#So don't come to me calling me delusional or telling me it doesn't mean anything because I already know lmao.
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willbyerswithpowersblog · 2 years ago
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kicking my feet giggling twirling my hair over a small detail that means absolutely nothing
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odinsblog · 1 year ago
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“One weird, silver lining positive from the WGA's strike has been a sense of calm over a reality that has plagued me with anxiety for years — the fact that despite having a great agent, manager, and lawyer, despite having been in hundreds of rooms with top execs and producers, despite having pitched countless networks, and despite having sold multiple pilots and pitches, I still work in food and bev. For so long, it felt like such an embarrassment in so many ways because it felt like I was the only one who was biding time in between sales with a side hustle. When I would tell people at work that I wrote television, they'd look at me like I had ten heads, or like I was delusional. They couldn't IMAGINE someone who *actually* wrote television would also be asking them what temp they wanted their salmon.
But the reality is, TV money goes fast, especially when it's just a pilot sale. And if shit doesn't get picked up to series, that money only lasts for so long. Being responsible meant swallowing my pride and keeping a job that was more consistent and steady but also gave me the ability to take pitch meetings, to write on my down time, do rewrites, answer e-mails, and take notes calls.
And for so long I thought I was a minority in that regard. Like I had done something wrong to not be successful enough to rely solely on my career as a writer.
Yet the strike has pushed SO many stories to the forefront of writers doing the exact same thing I've done, GOOD writers, great writers, writers who shit I watch all the time, whose names I instantly recognize, whose reputations in this industry precede them. So when the studios leaked that the goal was to bleed writers dry, to make it so we lost our homes, I had to laugh. Writers like me will literally do anything to keep the dream of writing alive. It's in us. It never goes away, no matter how many steaks you server, how many martinis you mix, how many cold calls you make, how many Uber passengers you pick up, how many pizzas you have to deliver. We always always always find a way to make it to that next great hope of a pitch, a sale, a green light.
And that's how you know that the CEOs are so fucking out of touch with reality. With the industry. With the POINT of the industry the point for most (not all, but most) has never been to be filthy rich, or own a yacht, or even have a membership to SoHo house. It's been to make something we love. To see it come to life, and make other people happy, or sad, or angry, or scared. To take this story you have kicking around your head and turn it into some epic journey. To be part of the process of making worlds and characters come to life. To tell stories.
The CEO's point has been to make as much money as humanly possible. And so they think that's all there is motivating writers. it's not. It never has been. Just because those CEO's wouldn't wait tables or mix drinks or drive a Lyft in order to keep a dream going, doesn't mean the rest of us wouldn't. The CEO's don't have a dream, they have a lifestyle. And I promise you a dream is a much better motivator than a yacht or a Porsche.
Try to bleed us dry, guys. Just because you'd let your own dream bleed to death, doesn't mean we would. We will always find a way to keep it alive.”
—Stefanie Williams, a tv writer on strike
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edenesth · 4 months ago
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[9:15 PM]
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"Oh my god, that guy is totally your type!" a girl squealed, nudging her friend to look at the gorgeous man across the street.
Her friend giggled, shushing her, "You're right, but stop being so obvious! He's gonna think we're weird!"
"I doubt it. If anything, I think he's already got his eyes on you," she replied, nodding towards him. And she was right—he was looking in her friend's direction, a charming smile on his face as he bit his lip shyly. "Will you go talk to him?"
"I-I mean, I don't know..."
Oh god, I don't need this right now.
You rolled your eyes, eavesdropping on the conversation in front of you. Typical young girls. The light had turned green, and they were still busy debating whether to approach the tall, handsome guy across the street. "Excuse me. Last I checked, your father doesn't own the road. If you're not planning to move, please step aside. Some of us have places to be," you grumbled, pushing past them.
One of them scoffed, annoyed. "Ugh, whatever! Keep that attitude, and no man will ever want you, lady!"
You snorted, nodding sarcastically. "Yes, thank you. I definitely need advice from delusional little girls like you."
"Wha—delusional?! Who do you think you're calling delusional…" Her words trailed off as she watched you walk straight into the welcoming arms of the dreamy guy they had been ogling moments ago. The realisation hit, and embarrassment washed over them. That man had been looking at you all along, not at either of them.
Your boyfriend chuckled, holding you close and kissing your head. "Oh my love, you're so cute when you're annoyed. Did you really have to call them out like that, hm? They would've realised I was yours by the time you got here anyway."
You huffed. "I'd like to see you be so graceful if you heard two guys talking about me the way they just did about you."
He grinned, squeezing you tighter. "Oh baby, you know damn well that I can handle it."
Pulling away slightly, you glared up at him, irritated because he was right and you knew it. This annoyingly perfect man. "I do, and I hate that you're right." He laughed, leaning in to capture your lips in a loving kiss. "Oh come on, you know you love it."
"I do love it... love you, Yuyu."
He softened. "I love you too, baby."
Biting your lip, you cupped his face. "Tell me, my wonderful amazing boyfriend... are those two still watching?"
"Oh my god," he rolled his eyes. "Were you just trying to show off and make them jealous? They left as soon as they realised what was happening."
You groaned, pushing him away and starting your walk back to your shared home. "Ugh, you're telling me we did all that and no one even enjoyed the show?"
He gasped. "A show?! Come here, you—"
Little did you know, that was a lie. The girls were still watching enviously as he chased after you, your shrieks echoing across the quiet streets on a Wednesday night as he tickled your face with endless kisses as playful punishment.
Damn, I guess we were quite delusional...
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ATEEZ Masterlist
Look what you did to me, @itstheghostofmypast, I haven't been able to stop thinking about Yuyu lately and it's all your fault🙈💕besides that, man's been looking mighty fine lately, it's hella annoying.
Hope y'all enjoyed this random little timestamp HAHA and as always, let me know your thoughts! <3
General ATEEZ Tag list:
@aurasblue @marievllr-abg @itsvxlentine @minghaoslatina @huachengsbestie01 |
@evidive @weedforthoughtz @minkiflwr @cheolliehugs @ho3-for-yunho |
@the-kpop-simp @itstheghostofmypast @vantediary @green-agent @skzline |
@sharksandminhos @writingwieny @heyitsmetonid @tinyteezer @hollxe1 |
@pandabur666 @vampzity @tournesol155 @lilactangerine @oddracha |
@haven-cove @idfkeddieishot @vic0921 @vnessalau @apriecotte |
@bangtannie7 @vtyb23
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corollaservant · 6 months ago
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oh noooo kinks post is gone 😭😭
buddy, you lurkin? this was up for an hour 😳 jk jk—this was filthy, made me feel like i was too disgusting on the internet or shadowbanned. anyways yk what? here you go (cause it was fun to write) <3
(18+) MHA kinks (shiggy, overhaul, dabi)
cw: coercion/gaslighting, edging (lol?), s/m, asphyxiation(implied), kai's mysophobia (the correct term is microphobia but anyways)
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Shigaraki: i think he’s into gaslighting and coercion and ik the latter doesn’t classify as a kink (more like an offense) but hear me out:
he brought you to that miserable bar the LoV hangs out in and can’t stop touching you, while you’re forced to sit on his lap. you love public, right? well, no and he knows. whether the LoV watches or not doesn't matter, he wants to see your attitude change, once you can't hide the fact he's fucking you over fabric anymore. his cock twitches, when he stops and you silently beg with your eyes. he'll tell you that he thought you didn't like this while you’ll apologize for even thinking that.
when alone, he’ll have you sprawled on the bed, parting your legs and asking you which you prefer, his fingers or tongue. you’ll brokenly breathe out a “fingers, please” as he’ll sneer and..oblige. he’s clearly skilled, his fingertips tease your cunt as if he’s strumming close chords on a guitar and fuck—you look pretty as shit watching him push them inside. ‘’so you’re saying that you don't like my tongue, yeah?’’ he’ll feign sorrow, you never said that but he makes you reflect on it. ‘’you know what i think? i think you’ll like my tongue just fine’’ he’ll tell you and start sucking on the swelled nub as you tremble. ‘’actually.. you’ll like it more’’
once you shamelessly cum on his tongue exhausted, he’ll continue. ‘’ready for the main event?’’ he’ll ask as you beg him to at least wait a second, you ache down there but he obviously doesn’t care. ‘’there’s no time to wait..come on baby, you know it feels better the second time around.’’ he’ll tell you as his tip splits your folds. you ultimately consider that he might be right after all. actually, he’s never wrong.
Overhaul: this man has an edging kink.. before you say anything, it’s not what you think.
he’ll have you on that examination table (not too heavy on his medical kink tho), mask and gloves on, of course what did you think? that he’d make an exception? the fact he’s even touching you is enough boundaries crossed for him. his gloved hand will spread your juices across your pussy, as he winces behind the bird mask. he hates dirt, bodily fluids, liquids, any bodily emission/discharge, call it whatever you want. the moment he senses your pulse and legs jerking, he’ll remove his hand in fear you might cum on his gloves. you’ll whimper upset but he doesn’t really care, you should thank him for allowing you this proximity in the first place.
same with sex. condoms with him is like the concept of gravity — self fucking explanatory. sometimes he’ll even use two. don’t get him wrong, it’s not like you are the problem, it’s more like your body, he feels like he purifies you each time he thrusts calculated in your cunt (he's delusional). he likes you being vocal as long as you don’t accidentally spit on him, which will earn you a slap.
to prove that the issue is not you, the man will not allow himself to cum inside you, even with the (2) condoms on. he just prefers transmitting the ‘filth’ directly onto you, which means he’ll have you pump his cock and receive all his load (wherever it lands, he makes sure it's angled towards you). 
he's a weirdo of course, but he makes up for it in aftercare. he sterilizes you like there’s no tomorrow. if you’re lucky and you make him cum quick and clean, he might offer a cup of tea and your favorite snack. 
Dabi: sadomasochism. i’ve seen both variations separately done for him before — i just think he’s both.
obviously he’s more into the first (sadism). will treat you like a potato sack, lifting you up without asking, throwing (literally throwing) you to the bed, not caring about where you’ll land and ripping/burning the fabric that clings onto you. assaults your cunt—spits on it and slaps the clit with his hands (sometimes too hard, it makes you cry).
facefucks you the minute you get a hold of his cock, he doesn’t even give you a second, he will grab your head and move it to an unforgiving pace. definitely a cheek slapper — needs to feel his dick in your gums from outside. he might pinch your nose shut and leave you with no airway to..survive. but it’s ok, you make it out alive.
has ropes and recently bought a leash and a collar. it’s red with a black handle and he uses it each time you talk too much. might get bored just holding the handle as he needs to touch (bruise) you, so he’ll hang it to the bed’s end and just pull at the steel. shoots his cum inside only when you're loud enough to make his ears ring. (rip neighbors, they're already considering moving out after they called the cops on him and he almost fried them)
until..
the thing is.. Dabi lives in the past, he doesn’t share his life with anyone so how is he supposed to not dwell on it by himself? has a lot of inflicted pain he can’t share but subconsciously craves. the first time you take liberty in causing him pain ever so little is accidental. you are on top, he’s setting the pace, sure, but your weight falls on his face as your arms enclose his neck. you’re not trying, hell, you don’t even know how to choke someone properly (why would you?) but you need to hold on to something and you think you’re imagining it when you hear a very soft moan. no, you’re definitely imagining it. it will cross your mind later on.
after that, you try to experiment in the territory, you’re in missionary and he thrusts inside you while you bring his neck close and squeeze again. this time you deliberately apply pressure as he hisses a fuck so.. you slap him. it’s a light, small smack on his cheek, again, you don’t want to piss him off but he groans, this time louder and you grin. you might end up slapping him harder the more the sex progresses, the staples hurt your knuckles but he’s making desperate (sexy) sounds.
he’s not gonna be descriptive since he is waay too embarrassed (you will never hear a ‘’shit, i love it when you cause me pain, babe’’) but you don’t care, his expressions tell you everything you need to know.
the next time you’re on top and test the waters, you grab the leash and collar from the nightstand and raise a brow. that’s how most of the communication flows, with mute understanding. he’ll huff in annoyance while his hips involuntarily buck up and he’ll mutter: ‘’shit, whatever.. get this over with.’’ (i hc he calls you bro when embarrassed lol) breath already hitched as you adjust the buckle to his neck. safe to say you’re more than proud to see him fall apart, even if tears never spill from his eyes. 
