#Superpower mishap

[luxpurplishgreen]

It's funnier if it's Tucker who is stuck.

He was just tinkering with some Fenton inventions plus some stuff he got from Technus.

Then he suddenly got sucked into cyber space.

He didn't even know his liminal abilities included rudimentary technopathy!

He keeps trying to ping Phantom's Chirper account, but his friends are out fighting ghosts rampaging through downtown Amity and can't answer.

(Of course Danny made a Chirper account where he could shitpost weird stuff as Phantom. Duh. It's a popular account, known for its sarcasm and morbid deadpan humor paired with pure randomness. No one outside Amity takes the ghost thing serious, but thinks "Phantom" is hilarious anyway.)

Tucker's messages gets more and more frustrated since Phantom doesn't answer.

Then Tucker apparently get eyes through a traffic cam in Amity and spots the ongoing ghost attack. Which makes him stop complaining about his friends/team being shit for ignoring him, and instead rants about badly timed ghost attacks.

Now some people (including Oracle and Red Robin) follows the trail through Phantom's Chirper and the live videoclips of a ghost attack Tucker is sharing - only to realize that wow, this might not be a joke after all.

Lots of people gets exited - because here's a superhero they knew nothing about!

The Bats gets upset - because how could they completely miss the fact that a small Midwestern city is regularly attacked by some kind of glowing monsters?!

Most of Phantom's Chirper followers have something of a crisis - because now they realize that they might have spent months exchanging stupid memes with a dead teenager!

Meanwhile Tucker gets more and more frustrated and exasperated. Because: Hello! He is still stuck in the internet! Could someone perhaps help him get unstuck today!? Seriously? Why can't they focus on what's important? Phantom being a ghost is old news!! Tucker is stuck - right - frigging - now!

The outrage and excitement keeps building. So may people starts digging, and the information blackout around Amity Park is finally breached. The GIW's firewalls were never meant to defend against a trending hashtag plus the best hackers among the Bats straining them all at once.

Unfortunately Tucker's situation gets sort of swept to the side in the frenzy for information...

(Danny will owe him soooo much groveling once Tucker is out again, and if he even breaths anything about "Bad Luck Tuck" then Tucker is going to frigging Soup him, best friend or not!)

-.-.-.-.-

Tags: @starmee-lodurrson @passivedecept @thegatorsgoose @coruscateselene @imma-friggin-duck @attentionzero @amercurio @satanicrutialspecialist @whathehe11 @stargirl1331 @overtherose @skulld3mort-1fan @lazy-bouqet @writer-extraodinaire @screamingtofillthevoid @basilf1res @mimilikey @treepainting @seraphinedemort @bathildaburp @nappinginhell @anon-ymous22 @silverheartlugia2000

Nightwing giggled at the post he found. He wasn't sure if it was real, but seeing as they live in a world of metas, gods and aliens surely anything was possible, right?

Still, a post on Chirper stating:

"Superpower mishap. My consciousness is stuck in cyberspace, please send help"

was kinda hilarious, even before he edited it to add:

"Not Batman. Do not send Batman."

And of course everyone on the internet is a troll which is why not only was Batman @'d a few million times but other members of the batfam were as well.

Baby bird was still trying to figure out how someone could get thier consciousness of all things stuck in cyberspace while Oracle was doing the digital equivalent of poking the poor data guy with a stick. Interesting times indeed.

[redvelvetwishtree]

[theresattrpgforthat]

Mint's TTRPG Library

Here is a list of links to the Collections I add Itch.io games to on the regular, where I often go to in search for games to meet folks' recommendation requests.

These collections are large and unwieldy. I'm not certain that they're easy to navigate, but if you want to do some browsing, you certainly have options!

Systems

Belonging Outside Belonging Breathless Caltrop Core Charge Descended from the Queen Firebrands Forged in the Dark Honey Games (Honey Heist) Into the Odd Lasers + Feelings LUMEN Par-AGON (Paragon System) PbtA Push Together We Go Troika (A bunch of Troika supplements) Tunnel Goons (AKA Goon Games) What’s So Cool About _?

Genre

Adventure - With Pulp! (Westerns, Dinosaurs, Spies, Time Travel) Bittersweet Futures (Post-Apocalypse) Botanical Adventures (Plants) Bring Me The Evidence! (Mysteries) Cogs and Steam (Steampunk) Delicious Delights (Food & Cooking) Dirtpunk (Revolution, Rebellion, Fighting) Eras Both Real & Imagined (Historical, Faux-Historical) Everyone Loves A Competition (Competitions, Sports) Fae and Fen (Faeries & Goblins) Fangs, Fangs, Fangs (Vampires) Grim & Gritty (Gritty & Grimdark Fantasy) Hearts & Threads (Romance) Manners & Mischief (Social & Political) Mechs and Tech (Mechs & Robots) Modern-Day Mishaps (Modern-Day Setting) Monsters & Mutants (Monsters, Monster Hunters, Pokemon - simulators) Neon Lights & Cyber Nights (Cyberpunk) Oh So Anime (Anime & Manga themed) Paranormal Activity (Ghosts, Cryptids, Death) Pastoral & Cozy (Cozy Games, Witch Games) Paws and Feathers and Scales (Animals) Sorcerous Intentions (Magic-Users) Stars and Science (Science-Fiction, Space) Sword & Sorcery & So Much More (General Fantasy) Teenage Hijinx (Teenagers) The Sea Calls (Oceans, Aquatic, Pirates) With Great Power (Superheroes, Magical Girls, Fantasy Superpowers)

Other

Abstract Games & System Bones (SRDs, Genre-less) By Pen and Paper Played (Epistolary Games) Funky Fresh Flavors (Miscellaneous) GM-Less Solitary Adventures (Solo Games) System-Neutral Settings (Adventures & Settings) The Art of Creation (Collaborative World-building) Two Can Play At That Game (Duet Games)

[rubydubydoo122]

Maybe the real reason why none of the Robins actually die is because they’ve accidentally been deity-fied.

I mean, at first they were a literal urban legend, until they started getting involved with the Justice League. And even then, I’m sure the people of Gotham think that they are not humans.

I know Jason woke up because of multiversal mishaps, but what if Jason woke up because enough people were praying for Robin to come back to make sure Batman doesn’t continue to put people into the ICU.

And after that moment, none of the Robins, past present or future, were able to permanently die unless the entirety of Gotham was wiped out.

Steph and Dick died for a couple minutes and then woke up.

And Damian came back with superpowers (for a little bit) and I know he came back because Bruce did everything in his power to make sure he got Damian back, but like, Damian came back.

So yeah, just Gotham accidentally deifying their vigilantes.

[onlytibki]

DP Thought

"Vlad had to go through all the superpower mishaps Danny did but with no support system at all and with every moment its sank bitterness deeper and deeper into his heart"

inspired angst. excellent hurtiness. establishes him perfectly as Danny's foil

"Vlad left the hospital as a halfa with a fully formed core and never once experienced a single power mishap. He dismisses Danny's unique experiences because he doesn't realize it's actually different. His entire backstory was him pathetic-wet-cat-man-angsting about his current existence like a 1980s Victor Frankenstein."

fits the modern love for the wet cat man. excellent metaphor for the generational divide. establishes him perfectly as a little bitch.

[the-vex-archives]

DCU Masterlist (2024)

General

Oneshots

"A Sisters Love" ( x Platonic! Batsis! Reader )

@cipheress-to-k-pop

You realize you have a lot to learn about yourself outside of your little brother, Damian’s, shadow.

"Ohana, Bitch!" ( x Platonic! Batsis! Reader )

@cipheress-to-k-pop

No summary provided

"Call Mom" ( x Platonic! Batmom! Reader )

@cipheress-to-k-pop

No summary provided

Dick Grayson

Oneshots

"Animal Instinct" ( x Platonic! Damian Wayne )

@cipheress-to-k-pop

No summary provided

"Wedding Mishap"

@cipheress-to-k-pop

No summary provided

Headcanons

Dick Grayson when his Future child comes to the Present

@cipheress-to-k-pop

Damian Wayne

Oneshots

"Animal Instinct" ( x Platonic! Reader ) ( x Dick Grayson )

@cipheress-to-k-pop

No summary provided

"Trust Takes Time" ( x Platonic! Batmom! Reader )

@lazydoodlesandfanfic

Damian is very closed of to batmom, and she is just trying to get close to him. One day, he has a bad day and he tells batmom everything because there’s no one else there.

Headcanons

Damian Wayne x GN!Superpowered!Kyle!Reader

@cipheress-to-k-pop

Damian Wayne when his Future child comes to the Present

@cipheress-to-k-pop

Damian Wayne with a Muslim S/O

@cipheress-to-k-pop

Bruce Wayne

Oneshots

"The Reveal"

@toastedkiwi

No summary provided

Headcanons

Bruce Wayne when his Future child comes to the Present

@cipheress-to-k-pop

Conner Kent

Headcanons

Conner Kent when his Future child comes to the Present

@cipheress-to-k-pop

Jason Todd

Oneshots

"DIY Nerf Gun"

@cipheress-to-k-pop

No summary provided

"Curls"

@cipheress-to-k-pop

No summary provided

Headcanons

Jason Todd when his Future child comes to the Present

@cipheress-to-k-pop

Tim Drake

Headcanons

Tim Drake when his Future child comes to the Present

@cipheress-to-k-pop

Roy Harper

Headcanons

Roy Harper when his Future child comes to the Present

Wally West

Headcanons

Wally West when his Future child comes to the Present

@cipheress-to-k-pop

Arthur Curry

Oneshots

"When World’s Collide" ( Marvel Crossover )

@fanficimagery

Imagine leaving New York behind after a messy breakup, only to return five years later. Your old friends are happy, if a little nervous for any possible drama, but everything turns out well when they realize you're doing very well for yourself.

[spacewarriorsam]

The 7D episode idea: Jollywood's Newest Superheroes

OK, I had this idea for The 7D. Anyway, here's the plot: A magical mishap zaps the dwarfs with unexpected superpowers. Happy generates light (and glows in the dark), Bashful can turn invisible, Sleepy has telekinesis, Dopey has super speed, Grumpy has super strength, and Sneezy can fly. Doc, however, remains frustratingly ordinary. As Queen Delightful calls upon the "Super 7D" to stop a villain, Doc must strategize around his team's wacky powers and his own lack thereof. Will the newly powered dwarfs save the day, or will their newfound abilities cause more chaos than good? Meanwhile, Doc tries to convince everyone (including himself?) that his brilliant mind is still the most valuable power of all.

Running Gag: Every time someone asks about the dwarfs' amazing abilities, Doc puffs out his chest and proudly declares, "They've got incredible powers!" Then he leans in and mutters, "Well, except for me, of course." When they hear that, they all laugh. Maybe Doc can reply angrily, "HOW IS THAT FUNNY?!"

Doc, despite lacking powers, could still prove his worth by using his intelligence to guide and support the dwarfs. The other dwarfs could also learn valuable lessons about teamwork and appreciating their unique abilities (including Doc's mind).

EDIT: Ooh. I know: the villain plot can be the Glooms teaming up with Dr. Jingleheimer and pretty much almost every villain the 7D faced (except Salvatrolle, but mostly Dr. Jingleheimer) to emit a signal to take over Jollywood and brainwash the citizens to obey them. And the 7D could have a showdown with them in some epic battle scene.

EDIT 2: Want me to make an outline of the episode? I can do that. And as for well as how Happy’s powers would work, think Starfire from Teen Titans, minus the flying and laser eyes.

[nobodysdaydreams]

Okay, now they REALLY gotta drop the Jacobi duck-related lore 🦆 (and I need to stop holding out hope Blessie will return 😔💔)

(Or my reaction to Wolf359’s Mission Mishap Episodes).

Welcome back dear readers! My schedule has been busy lately, but the Mission Mishap episodes were mercifully short, so I’ve been listening to a few episodes per week and have gathered my reactions here for you all to enjoy.

Tagging the mutuals who got me invested in this, and if you want to be tagged or untagged from these posts, lmk, or you can follow my blog or simply follow the tag "#bods wolf359 reactions". Anyone who has followed me for a while knows my updates are inconsistent, so I apologize in advance for that and for any spelling/grammar mistakes in my posts.

@sophieswundergarten @oflightningandstars @acollectionofcuriousreblogs @herawell @commsroom

Also tagging @lovelyladylavie because I promised I’d tag you way back on this post and forgot (I’m so sorry!) but my reactions are all under the tag so you should be able to find them!

Mission Mishaps: A Little Night Music

"Not fully reading your contract before you sign it...not understanding your job responsibilities, and wanting commander off your back" I love Doug's sponsorships and the dramatic irony 😂 *Cue The Fine Print playing in the background...*

I guess the only actor they could get was Doug. Nice of him to fill us in on what Minkowski and Hera are saying though.

OH MY GOSH.

HIS VOICE.

DR. DR. PROFESSOR DR. PROFESSOR F. EIFFEL 😂

It's so fancy. Mannnyyyy PhDs. Very impressive, Doug.

I'm so happy we got more radio show Doug. I need to hear him do a radio show where all his personalities talk to each other. Being the special guest on the show is Cutter's punishment for all eternity. The Dear Listeners make 5 copies of Doug so he can be all the characters.

"The feeling you'll die miserably..." yikes, broke character for a second there Doug.

"Ah yes...the way the piano notes dance around the...other piano notes...absolutely fantastic piece for when you want to start your day with the paino-y energy" Well said Doug.

Oh boy. Cowboy music. Is this the return of Badass McAwesome? Do I dare to hope?

Ah, well, better luck next time.

His poor toe. I hate when that happens too, Doug.

The...mind eraser?

Don't like how that sounds. Especially after the threats in "Change of Mind".

Better not be foreshadowing.

"This song is a mutant, it's superpower is being catchy. It never leaves."

Okay, THAT better not be foreshadowing.

"Afraid of the plant monster?" I wish we could be, Doug. I wish we could be. 😔🪴

"Worried you'll never get back to Earth to see you're family?" Oh, Doug. 💔

"Bosses you're pretty sure are kind of evil" Kind of is generous Doug.

Yeah...yeah Doug that got very dark there for a bit.

Moral boosting? Oh dear. MUTE 😂 AFTER TWO MINUTES 😂

I love Doug. Poor fellow. I enjoyed the broadcast Doug. They don't appreciate your talents.

Mission Mishaps: The Space You’re In

I love the title’s double meaning.

More of Doug dodging his work I see. A common theme.

“Please stop going off on tangents” I guess Cutter and Pryce didn’t send them up with any ADHD meds. “I’m here for work 😊” Nice cover, Doug. 👍🏻 nailed it.

“I’m gonna get that thing that I forgot”. You do that Doug.

How did I know Doug was gonna break something? 🤣

Specimen incubation period??? BLESSIE????

How dare they tease us with Blessie lore?

Good question Doug. Why IS there a harpoon?

Doug literally has no where to hide. 🤣

Oh right. Space. Why do I see that backfiring?

PFFTTT—- Did she just call him a lizard? 🦎

“It’s beautiful” -> “I hate space” poor Doug. I’m sensing a pattern 🤣

Mission Mishaps: You Want, I Solve Ah Doug stealing coffee from Minkowski. Once again, I sense a pattern.

Wait. A puppy? 🥰🐕‍🦺🐾

“The mean lady who runs this place” really Doug? You did just steal her coffee.

2 tails? Well, twice the wagging, I see that as a win. 🥰

Follow him Doug!

IS ZACH VALENTI DOING THE VOICE OF THE DOG?

AS SMEGOL AND GOLLUM FROM LORD OF THE RINGS?

AND IS DOUG HALLUCINATING FROM THE COFFEE???

The dogs are multiplying? David Bowie is here? Okay Doug is hallucinating for sure.

Ah hello Hilbert.

Why is he treating the manual like it’s the ring? 🤣

Well. That was weird.

Oh, Hilbert. All to get Doug to bond with the manual.

