#THERE IS A DESSERT CALLED DEATH BY CHOCOLATE

[kindred-spirit-93]

and molten cake :')

rip remus lupin you would’ve loved ibuprofen

[sleepywinchesters]

"Hey, babe, grab me another cookie?" Buck asked when Tommy stood to clear his plate.

"As you wish," Tommy replied.

Chim laughed, earning him a blank stare from both his wife and brother and law.

"The Princess Bride? As you wish? Guys?" Chim asked, when neither provided the requisite chuckle the reference required.

Tommy turned from the counter where he was poking through the cookies, trying to find the cranberry white chocolate he'd spotted earlier, and mentally claimed for dessert. Buck's oatmeal chocolate chip already set aside on a napkin.

"Neither of us have any idea what you're talking about, Chim," Buck said, after a long moment.

"The movie?"

"I think it was a book first, actually," Tommy said.

"The movie," Chim continued, ignoring him. "Dread Pirate Roberts? Princess Buttercup? Death cannot delay true love? Have you not understood all my mostly dead references?"

"That's a reference?" Buck asked.

"Maddie, my love, did you think I was just complimenting your breasts this entire time?"

Buck made a face.

"Yes, I did," Maddie said, starting to look a little offended.

"And they are perfect, of course. I'd show you if we didn't have company, however-"

"Also a reference to, what was it?" Maddie said.

"The Princess Bride," Tommy said. "ROUSes? Six fingered man? You killed my father prepare to die? None of this is ringing a bell?"

"No," Buck said.

"Howie, how have they never seen The Princess Bride."

"That is a question I have been asking myself for 5 years, Tommy. I still haven't gotten an answer."

"Evan, what were you even doing in high school if not watching these classics?" Tommy asked, returning to the table, cookie in hand.

"Having sex."

"Maddie?"

"Keeping my little brother from accidentally killing himself," she said.

"Thanks for that, by the way," Tommy said around a mouthful of cookie. "I quite like him."

"Love you too, babe," Buck said, with a soft smile.

"Well, before you two get started on that, we have to rectify this frankly atrocious gap in your pop culture knowledge."

It was not the first time Buck and Maddie had been subjected to an impromptu movie night, as their friends discovered gaps. Buck automatically turned to Tommy, eyes wide.

"Oh don't give me that look, Evan. It's movie time," Tommy said with a smile. He reached across the table to take Buck's hand. "I don't know if I'd go so far as to call it atrocious, but you'll love it. I promise."

Buck groaned, Maddie echoed him.

"Fine," Maddie said. "But we aren't sharing the rest of the cookies."

@samwellwinchesterthebrave @honestlydarkprincess @monsterrae1

@desert--moonchild @bibuckkinard @buddiekinard @judesstfrancis @ohlookitsthearkhamknight @rdng1230 @diazsdimples As always let me know if you want added/removed

[d4yl1ghts]

new desires

simon basset x bridgerton, fem!reader

summary: you’re at your mother’s manor for dinner when you notice simon licking his spoon and you get some new thoughts

warnings: cunnilingus, praise kink, expeditionist kink, semi-public sex, fingering, p in v, orgasm, unprotected sex, nudity, breeding kink (maybe), dom!simon, sub!reader

A/N- this is kind of cringe but it’s fine!!!

-

You glanced at the entrance of your childhood home as your carriage pulled to a stop. Simon hastily rose from his seat and gently took your hand as he guided you down the steps. Amidst the buildings around you, the manor blended in as most buildings were large and housed families. However, the manor had a larger garden than most, which is what made it bolder than the others. Simon had a soft hold on your hand as you both entered. “Hello, dearest.”, your mother said cheerfully as she hugged you. “Hello, mother.”, you hugged her back.

She reached over to shake Simon’s hand. “Hello, your grace.”, she stated. He chuckled. “Violet, I have said many times, just call me Simon.”, he responded amusedly. “Alright, Simon.”, she replied. As you and Simon walked into the kitchen, you were suddenly surrounded by Francesca, Gregory and Hyacinth. “Aww, hello.”, you said as you ruffled Gregory’s hair. They all hugged you as Simon watched the interaction from the side. He smiled at you gently as you made eye contact with him once you had pulled away.

Your four other siblings made their way over to you now. Simon made his way to his seat to allow you some privacy and to catch up with your family. “Hello, Y/N, how are you, I haven’t seen you in such a long time?”, Anthony lead the conversation. “I’m doing well, it has been wonderful to have some time to ourselves but I’ve missed you all so much.”, you replied earnestly. “We have all missed you too.”, Daphne added. “Yeah, Anthony has gotten especially annoying ever since you’ve been gone.”, Benedict responded teasingly as he glanced at Anthony. Anthony gave him a death stare in an almost threatening manner.

“Eloise, have you read any new books whilst I’ve been gone?”, you questioned as you had noticed she had yet to speak. “Oh yes, of course. There was one about a man who rose back from the dead to be with his true love.”, she started. For roughly five minutes she was naming and describing the books she had read. “Everyone sit down.”, Violet ordered.

You made your way beside Simon and his lips curved upwards at the sight of you. “Did you have a nice catch up, dear?”, he asked tenderly. “Yes, Eloise was informing me of all the books she has read and Benedict was telling me how annoying Anthony had gotten since I had left.”, you answered. Simon chuckled slightly.

The maids placed down many plates of food so there was a choice for everyone. You all began gathering your food onto your plates. After your main courses, you were quite full but Simon was not. For dessert, the maids served chocolate mousse. As Simon ate it, you couldn’t help but stare. His tongue washed over the spoon with expertise and you could only let your imagination create another situation that his tongue would do that in. Simon seemed to notice you drooling over him. He smirked like he could read your mind.

He even had the nerve to slowly move his hand up to your inner thigh below your ball gown. You could feel a wetness forming quickly. You clenched your thighs together to ease the pressure and to get him away from where you needed him. You couldn’t do this here. He still continued to go up, until he reached your wetness. He began by gently rubbing it, teasing you. You bit your cheeks to hide your moans.

You gazed around the table, checking if anyone had realised that you were in the process of the Duke’s hand curling into your pussy. Your mother seemed to be already watching you intently. You offered her a quick smile before your attention was redirected to Simon plunging his fingers into your wetness. You turned to glare at Simon as you desperately held in your moan. Anthony, who was beside you, gave you a weird look once he noticed your expression and your mother was still watching you strangely.

After a few more minutes of everything finishing their desserts, you were finally able to leave the table and the teasing Simon was putting you through. “Simon and I are going to head upstairs for a bit.”, you waved everyone off as you dragged the Duke upstairs. “I can’t believe you just did that, my mother definitely knew something was going on as did Anthony.”, you muttered aggressively. He only chuckled in response. “You secretly enjoyed it.”, he simply stated. You had no response to that. You couldn’t accept it or deny it.

You only stared at him. “Are you going to finish what you have started or not?”, you asked with an annoyed expression on your face. He got down on his knees. “What are you doing?”, you questioned innocently. “I saw how you were looking at me whilst I licked that spoon.”, he reminded you. You said nothing. He helped you remove your ball gown and undergarments. He began lightly pushing his fingers in and out of your pussy to get slicken you up.

Abruptly, he gently placed his tongue in your slit and ran it up and down it. You moaned at loudly at the new feeling of pleasure. “Good girl.”, he praised you. That only made you more soaked. He started lapping his tongue against your folds, making you cry out slightly. You could feel your high coming. He sped up the pace of his tongue and as you came, he swallowed all of you.

“That was so good, your grace.”, you panted out. “Why have we never tried that before?”, you asked. “I didn’t whether you would want to try or if you’d be opposed to it.”, he stated honestly. He then attached his lips to your neck and bit down gently. You lightly moaned out: “Simon…”

You could feel his hardness against your body and you stared at him as you grabbed his shirt, silently asking him to take it off. He did as you said and threw it off quickly. He kissed you passionately before removing his pants and garments. You pulled him closer to you so you could feel his bulge and he could feel your wetness against his body.

He slowly aligned himself with your entrance and gently pushed his length in. You moaned as you felt his cock inside you. Once you had adjusted to his size, he began to thrust at a faster rate. You and he both moaned. “Well done, my love.” You felt yourself tighten and his cock twitch inside you. You felt yourself come undone as you felt his shoot slide deep into your pussy. “Gosh.”, you panted. You sounded like a dog. He stared at you in admiration as he softly huffed.

It was the next day and you had slept in for obvious reasons. You made your way down for breakfast and noticed Benedict pointing at you and giggling. “Hmm?”, you mumbled. Simon hastily got up towards you and whispered: “It seems that after last night, I left a few marks on you, dear.”, Simon confessed guiltily.

You headed towards the closest bathroom and noticed the massive bruise on your neck from where Simon bit it. “Simon!”, you whisper-yelled. “Sorry.”, he said as he smirked at you. “Do you have a scarf or something?”, you questioned.

You walked back into the dining room with a red scarf around your neck and everyone offers you perplexed looks except the ones who had worked out what had happened, they silently laughed at you.

[noirflms]

DEAR FUTURE HUSBAND — jjk men

wherein you follow an infamous tik-tok trend on them ( to get their hilarious reactions. )

prompt: it is a warm day and you’ve planned an outing with your dear boyfriend, but you have a mischievous idea in your mind as you set your phone up on the dash, following along the act from the infamous tik-tok prank wherein girlfriends are ordering and trying out stuff with their boyfriends but amidst the conversation they let slip the word ‘husband’ with the intention of seeing the reactions of the boyfriends being called just that.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ GOJO SATORU !

his eyes almost pop out of his skull. like? what did you just call him? did he hear you right? or were his ears just ringing as he just stares at you wide eyed as you converse on the phone, a smile on your face as you chatted away. you see him gaping at you like a fish, from the corner of your eye and it almost makes you snort, and you mutter in the phone again.

“yes, my husband would like a dessert to go with it too.”

“husband?” he inquires, mind boggled as he gazes at you. you could feel the excitement tinged in his voice and it only make you smile from ear to ear.

“yeah, that is it for my husband and me!” you turn to face him with a grin as you spoke into the phone, and as you cut the call, he could only stare at you in awe and a million more emotions full of affection.

“did you just say i am your husband?” he questioned, cheeks beginning to pop with the colour red. and you nod, acting all innocent as you gazed at him and oh god— the stare made butterflies in his stomach as he shies away in his hands and you finally snort at his reaction.

and maybe, just maybe, the box kept snug in the dashboard will be the answer.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ GETO SUGURU !

he sees something coming, he has foreseen it but this was not what he was actually expecting. he suddenly turns to look at you wide eyed as soon as you had mumbled the word ‘husband’ and it was as if past lives of you and him together began to flash in his mind. he keeps gazing at you with all the affections in the world as you giggled and spoke in the phone.

“yes, thank you, my husband will call you for it!”

and as soon as those words left your lips and you cut the call, he’s still gazing at you, lovestruck and almost lovesick. just staring. and staring. and staring.

“what?” you giggled, cheeks heating up as you too gazed back at him. “nothing, wife.” he utters and gosh, you think you almost died and resurrected in the same spot in the car. you just wish to drown in his warm chocolate pools and never come back up.

you shy away in the palm of your hands hiding your face and he chuckles, a deep one rumbles from his chest and you were sure he was going to be the death of you. “now, don’t shy away on me. you did it first, wife!”

“stooopppp.” you whine as you throw your head back into the seat, fever crossing your features and he only laughs heartily to your reaction.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ NANAMI KENTO !

he’s like; i’m sorry? did i hear it right? husband? who? he’s got a neutral face through it all, looking at you as you spoke, words rolling off your tongue as if he has always been your husband, all ringed and up and yours, vowed and bound to you and only you.

as soon as the call cuts, you turn to face him, lashes blinking up at him, eyes warm and full of mischief. “who was it?” nanami inquires first and foremost.

