#So basically I'm trying to keep myself calm and confident by telling myself it would be sooooo embarrassing for them to lose me

[amtrak12]

.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Am I (27m) the asshole for wanting my boyfriend (28m) to be attracted to me?

This involves sex as a topic but won't get explicit, I'll keep it vague. I'm asexual. Completely sex repulsed in a physical sense, mostly due to autistic sensory issues. I've never had any interest in sex and didn't have any libido at all before going on testosterone, so the way most allosexuals tend to view and think of sex is something I've always struggled to understand.

In previous relationships, my asexuality was handled in different ways depending on the person. One boyfriend was totally fine just not having a sexual aspect to our relationship, another one had a hookup he got my approval on. The compromise me and my last boyfriend came up with was that he'd text me his fantasies about me and that did a lot for him without me having to physically be in the situation, and even if I didn't get anything sexual out of it I did enjoy it. It was a confidence boost. I dont generally consider myself attractive or desirable, i wear sweaters in summer because im so self conscious, and this compromise actually did a lot to help me see myself in a different light.

I recently got into a new relationship and, as with every relationship I've been in, there's inevitably a discussion about how we're going to compromise on this issue. My new boyfriend didn't know anything about asexuality and barely understood when I explained but he's very insistent about not crossing my boundaries, which I appreciate. But the problem is, since he'd never considered sexuality from a less direct angle, he didn't really know where to even start with ideas when we were trying to work out a compromise. So, I started making suggestions, thinking back to what worked for other people I'd dated. Just abstaining wasn't going to be doable for him so I didn't suggest it, and he wouldn't be comfortable with a hookup.

I remembered my ex used to be able to get something out of telling me about his fantasies so I asked if that was something he'd be into. I wasn't angling to try to get him to agree to something, I genuinely just wanted to know whether or not that was an option to consider. He didn't actually answer at first, he went quiet and then he answered the question with another question and asked "wouldn't something like that make you uncomfortable?" And I said "no, because the physical component is the thing I have issues with, not the subject matter itself. So long as I don't have to directly engage in the situation, I'm golden."

I don't know if this is something that was really stupid of me to say and my autistic ass just didn't realize, but since he's so careful about my boundaries and comfort and tends to fret, I thought his problem in the moment was worry that I'd be making myself uncomfortable in an attempt to meet his needs. So I hurried to reassure him and said not only would it not make me uncomfortable, I'd enjoy it in a way. Not sexually, but I enjoy knowing that my partner is attracted to me. It makes me feel good about myself.

He got really upset. He doesn’t get upset easily and hadn't ever gotten properly upset with me before (at least not to this extent) so I was very taken aback, but I was floored by his reason for being upset. Not word for word, but he essentially said "so basically you want me to frustrate myself to feed your ego?"

I was, I think understandably, completely fucking appalled by such a suggestion. I said of course not, I was just suggesting something I knew worked for someone else because even if it wasn't his thing, we could narrow down options by process of elimination. Which made logical sense, to me. He wasn't calmed though, he started saying things like "so, you want your partner to be attracted to you even though you never plan on actually letting them act on that attraction? Do you see how cruel that is?" And... I don’t know, which is why I'm submitting this here. Is that cruel?

From my perspective, I would think it's only natural to want to know your partner finds you attractive, doesn't everyone want to be wanted to some degree? I don't get some sort of sadistic thrill out of it as he seemed to be implying, and I don't want it to impact my partners in a negative way. If this was something he would find frustrating then no, of course I wouldn't want him to frustrate himself, we could look at other options. When I made the suggestion, I figured the worst that would happen was he'd say no and we'd narrow down the list of options. I never imagined my moral character would be called into question.

He's usually so, so nice to me and it hit really hard for someone who’s usually so fond of me to say I sounded selfish and vain. Both actual words he used when this devolved into an argument. I explained my reasoning for suggesting it to begin with but he said the issue isn’t the suggestion, it's that he thinks that it's fucked up of me to want my partner to be attracted to me when I'm not going to indulge that attraction and it makes him wonder if I'm really a different, worse person deep down and he's only now getting to see it. He called it a red flag. That seemed like such a leap to me but I don't want to dismiss the suggestion out of hand. Many bad people think they're good people, so it's not out of the question.

This was our first real argument, previous disagreements had been talked out very calmly but emotions ran high with this one. I dont know if this is something that triggered him for deeper reasons, considering his reaction was so intensely out of the norm for him, or if the whole thing just looks entirely different from the perspective of someone who isn't sex repulsed.

Am I the asshole here? Is it really as fucked up as he says that I enjoy knowing my partner is attracted to me even though I won't agree to have sex with them?

We didn't discuss the topic any more that night, and it hasn't been brought up since. He hasn't been treating me differently than before, but he's always proactively apologized before when he was in the wrong about things and he hasn't this time, so to me that says he still stands by what he said. His words have stuck with me and they’re eating at me. I feel like such a horrible person, and I have no idea if I should feel more or less guilty about this.

Tl;dr: my boyfriend is upset that I like knowing my partners are attracted to me even though I don't want to and don't intend to have sex with them bc he thinks that's majorly fucked up and a red flag.

What are these acronyms?

[pure-garbage]

Nosy Friends? Nami's Incorrect Assumptions

"Nami!"

Usopp demanded the navigator's attention, but she didn't look away from the task of watering her tangerine trees.

"Nami, you're not gonna believe what I just saw!"

"A flying sea king?"

"No! Although if you can believe it, I did see one of those once, actually," Usopp admitted. "The thing I just saw now is way more believable than that, though!"

"Did Luffy eat something ridiculous again?"

"Less commonplace than that."

"I could keep guessing all day, Usopp," Nami sighed. "Just tell me."

"Okay, brace yourself... I saw Zoro kiss Lana!"

"Huh? He did not," Nami scoffed. "You must have been mistaken."

"Definitely not! And If I'm being totally honest, I feel like this development has been a long time coming. I mean those two have been like, basically attached at the hip since we visited the sky island."

"I don't buy it," Nami said, narrowing her eyes. "Zoro at least is definitely a homosexual. Maybe Lana too."

"Oh, she's homosexual alright," Usopp snickered. "Very much attracted to men. If you don't believe me, you don't have to take my word for it. Go ask them about it."

"Thanks, but I'll pass," Nami said with a roll of her eyes. "I'm sure you saw them come close, what with all the wrestling those two do..."

"Hey! I know what I saw!" Usopp fumed, offended by Nami's blatant disregard for what he considered to be riveting news.

Nami ignored him and went back to her daily routine. Later, she passed by Zoro and Lana napping on deck. They sprawled in opposite directions, heads close. Their arms crossed, each shading the other's eyes from the sun.

'Cute, but definitely gay,' Nami thought.

It had been fairly obvious to her from the start of her acquaintanceship with Zoro that he wasn't straight. He wore earrings, never showed interest in women, and even the way he stood had a certain flair that to Nami's practiced eye was a dead giveaway. His relationship with Lana, if anything, had only made Nami more convicted in her assessment. Only a gay man would be comfortable exercising in such close quarters with a female crewmate, and with so little clothing no less.

Admittedly, Nami was less certain about Lana, but if she wasn't gay, the woman certainly had an admirable amount of self-control. Even Nami occasionally found herself at risk of drooling if she let herself watch Zoro's daily workouts. Although at close range, the smell was certainly enough of a turn-off that it was possible Lana was actually straight, and just not completely nose-blind.

The evening wore on and the fickle seas of the grand line remained mercifully calm. Something strange caught Nami's eye while she recorded axis measurements.

Zoro and Lana entered the washroom together and didn't come back out right away.

Interest piqued, Nami recalled Usopp's claim.

"No way," she scoffed. "I have to see this for myself. I won't believe it until I see it."

She tested the door handle.

'Not locked! Ooh, I wonder if I'm making a mistake... I might be about to see something I don't want to...'

Despite her apprehensions, Nami's curiosity got the best of her. She flung the door open with a scowl.

"What in the- Oh."

Zoro and Lana froze, staring at Nami with blank, innocent expressions. Zoro was shirtless on a stool, a towel draped over his shoulders. Lana stood behind him, carefully trimming his hair with a pair of scissors.

"Oh, hey Nami," Lana said in greeting. "Need to use it? We can come back later."

Nami chuckled in relief and shook her head.

"No, my bad. As you were."

'So gay,' she thought. 'Usopp was definitely mistaken.'

At dinner, Zoro and Sanji went through their usual routine of hostility while Nami beckoned Usopp, prompting him to lean in close.

"Now, if you told me you saw Zoro try to kiss Sanji, that I would believe," she muttered smugly.

"Nami, I'm telling you, you've got this whole thing all wrong," Usopp tsked confidently. "You'll see. They'll do it again, I'm sure of it."

"Fat chance."

Across the table, Lana snapped.

"Will you two knock it off?!" she roared, grabbing the cook and the swordsman by an ear each and putting them an arm span apart while they yelped and grumbled. "I AM TRYING TO EAT!"

"Super. Gay," Nami murmured to Usopp. He only shook his head stubbornly in response.

That night, Nami stayed up late compiling the days data into her logbook. A scuffling on deck drew her interest. Zoro and Lana were the only ones not in the cabin.

'It's late... those two don't usually spar after night fall. I wonder if everything's alright out there.'

Nami poked her head out of the cabin, bringing an oil lamp with her. Dark clouds obscured the moon's light, but she could still clearly make out Lana and Zoro. He leaned over the rail of the Merry, and Lana in turn bent over his back with her chin resting on his shoulder and her hands deep in her pockets. Nami couldn't make out what they were saying, but Lana's giggle rang out like chimes over the sleepy ship, soft and bright. She nudged Zoro's earrings with the tip of her nose, tinkling them playfully.

'Huh. This... actually doesn't look all that gay.'

As if to put the final nail in the coffin of Nami's long-held impressions, Zoro turned casually and pressed his lips tenderly to Lana's.

"Hey! What the hell's the big idea?!" Nami demanded, stomping out of the cabin.

"Hey Nami," Lana greeted her, nonchalant. Neither she nor Zoro moved from their pose. "Couldn't sleep?"

Nami shook with rage and disbelief. She leveled an accusatory finger at them, mostly Zoro.

"I thought you didn't like girls!" she cried in outrage.

"Huh? Who, me?" he asked, puzzled. "I never said that."

"Then why do you always act that way?!" Nami seethed.

"What way?" Zoro frowned, dumbfounded.

"So damn fruity!"

"Fruity?! How?! I don't act fruity!" Zoro protested.

"Actually, you kind of do," Lana broke in. "I thought you were gay when we first met."

"Huh? You did?"

"Yep. At one point I was convinced you had a big crush on Sanji," Lana grinned, causing Zoro to sulk.

"You're just saying that to be mean," he grumbled.

"So you're telling me you've really been straight this whole time?!" Nami fumed.

"Yeah, of course. Duh."

"I don't get it, Nami," Lana frowned. "Why would you be so upset over Zoro's sexuality?"

"Because! I've changed in the same room as this man dozens of times assuming he wouldn't even spare me a glance!" Nami raged, red as a boiled lobster, wrath rolling off her in steaming waves.

"I never did!" Zoro scowled.

"Oh yeah right!"

"Look, your wrong assumptions aren't my fault, so take your slights somewhere else. Anyway, I'm not a peeping Tom, unlike a certain pervy cook I could mention."

"Lana! Back me up! I'm not overreacting, am I?!"

"Hey, leave me out of this!" Lana said defensively.

"I demand restitution!" Nami stormed.

"Forget it! I didn't do anything wrong! Come on, Lana, help me out here!"

"You two settle this yourselves!" Lana backed away, hands in the air. "I'm going to bed! Have fun!"

She left them bickering on deck with a snicker. Inside, Usopp was busy listening intently.