And yet something tells me he still won’t read it. It does sound like he might be cuddling with it at night and killing anyone who tries to take it from him though. Mildly concerning. Mission Mishaps: The Veldt Oh my gosh. The episode description. Eiffel goes into the greenhouse… y’all. I don’t wanna get my hopes up, but…

IS THIS BLESSIE CONTENT???? 🪴

I’m so excited guys. I don’t wanna get my hopes up, I know I shouldn’t, but I need Blessie back!

So Doug is doing his chores again. I sense a pattern.

He does a great Australian accent. Again, I need the aliens to clone Doug just so he can have a show where his different personalities talk to each other. Hm. Oxygen chamber has a lot of passwords. And a lot of weird ways to enter passwords. Which is nice for protecting the air, but not so great when you, you know, desperately need air and only have a few seconds to enter the password.

The binary forms of color? This is so extreme not to mention boring. Not one sign of Blessie. I’ve been bamboozled. And WHY is there a timer? This is so weird.

THAT’S IT?

Well I’m upset. We went to the greenhouse and didn’t see leaf or stem of Blessie. 💔

I’m not giving up hope. If not in the show then in fanfic that plant is coming back.

Mission Mishaps: Lights Out

Another entry from dear Doug. I wonder if Minkowski and Hilbert are gonna have him do something he doesn’t want to and then hijinks ensues and Doug messes something up?

HP Lovecraft, Call of Kuthulu? Oh me too Doug stuff is hard to pronounce.

Doug does a good creepy narrator voice. It’s funny to think of Hera listening to all this. It reminds me of those people on Lovelace’s crew reading stories together.

“Property of Dr….”

DOCTOR WHO? (A good show, but I’m literally asking the question).

Is it that girl on Lovelace’s crew who liked to read? (I’m sorry it’s hard to keep track of their names).

Ah yes, and the star is acting up. As is Doug’s imagination. I’m sure this couldn’t possibly go wrong.

Hilbert. What sample? What escaped?

I’m not getting my hopes up this time. You teased me with Blessie once. I’m not falling for it again. I’ve been burned before.

It just sounds like a little mouse. 🐁

…I hope it’s not one of the spiders… I’m now beginning to realize Doug’s fears…

“It’s small and scurrying”

Is it a mouse?

Doug, it’s probably just a mouse. “It’s staring at me.” Well it’s probably scared too, Doug.

Doug, you better not have killed that poor little mouse.

You killed the maintenance drone Doug? Well that was a wild ride. At first I thought they weren’t gonna go the “Doug messes up a thing Hilbert and Minkowski are doing” route but they always surprise me with their ability to bring it back there. Not that I’m complaining, I’m loving these stories. Mission Mishaps: Cold Turkey More Doug! Wow. 553 days. That’s… that’s a lot.

Thanksgiving? Is this the same Thanksgiving from Hera’s memory? 🦃

Banned from the kitchen? Oh poor, Doug. Was Hilbert not available? I guess he’s Russian so he doesn’t celebrate it. But he can probably cook.

Doug is just like me fr. Don’t ask my partner what happened when I tried to make him food. All you need to know was that I tried my best, and it’s the thought that counts.

Doug is gonna burn this Turkey. I know the actress was probably busy and these are “extra” episodes, but Hera please come online and help him.

Oh gross. Cans of spam? Disgusting.

Right, maybe Hilbert can do something. But on the other hand, Hilbert and Eiffel can make each other worse. And what was that about psychoactive properties? What was Hilbert exposed to?

“Can I give indifference? I have plenty of that.” Yes, Hilbert, you made that very clear.

“Oh well if I have to “come on”.” “Really!” “No.” Hilbert is lowkey hilarious 🤣 “I like pecan pie…maybe thanksgiving is not so terrible.” 🥧

I love how Hilbert sounds like he’s plotting something ominous even when he’s just talking about pie. 🤣

But seriously, why was he in Texas? He never answered that.

“The best way to keep him away from the kitchen was to put you in charge” oh poor Doug. She was right though.

Aw, this is sweet. I like how it connects to what we saw in Hera’s memories too.

Mission Mishaps: No Complaints Aw man, SI-5? What happened to Doug?

First they take Blessie from me then they force me to spent time with his killers.

Well gang, I guess it’s time for the adventures of Whiskey Man and Duck Boy.

Wow. Sitting in a car and brooding in the rain. An action packed adventure if I’ve ever heard one.

Oh wait, are they stalking Maxwell? They said she was from a small town.

“Did you stalk me?” Yes, he did Jacobi. Kepler was acting so creepy at that bar, I’m sorry. What even was that?

“I really hate you sometimes sir. ✨You’re the worst✨” oh Duck Boy you have no idea.

THE DUCK THING? OH NO PLEASE TELL US ABOUT THE DUCK THING.

What video. WHAT VIDEO.

Please tell us why Jacobi is brooding and PLEASE tell us about the duck video.

Jacobi taught him questions only? Wow he really does love to dig his own grave.

Kepler is not your friend Jacobi. If you think he is, you… gosh you really need to meet somebody. Anybody.

All this complaining… Jacobi really is the evil version of Doug sometimes…

What was on Jacobi’s mind? What did Rachel think was on his mind? Oh, his one year recruitment.

Nothing good ever comes out of a mysterious duffel bag. Why does he have all those fireworks?

When your evil boss takes you on a fake stake out and gives you some fireworks to blow up because he knows you crave destruction: 💣🎆🥰🎇🧨😍

I like that they play fireworks sounds as they roll the credits. It’s a nice touch. Mission Mishaps: Happy Holidays Already down to the last one. Time flies when you’re having fun. Oh more SI-5. Hopefully a little less Whiskey Boy, a little more Duck related lore.

Oh no such luck. :(

Geez, Kepler really does love flexing every single bit of power that he has, doesn’t he? Just get to the point already! Why couldn’t he have been the one to go instead of Maxwell?

“Oh no! Not a binary fault in the quartical… um… that’s bad!” Duck Boy stop being funny I don’t want to like you.

Not Kepler’s slow claps… I swear this man is infatuated with the idea of being a super villain.

What are they afraid of?

…

A holiday party?

the evil space corporation has a HOLIDAY PARTY?

For what holiday? Cutter and Pryce clearly hate holidays. They’ve ordered people killed on nearly every holiday we’ve seen! … actually maybe that’s their way of making the holidays their own… and it makes me wonder who they want to kill at this party. Jacobi and Maxwell have a right to be concerned about this.

“We don’t ask questions. We trust that we were given orders for a reason.” THAT ONLY WORKS IF YOU ARE WORKING FOR TRUSTWORTHY PEOPLE. And committing or endorsing murder takes you off the trustworthy list.

The idea of Cutter and Pryce celebrating Christmas disgusts me. Like, physically I have a hard time stomaching it. Christmas is about joy, and love, and goodwill toward mankind. Cutter and his crazy science gf have no place involving themselves in that. Not unless they show some serious remorse and do some serious penance and jail time.

SECRET SANTA EXCHANGE?

What kind of horrifying messed up gifts do people get each other? I hope Jacobi gets a pet duck.

… Maxwell’s mom died? “We all know you don’t talk to your mom” “…my mom just died?” “No Jacobi.” STOP BEING FUNNY.

Compare this to the holiday stuff that happens with the Hephaestus… this has such a creepy undertone. Especially when you imagine the events happening at the same time.

Well, that’s all for the Mission Mishaps. Sorry it took me so long guys, but I love and appreciate your patience. Excited to finish the rest of the series and hopefully I’ll have more for you soon!

[light-lanterne]

I feel like- even tho Hopper is a H U G E mess in cannon, he is, hopefully, redeemable.

However, it is so unfair that Mike, who is a child, is hated more than him, aka a grown ass man who definitely should know better (regardless of the time the show is set in)

ugh, don't even get me started on that,,, i feel like half of the people who despise mike do it because his mishaps tend to revolve around fan favourites (el is the gp's favourite, will is definitely a fandom sweetheart), whereas the other half hate him because he's supposed to be the relatable, self-insert character for a lot of these people and he's just not the perfect character they wish him to be; the version of his character these people would like to envision themselves being (aka the nerd who somehow got this superpowered girl as his girlfriend and she needs him and he's somehow going to save the world (which is not at all what any of the character arcs are supposed to be about, hence their disappointment)).

in both cases it all comes down to people (purposefully or not) misunderstanding mike's character, looking at him only superficially, and getting frustrated when he doesn't act the way they'd want him to, be it in his relationship to other characters or when it comes to the narrative.

now, on the other hand, we have hopper, who is just as complex of a character as mike (which inherently makes him harder to understand, therefore unlikeable to some) and who objectively has a lot of unfavourable traits (mainly, he's a cop e.e)

however, most of hop's mistakes get treated either as comedy and/or classic film tropes, or they get a genuine resolution to them, either by him admitting to his faults (like in s2) or by giving context to his behaviour (like in s4), a grace mike hasn't been bestowed with as of s4. this inherently makes him more sympathetic than mike to a lot of people, as excruciatingly frustrating as that is >.<

plus, hopper is the action hero of the show and people tend to ignore character flaws in favour of enjoying the cool action sequences and heroics, so there's that too x.x

anyway,,, i ended up writing a whole thing even though i said i wouldn't :S sorry about that. just know that i share your frustration (clearly) and that i shall defend mike wheeler forever because his character doesn't deserve all the crap he gets >:(

thank you for the ask ~ again, apologies for going on this random rant x.x i hope you have a great day / night !!

[darkmetaknightspussy]

iirc hulkjeet is baljeet from phineas & ferb with hulk's powers after a mishap with a superpower restoring machine

i have no strong feelings on hulkjeet i think

[wamb-revamped]

A *realistic* conversation between boyfriends in the polyamorous Au (generated by AI because I’m lazy also I’m not reading it until I posted so I hope it’s good)

Thrilling Pink: Hey, my magical crew! How's everyone feeling today?

Rowdy Blue: Oh, you know me, always ready to cause some chaos and save the day! What about you, Cobalt? Any magical mishaps lately?

Cobalt: Well, I did accidentally turn my breakfast into a flock of flamingos this morning. It was quite a sight!

Nyan Orange: Flamingos? That's nothing compared to the time I accidentally summoned a herd of rainbow unicorns in the middle of the city!

Soft Ivory: (giggles) You two and your magical misadventures. Remember when we all got stuck in that time loop? It was like Groundhog Day on steroids!

Thrilling Pink: Ah, memories! But let's not forget the most important thing – our love for each other. Being in this polyamorous relationship brings so much joy and strength to our superpowered lives.

Rowdy Blue: Absolutely! We're a team on and off the battlefield. Together, we're invincible.

Cobalt: And with our unique powers combined, we bring a whole new level of magic to the world. It's an honor to fight alongside all of you.

Nyan Orange: (playfully) Just don't forget, I'm the sparkliest of them all! I bring the extra pizzazz to our superhero shenanigans.

Soft Ivory: (smiling) And you bring so much more than just sparkles, my dear. Your energy lights up our lives.

Thrilling Pink: Let's remember to use our powers for good, support each other, and spread love wherever we go. Together, we'll make this world a brighter, more magical place!

All: To infinity and beyond!

[queen-of-writing-bad-things]

Henry Danger Reader Insert | Captain Man x Reader: SEASON 5

Episode 9: Broken Armed and Dangerous

Life in the Man Cave had resumed being like it ever was. Not normal, life in those four walls was never normal, not with Ray and his bad decisions, Schwoz and his mad experiments, Jasper with his weird comments, and the endless exasperation of (y/n), Henry and Charlotte.

Nevertheless, after the escapade with Rick Twitler, they'd fallen back into the same rhythm that they'd always worked to; fun, laughter and a few fights in between. Of course, Henry was still getting used to being stripped of his superpowers and there had been a few mishaps during emergencies where his reaction times hadn't been great since everything was so much slower now. He was trying his best, bless his little heart, and things had been going fine for the most part...until today, that is.

"In our number two story tonight, The Playground Pooper has struck again," Mary Gaperman reported as Jasper, Charlotte and Schwoz giggled at the news. As always when Captain Man and his sidekicks were out on a mission, they were left to sit around and do nothing--or watch the news and eat sorbet from tennis balls. Y'know, something normal. 

"The Swellview Police suddenly have more doodies than usual because someone or something has been using Swellview playgrounds every night as a toilet," Trent went on, resulting in more laughter from the three. It wasn't the most serious crime, even if it was disgusting for the parents who had very curious toddlers in the sandpit the next day but the way they were reporting this pooper was hilarious. Was it on purpose or were they oblivious to every pun they made related to poo?

"Police have piles of evidence, but have yet to arrest the prankster, despite being flushed with clues."

"Has the news always been this funny?" Jasper asked as he ate another spoonful of sorbet and his friends laughed and shrugged. If it was always this funny, they'd watch more often since nothing fun ever happened when the heroes were out saving people. Good thing they were back then.

As they carried on eating, the tubes beeped and dropped, bringing down Ray with (y/n) in his embrace, nothing out of the ordinary there, and a rather glum-looking Henry, who was clutching his arm. And with their arrival came a problem, not that the helpers were interested.

"We got a bad situation here, people," (y/n) announced as she helped Henry down the stairs, her hand in the small of his back so he didn't trip and hurt himself even more than he already was. There had been a small incident during their time away and it was no laughing matter judging by how the kid kept wincing with every jolt or movement. And understandably, Ray was just as concerned as his sweet girl, although not as focused, unfortunately.

"We know... The Playground Pooper has struck again," Charlotte stood up, folded her arms and replied in a dark, serious tone that mocked the gravity of the real situation. In fairness to her, she didn't know that her friend needed some genuine assistance urgently, otherwise, she probably wouldn't have been so jovial, but her playfulness caused Ray's eyes to light up at the name of his new favourite lowlife and instantly, Henry didn't matter as much.

"No way! Really?!" the hero barked out, laughing with his helpers when he heard about the weirdo who couldn't stop crapping in public, but neither Kid nor Miss Danger was in a joking mood. Did the sight of him holding his left arm to his chest not mean anything to them?

"Ummm, no, actually it's a little bit of a different bad situation--ow!"

"Shhh! I wanna hear this!" Ray interrupted his youngest sidekick so he could hear the news report, not even blinking when he whacked the kid's poor arm despite his injury. (y/n) glared at her adorable idiot for being so mean and absentminded because the resulting groan from him and any possible aggravation to the injury made her heart sore. 

"Raymond, we've got bigger prob--hey!" she went to scold him, prodding his arm as he sat down on the arm of the couch and stared at the monitor happily. His attention was fully trained on what the news anchors were saying, but that didn't stop him from seizing her body with an iron grip and dragging her onto his knee, thinking that the amusing story could only get better if he hugged his sweet girl to his chest and laughed with her. And normally, (y/n) would love to laugh with him, if Henry wasn't in serious pain.

"Police have no idea who is doing the dumping; an angry teen, a large baby, Mary. No one knows."

"It's a real poo-dunnit," Mary smiled and they all laughed at her little joke, well, everyone apart from Henry, who wrinkled his nose when he saw that (y/n) was trying to fight off a smile. Oh, come on, he got that she and Ray were touchier than ever after nearly losing each other for the fiftieth time but seriously? He dragged her into his arms and now she was losing her focus just because his lips brushed the curve of her ear and the grumbling of his laughter made her tummy feel funny. Talk about no resilience.

"A poo-dunnit... It's probably Jasper," Ray smiled and dropped as he mentioned his guess, much to the boy's shock and annoyance. Who said anything about it being him? He wasn't depraved or an animal, weird, yes, a wrong-un, no.

"What?!"

"I was just gonna going to say that!" Schwoz agreed with his boss, which was a bit ironic given how weird he was himself. He was strange but Jasper had a specific type of weirdness, one that screamed pooping in public when no one was around but he'd never do that, not since he'd outgrown most of his weirdness. 

"It's not me!"

"I don't know, Jasper...it just smells like something you'd do," Charlotte joked, causing another round of laughter from the group as they teased the boy. He wasn't best pleased and neither was Henry, who could swear that the throbbing was getting worse and giving him a headache, or maybe that was merely the frustrating lack of help.