“oh, some guy pestering me for a date, so i told him i have a husband!” you reasoned, mentally punching the air in victory with the already practiced line and he’s like what? excuse you?

“a guy?” he questioned, a bit bewildered and you try your best not to snort. “yeah, he is my client.” you lied again; and you could feel your nose growing, but you just gazed at him, leaning back into your seat.

he just right up gazes at you with a straight face and speaks:

“yeah well, tell him to now contact your husband for any available deals.”

and you think you just died.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ INO TAKUMA !

he is so confused and dumbfounded. he cannot comprehend the word for the life of him. he goes to check his ring finger and then eye yours and when he sees nothing, and it makes him much more bewildered than before, but he doesn’t say anything; only choosing to hear you speak further.

“i am sorry but my husband handles a lot of stuff around the house.” you chuckle softly into the phone, trying your best not to laugh, knowing well of the stare targeted right at you.

“yes. you can contact him.” you say again. eyes turning to look at him and you raise a brow at him and he just shakes his head, shrugging as if asking you that ‘no, you tell me what’s the problem.’

as soon as you end the call and keep the phone away, you face him, biting the smile away from your lips as you see him staring at you with observant eyes. “what?” you spoke, voice gentle and acting all innocent.

“did we marry drunk in vegas or what?” he suddenly inquires and you can’t help but let out the laugh you held. “what? what is so funny, wife?”

“you, mr. husband.” you snort, cheekily raising your brows at him. and his cheeks turn red and he thinks he is melting feeling all warm and feverish.

and you softly chuckle at the reaction you are getting out of him as you laugh when he melts into his seat, falling down his seat. gosh, you love this dork so much.

HSISBEJBEID I ACTUALLY AM OBSESSED WITH THE REACTIONS IN THE TREND 😭😭😭

© noirflms twenty twenty four ─── all rights reserved . plagiarism is a crime . do not copy .

[rookinthecrownest]

Bedtime Stories For a Demon, Night 2: Swan Lake (Lucanis x Rook Fanfic)

The next night, Lucanis finds himself arranging a few plates on the dining table ahead of Rook’s planned arrival. He arranges, then rearranges, doubts what he made, or if it was weird thing to do in general. But he remembers his conversation with Neve from earlier in the day, and that seems to hold his nerves steady for the time being.

He had walked into her office-room with a question. And Neve, unsurprisingly, knew exactly what that question was before he even got to her front door. She was a damn good detective, he had to give her that.

“Planning something special for Rook?” she asked coyly.

“You know her better than I do” He admitted, scratching the side of his beard. “She’s … helping me. I want to do something nice for her”

“Is that all?” Neve quirked a brow and leaned back in her chair. An errant wisp floated by her hair, which she quickly swatted away gently.

Lucanis frowned. “Yes. That is all. Just tell me what I should make for her”

Neve crossed her arms, “Information rarely comes free in Minrathous”

“We’re not in Minrathous” he pointed out.

“You can take the girl out of the city, but you can’t take the city out of the girl” she said wistfully, closing her eyes and grinning.

Lucanis groaned and ran a hand down his face. “Fine, what do you want”

“Fried fish for dinner tomorrow night”

“I was going to make Paella tomorrow night”

“Well, now you’re making fried fish” Neve quipped.

“Mierda, alright. But I’m also making vegetables” He pointed at her, “You people need to get better eating habits”

Neve grinned and steepled her fingers together, then leaned forward on her desk. “Make the churros again. You might not have noticed her sneaking an extra one or… five, during dinner, but I certainly did. She wouldn’t stop talking about them the day after you made them”

“Churros” He repeated thoughtfully, as he rubbed his beard. He could do that. He should still have some ingredients left over from the first time he made them last week.

Rook likes sweet things. Smells like sweet things. Spite echoed in his head. He ignored that.

“Thank you, Neve” He gave her a curt nod before he turned to leave. “There will be fresh coffee in the dining hall in a few minutes if you’ve a mind for a real cup of it.” He called over his shoulder.

Lucanis left to her chuckling behind him and closed the door to her office. He had spent the rest of the day gathering supplies, and later in the evening when he was certain the team was asleep, he began preparing. The routine of baking and cooking was as calming as sharpening his longsword on a whetstone. Slow, methodical, rhythmic. But unlike sharpening his swords and knives, the end product was something that could bring joy, rather than misery and death. He tries to hang on to that.

When he finishes the churros, he decides that’s not enough. He makes a chocolate sauce to go with the churros. But maybe she prefers caramel? He should have asked Neve. So, he makes a caramel sauce as well. Then, he wants to see if she’ll like cioccolata calda and starts preparing that. It’s fairly late in the evening when he finishes the croissants he wasn’t planning on baking.

No sign of Rook yet.

He’s not sure when he started pacing with his second cup of coffee in hand.

She had accompanied Bellara to Arlathan – something about Veil Jumpers going missing deep in the forest. He shouldn’t worry. He’s seen Rook fight, she’s more than capable. But she does have a certain recklessness to her way of fighting. No - he doesn’t need to worry. He isn’t worrying.

He continues pacing. Then, he’s once again finding flaws with his arrangement of the desserts on the table. Would she find this strange? Too much? Off-putting, and not in a charming way but an unsettling way? Was there even a way to be charmingly off-putting?

He's pacing again.

“Am I interrupting something?”

He stops in his tracks.

Her voice has caught him off guard two nights in a row. That is a problem.

“Rook” He says stupidly.

“Hi” She waves meekly, and limps into the dining hall with a groan. She’s dragging her left foot on the ground. “Sorry I’m late – ran into trouble in Arlathan.”

He takes a few tentative steps closer. He wants to extend his hand, but some unknown force keeps it to his side, his entire body wound tighter than Harding’s bowstring.

If his body won’t move, his mouth will have to pay the balance.

“What happened? Are you alright?”

Rook winces and draws closer to the large wooden table.

“Rage demon” she answers, pulling out a chair by the fireplace “And I’m happy to report it lived up to its name! It wasn’t very happy to see us”

He pulls out a chair beside her. She turns to him and laughs bitterly, “Have you ever been burned and stabbed on a job? Because I found out what that feels like today, and it’s kind of awful. Thankfully Bellara was able to patch me up”

Lucanis looks down at her left leg. Whatever injury she sustained is covered by her pants, but he can surmise from the way she’s shifting nearly all her weight onto the other leg it must have been bad.

“You leave your left flank wide open when you fight” he says, absent-mindedly. And immediately wishes he hadn’t.

“What?”

Mierda.

“You have a habit of leaving your left flank open.” He says quickly, then looks into the fire. Anywhere but her confused face. “Something I’ve noticed on the field.”

He feels her staring. He’s said something he shouldn’t have said. He doesn’t know how to right it other than by offering her food as a distraction. Lucanis turns to his handiwork and reaches for the bowl of churros, all but thrusting it in front of her.

“Churro?” He asks hopefully.

If Rook is taken aback by the odd exchange, she has the manners not to say anything. She blinks twice and looks down at the dessert.

“You made this for me?” She tilts her head.

Lucanis rubs the back of his neck.

“I … yes” He sets the bowl back on the table after she gingerly takes one in her hand. He wonders if they’re as soft to touch as they appear. “I thought dessert might pair well with your stories”

Rook chuckles, and leans in closer “It’s a good thought”

Smells like Blood and Ashes and Brimstone, Spite’s anger reverberates through his chest. She’s supposed to smell like sweet things.

For once he’s grateful for the demon’s interjection as it keeps him from staring at her while she eats the churro. And licks the cinnamon sugar from her lips. He shouldn’t be paying attention to this.

“Mmm” she sighs, an expression of serene delight passing over her features. His chest tightens.

Rook grins, oblivious to the effect she has on him, “These are dangerous you know- you can’t keep making them for me or it’ll be all I’ll eat”

Lucanis sighs and pushes the chocolate and caramel sauces towards her. “You and Neve are peas in a pod evidently.”

Rook squeals in delight and wastes no time dipping the dessert into the chocolate sauce.

She prefers chocolate.

“So” He starts, awkwardly shifting in his seat, “What tale will you tell tonight?”

He pretends not to notice her wiping a smear of chocolate sauce from the corner of her lip with her finger.

“Oh, right” She reaches into her side pocket and pulls out the small journal. Rook flips through its pages, humming thoughtfully. She lands on a page near the end of the journal before stopping.

“This might be a good one.” Rook snaps the journal shut and places on the table beside her. “Have you ever heard the tale of Swan Lake?”

Even if he had, he would say no. If she wants to tell him a story, he won’t sway her.

“The original story is from Nevarra, but it was adapted into an Orlesian ballet some time ago” Rook continues, not giving him a chance to answer before barreling ahead with her explanation. “Apparently it was one of Emperor Judicael’s favourites. He liked it so much he had the ballet house play it nearly every night, and producers of the other ballet’s threatened to quit en masse. It was so bad, the play was actually banned in Orlais for about fifty years because of that whole debacle. Caused quite the scandal”

“Must be a good ballet” He remarks, before getting up from his seat. “Wait here for a moment, Rook”

Rook nods and reaches for another churro, “Sure”.

Lucanis returns with two steaming cups and passes one to Rook. She takes it gratefully and lifts the warm beverage to her nose. “Mmm! What is this? Smell’s divine”

“Cioccolata Calda. An Antivan specialty”

“Is it coffee?”

“Try it”

Rook does as she’s told and takes a curious sip. Her eyes widen and her lips split into a large smile. “That is amazing. I think I have a new favourite drink”

“They make it better at Café Pietra, but this will do for tonight” Lucanis sits back down and takes a sip of his own cup. It’s a little too sweet for him, but the look on her face assures him it was a good call. “If we find ourselves in Treviso again, we can –“

“I like the way you make things” Rook says quietly, gripping her cup a bit tighter. She’s looking down at her cup, and it’s probably for the better. He is certain the tips of his ears are a furious shade of red.

“Thank you” He whispers, after a few moments of quiet pass between the two. “That’s… very kind of you to say”

“You’re welcome” She replies, crossing her legs in her seat like she did yesterday. She looks like she wants to say something else, but a quick shake of her head and a clap of her hands brings her focus back to the reason she came here.

“Okay, umm, let’s see here” Rook’s gentle features twist in concentration.

Her hands begin glowing with that familiar blue light, and as she raises her arms and gives a flourish with her left hand.

A castle once again fills the empty space between their chairs. This one has a central dome surrounded by four gilded towers with pointed roofs – different in style and architecture from the one yesterday, but no less impressive.

“Once upon a time, in a kingdom far, far away, there lived a handsome and gentle prince by the name of Siegfried”

The castle ripples out of existence, and in its place, is the form of a young man with short, cropped hair, a broad chest, and a large bow on his back.

“Prince Siegfried was one of the most accomplished hunters in the kingdom. It was said he could hit any mark, no matter the distance. His aim would always be true. Some versions of the story mention his crossbow being enchanted, others chalk it up to pure skill. Either way, he’s a good shot” Rook grins and makes the figure of the Prince aim an arrow right at Lucanis’ chest with a crook of her finger.

Lucanis raises an eyebrow and holds his hands up in mock defense, “Tell the Prince he should stick to animals – I might be above his paygrade”

Rook bursts out into laughter and as her concentration breaks for a moment, the image of the Prince flickers in and out of existence.

“Sorry, carry on.” Lucanis smiles as she rights herself in her seat and places her hands back into position.

“Yes – where was I?” Rook flicks her wrist, and the Prince is back in view. This time, he’s joined by another figure. A tall woman, dressed in a long, flowing dress with an ornate crown on her head, comes to stand next to him.

“His mother, the Dowager Queen, comes to inform him of an upcoming ball that will be held at the royal palace. ‘At this ball, my son, you will choose a royal bride. For I am late in my years and wish to see grandchildren in these palace halls before I depart’” As before, the Queen’s mouth moves in rhythm with Rook’s words – like magical ventriloquism.

Rook waves her hand and the Queen disappears. The form of the prince cradles his head in his hands.

