#So I just thought “I need to talk to someone” and Tumblred my way out because SM is friendly and calming
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inkandpaintleopard · 5 months ago
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While Pump DOES have a sleeping bag, not often than not Skid and Pump end up falling asleep in Skid's bed because they were playing video games watching videos together
They usually end up cuddled together under the blankets when this happens. Lila has MANY pictures of them like this, she finds it adorable
THANK YOU
THIS HEAVILY REMINDS ME OF MY SPOOKEEZ DREAM LAST NIGHT IT’S PERFECT
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lycanthian · 9 months ago
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i need to fuckign explode
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strawberrybyers · 2 years ago
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let me tell you as someone who survived pop music artists stan twitter or whatever it’s called, marvel twitter, game of thrones twitter, and bts twitter (i wasn’t really involved with stranger things twitter but i trust you guys when you say it’s terrible)— it’s a shit show over on that app. like when people say they don’t want twitter users here, they’re not saying it to be gatekeep-y or whatever. they’re saying it because they don’t want to deal with seeing or experiencing any harassment.
twitter thrives off of toxicity. i think you can definitely attempt to create a healthy space for yourself depending on what your interests are, but i imagine that’d be hard because even if you don’t interact with anyone, you’re still seeing others interact with people in a horrible way. i know that being a part of fandoms that are big always led to there being drama every single day and drove me away from even wanting to talk about my interests. people really do help curate the experience you have with whatever you’re a fan of and when the people are bullying, harassing, and being rude; you suddenly do not like that thing all that much anymore.
you really have to experience twitter to fully understand it in my opinion. there’s a certain way that it works and it becomes very cliquish/cultish and idk it sounds dramatic for sure but the ones who have been on twitter and are saying it’s a bad place understand 100%.
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witherbythesword · 4 months ago
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#when i was a kid I was kinda neglected and my parents didn't like me very much but whatever#in tv there would always be these talent#and they would stare little kids with they parents being THERE and PROUD#so in my kid brain i thought: alright so to better my situation i just need to get really good at something and then they'll care for me#and the only skill i had been complimented on before was drawing#so i started teaching myself drawing#birds because i liked them and plants because i thought my mother loved and later skeletons because i was emo lol#and i think how i am so perfectionist in my art (eventhough i try to be happy with just whatever i make these days)#and i think about that quote of suzanne riveca thats like:#(my art) has to be perfect it has to be irreproachable in every way to make up for it#to make up for the fact that it's me#and about that one tweet that went something lile#sometimes we strive for pervection in our art because we hope to one day create something that doesn't look like we made it#and how i love drawing and hat that knife against my throat that hinges my life on it being good#and how no matter what i do#I can't get rid of that sinking feeling that i always have to struggle and earn my place in someones life#even when i know it's not like that and thats just the mentally ill part of my brain being loud and dumb#Like i got so many issues under controll by now#many reason to be proud! and be positive about things getting better and my own strength#but some part of my brain is still that little girl alone in all the empty rooms#and i can't get her out of there#because the strength that girl needed to make it through is the same strength i need to help myself through the waves of the aftermath#like i feel like to heal i'd need to allow mysf to be weak but that prospect of not holding myself clenxhed like a fist is so scary#and also knowing how bad my brain can be who knowd what would happen lol#and I WISH not every therapist in my city that accepts patients was a weird nutjob#so i could talk to them about it rather than the tumblr tag#but this is the hand we've been given and it's the hand we need to hold or however that goes#a few days ago someone called me charming and that was very nice#tumblr still limiting the tags to 30 😔 how is a girl supppse to therapise herself in that economy????#whatever!!! i am shattering like glass but at least i have viddy games and cool people in my life that like me despite it all and music
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mildcicada · 7 months ago
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#U Have No Idea How Much I Miss Her.#i need to start actually drawinf again its been a hellish 6 months#its really easy to just fall out of the habit of it#i used to obsess over never being someone who just suddenly stopped drawing for weeks/months#it scared me. like a core part of my identity would have to change for that to happen or would be changed by that happening#and then once i didn't draw and wasn't drawing i felt like i needed something to violently change about myself to get me to start doing it#again. but i didn't need that i just drew something again and that was it. like that stretch of time didn't happen#drawing is just an activity you can choose to do or not do and there are no consequences for whatever decision you chose to take but it felt#so serious to me it is like i viewed it like death#which i was right about in a way but mostly in how death is just a thing that happens and that it wont be that sudden and insane#you will just be and then not be just like how you weren't and now are. its just like me drawing or not drawing lol#but that comic of ht papyrus by jnpie where he's looking at the puzzles he used to make and wondering if he'll ever do that again. or if he#wants to. its like that feeling. it always sticks in my mind#i have like a fear of thinking about when i will no longer care about something i care about now and its so weird when. realize i stopped#wanting to do something and caring about it and. i feel nothing on account of no longer caring about it lol. but i know that past me#is currently looking forward at me now and terrified. this is unrelated to that comic a lot but its like. thinking about how i will change#words#mine#IM NOT TAGGING THE ART bc i wanna actually finish some of these pieces tbh and like they are just the backdrop for my thoughts...#feels so hashtag tumblr to talk to yourself about some vague ass feelings or situation that no one else will look at ugh thats like#The tumblr experience. but i love reading other's personal posts and tags though..
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onlythebravest · 2 years ago
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#tw sick parent figure + tw sick parent when i was younger (sick-sick)#seriously don't read this it's just me rambling#i just write it here bc i don't want to bother people by saying the same thing over and over and over#bc it's nothing new to be said. i just need to get it out yet another time#i hope this drowns in all the louis posts so i can just send this into the void 😂#i've been home for less than 24 hours and i already don't want to be here. it already sucks#i guess in a way it's good bc now i can help but it really sucks and idk how to handle everything#and on top of that my therapist continues to be sick so i don't even have someone to talk to about all of this and it just sits in my head#he is already back at the hospital which makes me just remember all the times my mom went in and out of the hospital when i was younger#well good thing here is that they have something that they now can treat even if they don't know it that's actual cause of not#but doesn't help with all my thoughts about how bad shit is and how it reminds me of my mom and how i can't handle any of this#and am instead rambling in some tags in a tumblr post#i wish i could just shut down all the emotions until he's all better and we don't have to worry anymore and everything is fine again#bc this sucks#i don't want to do this anymore#and i'm sure it's barely begun#bc why would it be easily treatable? that would be a miracle and i don't believe in miracles#life sucks and i really wish it didn't#if you’re down here then that’s impressive bc I wouldn’t be able to read this since it’s just a block of text without any real sentences 😂#and yeah this is just me screaming into the void#don't worry about it i'll be fine
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ribosomeraisin · 7 months ago
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hi it’s me with another vent post in tags. happy out of touch thursday
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gaystardykeco · 1 year ago
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being miserable for only reasons that are entirely my own fault is actually so funny like if this was a tv show itd absolutely be one of the ones where the main character (me) is such a piece of shit causing all their own problems that the audience gets joy from seeing them reap the consequences and suffer
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cuddleprofiler · 1 month ago
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FAINTING & FEVER - When you confess your deep buried feelings to your boss in your fever.