"That's actually really funny, that's actually really funny--all right, joke's over," Jasper pouted and walked away from the couch with a bruised ego. They could laugh all they wanted, the only thing he did at night was sleep, not go off doing his business in playgrounds.

"I'm not joking, I seriously think it's you," Ray replied in one of the most serious voices (y/n) had ever heard him use, one that was only reserved for when he seriously needed to say sorry or if he was deadly serious about something. 

"Okay, guys, can we focus on what happened to me, please?" Henry tried again, appealing to (y/n) by meeting her gaze as she turned in Ray's arms in a bid for freedom. He was still clingy and she had no choice but to slouch against him again but she could at least put a word in for the kid. After all, Ray only ever properly listened to her.

"Raymond, we should focus on Henry and—oh, look! They're talking about you, that's kinda freaky..." the woman trailed off when her point became useless as Trent and Mary moved onto the next big story of the night, which just so happened to hit closer to home, unlike the Playground Pooper. 

Ray grinned and slapped the kid's arm again, delighted that his sidekick was in the news because any publicity is good publicity, right? It made (y/n) glare at him again but with his nose pushed into her hair and his eyes trained on the monitor, he couldn't see his mistake. What a doofus.

"In non-funny news, witnesses say that Kid Danger, while teaming up with Captain Man and Miss Danger to fight super-criminal, Doctor Karaté, broke his arm this evening," Mary reported, causing everyone not in the know to look at Henry in horror. No wonder he was holding his arm like that, the poor kid had taken a serious beating and was now seriously hurt. 

Everyone had seen it happen and Captain Man may or may not have had a slight panic attack about his youngest sidekick being hurt, which resulted in Miss Danger having to keep calm and reassure him that it wasn't too bad. The only bad thing was how quickly the paps seemed to pick up on it.

"You broke your arm?!" Jasper asked his friend, a gasp escaping his mouth at the shock and horror. His dear best friend, wounded and hurt, didn't serve thinking about it. 

"That's what I've been trying to tell you guys!" Henry exclaimed, feeling beyond frustrated that it was only now that he could explain what had happened during what should have been a normal, bog-standard mission, " Doctor Karaté karate-chopped my arm."

"I bet you wish you still had your superpower," Jasper noted, unintentionally rubbing salt in the wound for Henry, who was still a tad bitter about losing his power but he hadn't let it bother him until now. There was nothing he could do, so there was no point in feeling sorry for himself, but come on, it sucked when someone made it worse when he was trying his best.

"Yeah."

"Because if you still had your super-fast reflexes, you could have just...moved out of the way!"

"All right, I got it!" The boy snapped at his friend. It wasn't like Henry to get irate but Jasper was kinda asking for it with his subtle taunts.

"Hey, snappy, calm down...we've had enough flying fists for one night," (y/n) told him, freeing herself from Ray's deadlocked embrace to place a comforting hand on his shoulder. She still had one arm around her waist, keeping her close—joined-at-the-hip close—but the gesture was enough for Henry to ignore how clingy his boss was being tonight. The kid was beaten up enough, there was no need for conflict to be brought home and certainly not between best friends.

"You guys, this is really bad," Charlotte said as Schwoz waddled over to examine Henry's arm—not that he didn't trust Miss Danger's eye for injuries, but a second opinion never hurt. For some reason unknown to everyone else, the girl looked perturbed as if she'd realised something no one else had, not even her fellow smarty-pants. To be fair, it had been a stressful night and no one can clock on to everything.

"It's just a broken arm," Schwoz told her as he poked it. He didn't understand her tone; in his mind, he thought she was worried about the severity of the injury, not any repercussions because of it. "We'll cut it off, it'll grow right back."

"What?! No!" Henry blanched at the prognosis and treatment, his terrified eyes looking for (y/n) for help since she was the best nurse he'd ever had. He loved his arm, he hadn't finished with it yet and he sure as hell hoped she wouldn't let the funny bald guy cut it off. They weren't gonna do that, were they?

"That's not how arms work, Schwoz! Geez, where'd you get your science degree? A thrift store?" The woman gave him a funny look because no scientist had ever learned that in school. Maybe it came from his long, lonely stints in the lab where he'd experiment until the early hours with mutants and freaks, sewing arms onto legs and legs onto heads—things everyone else tended to avoid. They didn't ask and he didn't say, so perhaps he was getting his biology mixed up.

"Oh, right, that's a starfish..." Schwoz nodded with an understanding smile, having realised his mistake. Weirdo. What starfish had he been messing with? And why did Henry trigger the same knowledge? As the others pondered his peculiar habits, Charlotte stepped forward, feeling the same burn in her chest as Henry had—the need to shout something out so it didn't eat her alive.

"Listen! What's bad is that if everyone in Swellview knows that Kid Danger broke his arm tonight, then Henry Hart suddenly shows up tomorrow morning with a broken arm, then any idiot can put two and two together and figure out that Henry is Kid Danger," she explained and suddenly, a wave of uneasiness came over the group. Well, most of it, only those who took her worry onboard understood her argument.

"She has a point. It certainly looks suspicious and people aren't as stupid as they look," (y/n) added, agreeing with Charlotte because if she had noticed the similarities, surely someone else would too, someone who wasn't in on the secret. They were the right height, age, build, appearance, everything, an observant kid could see that Kid Danger and Henry Hart were the same.

"I don't know... I don't think anyone's going to put anyth—" Schwoz started, his opinion differing from the girls' because it was just one of those worries that would never come to fruition. Henry had been going to school ever since he started working and no one had even come close to seeing the truth. Why was now any different? A broken arm? People are dumb, that wouldn't prove anything.

"I just put two and two together!" Or not. It truly said something about his confidence in the stupidity of the human race when the slowest lady in the city saw the obvious. Seriously, Mary Gaperman outsmarted Schwoz, it couldn't be true.

"Oh, really?"

"Yes! People should look out for a boy about Kid Danger's height, about Kid Danger's age, who has a newly broken arm, because that boy would be..." For once in her life, and to Trent's amazement, Mary was on the verge of a breakthrough, her grey cells working harder than ever to come to an astounding conclusion. Everyone was on edge but whilst some citizens were desperate to hear her big theory, the Man Cave team were hoping a meteorite hit the news studio in the next three seconds. 

"Keep going, Mary..."

"No, stay right where you are, Mary. Keep your mouth shut..." (y/n) begged silently, hoping that the woman, who she'd always been quite fond of, would hear her plea. It had been a long night and they still had to set Henry's arm, she didn't fancy having a possible exposure situation involving every kid at Swellview High knowing who Kid Danger was.

"The Playground Pooper?" Mary offered her co-host, who winced at her inability to complete her brilliant moment. Ray and his family breathed a sigh of relief at the small miracle, thanking the universe for making Mary so dim-witted because it had saved them a heap of trouble. It wasn't very exciting for the tabloids but what they didn't know, wouldn't hurt them—or anyone else.

"Oooh, so close! No, Mary, that boy would be Kid Danger." And just like that, Trent took their miracle and tore it into little pieces, something that was so delightful for him because who doesn't like a juicy story?

They groaned, they shouted, they stomped their feet because Charlotte had been right, any idiot could see the correlation and now there was gonna be a damn witch-hunt for the kid who turned up to school with a cast.

"See?!"

"Okay, we have a big problem on our hands." Schwoz conceded. Yeah, now he agreed with her, now it was too late to do anything. 

"I agree. How are we going to get Jasper to stop pooping in playgrounds?" Ray joked, his small way of breaking the ice in the grave moment. (y/n) gave him a small smile for his effort, just enough to make it worth it because a pouty fiancé was no fun and if Henry's identity wasn't at risk then it would've been quite funny if a little infuriating for the kid being mocked.

"It's not me!" It probably wasn't Jasper, they knew he was a freak but he wasn't that big of a freak. No, he was innocent but winding him up was so much fun that they weren't gonna stop poking fun just yet. After all, the jokes didn't stink that bad.

~

First things first. Get Henry's arm fixed. 

Not even Schwoz had the technology to magically get it back to normal straight away, at least not in a way that Henry was comfortable with, so as he scanned the broken bone, he and (y/n) (the supervising nurse), agreed to go for something more traditional. 

A simple, plain cast that would hold the bone in place as it healed would do fine and whilst it would be difficult to explain to his family, Henry was happy with that option. It didn't involve amputation or fire or exsanguination so it was fine—plus, it was kinda cool to see his injury flash up on Schwoz's monitor.

"That thing detect muscles too, Schwoz? 'Cause I'm looking at Henry's arm and I'm not seeing any," Ray teased as he loitered around the couch, observing his sidekick as he longed out of uniform and allowed Schwoz to scan his arm. He was bored, that much was obvious, and he'd taken to making playful jokes at the kid since the scene was so dull and serious. 

Namely, his lack of upper body strength since the kid lacked any kind of bulk given that he was still a child and he, the bulkiest guy around, had muscles to spare—something he was showing off in his tight t-shirt for one lovely-looking nurse.

"Nice. Just broke my arm. Perfect time to start making fun of me," Henry offered his jovial boss a sarcastic smile, not best pleased with how he loved to point out his deficiencies when he was already down. Yeah, he hadn't started bodybuilding yet, and yeah, his wrists still went all the way up his arms, but it didn't mean he couldn't punch a guy in the face for being an ass.

"It was a joke, relax!"

"Don't poke the bear then, Mr Muscles," (y/n) teased her doofus back as she crossed the room just to squeeze his bicep. It was easy for him to make fun of others when he already had the body of a Greek god but he had to remember one thing; he was just as skinny once upon a time. He'd drunk a million protein shakes, pressed a million press-ups and punched a million bad guys to get where he was with his fitness and now he had the right to show off in front of his drooling fiancée, but no right to make fun of the kid who might just out-muscle him one day.

"I'm not poking anything, darlin'. It was funny! Did he break his funny bone too?" The hero smirked and practically became putty in her hands as she not-so-subtly felt his arms and the rippling muscles that he not-so-subtly flexed under her touch. He knew she had a thing for them since they were so big that she couldn't get her hands around them and seeing her so in love with the sight of them was exactly his style.

"Actually, he did!" Schwoz told him, pointing to the screen where he had an x-ray scan of Henry's broken arm and it showed a clean break in a particular bone. 

"Oh, yeah...look, doofus, the break is in his humerus bone," (y/n) pointed out to her lover, making the impossible task of taking her focus away from his hot body in favour of making sure he looked at the scan. The hero stepped past his lover, placing a kiss on her shoulder as he did, and bent over to look at his sidekick's arm because somewhere under the skin, there was the break his smart girl had shown him.

"Oh, yeah! Right there!" He grinned and jabbed the sore arm, which, understandably, pissed the kid off. It wasn't his day.

"Hey! What the heck, dude?! Stop!"

"Where's my finger poking?"

"What are you doing? Who does that? Stop! Stop! You're literally touching the most broken part of my bone right now! Can you stop?! (y/n), control your man-child fiancé!" Henry screeched as Ray prodded his arm, loving how he could see his finger and the bones beneath his skin on the scan whenever he did. It was just a bit of fun for him, but for Henry, each stab was an agonising sting.

"Okay, easy! She doesn't control me..." Ray backed off when the teen got vicious, his hands held up in surrender. Yeah, (y/n) didn't control him, that would be weird but she had some influence, especially when it came to tempt him away from annoying others.

"Stop terrorising the kid, doofus, and come over here," (y/n) smiled at him and dragged the man off to the side so Henry could receive Schwoz's treatment in peace. Reaching up on her tiptoes, the woman brought her lover into a gentle kiss, sighing happily when those arms that he loved to show off wrapped around her small form. That would keep him quiet for long enough as he refused to let go, only venturing deeper for the taste of honey.

"Ugh, gross...what are we doing? What's the plan?" Henry wrinkled his nose at the sight of them but didn't look a gift horse in the mouth and so moved on very quickly. If (y/n) could keep Ray entertained then who was he to stop that, even if the way he crowded her seemed to be a little overbearing? She seemed to like it, after all, she hadn't even swatted away his hands on her...yet. If they couldn't get a room, maybe he'd shove them into one.

"The plan is...you blow a bubble and fix your arm trouble," Schwoz replied, ignoring whatever were those strange noises that were coming from behind him, no doubt from the handsy hero as he ate the face of his quivering sweet girl. Give him strength, it was only his clever pun that gave him the strength to go on...or whip out his altar for them to get the marriage thing over and done with now.

"See? I can do rhymes too.."

"Pfff! Big—deal, you did a—rhyme. I do them all the..." Ray mumbled in between kisses and rolled his eyes when he noticed that Schwoz was giving him a mean glare. What? He couldn't help it if the sight of his floppy hair, tight shirt and huge biceps made his sweet girl want to kiss him and he couldn't help it if her just being her made him want to find a flat surface and revert to his caveman instincts. Was it really that bad to be in love with the woman he was going to spend the rest of his life with?

"Come on, doof, you can do it."

"...Every day." So close and yet so far. (y/n) giggled as Ray fell at the last hurdle, proving that whilst he was the cool hero, his quips weren't always the best, which was probably why he often spent hours coming up with them with his precious girl when they were tucked up in bed and too tired to do...other things.

"You're adorable, Raymond. Y'know that?" The woman in his arms remarked and sealed their lips again as his ears turned pink. Ignoring the loved-up couple once more, albeit, with a hidden smile on his face, Henry blew the bubble that Schwoz had handed to him; a simple yet effective method of getting a cast on his arm. It materialised, plaster wrapped with blue gauze and despite it already being a few seconds, Henry's arm felt better already.

"Hey, whoa!" "Nice cast, Schwoz! This problem is...solved!" Ray grinned, wandering over to inspect the new addition to Henry's outfit. He hadn't learnt his lesson, not at all, as he slapped the cast for good measure, and despite the solid plaster, the resounding thunk was still painful for Henry and his tender arm. He'd not pull any more faces if the kissing came back, kissing meant his arm wasn't a target.

"Ow! This problem is not solved," he winced but stayed focused on how they'd dealt with his arm, but not the big issue that they'd all been worried about. Had the kiss fried his brain or could he genuinely not remember?

"Why not?" Or maybe he was just stupid. Henry had long suspected that his boss wasn't playing with a full deck but now it was confirmed. He was dumb and a terrible listener, something which worsened when there was a certain pretty girl around.

"Because, doofus, if people see that Henry broke his arm, then they'll know he's Kid Danger, remember?"

"Oh, yeahhhh! You're so smart, sweet girl..." (y/n) blushed as Ray gave her his dopiest smile and trailed kisses across her cheek to her lips, a well-deserved reward, he thought, for the girl who kept him in line when he was being an idiot. He couldn't help himself, not when she was standing there, looking all pretty and sweet and perfect, and not when she'd been biting her lip non-stop the moment he changed out of his uniform and into the shirt he'd bought two sizes too small for him.

"Dude! How am I gonna hide this cast until my arm heals?" Henry butted in. They were going to be soon, couldn't this wait? Then, they'd have all night to do whatever floated their boat, so all he wanted right now, was a few minutes of their time to come up with a sensible plan. One that Ray wasn't gonna find at the back of (y/n)'s throat, so there was no point in looking there.

"Ugh! Easy!... We break Henry's other arm."

"Doofus..." Being interrupted didn't go down very well with the hero, who now had a ridiculous idea in his head and no warning note in his fiancée's voice was gonna shut him up as he dragged her towards the couch. If he could kiss her like he sorely wanted to, then he'd offer up his ideas, even if they weren't very good.

"So, he'll have two broken arms and that way, nobody will think he's Kid Danger. This problem is...solved," Ray smirked and flopped down onto the couch next to Henry, who gave him a bored look as he pulled his sweet girl into his lap too. He expected to be allowed to resume their activities, tonsil tennis mainly, but for once, (y/n) jerked her head away from his when he went in for another kiss, meaning his lips landed on her jawline instead. Hell, he could work with that, it often lead to something more than kisses anyway.

