#THE only yuri anime that matters

[cat-soap-opera]

no listen to me... a yuri themed anthro warrior cats wlw map using the yagakimi opening (link).... listen, LISTEN TO ME........

[skrunksthatwunk]

im exploding into a million pieces i found a reddit thread about butches in video games (specifically looking for them) in hopes that there was some kind of lesser known dream daddy-esque butch dating sim or SOMETHING cute like that and guys the fucking crumbs we have to live on you're actually killing me. im withering away why are there no kissable butches in video games im going to throw up and kill everyone. nobody wants a butch dating sim apparently. im gonna go weep in the fetal position

[ladyloveandjustice]

I'm really glad the anime kept this in. I was worried they might not. This is the turning point for I'm in Love with the Villainess, where it becomes clear it's not just a silly isekai comedy, but a story that also earnestly discusses queer issues.

It's still fairly unusual for the kind of yuri that gets adapted to anime to outright have characters say "I'm gay", so the fact Rae frankly discusses her sexuality here is refreshing-- but on top of that, the show goes on to directly challenge homophobia.

Rae's behavior with Claire before this has been inappropriate (and they really should have toned it down in adaptations to make this convo work better, but alas) and that is acknowledged here. However, Claire moving away from Rae specifically because Rae states that she's gay is what's pointed out wrong, and the stereotype of "lesbians just can't control themselves and will creep on every woman they meet" is pointed out as wrong. This is a common stereotype that persists pretty much everywhere--the idea that it isn't "safe" for women to be around lesbians--and it is valuable that it's called out here. Gay people aren't more likely to be predatory that straight people, and that's something everyone should get through their heads.

What's more, the idea of "oh she's not gay or bi she just happened to fall in love with a woman" or "it's just a love that transcends gender" isn't a super common stereotype in the US and a lot of other countries, but it is one that pops up constantly in anime and manga, because it's seen as somehow "more okay" for a character to kiss girls if she goes out of her way to say it doesn't make her a lesbian or bi/pan. (In the novel Rae does internally mention that bisexual people exist, btw, but she's just not one of them).

So Rae bluntly saying "no gender does matter to me. I'm a lesbian. I'm only attracted to women" is refreshing. "Oh she just fell in love with that one special girl, no reflection on her sexuality whatsoever" being called out as it's own form of prejudice is a pretty big deal.

[chirpy-poppy]

Our Pin

When Darkwick allows you to choose one of the houses to join, how will they convince you?

Inspired by this ask/post.

Frostheim “Wait,” Jin grunts at you as you approach the door, done with his errands for the day. He tosses something at you which you barely manage to catch. When you do, you recognize the deep blue pin. “You’d be set for life with the connections you make here. Choose wisely.” Jin is a man of few words, but you’d hear most of Frostheim’s pitch from Kaito who basically begs you to join them. Lucas would come with a few logical points about why you should choose Frostheim, and Tohma would keep you so busy with tasks, you wouldn’t be able to visit other houses during your decision period.

Vagastrom “It’ll be pretty cool if we lived a little closer together, Senpai. I’ll cook for you every day.” Sho is the only one who’d want you at Vagastrom. Alan gives you a stern warning not to do something so dangerous. Leo’s existence alone convinces you to stay far away.

JabberwockThey use their fluffy animals to their full advantage. Haru takes you on a Cappybus tour to see all the cutest animals while Towa engulfs you in the most fragrant flowers. Ren might actually beg you to join them too since you are actually willing to do the chores. Towa gives you such a puppy look while Haru discreetly pins the orange brooch onto your lapel. Peekaboo lets out the saddest “Booo” when you leave for the day. How can you ever refuse them? 

SinostraRomeo had given Taiga a lecture on their objective just before you were scheduled to meet them, so the captain actually remembers who you are when you walk in. “Hello, Kitten,” he purrs as you come in with some documents. He somehow gets you strapped into his torture chair and is about to stab the brooch into your jacket when Romeo bursts in. “You’re supposed to convince her, not force her!” “Why? It’s so much easier this way.” Taiga spins his revolver before placing it on your temple. Ritsu steps in at this moment to quote some law that no one is really paying attention to. Taiga and Romeo get into such an argument that no one notices you slipping away and running for your life.

Hotarubi The three invite you over for tea. At the end of it, Subaru presents you with the amethyst brooch in an intricately carved wooden box. “We would love it if you would join Hotarubi, PC. Of course, we want you to make the decision you believe is best for you, but you should know you are always welcomed and appreciated here.” As Haku walks you home, he purposefully takes a scenic route through Hotarubi. He’d gently pitch his own house but reminds you they are here for you no matter what decision you make. 

ObscuaryWas unfortunately not one of the options available to you. Rui is quite relieved though. He isn’t sure how he can live constantly worried about touching something as weak as a human. He also knows he could never live with himself if something happened to you, and the risk of it increases so much more if you stayed in his dorm. Lyca is completely bummed though. He thought he had a chance to finally have a friend at the dorm. He does not understand why you can’t stay at Obscuary since he’s here and he’s human too. Ed thinks it’s a shame, but he is sure you’d visit often still.

Mortkranken“Humph! You should feel honored to even be considered joining Mortkranken,” Yuri gloats, dangling the brooch in front of you. “He desperately wants you to join,” Jiro deadpans. “Jiro! Can you shut it! I mean, I wouldn’t mind if you did since you are a very interesting subject.” Yuri’s blush isn’t fooling anyone as he shoves the teal accessory into your hands. Despite his shyness, he still keeps you around for another three hours helping him pipette. As you get ready to leave, he calls your name. “Consider it. You… You aren’t repulsive, at least.”

A/N: Thank you to those who sent in prompts. I'm sorry if I don't get to yours, but I will only be writing those that spark an idea. I don't want to write something bleh just to fulfill an ask. Thank you for your submission though!

[fillinforlater]

Friends that can keep a secret

Male Reader x Jo Yuri (ft. two male friends)

Length: 3.500 words

Tags: foursome, gangbang, MMMF, drunk sex, seducing, a faux game of spin the bottle, making out, sharing a girlfriend, rimming, face fucking, double penetration, anal, spanking, rough sex, anal creampie, riding, cowgirl, protection, not_your_girlfriend!Yuri

TW: there are other male OCs in this and you fuck a girl in all her holes, I dunno, if you don't like that, feel free to leave

Inspiration: @breach12 for the request/prompt

(A/N: here is something I promised to write quite a while back. It's finally finished. I changed the prompt quite a bit, but I hope the person who requested it likes it (and y'all too))

“Should you knock or I knock.”

Daehwi grins and you roll your eyes. He can never make things easy.

“Dude, just fucking knock.”

You and your friends recently finished another semester in college. You really had to think, was it the fifth, the sixth, the—no, it was the sixth. It felt like forever since you enrolled in that university with it’s unimpressive name and even less impressive campus. In the end, you made it through this time without impressive grades or interesting stories, but maybe this is your ideal life.

Calm and uninteresting, at least to others.

Your friends are a bit different. On one hand there is Daehwi, the crazy one. He is like a wild animal, free from every and all constraints but a slave of his desires and instincts. He gets a lot of girls, hookups, relationships, break ups, scandals—nothing ever slows him down. No matter how stupidly crazy his ideas are, they always work out and in the end, even his grades pan out. Daehwi has either figured out how to live a perfect life or he is just insanely lucky.

But he is a good friend in time of need.

On the other hand is Junseo. He is one hell of a cutie-patootie, caring for every one of his friends, colleagues, even profs. No bad word ever comes from his lips and he is always punctual. Literally always. He trades loyalty for loyalty and is the perfect example for genuinity and consistency. It is only fair that he got the most beautiful girl as his girlfriend.

Junseo is a great friend, but sometimes Yuri takes up all his time.

Yuri is the rock star on campus. She can make the entire university fall on their knees by grabbing a mic and singing her heart out. She is talented, smart, gorgeous—the crush of many, until they find another girl to smash. Yuri was never ready for one night stands, and so it was only fitting that Junseo and her fell in love gradually. No hookups, just pure, romantic love.

Love without you. You watched from afar as your best friend fell in love with your crush. That crush on Yuri that everyone has at least once in their campus life, it still lingers in your heart. You have to suppress it almost daily, but it is a tiny stain on your otherwise good life. Suppress it for Junseo, especially today when you get to celebrate another successful semester at his place. 

"Oh hey guys, come in!" Junseo opens the door with a wide grin and a surprising pink hue on his cheeks.

"Yo!” Daehwi shouts until his chest vibrates. “We bought beer, let's celebrate—damn, did you start drinking without us?" Daehwi puts down the two six packs and starts to aggressively pinch Junseo’s cheek. You start to laugh as the two playfully fight like two lion cubs.

“I brought some snacks,” you shout and try to get their attention. Fun is good and all, but you’re still standing outside and the cold air is brushing past your sensitive calves. "I got them for you, but if you don’t move, I’ll eat them all alone."

The three of you finally make your way into the flat and onto the couches. You feel the good vibes radiating throughout the room and it only gets progressively better. The first step to make such a celebration unforgettable is good beer and surprisingly, the cans Daehwi bought (at least you hope that he bought them) are filled with it. You down two of them easily, Daehwi is already on his third while Junseo reaches for a Soju bottle to create an intoxicating mixture. 

“Damn, I didn’t know you got Soju,” Daehwi groans in ecstasy as he takes a swing straight from the green bottle. “Your grades must have been terrible.”

“Nah, it’s not that,” Junseo responds with a pout. “It's because this might be the last time we have a celebration like this.”

“Huh, how so?” you protest and get a handful of crackers into your mouth, not willing to accept that such a well-kept tradition would end tonight, without warning.

“It’s because, next semester, I’m done, so the party is gonna be bigger. And afterwards, with work and all, I don’t know if it will work out like this again.”

“Shit, life is really catching up to us.” Daehwi clicks his tongue and you can already see that his drunk, a bit more melancholic but still wild and direct self appears. After all, he can’t keep himself from downing liquor. 

“If only I knew,” you sigh, angry that you forgot that Junseo was already here when you started to study. He was always ahead and now he will be the first to leave behind college life and become a truly normal person. “I would have brought stuff to make this more memorable.”

Junseo grabs the hem of your shirt and there is this drunk grin on his face as he babbles: “Don’t worry, I have things planned.

“Yuri, dear, you can come in now~”

Honest to God, you forgot about her for a split second—you will never for the rest of your life. Yuri walks in, the walk of a supermodel. Her high heels clack on the wooden floor, her hips sway in that stupidly short miniskirt, her eyes sparkle when she winks at you. You’re staring everywhere at once, to the point your throat goes dry again and you quickly need another drink. Luckily, Yuri brought more Soju and hands you a bottle.

“Congrats on beating another semester,” she says with a saccharine smile that stuns you, glues you to the couch, all to the amusement of Junseo beside you. “You gonna take it or not?”

“Su-sure, thank you.” Grab the bottle like an idiot and drink from it like one. Daehwi isn’t any better, dry lips stuck to his can while his eyes are glued to Yuri’s back. She makes sure to stick out her ass for him to see the nice curve. The green plaid skirt is barely long enough to hide her cheeks as she kneels next to him, hands on the table, searching for crackers or chips.

“Yuri, you are gorgeous,” Junseo compliments his girlfriend with a wicked grin and Yuri responds with an expression so sly and sexy, you almost drop your bottle and spit out its contents. Those two must have been drinking before Daehwi and you arrived, otherwise they wouldn’t be so bold.

“Damn, what the hell is going on with you two?” Daehwi bluntly asks them, but all he gets are glances from the couple and a confused shrug by you. “I bet you two are drunk already. Better stop now before any accidents happen.”

“There are no accidents tonight,” Junseo says firmly and makes room in the middle of the table for an empty Soju bottle. “No accidents, no boundaries, no questions asked. Do you two understand?”

“Well, that is a question,” you try to respond with wit, but it’s quickly forgotten when Yuri spins the empty bottle.

“Whoever this bottle lands on gets to have a free wish—kinda like truth and dare, except everyone else has to accept the dare and what you want to do to them.” Yuri’s words have your mind rotating faster than the bottle; is she for real? No limits, no boundaries? No one will ask questions? Can you just—go for it? Ask her to love you for this one night—no Junseo, just you?

Your wish fades to black when the bottle stops and points straight at Junseo, who does not hesitate and grabs his girlfriend at the wrist. Blink once, blink twice and she already sits on his lap, right next to you, and he is ready to stick his tongue into her eager mouth.

“My wish is that everyone fucking loosens up and just watches.”

The most tense thriller could not be more engaging for you. To see Junseo fondle Yuri, her tight little body, her covered boobs, her flawless back, down to the edge of her skirt has you sweaty all over. All over, again, he doesn’t stop and goes for that long, blonde hair and combs it back. Yuri moans and her nails dig into the back of the couch. Then they go back to making out, provocatively loud and Yuri’s top almost slips over her boobs.

You’re not the only one starring. Daehwi gets into position behind them, and he shamelessly looks under Yuri’s skirt—what he finds must be utterly mind melting, because he quickly grabs the bottle and points it at himself. He clears his throat to get everyone’s attention and for a second, the silence is heavier than a black hole.

“I-it’s my turn.” Daehwi gulps, the couple pants. “Can I pull down your skirt, Yuri?”

“Sure, just let me get up.”

With a final kiss on the cheek, Yuri leaves her boyfriend’s lap and stands in front of the kneeling Daehwi. She reaches for his hands and places them on her hips. This was the final straw, the last chain that held back the savage animal. Daehwi roughly yanks down Yuri’s skirt; with every gasp, more of her lower body is revealed until—nothing but a skimpy thong. You get to see it from behind only for a second, because Daehwi immediately spins Yuri around to knead and lick her cute butt cheeks. 

You’ve only heard stories of Daehwi’s sexcapades, the endless rounds of loud smashing, of groaning, of cumming—you never knew he could become so feral at the touch of two small round buttcheeks. It seems to work however, Yuri is definitely feeling herself, hands in her hair, head thrown back as she moans profanities towards the ceiling.

Suddenly, the head of a bottle crosses your vision. Juseon has the green thing pointed at you, on eye level and you don’t let him even start his sentence before uttering your own wish. It’s a bit desperate, but totally accurate to your situation and pent up feelings.

“Yuri, I—I want to make out with you, o-on my lap!”

“Oh yes, for sure~”

Followed by the still manically kneading Daehwi, Yuri climbs on top of you and goes straight for your mouth. Her tongue, still glazed in liquor and tiny chips particles quickly turns into the most delicious treat you have ever had. Yuri engages the kiss, starts off what could have been an equal dance but she quickly succumbs to your sudden dominance. 

Call it a return to your monkey brain, anything but civilized. You fuck her mouth with your tongue, play with her hair lovingly while tormenting her slender frame with rubs and squeezes. Yuri’s giggles urge you on more, you become bolder, reach into the top of her bra—there is no bra, just bare tits to fondle and knead the way only Daehwi would, though he has transitioned to eating Yuri’s ass, thong pushed to the side. 

You’ve lost sight of Juseon, but who the fuck cares when you can stick your hands down to where the sun doesn’t shine and find Yuri’s pussy. She is laughably wet, her juices dripping on your finger while your teeth move to bite her collarbone. She moans and hugs your body, pressing herself further down your length which has been an issue in the tight confines of your jeans for way too long—

“Yuri,” Juseon suddenly shouts. “I think you’re the last one to make a wish.”

You pull out your fingers from those drenched folds and even Daehwi backs off from the feast that is Yuri’s ass. Everyone listens closely when Yuri finally gets her wish out.

“I want you three boys to finally get your cocks out and fuck them into my tight holes until I can’t walk anymore. Don’t think, just fuck me.

“I’m your semester trophy tonight.”

Juseon suddenly stands next to you, feet in the cushions of his couch and his pants meet them quickly. He whips out his cock and as if her lips were magnetically drawn to it, Yuri starts to kiss and lick over it. From tip to base, she does not leave out one spot. Equally sudden is Daehwi, who’s pants you can’t even see anymore, but his cock is clearly pressed against Yuri’s cheeks and then on the ring in between them.

To your surprise—not that you ever actively thought about it—their cocks are just average in size, maybe even below that. Yours might be bigger, but they get girls and relationships all the time—your thoughts shouldn’t become so weird, especially because you have already pulled out your own dick and begun to stroke it to the hardest it has ever been.

Yuri, while her face is getting fucked slowly, her boyfriend’s cock entering and leaving her lips, gently places an unwrapped condom into your sweaty hands. Good thing that they are prepared, because you of course did not bring something like this to what could’ve been a harmless party.

Harmless college parties? Yeah, no, who are you kidding. Just roll the plastic contraceptive over your hard shaft and then try to find Yuri’s pussy. Those hot folds, they are right there—further down. You rub along her midriff, navel, even her crotch but are unable to find it.

Yuri pops Juseon’s cock from her lips and smiles at you while her hand continues to lazily jerk the throbbing, wet thing. She reaches in between your legs and finds your thing poking her belly. 

“Should I help you?” she asks and you avoid her eyes in embarrassment—only for a second thought. Something draws you to their sparkle, lewd and thrilled, while she tries to adjust on your lap until— 

“Ah, fuck, Daehwi, wait!”

“Wha-what is it?” he asks with a somewhat annoyed growl, hands wrapped around Yuri’s waist, cockhead perfectly aligned with her asshole.

“Give me a second. I want all of you to thrust in me simultaneously. I never felt something like that.

“It’ll be great.”

You gulp when Yuri gets you to the entrance of her light pink cavern. This is it, the moment you’ve been waiting for for a long time—not really waiting, just dreaming of. Luckily, you don’t need to dream anymore and just focus on not exploding the moment you—

“Now, fuck, now.”

The signal sends your hips upwards in a thrust. It’s not a full thrust, only half of your cock fills Yuri’s insides. You couldn’t commit to all of it; you need to flex your thighs to keep yourself from cumming too quickly. Daehwi and Junseo do not seem to care about that: both went all in from the get go, filling Yuri’s mouth and ass to the brim with their dicks and their thrusts don’t stop. 

Daehwi’s rough, feral pumping gapes Yuri’s ass and you feel every second of it. He is on the other side, careless, just like in the stories from the countless one-night stands that loved his enthusiasm. This is not enthusiasm, more unbridled sexual desire. He chases his own orgasm every time her ass meets his crotch.

For Junseo it’s similar. He seems to really enjoy Yuri’s drool running down her chin, sometimes even stopping the thrusts just to spread it all over her face with either his tip or a finger. You totally understand why he indulges in the way Yuri looks, all messy and silly, but you’d love to hear her moan louder—you want to see the strongest kind of bliss on her features.

Instead of your own pleasure, you try to find Yuri’s spots and poke your cock against them purposefully. You’re a lot slower than the other two, but your stamina does not decrease at all. Unlike Daehwi, you don’t need any brakes to catch your breath. You just continue to fuck Yuri in this mesmerizing rhythm that has her humming on her boyfriend’s shaft.

“Is this good, do you feel good?” you ask her in between deep breaths, arms around her torso, while she finds stability on your shoulder again.

“Yesh, yes,” she mumbles as Junseo flops out of her mouth. You see him shaking, losing his mind when she starts to twist his tip with two fingers. “You can go faster, harder—don’t think of me. I’m just the reward.”

“Too bad.” Whisper in her ear. “All I can think about is my reward.”

Yuri’s expression shifts, like she is trying to challenge you, like she doesn’t believe that you really care about her, like she—and then she can only think of Daehwi again, who goes on another rampage in her back entrance, while covering her ass with hard spanks.

A tender pain on your lower lip when she bites it. You halt your thrusts, but Daehwi makes it feel like Yuri bounces and rubs on your entire cock. You hear both the guys scream profanities while your own profanities are stuck, unable to come out because of Yuri’s bite.

“Yuri, babe, I’m—” Junseo can barely stand. “I’m so close.”

“In my mouth?” she asks, cutely-lewdly.

“N-no, I want to… finish on your ass.”

“Great idea.” Yuri jerks his cock harder and starts to stick out her ass which seems to trigger another orgasm. Instead of politely asking, Daehwi just growls like a wolf to the moon and Yuri feels his thick cum flood her rectum. “Yes, fuck! Fill that ass, creampie me!”

Now that wasn’t cute at all. Just lewd. Lewd like her fucking face when Daehwi’s cock loudly pops out and Junseo sprays his cum all over those red buttocks. She looks thoroughly satisfied with all the white on her skin, in her hole—maybe she isn’t thinking yet of the mess on her couch, the carpet or on her clothes. 

“Fuck, guys, that was—

“Why haven’t you finished yet?”

Yuri looks at you, as if she expects you to just burst from the look in her eyes. No, she underestimates you. Your stamina is still going strong and your enjoyment of her cunt hasn’t diminished by a single percent.

“I-I can still keep going!”

“Really? Let’s see about that.”

As if you had fucked a million times already, Yuri’s riding and your upwards fucking synchronizes instantaneously. When she crashes down, all of your cock fills her hole and when she rises, you’re right at her entrance, ready to repeat what can only be described as heaven—an entry to happiness. 

But happiness isn’t a dominant emotion right now, hell, you don’t even want it. You just want Yuri and her snug pussy always around you, hot and milking you with that flawless texture. The pink thing should accept you the entire night and with how eagerly she slams herself down on your manhood, she wants it too. 

Maybe Yuri feels happiness, maybe that is your wishful thinking blurring with her mindless expression, mindless moans, mindless tongue that suddenly searches for yours and you engage in a tornado of kisses that leads to Yuri resigning. Her body is all yours now, yours alone, and she is begging to cum. Trophy this, award that, in the end she has her needs and you will fulfill them.

Hold onto her waist and like in the final battle of a video game, use all your knowledge and skill to stimulate the inside of her pussy. Nothing can stop you, not the cum from her gaping hole that drips on your balls, not her weight laying on top of you, not the shocked gaze of Junseo—he must have never seen his girlfriend get fucked so well.

“Fuck, I’m-I’m,

“I feel so good, don’t stop.”