"The drama," he cackled softly. "Nami really hates being wrong, huh?"

"Who doesn't? Go to bed, Usopp," Lana sighed.

___________________________________________

<== Previous Chapter

Next Chapter ==>

== First Chapter ==

[essaytime]

i have been Summoned with warrior cats. for the uhhh character asks, maybe tawnypelt or leafpool whichever one you’d prefer (i haven’t read the books in a hot minute so,,)

(also yes i am Ash!!!)

To be honest, I also have not read it in a while:)

For Tawnypelt - I don't remember her that well and she was never a character I thought a lot about, but one similarity I can notice is that we both tend to not confide in people, though for different reasons. I'm much more extroverted, and actually I do wish I could tell someone about a great part of what concerns me, but what usually holds me back is the perspective of living with the consequences of telling that. Not that I fear they'd tell someone, they probably wouldn't, but just the silent judgement would be unbearable to me. With Tawnypelt, I feel it's just her personality that is more reserved - and maybe the effects of her childhood, which I can't relate to, as my (not yet finished) childhood is quite happy. Another thing - I like when everything is clear and in its place, it causes a great deal of stress and confusion for me when I'm not sure what happened/is happening, or what I'm supposed to do, which is less of a Tawnypelt reaction, she's more calm and collected, but she definitely likes order. I also often claim something hurts less than it actually does so as to not cause problems, like she did with the rat bite. However, she is much more straightforward, and assertive; I can be stubborn when I want to, but usually I crumble under the pressure of others at the end.

Leafpool is actually (along with Dovewing) one of the Warrior Cats characters I relate to a great deal. I am also compassionate and idealistic, which can lead to me worrying too much about other people or becoming very emotional and unhappy when my ideals are violated. She is also (which I appreciate, because it is a cause of great anxiety for me) quite similar to me in terms of how she deals with romantic love: she's so sympathetic towards Crowfeather, no matter what he does, but also so quick to judge him when he does something that bothers her. And the scene where she's helping Morningflower is basically a masterpiece. The awkwardness of that! The feeling of being judged! I feel that, Leafpool, I feel that. It will bring me great comfort and a sense of being understood in case I have to pass my crush in a doorway while carrying papers once again. She is lot more patient than me, though. I appear patient, but the truth is I am often angry and sometimes terribly angry, I just try to keep it bottled up. I fear what will happen if I snap one time. As a teenager, I can't really understand the motherly side of hers, so I won't speak about it, but I'm much worse with children. I also don't have such a great relationship with my sibling as she does, but I have a younger brother, so that is obvious. To be fair, I wouldn't want a twin sister. A sister - maybe, but younger. I know it might be a bit selfish, but I think I just need too much space and talking and thoughts for myself to constantly spend time with another girl my age. I needed to be the one person my age in the family.

[emotionalsupportgoblin420]

So first, lemme introduce you to my f/o of the week: Tfa Bumblebee

(Also, I will be rping as my Shisa s/i)

Me.

He would start with playing a song that is calming and that I like. Music always calms me down. Once I've settled down a bit, he'd hug me and just sit there till I was okay and playing calming music.

No. He doesn't wear clothes period lol /nm /silly

Him. He's also the one who needs protection more often as my yokai powers keep me well protected. Even against decepticons.

Low light, a candle, some snacks, maybe some hot coco for me, and some warmed up motor oil for him if it's the cold months, some blankets, a plushy for me, and anime while we're all cuddled up.

He would beg me not to leave, and I would have to to protect him.

Yessir! We're two nerodivergent dumbasses ofc we would lol /lh

I'm the only one who gets sick, and it's constant comfort, pity, and cuddles, which my touch starved ass LOVES.

Obvi we can't have bio children but he's not entirely against it. But preferably WAY in the future when we're both more mature lol.

Probably to somewhere like an amusement park. (Fun fact: In the canon, Bumblebee has gone to an amusement park. Whether or not his 16 foot tall robot ass was or was not allowed on any ride remains unknown, but imagining him on a roller coaster is fun as hell to me.)

We both kinda do. Him more than me, but we can always tell when the other is upset.

Not often, but it does happen. Usually over something petty ngl. It usually goes down like this: yelling, petty insults, storming off, coming back to talk about it calmly, apologizing, and forgiveness. Works for us. Neither of us are ones to linger on things long.

Me. I have made it my life's mission to torment him lol (in a loving way ofc. I try not to take things too far and to apologize when I do).

Both of us match each other's energy level, and we both have a love for speed. He sees me as a "goddess" (his words, not mine), and I am deeply insecure, and he helps with that while he's very confident (downright full of himself in a fun way.) The problem arise when you realize we both have ADHD. I'm innatentive, and he's hyperactive. That makes for an interesting combo to say the least lol. Also, he's a yapper and sometimes, I just wanna be left alone. This has led to a few petty arguments.

Yep. We both do. I always have to kiss him if either of us is leaving.

Omg yes. Sometimes, he won't shut up. But, I knew what I was signing up for, so I can't complain too much, lol.

Me. I'm the flirt in the relationship, and I wear it like a badge of honor.

Me! I LOVE animals! I already have a hamster and a crow (the crow is my familiar). If I could, I'd have horses, dogs, cats, cows, goats, ducks, and millipedes. I do have to restrain myself a little but will get some of those one day lol.

I'm aight with it most of the time. He loves it. He loves people knowing I'm his.

Pika Girl by S3RL

Bee would, and I'd help Ratchet patch him up.

The song Bumblebee always reminds me of him (for obvious reasons). Fire reminds him of me (because of my dark flame magic).

Either one of us, really. I could do it by being flirty (and possibly explicit 😏). He gives me his puppy eyes, and I am not leaving, lol.

Neither of us ngl. I'm too ticklish, and he wouldn't feel shit if I tried.

Video games! I don't care much for playing, but I love watching. Especially Legend of Zelda games.

Mine's alcohol. His is video games.

Him. He's such a toddler when he's drunk (I think it's kinda cute ngl. Also, according to G1, cybertronians can get drunk /nm /gen)

We like the basics. Babe, honey, sweetie, sweetheart, the usually. Babe is the most common one between the two of us.

Him. I freak out a bit. I hate the sensation.

If he could choose my outfit, he'd probably choose my yellow plaid dress and white leggings (assuming it's for a night out. If we're staying home, he'd pick some sort of laundering)

Oh, we're both handsy. But he can be more explict with it. If he can do it discreetly, he'll try to squeeze my thigh (not to say I mind ofc).

Me! I like to tell SCP stories! Unfortunately, I'm dyslexic so I often stumble over my words lol.

Me again. I love to forage for edible mushrooms, and I make mean fried mushroom nuggets if I do say so myself. He tried to cook once and nearly burned down the whole base. Optimus banned him from ever doing that again so... yeah.

We both make dirty jokes, but when it comes to stories that make the other blush, I'm the reigning champ.

Me. I draw all the time and make jewelry as well.

I'm most likely to fire up the stove at ungodly hours because I'm hungry. He keeps me company, which I appreciate.

Me. I cuss like a sailor (and I'm not happy about it).

He's the one always wanting to try something new. I'm a bit vanilla ngl. I just don't think of some of the things he does.

Me. He'd be against for like 10 minutes before caving to the cuteness and helping me beg Optimus to let us keep it lol.

Neither of us ngl. He doesn't eat, and I'm a lightweight when it comes to food portions.

Me as a joke lol.

He likes sunny and I like rainy.

Either of us. Without hesitation.

I would, and he'd join. The most likely song to create such a situation is Classic by MKTO.

Yes we both can.

Hell yeah 100%. We match each other's freak lol.

No. Both of us are chronic oversharers.

Him. He's literally a car lol.

Him more than me. If I don't give him enough attention, he starts begging like a dog. He knows what to do for my affection.

Me ngl. Nothing too bad. Just something little like hiding the game he was playing or something like that.

For me, it's happy stims, hugs, and nuzzling my face into him while I hug him. For him, it's some kind of gesture, like taking me on a nature or something.

California vacay and checking out cool stores and universal.

Any swimming is skinny dipping for him. I wouldn't, tho. I hate feeling that exposed outside of the comfort of either of our rooms.

He is. I physically couldn't carry him, lol. Not to mention, I usually fall asleep while cuddling or during a drive.

He doesn't get it, but he's willing to stargaze for me.

I usually will just spread my legs while we're alone, and he jumps at the opportunity. He'll just gently brush his hand against my bits, and I'm good to go.

I'm serious with grocery shopping, and he throws random stuff into the cart.

Me ngl.

I'm top dommy mommy. He's bottom twink.

He does.

Ask for OTPs and Self Ships

copied from a now gone post and blog: original url https://glitter-and-gasoline-deactivate.tumblr.com/post/687208822931095552

TW: angst, suggestive content, etc.

Who would end a heated argument by defending their actions with ‘because I love you!’ ?

What would they do if the other woke in a manic state after a nightmare?

Do they wear the other’s clothes? (sweatshirt, bandana, necklace, etc.)

Which one is more protective? Who needs to be ‘protected’?

Describe their cozy night in.

Who would beg the other not to leave? Who has to leave to protect the other?

Would they build a pillow fort together just because?

What happens if one of them gets sick?

What are their thoughts on having children?

Describe their first date.

Do either try to hide their emotions if upset? Can the other still tell?

Do they have many heated arguments? How do they smooth things over?

Who’s the bigger tease?

How do their personalities compliment each other? How do they clash?

Do they always say ‘i love you’ before leaving?

Can they stay up all night just talking?

Who’s more likely to pull the other in by the waist and kiss them passionately?

How likely are they to have fur babies? How many and what kind?

How do they feel about PDA?

Choose one song that perfectly describes their relationship.

Who would get into a fight to defend the other’s honor? Who tends to the other’s wounds?

What reminds each of their partner?

Who’s more likely to convince the other to stay in bed come morning?

Who’s more likely to give the other a massage?

Do they have any hobbies they share?

What are their vices?

Who is the light weight that needs to be taken care of after a party?

What are there thoughts on pet names? Do they have any?

Who is more likely to jump in an elevator? Who freaks out?

Your OTP gets to pick out each other’s outfits; what is each wearing?

Can they sit side by side without touching the other or are they handsy? (lacing fingers, touching knees, etc.)

Who’s the better story teller?

Who’s the better cook?

Who’s more likely to tell a dirty joke or story to make the other blush?

Who’s more artistic?

Who’s more likely to fire up the stove at 2am because the other woke up in the middle of the night hungry?

Which is more likely to swear?

Who is more sexually experimental? Who’s more vanilla?

Who would rescue an injured animal and nurse it back to health? What would the other think?

Who has an insatiable appetite? And what does the other do to help?

Which one would take their jacket it off and drape over the other one because they were visibly shivering?

What’s their favorite type of weather to enjoy together? (getting snowed in together, watching thunderstorms, etc.)

Who would give their life for the other without a second thought?

Who would dance in the kitchen making dinner? Would the other join in or watch from the doorway?

Can they fall asleep without the other?

Would they get frisky at the movies by themselves?

Does either of them have a secret that could potentially ruin their relationship?

Who’s the better driver?

Does either of them have a hard time being away from the other?

who’s more likely to do something out of spite?

What’s a non verbal way they say I love you?

Describe their weekend getaway?

Would they ever go skinny dipping?

Who’s more likely to carry the other to bed?

Do they like watching clouds or star gazing?

What do they do turn the other on/put them in the mood?

Whose the serious one when grocery shopping and who likes to toss random things in the cart?

Who’s more likely to hold a grudge after an argument?

Who tops? Who bottoms?

Who pulls the other closer when they’re sleeping?

[sourcandycigs]

Life Update 2024

Hi world. Or nobody. Probably nobody.

So I have a long term partner now, we'll call him Zayne. I've never loved somebody like this and its so beautiful but so painful at the same time. Basically my life was on track and great until the week after my birthday last year in December.