"You're not breaking my arm, dude," Henry said firmly, watching with squinted eyes as Ray spread his legs even further to try and coax (y/n) into his chest more, his attention on her than anything else. It was just one of those nights, he was feeling touchy, but the stupidity of breaking another arm didn't fix the problem, it made it worse.

"Okay, Schwoz'll do it."

"Raymond—Ray—okay, stop!" (y/n) scolded him in between giggles as his nose tickled its way down the column of her neck and tried to brush against her own. She had an excellent point and whilst she'd love nothing more than to bask in his attention, there was a serious floor in his plan. 

"Don't you think that if Henry Hart turns up with two broken arms, then it'll be exactly the same when Kid Danger also turns up with two broken arms? Either way, the problem won't go away with your plan."

"Oh, yeah..." Ray looked slightly downcast as he realised what she was saying but immediately perked up when she pressed a kiss to the tip of his nose to cheer him up. It wasn't the best idea ever, but he was trying and that warmed her heart anyway. 

"I have a different plan," Schwoz announced and smiled at them as he too tapped Henry's arm, causing the boy to wince yet again. When were people gonna realise that doing that caused him severe pain? At least it was fleeting, that was a bonus, and he quickly forgot about the agony shooting up his arm as Charlotte and Jasper appeared from the sprocket carrying...stuff. The genius had sent them on a small mission to find a few things for him, all of which he hoped would help Henry blag his way through the healing process.

"Hey, I found the case of fake arms!" Jasper yelled as he trotted down the steps with the large silver case that was full of prosthetics, which would hopefully provide them with a semi-decent solution to the kid's problem. 

"Where was it?"

"Right by that big jar of real legs," the boy replied, causing (y/n) to shiver in Ray's arms at the thought of what the handyman kept in storage. There weren't many rooms that she didn't like going in but that was definitely one of them—real pickled legs were just too freaky for her.

"Why do you have a jar of real legs?" Henry questioned, getting the same sense of freakiness as Ray hugged his fiancée tighter, anything to make her feel better. He wouldn't let her go in that room, he preferred to keep her happy and if need be, he'd suck up his fears and go into the leg room.

"A guy owed me twenty bucks. He paid me in legs," Schwoz answered, proving that he was a bigger weirdo than Henry originally thought and leaving him wishing he hadn't asked. What sort of guys did Schwoz talk to? Were there people out there who were missing legs that were actually in the Man Cave? So many questions...

"And this is the biggest sweater I could find. It was just in a drawer, not near any body parts, thank God." Charlotte moved on and tossed an alarmingly large sweater to Schwoz. It was so large that it could only be one person's and luckily for Henry, it wasn't contaminated by anything human.

"Okay, we give Henry one of these fake arms, then we hide his cast with a sweater from when Ray really loved horses," the genius explained, holding out the freakishly large sweater, patterned with two galloping horses in a desert scene. Honestly, it was a bit hideous, not because the horses were ugly or anything but it was quite gauche, gaudy, maybe even tacky by some people, and (y/n) had never been more thankful for anything that Ray's weird obsession had been nothing more than a phase. 

Was it three or four years ago? Maybe five, back when she'd wait up for her best friend and find him coming home all hot and sweaty from his time with the horses because Captain Man loved a challenge and the stallions gave him one. He'd bought horse bed sheets, horse mugs, horse shoes, horse t-shirts, horse sweaters, even a horse alarm clock and he wondered why their friendship had been a little tense for those few, agonisingly long months. Seriously, she thought she was losing her doofus to an animal.

"Oh, yeah, I used to race 'em. They always beat me, though," the man replied, earning himself a few funny looks when he added the second part. Gone was the prestige of being involved in horse racing and in came the judgement of a guy who was so stubborn and boastful that he thought he could run at forty miles per hour. 

"Oh, Raymond. You're so adorable sometimes—even if the damn horses drove me insane," (y/n) pinched his cheeks as she would with a cute child, finding him even more irresistible when he squirmed and blushed. He'd had a million phases since that one, ranging from fad diets to train-spotting, and every time, she tolerated and encouraged his hobbies until he moved on to the next. 

The important thing was that she remained a constant, a passion he could never shake, not that he'd ever want to; he knew that for all his flaws, his sweet girl was here to stay.

"Okay, I've got a lot of arm options for you but we have to find just the right one. Soooo, fake arm fashion show!" Schwoz exclaimed and began waving two of his fake arms around as Jasper, Ray, (y/n) and Charlotte cheered. Henry looked rather confused as he clapped them underneath his leg because what the hell was happening? Couldn't he just have a look?

Of course not, fashion shows were exciting and they gave his friends a chance to judge his every move as they worked through the case for something excellent. He didn't have much of a choice.

~

The stage was set. The screen had been erected so Henry could shove the arm into the sweater and he was ready to show off his first choice. The sweater was big and comfy, so that posed no problems. The only concern he had was for how...shit the arm looked as it was pinned to the sleeve. Well, that and how he looked like a true saddo with his little horsies on his chest as it wasn't the most subtle garment, more like a magnet for school bullies.

Apart from that, however, the arm was in place and as long as no one looked too close and he didn't shake the brace that held it to his body too much, it should be fine. Time to show his friends.

The group sat on the couch waiting with bated breath as they sipped on their fancy sodas through curly straws. Jasper, Charlotte and (y/n) were sat on the couch, poised for some serious judging as Schwoz and Ray stood behind them, leaning on the back with the latter resting his chin on the shoulder of the woman in front of him. He couldn't wait to whisper nonsense about the show in her ear and see her shiver but as Henry stepped out, the electricity in the room seemed to fizzle out.

"Hey..."

"That works..."

"Oh, yeah."

"I like it. It's a ten-out-of-ten arm," they ad-libbed, admiring how from a distance (and if they squinted their eyes a bit), the arm looked real. Maybe a bit plastic-y and awkward given the angle it fell from the sleeve but apart from that and the fact that he could pick anything up, it looked great. No improvement was needed, which was a bit of a disappointment since there was no need to carry on now that they'd found the perfect prosthetic.

"Seems good," Henry stated, feeling comfortable with his new-fake arm, even if his cast was getting pretty warm and itchy under the cheap sweater, and he could see the puzzled, disappointed faces of his friends when they realised that the show was over before it began.

"Man, I really thought that would take longer," Charlotte said as she swirled her drink with her straw. What were the odds that the first arm out of the case would be the one they were looking for?

"Me too, but you know, sometimes, the first arm just feels right," Ray replied and with a final peck on his sweet girl's cheek, stood up now that they had nothing to watch, which was a shame given that his opportunity to flirt had gone down the metaphorical toilet. 

"Yep, first arm's always right."

"That is what they say."

"Who actually says that?"

"So, once again, this problem is...solved," the hero reiterated, smirking at his youngest sidekick now that they'd found a solution to the problem, meaning he didn't have to worry about it and therefore, he could focus on other things...like whisking (y/n) away to somewhere more private. But, as always, it wasn't that simple, because even though he'd fastened and secured the arm in place as Schwoz had shown him, Henry could feel how clunky and surreal the thing was as it poked him in the ribs.

"Uh, once again, the problem is not solved. I mean, dude, this sweater and fake arm might work for, like, a day but it's not gonna fool people for long. I mean, look at this thing," the kid argued and proved his point by swinging his body to show how the arm didn't naturally follow his movements, it just floundered in the air and stuck out like a sore thumb. Without a doubt, someone at school or in his family was gonna see the latex and realise the truth—what then?

"Try tucking it into your pocket. That way, it won't flap about the place," (y/n) suggested, thinking that if the arm was secured in a natural position, it would look more real. Plus, it would be less likely to get snagged on something, so Henry was inclined to follow her sound advice, that is until Ray decided to make a madness out of it.

"Or, hook your thumb through your belt loop. That's what I do whenever I want to look cool and tough. I mean, one look of me like this and I was engaged to be married," the hero smirked as he stood there with his fingers dangling from his waistband and (y/n) scoffed a laugh at his outrageous joking. Sure, in his dreams; whilst she had to admit that any pose he did was cute, this one wasn't it. He looked awkward and like a doofus, and it wasn't what made her agree to marry him. That was a long list ranging from his floppy hair to his goofy personality; belt loops be damned.

"Keep telling yourself that, Ra—"

"Oh, yeah! Just try this, Henry," Jasper, being the suck-up and bonehead he was, jumped in to back his boss up, believing that the ridiculous pose was something to be proud of, something that made them edgy, something that made them appeal to girls. The boy needed more appeal than the elder, but even he felt epic as he pushed out his pelvis and leaned back with a cocky smirk on his face. He only had one girl to impress but even though she loved the sight of him in that shirt, he looked so silly.

"You look cool, man."

"Yeah, you look cool too. What's up?" They complimented each other as they obnoxiously exaggerated their thumbs poking through the denim, wiggling their hips and flaring their fingers so they looked like idiots. Yeah, Henry wasn't gonna do that, he wanted to attract girls, not scare them off.

"Yeah, I'm not doing that."

"Your loss." Ray shrugged and turned to smirk at his sweet girl, who was shaking her head with a soft smile. He was a dork, but he was her dork, and having him looming over her wasn't so bad. As long as Charlotte was on-hand to stop Henry from doing something idiotic, she could admire him as much as she wanted and long for the minute they were free to go to bed.

"Or...tomorrow morning, at school, we stage a fake accident where Henry can pretend to break his fake arm in front of everyone," the teen girl shared her plan and for once, it was a genuinely sensible one. No craziness, no far-fetched details, nothing that could go wrong and Henry liked the sound of it because whilst he loved some of Ray's insane ideas, sometimes, they were a bit much. After everything that had happened that night, he just wanted to get this problem solved without any more problems.

"Yes! Then, I'll have an excuse for my broken arm and people won't think I'm Kid Danger."

"Exactly! And, we do something simple, like Jasper accidentally closes your fake arm into his locker. Done," Charlotte suggested and it was like music to Henry's ears. He liked the sound of that, no frills, no lace, no fancy, unnecessary bits, just a straightforward accident that could be explained in such a dull way that no one would question it. Perfect.

"Problem actually solved."

"Perfect."

"I like it."

"Good, we don't want any more accidents around here," the group were all in agreement; it was a great plan. Schwoz, Henry, Charlotte, Jasper and (y/n) were ready to get the plan going, meaning the kids would be left to sort it out themselves since it would be highly weird for a happily engaged couple and their oddball handyman to show up at a high school. Extremely weird. 

Therefore, it would be best to let them get on with it, after all, fewer people meant fewer complications, which someone should've told Ray.

"Yawn," he added to the end of their happy chittering, meaning they couldn't leave the problem there because he, the boss, the guy in charge, wasn't satisfied, much to (y/n)'s confusion and slight annoyance. What had his panties in a bunch now?

"Uh, what?"

"Doofus, what's up with you?" The sidekicks looked at him with bored expressions as the man sucked up the last of his drink. He had that expression on his face that told his precious girl that he thought that he knew best, which everyone knew was never the case. It was very rare for Ray Manchester to have an intellectual advantage over someone else and it was almost certain that he wasn't thinking with his brain, more like with his ego.

"Oh, I said yawn because that plan puts me to sleep," Ray replied rather arrogantly and (y/n)'s adoring looks turned sour.

"Uh, I'm sorry?" Charlotte, however, hadn't had the years of experience that she had, and hadn't figured out a method for breaking through his pigheadedness, so for her, his abrasive argument was a bit shocking. Almost as if she couldn't believe her ears.

"I mean...it's boring! It'll work, probably great...but where's the funny?" He asked, fingertips touching fingertips in a cocky pose as he looked down at the girl from his high horse, something that didn't sit well with his fiancée. Did he want to get some tonight or was he deliberately trying to be obnoxious? Why did everything have to be funny? It didn't make sense; sometimes, it's better to get the problem over and done with, rather than messing with it until it's even bigger than it was to begin with.

"Raymond, we're not trying to be funny."

"Uh, mission accomplished, sweet girl," he booped her nose, causing her to wrinkle it up in a way that he found adorable, especially when it was paired with her moody pout. He didn't mean to cause any aggro, but he was certain that they could do this a different way, one that result in a school incident that was so hilarious it would go down in the history books. Maybe it was because he never got the chance to be a school prankster, a class clown, or anything school related, perhaps he wanted to live that childhood experience whilst he still could. After all, it's not like the kids would be around forever.

"I got a better, funnier idea."

"Fine, come on, then. Let's hear your big idea, doofus," (y/n) sighed and crossed her arms, looking at him tiredly through her lashes. She could predict what was about to come out of his mouth; bold, outlandish, stupid, possibly dangerous, ridiculous. Definitely ridiculous. She loved him, but by god, she wanted to tie him up and gag his dumb mouth before he said or did something they'd all regret.

"Still got that trebuchet?" The hero didn't reply to her, rather, he turned to Schwoz and that mischievous smirk grew on his face. The mention of the medieval invention caused them both to sneak and chuckle with planned wickedness because for those who knew what a trebuchet was, AKA (y/n), that sounded worrying. 

The kids didn't want to know what those two used to get up to with that thing, how many times they'd nearly been caught by the cops for flinging watermelons where they didn't belong, and how it was only because the Man Cave was a hidden location that they'd managed to wait until the heat died down. It all came to a head when she had to put her foot down after an incident with a smashed window and a furious business owner, so from then on, the trebuchet was tucked away into storage, unused but still ready for another adventure. Yippee.

"No, don't you dare, Ray Manchester! You know how I feel about that damn trebuchet! We're not doing the trebuchet," the woman said firmly, pointing a very stern finger at her lover who didn't seem all that scared, not in the way the kids had previously seen him scared during one of their arguments. 

This was more like a mother admonishing her child into scaring them away from danger, but it was clear that the child was gonna do it anyway, curiosity killed the cat and all that. No, Ray didn't look phased at all and to her frustration, he merely stepped forward, looked deeply into her eyes and when she thought that the soft kiss they shared was his version of an apology, he went and ruined it. And it was such a gentle kiss too, almost perfect had it not been for him pulling away just when she was turning into goo.

"We're doin' the trebuchet...come on, sweet girl...don't look at me like that, sweetheart, " he nodded at Schwoz, making his sweet girl gasp in outrage because he tricked her, the sneaky little—he tricked her! He got her defences down and her argument thrown out by using her need for peppermint-bubblegum against her, which was highly unfair but very effective as it meant that she was dazed just long enough to tell his repairman that they were going storage-diving. Or trash-diving; most of the stuff in storage was absolute garbage.

"What's a trebuchet? Where are they going? Jasper, will you please stop playing with my fake arm?!" So many questions, so little time for poor Henry, whose mood had deflated when this mystery item had been introduced. He'd not done early history in school, otherwise, he might have heard of one, but despite his lack of knowledge, he still got the feeling that whatever a trebby thing was, it wasn't good. This was one of Ray's weird plans that wasn't gonna work, wasn't it?

"We'll handle it. You don't have to worry about anything," Ray tried to soothe his sidekick as he kept (y/n) tied to him with his fingers tight around her hand. He'd need her help to find the trebuchet since she was the one who'd locked it away and so, he was already working on a plan to sway her into doing so, possibly with a bribe, more likely with seduction. He was good at that and he was also good at pissing her off, which was starting to work too, judging by the raised eyebrows and sceptical looks she kept giving him. His plan for her better be good.

"That makes me worry about everything."

"Me too," Charlotte agreed with her friend. She didn't like how cocky her boss was being or how he was dragging (y/n) off for some unknown search and rescue mission or how a trebuchet could be involved. She had a vague idea of what one was since she was a well-read smarty and it gave her the chills. They were big, clunky and not very practical, given how they weren't particularly good when they were first used. What more could Ray want?

"All you gotta do is meet me, (y/n) and Schwoz at school tomorrow morning and we'll trebu-show you a fake accident that's way funnier than Charlotte's," the large man bragged, earning him an eye roll from not just Charlotte, but (y/n) too. Why did she have to be dragged away from her cosy home during the little free time she got? Oh, right, she had to play babysitter to her dumb lover who'd rather prove a point than spend the day watching movies or going shopping with her.

