#THE TAIL DUDE IS SOOOO GOOD……

[dawnleaf37]

Sry I got late to this lmao but

BANHAMMER >:]

I can't believe I found someone that likes him as much, or more than I do lol

OHHHH MY GOGGGGG HES SO PRETTY THE CREATURED …… YES YESVYES YES YES YES !!!!!!

[twistedpink]

ur jealous! ace post was so yummy!!! idk if you did this already, but could you do a jealous! idia one?

omg yesss

Jealous!Idia categorizes himself as “the most teenage girl of all time”.. even he knows how often/intensely he gets jealous, and he hates it! What if because he’s talking so much about this other guy you run into some rando’s arms??

Jealous!Idia’s had Ortho tail you at school for months now, and that’s to say nothing of the surveillance he has on you :) He swears it’s not anything creepy though!! You can definitely tell whenever he’s been on a school camera binge because he’s usually pretty stand-offish (watching you means watching you with guys, and watching you with guys freaks him out!!)

Jealous!Idia’s master plan is to plant seeds, and he is not good at it. He’s tried soooo hard to get “threatening” guys off your roster (which is a lot of them, but mostly “lawful good types” and those with high standing), but if his goal’s to separate the two of you and he’s thought about it a lot, it comes out as something like “hey.. uh I heard this guy’s a massive creep, yeah! He sits in his room all day watching footage of you, what a loser!! Haha,,,”

When you call him out Idia gets so jealous it feels like he’ll explode!! (“Ugh you wouldn’t have said that to him, wouldya?”) The best way to resolve it is talking him through your thoughts when whatever riled him up happened, but you guys really need to get better at communication :(

A cute date idea’s taking jealous!Idia out to school after hours and doing live action remakes of the school shenanigans he wants to do with you irl, or how he’s coaching you to respond to advances (both get played up to the max) “c’mon Idia, open wide! I made that guy who was following me around buy me lunch, and I’m gonna feed it to youuuu” “dude, cooties!! Should’ve pushed him into his cauldron tho, lol”

Overall he’s super jealous but wants his feelings addressed, not fluffed off. If you guys were any worse at resolving your issues somebody’s getting set on fire (clue: it’s not either of you). Maybe this can be used as an excuse for him to get out more! Who’s better at warding off sweats than your big bad watchman?? (Maybe his mecha but it’s the thought that counts)

[crystalic-ender]

Random Sonadow boom fanfic

On this episode, Team Sonic is seen eating at Meh burger. 

“Well, this is nice!”

Amy cheered. And she was Right, it has been nice.

Eggman hadn’t attacked for a few days, and it was overall a nice, sunny day, so it's been relaxing, although, in Sonic’s opinion, a bit boring.

Tails hummed and nodded; “Yeah! It’s been great! I’ve made so many improvements on different inventions and on the tornado!”

”I don’t trust it! He’s waiting for us to be off guard, and then when we’re least expecting it, WOOSH! Turns out, hes been working with aliens to take over the planet, and the alien invasion would start!-“

”I seriously doubt Eggman holds enough likable energy to even talk to one on good terms, let alone convince them to join him.”

Sonic interrupted Sticks' chant. Sticks immediately stood up.

”THAT'S WHAT HE WANTS YOU TO THINK!”

Everyone sighed at Stick’s shenanigans. Before another word could be spoken—

“Ha! Look at the idiotic rodents, cheerfully eating lunch! Not for long~!”

Ugh. Eggman. Everyone looked over as he released Some more crab bots. Sonic rolled his eyes as he stood up and destroyed one.

”Really, Egghead? Just haaaad to show up now? We were enjoying a meal without you.”

Sonic rolled his eyes. 

“Yeah! We were doing just fine with our cardboard made edibles without you here!”

Knuckles yelled out. Eggman laughed.

”Well, your cardboard is about to be recycled! Robots, attack!!!”

Eggman yelled as his minions went out to attack. Sonic scoffed as they all went into position. However, before they could even start fighting, a yellow streak went past, destroying 5 badniks that were in a line.

Sonic and his friends blinked and looked over to see Shadow, holding up wires of some of the badniks. Eggman gasped.

”S-Shadow!? I had no idea you’d be here-“

”Leave. Now.”

Shadow glared at Eggman.

”I was planning to buy some things today and dealing with the ruckus you were about to make is not on my list, so leave.”

Eggman gulped.

”Y-Yeah! Of course-uh-Shadow! Oh! By the way, we’re having a dinner this Friday at 8, was hoping you’d come around-“

”I will not attend.”

“Right, of course—well, bye!”

With that, Eggman went off, his robots retreating. Shadow sighed in annoyance while Team Sonic stared at Shadow in confusion.

Sticks growled and got into a fighting position. Sonic sighed.

”Soooo you're here, edgelord? What are you doing here this time? A fight again? Dude, I’m not in the mood to—“

”Silence, fool! I’m not here for you or any of your insignificant friends! I had already stated I am here to buy a few things.”

Shadow scoffed and crossed His arms in the Normal stance they nearly always saw him in. Sonic sighed. Seriously, what was with this guy? They rarely see him around. And since when did Shadow ever shop in hedgehog village? Would have thought he would buy stuff somewhere with more high quality things.

”If that’s the case, why did you ’help’ us?”

Amy asked, tilting her head a little bit.

Shadow growled and rolled his eyes, his ears lowering in a bit of annoyance.

”Don’t mistake that for ‘helping’ you! I merely only did so because I don’t want to shop while hearing noise from the ruckus you and Robotnik was about to cause. If I’m going to shop in this pathetic town, I at least want silence and to be unbothered.”

Shadow said strictly as he then began turning around. Sonic ran over to him. Normally, he wouldn’t even bother with shadow, heck, he would go back to eating. However, he ran over to Shadow (wasn’t that hard considering he wasn’t that far away), and stood in front of him, examining him.

’Wait, wait wait wait wait wait!”

Shadow groaned, his eyes rolling up in irritation before he looked back at Sonic, his ears twitching in annoyance.

”What is it now, hedgehog!?”

“I’ve NEVER seen you shop here before,”

Sonic said, poking Shadow’s side. Shadow stepped back, immediately looked even more irritated and Opened his mouth to yell-

“Yeah! How do we know you’re not going to implant some kind of mind control device when none of us are watching!? HOW DO WE KNOW YOUR NOT WORKING FOR ALIENS OR FOR THE GOVERNMENT!?!?”

Sticks shouted. Shadow growled.

”I work for no one! I am merely here just to shop, but if you so want to annoy me by your ridiculous claims, then I will gladly bring you all down to your place—“

”Hey now, we don't want a fight—Sticks stop that, we don’t want to cause anything.”

Tails said, chuckling nervously as Sticks looked to be ready to throw her boomerang. Tails quickly added on,

“Besides, if Shadow did want to do that, he would have done it by now! We barely see him!”

”Yeah, but that’s because he doesn’t get screen time.”

Sticks rebutted. Everyone muttered in agreement. Shadow rolled his eyes, growling, his ears going down in irritation. How dare they mention his near non-existent screen time!

”Enough of this, I’m leaving.”

”Hold on, we just want to know why you helped us.”

Knuckles said.

”Normally you just come and beat us up. And we want an answer!….woah, did I just remember what we were asking him previously?! Maybe my memory is getting better!”

Knuckles said in excitement before Shadow immediately glared at him.

“No, it's clearly getting worse since I already said I didn’t help you. I wanted to shop in peace, so I tore up Eggman’s robots and told him to leave and he went. That's it.” 

“Oh.”

Knuckles said in a deadpan voice. Shadow then went to get around Sonic. However, Sonic thought before quickly asking

“Why did Eggman listen to you anyways?”

”…Huh?”

”Why did Eggman listen to ya? I mean, sure, he finds you cool or whatever, but I doubt that’s the whole reason.”

Sonic clarified, placing his hands on his hips. Shadow glared at Sonic.

“I have no need to explain myself to you, hedgehog.”

”Come onnnn~, just say why and we’ll get out of your hair.”

Sonic snickered, determined to get his answer. Knuckles nodded and stepped forward.

”yeah, else we’ll decide that there’s something going on—“

”Like you two teaming up to give our locations to government agents!”

Sticks yelled, pointing at Shadow.

”THAT’S RIGHT, WE’RE ONTO YOU!”

Shadow scoffed, eyes narrowing in annoyance

”Ugh! Fine! If it gets you all to leave me alone without a fight…not that I couldn’t take you down. Just not in the mood too.”

Shadow scoffed. Sonic perked up and blinked.

”Wow, really? I thought you were always in the mood to fight.”

”It’s for plot convenience, Sonic. They took away my desire to fight for now. Not that it’ll last for long, but it's annoying.”

”Well, thank goodness for the author. I wasn’t in the mood to Fight. Now tell us!”

Sonic said with a smirk, placing his hands on his hips with a stuff-eating grin. Shadow rolled his eyes.

”Ugh. Fine. Me and Eggman are…related—“

“WHAT!?”

Team Sonic yelled out together. Sticks immediately threw down her boomerang and pointed at Eggman.

”I TOLD YOU EGGMAN WAS AN ALIEN! AND NOW WE KNOW HE’S RELATED TO AN ALIEN!”

”We all know Eggman’s human, and I doubt Shadow’s an alien, so let's not think of that.”

”THAT'S WHAT HE WANTS YOU THINK, AMY! THAT'S WHAT HE WANTS YOU TO THINK!”

They then decided to ignore Sticks.

Knuckles paused, looking confused

”…so…Eggman’s a hedgehog?”

“No, you ignorant buffoon!”

Shadow scoffed, growling in annoyance.

”I was admitted into his family, hence I’m…a part of his family. My last name is still Robotnik, so…”

”Wow…you're adopted?”

Sonic snickered. Shadow growled, his ears pinning down in frustration, maybe even a bit of embarrassment.

”Shut it, hedgehog!”

”Never!”

“So, what ‘family’ role do you play for Eggman?”

Tails curiously asked, stepping forward. Shadow took a Deep breath.

”…it could be ‘cousin���, however a more accurate one would be his uncle.”

Team Sonic paused. His uncle? Isn’t Shadow, like, Sonic’s age?

Sonic hummed.

”Uncle? Aren’t you, like, the same age as me?“

”I am.”

”…Then how are you Eggman’s uncle?”

Sonic asked, staring at Shadow with squinting eyes. Tails sighed

”Sonic, younger kids can be adopted by old people. If he was adopted by Eggman’s grandfather, then it would make him Eggman’s uncle.”

Tails explained. Shadow hummed…it wasn’t what happened, but it was more complicated if he said the truth, not like they ever need to know the truth. Knuckles looked to the sky

”Oh yeah! That makes way more sense than time travel!”

Knuckles said aloud. Amy looked at him with confusion on her face

”Where did you get time travel from?”

”I thought he was from the past and came here.”

Shadow hummed at Knuckles statement. Not entirely wrong, but…

”Wait! So, you’re Eggman’s uncle? Is that why he listens to you?”

Tails asked. Shadow raised a brow

”Yes, I just said that.”

”Just wanted to clarify it. So…is that the only reason he listens and wants you to join him? Because your family?”

Tails asked. Shadow groaned. This was taking WAY longer than he wanted, however plot convince made him want to explain, so he talked

”Although I’m sure it's part of it, it's also because he finds me cool and amazing, as he should. He believes I am very strong and can help him. He also referred to me as the….’cool uncle’ at some point, whatever that means.”

”You? The ‘cool uncle’? Puh-lease! I doubt you could ever be that cool!”

Sonic rolled his eyes. Shadow growled, crossing his arms with a glare.

”Way cooler than you, I can assure. Unfortunately, that ‘coolness’ is what motivates him to always bother me when I want to be left alone!”

Shadow huffed. Sonic hummed and seemed to think for a bit before he smirked

”Sooooo~, if you're Egghead’s uncle, does that mean whoever you date would be his step uncle?”

Shadow blinked, unsure of where this was going.

”…I suppose.”

”Annnnnnd by definition, It would mean he would have to Listen to them? For family’s sake?”

”I guess? Where are you going with—“

”Date me.”

….

Silence was all that was heard. The rest of team Sonic stared at Sonic with shocked (Tails had a mix of disgust in there) faces. Sonic just held his smirk.

When Shadow finally processed it, he blushed before punching Sonic. FINALLY! He has escaped plot convenience!

“Ack-!”, Sonic yelped as he tumbled and fell to the ground. Shadow growled, his ears down in embarrassment as he glared at Sonic, his arms in a position as if he was about to send another punch to Sonic.

”What!? What the hell!?”

Shadow yelled.

”Are we allowed to say that?” called Knuckles in the distance.

Sonic, stubborn as ever, just stood up with a smirk.

”Hey! Hear me out—“

Sonic managed to block an oncoming punch from Shadow

”Ack-C’mon! Just for a week!”

”Why would I—“

”To mess with Egghead! If I became your ‘boyfriend’, then he would have to listen to me! And that would be HILARIOUS!”

”Why would I ever—“

”Who knows, maybe he’ll be soooo angry with you afterwards, he’ll leave you alone for a while!”

“…”

Shadow paused. Annoy….Eggman? Admittedly, he never thought of doing something Eggman hated to get him to leave Shadow alone, and dating Eggman’s arch-nemesis, someone who Shadow ALSO hated, seemed a bit far-fetched…however, it might give him the peace and quiet he had been hoping for for so long….

Shadow hummed, pausing, stepping his foot up and down, his hand on his chin. 

Sonic blinked. Wait, was he actually thinking about—

“Deal.”

There was a silence that followed afterwards. Sonic blinked slowly, processing the fact that Shadow had ACTUALLY agreed. He kinda just expected to get thrown into the store across the street.

Amy looked shocked, yet a bit of hurt and jealousy was on her face. Knuckles looked confused (per usual), Tails was staring back and forth between Sonic and Shadow, as if both surprised that Shadow actually accepted and disgusted with Sonic for even suggesting it. 

Sticks broke the silence a moment later.

”That is an imposter! Shadow would NEVER agree to date someone like Sonic!”

She shouted. Sonic scoffed and crossed his arms, slightly insulted.

”Rude…”

”How DARE you even try to Insinuate that I am a fake. I am the Shadow, the ultimate life form, not some imposter impersonating myself, when there is no need since I am ALL of me! And for your information, I’m not dating him because I like him. Who could like this fool who can’t even make a simple shelf!”

Sonic’s ears went down in irritation at Shadow’s insult.

“Double rude.”

”The only reason I am agreeing is simply because I want a break from Ivo pestering me. Perhaps if I…’date’ his worst enemy for a short time, he’ll try to avoid me. That is all.”

Shadow stated, crossing his arms. Sonic lightly rolled his eyes. Shadow hummed, satisfied with the silence, so he turned around and began walking away

”Now, I will go back to shopping, as you fools have wasted enough of my time.”