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stclaretarot · 1 month ago
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PICK A CARD⭒ how will your future child make you proud?
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reminder that this is a general reading and messages found here may not apply to everyone. take what resonates, leave what doesn't, and don't force anything if it does not fit.
BOOK A READING WITH ME · LINKTREE · 18+ PATREON · TIPS ♡ tips, bookings, and feedback are highly appreciated!
GROUP ONE
cards · queen of swords, ace of cups, knight of cups, page of swords (reversed), the moon.
channelled songs · hello stranger by kai. welcome to the machine by pink floyd. brenda’s got a baby by 2pac.
my dear group one ♡ your future child will make you proud by going against everything placed against them --every expectation and naysay -- in order to go after their dreams and do what they love.
your child may be born with disabilities or may become disabled with time. they may just be disadvantaged, as in having less money and opportunities in comparison to their peers. they may also fall pregnant and become a parent at a young age.
despite this, they will never lose sight of what they want from life and will go after it guns blazing and head held high.
though, for some time, they may wallow and feel hopeless because of the barriers that exist between them and achieving what they want to achieve, they will still come out on the other side surer than ever that nothing is going to stop them. that they will be successful by any means necessary. that they will achieve what they want to achieve, even if all odds are stacked against them.
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GROUP TWO
cards · nine of cups, queen of cups, eight of cups, six of wands, the magician.
channelled songs · love at first sight by the front bottoms. born hater by epik high. pricey by nct 127. 
my dear group two ♡ even as a child, your future child will be the kind of person who knows what they are worth and never accepts less than that. 
this is something that may have taken you a long time to learn -- to speak up for yourself, to not let people walk all over you or disrespect you, to enter rooms as if you belong there and not let anyone tell you otherwise. but, for your child, this will all come naturally. 
some people may call your future child a “diva” or say that they think too highly of themselves, but every time they say that you will just roll your eyes because that is exactly how you want your child to be. 
your child will respect themselves so much and have such high standards that they will not tolerate even the slightest disrespect. even as a little kid. picture this, your child is having a playdate with the neighbour’s child; your child will split the toys equally between the two of them, then the neighbour’s child will start taking from your child’s pile. instead of just letting that happen, your child will say, “these are mine and these are yours, if you want to share, you have to ask, don’t just take.”
they will be so good at setting their boundaries, which is largely thanks to you and how you raised them.
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GROUP THREE
cards · ten of swords, seven of swords (reversed), three of wands, nine of swords, the hierophant.
channelled songs · el baile del perrito by wilfrido vargas. every little thing i do by soul for real. the hard way by the front bottoms.
my dear group three ♡ your future child will make you proud in that they will never take no for an answer. your child will be fearless, and will fearlessly defend themselves, even when everyone else shoots them done and calls them delusional -- or even insane.
they will be persistent, stubborn, and headstrong -- in the best way possible. in the way that will make them a good entrepreneur and successful business owner. in the way that will ensure that doors always open for them -- because, in many ways, they force these doors to open for them.
they will be someone who has a certain expectation for their life and will not accept anything less than that. if they want to be a doctor, and they keep getting rejected, they will keep working towards it and applying until they get accepted. if they want to be an attorney, and they fail the bar exam, they will do it again and again and again until they pass. if they want to be a business owner and their first business fails, that’s fine, they’ll take what they learnt and start another one.
they will never give up. not on anything, least of all not on themselves.
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bizbat · 9 months ago
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your jason todd hcs are sooooo good omg!!! do you have any hcs specifically for when he has a crush on the reader, like how he might act, specifically if the reader is oblivious and really doesn’t think that she’s his type / thinks he’s joking if he says anything flirty?
When They're In Love - Jason Todd (Crush Edition)
🕸️Spiderverse Masterlist🕸️
🐼JJK Masterlist🐼
~ Fem terms + Pet names used for reader.
~ You can find part one of these hcs here, and part two here.
~ You can find more of my works here.
~ These can be read as a sort of part three/prequel kinda.
~Fic at the end.
~ Tw for : Blood, Knives, Needles, Vomit. (All slight)
~Thank you for asking! Hope you enjoy, sorry this took so long :(
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You would never know that Jason has a crush on you.
For the most part, he wont talk to you any differently than he will anyone else.
Maybe he won't jokingly insult you, or be super sarcastic around you, but I think that's kind of as far as he'd go.
Unless you're a close friend or family member, you'd probably have no clue he had a crush based on the way he talks to you.
But the little actions and things he does for you are so obvious.
He's the type to hold open doors for you, all the while staring other people dead in the eye as it shuts in their face.
He somehow always just "randomly" has your favorite snack on hand, or a whole collection of books by your favorite author.
I think he'd be touchy, unless he knows you don't like being touched.
If you like or don't mind it, he'd have his arm constantly thrown over your shoulder, always be leaning against you, always resting a hand on your hip.
If you're shorter than him, he does that super annoying thing where he rests his elbow on your head.
He is so lame omg.
But bc he's kinda like this with everyone, no one would fault you for not understanding his hints.
He's like the opposite though.
You said hi to him this morning? You must be in love with him.
You smiled at him today instead of Dick? He's already planning the wedding.
What's that? You said he smells nice? Have his babies. (If you can/want to)
Our delusional king.
He doesn't think you don't get his flirting.
He'd think you're fully aware and are flirting back.
Again, our delusional king.
You probably won't get it until something really serious happens and he comes to you instead of Bruce or Roy.
He'd probably try to get into things you're interested in.
Listens to all your favorite songs, reads your favorite books, etc.
And he's not subtle about it bc he is in fact, a loser.
He'll recommend a song by your favorite artist and then be like "idk why but this just reminded me of you lol"
LOSER. Can you guys tell i'm a big believer in the "jason todd is secretly a massive loser" agenda? Cuz I am. :|
And then he listens when you go on rambles about how great the things you like are and how much they mean to you.
I said he'll do things just to hear you talk about them, and I think he'd do that when he has a crush on you too.
He just loves your voice and likes hearing you talk.
He smiles at you so softly when he thinks you aren't looking.
You could be bumming out and he'll look at you with heart eyes like yeah, future spouse right there.
I don't think he'd be a big user of social media, but if you were, he'd get a whole account just to like and comment of your pictures.
user94820860038466 commented: You look very pretty in this picture.
Comments like an old man bc he has very little understanding of the internet.
He'd probably help you take pictures and fight with other people in your comment section if they're too down bad or creepy.
He doesn't strike me as the jealous type bc once again, he's so delusional he pretty much already thinks you're dating.
Nicknames nicknames nicknames.
Calls you so, so many nicknames.
Angel, doll, sweetheart, maybe even babe.
He constantly talks about you when you aren't there.
Lian and Roy know so much about you before they even meet you.
He'd do anything for you.
The store is actually about a mile in the other direction, but yeah he can get you your favorite drink.
He does not like that food at all and the owner of the store despises him, but he will not return to you empty handed best believe.
He was actually going to wear that hoodie today, but it looks so much better on you you should keep it!
~ Drabble Starts Here. ~
It's just like every other night in Gotham City. It's cold, and wet, and it smells like smoke and garbage that's been left out in the sun.
The only barrier between you and the chilled, musty air outside is a single sheet of glass; the fire escape window of your fifth floor apartment. It's comforting. The glass is, of course, bulletproof, and the seal around the sill is tight, so no gases ever manage seep in. It pays to have a decent landlord, especially in Gotham.
It's funny, but you really never think about that window. You mostly keep it shut and locked, except in the summer, when you can smell your neighbor in the building next door cooking all types of delicious aromatic dishes, or when it's just too hot and you decide the risk of heatstroke is greater than the risk of airborne psychosis. It never occurs to you just how well it keeps you safe, just how well it keeps things out.
It occurs to Jason, though. In fact, it's the only thing on his mind as he's gripping his side, frantically trying to prevent too much blood from seeping out of his body.
He'll probably chastise himself later for not being more gentle or respectful, but he's lost too much blood to be thinking straight. With his free hand, he bangs on your window, praying that you're A) at home, and B) not listening to music. He's not too worried about the first one, he knows you never leave your lights on when you're away, but the second one, he's not too sure about.
He bangs, and bangs, and bangs on the glass, a loud, thunk thunk thunk thunk thunk that immediately rouses your from your sleep. You jump up from your spot on the couch, an open book falling from your lap as you dart into your room to grab the knife Jay gave you for protection, before returning to your living room, keeping your back to the wall.
You hold the blade in front of you, nervously gripping the hilt as you listen to the banging, making sure to stay just out of sight as you cautiously creep closer and closer to the noise. It isn't until the banging dies down that you finally get close enough to see the cause.
You gasp at the sight, dropping the knife and trying to tug the window open, before mentally yelling at yourself to unlock it. You drag the weakened behemoth of a man into your apartment, carefully placing his upper body on the floor in front of your window and removing his helmet. Your hand moves to his side, firmly pressing down on his wound, as you stare at him, mouth agape and eyes flooding with concern.
He laughs, a dry chuckle that just sounds like it hurts. "What took ya' doll?" You wanna smack him, but you can do that when he's not bleeding all over your hardwood floors. You tell him to wait, as if he could go anywhere in the state he's in, before rushing to grab the emergency kit he forced you to keep.
"Let-ngh- let me do it." He groans as he attempts to sit up, trying and failing to pull the tweezers from your hand. He doesn't even have the strength to sit back up when you gently push him back down. You clean his wound, all while he holds back winces and groans. You don't hold back, focusing on cutting and cleaning and stitching and wrapping, berating Jason for coming to you of all people.
"What d'ya mean? Of course I'd come to you?" Jason manages between harsh breaths. "Who else would I go to?" He seems genuinely confused, you're his girlfriend, you always come to him when you need help. Why wouldn't he come to you?
"Oh, I don't know, Jason, maybe Bruce, or Roy, or literally anyone else with training to handle this kind of thing!?" It comes out mean, but through his pain he can tell it's coming from a place of true care. You're worried. One of the strongest, most skilled people you know is bleeding out on your floor and you're panicking. Of course you are, you've never had to sew someone up, or dig a bullet out of someone, or try to hold down bile from the heavy smell of blood.