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Summary: Hiding a fever? Check. Passing out? Check. Confessing your feelings to your boss? Wait woah?
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x reader, BAU x platonic!reader
Genre: Fluff
Warnings: fever, fainting, rest is good I guess.
Word Count: 3.8k
A/N: This was supposed to be platonic but I didn't feel like it is romantic :) This is my first time writing any non-platonic work. All the pics I have inserted are more clear when clicked if you want to see (Tumblr did something). Positive Criticism is welcomed.
"So, what are you ladies up to tonight?" Morgan asked while driving, his focus on the road. You'd just finished a case, and as usual, Morgan was eager to make plans before another case thrust you back into the world's horrors.
"Well," JJ began with a sigh, eyebrows raised, "I'm going to spend the whole day resting with my boys." She finished with her radiant smile.
"What about you, Prentiss?" Morgan glanced at Emily in the passenger seat.
"No plans yet, but who knows? I might have something by the time we land."
"L/N?" Derek called out when he realized you hadn't answered, lost in your own world.
You sat beside Spencer, staring out the window, oblivious to your surroundings. The heat you felt was consuming every coherent thought.
"L/N?"
"Huh? What did you say?" you asked, turning your head so quickly that JJ and Spencer wondered how you didn't get whiplash. Your voice remained calm and soft.
"You okay?" Spencer asked, his hazel eyes filled with concern.
"Why wouldn't I be, Spencer?" you replied, mustering a small smile to maintain your façade.
"You just seem...down," he commented, studying you intently. You gave him another small smile, shook your head, and winced. Your head felt as if it had been struck by an invisible hammer. Spencer either didn't notice your wince or chose not to comment.
"You up for some fun tonight?" Morgan asked again, though you were barely aware.
"What fun?" you frowned. The way he said "fun" made you think it might not be the kind you'd enjoy.
"Seriously, sweet girl? You're spending way too much time with Reid. I'm talking about bars, drinks, and if you get lucky, then maybe—" Morgan started with a Cheshire grin, while your eyes widened.
"No," you said in a high-pitched tone, embarrassed at the thought of hooking up with a random guy when you already loved someone.
"What do you mean, 'no'? Come on. We don't get many days off, L/N. You should enjoy them when you can."
"Morgan, I can't," you said, shifting uncomfortably.
"And why is that, sweet girl?"
"Hey! Garcia will take offense if you call someone else 'sweet girl,'" you said with a smile, appreciating his use of a nickname for you.
"Nah. My baby girl will never be offended by this, and you're not just someone else," he replied confidently.
"But answer the question, sweet girl," he prompted, aware you were avoiding it. He assumed your hesitation was due to your reluctance to go out, knowing how you and Reid felt about drinking and socializing.
"I've got some work to do, Morgan. Also, I'm tired," you said, leaning your head back.
Morgan's expression changed instantly.
"Go straight home when we land, Y/N, not to Hotch's office. Whatever files you have to work on can wait. If I didn't know him better, I'd say he's making you do overtime."
"Exactly. Hotch will understand, and there's no need to tire yourself out," Spencer added softly.
Their concern warmed your heart. "Of course, gentlemen," you replied, amusing the others.
The conversation drifted back to their plans while you gazed out the window, watching amoeba-shaped clouds float slowly across the sky. The view was therapeutic, but you didn't tell them how awful you were feeling.
When you woke up that morning, it felt as if hell had descended upon Earth just for you. Your muscles ached, protesting and begging you to return to bed, but you couldn't. Lives were at stake, a case needed solving. Now, the muscle pain had given way to a headache and constant zoning out.
You longed to get home as soon as possible, yearning for your fluffy blankets to engulf you completely, save for your head. You hoped your phone might end up in a ditch for the day, allowing you to remain in your cozy cocoon until you felt well enough to face the world—and potential case calls—again.
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Soon, you arrived at the airstrip, where Emily and JJ surrounded you.
"So, where's your mind wandering today?" Emily asked with a mischievous grin. Before you could answer, JJ chimed in.
"In dreams of Hotch, of course. Right, Y/N?" You quickly shushed her, glancing around to ensure no one had overheard.
"JJ, Emily, we're at the airstrip," you whispered urgently. "Someone might hear you. It's supposed to be a secret. Sometimes I think you and Garcia are determined to let Hotch find out." You began trudging toward the plane, feeling drained.
They both laughed and high-fived.
"We do want you two together," Emily said.
"You should tell him yourself," JJ added. "Besides, if he overhears by accident, it'll only speed up your love life."
"By the way, Y/N, will you only go out with us if Hotch is there too?" Emily teased.
"Guys!" you groaned as they laughed.
Your crush on Hotch had started early in your tenure, initially based on his looks. But it deepened into something more profound, to the point where his well-being affected you deeply. You felt terrified when he faced dangerous situations. That's when you knew you were in trouble.
There was no way he'd fall for someone who could barely speak to him. You had your reasons for avoiding him. The days leading up to this decision were hellish. Never had you stumbled over your words as much as you did then. And what did he do?
He always gave you a patient look and nodded softly, encouraging you to speak your mind. It was manageable until you started losing yourself in his eyes or staring at his face constantly. After that, you ensured you were never alone with him except when working on case files. You began doing this so he could go home early and rest, reasoning that a few extra files wouldn't impact your time.
You were startled from your reverie by the memory of Garcia suggesting that Hotch might like you too. You still don't believe her, but a girl could hope.
"If it gets too much, I want you to pull out."
"Sir?" you asked, confused, looking up from your gun at your boss, who was surveying the team preparing to ambush the unsub's house.
"Everyone has off cases, L/N, but with time, most of us have learned to deal with it. Still, we pull ourselves out when needed. You're still new. So, pull out if necessary. Do you understand me?" he said, now looking at you, his gaze sweeping over your shorter form. You looked up at him intently, lost in his eyes until he raised an eyebrow. You could have sworn you saw his eyes soften slightly.
"Yes, sir."