Shadow walked towards a building. Sonic rolled his eyes, grumbling

”See ya Tomorrow, ‘babe’.”

”You are not calling me that.”

…….

The next day, while team sonic was returning to meh burger (again, because where else are they supposed to eat?), Sonic noticed a certain hedgehog who happened to be standing there. 

Shadow was standing in front of the mini stairs to meh burger, crossing his arms and standing still. Sonic blinked, running over, stopping in front of him with a curious blank expression, looking Shadow up and down.

”…You actually came?”

”What makes you think I would stand out here for you?”

”Because I doubt you’d eat at Meh burger.”

”….Tch.”

Shadow looked away, annoyed.

”If you want to know, I’m here to wait for Eggman.”

”Huh-Why?”

”He attacks everyday and I was going to tell him that we’re dating…it’s good you showed up. Makes it more believable.”

“…So in other words, you WERE waiting for me.”

”No.”

Before Sonic could respond, Eggman flew in.

”Ha! Prepare yourself, rodents, for my brand new—shadow? Uhhhh….what are you doing here? This is like, the second day you’ve appeared. You normally only get one day.”

Eggman said, looking confused. Shadow looked up at Eggman with his normal scowl.

“About time you showed up, Eggman. I have important news to Share With you.“

”Oh! Important news? From you!? Of course! What is it?”

Eggman asked. Obviously, he thought it was something around the aspect of Shadow thinking about joining him. Shadow took a deep breath.

”Now…It may be hard for you to hear this but—“

”Wait—Are you joining Sonic’s team!?“

”Wha—No! I would never join that pathetic group of unbearable peasants!”

Shadow growled at Eggman’s immediate assumption. Team Sonic looked at Shadow with a glare.

‘Good job at acting like we’re dating.’, Sonic thought as he rolled his eyes. Eggman seemed to sigh of relief.

“Oh thank God! I Was about to have a panic attack! Well then, what is it?”

Shadow took a deep breath.

”I…Sonic and I….well…”

Shadow began but couldn’t seem to finish it. As if even saying it was too much. Shadow took a deep breath, preparing himself to tell Eggman the news when he felt a hand wrap around his waist. Shadow ears lowered and he turned to see Sonic, who had put his hand on Shadow in a nonchalant manner. Shadow was about to punch him but—

“Me and Shads are in a relationship.”

Sonic said in a smug voice. Shadow blinked as he reminded himself he had to pretend to date this hedgehog. Shadow looked down at Sonic’s hand before looking back up to Eggman, who’s face was shocked. 

“WHAT!? You mean to tell me that you two are-“

”living the good life? Yeah~, we are~”

Sonic snickered. Eggman glared at Sonic before paying his attention towards Shadow.

”Shadow, is this true!?”

“….yes—“

”Wha-but I thought you hated Sonic too!”

Eggman yelled with an accusatory voice. Shadow shrugged.

”fifty-fifty.”

”Fifty-fift—I Can’t believe this!”

Eggman shouted. Sonic snickered.

”Well, you better start, Eggman! Since I’m your new step-uncle!”

Urbot and Cubot gasped while Eggman looked offended.

”Wait-who told you that!?”

”Who else?”

Sonic smirked and motioned to Shadow. Shadow let out a sigh. Eggman growled.

”Shadowwww! Why would you tell him!?”

”Hmph.”

”…Well, it doesn't matter! Afterall, you only become related to me at marriage, which I doubt you two are at that stage, so HA!”

Eggman laughed as he pointed at Sonic. Sonic hummed, putting his free hand on his chin as if thinking, before looking to Shadow with a smug smirk.

“How about we let your dear ‘uncle’ decide that~”

Shadow rolled his eyes, his arms still crossed over his chest. He looked to Sonic’s smug face, then to Eggman’s pleading one. Shadow looked to Sonic and then back to Eggman. Then back to Sonic. Then to Eggman.

”….Yes, he’s your step-uncle.”

”WHAT!?”

”HA! In your face, Eggman!”

Sonic snickered and pointed to Eggman. Eggman growled.

”I-you—“

”That means I’m in charge!”

”What-no it doesn’t!? I’ll destroy—“

”Listen to your uncle, Ivo.”

Shadow interrupted. Amy, Knuckles, Tails and Sticks collectively gasped at Shadow’s words. Sonic paused, then looked to Shadow. He was joining in with this!? And here Sonic thought he’d have to do it all.

Eggman looked shocked and somewhat betrayed.

”What—but he isn’t—“

”Ivo.”

Shadow glared at Eggman, giving him a typical ‘do I look like I’m kidding’ face. Eggman gulped before he sulked into his chair.

”Yes Shadow…”

”Good. By the way, we’re coming to that family dinner on Friday.”

Shadow stated with a factual voice. Sonic blinked. Wow, he was really going in full on this.

Eggman stared before standing up again

”WHAT DO YOU MEAN ’WE’RE’!?”

”I said what I mean, Ivo. Sonic is invited since he is also your uncle.”

”Wha-but he—“

”Ivo.”

Shadow glared once more. Eggman growled before sighing and sitting back to sulk in his flying seat.

”Yes Shadow…”

”Good. Don’t make me regret deciding to come. Now get out of my—…I mean, OUR sights.”

Shadow demanded. Eggman sighed.

”…Minions, retreat…”

And with that, Eggman disappeared. As soon as Eggman left, Sonic burst out laughing, falling onto the floor.

”Hahaha! Oh my—oh my gosh! Ahahahaha!!! He totally fell for it!”

Sonic then got up and looked to Shadow

”I’m surprised you joined in with it! I thought I would have had to do all the talking!”

”Be fortunate I joined in, hedgehog. Otherwise, you could not have convinced him.”

Shadow stated, looking away with an annoyed expression. Sonic just snickered. Tails ran over and looked to Sonic, joining the conversation

”It seems like it worked! Though, now you have to attend a family Dinner on Friday.”

Sonic slowly looked to Tails, as if realizing he was supposed to go to a dinner event with Eggman.

”….”

Sonic then looked to Shadow

”REALLY!? Did you HAVE to accept the invite!”

Shadow raised an eye at Sonic’s shouting, looking confused.

”…I thought it would elevate that we were dating, as going to a family dinner and introducing you as ‘my boyfriend’, is a relatively important thing to do, so I thought it would have convinced Ivo that we were dating.”

Shadow explained. Sonic groaned, his ears and tail drooping in annoyance

”Yeah but—but now I actually have to go to an event—an event with EGGMAN!”

”It's not like it's too important. It’s just a family dinner.”

”Yeah, but have you ever BEEN to one of those!?”

”….Yes…?”

”….Right, but STILL!!!”

Sonic complained as he yelled. Shadow rolled his eyes.

”You are such an over dramatic child. It’s not that bad.”

”Is it!? IS IT REALLY!?”

Sonic yelled. Shadow narrowed his eyes, about to escalate things when Amy stormed over

“Sonic, it was YOUR idea to do this to prank Eggman! The least you can do is follow through! And besides, Shadow is putting aside his hatred of attending Eggman’s events for you! You HAVE to do this!”

Amy commended, which just earned more groaning from Sonic.

”Ughhh! Fiiiineeeee!”

Sonic huffed. Amy smiled.

”Good! Now why don’t we find some suitable clothes for this?”

“Wha—its just a family dinner! It’s not like its anything fancy.”

Sonic crossed his arms and looked away. It earned a scoff from Shadow, who walked over.

”It may not be anything fancy, but I swear if you don’t wear at least a jacket, I’ll kill you.”

”Wha-really? You actually care about this stuff?”

”yes. Be fortunate I’m not forcing you to wear pants.”

Sonic sighed. This was horrible….he was thankful that he didn’t have to wear pants though.

Shadow glared at Sonic.

“You better meet me here when it’s time.”

“Yeah yeah…”

Sonic sighed as Shadow teleported away.

…………

Yeah, it was supposed to be longer but I lacked motivation to continue it so here it is.

[beefscrap]

I'll have you know that whenever I think of Sheep, he just looks like this

Like an old, but well-loved, stuffed animal

Beanie Babie core

Omg.. omg

Was Jumping for joy when I opened this. He looks soooo adorable omggUAUHGH 😭😭 he really does look like a sweet little beanie baby. Such a cute, clean style for him!!! Like the line art and coloring is sooo smooth - I always say I love sketchy stuff but i really do love styles like this!! Im like finding it hard to make words i seriously love this - That sounds like it’s the opposite BUT I SWEARRR this is what happens. His stretched eyes are so funny LIKE THE ONE COMING OF THE SIDE HELPPPpp. His teeth look so adorable (try not to point his teeth out challenge failed) and I love his barbels coming off his face like that!! His claws ARE SO SILLYY his little paws look so soft omg. This might sound odd but the way you did his tail/tail fins look so good?? Super satisfying.. I can’t explain ugh. His lil chibi wings also look amazinggg like this whole style man AUG!! Also. Colored line art is fantastic and (again) so clean. I’m so baffled to get fullbody fully-colored drawings like this dude….. TYSMMM UGH!!!

[wh0re43van]

You are great writer! Stumbled on that on set Evan fic and it was soooo good 🔥 Lol, I actually do work on set and you really captured the atmosphere tbh. Keep it up!

Not sure if you’re open to requests rn, but I would love your take on Evan and his partner trying to make a baby for the first time. He just seems so sweet and I’d love to think of this man in a happy marriage, daydreaming about little feet running around.

Thank you so much! I truly appreciate your kind words <33

So, I decided to make this two parts. This first part is just fluff, the readers get to see Evan in kind of a paternal role in this part, baby making will be in the next, I hope you enjoy!

Also ngl, I had this done for a couple of days now, I just couldn’t think of a title :/ so sorry about that. I’m awful with titles smh

Baby fever (Evan Peters X Reader) Pt. 1

Summary: While babysitting for Evans brother, you realize that you’re finally ready to have a baby, much to your husbands delight.

Word count: 2.2k

Warnings: none in this part ;)

Pt2 Pt3

“Thank you again, I know it’s a bit short notice, “ Evans brother, Andrew, says as he closes the door behind him to step out onto the dim front porch with Evan, his daughter Ellie, and myself.

“Dude, It’s no problem really!” Even smiles, laying a gentle hand on his brother’s shoulder. “It’s always a joy having Ellie around,” he grunts as he picks up her small ‘Peppa Pig’ suitcase and her car seat.

“Yeah, Dad! They love me!” Ellie giggles as she grabs onto my arm. I smile at her snaggle toothed grin. The yellow light of the porch reflecting off her dark hair, making her curly pig tails look golden.

“They’re right Andrew,” I reiterate as we all begin to walk to Evans car, Ellie’s small hand in mine while the crickets chirp their evening song. “Now you go inside and help the Mrs. pack for your..uh.. trip. We’ve got it from here, “ I give Andrew a sympathetic smile, taking Ellie’s sippy cup out of his hand.

Andrews wife’s mother has been rushed to the hospital just a few hours ago and the couple is driving through the night to be there with her. They haven’t told Ellie the reason for the trip, all she knows is that she’s spending the weekend with Auntie y/n and Uncle Evan.

“Be sure to call me if you need anything or if Ellie just wants to talk, bye sweetie,” Andrew picks up his daughter, giving her kiss on the head.

“I love you daddy,” she giggles hugging him back quickly before trying to escape his embrace. “Let me down! I wanna go to Uncle Evans!” She Kicks her small light up sneakers, flashes of purple and red glow on the concrete as her feet hit the ground. Andrew just laughs. Thanking us again before making his way inside.

“Give me the suitcase babe, I’ll throw it in the back,” I take the pink bag out of Evans arms, walking to the trunk to toss it in.

I make my way around the vehicle to see Evan bent over struggling to get the carseat hooked in as Ellie hangs on his leg, both of them erupting in giggles.

“Ellie I can’t get this carseat in with you climbing all over me like that,” he laughs as he pulls at the locked seatbelt, trying to free it so he can stretch it through the back of the child’s seat. Ellie continues as if she hasn’t heard him, and Evan lets her. I smile at the pure joy beaming from my husband. He loves children dearly; his niece is no exception of course. He’s brought up starting a family of our own many times in the few years we’ve been married, I’ve just never felt quite ready with how much time away his job requires, but now things are slowing down and the idea of having a baby grows on me more every day.

“Now Ellie, how will we ever make it to our house if you don’t let Uncle Evan buckle your seat in?” I ask, giving her a stern look. She considers my statement, then reluctantly trudges over to me, leaning on my leg.

“Oh okay,” she frowns, looking up at me with her big hazel eyes.

“Done! … I think.” Evan exclaims, backing away from the vehicle. I stifle a laugh when I see the crooked car seat that he is ever so proud of. I simply walk up and adjust it before plopping Ellie in the seat and strap her in. Finally, we can go home.

•

•

After arriving home, we bring Ellie’s bag in to the room that she’ll be sleeping in, I take her down to the kitchen as Evan goes to change into some sleepwear. It’s a bit late, 7:00 pm and the sun’s already set for the night, but we’ve been informed that Ellie hasn’t had supper yet.

“Okay so you want a grilled cheese, we can do that, but you need to have a veggie as well,” I pick up Ellie and set her on the dining chair. She’s expressed that she wants a grilled cheese and only a grilled cheese. She even briefly tried to convince me that she’s allergic to all vegetables. “We have broccoli,” I pull a head of broccoli out of the fridge and set it on the table.

“Yuck!” The small girl rolls her tired eyes.

“Carrots,” I grab a bunch of fresh carrots, placing them in front of her.

“No way!” She shoves them away from her. I huff.

“Or we have green beans,” I reach into the pantry and set a jar of green beans next to the other veggies.

“Aunt y/n, you’re crazy. No thank you to all of them. Just a grilled cheese please,” she says in disgust, reaching for the bag of bread and block of cheese, sliding the ingredients closer to me.

“Ellie-“ I sigh, admittedly losing some patience.

“Oh wow look at all these super veggies that Aunt y/n has laid out for you. You’re lucky, she’s giving you the special ones,” Evan says coming around the corner, now in his pajamas, as he takes a seat next to his niece.

“What do you mean?” She inquires, raising a small eyebrow.

“Oh she didn’t tell you?” He gasps, shifting his gaze to wink at me. I stifle a laugh.

“These carrots,” he pulls the bunch to him. “They give you night vision.” He explains. Ellie considers his claim.

“What about this one,” she hands him the head of broccoli.

“Oh this? It just gives you super speed, no big deal I guess if you don’t want to be the next quicksilver,” he says nonchalantly, tossing the head of broccoli in between his hands. Ellie gasps, her eyes light up.

“I want this one!” She grabs the green veggie and hands it to me. “Please.” She adds, remembering her manners. I laugh.

“Don’t you want to hear about the green beans?” Evens asks, standing up from his seat.

“No thank you. Super speed please!” She crosses her hands on the table, awaiting her superpowers. Evan takes the broccoli from my grasp, turning to grab a cutting board.

