#So need to learn how to study and such
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vio1315 · 2 years ago
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Oh right 
I keep meaning to do a life update
Because long time followers remember when I posted a lot of personal struggles on here and I like never follow up on that stuff
And have since stopped posting personal stories as often whoops
Honestly I don’t remember everything I left as a loose thread that could be ‘is she okay’ so basically:
>Yes I am okay
>Most the stuff I was having trouble with happened like 5+ years ago now
>I am still pretty shut in, but I have a good job and I do go out once a week technically
>Much more mentally stable, I don’t really get the sort of empty feelings I used to anymore
>Every day I am unsure if I am like 🤖 to other people, or if I live normally. But I have unworked a lot of the emotional repression stuff I was doing subconsciously, and have gained a capacity for the ‘feeling of love’ (since love isn’t really a feeling, but you know the feeling I mean). Idk if I never experienced it before, but if I did it was Extremely rare compared to now. I certainly had devotion, but idk
It’s like ‘oh my prayers were answered on this topic again :0 ‘
I think I am pretty content generally, but I still don’t have happy feelings or fun feelings that often on my own, but this is super normal for me and doesn’t bother me the way the ‘void feelings’ did. It just vibing
>I did get a few extra sensory issues, probably from being shut in, but nothing that makes it any harder to go out. I should go out more still, but not many ideas of where to go for now
>I lost touch with the rest of my rl friends more or less (゚⊿゚) I went through a big thing of making myself not burn bridges and then like 4 months later they stopped contacting me anyways. I haven’t really felt any issue about it so have been leaving it be, but I guess I’ll crack that case back open if it ever starts to feel like a big thing that needs to be done
>My family is doing pretty well : ) 
>Story stuuffffff. I went through about a year of work to make my to do list better, so now I can focus on writing, sort of. And hopefully I can finish my script for TTF in good time now after the Big Delay of relaying the foundation and needing to get life in order. It will take a Long time because I insist on doing all 10 arcs before starting to draw it, so like... I still am mostly gonna be quiet on the topic for awhile
>Life plans? Nope, never. I still live very in the present, so I will just continue my job till I get fired probably and try my best to keep using my free time well. Or start
>Nobody wonders about this but I swear to you, vitamins/supplements make me sick every time I take them. Like literally sick. Like with germs and things. How????? How???? They had nothing in common between the three diff supplements, but each time I started I would get sick for like 2 weeks or a month ??? But I will keep trying to see if this is actually happening because ??? How ????
>Oh yeah, I am trying to get my health better and actually gained much weight 🥳 maybe someday exercise too, but I wanna tighten daily schedule first
>I am looking at some other mental disorders where I think ‘do I have that???’ But just for the sake of communication. I still don’t really need medication to manage the strange stuff. Coping mechanisms generally work pretty good for me, and learning to weed out bad ones and so on. I haven’t felt ANXIOUS in a bit now, and idk maybe not as often. I know I was like a year or two ago, but it goes down every year overall.
Lots of things that used to make me anxious just don’t so much anymore
That’s everything I can really think of right now
Life is basically good overall for me. 
Health is good for me, though I still need to work on actually doing things to be good to my body.
Socializing is pretty good in the forms I do it, but I still need to go out more to prevent my brain from getting weird about ‘sounds and feelings I can’t control’ and all
Fam : ) 
Everything is chill actually. I basically vent here less now just because I have more opportunity to vent directly to people when there’s a need to wjdnejd but I don’t think anything major comes up that often
But also my emotional memory is really low hwjdnwjd like I know for a fact a year or two ago there was a month where I was super unwell and stressed, but legit idk what that felt like, I just know it happened
So maybe the frequency Could be similar, but I wouldn’t know it 🤔 but certainly less major events happen, and that’s good with me
Just an update cuz I realize it’s easy to vent and all, but when things resolve, it’s less interesting to talk about, so you leave people hanging unintentionally, since posting directly on here barely feels like talking to anyone anyways, super easy to let that go
I am not a private person honestly, so hope this doesn’t seem weird to anyone widjsjdn
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hinamie · 4 months ago
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playing around w slightly different hair renders
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk art#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#itafushi#fushiita#yuuji#megumi#cries megumi fought tooth n nail..... i refused 2 flip the canvas tho >:(#i vastly prefer drawing him facing right bc fr some reason it makes his hair look better silhouette-wise#so having him face left is alr a Challenge#but also having him slightly look down (difficult angle + changes the silhouette) had me bashing my head in2 th TABLE#same thing happened earlier this month w gardening megu middle pose . i did not learn my lesson#but even worse w this one yuuji's head is blocking th main pointy part tht basically carries the entirety of the shape language#u can imagine my distress i am sure#anyway th render made me a lot happier with it thank god. colours hard carry bless <3333#i didn't plan on making it a full sheet but i needed 2 remind myself that im good at drawing megumi#so i threw in solos of each of them n tried slightly different render flavours#idk how Different all of them look visually but th process fr each ws Very different so i am satisfied#fight aside this ws useful i think! got 2 break out some Clunkier chalks n dust off a few of my smoother blended brushes#think i picked up some things i can keep also !! which ws. u kno. the Goal#tbh every time i do art studies i feel like i am kirby#one time i got called an art ditto by one of my fav artist mutuals when i did a style challenge#SUCH high praise from her it lives in my mind i take it out on days when i feel like trash#it doesnt Sound good when u say u r good at copying but real talk it is such a good skill i am very happy 2 have it in my arsenal
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Eldritch/not-entirely-human Grunkle Stan stories have been eating away at my brain, so I have a silly little concept of Mimic!Stan.