"Call me Hotch, Y/N." With that, he walked towards the rest of the team as you hurried to catch up.
Back at the FBI building, you dashed to Garcia's lair. She was your first friend, and you both had a tendency to ramble about various topics. Sometimes Reid joined in. As soon as you saw her, you hugged her. Hugging Garcia was like therapy—you could feel your worries, guilt, and other negative emotions leaving your body. You felt yourself relax, your body lighter. You called it "Garcia magic”! It was an added bonus that Garcia was fond of physical affection.
When you told her about Hotch's words and your feeling that he was worried and all other incidents where he acted the same—though you thought that was impossible—she flashed her beaming smile, all her white teeth showing. Her eyes, however, held the amusement of knowing something you didn't.
"I didn't know sweet cheeks, he cares for you this much." Garcia mused, clearly pleased by what you'd shared.
This much? And what do you mean?" you asked, your curiosity evident.
"Hmm hmm. He looks at you the same way Will looks at JJ. He's so soft with you and he isn't like this with anybody. Maybe except Jack of course."
“Garcia there’s no way in hell he likes me. Maybe he was trying to be sweet.” you asked her trying not to get your hopes up.
This is a paradox. You are sure. Damn sure! Garcia began laughing while you gave her an incredulous look. She didn’t stop until you threw a teddy at her. “My sweet sweet girl, Hotch is never sweet with anyone. Ask Emily about it if you are unsure but nope nada in my so many years of being at BAU, he’s never sweet with anyone.”
"Maybe you are overthinking this Garcia. Hotch and I don't even know each other.”, you mumbled looking at your hands in your lap.
“That is an argument I will have with you on another day but what I'm saying is that Hotch likes you.", she says with a small almost sad smile.
"If you want you can observe him. You're a profiler baby. Yow will know.", she added gleefully.
Henceforth, you observed Hotch as profiling team members was off-limit. He had a tendency to smile at you softly and he didn’t offer others the same amount of options that he did to you , but you attributed this to being new. You were certain he'd show his more authoritative side once you were no longer considered the newest member. Definitely!
Lost in these thoughts, you suddenly felt your vision blur and your surroundings distort.
"Whoa! You okay?" Emily asked as she grabbed your forearm, while JJ held the other. They exchanged concerned looks when you didn't answer immediately. You shook your head slightly and replied,
"Yeah, yeah. Just slipped."
They didn't seem convinced but didn't press further.
"Be careful," JJ said, patting your shoulder.
"Yeah, of course," you mumbled, trying to regain your composure.
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Hotch and Rossi chatted as they walked, their conversation drifting from Jack's football to other topics. Before they knew it, they'd arrived at the airstrip. As Hotch boarded the plane, he froze in surprise. You were seated next to his usual spot—an unexpected sight, given your habit of avoiding him outside of group settings or work situations. Your presence there felt nothing short of miraculous.
Not wanting to give Rossi a chance to tease him, Hotch quickly sat beside you. He was certain you hadn't noticed his arrival, as you were deeply engrossed in the case report—something you rarely worked on during flights.
His attention shifted back to Rossi when the older agent began discussing plans for a pasta dinner. From the corner of his eye, Hotch caught you glancing up, offering both him and Rossi a small smile before burying yourself in the file again. It was odd, considering the report wasn't due for days.
He didn't want to finish it quickly, knowing an empty home awaited him. No one would be there to greet him—just silent walls. Jack was on vacation with Jessica's family for the next few days, leaving Hotch alone in the city. He stole another quick glance at you, resisting the urge to look more often.
Hotch was sure he would never fall in love again after Hayley. He loved her from such a young age and so much that loving someone else felt betraying the love he had bestowed upon Hayley all those years. Even after getting a divorce, he didn't stop loving her completely. Sometimes, he liked to believe they separated not because they fell out of love, but because their love was so intense that their arguments became too painful. However, he knew this wasn't the reality. He sighed and pulled out his file.
His thoughts soon drifted to you. Lately, contemplating love inevitably led him to think of you. Sometimes you don't know what hit you until it does. Falling in love with you was the same. He was falling in and never realised until the day he got a letter. From you.
Hotch had slowly fallen in love with you. That was the truth of his life, he stayed away from for a long time. How could he stay away when your every action seemed to win his heart anew? Each time he learned something new about you, he fell a little deeper.
You were a sweet addition to the team. It didn't mean you were all the time sunshine. Everyone learnt that the hard way. He mentally chuckled at the fight you and Morgan had over dark chocolate to the extent you were ready to beat him black and blue. However, your sweet gestures towards everyone on the team always warmed his heart.
He reminded himself to remain professional. After all, he was on a plane with a group of profilers who could decipher his feelings in minutes if given the chance.
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"L/N, can you tell me about the—"
"L/N?" Hotch called out again, surprised you didn't hear him the first time. Still, you didn't reply. Rossi also looked up.
"Y/N? Y/N!" He said, touching your shoulder.
"Yeah, yeah. What happened?" You looked like a deer caught in headlights, making both Hotch and Rossi confused.
"Nothing happened. I was just asking you about the case," he replied, looking at you. You were looking...different. It was as if every laugh and joy had been drained from your life.
"I'll be right back," you said, standing up and moving before Hotch had a chance to stop you.
The moment you stood up, you knew you shouldn't have done that. You were far better sitting down. Now the pounding in your head intensified, along with the feeling of being shaken up to the point where you could see everything oscillating. You tried to keep yourself still, hoping your surroundings would become normal.
The next thing you knew, everything went black.
Hotch saw you swaying and moved instinctively. He caught you, one hand on your waist, the other on your shoulder, trying to keep you up while you were dead weight. However, it wasn't as easy as it seemed in the movies.
"Y/N? Y/N. Hey, wake up!"
"Y/N!" He squeezed your body against him.
However, his yelling got him nowhere. You didn't respond, lying still in his arms as if you were taking a nap. Hotch would have believed it if he hadn't seen you go down in front of his eyes.
"Y/N," he called out again, softly this time, yet the response was the same. He swept your hair back from your face.
Unable to keep you up, he gently lowered both of you onto the aisle. He moved his hands to your shoulders, gently shaking you, but you showed no sign of waking up.
He didn't notice anyone else until he felt a hand on his shoulder. He looked up and saw Rossi sitting beside him, looking alarmed by the happenings. Morgan was above your head. The rest of the team was also hovering.
"What happened, man?" Morgan asked while taking the sweater Reid offered and putting it under your head.