Yuri’s whine feels like a victory. You know she will climax before you do. This is all you’ve ever wanted. After this, you can let your feelings for her die in peace. But for these last few thrusts, she is all yours. Her entire body and mind is occupied by you, and so you claim her with a gentle kiss and a not-so-gentle flick on her clit.

“Who makes you cum?”

“You! You, you make me—ah!”

That scream is so long, so good; she is so tight, so perfect. Yuri trembles, electric shocks of pleasure surge all across her body. Her cunt is so tight and hot, you don’t feel the condom anymore and release your seed into it with lazy pumps. Yuri mewls when she feels the hot sticky mess which sadly misses her hot, messy holes and instead sticks to your dick.

“Okay, fuck,” Junseo sighs and sinks onto the carpet. “That was hot, that was crazy.”

“I knew you’d like it,” Yuri weakly says, a bright but tired smile on her lips as she looks back to her boyfriend. She turns back to you, face in adorable scrunches “Lemme, uhm… clean up.”

“Oh, yeah.” You quickly try to get your composure, because you’re still balls deep inside her. “Fuck, sorry about that.”

“Don’t apologize.

Junseo can never hear that. He never will. And Daehwi is long asleep. Those following words are just for you.

“That was the best thing ever.”

[susansontag]

my guide to lesbian anime both canonic and subtextual

(won’t include every lesbian anime ever, this is a personal list)

the canonic-gay section:

revolutionary girl utena

nothing before or since has ever done it like this. trigger warnings for everything imaginable. loads of homosexuals in this one. gender commentary, fairytale allusions, a lot of kids who are having a hard time growing up and moving beyond their pasts. sword lesbians.

flip flappers

the problematic favourite, in that there’s at least one uncomfortable sexualised shot each episode (roughly speaking; some have none and one has even more, unfortunately), so be warned. but at its heart flipflap is about repressed cocona going on adventures with outgoing and expressive papika, and their exploration of various fantastical lands/inner worlds of people they meet. hugely inventive and pretty, and a core thread is cocona discovering she’s gay.

aoi hana (‘sweet blue flowers’)

the comfort lesbian show, with not a romantic relationship at its heart, but a friendship between two childhood friends who meet again, both of whom are gay (though only one realises this during the show’s run, as it’s based on a manga). one of them dates an upperclassman at her school, and there’s various gay and bi side characters. it’s just very wholesome, lovingly animated, sweet and sometimes painful stuff.

bloom into you

I controversially do not care that much for bloom into you, but as the best, high-production, non-skeevy yuri show in years - that is based on a manga by a woman - it’s worth mentioning. late-bloomer girl dreams of romance, though has never felt it, and finds affinity with a girl who similarly is disinclined to date. that is, until said girl says she fancies her. genuinely moving exploration of developing gay identity at times, only downside is my personal disinterest in the black haired girl. some weird ‘heightened’ moments that feel inauthentic and titillating do arise, but it’s very few - to the point where some would disagree with me on my reading of it, I’d imagine.

sailor moon

the bits which the lesbians are in, etc. it’s a classic. I haven’t watched all of it myself because I don’t care much nor do I have nostalgia for sailor moon, but it’s one of the most notable examples of a butch/masc lesbian in anime, so that’s nice.

o maidens in your savage season

nerdy teenage girls who are part of a literature club make it their quest to discover sex and dating, in various ways (unfortunately, not all of them dealt with well… teacher/student foolery that is fortunately abandoned before it gets worse but is nonetheless handled with mixed results, imo). mostly though it’s hilarious, sweet, silly, and there’s a gay girl in it, but I won’t spoil which one. adults predating on children is also handled much, much better in another of the show’s storylines, and I do appreciate it for trying to tackle that difficult subject matter.

oniisama e (‘dear brother’)

an oldie, based off a shoujo manga by one of the greatest (riyoko ikeda). there’s a central relationship to root for (better articulated in the manga), but it’s mostly just what if we were messy depressed lesbians at an all-girls school and we were also melodramatic and mean as hell.

revue starlight

what if we were at an all-girls dramatic arts school and engaged in utena-like duels to become the top performer? main implicitly gay couple with canonic side gay couples. it’s quite cute. also worth watching if you like takarazuka in any way (prestigious all-female japanese theatre troupe), because the main conceit of the school is very much based on that idea.

the gay-themes section:

sound! euphonium (season one)

in which director naoko yamada’s awesome legacy of writing lesbians and then saying “who’s to say though, ha ha” continued (she did it already with a side character in tamako market). this one is known as the gaybait to end all gaybait, but hear me out: the first, and best, season, is not only a fantastic self-contained story with many great characters and plot points, but it’s main character is undoubtedly lesbian-coded and even has a love interest you can argue about. frankly I think she’s gay-coded throughout the whole show (even when she dates a guy for two minutes), but this feels very “I wanted to focus on this compelling relationship between two female characters but the adaptation’s success meant we had to revert back to the source material in later seasons”. what we got from this is perhaps my favourite lesbian anime of all-time, following utena.

a place further than the universe

this show is about four girls who join an expedition to antarctica, and what if I told you they’re all great, believable dorky teenage characters, and they exist in a well-written and thematically satisfying show… and there’s nice lesbian implication between one of our adult female protagonists and her old (deceased; not a spoiler) friend who was the main teen girl’s mother. there’s some sad here, obviously.

puella magi madoka magica

the well-known, much beloved deconstruction of the magical girl genre is also pretty gay, as it happens (so gay in fact it started a trend of gay-coded pink+black magical girls). it’s not a particular favourite of mine, but it’s visually one of the most notable anime productions ever, so it’s well worth seeing just for that.

NANA

the 2000s manga+show about the two twenty-year-olds who meet on a train and discover they’re both called nana is also pretty gay! to the point where there are heated fandom debates about nana komatsu’s (pink one) possibly being a lesbian. they both have many relationships with guys, but it’s their bond that forms the heart of the show, and the bisexuality (or, who knows, homosexuality) of the leads is pretty undeniable. to the point where you’ll get blasted on the nana subreddit if you try and suggest otherwise.

the wild-card section:

keep your hands off eizouken!

this is a show about three oddball girls who start a club to create anime, but have to pose as the film club instead for various reasons. it’s not even subtextually gay, I just personally think that all three of the leads are gay and the whole thing feels like a very female-centred creative endeavour. hugely fun watch, and very high production values. you wouldn’t regret seeing it.

skip & loafer

these two you see here are side characters. this show is actually about mitsumi, the greatest female protagonist of this kind of shoujo-esque slice of life show, who moves from the countryside to tokyo for high school. here she meets many a misfit, including the pretty blonde and the nerd girl who have undeniable chemistry and form one of the most popular pairings in the show. it’s just a good time.

chihayafuru

I’d get in trouble for this, because the primary romance factor in the show is a famed heterosexual love triangle with chihaya at its centre and her two male childhood friends at the side. but go with me on this. chihaya is oblivious to romance and feminine socialisation, she is obsessed with a card game and with her equally dorky dark-haired rival… she’s anime’s greatest autistic lesbian lead. and you get more than what you pay for, because the two boys I mentioned? a lot of gay stuff going on there too.

the big-screen-cinematic section:

the adolescence of utena

revolutionary girl returns in the sequel of a lifetime, slightly older (sixteen, say) and gayer than ever, to escape this place with the love of her life. cue the impromptu dance sequence (with stars and rose petals)!

liz and the blue bird

the naoko yamada directed gay cinematic universe continues with a gorgeous film starring two of the side characters from sound! euphonium’s second season (not necessary to watch beforehand). that means it has plausible deniability whilst being so crazily gay it’s almost some kind of joke. this is a highly detailed, laser-focused character study of two girls in their high school band club and their ever more strained relationship. yamada never misses.

the summer

this is korean! it’s about two girls who meet at school and start dating in secret, what happens as they grow up and move to seoul, and how their relationship changes and strains when met with the conservatism of contemporary korean society. it was sweet and like aoi hana above for japanese girls, felt pretty frank to the experiences I’d imagine young korean lesbians might have.

puella magi madoka magica: rebellion

if you’re a fan of the show, you probably don’t talk about this movie. sure, it’s a visual feat, sure, it’s insanely entertaining, but it’s also frustrating and upsetting and potentially undermines the neatness of the original as a perfectly-crafted story. BUT. kyouko/sayaka becomes all but canon in it, and everything else aside, that’s all that really matters. but you should definitely watch the show beforehand.

[yumeka-sxf]

Thoughts on Spy x Family: Family Portrait

I finally got around to reading the SxF light novel, Family Portrait...and I mean "finally" because it's literally been sitting in my shelf since it was first released in English back in December of last year! I was distracted by Code White and the SxF video game which came out around the same time, but even long after that, I was having trouble getting motivated to read it. For some reason, experiencing SxF in novel format instead of in anime/manga just didn't appeal to me, plus the fact that it's not written by Endo himself (these weird preferences of mine are also why I'm not into reading fanfics either). Don't get me wrong, in general I love reading stories in prose form too, but for a series like SxF that already has such an established visual identity, it doesn't feel as "authentic" to me if that makes any sense. But I did want to read it eventually, since it is an official part of SxF media and Endo did the illustrations and does acknowledge the book (he wrote a nice afterword at the end). So I finally sat down and read it in sections over the course of this week! I'll share my brief thoughts on each of the contained stories:

Novel Mission 1

Since this was the first story in the book, it took me a while to get used to experiencing the world of SxF in novel form. There were some things I felt would have been better conveyed in anime/manga, for example, one of the very first gags about Yor misinterpreting Anya's nature class as some sort of hardcore outdoor survival trip. As I was reading that part I was like "I get the joke, but it would have been funnier if I actually saw these images and the characters' expressions with Endo's comedic illustrations." It was also a bit jarring to hear the characters thoughts and feelings from third-person narration, but I got used to it. As for the story itself, it was Damianya focused, something I'm not particularly into, but I don't mind it either. I liked the rare, soft Damian moments, and the thing with the squirrel eating Anya's peanut trail was funny. I also liked the scene at the beginning where Loid and Yor feed Bond together while Anya watches.

Novel Mission 2

Oddly, this was my favorite of the stories! Of all the characters, I think the author nailed Yuri's unhinged thoughts the best - as I was reading, I couldn't help but hear every cringe thought in his voice, which is a good sign of how well the author gets the character! I actually chuckled at a few parts too, both from his insane Yor-obsessed and anti-Loid musings, as well as from his banter with Anya. The police interrogation scene was great and would be even better if it ever gets animated! I also found it interesting that this story has the first instance where we find out what Yuri thinks about Bond (that he's fat and useless - rude!) Also his first time hearing about Franky apparently...makes we wonder if Endo will make him feel the same way if these things ever come up in the manga.

Novel Mission 3

I liked this story a lot too! I think it worked the best in novel format out of all of them, probably because it was more focused on drama and emotions than comedy. It's ironic that the two official SxF stories that feature the deeper side of Franky's character - this one and the omake chapter from volume 13 - are both not even part of the main canon! Alessa would have definitely accepted Franky's job as an informant, but he felt that someone like her should only be surrounded by "beautiful things." The poor man really needs to see that inner beauty matters too, and he has that! I also think he should have swallowed his pride and told Loid the real reason why he wanted the disguise...not that it would have changed the outcome. Poor Franky.

Novel Mission 4

This was a cute Forger-focused story, but like the first one, I felt it had parts that would have been more effective in anime/manga form, for example, "hair monster" Yor and whatever hideous painting Felix ended up making! But despite that, it was still funny and cute. Though I do think the author went a tad overboard with Yor's flustered antics...they just kept going and going, lol. Also, like the movie, we have another scenario of Loid getting flung into the air by Yor but landing gracefully on his feet (though this instance was much tamer since she wasn't drunk and only pushed him instead of hit him). Again, maybe I would have appreciated the humor in this story better if I saw it in anime/manga with Endo's hilarious designs and expressions, but for what it was, it was enjoyable enough.

Short Novel

This extra short story would be perfect as a reintroduction story for a future anime season...maybe one day!

-----

Overall, the Family Portrait novel is a nice addition to the Spy x Family universe. Even though I feel the humor in the series is most effective in illustrated form, it's still nice to have more stories in the canon, especially ones that show new sides to the characters, like the Franky and Yuri stories. Like the movie, it's debatable if this novel should be considered true canon or not, but personally, I don't find anything in it that contradicts canon, at least not yet. So yeah, definitely check out the novel if you haven't already! 😁

[nanakah]

hello hello, I took the alien stage pill. howdy fellow sufferers

Honestly, my first reaction to basically everything was "awww, they come in sets and are all without exception horribly doomed no matter their specs (loops cool music and vids)"

I'd seen some of VIVINOS' team works without realizing it was the same artist (my favorites being Beloved and Otomeroid) so it was rather shocking to learn of a "series" with a fandom as active/relatively large as Alien Stage without ever actually stumbling upon it before...

Anyways. I like the concept, and Hyuna+Luka in particular, a whole lot. In spite of all the jokes about only yuri and yaoi losing, my spider sense says they'll get their turn of crashing horribly soon and I wanna stay here to witness it burn beautifully, of course.

TL;DR OMG HYULUKA IS SO DELICIOUS

general yapping about all alien stage duos under the cut and some Hyuna/Luka considerations and theories

disclaimer: long, chaotic post ahead - i wrote most of it during revenge bedtime procrastination so I'm kinda just rambling/discussing my general impressions and vibes here instead of formatting it nicely or properly illustrating my points. good luck if you choose to stick around and make yourself comfy

alien stage impressions under read more - also SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS

funny thing - I got into alien stage completely by chance after checking out some related vids to my Love and Deepspace twitter spree and avoiding my responsibilities. Ivan's Black Sorrow made a very strong impression and I loved his eyes, so I kept going deeper down the rabbit role and felt fascinated by the web of dynamics between the characters each time I took in a little more of the plot.

(His eyes are so cool and expressive.....I was already loving everything prior and was excited to continue, but Ivan was definitely the one to sell me on the concept more strongly and eat up the rest.)

It was interesting seeing "love" portrayed under such dire conditions and I kept wondering how come the aliens are so stupid they chose a 1vs1 PVP combat format with their beloved pets instead of the optimal formation of idol units and at least duos versus each other to utilize their feelings of love. Why would they do that?

That first innocent musing made me realize how clever the team behind ALNST is. The whole thing seems to be operating as a metaphor/commentary about how predatory the real idol industry is (the concept of anakt garden really sounds like the average idol trainee camp experience and the bonds they form with their group mates) and how heartless guardian (parental) figures can be in a society that is heavily utilitarian and barely gives agency to either their own children or sentient beings like animals that we keep as pets.

So in that world, the sacrifices of being an idol are literal and humans themselves are "pets" - with all the implications that come with "being dependent on a species that does not properly comprehend them". At times, the way they refer to the fandom of each character even seems to be tongue in cheek as to how "we" too are watching the story for entertainment and making fanbases for each character and reacting like some of the in-universe alien fans.

Therefore, it's no brainer that the answer to my initial question was: aliens/Segyein don't understand how to utilize human bonds and emotions to their maximum efficiency in the first place. They know interaction between humans seems to be important and produces more beautiful songs. However, they probably experience those feelings differently and most of them are likely unable to truly empathize with human pain, ethics or feelings. (And believe me, even some people have a hard time believing other species benifit from socialization, so aliens being that way is understandable). Perhaps the awful acts of the Segyein mutilating their pet human is no different from pulling a butterfly's wings to a human or injecting colored fluid into a flower. The glimpses of their buildings and tv show that they have the same sort of "do they have rights?" feelings and similar moral conflicts to what we have in the real world about species we don't understand fully.

I think it's really challenging to analyze a work attempting to guess future developments when you don't know the creator too well. In spite of looping OTOMEROID I wouldn't say I know VIVINOS and her team deeply as an admirer. But from the overall tone of the videos in her channel, I could pick up on a fascination with "extremes" of emotion and exploring the hypocrisy of society. Human/animal experimentation and materialism/religion/consumerism are topics that come up often. Love is also hardly ever portrayed as a simple or benevolent feeling alone - there's unrequited love, obsession, insanity, many facets of that feeling on the channel. Some works are more straightforward and focus on the visual presentation, others seem to have a deeper story behind it.

The technical quality of the Alien Stage MVs is extremely impressive, I had a blast looking at the patreon storyboards and feeling like "wow, a person actually made this". It seriously got me inspired to feel like drawing more to get out of my own artblock and to pick up on old OCs to show them some love. In the era of AI, this is a joy to get to feel. It all definitely feels like a well-put together labor of love. I'm super weak to things brimming with passion like this, it's contagious!!!!

Now that I've tried my best to make an eloquent opening and act like I'm not at all just a fangirl foaming at the mouth with this intense concept (I keep crying that I wanna see either Aka or Ohkawa try their hand at a death game scenario) and at the sight of a tragic toxic duo with a backstory of a deeply rooted mutual obsession/love and fall out (wiping drool out of the corner of my mouth as we speak), let's talk a little more about the story. In order to make sense out of my ramblings and projections, let me explain my thoughts on the other duos besides my bias first.

Mizi and Sua set the tone to their universe as well as serve as an explanation as to why "idols" work well to represent their conflict and struggle - I'm fresh out of Oshi no Ko here, so this feels equal parts like a comfort zone and everything but comfortable and hellish to go over again. But, to put it briefly, the adoration of someone as an entertainer that you want to support also overlaps with the word reserved for adoring "an image or representation of a god used as an object of worship" - idol.

Humans, stripped of their power and autonomy after arrogantly believing they were superior to everyone else and were the only beings in the vast universe, have been subjugated by other species. Because of the bleak, unforgiving circumstances they were faced with afterwards, the surviving ones were turned into luxury pets and stripped of their freedom. Free will made them children of God before, so people have forgotten all about the "God" who couldn't answer their prayers/save them. But, as Mizi says, the belief in God is innate to human nature. You are more likely live in this world successfuly if you have someone to look up to or a reason to survive.

When God seems so far away and so cruel...what they can do is look to each other as their "Gods". Because a belief in God is ultimately, a cry for salvation and acceptance...."The Bible makes it clear that “God is love” (1 John 4:8). He isn't just loving, but he is the very definition of love."Therefore, all characters are, in some way, looking for salvation and being constantly tested and brutally being forced to show off their humanity through the lens of how love affects them - and not at the privacy of their inner thoughts or anything. All of that in order to portray different aspects of "love", adoration and what it means to be human. To have a belief on the unseen - "what is essential is invisible to the eye".

IT'S ALIEN AMERICAN IDOL MEETS DANGANRONPA. WHOO.

(gOD I wish we could have gotten Luka vs Sua or vs Ivan in some way. That feels like it would be extremely close and entertaining to see. Am I losing my humanity? Why is my keyboard slimy? Am I becoming a Segyein ....?)

Of course, because I fell for all those deliciously doomed themes like the good CLAMP/Akasaka foolish nerd I am, I bought patreon access day one. Although some setting details were unexpected, I was pretty satisfied with my overall initial grasp on most of the characters. If you found me through the tags and didn't already follow me, my disclaimer here so you get to know me is that I easily gravitate to polarizing characters or doomed ships like a curse. There are also certain Themes that follow me like a plague and I could see some of my favorite characters' shadows on the doomed kids I liked right away. Like an itch to spot something more to what is being shown.

Therefore right away, Luka and Hyuna caught my eye big time. (literally, when I watched sweet dream I kept pausing and going - whOA WHO IS THE COOL GIRL WITH THE CIG. Wait wait wait show me more of the boy that looks dead inside overstimulated by the flashing lights!)

I don't really have any pretension to be quoted on anything here or say things verbatim (Patreon says it's fine to produce derivative content based on what's there, but as expected, it's enforced not to directly share it so I can't really go argument-evidence here by presenting it) and have only seen pictures of the artbook secondhand by a friend, so I'll have my fun here making commentary loosely based on extra content and sporadically showing off pretty MV captures.

Anyway.

We're introduced to this universe through the jarring cruelty of ROUND 1, contrasting a harmonic, beautiful, lullaby-like melody with a harsh outcome. Like Mizi, unless we got spoiled beforehand, we don't really know anything about what's about to horrifically transpire. And though she got education, it feels like the teachings about what death or the Alien Stage would be like were horribly sugar coated or distorted to her, as incentive to give their best performances - like sacrificing themselves was a good thing. The extra materials back this up with Mizi's first interview about "My Clematis" - it's like they're told they're simply going back to their "origins" entity (The Grand Ankt) and it's a pretty and peaceful thing. We're shown how bad humans have it in their society and simultaneously get a montage of a cute, healthy, heartwarming relationship between the two girls and a deep "pure" love, as well as feel the weight of Sua's sacrifice and how badly it hurts Mizi. You're told that Sua is her God, her Universe in a Godless world - only to have her ripped away and "God" basically slaughtered for cheap entertainment. Some of the extra materials put it as a certain "mutual love" between Sua and Mizi.

It's interesting how we're shown a stage and don't know what to expect at first - since the girls seem "calm" and happy to express their love, but there's an increasing sense of dread until the finality of Sua's death hits and the pretty, shining girl we see in the flashbacks becomes an empty husk. The MVs seem all to be roughly designed around creating a surprise at the end or recontextualizing something we have seen previously.

I won't discuss Till and Ivan at length at this time, because that would get too long and demands it's own post (I sure as hell rewatched Unknown, Black Sorrow and Cure many times though), but the key part for me here is - they similarly express "love", but through another facet - obsession of a one-sided love and the desire to reach salvation or a reason to endure the world because of that, too. To the point of choosing the chance of love over salvation, expressed by Till letting go of Ivan's hand when they had a chance to escape (not wanting to leave Mizi behind most likely) and Ivan's kiss and decision to strangle Till to give his own life in exchange for his/finally getting to express his "shallow emotions" he perceives as something that won't deeply scar Till (but it does, and it mattered, far more than he could ever have known). It's interesting that although Mizi calls Sua a God, they develop something closer to a balanced, mutual relationship, as much as their lack of understanding of "human relationship" allows - they connect deeply. Ivan, according to the comics, sees himself in Sua, but it's deeply frustrating how he couldn't build the same sort of connection with Till and felt like he could only maintain a bond through violence.