Your hands are shaking like crazy. This isn't a slight graze you can put a bandaid over and seal with a kiss, this is a life threatening wound on someone you care about, and all they've been doing since they came to you is make stupid fucking jokes and try to take things from your hands.
Jason can tell it's getting to you.
It should be the other way around, what with him bleeding out in your living room, but he quiets down, gripping your wrist with his non-blood covered hand. "Hey," He gently strokes your skin with his thumb, repeating himself when you don't move your eyes from his wound. "Hey, look at me Y/n." It's just stern enough to make you obey, without sounding like he's mad at you. "It'll be okay. I'm in good hands." Jason smiles at you, tired and reassuring. It calms your nerves just enough for you to finish sewing his wound shut.
You sit back when you're done, taking in your work once you wrap his stomach with gauze. Jason turns just enough to catch a glimpse, smiling up at you with his stupid, charming smirk. "Not bad, doll. Told ya you had it covered." He lays back, smiling up at you as he lays his head on his arm, the one on his non-injured side. Though he doesn't seem to bothered by the end of it all, you can't say the same.
He takes in your features, your tired, glossy eyes and your pouting lips. It makes his smile drop. You look away, your sad eyes not meeting his own. "I . . . what? What's wrong Y/n?" Jason winces, moving to rest on his elbows to get a better look at your face. "Was it the blood? Or the- was it the window? I'm sorry about that, by the way." You shake your head no at all of his suggestions, taking a breath before turning back to face him.
He can feel his heart hurt at the sight of unshed tears in your eyes. "I . . . I was scared Jay." He pushes himself all the way up when you take your lip into your mouth. He ignores the pain shooting through his side when he pulls you into his arms. "Hey, hey, hey, scared of what? I'm okay. You did good." Those tears finally spill when your arms wrap around his waist, loose as to not further irritate his wound.
"You could've died Jay, a-and I wouldn't be able to-to help you! I can't help you!" You sob into his shoulder. He holds you tightly, pressing his lips to your head as he rubs your back. "Please, please don't cry. I'm okay now, you helped me. I'm all better now." He rocks you both gently, trying to console you. "Sides, if I was gonna die, I'd be happy if it was with my girl."
What?
You freeze in his arms, and he knows he said something wrong. He just doesn't know what. His brain moves a mile a minute as he tries to figure out what it was before you get even more upset. Though, his brain completely shuts down when you stare up at him with those cute, confused eyes. The tears have slowed down, and he's at least thankful for that. "Your . . . girl?" Now he's confused too. "What-what do you mean by that?"
He has to do a double take. "What do you mean? You're my girl, like . . . girlfriend, you know?" Every second that passes only confuses the two of you more. "I'm your girlfriend?" "Ar-aren't you?" You blink at him. Were you? Are you? "Am I?" Somewhere there was cognitive dissonance, Jason just doesn't know for who. "Yeah, we're dating, I thought?" Though, he doesn't feel so confident about that now.
"Oh," You feel your ears grow warm, for the second time now your eyes don't meet his own. "I . . . I didn't know that." You wish you could hide right now, but he's still got his arms wrapped around you. "I mean, unless you don't want to, then-then I'm sorry-" Jason feels maybe even more embarrassed than you as he finally drops his arms, grabbing his helmet and moving to crawl back out the window he came in through. His bullet wound is completely forgotten by now.
He stops when you grip his jacket, shyly staring at the floor as you speak. "No! I w-want to." Your eyes darty up to his, before losing confidence and dropping back to the floor. "I want to be your girlfriend," It comes out a whisper, and when he's silent for a beat too long you worry he's suddenly changed his mind.
"Good. Great. Yeah." He drops back to the floor, sitting cross legged beside you. Internally, he's doing backflips in his mind. "Cool." Later on, he'll ask more questions, but for now, he's satisfied. "Yeah." You shyly play with your clothes, twiddling your thumbs as you sit in silence. You feel like a little girl who just admitted to her crush that she likes him. "Are you-" "I didn't-" You interrupt each other, both of you gesturing for the other to continue. It's a bit of a fight, but Jason makes you go first.
"I was gonna ask if you were hungry. I have some, um, pretzels and stuff. If you want." Jason nods. He follows you into your kitchen, where the two of you quietly and contently eat the iron rich foods you looked up. "What were you going to say, by the way?"
Jason looks up from his plate, the haphazardly prepared meal helping him feel better, though his heart feels pretty good right now anyways. "I didn't know that you didn't know. I thought," he laughs nervously. "I thought, we were dating this whole time." He laughs again when you shake your head. "I didn't know! I thought . . . I don't know, that I wasn't your type, or something."
That's probably the most surprising thing he's heard you say today. Okay it's not, but it's the thing that most catches him off guard.
"Of course you are! You're so sweet, and cute, and nice, and pretty, and you smell really good, and you're funny, and I like your voice, and the way you d-do things . . . and . . . other stuff." Jason stops himself before he can ramble for hours about every single things he loves about you. You wouldn't mind if he did, though. You hide your pleased expression with your hand.
"Me too." It's quiet, but no longer shy. "I like all that "stuff" about you too."
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fluff-n-cookies · 5 months ago
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Randomly off the bat Dabi, Shigaraki and Spinner (separately) With a quirkless girlfriend Who has an Ex that wants to get back with her, BUT……. The ex turns that “HE BROKE UP WITH HER” because she “had no quirk” and that she was “useless to him”
(Those are the quotes she says to them while telling them the short version of the story) Dabi, Shigaraki, Spinner, deals with the situation themselves.
(I love those boys😍 and I thought it be a good idea story for you, so go crazy and have fun with it😅)
Okay, girlie, while I love the fact that you're sharing this stuff with me, I don't think you read this. the yellow paragraph. I hope you send this request to some other writers, @honeybubblebeeeeee is one of my personal favs. I do however like the idea of a reader having no quirk and being abandoned because of it, so I'll put a platonic spin on it.
AND I ALSO DON"T WRITE FOR SPINNER SORRY!!!
Reader was abandoned by their family after being born to a quirk marriage meant to provide children with strong quirks only for their first child to have no quirk. not wanting their reputation destroyed they abandoned our dear reader at 5 leaving her in an orphanage and a note to near come find them less they wanted a bounty on their head. (reader is now 16)
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Dabi likes children, he likes how they have this innocent aura, he likes that they, hopefully, have not gone through the horrors he has. Hopefully. On the other hand, he hates quirk marriages, he hates hero's, in fact, I'd even say he hates fathers in general.
To tell Dabi that your relationship with your father or your mother is bad is to get them at the top of his hit list, VIP shit. Endeavor is just a couple seconds behind them.
but what hurts him more, what hurts him the most is if you actually believe them, if you push yourself through hand to hand combat, sniping, and other such practices not for the sake of improving yourself but to prove to them (not that they care) that you are not useless.
Oh how it pains him, to wake up in the dead of night to see your tear stricken face as you berate a poor punching bag to death on the roof. The wind is cool as you swing, and swing again. It's as if you dance for the stars of the night and the stars alone with not a thought for the trees or the mountains. Only ever the stars. 
The sting hurts, the impact of thinly wrapped fists against a leathery wall, but that anger that drains with it is enough to make the pain worth it, is it not?
That anger you feel, is an anger that Touya knows all too well. The type of anger that makes one want to yell of the heavens, yell that they are not a sinner despite being imprisoned in hell. He’ll watch as you swing with fury, fury of not being enough, fury of being thrown away like trash.
one man's trash is another's treasure though, right?
In that case, you're Touya's most darling treasure. Oh the urge to hold you close and tell you everything's going to be okay, as he pets your head, whispering promises of vengeance on your behalf. To give you a reason to smile.
Oh, it's strong.
Oh, the blood he's shed for you.
he won't say anything, if you see him get you water after you nearly faint from mental and physical exhaustion, no you didn't. if you saw him undo the bandages on your arms from training and replace them with new fresh ones, you're delusional. If you saw him stalking your family's socials and calling someone to leak their crimes, shhh, don't tell.
----
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"I mean, yeah, you kinda are."
Was his genuine first thought.
I mean, what do you want him to say? that your quirk doesn't determine your worth, like what?
and darling, when I say correct him, I mean correct him, please correct him. Please look dead into his eyes and say "I'm not useless!". for when I say it will escalate, trust me it will Escalate.
this boy has never had a true friend, and on top of that, he was teased as a child for, well being him. So the moment he gets a friend, his heart will swell, for once he feels cherished, and my poor boy, he doesn't show it correctly.
he's just so happy to finally have someone to talk to and joke around with, but doesn't realize just yet what is a joke and what is not. so he'll keep pushing it, it supposedly is an "inside joke" so he'll keep doing it.
So please correct him! tell him that it hurts, and tell him lightly to not risk breaking his heart.
Because he wants to make you happy, he can't stand the fact that you go quiet whenever he calls you quirkless, and that you're progressively distancing yourself more and more. And believe me when I say, it's painful for the both of you.
Please be his friend, and please let him make you happy correctly, you are just so perfect, we can't have such a perfect thing so sad now can we?
---
yeah, done admist some weird shit, and did I mention that I'm a horrible writer?
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astonmartinii · 2 years ago
Note
Heyy! Can I request more vettel insta AU? Honestly I have no preference for the reader I just enjoy reading vettel a lot because of how less we get to see it but I'm happy to discuss suggestions 🤩 hamilton y/n + roscoe, charle's sister anything really
family ties | sebastian vettel instagram au
pairing: sebastian vettel x leclerc!reader
seb may be retiring, but he's not gone from the paddock completely, though the reason is not exactly what you'd expect
ynleclercart
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liked by charles_leclerc, pierregasly and 110,067 others
tagged: sebastianvettel
ynleclercart: it's been a rollercoaster of a ride but i am beyond grateful to have been able to design helmets for such an icon of the sport. seb will always be missed on track, but if he ever wants to return, he knows where i am <3
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user49 noooo can people stop posting their goodbye posts for seb i'm still in denial
sebastianvettel no one else i'd rather work with, thank you for always supplying the beautiful lids
ynleclercart always - come visit soon
sebastianvettel i'll be there
user12 ^^ this is just digging the knife deeper PLS DON'T GO SEB
charles_leclerc what about your loving and devilishly good-looking brother?
ynleclercart eh, seb is better
user35 most iconic leclerc and it doesn't even come close
ynleclercpriv
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liked by charles_leclerc, sebastianvettel and 31 others
ynleclercpriv: sometimes babygirl is a fully grown man who hikes in his free time
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charles_leclerc tell him if he comes to monaco i'm shaving it
ynleclercpriv over my dead body charlie
charles_leclerc that can be arranged
sebastianvettel thank you for the compliment (?) my love, charles stop threatening her or i shall have to intervene
maxverstappen1 get his ass seb
ynleclercpriv max why are you involved in our family domestic?
maxverstappen1 idk seemed fun
sebastianvettel can we all go back to the original point of the post - admiring me?
f1gossipandtea
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liked by 2,130 others
f1gossipandtea: seb spotting!! anon sent me this picture of recently retired sebastian vettel in monaco of all places. why do we think he's there?