Hotch didn't answer. He himself didn't know what was wrong with you. One minute, you were standing and the next plummeting down like the apple which led to the discovery of gravity. His hand went to your cheeks, where he felt the heat radiating. His frown appeared and deepened as he touched your forehead.
"She's burning up!" Hotch said worriedly, still keeping his tone full of calmness while his heart was trying to beat out of his chest. Having a fever is one thing but passing out from it is entirely another. He couldn't help but feel the small burning sensation in his chest at the thought of being ill, even if it was a fever.
You could hear people talking, but why would there be people at your home? You scrunched your face and blinked your eyes multiple times before fully opening them. Everything was blurry at first, but soon it became clear, along with the horrible pounding in your head. You tried to sit up, but a firm pair of arms pushed you back.
"Hey Bella, don't try to get up. Stay still."
"Wha-what happened?"
"You fainted," Hotch said. The rest of them had dispersed, knowing Hotch would take great care of you and that a crowd wouldn't help much.
"I don't feel good," you groaned, your hand massaging your head.
"Yeah, I gathered that much. Tell me what's exactly wrong, L/N?" Hotch had your hand in his, rubbing it softly to ease the pain in any way he could.
"I don't feel good," you mumbled again with half-closed eyes. You were mostly disoriented from what Hotch could figure out.
"You have a fever."
"I do?"
It was taking you time to gather what was happening. He blamed the fainting and fever. It took you time, but you slowly opened your eyes fully when you noticed Hotch still sitting at the edge of the sofa. He still held your hand, and your legs were on his lap. Being in touch with him felt like second nature; you didn't even notice until you opened your eyes. You quickly tried to pull back your legs and hand, but Hotch stopped you with his hold.
"Don't move so much, Y/N. Relax," his voice soft and calming, as always.
You sat in silence for the rest of the journey, which wasn't very long. You were clutching onto his forearm as he helped you sit up to go home. When you came outside the plane,
"Hotch, I can go home by myself," you began, your voice small, hoping to regain some of the dignity you lost after fainting in front of your entire team.
"Y/N, you can't stand straight, and you want to drive home by yourself?" Hotch asked with a raised eyebrow.
"There are other ways to be suicidal than this, sweet girl," Morgan quipped, walking beside you, not that you noticed. You looked up at him and then at Hotch, concern shining in both of their eyes.
"I'm not joking," you huffed.
"Neither are we," Morgan said.
"Y/N, it's final. I'm taking you home," Hotch ordered. That's what it felt like to you.
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Hotch had an arm around your waist, supporting you as your body threatened to collapse. He hurried towards your apartment, aware of your rising fever. He couldn't give you medicine without food, but he was grateful for your unfiltered speech—it revealed the extent of your discomfort.
"You know, Hotch?" you began as he fumbled with the door. You leaned against the wall for support.
"Dahlias are my favourite flowers. They symbolize change, dignity, and elegance."
"They're native to Mexico, right?" he replied as you entered the apartment.
"Yeah! You know about them?" you asked, turning your face abruptly.
"Easy, honey. No sudden moves," he cautioned. "And yes, I've picked up a few facts over the years."
"I've always loved them. So colourful, bright, and beautiful," you laughed softly.
Hotch had never heard you speak so freely. He found himself enchanted by your voice, certain you could rival Reid in flower trivia.
After settling you on the sofa, Hotch fetched water, fruit, and medicine. You tossed your shoes aside and reluctantly took the pills, groaning as you slumped back.
"You should change into something more comfortable," Hotch suggested, removing his own shoes.
You looked at him, startled. Realizing his phrasing, he quickly clarified, "I mean, you should put on some comfy clothes."
At his insistence, you changed. When you returned, Hotch had shed his coat and tie, his shirt partially unbuttoned.
"Aren't you going home?" you asked, confused.
"I'll stay tonight, in case you need anything."
"There's no need, Hotch. You must be exhausted from the case. Go home and rest. I'll be fine."
"Y/N, it's better if someone's with you tonight. You fainted on the plane. I wouldn't be able to relax not knowing how you're doing," he admitted, his voice soft.
You smiled at his thoughtfulness and curled up on the sofa with a blanket and pillow. You both decided to watch Star Wars.
Partway through the movie, you turned to Hotch, staring intently.
"You know, Hotch?"
"Yes?"
"I love you. Like, really, really love you," you said with a lopsided smile.
Hotch froze, completely still. He hadn't been this motionless since he first held Jack, afraid of hurting his newborn son. He never imagined you reciprocated his feelings, but he knew if he didn't get the conversation going right now, he not going to know about your feelings when you are not loopy due to medicine.
���Yea?”
"Mm-hmm. You're so wonderful and adorable and just... so cute. Yeah, you're intimidating at work, but the rest of the time? Totally cute."
"Oh, am I?"
Though your tongue was loosened by the medicine, you were more lucid than you let on. Having suppressed these feelings for so long, you couldn't stop now that you'd started. You wanted to tell him everything—him about all those feelings that you shouldn't have about him but you do, how couldn't help but fall for him slowly and every day seeing him made your day.
He was so handsome! His pretty dark brown chocolate-coloured eyes are swoon-worthy. Whenever you look into them, you feel hypnotized, unable to look away from them but not being present in the time; you often find yourself lost in them, forgetting his words as you gaze at him. Right now, he was looking directly at you, and you were drowning in his gaze.
How does he not realize the effect he has when he looks at someone like this?
Hotch's smile grew with each word you spoke.
"You're so handsome, ridiculously handsome. Have you seen yourself under that table lamp? You look like some movie hero poring over case files."
He blushed and glanced away at your flood of compliments. You cupped his face, turning it back to you, your eyes wide and intent. His smile made your frown melt into the biggest grin he'd ever seen on you. You looked beautiful.
"I just really like you, but I know you don't like me," you said, your voice small.
He frowned at your words.
"I love you too, honey, but I'll give you the full answer when you're well enough to remember it. Word for word," he replied softly.
You squealed with delight.
"You aren't just saying this to spare my feelings, right?" you mumbled a few moments later.
He cradled your face in his hands. "I would never say such a thing just to spare someone's feelings, Y/N. I love you. More than you can imagine."
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Your questioning continued throughout the movie, but you refused to turn it off.
"You must have had many admirers in college. How many girlfriends did you have?" you asked, your head resting on his shoulder while his hand on your waist pulled you closer. Both of you kept your eyes on the TV.
"I only had one."
"No, you're lying. You're far too handsome to have had only one girlfriend your entire life."
'You can become the second.'
"What did you say?"
"I didn't say anything, sweetheart."
"Did you just call me sweetheart?"