Mizi seems to be the only human who was raised in a "stable home" (her alien seems to actually love her closest to a mother), but that's not enough to protect her from pain - after all, the alien's reasoning was that if Mizi likes singing, she should join. Yolo! Your human baby's life is so short! Sounds like outdoor cat owners to me. Ugh. All other pet humans are going through some flavor of parental abuse, and it all reflects in how they express their emotions and what sort of decisions they tend to take.

Till, in contrast to all that, more closely resembles the definition of looking at Mizi like an oshi/idol as a comfort to run from the pains of his life - he always looks hurt or abused, but Mizi is like medicine that even watching from far away makes him feel "saved" due to nurturing that "first love" that is heavily idealized. It's interesting how his character that is first introduced as somewhat violent or wild because of the smashing guitar and "addict"/drug imagery turns out to be one of the most sensitive.

The cloaked figure of Mizi in Blink Gone seems to resemble a saint or Mary (mother) holding a child in her lap as he takes his last breaths. She rushed into the crowd in a desperate attempt to save or at least comfort him in his predicament. Till's final position even resembles that of being crucified.

All that, however, makes Till unable to see Ivan properly - who is constantly around him and yearning for his attention, protecting and loving him in desperate ways that he doesn't realize until the very last minute. He is also seemingly detaching himself from the "real" world as a very "pure" child (shown in the way he loves with full devotion and his artistic inclinations), which of course, makes Ivan painful to face - who is a grounding entity and a reminder of the real world. The one who touches his wounds, who is "there" and not unreachable like a flower at the top of a mountain. That love between Ivan and Till got expressed in a way that was painful to both, but a very human act of a clashing selfish and selfless-ness.

None of them are built for this. They're trying to survive.

So far, what I've got is...Mizi and Sua set a standard of what is closest to a mutual love that was growing together in a relatively equal and healthy way. Ivan and Till were reworked to avoid overlap with them and are chosen to portray the sense of an immature, obsessive love and clashing emotions. It's interesting to me how much the creators stress the "one-sided" and controlling nature of Ivan for behind the scenes, and I feel like this does not mean that Till couldn't possibly return his feelings - after all, the Actor AU does show great chemistry between them. It's more like, within their living conditions and because of the emotional immaturity of both of them, they literally could not see eye to eye - Till looking at an idol out of reach (Mizi), and Ivan choosing to seek out his attention through violent means that confused Till, thus he was unable to respond to the intensity of what he felt and grow into it.

NOW. TO THE MAIN COURSE THAT IS ROTTING MY BRAIN: HYULUKA.

If we've got all those bases covered so far...where does that leave Hyuna and Luka?

(This is the most Mello/Near-like I've ever seen another ship pull off. My inner 13 yo is screaming. They're both incredibly gorgeous. How is a hetero couple simultaneously so BL and yuri-like in DRAMA AND IMAGERY? CLAMP would be proud...)

You see, there's no official answer about the true nature of their bond yet.

But I have a lot of speculations. It clearly looks like a rotten, strangled-by-the-red-string-of-fate sort bond that is just up my alley. THE MOST FUN IS GETTING TO BABBLE BEFORE GETTING AN ASSERTIVE ANSWER. I'm all for making a fool of myself, so let's get down to it.

To put it simply - I believe Hyuna and Luka's role is expressing the extremes of the setting itself and what "to love" means within it, with a turn for the worse and the tragedy of "not understanding" even if there is love.

How do you conquer an oppressive world in which all odds are against you? Would you overtake it through rebellion or would you strike at it from within?

In a world in which God's teachings have become lost to time and difficult to believe, does love strengthen or weaken you? If it causes pain and destruction, can it still be called love?

I think Hyuna and Luka are standing at opposite sides of those beliefs, and cannot understand each other's mindset.

Seems simple enough to write Luka as a mere villain final boss since he seems to be enjoying himself at the evil death game and Hyuna as the nice rebel who wants to save everyone, right? But it's confirmed Hyuna wasn't really trying to rescue more people like she had an opportune moment to do for Mizi.

The artbook also says something incredibly interesting about what the "Luka Syndrome" mentioned in one of the MVs really means - Luka's prestige as a performer is raising the prestige of pet humans. He also believes "Hyuna would be safe with him" - Why is that?

I think they might actually have similar goals and a similar stubborness in which they believe themselves to be the correct one and the other to be pitiful and foolish. Hyuna is trying to overthrow a system that is well-established and has far more power or influence than them, therefore she needs to resort to drastic measures and flashy means to assert dominance over the alien society.

Luka on the other hand, feels like he is using the system against it and exercising his own humanity while at it. Rather than tackling the incredibly daunting task of being a rebel with guns blazing, Luka became a master of the stage in a way that makes humans gain influence and thus become more valuable.Even if I try to think of it as "he's just trying to survive", that doesn't feel enough - because whenever he is not on stage, Luka looks dead inside already.

Especially in the arts he looks like a younger child or teenager, except for the ones after he seems more consistently approached by Hyuna. It's hard for me to think what moves him is a survival instinct. He is also portrayed like the typical "golden kid" syndrome victim - someone so systematically beaten to satisfy their narcissist guardian figure and submitted to so much pain that they eventually absorb part of that mindset as a way to have agency and autonomy over themselves. It gives the illusion of being successful and thus that the abuse was "effective", but it's like a curse that is difficult to break from.

I think both of them are older for a thematic reason. It feels like it could represent what it feels like, as adults, to no longer be able to hold onto naive or idealistic things about the world or society due to ignorance and having to choose a path to express your ideas and reach your goals through your "work".

Hyuna is guns blazing and "adult pleasures" - singing to an underground stage, trying to scrub off the wounds of her past with alcohol, and it's interesting that her guardian alien is portrayed like an "absent" parent figure - they have an interest in humans, but doesn't care about watching Hyuna when she first was eligible for Alien Stage. I wonder if they even are the one looking for her at all - seems to me it's more of an alien police thing because of her "crimes". Under that seemingly "thick" skin though, it seems clear that Hyuna is deeply affected by Luka still, and the loss of her brother. She deals with her wounds by not really dealing with them at all and guess what - it's a weak point. Her song is uplifting and refreshing, but she clearly demonstrates that closing your eyes to trauma and purely moving forward doesn't make them go away. In that sense, Mizi is a way she is trying to "mentor" someone navigate through loss.

I love outcasts and mildly autistic-coded characters, so I gravitated to Sua, Ivan and Luka right away.

(Extroverted cutie and the doomest doomer of the bunch. As a side note, their character design alone and contrast is genius and gorgeous. I'd expect 90% of the time for Luka to be the designated BL character and hardly do I ever see his archetype paired with the sort of sharp, striking beauty that Hyuna has so I definitely got giddy with them right away. She reminds me a lot of Michiko Malando and Luka reminds me of Near, two characters I love a whole lot and funnily enough have the same mbti types the artbook describes them as - ESTP and INTJ. Ankt garden Luka looks somewhat closer to the AU versions of Luka, so gotta love both his origins and his twisted post-alnst/hyuun woo self)

I believe Hyuna bundles Luka with that trauma of grief and loss, and it's still unclear what their roles are in it and after the fact. While singing all in verses "We only get one life, so I'm living mine for me/'Cause I'm the one from your wildest dreams", Luka's face flashes through Hyuna's mind before even her brothers, like it's something that's always on the back of it and barely suppressed.

See...since VIVINOS loves the "more than meets the eye"/twist concept, something I'm expecting is for Hyuna's feelings not to be as black and white as blaming Luka and actually. It obviously was dysfunctional and isn't that....delicious???

I feel like a one-sided love or obsession wouldn't make sense to repeat as themes, and because of the heavy trauma associated in the backstory, it's not like a "healthy mutual love". To bridge the themes of MiziSua and IvanTill, I think Hyuna and Luka are being told in a way to express love as something that can also destroy instead of save, and their clashing ideologies come from a place of wanting to think "-I'M- right and want to be your god", instead of ever having been able to understand each other properly.

They have a similarly "corrupt" love that has a lot of guilt and regret built into it. Even with something awful as what happened to her brother, it's curious that Hyuna's mind first thinks of Luka in an "enamored" light - the scene looks pretty tender - but that's also attached to the weight of Hyun Woo's death.

I think It's likely that the twist is Hyuna having been the one who hurt her brother, even, considering the dynamic in these comics:

Luka and Hyun Woo compete for Hyuna's attention, and it's to be expected that none of them understand the boundaries and definitions of love too well. Hyuna and Hyun Woo seem to be naive and relatively raised in a decent way, submitted to superiority tests like the rest, but not directly abused. They seem to express their love for each other in a cheerful, healthy way, Hyuna probably because of her closeness to her brother (which is unusual for other pet humans to be able to do) is extremely physical in how she shows affection. She doesn't really reprimand Luka, and that creates an unhealthy dynamic in which Luka plays the victim - in spite of starting things - to enjoy Hyuna's attention. There is a cute comic that looks silly, but encapsulates it all:

Luka is a little shit that wants to be pampered. He knows he is physically weaker - if you come across a rabbit being hurt by a wolf, you wouldn't suspect the rabbit provoked it. So Hyuna constantly seems to take Luka's side regardless of what happened, wanting to have that protector role.

Luka on the other hand, has no reference of what it's like to be "loved". He is systematically abused and treated like an object - therefore, he perceives relationships in terms of "ownership". And I don't think Hyuna truly understands just what she is enabling when she encourages Luka to act the way he does or thinks his neediness is "cute".

Honestly, I think there's strong sexual abuse imagery in Luka's art and the presentation of his stage image as someone taking charge of their objectification. His clothing for stage always shows off his body one way or another and both Hyuna and him have this sensual imagery and approach to others, as if "reclaiming one's own body". The contrast of Luka's blank expression and the red collar indicating a mental breakdown in that artwork above featuring Heperu's shadow approaching him is truly chilling.

That boy has no reference of what a familial bond or love is like. And both his introspective nature and abuse seem to make it even worse for him to connect with his peers- in the artbook his only relationships listed are Hyuna and Mizi, in very negative ways. He is also said to have retreated deeper into his own world, because "no one can understand him". Again, checks out with the imagery of "gifted son" that is treated like a narcissistic parent's doll and that becomes desensitized to many things over time.

His alien guardian Heperu even looks vaguely phallic and Luka has body language of "trying to disappear" or soothing himself when not up the stage - hugging knees, looking smaller, sucking on sleeves, stimming with toys (rubik's cube). The scars on his chest seem related to the abuse of submitting him to pain to overcome fear and I theorize the scars on the side may have been for plastic surgery like abdominoplasty or even possibly removing ribs. Normally that would be done from the back, but hey - alien science, and he already had "tainted" scarred skin on the front, so it would make sense to try preserving his back. His waist is drawn really really thin. It's also mentioned that he had a strict diet even though he is a big eater - that is, Heperu is deeply violating his agency in accordance with Lookism.

Luka has all the makings of a really tragic character and reminds me of Kamiki Hikaru's construction in Oshi no Ko. A victim turned abuser in some ways, as a way to seek autonomy, self expression and living for their ideals and love, no matter how twisted it has become.

There's a comic that has a "flashback" of anakt garden and Hyuna being asked by Luka if she likes to sing. The POV of Hyuna's face looks as soft as Luka's does from hers. She tells him that they don't have freedom for anything else, but when she is up at the stage, it's like her life is "her own", so she likes it. The image of Luka singing as an adult suggests that even now, those are the words he pictures and that is the image of Hyuna that is alive in his mind.

In a way, both of them are deeply attached to the past, and while Hyuna wants to shut it down completely and regrets it having happened, Luka's feelings are twisted.

We don't know much about the kiss. Considering the "sucking on forehead" comics, I get the feeling Hyuna was startled by the sudden escalation from Luka acting as a passive, cute pet and jumping her with so much intensity, but may not necessarily have pushed him away. The following fight could either have happened because Hyuna became withdrawn as a result of suddenly becoming aware of the effect she was having on Luka and what their feelings for each other were (since previously, she might not have been able to tell the difference between being all over her brother and all over Luka) /or/ the scenario played out like the forehead sucking. She didn't dislike it, but Luka became insistent or they got caught in a way that Hyuun Woo had no context for, thus assuming Luka was forcing her.

And there is a third option too that now I think about it, seems the /most/ likely: the growing proximity to Hyuna made Luka's feelings of "wanting ownership and exclusivity" even deeper because of love and lust, as simply being assured he is "loved" doesn't seem to be enough for Luka. It could be that Hyuna in fact disliked his attempt of kissing her and became more distant to him. Thus, he orchestrated for Hyuna to take his side once again for validation in a reckless way - but the results were "better than he thought" when it resulted in Hyuun Woo's death. Because, that is a price so heavy that it feels like "wow, you actually chose me".

This scene is super interesting, I love Luka's expression. It's joyful in a "perverse" way. He was successful in trapping his beloved Hyuna. And it seems that the emotion is so intense, like he is finally free from the mask of pitiful wounded animal with no agency over himself that the sheer ecstasy might have caused a seizure or heart attack, hence his eyes looking glassy afterwards and his fingers finally turning the blue/purple hue we see on his older design.

Skimming through the patreon posts, I was pleasantly surprised to realize my gut feeling about Ivan and Luka having a similar core wasn't wrong. Sua in comparison is the scenario of someone who doesn't go off to the deep end as the two of them. It's often stressed that the team was worried about establishing Luka and Ivan as distinguishable - their personalities are similar, but their masks are different. Ivan presents himself as the "big bro", while actually being a boy struggling with properly expressing emotions that went as far as practicing smiles and expresions at the lake. Whereas Luka is like a porcelain doll and passive - austere, even...but what about his real self?

We're cleverly prevented from seeing an introductory MV for Luka, as round 4 doesn't happen. And for the subsequent videos, Luka shows himself partially by not disclosing his POV, but showing important sides of himself - the urge to control and the attempts to "become whatever is desired of him". A blank slate.

In a sense, that's implying to me Ivan and Luka's stage presence is an expression of their "inner selves", where their feelings and thoughts become bare. Ivan does so by casting aside his big bro warmth and stepping in as the image of a serious-faced, strongly devoted man that is coming apart at the seams with the weight of his immaturity, sadness, love and obsession.

Luka's stage presence is a distant cry from his image of passiveness and class behind the scenes. On stage, he is a seasoned performer and a calculating prince that enjoys pulling the strings to reach the ideal performance as seen in his inner world. He cunningly displays a different expression between the audience and his partners to achieve the ideal results. Luka acts like both a director and an actor while performing, in order to construct his vision - He's bold, confident and invades people's personal spaces.

(What a condescending little shit. I love him. His expression seems to be saying something like..."Done already? Hmph. I expected more of you. You need to do something for me to do my part and shine, too."

A point I theorize about Ruler of My Heart - Hyuna says in the artbook, I think, that Mizi reminds her of herself. Luka would be able to pick up on that also, especially since Mizi had just been broken by the loss of the one she loved most and formerly had that spark of "hope and dreaming high" in her eyes. Luka may have chosen the song specifically to have Mizi recreate the "role of Hyuna" envisioned for it - as in, he never expected her to be obedient at all. He was riling her up to feel what Hyuna might have responded like to this song. But the Hyuna in his idealization is probably "blazing, absolute and strong" - instead of shutting down and giving up singing. Mizi lets herself get intimidated by his provocation into silence, but when she loses it to punch him in the face with no regard for the consequences - like Hyuna surely would do - is when he finally smirks. It's also a mockery of letting emotions take her over, securing his win and further reinforcing he is "in the right". )

Another interesting tidbit is that Luka's personality isn't of the ethereal "pitiful-but-nice" character, but rather something that "fits VIVINOS taste". He is also compared frequently to Ivan in personality/mindset, who is described as a "bad boy" with a possessive/manipulative streak. If the sides of Ivan we get to see that related to Till are fairly tame and the team worries so much about contrast, that seems to imply that Luka embraces the more extreme parts left out of Ivan.

Even more interesting than that is the core of Luka's character inspiration - "the little prince", which I assume most people have read before. It's a children's book about an adult meeting a little prince from space and basically sharing life lessons.

If we look a little beyond the "cute blond kid"/moon motif...the most striking aspect about the Little Prince is probably the idea of the rose and the fox. The immature prince is taught the concept of love and responsibility by a wild fox - that to tame someone is to make them unique, and it's the time spent nurturing that love that makes it precious. The prince had been frustrated by a Rose he thought he loved, but grew annoyed by because he could not understand her. He also was confused upon realizing there were many roses in the universe, but his was too selfish and flawed. So is she not as unique as he thought? He starts missing the rose, and learns that there IS a difference - none of the roses are "his" or sound like "his" - because if they have tamed each other, going forward, he isn't just any little boy to his rose anymore - he is "the" boy, and she is "the" rose, unique in the universe.

This feels extremely relevant to a character presented as a "product" of gene editing and, basically, being created in a lab. The implication to me is that there may be many other "Luka"-like humans - the vast array of congenital diseases he manifests such as heart disease, Raynaud syndrome, asthma and chronic migraine all make him sound like their universe's equivalent of a white pug dog with dubious origins to boot.

What makes that test tube baby, raised by a ruthless alien that doesn't care about him as more than a way to vicariously live a life of success and luxury, unique in that case?

Love.

And my take is that, the fox and rose to his little prince are the siblings Hyun Woo and Hyuna.

(I'm suddenly reminded of the Vanitas no Carte Louis-Domi-Noé trio. Why do those never end well?)

IMO the rift created between Hyuna's brother and Luka wasn't necessarily there from the start. Before getting more strongly attached or opening up to Hyuna, Luka looks extremely detached. Hyuna's brother looked like the picture of excitement and youth, so it feels like he could have reached out to the quiet boy first and Hyuna tagged along. The settings mention something along the lines of Hyuna not quite being the origin of the "dreamer" outlook, but being inspired by her brother, and I can picture it.

Hyuna's MV All in and her relationship with Mizi painted to me the picture of a girl that is naturally attractive - her drive and sunny disposition are simply dazzling. But, underneath, there seems to be "something" doesn't it? I think Hyuna's charm comes from a mix of strength and vulnerability. She seems like the type of person to cope with humor and being flirty in order to lift people's moods and surprise them, but Hyuna herself can have quite heavy and serious feelings. The somber look suits her, and it's overall impressive that she didn't completely break because of her brother. It's like her innate talent for performing draws people to her, but at the same time she can sustain an illusion of "closeness", her true worries and wounds are kept deep inside and she doesn't let others truly see into her.

So.

What's shown in Blink Gone to me is that Luka's not merely surviving a death game, he is enjoying the show and trying to feel alive. To someone like him that probably already feels dead inside all the time and was "abandoned" by Hyuna, there is nothing much to look forward to. We don't know what happened between Hyuun Woo's death and their first alien stage run (quite a lot, since Hyuna even lost a leg) ot the timing of their relationship fall out. Given their memories and image of eachother, it does seem to be implied they were already going separate ways right after the incident.

It's likely that what connects Luka to Hyuna's memory the most is the feeling of performing itself - the one time he gets to be free. Luka acts like he is superior to the other pet humans for having "figured out" the system and feeding into it, and looks down on them for having no control over their emotions. But does he really have total control over his own?

In spite of all the abuse he embraced as his own will or believing he could truly get any power by playing the game according to its rules and "overcoming fear", someone as unpredictable and impulsive as Till is the natural enemy of someone like Luka. He had the upper hand as long as it stayed within his plan, but Till suddenly going as far as going back to the green light indicator was worrisome. Luka's Stamina is actually rather crappy, so if Till did decide to go all out, he might have been cooked.

I think, to Luka, it's probably about more than keeping himself alive. And Till flipping the game then would have made him waste his life on a performance that was supposed to be easy -and- it must be annoying that Till strayed off-script. My hypothesis is that he wants to reach out to Hyuna, still - either by increasing the influence of humans to shift the world closer to the one she envisioned, or by putting his life in the line at the stage as many times as possible to feel the "weight" of her presence as if she still were by his side or to grow so famous that she cannot ignore or escape him.

Deliciously hypocritical of him to look down on others so much, when Hyuna's unannounced presence shook him so badly he turned his back to the stage and stared at her with an expression we'd never seen before.

My take is that her walking in like this is seriously the worst scenario to him. Luka expresses in the artbook that he pities Hyuna and that her safety would have been guaranteed with him, so - because of his influence - I think he might actually have gone to the Alien Stage again to secure his power status AND request to keep Hyuna out of it. A condescending sort of domestication we know she would hate, but would keep her safe.

But see. Even if she wasn't under his care, being out there causing a ruckus is one thing - she's alive and kicking, not really in the slaughterhouse. He can live with that. So, he sings to his heart's content. And...

His sneering that people are suuuch rookies at controlling their emotions...

Sooo weak to let their emotions and regrets dominate them and make them lose sight of the stage, compared to his Super Competent self that can overcome fear and control his own heart rate...

All came back to bite him in the ass, like an idiot.

All other characters were pitted against their worst case nightmare scenario, and I doubt the Prince will be an exception. I really don't think his type of obsessive is wanting to be superior to or beat Hyuna at performing either, even if it's his guardian's mindset (it seems Heperu feels inferior to Hyuna's guardian and adopted Luka simply as a means of beating him - so seems very possible he will push for having the two face off and prove Luka's "superiority").

No matter what he does now, it's either Hyuna against Mizi at the risk of death or Hyuna against him. Hyuna's a wanted criminal - there is absolutely no talking a way out of that one. Not only that, Hyuna's bleeding from her wound already. Luka facing against Hyuna as the second time champion would mean being forced to choose - keep rulling the stage, or chose the one who was his guiding light in the first place?