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user45 my king is looking so good, retirement unfortunately suits him
user10 my sebchal heart tells me that he was there to see charles but it's not likely :(
user09 no let's be delusional
user22 i saw a post that he was later seen with a woman??? a girlfriend mayhaps?
user49 pls no i can't take retirement and a girlfriend in a month
sebastianvettel added to their story
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[caption: had to commission the best in the business - thanks y/n]
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ynleclercpriv
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liked by sebastianvettel, pierregasly and 35 others
ynleclercpriv: goofing around in the wilderness
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sebastianvettel it's not goofing, we're serious hikers
ynleclercpriv sure we are and i'm also a professional boxer
maxverstappen1 y/n can you get seb to come back? it's a shit show here without him
charles_leclerc i agree with him for once
ynleclercpriv lmao they gagged ur ass @lewishamilton
charles_leclerc y/n i'm being serious !!!! he'll listen to you if you ask
sebastianvettel i can literally read all of this
maxverstappen1 so you'll come back?
sebastianvettel nope
sebastianvettel
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liked by ynleclercpriv, charles_leclerc and 702,088 others
sebastianvettel: vacation and all that jazz
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user78 seb using instagram like a normal person after retiring, my prayers were heard
charles_leclerc you're 1000% going to be a crunchy dad
sebastianvettel i don't know what that means but i don't think a person can be crunchy
charles_leclerc that's exactly what a crunchy dad would say
ynleclercpriv don't try and trick him with online terminology
user30 i love the domestics in this comment section i didn't know the leclercs and seb were that close
user40 call me a conspiracy theorist all you want but that's defo y/n leclerc
f1gossipgirl
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f1gossipgirl: another seb spotting, the german made a surprise appearance in melbourne... and in a ferrari jacket. our sources say that he was accompanied by a woman but he wasn't seen again other than his entrance. do we think seb will watch from ferrari? does he have a new job? does he have a girlfriend? what do you think?
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user10 omg he's so mysterious but like i need him to be straight up with me right now
user39 my brain: he's probably just there to support, my heart: seb for ferrari team principal
user88 omg imagine seb as team principal helping charles win a championship
user67 so someone commented on seb's post that he might be dating y/n leclerc (charles' sister, seb's old helmet designer and artist) and that would make sense that he'd accompany his gf to support her brother
user11 omg the thought of charles and seb being brother-in-laws
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ynleclercpriv
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liked by sebastianvettel, charles_leclerc and 35 others
ynleclercpriv: forgive me friends but i am so in love with this man
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charles_leclerc believe me we know
sebastianvettel i love you too honey 🍯
pierregasly where did you get the last photo... asking for a friend
ynleclercpriv it's from norbert - you snooze you lose pear
maxverstappen1 omg parents
charles_leclerc STOP
sebastianvettel i'm not sure we're your parents but yes you can come visit for christmas
charles_leclerc wait i thought we were coming this year
ynleclercpriv more than one family can come at a time - grow up charlie
sebastianvettel
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liked by ynleclercpriv, charles_leclerc and 1,023,566 others
sebastianvettel: doing melbourne right
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user45 sebastian... you don't know what a soft launch is
user13 he's an influencer now baby
charles_leclerc i thought social media was stupid ?
sebastianvettel let me appreciate the love of my life in peace
charles_leclerc okay romeo
user19 the last two posts + charles commenting on every post + seb being seen in the paddock IN A FERRARI JACKET = i'm losing my mind
redbullracing can't wait to see you tomorrow champ!
user48 they're fuming he's being seen with ferrari
f1
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liked by charles_leclerc, pierregasly and 772,303 others
tagged: scuderiaferrari, charles_leclerc & sebastianvettel
f1: a familiar face back in the ferrari garage! seb made his return to the scuderia in melbourne surrounded by former coworkers and the leclerc family.
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user48 AND THE LECLERC FAMILY ??? they know what they're doing f1 admin is a seb x y/n truther
liked by f1
charles_leclerc he loves me too much to stay away for too long
ynleclercpriv *us
user38 YALLLLLLLLLLL
user97 i need them to confirm it i love them so much
user21 the way y/n has commented - her account is priv but there's over 1,000 posts HOW MUCH OF IT IS SEB PLS GIVE US THE CONTENT
ynleclercpriv i don't kiss and tell xoxo
charles_leclerc
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liked by ynleclercpriv, sebastianvettel and 1,304,778 others
charles_leclerc: congratulations on officially joining the leclerc family seb!! thank you for putting up with me and i expect great birthday and christmas presents xx
view all 211,056 comments
sebastianvettel of course you spoiled this, i love you but you are an unfortunate by-product of my relationship with y/n
user23 CONFIRMATION
pierregasly CHARLES NO
danielricciardo CHARLES NO
landonorris CHARLES NO
maxverstappen1 CHARLES NO
ynleclercpriv YOU FUCKING MORON CHARLES I'M LOCKING YOU OUT
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sebastianvettel
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liked by charles_leclerc, ynleclercpriv and 2,134,677 others
sebastianvettel: happy engagement to the love of my life, your brother may have spoiled it, but i'm prepared to deal with his annoying ass if i get to be with you for the rest of my life. you make life worth living and i can't wait to explore the world with you x
view all 301,451 comments
user39 when will it happen for me god?
charles_leclerc I'M SORRY I LOVE YOU GUYS THOUGH
maxverstappen1 bagsy flower boy
danielricciardo pleasse let me plan the stag
aussiegrit congrats seb!!
christianhorner congratulations seb and y/n
ynleclercpriv i love you so so so much seb, i'm so glad i met you. you've changed my life and finally showed me what love truly means x
note: omg this post has posted so many times unfinished im gonna lsoe my mind
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immaturityofthomasastruc · 1 year ago
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#23: “The Miraculous Ladybug Movie May Give You What You Want, but My Show Gives You What You Actually Need! You Don’t Work in Television, so You Wouldn’t Understand.”
I've been running this blog for almost three years at this point, and I've seen Astruc talk trash about various things while claiming his show is better, like Winx Club, Paw Patrol, Pokemon, and Pixar as a whole. I never thought I'd see Astruc act like his show was better than a movie based on his show though.
For those who don't know (and you'd be forgiven, seeing how Astruc has barely talked about it on his Twitter), there was recently a movie that hit theaters based on Miraculous Ladybug called Ladybug & Cat Noir: The Movie. Supposedly, it's meant to be a retelling of how Marinette and Adrien met as civilians and as heroes. While I haven't seen it, it seems to be getting good reception, with some saying it's better than the show it's based on.
Of course, Astruc had something to say about this.
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Okay, I sort of get what he's trying to say here. It's hard to compare the experience of watching an hour and a half long movie and a TV show with five seasons under its belt, but at the same time, the way Astruc phrased it still made it seem like he was trying to say the show was the better option because it “gives you what you need”. Nobody was expecting the Love Square to be resolved in a few episodes. Most people at least wanted more stories about the two to be told that don't involve constant padding. Astruc also acts like the Love Square is the only draw for the series instead of, oh, I don't know, the superhero action? You're really telling me they couldn't have tried focusing more on that after resolving the Love Square? I'm just saying, if The Office can continue after Jim and Pam got together, you can at least try to actually write other stories after the Love Square becomes canon.
One user in particular had some things to say in response to Astruc's claims, and you can guess how well Astruc took that.
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Again, nobody is saying that working in television is all sunshine and rainbows, Astruc, but just because someone isn't familiar with dealing with network constraints and test audiences, it doesn't mean that they're unable to provide any meaningful criticism.
Also, Astruc is once again using a psychology term, in this case, the Dunning-Kruger Effect, to act like he's smarter than the critics. This man took psychology as an elective in college, didn't he?
But then again, this is coming from someone who doesn't think constructive criticism is a real thing.
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Funny how he once again acts like anything that isn't positive feedback of his show is delusional, isn't it?
Eventually, this devolved into Astruc posting a little tangent about how fandoms have only gotten more toxic, which would have been a decent point... it if didn't come after all the things he said about fans not being able to criticize his show.
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Again, there's nothing wrong with what he's trying to say here, but it feels less like a critique of how fans have become more toxic with the advent of the internet, and more like he's complaining about how mean people have been to him lately.
And, of course, this led to the usual fare of people calling out Astruc for his close mindedness, and Astruc once again saying how people aren't allowed to criticize his show in any way that isn't blind praise.
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And here's the thing. We're still not done yet. This little tangent only warranted more comments about how Astruc handles criticism, only this time, it's also about calling out the people who think they can do a better job handling the show.
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First, do you mind giving us an example of what kind of constraints you have to deal with, Astruc? We all know that TV executives suck, but I think we'd have more of a reason to understand your struggles if you actually explained some things that needed to be changed because of executive meddling.
Second, nobody wants a beach episode, Astruc, especially after that one issue of the comic you're choosing to ignore. We just want a more consistent story that doesn't rely on endlessly padding out the Love Square.
And finally, did you just say you have to be French if you want to rewrite Miraculous Ladybug? What does being French have to do with any of this? I remember seeing a little tweet a few years ago suggesting you would be a good choice to write a Superman story, but last time I checked, you aren't American.
Let's review in case you got lost. Someone tweeted that they thought the Miraculous Ladybug movie did a better job at the story it set out to tell than the Miraculous Ladybug TV show, Astruc tried to explain how his show is still good in its own way while justifying how long it's been going on for, he ranted and raved at fans for daring to criticize his team's writing before going on a tangent about how the internet has made people more hostile over the years, and when people still weren't happy with him, he claimed that you could only criticize or rewrite the show if you're an experienced French TV writer like him.
So just keep that in mind, fanfic writers. Unless you're French and have experience writing for television, you don't have a chance in hell to successfully write your own version of Miraculous Ladybug.
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hopeful-puffin · 3 months ago
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Been doing some rereading sporadically through the series again. And I noticed something interesting while perusing Season 3 in particular. Now this probably isn't anything groundbreaking or earth shattering. From what I can gather, I wouldn't be surprised it was entirely intentional as well.
Siren and Fizz are polar opposites.
I know, I know. Swallow your gasps of surprise and stow away those eye rolls. I realized it initially in the obvious differences between how they both view and treat Kappa. Where Siren is gentle, respectful, and worried about, Fizz is possessive, disrespectful, and invasive. Where Siren views Kappa as Kappa, an individual with his own wants, needs, and goals that is not defined by his undesirable title, Fizz only sees said title and what it means for his own benefit.
I could go on and on and on about this until I pass out from exhaustion, but it got me thinking. That can't be their only major difference, right?
Right?
The more I thought about it, the more I realized these two characters are on the opposite end of various spectrums. Case in point; being told "no," particularly from Kappa. When Siren is presented with even a hint of hesitation or discomfort, he immediately backs off with sincere apologies.
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He doesn't raise his voice. He even pulls his hands away until Kappa assures him it's okay. Siren maintains this show of respect by asking if he can hold Kappa rather than assuming the confirmation included stronger physical contact.
Fizz, on the other hand, repeatedly gets into Kappa’s bubble, only backing off when someone either makes him (Siren and Fean) or when Kappa flusters him. Despite being repeatedly told "no" to varying degrees, Fizz keeps doing it.
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Originally, I chalked this up to being socially unaware or just plain ignorant to social cues that aren't being screamed in his face. That he's just that dense. But then it kept happening.
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Don't think Kappa could be clearer short of stating he and Siren are dating. Oh wait. Didn't he already?
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Fizz kind of goes quiet at this and avoids it ever coming up again. Going so far as to look and sound disingenuously surprised and perhaps even disappointed when Kappa brings Siren with him to meet with the Flyfin in episode 146.