"You're imagining things, L/N. It's a common symptom of high fever. Of course, I didn't call you sweetheart, honey."
"Oh, but I—you just called me—"
"What?"
"Never mind. I must be imagining it."
"Yes, you're definitely imagining things."
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tellafairy · 2 months ago
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thoughts on shifting + manifesting with ease. (as someone who's shifted many times, alongside manifesting)
coming back to this side of tumblr after spending years away from it has made me realized how many of you are truly the problem, it might sound kinda harsh but really. so many of you ask the same questions over and over again.. "but HOW do i do it?" "how do i shift" "how do i manifest" JUST DO IT. stop looking for signs, stop looking for methods or "cheat codes". just do it man.
your mind is so powerful and it actually kinda irritates me how many of you doubt it, just because it "seems to easy". you don't understand how you've been manipulated by society to not see your power. how have you been on loa social media, shifting social media, for soooo long — yet still don't see it?? let me tell you..
the moment i got off social media, the moment i took time to erase everything in my head and stop overthinking everything, was the moment everything came to me. i already had it, i just needed to stop telling myself i didn't.
it took me barely any time to get used to convincing myself i had everything i wanted, i shifted to my desired realities, and everything worked out in my favour. AFFIRMING IS ALL YOU NEED. I AM YELLING AT YOU. JUST AFFIRM.
really, please, affirm. the routine is so simple.
1. any bad thought is instantly turned positive.
ex: "i really want her waist"
to
"am i stupid ... i have her waist.. tbh mine even looks a little better.. am i crazy?? like actually? this must be a glitch or something cause my waist is practically identical to hers.. i literally love my waist"
exaggerate, say what you need to say to erase the negativity.
2. it's yours, so act like it..
ex: talk about ur DR normally. it's your reality, not a fantasy land you made up in a dream. ITS REAL. it's a reality. for example, i'd watch videos of my s/o in this reality, and speak about our lives in my dr. "i can't wait to see __ tonight... god i love __, it's so nice hanging out with them everyday.. wow they look so pretty in this video — i'm so lucky their mine". it's natural, they're yours aren't they? exactly, so act like it.. this is used the exact same way when manifesting..
you see someone with something you want? thinking of something you wanna do? something you wanna be? ... it's urs... so can you act like it?? like whyre u feeling sad someone else got a job promotion 😹😹 you literally got a better one ...
3. that's literally it
you don't need a fancy method (although it can give u some peace of mind.. let's be real, a lot of methods set y'all back and make you overwhelmed, blocking ur beliefs and making everything seem harder). you literally just need to live. tell yourself it's done, over and over again. nothing matters. it's done, it's yours, you have it, you're happy and fulfilled. other peoples sucess should really mean nothing to you negatively. it shouldn't make you stressed, shouldn't make you feel behind.. why would it when you have everything, you can do everything, go anywhere, and you can be anything.
it'll seem like manifesting blogs and shifting blogs just repeat the same things.. which is true, they do, because i'm telling you there's nothing more to it than what you've already read. it is that easy. all it takes is your mind. decide, and tell yourself.
as i said before, it took me barely anytime to switch my mindset once i actually started focusing on myself, my journey and not every body else's results. repeating stuff to yourself WORKS. repeating is literally ALL i did. choose what i want, told myself it's mine in any way i could describe it. and there, it's mine. ive shifted to many different realities, along side gaining a better life in this one after years of convincing myself there was nothing for me. if i can break out of the cycle, trust me you can too. i cannot describe how desperate i was at the beginning, how long i took in false info and wasted time on methods all while doubting every single thing.
so why don't you believe it? you'll sit there and tell yourself over and over again that you're ugly, or broke, or friendless... but you won't tell urself that you've shifted? that you have your dream body...? girl okay i guess....
once you realize nothing besides your mind truly matters, is when you'll be free with yourself. circumstances don't matter, past feelings don't matter, doubts don't matter, your mind is all you need.
yes this is just loa explained longer, that's the point of the post because some of u still can't get it in ur heads
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coelakanths · 2 years ago
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guys i;am goingt o throw up
#d/ngt rebl/g dear lord. btw#imfreaking the fuck out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1#heres the thing ok. ive been freaking out for the past two days over something that is....... very much not worth freaking out over#like. the catastrophe in my brain is so blaringly obviously untrue. like that would literally never happen + i look like a dumbass for even#thinking it. its so dumb im not even going to say what i was thinking becayse its so stupid and embarrassing#when u take into account the context that makes it so fucking obvious that what im thinking is definitely the opposite of the case#like the people involved here would not act the way they are acting if they secretly had it out to get me or hated me or whatever.#THAT BEING SAID !#god idk whats wrong with me this is wiggingme out so bad#SORRY FOR BEING CRAZY VAGUE LMAO.... LITTLE TOO PERSONAL FOR TUMBLR IG BUT ALSO I CANT TALK ABT IT WITH YM FRIENDS BC ITS SO EMBARRASSING#i think i just need someone to look me in the eyes and call me a dumbass. like im fucking stupid and making shit up. BECAUSE I AM#and i KNOW i am i know so fucking well that im making shit up and being freaked over THE OPPOSITE OF SOMETHING TO FREAK OVER#LIKE LITERAL OPPOSITE. LIKE ITS SO FUCKING STUPID#AND YET HERE I AM. STILL FREAKING OUT#this will all be ok tomorrow like its going to all be fine tomorrow but until then i will be worrying so bad. like so bad. aughhhghghh#and it sucks bc now its bleeding over into everything. hard to do my hw + make plans for an assignment and im so stressed abt it as a resul#like everythign is getting me bc of this hanging over my head. i just found out that a scheduling conflict i thought i had is actually fine#bc one of the things is next week and the other is this week#AND THAT SHOULD BE RELIEVING BUT ITS MAKING ME MORE STRESSED!!!!!!11 WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#this is literally so bad. like this is so bad . like i should not be so hung up over literally nothing. a lack of thing. dear god#AUGHHHGHGHHHHHHHWHWHWHWHHW#OK. DOING MY HOMEWORK NOW. NOT THINKING ABOUT IT.
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iiotic · 1 month ago
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JEALOUSY
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in which, you, meet the famous traveller and her companion, offering them your help as a guide in natlan, however your friend and secretly crush, doesn't seem to like it very much.
before you read -> jealousy, stalking, ajaw, mutual pining sorta, generally fluff, swearing, poorly written, short, cringe, female reader, based of an request (thank you anon!!)
word count: 1.6k
the first time i wrote it tumblr decided to delete the whole shit, thank you tumblr we all say in unison. that's why it's kinda worse now (rushed) help.