The imagery from the sweet dream opening (as well as Luka having covered that song) is "release" - Luka dying at Hyuna's hand even if it's not something she can truly do with pleasure, no matter how much she copes with her past wounds by hating him. I wonder if it's a red herring or if it will play out, I particularly want whatever will allow to explore their character, feelings and motivation the deepest.

I don't think Hyuna wandered onto the stage for his sake - it seems like it's for Mizi, who is completely frozen. Hyuna probably has up until now coped with hating Luka because he represented everything she was rebelling against - the "system" itself. A nasty cog in the engine of the aliens who, even if not directly, ultimately were the cause of the entire context that stripped her away of her freedom and lead to her precious brother's death.

However...

My guess to what's happening here isn't "wow your outfit is so slutty" or "you've grown". It's more like...Luka suddenly looks too human.

He wasn't supposed to.

...Phew. That's all for now. The ADHD gets strong when I'm talking about something that tickles my brain, so I hope that wasn't too messy/unintelligible to follow with the back and forth jumping timelines or repeating points of interest I did.

Well! I really, really wish there was more for me to keep going, but for now I'll live with overthinking with what we have. I might do separate analysis/speculation for the MVs if I have a deadline I'm procrastinating on come up the time.

Bottom line is, I think all those characters are very interesting, but Hyuluka are the ones I'm rotating like a rotisserie chicken in my mind. Plz hurt me more VIVINOS team and thanks for the good fucking food

[refinedpet]

Heck it, I'll make a proper pinned

Salutations! Hello! My name is Ashley, your likely not so local, lesbian, early twenties, beautiful trans girlthing with undiagnosed mental problems.

I usually post about Trans stuff, as helping other transfems in any way I can is important to me.

I also post about whatever else is on my mind, I don't really have much of a filter. Usually expect stuff about Video Games.

I also don't hesitate to reblog horny stuff, and I'm a kinky bitch so that filter doesn't exist. Usually not anything with nudity, but no promises. This Blog is 18+ Only.

My old pinned was my award winning post

It makes a great vibe check and did a phenomenal job scaring away chasers. Watch if if you're not a coward

Stuffs I like!!!!:

I play alot of video games, some of my favorite series are Xenoblade Chronicles (This is the quickest way to my heart), Dragon Quest, Pikmin, Fire Emblem (Unfortunate), Kirby, Splatoon, Shin Megami Tensei, Megaman

I love the NeiR series! Fantasy Life and Gnosia are some of my all time favorites.

I've been lifelong way too Pokémon obsessed

I play a wide variety of stuff, and it'd be difficult to name everything. I play a bit of everything but I'm mostly a single player girly and I adore JRPG's.

I used to be more of an anime fan, but don't actively watch new stuff alot. I've seen a ton of anime and read alot of manga.

Stuff like JoJo's Bizzare Adventure, Chainsaw Man, The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya, The Pet Girl of Sakuraso, Yuru Yuri, Sailor Moon and many more are very important to me.

As said I'm well experienced in anime, and love getting to talk about it with people.

I'm likely to do the occasional horny post, but usually don't reblog or post nudity. Still this Blog is 18+

I'm a kinky bitch, and have spent alot of time in online lewd role play communities. As a result I'm desensitized to alot of it and very casual about things.

I've been called a succubus alot, and have a history of awakening new kinks in people.

If I ever make a NSFW sideblog I'll give more specifics there. But I'm always down to talk with girls (18+) about stuff!

Alright, wrap it up already:

Now, here's a collection of thoughts and things I couldn't be bothered to fit in naturally anywhere.

The tag I use for my original posts is #Ashley.txt if you want to see just them and not the mass of stuff I reblog. For older ones I used #skyla.ramble if you wanna see those. Yes Skyla is not my name anymore, no I'm not changing the tag, You have to earn calling me that.

As stated before my name is Ashley! I prefer Ashey as a nickname over Ash. And I encourage people to spell it however they like best. Having some people say Ashy or Ashie is cute! You can call me Ash, but don't call me that exclusively.

I'm a She/Her - It/It's Girly. Those are the ones I fuck with. Referring to me with It/It's is the way to my heart, but I like being called both.

I'm an attention whore

I love Chappell Roan

I meow and bite, don't worry about it

Mutuals are always so incredibly welcome and encouraged to send me a DM or ask for my Discord (that's where I prefer talking)

I love all transfems. No matter what arbitrary reason you have that makes you think you're not enough or worthy of it. All trans people have a space in this community. You are so incredibly important 💖

Okay, I've gone on for more than long enough. I'll add to this if I ever need to

Have some pictures of me to finish off because I'm hot as hell

[adorablegorilla]

I think the beauty of Watamote and what makes it truly the special is that the manga goes from being like, "look at how cringy yet relatable this weirdo is" to "look at how cringy yet relatable ALL these weirdos are!"

All the friends Tomoko makes and all the people she meets, no matter how well-adjusted they initially seem, all end up being weirdos with their own cringy habits. From Nemo's habit of doing anime overreactions, to Yoshida's anger at being called a delinquent being a self-reinforcing reputation, to Yuri's complete inability to handle feeling embarrassed or self-conscious, to Mako trying so hard to be considerate of everyone she wraps around to being inconsiderate, to Ucchi's... Ucchi, none of them are immune to tripping over themselves in misunderstandings that somehow only further cement their friendship.

The archetypal bully characters, one of which literally starts out as a faceless mook, become humanized too as everyone's weird little eccentricities are laid bare. When everyone has accepted and become used to everyone's flaws, their gossip and badmouthing doesn't give them any social edge anymore, and when that happens it's revealed that without it they're just as socially inept and clueless as everyone else.

Even Tomoko's brother Tomoki, arguably the most "normal" character, is a huge ball of stress and nerves simply because he doesn't know how to deal with unwanted advances except by scowling angrily (which just makes him look more like a bad boy and thus more appealing to all the girls he wishes would leave him alone). The only character who seems to have everyone together is Asuka, and really it seems like that's only because she already accepted everyone's weirdness - and her own attraction to that weirdness - long ago.

At it's core, Watamote is a story about how everyone - the popular, the mean, the geeks, the doormats, the loners, the delinquents - are all cringy weirdos in their own right who all struggle to communicate and socialize "normally." The message at the heart of the series is that everybody faces these relatable struggles, and so nobody is alone in them. Watamote is, as it has always been, relatable. And that's beautiful.

[misscammiedawn]

In the 90s there was a widely spread anime trope of pairing up two women at work who were always together because work and one close with another because their careers had no momentum, they had no love life and no real relationships outside of one another.

Thusly they were lesbian coded.

To give some quick examples on a sliding scale of realism and severity Misato/Ritsuko in Evangelion, Nyamo/Yukari in Azumanga and Mihoshi/Kiyone in Tenchi.

Though honestly the trope was wide spread enough you could apply the dynamics to things like Rei and Usagi in Sailor Moon.

The core component is that one of them is a workaholic super serious person who tries really hard in matters of work and love and is in THE EXACT SAME POSITION as the other person who is a silly care little mess of a person likely to pass out drunk and need to be tucked in to bed by the serious and responsible one.

The thing I love about this trope is that the pairing works so well for yuri-coupling because through the sheer effort of being themselves the silly one is exposing the great lie of the world to the serious one.

Typically the silly one is actually good at their jobs. It's just not the only thing to their personality. They do not sacrifice their life, prospects and happiness to appease a system that does not care about them and act as living proof of their broken belief system that their partner has by living a fairly happy and carefree life while in the exact same "stuck in their career and love-life" issue.

No matter how much work the serious one does, Gendo will never respect Ritsuku or reciprocate her love. Nyamo will remain a single gym teacher and Kiyone will be a beat cop who gets no respect.

The lie of the world is exposed because the other person just chose to be happy. They aren't killing themselves for people and systems that will never ever give them the thing that they need and though Misato and Yukari are just as unhappy and hopeless as their counterparts, they know how to let their hair down. Even if they're a sloppy drunken mess at times. A manic pixie dream wife, so to speak.

It's through seeing the lie of capitalism and traditional family values exposed, that hard work and being a nice person are worthless virtues in a world that will exploit and never reward them, they begin admiring, respecting (and yes, loving) the other person and relying on them more and more.

I'm an old trans lady. Living proof of the lie of capitalism who wasted too many decades being the workaholic and doing the Right Thing for an uncaring society.

I can't help but adore that kind of ship. It's cheering on someone to break the social barriers and KISS THAT MESSY FOOL SLOPPY STYLE AND PAINT THE TOWN RED TOGETHER!

[harocat]

‘Fuck those anime twinks.’

Man shut the fuck up; those anime twinks crashed tumblr and other major websites multiple times, those anime twinks had an influence on queer media that is still felt to this day, those anime twinks bust through a niche sub genre to almost mainstream, with thousands of people who had never even watched anime becoming invested, those anime twinks changed lives and helped so many burgeoning queer people come to head with their identities like you have no idea, those anime twinks were the third best selling anime of the century despite being a passion project that wasn’t expected to be a hit at all, those anime twinks were written and directed by two women who spent years shopping around their idea, refusing to compromise and fighting censorship even though not doing so would have made getting their project out there so much easier.

Those anime twinks were in the OLYMPICS.

Those anime twinks have only twelve episodes, about four and a half hours total, but have still managed to be among the most beloved ships out there.

They’re also legitimately well written, compelling, and for a lot of people, one of the few patches of joy we had during that autumn of 2016.

In the words of Zac Bertschy (rip):

Surely you must be sick of hearing about how great this show is by now. I agree with all that stuff, and you've read it a few times now, so instead I'll tell you what the show meant to me personally.

Victor and Yuri kiss, and the entire world celebrates – the crowd goes wild, people can't believe it. Not because it's two dudes - we're not having a collective aneurysm because two men are kissing and that's either enraging or an enormous turn-on. People go nuts because – solely because - their love is dramatic and touching and everyone is rooting for them, because they seem like they belong together and their story is pretty incredible. None of that other shit matters – nobody cares. It's just two people in love. Paradise. I married my husband in October – thousands of couples like us got married this year. Our stories aren't as incredible as Victor and Yuri's, and I doubt many of us are ice skaters but let me tell you, it was real nice having a story like this to watch. Real nice.

[gotouhitori]

Okay, so. I'm in Love with the Villainess. Watashi no Oshi wa Akuyaku Reijou. WataOshi. Whichever title you want to refer to it by.

Before reading or watching it, I wondered why the hell people were holding up this random villainess isekai light novel with an over-the-top masochist main character as a landmark yuri title. Okay sure I don't doubt there's yuri going on, but how can it be so special?

Then I watched the anime. "Huh. The series and its main character are clearly and unambiguously lesbian in a way that so many other series can't bring themselves to be. And it has the most frank discussion of queer issues I think I've ever seen in anime or related media. Yeah, I think I see now, it is a cut above." And both because I've heard the novels get into a few things a little more and because the series now has its hooks in me enough for me to want to read the novels anyway, I read the first novel. And yeah, that does add a bit.

And then I read the second novel. The latter bit of the anime does cover the first bit of the second novel, but it's mostly new territory for an anime-only or anime-first such as myself. And holy fucking shit. Spoilers under the cut.

For one thing, the anime/first novel dropped some trans hints about Yu, and that turns out to be a whole transfem allegory - which isn't unheard of by any means, but it's not especially common in a work where that isn't the main focus. And not only that, but there's an actually explicitly textual transmasc in Rae's past life, who forms part of Rae's motivation to make considerable effort and take considerable risk (up to and including treason) to make sure Yu can live as a girl - once Yu states that is what she wants, it is important to note. Random yuri villainess isekai light novel says trans rights, and will absolutely stand by it.

And then all of the stuff about class and inequality comes to a head, and remember how the game that Rae's in the world of is titled "Revolution"? Yeah. One of those happens. Various hints have been dropped about what happens, largely centred on Rae making efforts to save Claire's neck in the most literal way possible when things really go down. But holy shit does that turn out to be more effort and a much more complex endeavour than it appears at first... or for most of the time while it's going on, for that matter. Ultimately she arranges things so that while the revolution still happens (it is basically inevitable), overall loss of life and suffering is minimised, and the general situation is as good as it possibly could be. By the time the proverbial smoke clears, Rae and Claire are openly living as a couple, which is a lot more than you usually see - one of the things Rae comments on is how in per previous life, too much of the yuri she read ended with at least one of the girls either dead or winding up with a man, which annoyed her enough to write fanfic based on series she likes with unsatisfying endings to fix that. And though the game did have a yuri spinoff, the original - the events of which she was living through and manipulating - was het. The character she winds up with was never supposed to be a romanceable character to begin with.

And that's just the first two of the five novels. Living through and changing the course of an actual revolution and settling down with her partner is just 40% of the whole story. (And less if more novels get published.) I've just started the third novel, and it's certainly looking like the rest is going to be at least as much of a ride as the first two were.

This really is an outstanding series. It's Dungeon Meshi levels of "I cannot stop thinking about it" to me, which if you've seen how much I post about that, says a lot. And I haven't read even half of it yet.

[orchidyoonkook]

To What We Were Before, And All The Things After | JJK | Ch. 4

Title: Sunday Nights and Lost Memories

Pairing: Prince!College Student!JK x Fine Arts Major!(F)!Reader

Series Rating//Genre: (M) | College AU, Mild Royalty AU, Smut, Angst, Fluff, S2F2L, Indiffernce to lovers, sloooowwww ass burn

Summary: Yuri’s mad at you, you agreed to be friends with the prince and now it’s...movie night?

Warnings: PG18, fluff, swearing, touch of angst, banter, lots of texting!!, nothing too drastic, just them <3, mentions of nudes, reader eats cheese - up to you whether or not it's dairy cheese or not, same goes for the meat. I didn't specify if it's veg or animal based | * there is a part where JK lifts reader. For all you readers out there,  big, little, small, tall, cute, beautiful, handsome, adorable, wonderful, perfect the way you are readers. I say my JK can lift you, okay? He’s strong and able enough to because I say so *

Word Count: 9062

Release Date: May 19, 2023, 8:00pm

A/N 1: she’s heeeereeee

Series: Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three

Three weeks.

Yuri’d given you the cold shoulder for the better part of three weeks.

And you’d let her, more impressed than anything she stuck to it. She’d never been mad at you for that long before and it made for a few awkward encounters—but it’s nothing you wouldn’t survive knowing what was coming.

Jungkook telling her to back off.

He’d asked you a few times, about ways to create some boundaries with her. Light ones, like not always walking with her on his arm or not discussing very personal topics such as grooming habits.  

But no matter what you suggested, no matter what he tried or said, Yuri was always somehow able to make it into something else.

Every new ‘boundary’ of his became a way for him to keep her closer instead of pushing her away.

Not walking on his arm was his way of letting her keep her independence. Not discussing grooming habits was his way of keeping the spark and mystery alive.

You don’t know how she did it. How she kept doing it to herself, finding ways to spin things in her favour, completely ignoring the rationality and reality of the situation.

Therefore, you decided that it was just going to have to be a hard lesson she’d learn in time. 

And in time did she ever.

When Jungkook finally did tell her outright, it was a last resort made after his several attempts at trying to convince her of their strictly platonic friendship, of trying to enforce his boundaries and be gentlemanly about the situation. 

It wasn’t the first time something like this had happened, so he wasn’t unfamiliar with this kind of behaviour from women.

But much to his regret, he was only able to tell her after she tried to kiss him. 

One afternoon, they were sitting on a bench in one of the school's lesser traveled courtyards, a respectable distance apart from one another, sipping on coffee he’d offered to pay for. 

He kept buying her coffees, kept occasionally complimenting her outfits, he was kind to her, and communicated his needs in their ‘relationship.’ 

It was the final nail in the coffin for her. 

She’d been debating it for a while, wondering if she should make the first move or wait until he did, but she wasn’t completely sure he felt the same. 

So, Yuri’d taken this final declaration of affection as the confirmation she needed, and leaned in. 

Meanwhile, Jungkook didn’t think much of treating her. It had always been his way of saying thank you for all the help around campus. In fact he’d done it more than once, really hoping she could see how grateful he was to her. 

She’d shown him the best places to eat and study in their building, showed him the fastest routes to his classes and the ones that would offer him the most privacy for him. 

She introduced you to him. 

He was grateful to her. 

But then he saw her eyes closing, and puckered lips moving closer and closer and closer and—in a not very princely, but very Jungkook way—panicked. 

He caught her shoulder with a hand to stop her advance and hoped that while doing so he was somehow wondrously mistaken and he was saving her from fainting or falling or literally anything else.

However, reality quickly derailed the nice thought.

It took a second for Yuri to register the hold was meant to halt rather than control, and opened her eyes, mortified.

No. 

Worse. So much worse. 

Horribly, stomach dropping, gut twisting, face heating, all-encompassingly embarrassing.

She just tried to kiss the prince. 

She just tried to kiss the prince??!!

And he stopped her. Almost pushed her away because he was so against the idea. 

She tried to kis—

Oh no. 

Oh no no no. 

No no no! 

Fuck! 

What the hell is wrong with her?! Why was she so stupid? She should have just listened to you. 

Why didn’t she listen to you!!??

Jungkook felt horrible for Yuri as he watched her process her emotions. Felt angry with himself. 

Horrible to have caused this and angry that he was unable to be honest with her about how he felt from the get go and save them both from this situation.

But he didn’t. And now he has to. 

And she looks like she wants to be half way across campus right boss.

So Jungkook, as kindly as he could, informed Yuri that while he was incredibly thankful for all of her help with everything over the past month, he didn’t feel the same way she did. And that he was very sorry if he’d ever done anything to make her think he did. He truly didn’t mean to, and apologized again that the boundaries he tried to set weren’t clear enough to signal that to her.

And from the water that began to swim over her irises to her hands that shook as he spoke, he could see it went over about as well as he expected.

Meanwhile, Yuri’d never left a situation so quickly in her life.

Jacket thrown over an arm, half open purse hastily grabbed, Yuri’d scrambled to be literally anywhere that he wasn’t. The held back tears freeing themselves from the confines of her lashes as she went.

The second she was out of his sight you received a heads up text, informing that a very distraught Yuri was most likely on her way to you, to please be gentle with her, and that he was extremely sorry to have caused this.

Not two minutes later did a mascara stained Yuri burst through your shared door apologizing for being so stupid. Rambling on about how you were right and he didn’t want her. That she read all of his signs wrong and frantic over the thought that her dreams of their future were crushed.

You held her as she cried her heart out, verbally bashing the prince for ‘being an asshole’ and ‘leading her on.’ Allowing her to process and get all of her feelings out.

He didn’t lead her on and you knew that. And you’re pretty sure she knew it too. But you weren’t going to call her on it. Instead, you agreed with every word she said and offered up a few choice ones of your own. In particular, ‘that asshole doesn’t know what he had.’

Your comfort seemed to make her feel better and you were glad because wanted to support her. To let her know she could always come back to you no matter what. That friends are forever even if there are bumps in the road, and you’ll always be there for her.

She made a promise that night to never let a guy come between you two ever again.

That was a month ago, and little to her knowledge, your friendship with Jungkook is flourishing with every passing week.

After having a mini meltdown about the realization of what you agreed to, you rationalized, and decided you didn’t think saying yes would really amount to much. Fully expecting him to text you maybe once a week about something school related or send you funny pictures on social media every now and then—not that you followed one another.

But it hasn’t been anything like that at all.

He messages you everyday.

At first it was just random things, like a picture of a rabbit nibbling on some grass by the greenhouse one morning.

PJK [6:23am]: *see attached: 1 image* PJK [6:23am]: I’m gonna name him floppy, I’ve seen him out here like 3 times now

You don’t reply until your morning alarm goes off at 6:45am, finding the messages when you go to snooze it.

Eyes still heavy with sleep and half closed, you type out your reply.

You [6:45am]: Junfgkook itsnot eben sevem in teh morninf, what thefcuk are yiu doing up, let alione out

Jungkook snorts at your text.

PJK [6:47am]: okay so clearly someonnneees definitely not a morning person, Miss Typos. PJK [6:48am]: But to answer your question: morning workout followed by homework. I prefer to get both out of the way before the day starts. PJK [6:48am]: Plus I like the greenhouse in the morning, it opens early so I get breakfast and a nice view while getting to work in peace

You scoff with a quirked smile. 

Of course.

You [6:50am]: Camt realte, I’ll be a mornig pesron once im outof bed, its teh period of time betwenn nowanf then taht im not

And that’s true. Once you’re up, you’re up. No caffeine or food needed. Your brain goes  “up now? Okay.” But that little period of time between waking up and getting out of bed?

You’re a zombie.

Jungkook laughs to himself at your butchered words, sitting in his newly decided seat outside the cafe—the one next to yours—before replying.

PJK [6:51am]: noted. don’t message YN before 7am or fear her wrath

You drag a pillow over your head, groaning. Guess you’re ‘up’ now.

You [6:53am]: damn straight You [6:54am]: the bunny’s cute tho You [6:54am]: hi floppy

That’s how you learned that he’s a morning person.

Random texts aside?

Jungkook’s also genuinely trying to get to know you while letting you learn about him too, and you really weren’t expecting just how… normal he is.

PJK [4:28pm]: What’s your favourite drink?

You [4:30pm]: Like alcohol wise or in general? Cuz if in general its a 3 way tie between OJ, apple juice and fruit punch, but if it’s alcohol? You [4:31pm]: I like wine I guess, the fruity kind. Dont really care what brand, but I also dont drink all that often so make of that what you will

PJK [4:32pm]: I meant in general but I’ll take that answer too. Mines milk or beer PJK [4:33pm]: wine’s delicious though. And a 3way tie between juices? I worry for your sugar intake

You [4:34pm]: haha. my sugar intake’s just fine thanks

PJK [4:35pm]: lol.

A weird quirk of yours is that you never use ‘lol’. Something deep inside you just hates it, maybe because of how overused it is. You’ve always used a version of ‘haha’ or ‘hehe’ or one of the various laughing emoticons. But naturally, when he found out about this little aversion, Jungkook seemed to use it more and more around you just to get a rise.