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He and his Mystery Shack are both mimics that lure tourists in as a literal "tourist trap" to gather and devour them! Since the house is alive, it raises a few (read: several) child safety concerns that lead to a LOT of rules to be created for Dipper and Mabel to follow when they eventually arrive, such as:
Be careful not to get lost in the winding hallways! The Mystery Shack is bigger on the inside, and you don't want to end up in the wrong areas.
Don't go through randomly appearing doors, they may eat you.
If you think you feel the walls around you breathing and the floor beneath you shifting, no, you don't.
If you think the walls feel a bit damp, you're imagining it.
Watch your fingers around windowsills! You wouldn't want to lose any of them.
Don't linger too long under the doorframes; it may start feeling like they are slowly constricting around you.
#his shack is basically his big ass pet- they have a weird bond thing going on <3#if the house is fed- so is Stanley and vice versa#also I need you guys to know that my dumbass already developed lore for this AU even tho it was supposed to be a small one because ofc I di#BASICALLY this guy is NOT Stanford's twin. like at all.#Stanford was born an only child that went to uni fine and came to gravity falls where he met “The Mimic” aka Stan#and Ford was fascinated by Stan and wanted to study him- while the latter was just like: omg friend!!#and Stan's way of showing his love as a Mimic was to replicate Ford's appearance EXACTLY to show that he cares and loves him#because in Mimic love language being able to imitate a human PERFECTLY down to every detail is an impressive show of attentiveness and care#Ofc Ford was thrilled by the awesomeness of this (*cough* nerd) but was also like: so how tf do I explain this extra clone of me that#sticks by my side like a barnacle#so the twin theory was made- Ford made Stan tweak his appearance just a little so that it doesn't look too uncannily similar to himself#and then Stan learned more about humans and came to adopt a persona himself#this is actually a way more silly AU than my other one because Ford- Stan and everyone else are straight up just chilling here#welp!#gravity falls#gravity falls au#Mimic Stan AU#stan pines#stanley pines#grunkle stan#grunkle ford#stanford pines#ford pines#the mystery shack#mystery shack#mimics#tw scopophobia#tw body horror#tw gore#my art
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deoidesign · 6 months ago
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Doing master studies the only way I know how: Stealing them and making them my guys.
(Barberini Faun)
(The Fallen Angel - Alexandre Cabanel)
(Covent Garden - William Bruce Ellis Rankin)
#obviously. not actually theft...#i was gonna say these are public domain but covent garden actually isnt yet#it will be. in two years.#thats the most different one though like i added a whole new guy..#maybe not the most different. barberini faun is pretty different i just took the post#pose#its barely even a study. thats not true#but. what was i saying.#oh its not theft it's study... the purpose is to learn!!! but also. if im gonna spend like 2 days on something...#its GONNA be my guys#otherwise. idk. i only want to spend 30 or so minutes per study#just to get the notes down and the practice for the skill im working on#i dont get all that much more out of completely rendering a master study. PERSONALLY.#at least definitely not enough to be worth taking 100x longer#but making them my characters makes it worth going all the way!!!#plus it's good practice w like. not just going 1:1 but actually genuinely interpreting whats there so i can manipulate it...#again. personally. this is just how i worm#WORK#youd better worm bitch#uhm... anyways yeah. ive done lots of study but why TF share it LMAO i dont even save it#its just to learn. ive got 1 million other drawings to save and look at later.#once the learning is done it's done its job and i have no need anymore#this is why the only studies i have are from school. i had to save and upload them#well. ok also i dont study as much now BUT in my defense im a full time artist#an hour or so a week is different ok im learning while working too.. i learned how to learn and i do it all the time now#master studies#digital art#my art#illustration#my ocs
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crescentfool · 1 year ago
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orpheus and thanatos 💚
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ribs02 · 1 year ago
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i drew chubby nami in my sketchbook the other day and she looked so pretty so i think im gonna draw her like this from now on
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skunkes · 7 months ago
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reposting some old doodles i still enjoy a bit
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waterghostype · 8 months ago
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was assigned to do art for school based on the color green so of course i chose the green ninja (accompanied by long xiaojiao)
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moeblob · 7 months ago
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Impulsively shoving a guy's hand in your mouth after having the thought "oh just like when my little sister used to prick herself on a rose thorn" and then immediately being treated like a pet who ate something they shouldn't have? Wonderful. Thank you, Thane.