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"what are we?"
the question lingered in your mind as kinich, once again, took you out on a walk. you didn't have the confidence to ask him that though, no. whenever you tried to ask him that simple, yet so important question, the words would never leave your mouth. it was like your mind was telling you to not do it, or else you'd ruin everything.
that you'd ruin all of your hardwork of becoming friends with kinich, best friends even you'd say but you doubt that he'd ever call you that. the countless nights that you spend sleepless because you were thinking about him. his eyes, his smile, his hair, his sense of humour, his bluntness, his confidence; everyting about him was so..
you gasped, snapping out of your thoughts as a bird flew right in front of your face. you stopped in your tracks, trying to calm yourself from the jumpscare. right infront of you, the beautiful landscape of natlan, with the sun rising from its slumber. yet you didn't stop to admire the sunset, nor the beautiful landscape, your attention was fully focused on the boy who seemed confused why you suddenly stopped, his yellow eyes shining even more than normally.
"are you alright?" kinich asked, walking over to you with a worried look. he put the back of his hand on your forehead. "you don't look very well, you're all warm and red."
"oh. no, im perfectly fine! just a little tired from the walk." you chuckled nervously, putting the whole teatric.
"pheraps we should take a break? c'mon" he said, gesturing you to follow him to the nearby rocks. the place of resting he chose was literally perfect, of course the rocks were hard as rocks are but there were trees next to them, blocking you from the sun.
you sat down with a heavy sigh, looking at your surroundings trying to stop yourself from thinking about the boy sitting next to you, nothing new, nothing interesting that would peak your interest. maybe kinich wouldn't mind if you rested your eyes for a bit.. just close them, relax, take a quick nap.
turns out he didn't mind, as he didn't wake you up; the almighty k'uhul ajaw did by his rather loud complaining. he was just in time out a second ago. you always thought that putting him in "time out" was silly. how annoying can he be? a lot, you soon found out.
"I do NOT have to waste my PRECIOUS TIME being here and doing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING." he yelled, some strangers heads turning in your direction. embarrassing.
soon enough you made your way home, trying to ignore the voices of an annoying ancient dragon. as you were walking something or rather someone caught your attention.
"hey, who's that?" you said to kinich, pointing in the direction of strangers. "they don't look like they would be from around here."
"oh? that's the traveller and her companion, have you not met them?" he'd respond
"no, have you?"
you don't know how or why but you found yourself next to the strangers, introducing yourself in a second. if kinich knew them and didn't talk badly about them then they must be pretty cool. plus you needed friends, as you didn't know much people you liked here.
your mind telling you to go back, away from them because that's fucking weird, why would a random stranger come up to you with a creepy big smile and start introducing youself and rambling like a fool, but your heart was telling you that maybe just maybe they didn't find you as weird and let you accompany them just for some time.
and as it turns out they didn't find you as weird!! hurray or something. they told you how they just showed up here being here for roughly two days. you told them that you can guide them through natlan as they didn't seem to know the territory very well, they agreed but told you that they've been around the people of the springs as mualani already showed them around. oh? so they know mualani, nice.
you failed to notice the slight frown on kinichs face, what happened to your time alone when he wasn't doing commissions?
soon enough, about another two days later you finished showing them around. now, you sat in a nice restaurant next to a big window, laughing.
"yeah, it was so fun!!" you said with a bright smile, you were just happy to find someone who seemed to enjoy your presence as much as you enjoyed their. however in your head you felt like you forgot something, something important to you, something that you missed.
in the open, behind some trees stood kinich, seemingly observing you, smiling, you were smiling. at whom? the traveller and her companion, paimon. he knew that they were trustworthy but did they really deserve your smile? your smile which is brighter than the sun, shooing away the dark clouds when he was feeling under the weather?
the nonchalant, normally calm kinich was jealous? impossible. those were the annoying words from his even more annoying dragon.
"noo but seriouslyyy are we just going to stand there and do nothing? I'm bored!! it just proves the creep that you are, a stalker. I don't even know how they can put up with y-" the almighty k'uhul ajaw got cut off by his "owner" by him making him go in time out. "HEY WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE Doing"
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kinich didn't know what he was doing, was it on impulse? as much as he didn't want to admit it he knew that ajaw was right. he was jealous. by the way you smiled at them, to the fact that you hardly were spending any time with him anymore. he knew that it was just for some time, until the traveller will go to the next stop on their journey, yet still he couldn't help his actions.
now, he stood in front of your front door to your house. some not so cheap flowers in his hands, rainbow roses from fontaine, they were expensive it was unbelievable, but he just wanted everything to go perfect.
he knocked, heard footsteps inside, immediately regret his decision. the atmosphere was tense, awkward as you opened the door to kinich just looking at you with flowers in his hands, not saying anything, it wasn't like him at all.
"are those for.. me?" you asked, almost pleaded silently him that yes they were indeed for you, and how fucking stupid can you be of course they were for you, you fucking clueless moron. that would be the words spoken by ajaw if he wasn't locked out right now.
all he did was shove the flowers in your hands, clearly avoiding your gaze and breathing out a quick "yes"
"oh, these are lovely, thank you." you said with slightly flushed cheeks, your fingertips dragging at one of the pedals on the flower. "do you want to come in?.." you asked awkwardly
he nodded eagerly in response, now stepping a foot in your house. you closed the door behind you, asking him what does he want to do now. you looked up to see him already looming over you.
"you know, you haven't really been paying attention to me lately. I can fix that.."
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© 2024 iiotic. — do not steal, translate or repost any of my content onto any other platform
definitely one of my least favourite works, the ending was rushed because as I said tumblr decided to delete the fucking whole thingihmtgkdimtweaking
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highvern · 9 months ago
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Work Me Out
Pairing: Kim Mingyu x fem!reader
Genre: Smut, 18+
Warnings: working out, flirting, touching, almost car sex, making out, breast play, fingering, oral, face sitting, multiple sex positions, big dick mingyu, protected sex (gasp!), strength kink, dirty talk, choking, spanking :) lover boy gyu as always. let me know if i missed anything!
Length: ~5k
Note: y'all thought cheol rot was bad but the OG bias wrecker is back. dont come at me for gym terminology i go by vibes. replaced my gym crush with mingyu and this is what happened <3 i have a bonus/pt 2 in the drafts too but I'll wait to post it bc too much muscle pig mingyu is bad for the soul... and the [redacted]
to the anon that sent me a seok ask forever ago about his arms, im sorry i used it in this fic. but know i have a seok fic with exactly what you asked for in the works rn. everyone say thank you anon.