PJK [4:35pm]: whatever you say, Rembrandt

A smile finds your lips at that.

You don’t know how it started really, but sometime between that Monday in September and now, halfway through October, Jungkook started to refer to you almost exclusively by a number of old artist themed nicknames.

And they have, so far, never once been repeated. You're starting to wonder if he searches up new ones because of how many he’s donned you without duplication.

Ding.

PJK [4:49pm]: what are we feeling for Sunday? Action? Thriller? Mystery? What’s on the menu? Is there a dress code?

Another tradition that’s somehow worked its way into your life; Sunday movie nights at Jungkook’s.

He lives in a single dorm so you never have to worry about prying eyes or noisy roommates. Plus he always has the best snacks so you can never say no.

And, well…You love them.  

You love having dedicated time to relaxing and being social in an environment where you feel safe and not overwhelmed. Where you feel comfortable getting out of your academic head for a few hours with someone you’re learning to trust and know, whose company you genuinely enjoy.

They’re something you didn’t know you needed so badly until they became routine. Three to five hours a week of nothing but relaxing and fun. A break from the chaos your life has always been.

No painting or drawing or studying or catching up on anything you’re behind on. No preparing yourself for the next day's lessons or keeping up with your practice schedule.

Just a few blissful hours of complete peaceful nothing where your brain can turn to mush before coming back stronger than before. Like a caterpillar needs to do in order to become a butterfly.

You tell Yuri you’re doing individual studies in the school during them. And in true Yuri fashion, says; “Only crazy people study all night before the week starts up again, but you do you Sweets,” or something along those lines every time.

She knows not to get in your way when it comes to your academics, and does her best to support you from afar.

It makes the night that much sweeter knowing you won’t be interrupted.

But right now, it’s barely Wednesday evening. You haven’t thought that far ahead yet. And for good reason.

You [4:55pm]: all I ask is a comfy dress code please, like PJ level comfy and no horror movies. I’m going to be so dead this weekend. Expect no makeup and minimal effort

You have an early mid-term on Friday, and already know you’re going to be so wiped for the days following. Your study habits aren’t exactly healthy, but they work, and that’s all you care about.

Who needs sleep or food when you’re top of your class and have a scholarship to keep from the top university in the nation?

PJK [4:57pm]: so what I’m hearing is I get free reign over choice of movie and snacks as long as I follow the two requests of casual wear and nothing scary?

You [4:59pm]: well considering that you always eat 90% of the snacks and whine until we settle on a movie you like then talk through anyways? You [4:59pm]: sure

He ignores your playful jab, and instead tries out one of his own. To see if you’ll budge.

He’s been testing the limits of your humor lately, to see if yours and his match up at all.

PJK [5:01pm]: But what if I sleep naked and have no Pj’s? Hmmm?? What would you do then???

You [5:01pm] take pictures and sell them to the highest bidder. You [5:02pm] How much do you think I could get for leaking the first pictures of the prince's dick to the public?

You think twice after sending that message, maybe a bit too bold.

But he takes it in stride, is a little proud even.

Not many would speak to him that bluntly, especially not with a ‘threat’.  It seems your senses of humor line up quite well.

PJK [5:02pm]: ok damn. I have PJ’s, no need to go there so quickly.  lol PJK [5:03pm]: i don’t need my dick on the cover of every news outlet thanks. my dad would literally kill me

It makes you snort how he refers to the king as his dad. Because on one hand, yeah. But on the other, it seems like such a mundane title for the most powerful man within 5000 miles in any direction. The monarch. The one who can command armies with the flick of an eyebrow or quirk of the finger.

You [5:03pm]: you literally asked for it.

Also, how in the fuck did you manage to get yourself into talking about the princes dick? That’s definitely not a safe topic by any means.

And yet… it didn’t stop you from doing so.

Stupid brain always needing to win.

PJK [5:04pm]: yeah… guess I did. Allow me to make up for it: PJK [5:04pm]: you can ask for one snack and I will guarantee its presence on Sunday

You [5:05pm]: ahhhh. i love your princely power sometimes. being able to ~guarantee~ me anything my heart desires. You [5:05pm]: A true friend indeed.

Jungkook laughs at that.

You [5:07pm]: blue raspberry sour drops, the small ones

PJK [5:09pm]: done. PJK [5:09pm]: see you at mine then? with Pj’s on, of course.

You [5:10pm]: yeah, sounds good

But you add in, simply because you cannot help but drive the point home.

You [5:10pm]: and shame, I was really looking forward to the payday your nudes could get me. multiple zeros, meet my bank account

He doesn’t deign you with a response, but you know he saw the joke in your words.

He always does.

You put your phone down to get back to studying, but a memory of Yuri saying she was going out Sunday night pops into your head. Something about a duke asking her out but he was only able to go out on a Sunday night due to his schedule.

She, being Yuri, obviously jumped at the chance, thrilled to put the embarrassment of the Jungkook incident far, far, far behind her.

“And don’t wait up for me, I don’t plan on coming home until the morning,” she told you with a wink.

You held up your hand, and she smacked it.

“Go get’em tiger,” you encouraged in what you hoped was your most suave voice. But you cracked a giant grin before you could finish and you both broke out laughing.

With that thought in mind, you grab your phone again.

You [5:15pm]: oh wait actually You [5:15pm]: up to you, but Yuri’s gunna be gone Sunday night if you wanna finally check out casa de Rembrandt You [5:16pm]: seeing as you’ve been asking for literally forever

More like two weeks, but what’s the point of being accurate when you can be dramatic. Plus, it would be safe with no Yuri. You were on the first floor, quick and easy to get to without anyone seeing.

You [5:17pm]: gotta come in incognito mode tho, cant have that famous mug of yours filling up my security cameras

You don’t want to even imagine what would happen if security found out that the prince was entering the girls dorm.

Front page news on every gossip magazine to start.

Maybe you shouldn’t hav—Ding.

PJK [5:20pm]: absolutely 100% yes. I’ve been dying to raid your fridge of all things boring and unhealthy. I swear your diet only consists of bread, hot chocolate, cheese and egg tarts. PJK [5:20pm} And juice. Way too much juice.

You [5:21pm]: hey you leave my juice out of this Jeon. Not everyone can have a personal chef and nutritionist 😅

You don’t know that Jungkook doesn’t have either of those. That he cooks everything he eats himself.

Hey—Everyone’s gotta have hobbies. And half his friends back home are the sons of palace chefs.

You learn things when you hang out in kitchen’s all day.

PJK [5:22pm]: no one should be able to survive off of what you do, so I’ll go after your insane juice habits if I want to PJK [5:22pm]: lol

You roll your eyes. This isn’t the first, nor will it be the last time he’s going to bug you about this. 

You [5:23pm]: Thin ice, Jeon. Thin fucking ice. You [5:23pm]:  In fact, I think the only thing that will thicken it again is the addition of chocolate at movie night on your dime

PJK [5:24pm]: we’ll see about that, Cézanne. We’ll see.

Friday comes and goes way too quickly, and you were right. Your study habits are insane—but they always pay off. You knew every single answer on your mid-term and have no doubt you’ll pass with flying colours.

And just like you were right about that you were also right about being totally wiped for the following days. All that build up had to come crashing down at some point.

It’s finally Sunday evening and Yuri’s about to leave for her date, currently busy applying mascara in your shared washroom.

She already knows you’re going to skip your regularly scheduled “Sunday night study session” in favour of a night in with your bed, a movie and junkfood.

Not a lie, you tell yourself, just not the whole truth.

Not a lie, not a lie, not a lie.

“I’m glad you're finally listening to your body and resting, Sweets. Gods know you work too hard in the first place,” she says, sliding the mascara wand back into the tube and doing final checks in the mirror. “A night in will do you some good. You look exhausted.”

She’s wearing a tight little black dress and matching heels with red bottoms. Her hair’s up in an intentionally messy updo, with a smokey eye, and a lipstick that matches the soles of her shoes perfectly.

In short, she looks hot.

“I feel exhausted,” you admit, leaning against the dining room table. You’re wearing a tank and pj pants paired with your favourite bunny slippers. “But I aced that exam soooo… worth it. You have fun though! And go get that dick yeah? Let me live vicariously through you, considering mine lives on the other side of the planet right now.”

The sad smile she begins to give you gets replaced by a wider, much more mischievous one, “I’ll be sure to fill you in on every detail. I need to know your opinions, you’re clearly better at this whole thing—five year relationship still going strong and all. I need to know if this one’s a keeper.”

“First opinion: if he can’t find the clit, dump him.”

She gives you a look. “That one’s obvious, YN. I’m not completely hopeless.”

You plaster your face with her mischievous grin from earlier and mutter, “could’ve fooled me,”  under your breath.

You’re met with a towel to the face as you laugh. Removing it from its current rental space on your face, you place it on the back of a chair and continue to mock, eyes catching on the clock in your room while doing so.

“Aren’t you going to be late? It’s like 6:15.”

“Shit! Yes. Thank you,” she says, grabbing her handbag off the door handle and stuffing it with makeup and condoms. She knows better than to trust the guy to have them.

Shuffling out, she takes her jacket off the coat hooks by the door and puts it on.

“Okay byeeeeeee, don’t wait up, I’ll see you tomorrow afternoon and let you in on all things dirty!”

You wave goodbye. “I’m looking forward to it, be safe!”

“Always am,” she says as she closes the door, and you go back to your room once it clicks shut.

You’d spent the afternoon tidying, not that you were messy, but you were raised to clean before company came over because apparently you can’t have people knowing you actually live in your place of residence. 

Stupid made up rule. But it’s ingrained into you at this point.

Plopping down on your bed, you scroll through your phone waiting on a text from Jungkook to signal his arrival. But before one ever comes, a knock sounds at your door.

It’s probably Yuri. She forgets her keys all the time and no matter how much you hound her for it, the problem never seems to resolve.

Getting up, you don’t hold back your scolding, “Yuri how many times have I told you to just keep your damn keys in your ba—oh,” shock cutting you off as you open the door.

Jungkook’s standing in your entryway wearing flannel PJ pants and white tee under his normal hat, mask and jacket combo.

He looks so completely different to what you’re used to seeing on TV, in magazines and on campus.

No formal wear or designer labels. Just a loose shift and brandless pants.

So normal. Like anyone else.

You think you’d be used to it after a month and half. But you’re still slightly jarred every time you see him so ordinarily dressed.

And as much as you practice what you preach about not giving a shit about his social status, there’s always that underlying expectation of what and how a prince is supposed to look. Regal, royal, not like an entirely regular university student.

He looks comfortable, and his arms are full of plastic bags that likely hold the snacks he promised for tonight.

And while you’re taking him in, you don’t see him staring at you, unable to speak.

He’s looking at you, at your cute shirt and pants, at the most adorable pair of slippers he’s ever seen. But also at your nervous expression, and how tired you seem.

You break the silence, moving past him to peek down the hallway.

“Hey, I thought you were going to text me you were here so I could come get you. Did Yuri see you? She just left,” you ramble, happy to see it’s empty before moving out of the way to let him in.

“Nice pajamas,” is all he manages.

You look down at his compliment, eyeing your slippers. Yikes… That's only slightly embarrassing. “Uh… thanks.”

Your confusion snaps him out of his daze.

“I saw Yuri on my way in, but she didn’t recognize me, don’t worry.”

“Oh that’s good. No text though? You didn’t get lost trying to get here?”

“Hands were full,” he says, lifting his arms. “Plus you’re on the first floor and your building isn’t that hard to navigate. It has signs and I have eyes. I worked it out.”

Closing the door, you turn to help with the bags but immediately pause.

Oh.

You didn’t think prior to his arrival about just how much space he was going to take up in your dorm.

Jungkook’s place is bigger than yours, it feels comfortably large. Has more than enough room to go around.

And your dorm isn’t tiny by any means—when it’s just you and Yuri.

It has two bedrooms, a bathroom, a small kitchenette, a dining room. Lots of room for you two.

But Jungkook, he’s…very large. He takes up a lot of space you aren’t used to having filled.

And you know that, you have to remind yourself. You know he’s taller than you by a good couple inches and that he works out regularly.

You know he isn’t small by any definition of the word.

So why does it still bring such a surprise to have him take up so much of your space.

Gulp.

“Eyes and signs are convenient like that I guess,” you respond dumbly, looking to your room where movie night will be held.

It’s even smaller than the dining space.

You really really didn’t think this through.

“Where can I put these?” he asks, holding up his bag clad arms.

“In there,” you gesture to the room that’s starting to leech the air from your lungs despite the fact you aren’t even occupying it yet.

Jungkook takes his shoes off by the door and heads to your room. He has to turn sideways to get through your door with all of his bags.

“Did you have to buy the whole store?”

“Yes.”

You scoff but follow. He steps between the two bean bag chairs at the side of the bed, and firstly sets the bags down on the floor in front of them before secondly shedding himself of his disguise, leaving the mask and hat on your desk, his jacket on the neatly tucked in desk chair.

And with its removal, tattoos you’re not used to seeing are now on full display as what you thought was a t-shirt is actually a muscle shirt.

His forearm and bicep are covered, the ink continuing to crawl up and over his shoulder and under his shirt.

There’s barely a patch of untouched skin left.

And you try not to stare. You really do, even though all you want to do is stare. Up close. Too close. For hours.

You want to study every line and bit of shading. Every colour gradient and scrawl of text. Every design and hidden meaning.

Damn your love of art.

Reaching into the discarded bags, he pulls out three bags of chips, far too many drinks, two packs of candy—one of which is a massive pack of blue raspberry sour drops—two chocolate bars, and to your surprise, some fruit and vegetable trays and a charcuterie board.

You raise an eyebrow at those last three as your movie nights have almost always exclusively had shitty junk food. Jungkook notices your quizzical expression instantly.

He’s been noticing a lot about you lately.

“Gotta make sure you eat more than junk, your body needs healthy foods too you know.”

“I see cheese, so I am content.”

“Michelangelo, I swear to god if all you eat is the candy, chocolate and cheese I will hire you a personal chef to make sure you eat better. And yes that is a threat.”

He’s setting everything out on your twin bed so you’re both able to reach back to grab what you want, pointing as he lists, “There’s strawberries, tangerine slices, grapes, peaches, bean sprouts, carrots, cucumbers, radish, sesame dip, seaweed, kimchi, meat and crackers here on top of the cheese and junk food. All pre-made and ready to go. So you better shove them in your mouth and thank me later.”

You raise your hands in defeat. He wasn’t mean or rude in his tone, clearly just passionate about healthy eating. And since it’s all here and free and will make him happy, who are you to deny him?

Though that doesn’t mean you’ll accept without giving him a hard time about it.

“Alright, alright your majesty, I concede, your wish is my command.”

He gives you a look you wholly ignore as you head to the computer you have set up on a little stand in front of the bean bag chairs. Not nearly as nice as the couch and flatscreen at Jungkook's place, but he doesn’t seem to mind in the slightest.

“What am I cuing up?”

He tells you the movie he’s selected for the night, and you’re not surprised. It’s an action thriller, something with car chases and explosions. You’re too tired to argue, so you don’t, instead clicking into your streaming app and loading the movie.

“Plates?” he asks, not paying attention to if you're listening or not, still busy setting the food up.

Yeah, you guess plates could be useful. And maybe cups too.

By the time you return from the kitchen with two plates, two bowls, some cutlery and cups, Jungkook’s already settled into the chair on the right; himself and the food ready to go.

Flicking the lights off on the way to your seat, you give him his share of dishes, and both of you fill them as much as you can.

Yours is stacked with a bit of everything, to which Jungkook gives a nod that you know means ‘good.’

A single butterfly flaps its wings in your stomach.

Leaning forward, you hit the space button to play, and grab a bite of cured meat with a cracker and cheese.

—Oh! Wait, that's actually really yummy. 

Munching away, you credit him for making it past the title sequence before starting to talk. It’s further than you usually get.

“How was your exam?” he asks, mouth half full of chips but that never seems to stop him.

For someone raised in a palace you thought he’d have more manners drilled into him.

You don’t mind though, when he was like this it was easier to forget he was the second most important person on the continent.

“Great,” you answer, another small piece of cheese making its way to your belly. “Nailed it actually, just waiting on the professor to confirm.”

Jungkook’s subtly watching you eat from the corner of his eye while you pretend to focus on the movie. You haven't touched any of the fruit or vegetables on your plate. Slightly perturbed, he replies, “That’s great Botticelli, you’ll have to teach me your study methods one day. It’s getting harder and harder to keep up.”

“You couldn’t handle my methods,” you joke. But if you really thought about it, he was probably one of the only people that could.

You can’t imagine the pressure and discipline he put on himself growing up, let alone what his father put from the little he’s told you about him.

“You know, I think you’re right,” he says, still observing because most of the cheese and chocolate are gone while the healthy foods remain untouched.

—But that’s because you liked eating cheese and chocolate together! They complement one another on your palette. You’ll get to the fruits and vegetables… eventually.

He continues, “But it was worth a shot.”

You hum, finishing your mouthful of cheesy-chocolatey goodness, and go to grab another, but he picks up a baby carrot from his plate and places it at your lips.

Your eyebrows knit together in confusion.

“Open,” he says firmly.

Jungkook really wasn’t kidding with all the healthy food talk, or maybe he just doesn’t want his money to go to waste. It isn’t like you weren’t going to eat it.

But you do as instructed, teeth gently taking the carrot from his fingers. A very satisfying crunch sounding from your bite.

His eyes linger for a second before going back to watching the movie, as if he didn’t just feed you.

There’s a feeling in your stomach you don’t want to recognize, so you push it down, and decide not to unintentionally provoke him again by beginning to eat the healthy foods on your plate. Abandoning the rest of your cheese, chocolate and blue raspberry drops.

For now.

Your phone dings from its place on your thigh, a notification from Nel popping up.

Nelly <3 [7:10pm]: hey babe, just got my ticket. I’ll see you in a few 😘

A smile plasters its way to your face immediately, cheeks almost hurting from how wide.

Nel comes over every fall reading week. You look forward to it every single year.

You [7:11pm]: I’ll see you in a few Smoosh, I love you❤️

Nelly <3 [7:11pm]: love you too x Nelly <3 [7:12pm]: what’re you up too?

You [7:15pm]: movie night with snacks

Not a lie. Not a lie. Not a lie.

Nelly <3 [7:15pm]: Yuri with you?

You [7:16pm]: nope, she’s on a date

Nelly <3 [7:16pm]: ah, hope that goes well for her Nelly <3 [7:16pm]: I won’t bug anymore though. enjoy your movie

You [7:17pm]: thanks baby, I will ❤️

It only burns a little bit to omit the fact that you have another man in your room. That while no, Yuri isn’t with you, someone else is. Not that you aren’t allowed to have guy friends, half your friends back home are, and Nel doesn’t care, he trusts you.

Also, it’s not like anything will ever happen. You two are friends and you’re quite content in your relationship.

It just feels a little too much like lying—But it’s not.

And keeping it a secret was your decision. You have to stick with it.

“Who beckons?” Jungkook asks, eyes on the screen. A car chase currently capturing his attention.

“Just Nel letting me know he got his ticket for fall break,” a strawberry meets  your tongue, mmm. “I’m so excited to have him for a whole eight days.”

It’d taken you a minute to tell Jungkook about Nel, primarily because the topic never really came up and because you thought going “Oh by the way I have a boyfriend” randomly might’ve made Jungkook think you thought he was trying to flirt or get with you, even though you knew that wasn’t the case. It was just an awkward situation you didn’t know how to properly approach.

But conveniently, just as he got your number in the first place, Jungkook saw ‘Nelly <3’ pop up on your phone screen one day while you were at the greenhouse.

“Hey, YN, you have a text from a ‘Nelly heart emoticon’?” He calls to you.

You were walking out of the cafe, hot chocolate with mini marshmallows in hand. “Oh, that’s Nel, well, Cornelius, but he hates his full name so I just call him Nel. He’s my boyfriend.”

You swear Jungkook stiffens at the word boyfriend, but it’s such a small change you can't tell if it actually happened or if you imagined it. You decide it was the latter as his reply is normal.

Well…normal for him at least.

“Boyfriend, hmmmm? Since when? You never told me about a boyfriend. Would I approve? Does he treat you well? He showers right? Some guys say they do and then wear too much cologne to cover up the fact that they don’t,” Jungkook’s leaning in now, like a detective conducting an interview. His only tell that he’s joking, a quirked lip. His eyes on the other hand…

You indulge him. “Since the end of 10th grade, I never told because you never asked, I think you two would get along actually, and yes he does. To both.”

Jungkook stares, squinting at—no—into you. Trying to decide if you’re lying about that last part. “Damn,” and you thought you detected a hint of defeat in his voice. But if there was, he recovered fast.

“That’s a long time, I’m glad you’re with someone who treats you well, and showers,” honing in on you again, he looks like he’s mentally deciding something, then nods. “Fine, you’re forgiven.”

“But I’m not sorry?”

“You’re still forgiven.”

Back in the present, Jungkook asks with wider eyes than normal, “Does that mean I won’t see or hear from you for a week?”

Jungkook isn’t leaving campus for fall break. His family will be in another country then—a regularly scheduled trip from the middle of October to the second week of November. This is the first year he won’t be going.

“Uhm.. yeah probably. I only get to see Nel in the summer, a day during Solstice break if I’m lucky, and fall reading week, so I try to maximize my time when I’m with him.”

You and Nel are both always too busy to do anything for the spring reading week because you’re trying to wrap up your school years. Nel is only able to come your way during the fall because he isn’t at his school on scholarship, and doesn’t rely on being a top student to be there. Though he’s still brilliant.

He’s studying architecture at the Eastern College of Architecture and Design and is proudly ranked somewhere in the middle to higher area of his class. 

Unfortunately, his program also requires him to stay longer during the Solstice break, so anytime he does have during it, he wants to spend with his family—which you understand. Solstice is important to your mother too, so it works out that you spend that time with her.