“The Prince is despondent at this news. He wanted to marry for love, not political power. Surely, he has a right to his own heart, at least?” The Prince sinks to his knees and stays like that for a few moments.

Another flourish from Rook, and a new figure appears. Shorter, portlier than the Prince, but with kinder features.

“His friend Benno sees how upset he is, and wonders how he can help cheer up the Prince”

Both figures disappear as Rook pauses to take a sip of her hot chocolate. He tries to ignore Spite’s impatient rippling at the edges of his consciousness.

Siegfried and Benno return soon thereafter.

“Benno looks out the window, and happens to see a flock of swans flying outside”

Rook waves the swans into existence, and they flit around Siegfried and Benno in circles before disappearing. The figure of Benno tugs on the prince’s shoulder sleeve.

“‘Your highness, a hunt!’ he exclaims, pointing out the window” The figure of the prince straightens, his interest piqued by the animals.

“Benno gathers a few other men from the castle, and along with the prince, they all ride out to the forest to hunt the swans”

The scene changes to Benno, Siegfried, and three other men riding horseback through a dense forest canopy. He will always be in awe of the imagery she’s able to bring to life with her magic. Never in a hundred years would he have thought of using magic in this way. Then again, Rook is anything but a typical mage, so he shouldn’t be surprised.

“At some point, Prince Siegfried becomes separated from the group”

One by one, Benno and the other men disappear, until only the prince remains, trotting horseback through the air on the spot.

“He comes to the lakeside clearing and finds the flock of swans.” The swans reappear, now floating on the edge of an invisible lake. The figure of the Prince draws his crossbow and pulls an arrow from the quiver. As he nocks the arrow, one of the swans transforms into a beautiful young woman. She has a long plait of hair spilling over her left shoulder. She’s wearing what Lucanis assumes, from its puffy construction, a ballet dress. The skirts are feathered, and feathers even fall from the dress, winking out of existence moments later.

He leans in closer to observe the finer details.

“You have quite the imagination, Rook” Lucanis smiles at her.

She returns it in kind and brushes a stray curl behind her ear. She looks shy, almost, and like she’s avoiding looking at him. “Some say over-active”

“I think it’s just right” He pulls back and takes a sip of his own hot chocolate.

“Thanks…” She whispers, drawing her legs closer together. When she sees her figures flickering again, Rook’s brows bunch together and the blue light in her hands grows brighter.

“The … ah … the Prince was so transfixed by her beauty and grace, he had to know more about her”

The figure of the prince begins moving closer to the woman, but the woman begins to back away.

“But she was frightened, for she did not know this man, and feared the crossbow in his hands”

“‘Wait!’ The prince calls just before she leaves his sight” The prince holds out his hand and tosses his crossbow to the ground. Well, the air. “‘Please stay, I’ve not a mind to hurt you. Won’t you tell me who you are?’”

The young woman stops and rests her hand on her chest.

“‘My name is Odette, and I cannot leave this place’”

“Why?” Lucanis is leaning forward, practically on the edge of his seat.

Rook leans in closer. Too close. Close enough to reach out and touch. Her large, doe-like green eyes, framed under long and wispy eyelashes, feel like they’re burning themselves into his soul.

Chocolate and cinnamon. Spite shrieks gleefully, and he wants to draw back. His heart throbs loudly in his ears, almost drowning out the demon. Almost.

“The prince had the same question” She winks and returns to her previous spot before he has the chance to pull away first.

“Odette explains she’s been placed under a curse by a powerful, but wicked mage. His name was Von Rothbart, and he was obsessed with Odette.”  

The prince disappears and is replaced by a taller man with hair tied behind his back and sharp, hawk-like features. He was dressed in a finely tailored doublet, with a side-cape hanging by a large broach affixed to the right shoulder. A faint red light shines from the broach.

“He kidnapped her from her home and used her blood to bind her soul to the gem in his broach. ‘Marry me’, he asks her every night. Every night she refuses. Every morning thereafter, she turns into a swan. And every night, she is called back to Swan Lake and turns back into a human. Such had been her fate for the last five years. It’s a powerful spell, born of ancient magic – but not an invulnerable one.”

Rook arced her hand over Odette, who’s form morphed from human to swan to human again with every back-and-forth motion of her palm.

He doesn’t have the words, none that will meaningfully add to the conversation at least, to describe how he feels about the way she uses her magic. Amazing, incredible, inventive all seem inadequate.

“There was one way to break Rothbart’s spell. A man would need to profess his love for her and remain faithful to that vow forevermore”

The figure of the prince kneels down on one knee, evidently ready to profess that love immediately.

Lucanis is resting his elbow on his knee, and his chin rests in his hand. His cup of hot chocolate rests forgotten by his side, as do the churros and croissants. He is certain she doesn’t realize how captivating she – her stories, are.

But they are interrupted by Rothbart, suddenly appearing beside Odette. He grabs her roughly by the arm and holds her beside him.

The prince stands with righteous anger. He has an arrow pointed at the figure of Rothbart.

“‘I shall slay this wicked mage, and free you from his grasp’” Siegfried declared”.

As the prince was about to loose the arrow, Lucanis is surprised to see Odette step in front of Rothbart, her arms spread wide in defense. The prince lowers his bow hesitantly.

A low growl escapes his throat, his eyes flash an angry violet “Why would she do that?” Lucanis’ voice is drowned by the deep and unnatural timbres of the demon, echoing together in a discordant symphony.

“Spite” Rook says calmly, like one would address a misbehaving child. “May I have Lucanis back so we can finish the story? You’ll find out why in a moment”

Lucanis’ face contorts with frustration. His violet eyes burn bright with anger, “Want. To know”

“You will, soon. Now bring Lucanis back”

Lucanis – well, Spite, growls again. When the demon refuses to relent, Rook hesitantly touches his forearm and frowns. “Please?”

The violet in his eyes dims, and Lucanis shakes his head. It was rare for Spite to surge to the forefront so quickly.

He couldn’t understand why the princess would protect someone who hurt her.

Lucanis takes a deep breath, and exhales slowly.

“Are you alright?” Rook asks quietly. The figures are long gone now, dissipated by the distraction that was Spite.

He realizes she’s still touching his forearm. Warm, and calming. Gentle. They both look down and she quickly pulls away. He feels the withdrawal of her warmth like gust of cold settling on his skin.

“Yes, I’m fine – don’t worry” He gestures to her, “Please, continue with your story”

Rook still looks hesitant, like she doesn’t quite believe him. He wouldn’t either, he supposed. He needs her to continue the story. Needs to distract himself from the feeling of her soft fingers lingering on his skin, like a brand.

She relents and her hands glow blue again.

The three figures of Siegfried, Odette, and Rothbart return.

“Odette explains that her life is tied to Von Rothbart. If he dies, then the spell imprisoning her can never be broken”

The figure of Rothbart retreats into a deeper part of the forest she’s conjured.

Odette and Siegfried share an embrace.

“’Come to the royal ball in three days’ time. There, I will profess my love to you in front of the entire court’ Says the Prince, resolved to defy his mother and marry her instead of a princess.”

The figure of Odette nods and disappears soon after.

“What they don’t know is that Rothbart heard the entire exchange, and he had a plan to make sure Odette could never escape him” Rook frowned.

The prince disappears next, and they are back with Rothbart and another young woman. This one slender and petite, with the same sharp features as the man next to her.

“Rothbart had a plan. He would use magic to disguise himself” Rook waved a hand and Rothbart morphed into the dress and appearance of an unassuming peasant. “And his daughter, Odile” She waved her hand again, and the young woman became an identical copy of Odette – but her dress, was glowing with an ominous black light.

“There’s no way that’ll work” Lucanis throws his arms up and leans back in his chair. “He has to know that Rothbart won’t just let her waltz into the ball”

Rook merely shrugs, “You’ll have to wait and see”

Lucanis crosses his arms over his chest and frowns. “Continue”

Rook laughs, “Alright, alright”

Odile and Rothbart disappear. They are replaced by a grand ballroom floor, with guests dressed in all sorts of finery decorating the dance floor like little spinning jewels.

At the top of a grand staircase sees Benno, Siegfried, and the Queen gathered together.

“Siegfried anxiously awaits the arrival of Odette” Rook explains, before waving her hand and bringing to life the disguised figures of Rothbart and Odile-as-Odette.

“Overcome with joy when he sees her, he immediately asks her to dance”

The two come together, and the rest of the ballroom disappears. They twirl about the ballroom in an elegant pas-de-deux.

“At the end of the dance, Odile asks him one simple question”

The pair part, and the prince drops to one knee in front of her.

“’Do you love me, and only me?’”

Lucanis watches intently as the figure of the prince bows his head in front of the pretender.

Sadness washes over Rook’s face. “The Prince, none the wiser, proclaims his love to the entire court ‘Of course I love you’ – but it wasn’t enough. Rothbart, masquerading as the girl’s father, asks him to make a binding vow in front of the Queen. Siegfried, thinking nothing of it, does so immediately”

Rook waves her hand and the figures of Rothbart and Odile return to their original forms. Suddenly, the real Odette, in her pure white dress, is inside the ballroom. She crumples to the floor as she witnesses the Prince profess his love for Odile.

“Odette, heartbroken, flees the ball and returns to the lakeside clearing. The prince follows after her, distraught at what he’s done.”

The two figures stand in front of each other on the lake.

“Odette eventually forgives him, realizing that he was under Rothbart’s spell just as much as she was. But the damage was done. His actions consigned her to live as a swan forevermore”

Lucanis frowned, unable to see a path to a happy ending. But Rook was full of surprises, maybe her stories were as well.

“Odette and the Prince resolved to leave this world together, rather than be bound by Rothbart’s magic”

The figures of Siegfried and Odette walk towards the lake, hand in hand. They slowly sink together under the willowy depths.

Well, he wasn’t expecting that.

A moment later, they both disappear under the water.

The figure of Rothbart returns into view. The red light of the broach on his shoulder flickers in and out, before dying out completely. Rothbart collapses to the ground and remains still.

“It’s true that Odette’s life was bound to Rothbart’s – but the magic worked both ways. Rothbart’s life was also tied to hers. And when she left this world of her own will, he left it against his”

A moment later, Rothbart disappears and in his place are two ghostly swans, flying in circles together.

“The spirits of Siegfried and Odette are reunited in the Fade, until they decide to pass on together”

With a final flick of her wrist, the birds disappear, and there is nothing but empty space between him and Rook again.

“The End”

Lucanis exhaled.

“Not the most cheerful ending” He remarks, taking another sip of hot chocolate.

“What was it you said about that one brew at Café Pietra? Bitter and sweet - like a kiss goodbye?” Rook nods and absent-mindedly chews on another churro. “That’s how I think about this ending. Not every story has an overtly happy one”

He’s dumbfounded she even remembers that throwaway comment.

“I still don’t understand how the prince doesn’t question Odette appearing at the ball. With a father she hasn’t seen in five years, supposedly” He wants to change the subject. Away from kisses, goodbye or otherwise.

Rook shrugs, “That’s a question for the author- though he’s likely about four hundred year’s dead.” A light twinkles in her eyes, “Maybe we can find him here, in the Fade, and ask his spirit!”

Lucanis laughs, “Now there’s an idea”

“I’m full of them. Some better than others” Rook grins sheepishly. She begins massaging the side of her left leg.

“What’s wrong?” He asks, following her gaze down.

“Nothing – it’s just starting to ache a bit” Rook winces. “That demon got me good”

“Let me see” Lucanis drops to his knee in front of her. “If that’s alright”

Rook removes her hand and drops her gaze to look at him.

“Oh – it’s fine, Lucanis, really. I’ll bug Bellara about it in the morn- “

“It’s better if you bug me about it now. It might get worse over the course of the night”

He gestures to her pant leg, “May I?” He asks again.

