#THAT would fix me.
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I think my beef is with Instagram specifically. I feel like I have to filter myself so much over there for some reason.
Here I am abridged and slowly going insane but you guys are used to it so it’s different. I was writing about it, it genuinely feels like myself and the itzaak I portray are two different people who aren’t compatible to coexist.
It’s my middle name, my mom picked it out for me. Sometimes she’ll say my full name just because she likes it. There’s such an important part of myself stuck in that obnoxious spelling of Isaac, and it’s starting to feel weird.
Idk!!!! Anyways I’m drawing cowboy Keith hashtag things r fine if I pretend they r
#itzyaap#that’s my not shutting the fuck up tag.#in all seriousness I hate the internet and feeling like I have to be perfect and correct all the time#this used to be so fun#and now it’s not#it’s just stressful and stupid#like dude my name is Grayson I wanna be Grayson not the extremely condensed version that just goes by my middle name#I’m literally starting to hate it#I like when my friends and people call me itzaak and stuff but I feel like I’ve become a brand for lack of a better term#I need to move to somewhere stupid and become a cowboy.#that would fix me.
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aw yay i found it !
#jerma and old computers and old ads? maximum comfort!!! :3#i always say if i was rich youd know because id have a whole age r*gr*ss room-#but not like how other people have theirs with actual childrens items- i mean 'it is 20-30yrs ago' stuff in it :D big tv with tape player#big computer; crt screens. that 'honeyoak' colour wooden furniture i think its called. that desk setup that has all the compartments. yknow#THAT would fix me.
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Why can't a man with hairy arms and big biceps be psychosexually obsessed with me?!
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People against piracy fail to realize that no, I can’t just ‘buy it.’ They stopped making DVDs and Blu-Rays. They’re barely offering digital copies for download. I am not spending money I could use for food or bills to pay for a subscription service just so I can always have access to a beloved piece of media. Especially not when the service will remove media on a whim without concern for how the loss of access to that piece will make its artistic conservation nigh impossible.
For example, I recently learned that Disney+ had an original film called Crater. It’s scifi, family friendly, and seems cool - I would love to buy it as a holiday gift for my little brother! But: it’s exclusive to D+ and THEY REMOVED IT LITERALLY MONTHS AFTER ITS RELEASE.
The ONLY way I can directly access this film is through piracy. The ONLY available ‘copies’ of this film are hosted on piracy websites. Disney will NEVER release it in theaters, or as something to buy, and it may NEVER return to the streaming service. It will be LOST because we aren’t allowed to purchase it for personal viewing. If I can’t pay to own it, I won’t pay for the privilege of losing it when corporate decides to put it in a vault.
So yes, I’m going to pirate and support piracy.
Edit: if you are able, use $5 you would otherwise use for a streaming subscription to donate to a GazaFunds campaign.
#edit: go to https://gazafunds.org/ and donate $5 you would otherwise spend on streaming services on a campaign!#ra speaks#piracy#media piracy#pirate to make hondo ohnaka proud#obligatory ‘don’t fucking pirate small authors/artists works wtf dude’ statement.#anyone who’s seen my media bitching before knows I’m a hype man for indie films this ain’t about them#this is about corporate streaming services killing physical media bc sales numbers are less impressive than number of streams#edit: USAmericans stop telling me to buy DVDs and blurays at Walmart. think outside your borders for a hot sec. fun thought exercise.#your experiences are not universal#edit: WHO GOT THIS TO 100k. I JUST WANT TO TALK (this post is my second to hit 100k woahg.)#in other news: fix your fucking posture. drink some fucking water. and go the fuck to bed if it’s late bc it’s for me rn. peace and light.
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lead balloon (the tumblr post that saved me)
if this comic resonated with you, it would mean the world to me if you donated to this palestinian family's escape fund.
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no creative notes because this isn't that kind of comic.
I know I don’t owe any of you anything but I still felt compelled to write about my long term absence. And I feel far enough away from the dangerous spot I was in to be able to make this comic. I have a therapist now, and she agreed that making this could be a very cathartic gesture, and the start of properly leaving these thoughts behind me. I am still, at seemingly random times, blindsided by fleeting desires to kill myself. They’re always passing urges, but it’s disarming, and uncomfortable. I worry sometimes that my brain’s spent so long thinking only about suicide that it’s forgotten how to think about anything else. Like, now that I've opened that door for myself, I'll never be able to fully shut it again. But I’m trying my best to encourage my mind in other directions. We'll see how that goes.
I am still donating all proceeds from my store to Palestinian causes. So far, I've donated over $15K, not including donations coming from my own pocket or the fundraising streams which jointly raised around $10K. In the time since I made my initial post about where this money would be going, the focus has shifted from aid organisations to directly donating to escape funds.
If you'd like to do the same, you can look at Operation Olive Branch, which hosts hundreds of Palestinian escape funds or donate to Safebow, which has helped facilitate the safe crossing and securing of important medical procedures for over 150 at-risk palestinians since the beginning of the genocide.