Therefore, summer and fall break are your favourite times of the year. Your Nel Time.

Long distance is hard, and you plan out this week with Nel in the summer to maximize every second you have with him.

Every single precious second.

“Oh… okay,” Jungkook looks back to the movie, focusing hard on the explosions. But pipes up again after a minute. “What about your study times? I thought you mentioned a while ago that you always study through breaks.”

“I do. We do. Nel studies with me, we go to the greenhouse cafe or the library or wherever. He understands that my education has to come first for now. He’s always said my dedication to my future was one of the first things that attracted him to me in the first place.”

You're smiling again, recalling the memory.

You and Nel met at an art show your high school put on; you displaying your paintings and him his architectural drawings. Barely sixteen and seventeen back then.

You were making the rounds, looking at all the other pieces submitted by students, when his drawings caught your eye.

They were of a very futuristic looking house that was built into the side of a mountain. It was made of glass, wood and a dark material you didn’t know the name of.

It was beautiful. You wanted to live somewhere like that someday.

He saw you staring and struck up a conversation, complimenting your work when he asked if you were in the gallery too and you pointed your section out to him.

That night he asked for your number, and here you were, five years later at twenty-one and twenty-two.

Nel being older by a year.

That was something else you’d noticed a while ago too; that you almost always had older guys around compared to younger.

You guessed something in you subconsciously preferred that. Not having the energy to deal with the hormone induced insanity younger guys tend to have. All of them more than happy to prove themselves the biggest asshole in the room.

Nor did you like the odors and cockiness that oozed from them. Jungkook had a point about guys showering habits.

Older guys always seemed more mature, not in a literal sense, you know most men are children when given the right topic. It was more of a they didn't care what people thought, they were more polite, knew what they wanted and what personal hygiene was.

Though once you were considered ‘one of the guys’ that last one changed really quickly. They just got better at hiding it. Again, Jungkook had a point.

But…well, Nel was older, and Hobi—one of your best friends from back home—was older by a few years too. Most if not all of your guy friends from school were, not one from your grade ever making their way into your social circle.

Even Jungkook’s older by three years. Having turned twenty four about a week before you met him.

The twenty four year old in question has the smallest pout when he asks, “Does that mean I can’t go to the greenhouse for a week?”

You’re quick to clarify. “No, you can do whatever you like. But if I see you, I’ll have to pretend I don’t know you. It’s easier for everyone that way.” You yawn, the repercussions of your actions from earlier in the week coming back in full force. You’re only a half hour or so into the movie. “I’m sorry.”

Jungkook is silent for a minute, in what you assume to be a processing moment. Then,

“When do I get you back?”

Odd phrasing, but you’re one of his only friends on campus, so it makes sense that not speaking or seeing you for a week may feel like you’re being ‘taken away.’

“Nel leaves the following Sunday night, so I’ll have to miss movie night twice—sorry again. Maybe you can use that freed up time for yourself and just relax? Midterms are coming up and you don’t want to burn yourself out. Or maybe you could ask some other friends over those nights?”

Jungkook doesn’t want to tell you he hasn't made any other friends yet. That even after almost two months, you‘re still the only person he’s met that treats him how he’d requested on his first day. The only person he enjoys being around.

Everyone else still looks at him and only sees opportunity for them.

Not him.

Nobody ever saw him.

He didn’t know that being out on his own for the first time would be so isolating. Lonely.

He’d gotten used to having people who were used to him being around them. Whether they were his security—who aren’t scared to make jokes at his expense, having seen him as a teenager and growing up—but they’re here to do a job, not hang out. Or the couple of servants kids he’d grown up with who he considers his true friends.

People he didn’t have to hide around. Wear the mask of ‘prince’ around.

But they were back home at the palace. He doesn’t have them here.

He’d been looking forward to university for almost five years, to have his first and last taste of freedom before signing his life away to kingdom and crown. And he isn’t upset with his experience so far, but at the same time, Jungkook feels like he’s missing out.

Making lifetime friends is supposed to be a part of the experience, isn't it?

He’d made a few predictions about how his university experience would go prior to actually being here. So far, the only things he’s gotten right was where his grades sat, his love for what he was studying and, regrettably, the fact that no one could get over the stupid word that’s been in front of his name since birth. The one that separates him from everyone else.

A small part of him foolishly hoped it wouldn't change anything.

But it did, because it always does, because everyone cares. Everyone wants something from him.

Everyone except you.

You don’t care that he’s The Prince. You call him on his shit, and threaten to send his fictional nudes to media outlets for a laugh. You let him borrow you for some of his homework assignments when he needs a model, and he tries to return the favour whenever you need one for a figure study.

You buy his coffee when you get to the cafe before him, even though he knows you know he doesn’t need you too. Even when he has all the money in the world, and you’re on a tight budget.

But you know his coffee order, and you are kind.

You’re kind to him because you want to be and not because you think it will get you something from him.

You’re kind because it is innate to you. Because you’re different from most people, unintentionally so. You’re not kind to gain recognition or to stand out.

You see the world around you and feel inspired to create beautiful things, both on and off the canvas.

In life and in feelings and friendships.

So you are the only one he’s befriended. And that’s been enough for him. 

You’re enough.

But you’re not his. You’re someone else’s.

Someone who was smart enough to get to you first.

He can’t have you. He’ll never come first.

“Yeah, maybe I’ll have a guys night,” he brushes off with a white lie. The first he’s ever told you. And a part of him hates himself for it.

He’s come to love movie night too. And to miss one, let alone two feels…wrong.

He likes having a tradition of his own making. One that doesn’t come from anything calendar related or of his family’s making. One that he doesn’t ever want to give up.

He likes spending that time with you.

You, snuggled up in too many blankets on his couch, or resting into the bean bag chairs on your floor, munching away and watching whatever movie. Talking about nothing and everything all night.

Laughing together. Joking together. Being present together and simply enjoying one another’s company.

But Jungkook understands that Nel comes first.

Jungkook understands that it would be selfish of him to expect you to spend some of your only time that you get with Nel, with him instead.

Because Nel is your boyfriend, and Jungkook is just your…friend.

“Thanks for understanding Jungkook.”

“Of course.”

Jungkook looks at you when the movie ends.

You’re sleeping.

Silently in your bean bag chair, your head leaning to the side, mouth open a little.

He doesn’t know when you fell asleep.

Conversation dwindled after your text from Nel, and he’d focused mostly on the movie after that to distract himself.

He sees your plate is empty of all foods, healthy and unhealthy alike, and a side-mouthed smile lifts his cheek.

You’d listened to him. 

For once.

You look so peaceful, like you’re dreaming.

He hopes it’s a good dream.

You warned him that your study habits before exams aren’t the healthiest but that they worked, and that you just needed a bit of recovery time afterward. He knew you were tired the second you opened the door in the cutest pajamas and bunny slippers he’s ever seen.

But there were dark circles under your eyes, and he could see your energy levels weren’t the same as they usually were.

That’s why he brought the fruit and vegetable trays and charcuterie board. He had a feeling you needed to get some real food into you to help with your current state. That it would bring some nourishment back into your body, help you feel better.  

And by the looks of the quiet, rhythmic breaths leaving you, they did their job. Your dark circles disappearing, cheeks regaining some colour.

He thinks about waking you for a second, before deciding against it. He doesn’t want to disturb you finally getting the rest you so clearly need.

Instead, he gets up from his seat and moves the remaining food to the ground, pulls the blankets of your bed back and gently slides his arms under your knees and back, lifting.

In your semi-unconscious state from being moved, you slide your arms around his neck and nuzzle your head into the junction where his shoulder meets his neck.

Jungkook’s heart thumps, and for reasons he doesn’t know and doesn’t want to uncover, stands just a second longer with you in his arms, as you clutch yourself to him. 

Your skin under his fingertips, and lips resting near his neck.

Warm.

He takes a small breath before placing you down on your bed with the utmost care, and tucking you in.

There’s a fleeting thought of lips meeting forehead, but it’s gone before it ever arrives.

Jungkook turns to shut down the computer, then plugs your phone into its charger on your night stand and gathers the leftover food and drinks. He brings them to your kitchen and puts them away neatly into your fridge.

While doing so he notices all of the juices on the shelf and has to hold back a laugh.

You really weren’t kidding.

Silently retrieving his hat, mask and jacket silently from your room, Jungkook’s mind is reeling as he takes one last look at your sleeping form, before slipping from your room and sliding his shoes on by the door.

He exits your building, entering into the cool night with three things unable to leave his mind.

1.  The feeling of your arms around his neck, holding tightly. Refusing to let go.

2. Your hair smells like apples. Sweet ones. The ones that the castle's orchard produces for his family only. Like a piece of home.

And,

3. That in order to save whatever this friendship you two have is, he’s going to have to listen to his father’s only advice before sending him off to university. A piece of advice he never intended on listening to, until now.

To save this before he ruined it.

“While you’re at that school you need to look for a future wife. You’re going to be 24 soon enough, and you’ll be 28 by the time that you finish. The Royal Academy has all of your generation's most eligible women. Find the best one, and pick her. She’d be a fool to say no.

“And If you want my opinion,” Jungkook doesn’t but he knows his father is going to tell him whether he wants to know or not, “There’s a girl there named Adaline Dupree, she’s twenty-one, from a well bred family, of high social standing, and beautiful. She’s been on my radar for potential matches for you since you were young.

“Start with her.”

Jungkook gulps, getting into the black sedan that’s waiting for him outside.

You wake up in your bed.

You wake up in your bed?      

How did you get in your bed? Weren’t you just—?

You look for your phone, and in your search see that the computer is closed, your phone is plugged in and that the food and Jungkook are gone.

Fuck.

Did you fall asleep during the movie? 

You can’t remember.

Fuck!

Morning light is slowly crawling up your walls like ivy, the sun just barely creeping over the horizon. And you jolt in panic.

It’s Monday. Did you set your alarms last night? How early is it?

Scrambling for your phone, you read 7:43am and exhale a dramatic breath.

Your first class isn’t till nine.

Heart rate decelerating, you fall back onto your pillow. You feel rested, like you got a full night's sleep and then some. Like you’re finally recovered from the hell you put yourself through to thrive academically.

That’s the fastest you’ve done that since highschool. Only two days?

What changed this time?

Pulling the blankets back over you, the question of ‘how did you get into your bed?’ returns.

Did you wake up by yourself at some point during the night and get yourself there? Did you stay awake for the movie and slither in after Jungkook left? Or did Jungkook have to wake you up to tell you he was leaving?

You cringe, hoping it isn’t that one.

And if it is, you’re glad you don’t remember.

But with that troubling thought and a yawn, you know you won’t be able to go back to sleep, so you yank your sheets off and walk to the bathroom to brush your teeth. You can feel with a run of your tongue over them that you forgot too last night, and you need to get all of yesterday's grime off.

Half way through brushing, you quickly check the fridge for your usual morning breakfast items, only to find all of last night's uneaten snacks inside. There’s still a decent amount of fruits and vegetables left, and you decide that instead of your usual toast, jam and juice, you would use the fruit and borrow a little bit of Yuri’s yogurt for your first meal of the day. Considering it a consultation fee for the inevitable conversation about the duke later, where you will most definitely be asked for your opinion on many things.

After a return to the bathroom to spit and wash, you make a mental note to thank Jungkook for the brain food. You’re going to need it.

You [7:54am]: thanks You [7:55am]: for the food. You [7:55am]: It helped

Chapter 5: Shocking Announcements and Camouflaged Expectations

A/N 2: Thanks for waiting for her <3

<- Back

[vexieeeee]

My fav yuri couples / ships <3

(In no particular order)

No one asked for it but I'm bored and wanna do it, you guys can give me ideas for lists to talk about like that in the future too.

Gonna make more parts too <3

Rae and Claire (I'm in Love with the Villainess) (Canon)

My thoughts: Okay so I absolutely adore everything about this series like manga and anime and light novels are all so good <3 It even defeated my ultimate yuri series which is Bloom Into You and that's something. So of course Rae and Claire with their amazing and such an interesting relationship had to make a list here. I don't know why but something about them just fills me with warmth. The way Claire goes from absolutely not being able to stand Rae to falling in love completely is just so 🤌 Dare I say my fav yuri relationship 💖

Sorawo and Toriko (Urasekai Picnic) (Canon)

My thoughts: With my last posts no one should be surprised at the next pair because COME ON GUYS, they're the lesbians we need but never deserved fr... I love everything about them, girlfriends who are accomplices and explore a world with monsters and other fucked up shit while being absolutely gay and protective of each other. I adore them <3

Yuu and Touko (Bloom Into You) (Canon)

My thoughts: My first ever fav yuri (Can't believe Rae and Claire beat them though-) for a reason. Everything about this was perfect for me, characters, plot and just the writing in general. Yuu and Touko's relationship with each other kept me entertained for the whole anime and then manga. I don't know what to say except that I love them <3

Adachi and Shimamura (Adachi to Shimamura) (Canon)

My thoughts: THEM. I just think they're so cute and that's all. And I know a lot of people are gonna come and say "Omg Vex Shimamura doesn't care about Adachi like that, she's such an annoying person-" Shut up because I do not tolerate Shimamura slander on this blog. Girl went through a lot but she cares about and loves Adachi. "The end of her life was the end of mine" bitch stop I'm sobbing, if that ain't love then I don't know what is.

Mitsuki and Aya (The Guy She Was Interested in Wasn't a Guy at All) (Canon)

My thoughts: Obviously I HAD TO add my green lesbians here. Mitsuki and Aya are the syrup to my pancakes and I'm so serious. Don't you guys just love it when two girls bond over shared interests and fall in love? Yeah me too 🙂‍↕️ If you need some serotonin then just read it, trust me guys.

Himari and Yori (Whisper Me a Love Song) (Canon)

My thoughts: Himari and Yori are so 💖 I've been reading this manga since it first came out in 2019 and my feelings towards them never change. In every chapter they're just so cute and their relationship is just adorable and I just love them <3

Aki and Shiho (Whisper Me a Love Song) (Canon)

My thoughts: Since we're on topic of Whisper Me a Love Song, since the first time we got introduced to their relation I WAS HOOKED. Everything about them was just so interesting and their storyline only highlighted their love later on. Plus I think both Shiho and Aki deserve to be happy after everything so I'm happy they're girlfriends.

Kumiko x Reina (Hibike! Euphonium) (Not Canon)

My thoughts: It physically hurt me to put not canon there because why? 😔 Honestly when I first started watching this show I thought they're so into each other until my brother spoiled me that they're indeed NOT into each other like that. Still in my heart they're girlfriends no matter what. No one will ever tell me there was absolutely nothing between them. I'm obsessed with them.

Chika x You (Love Live Sunshine) (Not Canon)

My thoughts: All of you Love Live stans may criticize me for talking about them first since "There's so much more better Love Live ships-" No. Nuh uh. Chika and You are my absolute fav ship in all of Love Live for some reason that I can't explain. They're just so cute and I may be a sucker for childhood friends trope in anime 🫠 The whole jealousy moment in the anime was feeding me too much and now it's showing fruits of it (Me being absolutely OBSESSED)

Ayumu x Yuu (Love Live Nijigasaki) (Not Canon)

My thoughts: Since we're on the topic of the childhood friends trope, obviously Ayumu and Yuu couldn't be missing from any part of this list. They're just so good together that it's shocking. Ayumu going yandere whenever a girl is close to Yuu and Yuu being absolute women charmer being surrounded by girls in the club is giving me life. They're just absolute adorable together and with them I'm absolutely sure they ended up together somewhere in the future.

[stellar-constellations]

An Alliance (Part 9)

        

        Fem! Spy! (Y/N) x Yuri Briar

        Parts: One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, current part, ten (to be continued when Spy x Family has more Yuri content!)

        (Y/N) is given her own backstory that is important for the story!

        The setting for this story is based off West and East Germany's (because Spy x Family is heavily based off Germany in the 1940-1950) laws (or at least replicated to the best of my abilities since it's unknown what time period Spy x Family is exactly in, we'll go with 1950 for the sake of this story). 

        Historically-accurate women misogyny and mistreatment! Only small comments and historically-accurate laws (replicated to the best of my ability). 

        The story, plot, and settings might not match up to the Spy x Family manga as it's not completed and the manga is still being crafted.

        This series contains spoilers for the manga and anime!

        A couple weeks passed by and Yuri decided he wanted to visit Yor. Yuri's wound had healed up a little so I allowed it (by allowed, I mean I tried to restrain him and gave up since he was too strong and determined to see Yor).

        During those months I gathered some intel from the National Unity Party that I didn't know about until talking with Twilight about little details of his current mission (or doing a little bit of hacking into Eden Academy's files). I learned that WISE's top suspect is Donovan Desmond has two children I wasn't aware of, Damien and Demetrius Desmond, along with a wife, Melinda Desmond. A little trip to City Hall and snooping through some files and database there, I found out what they look like along with their private information such as their birthday and where they work.

        I wrote down everything I saw (even stuff I figured didn't matter) and placed it into a big white envelope with a false train logo imprinted on it, handing it to Franky when I saw him at the train station on the way back. How I did this without Yuri knowing? I got him drunk and made sure he was sleeping when I left. 

        But Vixen—the West Spy—doesn't matter right now. (Y/N)—Yuri Briar's wife and secret SSS agent—does.

        Yuri happily skipped to the Forger's apartment, barging in quite rudely as I trailed behind him, used to this routine by now.

        "Yay, my sweet sister! I came by for an early morning visit!" Yuri shouted.

        "I'm not satisfied with our life together!" Yor shouted at Twilight.

        Yuri's face morphed to horror (as did mine and Twilight's).

        Twilight and Yor are having relationship problems?! I thought to myself. This is really bad! Twilight's goal is to maintain a family to get closer to Donovan Desmond. If this is ruined, WISE will have to start all over again, and who knows how long it'd be until Donovan does something drastic that breaks this very thin ice Westalis and Ostania is on! We'll have another physical war!

        "LOID FORGER, YOU BASTARD! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY SISTER?!" Yuri screamed, pointing an accusatory finger at Twilight. 

        "Let's not get hasty! We haven't heard both sides of the story!" I smiled nervously, grabbing his shoulder.

        "Yuri? Didn't you get hit by a truck and hurt your shoulder not a little while ago? You should be resting!" Yor spoke, concerned.

        "That healed up right when I talked to you on the phone! More importantly..." Yuri spoke dully, then his tone changed as he got serious. "I warned you, Loid Forger, that if you ever made my sister cry, I would have you exe– er... I would be extremely upset." 

        "Yuri, no! It isn't like that!" Yor claimed.

        It's not?

        "So then what is it like, Yor?" Yuri questioned.

        "Um..." Yor stumbled, thinking.

        "Tell me so I can properly chastise this ne-er-do-well!" Yuri spoke, then looked as if an idea struck him. "If I can keep her angry at him, she'll finally dump him like I've wanted all along." Yuri muttered.

        "Um... you're thinking out loud." Me and Twilight spoke.

        "All right, Yor. Let's get you out of this marriage. We'll go file the divorce papers right now!" Yuri exclaimed.

        "Wait a second, Yuri! I'm sure this can be justified! Let's not get into something so big like that!" I spoke, worried for the future of Ostania and Westalis.

        "We're not getting divorced!" Yor claimed.

        "Yor, have you been holding on to this grievance all along...?" Twilight questioned, a million thoughts going through his calm blue eyes.

        "No, just since yesterday." Yor smiled ditzyily, causing Twilight to go wide-eyed.

        "WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY SISTER YESTERDAY?!" Yuri shouting, pointing his finger at Twilight again.

        "He didn't do anything!" Yor exclaimed.

        THEN WHAT ARE YOU MAD AT HIM FOR?! I thought to myself, yet held my inner peace as I watched the scene play out.

        "Apologize. I don't know what you did, but you're going to apologize to my sister." Yuri spoke, his tone intimidating me despite me not being at the end of his words.

        "I am so deeply sorry, Yor. I never–" Twilight started, but was cut off by Yor.

        "Loid, no! An apology from you is the last thing I want!" Yor claimed, causing Twilight to have a mortified expression on his face as I saw the Ostanian military clean their guns, ready for their command to infiltrate and kill.

        "HOW DARE YOU ATTEMPT TO APOLOGIZE YOUR WAY OUT OF THIS, YOU FLIPPANT LOUSE!" Yuri screamed, still pointing his finger at Twilight.

        "I understand, Yor. You want me to show contriction through my actions. And I will! I swear to you, I won't ever make you suffer this way again!" Twilight spoke.

        "TH-THAT'S EXACTLY THE PROBLEM!" Yor shouted.

        "HUH?!" Twilight and I exclaimed.

        I can hear the marching of Ostania's army. I can smell ashes from fire and gunpowder. 

        "Yuri, please, could you just stay out of this? This is a martial issue between me and my husband!" Yor scolded, directing her anger towards Yuri.

        "M-martial?!" Yuri exclaimed, a shocked and dejected expression on his face.

        Yuri depressingly made his way to the couch and flopped down, deflating like a ballon as he laid on the couch.

        Yor said this is a martial issue between her and Twilight, so I shouldn't get in the way too, I thought as I sat down next to the sulking Yuri. 

        The phone starting to ring and Yor quickly ran to go answer it.

        "Oh. I'll get it." Yor spoke. "Hello, this is Mrs. Forger." She answered, then redirected her attention to Twilight. "Loid, it's for you. It's from the hospital." 

        "Yes, hello?" Twilight spoke, answering the phone.

        Hospital? Oh, right! Twilight's cover job is a physiatrist for this mission!

        "I'm sorry. I've been called in for an emergency." Twilight stated, hanging up the phone.        

        "Oh dear, that sounds serious." Yor spoke, before it was like a switch was flipped in her as she started to shout. "EVEN ON YOUR DAYS OFF, YOU ABANDON YOUR FAMILY FOR WORK! HOW COULD YOU?! HOW COULD I EVER BE SATISFIED WITH THE WAY YOU ALWAYS PUT YOUR PATIENT'S FIRST?!" 

