. this is buried deep in his psyche and it takes you several years of dating to pierce it together.

likes some light bondage. like specifically using his ties to tie your hands. nothing too extreme or he'll worry abt hurting you </3 rip for m's everywhere

bit of a voyeur. likes just watching you get off or masturbate or when you use his thigh or smth to get yourself off. finds it arousing and also kind of cute when you act extremely desperate around him

he really is simple and pretty vanilla tho in my mind. and extremely weak to being seduced in any form.

i think you SPECIFICALLY mold a lot of his tastes. he likes you and by extension likes what you like and sometimes does his own research if he can manage to not be completely embarrassed by it. he is not happy perse if u have more experience than him but also its kind of nice to have your guidance if you're into anything hardcore.

i do think genuinely he probably refuses anything excessively degrading or degrading at all. hes pretty quiet in bed. he can do stuff that's light but he's very playful and indulgent with mc but he just will not engage in that even in a mild way he is too lovey dovey for degradation. u must understand i would easily let him call me a mutt btw so again. not bias just how it seems to me

he is . MILDLY an exhibitionist. not anywhere with real risk of getting caught but like. fucking in the office or in the car cause you cant quite keep your hands on him.

also. i think he's into petplay but he is never going to uncover this without dating someone whose into it first if that makes any sense at all.

but yeah he does almost anything you want him to within reason. and any position that requires some kind of indulging you are his favorites. big on body worship and eye contact

[chukleberryink]

Love me softly, for tender is my heart

Also posted on AO3!!

______________________________________________________________

Soft. 

Not a word to be used when describing Simon Riley. He was “The Ghost”- an unshakable force, a get-it-done-no-questions-asked type of man. A good soldier, a damn good lieutenant, and lethal in every single sense of the word. Skilled with a knife the same way an artist is with their paintbrush, with a gun like a poet to their words. The number of lives he’s ended without so much as blinking an eye speaks to this in not as many words, he knows this.

So no, Simon would never describe himself as soft.

But maybe, like this, he could be. Languidly curled around Johnny, watching the slow rise and fall of his chest as he slept. Protecting him from the dangers of the world they face, the world that the two of them willingly and eagerly throw themselves into every day for the safety of the “free world,” if you could even call it that.

It should be noted that John Mactavish isn’t a soft man either, he kills as often as Ghost does nowadays, and a demolitions expert and a sniper are not the makings of such a man. And it's funny, Simon thinks, that he deals with both blasts and camouflage. But it so very accurately reflects Johnny as a person. Loud and quiet, observant and audacious, flexible and yet bull-headed. When Simon first met him, in Las Almas, he got a taste of that, but it's only been enforced since. The man that by all accounts is a walking contradiction, an oxymoron, is the one that he fell so deeply in love with.

Love. 

An emotion that Simon thought had been beaten out of him. Even disregarding his father, Roba, all of it, years in the service seemed to kill whatever was left. A bullet between its eyes, unflinching- that's what his world does to love. But Simon has to admit, there isn’t a better word for how he feels about Johnny. Because there isn’t much he wouldn’t do if Johnny asked him to. And yeah, that scared the ever loving shit out of him, but it also was the best feeling in the world. He completely adores the man sleeping next to him, understands him in a way that “no one else could,” to quote soap himself. And Simon knew the feeling was mutual, which is honestly why he didn’t run away with his tail tucked between his legs when all of this started. The knowledge that all of this was reciprocated is what made him stay.

True to his callsign, before Soap, he had felt like a phantom in this world. Nothing to tie him down except for the mission, no real place to call home (except for the shitty apartment he bought in London when he was forced to take mandated leave). It was easy for him to get lost in the title, to embrace it completely. 

Then Las Almas happened. He didn't know if it was the sting of betrayal that caused him to stick by Johnny or the sense of comradery, but Ghost knew it was then that they clicked. 

(If Simon ever found it in himself to be honest he’d admit that it was earlier, a couple of days after they first met. Johnny was a competent soldier and not shitty company.)

But regardless of the circumstances that got them here, the important part was that they were. Here. Together. Even though Simon was used to betrayal, thinking about it always hurt in ways he couldn’t describe, so he made a conscious effort to be in the now. 

He refocused his attention back to the man beside him. One of his favorite things to do was watch Johnny sleep, as creepy as that sounds. But the peaceful, quiet breaths, the occasional flutter of his eyes as he went through REM- it reminded Simon that he was safe. That they both were. That, despite it all, they were still kicking. 

(They didn’t have a name for this. Partner would be the closest thing- boyfriend felt too juvenile for a lieutenant and a sergeant serving in a secret task force.)

Johnny’s hair was getting long. Not the sides, never the sides, but the actual mohawk itself was getting unruly, going down to the base of his neck. Not regulations by any means, but the 141 didn’t really do things by the book. Like, for example, Price knew about their relationship but didn’t care, and that sure as hell didn’t fit into fraternization regs.