Rook bites her lip, before relenting. “Sure… go ahead” she answers softly and lifts her leg so he can support it in his right hand.

He clicks his tongue when he sees the damage under her dressing. The lateral portion of her lower leg is covered with an irritated and inflamed superficial burn. Three parallel gash marks, likely closed thanks to Bellara’s healing magic, create tracts of bright crimson skin. She hisses when he gently presses on the skin of her leg.

“I have something for this. Wait here” He carefully lowers her leg and returns a moment later with a small jar from the pantry.

“Embrium and Elfroot paste, good for burns and skin irritation. It’ll also prevent infection. Apply it twice a day” He sets the jar on the table beside her. “Let me know if that gets worse”

Rook grins, “I didn’t know I was getting a doctor and an assassin in my contract”

Lucanis chuckles, “Any Crow worth their salt knows how to close a wound just as well as they can open one. Consider it on the house”

“Is the all the cooking on the house too?” Rook slowly stands up, and they’re only a few inches away from each other now.

Lucanis nervously rubs the back of his neck, “I think it has to be, with the way you people eat”

“Hey! I’m not that bad” She places her hands on her hips and frowns. “I eat vegetables … sometimes”

“I’ve seen you pick out the eggplant in every dish”

“Okay, I don’t like one vegetable”

She shakes her head and gathers a few churros and croissants onto a plate. Rook sticks a croissant in her mouth, and speaks around it, “Just for that, I’m eating nothing but these for the next two days”

“You’re going to miss Paella night” He deadpans.

Rook swallows and places another croissant defiantly on her plate.

“Three nights”

Lucanis sighs. At least she seems to like the food.

Rook’s laughter fills the dining hall. “On that note – I should get some sleep. I hope Spite doesn’t give you too much trouble for the rest of the night”

“He won’t” Lucanis doesn’t know that but says it to give her some reassurance. “Good night, Rook”

“Madeleina”

“What?”

“My name … it’s Madeleina. You can call me that if you want” She smiles widely. “Rook is fine too, though”

“Madeleina” He repeated softly. He smiled, and for the first time all night, he feels like he can keep her gaze. Their eyes meet, and it feels like an entirely new conversation is happening between them. “It suits you”

Rook toys with an errant curl and smiles. “Thank you”

“I – umm… I should get going. Goodnight, Lucanis” she adds quickly.

She quickly rights herself and for good measure, steals one more churro from the bowl. Madeleina then turns and begins hobbling out of the dining hall, leaving Lucanis and Spite to mull the feeling of her new name over in his mind.

He would have to thank Neve for her advice.

[overtaken-stream]

What's your opinion on Katakuri being a dad ^-^, ik he doesnt pull out

Father!Katakuri headcanons

This is all my brain can come up with. It's a bit short, and I'm not satisfied with this, I feel like I could have added more, thus this has been collecting dust in my drafts. I hope you like it anon.

Warnings: End of Wano spoilers, this is meant for F!Reader.

I imagine he had children after Big Mom passed. Or a few years before she died, and of course, the marriage was arranged once Big Mom realized that she might just be left without any offspring from her third child.

And as much as I'd like to get lost in Father Katakuri, I can not ignore the warning signs this road presents.

The man doesn't see his children often enough. He always wanted to spend time with his family, but in this job, that isn't possible. Big Mom often holds his family over his head, making empty promises about him having a week off to help take care of the children, only to call him back before the sun rises on the fourth day. He had the courage to ask her for more time at the beginning, or to not disturb him during that single week where he spends time in metaphorical paradise with kids whom he loves and his partner whom he tries to shower with affection. He asked that of her once and when Big Mom does not deliver, Katakuri learns to cope with the dissatisfaction, it's a song he has heard of all his life, he knows every word and note that plays, he wants nothing more than to stop listening so that his kids don't step away from him again. It's impossible, and he comes to terms that he won't have that fatherly privilege. He feels like a stranger around the kids. No amount of comfort will be able to hide the truth.

It isn't the first time Big Mom pushed away a father from his biological children.

Although his time with his kids is short, it's always full of adorable moments, Katakuri is trying very hard to be a father even with his mother standing in his way.

I see Katakuri as a father of 3. Two girls and one boy, who is the youngest.

The man loves sweets, donuts, chocolate bars, cinnamon buns, and all, so he will be DEVASTATED if one of his kids isn't a big fan of sweets. He'll try to make them change their mind, maybe persuading them to eat a different kind of dessert, but once it becomes clear that they aren't into it, he accepts the fact with great pain, since he cannot share the simple pleasure of eating sugar with his child.

Katakuri often can't get his emotions across to others, including his siblings, but with his children, he tries, he really tries. This can be seen in spending quick yet platonically intimate moments with them alone and making small talk that he isn't a big fan of.

He also hopes that when the children grow up, there won't be any distance between them, it's basically a death sentence for him.

The moment Big Mom dies, Katakuri is finally able to keep his promise to his family and breathe with no one holding his leash.

I also think of him as a laid-back father who's strict when needed. His behavior is the result of countless years he spent mulling over his future family and what type of parent he would be. So this led to him walking on metaphorical eggshels that he imagined every time he got close to his children. Which they definitely took for granted.

Katakuri is very careful with his children because of it, I'd say that he is so scared that the kids would build a wall and be mad at him for not spending enough time with them that the man unconsciously started constructing the said wall.

[blue-sadie]

I Thought-

Alpha Neteyam x Omega Reader

Summary: neteyam doesn’t always know how to express his feelings and cuts people out when he's angry even his little omega

Warning: modern day au, omegaverse au, almost reader death

Yn/3rd person pov

My body tensed on the couch, my hands clutching the woolen blanket tightly as I heard the slamming of the front door, my nose crinkling at the small of his anger.

"For fuck sake" he yelled throwing his belongings onto the floor making clashes and clungs of his fallen items.

I sunk back into the plushy cushions as my eyes meet his angered ones "h-hi neteyam" I whispered loud enough for him to hear me he only growled in response before stomping his way to our bedroom and slammed the door again.

My ears flattened against my head as I heard him yell out his frustrations but an idea popped into my head and I got right to work, jumping up from my spot and racing into the kitchen and getting all the ingredients I needed.

I grabbed my apron and tied it tightly around my waist and washed my hands before getting to work chopping, preparing and cooking I was making his favorite dish his mom gave me the recipe for and once all of that was slowly cooking I got to work on the dessert.

I tempered and iced the chocolate cake and once that was done I wiped my forehead admiring all my work and I did the final step which was setting the table with some freshly cut flowers.

I quickly cleaned myself up before making my way to our bedroom and softly knocked on the door "what" he muttered from inside the room "I-I made dinner for you" I murmured opening the door my eyes drifting to the door where he lay just staring up at the ceiling.

"I'm not hungry" he said his eyes only finding my for a second before returning to the ceiling "but I made you favorite and while we're eating we can talk-" he interrupted me by giving me a glare "I am not hungry omega" he yelled out.

My lip quivered he never called me omega he said it was to demeaning and hurtful I nodded quietly and closed the door again and made my way into the dining and ate by myself.

I couldn't eat much though my omega was stressing over him I couldn't even look at the cake the thought of it just made me nauseous, I quickly finished my food and wrapped the rest up and left it in the fridge for him to eat and I left the cake on the counter covered so no ants could get to it.

I walked to the bedroom and stood by the door at least for 30 seconds debating if I wanted to sleep in there or not my mood only worsened with each passing second was it me who caused him to be like this was he angry at me.

I shook my head trying to block out the negative thoughts as I made my way to the guest room slumping down onto the bed but I just couldn't fall asleep my omega was crying for attention but I knew I wouldn't be getting any anytime soon.

I twisted and turned but couldn't fall asleep no matter how hard I tried my eyes were starting to become sore and my muscles started to arch I just slowly got up and made my way into the guest bathroom and filled up the tube.

"Maybe this is help" I slowly pulled off my clothes before hissing as I settled into the steaming hot water the water slowly relaxing my muscles, I tried relaxing more by closing my eyes but I couldn't get him out my mind.

I looked to the side where I saw a bottle of medication I quickly leaned over curiously and grabbed it and read the name it was addressed to my mother 'she must have left it here by accident'.

I looked at the label and it was sleeping pills I thought for a minute before uncapping the bottle and taking to out "maybe the will help" I murmured and put the rest of the bottle back onto the counter before swallowing the pills.

I sat around waiting for them to start working just getting a little more comfortable in the bath, my eye lids slowly started becoming more heavier and my breath more slower as the pills started to take effect.

My body slowly started to sink into the water but I was to tired to do anything and my mind was to distracted to the hear the slight padding of footsteps drawing nearer.

Neteyam couldn't sleep either he could never sleep without you so here he was looking into the guest bedroom where he thought you were and when you weren't there his eye brows frowned.

He looked back down the hallway his eyes only softening once he saw the sliver of light coming from the bathroom he walked over and softly knocked like you did before "baby" he called.

But he was only met with silence "yn im really sorry" but when he didn't get an answer this time an unsettling feeling started to fill his heart "baby if you don't answer I'm coming in" he threatened worryingly knocking a bit louder.

He quickly opened the door when he didn't get a response his eyes widening and his heart breaking as he runs and scoops her out of the water "baby" he screamed laying her onto the ground and started listening for her heartbeat.

He sighed in relief ae he heard it but quickly started cpr as it was fading "fuck" he cried as tears started welling up in his eyes "he quickly got his phone and dialed 911 "911 what's your emergency" the lady spoke.

"Hi my girlfriend was found in the bath she's not breathing and she has a heartbeat but it's fading" he rushed breathing heavily as he continued cpr "ok hold on I'm sending someone now" she tried calming neteyam down but he was to frantic.

He quickly wrapped you in a towl and picked you up as he heard the nearing sirens and rushed outside "please help her" he screamed the medics quickly rushed you inside and neteyam followed and held your hand tightly as they rushed to the hospital "please be ok".

-Time skip-

Lo'aks nose crinkled as he entered the room "dude you need to shower" he chuckled but shut up as neteyam glared at him "I am not going anywhere" he growled repeating the same words that he said to everyone else.

He never left your side once he just sat there clutching your hand tightly waiting for you to wake up "so did the doctor say anything" lo'ak asked as he stood at the foot of your bed.

Neteyam sighed heavily "he said whatever she took knocked her out and her omega is the reason she's still asleep" he said tiredly "what does he mean by that" "it means I fucked up ok" neteyam snapped.

Neteyam started to cry again "I fucked up I shut her out and I think her omega may have taken it to seriously and now she's like this because of me" lo'ak watched his eyes filled with sorrow for his brother.

"She almost died because of me" he sniffled staring at your face praying to see your eyes open "I'm the reason she's here" he whispered and softly kissed your hand.

"I love you omega please forgive me"

Tag.List

@grilledcheese23

@greekgods15

@sweetirilly

[no-psi-nan]

Saiki K ships with the most canon evidence, RANKED:

#5) Teruhashi x Saiki

#4) Yumehara x Kaido [NEW]

#3) Toritsuka x Saiki

#2) Aiura x Saiki

#1 ) Nendo x Saiki

Reasoning in Brief:

#1) Nendo x Saiki

Nendo is the longest running character in the series after Saiki himself and immediately starts calling Saiki "aibou"/partner after Saiki saves him from a false accusation and he "saves" Saiki from bullies. Saiki uses his powers pretty freely in front of Nendo and Nendo always protects him, most notably at the end of the series when Saiki "loses" his powers. Saiki's bond with Nendo is so strong that even Nendo's father immediately gets attached to him in the past, and Nendo Sr.'s ghost is the only one he can see without Toritsuka's help. The second light novel states that without Nendo, Saiki would never have made friends with any other characters.