        "I'm sorry, Yor. We'll talk about this when I get back." Twilight stated calmly, sparing me a glance before walking out. "I really am sorry!" he exclaimed before walking out and shutting the door.

        Yor had a prideful smirk on her face as she looked at me and Yuri (Yuri seemed like he had a skeptical look on his face as he looked at the door Twilight just left).

        "Yor, I really don't mean to pry into your martial problems, but I really believe you need to think about this." I sighed.

        "Huh? But having gripes is a normal thing for marriages, right?" Yor questioned.

        "Of course, but you should understand his side too. You're claiming he spends too much time at work, correct?" I questioned, making sure I got the facts straight.

        "Yes, that is a normal gripe wives have against their husbands, right?" Yor spoke, genuinely seeming like she needed a gripe to appear normal.

        What's she need a gripe to appear normal for anyways? I thought to myself.

        "I hate to give unsolicited advice, but Loid works to provide for your family. I understand that you grieve the lack of time he spends with you and your daughter, but he's a physiatrist. He helps aid people's mental health to prevent something drastic happening. Life and death doesn't wait, that's just apart of this job. However, I do understand you. I believe it's a good idea to have a family outing soon, that way you're able to spend time with Loid and Anya!" I suggested. "That's just my idea though." 

        "I suppose, I could bring it up with Loid..." Yor mumbled.

        "I think it'd be fun for everyone! And don't worry, it's perfectly normal for couples to fight; I mean, me and Yuri fight quite regularly." I reassured. 

        "Yuri? You have gripes with (Y/N)?" Yor questioned, surprised.

        "Huh, yeah. Whatever you say, sis." Yuri spoke, his eyes not moving from the door.

        "Yes! Like this one right now." I smiled. "Yuri! You need to stop adding fuel to the fire! Yor was right! When a couple is arguing with each other, keep out of it! You could've actually did some serious damage to their relationship by bringing up divorce! We didn't even know what started the fight!" I shouted, grabbing Yuri by his shirt and forcing him to look me in the eyes and away from the door.

        "O-okay..." Yuri mumbled. "But something's fishy!" he spoke, redirecting his gaze to the door.

        "What?!" Yor exclaimed, seemingly worried.

        "The way he ran off in such a hurry just now... He's cheating on you, Yor." Yuri accused.

        "WHAT THE HELL DID I JUST TELL YOU ABOUT ADDING FUEL TO THE FIRE?!" I screamed, resisting the urge to uppercut him.         

        "What?!" Yor gasped.

        "Let's go follow him." Yuri spoke.

        "W-we can't do that!" Yor tried to reason.

        "I agree! We can't do that, Yuri! Have you no shame?!" I exclaimed.

        He's acting like he's following one of the people suspected of espionage at our job (or my SSS gig)!      

        "You aren't worried at all, Yor? About your so-called husband cheating?" Yuri questioned, turning to look at Yor.        

         "Well... maybe just a little..." Yor muttered.

        I was about to interject, say some wistful words about "how relationships should have trust" before remembering when I bickered with Yuri about if he'd fall in love with someone else and cheat before we agreed to get officially married.

        I felt like I was about to throw up, I don't want to be a hypocrite! But I also don't want there to be another physical war between Ostania and Westalis! But if Yuri finds out that Twilight is a spy and he gets caught, then Twilight's mission to keep peace between Ostania and Westalis will be screwed!

        "You need to be careful that he doesn't notice you, Yor." Yuri instructed. "Stay close, but not too close. You need room in case the target suddenly stops. You can't stop yourself, or you'll get spotted."

        "You sure know a lot about this, Yuri." Yor commented.

        "Uh... they just said that on some cartoon I watched with chihuahua girl the other day..." Yuri claimed.

        Dummy, we weren't even here! You were healing up from your wound, remember? I thought to myself.          

         I heard some noise from an alley and peaked over, seeing our lieutenant!

        What does he want? I thought to myself as Yuri noticed.

        "I-I-I-I-I'm sorry, Yor! I just remembered I had some paperwork that I forgot to file yesterday!" Yuri exclaimed. "Stay with Yor." Yuri whispered into my ear.

        "Huh?" Yor gasped.

        "I have to run back to the ministry! You go expose Loi-Loi's infidelity by yourself, okay?!" Yuri spoke. "I'm really sorry!" he shouted as he ran from us.

        "Hey, wait a minute! Yuri!" Yor shouted.

        Shouting? Thanks for giving us away... I thought to myself, then redirected my thoughts to the serious matters. Two emergency summons today? There's something going on between WISE and the SSS today. I can't go to the SSS since Yuri ordered me not to, but I should be able to go to WISE? I'll follow Twilight.

        Me and Yor kept following him as he walked into the hospital, allowing Yor to see for herself that she's actually going to "work." 

        "See, Yor? You have nothing to worry about. When has Loid ever given you a reason to doubt him?" I smiled. 

        "You're right. This was childish..." Yor sighed. "We can go home and make some tea." Yor suggested, smiling at me.

        "I would love to, but I'm on the lookout for an anniversary present for Yuri." I smiled sheepishly. "This is the only time that he's not with me, so I need to hurry before I have to get to work myself later!"

        "Ah, I understand! Do you need any help?" Yor questioned.

        "No thanks, I want to give him something straight from my heart." I spoke. "Have a good day, Yor! Tell Anya I said hi!" I spoke, jogging off to the streets away from the hospital.

        I ducked into an alleyway and waited for Yor to leave the hospital, making sure her back was turned from me before running back to the hospital. I ran into the lobby and walked through the halls, finding a nurse. 

        "Excuse me, I have an appointment for Dr. Forger, but I got lost and I don't know where his office his." I smiled.

        "Ah, no problem! This hospital is pretty big. I'll guide you, follow me." The nurse spoke.

        I followed the nurse to an office as she knocked on the door.

        "Come in." I heard Twilight's voice as we opened the door.

        "(Y-) Mrs. Briar?" Twilight spoke, looking at me as a white-haired woman stood next to him.

        I recognized her as Nightfall. She's very pretty, but she's very scary to me, so I stay clear from her. 

        "Mrs. Briar has an appointment with you, Dr." The nurse stated.

        "Thank you. Come on in, Mrs. Briar." Twilight spoke. 

        I nodded, walking in and closing the door behind him.

        Bugged? I morsed through my blinks.

        Safe space. Twilight morsed with his own eyes.

        "You're Nightfall, correct?" I spoke in a soft voice just in case the walls were thin as I held out a hand.

        "You know her?" Nightfall questioned, eyeing my hand like it was gum on her shoe.

        "Yes, this is Vixen. She's infiltrated the SSS and is up to date with information from them. I heard from the Handler you're back on the force." Twilight informed. "What brings you here?"

        "The SSS." I spoke. "An emergency summon happened today with the SSS. I was informed from my husband to not attend, so I'm here." 

        "You came here without orders from the Handler?" Twilight questioned, his eyebrows raised in surprise.

        "I need information from WISE and the SSS so I can determine accurate and inaccurate information to feed the Handler." I explained.

        "You're married to an SSS agent?" Nightfall spoke, a glare on her face.

        "Just for this mission." I smiled.

        "There's no time to send the Handler a message. We'd bring you, but your husband will identify you immediately." Twilight spoke.

        "There must be something I can do. I'm still apart of WISE, after all." I huffed.

        "Fine. Let's make haste, the SSS may already be on the scene." Twilight sighed. "Nightfall, the details." 

        Nightfall gave me a glare before reluctantly speaking up.        

        "We have an extreme level 3 situation. WISE HQ in Ostania has been trying to ferret out a mole. Yesterday, they finally uncovered the culprit. However, by the time they were identified, the mole had gone underground. And right around the same time, numerous top secret documents were taken from agency files. Among them was a coded map indicating areas of operational activity by WISE agents in Ostania. And some of the information contained within that document pertains of Operation STRIX. If that were to fall into Eastern hands and be decoded... our lives would be in danger." Nightfall explained in a mouthful.

        I'm unaware of the SSS receiving new files, so it hasn't been delivered yet. I thought to myself. I haven't seen anyone at the SSS that is a spy at WISE, could it be a new recruit? I'm aware of the new woman that came aboard, she's a total rookie, but the Director really wanted her onboard. But I doubt she's the mole, it's just a gut feeling. I don't know of any new rookies other than her, so it must be someone whose been at the SSS for longer than me, but if that's the case. I might not be able to help... unless.

        "Hey, I got an idea. I'm heading to the library, take this. It's a tracker so I know where you guys are, I'll meet up with you both later." I spoke, handing Twilight a small chip that he attached to his collar without second thought. 

        "You better hurry with whatever you have to do. Nightfall, you and I will make our way to the scene." Twilight spoke.

        "Be careful!" I exclaimed, quickly opening and shutting the door as I ran down the hall.

        I followed the way the nurse guided me to the office and made it out of the hospital, running into town and to the HQ of SSS. I checked the clock and knew it was time. I clocked in and ran to find a guy who owes me a favor (by that, I mean making someone do my work).

        "Hey, Donnie! I need a favor, buddy." I spoke, patting his shoulder.

        "Oh, what's up?" he smiled.

        "Today's your anniversary, right?" I questioned.

        "Huh? Today's my anni- OH! TODAY'S MY ANNIVERSARY! NO WONDER CARMEN WAS ANGRY AT ME THIS MORNING- but that never seems to be new..." He spoke, going through many stages of shock. 

        "Listen, today's my anniversary with Yuri! I can pick you up an anniversary present too for Carmen if you put my name in your document with yours." I spoke, referring to the document he was writing as he listened to a bugged room on one of our potential suspects. "This is the only time I can go out and get the present, but I need to be at work too! Please?" I spoke.

        I need to make sure that the SSS don't know I'm working with WISE in this part of the mission. If I mess with the information they gain, the SSS will kill me! I thought to myself. 

        "Yeah. I got you. Barely doing any work anyways with this! Thanks, (Y/N)!" he beamed. 

        "No worries, man! I'll see ya soon!" I spoke, rushing out of the room.

        I carefully checked the room with our schedule, making sure that there wasn't anybody there, before I ran out of the room. I ran to a nearby shop I knew that WISE was in control of, where you make anonymous purchases for wigs, outfits, and contacts to change your appearance for missions (or, their public front, for costume parties or parades). 

        I purchased a (different hair color) wig and a different shade of (eye color) for my contacts (making sure they were appropriate for my eyesight since I decided I wouldn't wear my glasses [if you wear glasses]). I grabbed a pink t-shirt, a white ribbon, black shorts, and a pair of brown boots. I made the purchase and ran into an alley, changing clothes and hiding my old outfit behind a dumpster in the dark alley. I threw a cereal box from the dumpster onto the ground near the alley entrance so I'd find my clothes as I raced out and to the library near city hall.

        I made inside and snagged a computer, taking a seat and quickly logging into the public computer with the library's username and password written on a yellow sticky-note on the desk. I wrote a fake name on the computer's public name log, then disabled the browser from any third-party trying to watch my internet activity. 

        I hacked into the SSS database, the screen going black with green letters.

        Woah, cliche hacking. I thought to myself, before quickly pushing away that thought. 

        It took longer than I'd like to admit it, but I finally found the information the Director receives from his little mole (perhaps my hacking skills are getting rusty). Sometimes there were emails but as I long as I thought really hard enough, I would crack the words they made up and proceed with the next file. This scum has been actively giving information on WISE for at least two years now, in fact, he was originally from Ostanian Intelligence before he got in WISE solely for Ostania's purpose! Worst of all, there's no name! All of his emails and files are signed off with W.W. Who had the initials W.W. that I'm aware of?        

        Nobody, that I can think of that the top of my head, that is. But the good thing about our day and age is that the library has public files for use, so marriage certificates and criminal records are available to me. 

        I need to get to the backroom and get those files so nobody knows I retrieved them, but I need those librarians to get away from that back door.

        I noticed a group of kids nearby and walked over to them, fishing in my pocket for some money. 

        "Wanna make some money?" I questioned, changing the pitch of my voice to a high but monotone tone, that way if there's any cameras or microphones here being watched by the SSS, they wouldn't recognize me. 

        The three kids nodded excitedly.

        "I need you guys to distract that librarian, but don't tell them that! Tell them you're looking for a book that's about a zebra becoming a tooth fairy and convince them to go look for it with you, okay?" I instructed.

        "Okay!" they all agreed, rushing towards the librarian's desk and distracting the librarian as I watched from behind a bookshelf.

        The librarian seemed a little stingy to leave, but they eventually agreed after some pestering from the kids. While they were distracted with that, I ran into the backroom and looked through metal cabinet files. I made it to a large drawer with the letter W written on a piece of tape. I scanned through the folders and papers rather impatiently since I'm on a timer. 

        I found the files of civilians and searched through, looking at the faces in case they'd be familiar. It's going to be a man since me and Chloe, our new recruit, are the only females in the SSS and we're both new. The only think I'm running off on is they're a man and their initials are W.W. I found a file that made me pause, observing the face more closely.

        He had a long face with white skin and blue, droopy eyes. His hair was blond and he has thick eyebrows with a fair and tall build. I checked the name, making sure that initials matched up (they did). I checked his birthdate and figured it was reasonable since he's a double-agent. The file said he works at the Ostanian Foreign Ministry (a cover-up in case WISE agents come snooping around here, like me). I swear I've seen those eyes before, whether at WISE HQ or Ostanian Intelligence. 

        I know I have a bad memory, but I really think I just found my guy! I thought to myself, smiling.

        I know that WISE had identified the mole, but looking at these files tells me how much Ostania really knows about WISE, and I know if that coded map from Westalian Intelligence gets out, it'll definitely end up in the National Unity Party somehow, then we're all screwed!

        I placed the file back where I found it, now having information on the target myself.

        Now I can hunt this mole down myself, I thought to myself, smiling at the irony itself.

        I looked around to make sure the librarian wasn't around as I exited the backroom, getting away from the librarian's desk and waiting for the librarian to give up on their search of the zebra tooth fairy book. It didn't take too long before the librarian complained about this being a waste of time, and going back to their desk.

        "Here. Thanks for your help, and ya didn't see me." I spoke with my undercover voice, handing the kids their well-earned money and running out of the library.

        I checked the watch on my hand, turning a tiny button twice, and seeing the clock's face get swapped to a black screen with a bunch of white lines, and green and red dot. The white lines are the streets of Ostania being displayed from the satellites, the red dot is my location, and the green dot is where Twilight is. 

        I won't be able to run that far on foot, and the train would take too long (not to mention I'd have to hop multiple trains too).

        My only option is to steal a car. Well, it's for the greater good. I'll return it! I convinced myself, before finding a motorcycle on the street left unattended.

        Or... we'll be dramatic! I smiled, running up and hopping on it. 

        I grabbed the wires and retraced the steps I remember one of my WISE trainers telling me a while ago. I burnt my hand a couple times and lost the feeling in them, but I finally got it working as I heard the beautiful cat purr of the engine. 

        I checked my watch once more, looking at the location of Twilight once more and memorizing it as I fixed the white ribbon in my wig, making sure my wig was secured very tightly to my head by tying the ribbon on. I turned the gas and rode away. Judging by how far it looks on my digital map, they must be either in or nearby Shellbury, in Northwest Ostania. It'll probably take a good thirty minutes to get there—that is if I abide by traffic laws, but again, I'm on a timer and the small "peace treaty" Westalis and Ostania is in danger, so we're going fast enough that it'll make lightning look slow.

        I got there in ten minutes, internally glad of saving time as I parked the motorcycle on the side of the road, checking my watch to see Twilight wasn't too far. I made it to a fountain in some park, seeing one of SSS' captains meeting with Winston. 

        I sat down on a bench, eavesdropping into their conversation for any leverage.

        "How about you hand over those files, Wheeler. WISE seems to have gotten wind of the meet, so I don't want to drag this out." The captain spoke.

        Yes, yes. WISE agents like me, I internally thought, yet shut myself up so I can focus. 

        "Before I do... I want to verify that you're really with the State Security Service." Winston responded.

        The briefcase he's holding must be the files, I could shoot him with the gun on my waist under my shirt, but that's extremely risky. 

        "What, you think I'm really Twilight, Master of Disguise? Ha ha. Good one." The captain laughed. "Can you prove to me that you're the real Wheeler?" 

        "My green tie and yellow gemstone tiepin already have." Winston informed. 

        "Mm... hey, it's yellow." The captain spoke, looking at one of his men.

        "Got it." The lackey spoke, walking away to make a call.

        What is going on? Is that a code the SSS made I'm unaware of? Well, with my low-rank position it is possible. I'll have to find information on their secret codes later.

        "As for... Our fake Wheeler here... Is that you, Twilight?" the captain spoke.

        Twilight? I thought to myself, checking my watch. He is! No wonder why Twilight's location showed up here! I can't believe I forgot about that!

        "That really is an incredible impersonation of Wheeler. You're every bit as good as they say you are." The captain spoke, reaching into his jacket's pocket and pulling out a gun. "So, what's next now? You gonna peel off that disguise for me?" 

        I reached for my own gun, ready for combat in case Twilight needs some help as I watched Twilight wiggle his foot. Suddenly, the big water fountain next to them blew up. Someone fired at Twilight as he ran, clicking a button on his briefcase that turned the bottom of the briefcase into a gun!

        Woah! I didn't know HQ had those! A whole shoot-out took place and I decided this wasn't the place for me. If I get shot and Yuri notices, he'll know I didn't follow his instructions, and that I was possibly working with WISE!

        I ran away and ducked behind some bushes surrounded by a fence, hiding in them as I checked Twilight's location on my watch.

        He's running straight for me? 

        I peeked my head out slightly, seeing a figure running to my spot. I ducked back into the bushes so I wouldn't get caught, hearing more footsteps running towards me.

        "Yuri!" a pair of guys shouted.

        Yuri?! Yuri's here?! Crap! 

        I felt my heartbeat raise out of fear for myself and Yuri's sake. This place really seems to be dangerous, he shouldn't be here! Twilight and I are here!

        "You still with us, man?!" one shouted.

        "Yeah, where did he go?!" the other shouted.

        "Ngh..." Yuri groaned.

        Is he injured? How?! Who ran into him and hurt him?!

        "The East gate..." Yuri mumbled.

        Huh, that's weird. He sounds like Yuri, but not at the same time? Is this... Twilight? I checked my watch to see his location, it proving my correct.

        "East! Got it!" they shouted as they ran away to find Twilight (who was right in front of them). 

        I very carefully peeked my head out and saw "Yuri" standing up, adjusting his jacket.

        "Oi!" I exclaimed, standing up from the bushes 

        I don't have to be careful, I'm in a disguise! I remembered.

        "Yuri" turned around quickly, looking at me with a surprised expression.

        "Um... hey...?" he paused.

        "No worries, Twilight. It's me, Vixen." I smiled as his composure relaxed.

        "Thank God, it's you. That's a decent disguise—amateurish, but it works well enough."

        "Sure as hell worked on the Master of Disguise." I smirked pridefully. "Now, what's next?" 

        "Let's make our getaway." Twilight spoke, looking around before his eyes landed on a sewer gate.

        "Ah, shit..." I mumbled, knowing what we'd have to do.

        Gross...

        "Let's go." Twilight ordered.

        "Yes, boss!" I joked, trying to make light out of this situation as we walked through some mud.

        I lifted the heavy cover and jumped in, Twilight following after as he closed the lid.

        "Stay quiet, light on your feet, and look out for all exits and entrances." Twilight muttered.

        "I'm a spy too, remember?" I huffed quietly.

        Even after all these years, he still has the audacity to treat me like I don't know anything. 

        We started running and heard some footsteps up ahead around the corner. Twilight efficiently kicked up a metal pipe for me as he ran. I caught it and gripped it tightly as he pulled out his gun, getting ready to fight.

        I felt a warm sense of admiration that he gave me the metal pipe since he's aware I don't like using guns, not after what I've used them for in the war. 

        We past the corner as Twilight shot, but instead we saw, Yuri, the real Yuri!

        Twilight's shot missed him, hitting his hat instead, as Twilight paused, making me pause too. Twilight's gun was aimed directly at Yuri's face, I was going to shout and tell him no, but he held his hand, behind me and only for me to see.

        He's telling me to stand down and stay behind him—like always...

        "Gah!" they both exclaimed.

        Yuri hasn't spotted me... he's too focused on Twilight that he hasn't seen me! This is good!

        Two gunshots rang simultaneously, one hitting the gun out of Yuri's hand and into the sewer water and the other piercing Twilight's shoulder. 

        "Guh!" Twilight voiced his pain as Yuri kicked Twilight's gun out of his hand then stepping back to make room as the gun hit the sewer wall before going into the sewer water too.

        Twilight clutched his shoulder tightly, a serious and frustrated expression on his face as they both stood still, looking at each other. They both look similar to each other, it's really scary. The only difference is that Loid is 6'1" and Yuri is 5'10". I wondered briefly on how good Yuri is at hand-to-hand combat, before seeing it myself.

        "Give up..." Yuri started, raising his fists. "And come quietly!" 

        He punched at Twilight, but Twilight dodged it and kicked him in the gut, giving Yuri a punch to his face as he fell down. While Yuri was distracted, I threw Twilight a white cloth from my pocket for emergencies just as this.

        I have to make sure I'm prepared in case me or someone else gets shot or is bleeding intensely. I've learned from my past mistakes.

        Yuri stood up, his fists raised once more, having a mark on his face as Twilight wrapped the cloth around his bleeding wound. 

        "Stop resisting and surrender. We've got the sewer surrounded." Yuri claimed.

        There's no way! They didn't figure it out this quickly that we were down here, did they?

        "If you don't want to die here, run back to the surface. Now." Twilight commanded, mimicking Yuri's voice pretty well.

        I understand why Twilight sounds different from Yuri. Twilight speaks in a calm and collected tone, always serious. Yuri, he speaks with his tone, he's very open about his feelings. 

        "DON'T TALK TO ME IN MY OWN VOICE!" Yuri screamed, rushing at Twilight. 