(If Johnny asked, Simon would marry him. In a heartbeat. He’s thinking of asking him anyway, eventually. It doesn’t have to be anything big, it could be just for them. Or they could do the whole nine yards, a big wedding, with Gaz and Price and Laswell and anyone else who wanted to be there, if that’s what Johnny wanted. He’d do the cheesy scottish traditions, indulge in the handfasting. Anything.

Anything.)

Simon moves closer to Johnny, feeling very sappy. Fuck, he loves him so much. He runs his hand through his hair, careful not to wake him. They had a rough op, nothing too bad but it left both of them exhausted. Johnny needed as much sleep as he could get, as he typically has a difficult time falling asleep during downtimes on missions (Ghost thinks it's because of Las Almas). 

He checks the alarm clock on the nightstand, 12:23 blinking back at him wearily. It's time to try and go to sleep, and he figures that the adrenaline has worn off enough. He throws an arm over Johnny, stares at the side of his head for a moment longer, content to just admire, then feels his eyes drift shut.

Simon (predictably, as right after a mission he's always high strung) shifts between hazy consciousness and sleep. He continues to do so for about an hour until he feels the arm covering Soap move. He’s alert now, monitoring Johnny’s every movement. 

He isn’t sitting up, but his breathing has shifted from distinctly asleep to distinctly awake. And he's breathing kind of harshly, like he had been woken up from a particularly unsettling dream. Which is probably true. Neither one of them are strangers to nightmares, or even odd dreams. It comes with the line of work. And when they do have these dreams, the reaction isn’t always violent. (Sometimes it is. Sometimes, it ends up with Ghost on the floor with Soap's arm pressed firmly into his neck, eyes glossed over and unseeing. Or, with Ghost clocking Soap’s jaw, trying to get away from an imaginary attacker). 

But other times it's this. It's groggily sitting up (he's sitting now), breaths coming out in quick succession. 

Simon feigns sleep, not wanting to embarrass Johnny. It isn’t anything to be embarrassed about, but sometimes Johnny doesn’t feel that way towards himself. He knows that if Soap needs him, he’ll wake him.

He can feel eyes boring into him, probably monitoring Simon’s breaths, closely mirroring the scene from earlier tonight.

He hears Johnny shift closer to him, feels the pressure of his head next to him.  He must have laid down again. It’s silent for a minute, like he’s holding his breath, then he lets it go shakily. They lay like this for a minute, till Simon feels a kiss on his forehead and hears a creak in the mattress. Then, the weight is gone and footsteps lead to the bathroom. The light flicks, the sink turns on.

This is more than enough to wake up Ghost, so he’ll seize this opportunity in a moment. 

A beat. Two.

Then he opens his eyes and throws his legs over the side of the bed. He slowly rises, joints protesting (is he getting old?), then goes to the bathroom. 

There, Johnny leans forward, palms gripping the edges of the sink. The water is running, but Johnny pays no mind. He looks kind of lost, Ghost thinks, as he watches him in the mirror. 

He hasn’t noticed him yet, so he calls his name lightly to get his attention. 

“Johnny?” He flinches a little, then turns to look Simon in the eye. He breathes a sigh that speaks a little of relief, and the tense posture melts a little.

“Hey, Si,” he responds. It's soft, vulnerable, and it makes him move into action.

He leans forward and grabs the back of Johnny’s neck, bringing him in for a hug.

“You okay?” 

He doesn’t respond verbally. He just kind of shrugs then buries his head deeper into Simon’s neck.

“Want to talk about it?” He asks while slowly runs his hand down the back of his head. They rarely do, when it's like this. If it isn’t precluded by violence, they don’t feel the need to.

Johnny shakes his head no. 

So they don’t talk about it, but he’s clearly shaken. They sit there for a couple minutes, Simon holding him close. When it gets like this, with one of them practically non verbal, contact is the most important thing. So he keeps holding him, rubbing small circles along his back. At some point Simon leans over and turns off the water, but they never stop holding each other.

And he would stay like this all night if Jonny needed, he really would, but it's getting late and they have a long day tomorrow. It wouldn’t hurt to suggest it, so-

“Let’s go to bed, okay?”

Johnny doesn’t respond right away, and for a minute Simon thinks he hadn’t heard him. Then,

“Yeah,” 

They shuffle to bed, Simon underneath Johnny as he uses his chest as a pillow. He runs his hand up and down his arm, soothing both of them. Slowly the tension in his shoulders begins to dissipate as Ghost continues his ministrations.

He plants a kiss on Johnny’s forehead, then another. When he goes in for the third kiss he leans his head up and captures Simon’s lips in a kiss. And he never gets tired of this. This is familiar, no matter the circumstances. 