I've lost a ton of confidence and have been so anxious and paranoid I've been throwing up on and off and I just wanna feel how I used to.

I'm trying to find reasons for it and the one that worries me the most is that it's my relationship and I need to break up with my partner. But I do NOT ever wanna do that. Ever. He's my whole world and I've never loved somebody so deeply.

I'm just filled with doubt at the moment and anxiety. I used to feel so calm and happy in my life but now I feel like I'm sinking into this deep pit and just want to wake up normal again.

Honestly if I didn't want this relationship to be the ONE for life I wouldn't be getting this worried or sick thinking about it.

He's so beautiful.

Let me tell you a bit about him instead of focusing on all this negative shit I've got going on in my head one sec.

He's so funny, like he has my humour and can always make me smile even when I'm in tears. He's so weird, and goofy and just such a fucking loon.

He's so fit aswell, you have no idea. He's literally stunning. Gorgeous eyes, toned muscles and a lovely little perky bum.

He's a passionate lover, I've never had sex like it in my life which upsets me at the moment because my sex drive is WAY down because of my anxiety at the moment and I wanna get comfortable again and start enjoying my relationship again.

I feel like I'm messing this up, I haven't felt this way in ages. Last time I had a wobble like this was when me and my ex had broken up and I was stressed about finding somewhere new to live and where my life was going.

I think that's what this is again, the panic about my life and I'm just pinning it on my relationship because I'm trying to find answers and because my relationship is the most important thing in my life that's the thing that if I think about it being the issue bothers me so much.

It's just nasty thoughts that normally would just pass but because I'm not as confident and I'm anxious anyway they are really bothering and I'm looking WAY too far into them.

This is the man I want children with, the man I want to marry. No takebacks this time. I will work through this and come out the otherside stronger and happier than before, (he's also being so supportive and understanding through all of this I don't know where I'd be without him).

I'm putting so much pressure on myself and my feelings. We moved in together to a flat and at first I loved it and settled in well over time but ever since this December wobble I've found the flat a really daunting place to be because that was where I was at when these anxious feelings started. I just feel so isolated and alone in my own thoughts at the moment and wanna just snap out of it.

I also have been doing my first serious job and that is probably adding to the anxiety, I felt alright before but again ever since this December wobble going to work has been hard because all I can think about is my anxiety!

My dad has really bad mental health issues and I'm worried I've inherited it lol, he is so anxious he dry heaves and throws up and I'm trying to not let myself get that bad again.

Zayne says all I can do is carry on going and not expect to feel like myself all in one day, and I know he's right. I just gotta keep going and eventually I know I'll get back to a good place, tbf it has only been a month or so since this all started. I think I'm also getting a bit depressed by it aswell.

Oh well, we move. I love him more than anything in the whole world. At least that I'm sure of. There's NOBODY else I'd rather be with and that's not bullshit. I know that in my soul.

I can do this, I can get through this, though it may suck a lot. I will come back onto my blog in a few months time and hopefully feel more like myself and be more on track.

Until then, I've got great support from my friends and family and honestly I consider Zayne and his family my family now more than my own. I miss living with his parents and do really wanna move back but know I can't run away from adult life forever and will just have to adjust. I think I was just very distracted when I first moved into the flat and it made the move and the intensity of it all not even register so when it all finally hit me it caused a mini life crisis/breakdown.

I'm already on the mend though I know it, I was MUCH worse so that's a win in my book. Just gotta focus on eating and taking care of myself and crying when I need to cry.

Well that was a mouthful lol, what an update. But to look on the brightside I have my life set now, a man that's gonna be a husband and a father and a family and set of friends who are gonna be there every step of the way. Now to re-settle and start enjoying it again and stop overthinking.

Easier said than done but all I can do is try.

I'll end this with a letter to myself:

Hi Em,

I know right now your mind is probably running wild but breathe.

You aren't alone, you don't need to feel trapped or panicked.

You can feel anxious, you can overthink. It's what you do and that's okay. But remember the end goal here. The family and the home with you and Zayne's kids. Bringing up a family together.

This is a bump in the road and if you are willing to crumble at the first big bump you'll never get any stronger.

Don't get mad for not feeling 100% straight away, it will take time and it's a process. One day you might feel just like yourself again and then the next 3 days suck. Try and enjoy yourself, your friends and your lover.

Life is just getting serious now. And this isn't the time to drop and run, it's the time to knuckle down and buckle in.

I love you Em, you are so cool and funny and kind and honest. But stop scaring yourself and don't think because you feel calm you're just pretending to because something's always wrong ffs.

Love you Em. We'll get through this.

You can't act like a teenager forever x

[mouthpiece-simp]

Bellringer x Prethinker Headcanons

Hooray I'm finally back to writing HCs! I kept having to delay coming back to these further and further because life kept happening. Now I can finally write my own dang request to myself... lol.

🔔🧠These two were unlikely friends for a while, and both of them realized they'd grown feelings for each other.

🔔🧠Brian would've just kept it to himself or gone into full panic mode trying to decide how to confess, but not Ben. He made the first move and was like, REALLY flirty throughout the entire confession.

🔔🧠Brian is SPEECHLESS... and very red. He tried to get himself to say some kind of nonsense about how intellectuals didn't let emotions sway them, but it came out as, "Uh... Ben, um... myself... uh... I... m-must be malfunctioning... I-"

🔔🧠Poor guy was so embarrassed that Ben had to help him calm down to actually articulate a response. And no, he wasn't malfunctioning.

🔔🧠After an uncomfortably long silence, Brian finally sheepishly admits that he likes Ben too.

🔔🧠And that's how they started dating...

🔔🧠Ben LOVES to pick up his boyfriend. It makes Brian get really embarrassed every time, but he actually really enjoys it.

🔔🧠He's also really flirty all the time because he thinks it's fun to embarrass Brian.

🔔🧠Brian will want Ben to be as happy as possible, so he will make entire spreadsheets, forumulas, ETC. trying to calculate and take note of the best things to say or do in every possible scenario he can think of. Ben keeps trying to tell him to just be himself and not try to impress him, but it doesn't seem to get through to him yet.

🔔🧠Ben's healing bell not only heals Cog HP, but it also has a calming effect on Cogs. He will use that to his advantage if Brian starts getting too stressed and anxious {which is often}.

🔔🧠When he's overhealed from Ben, Brian gets pretty overconfident in his ability to fight toons. This confidence can be easily shattered if one of the toons asks him why he's overhealed because he won't want to admit he got help from another Cog- especially to the toons!

🔔🧠Both of them are really good at cooking, but they absolutely CANNOT be in the kitchen together. Ben is more about "cooking with passion makes it taste better" while Brian is incredibly particular and scientific about his cooking. Also, Brian will point out every single health code violation that Ben made {even if it's as minor as hot holding food for 5 minutes at 160°F when it's about to go on the table at room temperature anyways}.

🔔🧠So they take turns cooking meals while the other does the dishes since it was the best compromise they could come to.

🔔🧠Surprisingly, Brian actually sometimes calls Ben pet names. Usually it's half sarcastically, but he does do it occasionally. By the way, most of the time the pet name is honey.

🔔🧠Instead of asking for help, if he needs to reach the top shelf he basically tries to do the typical standing on his tippy toes, jumping up and down, getting a stepping stool, or just outright climbing to get the thing he wants. If Ben notices this happening, he'll get the thing and tell him to just ask him for help next time {he won't}.

🔔🧠Ben will gossip about anyone and everyone, and Brian likes to listen to all of it. But he also likes to secretly get "equal revenge" on anyone Ben doesn't like, ranging from breaking into their house to replace all the batteries with dead/almost dead ones to just straight up doing whatever they did to Ben back to them.

🔔🧠Once he catches wind of this, he'll ask Brian to stop because it is hurtful even if it's funny. So instead they end up becoming that couple that gossips about EVERYBODY and just judge from a distance. Since talking poorly of people behind their backs is definitely not hurtful!

🔔🧠Ben is now really into [insert video game you think Brian would play here] because Brian forced him to play it.

🔔🧠Basically imagine an anxious nerd dating a really flirty guy who doesn't ever shut up and that's their relationship dynamic LOL.

[dustofthedailylife]

hiiii, congrats on 1k!! again

my name is holly, as you may or may not know, and i sure hope you already have somewhat of a sense for my personality because oh boy do i suck at describing myself, but i´ll try anyway <3

i´m rather introverted and very shy until you get to know me better, then you´ll see a whole other side of me

sassy and sarcastic are my native languages but most of the time i keep my quips to myself because again...shy (but i love making others laugh with them)

i´m a perfectionist to the point where i´ll get extremely upset/angry with myself when something doesn´t go as planned; it also causes me to procrastinate a lot (look, if i don´t start, it can´t not be perfect)

my friends called me a pessimist quite a lot but i´d argue i´m more of a realist; anyhow, i try to hide all of that under a more calm, good-natured exterior

as for my hobbies, i obviously like writing, reading and gaming but i also enjoy drawing (especially tattoo-style pieces), learning foreign languages and doing sports (mainly tennis and dancing)

i listen to music during basically everything i do (headphones are a must!!)

in a relationship, i´d look for someone honest who i can trust and who i feel comfortable enough with to not hide who i am (bonus points if he makes me laugh)

self-confidence? hardly know her

^the insecurities from that (i.e. difficulties trusting people and their intentions, constantly comparing myself to others, need for validation, etc) are what i consider my ugliest side; but now that i´ve realised where the root of the problem is, i´m working on improving myself

i cannot stand people who are blatantly ignorant/ choose to be a jerk (to put it nicely) and completely disregard others´ feelings and interests don´t get me started on racists, misogynists and all the other nasty bunch

also, please, common sense is supposed to be common; you have a brain most likely, use it!!

zodiac sign: cancer

mbti: infj

that should be enough, right? i´m looking forward to seeing who you think my ideal match is <3

Holly, my love! Thanks for participating! Well then, let me see what my scryglass says...

Your Perfect Match is...

Shikanoin Heizou

Now listen! I was originally gonna go with Childe but then I remembered you're already married sooo, it would've been too obvious.

Anyway! You met Heizou the first time when he was investigating a case and accidentally rang on your door instead of that of his suspect. Little did you know you'd become a target of his "investigation" nonetheless.

Not criminal of course, but he just couldn't get you out of his head so he looked for excuses to ring your doorbell again. Lucky for him you lived in an area where he often had to go to investigate.

Eventually he couldn't keep making up excuses for standing in front of your door anymore so he asked you if you had any interest to go out for a cup of coffee with him.

And hooo boy, if he thought he'd fallen hard for you already he would soon realize he was so wrong. The moment you started warming up to him and started showing your sarcastic and sassy side he was head over heels for you.

You could match his wit with ease and let me tell you he is swooning!

He is also someone who reassures you a lot and manages to make you see the good things in yourself and the things you do or help you find the things you can improve on (not yourself though, you're literal perfection in his eyes!). He is simply the perfect counterbalance to perfectionism!

Oh and you can bet he makes you laugh frequently. His quirky and sarcastic personality compliments yours perfectly. Sneaky teases or playful jabs here and there thrown at each other is your daily bread and butter.

Common sense? His trademark. Can't have your head screwed on backwards as a detective after all!

Bonus: Loves snaking his arm around you when you sleep. He definitely is the big spoon in the relationship.

"Hey, uhm... no, I'm not here for an investigation, this time at least. Uhm, actually I've wanted to ask if you would like to go out with me sometime?"

[honey-milk-depresso]

okay I had a little brainrot and I didn't know who to share it with because I'm not confident enough to post it on my own blog so I hope I'm not annoying you or your followers by sending you this-

it's basically about the reader's fav boy being able to see them through the mirror of his room, a little angsty if you squint but the major tw would be about me having no idea about how english works...