"Oh, yeah, showing up at a kid's school to wreak havoc, just what every normal couple does," she remarked and looked up at her doofus, who for a split second, seemed to be slight sheepish at her observation, almost like the thought of the alternative spending the day at home crossed his mind before the smirk returned. Any time spent with his fiancée was time well spent, so Ray wasn't that bothered, more like planning how tomorrow was gonna unfold.

"All right, whatever. I'm tired, I'm going home."

"Yeah, I'm out like Jasper's belly button."

"Way out," the kids announced, having had enough craziness for one day and by all accounts, they'd be needing their strength for tomorrow so a good night's sleep was in order. They'd leave Ray and Schwoz's to plan for their big plan, hopefully (y/n) wouldn't kill them and by the time that had all been sorted out, they'd thankfully be well clear of whatever the couple was gonna do before finally going to sleep. They wanted to avoid that like the Black Death, so a speedy exit was necessary.

"Henry!" Schwoz suddenly shouted as the kid waited for the elevator. He turned to see the genius looking frantic whilst Ray was oblivious since he was already making a move on (y/n), whispering in her ear and causing her cheeks to heat up. What did Schwoz need that meant he couldn't get out of their love nest? The sooner he left, the better; he still had some innocence left, y'know. 

"Don't let your parents see your cast when you get back home."

"I won't," the boy replied and hit the button with his fake, flailing arm. Did the guy think he was an idiot? His mom would freak if she saw what he'd done to his arm, let alone know what he'd been up to since she and his dad always watched the news.

"Because then, they'll know that you're Kid Danger!"

"Yeah, I realise that." His concern was nice, y'know, it was good that someone cared but it really wasn't necessary. Henry was a smart kid and he knew how to keep the secret from his family. Lord knows he'd had enough practice over the last few years.

"Then, we'd have to wipe their memories again."

"Yeah, I said I realised tha—wait, again?!" Honestly, Henry wanted to get home quick since things were getting too spicy for him in the Man Cave and he was willing to say anything to get Schwoz to shut up, but then, the last detail of his sentence caught his attention. Hang on, did that mean his family had discovered something before? Should he be worried about them? 

"I dunno..." Schwoz's lips were sealed on the promise of Ray beating him up should he squeal any details. What was in the past should stay in the past and that was one story that Henry could never be told, even if it was about his parents, sister and whoever else. So, to take his mind off of it before he was in a sticky situation, Ray stepped in with a little something he'd pulled from a drawer, hoping to make everyone, especially his sweet girl laugh. He loved her laugh.

"Hey, Jasper! Catch!" He yelled to the odd boy and tossed a toilet roll across the room, into the elevator and the boy's hands. What was he—? Oh, god, no more teasing, the poor kid didn't understand the joke until he walked right into it.

"What's this for?"

"In case you pass a playground on your way home," Ray grinned, his banter drawing several chuckles from around the room and to his joy, he felt his darling girl press her face into his pec to save Jasper's blushes. 

She hated laughing at people, even if it was only teasing but it was quite amusing to see Jasper's ears turn pink. She knew it wasn't him but winding him up was so fun and her doofus did it so well, always keeping it light and jovial, never malicious, so despite her frustration, her arms wound their way around his waist and she gazed at him with happiness in her eyes. He was a doofus but he was her doofus.

"I'm not the Playground Pooper!" Jasper shouted in his defence, which didn't help much since agitation is a sign of being guilty, so Ray wasn't convinced, especially when Jasper failed to give the roll back. "But I am keeping this 'cause I think we're out at home!" 

The three were left giggling and joking as the elevator door closed on the couple metres of tissue, which son disappeared when it was pulled upwards. He was never gonna live this down, Ray would never let him go, or he would, but only if something funnier came along. Maybe he'd appeal directly to (y/n) and get her to have a word with him because it was common knowledge that if you wanted to talk with the boss, you went to her - the true heart of the Man Cave.

~The next day, Swellview High School~

Things were buzzing in the corridors of Swellview High as kids rushed to get to classes they were late for or to their group of friends to swap the latest gossip. Of course, there were the usual topics; who was dating who, which teacher was on the verge of being sacked, had Captain Man really been caught making out with Miss Danger in an alley behind the Nacho Ball on Fifth Street, some were more exaggerated than others but the thing on everyone's lips was obvious, more popular than anything else. Kid Danger.

No one knew when the mystery boy was going to turn up, so everyone was on the lookout for a kid who fit the bill, which wasn't too hard. Some had even placed bets on who they thought it could be, some pretended that they didn't even care when they were more desperate than anyone else and others were just hoping to get lucky. Every girl wanted to date Kid Danger, so they all thought they'd know him when they saw him, not discounting Piper Hart. 

She didn't even go to that school, being too young, and yet there she was, bright and early, skiving from her real lessons for a glimpse at the sidekick and his telltale broken arm. Piper had a system; vet every boy who came in, check for any suspicious injuries and ask him to be her boyfriend until the end of time. Because that wouldn't be creepy at all.

"We are so getting put on some kind of list. Y'know, the kind for weirdos who sneak into schools." 

Not as creepy as what was being set up in the hall, though. It was another topic of conversation amongst the students; what the hell was that monstrosity in front of the doors and why were three freaks messing with it? No guesses for who the three freaks were. 

Ray and Schwoz were perfectly calm as they adjusted the twine on the trebuchet, making sure everything was gonna be ready for their big performance. It had taken some sneakiness to get it into the school and no short amount of lying for any suspicious teachers who wanted to know why two medieval squires and one noble lady were shoving bits of old wood and ropes into their school. 

(y/n) felt uneasy, like her tummy was telling her something again, but no matter how much she scolded her doofus about his dumbness or reasoned that it wasn't on late to go home yet, he patted her on the head and spoke to her in a stupidly formal accent.

"Worry not, fair maiden. Watcheth thy lover as his trebuchet makes the melon-eth fly through the air...eth," Ray replied, giving her a gentle side smile as he placed a heavy yet small melon onto a wooden panel, ready to be flung. He was trying his best to fit the part, ensuring that his voice matched his ridiculous dress-up of baggy blue breeches, tunic embroidered with silver studs, knee-high brown leather boots and soufflé-like hat, complete with a yellow feather. 

Schwoz didn't look much better; his outfit looked like some cavalier reject, straight from the English Civil War what with his natty wig and red velvet ensemble, and now that she thought about it, (y/n) didn't fancy her outfit much either. 

She kept tripping up on her skirts, had spent way too long on her hair, and was almost certain that she'd done up the corset wrong since Ray had been trying to trail kisses down her neck when he came up from behind after seeing her struggle for so long. It was a wonder she'd even managed to get dressed after finding him still insatiable that morning but after beating him off with a metaphorical stick, she'd pulled on her gloves, fallen over her own feet a million times and found herself in Henry's school, smiling at the children like a regal queen. If only. 

They all looked odd and the woman hadn't felt this vulnerable to school bullies since she'd had her braces put on in middle school but for now, they were staying away, possibly because of the hulking giant of a man who kept pecking her cheek. The same giant who failed to realise that speaking like a twelfth-century noble did not mean adding fancy inflexions after every word or using archaic words. 

Any minute now, someone would recognise them as the wacko couple who ran that junk store down the road or even worse, Piper would pay attention and realise that her friend was a weirdo getting married to another weirdo.

"I'll make you fly through the air, Ray. I'll kick your butt!" She snapped, prodding him in the pec as Henry and Charlotte approached with disgusted looks on their faces. It was impossible to miss the trebuchet and the not-so-subtle flirting, particularly when Ray looked up from his mischief to stop her worrying little head yet again. This was a school, he had to keep his hands to himself, but that didn't mean he couldn't fawn over her.

"Babe, this plan is perfect...and funny! Stop worrying about it and just stand there looking all pretty. Like you usually do," the hero smirked, squishing her flaming cheeks as she tried to be stern only for him to flirt his way past her defences. She was trying to be mad at him and failing miserably because whilst the dress wasn't her style, he loved her in it—well, he loved her in anything.

"Flattery will get you nowhere!"

"It got me somewhere last night. Remember?" Ray was lightning fast with his remark, watching as her jaw hit the ground because he was exactly right, not that she wanted to show him that. 

It was obvious, however, and the man saw straight through the way she tried to stop her eyes from widening and her lip from quivering, only to fail miserably. He made an excellent point; not ten hours earlier, he broke past her grumpy façade when they were digging through old weapons and gadgets and used his charm to leave Schwoz to find the trebuchet and drag her to a more private setting. 

"You—you—that's the last time we...y'know! I swear! No more for you! Ever!" The woman spluttered waggling her finger under his nose as she flustered from his observation. It was an empty threat, a lose-lose situation that neither of them ever wanted, so the hero didn't falter, rather, his smirk deepened.

"Sure it is, sweet girl. Just wait until tonight when you're begging me—"

"Oh my god, what are they talking about?"

"And what are they doing?" The banter was interrupted by the familiar voices of two disgruntled teens as they approached the medieval display and instantly, the couple clammed up on discussing their nightly activities. This was a school, after all, and those were their wards. They sounded confused and disgusted, which caused (y/n) to yet again squirm in embarrassment since she had no idea how close they were, but in all seriousness, she had to agree that the costumes and act were nothing short of humiliating.

"Tis ready!"

"Forsooth!"

"Fire thy trebuchet, dearheart, and Godspeed!—or something to that effect..." the "actors" proclaimed for all to hear and as Ray took up his fair lady's hand and planted a respectful kiss on her knuckles, the trebuchet fired the watermelon, flinging it across the hall until it splattered against a poster a few metres away. It was quite impressive, judging by the awed reactions of the round of applause from the teenage crowd, who now knew what a trebuchet was. A catapult thing, not what you'd normally expect a thirty-seven-year-old man to keep in his home but whatever.

"Oh, good morrow, fair youth!" Ray exclaimed as he noticed Henry standing near his brilliant device and without breaking his persona, approached him in a bouncy if ridiculous manner that probably would've ended up in him losing his head had he done it in a real ancient court. 

He needed to see his reaction because his plan was amazing and there was no doubt that the kid was speechless from his performance. Of course, he didn't want to make it known that he was Henry's boss, that dude from Junk-N-Stuff, but still, he couldn't help but wrap an arm around his shoulders and pull him to the side as (y/n) and Schwoz soaked up the praise.

"Good morrow to yo—I can't do this, dude. What's going on?" Henry asked in exasperation, not even bothering to copy his boss's fancy words because he wasn't some dick from the Middle Ages, he was a kid from the modern era. All he wanted to know was why he was on the verge of being heavily embarrassed.

"Okay, here's the plan," the man hissed, drawing a few glances from (y/n) and Charlotte as the girl teased her friend over her beautiful yet impractical getup. 

"You go stand by the stairs. We fling a basketball at you. It hits you in your fake arm and you pretend like it's broken! It'll be a lot funnier than Charlotte's idea!"

"Okay, but what if the basketball doesn't hit me—"

"And break!" Henry didn't have time to share any concerns or bring up any issues that might have been tied to the plan because Ray didn't want to hear it, so he pushed the kid back into the crowd. He couldn't complain in front of his peers, he couldn't even acknowledge that he knew these weirdos, so he walked over to his spot and prepared himself for the basketball. 

"We are members of the Swellview Flinging Society!"

"Forsooth!" Ray introduced himself and his band of merry men—woman—weirdo and woman—whatever. They even did a strange dance pose, arms curled in the air as their toes pointed and (y/n) could already hear sniggers of "losers" coming from the crowd. She'd left school a long time ago, being back and bullied in her thirties wasn't how she'd pictured her life going.

"We doth fling many things with our trebuchet!"

"Tis the truth, my young friends. Now, behold with thine eyes that hath seen fewer winters than mine and see for yourself, the art of an age gone by!" But, she humoured her doofus nonetheless and played into her part, flourishing and smiling at the crowd as if she was some queen from a long forgotten time, using words she'd only ever read in Shakespeare, in an outfit that should've been in a museum. 

Ray and Schwoz moved to set up the trebuchet, cranking back the arm into flinging position, which left hosting duties to her, and as they did, Jasper barrelled past them, heading for Henry and Charlotte. What was he in a hurry for?

"Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey! You guys, check it out!"

"Hey, Pooper."

"What's poopening?" His friends greeted him, causing his mouth to set into a straight, firm line. That joke wasn't funny yesterday and nothing had changed overnight, except that he now had material to back himself up against these heinous lies. The only way he could get everyone to see that he didn't use playgrounds as toilets was if he proved that he couldn't have done the deed or have even been there. Proof was irrefutable.

"I know who the Playground Pooper is."

"So do we."

"Yeah, it's you," Charlotte and Henry couldn't help but mock him a little, ensuring that their faces showed no hint of humour or that they were joking. He was used to it and at the end of the day, the teasing was harmless and all in good fun.

"No, it's not! I go in toilets, I've been potty trained for four years!" Jasper told them sternly, trying to stress that he was a big boy, a seventeen-year-old very capable of going in appropriate places. But then, when Charlotte thought about his words, something didn't add up. Seventeen minus four...oh, god.

"Wait..." It didn't bear thinking about for Charlotte. She'd known Jasper since...forever, did that mean he'd...when she was with him? 

"Just look at this..." the boy didn't dwell on that disturbing fact for long and instead, directed his friends' attention to the PearPad he took from his backpack, on which he'd pulled up a video that had been uploaded to SplashFace. Something about someone being spotted somewhere in Swellview Park. What significance did that have? 

"This is the Playground Pooper walking through some carnations and I'm allergic to carnations, so it can't be me!"

"Those look like roses."

"What?!" Charlotte shot down his hopes in one fell swoop. She was no flower expert but she knew what a carnation was and even though the video quality wasn't good, she could see that the petals weren't crinkled in the right way. And Jasper couldn't believe it, he could swear that those buds were the ones that brought him out in sneezes and a rash, but according to Henry, those were something different entirely.

"Yeah, those are North American Sugar roses, bro. I know my flowers," Henry told him, divulging a surprising fact about himself since, in most teenage boy circles, flowers weren't the "in thing". Who wants to spend a few weeks looking at different blooms surrounded by pretty, soft girls? Oh, right, that's why he went.

"He does, he went to flower camp."

"Yeah, dude, it was sick."

"No!" Jasper stormed off in a mood, having had enough of talk about flowers, namely because he'd been disproven. That had been his big plan, that the plants would provide him with an alibi but he hadn't counted on Henry being such an expert. Now he had to come up with something else, but he was flat out of ideas and back to square one. His friends were so nice.

"Hear ye, hear ye! The flinging is about to commenceth!" Ray suddenly announced, drawing everyone's focus back to the trebuchet now that it had been reset into its original position. Show time; his big plan was ready if only those involved could assume their given positions.

"Everyone should stand where they're supposed to stand..."

"Gotta go..." Henry took that as his unsubtle hint to go and stand where the melon had splattered across the floor and wall. Charlotte had a bad feeling about this and if she had one, then (y/n) had one, but all they could do was shared a worried shrug since there was no stopping this farce now.

"My dear younglings, be-ith most careful, for when yon basketball be shot, it traveleth so fast, that it mayeth break someone's arm. I would hate to see such sorrow before the midday sun," (y/n) added, wanting to make sure that no one but Henry stood near the trebuchet because that would mean an instant phone call to the police, them having to explain themselves to an officer and their problem still very much prominent. 

And it was about to get even bigger because as the children broke out into applause again, a wandering green booger walked her way into the corridor, eyeing the performers with suspicion written on her face.

"Hold it right there, fancy pants!" Sharona Shapen snapped above the noise and the room fell into a silence, including one kid with some particularly snazzy trousers on. Poor guy, he was just trying to get to class in his best outfit, it was only a coincidence that other people had come into the building rivalling his fabulousness. He needed to be sent on his way.

"Not you, L'Orange! What the heck is going on here?" The teacher demanded to know and even if she was weird and even if her dress sense was hideous and even if she'd been known to love on Captain Man, she had a right to ask that. They'd turned up to the school with no warning or permission, which was concerning now that they thought about it and (y/n) just prayed that she didn't see through their disguises.