Which, as we all know, eventually culminates into Kappa telling Fizz off in a much more polite way than I would have been able to handle in this situation. Kudos to Kappa for that.
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Oh look. It's the consequences of my own actions. Weird how those keep cropping up at inopportune moments.
And it all came to a head in 165-167. In a display of violence I'm sure I'm not the only one who was surprised by.
Brutality aside, this next panel in particular I feel makes it clear how Fizz truly views Kappa.
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Where I had my doubts and concerns were quickly thrown out and confirmed respectively at this very moment. Fizz doesn't see Kappa as an individual. He sees the Beacon as a means to an end; something he can take his anger out on behind closed doors. Where Siren has respect and care, Fizz has possession and hostility.
But this isn't even the first blatant time:
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Kappa's value lies only in his title to Fizz. Nothing else should matter, in Fizz's mind, to the coveted Beacon. Honestly, I'm surprised Fizz even calls Kappa by his preferred name. He strikes me as the sort who would deadname a person repeatedly because that's not how he views that individual.
This brings up several more note-worthy differences between Siren and Fizz. Siren handles being told "no" with dignity and consideration for both himself and Kappa. Fizz, on the other hand, resorts to violence and self-righteousness. Hell, even being told "no" by Siren on defense of Kappa not being there to fulfill his dream sets the bastard off into a malicious tirade, all but telling Siren to off himself outright.
At first I thought there was no way Fizz was that damm dense. But, after 166-168, I've come to the conclusion that he really isn't. He's delusional, likely seeing himself as the hero in this story. That Kappa is merely a tool granted to him by God and Siren is just another antagonist getting in his way.
The fact that Fizz resorts to violence like that makes me worried and morbidly curious if he's that way with the other Flyfin, in particular his siblings. Is that why they stay back and let Fizz do whatever he wants? Like disassociating zombies before he unleashes on Kappa? Because he'll lash out on them if they say or do something? Finley, I believe. He is submissive on reflex, even with Siren. He even helps Kappa explain away his illiteracy. It's Fean where I'm unsure. She acts like she has some semblance of control over Fizz (smacking him in my previous example). Still, there is some love between the siblings. Otherwise they wouldn't have gotten so distraught when Siren nearly killed their brother.
But enough about that side-tangent.
Going back a little bit to comment I made earlier, Fizz likely sees himself as a hero trying to save both the Flynfin and the whales (I'm choosing to ignore that last panel in 169 until we get further details). A hero who is met with irritating barriers in the form of the Sluggi baring him from the archive/not wanting to wake the whales and Siren shielding Kappa from Fizz's delusions of grandeur both physically and verbally. Hence Kappa’s accusation that Fizz was trying to get him to push Siren away when he confronts the trio alone.
By contrast, Siren feels immeasurable guilt for not saving his people when he already knows the "cure" to their curse. He doesn't look at his reflection and see a hero worthy of praise and affection. Siren sees someone who is selfish simply for wanting to live despite his people and boyfriend encouraging him to stay alive. Someone who is surrounded by love and support he does not deserve.
I don't think Siren sees himself as a villan, but he certainly could stand to be less harsh himself. Easier said than done, I know. And I love that realism about him.
Both Siren and Fizz want to save their respective people. I don't doubt that. It's one of the only things they have in common. It's a difference of what they are willing to sacrifice in order to reach that lofty goal. Personally? I don't see Fizz as being willing to lay down his life for his own people either, which is rather ironic given his moral high ground shpeal with Siren I touched on earlier.
Last but not least is there willingness to actually be violent. Fizz clearly has zero qualms with it when nobody is around. Siren, on the other hand, seems almost averse to it, outright feeling awkward about using his knife (and even his teeth) initially.
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He seems to get over the aversion to use his teeth, but his feelings about his knife linger on.
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He is willing to cripple himself (in a way) in order to not make Kappa uncomfortable anymore. Despite it more or less being a heirloom of his father. Siren doesn't even reach for it when he knows Kappa is in danger. You could call this a slip of the mind due to his panic or being in a rush. I like to think knowing Kappa is afraid of it played into this decision as well. And Siren proves once and for all he's not above using his teeth anymore either!
Despite his protective rage, Siren is still shocked to realize how violent he's become.
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I didn't sign up for this psychological warfare, but damn if I'm not staying here for it!
Fizz, but contrast, while he has no weapons so to speak, is not above using his fists. Consciously battering someone weaker than him. All too happy to resort to torture even.
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This guy is sadistic enough to see that look on Kappa's face and be excited about the mental and physical pain he's about to inflict on his perceived prey. Thank the surface Kappa was able to draw his own blood, which is not a sentence I thought I would ever say.
Compare that to Siren as soon as he realized what Kappa was afraid of:
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There is no joy in Siren's eyes as he takes in Kappa’s look of fear. He wants to make things right, going so far as to stow his weapon out of sight before trying to approach Kappa again. When Kappa eventually flees, Siren respects the decision and does not follow despite everything in him screaming to give chase.
Long winded story short, I love the intentional differences between these two.
One last unrelated comparison before I hit the road (because I absolutely love finding these sprinkled throughout this amazing story):
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That despite being "imprisoned" by the other, they're both happy. That first panel, by the way, is still one of the most heartbreaking ones to me in the entire comic. Just the implications behind it all, fortified by the later treatment at the hands of Fizz, is just chef's kiss.
Also damn this 30 image limit! I had to remove a few panels, but I hope my point(s) still comes across.
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lover-of-mine · 1 year ago
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I'm gonna start this off by saying that this has been ping-ponging around my head like that old dvd screensaver, quicking around and getting more unhinged every time it hit a corner since April. And while this is a meta on the cemetery scene in Death and Taxes, I will be going back and forth in the whole show, so I don't know, buckle up, grab your delusional juice, and come with me if you feel like it.
First thing about that scene is that it tries to make you think about the equine therapy conversation in Dumb Luck.
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They are in a location we have never seen before and probably will never see again, the outfits are similar, and even the circumstances of the conversation could be read as close to each other, considering Eddie wasn't doing well after almost dying, Buck is definitely not handling his death well. I made a way too detailed meta about the cinematography of buddie during Eddie's breakdown era (you can read it if you want more details) but the main thing about the dumb luck conversation is that Eddie is finally letting Buck in after continuously shutting him down when he tried to offer help and that's reflected on the way they filmed the scene, the way they are talking, moving, positioned in the frame. It's about Buck reminding Eddie that there's hope after all. Considering the moment Buck's in, with them alluding to that conversation, you would've expected for them to do a similar thing with Buck, right? That this scene going to give Buck the same type of peace the equine therapy talk gave Eddie.
But it doesn't. One thing that's kind of a pattern with Buck, Eddie, and Eddie reassuring Buck (if you could call 2 scenes a pattern) is that they have Buck looking up at Eddie (I also talked about this in more detail here if you're interested) but that's interesting because of Buck's height, he's the tallest person in the room, so he's not usually looking up at people, but something about Buck as character is that he has the tendency to sit in higher places, so he's always higher, and he even picked a place where he can sleep in a high spot.
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But when he's getting reassurance from other people in his life, they are both usually sitting down, at the same eye level.
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But when he goes to Eddie for reassurance, Eddie is standing up and Buck is sitting down, so Buck is literally looking up at Eddie when he goes to Eddie for advice. And Eddie is always focused on Buck, in Home and Away, Eddie is reasoning with him, and in Recovery Eddie is trying to give Buck what Buck is asking while not pushing his boundaries.
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Why is that relevant here? Well, Buck spends the whole conversation in the cemetery trying to get Eddie to look at him and Eddie spends most of the conversation looking forward so he won't have to.
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And that alone is very interesting because Eddie is always looking at Buck. I could legit put 100 screenshots here to prove it. So the fact that Eddie can't look at Buck here, means something. Because Buck wants Eddie to be on his side, he needs Eddie to tell him he's doing the right thing, but the way he's talking is making Eddie shut down.
Buck wants answers, right? He wants the easy way out. He died, he has feelings about it he doesn't want to deal with, so he's looking for whatever answers he can get so he won't have to. But the way he's talking sounds a lot like the way Eddie talks to him in Kids Today when he drops Christopher off with him before the tsunami. Very you're alive, get over it thing Eddie had going that ended with him literally destroying everything he had. So, like, we know that's not the way to go about near-death experiences, it doesn't end well because the pressure has to go somewhere and let's face it, Buck has never dealt with anything that happened to him ever. He can't just keep moving past the shit he's been through, at some point, that's gonna catch up to him.
But the thing about the actual content of the conversation is the way that Eddie tries to do the thing he usually does, reason with Buck, "been down that road, don't recommend it" or "or you don't know her the way he does" or "now am I allowed to ask how you are", because it's how they work, but Buck shuts him down with the "I feel like she sees me, like she really sees me for who I am" because that threw Eddie off balance in their relationship, in their friendship really, considering they way they showed us buddie from in a flash to mixed feelings, Eddie is trying his best to be someone Buck relies on, the way we've seen him rely on Buck through his trauma recovery. And one thing we see Eddie constantly do is back away so he won't get hurt once things get too intense. He puts space between him and whatever is bothering him, he ran to LA to escape his parents' judgment (and to be closer to Shannon but his parents played a part there), he kept Shannon at arm's length through most of the time she was back in his life before she died, he kept pushing Buck away after the lawsuit, he pushes everyone away really before his PTSD took him down. Dude retreats from the fight if he's not sure and Buck throws him off balance. Because up until this moment, Eddie thinks he's helping, but we see him realize he was wrong and shut down in real time.
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He's still trying, but his thing now is agreeing with Buck. This gif has 11 seconds, black and white because I wanted the whole thing in one gif, but Buck is trying to get a reaction out of him, but Eddie already moved to a whatever you say buddy mode. AND EDDIE JUST WON'T LOOK AT BUCK.
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So Buck wants to know if he's doing the right thing, Eddie is agreeing with him not because he agrees with him but because now he thinks that whatever he's doing is not helping so putting distance between them will be what's best because Buck is getting what he needs somewhere else so he needs to minimize the damage to himself.
And the distance thing is something that stays until the end of the season, because during the first half of 6B, they are together the whole time, mixed feelings being obviously the biggest example, but they made a point of highlighting the fact that they were very close outside the firehouse, just to stop. They were chilling at Buck's loft, they were out and about scheming the fire captain, Buck looked more comfortable at Eddie's than he did in his own place. But then we don't even see them together in the hospital after the bridge. Like, there's s p a c e now.
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And I spent a really long time trying to figure out what was going on with this scene that made such an impression on me, and it's that Buck doesn't sound like someone who believes in what they're saying, he sounds like someone who's justifying themselves and hoping they are doing the right thing. And Eddie doesn't really let him get away with this line of thought, not usually, but he does now, so they leave that conversation with different impressions of how it went. Buck thinks he's right and Eddie is just backing the fuck off.
And a while back it downed on me what other scene this made me think of. And that's the fountain scene in merry ex-mas.