“I got it honey, go upstairs and get ready for bed,” he kisses my forehead. I smile and thank him before making my way to our bedroom.

•

•

I change into some comfy pajamas and do my nightly routine of skincare and brushing my teeth before padding down the steps. Before I peak my head around the corner I hear Evan shout,

“One more time… GO!” followed by the quick stomping of tiny feet. I clear the corner to see the furniture pushed out of the way and Ellie hurtling full speed towards me. She runs right into my stomach, nearly knocking the wind out of me.

“Jesus,” I wheeze. Ellie giggles boisterously with a toothless smile.

“I’m sorry Auntie y/n,” she manages to choke out as she falls to the ground in her fit of laughter. I look to my husband with wide eyes, trying to process what happened.

“Hey don’t look at me babe, it was the supper broccoli. Hopefully it will wear off soon,” he says genuinely, putting his hands up in defense. I can’t help but laugh.

I take a moment to admire the sight of my husband standing in his sweatpants and old stained shirt draped loosely on his toned body. His beautiful brown curls that are just a bit overdue for a trim sticking out every which way, yet resting perfectly on his soft features, and his scruff filling in more and more every day that he’s doesn’t shave. The gorgeous man in front of me, smiling from ear to ear with the purest of joy in his chocolate eyes makes my heart sing. He’s truly in his element right now. The elation coming from Ellie and Evan is contagious, I find myself in a fit of laughter as well as Ellie crawls up my legs and onto my back.

“Your turn to race Auntie y/n!” She cheers.

“No, no not tonight honey,” I disappoint her with my response.

“We have to clean up and get you ready for bed,” I walk over to Evan, passing the girl on my back into his grasp. “Which will be Uncle Evans job since he’s the one that wound you up,” I raise my eye brows at him. Ellie happily rests in his arms bridal style, her gummy grin never leaving her face.

“Hey, don’t give me that look,” he begins to walk towards the steps. “You’re the one that gave Ellie speed enhancing veggies,” he reminds me, almost fooling me as well, with how serious his tone and expression are.

I roll my eyes as I turn to put our living room back together.

‘You’d think Evan would know not have a 6 year old run laps around the house half an hour before bedtime.’ I sigh as I push our couch back into place. As irritated as I want to be, I can’t help but feel giddy. Seeing how happy Evan is with Ellie makes my heart swell with joy.  

‘Maybe I will discuss having a baby with him.’ I think to myself as I replace our rug and coffee table back into the center of the room.

‘But having a child isn’t always fun. It’s much different having your own child than babysitting.’ I make note to remind him as I shove our recliner back to its designated spot.

‘And pregnancy can be complicated’ I’ll have to tell him. ‘I hope mine won’t be, but it is something you have to prepare for’ I’ll explain. He’s not the one getting pregnant so I know this may not be something he’ll consider.

I make my way to the kitchen to begin stacking the dishwasher with what little dishes Evan left in the sink before he went to destroying our living room.

‘And what will we do if you get a big job and have to fly halfway across the country while I’m in labor or freshly postpartum?’ I’ll be sure to ask. I begin to make myself nervous considering all my concerns.

‘And what if-‘

“She’s laying down,” Evans comforting voice breaks me from my thoughts. I can hear the smile as he speaks. I don’t even need to look up. “Once I finally convinced her that there is no goblin living in our guest room closet, she crawled right in bed,” his voice gets closer as he moves to wrap his strong arms around my waist, I lean back to rest my head on his shoulder, taking in his familiar scent. I turn to look up at him. I don’t know how his dimples haven’t popped right off his face from how much he’s been smiling this evening.

“Let’s have a baby,” I blurt out, looking into the pure joy glinting in his eyes. The joy turns to shock. He grabs my shoulders, spinning me around so he can search my eyes for any hint of joking. There isn’t any.

“Are you serious y/n?” He asks. The smile now just his jaw dropped to the floor, his eyes wide and his eyebrows raised so high that they’re hidden behind his curls. I chuckle at his reaction, my chest warming at how excited that one sentence has made him.

“Yes,” I simply answer. He matches my smile, pulling me into his chest so tight it almost hurts, but I don’t say anything.

“I want nothing more than that y/n,” he mumbles to the crook of my neck. I wiggle out of his grip enough to meet his gaze, seeing his mahogany eyes glistening. He blinks and a single tear threatens to escape though his long lashes. He reaches a hand up quickly to wipe the happiness attempting to leak from his eye.

“Let’s do it,” I grin. Every doubt, every concern, flying quickly out of my mind. The speech I was going to give him about the dangers and responsibilities of childbearing now long gone after seeing how happy the idea of us having our very own bundle of joy is making Evan.

“I love you so much y/n Peters,” he pulls me into a soft kiss, his lips warm against mine. I reach my hands up to bury my fingers in his curls.

“And I love you Evan Peters,” I smile against his lips. Though this kiss is gentle, but it is easily the most intimate kiss we’ve had. I can feel the adoration with every breath that fans over my face. “I think we should try as soon as Ellie goes home,” I suggest, pulling away from the kiss, resting my forehead on his.

“You wouldn’t reckon my brothers on his way home now, would you?” He jokes as he reaches down to grab my hands. Running his thumbs over my knuckles.

“I’m not even sure they’re out of the state yet Ev,” I smile at my husband. He brings both my hands up to his mouth, kissing each one gently.

“I suppose I can wait,” he sighs. I giggle, grabbing his arm to guide him to our room.

“Let’s check on Ellie one more time, then we can head to bed ourselves,” I whisper as we walk towards the guest room.

“You seriously expect me to be able to sleep, Honey? I feel like a kid on Christmas Eve night,” he flashes his dimples, I roll my eyes and smile at his excitement.

[shotmrmiller]

nobody notices until bub asks why his skeleton has a front tail 😂

ghost being the dad who likes to leave his brain at work and is about to correct her and reader has to shove her fingers in his mouth to keep him quiet (cuz she can't slap a hand over it, he's too tall) and she has to say that bub's soooo right it's a tail good eye dude~ while simon's licking at her fingers.

[patentedsun]

Rapid fire Fairy Tail rewatch thoughts. May or May not expand upon each point later on.

THIS IS LONG AS HELL BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW WHEN TO SHUT UP.

for reference, I've reached tartaros so far. I am aware of the canon happenings after that tho.

The female cast is so good idc what anyone says obviously the fanservice is awful BUT I will say, in the earlier arcs, it actually felt decently balanced because of Gray's whole stripping shtick + Natsu's cunty vest wasn't particularly modest either LOL.

Erza is such a wonderful character. I've seen comments that she goes downhill like 100yq onwards but. Um. 100yq characterisation.... that's a whole post of its own.

I never expected to like Lucy so much. idc that it takes her like 200 episodes to win a fight solo because when she FINALLY DOES IT WAS THE BEST MOMENT OF THE SERIES BY FAR. characters who's defining traits r kindness and compassion <33

Interesting how Lucy is the traditional shounen protag (underdog, skills develop overtime) because the rest of team Natsu sans Wendy were all like ... already kinda OP established mages even at the beginning.

I know there are debates ab who really is the protag and imo the narrative skews towards Natsu more BUT. it's bizarre how unexplored he is for a main character. Like yes he is my favourite character other than Lucy but his inner psyche is barely explored it's so weird. He doesn't really have a character arc either??? I'll expand on this more once I finish post tartaros (lolll not looking forward to that) and once again it seems like he's completely regressed from what I've seen of 100yq.

I fucking love all the ships.

I don't agree with comments that Natsu can't be traditionally romantic. Like, I definitely don't think he would ever have the natural inclination to be that way as a part of his character on its own. BUT considering iconic rainbow sakura moment I fully believe he would do whatever it is that would make Lucy happy. And if that includes red roses and candlelit dinners he would absolutely try his best.

Nalu moments r seriously. so good.

I totally see why Juvia stans don't like gruvia. But unfortunately I like them. And I've slightly rewritten them in my head so that juvia doesn't get completely flanderized LOL.

the Natsu Erza Gray sibling relationship goes soooo hard.

Just in general there's something beautiful about the way Fairy Tail handles it's numerous platonic and romantic relationships. Nothing feels secondary yk. Everything is given its due time (except maybe NALU goddammit).

I LOVE THAT FEMALE CHARACTERS HAVE DEEP COMPLEX RELATIONSHIPS IRRELEVANT TO THE MALE CAST. Lucy and Levy, Lucy and Yukino, whatever combination between Erza Lucy Wendy, Lucy Flare, Wendy Shelia, Wendy Carla etc

Even when the relationship involves a man in some kind of way like eg Lucy Cana or Erza Kagura it's still not like... in a bad way. The friendship itself is still there, it's just that the inciting incident tends to involve a dude.

Speaking of Lucy having so many deep female friendships is a big reason why I like Nalu so much lol. Like I literally do not care ab ships in media but fairy tail.... just has that something...

Love how often everyone changes outfits.

This show desperately needed a mini arc somewhere with just Natsu Lucy Happy going on a low stake job, where Natsu actually opens up ab his emotions and his relationship with Igneel.

Needed more Natsu and Igneel flashbacks in general.

Wendy triple combo abandonment issues are not talked ab enough holy shit. Grandeeny, Mystogan and then her entire guild???!

Lucy's relationship with her dad was objectively so well written. I skipped starry skies arc sorry the pacing was destroying me so I can't speak on that. But everything else was just BEAUTIFUL.

The fact that she returns to him just to tell at him. The fact that he comes to her with money problems and she STILL stands her ground. The fact that it's HIM who has to better himself and earn HER forgiveness.

Even after it seems like they're on ok terms, Lucy mentions in tenrou that they don't keep in contact, which is soo... realistic...

and then his death... Shout-out to Natsu who actually is emotionally quite mature (as the author himself seems to have forgotten) and dealt with it wonderfully. He gave Lucy her space, he let her vent, he stopped Happy from interfering too much. + Lucy being conflicted ab it and clearly grieving what could have been instead of what was. sighhh. .

idc ab no deaths but I do wish they didn't do fake out deaths as often. Because when actual loss sticks, it's done super well imo. Ultear, Aquarius, I haven't hit this part yet but Igneel... (yes I'm ignoring 100yq)

the episodic fillers r INCREDIBLE.

Rogue and Frosch are so special to me.

Wish they expanded on Jellal and Meredy's relationship a bit more it seems quite wholesome.

I love Virgo.

Really hate the muted colours Ft2014 onwards, but I do like that Lucy's hair became blonde and not yellow.

Pacing 2014 onwards was GOD AWFUL. I WAS SO SAD because I think the story beats in eclipse arc is actually super good but it was DRAGGED OUT SO MUCH nothing had the impact it should've.

Snow fairy, FT, Masayume chasing you will never be forgotten.

Lucy underutilizes Gemini so much it drives me mad. They were terrifying under Angel so like... cmon...

idc what anyone says GMG and edolas were top tier.

Edolas Natsu X Edolas Lucy... yes

objectively speaking gajeel is a top tier character too

Someone pointed out that Natsu didn't reallyyy hang out with anyone other than Happy pre canon and it changed my life. Every time I notice him and Lucy casually hanging out now I start screaming.

HAPPY IS SUCH A GOOD CHARACTER IDC. His edolas character arc was incredible, his relationship with Lucy is just as (if not more) fleshed out as his one with Natsu and that's part of what makes them such a great trio.

Whenever he goes LUUSSHIEEE . my heart ...

OST top tier no notes

the writing was actually so tight up until GMG part 2

I generally don't care ab the powerscaling issues but laxus v jura... no.

The anime kinda fucks up his face a lot but manga Natsu was genuinely soooo adorable in every single panel (once again IGNORING 100YQ).

Wendy also great character arc.

Sting's whole design is SO GOOD and ten years too early. the fur lined vest, the crop top, the one dangly earring, the scar, the loose fitting pants, good God now that's a Look.

Seriously I love Nalu so much...

That's all for now folks. If you want me to expand upon anything just lmk bec believe it or not all of this is a summary.

[ii-evil-confessions]

ooc: [the yaouri allegations have literally taken over my brain i cannot goe ONE MINUTE without thinking "what if they kissed" im going to lose it im actually going to lose it. anyways heres more trivia because i love you guys]

because electrons usually hate their leg nubs, touching an electron's leg nub (and them letting you do so) is a sign of deep trust and affection!!!

electrons love to hoard things. especially shiny things that conduct electricity. electrical wire? gone. metal pipe? gone. your money in coins? gone.

speaking of money - atoms don't really have their own currency. sure, they DO have dollars and coins, but protons prefer to pay with favors and ious, neutrons don't care about how they have to pay, and electrons will mostly use money because paying with favors usually gets them into trouble.

electrons spark depending on their mood!!! happy? little zippy zaps! sad? barely any sparks! angry? you could power a small house for however long they stay angry! coughs in dont look at some of the very unethical power supplies some really nasty protons use

so yknow those thingies that those doctors rub together and they make electricity and they shock patients with it? yeah electrons can do that too

cats love boxesWHAT!!! WHO SAID THAT??

an electron's tail can pick up all sorts of stuff in the electromagnetic spectrum!!! they can send secret messages!!!! listen to music!!!! ECHOLOCATION!!!! i think (i am probably wrong)

an electron giving some one something from their hoard is like a big big sign of trust because its like "i trust you with this buddy pal this thingamabob is gonna be in good hands" *discreetly looks at ao3* cough cough umm i didnt do anything

electron tails are soooo bad at hiding emotions hahhah hahha haha hahahah hahahaaha

theyre FAST!!!!! ELECTRONS ARE FAST THEY ARE SPEEDY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! VROOM VROOM OR SOMETHING

yknow that thing where in wall-e him and eva shared a spark and its like "omg they loooove each other" giggles. yeah electrons can do that too. do you see what im getting at

im losing it

haha omg dude once electron starts purring it will have so much trouble stopping dude. like its gonna be like "oh fuck fuck shit" and i will laugh at it

when electrons sneeze they give off a little burst of electricity. sneeze? kaboom.

they can flashbang people because i thought that was funny

when electron and positron meet expect more lore to be revealed

cats love boxe-gets shot omg was that a ghost omggg

electron would totally read fanfiction. it would never admit it. but zap would absolutely read fanfiction

[im literally dying im melting im dying im dead. waaah]

[phantomphangphucker]

Phic Phight - One Sip And You’ll Understand, The Power That’s In Your Hands

For: @datawyrms @haloburns @shadowfaerieammy

So Danny has to deal with Pariah, right? And obliviously anyone would assume, especially the other ghosts, that Danny’s combative ass would ‘deal with’ Pariah by trying to beat his ass. Fair. Except here’s the thing, Pariah doesn’t know what coffee is, and Danny takes far more issues with that than the guy being a violent dick. Meaning, Pariah’s gonna learn that fools are worth their weight in liquid gold (coffee).

