#THAT'S TOO MUCH PAIN
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Sun is always the calm one. While the Moon has more fps, always moves and wants to gnaw on walls, pace around and destroy timelines, the Sun is the one who prevents the chaos, usually by doing nothing. Or at least that's how I see them.
#art#oc#yourenotsupposedtobehere#ynstbh#blender3d#I think these two characters come directly from my experience - i always more active at night as well#i mean you too can't exist when there's so much pressure from sun it gives you a headache and pain in all muscles? no??? just me???
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Arcane season 2 ending made me too sad so yk what, everything is fine actually, Viktor is now a teacher at the Academy and he mentors young Zaunite students. That's how I choose to cope.
#arcane#arcane season 2#arcane viktor#arcane jayce#arcane jinx#arcane ekko#arcane spoilers#arcane s2#jayvik#timebomb#arcane au#digital art#my art#clip studio paint#the amount of time I put into this piece is way too much for me lmao#I'm not used of drawing background that was a pain in the ass#but also I hid a few funny things on the blackboard feel free to look for it#very self indulgent#I'm craving Viktor and Jinx interactions they would have been such a cool duo in another life#Viktor being Jinx's mentor scratches my brain perfectly#I have so much thoughts about this au
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evening drive
oh yes and some little doodles of them... sunset totally drives a motorcycle right?? been experimenting with how i want to draw her so maybe this'll stick idk.
#i use too much purple dont i#sciset#my art#mlp fim#mlp art#my little pony#mlp#twilight sparkle#eqg#mlp fanart#mlp eqg#equestria girls#scitwi#sci twi#mlp eg fanart#sunsetsparkle#sunset shimmer#ik the motorcycles dont match but i still havent figured out what i want hers to look like#aww lookit them they're both nerd weirdos#also thank you to the 12 different people i asked for advice when i was drawing this#3 point perspective is a pain in the.. back
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ARCANE LEAGUE OF LEGENDS: 2x08 - “Killing is a Cycle” ↳ "Some people are really misunderstanding the dialogue before the scene in the cell" | (essay link)
#please read the essay it made me appreciate it more when i read it#also sorry not much gifs today sadly im too busy for the next few days but i will post at least two sets a day#arcane#arcaneedit#wlwedit#caitvi#piltover's finest#arcane league of legends#league of legends arcane#vi#vi arcane#caitlyn kiramman#caitlyn arcane#arcane caitlyn#league of legends#type: gif#media: arcane#s2 ep9#gonna try to make some 8k wallpapers tomorrow#god coloring this was so painful enjoy
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no mercy 😭
#one piece won the poll and I wanted to draw smth nice and wholesome#but I hated the perspective process and the multiple characters were a pain so where did that bring me?#that's right; perspective and multiple characters in shtpost format#don't you just love it when you put too much pressure on yourself and the way to fix that is to draw smth silly#vibrant colours go brrrr#pls trust me when I say I like sanji#I mean look at him#one piece#strawhat crew#sanji#luffy#zoro#chopper#usopp#nami#nico robin#cyborg franky#o0kawaii0o
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the best person I know.
#genuinely cannot stop thinking about these two#I promised myself to not draw them too much because I have so much work to do#but oh well#take one more fanart#I love them so much#dead boy detectives#dead boy detectives fanart#dbd#dbd fanart#painland#painland fanart#chedwin#chedwin fanart#edwin paine#charles rowland#the sandman#my art#digital art#ghosts#illustration
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Oh, my son
rkgk tonight playing around with some brushes and texture ^^
#ithaca saga will destroy me#I. love them. so much.#putting the pain and grief of cramps into this one#there are mistakes and it’s kinda messy don’t look too close augeuwusu#odysseus#telemachus#the odyssey
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you know, you know. no gods, no masters, no kings on pedestals. everyone is fallible. death of the author. you know! you are balanced about your intake of media - you allow the wiggle room, the grace, the gratitude, the skepticism. nobody above criticism.
but still. a weird gut-punch feeling, something akin to betrayal. you read the article. surprise! an author you love is actually: a serial fucking predator.
well, shit. what now. no, you knew he was a person (all people are), but now you're wondering - what have i overlooked by accident? what messages have i internalized that are strange and cruel? and also, like, what the fuck?
his actions lay a thick glaze on top of everything. like each place is now ruined, opaque in a new way. but okay, fine, you've done this before. you knew better, right? you've been betrayed by many a cherished childhood author.
still, this stickiness. fuck. can you pick up that book again. will you read it to your children. you've recommended it to others - will you ever do that again? and of course, of course, no parasocial relationships. you were theoretically above this kind of sentiment. but the artist informs the art, right.