"We be the Swellview Flinging Society!"

"We are flingers!"

"We fling, patron of the arts!" The three lied, doing their little fancy greeting before (y/n) slipped her hand into Ray's. It might have ruined the image a bit but she needed something to ground her right now, otherwise, she was in danger of fainting from the stress. Sharona was looking at them with an evil stare and she did not look happy. Maybe she and Ray could swap love letters when they were each carted off to separate prisons.

"Well, go do your flinging somewhere else! These kids should be in classrooms pretending to listen to their teachers!" She hissed, making an excellent point to the startled trio, who was shuffling on their feet to think of a way to buy her silence. 

Once upon a time, a year or two ago, Ray had kissed her as a distraction, but that was out of the question now. One kiss had nearly killed him since he'd swore to never kiss any lips other than those that tasted like honey and (y/n) had only agreed because that had been an emergency. No, that wasn't gonna work on Sharona this time, so Ray offered the one thing he could.

"Look, you wanna fling a basketball at a wall?" It was carnal, brutish, and entirely uncivilised but that was the weird teacher all over and part of the fun. It was the best offer she'd had in months, especially from someone so handsome.

"'Course I do, get outta my way," she quickly agreed, the temptation too much regardless of her earlier concerns about safety and the students' education. When it came down to it, Miss Shapen was entirely selfish and eager to see the trebuchet in action, although first, Schwoz needed to show her what to do so she hit Henry as per the plan.

"Allow me to explaineth—"

"Relax, Leonardo. I've used a trebuchet in a school before," she spoke over him, however, meaning Schwoz wasn't able to get in there and aim the catapult in the direction they need it to be. Glossing over the oddness of her being so reckless in another situation, (y/n) looked at her lover with wide eyes and realised that things were about to go wrong and all because one woman couldn't listen.

"Favoured artisan, bearer of knowledge, orchestrator of tomorrow's wisdom...put the forsaken trebuchet down and leteth my companions aim—"

"Fire in the hall!" Any of the heroine's pleas were useless; Sharona released the catch before anyone could turn the arm, so the basketball was fired at maximum power and in completely the wrong direction. Straight into Charlotte's head. Ouch. 

The poor girl squealed and fell to the floor, not gravely injured, thank God, but she still had the mother of all heads and undoubtedly, she'd wake up with a lump tomorrow. The crowd gasped at the horrific collision and no one was more horrified than her nearest and dearest, who looked at the teacher with wide eyes for what she had done.

"I was never here!" Miss Shapen shouted to her students, even though it was pretty useless since she stuck out like a green thumb and every one of them would be happy to rat her out if it meant less homework. And, as much as they wanted to strangle her for what she'd done without letting them help first, Ray, Schwoz and (y/n) had to let the teacher scurry off as Henry helped Charlotte up because it wasn't their place as visiting actors to scold a teacher for the injury caused to a girl they weren't supposed to know.

"Are you okay?" Henry asked breathlessly as he leaned over Charlotte, hoping that she didn't have a concussion, but clearly, things were so hot for Charlotte, who couldn't see for the flashing lights in her eyes and the spinning room. She could see five Henrys in her head and because of her confusion, she didn't register the mistake she made in grabbing his fake arm, believing that it was real and stretched out to help her up. 

"No, no, no, no!" Too late. Henry couldn't do anything as his friend tumbled back to the ground, his false arm in her hand as Charlotte pulled it from his sleeve, much to the shock of his friends and fellow students. If that didn't look suspicious, then nothing did because, now, there was a kid in the hall who'd either just suffered and gruesome yet impossible injury or he had something to hide.

"Oh, shit..." (y/n) breathed out as Henry's world came crashing down and now, she needed Ray's entire arm to ground herself as they watched helplessly with stony faces. The hero's heart was in his mouth as he watched his youngest sidekick flounder, knowing that the worst scenario possible was now happening and he was helpless to intervene as the kid did the only thing he could think of.

"Ahhhh! Charlotte just pulled off my real arm! Next time you see me, I'll probably have a cast," he attempted to make the best of the situation, throwing in some lame excuse that his arm had magically dropped off with no blood spillages and that he'd be okay. Yeah, there was nothing weird at all about just sticking a cast on an amputated arm, that was how science worked. However, when one kid, known for being highly snotty and annoying, picked up his rubber limb from the floor, it was all over, no more playing around.

"This arm is fake! This is a fake arm!" He told the crowd, who immediately began whispering and chuntering amongst themselves about what that could mean for the boy who was nice to all, fairly popular, rather good-looking but sometimes mysteriously absent from his classes. Piper, who'd seen everything from her place scanning boys at the door, walked over to her brother, intent on finding the truth, even if he looked terrified at that moment.

"Why were you wearing a fake arm?" She demanded to know but when Henry tried to string together an excuse, she didn't let him finish. It was too late for excuses, Henry was way out of his depth. "What are you hiding?"

"Piper, I'm not doing anyth—"

"Take this off! What is wrong with you?!—" his sister exclaimed, not knowing that the big deal was about the ugly sweater that her brother had refused to take off since last night. Fighting his squirming body, she grasped the hood and tugged it over his head and Henry was powerless to stop her with merely one hand and so, the horse-themed garment was removed, revealing his blue cast underneath. And how telling it was to the boys and girls watching.

"You've got a broken arm!" Piper exclaimed with horror and shock written all over her face as she took in the sight in front of her.

There stood a boy about Kid Danger's height, about Kid Danger's age with a broken arm and before her eyes, everything fell into place, not that she could make sense of anything. There was only one explanation and Henry didn't know what to do. He couldn't look at Ray or (y/n), he didn't want to see their angry or disappointed faces, he couldn't look at Schwoz, Jasper or Charlotte either since he didn't want to implicate them. This was officially a disaster. So much for Ray's big plan.

"Oh my god, Henry Hart is Kid Danger!" The annoying kid realised, sending everyone into a shocked, noisy kerfuffle as everyone turned to their friends to gossip. 

Ray and (y/n) could try to discourage as much as they wanted, telling the kids that they knew very little about being superheroes but that didn't sound very likely, yet nothing could convince them otherwise. 

Girls were already planning their dates, boys were already planning to be his best friend and others were in awe of the scrawny, average kid who'd never been particularly good at anything, just another face around school. Who'd have thought that he was a superhero's sidekick? Not Piper, that's for sure.

"So much better than my plan," Charlotte said to Ray with a glare that could kill as she nursed her sore head and on a rare occasion in his life, Ray looked remorseful, guilty even. He had to admit that something else may have been easier and that perhaps in this situation, getting the issue over and done with would've been easier, nothing funny about it. 

"We need a way to fix this, now. You know what kids are like! One text or TwitFlash update and we are finished, Ray. No more Captain Man, no more Miss Danger, no more anything!" (y/n) stressed to her fiancé, who didn't need telling to know that they had to do something and fast. 

"Calm down, sweet girl. We'll think of something, I promise. Nothing's—gonna—happen," he reassured her, pressing firm kisses to her forehead with each word to try and make her feel better but as her fingers curled against his chest, she could feel his heartbeat jumping through the velvet blue. 

Maybe he was trying to convince himself as well as her that everything would be okay, but it wasn't helping given the fact that they could hear Piper stressing behind them. She sounded distraught at the deceit and that just made her want to cry into his shoulder even more, more so when the annoying kid started poking the bear again.

"Why were hiding your broken arm? We have a right to know!" He stated, prodding Henry with the squashy fingers of the rubber arm, tapping the cast in a way that made the blond-haired boy want to claw his eyes out, though he settled for just slapping the thing away. Getting irate wouldn't help anything, rather, it was a sign of a guilty conscience.

"Listen, everybody, listen! Stop poking me! I'm not—I'm not Kid Danger, okay? Okay, stop poking me! Stop poking me, Melvin!" He shouted above the noise, attempting to control the crowd and stop their whispering and gossiping, but the stress, the worry and the annoyance of constantly being prodded soon became too much for him. 

As his last nerve broke, Henry grabbed the fake arm and harshly used it to slap the annoying kid, also known as Melvin, across the face, feeling satisfied as the rubber belted his skin and left it red. It was a bit cruel but he deserved it, even if the crowd did gasp in surprise. He was so irritating, there was no surprise that he broke the kid's patience.

"Okay, I have the arm! I get to speak now!" Henry declared as he held the arm in his free hand, which was a gauntlet for who was allowed to talk and one kid took it quite seriously. "Thank you. Now, as I was saying, I'm not Kid Danger—"

"Prove it!" Melvin yelled, having gotten over his assault to be as annoying as ever. It was reasonable though, if Henry wanted to save his skin, then he was gonna have to give them a damn good excuse, no matter what it cost him.

"I will prove it, Melvin! As soon as I...think of something," he argued, trying to seem cool and composed when he had no idea what they were gonna do or how they were gonna get out of this one. 

He looked at Ray and (y/n) since they were the adults in this situation, they were meant to be in control and responsible, not to mention that the latter was smart. However, they looked just as clueless as he did, pale and nervous too, so it took someone unforeseeable to swoop in and save his bacon, someone who never normally saved the day.

"Come with me to the janitor's closet!" Jasper murmured in his ear as he snuck past, which didn't sound perturbing at all for Henry, who didn't fancy a secret rendezvous with his best friend in the dark but he was already gone and pushing through the line of people who were staring at the two. It didn't look like he had much choice.

"I will be back with answers...until then...Melvin has the arm," he announced and tossed the limb at the boy, who could now run his mouth off to his heart's content since he wouldn't be around to get annoyed. He seemed quite content to be in charge, but the sight of Henry scuttling off into the closet was rather peculiar for Charlotte, (y/n), Ray and Schwoz.

"What do you think they're up to?" The woman whispered to her doofus as they observed Charlotte scrambling after those idiots just as quickly as they had. Ray peered around the corner with squinted eyes, looking through the chattering students to see where they went and he decided that whatever was going down, they were gonna be a part of it.

"I don't know, darlin', but we're gonna find out," he replied, squeezing her hand once before pulling her across the hall, assuming that Schwoz was following behind them. He was Captain Man, this was his life, his work, his legacy and he wasn't going to watch it go down in flames; he wanted to know what they were planning, mainly because this was his fault, not that he'd ever admit that.

Storming across the room, Ray dodged the many children in his way and ignored the strange looks they got as they headed for the janitor's closet. No one questioned why the performers were wanting to speak with the newly discovered Kid Danger, so they were free to rip open the door, tumble in as a whirlwind of sparkly, studded velvet and wine red skirts, and see the three of them stood there. 

Henry and Charlotte had crowded around Jasper's PearPad again, watching some video on some website that (y/n) remembered from her youth. What party had they just crashed?

"You got a big problem on your hands," was the first thing Ray said as he pulled his lover in front of him so she was in on the conversation and then shut the door behind him for a little privacy. 

That statement earned him a few glares because whilst it was technically true, Henry did have a big problem, it was more accurate that they all had a big problem. After all, it affected every one of them, did he not realise that he could be found out too if someone connected the dots? Henry Hart's boss from Junk-N-Stuff was Captain Man? The similarities were obvious when you thought about them.

"No, Raymond, we have a big problem. We."

"I know that, thank you," Henry, although thankful for her correction, stated dryly after (y/n). He didn't mean to sound rude but he was under enough pressure as it was, an argument wasn't needed, just a solution.

"Guys, listen!" Jasper suddenly snapped, having been trying for the past couple of minutes to get his friends to listen to his idea but no one was taking him seriously. This was a real, decent plan that wasn't short of delicious humiliation but would be highly effective if only he could say it without any more interruptions.

"What if Henry was the Playground Pooper?" Oh, yeah, he was going there.

"That's impossible. It's you," Ray countered, not letting his joke/belief that his weirdest employee was behind the dumpings. He sounded genuinely conflicted, much to Jasper's annoyance because he was trying to do something here and all he was getting was a finger pointed at him as the culprit.

"No, it's not!" He yelped, raising his volume in an attempt to get through to them, which predictably didn't work. But, they never got the chance to break out into a full debate because incredibly, miraculously, impossibly, Schwoz suddenly jumped out from the blue trash can stored in the closet, which was an unfeasible action because there was no way he could've climbed in without them seeing, so his appearance gave them all quite a scare.

"Schwoz Schwartz, you maniac! How did you get in there?!" (y/n) asked indignantly as she clutched her chest like the teens and felt Ray go loose again after he tensed up at possible danger. His arms had circled her from a protective instinct and she'd leaned back after the fright, meaning they were closely snuggled more than they had already been, thanks to Schwoz, not that they'd ever credit for giving them a reason to be pressed against each other.

"Wasn't easy," the genius bragged, looking smug at how he'd managed to spook them all, although he did fear the way Ray was glaring at him, probably because he made his fiancée with a nervous disposition jump. And yet he had a good reason for doing so. 

"I have an idea that will solve all of Henry's problems." Well, that sounded ideal.

"So do I!" 

"Clog it, Pooper! What you got, Schwoz?" And no matter how much he argued, Ray would take one of Schwoz's crazy yet awesome plans any day over Jasper's pathetic nonsense, so he had to button his lip, despite his need to share his thoughts becoming almost unbearable. Couldn't they listen to him just once? His plan was great...

"We set off a memory wave and everyone with a three-block radius has no memory of any of it...or anything else in their lives!" He suggested, describing a plan that was insane and cruel but when they thought about it, Henry and Charlotte could see the advantages. There would be a lot of eyebrows raised from how a school of trained teachers and bright students went from functioning normally to being full of brain-dead zombies. But at the end of the day, it would solve the problem, even if it wasn't very ethical.

"I mean...maybe."

"It is simple."

"Guys!"

"Yeah, but what's funny about it? Like when am I going haha?" (y/n) was understandably upset with the suggestion, being of an affectionate nature, but Ray saw something else. Despite everything, he was still trying to find the funny side of everything, looking for humour in the plan when all it needed was to be effective. That earned him a glare from his sweet girl and yet Jasper saw an opportunity because whilst his wasn't as tech-heavy as that, it would draw a few laughs.

"Ray, I love you with everything I have but do shut up!"

"Guys! I have a solution and it's really funny!" The boy exclaimed over the debate and for once, his friends fell silent and listened. He said it was funny, so Ray would be satisfied. He said it was a solution, so Henry's problems would be solved. Interesting. If it was so great, he'd just have to prove it. Time for Jasper to put his money where his mouth was.

~

Jasper's plan was in motion. As promised, and with a little encouragement from his fiancée, Ray had worked with Schwoz to move the trebuchet out of the school to give the crowd enough space to gather (because no one cared about any actual learning) and they were patiently waiting against the wall. 

They had an observatory role with Charlotte, where they got to sit back, relax and laugh at what was about to unfold and whilst the hero was a little salty considering that he didn't have a starring role, the promise of kissing and flirting with his sweet girl in the mean time sealed the deal. 

Now, Jasper was taking centre stage with his best mate, Henry, both of them standing before the audience of their fellow students and Piper, all of whom were waiting with bated breath and crossed arms to hear their great explanation. It would take some doing; convincing them otherwise and getting them to back off from Henry's private life but Jasper would do it, by god he would do it because he was buzzing about what his friend was about to confess to.

"Okay! There's been a lot of speculation today that Henry is Kid Danger!" He shouted, addressing the crowd, who didn't agree with mere "speculation". Screw speculation, they had proof that he was genuinely the sidekick, an opinion they weren't quiet about.

"He is!"

"He's not! But he does have something he wants to announce," the boy swiftly shot down any objections, affirming that Henry was not who he was because if he kept saying it, they'd start to believe it, especially when the deliciously humiliating excuse was added.

"I don't know if I can—"

"Henry Hart, everyone!" There was no time for Henry to back out now, no matter how fast his heart was beating at the thought of the social suicide he was about to commit as a few awkward claps sounded. This would ruin him, everyone would laugh behind his back, his sister would never acknowledge him again, hell, his parents might even disown him because this was gonna bring nothing but shame, shame, shame. 