        Twilight quickly undid his belt and whipped Yuri in the jaw, hard, with it as he drew blood and possibly even broke his jaw! Yuri fell hard onto the ground as Twilight looked down at him.

        "You may not be eating any decent meals for a while, but you'll live." Twilight spoke.

        He's showing Yuri mercy. Could it be for operation STRIX? So Yor wouldn't be devastated and the family falls apart? Could it be he's aware of my feelings for Yuri and doesn't wish to kill him out of respect (or pity) towards me? Or, could it be he's genuinely grown attached to his "in-law"?

        That should be enough, I thought, worried for Yuri's safety and health. I'll make him some southern stew tonight, he really likes that since it came from his childhood. 

        Twilight turned around, giving me a nod as he started to walk away. I almost turned to follow, but I heard the sound of metal and raised my metal pipe. I turned the corner to face Yuri, our metal pipes clashing together. I pulled his leg from under him with my own leg, then used my metal pipe to shove him backwards, kicking the metal pipe that fell out of his hands into the sewer water.

        "You're wrong, Twilight! It's you who won't be eating any decent meals... in your prison cell!" Yuri spoke, spitting out blood.

         Wow, even though I'm right in front of his face and entered the fight, he's still caring about Twilight.

        "And who the hell are you?!" Yuri shouted.

        I ignored his comment, afraid if I talked he's recognize my voice as I stared him down.

        I really, really, don't want to fight him.

        Twilight noticed my hesitancy and was about to speak up, but Yuri charged at me. I hit him upside the head with my metal pipe with some heavy force, hoping to at least knock him out or disorient him so we can run and avoid further harm to him.         

        Yuri staggered to his side but quickly punched and hit my jaw.

        Man, he packs a punch! I thought, hearing a clack! 

        I grabbed him by his jacket and pinned him against the sewer wall as he grabbed my wig and pulled it. The wig fell as he looked at me, confused as my natural hair came down.

         "Wh-" I used his confusion to my advantage, grabbed his own hair and quickly turned him around so he was facing the sewer wall, slamming his head three times in the concrete wall before pulling back.

        Twilight quickly threw himself into the mix and karate-chopped Yuri's throat, coming up behind Yuri and elbowing him into the ground, (even giving a good kick to in-between Yuri's legs).

        I wanted to scold Twilight for being too harsh and mean (like I wasn't slamming his head against concrete a few seconds ago), but I understood Yuri's looking to kill (or at least capture) us both and watched on. 

        Yuri stood his ground and Twilight punched his face as I knelt to the ground and slammed my metal pipe into the back of his knee with full force. I ran back to Twilight's side as Yuri fell down, but he just got back up!

        Jesus Christ! Yuri Briar is seriously a force to be dealt with, how is he standing?!

        "Don't hold back this time." Twilight spat out harshly, his eyes kept on Yuri.

        "YOU BASTARD! I AIN'T!" Yuri shouted, holding his fist up and rushing towards Twilight as I took a deep breath and hid behind Twilight, clutching my metal pipe tightly and raised it.

        He said not to hold back. Sorry, love. I thought to myself. Consider this payback for my jaw.

        Yuri got closer and Twilight quickly side-stepped, leaving me vulnerable. Yuri didn't even stagger as he changed his target to me, but his eyes widened. 

        He ran too fast, so he can't stop now. His only option is to move forward and attack, even hesitate his attack now and he's screwed (which, he really can't stop now anyways).

        "He was talking to me." I huffed, making my pitch and tone high and monochrome as I did earlier in the library. 

        I swung my metal pipe down hard onto his head, the force even hurting my own arms as he fell cold onto the ground. 

        We watched closely as Yuri was on the ground, making sure he'd stay there. To my surprise, Yuri stood up, causing me and Twilight to let out a scream of shock. I swung my metal pipe upwards, hitting his jaw as he fell back to the ground. Me and Twilight watched on to make sure he was fully down as I held my metal pipe up high.

        Twilight huffed heavily as breathed in, finally glad it's over and that he's still alive.

        "Yor... I'm so... sorry..." he mumbled before passing out (for real this time).

        "Ready?" Twilight huffed out.

        I nodded, staring at Yuri before leaning down and checking his pulse.

        "He's fine." Twilight confirmed. 

        "I just have to make sure..." I mumbled, checking Yuri's pockets. 

        I found a walkie-talkie and looked at Twilight. 

        "Do his voice. Tell him to come find him; that he's injured." I ordered, shoving the walkie-talkie in his hand.

        "Are you serious right now?!" he hissed. "We gotta get outta here!" 

        "He's hurt!" I huffed. 

        "Fine..." Twilight groaned, grabbing the walkie-talkie. "Yuri Briar. Injured. Help, over." He spoke, talking in his tone.

        "Thank you." I smiled.

        "Let's move." Twilight spoke, grabbing my hand.

        Twilight started to run while clutching his shoulder as I followed, running ahead of him in case of any danger. I have to be able to protect him since he's injured. We ran a while until we heard different footsteps, causing Twilight to grab my arm and stop the both of us. The footsteps stopped as Twilight carefully led us to a corner. He peeked out of the corner as I watched his expression to see if it changes, indicating he saw something. I turned to look at my right just in case anybody was there, looking just in time to see a tall man holding up a brick and aiming it right at my head.

        "Oi!" I shouted, alerting Twilight of the man's prescence as I quickly ducked, bringing my metal pipe up and wacking his jaw. 

        The brick was crushed in the man's hand as it collided with the concrete wall.

        He was going to hit me with that! That would've killed me!

        Twilight grabbed my pink shirt's collar as he jumped backwards, forcing me away from the man. 

        "Winston Wheeler!" I shouted.

       "You're him!" Twilight exclaimed, quickly tapping a finger on my lower back as he let go of my collar.

        Don't, he's telling me. 

        "You're Winston Wheeler, right? Relax! I'm with the SSS! I was pursuing a wise agent down in the sewers! I don't know what you're doing here, but I sure am glad to see you! Captain Gascoigne and the others are waiting for you back that way! Let's join up with them!" Twilight spoke, grabbing a SSS badge out of his pocket. 

        I, too, grabbed a badge out of my own SSS pocket out of my pocket. 

        "How about you show me your I.D. to be sure." Winston spoke, outstretching his hand.

        "Okay." Twilight obliged, giving him his badge as I did the same with mine.

        "I don't match up with my badge at the moment, I'm in disguise." I explained.

        "What about the guy you were pursuing?" Winston questioned.

        "Securing you is our priority." Twilight spoke as I nodded.

        "WISE is here and infiltrated, we can worry about the agent later." I added as I crossed my arms.

        "Lieutenant Yuri Briar and Lieutenant (Y/N) Briar. You're married?" Winston spoke as Twilight crept behind him.

        Twilight came behind him and suddenly Winston turned his back, kicking Twilight in his stomach.

        "Or is that just the face you're wearing?" Winston commented.

        I immediately raised and slammed my metal pipe on his knee, causing him to huff and hop back a few steps. 

        "Nice try. Before you silenced them, your footsteps were those of someone being chased. You should know better than to lie like that." Winston spoke, the leg I hit raised from the ground as I yanked Twilight by his collar and pulled him up from the ground.

        "I don't understand you, woman. I've seen that hair before, facial structure too, and your badge just proves it. You're apart of the SSS too; are you aware of this?" Winston spat, his last question directed towards Twilight.

        "Course I am, you really didn't think you were the only double-agent, huh?" I smirked, my metal pipe raised. 

        "Huh. So you're both WISE. Those are really good disguises. Could you actually be him? Could you be Twilight?" Winston questioned. "We did an OP together once, remember? But I never got to see your face. So... let's take a look at that illustrious face of yours. Couldn't hurt to have one more gift for the SSS..." 

        "You gotta get through me first, pal." I spat out.

        I don't need to hold back at all. I can just kill him and have it over with; his life holds no more worth, not after he traded mankind for some extra pocket change. At least with me, I'm doing this to keep peace, not destroy it.

        "If I were you, I'd run. A weak woman like you is no match for me." Winston spoke, clutching his knuckles.

        So what he's taller and stronger than me? I'll whoop his ass! I thought to myself, grinding my teeth. 

        I clutched my metal pipe tightly, then threw it at him. He caught it with no thought.

        "That was stup-" I reached into my shirt and grabbed my gun around my waist, firing straight at his head.

        He dodged it effortlessly, then ran towards me with my metal pipe. I ducked and shot his kneecap, using the floor and rocketing my elbow into his stomach. His grip loosened on the pipe as I grabbed it and slammed the pipe down on his back, knocking him to the ground.

        He grabbed my leg and pulled it under, making me fall onto the ground and hit my head on the concrete floor.

        Shit, I thought as my head rang and felt a painful sensation, followed by something wet in my hair. That better be sewer water and not blood... I thought as he quickly got on top of me and balled up his fists.

        He hit me straight in my face, hearing a crack in my nose as I reached for my gun and aimed at his face. He dodged to his right as I pulled the trigger, his weight shifting, giving me the opening to roll my body right and make him fall. I stood up and stomped on his hand, kicking the metal pipe away from his hands as I took a few steps back. 

        Twilight grabbed the pipe as we both stood next to each other, I huffed as we kept our gaze on him.

        "His fists... are made of pure steel." I panted, blood flooding out of my nose, but I didn't dare care to raise my hand and cover it, I need both hands for this fight. 

        I kept my gun trained on his head, pulling the trigger. He ducked and rushed towards us, running to Twilight and throwing a punch. Twilight blocked it with his uninjured shoulder, but Winston was too quick and used his injured leg to hit Twilight on the side of his head, knocking him out. 

        I took the opportunity to fire while his back was facing me, but it was as if he knew this as he ducked low, quickly grabbing the metal pipe and blocking the bullet, creating a dent in the pipe before he struck it at me. I stepped back to avoid his swing, but he quickly grabbed my gun and fired it at the wall six times, wasting all of my rounds. 

        "Heckler and Koch P7. Eight rounds in a magazine. Not much for a shootout, but luckily you're not in one." Winston spoke, throwing the empty gun to his side. "You won't ever be in one after I'm finished with you." He threatened, raising his fists.

        "I don't think that was necessary." I huffed, lowering my stance and widening my footing so I could prepare just about an action I need that's necessary in the moment. 

        "Just evening th-" I quickly righthooked him while he was too busy yapping, then kicked him, hard, in his nether regions. 

        "Ammo cost money, bastard." I huffed. "To pay for the money you've wasted, I'll take your life." I brought my elbow into his back, aiming for his spinal cord and hitting it. 

        It should paralyze him for a few seconds. I thought, rushing to grab the metal pipe out of his large hands. 

        I would run, but I'm not going to leave Twilight here; he'll kill him. I thought, angry at this situation. I need to buy time, WISE must be aware that Twilight hasn't returned, WISE has trackers on everyone, so they'll find him.

        I turned around to see Winston already on his feet, in fact, behind me! He tried to elbow the back of my neck but I dodged, backflipping onto his back and wrapping my thighs around his neck tightly. He tried to pry me off him, but I refused. I've always been stronger in my legs, now that I'm here, he's a fly that's right in my trap now.

        I wrapped my arms around my thighs too so I can direct more pressure to him. He's a strong and tall man, who knows how long he can hold his breath. I need him to pass out, then I'll kill him right here and now. 

        He coughed, scratching my legs but to no avail. He backed up to the sewer wall, slamming his back and the back of my head into the concrete wall. He backed into it multiple times before I felt my vision stagger, a terrible headache forming as I felt my grip loosen. He noticed and grabbed my shirt's collar, throwing me down to where Twilight was knocked out. 

        I can't do this. He's so strong... I thought to myself. If only I had the endurance Yuri has, maybe then I can take him on.

        I huffed, sitting up, only for him to place his black boot onto my cheek and roughly hit my head back onto the floor. 

        "Such a shame, I've always been a fan of cold-hearted woman." Winston spoke. "I told you, should've ran when you had the chance." He spoke, applying more pressure under his foot. 

        He's going to crush my skull... I thought, my head pounding terribly.

        "While you die, I might as well see what Twilight's face really is." Winston spoke, reaching down next to me where Twilight was and grabbing his face mask. 

        "I hope... you fall onto that metal pipe... and tear your ass open." I huffed, the left side of my face smushed onto the ground as my right cheek was under his foot. 

        My vision was fading a black and white, a color I remembered from the war in Westalis when I was younger and lost my vision, or when I'd faint many times during my training in the army and in WISE. If only I was taller, stronger, worked out more or even took some extra missions, maybe then I could've fended him off. Maybe then I could've kept peace between Ostania and Westalis.

        I hate this feeling, I was always left behind. Even as a kid, my growth was stunted after I turned ten, promptly after joining the military. The work they put me through had negative effects on my body, my eyes, my ears, my memory, and my health. I couldn't grow like the other kids after that, but I guess I truly lost my childhood innocence when I forced my way into the Westalis Army like that. How childish I was.

        I heard footsteps and trailed my eyes to where I heard them, seeing a woman with black hair. 

        Is she apart of the SSS? I thought, then recognized her pretty eyes. Nightfall! I've never been more glad to see her! I felt a smile crawl onto my face. Twilight should be in good hands now, so I don't have to fight anymore. 

        I allowed my guard to go down as I closed my eyes, taking a quick power nap.

        .

        .

        The ringing in my ears was loud, along with the pain I heard screaming in my body. I heard muffled talking, recognizing Twilight's voice, but it was younger.

        "You're going to have to do more than that to take me down." Twilight spoke.

        "Shut up! I'm going to kick your ass!" I screamed, forcing myself out of the mud I was in and charging at him

        Twilight quickly sidestepped and righthooked me, throwing me right back into the ground.

        "I hate you..." I huffed.

        "I've heard." Twilight smirked. 

        "This isn't fair. You're stronger and taller and older than me! I need like, a gun or something!" I exclaimed. 

        "Do you think the enemy cares about that? If you're armed or not?" Twilight questioned. "The only thing they care about is if your head is still attached." 

        I looked down, adverting eye-contact as I felt tears welt up in my eyes. 

        "Hey, you're still a kid. You'll grow up to be strong." Twilight spoke, sitting down next to me in the ground as he ruffled my hair.

        "But you're a teenager and you're strong!" I shouted. 

        "I worked hard for it. You just need to train a little more, even during your free time." Twilight spoke, slightly scolding me in that last part. 

        "So much work..." I sighed. 

        "You wanna be big and strong, right? Surpass me?" Twilight questioned.

        "Yeah." I confirmed.

        "Then get up and let's do this again." Twilight ordered, standing up from the ground. 

        I stood up and looked at the sun, looking for how long it'll be until dark, but I just saw my vision fading instead.

        .

        .

        I opened my eyes to find myself on someone's shoulders. I looked to my left and found a roughed-up Winston. I turned around and saw I was being carried by one of the SSS captains!

        Aw, crap, the SSS found me here! I thought to myself.        

        "She's awake!" the captain spoke, in a voice I did not recognize as his.

        "Are you okay, (Y/N)?" I heard Twilight's voice and smiled in relief, seeing him not to far in front of us, carrying Nightfall on his uninjured shoulder.

        "Are you good?" I questioned. 

        "Always deflecting." He mumbled. "I'm okay."

        "I'm fine too. I just... really need a nap. And medical attention." I sighed, the headache I have almost felt like my head was splitting open.

        "Don't worry, we're almost out of here." Twilight spoke.

        I hopped off the imposter Captain's shoulder and followed them as we made our way out of the sewers, ending up in a van. 

        "We sure are lucky they stopped short of a full-scale mobilization with checkpoints and such. They refused to get the police involved from the start. Gotta be some reason they couldn't move overtly on this." Our driver spoke.

        "If our luck holds, we might actually make it all the way back to Berlint." The guy that was imposing as one of the SSS captains spoke (now out of his disguise).

        "At any rate, by catching Wheeler, we've succeeded in protecting the West's Intelligence assets in the East." Twilight spoke. 

        "Yeah, but we heard from Blue team that our mole in the SSS's comms team got taken out." The fake SSS captain said.

        "Even after catching Wheeler, we still can't get a clean win. It's hardly worth the effort." The driver spoke.

        "I tell you, I've had enough for today." The fake SSS captain said. "Hey, Twi-guy, you're getting a drink with me when we're back." 

        "HUH?!" Twilight exclaimed. "That's out of the question! I came here under the pretext of a work emergency! If I don't get home soon, it's going to look awfully suspicious."

        "Tch! Always the family man when you wanna get outta something." Fake captain said.

        "Being a family man is literally my mission." Twilight counterclaimed. "And especially today out of all days..." 

        "Oh? Are you and the wife fighting?" fake captain spoke.

        "Don't worry, Twilight. I feel you, man." I groaned, really hoping that Yuri wasn't at home right now.

        I still need to get an anniversary present for Donnie's wife, and for Yuri too. I owe him after all me and Twilight did to him today... I thought, sighing as my work wasn't done just yet. 

        "I don't know if I'd call it a fight, exactly..." Twilight sighed. "Let's just say I'm having trouble reading her feelings."                

        "So that even happens to the lofty Twilight, huh?" Fake captain spoke. 

        "It sounds like Operation STRIX is still in danger. I'll accompany Twilight home to investigate the source of friction." Nightfall spoke.

        "What's wrong with you? Get to a hospital already!" Twilight scolded, then looked at me. "You too!" 

        "Yeah, I probably got brain damage or something." I huffed, touching my head as I still felt it ache. 

        "Yeah, he's right. Only way to help a martial squabble is to stay the hell out of it." Fake captain spoke.

        We finally got to Berlint and I finally remembered the motorcycle I left back at Shellbury. 

        Ah, damn it. Well, the police will find it sooner or later. I'll just walk around. I thought to myself. 

        I looked at the stores open at this time, not finding many, but I did find a makeup store. 

        I remember from Yor that there was this new makeup kit every girl was after, but it's so expensive, so I should just buy that (I have the money with the two jobs I'm holding).

        Right! I still have to send in a report of today's events to WISE, along with the information the SSS has received, I thought, letting out a groan as I walk into the makeup store and quickly bought the makeup kit. 

        I headed to a flower shop and got some red carnations for Carmen too, thinking about what I'll get Yuri. A first-aid kit seems like a good investment at the moment for him (and me).

        I decided to grab some flowers for Yuri too. I heard guys never receive flowers, and I could believe that with the era we live in. I did a quick trip to the store and got a big stuffed bear for him too, that way he knows it was from the heart. 

        I also made a quick trip to the doctors, having them patch up my nose and the back of my head (apparently I got hit so much the back of my head broke open, so I'll have to return to remove these staples). I also washed the blood off my face and hands there, finding the alley I left my clothes in thanks to my little cereal box. I changed clothes and got rid of my eye contacts, wearing my glasses (if you have them) once more. I made it back to the SSS headquarters seeing a very worried Donnie.

        "You're so late! I thought that you had to leave for an hour or two, not the whole day!" Donnie exclaimed.

        "The line for this damn product, I swear!" I huffed, lying to Donnie as I gave him the makeup kit and one of the bouquets. "It was expensive as hell so consider that an apology for how long it took. The demand is high for it."

        "Thanks! This means a lot! I clocked out for you too." Donnie smiled. "You need me to walk you home? It's very late." 

        "No thanks. Yuri's a jealous man." I laughed. 

        "You're right. Be safe! If you feel anyone's following you, just call me!" Donnie spoke.

        "You're a good man. Later!" I spoke, waving as I walked away with my bouquet and my teddy bear. 

        I finally made it back to my apartment, just about ready to burst into tears since I was so happy to be home. 

        Home? Can I call it that after all that's happened? I basically just committed domestic abuse today at work without Yuri even knowing of this! 

        I climbed up the apartment stairs and made it to mine and Yuri's apartment, knocking on the door since Yuri has the only key (it's a work in progress for Yuri to get me a key). Yuri opened the door with an angry expression before it faded once seeing me.

        "Hey, what happened to your nose and face?" Yuri questioned. "And why are you so late?"

        "I worked with Donnie today on listening to bugged rooms, then did this extremely long interrogation and the bastard landed a few punches!" I huffed, gritting my teeth.

        "Are you okay? You should really lay down." Yuri spoke. "And what's with the bear and flowers?"

        "For you." I mumbled, adverting my eyes. "Donnie told me about how today was his anniversary with his wife, and it made me realize we never had a honeymoon or anything, for our real or fake relationship... so... I wanted to give you something so...you know...I care..." I muttered. 

        Yuri smiled, walking towards me as he took my gifts and set it down. I looked up at him, confused on what he was doing. 

        "I don't need you to spend money on me for me to know you care. Just you being by my side is enough for me." Yuri spoke, raising his arm and patting my head. 

        I smiled, ignoring the tears welling up in my eyes as I gave him a hug, completely forgetting about his wounds.

        "Ow! Ow!" he exclaimed.

        "Oh! Sorry!" I spoke, about to let go before he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me in further. 

        "No! The pain is worth it!" he spoke through tears as I laughed. "What are you crying for anyways?" he smiled.

        "Listen, been a long time since I've had genuine love directed towards me." I huffed. 

        "I'll make it my life-long mission to make sure you're always loved!" Yuri declared confidently. 

        "By the way, I won't be cooking tonight. Today's been so long with how that damn brat broke my nose and fractured my jaw." I huffed.

        "So your jaw is injured too?" Yuri sighed. "I picked up some store soup for me since it'll be a while for me to see solid foods; you can have some."

        "What happened?" I questioned.

        "It's a long story..." Yuri huffed, resting his head on top of mine.

        Earlier, he said that just me being by his side was enough, but, I'm not truly by his side in this case... am I?

        Yuri Briar, I'm terribly sorry, but I don't think I could ever be the perfect Mrs. Briar for you. I'm Vixen, the West Spy after all. I've never failed a mission yet and I doubt I'd fail this one too just because of some measly feelings I harbor.

        Parts: One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, current part, ten (to be continued when Spy x Family has more Yuri content!)

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