#cw: suicidal ideation#cw: suicide#cw: self harm#cw: mental health#cw: depression#i made the balloon the main representation of my self destructive urges for a reason but im not going to explain it#i tried to keep a lot of the details in this vague#it would be my worst nightmare if this comic encouraged someone to hurt themselves#so. please dont#for a long time even the thought of making this comic felt so insipid and narcissistic#with the state of the world as it is#having the only threat to your life be yourself felt so privileged and trite and shameful#but doing this comic made me sit down and process things in full#and im just. very grateful i didn't give in to my thoughts back when i sincerely felt i'd be more useful to the world dead#i also feel the need to say that this wont represent everyone's battle with mental illness. its unfortunately different for all of us#there is no fix-all#and im afraid this might be one of those comics that either resonates a lot or misses the target by a mile#i made it for myself foremost. and now that its done im glad i did it#thank you for reading#and please stay alive#stillindigo art#stillindigo comics
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I was walking out of the Walmart today, and a car passed me, and I got this incredibly vivid impression. It wasn't really in words, but if I had to put it into words, the two key points would be
a). I needed to watch that car and
b). That I needed to be careful, because the driver of the car was a massive bitch.
It kind of took me by surprise, because I really had no reason to be beefing with that car, and I also hadn't really had an impression like that since I was religious, which was in my teen years. Right? It'd been a decade since I had a little voice whisper in my ear, and I'd basically written it off as nonsense.
Anyway, I watched the car, because The Spirits or whatever were very insistent that I did. Car drove fine, went into the parking spot, inched forward, and right when it should've just stopped, the driver gunned it for some reason and it ran into the curb and cracked its bumper.
So, the driver got out, and she went to the front of the car to check that yes, she had cracked her bumper, and then she turned to look at me. The parking lot wasn't empty, but we were the only two people standing in that row, and I'd probably been staring at her for tenish seconds now.
She demanded very angrily to know why I hadn't warned her of the curb. And I could have said I didn't know you were about to gun it or is it my job to help every stranger park, or even could you have even heard me, inside your car?
And all of those would have been fine, but I was really, really busy digesting that I had somehow communed with Mormon Jesus again for the first time in fifteen years, and that the communion had mostly been there to let me watch someone park badly (?), so what I responded with was:
"Because it was foretold."
And I can't tell which would be funnier, if she went silent because there's not much to be said to that, or if she went silent because in Utah, she might actually believe me, but we parted ways without more words.
I'm still kind of digesting this myself, actually.
#Mormon Jesus really wanted me to watch someone crack their bumper?#It was kind of funny to watch#like if this is gods apology i guess i can take it#a decade and a half of radio silence between former highschool friends and then one sends the other a shitpost#and maybe the friendship isnt fixed but its a channel you know?#at least we're talking again#would that all my stupid mistakes could be divine shitposts#amen#Babylon-Lore
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Every one adores you, at least I do.
#rip edwin and charles you would have loved am I gay quiz#i think a kiss would fix them#(by that I mean me)#alexxuun#dead boy detectives#dbda#dead boy detective agency#dead boy detectives fanart#dbda fanart#payneland#paynland#charles rowland#edwin payne
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tie me to your bed and force me to take a knotted toy that's too big. listen to me cry as you stretch my hole and slap my cunt as i beg you to stop. when you push the knot in, watch my back arch and my eyes roll back as I rock my hips up to take the knot. as I start to get used being filled, switch it on. let me scream as it comes to life and starts pounding my puppycunt. this is my place, this is where I belong- tied down and forced to submit
#feral barking#this would fix me#ftm nsft#ftm sub#ftm puppy#ftm breeding#i need this so bad#cnc overstim#overstim kink#Kn0tted toy#ftm knotting#Knotted toy#kn0tting#please please please please please#i guess this is stuff i am into now damn#trans cnc#ftm cnc#ftm ns/fw#trans nsft
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sympathy for cain
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk art#yuji itadori#ryomen sukuna#fushiguro megumi#nobara kugisaki#sukuna#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#and here i thought i had finally drawn smth that didnt need the spoiler tag but unfortunately nobara has her eyepatch smh#crazy tht i end up drawing sukuna of all people when im in this mood#havent drawn the guy in a while fr starters#also Not the character i would have thought to choose to process my emotions for me but it fits very well#dont read into it :)#i dont like this piece too much tbh like its fine its cool im just in a headspace n this has all of it in it#this is why i dont typically like to draw to vent bc then i cant look at the finished product without seeing all the feelsbad behind it#but whatever . maybe todays chapter will fix me#oh yeah 2 fv captions in a row bc thats what u get when im emo. shame/rotten goes hard fr sukuna/yuuji
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I need you to fuck me until I forget about everything except you.
#text#mine#it's not a want it's a need#and i also think this would fix me#relationship goals#nsft concept#bd/sm community
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the quiet ones.
#transformers#tfp#transformers prime#rafael esquivel#tfp soundwave#maccadam#art!#do you guys also think that they kinda parallel each other or am i insane#what i would have given to have soundwave and raf interact saudhuashddash#bonding with raf would have fixed soundwave me thinks
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Sorry I'm late, I got added to the Wild Hunt last night and ran and reveled with them for what felt like 100 years plus a day until I landed the killing blow on a stag with bronze antlers then suddenly woke in my bed, willow leaves in my hair, a nameless song echoing in my ears, and my hands still bloody, so yeah, totally missed my alarm and stuff.
#would getting pulled into The Hunt fix me or make me worse its hard to say#the wild hunt#blood#unreality#post#best of#fae
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A good boy saying “like this, mommy?” as he fucks me into the mattress
#this would fix me#fem domme#bd/sm mommy#subby boys#domme mommy#mommy k!nk#dom mommy#subby men#soft fem dom#subboy#male sub#mine#my post#txt post
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