so it's not something as clear-cut as feeling he owed you, specifically (a stranger) better behavior - just that you kind of, in a distant and odd way... sort of trusted him to do better. it's not like a real trust or something speakable, just the faint hope that the product (good books) was a thin representation of the soul. now it feels like the product (good? books?) was a mask. in some small or insignificant way, your previous support of this person lent them power. your money and your time and your laughter.
and the thing is - you have this terrible, echoing sensation. how many times will this happen? over and over. you find out that the singer you love is actually a predator. you learn over drinks that your favorite high school english teacher is in jail for what he did to her. you listen to the news idly and suddenly discover that a woman you used to idolize has been abusing her kids for an actual eon.
what can you touch without the static melting off. you can't even really complain about it too much (you were supposed to know better, and besides, you don't want the same re-split "it's not your fault, love what you love" basic advice), but now it's here. somehow, it feels like - you let him into your life.
it's not that things need to be pure or an artist has to be like, endlessly perfect, mindful. demure. it's more just this terrible truth that has been replayed through your veins so often it feels criminally vain. power corrupts, absolute power corrupts absolutely. did you want any one person to be worth that power?
it's just that he wrote books where he seemed to understand that. he seemed to know about hierarchies and unfair systems and bigotry and privilege. you thought they were books about what it means to struggle. you thought they were about having power and still using it for good rather than for control. he spooned you a narrative of being a good guy, a kind soul. you fucking bought what that fucking monster sold.
maybe that's why they were fantasies, after all.
#spilled ink#warm up#oh im .... sick to my stomach.#i talked to him. like ....... we talked. that man interacted with my poetry and writing.#that article.... gutwrenching. i am so sorry to everyone he's ever even been in the room with.#i feel.... like... unbearably. sick.#he acted like he was cool and friends with me!! we were cool internet writers together!!!!!#i feel sick for even having been polite to him.#i ...... am experiencing something so fucking complicated.#i wonder how many of u are feeling that too. like ''oh i sent him an ask and he was funny and sweet''#THATS HOW THEY GET U. ..... and YES I KNOW!!!#i am so fucking well-read about parasocial relationships. it would just be nice to like. trust that someone ISNT#hiding a huge fucking background of BEING A COMPLETE MONSTER. LIKE WHAT THE FUCK.#by the way i am not part of a fandom. this is “what the fuck i accidentally supported a rapist” not#“but my showww���. like i care far more about like. the human cost.#but also like... people are people. idk i saw a take on here about how nobody should mourn the books#and idk. people almost always reply to any scenario with their personal experience first -#''i knew him'' or ''wow i was just at that store'' or ''i grew up there'' or whatever. because that is how we establish connection &#emotional weight. that's just... a person thing. and there is a difference between 'oh this guy is a monster'' & the feeling of:#he's been a monster and i SUPPORTED THAT. i CELEBRATED him. i !!! a fucking victim myself!!!!!!!!! SUPPORTED . HIM.#i am sick. i feel so much pain for her and everyone he's ever hurt. saying ''the books are ruined'' is i think ... like how people say#they're shocked and disgusted by him. (obviously there's nuance here. im sure there's some creep doin it wrong. but u know. in general)#idk..... im an author. i understand my work is in your life in whatever small way. i understand that connection. it's real.
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(no supe como traducir esto a inglés, sorry xD)
#honkai star rail#honkai#honkai fanart#doodles#boothill#dan heng#caelus#drawing Boothill was so painful but I still love him too much
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drawings from paleo expedition to dagestan, done right on the trip. sometimes messy when it was cold and rainy, but i won't correct it. i think it's cool to leave it just the way it was done, and not retouch it after. there will be more drawings later, but those will be done from home
#i need to draw for 2 museums at least to then send it to them as a gift cuz people there were so nice???? AAAA#and yeah im definitely doing back#maybe in autumn... who knows#barghestland#art#artists on tumblr#and#paleoart#???#in a way it is i guess#also i usually don't share things from my sketchbook. but these drawings hold so many nice memories#of clouds that hide top of the mountains#of sitting on a rock#drawing and seeing a scorpion vibing next to u (tiny friend!)#of leaning on a big cow and almost falling asleep on a field with her after the rain#of... forgetting the pain too#of not wanting to even talk about the wonderful time i've had. because it was only for me to remember#so much happened up in the mountains that i'll never forget#thank u big rocks and soil and grass and apricot trees i love you#...#paleoland#fieldbook_barghest_land
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ftm amy. hell yea
reminder to bind safely!!!! take care of ur ribs <<3
dont forget ur daily clicks!!