After a moment, Johnny pulls away, eyes a little red rimmed.

“Hey, what's this? You’re alright,” Simon cups Johnny’s jaw and searches his face. He leans in to kiss him once more and Simon goes willingly. When they break away again, Johnny just looks at him. 

“You’re the best thing that ever happened to me, Simon Riley. I don’t ever want you to forget that,” he croaks after a minute, accent strong from sleep and his voice scratchy from the silence and presumably trying not to cry.

And Simon doesn’t even think about it. Doesn’t have to. “Feelings mutual, sweetheart,” He responds, because it is. Yeah, he isn’t the best with words, but Simon knows Johnny knows what he means. “Where’s this coming from?” 

“I just…” he trails off, contemplative. He shifts his head so he isn’t looking at Simon anymore, he stares at the ceiling. “Rough sleep, is all. You know the drill.” 

Of course he does, so Simon just nods his head in the affirmative. He thinks that will be the end of the conversation for the night, as Johnny doesn’t elaborate. For the most part, his breaths have evened out, and for a moment Simon thinks he’s fallen asleep. 

“Do you ever think about after?” Johnny asks once Simon has started to drift off. It's quiet, like he’s afraid to voice it. Maybe he's afraid to wake him up, or maybe he’s afraid of the vulnerability- it’s a hard read.

“After?”

“After the job. Retirement. Something like that.” Has he?

The truth is that before Johnny (that’s how he's started categorizing his life now), he hadn’t. Like he stated before, Simon wasn’t really real before him. It was all “The Ghost”, and never Simon Riley. He had always assumed that he would die on the job, life taken from him like so much had been in his past.

But now, after he and Johnny had started all of this, he finds himself thinking about it. In the small hours of the night. In the loud moments when Soap tells a particularly cheesy joke and Simon can’t help but laugh. In the interludes of missions. During briefs, when he manages to split time between focusing on the job and thinking about him. 

It might be all he thinks about. 

“Yeah, sometimes,” He answers simply. “Do you?”

Johnny nods his head.

“And what would you have us do?” Simon asks. 

“It depends on the day, I guess. Sometimes I think we go to Glasgow. We buy a small apartment. Maybe get a dog.” He responds after a minute. 

“Maybe a cat too, yeah?”

“Anything you want, Simon,” It makes his heart warm. “Or maybe we move to the countryside of london.”

“I like the sound of that.”

“Yeah?”

“Plenty of room for the dogs to run,” he says. “Less busy.” 

Johnny grunts in affirmation, then asks, “The clean air would do us some good, don’t you think?” 

Simon does, and he tells him as much. They both bask in the silence, probably thinking of the same thing.

Because he can see it now. Him and Johnny in a small apartment, or a cottage in the countryside, or the seaside, or anywhere. It doesn’t matter. The two of them wrapped together when they go to bed and when the sun comes up, taking the mornings slow. No hustle and bustle of the army, no nagging worry that the next mission could be there last. They take on animals, because Johnny wants to and so does Simon. Around the holidays they have their family over- the one they made for themselves- and they gather around a table and reflect about their war stories. 

It’s good. It might be home.

“Do you think about it a lot?” Simon asks Johnny.

“When the going gets tough, yeah. Not that I would anytime soon, but yeah. I do.”

There’s a moment of silence as Simon thinks.

“When we’re ready,” he starts, “We’ll find somewhere. Just for the two of us. And you’ll get your dog and I’ll get my cat. And we’ll stock the cabinets with that tea I like and keep the coffee hot for you so you aren’t an absolute cunt in the mornings,” Johnny laughs at that. “And we’ll wake up together, and go to sleep together, and just live together. And it will be ours.”

“Sounds like you’ve done a lot of thinking too, Simon.” He responds, and tilts his

How could I not?  “I’ve floated a couple ideas around, sure.” Johnny chuckles, like he sees right through him. He probably does.

Johnny tilts his head to look at Simon again, less haunted and more warm. Alive. It's got that look that's only reserved for Simon. 

He knows it’s love.

They stare at each other for a while, even as Johnny’s eyelids start to droop. Simon should be responsible, suggest to him that they catch some shut eye, but he can’t. He likes looking at Johnny’s eyes. His face.

He’s got this smile. A little loopy, a little reserved, but strong nonetheless. Simon swoops down and kisses that smile, long and soft. He never stops smiling through it, and it's contagious. Simon pulls away smiling.

“I love you Johnny Mactavish,” He says, a little breathless. Johnny tended to have that effect on him.

“I love you too,” he murmurs. 

And they stay like this, until they both drift off.

And in the morning they’ll have their duties. They will debrief with their captain, and Ghost will fill out the appropriate paperwork and Johnny will ask to help, and they’ll do it together. And that big bad world that Simon protects him from, well Johnny does the same for him. He’ll pull him to bed when he's gotten caught up and hasn’t noticed the time. And he’ll massage his overtly tense muscles and they'll kiss each other's bruises that weren’t there last night. And then they’ll go to sleep together, maybe Simon will sneak into Johnny’s bed this time. 