-

He was the first one to see you as you really were. And how beautiful you were… a sight he longed to keep all for himself, as he wished those brilliant eyes that followed his movements through the mirror of his room would only stare at him. You were… radiant. Full of life. Your presence was soothing, your voice calming when you mumbled to yourself. You made that little avatar of yours, that little persona that claimed to be lost in their world, look so dull.

He didn’t care that you lied; you were all but lost, you seemed to know things about him and everyone else that nobody knew! All he cared about was your love, the tender way you would look at him, and the smile that lighted up your face whenever he would tell you the silliest little thing.

That until he figured out those silly little things weren’t at all what he wanted to say. He craved for the occasion to confess his feelings towards you, and you only; not that little thief that wore your face and borrowed your voice, but was incapable of showing him all the love you held for him in your heart. But he soon figured out that he could never bring himself to say those words he rehearsed so many times in his head. Every time he opened his mouth in your presence those same, identical, sets of words would come out without him acknowledging what he said. And yet, you didn’t seem to mind, your smile would never falter despite hearing every day those same pre-made sentences that he kept repeating like a broken record.

Did you not notice? No, you sure knew that he was repeating himself. You were clever, observant, and knew so many things… there was no way you didn’t notice. But does that mean you knew? Did you know how much effort he was wasting into trying to talk to the real you? Those were questions you never answered.

Some days, he kept quiet. He listened to you as you told him about some silly little thing, confessed him secrets that you swore to keep or vented about problems of your life that you wished could disappear, and let you be comforted by those pre-set strings of words that always seemed to do the trick. Some other days your laugh would be just too lovely to the ear, or your cries too heart-breaking for him to stay silent, and he would struggle all he could to tell you those words that died in his mouth before he could even start. And some days you wouldn’t show up at all, and all he could have was that little, dull shadow of you, too silent, too numb to even get close to how you made him feel. He would gently caress its familiar frame, trying to feel in it the same warmth that you surely had, yet all his fingers would meet would be the cold silhouette of something that only resembled you in its appearance. In those dead days, he would stare at his mirror, hoping to see that figure he slowly fell in love with, wondering about a day where he would finally get to be with you.

-

hope you like it and sorry if I'm being annoying-

I kept this for myself for awhile ehehe

0////0

[sleepyboiscafe]

[Hi, hope you're doing well!]

How does Techno deal with being the cashier? I have anxiety, so I'm figuring it can be a little bit overwhelming to deal with people for so long. Or, how does Techno deal with long days? Does he get distracted by doing other stuff while no one is around? Or does he just let the time pass by?

Hi Anon, thanks for the ask! I'm also doing really well, thank you for asking! :D

Wilbur: Most of the time, it's fairly quiet in the café when it comes to customers, but on busy days, like the weekends with loud families or right after school with rowdy children or teens, I've seen that it can be a lot for him.

Tommy: Or maybe be just hates children? He doesn't seem to be incredibly fond of most children, especially orphans, for some reason.

Wilbur: Tommy...

Philza: Whenever he does feel overwhelmed, he tells me and takes a break for a bit. I'm happy to take over for a little while and let Techno get some fresh air since the ocean is literally at our doorstep as the café is on the marina next to the beach.

Wilbur: I take over in the event that Phil's too busy.

Tommy: Why don't I get to cover for him?

Philza: No offence Tommy, but you're a BIG no-no for that job. You'd probably yell at everyone to shut up and argue with the customers over change.

Tommy: I WOULD NOT-

Philza: ...

Tommy: Okay, I see what you mean.

Techno: Hey, what's going on?

Philza: A customer was just wondering how you deal with anxiety and with long days.

Techno: Well, when I'm not working, I'm practising fencing, which is a huge source of escapism for me. Playing matches against the rest of me team is something I find calming for some reason. It helps me focus and I feel more confident in myself after I win a fight. It takes my mind off of things a lot. Basically, it does for me what other sports do for a lot of people.

Wilbur: What do you do when it's cancelled?

Techno: I do some gardening with the flowers I get at the florist next door, you know, the one run by that girl Niki?

Tommy: Yeah, Tubbo works there.

Techno: Or, at least once a month, I play video games with my little sister.

Wilbur: Aww, when did you start doing that?

Techno: When I was younger if he came home early or missed school due to illness or, in some pretty bad cases, panic attacks.

Tommy: Oh.

Techno: It always helped me relax and it made my sister smile whenever I defeated a tough boss or something funny happened in the game, and she'd always cheer me on throughout.

Wilbur: That's adorable.

Techno: We still try to keep the tradition. It's a lot harder nowadays, but we always eventually find time and a good game to do it. It was actually thanks to this that I realised that fencing was what I wanted to do.

Philza: Oh, really? How so?

Techno: I always loved playing as the knight, or the sword fighter, or the hero with the legendary sword, and so did my sister. So when I found out that fencing was a thing and that I could be the swordfighting hero in real life, I jumped at the chance.

Philza: And now, look at you: A member of the national fencing team, doing what he loves and getting paid to do it.

Techno: Yep. I regret nothing.

Tommy: Hey Techno, do you think you could try to teach me how to fence again?

Techno: I regret one thing.

Thanks again for the ask! I hope you're doing well too.

[noroi1000]

Het hey ^^ hope youre doin well.

I wonder if i can ask for a jjk matchup (romantic).

Im a straight girl. Infp . Aquarious. 19 y.o

My height is 162cm

I'm shy and quiet with strangers but with my friends i always joke around. But it's not easy for me to make friends..

I love cats and my gallery is full of cat photos lol

I like reading books in my free time and i sometimes write too

Im also interested in spiritual things. I meditation almost everyday.

In relationship ima submissive and like to be teased lol

Ima overthinker and not confident bout myself but i can comfort ppl and listen to them for hours

a/n: I hope I can still write matchups 😅

I think your Jujutsu kaisen matchup is:

Due to everything Toge has to endure with his technique, he is quiet. He would never want to hurt anyone. He's used to not being able to speak, so he's quiet.

He doesn't want to show his symbols on his face. He is ashamed of them. He has to look at them every day, but it basically stopped bothering him. He got used to the technique, how he looks and everything related to it.

Even though Toge is very social, he will not speak to a stranger. Even though he cannot speak…

It's mainly about his strange vocabulary. Not once will he say anything that might even allow others to understand his feelings at the moment. He will be quiet, and only when he knows that the person is cool, will he be his true self.

He jokes often. Besides, he would like to joke all the time, but he pays attention to the situation. Sometimes no one would like to joke. When he knows he can't, he will stay calm. Or he will try to comfort someone.

His friends must understand him. That's why he needs people who will definitely not look at him strangely. And most of them just run away from it because it seems strange or even scary to them.

He doesn't act rashly. He will never take a thoughtless step forward. He prefers to wait a few seconds or even step back. For example, he would never mindlessly step onto an old bridge without thinking first.

Toge tries to be confident. It shows that he can take care of himself and someone else. He also says or does something right away more often because he would look for friends. Or even a soul mate. When all is well and no one escapes, he will listen to that person. He won't ignore anything.

Headcanon:

• He loves to hug you, tickle you or make little jokes at you. He could always tease you for a moment and then have a nice hug. It is important that it does not bother you. If you had forbidden him to tease you, he would have stopped.

• The mere thought that you are shorter than him makes him smile. He can wrap his arms around you, kiss you on the forehead. Being the taller in a relationship feels responsible for your safety and happiness. Therefore, he will keep you with him if he knows that something bad could happen to you.

(Even though he is short himself, he likes to be a big spoon in bed. In fact, no matter where you can cuddle, he will want you to cuddle with him. He's not for you. He likes to feel when you hug his chest.)

• He is one of the best people you can read and write to. Even if he doesn't read anything, he'll be sitting nearby. He can't start pissing you off with words that he's bored. But he can make you laugh and do anything else at the moment. But you can tell him you want to focus and he will accept it.

• Well… Actually, you'd have to tell him spirital things aren't summoning spirits and such. But when you explain it to him, he'll do it all with you. He also needs some things like these.

• In my opinion, he would be like a cat in a relationship. He would lie on your lap and pull your hands towards him for you to stroke him.

He also likes cats. At least he doesn't mind these animals.

He likes to look at cute photos with you or watch videos. So he would happily take the cat home.

If he could, he would call you his kitty. If you've stuck with each other any longer, there's no obstacle to staying with him yet, right? He will repay you with his love.

"Tuna Tuna" *he is waiting for you to turn around*

"Okaka!"

*He jumps at you with a headband of cat ears and a mask of a cat on his face*

[acciocriativity]

The bet || Harry Potter

Pairing: Fred Weasley and George Weasley x Platonic/Reader (Tiny not so tiny George Weasley x Reader)

Summary: You had a normal life at Hogwarts, until the Weasley twins decided they weren't going to leave you alone anymore, and what was the reason? You would give five galleons to anyone who knew the answer.

Word Count: 4,0k

It was still early, I was walking through the corridors towards the Great Hall when two red-haired figures appeared in my sight.

"Hey Y/N!", one of them waved cheerfully at me, I still had no idea which one. "Why do you suddenly look tall today?", the other said with a smile, which made me want to punch him.

"Why are you suddenly more annoying today? It sounds like a serious illness, so excuse me, I don't want to catch this", I walked as fast as I could so they couldn't keep up with me.

I could hear their laughter behind me and the whispering but decided not to pay attention to what was said, that would bring me more calmness.

And why do I basically run away from them? It is very simple.

One day I was just another Ravenclaw student, and the next day I had the attention of the most popular twins at Hogwarts.

They liked to tease me about absolutely everything, no matter if I was just sitting down reading or trying to concentrate in a class, one of them would find a way to annoy me.

I never tried to differentiate which was Fred and which was George, it made no difference, they both seemed equally annoying to me and knowing who is who was not going to guarantee me anything.

"Hey, wait. We have a deal for you", the tallest of them spoke with a grin plastered on his face as he walked up to me in stride.

"And why should I agree? Anything coming from you guys is pretty suspicious", I replied with my eyes screwed tight and crossed my arms.

"Because you can have your quiet time again, we won't tease you anymore as far as possible", the other said with a small smile and I stopped to think for a few seconds.

"Well, that sounds good enough, and what do I have to do? You're going to have to get something out of this, obviously", I still remained in the same position analyzing the two, who seemed to be enjoying themselves more every second.

"You'll have to guess who is who at the end of the day", one of them started and my face dropped at the same moment."Since we're nice, we'll just say it once", the other added.

"What if I don't succeed then? If there's a prank, I'm out."

"There won't be anything out of the ordinary, just an extra dose of us", I took a deep breath just imagining what my life would be like with these two following me around the castle. "So are you going to accept or not?", he raised an eyebrow.

I took a deep breath and looked away, a good opportunity had fallen into my hands but I would have the rest of my peace lost if I didn't win, which would be no small thing but a part of me was just screaming to accept it at once, the competitive part, the part that was going to win this little challenge.

"I accept, it won't be that hard", I replied with a smile, a wave of confidence built up inside me and I really thought it wouldn't be a problem at all.

"Okay then", they just walked past me and kept walking and if I could see my forehead, a big question mark would be hanging there, "Hey? You still have to tell me which is which, it was part of the deal", I said, taking a few steps behind them but they soon stopped and looked at me.

"Oh, you're so confident, do you really need us to tell you who's who?", I clenched my hands tightly to hold back the urge to kill him.

"Of course I don't need to but... HEY!It's not polite to leave a person talking alone", they had the audacity to walk off and wave at me on top of that.

7:30 a.m.

I wasn't going to get any help from them, why did I expect to get any? Obviously they don't want me to win but I will and they will have to swallow that. That's my new goal today, screw the herbology paper.