#2) Aiura x Saiki

Aiura's predictions are 100% correct according to canon and this is never contradicted. Saiki works with Aiura flawlessly in saving Yumehara's life multiple times in a row. Aiura's help was pivotal in stopping the volcano and she even helps in the cat tank arc despite not being physically involved. Aiura disagrees with Saiki's official stance of not helping others (though he's a liar who helps anyways) and they both grow as characters through the disagreement. By the end of the series, Saiki willingly accepts all of her invitations to go out for dessert alone together while knowing that she considers it a date and that she wants to have his babies.

"What if Aiura meant platonic soulmates?" <- every single one of Aiura's compatibility ratings and the other soulmate prediction given were explicitly romantic, unlike Saiki's favorability meter which seems to work with both platonic, romantic, and even parasocial relationships.

#3) Toritsuka x Saiki

#5) Teruhashi x Saiki

Toritsuka is allowed to physically hug Saiki at school in public even though everyone knows Toritsuka as The Germ and it could screw Saiki's reputation big-time. The cat tank arc literally has them saving each other's lives. Incredible amount of homoeroticism, particularly in the 3-days fasting chapter.

#4) Yumehara x Kaido

@mikosaishipper made a convincing argument here!

While they have the most explicitly romance-coded screentime of every pairing by far, Saiki never willingly goes out with Teruhashi and never considers telling her the truth about his powers. Teruhashi also never gets to find out about Saiki's real personality and struggles to compliment him even towards the end of the series. Teruhashi also doxxes Saiki to her simps in the invisible milkshake-stealing chapter even though she thinks giving Saiki any Valentine's chocolates in public would lead to both his death and WWIII.

#6) Kuboyasu x Saiko

Why didn't X ship make it to the top 5?

> Kuboyasu x Kaido

[UPDATE] Got knocked down by new arguments for Yumehara x Kaido, see the discussion above.

Homoerotic rivalry practically drips from every single interaction they have. Nuff said tbh.

Way more bro-coded than romantic. Kaido turns red at the thought of hand-holding, if there was canon gayness then it would be obvious.

> Akechi x Saiki

Akechi only got approximately 3.5 seconds of screentime 😔

> Nendo x Hairo

That was a joke bonus panel. Also, as much as Hairo considers Nendo to be his rival (even though he freaking cheats against him...), Nendo never seems to reciprocate, rip...

> Kuniharu x Kurumi

First chapter of the serialized Saiki manga is domestic violence between them over one (1) supermarket coffee jelly.

[gumballavocadoharry]

Pet names Harry calls you; Headcanons:

Baby: To him you are like a baby. He squishes your cheeks with kisses and rubs your face with his hands. It's an intimate word he uses with you because you're his.

Doll: Your face is like a doll's. Beautiful, round and unique. You can make dolly eyes and these shiny lips that felt fluttery pressing against Harry's cheek. Your face is so innocent, making Harry want to let his fingers graze over your soft skin.

Angel: Your innocence and honesty makes you an angel to him. Sweet, kind, brave and sensitive is more than Harry would imagine in a woman and to him, you're heaven's sent gift to him.

Bunny: Your energy. You go from one place to the next, and you're always willing to go with Harry on any tour or vacation or adventure. Harry loves the time he spends with you, and feels incredibly lonely when you're not there.

Honey: Your sweetness makes Harry attracted to you. He stops to think of you just to smile. A dull day can feel bright when Harry's with you.

Kitten: Like a cat, so careful and cautious, yet curious and delicate, Harry sees you like this. He wants to hold you in his arms, caress your hair and snuggle his nose to your face. Just cuddling you tightly, not ever wanting to let go.

Love: Basic, he loves you to death. You're the love of his life and his everything.

Sweetheart/Sweetie: Your precious to Harry. Almost childlike but mature for him. Harry likes to wrap you in this protective grasp while you're both in bed or on the couch. He sees his future in you as his wife. You're his sweetie, his girlfriend, his life.

Princess: A true princess in his eyes. Beautiful and posh. Harry would take you in his arms and dance with you in the living while calling you princess; looking deep into your eyes and kissing you passionately.

Beautiful: He greets you with "Hey beautiful," in the morning, even with the mud mask or eye mask on your face, your hair messy and your voice raspy. Harry kisses your cheek before hopping from the bed and making breakfast for you and him.

Darling: A treasure to Harry. You're his darling, a person who he holds dear to him. Harry calls you this when you need to hear it the most.

Love bug: A cute fun nickname Harry says to express those fluttery feelings he has towards you. He'll rub your nose and repeat it over and over with a cooing tone, smothering your face in millions of kisses.

Boo boo: A pet name that makes you blush when said in public at a party. A drunk Harry will loudly say it at a party, lengthening it to "boo boo bear" and ask you for kisses. It somewhat embarrasses you, when Harry's clingy to you and expects you to hold his hand and he just puckers kisses to your little cheeks. It does give you this warm flush of love more than embarrassment.

Pumpkin: Harry sees you little. You're smaller than him and he dominates you in height. He smushes your cheeks in his hands and will baby you just to see you frown a little. Then he'll kiss the crinkles on your forehead and say "I love you."

Sugar: When Harry's in a romantic mood, he'll say it yo summon you to the bedroom. He'll whisper in your ear and pick you up and take you to bed.

Baby girl: You're his baby. Whether you like it or not, Harry sees you as a little bean and he'll protect you and baby you for love. Had a bad day at work? Harry will rub your feet and sing for you. Sick in bed with the flu? Expect doctor Harry to feed you soup and cuddle you along with your warm blankets.

Flower: Harry tells you how he would wish on dandelions for someone like you. His wish came true months later.

Cupcake: One of your favorite desserts, Harry calls you this when he thinks of cupcakes, he thinks of you. He'll walk past a bakery and see chocolate cupcakes frosted with purple or blue frosting and immediately thinks of you which is how you end up with a dozen cupcakes on your desk at home.

Muffin: One of his favorite treats. Your his muffin when he bakes soft gooey chocolate chip muffins for the morning to go along with your oatmeal or yogurt. He adds sweet little notes to them like: I'll be at the studio all day, muffin. Don't forget your lunch for work.

Buttercup: When Harry's feeling extra lovey dovey, he calls you this when he needs to protect you. He knows your a sweets addict and will buy you bunches of treats to make you happy.

Bon bon: Like a chocolate bon bon, Harry sees you like this little sweet treat that blast flavor into your mouth. So creamy and sweet but not too rich.

Teddy Bear: When Harry's away, he dreams of you and craves to hold you like a teddy bear. He imagines holding your hand in his and feeling the skin of your body pressed against his. The smell of you lingers through him and he just wants you to be like a teddy to him to sleep with at night.

Poppet: Like a poppy seed, Harry is fiercely protective of you and will throw himself in to keep you safe.

Cookie: When you're eating cookies, Harry will call you this as a play on word.

Babe: You're his baby girl, he tells you this when you fall asleep on his bare chest, tracing his butterfly tattoo with your finger. His fingers comb through your hair and he just listens to the sound of your breathing in and out with the sync of his heartbeat.

Gorgeous: When you don't feel pretty, Harry will tell you otherwise and tell you all the features of you that he finds enticingly beautiful.

Wifey: When Harry decides to finally keep you forever, he'll hit one knee and ask you to be his wife. You'll say yes and share the promises of your rings together and live happily as husband and wife.

[sepherinaspoppies]

Only If For A Night (sneak peek)

His grip on her hand tightened more as she did not touch any of the food and drinks placed on their feasting dinner table. Aemond knew she was hungry, her eyes were practically devouring the sweet treats he demanded to be brought from Dorne just for the special occasion of their wedding. 

“You should eat, my love.” Aemond advised, briefly letting go of her hand to gather a slice of chocoflan he knew it was her favorite. It wasn’t how it was made in her world but it was made with the intention and hope of gaining her affection for him. 

“I’m not hungry,” she replied, pushing the plate away. The gruesome images of the two old ladies who violently got their heads cut off because of her attempt to escape, were stuck on her head. She did not think she could eat or sleep after seeing the face of death stare directly at her. Her own mother warned her once, when her uncle was in hospice, to never look at the face of death for the image would permanently be firmly fixated in her head. 

And it was. 

Aemond frowned and sighed. It did not go unnoticed to him that she didn’t spare him a single glance. Rather, she looked at the drunken men and women dancing in the great hall of Harrenhal. She wondered if they too were forced to be here, feigning their happiness to not upset the One Eyed Prince. 

“I know you are hungry. I can practically hear your belly making noises from where I am sitting.” He slid back the silver plate directly in front of her. “Here, have a piece. It is quite good, I can understand why you like it so much.” She involuntarily flinched when Aemond cut a piece of the dessert and practically shoved it inside her mouth. 

“Besides, you need your energy for tonight’s activities.” Aemond smirked, his voice coming out dark and erotic as he brought his thumb to clean the loose chocolate from her bottom lip back into her mouth. Her chest began to heave heavily in panic as Aemond traced the softness and plumpness of her lips. He imagined what they’d feel like when she finally accepted his kisses or how they’d feel wrapped so sweetly around his cock.

“I can’t have my beautiful bride faint while I make love to her.” 

Like hell that was gonna happen! Alys, you puta, you better take me out of this! 

“Um, I need to use the bathroom,” She stated, standing up from her chair. Aemond tilted his head in confusion, any trace of salaciousness was swiftly gone. Right, he didn’t know what that meant. What the fuck did they call it here in Westeros? “What I mean is that I need to relieve myself. I drank too much water.” She laughed anxiously, hoping that Aemond would believe her as she crossed her legs. 

Please. 

Aemond lifted a brow, “Be quick.” He nodded before he waved for a guard to escort her to the privy. 

She momentarily sighed in relief. She had to devise a new plan, a better attempt to escape Aemond’s delusional ass. This was not her world. This was just a book she had countlessly read in her spare time. No way was Aemond Targaryen real nor his dragon, Vhagar. 

Once she left in Aemond’s line of sight, he brought his wife’s silver chalice for inspection and tossed it against the wall once he saw that the cup was full and untouched. She lied to him, again.  

“Fuck!” Aemond bellowed loud and high for everyone to hear. 

Clever girl, my bride is, thinking she could escape me yet again

*puta: bitch

[cheesecakeislazy]

Hey, I hope you have a nice day. I also hope you enjoy MORE FUCKIN HEADCANONS WOOOOOOO

Sally Headcanons

1. While yes, Sally loves the color pink, it isn’t actually her favorite color. She doesn’t have one. She loves blue, green, purple, all colors.