And then in a couple weeks, or a couple of days, they’ll get shipped out again. Do this dance all over again. 

But, in the end, that doesn’t matter. What matters is that they will do it together.

[coraniaid]

I'm not sure what part of the above gave you the impression I want characters to have "textbook perfect relationships". Because I don't believe that's something I've ever suggested; not here and not in anything else I've written.

I like it when characters have messy, flawed and imperfect relationships. I like it when those flawed relationships are the catalyst for the plot to advance. I like characters who misunderstand each other, or are a little bit hypocritical, or who have a sense of themselves that isn't really accurate.

I don't at all care for the popular fandom version of Giles as somebody who is -- or should have been -- a flawless and faultless father figure to not just Buffy but all her other teenage friends. I don't think that's who the character in the show is, and I think he -- and the show -- would have been much more boring if he was.

(At the same time, I'm not sure this particular fandom reading is necessarily very modern: I've read things written ten, fifteen or even twenty-five years ago that seem to assume that Giles is best understood as The Group Dad. People were wrong about it then and they're wrong about it now, but I don't think it's a recent idea.)

I like the fact that Buffy and Giles's relationship is, at its core, a little bit messed up. That both of them care about each other more than they think the other would want them to admit; that Giles does seem to see Buffy as something like a daughter while, at the same time, being aware that he's responsible for telling her she can't have a normal life and training her to face the prospect of violent death every night. I think that's kind of the emotional heart of the show, at least for the first couple of seasons.

Equally, I like the fact that Giles never seems to notice how much Xander looks up to him and craves his approval; how he turns an almost intentional blind eye to all the hints we get about Xander's dreadful home life; how Xander remains, to him, little more than Buffy and Willow's rather boorish and lazy friend whose jokes and company he can sometimes barely tolerate. I think that makes a lot of sense for both their characters.

I don't particularly need a character to be sympathetic to find them interesting, and indeed I don't -- outside of his relationship with Buffy -- find Giles sympathetic most of the time. I've met a few people with similar backgrounds to Giles in my life, and I can't say any of us were happier for it. But as a fictional character, I do find Giles compelling. I wouldn't post about him if I didn't.

The specific issue I have with Giles and Faith in Season 3 is that there is a vast gulf between what the show is actually depicting and the story which the writers seem to think they are telling. I don't think any of the messiness or flaws here are at all intentional or that the show will ever think to do anything creative with them. I don't think the writers realize quite how dreadfully Giles comes across.

Faith isn't just some random teenage friend of Buffy, like Xander or Cordelia or Willow. She is a Slayer with a dead Watcher and absolutely no other support system, living alone in a strange town. I don't think it's possible to pretend Giles doesn't have a duty of care towards her. At the end of her first appearance on the show, Giles explicitly volunteers for the job of -- in his own words -- looking after her. Specifically, he tells Buffy that:

"The council has approved our request. Faith is to stay here indefinitely. I'm to look after you both until a new Watcher is assigned."

A new Watcher isn't assigned until after Giles himself is fired, so Giles is -- by his own request! -- the sole adult figure responsible for looking after Faith from that point until then. And what does he do to "look after" Faith? What does he try to do? The answer, as far as we can tell on the basis of the evidence provided on screen, is: nothing. He ignores her as much as possible, only trains her when she's with Buffy anyway, doesn't ever ask himself what she's up to when she's not Slaying or waiting for orders in the library of the school she isn't enrolled at, and then -- when she gets into trouble, when she does something that we know Giles himself once did as a young man (an accident after which he was supported and protected by the Council) -- his only priority is protecting "his" Slayer, the (better mannered, more middle class, more respectable) teenage girl he actually likes. He blithely talks about needing to make Faith "think" he was on her side, but ignores the fact that he literally agreed months ago to be on her side. That that was a responsibility he personally requested.

Again, if the writers wanted this to be deliberate, that would be fine. I'd think rather poorly of GIles, sure -- more so than usual, even -- but there is clearly a potentially interesting story to be had there. Only, it seems pretty clear that this isn't the story the writers think they've told at all.

At no point is Giles's own role in Faith's descent to the dark side ever addressed. There is absolutely no pay-off or follow through for the things I'm complaining about. At no point does anybody on screen wonder why Giles didn't try to find somewhere for Faith to live, or react more like the way he did last year when it was Buffy who he believed had killed a man, or why he seems to have forgotten that he not only agreed but asked for the job of looking after Faith. We are seemingly not meant to think Giles has done (or failed to do) anything remarkable.