But now it would be more difficult, few people would know the difference, I would have to ask one of his friends or one of the other Weasleys who studied at Hogwarts.

I wasn't intimate with any of them but I had classes with some, we never spoke but I will change that today.

I just hope they actually tell me something useful, one of the twins could have easily told no one to help me and made everything even more difficult.

8:25 a.m

"Hey Kate, what's up?", I said with a smile just as she was about to pass me down the hall, it was really worth it to eat fast or I wouldn't have made it in time.

The expression on her face already told me everything, the same gleam in her eye that twins have when they are disturbing me, why do I get the impression that it won't be so easy?

"Good morning Y/N, do you need anything?", she said leaning against the wall with a mischievous smile that I chose to ignore. "Actually yes, you should already know, the Weasleys challenged me to set them apart and you as a friend should know how, anything is useful, anything really", I liked that she was direct because I could be too. I don't like wasting time with small talk, especially when I don’t have too much time.

"They actually told me it would happen, but they didn't tell me more details, what happens if you lose? Some kind of prank I bet.

"They will annoy me twice as much as they already do, I don't know how you manage to be friends with them, she stared at me for a few seconds and then grinned. "What?"

"I'll help you since you're asking me but maybe you'll soon see that it wouldn't be so bad to lose", I just nodded without really believing it would happen. "Fred is louder and generally more annoying, George is quieter and more careful. You can find out more by noticing for yourself, I'm going to get going, I want to practice a little before class begins", she pointed to the castle entrance.

"Thank you so much Kate, I'll owe you this one. See you later", I smiled and waved as she walked away from me after waving as well.

Now I know the basics but they might try to trick me, switch places or pretend to be the other one. I have to be prepared and there is only one way.

9:00 a.m

The bell rang and the halls filled with heads hurrying not to be late, especially the poor first year students heading for the dungeon. I could see some shaking on the way out of the Great Hall but my destination was completely different, I headed up the stairs along with the other forty years to Minerva's class.

There was no sign of any of the twins, if they had decided to skip this class my plan was destined to fail.

The class was about to start when the two of them entered without any hurry and I smiled internally for having kept an empty chair next to me, just in case.

"Are you gentlemen having a problem with your audition? The bell rang five minutes ago. This kind of behavior is not tolerated, Mr. Weasleys. Minus ten points for Gryffindor", her angry voice boomed, and no one seated dared to breathe.

"It won't happen again, professor", I was surprised not to hear any funny remarks as a comment and I'm sure she was too but didn't show it.

"Sit down and open your books, let's move one more step forward from yesterday's lesson...", she continued talking but I barely paid attention after one of them sat down next to me.

"So, you're George, you can tell me now that I already know", he looked a little surprised for a few seconds but soon regained his posture.

"How did you guess it? I didn't even say anything", he said looking at me intently and I just shrugged, I wasn't about to say since this is clearly a plus for me.

"That's a secret that will stay with me, it wasn't that hard", I commented, dipping my quill into the ink to start writing what Minerva was going over on the blackboard.

Behind us it was possible to hear Fred's excited whispers that I had learned to ignore after all these years. Now it seemed so much easier, it's not as if I hadn't noticed them both all this time, it's a bit impossible since they make themselves present everywhere.

We remained silent, since this is the only way I can concentrate. I even mentally thanked him for that, but it didn't seem to do any good today. My attention kept being drawn to the red-headed boy next to me, I couldn't help it.

Internally I blamed it on my will to win, because to do so I would have to pay more attention to him, that's all my body wanted to do, focus on George Weasley.

I only realized that I was crossing the line when I noticed that his cheeks started to take on a reddish tint and a shy little smile appeared. To make matters worse, there was Fred's giggles, who was watching everything with the best view; there was no way I could get away with this.

After this awkward moment, I forced myself to pay attention even though my desire was to get out of there, since he now decided to start watching me not as discreetly as he thought he was being. I was much better at that.

"Is there a problem?", I mustered up the courage to ask when it was already 15 minutes before the bell rang again.

I noticed him bite his lips and crack a small smile before looking forward again, "why would there be a problem?"

"You were looking at me", I answered quietly so as not to draw attention from the other students and especially from Minerva who was passing between the desks checking to see if everyone was practicing the spells correctly.

"You were looking at me before that, discretion is not your specialty, you know?", I was a few seconds without knowing how to answer that and in the meantime, I could see him savoring the fact that he had left me speechless.

"Yes, I was watching you to differentiate you better from your brother, and why were you looking at me?", I spoke in a direct tone looking him straight in the eyes and the other redhead's laughter sounded behind us and George gave him a nonchalant look, as did the woman, who had just passed us.

"Is something wrong Mr. Weasley?", she asked and of course, everyone around us had to pay attention too, because they had nothing else interesting to do.

"No, I just remembered a joke I heard, I could tell you if you want. I assure you it is very funny", he assured holding back the urge to laugh even harder.

"Your little jokes stay outside the room Mr. Weasley, and you all, if you haven't perfected today's transfiguration can get back to work", she caught everyone's attention and continued walking peacefully.

We ended up getting distracted from the main subject, he obviously took the chance of not answering me and just kept on training as I did.

12:00 a.m

We had the next 3 classes together and I stayed close to them and their friends as well. As I imagined everyone was very nice to me, we could have become friends much sooner if we weren't stuck in a fixed group of friends.

Some things had become much clearer in my head and others even more blurred. They didn't seem to be picking on anyone but me, although it hadn't happened all day. Then why? I was going to find out.

"Will you come sit with us today?", Katie said with an arm around Angelina's shoulders, both looking at me with a smile that wouldn't let me deny them anything.

"Sure, I'd love to. It's kind of funny that we have more things in common than I expected", I remarked as we walked slowly, with the hasty crowd in front of us. I would usually be with them but it's much better this way, time is not as important as catching up with everyone.

"I had no idea you liked quidditch, have you thought about joining the Ravenclaw team?", Angel, as she asked to be called, inquired and at that moment, I should but I didn't notice her gaze leave me and go to the twins, several times.

"I'm not as good at playing as I am at watching, so I prefer to stay in the stands", I replied with a small smile until I noticed everyone in that small group communicating with their eyes, which I chose to ignore.

"So Angeli, since when did you start playing?", I started the subject that was going to last throughout the entire lunch hour and it couldn't be better.

Everyone had some story to tell, I must admit that Fred's and George's were the funniest. At no time was there any kind of awkward silence, or a moment when I was not included in the conversation. I did notice that some of my classmates were surprised that I sat there, but in general they were looking at us because of the noise. Their special talent was talking, which I found refreshing since I could hear more and talk occasionally.

The worst part of it was that I ended up not paying as much attention to either George or Fred as I had planned, although now I know a little more about both of them and my new friends.

3:00 p.m.

After two classes of Aritmancia, I had a free period and many homework assignments to do and as I walked to the library, a familiar voice called out to me.

"Y/N!", I turned around and was faced with George and his broom near the stairs, not so far from me, "We are going to practice a little, do you want to come too?", I was about to say no, as I was already busy but then I remembered, I still had to guess who was who at the end of the day.

I had really forgotten and started to enjoy their company, I had to remind myself that I wanted to win and that it made perfect sense to spend some more time with him, if it meant that I could guarantee it. Or at least, I tried to convince myself of that.

"Sure, who else will be training?", I asked as I walked over to him and then we walked together to the castle entrance and towards the field. "Just Angelina and Fred, the others have classes or something to do," and I just nodded in agreement.

We hadn't spent any time alone since Transfiguration class and I didn't know what to say, as did he but I didn't feel uncomfortable, just lost in my own thoughts.

"You came to watch half the best quadribol team play today. You won't regret it," Fred was the first to speak up as soon as we arrived and I could only laugh, how could one person be so confident? I needed some tips.

"My expectations are higher than you Weasley, you better not let me down after that speech," I wasn't trying to be funny but I heard a chuckle come from the redhead next to me. "You're not out of it George, none of you. But remember, no pressure. I'm only going to judge a little bit," I said smirking, not really taking any of the words I said seriously.

"Go sit down and prepare to be impressed," the black haired girl gave the last words, grabbed her own broom and flew to the three right hoops as I hurried to the stands.

Luckily, I didn't miss much and less than 5 minutes later, I could tell with certainty how good the three were. They took turns as goalkeepers for Angelina, even though it wasn't really their position in the game.And after 15 minutes, the dynamic changed for the two of them to try to hit her, one at a time, for them to practice as beaters.

But honestly, I paid much less attention than I normally do. I couldn't tell them apart from so far away, and this realization made me face the shameless excuse I had created for myself. I just wanted to be there, and the reason for that I wouldn't say out loud.

More than 30 minutes later, the three of them instead of landing on the ground, came flying towards me and stopped by my side.

"So you can talk about how impressed you are now", I pretended to think for a few seconds and the indignation on his face was so funny I almost didn't say it but after such an arduous training like that, they deserved it.

"You guys were amazing, if someone from another house could watch the official training sessions I would really come to see more", I smiled and it was extremely adorable to see George's already red face redden even more after my compliment.

"You already know you can't watch the official practices, we are finally starting to understand each other", Fred said and took a step to hug me and I immediately took one back. "You're soaking wet Fred Weasley, don't even think about it. This is not the time for hugs".

"But I think it's a good idea sweetie, you can't hide from a Weasley, so just accept it", he said with an evil grin on his face and I was ready to run, I hated sweat especially when it wasn't mine but his long legs came into action once again.

"That's the most disgusting thing I've ever experienced, so you have something to be proud of after all", I complained, pulling away seconds after he had cornered me in the hug, which wouldn't have been so bad if it had been any other time.

"If that's the grossest one, you really don't know what's waiting for you honey. This is just the beginning," Angel said with a satisfied smile on his face. "But we better go now, I need a shower and we still have one last class today," she added and flew out of there after waving to us.

"Yeah, I need to take a shower too, I'll see you guys later," Fred said before getting out of there as quickly as possible, leaving me alone with George again.

"Well, do you want a ride? It's much quicker to get down that way," he smiled slightly at me and I agreed without a second thought.

I held his bare arm, because I thought it was better than hugging him and regret appeared immediately because I always had some issues with flying. It wasn't the worst thing in the world but it was far from being one of my favorites.

All I could do was close my eyes as we crossed the field, my hands automatically closed around his arm, the weather was windy and I could feel the shivers that went through his now red skin as well as mine.

It was a few seconds if I'm really honest but it didn't feel like it to me, I've never picked up a broom other than for classes and it's been a long time since I stopped having fun in those classes.

I was brought out of my thoughts when I felt my feet on the ground again.

"I'll see you later then, I haven't forgotten about the bet. You better be prepared," he gave me a beautiful smile and the consequences of that is the only thing I wasn't prepared for.

5:00 p.m.

There are those moments when you have to stop and ask yourself, what the hell is happening to me? For countless reasons obviously, and it was my turn. I didn't come up with any answers that made me blind to reality, which was really frustrating because that way it would be easier for me to just ignore.

But nobody told me it was going to be easy, which is a shame because I would have someone to blame.

All this played out in my head before I received an owl from them, telling me that I could go to the Gryffindor common room to finish our bet, along with the password for the day. I was prepared after being warned by basically all their friends, all I could think of on the way there were some spells, mainly revenge because I wouldn't let it go if there really was a prank.

But what happened was quite different, the place was quieter than I imagined, although they had many people sitting and talking normally including Fred and George.

"Oh hello stranger, you have finally decided to give us the honor of your presence, I can say for everyone, we are all grateful," I had barely stepped into the room when Fred spoke up with the most sarcastic smile I have ever seen, should I be confused?

"If I get all this reception every time I come here, I will definitely come back more often. Thank you, I feel very welcome," I said with an equally big smile, causing him to roll his eyes.