@bbychocolat do not hit my line about mingyu for at least 24 business hours i need to recover
Remember: Tumblr runs on reblogs and I run on validation in the tags and comments :)
read part II
read more here
This blog is intended for 18+ only! Minors/blank blogs will be blocked!
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Figuring out the ins and outs of a new gym isn’t easy but it isn’t impossible. Go too early and you’re surrounded by creepy men old enough to be your grandfather. Right after work is a sure way to experience hoards of gym bros crowding around machines like they own them. 
So you go as late as possible. 
Only a handful of people are dispersed through the large space. A few run on the treadmills lined on the catwalk of the second floor, several switch through different weights in front of the mirrors. You make your way through the maze of equipment towards the leg press; your final sets before you can go home and wash away the grime of the day.
Or you would if someone wasn’t occupying the one machine you need.
Peeping your head around, you notice a black backpack and matching water bottle on the ground. You glance around, unable to find a clear owner since the next closest person is halfway across the gym doing a different exercise.
Would it be that rude to take the machine out from under someone if they’re not even using it? You could probably get in all your sets before the person even came back if you moved quickly.
You wait a few minutes. How embarrassing would it be to have the mystery person walk back up the second you sat down? But after five minutes pass and no one emerges to claim the spot, you set about changing the weights out.
And just when you slip into the seat, you look up and find someone approaching.
He’s tall, he’s handsome, and he’s barely ten feet away. Your saving grace is that he hasn’t spotted you yet thanks to his phone. 
But that doesn’t last long.
“Oh! Sorry! Were you using this machine?” You ask, trying to sound cordial. 
“It’s okay!” He smiles at you. “Do you need it?”
Yes.
“No, I can find something else to do.” 
You rise to do just that when he stops you with a shrug.
“I don’t mind sharing.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, I take long breaks between my sets anyway so it’s no big deal.”
So that’s where he went.
“Okay, thanks.”
“No problem.”
He moves to lean against the wall, face buried in his phone once again as you work through your set. Honestly you think he forgot you were even there until you start standing up and he pushes off his perch. 
Exchanging polite smiles, you skirt around him and snag your water bottle before occupying the same spot against the painted bricks. You try not to be a creep but watching the way the muscles in his legs bulge and coil with each rep is impossible to look away from. Especially when there’s just so much to look at.
He racks up twelve reps with ease and switches back off with you before wandering out of sight.
You work through two of your sets before he comes teetering back. 
“I tried putting it back to your weight.” You laugh, sipping from your water bottle.
“Three forty? Ouch.”
“What? Should I have made it lighter?”
“Try heavier. Like four hundred.”
“My sincerest apologies.” You mock, placing your hand over your heart. “I’ll remember that next time.”
He laughs again before slipping back into the seat and working through the motions.
This time you don’t bother hiding the way you watch him over your phone. He looks good, it’d be a waste not to watch the swell of his chest or the stretch of his thighs. The gym shorts and snug black t-shirt only exacerbate how cut his physique is. 
And if he makes a comment you can always twist your not so subtle gawking into a compliment about his form.
When he finishes his set again, he snags his bag and water bottle off the ground before turning to you. “All yours. Have a good night.”
“Yeah, you too.”
And he’s gone.
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Over the next few weeks, you learn mystery man works out at the same time you. He’s there when you arrive and remains when you leave after an hour and a half of sweating and gasping like a dying fish, only absent on Wednesdays when you manage the most last luster workouts of your life. The disappointment the first time you realized you were looking for the backwards cap sticking out amongst the free weights would have been embarrassing but what's wrong with a little eye candy while breaking a sweat? 
And what a great view he makes. Your brief peeks into the mirrored walls are full of nothing straining muscles and glowing skin. The first day he did arms in a cutoff tee will go down in history as the worst day of your life. Only rivaled by all the other days he works his legs in shorts accentuating just how nice his ass is with every squat.
Your friends all ask when you’re going to talk to him again. As if you’ll just walk right up and interrupt the best part of your day. No, you’d rather watch him move across the gym floor from the corner of your eye, throw him a friendly nod, and go about your business than run the risk of making things awkward.
Unfortunately, doesn’t possess the same desire to remain a friendly nameless face like you do.
His name is Mingyu. Or that’s what the employee with glasses calls him while they joke around one night. You don’t mean to eavesdrop but they’re loud and the only exit takes you right past the U-shaped desk. Mingyu throws a grin as you pass by on your way out and the flash of teeth spikes your heart rate higher than any exercise you’ve done that night.
When he officially introduces himself at the water fountain the next night, you have to bite the urge to tell him ‘I know.’ Instead you snort at his extended hand, providing your own name over the firm shake like you won’t be haunted by the feeling of the calluses on his fingers or the heat of his palm for the next week. 
What’s worse is how he says your name back, rolling the sound across his tongue and past his quirked lips. 
And the final nail in the coffin is when you leave and you see the way he turns in the glass doors to watch, bidding you a goodnight with your name signed at the end.
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Mingyu might be the worst gym crush in the world. Mostly because your thoughts of him extend beyond the brick walls he should only exist in. And partially because he’s caught you staring more times than you care to admit. 
Not as many times as you’ve caught him, but the point stands.
No, the worst part, you find out, is Mingyu is an incorrigible flirt. And he knows it.
Tonight you’re off schedule, runny nearly half an hour later than usual.; work clothes sticking to your skin as you make your way towards the off shooting hall housing the entrance to the locker rooms. In a rush, you step around another body only to end up in front of one much more familiar.
“There's my girl.” Mingyu smiles. “Thought you were skipping out on me.”
My girl. My girl. My girl, my girl, my girl….
There isn’t a thought in your head beyond the bold casualness he drops that bomb on you with so you nod awkwardly and force yourself not to sprint the next twenty feet to hide.
Half an hour later, when you catch him watching you in the mirror over his own weights, the bastard smiles like the cat who caught the canary. 
But you end up on top when Mingyu offers to spot you while doing weighted squats. He’s at your back, an appropriate amount of space between your bodies you wish he’d close. You don’t need his help. Your form is better than his (you would know, his ass and thighs give you tunnel vision when its his leg day). And the weight on the bar isn’t even enough to make you strain but why pass up on the offer? Especially with how Mingyu meets your eyes over your shoulder in the mirror with each dip.
And then he cheers ‘that’s my girl’ again when you re-rack the equipment with ease and it's over.
“Shit,” you grunt. 
Mingyu pops up from his perch between your breasts under your shirt, hair a mess and eyes glazed. “Good?”