After this season, when Faith appears on Angel, she will talk as if Wesley was her Watcher all along, and Giles was exclusively Buffy's Watcher. That Wesley is the Watcher she thinks somehow let her down. The show will act as if that is true, and as if what she's saying makes sense, but it isn't and it doesn't. In Season 3, Wesley only arrived in Sunnydale to take over the role of both Buffy and Faith's Watcher. Giles was the sole Watcher responsible for looking after Faith for months. He was the only adult in her life for the large majority of her time living in Sunnydale. In fact, Wesley was actually Buffy's Watcher -- at least officially -- for longer than he was ever Faith's Watcher. And Faith never takes him seriously as a Watcher, the way that Buffy does at first.

Giles as Faith's acting Watcher isn't something the show comes back to when Faith returns to Buffy either. In the seventh season of the show, Faith and Giles only briefly interact. We see Giles telling Faith at one point that she's "doing fine" as the group's temporary leader (she isn't, but okay...), but the only suggestion here is that Faith has reformed enough to have earned Giles' approval. There is again no suggestion that Giles ever did anything wrong by her, or that the crux of this scene should in fact be her deciding whether to forgive him.

If the writers had meant Giles's relationship to Faith to be deliberately complicated or imperfect, these all seem like rather strange choices. It seems pretty clear that we aren't meant to think Giles did anything particularly wrong or noteworthy or objectionable at all.

Only, as actually written, he did. He very obviously did. And the writers just aren't interested in taking that seriously.

The point of my post isn't that I think Faith and Giles should have had a "perfect relationship" or that there's no place for stories about Giles not being especially good at his job. I'm not suggesting that the writers should have tried to tell a different story. I'm arguing that, with a few small changes, they'd have done a better job of telling the story that they were seemingly trying to tell all along.

Anyway, I do think you can preserve almost all of the core of Faith's arc in Season 3 and still present Giles in a much more favorable light than canon with only a very few minor tweaks.

At some point, in one of the early season episodes that Faith doesn't otherwise appear in -- Band Candy, say -- in a scene featuring just Buffy and Giles together, have Buffy comment on Faith's absence, wonder out loud if being alone in her motel room is good for her, and have Giles say something to the effect of "Perhaps you're right to be concerned, but we must respect Faith's wishes. In fact I offered to arrange for more salubrious lodgings when it became clear she would be staying with us for a while, but she assured me she was quite all right where she is." Because, look, of course if an older man she didn't really know offered to set Faith up with a nicer place to stay for free she was going to say no. Of course that doesn't mean she's actually happy living in a motel in the bad part of town, and of course she's still impressed when the Mayor gets her an apartment and clearly doesn't want anything from her in return (or, at least, he's only looking for wholesome family-friendly murder and torture and treason, not what she'd expect him to want). But at least this way we can point to evidence Giles actually tried to do the right thing. The thing that he explicitly volunteered to do.

In Helpless, when Buffy complains about Faith being "off on one of her unannounced walkabouts", don't have Giles -- who at this very moment is not interested in training Buffy but instead setting her up for the events of Cruciamentum -- remark snidely that "Faith is not interested in proper training", but instead explicitly link back to the events of Revelations. Have him remind Buffy that Faith took Mrs Post's betrayal very badly and say that he's deliberately letting her take a break from training for a bit because he thinks it will give her some time to recover emotionally. And, again, Giles wouldn't be right to think this -- Faith would be better off if she was spending time with other people -- but at least we'd get less of an impression that, after Post arrived, Giles decided he was done being Faith's temporary replacement Watcher and that he didn't really care what happened to her afterwards (even after Post was exposed as a fraud).

The key things you need to have happen in Consequences are (a) Faith lies to Giles and says Buffy killed Finch; (b) Giles talks to Buffy privately and they both acknowledge that actually Faith killed Finch; (c) Wesley overhears this conversation and calls in the Council to take Faith back to England. You don't actually need Giles to suggest he was only pretending to be on Faith's side to humor her; you don't need him to be so skeptical when Buffy talks about helping Faith. You could instead have Giles remind Buffy that he himself killed somebody by accident when he was not much older than Faith, and have him say that he pretended to believe her simply because -- knowing what she had to be going through -- he thought it would be better to humor her than provoke a confrontation. Rather than just have him dismiss her as "unstable" and "unwilling to accept responsibility", make the parallels with Giles's own backstory explicit. "In Faith's shoes, I would be -- I was -- unstable. Unpredictable. I needed time to accept responsibility." When Buffy suggests she could talk to her, rather than just sigh and look skeptical, Giles could apolgetically reference his own role in the Cruciamentum a few episodes earlier, and use that as a reason why Faith might not be willing to trust him yet. Instead of just ... nobody suggesting Giles talk to her, even when agreeing that perhaps somebody other than Buffy should.