"Okay smartass, it's time for your answer," he continued speaking, the same voice but now that I was close, in front of them, I noticed that there was something very wrong there.

"Why are you talking like that George?", was my only thought, they were imitating each other, the voice was extremely similar, I could never tell the difference just by that, but looking at him, it is impossible to be mistaken.

Their expression dropped on the spot and I realized that there were more people watching me and maybe they knew the plan, because everyone was a little shocked too, was it that simple?

"That's impossible, who was the snitch that told you? Whoever it was, you're going to have a tough future," Fred even stood up and didn't bother to do another voice, he spoke and I was sure I won.

"Nobody told me, I didn't need much to realize that you guys were faking it. He spent the whole conversation scratching his arm, it's been like that all day," I pointed to George who had not taken his eyes off my person so far.

At that moment they looked at each other for a few seconds and then back at me. I should be happy but I wasn't. Even if I wasn't going to admit it out loud, they just proved to me how amazing they are and I wasn't going to lose that.

"Now that I've won, I want to change my reward. It's very simple, I want to reverse the reward and the punishment. I want an extra dose of Weasleys," I had to get a certain amount of shyness out of the way to say this but it was worth it.

It was worth it because I could see a sparkle in both of their eyes that went beyond a successful prank, it was worth it because I had the best years at Hogwarts with the best friends I could ever want. It was worth it because I found the best boyfriend in the world that day. I never thought I would be so grateful for a silly bet.

Harry Potter Masterlist

[lilyclawthorne]

Keeping Up A-fear-ance's Thoughts

I finished writing this shortly after 3 am after watching the new episode like three times because I simply had too much energy about it and I have so many thoughts because I simply live for clawthornes and also I tried to break it up with more photos this time sorry not sorry if it's a lot ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

YOUNG EDA!! let me just say I am quite a fan of opening with a flashback like we've done here and the last episode

"we have never seen a curse like this before" Lilith you had shit luck picking out curses huh

"cut it out if we have to" goddamn Gwen let'a calm the fuck down a bit.

anyways we've only really seen young Eda as a wild and confident and happy little child so I appreciate seeing this side of her with the anxiety and fear she's feeling here. I love seeing what the curse stuff was like for her as a kid

Gwen: I raised a perfectly fine kid

Me: no you didn't look at her she's got anxiety

I'm guessing this is their backyard or just some woods behind their house?? wonder if the portal was placed there by another elder family member.

lmao I can't even begin to imagine what small Eda experiencing the human realm was like for the first time

Gwens giving me "I can't accept that my child is disabled/chronically ill/etc." here. y’know the kinda parent that'll put their kid through hell over something they probably will find a way to learn to live with (which Eda did do)

ok that's it I humbly request to know the story behind the fang now (also the noise she made when she put it in was freaking cute)

new dress! new boots! new dress! new boots!

..yikes that fridge is empty

"calm down the curse acts stronger when you're stressed" Eda do you know who you're talking to here

confirmation losing limbs is in fact a side effect of the curse!! (y'know since Eda originally said it just happens when you get older)

please I love these sisters they're so sweet and make me wanna go 🥺

"suddenly curious about my past" "always. always curious" Luz says exactly what we all think

witchlet?? sweet flea?? she's got pet names for them 🥺 (although idk how much I'd like to be referred to as any kind of flea sorry Lilith)

ok Gwen is very much not close to what I expected and I'm kinda grateful for that

she's more like super caring but still managed to royally fuck up which was my original head canon for clawthorne parents so uh that's cool. but literally, look at their body language, Eda's pissed, Lilith's sad and making herself small. she's clearly messed up with her parenting on both of them along the way.

"who knows what they put in those nasty concoctions?" mama clawthorne would be a fucking anti-vaxxer wouldn't she

ok I side with Eda here more than Luz and Lilith. just because Luz misses her mother, or Lilith hasn’t seen their mom in so long doesn’t mean Eda has to feel all grateful for the presence of Gwen, especially if the woman has caused her a lot of trouble over the years

I feel like the fact that its actually both Lilith and Gwendolyn have spent their whole lives dedicated to trying to find a cure could probably have held some kind of weight on Eda at some point. Even though she shouldn't feel guilty or responsible for that, I still feel like it's gotta suck knowing these people have spent so much time on something you know is likely never gonna happen, all for you.

Lilith 😞 her mother really just didn't pay attention to her all these years

hey if this guy does some next level healing magic then why isn't he more well-known, huh? why’d it take so long to come across him?? Gwen do you know what the fuck you're doing cause I think you don't

Lilith just because you're depressed about your mom doesn't mean you have to bring king down too 😠

SUPER irrelevant but is anyone else just bothered by the way Lilith is holding her spoon?? that doesn't seem like a comfortable way to hold a spoon. also is she left handed??

"knife season came early" EDA WHAT DOES THAT MEAN. is this a boiling isles things or is this a it’s common for people to throw knives at you thing

also I want to be surprised Eda fell for the apple blood signs but I am not 😔 

Luz please trust you're gut on this one and not mama clawthorne

ok now I need to know why the fridge was empty but they had 18 cartons of ice cream this is why you guys don't have food you're wasting it all on ice cream.

wow never thought I'd see the day hooty became the voice of reason

also, night market ice cream?? are they implying this ice cream is like, edibles of some sort?? Lilith does seem kinda high here ngl. idk man but at least she wants to stand up for herself so good for her.

PLEASE kings just offering her ice cream while she transforms

"first in a series" Gwen honey oh no. you've been duped. I think we can see where Lilith got her naïveté from huh.

Also, nice snatch Luz 😊

anyways love how this show is basically making fun of moms who refuse to give their kids proper medical treatment or listen to medical professionals here

EXCUSE ME why do we know Gwen's palisman's name before we know Lilith's?????

"I am a mother who'll do anything for her daughter" you're mom who's suffocating obsession with one daughter has left the other neglected and is currently causing her to turn into a full on beast ya dummy

Eda DOES have a right to be upset. it sucks that her own valid emotions that she should get to feel will cause her while body to betray her.

PLEASE I’M SO GLAD LILITH’S BEAST DESIGN LOOKS LIKE HER AND IS NOT THE THING FROM THE TRAILER THAT IS ACTUALLY IN EDA"S HEAD WHEN SHE’S TRANSFORMED

but also why is she SO massive?? also anyone concerned that this is her first transformation and the light glyph trick wouldn't even work??

Gwen look at what you've done, you've fostered feelings of inferiority in one daughter causing her to feel the need for sibling rivalry that the pure instincts of the raven beast cannot suppress no matter how much their sisterly relationship had improved.

HOW COULD YOUR OTHER DAUGHTER ALSO BEING CURSED BE A PART OF THE PROCESS GWEN??

"after Eda was cursed, I joined the beast keeping coven" woah woah WOAH. you're telling me you only joined because of trying to help Eda. that covens existed, before Eda got cursed, and you very much weren't a part of one. combine that with "some words for belos" she has and do I smell wild witch theory still plausible???

anyways at least mama clawthorne is getting some sense into her head here

Morton c'mon help a girl out, that's some dang good art too what the heck dude

ok fine mama clawthorne to the rescue

no pls not raven beast Lilith crying im crying now

Gwen: I raised a fine and self-sufficient child

Me: no you didn't look at her. she's got, SO MUCH.

GODDAMN THATS SOME POWER. ngl this only adds fuel to the fire in my head that there was some kinda reasoning these sisters were torn apart, that someone felt they'd be too powerful together (and they were probably right)

"I heard you but I couldn't stop myself, I couldn't do anything" may be just because she's not used to the curse but again part of me is concerned that because she couldn't pull herself out of it even a little bit like Eda did that there's something wrong there. but she also could've been stressed beyond reasonably calming herself down too.

ok but this is sweet

NOOO im so sad Lilith's leaving :( I literally cried ok

"you lived here?" fine OKAY king that was hilarious even if im sad about this

"reconnect with dad" excuse me where the fuck has this man been in the middle of all of this. curse shit is going DOWN and he's just chilling at home.

I am curious about people's thoughts regarding the whole Lilith regression thing and the fact that she's literally going to be living with her parents again. I feel like it could help nurture that inner child she's been reverting back to and help her out a LOT. but I could also be concerned about it feeding into the regression and making it worse?? idk and this show probably ain't getting that actually deep into psych anyways

"some day my hair is gonna be big enough to do that too" Luz I cannot wait for the day. also mood, I wish I could do that too.

alright who's holding the fucking pen for hooty we need a volunteer RIGHT NOW so we can remain in contact with Lulu

NOT THE ONLY HUMAN? my bets on the real azura rip never mind she said he

Titan’s Blood?? interesting. If the blood of the titan is around I wonder what that means regarding the titans existence, and how long its been since the titan fell.

AHH BABY LUZ PHOTO

ALSO WHO THE FUCK IS THAT?? They're really gonna spring that on us like this??? Camila's gotta notice somethings wrong right??? Unless any differences she just chalks up to the camp?? oh god :(

well, anyways lumity shippers come get yo juice next weekend

anyways im gonna need to add a NOT canon compliant tag on that one Gwendolyn fic I wrote because it definitely do not comply anymore

[dragon-kazansky]

Yes please do! Take your time on writing it! I understand the name changes. If you need to message me it you can

I'll try and keep it simple. These names are made up because I want to keep my colleagues privacy.

This is a long story.

When I got in this morning, my supervisor (Polly) and my colleague (Anya) were chatting. My supervisor had been ill with covid last week, so her shifts had been covered by our boss (Matt), who had to cover other shifts because 2 other colleagues then tested positive for covid. This is important to remember.

Matt was pissed that he had to cover so many shifts (2 of those being supervisors because otherwise we wouldn't have anyone to open the cafe). Which left the rest of us, myself, Abbie, and Anya.

When I got in, Polly and Anya turned to me and asked me about what happened yesterday. I told them everything. Abbie worked last Wednesday with Matt, and one other colleague who hadn't rested positive yet. Matt was getting worked up with all the orders, and was being quite demanding. Abbie has mental health issues due to her troubled childhood, and was doing her best to be her normal cheerful self and get everything done. On Wednesday afternoon Abbie complained about a pain in her chest. Matt asked if she was in pain, she replied that it hurt, so yes. He didn't do anything. Abbie tried to ignore it and carry on. A bit later her arm was tingling and her chest felt worse. Matt wouldn't call medical at the centre. Abbie panicked and called an ambulance, she was scared she was having a heart attack. He didn't say anything to her.

Abbie went to hospital that afternoon.

Yesterday Abbie was on shift with me, she was Ok. Basically she had an anxiety attack under the stress of Matt. Matt is to blame. Her doctor has her on medication as of today.

Now. This is where things take a turn.

We have this supervisor, Chloe. No one likes her. No one likes her because she's a snitch, she thinks she's a manager, she is not, and she complains about the way our actual manager (Polly) does things. Keep in mind, Chloe only supervises two shifts a week.

Yesterday Abbie confided in me about everything that had happened. Abbie wanted to make it clear that she was going to call her doctor that afternoon (yesterday) about taking sick leave because she needed time to calm down and get her head straight. Her mental health was declining. I can't blame her.

Last night I got a message from Chloe asking me to cover a shift tomorrow. Wednesday and Thursday are my days off at the moment. They're my days. The message basically read If Abbie gets a sick note, can I ask you to come in so I'm not left alone with Matt. I said no. I have plans. I'm not cancelling them. She replied with OK.

Back to this morning, I had told Anya and Polly about the message. It clicked. They wouldn't have known anything had happened yesterday unless someone had said something. I had only just arrived, so I hadn't told them because they already knew. Matt had called them this morning asking about all the whining Abbie had been doing. Well, the only other person who could have told him about Abbie's rant is the only other person sho was there: Chloe.

Why would she have asked me to cover a shift that she couldn't guarantee Abbie would be excused from? Because she was going to tell Matt about it so he could change the rota to accommodate the change.