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They are even shot in a similar way, the off-center wide angle, the close-up from a side angle where you can see the other one slightly blurry, the focus of the conversation angled toward the front of the frame, everything happening in an outside location we will never probably see again, the way they are not looking at each other. And the conversation is similar too, I mean, sure they are not talking about dying but it is a big decision in Eddie's life that sounds like Eddie is justifying himself and needs Buck to agree with him. And Buck is agreeing with him, and not talking about it even though we KNOW he has opinions because he kept trying to talk about it with Chimney because Buck doesn't think it's his place to have an opinion and offer it to Eddie. Both scenes sound like they are talking and understanding each other but what the scene is showing us is that they are not.
And something about the way they are pretty much never looking at each other is that it is a way to show they are not seeing eye to eye in a situation, the most extreme example I can think of it is when Eddie drags Buck out of bed in Kids Today because they are pretty much never looking at each other there.
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But to have them face the same direction is a really easy way to make you feel like something is wrong, especially if they are not moving, because if they are standing in the same spot for 3 minutes they could've turned to face each other, but they don't, because the message here is that they are not really seeing each other. And that in a conversation where Buck is talking about being seen by someone else????? Like, come on, that's so on purpose.
I also wanna add a take that's not mine, all credit to @anxieteandbiscuits for putting this particular thought in my head with this post, that's basically about how the "dating someone you rescued? that never ends well" line might also be another justification for why Eddie chooses to stay quiet. Because one thing is true, and that is that buddie do be rescuing each other. And it really sounds like something Eddie would do, to justify to himself not doing something that could make him lose Buck any way he could, because romantic relationships are very unstable, no matter how much you want it to work, how much you love each other, there's a very real level of unpredictability in a romantic relationship that doesn't exist in their friendship. So to imagine him going "the friendship is good, the friendship is what I need, I won't do anything to change that because I don't have to and it probably wouldn't end well with our track record anyway" makes a lot of sense too.
If you made it to here, I love you <3
I have more metas here if you feel like reading more of my brand of insanity.
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welcometothejianghu · 10 months ago
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Welcome to another round of W2 Tells You What You Should See, where W2 (me) tries to sell you (you) on something you should be watching. Today's choice: 莲花楼/Mysterious Lotus Casebook
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Mysterious Lotus Casebook is a 2023 drama about a beautiful twunk who just wants to die of his chronic illness in peace, except that neither the dumbass purebred dog of a man who has decided they're best friends now nor the jock begging him for a rematch are going to let him go without a fight (in the latter's case, literally).
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Also they ride around in a magical bamboopunk RV.
I have referred to it elsewhere as "the CW presents: Nirvana in Fire," and I stand by that assessment. (I orginally called it Tiger Beat Nirvana in Fire, before realizing that Kids These Days will not get that reference. Shout out to the other elder millennials in the audience!)
There's been a lot of English-speaking fandom buzz about this show, to the point where if you're in these circles, I'm sure you've heard about it before. I know I had by the time I started watching -- which left me largely unprepared for the actual viewing experience, because the parts of the show that fans talk about are not a representative sample of the show itself.
This drama can be a good time. It's fun to watch. It has some hilarious beats and also some emotional moments. It spent its not-huge budget very smartly, and as such is generally quite lovely to look at. As my League of Nobleman rec will attest, I appreciate raw materials, and this is a show that has some fascinating raw materials.
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(Or some materials that need to get rawed, take your pick.) (Also, it's not my fault they didn't do a dramatically lit Fang Duobing shot so I could round out the trio here.)
You'll find some people out there who've gone real hard for this show, doing some deep analyses and getting really emotional over it. I don't want my gentle ribbing to give the impression that those silly fans are delusionally talking like the show's a five-star restaurant when it's really just a fast food joint. Not so! There's a reason it's captivated a whole lot of people! And in case you might be one of those, allow me to give you five reasons you should consider watching it.
1. This bitch
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The main character, Li Lianhua/Li Xiangyi is probably 50% of the show's appeal all by himself. He's fascinating. He's gender. He's fashion. He's been afflicted with a substance we called "bitch poison" the whole time we were watching. He has many emotions. He cries a lot. He coughs up blood every other episode. Cheng Yi is putting his whole lianhuassy into this performance, and it shows.
I made the Nirvana in Fire comparison earlier, and I stand by it for a lot of reasons, but the truth is that he's actually much more Opposite Day Mei Changsu: Li Lianhua wants all this stuff to fuck off and leave him alone forever. He is not seeking vengeance, nor does he particularly want to Do Schemes, but Circumstances keep dragging him back into the thick of all this nonsense he thought he left behind when he (mostly) died ten years ago.
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The thing is, he used to be a real dick back when he was a kid. And I mean a real dick. He was a dick to his chronically insecure adoptive older brother. He was a dick to his girlfriend with the personality of wet tissue paper. He was a dick to the handsome loser who liked his girlfriend. He was a dick to his followers. He was basically just a cocky little shithead who thought he was the best at everything -- and he actually was the best at everything, which just made it worse.
Li Xiangyi used to think everything (especially himself) was sooooo important, and now that life has massively kicked his ass, Li Lianhua had come around to the position that nothing is actually that important, so let's just all chill and grow vegetables. He doesn't want a rematch. He doesn't want to retake his rightful place as the head of anything. He just wants to pay his respects to the dead before he joins them.
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Now will everybody please just stop moving into his house.
2. goof-ass jianghu nonsense (affectionate)
As I mentioned earlier, everything I'd seen about the show on Tumblr had still left me absolutely unprepared for what a silly ride it is. Because it's silly. Hoo boy, is it silly. My wife dubbed it "lace front Phoenix Wright," just to give you a metric for how silly we're talking. Ace Detective Fang Duobing never cross-examined a parrot, but I feel he came close.
This show has some serious goof-ass jianghu nonsense -- you know, the sort of stuff that's impossible and ridiculous, except everybody’s going to treat it like it's just a normal part of existence. Here's a short and certainly inexhaustive list:
mind-controlling bugs
other bugs that control the mind-controlling bugs
ex-conjoined twins
a grown-ass man who can compress himself into bitchy third-grader
grave-robbing societies with secret brag language
so much nonconsensual qi-blocking performed by poking people in the boobs, that can't be safe, everybody wear thicker shirts
magical crossdressing powers
a bad guy who looks like this
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a princess who can get abducted and sex-trafficked and, like, nobody really notices? huh.
healing childhood paralysis by the power of believing in yourself
a ... hallucination pit? what was that, anyway?
so. many. mechanisms.
the equivalent of the "he's only mostly dead" business from the Princess Bride
a gradually lethal bookshelf
the strange amnesia everyone suffers from where a dude can cover maybe 30% of his face and render himself immediately unrecognizable to long-time friends and associates
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The thing is: I think this goof-ass jianghu nonsense is a legitimate selling point. I found it so fun. I turned off my need for show elements to obey little things like the laws of physics, and I had a good time. It can be a very funny drama, in part because it knows how silly a lot of its shit is, and it chooses to go full speed ahead with a sincere heart. If you are down for some shounen absurdity, you are in for a treat.
However:
2.2. goof-ass jianghu nonsense (derogatory)
I'm granting myself a sub-point here, because this is an important qualifier for the previous point.
I'm going to assume, based on what I've seen from fan responses, that many of the people who really like this show actually don't like the goof-ass jianghu nonsense. They are here for the BL vibes (after all, there are three cute boys who alll have some intense emotions about one another), and therefore downplay all the parts that aren't that. I want to make it clear that this is not a bad thing to do. There are many, many properties where I myself fixate on a single element and toss the rest into the sea. No judgment here.
However, since this is a post written to convine you to watch something, I want to make it clear what you're going to get if you dive in. If you're one of those people who skips scenes and/or entire episodes when your ship of choice isn't onscreen, you're probably going to be doing that a lot here. (I mean, I can't imagine doing this, but Tumblr has taught me that fandom is a rich tapestry.) The bones are good, but the connective tissue can be questionable.
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The main thing I wish I'd known before starting is that the mysteries are not the selling point. They are the celery that gets the cute boy peanut butter to your mouth. You, the viewer, absolutely cannot solve them; you're never given enough context or information to keep up with the detective lads, much less get ahead of them. Everyone does everything in the most convoluted way possible, to the point of comic absurdity. Finding out whodunnit is rarely that satisfying, because too often the culprit is Jianghu Steve, You Know, That Guy Over There With The Superpower The Characters All Know About But You'd Never Heard Of Before Thirty Seconds Ago.
The goof-ass jianghu nonsense feels like the place where the show I see fans talking about least lines up with the show that actually exists. And I think that's a shame, because I think the show that actually exists is actually a good time! It's just, you know ... silly.
3. Whenever Di Feisheng's not onscreen, all the other characters should be asking, 'Where's Di Feisheng?
This drama gets sold like it's the adventures of three guys together. (Hell, I kind of did it myself in the intro.) This is not the case. This is the tale of two guys who do most of the plot stuff near one another, and their occasional third, Di Feisheng.
This is a 40-episode series and I swear this guy's onscreen for maybe 15% of the time -- and for half of that, he's just off doing his own thing anyway. He disappears entirely for huge chunks of the series, which is a crime, because he is my absolute favorite.
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He is the rare grumpy himbo. He doesn't just have resting bitchface, he has bitchface for all occasions. He somehow has bitchface even during the rare moments he actually smiles. He's got a whole traumatic backstory, but the traumatic backstory is not the reason for the bitchface. He's Just Like That.
(Important to note that the actor himself only slightly has a resting bitchface. Xiao Shunyao can look normal and indeed quite pleasant. He has simply leaned into it real hard for this grouch.)
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The one -- one -- reason I can accept his being gone for so ding-dang much of the show is how often he re-emerges with perfect, hilarious timing. Thank goodness the show realizes how much comedic potential his character has, because his unexpected entrances are some of the best laugh-out-loud moments of the series. If the show had taken Di Feisheng as seriously as Di Feisheng takes himself, he would have been unbearable. As it is, he's an unmitigated delight.
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While you losers were being heterosexual, he studied the blade.
He makes the perfect foil for both Fang Duobing, who's the human equivalent of a puppy trying to gnaw an elephant to death, and Li Lianhua, who just wants to be excused from this narrative. Di Feisheng and Fang Duobing are basically two dogs fighting over their favorite toy, and their favorite toy is Li Lianhua, who really wishes he weren't. Some of the most compelling and fun moments of the series are when these three losers are all together.
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And these three losers are barely all together.
This show is Not Danmei. It's so Not Danmei that I had a tremendously difficult time while making this post finding either official images or screencaps with even two of them in frame at the same time, much less all three. It is, however, a Danmei Starter Kit. I mean, the tag on AO3 has, at present, 742 works in it (283 in English). That's just since July! There are years-old c-drama shows that have a fraction of that fan output! And I'm willing to bet a big reason why is how little the very intense boys with ridiculously compelling interpersonal dynamics actually interact onscreen.
But, I hear you asking, why would less of what the fans want equal more fan goo? Well, friends, that's exactly what the fan goo is for: filling in the blanks. And this here show has a lot of blanks. Look, I've made a very scientific diagram (that many people seem to agree with) about how this all works:
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The Hump of Compelling Mediocrity is the place where the amount of stuff worth thinking about far outpaces what the show actually contains of said stuff textually. It is the ideal location for imagination adventures.