And really, none of what Buffy and Giles plan at this point really even matters, because all we need to happen next is for Xander to admit that he slept with Faith and that he assumes this means they have "a connection", Buffy and Willow to react to that, and then for Xander to decide to go talk to her alone to prove his point. And then we proceed as before to Faith attacking him, Angel coming to the rescue, and then the rest of the episode as normal (including with Faith going off to tell the Mayor she heard he had a job opening).

In fact arguably I think this version of events actually works better, because after Consequences (and before the reveal in Enemies) the show actually does proceed on the basis that Giles is willing to help Faith and supervize her post-manslaughter evaluation and recovery. It has to, because if he insists she's a lost cause and can't be trusted from the beginning there's no Enemies and no chance for her to betray Buffy and the gang. So there wasn't really any actual story-driven need for Giles to seem so reluctant about trying to help Faith in the first place, was there?

I mean, in the actual show I think nobody knew at the time what Faith's arc was going to be, and that era of the show wasn't quite as dedicated to continuity as it would be later and didn't like throwing in so many references to past episodes. And the show never actually does take Giles's role in the Cruciamentum seriously after Helpless, or have Giles mention Randall's death after season 2 (Ted is the last time he's mentioned, right?). But in hindsight I think something like this -- even if it couldn't have happened -- would better balance the actual story that you want to tell about Faith with the goal of having Giles seem rather more admirable and sympathetic than his treatment of Faith ends up making him look.

[twisting-roads]

theres a good reason waters doesn't see npm as a very close friend

[lokh]

what do you think toshiro's version of laios would've been like if he was still with the group during the shapeshifter shenanigans

there have been a few speculations in the tag and among the fans and they are all very good SO i am going to take this opportunity to insert a bit of my shipping bias as i like in my interpretation LMAO agdsfgdfgv

i noted that in actuality shuro seems to have a very good grasp on laios' character??? this is most obvious in the manga later on but even seeing how he criticises laios in their fight... iirc nothing he says is actually untrue or wildly exaggerated, and while he does express frustration over something he feels like laios Should have control over (noticing his cues), he is also aware that laios isnt being malicious and that hes Just Like That. what i mean to say is that while i think his version of laios may seem more pushy and in-your-face, i dont think it will be overwhelmingly so. if its post-fight, i think the idea of laios (and marcille) being willing to do anything to get falin back made a big impression on him, as well as the idea that they need to eat and rest in order to succeed in their goals, so those aspects would be prominent in his version. he seems pretty observant, so i think for the most part the physical traits would line up, but i think there would be specific things that stand out to him that would appear strangely striking on his version of laios (like. idk something about his eye colour or the subtle contrast of his armour and chainmail. he seems to have a weird sense of aesthetics if extras are anything to go by lmao). if hed actually been paying attention all those times laios had gone on about what the hell ever, then it might be even MORE hard to tell apart his version since he would also have a good grasp on what laios should know. so either his version of laios is pretty difficult to pick out, OR despite the character being accurate his appearance is too. stylised lmao (exaggerated features or something) OR!! they just get him to pull out his monster gourmet guide thing and are able to tell from there. iirc everyone was surprised at its appearance so its possible toshiro had also never seen it before

IN MY IMAGINARY SHIPPING SCENARIO............ lets say that his laios isnt able to be picked out immediately and that the monster guide thing also doesnt immediately occur to anyone. what the real laios Specifically notices is how close this other laios keeps getting to shuro. and hes like. ??? why is he getting so close to him, theres no way i get that close to him??? but no one else seems to be picking up on it as weird, so hes having a small crisis like do i REALLY get that close to him???? and now that hes on the outside he notices shuro subtly leaning away and he feels both a wave of shame and..... protectiveness??? (JEALOUSY??????) and he immediately steps in and grabs him like Hey!!! cant you see hes uncomfortable???? weve been through this already!!! and like. ok i cant believe im doing this again but i need to separate this into different endings

a) the whump route: i dont think shuro ever envisioned Actually Telling laios about his frustrations outside of being basically cornered into it. has he ever spoken up against what was expected of him?? has he ever been confrontational???? i think part of what held him back from expressing his frustrations, along with the cultural norms, could be fear of what the reaction would be. if he had done the same in any other aspect of his life (his family, his inheritance), i think he would expect disappointment, disapproval, more proof that he doesnt add up to expectation. to be honest i dont think he Truly believes that laios is the type of person to react like this. but it was strong enough to prevent him from acting and i think would be projected onto his image of laios. maybe fake!laios says something dismissive like Well if it really bothered him hed say something right? what, he cant even stand up for himself? cmon, shuro, prove that you cant handle it just like everything else. and thats pretty much the fastest giveaway that it isnt really laios. of course this would be a HUGE tonal departure from what the actual episode/chapter was, so:

b) the dumbass route: both laioses break into fisticuffs, and, yes.... barking. and so they speedrun the entire encounter as the shapeshifters true form appears and, after laios points out that thinking too hard about others versions of you can tear apart groups and peace of mind, they pointedly do not speak of it again. they think about it though. a LOT

c) the normal route: both laioses argue normal like and the group ends up being able to tell them apart because the fake laios goes on a little too long about how theyre all here for falin and everyones like ok its not like he DOESNT love his sister but.......... the rest of the scenario probably goes like canon, though then i would want to see what everyone Else thought of shuro

[theflopwonder]

Me, naively: Omg haha what if I wrote a fic abt the party at the fortress of solitude in superman/batman 26 as an excuse to do some Tim & Kon character study?