Polly called Abbie to check in with her. As of today she is on medication. That only happened today. Chloe couldn't have known yesterday it would actually happen. She was preparing for a 50/50 chance ahead of time. She gone behind Abbie's back about her mental health to the boss. That's Abbie's business, not hers.

Abbie is now on a minimum 2 week sick leave. She sent a letter to Matt, without seeing him face to face because she can't stand to. They are a staff member down tomorrow, but I'm not cancelling my plans to cover it. These are my 2 days off during the week.

Matt apparently tried to play it off to Polly that everything he had said to Abbie (I don't know all the details there) on Wednesday was a joke. But what kind of joke has someone ending up in hospital?

Polly, knowing no one can stand Matt, and Chloe too, wants everyone to get together at some point to try and do something.

There is more regarding Matt but that doesn't directly connect to this. I feel so sorry for Abbie because none of that should have happened. I hope she takes plenty of rest. She has a 10 month year old she needs to look after. If her mental health gets worse, then what? :(

This is my work life!! Talk about the drama.

[callisto-rants]

Starting a new ✨series✨ that no one asked for! ( ꈍᴗꈍ)

Callisto-Rants presents...

Here's my Two Cents

Where we just throw down our two cents on how we would change a series to make it better, in our own personal opinion.

[You can Block this tag if you're not interested in this series: #Here's Our Two Cents]

Here's my Two Cents

Yarichin Bitch Club.

Ever since I had the misfortune of having that opening theme song stuck in my head because of countless memes and tiktok edits. . . I have wished for days to have the ability to create a time machine to prevent myself from saying. . .

"okay, fine I'll bite the bullet and check out the source material."

Now if you're reading this and thinking, "huh. I never heard of this series..." let me just tell you, GOD I WISH I WAS YOU RIGHT NOW.

No one was going to tell me this BL Manga about a "pHoTogRaPhY cLuB" wasn't completely INSANE? I was just supposed to find out Three Volumes Later??

Now some of y'all who have read the source material might be thinking. . .

"Okay Callisto, get over it it's obviously supposed to be a comedy it's not meant to be taken seriously 🙄"

And to that I say... I mean I guess??? But do we really need all of THAT to make it a comedy?? I feel like you could still have an entertaining comedy BL Manga without 90% of the shit that goes on in that series..... But that's just ✨my two cents✨ take it or leave it.

FIRST THINGS FIRST, here's all the stuff I'd automatically remove from this series off the bat.

💀 The Gang Bangs.

💀 Teacher x Student Relationships.

💀 In fact all instances of unconsensual acts & sexual assault committed in this manga. Throw all of that away.

💀 the fact that the term Bisexual was used as a replacement for the term switch, and had nothing to do with the sexual orientation itself whatsoever.

💀 The High School Setting.

💀 Whatever the fuck Yuri was on.

💀 90% of the hyper sexualized traits these characters had.

Now here's what I'd change to make it better... Basically here's an AU of what if it was actually a normal photography club....

Actually make it a fucking Photography Club. Not a sex club that's in a fuckin HIGH SCHOOL. Hell, you could just throw this in a college setting too, for more mature themes.

Main character, Takashi Toono a college student that's trying to get out of his comfort zone more. So he decides to join the photography club, because he thinks it's not demanding to require anything of him compared to any other club on campus. He knows completely NOTHING about photography, and doesn't have any passion for the art media. His Character growth would be learning to appreciate the art media While learning what it means to him, as well as who he wants to be as he enters the adult world as a young adult.

Yuu Kashima, can stay as Takashi's love interest. Also, I feel like all the members should have a specific style of taking photos that correlates with their personality in some way. Yuu's photography style would be something the lines of Candid photography which is a type of photography style that's main focus is to take photos in the moment or in surprise. Something he has already done when he took that photo of Takashi. I also feel like Yuu would be the one to keep pushing Takashi to love photography, and understand it's more than snapping a photo.

Kyousuke Yaguchi, can stay as the Love Rival for Yuu Kashima and overall keep his personality? It was actually pretty interesting and I liked his Character dynamics with everyone else. Kyousuke Yaguchi can also stay as the outsider that directly / indirectly influences Everyone else in the club. Causing Takashi to explore his feelings and expand his social group, and make him think about what he wants to capture in his photos. Overall the same interaction between Kyousuke & Yuu Kashima with their rivalry and brotherly relationship at it's breaking point. As well as, Kyousuke and Yui's relationship being tense with miscommunication.

Yui Tamura, I imagine Yui's photography style would be more of Adventure (capturing shots in the great outdoors, usually involving extreme sports; mountain-climbing, skiing, kayaking, sky diving, etc) & Sports Photography. Which could create interesting interactions between Kyousuke and Yui. Cue Yui trying to cover up the fact that, every time the soccer club commissions Yui to take some photos of their club activity to promote their club, all of Yui's photos are of Kyousuke playing soccer. Causing Yui to complain to Kyousuke to get out of his shots and that he's ruining them by being in all of them. So, Kyousuke just shouts back "then stop following me around with your camera, DUMBASS". Just imagine Them bickering, because Yui 100% did not delete the photo he captured of Kyousuke getting knocked out by a soccer ball to the face.

Itsuki Shikatani would definitely be in the club, but only because he prefers to have his photos be taken, more than he likes taking photos himself. He would probably be a cross dresser, who enjoys dressing up in feminine articles of clothing and posing for photos. Everyone on campus who doesn't know Itsuki personally, always asks who the beautiful woman in these photos are, the club president and vice President always just says it's one of their cousins that happen to be in town. If Itsuki had to have a style of photography, it would probably be fashion.

Toru Fujisaki. . . This one is difficult only because his Character is purely centered around Yuki's Character. . . So I'm going to take some creative liberties here. . . Probably really insecure about himself, because he feels like he's a wall flower that's really forgettable, that no one cares about. Although, it's mostly because he's shooting himself in the foot by not letting one have the opportunity to get to know him to give him a chance, in the first place. Until, he meets Yuki who makes him realize that not everyone sees him as a wall flower and someone can notice his nicer qualities about himself that he's hiding away. Toru's Character development in this AU, would be for for him to learn to love himself more and try to trust people to accept him. As well as to expand his social circle with the support of not only Yuki, but the Photography Club as well. At first I bet, he would only feel comfortable with Yuki taking his photos and modeling only for him, but over time he'd let the other club members take his photo when he gets more confident in himself. While also, developing his own style of photography, that isn't just "cute photos of Yuri", it would probably be Still Life or Portrait.

Ayato Yuri, okay first. . . I'm still not over the fact that this boy was written like a deranged feral child, that was given access to a pornhub account way too early in life. While being dropped on his head several times, before and after his first words. Anyhow. . . I feel like Yuri would fit the trope of the genius, that no one understands in any capacity. His mind is 10 steps ahead of everyone else and he forgets to slow down and explain what the fuck he's talking about, when he goes into a passionate rant about photography. With endless rambles about golden ratio, gold lighting and blue lighting, and how he needs these specific props, that don't seem to fit the theme of the photo at all to make it perfect. But despite that, his photos always come out beautifully. No one can deny that his methods might be extremely weird, but they always work out way too well to give anyone the opportunity to chastise him. Anyone trying to work with Yuri often leaves the experience with a beautiful photo in hand, but an enormous headache. Even members within the photography club can't keep up with Yuri most of the time either, he's often in his own little world that just makes sense to only him. He can be a eccentric and passionate about his hobby and goofy to not make people feel too uncomfortable with the huge distance he unintentionally places between himself and others when he doesn't bother to slow down for anyone. But, he still has a good heart to make sure everyone gets a piece of art that'll always be memorable to them. Additionally, with that being said I feel like Toru would be the few people that would consistently attempt to keep up with Yuri, when he's a light year away from everyone else in his rambles. Toru wouldn't shut down and show disinterest in what Yuri says when he can no longer keep up, he's always being supportive and encouraging Yuri to continue because he knows it makes him happy to be able to express his passion. And sometimes, Yuri will pause and explain a bit to let Toru keep up with him, because he just truly appreciates someone trying to get closer to him, without making him feel bad. I would say Yuri is a jack of all trades when it comes to Photography styles. There isn't a single style he is terrible at, but he truly excels at Abstract Photography.

Koshiro Itome I think Koshiro would fit the silent type trope, but with a lot on his mind. Always over thinking things, and although he looks calm his mind is always buzzing with 500 things at once. Because, of this the only way he can find some semblance of peace is by going out for a nature walk and letting the environment take his mind off things. He's always worries about deadlines for projects, meeting up with clients face to face for the first time, whether or not a company will like his photos he submitted, if his boyfriend Akemi is okay, what if he doesn't find anything to take a picture of or if he's missing the perfect shot right now, will the club be okay after they all graduate, what else can be learn to improve his skills etc etc. Akemi can always tell when he's actually calm and when he's just zoned out and drowning in his own worries behind his calm demeanor. Luckily for Akemi, he knows exactly what to do to make him feel better, like a life boat to his pleas for help in the vast ocean of his thoughts. Koshiro is 100% the mom friend in the club, always helping newbies out on how to properly take care of their equipment, and the general basics, stopping people from bickering and carrying around a Mary Poppins bag of useful items. "Damn I forgot to bring my infrared lens with me!" "It's okay I brought a spare, here you go." Koshiro's photography style would be Nature & Wild life, cue everyone wondering how the hell he managed to capture a photo of baby bear and it's mother so close up with such clarity with the equipment he has on him. It should be impossible there's no way he could it's just unlikely, but all Koshiro does in response is just shrugging calmly "I just slowly walked up to them, and took some photos and went my way after I was done, they weren't bothered at all." At first no one believes him, until they see the next photo of him petting the mother bear, and within the next photo of him holding the baby bears paw. I like to think Akemi is always bragging at how his boyfriend is basically a Disney Prince, with the way animals just trust him enough to let Koshiro approach to take the photos. Of course Akemi has the proof that his Boyfriend is not making any of these up. With photo evidence he had taken from a incredibly safe distance away, of Koshiro just interacting with wildlife at such a close distance. Because, Akemi was not in fact gifted the ability of a Disney prince, to be doing that shit that Koshiro pulls on a daily basis. I feel like because of this Akemi can be a bit over protective of Koshiro, always telling him to text him before he goes to work and he gets back home, so he knows a feral bear didn't devour his boyfriend in the woods. He tries his best to join Koshiro while he works so he can be at peace of mind that Koshiro is in fact safe, but they both know it's very difficult for Koshiro to focus. When his boyfriend is being incredibly cute how could he remember he's here to take photos of the wild life and not his boyfriend? That and Akemi always accidentally scares away the wildlife, when he accidentally reads the animals body language wrong as any attempt to devour his boyfriend. Akemi will lose 25 years of his life with amount of false alarms, he has encountered in those damn woods.

Keiichi Akemi, Akemi is definitely one of those smug bastards, that has an ulterative motive or an ace up his sleeve. Appearing sweet and kind until you realize it was a facade. But one way or another you find yourself wrapped up in his convoluted plans, where you're either in his photoshoot as a model or you're carrying all his equipment, while he goes from one job to the next. Akemi's photography style would be Wedding Photography & Landscape something he definitely would've picked up from the countless outings he had with Koshiro in the outdoors. Akemi's friends are almost always married or paired up together, and that's no coincidence. This man is a match-making demon, a hopeless romantic who loves to see a budding romance finally bloom. So, he can snag a fat check when they thank him for brining them together and hire him as the official wedding photographer. His intuition is never wrong about the perfect pairings and how to push the right buttons to move things along, without getting directly involved until the right time comes. Something, that will be a pain in Toono's ass down the line as he stays in the Photography Club.