:Chap. 1:

Maybe You And I Can Make A Deal

“It was many years ago. Before you. Before me. Before most of us. His name was Pariah Dark. And he ruled the Ghost Zone. He was a ghost of such power and magnitude, only he could control the entities contained within the Crown of Fire and the Ring of Rage. When wearing both, he could do anything. Until a group of powerful ancient ghosts banded together in a last-ditch effort to defeat the King. By locking him within the Sarcophagus of Forever Sleep”, Skulker frowning deeply, “or so we thought”.

Ember grimacing, “he’s only been freed for a day and he's already destroyed our homes”.

Danny blinks, “alright, okay, so this guy is a big bad”, putting his hands together and gesturing at nothing, “but like, has anyone ever tried, say, just talking to the guy?”.

Ember goes a little bug-eyed at him, “are you insane? That tyrant has spent eons terrorizing and mass slaughtering ghosts! Why would anyone sit him down for a ‘nice friendly chitchat’, dipstick”.

The Box Ghost nodding to himself strongly, “no wonder you do not FEAR my AWESOME MIGHT, for you must FEAR nothing to suggest THAT!”. An animal ghost lobs a gooey… something at the shouty ghost.

Danny humming, “so that’s a no then?”.

Skulker throwing up his hands, “I give up”; Ember giving him a comforting arm pat while everyone just shakes their heads disappointedly at Danny.

Danny smacking a fist in his palm, “I’m going to take him to get coffee, and he will vent caffeinated”; everyone was nicer over coffee right? Right. Who wouldn’t be? Danny nodding to himself, “and if it turns out he doesn’t like coffee then that’ll confirm that he is, indeed, a truly deplorable monster”.

The LunchLady crosses her arms at him, “I WILL be restocking your fridge with pound cakes again to flush out all that caffeine. Your diet is UNACCEPTABLE”, snarling a little, “you SHALL NOT taint our KING with your ways!”.

Skulker pointing at her aggressively, “oh let him! Who cares if that psycho has some kind of caffeine overdose! We want him gone or comatose anyways!”.

Kitty and Johnny share a look before simply giving Danny thumbs up. Kitty smirking, “go get ‘em tiger”.

Danny sputtering and stepping back a bit, that is so not where he was going with this! “This is not a freaking date!”.

Johnny snorting, rolling his eyes, “I’d hope not, kid. Pariah’s old as ass”.

“Good!”.

“Good”.

Danny huffing and crossing his arms with a pout, “soooo, who’s gonna help me?”. Damn near everyone just starts throwing things at him till they successfully get him to turn tail and flee from the onslaught.

Okay. So. Danny’s on his own with this. That’s fine. It’s cool. He’s got this. Everyone else thinks he’s being stupid and reckless but what does he care? It’s a good idea! Sure the ‘just talk it out’ plan has never worked, or at least never worked the first time, but still! All he has to do now is find a way to set this shit up! Should be easy enough.

You know…

If you ignore the fact that they’re trapped in another dimension and the closest he’s gotten to this ghost king outside of a fight is a giant floating face in the sky ominously shouting about their doom.

But hey! There’s that FrightKnight guy and that dude totally clearly serves this Pariah guy; be kinda weird if that wasn’t the case. But there’s the other issue, he doesn’t really know how to get in touch with tall, dark, and fearsome either. Sure Danny’s managed to summon him before, but that was back when the guy was sealed away and when Danny had direct access to the guys -very badass- sword.

Maybe Sam would know? Sure she’s likely helping with the whole ‘everyone in town is terrified’ thing but eh. Pacing in a little circle and watching the dome covered sky, “Sam, hey, so, look-”.

“Oh zone, what dumb idea did you come up with now? It better not be some self sacrificial bullshit”.

Danny chuckles very awkwardly, that was kinda plan b, “nooooo”, clearing his throat, he can absolutely feel her judgement through the phone and it’s absolutely making him sweat a little, “so you know how we summoned that Fear Knight guy-”.

“You mean how you summon the FrightKnight”.

“Haha yeah. So, think we, or I, could do that again?”.

“Danny doesn’t that guy serve this ghost king guy directly? How does that help anything!”, Sam sighing, “but I’ll check my books, I’m pretty sure there’s some kind of Halloween chant that summons him”.

“Cool cool”.

“Daaannnnyyy…. Why do you want to summon him?”

Danny rubs his neck, you know what? This plan was sounding a little dumb now. Oof. But in it to win it, am I right? “Because he serves this Pariah guy I thought that, maybe, I could get him to deliver a message to his royal highness, so I could invite the guy out for coffee and maybe actually talk things over for once”, rolling his wrist around, “you know, win with wit and words instead of fisticuffs?”

“Congrats, that’s stupid. But… I’m almost positive if anyone or even everyone does try to actually fight him it’ll just end in pain. And the only kind of a pain I like, is the kind that comes from tattooing”.

“Awww, you don’t like getting bodily thrown into walls?”.

“No, Danny, that’s your thing and- hey! Found it! I was right too!”.

Danny fist pumps a little, “nice”, okay okay so Danny is not totally boned here! He’s got something to work with! It’s not much and it’s not great, pretty awful actually, but it’s a thing!

“At least it’s you doing this and not Tucker, because you gotta sing-”. Danny absolutely cringes over that. “-so sing this in a spooky operatic tone, it doesn’t say anyone needs to hear you so count your lucky stars there. Here you go-”. Danny nods along, noting the whole thing dutifully.

Sam says he doesn’t need an audience, but well, Danny never been one to half ass shit and he’s a dramatic mother fucker. Belting out a song from atop the Observatory sounds like a kick ass idea. Besides! Fear guy seems really dramatic and might enjoy said dramatics enough to humour Danny and his shit long enough for Danny to avoid getting stabbed.

So Danny floats his sorry self on top of the Observatory, looking out and nodding to himself in satisfaction. Taking a deep breath and…

“O shadows of the darkened night!

Whisper through the blackened, curs-ed light!

From depths unknown, from lands untamed!

I call thee forth, the fiendish, the dire, the flamed!

From the void! from the void!

Come, O fear, from that deathly abyss!

O unutterable terror, dread minacious!

With trembling breath, thy come pugnacious!

With eyes unseen and hands that freeze!

I summon thee, from haunted seas!

Greet this soul, embrace this mind!

Whisk away the peace any dare find!

Through endless night, through choking flame!

Fear, I speak thee by thy name!

FrightKnight! Dark’s Herold and Fears Blight!

Fear, arise! Fear, descend!

Wrap thy steeds wings around the end!

Shadowed whispers, shrouded skies!

Manifest before mine eyes!

Breathe upon the hope that break!

With every thunder clap thou make!

O ethereal form, O endless night!

Come forth and weave the endless fright!

Thy presence calls the heart to cease!

Unveil thyself, O ancient beast!

With trembling hands and hollow breath!

FrightKnight I summon thee, the herald of death!

From the dark, I call thee near!

Come to me, O personified Fear!

Twist all thought, break all will!

Summon the terror, render hope nil!

Danny’s chest heaves, leaving only the echoes of a whispering ghostly choir, “fear… fear… fear…”.

Whelp…

That was fucking ominous.

And a few seconds later, with wind whipping wildly. “TO A RIGHT OF FEAR, I BEND MINE EAR! ATOP A FRIGHTFUL STEER, NIGHTMARE’S HOOVES DRAW NEAR! THOU HATH SUMMONED NOT CHEER, HORRIFYING WAILS SHALL ONLY HEAR!”. And with a thunderous lightning crack and thunder boom, The FrightKnight lands his steed atop the observatory, and Danny thinks he might have done cocked up just a weep bit.

Danny blinks owlishly and gives a little slightly awkward wave.

The FrughtKnight furrows his eyebrows, “you again, foolish half child”, dismounting off of Nightmare in a single swift and graceful motion, “your… call was respectable this time”, crossing his arms down at Danny, “so speak your peace, though thou must know I shall not dein to request his lordship cease his mighty reign”.

Danny rubs his neck, whelp, what the heck why not? “Honestly man? I just wanted to see if the guy would be down to get coffee and, I don’t know, maybe explain why he’s even doing this? Cause yeah, I’m lost and coffee slaps”, shrugging, “and if I’m gonna bend the knee to his power, or whatever, might as well do it with a bone buzz going”.

The FrightKnight stares at him, possibly baffled, it’s kinda hard to tell. Before huffing an almost laugh, “perhaps, at the least, your peculiarity will provide entertainment”, possibly smirking, “in the likeness of a court jester”.

Danny putting a hand to his chest, feigning offence, “hey I will have you know I am thee most entertaining of fools. I get punched for my mouth all the time”.

And… and The FrightKnight actually laughs a little. Well damn, this might actually mildly work. The FrightKnight turning away, “I shall return here, I suggest you not make me wait”.

Danny blinking as the guy rides off on his alicorn, “so I’m just supposed to stay here and twiddle my thumbs then? Yeah fuck too buddy”. Groaning with his entire body before just laying down on observatory, hands behind his head, he’d star gaze and trace the constellations except they’re in the ghost zone and there’s a goddamn glowing dome over the town, so he can see precisely sweet dick all!

Ugh.

Shit. Danny hasn’t even figured out where to go for coffee. Obviously not the Nasty Burger, he might love the place but it’s coffee kinda… sucked? and the big guy might take offence to being taken to a place that’s name starts with ‘Nasty’. Not Dalvbucks, for obvious reasons; Denny refuses to step a single foot in that place on principle. S&M? Their coffee was… okay but a bit sweet and Pariah goddamn Dark doesn’t seem like a sweets kinda guy. What about Remedy then? After all he was trying to remedy this situation? Oh he’s so funny.

Yeah Remedy it is.

Plus, if this goes to total utter shit then at least their espresso is basically molasses.

Then the FrightKnight just comes slamming down onto the top on the observatory, landing with one fist and one knee on the roof. Danny jumping and flailing in the air a little, “zone what the fuck man! Holy shit!”.

The FrightKnight swings to stand up full with heavy dramatic flair, “his highness demands your presence, your request has peaked his interest. For he knows not this ‘coffee’ you speak of, and desires to know what consumable you hold so dear that a small one such as you would choose to partake of it before their demise”.

Holy…. SUPER CRAP THAT ACTUALLY WORKED????? Wait did… did this fearsome fuck really just say that Pariah DOESN’T KNOW WHAT COFFEE IS???!?!?! How! What does Danny even do with that?!? Danny blinks really harshly, shaking his head out violently, “he’s… never had coffee?!?” Danny gestures at the ground, “how!?! Why!?!”, jerking up and pointing a finger in The FrightKnight’s face, “unacceptable!”.

The FrightKnight just stares, dumbfounded at Danny as he begins pacing, “I honestly can’t even begin to wrap my head around the fact that there are people out there, living, breathing, existing, dead, who somehow don’t know what coffee is. Coffee! C O F F E E! Kaa-fee! The lifeblood of humanity, our crowning achievement of creation! The nectar of the gods! The magic elixir that keeps us from descending into chaos before seven a.m or after it for that matter!”, Danny pausing and staring into the distance in horror, “oh my zone, is this a ghost thing? do ghosts not have coffee? Should I force Vlad to open one of his coffee shops in the zone? Hell! Why hasn’t he already done that! The audacity! The cruelty! The inhumanity!”, pausing and huffing before throwing his hands out to the side again, “but Pariah looks like an adult, how did he make it to adulthood without so much as a random sippy sip of that liquid gold? How did he even function? How did he make it that far in life, going through days without that warm comforting cup that screams, ‘Hey, I’m alive, and I’m ready to conquer the goddamn world’? Especially because world conquering kinda seems to be his thing, you know?

Cappuccino? Americano? Caffe macchiato? Cortado? A basic latte?”, pausing again to stare at The FrightKnight, “oh god, he doesn’t know about espresso”.

“This seems like an over reaction, his highness is waiting”.

No! No! How darn this tit not get the gravity of this situation! Danny sputtering, “but how couldn’t I over react? You’re telling me this guy has never heard of the thing that keeps, like, ninety percent of this planet from crashing face-first into their walls and floors on literally every random ass day? The magical drink that fuels everything from global economies to late-night tv binges? What? Did all he have was water from a stream by some barren-ass cave?”, Danny holding up a hand and waving it back and forth, “wait no, even an idiot would probably still find a way to brew coffee using, like, a pot and some fire or some shit”, dropping his hand and glaring at the ghost, “so, tell me, how? HOW has he avoided this fundamental part of existence? For the love of every barely functioning soul out there, I am getting that man a cup. Then he can watch the magic unfold as that tiny shot of espresso kicks in and everything becomes BEES!”.

The FrightKnight stares at him for a beat before just grabbing Danny by the scruff like a kitten and picking him up, “I shall not entertain this foolish ranting any further, if you have grievances, take them up with his highness”.

“You dishonour him by never bringing him coffee”.

“I do no such thing”.

“So you do bring him coffee and are just a liar”, Danny glances up and down the guy, still being held up in the air by his jumpsuit collar, “I mean I guess your pants are kinda on fire?”. The FrightKnight gives him a look that can only be described as violently murderous due to extreme disgust -repulsion induced murderous intent?- before just flying off with Danny hanging limp from his hand.

The FrightKnight all but tosses Danny in a heap at the foot of the throne, the rug leading up to it is ragged like whoever couldn’t be bothered to spend the effort or energy to fix it. Danny pushing himself up to sit on his heels, the walls are dirty, things are ripped and cracked everywhere; honestly? It was giving exhausted engineering student bachelor pad, just… you know, castle sized. Actually looking at Pariah -fuck the guy is huge- and the throne doesn’t look a whole lot better, scratched to shit and missing whole ass chunks. Pariah has an elbow on one armrest and his chin in a palm, he looks bored honestly and very grumpy. But like, if Danny had never had coffee he’d be pretty damn fucking grumpy too thank you very much gosh.

Danny blinks from his spot on the floor, he’s still a bit miffed but maybe being mildly respectful would be a goodish idea. “Hi?”.

Pariah narrows his eyes and seems to almost sigh, “I was told of how you desired to provide me with a taste of your world I have yet to know-”.

Yeah said ‘maybe I should be respectful’ desire is getting tossed outta the damn window, because again WHAT THE HELL WAS UP WITH THAT?!?! Danny leaning a little forward and pointing up at the guy, “yeah! That! That is so wildly unbelievable. How in the holy hell do you not know what coffee is? THEE drink of drinks!”.

Danny can absolutely feel that Fright guy just… staring at him. In shock? In amusement? In horror perhaps? Whatever. Fuck it.

Danny gesturing around, “the dark elixir that prevents us from becoming mindless zombies in a never-ending pit of despair and exhaustion? Are you a dead of some wild alien species that only consumes things in their most raw state, or some shit? ‘Cause how else do you not know what coffee is? Alien?”, Danny points at Pariah again before nodding confidently to himself, “alien”.