However, for the sake of his job, the safety of his friends, his boss, the woman who was like a sister to him, and the safety of the entire city, he was gonna do it. He was going to swallow every shred of his pride and confess a lie to save everything.

"Thank you!" Henry smiled politely at those who bothered to clap for him, only to be taken by surprise when some kid dragged over Piper's podium from when she was checking boys for broken arms, and it could only get worse from there. 

"Oh, right, my sister's podium, glad that's here. And a microphone! Thank you, L'Orange! And a sign language interpreter, great."

"Okay, uh, I know there's a lot of speculation that due to my broken arm, I am Kid Danger," Henry started, settling into his speaking role and forcing his voice to remain as steady as possible, despite how nervous he was feeling. And for some, even the mention of that fact, the mere possibility that he could be a superhero's sidekick, beloved by all teen girls in the city looking for love, was just too unsettling. Piper. Piper was unsettled, judging by the long, loud, involuntary scream she let out before shutting her mouth again.

"But the fact of the matter is I'm not Kid Danger because..." Henry, with the sign language boy behind him following his every word, struggled to say the lie. He couldn't do it, could he? This was the most humiliating thing he'd ever done and even when Jasper put a comforting hand on his shoulder, he couldn't help but start to stutter.

"I am...well...I am the Playground Pooper."

There. He said it. It was out there and resulting in shocked gasps and tittering giggles across the hall, most of them coming from behind him where Ray and Schwoz's shoulders were shaking with (y/n) and Charlotte also biting back smiles. 

To be fair, it was a horrible thing to confess to in front of all of his schoolmates and at such a young age, the kind of incident that only happened in a nightmare but it was also the kind of thing that could be funny if it wasn't happening to you. His friends weren't affected, so they didn't feel the stigma or have flaming cheeks as he did, just the humour of the situation as people realised the implications of such a confession.

"So, you're Kid Danger and the Playground Pooper?" Melvin asked, not understanding what Henry was saying since technically, he hadn't proven that being a pooper in playgrounds meant he couldn't be a sidekick; he'd just said something highly embarrassing.

"What? No, no, no, no, no, no, no....no. I'm just...the Playground Pooper." Kill him, unalive him now, and end his misery because explaining himself was torture. 

"Okay, this is funny," Ray whispered in his sweet girl's ear, loud enough for Jasper and Charlotte to hear too and agree, but quiet enough to not raise suspicion. And despite her morals and kindness, (y/n) was inclined to agree with him because whilst she wasn't one for bullying, this was hilarious, seeing how Henry admitted to something so gross. 

It wasn't like it would scar him, he wasn't the Playground Pooper, so there were no worries, which meant she could lean back into her doofus and let his chin rest on her shoulder—perhaps allow him a few neck kisses, even if he had been an idiot with the trebuchet.

"Prove it! Prove it! Prove it! Prove it! Prove it!" The students (and Ray and Schwoz) chanted, pressuring Henry to show some substantial evidence that would back up his claims because they weren't gonna laugh until they knew it was true. Right now, he was still Kid Danger, so Henry had no choice but to turn to Jasper for the final excruciating stab to his reputation.

"As you can see," Henry started, gesturing to the PearPad being held high by Jasper that showed the SplashFace video of the latest poop attack," in this security camera footage of me...doin' what I love... It's time-stamped, which proves that the exact same time that Kid Danger—whoever he is—was getting his arm broken by Doctor Karaté...I was on the playground."

"Poopin'?" Melvin guessed because he couldn't believe this tall tale. He'd always seen Henry Hart as a sound guy, a little absent from classes, a little more popular with the ladies than he was but still kinda awkward, but not the sort who went around crapping like a cat. It didn't seem right but then again, it took some balls to confess to something like this and he'd only do that if he wasn't Kid Danger, so...

"Yes, Melvin. Thank you. I was poopin'," Henry clarified and it was enough for everyone to break out into grossed-out chuckles, murmuring about how irresponsible, disgusting, inconsiderate and weird he was for getting his kicks out of leaving little presents wherever he went. 

And whilst Henry could feel his school life nosediving, Ray and Schwoz were having the time of their lives, mocking the kid by laughing and doing the sign language for pooping, the works, much to (y/n)'s failed attempts to control them. She was laughing too much to be taken seriously, so her fists beating against her lover's chest were actually very gentle and in the end, she just gave up.

"So, obviously, I, uh, I'm not Kid Danger, okay? Please respect my privacy as I seek help during this difficult time. Thank you," and like a true professional, Henry signed off his little announcement quickly, hoping that he could crawl away to die in some dark hole where nobody could find him, but then, a call came from the student body. And it could only be one person.

"Wait! How did you break your arm then?" Melvin, of course, had to ask and suddenly, Henry had to think on the spot. He hadn't planned an answer for that, he'd just assumed that people would be too busy laughing their asses off to question him anymore, so now he was fighting to stay calm again. Something believable, something realistic, something to get them to back off.

"Yes. How did I break my arm?" Think, Hart, think! Oh, god, bad idea incoming, but it would have to do. "After I...did my thang...I slipped."

"On poop?"

"Yes, Melvin. On poop." Someone kill this kid. Someone unalive him before Henry did because he was just so damn annoying and that wasn't just Henry the entire school thought that. But, as embarrassing as that was to admit as well, the kids took it and started cringing again, but this time, there was mocking as well. It had to happen at some point, but that didn't dull the humiliation anymore, Henry was still dying on the inside.

"Henry's the Playground Pooper and he slipped on his own poop and broke his arm!" Melvin laughed as he pointed at the blond boy, who felt his annoyance spike again because even though he expected to be ridiculed, he wasn't gonna take it from that guy. Yeah, he was now the school weirdo, but he was gonna keep Melvin down at the bottom with him, no matter what. Weirdos together, right?

"No one likes you, Melvin! No one likes you!"

"No further questions," Jasper yanked him away and left the crowd to their amused chattering before Henry damaged his reputation anymore. he turned to face his friends where Ray and Schwoz were still finding the situation hilarious, although Charlotte and (y/n) were behaving much better. Sort of.

"Well, that was humiliating."

"Eh, people will have forgotten about it in a week. Whenever the next kid trips in the canteen with their lunch or when a jock hoists a nerd onto the basketball hoop by their underwear. People will forget, Hen," (y/n) comforted him, although right now, it didn't sink in much. Henry looked over his shoulder to see what felt like hundreds of pairs of eyes on him, boys sniggering, the girls he fancied whispering about him and not in a good way. This was it. His life was officially over but Captain Man and his job were safe. He just wished he could feel a bit better about that.

"I know, I know. High school doesn't last forever, right?" He offered the old saying; he'd survive this because every kid leaves school and with that, they leave their problems behind too.

"Of course. High school doesn't mean shit. When you're out in the real world, no one will care about anything that is said or done within these walls, not even if you were the prettiest cheerleader or the best guy on the football field. Popularity is a myth, don't obsess over it," she told him, knowing that he wouldn't know what she meant until his teen-hood was long behind him and having the clown behind her wasn't helping. 

They were still making fun, laughing about doodies and logs because both of them were five-year-olds and incapable of seeing how it was getting Henry down. Sure, kids would remember this and possibly tell it to their kids to make them laugh, but his life wasn't ruined, far from it.

"Yeah, but... In the Man Cave..."

"What about the Man Cave?" She didn't know how that was relevant because it was safe, right? They'd done what it had taken to keep it safe so she could work out why he was stressing about it. They worked and lived in a happy environment with nothing to worry about, so what had him looking so gaunt and pale as if he'd seen a ghost? What was making those eyes all puppy-dog? What had Henry Hart so concerned about?

"I'm never gonna live this down, am I?" He asked and for that, she had no advice. Knowing her soon-to-be husband and favourite handyman, it would definitely take a while for this joke to dissipate, unless Jasper did something cosmically hilarious in the next five seconds. 

She looked at him with sympathy because she knew it, he knew it. The boys, the girls, everyone wasn't going to let this one go for a while and Henry would just have to tolerate it, another thing to add to the pile of things he tolerated; excessive kissing, wandering hands, endless flirting, mutant experiments in the fridge, never-ending danger and a marriage that kept being talked about even though nothing seemed to be happening. 

"No. No, you're not. In fact, it will probably be still fresh and just as funny at the wedding. Hey, you could put it in your best man's speech!"

"I could put it in my what?!"

[transfagholmes]

[ID: a tweet by edward after-hours @lyingaybastard, "put them in a room together and see what happens". Attached are pictures of Lestat from the Interview with the Vampire TV series, Benoit Blanc from Glass Onion, Hannibal from NBC's Hannibal and Stede Bonnet from Our Falg Means Death.

In the reblog are tags from this post.

#what happens is the most absurdly polite brunch you've ever witnessed

#hannibal and benoit bond over love of ipads

#stede explains his fuckery. blanc replies Why that is a masterful scheme you pulled there mr bonnet. and yo ehat you called it? a fuckery?

#i love how their common denominator is a long suffering dark haired husband

#stedes superpower is vaporizing french people

#oh please Lestat and Hannibal would be so busy fucking and eating eachother they wouldn't know what the other two are doing

#hannibal and lestat would be two cats sniffing each other out

#also the accents going on in this room alone would make conversation almost impossible lmao

#I'll say this again #stede is geting eaten for dinner #they're making stedefado

#completely new try guys

#through a series of comedic mishaps they all end up dead except for stede

#god they would all be talking constantly and saying absolutely fucking nothing

#this is like the absurd way of speaking white gay avengers

#blunt rotation

#louis. mon cher. have you seen? this.... application my brunch companion has installed upon my ipad. #among us -- they call it. louis. but it begs the question do you not think? #which of the two of us is the true imposter?

#white on white crime

#benoit: new orleans? well i'll be. when ah was a much younga man ah spent a considerable amount a time there imbibin' and revelin' #but ah doubt ah could evah be as well acquainted with the night life as a vampiah such as yourself #say... you do have a familiah look about you. did you evah frequent any discos in the latter half of the nineteen seventies?

#brunch-to-orgy speedrun

#the cunt present in that room. the passive aggression. the active aggression. the secret third aggression.

#this is the avenger endgame for the sad tumblr girlies

End ID]

Via twitter

[fortressofserenity]

Christmas At Ground Zero

Somebody going by the name of 'Handmaid Of The Most High' said that America will undergo so many mishaps that it's really going to officially fall from grace, an earthquake will divide the contiguous US landmass in half starting with the Mississippi River. The the US economy deteriorates real badly, where people are as powerless as they're hungry. So hungry that they eat their pets, then they start eating fellow humans.

So much for calling the Chinese nasty dog eaters that it's going to be the Americans' turn to eat dogs this time, yes the most popular pet in America will become a food source for starving Americans across the country. Russia might launch nuclear attacks on America, but with the aim of conquering this country and also to Canada as well. That's the sort of stuff I've been praying for, but to spare Canada from the same fate that will befall its neighbour and identical twin.

Celestial said that America will become a Russian colony, whilst Canada might luck out somewhat by becoming a Russian protectorate instead. It keeps its culture and government intact, but still reliant on Russia to some extent. New York City might get nuked around Christmas season, which is pretty near as we're in November this time around. It will not be the only American city to get this mistreatment, others will also follow.

As what she said, what America has done to other nations will be what they'll do onto it. If America nuked Japan and the Marshall Islands, then it will get nuked by Russia. If America enslaved many Africans, then Americans will get enslaved by the Russians and Chinese. Returning to the dog meat thing, if America constantly accuses the Chinese of eating dogs. But when famine strikes America, that's when Yankees start eating dogs themselves.

It's the whole don't point out the speck in someone's eye, when you have a log in your eye thing as what the Bible pointed out, to the point where America may emerge as perhaps the biggest hypocrite of all the countries around today. As blessings turn into curses and joy turns into mourning, so will America go from being the most powerful country in the world to the most corrupt and least powerful of all. Such is the fate of Mystery Babylon/America to fall at the hands of its enemies, to be hit by asteroids/millstones and no longer play music.

American music will no longer be widely heard on international radio stations, this will be supplanted by music from other countries. I even prayed to God to have Philippine radio stations play more older Philippine music, in addition to Chinese music in case if this happens at all. It wouldn't be easy making new alliances, but America's downfall necessitates a substitute in its place. My preference would be China because I feel this country's too westernised for its own good. Well any other country would do.

But the thing here is that America's going to fail as a country, then as a superpower and it's going to be forgotten in the future. Celestial even said that God's going to revoke this nation-state once and for all, that he's also going to revoke any trace of American influence even in the Philippines. So this is something those in the Philippines should heed do, as America will not be powerful enough to defend us from China.

To make matters worse, we Filipinos blaspheme God a lot that if we reap what we sow, then we're definitely going to be part of China in some way or another. If God allowed Babylon to take over Judah due to his people's sinning, then he'll allow China to do the same thing to the Philippines and likewise Russia with the western world. If it happens, it happens and this is something I've been talking about for some time. Many Filipinos commit sin, we blaspheme the Lord whilst calling ourselves a Christian nation.

As God's had enough of us doing this that he's going to let China take over the Philippines anyways, so if it happens then it's our fault for why we did this to ourselves. And why America will be powerless to stop China from taking over the Philippines, which is saying.

[cinema-hallucinations]

Prompt: Create a movie concept about a competent, but low-powered supervillain team who ended up on the moral good side of a situation and must now navigate a complex web of conflicting interests both within (conflict between members wanting to go legit and other wishing to abuse the newfound public goodwill for even more abhorrent schemes) and outside (a fractured public opinion, villainous reflexes causing PR difficulties, etc.) the team in the aftermath.

Title: Heretic and the Pettycoats

Tagline: Redemption is a messy business, especially when you're still kind of a villain

Logline: The Pettycoats, a ragtag team of low-powered supervillains, accidentally foil a major apocalypse and wake up as unlikely heroes. Now, they must navigate a treacherous landscape of public scrutiny, internal conflict, and their own villainous urges, all while a fractured world decides whether to embrace them or crush them.

Characters:

The Heretic (Leader): A stoic strategist with the power to manipulate probability in very minor ways (think causing a dropped pen here, a lucky bounce there). He's haunted by a dark past and sees this as a chance at redemption, even if it means working with…

Sparks: A hotheaded woman with pyrokinetic abilities limited to igniting small objects like matches or cigarettes. She struggles with the idea of being a "good guy" and sees the potential for personal gain in their newfound fame.

The Gloom: A gloomy and reclusive man who can cast small shadows that mildly inconvenience others. He's content with a life of petty villainy but is dragged along by The Heretic's vision.

The Fixer: A tech-savvy manipulator with zero superpowers but a knack for blackmail and information gathering. He sees the potential to leverage their newfound status for financial gain.

Agent Weaver: A conflicted government liaison tasked with monitoring the Pettycoats and keeping them in line. She sees the potential for their abilities but struggles to trust them.

Plot:

The Pettycoats, a group of low-powered supervillains notorious for causing minor inconveniences (think causing traffic jams, switching supermarket price tags), accidentally stumble upon a plot by The Harbinger, a charismatic cult leader with world-ending ambitions.

Through a series of unexpected mishaps, mostly due to The Heretic's probability manipulation, the Pettycoats manage to disrupt the Harbinger's ritual, saving the world from certain doom. The news explodes, and the Pettycoats, much to their surprise, are hailed as unlikely heroes.

Thrust into the spotlight, the team struggles to adapt. Sparks sees an opportunity for lucrative endorsements ("Sparks brand matches: Light your way to heroism!"), while The Gloom resents the public attention and longs for his quiet life of villainy. The Fixer sees a chance to leverage their newfound fame for blackmail schemes, creating tension with The Heretic, who genuinely wants to use their abilities for good.

The public is divided. Some celebrate the Pettycoats as unexpected saviors, while others remain suspicious of their past and question their motives. Agent Weaver becomes their reluctant handler, tasked with keeping them in line while navigating the complex political landscape surrounding their newfound power.

The climax involves a new threat emerging from the ashes of the Harbinger's failed plot. A rival cult, led by the enigmatic "The Puppeteer," seeks to exploit the public's fear and distrust of the Pettycoats to further their own agenda.