2. The only color Sally dislikes is orange, due to this, she hates oranges and tangerines

3. Sally has the body of a 7-10 year old, yet she is mentally older.

4. Despite the fact Sally is mentally 16, she still has childlike characteristics within her mindscape

5. Sally has a hard time trusting adult men; females and younger males are more trustworthy to Sally

6. Mr. D (Sally’s teddy bear) is a normal teddy bear

7. Every single person inside the mansion has seen Mr. D move on his own; nobody knows how or why as Slender has confirmed it has no supernatural tendencies within it

8. Sally likes to watch Bluey

9. Sally likes to hang out with BeN, Jeff, and Toby; viewing all three of them as older brothers

10. Jeff and Sally hang out the most

11. Sally used to have a little kid crush on Ben; Sally no longer views BeN that way because she thinks that dating is gross

12. Sally is AroAce in my AU, because despite physically being 7, she’s mentally around 16

13. Sally constantly asks Slender for a puppy

14. Sally hates wearing socks

15. Sally also hates wearing shoes of any kind

16. Sally doesn’t leave footprints anywhere, not in snow, mud, anything.

17. When Sally has tantrums Jeff calls them her “poltergeist attacks”

18. When upset, Sally can make objects levitate.

19. Sally usually throws the objects she levitates, due to the fact the objects are usually plates, vases, cups, and Toby- Damage is always present after a Sally tantrum

20. Sally cannot levitate objects on command.

21. Sally calls Slender “Mr. Slenderman”

22. Sally gave Slender a white mug that had “#1 Mr.Slenderdad” written with black sharpie on it

23. Sally isn’t an innocent little girl, she also loves to commit war crimes

24. Sally usually kills creeps, molesters, perverts, etc.

25. Sally has constant bruises and cuts on her from her death

26. The wound on Sally’s head eternally bleeds forever, it’s annoying but she’s gotten used to it

27. Slender puts bandages around her head to somewhat stop the bleeding

28. Sally and Jane argue a lot

29. Jeff managed to convince Sally that Jane is a bitch

30. Sally is a Princess Peach main in MarioKart

31. Sally is one of the few people that Ben likes to play board games with because she doesn’t destroy the game board/pieces

32. Sally likes to play house and dress up

33. Sally serves real tea and desserts at her tea parties

34. Sally doesn’t really know how to defend herself, so she can’t go on intense missions or go on missions alone

35. Sally is 4’5

36. Sally needs to be babysat whenever a majority of the mansion is on an expedition

37. Babysitting duty is rotated around the mansion

38. Jane hates babysitting duty because Sally never listens to her

39. Jeff is rarely on it but when he is, he loves it

40. Most of the proxies see Sally extremely often but don’t really know her

41. If given the chance, Sally will cling onto Slenderman all day

42. Sally loves Ben’s brownies (the not weed ones)

43. Sally loves chocolate chip cookies

44. Sally and Lulu are decent friends

45. Sally and Lazari have play dates together

46. Sally and Lazari share a room in the mansion

47. Sally and Smile dog have a complicated relationship

48. Sally loves Smile Dog because he’s a dog and constantly tries to play with him

49. Smile dog.. is an intelligent dog that usually wants to be left alone; he doesn’t hate Sally he just finds her a lot to deal with

50. Sally used to be really bad at painting nails, now she’s actually quite good at it due to BEN teaching her

51. Sally likes to draw and finger paint

52. Sally’s art skills are the same of a preschooler (aka fucking awesome)

53. Sally has a bad habit of randomly falling asleep; Slenders arms, Slenders tentacles, tea parties, while standing up, taking a bath, etc.

54. Sally likes fruit punch and grape juice

55. Sally likes to say Fuck (Jeff taught her)

[vulpinroid]

"Caramel macchiato? Did you remember the chocolate chips?"

"And- the whipped cream on top..." "And this is exactly why after I'm doing drinking this, I'm going to install a Wi-Fi module in you. You know, for something that's been offline since the days of Backstreet Boys, 'NSYNC and Britney Spears, you still catch on pretty quick! Then again, that's your my favorite floofy Motor City murderbot. Good boy!"

"-Look Rebecca, that's dessert, not coffee. I should have kept my muzzle shut about that combination years ago."

"Your point, Officer Prower?"

"Nothing, nothing at all Professor Chambers."

"I'd buy that for a dollar!"

--

Resident Evil x RoboCop AU where a prototype 'RoboCop 2000' or RC-2000 is developed and assigned to Raccoon City as an attempt for OCP to recover its flagging fortunes after 'RoboCop 2' and 'RoboCop: Rogue City', using a critically injured anthropomorphic fox Detroit patrolman as the basis.

Compared to the original, the RC-2000 has a full-fledged AI modeled on its template containing his full range of memories, skills, emotive profile and the like. The underlying technology is also six years newer and the signature Beretta 93R sidearm is upgraded to a .45 ACP variant. A second 93R is also included and the newer operating system contains multi-targeting capability similar to that of 'RoboCable' from RoboCop: Prime Directives.

On arrival in Raccoon City, Security Concepts placed the RC-2000's upkeep under the responsibility of RPD STARS Bravo Team medic Rebecca Chambers.

Taking over the rear security role from Rebecca, the RC-2000 ultimately was instrumental to a different outcome in Resident Evil 0 and Resident Evil 1, resulting in:

A cohesive sweep of the Ecliptic Express, Umbrella Executive Training Center and the Spencer Mansion with Bravo Team remaining together increasing survivability.

The detainment of Dr. William Birkin while en route to a meeting Wesker.

Wesker's perma-death.

The RC-2000 being damaged in a confrontation with the Tyrant, prompting Rebecca to leave Raccoon City after the raid in order to further her career, but also to make an effort to repair the robot, who she formed an attachment to.

Rebecca took over his 1992 Ford Taurus SHO patrol car as her own personal vehicle, removing the police equipment but retaining the coloration and his RPD unit callsign (308) on the side.

This was successful as of 2014 before the events of Vendetta with rumor being that she woke him up with a rather terrible piano rendition of the Moonlight Sonata.

Other Trivia:

His name is supposedly Miles Prower and his birthday is recorded as being October 16, 1980, with a record of him graduating from Wayne State University in 1996 with a criminal justice degree and a minor in physics.

He gets very flustered when she calls him a 'good boy'.

Rumor is that Miles is the one who put Rebecca on her signature caramel macchiato with chocolate chips and whipped cream.

[valentine-cafe]

Can i make a request for a sakura pudding and for an unnamed, i believe, dessert,

🥺i wanna ask, for shimada takara, and also Yŭ Xī 1311, what about them just, going out of their house for some reason but stopping in their tracks cause wait, what are all those flowers doing there it's like a new garden- oh these are bouquets!! All for them!! Cause the reader appreciates them very much🥺♥️

No I don't have a soft spot for them what do you mean??? Preposterous

˖⁺. ﹙the ever-smiling killer kitsune, the grim reaper wrath  & gn reader. ﹚ .𖹭 ݁

. . . to you, my best friend !! 🍒 :  grim reaper ˖ kitsune ˖ ﹙ 1311 Yu Xi & 9948e Takara . ﹚

a whole garden of bouquets, for the beloved genderfluid kitsune of 9948e and grim reaper 1311

“oh my death — o fuck, oh death, oh all of the nadir—”

yŭ xī would look around in such shock, turning their head from side to side while blinking frantically.

this had to be their imagination acting up, right?!

no — it really was all sorts of bouquets awaiting them. orchids, marigolds, lilies, bluebells, a grand array of so many flowers. it makes them tear up just at the thought of it.

tears are wiped away from their eyes by a dry sleeve, as they smile and slowly begin picking each and every one of the vases, bouquets, baskets — everything left for them. gods, even wine?! CHOCOLATES!?!?!?!??

who arranged this for them?! they have no idea. but the genderfluid reaper was ever happy to have this much appreciation shown to them.

they waddle back inside their house to rearrange all of the spots and it shines with all of the new plants to their plant family home. rishen is gonna call it a forest flower grove the next time he comes to visit.

with a few happy taps of their feet to the ground. they put aside that walk down to town to search for something to do and immediately find some vases and plant kits for settling the bouquets in shelves and corners of their room.

with ecstatic eyes flickering all around the ground below their treehouse, and their jaw slack. the kitsune jumps once, twice, happily and excitedly.

they make their way to the ground and begin collecting all of the bouquets, squealing and making their fox noises. while aggresively swaying themself from side to side.

“SOGFRDIJSEÆFDOIJEGÆKJSFLÆOKJGFLOÆIJSDLFOIJ SO MANY FLOWERS.” they exclaim, crawling up and down the ladder to put flowers and bouquets into their house. saving it in their stash. casting spells of lasting on them so the flowers do not wilt and rot.

and as they put the last few bunches into the house, they catch you walking towards the house with another bouquet, unaware they have already seen all of the other ones.

what else can they do but rush over to you and jump into your arms with such feral cuteness aggression.

“i love you.” she screeches and kicks her feet as the two of you fall down onto the ground with a loud thud.

at the very least the soft ground full of moss and grass took most of the damage of the fall, other than takara landing on top of you. which takes any air you had had in your lungs right out of them.

[mistydeyes]

OMG THERES 1K OF YOU!! I cannot believe it! Thank you all so much for all the love and support these last few months :) Literally tearing up at how many people love my works. It all started with a silly little pharmacist fic and look at where we are now!

To celebrate, I will be opening up my inbox for some prompts! For the next week, feel free to send me a character, a prompt below, and any other details (ex. female, male, or g/n character) :)

aesthetic prompts 💌 - CLOSED NOW! thank you for all the submissions :)

soft and cute - all fluff!

vase of flowers - they return home to your door with a small bouquet of flowers with rudy

loveseat - shopping for furniture for your shared home

linen tablecloths - hosting a dinner party (one that is pinterest worthy)

orange juice - sick days call for the best care

vintage maps - a spontaneous trip with an event filled itinerary

cherry lip balm - what was your first kiss like? with graves

paper rings - “put this on” “why did you make a ring out of the straw wrapper?”

ramekins of soup - you both are not experienced chefs but you try a new recipe in the kitchen

tuberose- looking at old photo albums and reminiscing on old memories

tote bags - “hey can you hold this for me?” “why do you have so many things?” “it’s not my fault these pockets don’t hold anything”

sugar cubes - they surprise you with your favorite dessert/sweet treat with price

music - “i made you a playlist!”

pearls - a fancy dinner out with expensive clothes and dining

folded sheets - "hi, i'm your neighbor across the hall :)"

gold - a small gifted ring as a token of your love with price

unlit cigarette - meeting in the most unexpected of places

hot chocolate - a warm snowed in cabin with nowhere to go

house plant - “for your new apartment!” “you know i’m not here enough to water that”

pastel bonnets and rattles - “we are NOT naming our child that”

perfume - perfume bottles decorate your bureau and you decide to let them choose your scent for the day with gaz

friendship bracelets - friends don't look at friends that way, is there something between us? with ghost

shower of tears - angst

crystal glasses - a fight ends with shattered wine glasses and someone is left to pick up the pieces with gaz

running mascara - "i can't believe you would say that to me" with the 141

hyacinth - they decide to interrupt the wedding just as you're about to say your vows with ghost

cardigans - "please don't go, please don't leave me" with ghost

sea salt - you can't do this anymore and just need to get away from them

stars - "do you think in another universe things would have worked out for us?"

cubic zirconia - you both come to the realization that your relationship is beyond repair

cold sheets - "can you hold me just one more time?" with soap and gaz

hydrangeas - a sudden death leaves one of you without the other for the rest of time

cocktails - "you need to stop drinking too much" "what do you know?"

graveyard - "please i don't want to die" with price

enlisted - military au

empty cartridges - "I want you to run, I'll cover you!"

uniforms - they sure clean up well as you look at them in their dress uniform with price

cigarette smoke - you share a cigarette (and exchange indirect kisses) while on patrol with ghost

confidential files - you're the newest addition to the team and you recognize a familiar face

jacket - you forgot to pack you winter gear and they're helping you avoid the cold

angel - this time you're their knight in shining armor as you save them with soap | with price

manila folders - "I'm being transferred to another unit"

bandages - you are the only one with the med kit and are tasked with patching them up

barbells - "you're doing it wrong, let me show you"

MREs - "can we switch? this food is absolute shit"

hit the showers (18+) - a prank ends with you getting your clothes and towel stolen with soap

wigs - you get sent undercover with them

hot and seductive - smut (18+)

lace (18+) - “wait for me in the bedroom, i have a surprise”with soap

stained lipstick (18+) - rough kisses in the back of an uber with gaz | with ghost

stolen glaces (18+) - "are you going to kiss me or not?"

tanning lotion (18+) - you just wanted help with an even lotion application but now their touch is venturing elsewhere

black and white photos (18+) - you take a few photos so they can remember you (and your body) while on deployment with price: part i and part ii

fruit juice (18+) - "let's test out that theory about drinking pineapple juice"

morning sun (18+) - you have nowhere to go and decide to spend it in bed ;) with ghost | with gaz | with price

silk (18+) - “you look absolutely gorgeous tonight”

[iamvegorott]

Magicians Don't Need Superheros Pt22

First: Link Prev: Link Next:TBA: Link

----------

Yet another week passed, a peaceful week, well, as peaceful as the Septiceye House could be with Anti always trying to find something fun to do. But nothing too chaotic happened in that week and Marvin had agreed to go out on another one of Jackie’s patrols, wanting an excuse to go to the little bakery and get a sweet treat. It wasn’t hard to convince Jackie to make a stop during his routine for something chocolatey. 