Overall, I feel like this could've been a really nice BL Manga which was a love letter to the art media of Photography. As Toono figures out what Photography means to him and how he wants to use it to express his feelings. "Why do you take photos? What do you want to say in these photos and tell people without the ability of using your words?" I feel like at first Toono, would just be confused "it's just a photo what's so special about it? You take it as a cool momento for something."

But, as time goes on, and he learns why everyone in the club enjoys photography and why they're here, he learns it's more than that. Whether it be to vent something you're unable to express in words, express your love for something or someone, to tell a story, to inspire others, to feel free, to share something with someone. All these different forms of expression, will let Toono figure out what he wants from photography and how he plans on expressing it.

Also instead of the whole "have sex with someone in one month or we gang bang you against your will" dilemma. . . I feel like another suspenseful situation could have been, "Create a photo album, that will impress all of us in one month, or you have to help us all out with our next projects." Which at first doesn't sound terrible, until you remember...

Yui is a thrill seeker, and would probably push you off a cliff to snag a cool photo. Or force you to be his pack mule as you climb up serval mountains.

Itsuki would force you to cross dress and model different fashion styles to make you look like a clown for his own amusement. All the while he revels in your shame, and points out how these colors don't suit you at all, but ignores the fact he's the one who put you in that outfit in the first place.

Yuri is such a wild card that you honest to God don't know what the fuck will happen to you, it'll be like being on an acid trip the whole time. And not knowing what will happen brings you more fear than knowing what will.

Koshiro would probably bring you to a wolf den full of hungry ravenous wolves, and let you accidentally get eaten alive by a pack of wolves. While he takes pictures of puppies, without a care in the world.

Akemi... Akemi just scares Toono, he seems like the safest bet out of everyone else. But Toono knows better to trust that sweet smile. Toono would be safer walking into Satan's house than spend a day with Akemi at work. Whatever he would have planned for them if he were to lose this challenge would not be good for his sanity. He hates how he knows Akemi wants just that for Toono to know he's not going to be safe either. Akemi would probably make him cry with prying questions about his romance life. While hitting too close to home with all his assumptions about him that he can't argue back. It's losing battle from there on out.

The only problem for Toono is Everyone in this club is so different, that it's almost impossible to be able to impress them all. None of them agree, which style is better or having almost anything in common photography style wise. Toono can't just half-heartedly replicate anyone's style either, he's going to actually try and fail miserably to understand this art media better, like everyone else. I think after losing the challenge and spending time with everyone, Toono would come to really like the club and everyone else in it.

And that's my ✨two cents✨ on how this story could've been better if it didn't focus too much on the whole pwp aspect.

Take it or leave it.

[one-boring-person]

You Look Nervous.

David (The Lost Boys) x reader

Warnings: Implied sexual content (very much implied) .

Requested by @theeblueehazee : "I have a request if you're still taking them? It's another David request because I'm vampire trash basically lol maybe a story about David really liking or evening the reader, and he wants her to meet the guys. But he's super scared of them embarrassing him in front of her or afraid that they'll scare her, period, because she's a nice but really shy person? So David makes the boys swear to be on their best behaviour but Paul and Marko don't know the meaning of it lol I just love your stories!❤❤

A/N: I'm glad you like my stories! That really makes my day 😅💛 and thank you for requesting! I hope this works for what you had in mind❤

Masterlist

"Stop picking."

I look up at the blonde biker as he reaches a gloved hand over, taking mine in his as he tries to pull my fingers from my sleeves, smiling slightly as he gives me a reassuring look, though there's something off about his behaviour. As usual, he stands leaning against his motorcycle, a cigarette between his lips as he watches the crowd, but his demeanor seems tense, his eyes flicking over the writhing hoard of people almost nervously, neck muscles taut as he cranes his head around, as if looking for something, or someone.

"Sorry." I reply quietly, casting a look over his posture again, my brow wrinkling in confusion.

Noticing my gaze, David fixes his piercing eyes on me, cocking his head a bit as he exhales a breath of smoke, eyebrows drawing together curiously.

"What?"

"Oh, well, you look kinda nervous." I inform him, biting my lip as I turn my gaze away from him, worried that I've brought up something I shouldn't have, my free hand instinctually lifting to my face, where I start to chew on my fingernails, trying not to wince when I accidentally catch one of the already bitten-down ones.

"I do? How come?" The platinum blonde queries, visibly adjusting himself, though this only proves my theory.

I go to reply, only to be cut off by the sound of loud motorcycle engines revving to my right, the blonde to my left tensing again, his jaw clenching barely noticeably as he catches sight of the riders, my own gaze turning to the newcomers. Upon seeing them, my eyes widen, weight shifting inadvertently onto the balls of my feet, as if ready to up and leave.

The closest is a tall, tanned brunette with dark eyes, his expression seemingly neutral as he makes eye contact with me, barely reacting to my presence at all, his quietness as well as the fact he is shirtless beneath his leather jacket slightly unnerving me despite the very brief flash of a smile he sends my way. Just behind him is a shorter blonde with curly hair, a broad smirk plastered across his face as he catches sight of me, his doe eyes boring into me with a mischievous glint, eyebrows raised at my presence. As if mimicking me, he lifts a thumb to his mouth, where he starts biting at it, keeping eye contact the entire time, even as he leans back to speak to the last of them. This one is a lanky Twisted Sister lookalike, his dishevelled hair and choice of attire leading me to think this, though my mind briefly short-circuits when I notice him blatantly raking his eyes over my form, the action drawing a deep blush to my cheeks as I shift again, pulling the sleeves of my jacket over my hands in slight discomfort. Seeing this, David moves so he is standing closer to me, gently pressing his chest against my back reassuringly, his hand at my hip protectively. Looking up into his face, I realise he is carrying an odd expression, as if warning the others of something.

"Damn, who brought the eye candy?" The Twisted Sister lookalike remarks in way of greeting, winking suggestively at me as he dismounts from his bike, lip between his teeth, "I'm Paul, by the way."

Swallowing, I try to fight the rising blush again, leaning back against David as much as possible for support, the solidness of his chest behind me reassuring me a little.

"(Y/n). It's nice to meet you." I make the mistake of offering him my hand to shake, surprised when the other, smaller blonde skips in ahead of Paul, scooping my hand up and lifting it to his lips, which he then uses to press a soft kiss to my knuckles. Shocked, I withdraw my hand quickly, the action far too intimate to have come from a complete stranger. Behind me, I feel David's chest vibrate as he lets out a cautionary growl of sorts, both of the other blondes giggling at this.

"I'm Marko." The short one informs me, taking my hand in his again as he uses it to pull me forwards slightly, Paul quickly slinging an arm around my shoulders as I'm helplessly dragged in towards them. I stiffen as I feel Paul nuzzle at my neck, the blonde deliberately sniffing at me, his breath hot against the skin there, though I don't feel it long, my instincts kicking in as I pull away again, accidentally knocking into Marko, who steadies me against his chest, drawing a surprised squeak from me as he smirks down at me.

"She smells great, where'd you find her?" Paul comments to David, whose jaw is clenched, his muscles rigid as he watches this exchange, reaching out to gently pull me back to him, wrapping an arm around my waist again, fingers pressing into me slightly in anger.

"Aww, come on! We won't bite..." Marko teases, bursting into a fit of giggles with Paul at some inside joke until their companion gives the latter a clip round the ear.

"Hey! I didn't make the joke!" He protests, rubbing his head a bit, clearly a bit disgruntled after this, though his friend can barely control himself.

"Doesn't mean you don't deserve it." The brunette points out, rolling his eyes in exasperation at the other two before turning back to me, "I'm Dwayne. It's nice to finally meet you, (Y/n), we've heard a lot about you."

"Y-You have?" I manage, still a little shaken after my encounter with the Terrible Two, surprised that they've heard about me at all: David doesn't seem like the type to share his feelings, seeing as he's barely told me anything about himself anyway.

"Oh yeah, we've heard all sorts." Marko butts in again, lifting an eyebrow at me as I feel my eyes widen.

"Yeah, David won't shut up about you." Paul chimes in, smirking at the platinum blonde behind me, who quickly tells him to shut up, though using much more colourful language to convey his point.

"L-like what?" Internally, I curse myself for stuttering again, knowing it's not helping my case at all.

Paul goes to respond, a smirk already pasted onto his face, only to be cut off by Dwayne.

"Nothing bad, don't worry." He confirms, looking over my head at David, who appears to send his friend a grateful glance, his icy blue eyes clouded with annoyance at the other two.

"Except that you're a bit quiet which I now see is totally true." Paul butts in again, chuckling and reaching over to tilt my head his way with one finger, admiring the deep red tinge of my cheeks, "You don't have to be. In fact, we know the perfect way to get you more...vocal."

At the insinuation behind his words, I flinch away from him, looking down as Marko and Paul erupt into fits of laughter, the two of them high-fiving each other triumphantly. A sharp crack and a grunt of pain informs me that Dwayne has once again delivered a whack around the back of each of their heads.

"Just shut up, will you? Show some respect." Dwayne scolds them, brow furrowed in irritation.

"Come on, (Y/n), let's go get some food." David finally says, having stayed quiet almost the entire time, except for the noises of anger that he let out every now and then, body becoming tenser and tenser behind me.

"Ok, sure." I agree, going to turn away from the others with a thankful smile at Dwayne, who seems the most controlled of all of them.

"Enjoy your bite to eat! Make sure you get something you can really sink your fangs into!" Marko calls after us, his laughter cut short by a screech of pain, Dwayne having finally stepped in, dragging the two troublemakers off by their ears. Beside me, David visibly stiffens, eyes closing momentarily, though I could've sworn I saw them flash yellow a second ago, the platinum blonde doing his best to remain calm as he directs me someplace else, clearly eager to get away from the others.

"I'm sorry, (Y/n), I wanted you to meet my friends tonight, but I didn't realise they'd behave so badly around you, though I guess I really should've seen it coming." David apologises, taking my hand in his as we walk, giving me a guilty look, "They're good friends when they're not being so inappropriate."

"It's fine, though I think they'll take some getting used to." I reassure him, squeezing his hand gently.

"I guess. That doesn't excuse their behaviour, though." He responds, frowning again, "I'm sorry, I should've warned you."

"About them being so physical, maybe, but not about them being typical friends. I'm sure I'll come to like them in time." I say to him, carefully coming to a halt beside the rear of one of the food stalls lining the Boardwalk, having figured something out, "That's what you were nervous about, wasn't it?"

"Hm? I wasn't nervous." David scoffs, smirking at me.

"You were! You were worried about how I'd react to your friends, weren't you?" I prompt him, crossing my arms over my chest with an unusual confidence I don't often feel.

"Of course I wasn't!" The blonde goes to argue, only to catch sight of my expression, rolling his eyes in defeat, "Fine, I was a bit concerned about how they'd act, and then about what you would think of them, but not a lot!"

"Sure, keep telling yourself that." I tease, squeaking when I suddenly find myself pinned against the wall behind me, his muscular body pressing into mine as he leans in close.

"Say that again, (Y/n)." He growls into my ear, his smooth voice making me shiver in anticipation as his breath fans hotly across my skin.

"Keep telling yourself-" I try to repeat myself, only to let out a quiet gasp of pleasure when he starts kissing at my neck, mouthing at my sweet spot as my hands snake around into his hair, his own gripping my waist, pulling my hips into his.

"What's wrong? Cat got your tongue?" David purrs against my jaw as he licks a stripe up the column of my neck, before he presses his lips against mine, deepening the kiss as soon as I reciprocate, knowing I won't be able to reply now, smirking against my lips in triumph.

What I didn't know (and wouldn't know until much later) is that he had made the boys swear to behave, only to feel a surge of possessiveness come over him when he sees Marko and Paul completely disregard their promises, now feeling the need to make it well known who I belong to, even if that means risking my dignity in public.