Pariah quirking an eyebrow at him before lifting his head from his palm, “I am not of alien descent, you fool”.

“Well then did you live in a cave raised by, I don’t know, Thylacines?”, gesturing some more and standing up aggressively, “you’re seriously telling me your giant ass woke up every morning like a regular living human, but instead of reaching for the sacred brew of all existence and life, you just stumble around like some kind of caffeine-less monster? Like I know all those other ghost were framing you to be some mass murder psycho monster, but I’d take that over the monster that is a being capable of being a fully awake and functioning caffeineless beast!”, pointing, “if you don't drink coffee, you're not living; you're just surviving”, pointedly glancing up and down Pariah’s form, “and, like dude, I'm not even sure you're doing that much. You look vaguely like shit, is that evil eyeliner I see or exhaustion induced eyebags?!? Who knows! Not I! Not you! Because you’ve never had coffee”, gesturing at random thins and spinning around a little, “and look at this place! Clearly either you don’t care, or you’re too tired to care. Look at that fucking wall! It’s got a hole shaped like a generic dick doodle and I betcha your not grounded in reality enough to have even commented on it!”, putting his hands on hips and turning back to Pariah, “pathetic. Not having coffee is pathetic”.

“I am not pathetic”.

Danny makes faces at the guy, leaning forwards, “bitch check yourself. This place, your broken ass clothes, the fact that you’ve been goddamn comatose for, like, evar, and you still maybe have eye-bags; just screams you need that hot cup of liquid motivation to scrape yourself up into productivity! It’s easy to have the energy to shit kick someone”, putting a hand to his chest and sticking his nose up in the air, “I would know”, looking down and pointing at Pariah again, “but getting the energy to read something you don’t wanna read or clean your damn floors because walking on clean floors just makes you feel better sometimes, now that shit takes real energy. Energy your shit ass clearly doesn’t have”, gesturing around, “case and fucking point”.

Pariah actually growls at him, Danny’s probably gonna get himself killed the rest of the way, “I hardly have interest in wasting time on tasks so far beneath me, that’s a role for worms like you”, Pariah grinning meanly, “far better you simply end”.

Danny snorts, crossing his arms, “a giant-shaped puddle of sleep deprivation, completely unaware that it’s committing some kind of unholy crime against its brain by denying itself the single most beautiful thing humans have ever crafted? Pah! You couldn’t wreck my over caffeinated ass for shit!”. Yeah way to go self, just start actively goading whats basically death god into a fist fight. Fucking brilliant ideal Danny! Whelp, too late, he’s done it now. “I’m a cracked up caffeine boss of wanton energy and these guns”, flexing stupidly, “and you’re just some lost little baby bitch soul in a sea of double-shot caramel lattes, venti vanilla bean macchiatos, and cold brew chaos; somehow missing all of them. Your aim must be absolute ass to miss all that coffee”, throwing his hands up in the air dramatically, “how can you even enjoy wrecking someone else’s shit if you’ve never even experienced the pure bliss of taking that first gulp of piping hot acid and getting gut punched with the feeling of being able to take on a machine gun wielding T-Rex, a tsunami, getting stuck in an elevator with someone you hate, and your entire email inbox that you’ve been ignoring for a month, all at once. You don’t meet the caffeine levels needed to end me, you oversized assclown!”.

Danny huffs a bit, vaguely outta breath but mostly just for the show of it. Pariah just… stares before looking to his Knight, Danny turning his head to follow suit. The FrightKnight has turned away, a hand over his face, head slightly tilted down, and one forearm against a pillar; is he just super disappointed in Danny’s entire existence or is he freaking laughing? How dare! Coffee is no joke!

Danny turning around fully and pointing violently at the ghost, “oh your pointy ass better not be one of those people who genuinely believes in that ‘hydration’ crap like some kinda lunatic. I will wreck your shit”, sticking his arms backwards at Pariah but still facing Teh FrightKnight, “how can you serve a planet wrecker, lair render, realm conquerer; and not be down with that empire-building, soul-empowering elixir! Ancient artifact passed down through the ages by the gods themselves!”.

Pariah… Pariah definitely laughs, and both Danny and The FrightKnight jerk around to eye him, “I am the only god any fools need”.

Danny blinks owlishly, putting on a mock old man mocking tone, “you don’t even know what coffee is, boy, the grown ups are talking”. The FrightKnight looks at him slowly, very slowly, “what… what is wrong with you? Have you no sense of self preservation, pathetic mortal?”.

“Honestly? No”, putting out his hands, “on the scale of things I care about between ‘coffee’ and ‘my life’ the ‘coffee’ side is getting weighed down hard enough to put a crater in the ground, and the ‘my life’ side gets flung up violently into the sun to be obliterate from of all of existence forever more. I stopped giving a damn about SeLf PrEsErVaTiOn a long time ago”, tilting his head, “probably around the time I discovered there wasn’t anything stronger than espresso, except just loading on more espresso”.

Then Pariah stands up -The FrightKnifhr kneeling immediately- and stalks over; glaring down at Danny who crosses his arms and glares right back up. “I have no need for your foolish ‘liquids’ to be a god, I am far beyond a god”.

Danny snorting, rolling his eyes, and moving to inspect his nails, “I don’t know, I think your jealousy looks good on me. I mean, I’m absolutely caffeinated and cranked up, that’s why I be vibin’”. The FrightKnight grabs his ankle and bodily slams him into the floor, making a little dent. “Dude my bone buzz does not need a bone break added in, Frighty”.

“Do not act on my accord when there is no need”.

“Apologies, your highness”, The FrightKnight swallows, “though he was, foolishly, insulting you”.

Pariah huffs, “as if such things bother me, weak fools always insult those they can not best”.

Danny chuckling from the floor, “bitch, I already bested you with my caffeine lubed blood stream. My blood and ecto high-fives my whole being, your shit ass ecto just slug-a-glugs on; uninspired, aimless, senseless”. Pariah moves to be basically stand over Danny, Danny nodding a little, “sup. You realized the greatness of coffee yet? Greatness that far surpasses your own?”; Danny is so totally gonna die and get ended here.

“You are tenacious, I will allow you that much”, huffing gruffly, “and, though, frustrating, you are interesting enough that I will deign to allow you your ending wish. I will try this ‘coffee’ of your, this ‘creation’ you hold up as your own god, and I shall conquer it till nothing remains but ash”, sneering, “you will end knowing a true god”.

“Cool beans, cocoa beans specifically”.

“I will know, and you will fail, if this is merely an attempt to poison me”.

“Ten bucks and a pound of pixie sticks that there actually legit is no poison that would work on you”, Danny pulls an arm out of the floor dent and points up at the guys face, “and I would never put this much effort into a damn attempted poisoning, poison is boring and can’t scratch that destructive itch”.

The FrightKnight looks back at Danny, “now you have the sense to compliment his greatness?”.

“Hey man, I get to introduce someone to coffee, I’m ridin’ high”.

Pariah leans down, grabbing Danny by the arm, and physically yanks him out of the ground before stomp over and chucking him aggressively out of the front doors, “return with your concoction, half flesh-bound fool”; and slams the door shut.

Danny just kinda floats for a bit. Well… he didn’t die die? Cool? Cool. Surprising! But cool. He is so totally getting coffee for that guy though. Danny ain’t no punk ass bitch. Never back down never give up! One problem… from where?!??!?

“What a peculiar creature”.

The FrightKnight nods slightly, standing respectfully behind his lordship, “indeed. In the time that I have been released I have heard a great many tales of his way with words and his… particular skill with verbally bashing all of his surroundings”, humming faintly, “some of the ghosts appear to pick fights with him for purely such a reason. He is… entertaining as much as he seems infuriating, to such a point as that infuriation is, in and of itself, amusing as well��.

Then off in the distance a shout can be heard “ HOW THE FUCK IS THERE NO DAMN COFFEE SHOPS IN THIS FUCKING REALM! VLAD! IM GONNA KICK YOUR ASS! HERE I THOUGHT I KNEW THE ENDS OF YOUR DEPRAVITY! BUT TO DEPRAVE THIS PLACE OF LIQUID ICHOR IS AN UNFORGIVABLE OFFENCE!”.

Pariah moves a hand back and smacks The FrightKnight over his helmet, “go aid that useless fool. Now”. The FrightKnight is off in a flash.

…

Pariah walks over to one of his windows after a beat, staring out at the endless lands and their greens and purples, “I wonder… does that boy speak true. An elixir that cures exhaustion, one that grants weary souls back their energy. A pulse that stirs the mortal realm”, humming thoughtfully, “perhaps a thing like that could grant me more than obliterating these lands can”.

The FrightKnight startles Danny, grabbing him by the scruff again, “you are akin to a needy mewling kit”, and growls a little.

Danny just points at the guys face, “you can make portals right! I!”, sighing dejectedly, “can not”, waving around a hand, “otherwise I woulda gotten my town outta this sitch and told the ghosts that live here to ‘deal with their shit’ already”, pointing again, “make me a portal, slave”.

The FrightKnight glares violently, “only because he orders me, not one such as you”, and makes a portal, aggressively throwing Danny’s sorry ass through it before walking through himself. Crossing his arms down at Danny, who landed face first ass up on a sidewalk, “now do as you’ve been ordered”.

Danny chuckles into the dirt, “yeah yeah”; is he still picking Remedy? Yeah, obviously. They have shops all over the place. Danny’s even more uninterested in getting it from DalvBucks now, because again, what the hell Vlad! He means really? You’d think the guy would, as a business man and billionaire, at least realize a complete massive hole in the market for some coffee shops. Vlad’s immoral ass should have thought of monopolizing that kind of obvious opportunity long before Danny did. Pushing himself up off the ground and transforming human again, “alright! Off we go to Remedy! For a remedy for ghost gods lack of caffeine!”, and starts marching off. The FrightKnight watching for a beat before sighing and following along; very clearly fed up with Danny’s shit.

“Halfa?”. Danny damn near jumps before looking at a door to the back of some building, there’s a blue? Or maybe purple? Ghost guy poking out of it, “what have you done!?!”, the ghost eyeing The FrightKnight faintly worried.

Danny puts a hand to his chest, “I am getting coffee”.

The ghost blinks owlishly, “the bane of the Infinite Realm has abducted your lair and you’re… getting coffee?”.

“Hey I don’t wanna get die-drated, you know. Livin’ la vida mocha before I get beaten black and brew”.

The ghost actually slides down the door and lays on the ground, “by the Ancients, everyone was right. You’re a nightmare”.

Danny putting his hands to his face and mock gasping, “oh my god I’m famous! That must mean everything is going to bean alright, because bad things never happen to famous people! Especially when I’m a latte to handle”.

“You peed in someone’s motorcycle tank”.

“Oh yeah that was great. Eight outta ten piss spot”.

The FrightKnight snarls, making the ghost jerk up with an ‘eep’ and partially hind away in the doorway again, “his highness has demanded this one bring him coffee due to his incessant bolstering and you shall not distract him further”; though The FrightKnight does actually eye Danny slightly respectfully.

The ghost shakes himself off a bit, clearly mustering up some courage and staring at Danny, “you freaking conned Pariah?!? Are you insane”.

Danny holds up a hand, “how dare you insult me so! I don’t joke about coffee! And think about it, put on your thinking cappuccino, the ends justify the beans. And what? you saying I made bad fucky whucky and now I’m gonna go sleep in the forever box?”, Danny tilting his head and tapping his chin, “maybe I’ll take Pariah’s coulda-been-if-Vlad-wasn’t-insane forever box?”. Annnnnd now The FrightKnight is dragging Danny off by his collar, again. This feels like it’s becoming a habit. (It did, in fact, become a habit; much to Danny’s amusement and The FrightKnight’s annoyance).

Danny pulling out his phone and google mapping his way to the nearest Remedy. The FrightKnight watching him, “do you not know where to go…”, and huffs disbelievingly. Danny holding up a finger but not looking away from his phone, “this ain’t Amity, sweet cakes, I don’t have every coffee shop on the planet memorized”.

“If his highness asked it of thee then thou should”.

“He can memorize this ass instead”.

The FrightKnight kicks him into a wall, which Danny peels himself off of unharmed and continues on.

…

Well at least they make it to a Remedy uninterrupted after that. Danny looking from his phone to the building and pointing at the sign, “it has appeared before us! A sign of the gods lands!”, turning to The FrightKnight, “now you, are we going back immediately after this?”.

“Obviously, fool. It is unwise to keep his highness waiting any more than he already has”, and with that The FrightKnight says nothing more as he turns invisible.

Danny nodding curtly, “good because coffee has optimal temperatures, you know”, and then just walks on in and up to the counter.

“Hello and welcome to Remedy, what can I make for you today? We have a special on Red Eye’s today”.

“Sure, two of those. And two double espressos; I’m from Amity don’t question it”. She visibly relaxes at that. “Two Americano Mistos and Two caramel lattes”. She blinks at him so he adds on, “promise I won’t die? Here’s my id”, Danny dutifully handing over said id.

She stares at it, turns her head towards the back, “Amity Parker!”.

Someone shouting back, “a teenager!?!”.

“Yeah!”.

“Oh god”.

Danny is just snickering to himself as the lady finishes writing his heart attack inducing order on paper and gets to work with her fellow employees. This was one of the nice things about all towns vaguely close to Amity Park, they all wound up hosting sport game things with the Casperhigh Ravens, meaning they all had to interact with Amity Parker’s.

One of the employees eyeing Danny, “what are you doing here anyway?”.

“Town got sucked into the void”.

“Right…”.

“I am the only who is free”.

“Okay then… I’m going to help them with the… insane amount of espresso that needs to be brewed now”.

That’s fair, Danny thinks, he did order, what, twelve? shots of espresso basically?

...

Yeah this is gonna take a while.

…

Like. A really long while.

Fuck.

He’s so totally just going to dick around on his phone for now. He can absolutely feel The FrightKnight’s invisible judgment.

:Chap. 2:

The Worlds Best Tasting ‘Wine’

Buy the time Danny gets his drinks he’s plows through a few levels of unpacking. Thankfully this place is great and knows what order to brew what shit in -and has many espresso machines because it knows its clientele base- and Danny’s got his drinks at optimal temperatures.

Meaning he’s now heading out to have coffee.

In a giant fuck off dilapidated castle.

With basically death god.

Pretty sure he did not sign up for this when he kicked the bucket.

But hey, coffee, with god, on a Sunday, that’s his fate now.

He’s not remotely surprised when The FrightKinight picks him up by the neck again, Danny pulling a face and trying to balance his trays, “don’t you dare spill the nectar! This stuff’s gonna be the start of a brew-tiful friendship”.

“Highly unlikely”.

“Oh you never know, Frighty, this stuff might just give his core the shit kicking it needs for him to not suck. Granted, this shit would straight kill the living if they drunk this much so… sucks to suck”, Danny snorting as The FrightKnights lifts his hand to make a portal, “imagine being alive enough to be killed by coffee? Pah! I could never”.