“I meant to ask you a while ago, but what other jobs do you do aside from security?” Marvin said after he and Jackie claimed a little booth in the bakery. He had a chocolate muffin in front of him while Jackie had a muffin as well but he also had two cookies and a slice of apple pie that he couldn’t resist getting since it just came out of the oven. 

“The security stuff is like my usual go-to ‘cause of my strength.” Jackie took a large bite of the pie, smiling at the flavor for a moment as he chewed. “Does being a bodyguard count as something different?” 

“I’d say so. Watching over a location and watching over a person seem very different.” Marvin picked up a fork and used it on his muffin. 

“Dude, no.” Jackie stared in disbelief. 

“What?”

“You’re using a fork for your muffin?”

“It’s cleaner to eat it this way.” 

“It’s a muffin.”

“You’re using a fork.”

“For a pie.”

“Same thing. Dessert forks.”

“I’m going to explode.”

“You’re not going to explode.”

“I’m dying.”

“You’re dramatic.” Marvin loaded his fork again and held it toward Jackie. “You’re not going to die if you eat some muffin from a fork.” 

“I can feel my atoms splitting as we speak.” Jackie exaggerated a shiver, noise, and all. 

“Eat the muffin bite.” Marvin leaned over the table and had the fork closer to Jackie. 

“My particles are parting.” 

“Your particles are fine.” 

“Death is coming for me.”

“I’m about to crawl over this table and shove this fork into your mouth if you don’t do it yourself.” 

“I want everyone to wear superhero outfits at my funeral.”

“I’ll make sure of it.” Marvin rolled his eyes as Jackie ate the muffin from his fork. “Look at that. No atoms splitting or particles parting, you’re in one piece.” 

“I feel like I committed a war crime.” 

“You are such a-” 

“Dork?” Jackie finished with a chuckle when Marvin’s phone ringing cut off his comment.

“A massive one,” Marvin added, taking his phone out and seeing that it was Chase calling. “Hello?”

“Hey, Marvin. Let Jackie know he needs to charge his phone and I need you two back at the House.” Chase said through the phone. 

“Wait, why?” 

“You’re going to be meeting the Ipliers.”

x~x~x

Marvin thought the Septiceye House was large but the Iplier Manor was massive. He felt like a Barbie-sized doll going into a house and not a grown man. 

“People live here?” Marvin asked Jackie in a whisper, the two of them sticking to the back of the group as Chase knocked on the door. 

“Yeah. just wait, it gets fancier.” Jackie whispered back. 

“I’m so surprised.” Marvin’s voice was laced with sarcasm. 

“Welcome, come in, we’re just waiting for the others and we can begin.” Dark greeted them after opening the door, stepping aside and gesturing with his hand for them to enter. 

“I think my particles are parting,” Marvin muttered. 

“And you call me dramatic.” Jackie teased and quickly scrambled into the Manor when Marvin gave him a look. 

“Good afternoon,” Dark stated flatly to Marvin as he came into the building last. “Do you plan on behaving like a brat again?” 

“Do you plan on removing the metal rod from your ass?” Marvin matched Dark’s tone. 

“Bad idea, bad idea,” Jackie said to himself as he scrambled back over. “Should not have left you alone with him.” He slipped between the two and turned Marvin around by his shoulders and walked away with him. 

“I think me and Dark get along swimmingly.” Marvin’s sarcasm was back in full force. “Soon we’ll be braiding each other’s hair and talking about cute boys.” 

“I sure hope I make it into that talk.” A new voice said with a deep chuckle. 

“Cowboy?” Marvin said when he saw the newest Iplier, blinking as his form took on his unique one.

“Adventurer.” The Iplier corrected, tilting his hat before bowing a bit, taking hold of one of Marvin’s hands, and kissing the knuckles. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.” He said with a wink. 

“A flirty cowboy.” Marvin hummed. The man straightened up with another chuckle. 

“Wilford wasn’t joking when he said you have a fun mouth on you. I can see why Jackie enjoys your company.” The man’s grin turned toward Jackie, gesturing to his hands that were still on Marvin’s shoulders. 

“Well, I just-we’re-we’re just-he’s a good-he’s a good friend.” Jackie sputtered as he dropped his hands and then used them to point to the person whose name he spoke; “Marvin, Illinois. Illinois, Marvin.” He tried to change the subject with his next sentence. “Illinois was the one that taught me the waltz.” 

“Now, that’s not shocking,” Marvin picked up on how Illinois seemed to like to tease. It wasn’t too far of a stretch for someone very flirty to be like that as well.  

“Did he dip you?” Illinois asked.

“He did,” Marvin said with a light nod.

“I was showing off,” Jackie weakly laughed. 

“A dip is a good way of doing that.” Illinois chuckled, eyes shifting to the side before returning and he grinned. “And I am going to steal Jackie here for a moment.” He wrapped an arm across Jackie’s shoulder and walked off with him. 

“A good friend?” Illinois asked in a soft tone, making sure no one else could hear them over their own conversations. 

“Yeah. Like, we clicked really fast and he’s a good friend.” Jackie matched Illinois’ level. 

“Usually good friends don’t look like they want to yank off my head for doing my usual introduction.” Illinois hummed.

“I’m protective, you know that. When we went on that security job together some creep was like, being all creepy with him and I…I might have almost broken his shoulder.” Jackie admitted the last part quickly, it sounding like one word. 

“Jackie,” Illinois said the name in shock. “You’re not one to normally do something like that.” 

“He was making Marvin uncomfortable.” Jackie rubbed the back of his neck. 

“Are we still going with the ‘just a good friend’ route? Because that sounds like you’re getting jealous.” Illinois poked Jackie’s chest. 

“No. No, it’s not.” Jackie pushed Illinois’ hand away. “If the creep was creeping on anyone, I would have done the same for them.” 

“Would have stepped in, of course, you are a hero after all, but you wouldn’t almost shatter a shoulder,” Illinois said. “Did you tell Chase about that?”

“No. He would have grounded me big time if I did.”

“Maybe you should talk to him. I know we’re pals but he knows you a lot more than me, might be able to pick at your brain and see if you were just being a hero, or if there’s more going on in that heart of yours.” 

“Nothing is-” Jackie stopped himself and sighed. “You’re not going to leave me alone until I talk to Chase.”

“You know it.” Illinois winked.

“Fine.” Jackie slumped his body in a bit of a pout. “But I’m not going to like it.”

“You might.” Illinois patted Jackie’s back and then let him go, walking off while Jackie turned to see where Marvin was. He chuckled when he saw Marvin standing with the Jims, the other set of twins, and wasn’t shocked at how Marvin looked very confused as the Jims rambled to each other.

“Magic.”

“Magic.”

“Not chaos magic.”

“No, no. No chaos. Just magic.”

“No demons.”

“No demons.” 

“Jackie, I can’t tell if I’m having a stroke or I really need a nap,” Marvin said as Jackie joined him. 

“They are the Jims. He’s RJ and he’s CJ.” Jackie first pointed to the Iplier with a microphone in his hands and then to the one with a camera on his shoulder. “Reporter Jim and Camerman Jim.” 

“They’ve been calling me cat Jim,” Marvin said. 

“They do that. I’m hero Jim.” Jackie had a proud grin. 

“I can’t tell if this is adorable or if I should be running for the hills.” 

“Everyone has a Jim name if that helps.” 

“Guess I’ll get my cardio workout in later.” Marvin chuckled. “How many more do I need to meet?”

“Five, well, six if you count Blank.” Jackie counted with his fingers, putting down four of them and then pointing. “That guy talking with Henrik is Dr. Iplier or Edward as we all call him. He’s the Iplier’s doc like how Hen is ours.” 

“So, he’s their dad?” Marvin asked with another chuckle. 

“I think Dark has that title.” 

“The way I would always be running away from home if Dark was my parent. Not even teenage rebellion, I’d be running right after birth.” 

“Would you believe me if I said the newest Iplier did?” Jackie chuckled. 

“Oh? Now you have to give me all the details.” Marvin couldn’t help his curiosity from peeking through. 

“Maybe not while he’s in the room.” Jackie scratched his cheek with a finger. 

“Hey, dude! You must be Marvin!” One of the Ipliers Marvin hadn’t met yet rolled on his heels over to them. Marvin had to admit, with the other Ipliers he’s experienced, he wasn’t expecting someone with bright orange sunglasses and a black tank top. The b that was on the shirt looked familiar and he swore it was glowing.

“You are going to scare him, you nearly did the same with Madrick when he arrived.” Another Iplier joined, this one wearing basic glasses, and his blue t-shirt had a glowing G. Did they have lights in their shirts?

“Maddy’s warmed up to me, man. He just had to get used to the vibe.” The first Iplier did a little wave with his arms. “Plus, like, the dude was ready to literally set everyone but Mare on fire, so I have some laxness in that. Robbo loved me though when we first met.”

“Does he own a skateboard, by chance?” Marvin asked Jackie. 

“He does,” Jackie said.

“I knew it.” 

“Let’s get our introductions finished so we can continue with our day. We are completely off schedule and this new vision is only making it worse.” The second Iplier sighed.

“Vision?” Marvin was asking Jackie again.

“When everyone gets here, it’ll be explained.” Jackie gave a nervous smile. 

“Alright, man, alright.” The first Iplier faced Marvin again. “I’m Bing and this mud-puddle here is Googs.” 

“Google.” The second Iplier corrected.

“Like the search engines?” Marvin was going to ask if those were nicknames, but given how ‘Googs’ seemed to be the nickname, it was likely their actual names. Not too odd considering some of the other names he’s experienced. 

“Exactly! We’re androids, dude.” Bing had the biggest grin.

“Androids?” Marvin definitely wasn’t expecting that. Magic he was used to, androids that moved, breathed, and looked like the average human, was sci-fi and he didn’t dwell much into that genre.

“Yes. We were formed with wires.” Google placed a hand on his arm and opened his skin like a panel, showing said wires and lights and other technical gadgets Marvin would never understand the function of.

“Googs!” Bing quickly closed the opening. “Come on, man, you know we can’t just show off our insides. You’re gonna, like, traumatize the newbie.” 

“Madrick was interested in it,” Google stated.

“Maddy’s a big nerd, he likes that stuff. Not everyone is the same, dude.” 

“Oh. My apologies.” 

“I have no idea how to feel about this situation anymore.” Marvin blinked a few times. Did seeing an android’s wires under their…skin count as gore? Should he be traumatized?

“Hey, look, it’s Yancy.” Jackie waved a hand over to an Iplier that came out and went over to Illinois. The Iplier, Yancy, shot a smile and wave back to Jackie before his hand was taken by Illinois and they walked off together.

“Is he in a prison outfit?” Marvin asked. “Or does he just really like black and white stripes?” 

“Prison. I don’t know the full story, the only person that does is Illinois.” Jackie shrugged. “He likes musicals.”

“I’m getting whiplash.” 

“Sorry, we’re late.” Mare’s voice spoke as he, Phantom, Mad, and, who Marvin assumed was Blank, appeared in the middle of the room.

“I’m really getting whiplash.” Marvin rubbed his temples with his hand. 

“Blank’s change came in late and we wanted to wait until he finished before using magic on him,” Mare explained. 

“Robbie!” Blank, a young child, squeaked as he ran over to Robbie, also a young child. “I’m six!”

“Me too!” Robbie was also squeaking, the two children were very happy about being the same age. 

“RJ, CJ, take Blank and Robbie to the playroom and I will come to get you all when we are finished.”

“Yes, dad Jim!” RJ and CJ both saluted before taking off with the children. 

“Dad Jim?” Marvin repeated with a snort. 

“Hush.” Dark snapped as he walked past. Marvin was about to snark but stopped when he noticed the weird shift in the air, everyone moving and following Dark.

“It’s time to do the thing,” Jackie said. “The vision thing.” 