(also not pictured is Thane apparently trying to scrape your tongue with his hand BEFORE pouring the holy water down your throat because NO. BAD.)
#bewitching sinners#palmier baker#thane verashkova#accidentally ingesting vampire blood because of big brother impulses is wild#also the reason hes so alarmed is bc in that world you kinda soulbond to others and thats how you soulbond as a vampire#you drink each others blood and so hes flipping out because while he hasnt had your blood yet#hey your ex is going to absolutely kill me if we bond on accident and i dont think i wanna die like that!#which is VERY cool to know thank you thane im so glad your concern is actually less of being bound#but about being murdered thats really cool#also the fact thane is found in the library studying with arshem my beloved ex and is BRIBED TO LEARN RECIPES#by arshem with vials of mixed blood hes just CASUALLY CARRYING is like hey man#thank you for being group mum i love you for it#and then later on arshem actually is like oh thane you can drink my blood later since you havent fed for a while#and thane is super chipper about it like HECK YEAH THANKS !#hey boys youre adorable thank you for existing in this incredibly fucked up world#im in a choke hold with this otome im sorry#you ever try to be nice to a guy and think surely this will help him a little bit then you get background lore#and you realize youre probably making things A LOT WORSE FOR HIM by being nice#im going through it with my emotions as i learn about palmiers actions pre game swap so like#dude please i am BEGGING YOU palmier please have ONE redeeming quality in you at some point#i want to adopt one of the love interests as my son though and im obsessed with the fact he can speak fish#my son can speak to the fish and he gives me fish as a present bc i might need it later#and i do actually in fact need said fish later for another quest#thankyou my son i love you and i appreciate you youre amazing#gonna have to draw arshem at some point and everyone will immediately go yeah that makes sense
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somewhereincairparavel · 2 months ago
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I'm so immersed in my jason grace new rome uni fic that I'm studying ancient roman law terms using this as an excuse. help.
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shaxza · 1 year ago
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bluastro-yellow · 1 year ago
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everyone Noticed but nobody dares to speak because this might actually keep him in check
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bonicedemandarina · 1 year ago
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MATTHEW AND THE DEMON HIPSTER CHICKS!!!!!!!!!
I love them so much they're so iconic tbh
Sooo I recently read and watched scott pilgrim and this guy ended up as my fav so here's some fanart
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feath-r-hopper · 5 months ago
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its just a quick procedure! find happiness through surgery!
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rigelmejo · 1 month ago
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learning to code!
When I was 9 years old, I learned enough html to code neopets pages, my own geocities websites, and I even made forums on my own sites so my friends could all roleplay together or rant together lol. And then? I forgot so much. I no longer no how to make a forum, or even a 'next page' button - so even the dream of just making a simple blog or webnovel site feels like a huge hurdle now. (9 year old me could probably figure it out in 2 hours).
So I'm relearning! I figured this would be a fun post to place resources I find for coding, since there's coding languages, and I figure maybe if you like running you're blog then you also might be interested in tools for making blogs!
First, for those of you who miss the old geocities and angelfire type of sites to make your own free site on: neocities.org
You can make free sites you can code yourself, the way 9 year old me did. A lot of people have made SUCH amazing sites, it's baffling my mind trying to figure out how they did, I definitely wish I could make an art portfolio site even a fourth as cool as some of the sites people have made on here.
And for those pressed for time, who aren't about to learn coding right now: wix.com is the place I recommend for building a site, it requires no coding skill and is fairly straightforward about adding pages or features by clicking buttons. I used it to make my art portfolio site, I am testing out using it for my webnovel - the alternative is Wordpress, but wix.com is letting me basically make a wordpress blog Inside my own site. It's very beginner friendly in terms of "how the fuck do I set up a 'sign up for updates' message and have my site actually email these people my novel updates?" and "I need a 4x20 grid of my art down the page, that lets people click the art to see it's information and make it bigger."
I did neocities.org's little html tutorial today, it's the part of html I DID remember (links, paragraphs, headers).
My next step is to go through htmldog.com's tutorials. They go from beginner, to intermediate, to CSS. Unlike many a coding tutorial I've seen, they explain what program on your computer you need to WRITE the code in and then how to save it and how to open it. (You'd think this isn't a big deal but I've been looking into how to learn Python for months and I can't find a tutorial explaining what fucking program to write my python in... notepad? do I need something else? I don't fucking know!! My dad finally gave me a printed textbook which supposedly tells you what to download to start... I learned C++ in college and for that you needed Visual Basic to code C++, so I figured I needed Something to Write the fucking python IN.)
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ame-to-ame · 5 months ago
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still working on tweening and etc but small self-indulgent sneak peek hehe
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