The FrightKnight sticking Danny through the portal and, actually gently, setting him down on his feet on the ground. Danny blinking up at the once again seated Pariah while The FrightKnight walks through his portal and closes it, walking towards Pariah and bowing, “we hath return, my liege”.

Danny blinks at The FrightKnight once before looking to Pariah, “heyya! Again”, lifting his trays, “behold thee ambrosial, gifted upon us by the earth itself. Its rich aroma rises like incense, filling the air with a promise of clarity and might. Each sip is a divine communion, a ritual that stirs the spirit and invigorates the weary soul. The dark, velvety liquid shall flow through us like a sacred nectar, bestowing upon us a true sense of purpose and vitality. In its depths, we shall find not only warmth but transcendence, as if we are partaking in the liquid of the philosophers stone itself. Come! Consume with me a drink so great you’d never wanna eat human flesh again”, Danny snorting and laughing a little, starting to walk over, “pardon my French roast ‘bout that last bit, it’s a song reference and I just had to do it ‘em”. Though… it does give him an idea…

The FrightKnight actually sighs as Pariah stands, the two following the massive ghost into a suitably massive dinning hall.

Danny tenderly putting the trays down and pulling out the respective cups. Danny nodding at everything when he’s done before rounding on Pariah, if this guy turns out to hate coffee then he’s gonna lose his shit… and probably also die die… especially with how much he’s hyped this stuff up. “So the tiny cups, the pure straight espresso is last because some people find it tastes like absolute ass by itself but ho boy is enough energy to fight the sun worth it”, pushing one of the caramel lattes at the guy. Danny taking his own and sipping happily while the larger ghost lifts up the cup -that looks comically tiny in his fingers- and eyes it curiously.

The man drinks.

The man… smiles. He likes it.

Danny has won.

Now time to get him absolutely fucked up on caffeine, because Danny? Yeah Danny’s tolerance is impressive. This guy might have been uncaffinated for years and comatose for more and built like a goddamn mountain, but Danny’s been slamming this shit back practically his whole life. Mom and dad even gave him the stuff as a toddler to ‘make sure he could out waddle those darn ghosties’.

Danny pushes the Americano Misto at the guy next, Danny pointing at The FrightKnight, “you! Fetch one of my friends to get more, he likes it and has so many centuries of coffee to make up for!”. The FrightKnight looks at him like he is insane but -and this is a big but- Pariah actually waves him off to do as Danny’s told him to. This Pariah guy might just make Danny go on a power trip.

Danny looking at Pariah as The FrightKnight flies off, “you're pretty ‘ight”.

“Do not push your luck, puny child”, Pariah takes another sip, “tell me, what is your name”.

Fuck that’s a good set up but no, nope, Danny’s holding out on bursting into song till this guy is well and truly FUCKED. “Phantom. Danny, Phantom”. It’s kinda funny because Danny can literally see the metaphorical life and light come back into the guys eyes, caffeine rejuvenating his very being in immeseaurable ways.

Danny watching Pariah take the Red Eye and sip it, blink harshly, but still go in for more. Nice. Very nice. Danny decides to power move on the guy and chugs his own Red Eye. Finally Danny gets that mild look of horror from Pariah mother fucking Dark. Ha. This is great. Danny lifting his empty cup up some, “coffee is not just some lowly simple drink, it is an invitation to step into the divine. When one sip it’s greatness, one partakes in an ancient ritual of renewal. The essence of the earth, mingled with the fire of our spirits, flowing through us. Each drop is a whisper of vitality, a reminder of the spark of existence that courses through our forms!”.

And then The FrightKnight gets back, with an obscene amount of coffee. Mostly espresso shots. Nice guys, nice. His two friends knew well when Danny was pulling a drinking competition out of his ass. Danny grabbing up the last of the drinks he bought, the little double espresso, and holds it up in a cheer, “coffee is a stacker, the more you drink, the more energy you get”; and pounds it back.

Pariah eyes his own tiny double espresso, “is that so”; he chugs the thing to and, maybe because he’s got this weird ‘I’m better and stronger than everyone’ thing he holds down his wince at the bitter taste.

Danny chuckles, grabbing another drink, “you look like a Viking kinda guy, yeah”, and fucking winks, downing the drink.

Pariah takes the goddamn bait. Not surprising since there’s no way he has never had alcohol… right? Yeah that’s gotta be right. Norse and Viking and shit. Wine or beer at least? Anyway, drinking competition is a go.

Danny drinking deeply, savouring every drop. While Pariah, wanting to prove his superiority, seemingly makes a point to match cup for cup; but Danny does not flinch, his eyes and form always steady and full of amusement.

Though… Pariah looks like he’s having fun too honestly. Maybe at this point Danny will manage to just befriend the damn guy instead?

But as the hours stretch on, The FrightKnight almost pitifully coming back with yet more espresso and lattes and Red Eye’s and so ons.

And…

Pariah has begun to slow, Danny can almost hear the guys core, surely his vision must be blurring just as his form was fizzing slightly, but still, the High Ghost King carries on, unwilling to admit his clear defeat.

Meanwhile Danny’s ass is still grinning, smile never fading, his skin and core not giving a single hint of jittering. He’d asked both The FrightKnight and Pariah himself to recount their stories and share their victories during all this shit, but at this point Pariah clearly can barely focus on his own words nonetheless the stories told.

Apparently the guy forced someone to eat their own fingers once? Ew and why honestly…

Danny watching the man’s fingers twitching spastically, out of his own control ever so slightly, as he eyes another cup almost with disgust.

“Your highness-”.

“Silence”.

Danny has to force himself not to grin evilly at The FrightKnight, since the frightening guy has clearly realized what was going on here; Pariah is way too buzzed to have noticed the same though. He doesn’t even try to keep the grin out of his voice though, “how ‘bout you get us another round, Frighty”.

The FrightKnight eyes actually genuinely widen in horror, even more so when Pariah waves him off, “sire, I must object-”.

“Go”.

The FrightKnight flinches and does as he’s told, the look his gives Danny is absolutely furious, Danny winks back like a jackass.

Danny, turning back to the table, downs another -he’s probably had at least sixty-seven espressos by now, he’s kinda impressed actually- before standing with a smirk. Pariah eyeing his cup and then Danny with disgust and caution, while Danny floats up over his shoulder, “you really thought you could out caffeine the guy who was practically singing its praises huh? Silly silly man”, floating over the other shoulder as the guys brows furrow, “prideful folks and their habit to fuck around and find out”, snickering and breaking out into song, Polyphemus from Epic The Musical was exceptionally fitting right now, “don’t you know that pain you sow is pain you reap?”, floating back to his other shoulder, “time to drink your blood over where you stand. Your life now is in my hand”, floating again to the other shoulder as Pariah struggles to stand, obviously now getting the, ahem, ‘danger’ he was in. “Before I'm done, you will learn that it's not so fun to take”. Danny easily and energetically zipping away from Pariah’s hand swipe, still hovering over the guys shoulder, “you came to my home to steal. But now you'll become my meal”. Pariah tries to lunge at him but his form won’t move right, then trying to summon a weapon to him but all it does it shake. Danny laughing, “a trade, you see? Take from you like you took from meEeEeE”.

Look. Okay. Danny’s not actually gonna off the guy or whatever. Even with this guy fucked up on an energy overload Danny’s still not winning shit dick all. Also combine that with the fact that Danny does absolutely feel like vomiting a little. Meaning he cuts the act out, laughing merrily and zipping around to give the guy a back pat, “relax, it’s a song and I’m just fucking with you. But yeah no, your bitch ass lost”.

Danny floating himself back into a chair and happily, stupidly sipping another Red Eye, it’s a little gross cold now. Pariah’s squinting at him as The FrightKnight portals back in… with nothing. The FrightKnight narrows his eyes at the scene, speaking slowly at Danny, “I was informed you’d be done”.

Danny snorting, nice guys, “oh yeah, I’m, like, one and a half drinks away from violently vomiting a Jackson Pollock painting all over this busted up table”, jabbing a thumb at Pariah, “and he’s a few past almost destabilizing himself and seeing the hat-man”.

Pariah huffs but doesn’t deny the statement, “there is a man wearing an hat in the corner, yes”.

Danny snorts, “yeah that’ll happen if consume a metric fuckton of any mind altering shit. I just have a lot of tolerance. He is not real, do not approach”.

Pariah stares at him, “aren’t you at the least tired by now?".

"I'll rest when I'm dead dead. Like you!”.

"No, you will certainly not."

Danny eyes Pariah, oh fuck he screwed up didn’t he? “what do you mean?”.

Pariah smirks at him as he sits down again very slowly and carefully, “I will enjoy your new title of court jester immensely”. Danny screams internally. “I have not felt this energized since teen hood”.

The FrightKnight blinks, Danny blinks, Danny bursting out, “holy shit! I knew it! You were just a fucking energy deprived shit head!”. Pariah crushes a cup, making Danny chuckle awkwardly, “who’s now not energy deprived and is totally definitely going to stop terrorizing an entire realm and my town? Please?”, grinning nervously, which vibrates a little from pure raw energy, “I’m your only good access to coffee? And apparently your court jester now?”. Danny glances at The FrightKnight when the guy pointedly crosses his arms and seems to raise an eyebrow, “oh nothing out of you, do you even know anything about coffee?”, taking Pariah’s cup off of the table, “like this espresso? Cold af now, definitely horrifically bitter and practically not even worth drinking now”, then whispering, “may it rest in splendour”, looking back to The FrightKnight, “you’d probably go and order him fucking Timmies decaf! And that stuff is god awful ever since they got bought out or whatever”, snorting, “that stuff gives humans the shits, I wouldn’t even want to know what that would do to a ghost”.

And Pariah? Pariah laughs, it’s a bit unstable-sounding but still, “the child has you there”. The FrightKnight looks to be in shock.

Danny nodding firmly, leaning back and crossing his arms, twitchy, “and everyone hates his ass, no way anyone else would actually go get him the good stuff or not actually poison it”, putting a hand to his chest, “I think I’ve proven I would never insult coffee like that!”.

The FrightKnight responding flatly, “if you’ve established anything, it would be that”; and eyes the numerous cups pointedly.

…

“Sooooo?”.

Pariah shakes his head, amused, and the air seems to shift or perhaps only Danny feels it shift, “your lair is returned from whence it came, foolish one who dared challenge and mock his god”.

Danny throws his arms up in the air, exclaiming, “HAHA! I WIN!”.

Pariah’s eyes narrow slightly, “you will put on a show for me and mine, fool. You will entertain me till you waste away to nothingness”.

“Haha! I lose!”.

The FrightKnight and Pariah seem to struggle not to laugh at him. Probably would have been mean laughs but still!

…

It would probably be pushing it if he tried to ditch Pariah and his giant castle immediately, wouldn’t it? Yeah yeah, probably. At least his friends probably know he’s fine, since him deciding to get the goddamn ghost of fear to ask them to get him an absolutely absurd amount of coffee orders while he’s in the middle of a fight, would be unhinged and stupid even for him. Though wait a minute… there’s no way Sam and Tuck would actually inform any of the ghosts of that… and just abandoning their homes especially when they all thought Danny was going to confront the guy, wouldn’t really make sense for ghosts… The ghosts did trap him once so them retrying that would make sense… Plus what about Vlad? That man’s ego was big enough that he legit might try to fight Pariah.

Danny snapping his fingers and pointing at Pariah, “let me sit on the throne”.

“How dare-”

“No no, listen, I’ll be sitting there all smug and shit when ghosts come bardging in to try defeating you. And they’ll be all like”, putting up his hands and putting on a mock whiney voice, “oh my zone! He beat Pariah! This noodle limbed smarmy shit’s our king now! NoOoOoOoO!”, dropping his hands and pointing at Pariah, “and then you can pop out from behind the throne, that thing’s fucking huge, and just ominously scare the ever loving shit out of everyone”. Pariah looks contemplative, like he might actually do this. So Danny carries on, “and they’ll all be like”, putting on the whiney tone again, “NoOoOoO! Pariah’s not ended! The halfa teamed up with him! We’re DoOoOoOmed! He might be a stupid shit but he can fight! Our last hope! NoOoOoOoOoOoO!”.

Pariah hums in consideration, “I shall grant you such an honour only once, and if only to terrify all those fools who dare oppose me or dare to entrap me”, standing slowly and marching back to his thrown room.

The FrightKnight staring at Danny, “I do not know whether to say you have tainted his highness, or to claim you’ve saved him”.

“Well considering he probably won’t get resealed now, kinda no point in sealing someone who isn’t so energy deprived that they bring wanton destruction everywhere they go just to feel something; the latter”.

The FrightKnight merely huffs at that as him and Danny follow after Pariah.

Okay so Pariah’s throne thing is supremely not comfortable and Danny is legit relieved -and somewhat filled with regret- by the time the ghosts do arrive. Barging in the door like they mean business and full of fake bravado.

“We’ll do what we must!”.

“Face us Pariah!”.

“The dark must fall!”.

“We are prepared to met our ends!”.

“Arghhhgghh!”.

“END!”.

Danny has his legs crossed, one elbrow on a knee, and face in palm; much like what Pariah had been doing when he first showed up in the rundown shithole. He smirks as they all fall silent, then giving a little wave, “little late, are we?”.

Skulker tilts his head, “Halfa?”.

Technus throwing up his hands, “I KNEW IT! I TOLD YOU THE GHOST CHILD WAS POWERFUL!”, then two seconds later, “OH NO HE’S POWERFUL!”.

Johnny throwing out his hands, “what the Hell man! Have you just been waiting here for us to do this!?! You jackass!”. Danny makes a point to laugh meanly at that.

Some random ghost muttering, “does this mean that one is king now?”.

Some weird cloaked eyeball ghost floats forward aggressively, “this does not make sense! We will not allow such a thing!”.

It just descends into utter chaos from there.

“How is this even possible!”.

“You mean to tell me he has the power of multiple Ancients!”.

“I can not be ruled by a guy that attempts to eat lamp posts!”.

“He’s not even entirely dead!”.

“That freak!?! Zone no!”.

“The HORROR!”.

“This is a sin! A sin I say!”.

“Oh zone is he gonna command us all speak in freaking rhyme or PUNS”.

It just becomes a mess of shrieking after that. The FrightKnight’s mouth is actually hanging open, shiny black teeth illuminated by his glowing green eyes. Danny can hear Pariah mutter, “unbelievable”, before stepping out and making his grand entrance.

Pariah stands there, slowly crossing his arms and glaring at ‘his people’, and everything goes silent until…

The crowd erupts in cries filled with pure terror, their voices trembling with disbelief as they witness the horrifying ’reality before them! Danny Phantom! With! Pariah! Dark!

One woman he doesn’t recognize screaming, “no! No, this can’t be real!”, her voice cracking with panic.