Me, after reading 4 separate comic runs from 4 different editorial teams who were OBVIOUSLY not talking to each other AT ALL to try and figure out the timeline & other logistics of this party: WHO THE FUCK FUCKED UP THIS HOUSE LIKE THIS GOOD GOD??????????

[through-the-rabbit-hole]

Thank you for the addition! This is much better worded than my unstructured little rant.

I'm aware of the (to me unfortunate) trend of how books are advertised these days, whether it be with terms such as dark academia used as a genre indicator despite being an aesthetic, or as "book 1 meets book 2 meets book 3", or just tropes (enemies to lovers, childhood friends, etc). The sales of a book hinge on its marketability to the modern audience, and I do not blame authors for doing what they should to get their book out there, especially with the sheer number of books published every year. It's a constant race against other books that fit in that same specific niche or genre. This is just a truth about publishing.

However, I think it's precisely what you mentioned about Babel and The Secret History being lumped in the same category of dark academia that makes me wary of dark academia being used as a genre (at least on the internet, since it isn't officially, to my knowledge! but I'd argue the internet is where it most counts anyway). Romance, fantasy, mystery, thriller and other genres are very good categories to sort a book into because they're, as you say, indicative of a structure and elements of a book in a way that has been defined long ago and that people have consistently been using for years. (Despite my dislike of romantasy, I'll concede that it also makes sense that it's now its own category; the elements of romance and fantasy are equally important, you'll know what you're getting into, and there's enough similar books in the category that you can contrast and compare and say that they all fit.) Dark academia, as I mentioned in the beginning, is a concept you can grasp as an aesthetic if you look at enough Pinterest moodboards, but that becomes much muddier and more complicated when you try to define it as a genre. And the consequences of that are books that don't actually have all that much in common all being marketed to you the same way, only for you to find that the actual genre doesn't fit your taste, and the imagery that the books invoke are about where the similarities between them end. But you read it because it was "dark academia", and you thought it would make sense when you started reading.

Of course, I can't put it all on the author marketing their book. R. F. Kuang may have done it herself, but Donna Tartt sure as hell didn't know what dark academia was, so it was internet spaces like TikTok, Instagram, YouTube, Tumblr, etc. that took the book, slapped the dark academia label onto it and shared it around. And I think my gripe with that is that there is not enough time to read all the books you want to read in your life, so you want to read good books, or rather books that you'll enjoy. Which means that you have to be very careful with what you choose to read and whose opinion you're going to follow when you look for recommendations, and labels like dark academia make it difficult to accurately judge if it's for you or not, because you think you identify with it but then end up being disappointed by the book. (For the record, it's not just dark academia as an aesthetic that gets this treatment; I've seen Bunny by Mona Awad quite a few times described as "coquette", and I'm pretty sure that term is widely used to indicate a specific clothing style, if not aesthetic.)

I don't know why The Secret History is considered THE dark academia book, and for that matter I don't think anyone knows what dark academia even is at this point. It's an aesthetic, yes, but it only works as a visual and maybe musical aesthetic. Books aren't about the visual aesthetic, they're about characters and plot and relationships and symbols and themes. They're not a photo collage put into words; if I wanted a photo collage I would have sought a photo collage.

The Secret History offers some good visuals that people enjoy, but it's not a "dark academia" book, because no book is a "dark academia" book. I've been reading Babel by R. F. Kuang, and it's unironically more of an "academia" book than The Secret History, because I, too, feel like throwing up when I start studying for exams, and the book actually critically examines academia. Not to mention, it's very clear that R. F. Kuang is very interested in language, and uses the academia setting to share her thoughts on some specific questions and topics in the field of linguistics. It's not "dark academia", but it's something better: it's about academia. It's not just meant to invoke a specific imagery.

( This is not to say The Secret History is bad for not being like Babel. I love the book. I just don't want it to be labeled a "dark academia" book, because that dilutes the book down to an aesthetic, and it's so much more than an aesthetic. )

For the record. It's because of the rising popularity of dark academia and books being an aesthetic that we get works like House of Hollow, which is, ironically, entirely hollow and void of deeper meaning and themes.

[moeblob]

Right and his work menaces (Brent and Karen).