The Pettycoats must overcome their internal conflicts and public scrutiny to face this new threat. They learn that being a hero isn't easy, especially when you're a team of former villains with questionable morals and limited superpowers.

Themes:

Redemption and the struggle to outrun your past.

The burden of responsibility and the difficulty of doing the right thing.

The power of public perception and the line between hero and villain.

Mood & Tone:

The movie will have a gritty, realistic tone similar to Watchmen, Punisher, or Dredd (2012). Humor will be dark and situational, arising from the absurdity of the characters' situation and their attempts to navigate a world that doesn't quite trust them. The focus will be on the moral complexities of the characters' choices and the consequences of their past actions.

[ainsleyhalcyon]

Best AI writing assistant in 2024

Welcome to the Future: AI Writing Assistants in 2024

AI writing assistants, those invisible helpers that live inside our computers, have become indispensable tools in 2024. But what exactly are these digital companions? Let's dive in!

An AI writing assistant is a software equipped with artificial intelligence technology. This tech-savvy tool has the ability to understand human language, generate content, and even offer suggestions to improve writing style. Think of it as your very own personal ghost-writer, ready to lend a hand whenever you're staring at a blank page.

The Benefits of Using AI Writing Assistants

The importance of using AI writing assistants today cannot be overstated. They have become a game-changer in multiple sectors, from business and education to marketing and journalism. The reasons are clear:

Time-saving: No more late-night typing marathons or last-minute content panic. An AI writing assistant can whip up articles, reports, or any other type of document in no time.

Consistency: A brand's voice should be consistent across all platforms. An AI ensures this by learning your style and replicating it flawlessly every time.

Versatility: Whether it's blog posts or social media updates, press releases or product descriptions, an AI writing assistant can do it all.

SEO Benefits of Using AI Writing Assistants

Let's not forget about the SEO benefits! With an AI writing assistant at your side, you're not just creating content—you're optimizing it for search engines too. This means more visibility for your website and better engagement with your audience.

In essence, an AI writing assistant is like a superpower for anyone who needs to write professionally or frequently. It helps you create high-quality content faster and easier than ever before.

So, whether you're a seasoned writer looking to boost productivity or a business owner aiming for that coveted first page on Google results—an AI writing assistant might just be the secret weapon you need in 2024. Stay tuned as we explore the best ones in the market!

Benefits of AI Writing Assistants

Welcome to the realm where sentences sparkle, words work wonders, and paragraphs are polished to perfection. That's the magic of an AI writing assistant! These digital helpers are transforming the way we write content. But how do they do it? Let's dive in and discover the benefits that these AI-powered tools bring to our writing desks.

1. Improved Writing Efficiency

Penning down a compelling piece requires time, effort, and mental energy. But with an AI writing assistant by your side, the process becomes a breeze. These tools can generate multiple pieces of content in mere seconds; a feat impossible for a human writer.

Imagine having a brainstorming partner that never tires or runs out of ideas. You feed in the topic, and voila! The tool generates a perfectly crafted article or blog post. This speed and efficiency are vital for businesses looking to scale up their content production without compromising on quality.

2. Enhanced Creativity and Productivity

An AI writing assistant is like having your very own muse on demand. Stuck with writer's block? No worries. The AI comes up with fresh ideas, interesting angles, and engaging content that can spark your creativity.

Plus, these tools allow you to focus on what you do best: creating! By taking care of mundane tasks such as formatting or generating meta descriptions, an AI writing assistant frees up your time. You can channel this towards ideation and crafting compelling narratives.

3. Grammar and Spelling Correction

Even the best writers make occasional typos or grammar mistakes. Fortunately, these errors are no match for an AI writing assistant! Their grammar correction technology is like having a proofreader by your side round the clock.

These tools analyze your text in real-time, highlighting errors as you type. Whether it's misplaced apostrophes, spelling mishaps or incorrect verb tenses, the AI catches them all. It's a surefire way to ensure your content is grammatically impeccable and typo-free.

4. Language Translation Capabilities

In a world that's more connected than ever, language shouldn't be a barrier to communication. Many AI writing assistants come equipped with translation capabilities. They can translate your text into multiple languages, making your content accessible to a global audience.

This feature is a boon for businesses venturing into new markets. It allows them to create content in the local language without the need for a human translator.

Undeniably, an AI writing assistant is like a trusty sidekick for writers, editors, and content marketers alike. They make the process of creating content more efficient, spark off creativity, ensure grammatical accuracy and bridge language gaps. So go ahead and let these digital helpers revolutionize your writing journey!

Criteria for Choosing the Best AI Writing Assistant

When looking to harness the power of an AI writing assistant, it's essential to have a clear understanding of what makes one stand out from the rest. A myriad of choices are available, each boasting unique features and capabilities. However, not all are created equal. To find the best fit for your specific needs, consider these key criteria.

1. Accuracy and Quality of Generated Content

Ultimately, the value of an AI writing assistant lies in its ability to generate accurate and high-quality content. Look for a tool that can craft coherent sentences, use appropriate vocabulary, and maintain logical flow. Imagine an AI tool that understands the nuances of language, context, and tone - making your content sound human-like rather than robotic.

Consider testing different platforms to evaluate their performance in various writing styles and contexts. Some tools may excel at blogging or SEO articles, while others might shine in creating catchy social media posts or compelling ad copies.

2. Ease of Use and User Interface

A user-friendly interface is a must-have feature for any digital tool. The best AI writing assistants are intuitive and easy to navigate even for first-time users. You don't have time to wrestle with complicated dashboards or puzzling features - you need a tool that gets the job done efficiently without causing unnecessary stress.

Look for platforms that offer a clean design with straightforward functionality. Features like drag-and-drop editing, real-time feedback, and easy access to saved drafts can enhance your writing experience significantly.

3. Advanced Features and Customization Options

Customization is king in today's digital age. The best AI writing assistants provide advanced features that allow you to tailor the tool according to your specific needs. For instance, some platforms offer industry-specific templates, tone adjusters, content formatters, or suggestion engines that help refine your writing style.

Additionally, look for tools that can adapt their writing based on the audience, purpose, or platform. This flexibility can dramatically enhance the effectiveness of your content.

4. Integration with Other Tools and Platforms

In our interconnected world, the ability to integrate with other tools and platforms is a significant plus. Imagine being able to sync your AI writing assistant with your favorite project management tool, email client, or social media platform - allowing for seamless content creation and distribution.

Look for AI writing assistants that offer robust integration capabilities. This not only streamlines your workflow but also ensures consistency across various platforms and tools.

5. Customer Support and Reliability

Lastly, reliable customer support is a critical factor in choosing an AI writing assistant. Despite how advanced or user-friendly a tool may be, there will inevitably be moments when you need help or encounter technical issues. In such situations, responsive and knowledgeable customer support can make all the difference.

Moreover, reliability extends to the software itself. Look for platforms with positive reviews regarding uptime and performance stability. The last thing you want is your writing process interrupted by frequent crashes or slow loading times.

Remember, choosing the right AI writing assistant is a game changer for any writer looking to augment their creative process with artificial intelligence. By focusing on these key criteria - accuracy, ease of use, customization, integration, and support - you'll find a tool that not only elevates your content but also enhances your overall productivity.

1. Junia AI: The Best AI Writing Assistant of 2024

Stepping into the spotlight as the leading AI writing assistant of 2024 is Junia AI, a superstar in the realm of content creation and language processing. Known for its sophisticated technology, Junia AI stands tall amidst its competitors, offering an exceptional blend of features that cater to every writer's needs.

The Magic Behind Junia AI

What makes Junia AI special? It's all about advanced natural language processing (NLP). This powerful tool has an impressive ability to understand, interpret, and generate text that sounds like it was written by a human.

In a world where effective communication is crucial, having a tool that can understand context and nuances is incredibly valuable. Junia AI excels in this area with its contextual understanding feature. It grasps the meaning behind your content, providing relevant suggestions and additions that seamlessly fit with your original text.

But what about the quality of the generated content? Don't worry! Junia AI has you covered. It produces high-quality content that mirrors human writing styles while keeping a consistent tone throughout.

The Limitations of Junia AI

However, no tool is perfect. One area where Junia AI could improve is its support for different languages. While it does an excellent job with English texts, it falls short when dealing with other languages. This limitation might be a challenge for those seeking multilingual support.

Another consideration is the pricing. As they say, quality comes at a price - Junia AI is no exception. Its advanced features come with a relatively high price tag, which might not be suitable for all users.

My Experience with Junia AI

Speaking from my own experience, using Junia AI has been truly transformative. The way it enhances my words and polishes my writing has made it an essential tool in my writing arsenal.

Yes, it does have its downsides, but the positives far outweigh the negatives. The impressive capabilities of Junia AI, combined with its ability to generate impeccable content, make it a worthwhile investment for any serious writer.

As we explore the world of AI writing assistants, remember that choosing the right one is a highly personal decision. What works for one person may not work for another. However, given its expertise in language processing and content generation, Junia AI unquestionably sits comfortably at the top of the list in 2024.

2: MyEssayWriter.ai

As we continue to explore the best AI writing assistants of 2024, MyEssayWriter.ai emerges as an ideal alternative. This AI-powered assistant is designed with a keen focus on academic tasks, specifically essay writing. With its advanced algorithms and innovative features, MyEssayWriter.ai can be a game-changer for students and professionals alike.

Pros of MyEssayWriter.ai

Sophisticated AI-Powered Writing

MyEssayWriter.ai uses advanced artificial intelligence to generate high-quality essays. By understanding the context of the topic, it can draft comprehensive essays that meet academic standards.

Wide Range of Academic Tasks

Whether it's a simple essay or a complex research paper, MyEssayWriter.ai can handle it all. It is designed to accommodate a wide range of academic tasks, making it incredibly versatile.

User-friendly Interface

The user-interface of MyEssayWriter.ai is straightforward and easy to navigate. This makes it accessible even for those who are not tech-savvy.

Cons of MyEssayWriter.ai

Limited Non-Academic Use

While MyEssayWriter.ai excels in academic tasks, it may not be the best fit for non-academic writing needs such as blog posts or marketing copy.

Subscription-Based Model

MyEssayWriter.ai operates on a subscription-based model. This might not be ideal for users looking for one-time use or those on a tight budget.

Reflecting on my personal experience with MyEssayWriter.ai, I found it to be an incredibly efficient tool for academic writing. The quality of content generated was impressive and required minimal editing. Despite some limitations, MyEssayWriter.ai stands out as a strong contender in the realm of AI writing assistants in 2024.

3. Copy AI

In the realm of AI writing assistance, Copy AI has emerged as a formidable contender in 2024. This innovative tool has revolutionized content creation by effortlessly generating engaging and creative content at the click of a button.

Key Features

The effectiveness of Copy AI can be attributed to its impressive features that are designed to meet the diverse needs of writers.

Broad Range of Applications

Copy AI is not limited to generating content for a specific type of writing. It's built to cater to an extensive range of applications. Whether you need captivating product descriptions, professional emails, or compelling social media posts, this tool is equipped to deliver quality content.

Customizable Output

One of the standout features of Copy AI is its customizable output. It allows users to easily adjust the tone and style of the generated content. This makes it highly adaptable to different brand voices and specific audience preferences, offering a level of flexibility that makes it stand out among other tools.

Cons of Copy AI

Despite its impressive features and capabilities, there are certain drawbacks associated with Copy AI that could affect its suitability for all users:

Subscription Required

Like many other AI writing tools on the market, Copy AI operates on a subscription model. This might not be ideal for everyone, especially for those who require the tool for occasional use or writers who are operating on a tight budget.

Potential for Overuse

With its ability to generate content quickly and easily, there's a risk that users may become overly reliant on Copy AI. Overuse could potentially compromise originality and uniqueness in your content as the same tool would be available to numerous users worldwide.

In summary, while Copy AI has certain limitations, it offers substantial benefits which have made it one of the most popular options among AI writing assistants in 2024.

4. Jasper AI

Making our list at number four is Jasper AI, an advanced tool equipped with deep learning capabilities. Its prime feature is its ability to adapt to your writing style, providing personalized assistance.

Key Features

Adaptive Writing Style: Jasper AI learns from your previous inputs and adapts to your writing style over time.

Efficient Content Generation: This tool can quickly generate high-quality content saving you time and effort.

Pros of Jasper AI

Apart from its adaptive capabilities and efficient content generation, there are other advantages to using Jasper AI:

Personalized Experience: The tool's ability to adapt to your writing style offers a unique, personalized writing experience.

Advanced AI Capabilities: With its deep learning technology, it provides more refined and precise outputs.

Cons of Jasper AI

However, there are a few challenges when using Jasper AI:

High Pricing Structure: Compared to other tools on this list, Jasper AI comes with a higher price tag.

Limited Languages Supported: Currently, Jasper only supports English which might be limiting for non-native English speakers.

My Experience with Jasper AI

Despite the cons, my experience with Jasper AI has been positive overall. The tool's ability to adapt to my writing style made the process of content creation smooth and personalized. I found the quality of output quite impressive. However, I do hope that they expand their language support in the future.

5. Rytr

Rytr, an AI writing assistant that is ideal for those on a budget, is the last on our list but not the least. It offers a cost-effective solution without compromising on quality.

Key Features

Affordable Pricing: Rytr stands out with its budget-friendly pricing model. This makes it an appealing choice for startups or individual content creators who are mindful of their budget.

User-Friendly Interface: The platform comes with an intuitive design that is easy to navigate even for those who are new to AI writing tools. This makes the process of content creation smooth and hassle-free.

Pros of Rytr

Variety of Writing Modes: Despite its affordability, Rytr offers various writing modes such as blog post mode, essay mode, and creative story mode among others. This allows users to create a range of content matching their specific needs.

Fast Content Generation: Rytr can quickly generate content, thereby saving you valuable time which can be invested elsewhere.

Cons of Rytr

Limited Features: While Rytr is affordable, it doesn't offer as many features as some of the more advanced options on this list. The lack of advanced features may limit its utility for certain complex writing tasks.

Possible Quality Issues: Some users have reported occasional inconsistencies in the quality of the content generated. At times, additional editing may be required to refine the output.

My Experience with Rytr

My experience with Rytr has been largely positive. I appreciate its simple interface and quick content generation capability. However, I did notice that the quality of content varied at times and needed some tweaking. Overall, it's a great tool for basic writing needs and is excellent value for money.

The Takeaway

As we explore the digital landscape of 2024, it's clear that AI writing assistants have changed the way we write. They have become essential companions, helping us overcome the challenges of creating content with ease and efficiency.

A Recap: The Best AI Writing Assistant in 2024

Junia AI stole the show with its advanced language understanding abilities and high-quality content generation. Its ability to understand context makes it an ideal tool for those looking to add depth and dimension to their writing. It does have a few downsides like limited language support and relatively high pricing but its benefits are worth it.

That doesn't mean that our alternative wasn't a worthy competitor. It offered its own unique set of advantages that will definitely appeal to different writers based on their individual needs and preferences.

Unlock Your Potential with AI Writing Assistants

Using these tools is more than just a trend; it's a way to improve productivity and content quality. They're like your virtual partners, ready to help you create engaging, error-free content while saving you time.

With AI writing assistants, you can:

Increase your productivity: They handle repetitive tasks, giving you more time to focus on what really matters.

Boost your creativity: With suggestions and prompts, they spark new ideas and help you overcome writer's block.

Improve your writing: Their grammar and spelling corrections ensure your content is polished and professional.

Overcome language barriers: Some even offer translation features, making your content accessible to a wider audience.

So let's embrace the change! It's time to step into the future of writing with an AI assistant by our side. Remember, these tools are here to enhance our abilities, not replace them. They're designed to boost our creativity, not suppress it.

In this ever-changing world of AI, choosing the best writing assistant depends on your specific needs and goals. Whether it's Junia AI or another tool, the perfect assistant for you is out there. It's all about finding the one that fits well with your writing style and helps you achieve your content creation goals.

Don't just write...write smarter, write better, with the help of an AI writing assistant!