Technus damn near stammering, “HE’S… HE’S NOT ONE OF US ANYMORE!” , eyes wide with terror.

Someone in the background shouting,“please, someone stop this horror!”.

The Box Ghost shouting, “THIS IS MADNESS! We’re all DOOOOOMED!”, his hands shaking as he points at Danny very very dramatically.

Ember covering her mouth in horror, her voice barely a whisper, “he’s gone… Pariah has taken him. He’s lost”.

Someone else yelling, “everyone scatter! There’s nothing we can do now!”, as they grab others by the arm and try to flee, though the scene is apparently so horrifying that it seems like they can barely tear their eyes away.

This… this is a touch more over the top than Danny expected actually, go him and his funny man ideas. He absolutely can not help but burst out laughing, actually pitching out of the chair, spinning in the air cackling enough to make him tear up, “oh my zone! This- this was great! Hahahaha! He he he!”.

Pariah shakes his head almost in disbelief, reclaiming his throne, “to think such a simple trick would rile you creatures up to such a degree, your kind have gotten weak in my absence”.

The Lunch Lady is the one with the guts to stick her head back in through the doors, “that one, is a menace, WITH A TERRIBLE DIET!”.

Then Skulker all but storms in, “whelp stop laughing!”, gesturing at Pariah, “what the zone happened!”.

Danny floats to the ground, wheeze laughing a little, before calming down enough to respond, “I- I told you! We had coffee, man!”.

And then, because of course, Vlad’s smarmy ass shows up, “absolutely not”, flying aggressively at Danny, grabbing his shoulders, and shakes him violently, “I refuse to believe you ruined my plans like this! What sort of absurd insanity is taking a fabled Ghost King to get bloody coffee! Gouda Daniel! You are a fool! An imbecile!”.

“You will unhand my jester this instant, thief”, Pariah has his eyes narrowed threateningly at Vlad.

Vlad stares back, “ah, ahem”, and actually does let go of a smirking Danny. Vlad swallowing, “your? jester?”.

Danny finger-gunning at the guy from the ground, “apparently I’m funny, who knew”. Vlad gives Danny a look of genuine disgust before jolting from Pariah snarling, “begone with you”; Vlad, smartly, flees immediately.

Then the cloak eyeball guy floats back in at a slow and steady pace, staring -maybe? It’s really hard to tell- at Danny, “you are an unnatural walking disaster of a creature. Nothing good can come of you”. Which, rude!

Danny putting a hand to his chest, “thanks for the compliment, babe”. The eyeball ghost clenches Its fists at that, fucking good honestly. Danny doesn’t even know this ghost and they’re being a massive dick.

“Observant”, Pariah full on snarling, “you have no place to question me, to limit me with your pathetic rules and laws. Your feeble desires and so-called visions. You, too, will get out of my sight and never return”. The apparently named ‘Observant’ faintly flinches back and leaves. Meaning Danny doesn’t have to fist fight some random newbie today! Hooray! Then the guy turns on Danny, “you, come hither fool”.

Danny chuckles awkwardly, “I would jingle miserably across the floor if I had any jingle to give”.

Pariah’s mouth moves in that way people’s mouths do when they’re trying not to laugh; dude is definitely more chill now. “That is exactly the point, boy”, gesturing dismissively at the forming crowd, “prove my point to these far lesser fools”, then throwing a glare at The FrightKnight who hurries off.

Danny getting the jist, floating in front of Pariah, when frightful returns with a stick pole thing with a goddamn head on it and one of those jingle collar things that legit actual jesters wore. Oh fuck Pariah was not messing with him, note to self: Pariah doesn’t fuck around. That probably should have been obvious from all the mass slaughter and destruction, but nobody ever said Danny wasn’t dense.

The FrightKnight offering the stick thing to Danny with a kneel, which Danny takes because he’s not actually suicidal; it jingles very obnoxiously. Suiting honestly. The thing… does something? He’s not sure what, but it feels… kinda like his jumpsuit does, like it’s part of him or whatever.

Some huge ass four-armed blue warrior lady crossing one set of arms, shakes her head, and turns to leave; most other ghosts seemingly following suit.

Ember shakes her head at Danny specifically, “dipstick, how did you wind up this unlucky?”.

Danny shrugging, “eh, I slam dunked a basketball into gods halo immediately after being born”. Which actually makes her cover her mouth and snicker, her grabbing Skulker by the arm and dragging him out.

Danny nodding at the now empty area, holding his stick thing, the head’s face looks like it’s mocking him. Looking to Pariah, “so…. I’m gonna go make a bone necklace outta my sorta uncle now? That’s the guy who stole from you, by the by”.

The FrightKnight almost sighs, “and why are you doing that?”. But Pariah actually chuckles darkly, “to mock and harass is a jesters job, is it not”.

Danny snickering, “pretty sure he’s right, you know”, holding up a finger, pole thing now in one hand, “but if you need a reason-”, huffing, “-that fucker owns a coffee chain and hasn’t opened a single damn one in the entire zone. The audacity!”. The FrightKnight looks almost a bit offended that that’s Danny’s reasoning. Danny nodding curtly, “and I guess I’ll figure out what this stick does”.

The FrightKnight shakes his head but, with a nod of approval from his king, makes Danny a portal, “that is a marotte”.

“Fancy name for fancy stick, gotcha”. Danny zipping through the portal with plans of torment brewing, you know, in the same way that the desire to open up coffee shops in the ghost zone should have brewed in Vladdie’s sorry mind.

Pariah shaking his head before shaking his arms out a little, it was gonna be a while before that guy came down off of his Danny-induced caffeine buzz.

Danny finds Vlad rather quickly, in his huge fuck off castle of a house, getting a bit sloshed on whiskey. Vlad speaking his name with disdain, “Daniel”.

“It’s Danny, bitch!”, and with that Danny basically shoves the stick things face into Vlad’s own, making the guy jerk drunkenly before Danny full on bashes the guy with it.

…

Vlad’s hair and clothing turns head to toe an ugly mess of pinks and purples, Vlad glancing down while rubbing his head as Danny’s cackling and pointing mockingly. Vlad snarling at him, “Daniel! You turn me back this instance!”.

Danny wheezing, “get wrecked, cheesehead!”; laughing even harder when Vlad transforms and the colour changes stays. It’s like his horn hair is made outta moldy cotton candy! Danny, smartly, flees; forcing colour fucked drunken Plasmius to chase after him in public. Public shaming for the win! Danny is so totally doing this to ghosts at random all the time.

(He does indeed do it somewhat often, intentionally inconsistent with it to keep them guessing of course. Meaning Danny immediately becomes a complete menace about it, chasing folks around with the thing waving its startling face around wildly, it’s bells jingling ominously all the while. The Box Ghost strangely found being orange fun, till Danny figured out he could change things shapes a bit and started just making unholy amounts of circles around good ol’ Boxy).

Plasmius’s ’new look’ doesn’t last super long, just goes away on its own even, but it does make it into the paper. Danny stapling a copy to his wall immediately, it was pure gold. Danny admiring his handy work before looking back at Sam and Tuck, “so do you think I could convince Pariah to do crack? Just get coked up and do a coke twirl?”.

“DANNY NO!”.

Heh. He loves his half life so damn much.

(And if his first time ‘playing court jester’ outside of goddamn Pariah Dark’s Keep for the masses involved him sticking a cello in/on a golden toilet bowl, standing on said cello barefoot and in an oversized jingly fools cap/hat, playing it ominously, all the while making guttural growling sounds, and occasionally blowing a ‘here comes the king’ tune on a kazoo he taped to the cello; then that’s his business and everyone else’s horror. But hey? at least Pariah’s calmed the fuck down after waking the fuck up, thanks to the thing that wakes everyone else up properly; and Danny didn’t even have to fight him!

Fuck overthrowing death god king, a toilet bowl was enough of a throne for him, thank you very much).

End.

Prompts: There's more than one way to control a ghost Instead of fighting Pariah Dark, Danny invites him to get coffee "Aren't you tired by now?" "I'll rest when I'm dead." "No, you won't."

[scrunglepaws]

So, I've alluded to a scene in Aquarius where Kit bites Sails while kissing him... And now that I'm thinking of Kit/Tails in that setting, I thought of how it would play out differently with them.

((Note that I drew+wrote this post before finishing Ice Cream Break, which it is sort of a companion piece to))

In both instances, Kit doesn't know what the frick he's doing and is aggressive/bitey to cover up his insecurity. He also has a skewed view of love/affection in general, so he partially thinks you're kinda... Supposed to do that. dfklsdfj He genuinely likes Sails, so he's mostly just embarrassed about the whole thing. But with Tails, he is a bit of a shit on purpose. They have history and even though Kit's not trying to kill him anymore, he still sorta hates him. While also ssssort of liking him? Feelings man, what even are they??? (Being confused about this only furthers his animosity towards poor Tails. Who hasn't really done anything to deserve it. sdkfjlsdfds)

Anyway, now that he knows Tails is into him, he'll totally use that against him. He tests the waters, seeing what bad behavior he can get away with . He's going to have fun with it (I personally love it when Kit is a conniving a-hole. Can you tell.). So the above happens... And Tails is like "Dude, wtf? Omg, why it so hot when he smiles evilly at me like that? Oh Gaia, I'm in trouble. dskflsdjf"

Soooo yeah. Their relationship doesn't start out all that healthy. Eventually, I could see it going either good, bad, or terrible. Bad being that they break up and have a falling out because Kit can't stop being a shit. Terrible being that they stay together despite Kit being a shit (nooo, poor Tails! T^T). Good being that they finally come to an understanding where they have a healthy relationship (be it a continued romance or shifting gears to respected friend/ally). Not really sure what it would take to get there, but that's about as far as I've thought of them together-together up until this point. Idk, maybe Cream would find out how Kit's been treating Tails and beats his ass. \j dsfskdlfjsd

But yeah, one of the reasons Someplace!Tails never pursued Kit despite his long-time crush was because he was aware of how badly the baggage between them still effected Kit. And that it probably could never truly work because of it. He thought he was doing good by pushing his feelings down and just giving Kit space. Which, based on the above... I mean, he was mostly right. There's so much more I could say on ALL OF THE POINTS I've made, but I'd be writing a daggum book.

Long story short, I've thought about vanilla Kit/Tails from the Someplace au before. A bit. :D So thank you @Corvussio for giving me an excuse to ramble about hypotheticals and stuff! ^-^

Also, fourth-wall-breaking-Sails is going to kill us for "taking his man," so um. Run. 8D;;;

It was just for a hypothetical, jeeze! Y'all are still "canon!" >.> Dumbass pirate has no chill. (I haven't drawn Corvu since the magma sesh, so the design is kinda off. My bad. sdfkjsdlf Also, I made a sona finally. It's a plant thing. Yay. :D)

[princessbrunette]

line cook anon back again, thinking about how jealous he’d get if another cook or a customer flirted too hard w you… & he’d always walk you to your car when you get off, so casually protective if that makes sense… ugh dude not to mention him bending his girl over a table fucking her after they both had stressful shifts what!!!!!

omg

i think the first time another cook flirted with you, he’d let it slide with just a long stare directed at him, shifting his eyes between the two of you to make sure you weren’t feeling him. he understands, you know? you’re beautiful — and he doesn’t own you, even if he wants to, he feels like acting out jealously will ruin his chances.

the one time he’s ever a little mean to you is when he’s wondering why you haven’t been in the kitchen for agessss to see him, knowing you have orders being prepared. he pushes open the kitchen door to the restaurant and sees you there, giggling and chatting with a customer. the guy was good looking, and it was a jab in anakins stomach to see. suddenly, you’re hearing his voice and turning around, startled. “hey, you got like three orders backed up in there, you wanna do your job today or do you wanna keep slacking off?” he regrets talking to you like that as soon as he says it.

he watches your face drop, embarrassed, shifting your gaze away from the customer. you open your mouth to explain yourself, but decide not to, following anakin back into the kitchen with no more than a mumbled apology to the customer and your tail between your legs. you’re sensitive, of course you are, sweet girl like you, so his heart clenches when he turns around and you look a bit tearful, not used to having him talk to you like that.

“sorry, kid. it’s just busy in here. didn’t mean to get like that on you.” he talks a bit softer, plating up the meal and you shake your head quickly, straightening your back.

“n-no it’s fine. you’re right i was being unprofessional. i don’t know what i was thinking.”

“guess i was a little jealous too.” he turns his whole body to you, pressing the warm plate into your hand. you grip it, staring up at him wordlessly and he nods his head toward the door. “go on.” he offers a small smile and you remember what you’re doing, shuffling out to the deliver the food, his words ringing around your head.

when the two of you finally get together, i think linecook!ani is the definition of giving princess treatment. he thinks you’re too good for this place, always has, so he’ll be damned if he’s fucking you on some dirty table all cramped up and uncomfortable, only ever going as far as to rile you up at work so that you’re extra ready for him at the end of your shifts. after a long stressful day, your shared boss having berated the both of you, customers giving you hell, even coworkers being incompetent, he’s all but guiding your slumped body to the car at the end of the day and driving you back to his.

he undresses you, brings you into the shower, washes you, makes you cum on his fingers a few times until you can’t stand up anymore, gripping onto his wet body and crying as he cooes “i know baby, i know. today was too tough on my girl huh? you can relax now sweetheart this is all me, yeah?” dries you off, carries your warm damp body to bed, massages your hips whilst he slowly fucks your glossy, needy hole. soooo much praise. true princess treatment. talks you through it. “such a good girl today, my little waitress. so proud of you baby, the best at her job and the best at taking my dick. you like that don’t you? can feel you squeezing pretty girl, gonna make me cum. you want it? hm?” keeps his voice so low and gentle the whole time. god, linecook!anakin.

[shutupineedtothink]

X files 2x01 mini analysis/review!

Ok theres just some stuff I have to get off my chest about this ep. Which was stellar BTW.

I have to admit, the s1 finale was good but didn't reach the high highs of eps like beyond the sea and tooms for me.

But this one delivered at the top of s2 which is exactly what you have to do to kick off a second season.

Also pleasantly surprised that they aren't just immediately back on the x files by the end of the episode! I wonder how long this will play out but I hope it's another episode or two at least.

Some superficial stuff first: thank actual Jesus they put Mulders hair back the way it was, his terrible military haircut in the last few eps of s1 was so not it. I was instantly like omg his hair is back thank youuuuu

Loved the location change in this ep, basically putting Mulder in a bottle while Scully hunts him down.

RIP Jorge I only caught a little bit of the Español but my guess is he was saying there's aliens out there dude

Ok backtracking a bit - i loved the scene of them meeting in the parking garage at Watergate of all places. Scullys like what do I have to do to get you to talk to me bro and he's just looking soooo worse for wear. I normally love the chiaroscuro thing they do with the lighting all the time but this was a little intense on the shadow on her face. I love that she sort of not ruffles his hair but lays a hand on his head before she leaves. She's trying to comfort 12 year old Mulder in that moment.