“Then we can go back to the House?” Marvin walked alongside Jackie.

“Yeah. Wanna play Stardew Valley tonight?” Jackie offered. 

“That sounds nice.” Marvin smiled, watching everyone go through a set of double doors. He stepped in before Jackie and paused when he saw the last Iplier. 

He sat at the end of a table, arms resting on the surface and hands on top of each other. He sat up straight and faced forward. None of that was strange but the bloody cloth wrapped around his eyes is what caused Marvin to hesitate. 

“That’s Host,” Jackie said. “He’s our vision guy.” 

[muddyorbsblr]

hypotheticals & distractions

See the full 14 Days Collection here! See my full list of works here!

Summary: You and Magnus are tasked with the unfortunate duty of manning the phones through a Friday night and he decides you should play some games to pass the time.

Pairing: Magnus Martinsson x Reader

Word Count: 2.4k

Warnings: 18+ | smut (minors & pearl clutchers, don't even think about it); oral (f receiving); fingering; horn dog Magnus; language (kinda?)

Things to be aware of: coworkers to lovers

"I suppose things could be worse…"

You looked up from the post-it you were doodling on to glare at Magnus, his tall frame and blonde curls currently a blur as he spun around aimlessly in his chair.

The two of you had drawn the short sticks and were stuck manning the phone for any 911 calls this otherwise fine Friday night. Meanwhile the rest of the team were currently either out enjoying drinks with their friends or going out on date night with their partners. Or sleeping at home.

"Oh yeah? How so, Martinsson?"

He stopped spinning in his chair to face you, his baby blue eyes shining with a hint of playfulness that had you feeling a faint ache in your heart for him. You'd done the cliche rookie move and developed a bit of a crush on the unjustifiably handsome detective, and while it made going to work a touch more fun when you were among your team, being alone with him in the station felt like absolute torture.

"I like looking at the brighter side of things, Y/N." Your pulse stuttered at the sound of your name coming from his lips. "I may be stuck here on a Friday night, but at least I'm stuck here on a Friday night with the prettiest woman in Ystad."

You threw a stress ball his way, aiming at his head. "You bloody goof." It was such an overused line and you knew it was, but it didn't stop the fluttering in your stomach at the notion of him calling you pretty. And he made it even worse by wheeling his chair over to you and crowding your space.

When he made it over to you, he flopped his head on your shoulder, letting out an exaggerated sigh. "You're on death row--"

"Excuse me?"

"We're playing Hypotheticals. Indulge me, please, darling?" You huffed and waved your hand in the air, giving him a signal to continue. "You're on death row and the prison guards are taking your order for your final meal. What are you getting?"

You thought it over for a few moments before answering, "A double cheeseburger with extra pickles, a chocolate milkshake, chili cheese fries--"

"What a discerning palate you have," he chuckled.

"Shut up it's my last meal, I don't give two fucks about hoity toity bullshittery. And then for dessert…an Oreo ice cream cake, a brewed coffee, and tiramisu gelato from Italy."

"Sounds like you're trying to die by sugar."

"Better than dying by execution. And besides, it's not like the calories would have a chance to even count considering I'm going to die in a matter of hours." He broke out chuckling at your answer, looking as if he was grading your answer somehow. "Alright then, since we're playing Hypotheticals, what're you going to want to eat before you get thrown out the land of the living?"

A devilish smile stretched across his face before he answered, "Pussy."

"Blech," you let out an amused sound of feigned disgust. "Magnus."

"Yours."

"MAGNUS!" You reached over to grab your stress ball from his hand and bopped it against his forehead repeatedly. The actions made him lift his head from your shoulder blocking his face from the stress ball.

"Alright, alright, I surrender!" the detective only a few months your senior said with his hands up, letting out a low giggle. "Next question--"

"Are you honestly not going to answer the first one?" You eyed him with incredulity lacing your every word.

"I already did," he shot back with a wiggle of his eyebrows.

You threw the stress ball his way again. "Horn dog." You rolled your eyes at him catching the ball effortlessly and sending a cheeky little wink your way. "Fine. Next question."

He stood up and walked toward the security camera at the corner of the station, curiosity flooding you as he stood on a chair to reach over and unplug the cord from the back of the recording device. "You're stranded on a deserted island with only three things to keep you company until rescue comes and finds you. What're those three things?"

You briefly contemplated taking a page out of his book and giving a raunchy horn dog answer, but ultimately decided against it. "A Kindle to keep me from going mad. A water filtration system so I could actually drink the abundant water supply around me. And…a knife. To cut open coconuts, kill wildlife. I can't live on water alone."

"The Kindle would run out of battery," he called out from the area of the coffee vending machine, getting what would probably be his sixth cup since the team had left.

"Well then hypothetically speaking, this Kindle has unlimited battery." Your heart caught in your throat as he came back into view, an amused smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth as he walked back toward your desk, placing one of the two cups he was holding in front of you. "I'm almost afraid to ask but what're your three items?"

He sat at the edge of your desk, sipping his coffee, before answering. "Condoms--"

"You're alone on a desert island what the fuck would you need those for?" you asked, breaking out into a fit of laughter at the absurdity of it all.

"I'm getting there. Next would be…a communication device that we could use to contact any ships or planes that would pass our way."

"We--?"

He placed a finger over your mouth. "And lastly…a beautiful, brilliant woman equipped with a knife, a water filtration system, and a Kindle with unlimited battery." He moved his hand to cup the side of your face, his thumb stroking across your cheekbone.

"Magnus…" you cautioned, your heart stuttering and your brain struggling to find words. "Hypothetically speaking, is there something you'd like to tell me?"

The only sound to come out of you was a squeak as you watched him lick his lips before leaning across your desk and placing a tender kiss on your lips. You did your best to bite back the whimper that threatened to leave you when he pulled away all too soon. "What if I told you, hypothetically speaking of course, that I've been thinking about doing that since you walked in to the station six months ago?"

"Then hypothetically I would tell you that for the last six months I've been hoping that you weren't mucking about whenever you seemed to be flirting."

"I was flirting." Something in you soared at his admission, as if a weight had been lifted off you that your crush was not unreturned.

"Hypothetically?"

He shook his head at you, a smirk tugging at his lips. "We're done playing that game, sweet girl."

Just as he was about to lean in to kiss you again, the phone rang, breaking you both out of the moment. He instead leaned his forehead against you, groaning as he took one of the coins from the little container on your desk and tossed it in the air.

"Heads I take it," he called out as the coin landed in his palm and showed it to you. Tails.

With a sigh, you picked up the receiver. "Ystad police station."

"My husband tripped going down the stairs and we need an ambulance," a frantic elderly woman said from the other end. "I think his leg is broken."

Before you could respond, you felt his hand on your shoulder, moving aside the strap of your tank top and tilting your head to the side, his free hand working loose the bun in your hair to thread his fingers through the strands. "I'll patch you through to the Emergency Room so they can send an ambulance your way. Could you give me your address, please?"

You struggled to scribble down the address as the woman dictated it to you, finding it near impossible to focus the moment Magnus began to press his lips along the column of your neck. "How soon will the ambulance get here?"

"Consider them dispatched as soon as we end this call, ma'am," you responded, hearing the line go dead. You quickly dialed the emergency room and instructed them to dispatch an ambulance to the woman's location, struggling to get the words out as Magnus found a sensitive spot between your neck and shoulder and focused his attentions there, pressing open mouthed kisses and lightly sucking on the spot. "What're you doing?" you gasped out after you placed the receiver back in its cradle.

"New game," he murmured against your skin. "Whenever that phone rings, we flip a coin. Whoever has to answer has to maintain their composure. While the other one distracts them."

Fucking hell, there's no way I'd win this, you hissed at yourself. "Is that why you unplugged the security cameras?"

He tucked his fingers under your chin, turning your head so that he could capture your lips in a deceptively lazy kiss, as if you'd been doing this for years rather than mere minutes. "Ja,Käraste."

"And how does one win this game, exactly?" You tried to not let it show that his words had such a jarring effect on you. Most Beloved. That was what he'd just called you.

"If we play it right, we both win." Before you could respond, the phone rang once again, making a visibly irritated look color his face before he tossed the coin in the air. "Heads you take it." You glared at him once he showed you the coin as he caught it in his palm. Heads.

"Next time I flip the ruddy coin," you grumbled as you picked up the receiver once again. "Ystad police station."

"I'm seeing smoke coming out of my neighbor's apartment and I think they're asleep!"

You had to suppress the gasp that wanted to escape you as you felt Magnus nudging your knees apart and hiking your skirt up your legs and tracing his lips in a trail up your inner thigh. 'What are you doing??' you mouthed to him frantically, only to receive a cheeky wink in response as he kept on kissing his way up the inside of your thigh.

"I can call the fire department and have a truck dispatched to your location to have it checked out." You bit your fist to keep from moaning as you felt Magnus move your panties to the side and run his tongue along the length of your slit before closing his lips on your clit. You took a sharp inhale through your nose before managing to choke out, "May I have your current location?"

How you managed to write down the address legibly while there was currently a curly-haired blond detective on his knees in front of you, your thigh propped on his shoulder while he continued to alternate between licking into your entrance and sucking at your clit, you'd never know. But he seemed determined to get you to crack once you'd phoned the fire department and gave out the address, increasing his pace and moaning against your skin as your labored breathing threatened to give you away.

"You're a menace," you whimpered as you placed the receiver back in the cradle, throwing your head back to let out an obscene moan of his name that echoed all around the empty station.

"Do you want me to stop?" You snapped your head forward to look at him, a mischievous glint in his eyes as he held your gaze while he placed another slow, open-mouthed kiss to the throbbing bud above your entrance.

"Don't you dare," you rasped, earning a smirk from him as he placed his mouth on you again, increasing his pace as you felt two sinfully long fingers enter you curling up and stroking against a spot inside of you that no previous lover had ever found. You were half-convinced you were born unfortunate to not even have that in you.

His free arm draped over your lower stomach, pinning you to your seat has he inched you closer and closer to your release. "Come, min kärlek," he groaned against you. "Now."

You weren't sure if it was his command or the way that his growling of the word against your skin sent the most delicious tremors throughout your body that pushed you over the edge, your hips bucking against his hold on you. You could feel him smirking against you as he withdrew his fingers from you and lapped at your release with abandon, holding your hips still and making you ride out your orgasm on his tongue.

The next few moments were spent hoping that that phone wouldn't ring as you tried to catch your breath, your mind foggy and your throat scratched from screaming Magnus' name without a care if it would have awoken the entirety of Ystad in the process. From the back of your mind you were vaguely aware of him pressing kisses down your leg as he covered your legs with the bunched up fabric of your skirt before standing and hovering over you to press his lips to your cheek in a tender kiss.

"When they return and relieve us of this shift, I'm bringing you home and finishing what we started here tonight," he murmured into your ear before pressing a kiss to the corner of your jaw. He began to work his lips toward your neck when the phone rang again, causing him to let out a frustrated sound before he wrapped his arm around you before standing to his feet and pulling you up with him.

You tossed the coin from your desk into the air. "Tails I take it," you called out as the coin landed in your hand, a delighted smile stretching across your face as you saw the side on which it landed. Heads.

He let out a chuckle and pressed a kiss to your temple before picking up the receiver. "Ystad police station."

A lascivious grin stretched across your face as you placed your hands on his chest and pushed him to sit down on the chair, making quick work to position yourself on his lap, straddling his hips. You stifled a giggle when you could hear his voice wavering as he spoke to the person on the other end, pressing a kiss to the corner of his jaw before tracing the shell of his ear with your tongue and whispering, "My turn."

A/N: Welcome to the first Magnus story in this collection 😏😏 I had a hell of a lot of fun writing this one, and I hope y'all enjoy reading it as well. As always, thank you all so much for all the love you've given to this collection so far, especially to the authors who have put out stories and joined in on this project of mine 🥹

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