I don't remember last I mentioned it but apart from crude nicknames to people (except Chris), he also just puts them in his phone really weird (except Chris, who is literally in his phone as Chris). And I bring this up because in Right's phone, Karen is saved as "Lawful Obligation".

[skitskatdacat63]

Thank you f1 for being canon compliant and putting Fernando in his habitual Santa suit

[mbat]

this was an idea i had last year that i found in my files and decided to revive. woe, angst be upon ye

[hanzajesthanza]

also i realize i'm saying all these noble and beautiful things about the channel from the purest depths of my heart. but actually i'm also just doing this because i fucking love the witcher books and it pisses me off that people don't know about them that much in english and i can only go for so long (seven years) with people not knowing that there are books. or that the witcher is from the 90s. or polish.

[prettyboykatsuki]

even tho you dk him yet,, caleb 🙂‍↕️

here we go pre-emptive sex taste typology with mr siscon yan cyborg

also no direct incest but just assume its implied w him which is why i tag w psuedocest

disclaimer for all that with the exception of zayne i really only barely know these men. at least im only semi-confident (read: barely) in writing for them. that is part of the fun.

of them, i know the least about caleb aside from what ive absorbed via osmosis. and sylus

my opinion of this guys sexual preferences is very mixed fyi. i havent met him and have not spoiled the story for myself yet so . you know.

none of this is meant to be accurate DSJFHJKSD !!!!!!

to me he feels like a service top. if he were like normaler i would categorize him a very giving lover in general but he's got soooo many issues. still, i dont think this part of him really goes away KJDSHKJD. i just don't think he is kind about being one later on if u will ?

you're usually the one getting pleasured and doing the receiving but it's not out magnanimity but more like he is trying to prove a point to you by manipulating your body. id substantiate a guess that his desire from control comes form other fear of not wanting to lose u like most of the other men in the game lol

for kinks.........maybe sensory deprivation like blindfolding and corporal punishment but not so much it borders into complete sadism. a fan of spanking. also i do not go here so this is said rather unbiased but i think that man has a somewhat subconscious breeding kink perhaps.

though its less in how i think like. another character would have it and more in the effort to corrupt the idea of family you have between you. something something him cumming in you while you refer to him as gege etc. but he also just seems like he'd want to go bareback at all times even in a vanilla like... actual older brother context. again i do not rlly having a breeding kink. game just recognizes game.

he's in general obsessed with marking you in some manner or fashion for exactly the reason you think but i think just manifests w breeding yk.

hm. probably also likes being fully clothed while your naked. vulnerability, control, complete access etc.

i think he gets off on embarrassing you and probably has since you were a lot younger but it becomes very ugly later on lol. once again if he were normaler i think it'd just be him like...making you beg for it in bed but its much weirder now. enjoys putting his thumb in your mouth for a weird reason as well

likes inspection maybe. thats really just me guessing though. based on vibes.

i think for now this is all i have got. i dont know this man so until i learn his character motivations this as much as i can cook for you guys. if u can without spoiling tell me my accuracy rate that would v funny

[blueskittlesart]

POST MORE SWORD OF FATE PLS IM BEGGING

i have very little in terms of actual art LMAO but i CAN explain the sword thing because i checked and i did in fact never make this plot point public. i struggled for a while with creating a villain for this story until i realized that. i put "sword" in the title of the game. of course it has to be about the fucking sword. DUH.

so i want SOF to deal very heavily with religion, specifically the way in which hyrule's religion forms post-sksw but pre-reincarnation. i've placed it on the timeline directly after sksw, making it the first actual reincarnation in hyrule. what this means is that there's no actual proof yet that the reincarnation thing is real and not just an insane bluff on demise's part, and so several key characters including link and zelda barely believe in hylia or demise at all when the story starts. my thought with this setting's version of ganon is that he's the polar opposite of the nonbelievers. The gerudo don't really exist as of now, but he DOES come from the desert region of hyrule--specifically, he was raised in a cultlike offshoot of the sheikah religion which interpreted the hylia/demise myth completely literally and believes that a doomsday is coming, heralded by the foretold return of demise. Because of this, he knows more about the cycle and how to set it in motion than basically any other character. Crucially, he and his people are some of the only ones at this point aware of the existence of the master sword.

ganon finds. a sword. a sword which he THINKS is the master sword. and this theory is only reinforced when the sword begins to speak to him about his destiny and the salvation of hyrule. unfortunately it is not the master sword and he ends up basically a pawn in the greater plans of what's left of demise & ghirahim within that sword, manipulated into attempting to revive demise and destroy the reincarnated hero and princess. he remains in denial until basically the very end of the final battle, completely convinced that he is the true savior of hyrule and LINK is the one being misled. ghirahim is a very good manipulator lol

[oaksapling]

he is like a disney prince 2 me