Di Feisheng and Li Lianhua's relationship in particular lives right in the middle of that hump, what with the huge gaps in their backstory and all. They are a pair made entirely of unanswered questions. What the hell is going on there? What's their whole history, beyond the big fight? Why are they like this about one another? The show refuses to say. Whatever you imagine, you're correct. Now go tell AO3 about it.
interlude: God's perfect dipshit
I feel like I'm engaging in Fang Duobing erasure in the rest of this post, since he's not at the tip of any of the points I'm making, so I'm going to add a picture of him here, because I love him and want to pinch his perfect little cheeks.
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You know what I am shocked by? How the MLC/DMBJ reincarnation fics apparently have not taken hold yet. I give it another two months.
4. IT HAS A DOG
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FOX SPIRIT, MY SWEET BABY
'You mean the dog gets a whole selling point to himself' yes the dog gets a whole selling point to himself, because he is a very good dog and a very good boy (and his actor is a very good girl)
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Apparently he has a whole backstory in the novel that never gets included in the drama, including an explanation of why he's named "Fox Spirit," if you feel like going and reading up on that.
Sadly, Fox Spirit is in the show even less than Di Feisheng is, and that is a crime, because he could have solved all these silly human mysteries in thirty minutes flat, Wishbone-style.
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Dogs are so good.
5. One bad, bad girl
Do you like an unhinged villainess? Someone who's been sucking down Crazy Juice since beat one? Because oh boy, this show's got one of those for you.
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Jiao Liqiao wants two things: to rule the world, and to make Di Feisheng her pretty little housewife. And whomst among us does not understand these two impulses?
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She's not even the Big Bad! She's mostly just Di Feisheng's personal nightmare. She is the type of woman for whom the phrase "he's just not that into you" was coined. You've got everyone around her telling her, honey, I don't even think I've ever seen him look at a pair of breasts, while she's already planned their whole wedding menu and reserved the venue.
She has spent the last ten years of Di Feisheng's extended vacation making sure she's the one who's actually in charge, functioning as the point person for all the other evil schemes going on. Instead of handing over the reins upon her himbo boss' return, she's just going to keep doing what she's good at. As long as he keeps doing exactly what she wants him to do, she's gonna let him do it. If he gets out of line, well, there's always Plan B (the B stands for Breaking all of his tendons and making the world's surliest RealDoll).
I love the fact that she's so obviously evil, and he can't see it. To a certain point, it's not his fault -- everyone who serves under him is pretty obviously evil, so that doesn't make her special. But she's real evil even above and beyond that, and his dumb ass can't stop thinking about Li Lianhua long enough to notice any of the hundred or so knives she's aimed right at his back. He's so uninterested in her constant advances that he doesn't register how wanting to fuck someone and wanting to overthrow someone are not mutually exclusive desires.
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(Was I bothered throughout most of the series by how her lipstick should be a little more crimson and a little less coral? Yes, but I'm not going to hold it against her. She's busy doing evil stuff. She'll get over to the nearest Jianghu Sephora and restock one of these days.)
While the show occasionally sidelines or straight-up forgets about a lot of its supporting characters for several episodes at a time, it never forgets to check in on what Jiao Liqiao's up to. Claws out, hair done, she is at all times a constant glorious, scenery-chewing menace with excellent taste in terrible men. Absolute legend.
Bonus: These two sluts
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They don't get to be a full point because they're not nearly in the show enough, but just look at them. This is peak male character design. Slutty undone hair and slutty bare forearms, be still my bisexual heart.
Going to give it a try?
iQiyi's got you exclusively, baby.
Have I sounded a little defensive in this rec? Yeah, probably. It's just that I know there's a big and pretty intense fandom out there for this already, and I feel like a jerk coming in and being like "sure, it's fun!" when people are posting about how it made them cry for weeks. I want to be clear that that's not a bad reaction to have, while at the same time also being clear that that's not the reaction I had.
I might not even have written this rec, had I not been nudged to -- not because I don't think it's worth watching (I clearly do!), but because I don't know how much help it needs from the likes of me. There are plenty of other evangelists out there that'll give much more enthusiastic recommendations (like this one).
But the truth is that not every show has to be a heartbreaking work of staggering genius to everyone. I watched the show, and I liked it, and I had a normal time.
I also think there's something to the way I watched it, which was: one episode per day, schedule permitting, such that it took nearly two months for me to finish it. (And before you think I singled MLC out for this, this is actually how I watch most c-dramas.) I bet binging it is a way different experience, one where what rises more readily to the top is the tragic throughline of Li Lianhua's whole deal. If you're inclined to skip things not immediately germane to your points of interest, this is definitely the show to take at a solid run.
I actually paused in the middle of making this rec and made the one for the Blood of Youth, because the two invite comparisons: jianghu tales with chronically ill protagonists, some imperial bullshit going on, pretty boys with swords being weird about one another. Mysterious Lotus Casebook did not grab me as hard as the Blood of Youth, because MLC went for a more understated take on all its nonsense, instead of shooting completely over the top, which is how I prefer my nonsense (as the record will show). If you take your silliness with a subtler flavor, this could be the perfect thing for you.
Maybe you'll wind up being one of those people who gets their whole insides totally ripped out by this drama! But even if you don't, you're probably going to have a good time watching it anyway. And really, what more can you ask for from a show than that?
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Peace, nerds.
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suusoh · 1 month ago
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(repost because the og was bugging out ToT)
girlie are you are one of the top mommy johan fans rn and i am HERE for it!. Anyways have 13-ish paragraphs of me rambling why calling a man "mommy" is revolutionary and hot actually.
(tw: mommy kink, forced mother-daughter dynamics, infantilization-ish?)
the obvious ones of course being he does everything. I mean everything for you. Bathes you, brushes your hair, dresses you up by himself, hand-feeds you, etc. Will not let you do anything for yourself if he can help it. Even recreational activities, like watching TV or reading, he is finding a way to make it with his intervention such as holding the remote and he reading the book for you.
not an exact point where this stems from, but I have a small vision of Johan curiously played with one of his sister's baby dolls one time, or growing up with a mother and a sister (in some alternate universe where miss vera cerna got to raise the twins by herself), so maybe some of those things have passed onto him without him knowing.
You are his baby. that goes without saying. He'll call you baby from time to time, but not in a cutesy-couple petname way that one would imagine your average boyfriend would say it. He'd recite it like a healthcare nurse would. Won't be used as a common petname, it would come out when he feels especially a bit more motherly. other examples:
- clinical mutterings to himself ("baby needs to rest, they've been crying all day.") - maternal reflex and musings ("hm? no it's alright. baby doesn't need to worry about that, okay?") ("and why is my baby feeling sad today, hm? tell me.") - accidentally being condescending ("baby, you know that's not good for you.") - the last one is so weird to hear from him because the way he says baby isn't lighthearted or lover-y at all. it's so blank and emotionless. 💀
I think the tendencies are gradual. I love to headcanon that it starts out as your friend johan being a bit too doting at times. you even joke about it, groaning and calling him "mom" when he's being a bit too overbearing. Over time he becomes your boyfriend, one that coddles you a lot to an almost concerning degree (that's... normal right? people always fuss over their loved ones...). Next thing you know he's lulling you to sleep, conditioning you to to associate your sleepy time with his lullaby.
I don't think he's being fully delusional about it? He knows damn well that he's a grown man and you're a grown adult as well, unrelated with each other, and you guys are nowhere near any semblance of a mother-daughter. But that doesn't mean he won't impose the dynamic on you anyway. Thinks it's beneficial enough for both of you: he gets to care for you and you get to be taken care of. It works so well that it might as well be your permanent dynamic. (Or so he says. You crying and feeling yourself slowly lose a major part of yourself tied with your autonomy is just a natural part of sudden "changes".).
So he won't infantilize you to the point of actually getting baby stuff for you lol. he just wants to be your mother <3 and mothering also includes maybe discussing some topics over tea to see what your beloved daughter has learned today and seeing what you made today; a new painting? a new crochet project? making another science diorama? tell him. tell mom what you're proud of these days <3
WOULLDDDD wear the blonde wig maybe at times. Not that he associates long hair with motherhood. but it's just a thing he tries from time to time. maybe he's trying to emulate his mom to get more in-tuned with motherhood? Norman bates style? hot.
has a set schedule for you. reading time, feeding time, daylight time, etc. Though he can be flexible, your bedtime and eating time is a non-negotiable. you need your sleep and your food. Though I think he'd love it if you can't think for yourself and depend on him for everything, I think he'd still try to enrich your brain. So there's a time of day for mind exercise and studying: Reading together, watching documentaries, little games and puzzles to bond over like a good mother-daughter <3
speaking of food: endless spoiling duh. I think he'll even love it when you gain a few pounds from how well he's feeding you. it's another sign that he's taking care of you well. From takeout, to cooking for you, to filling he pantry full and giving you a snack every hour or so; he is stuffing you until you're full and sleepy. Will never let you go hungry. ever.
nsfw:
maybe.... maybe makes u latch onto his nips. breastfeeding and all that. hehe. will train you to start sucking on his nipples as a habit for you to calm down. Lets you suckle on his tongue as well if it'll help you go calm down <33 it's his substitute to a baby bottle. it's mortifying to you when you're sad and upset then you suddenly get the tingling on your tongue to just... orally fixate on something. it means it's working.
WOULD absolutely research how to induce lactation in men lol <3
loves loves loves using making you cum over and over again to leave you dazed, soft, and unable to be feisty. I think sex will definitely become a means to fix you whenever you become a bit too... "fussy" for his liking. Makes you cum over and over again until you're crying and pleading for no more, until you're passing out and unable to move your legs. He decides how many orgasms is enough already or if you need another round. And from what he sees? baby needs another leg-shaking orgasm from how cranky they were this morning.
overstimulation his beloved <3 thoroughly believes that sex is a form of taking care of you and making you feel good. and why wouldn't he want his baby to feel anything but good?
WILL fuck to sleep every night. sees it as the best way to get you to have the best sleep over (aka: you passing out to the point you might even wake up in the late afternoon). Vibrators are his best friend.
cockwarming. cockwarming. cockwarming. aaaaaaand- cockwarming. all while he's cradling you into his neck. will playfully rock his hips into you from time to time to enjoy the feeling of you squeezing around him for more. further proving you're always craving for his care.
~ that's all i got so far hehehehheeh hope u enjoy!
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schizosupport · 5 months ago
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Hello! I have a weird relationship to psychosis and I'm not sure if you might have any insight. I think I've had psychotic experiences my whole life, but the experiences I've had don't seem to fit into any named framework I can find (schizospec, etc.). I call it spicy anxiety, because on top of my existing anxiety I also am very prone to fairly brief (hours to days) bizarre delusions with insight. As a kid that would mean reading a fantasy book and being convinced that I had whatever magic powers I read about. As an adult it's more like... What if the car behind me in traffic is a robot-dragon trying to eat me?!?! And I can tell this is Not A Thing, logically, but I also can't stop panicking about it. I tend to be pretty paranoid in general, even when I'm not actively psychotic. Sometimes it's sorta fun, just like Imagination+, now with maybe more suspension of disbelief than is good for me! I have no negative symptoms, only some cognitive symptoms and those are better explained by my AuDHD than anything, I think. I don't think I'm schizospec; my delusions are too brief even for something like Brief Psychotic Disorder, and I think too bizarre for something like Delusional Disorder. I don't care that much about diagnosis, nor am I seeking a diagnosis, but I do want... I guess reassurance that other people experience this in similar ways? And language to describe what I experience? I also know that I have a family history of this type of mental illness (completely untreated) that seems to get worse with age, and if my symptoms ever become debilitating enough that I do need help...I deeply deeply distrust the carceral nature of the psychiatric institution, and I want to have knowledge of my own going in. To be clear: I am not asking you to diagnose me. I am asking if you (or your followers) have ever heard of experiences like this. Thanks for your time, either way!