#doing him justice by drawing him with a skirt pained nails and lashes#i think i love him too much to let him go. would u guys be ok if from now on i just drew aimé instead of amy??#also idk if u say fem ftm or ftm fem. i dunno inglish 👍👍#im gonna go to bed now bc i ddidnt sleep shit bye :33#sth#sonic fanart#sonic#amy rose#aimé rose#transmasc amy rose#nov.aart#nov.oodles
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#apologies#boundaries#you are not too much#you are not a burden#your feelings are valid#your pain is valid#your trauma is valid#you matter#you are enough#self respect#you are worthy
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doodles (as i avoid work) of the super awesome you wouldn't like me alive fic by @ectoplasmranch which i binge read in a 7 hour sitting yesterday
#🧻 sharts#danny phantom#danny fenton#dash baxter#i aint tagging everyone else. jazz was the most fun to doodle though#figuring out their faces was . hm. it was a moment. i hope i made jazz and danny look related enough HAHA probably not. i wanted jazz and#him to have the same eyes its just jazz still looks like a normal girl and danny looks like he's lost all zest and life for the world#like shit man if someone looked at me like that in the highschool hallway id be scared too i dont blame you dash#UGH DASH IS LIKE A GOLDEN RETRIEVER TO DRAW FOR THIS FIC. i love it so much. i love me a shitty guy turned nice#elderich horror danny is cool. im tag rambling now. my bad#this fic has a bit of a death grip on me. i need to be normal and go to bed#ALSO I CANT FIGURE OUT HOW TO DRAW TUCKER IM SO SORRY. HIS HAT. IT PAINS ME#anyway uhhh if u like danny phantom read dis fic? pretty please? for me? its at 127k words atm so. if youve got a day to spare#(dont be like i me i fucked up my eyes binge reading it LMFAO. be smarter)#guess ill die (danphantom)
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i don't normally participate in these redraw challenges but it's megumi so i'll make an exception
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#megumi fushiguro#fushiguro megumi#fanart#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk megumi#megumi#looks at clock UHHHHHHHH oops#i got lost in the sauce that is rendering his gd chin and under his lips.... ive been in stylized anime mouth land 2 long i fear#i had forgotten how much of a pain those shadows are :'>>> eSP at a lookdown angle#fought a bit but little did he know i spent years doing coloured pencil portraits. this is My domain#god but the rest of the skin render was so FUN i love . warm grey in2 brown in2 red/orange fr the deep underneck shadow#lip tint heavy blush freckles glossier model fushiguro megumi...........im a believer i fear#had a bit of a hard time finding a middle ground between how i normally draw his hair and a more Realistic take on it#the model in the og has hair that's pretty close but i think the strands r a bit short n too heavily curved fr my tastes#its my brand im afraid i simply must give itfs both longer hair#nothing else feels Right#but god i underestimated how Good this photoshoot is as megu material . i get the hype now i get it#i did the sketch n i looked at it and i had an oh /oh/ moment#smh megumi put those lustrous emerald orbs away before u hurt some1#his gaze is too powerful . slaps a red bg on him makes him my new icon :)#anyway its 6am it is morning time do i sleep fr like 3 hrs or do i say megumi voice Whatever we shall see
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genuinely i think it's important for adults, especially in the plague times, to play pretend in our day-to-day lives. when i rub my back down with tiger balm so i can sleep without pain, i imagine i am a valiant knight tending to an old injury i received from a dragon. when i go to the store to pick up eggs and milk, i am a lone cowboy riding into town on a mission. when i turn my collar up against the wind i am a femme fatale who's killed 4 husbands and is scoping out a 5th. when i stomp around in the snow i am a doomed polar explorer. if being a little bit silly about my walk to the pharmacy helps me remember that life can be full of joy and whimsy, then so be it.
#this is a pointless text post#my most embarrassing version of this is that whenever it was foggy at the lighthouse i imagined i was emily bronte#or that i was taking a walk in the fog with my good friend emily bronte :^)#so much of this is also tied into the fact that my body hurts all the goddamn time#i am trying to make my pain something i can live with#is this gonna be how i learn that normal people don't daydream about being In The Past#anyway do u guys imagine these sort of scenarios too or am i just a freak#greatest (s)hits
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this is the first time back at my computer since my back injury 3 months ago and i had a hankering for some isabela 💙🗡
#girl. im in so much pain#i hope this gets better with time. these last few months have taken such a mental and physical toll on me#honestly been not feeling good about my art too but im trying sooo hard to stay positive OTL#isabela my lovely save me!!!!!!#isabela#dragon age 2#dragon age#da2#my art#art
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