Speaking of 12 year old Mulder, we see the full flashback to his sisters abduction. And I think we're meant to assume the same aliens show up at the station. That was wild and very spooky.

Love all the little espionage moments from Scully mainly in this ep. Getting the paper from the surveillance guys by scooping fish food into it? A+. Shaking the tail at the airport? A++. I love how determined she is to find him as soon as she figures out he's gone.

Meanwhile, Mulder is on his own, but speaking into the recorder- and we only learn he's been speaking to Scully the whole time after he says her name when he's going through the initial autopsy observations. At first I was like oh, he's assuming that she'll be conducting the actual autopsy at some point so that's why he's talking to her. David also does this great tone shift where he’s trying to be very scientific and methodical with his observations in the beginning but then you can hear his voice start to break down with fear and doubt when he says her name. Anyway, after that I realized no, I think we're meant to take it that he's been talking to her through the recorder the WHOLE TIME. he feels more lost and alone than he ever has but she'll never leave the back of his mind from now on. 😭

It really speaks highly of a two hander show when you can separate those characters for the majority of the episode and it not only still works but it still works really well. And I think it’s because you feel this magnetic pull from both of them always trying to get back to the other, whether it’s Scully literally searching for Mulder or Mulder talking to Scully through the recorder.

Bouncing back to Mulder and the recorder, I LOVE that he’s like I’ve been looking for these aliens my whole life but what would I actually do if they showed up? Such an important question for him to ask, and he finds out real quick.

I love that when Scully finally shows up she doesn’t have much to do except wake him up and get him moving - but he would be soooo dead if she hadn’t showed up. He’s basically half out of his mind, and without her there to be like come on we gotta go, no we can’t take this dead body, no we don’t have time for the print outs, come on you can’t find proof if you’re dead - he would’ve never made it. So you know. Partner shit. Obsessed.

The car chase through the jungle was WILD. Some of the shots of that fucking truck bouncing around were so ridiculous but yeah I loved it. I had to wonder, how did they get on a plane after that? Did they just roll up to the airport in that truck and leave it there? Did they switch vehicles first? Change clothes? Use fake names? Like how covert did they have to be to get out of there. I had a thought midway through S1 that a fun fic series would be their plane rides/car rides home after each case and what they would talk about and that would certainly apply here.

Ok final scene in the basement. First of all, where the fuck are they that they’re in this janky dark room with the most disgusting looking sink behind them listening to surveillance tapes. Whatever I get it, Mulder’s in the FBIs doghouse but that room seemed excessively gross. The lighting tho? Peak as always.

I’ve still got my work - long pause - I still have you - I gasped - I still have myself. I LOVED this line. Because a) our boy is back, mostly. B) I love that he doesn’t look at her when he says I still have you, he’s futzing with the tape player thing, but her head snaps up toward him so fast. And c) when he says I still have myself, we know he has his confidence back. Trust no one, but trust your partner and trust yourself. It’s Mulder and Scully against the world baby, and I’m ready for it.

Again, not so mini review but there you have it. Cheers to s2!

[mealbits]

Your art of tails biting Sonic is giving me weird headcanons that while he acts fairly normal on camera (the games etc) he would absolutely have that Crazy Scientist with No Idea What Normal Is vibe, caused by being a lonely child genius who was bullied before Sonic showed up and probably having zero equivalent peers other than Mr. Wont Stop Being Evil. I supplement this with the twitter takeover moment where he knowingly gets an innocent Yakker ejected for an amogus reference, and there are likely many more of these little moments but i forget.

Bonus conclusion: the previously discussed 3hr monster car video was a comedic masterwork of increasingly reckless stunts to test or prove the cars capability, including at least three "lets drive through this eggman territory zone, what could go wrong?," a few boss battles/high speed chases and at least one moment during construction that either involved gnawing on a part or getting electrocuted, possibly both. Also dramatically throwing the manual because who needs it?

I swear I'm normal about characters I swear I'm normal about characters I swear I'm normal about....

DUDE. OH MY GOD. YOU GET IT. tails would attempt to kill someone w/ a sword for a minecraft reference also btw. he would be soooo so good at hour long video essays too but hes too busy infodumping to anybody near him about how 2nd gen extreme gear gets a bad name for trying to be experimental and how later generations suffer from sticking too close to the base with little alteration as a result. like who cares that a 2nd gen extreme gear was more likely to just explode while you were using it on low air? the gimmicks for each board were just cooler.

[mintytealeaves]

Magyctale OCs!

These three have a unique style based on a time period for each of them. So they are all alive at the same time they are just based off of these time periods. 

1930s 

Hearts suit 

Carol 

38 

A very sweet no nonsense older sister. The oldest of six kids. She’s a singer at a bar and never lets her siblings go since she’s seen quite a few things go down there. 

She’s very devoted to taking care of her siblings after their parents disappeared.

She’s a very dark red color with dark brown hair. She has white freckles that I absolutely LOVE— She’s a little on the shorter side but still very strong. Her horns are small and they twist up very tightly. The tip of her tail is dyed white. 

The first picture is formal stage wear and then the second is her average clothing style

 (Yes I’m having so much fun with the designs…)

1950s

Clubs suit

Julie

36

A very happy go lucky girl. She believes there’s good in everyone and is often overexcited about everything. She’s very sensitive and ignorant, her mom made the mistake of sheltering her as a kid. 

She’s very much a nerd that hyper-fixates easily and is good friends with Carol. (Well good friends for now hint hint <3) 

She’s an orchid color with brown freckles (I really like freckles I’m sorry) she has brown eyes and a short little tail. Her hair is in a neat bob and she’s got big round glasses (another one of my favorite design thingys) 

This is pretty much her wardrobe.

2000s 

Diamonds suit 

Noah 

16

Carol’s adopted sibling.

Noah is super energetic and is basically the standard drummer dude in all the Disney channel movies. He likes very bright colors and loves making Kandi bracelets and wants to be a skater (he has failed at this so far) 

He has a prosthetic arm since he lost his in a big accident. 

He’s a very dull dark yellow and has black hair. He doesn’t like his appearance and is always putting brightly colored stickers and clothes on to make himself look brighter.

His clothes style varies from men’s clothing to a little more feminine but he doesn’t really care.

He’s a firm believer in wear what makes you happy.

These two pictures perfectly sum up his style lmao—

I had SOOOO much fun with these! I would’ve drawn them but I don’t have the skill to draw like that yet

but they are beautiful in my head and I love them

Magyctale belongs to @bonetrix-arts

I hope you like them!

(Also idk why the age numbers are so big…)

[pencilofawesomeness]

Ft x TW: NRC boys' type of fairy tail magic

Ohohoho what a can of worms to open! I have considered the FT in TW au far more than the TW in FT au, but this changes now lol.

Obviously both sources are fairly soft with their magic, but it's true that FT specializes far more, either by choice or by affinity. Soooo time to spitball around a bit. (As I try really hard not to get too deep into backstories and make this more complicated than it has to be.)

Riddle: Some sort of nullification/wave magic—essentially like his signature spell. Riddle probably tries to be an all-around mage nonetheless, but it comes back around to nullification nonetheless.

Trey: Enchantment. He'll claim up and down that it's just minor tricks and little buffs, but this dude can probably rewrite a human being if he wants to. Though he would be fantastic support. Full mom mode, for sure.

Deuce: Full Counter. Yes I am aware this is not an explicit Fairy Tail magic. But I call him my Full Counter child way too often for me to get it out of my head.

Ace: How far he goes with it is up for debate, but card magic. It starts with some simple tricks, and then his Quick Learning kicks in and Ace can do a variety of things given he has access to the card for it.

Cater: Solid script magic. Maybe some other script magic too, though Cater would downplay how much he could do with it, but dude has a way with words alright.

Leona: He would be the type to know a variety of magic, enough to keep people guessing about his limits, but his main developed magic would be crush magic, much to the consternation of everyone. (Himself included sometimes.)

Ruggie: He could totally have something funky like Figure Eyes or some sort of straight forward puppeteer magic, but I think his overall magic would be speed. Ruggie go noom.

Jack: Transformation magic, so he can turn into a wolf and whatever other animal he desires. Not necessarily seith magic, but I do think he would focus on animals because he's just like that.

Azul: Dude would totally be a celestial spirit mage. It's all about collecting minions and getting them to do the heavy lifting, after all. That said he's definitely a Contract Guy so he would be fair about things. (And he would get heckled by the spirits sometimes too; a true give and take relationship right there.)

Jade: Telepathy magic that is definitely just used for good ol consensual communication. Yep. Not like Jade can eavesdrop on people's minds or anything. :)

Floyd: Reflector magic of some sort. Can't hit him because your magic goes wonky. Oh no, you gotta fist fight instead. What a nightmare. (For you.)

Kalim: I honestly can't decide if he'll be a water mage, because of his UM, or if he'll do something completely left-field, like dancer magic, because he is a fun guy and a good bean like that.

Jamil: He would certainly be a jack-of-all-trades type, but mostly an air/wind mage. Within that sphere, Jamil has a lot going on: healing magic, some purification, transportation, ripping the air out of your lungs, enhanced hearing, invisibility—all the useful stuff. He probably knows some charm magic on the side, too, but that's a surprise tool for later.

Vil: Poison magic because I think it would be hilarious. He's equally very proud of his very potent poison and also distressed because it's such a volatile magic and everyone looks at him *like that.* Vil would be great at making elixirs and antidotes too though.

Rook: If anyone would have some sort of take-over magic, it would be Rook. It's the ultimate appreciation of life if you ask him—as well as the ultimate hunt. He would probably deal mostly with beasts, but with just enough other types of transformations that it makes people wonder. How exactly Rook acquires these take-overs is up to the imagination.

Epel: Make-magic. I'm not 100% sure on the type—I think some sort of glass/crystal, maybe—but his amazing carving skills definitely strike me as good make-magic material. Plus he's a creative little fella that would definitely whack people with a comically large hammer given the chance.

Idia: He'd be the guy to naturally develop seith magic against his explicit will, but that's okay because he never really uses it. (Except, perhaps, for Ortho...) Idia would focus on magic tech and developing items, but if his extremely sentient constructs happen to house some souls because he's a bleeding heart after all, then nobody really has to know.

Ortho: Archive magic. Because it's the internet. Tbh I don't really get archive magic in the context of FT's world all that well, but nonetheless, I think Ortho would be able to do it. It's all about running analysis and being the bestest support. (That said, Ortho would probably be casually good at some sort of light/energy magic on the side; for the tactical nuke.) Provided Ortho is not, you know, a soul in a construct.

Malleus: He's gotta be a dragon slayer. Them's the facts. That said, I am somewhat undecided on the type. I lean towards lightning, because the lightning motif is pretty prevalent, but Malleus is also very fond of his fire breath. A green fire dragon slayer, perhaps? Or he would be something super Extra and Edgy, like "tempest dragon slayer" or something, that is mad OP and can do large scale atmospheric stuff and weather. Dude's a beast, after all.

Lilia: Something spatial focused—like teleporting or territory. Well, he would probably use it mostly for teleporting but he can actually do some super insane stuff if things get serious.

Silver: Like his dad, he's also a spatial mage, but for requip magic. Silver would totally play the Erza-card and focus on weapons and armor and such.

Sebek: He would have the type of sound magic that makes your eardrums burst, and Sebek would be sooo effective with it. Maybe he could be a speed type on the side too, as a treat.

Grim: My dude would be an Exceed that stubborns his way into learning fire magic, even if it's super basic.

[darkx-the-dragon-kn1ght]

Chapter 6- Part 3

Through this corner and up this hallway we go, aaand here we’ve got some more Grunts!

It’s more likely than you think!

Alright, this isn’t so bad- Riptide can handle Aron pretty easily. Water Gun time, baby!

Heck yeah. Well- not for Budew, both Aron and Zubat have been ganging up on it, very sad. Anyways, back to attacking-

Hm- Riptide’s not doing as much damage to Zubat as I’d like, not to mention he just got a level-up…so you know what? I’ll switch into Whiskers, she’s got Zen Headbutt anyways.

Speaking of switching, uh…

You know what? Sandile’s a much better matchup against the Zubat than Budew. In fact, it’s such a better matchup that Sandile ends up stealing Whiskers’ kill with Bite!

Eh…a victory is a victory I guess, and Whiskers gets the exp. points either way.

Oh- his Sandile’s Ability is Moxie? That’ll be good to remember in the future.

You’re not allowed to do that punchline!! I already did it!!

Alright, so, continuing on up here, we kinda turn these corners, and then…

Hey, there’s an item up there! I don’t think we can go up to the second floor just yet, but when we do, I’ll have to remember to grab whatever that is.

AND THEN X HAD TO LEAVE TO TAKE CARE OF IRL STUFF.

SHE CAME BACK AFTER SEVERAL HOURS.

So, it is currently 9:30 PM as of the time of writing this. I could wait until tomorrow morning to continue on with this escapade, when I’m a little less tired, but I’d actually rather not do that, soooo…

(Future edit: Little did I know, I would have no choice but to put the rest of this play session off until the next day anyways, but I digress-)

Also, through the power of saving the game, I have discovered this location is called Mosswater Industrial! As I said before: YEAH DUDE, IT SURE IS!

Now, despite the fact that Ace told the Grunts to slow us down and we need to stop them from deleting all the data (I’m assuming), I…don’t think there’s an actual time constraint? Like, Fern didn’t say anything like “we need to get up there as soon as possible, we can’t waste time fighting everyone” or something, and there’s no indication of a legit time limit, so like…I don’t think there’s a penalty to fighting all the Grunts we come across.

In other words, despite the fact that we went around these two, we’re gonna beat them up anyways.

Alright, what have we here…I don’t think we have anything that’s specifically good against either of these, but Streak can still hold his own. And we can start that with Tail Whip, which will lower both Rattata and Lillipup’s Defenses at the same time! 

This’ll be useful not just for Streak, but for Fern’s Sandile as well because uuuuuh…well, Budew got knocked out again. RIP, I guess.

So, neither Streak nor Sandile are super great against these two, but they’re still doing…something. I’m having Streak focus on Lillipup for the time being-

Which worked out very well! Now these two can just focus on the Rattata and win the battle, which also works out well enough- ignore Streak’s HP, he’s fine.

Can’t believe Xera and Fern are exterminators now- but given that was a bit of a running gag with a D&D campaign me and some friends did (lest we forget Slap Her Bald Head Sunday), I’m fine with carrying on the legacy in this playthrough.

And I was heading into the menu to check something, and I finally noticed something…

The party gets healed after every battle! I didn’t even notice that in the last few battles, but now that I do- great! That means I’ll have an easier time saving resources (namely those Potions) during this. My cheapskate arc in this game continues on apace!

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