Hi there! Yes, boy, I sure have!
So the "spicy anxiety" is something that I relate to a lot. I call it "psychosis flavored anxiety", personally. For me it's obviously not my only symptom, but it's something that is a fundamental part of me and also my own way of being schizo spec.
I used to think of this as just anxiety. I remember my gf's face when I first got into specific about the types of things I'm anxious about. They got kinda quiet and was like "honey are you sure that's anxiety" 😂 .... And it IS a type of anxiety, right, because it's a what-if scenario that scares you, rather than something you're convinced of, like a delusion. But it's definitely psychosis-flavored.
More clinical terms could be paranoid ideation, magical thinking and quasipsychosis, depending on your mileage.
I'm also someone who, aside from direct symptoms of schizophrenia, also just has an overactive imagination. Imagination+ is one way to describe it! My brain will come up with all kinds of bizarre and paranoid thoughts all the time. And depending on how well I'm doing I can dismiss it, I can be anxious about, or I can have a breakdown and feel temporarily convinced of it. There's often a grey area where I do act to protect myself from perceived threat, but I also acknowledge that it's an unlikely threat. But "just in case"..
Tendency towards psychosis or adjacent experiences does run in families, so having family members with psychosis means you are more likely to be having this type of experience - and it doesn't have to mean, that you're going to go on to develop fullblown psychosis.
I hope this was helpful!
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cruyuu · 3 months ago
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I love that theory! I like to think yuji and Sukuna will coexist like Angel and Hana! Maybe yuji will become a fire fighter and summon Sukuna to help him from time to time
I unironically think the only way sukuna can be saved is if he loses.
Sorry for a late answer anon. My answer got lengthier considering 268.
Angel/Hana and Yuta/Rika coexist. If they can, why can't Sukuna/Yuuji? Especially considering now that we know killing one is killing the other, that they share practically everything and that– despite not being able to share memories (which is alright because to Yuuji people exist outside of that)– it still works for them.
They are an anomaly when it comes to what we know. Despite being polar opposites, literally "hating" each other, Yuuji and Sukuna had coexisted quite successfully. Unlike Hana/Angel, they do not worry nor warn each other over anything yet they still survive, and unlike Yuta/Rika, even if separated, they are still able to use each other's techniques (Sukuna can still go through other people's memories and talk with them which we know is Yuuji's thing and Yuuji can use Dismantle and is practically like Sukuna– his soul, and by extension Sukuna's, dwells in his fingers.)
They're still tied to each other totally and Yuuji had reached great heights despite the narrative telling us (with Maki/Mai) that twins never do so, unless one of them dies. Also, the whole Gojo and Geto thing, too. Basically opposites are meant to kill each other, never to coexist. Either one must live or they should both die. That is a curse. If Yuuji is to be the breaker of that, then he shouldn't kill off or consume Sukuna (because that would be literally Sukuna's route all over again), but instead coexist with him.
Also, Sukuna disappearing goes against Yuuji's own words. If humans aren't good or bad, and if Sukuna and Yuuji do not represent 'bad versus good', then them dying together, or one living instead of the other, falls flat. jjk never followed what is right or wrong so... Sukuna choosing to live might be a possibility. (Also... considering these two are technically tied together and that death of one is death of the other... maybe Sukuna is still alive.)
And– I almost forgot to mention– Kenjaku and Takaba died together. Considering we didn't get the dying together end with the main villain but rather a second villain, and the fact that these two are forced to coexist via a soul bond (basically), that again gives me hope that Sukuna isn't really, truly dead and that they might actually start anew right now, and not in another life.
The fact that Yuta/Rika's bond was shaken and that his fate is up to chance leaves a lot to imagination, however. As you know, Yuta's a direct parallel of Yuuji whose story got told before his (while Rika, as the Queen of Curses, parallels Sukuna, the King of Curses). He chose to embrace Rika, told us their love was pure, only for him to end up abandoning her in favor of wearing Gojo's body. That panel of her crying over him means that she didn't even realize that Yuta was in Gojo's body, and that because of that (Yuta not wearing the ring which is proof of their love and their coexistence), she believes that he truly died.
I believe what might happen (don't be surprised if it doesn't) is that Sukuna might get reincarnated into Rika, and by extension, wake up in Yuta's body. Call me crazy and delusional but it's a strong possibility. I know the majority will not like this (Yuta fans pls do not start) but it's there and it would be such a Gege thing to do.
Keep in mind that the finger Rika swallowed is apparently Yuuji's own but that could always turn out to be a lie. Still, a more probable explanation is the fact that Yuuji and Sukuna are technically one and the same and hence hurting Yuuji's soul equals to hurting Sukuna's own. By extension, if Yuuji is carrying but a tiny piece of Sukuna within him (the residual in his hands which instead of disappearing might've been eaten by Yuuji wink wink) , it would still be enough for him to awaken in his finger and overpower a curse.
Now, there's also the fact that Sukuna cannot reincarnate (via his finger) into cursed spirits. Rika, however, is no longer a cursed spirit, but merely a curse which Yuta embraces via putting the ring on his finger. The ending of jjk 0 had Gojo explaining that and we also get Yuta and human Rika parting ways.
So! Rika is left without Yuta's connection, Yuta is trapped in Gojo's body (or is just dead) while his own remains an empty husk, and Rika swallowed Yuuji's finger. Sukuna is dead. Or is he? Big plot twist! Sukuna reincarnates via Rika directly into Yuta's body.
If this ends up being true I'm going to laugh lmfao but it's the only open possibility outside of them dying right now and reincarnating later on (plus might be why the cheeky "whats going on with Yuta?" comment is there).
That song one anon pointed out to me (called Why Haven't I Fallen In Love Before?) has these lyrics:
Yes, to compensate for the time I wasn't in love Lately I've been doubly excited After all, it's such a happy love story This is no time for watching TV drama I should have realized sooner That romance is going to be the protagonist My heart is racing, fluttering, pounding…
The music video of this song got shot in the same place where Sukuna's finger is located at so we can assume that it is, by placement, his song.
If you check out the lyrics, it lowkey fits this ending lol. If anything, it's so sappy and romantic that it's making me tear up lmfao. And yes! It is the reversal of the ending of jjk 0, where Yuta parted ways with Rika and stayed with what remained of her, not her (which is literally 268), only to continue living with her as a curse. That's technically the curse/vessel situation Yuuji had with Sukuna.
The way Yuuji's parting words read like a proposal (just like Rika proposed to Yuta) isn't lost to little old me.
Considering they had always been specialz, sukuita could easily own this approach. Considering Yuuji's rather strange words to Sukuna (that he- a curse- is, in fact, a human) and is the one asking Sukuna to live (paralleling Rika) and he got his own body (unlike Rika), it is more than fitting for Sukuna to get his own as a human. It's basically a whole inversion of everything because real love conquers all, doesn't it? It never dies. It has no ending.
Yuuji is the main protagonist but Yuta was considered a main protagonist before Yuuji so it fits that. Also, Sukuna's cleverness could shine again here, with the way he swiftly avoided death via his parallel (the Queen of Curses) and reincarnated into Yuta (effectively ending up in the same spot that Yuuji is now). Two main protagonists. Yuuji is no longer a side character and neither will Sukuna be. They'd be more than just a vessel/curse and wouldn't just repeat history. Instead of hate, they'd be awfully in love. Surviving despite the odds and breaking the cycle.
I should have realized sooner That romance is going to be the protagonist
That is to say: Setting an example and giving real meaning to Yuta's own (wrongfully put) "This is pure love." (because you embrace someone no matter what and if it was pure love, Rika wouldn't part ways with him, would she?)
Ofc Gege could debunk this entire thing. There are 3 chapters till the end after all. Maybe they'll simply let Yuuji consume what remains of Sukuna and let them RIP together.
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abyssal-werewolf · 10 months ago
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I tried to tag the commenter but the blog doesn't show up, so I can't. TW: this post does contain what could be interpreted as reality checking and although I don't mean any harm, this could potentially be triggering!
But anyway, this requieres a longer answer - I'm gonna give them the benefit of the doubt and just assume they just don't know better, which is fine, we're all here to learn. So please don't read an attack into this! I also do not experience delusions myself and certaimly don't want to speak over those who do. I am doing my best to be respectful and not accidentally spread misinformation, but if I mess up, please let me know!
Firstly, "delusion" is not a bad word. a delusion isn't "somethign stupid someone believes in, what the fuck is wromg with them", it's a (symptom of) a serious mental illness, often seen in schizophrenia and psychosis. it's an unshakable belief that contradicts Reality (= in this post, Reality with a capital R refers to the reality that is generally shared by all people and can be seen and experinced by everyone - aside from those who may have delusions). "touching grass" won't do anything to help that, it is reality for them and absolutely nothing and nobody can change that. at worst, telling them they're wrong and should just "touch grass" will make them suffer even more.
so, yes, you could say that all p-shifters experince delusions, because nobody but them can see their transformations. at least, there hasn't been any proof at all until today and their beliefs absolutely clash with science and Reality. but here's the thing: there is a condition called clinical lycanthropy or clinical zoanthropy, which describes exactly the experience of believing you can, have turned or will turn into an animal. there are quite a few of them here on tumblr, having their own community which also often kinda overlaps with alterhuman spaces. those people are not p-shifters! p-shifter is not a medical term or anything, instead it is a term that has evolved here on the internet and has a history of cult-like behaviour, lots of manipulation, malicious people, etc. the "original" p-shifters also oftentimes had a lot of ableistic opinions, openly shitting on clinical zoanthropes, using delusional as an insult, etc. the term p-shifter was never ever meant to describe the experience of clinical zoanthropy. it was invented to create the feeling of belonging to an elite group, to put yourself over others. it's even questionable if the majority of p-shifters actually believes they could transform or if they just wanted power over others, promising them to teach them how to turn, knowing all to well it can't work.
nowadays, some clinical zoanthropes try to "reclaim" the term p-shifter - which is a problem, because you can't just take a term that was NEVER meant to describe your experinces and also never used as a slur against you. a different example in alterhuman context would e the word kinnie - originally made by trolls and to shit on otherkin, it always directly addressed otherkin, even if in a deregatory way. it was meant to be used for otherkin. p-shifter was never meant to be used for delusional people. p-shifter will always have its ties to manipulation and cults, it will always be a harmful term.
I don't and will never allow people who call themselves p-shifters on my blog, because of the terms roots.
there is nothing wrong with truly believing you can transforn into an animal, even tho it contrdicts Reality. there is absolutely nothing wrong with being delusional (as in, it doesn't make you a bad person, of course it almost always comes with suffering). there however IS something wrong with proudly using a term that was NEVER meant for you, never described your experiences and instead has a history of manipulation and online-cults. if you proudly call yourself p-shifter and just basically decide to ignore that history, I don't trust you.
THIS is what my post was about, not about the fact that some people are delusional.
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