“No, your steering wheel is in my back.” You wince, attempting to wiggle away and ending up further up his lap.
“Sorry, let me just…”
The seat flies back under your combined weight, throwing your forehead right into Mingyu’s chin.
“Fuck!” 
“Oh my god!” You gasp. “Are you okay?”
Mingyu’s head falls back as he releases a massive sigh. Each second that ticks by has you both coming to the same conclusion.
“Yeah,” you breath, sitting up. “I think this was a bad idea.”
“Oh…”
“I just mean like your car is small and you’re too big and I—“
The guffaw Mingyu tries to hide slips free too easily. “That’s what she said.”
“God, you’re gross.” 
Your nose crinkles as you rise up, using his chest for leverage. It feels as nice as it looks and its the worst knowledge you’ve gained in you life.
“Sticks and stones,” he hums.
“Well this was fun. I’ll ugh… see you around?”
When you try to shift back into the passenger seat to exit, Mingyu’s hands flex over your thighs to keep you in his lap. His sweats do nothing to hide his semi. Something he doesn’t even seem to consider as a concern given the way he unconsciously curls into you.
“Or we can go back to mine.”
He’s trying and failing to sound nonchalant. Like he won’t go home and fuck his fist in the shower with the echoes of your sighs filling his ears if you turn him down. You can see it in his eyes. What hinges on his offer and how much you’ll both regret it if the tension fizzles and dies in his SUV.
From where you’re sitting, it’s incredibly difficult to think with your head and not your hormones. Mingyu is hot, he’s nice, he seems decent enough. His behavior doesn’t hint at him being a creep. If he’s normal enough to fuck in his car, is he not normal enough to fuck in the comfort of a bed?
The thumb stroking your thighs and the hopeful eyes staring you down make the decision for you.
“Yeah, okay.” 
With his address in your phone’s GPS, you trail after his SUV in your own car. The roads are familiar because they’re the same roads you drive when you return to your apartment that turns out to be only three blocks closer to the gym than Mingyu’s. 
All this time he’d been so close and you never even realized. Did he think about you the same way you thought about him when he drove home? If he did, you’re in for a night.
Rolling into a space only a few down from where he parks, you pause to hype yourself up. 
People have sex all the time. It’s no big deal. I can do this. 
A knock at the window interrupts your spiral, finding Mingyu smiling sheepishly through the glass. The muscles in your chest squeeze when he opens the door and holds it for you to exit; and threaten to explode when his hand finds the small of your back and guides you towards the stairwell.
Footsteps echo down to the hall, Mingyu only a fraction ahead to lead the way to a non-descript door with a seasonal doormat that's seen better days.
“Ugh, this is it.” 
His apartment is shockingly clean for a guy your age. Not clean in the ‘I don’t own enough shit to even be dirty’ way. No, Mingyu’s apartment is cozy. There’s throw pillows and blankets on the couch. He has a lamp and bookshelf in the corner and the walls are adorned with a collage of artwork thoughtfully pieced together. Several personal photos are littered throughout, some with an obviously younger Mingyu propped next to what must be a sister or a cousin, a few of him with friends. One of him and a familiar man with glasses, their faces blurry but the glee clear as they’re frozen in time. Your lips lift with a soft smile at the personal touches bleeding into every corner of his space.
Turning over your shoulder you ask, “You and the guy at the gym are friends?” 
Mingyu’s watching you with something unidentifiable in his eyes, stepping forward to figure out which frame you're looking at until he’s only a foot behind you.
“Yeah, we went to the same middle school.”
“And this one?” You say, fingers tracing the edge of the wooden frame.
“My little sister.” Mingyu follows, still only a step behind.
“And I’m assuming these are your parents?”
“Actually those are Wonwoo’s parents.” He chuckles. “These are my parents.”
Mingyu’s arm reaches around to point at the correct photo, his chest brushing against your back.
“Wanna give me the tour?”
Mingyu manages to show you everything in five minutes. The living room and connected kitchen you’re already standing in, the door of the hall bathroom, and finally his bedroom. You take a seat on the edge of the bed, discovering the new smattering of details that uncover more about the man waiting with baited breath in the threshold. 
“Why are you over there?” You ask.
With arms crossed and shoulders up to his ears, Mingyu resembles a kid waiting to be scolded rather than a man who tried to hook up with you in his car less than thirty minutes ago.
“I’m nervous.”
You can’t stop the satisfaction from spreading to your face. “I make you nervous?”
Mingyu pushes off the door jam, shuffling forward until he’s standing a foot in front of you. “Yeah. I don’t really do stuff like this.”
“Stuff like what? Try and fuck girls in your car?”
“Haha.” Mingyu mocks, face descending until he rubs his nose with yours.
Your eyes slip closed when his do, breathing each other's air. “Stuff like what, Gyu?”
Your hands find the material of his shirt stretched across his shoulder. Each brush of his lips across your cheek, down your jaw, until he finds your ear.
“I don’t sleep around with girls I’m not dating.”
Oh.
“We don’t hav—”
“Which is not the best way to ask you out.”
You press him out of your space, far enough that you can look him in the eyes and see if he’s serious. The tips of Mingyu’s ears burn red but he’s looking right at you despite how embarrassed he clearly feels.
“You’re asking me on a date?”
“Ugh, yeah. I think it’d be fun. But you don’t have to! If you just wanna do this that's fine t—”
Whatever words Mingyu was trying to say fizzle on the tip of his tongue as you pull him into a kiss. He curls over you, pressing you further into his bed with every fervent pass. Wedging one hand under the small of your back, Mingyu lifts you up and carries you while he crawls to the center.
Your mind wanders to all the other ways he can manhandle you into the mattress.
He settles flat against you, hips cradled between your own while delving into your mouth. You fill your hands with his ass, dragging Mingyu’s covered cock against your core. A groan backs apart your lips as Mingyu falls into the curve of your neck. 
“This is a yes to the date by the way.” You pant now that he’s taken over, hands scratching up his back in an effort to get rid of his shirt. “In case that wasn’t clear.”
Mingyu’s clothes disappear over his head and across the room, yours following shortly after. The heat of bare skin on bare skin is better than anything until he takes one of your breasts in his palm and the other in his mouth. 
Every curse you know flies through your lips as he sucks and pinches until you're sore between the legs.
He takes the squeeze of your thighs and the rock of your hips as a greenlight, hands leading where his lips follow until it’s nothing but your panty clad core an inch from his face.
“This okay?” Mingyu asks in the fat of your thigh, tongue trailing fire across the skin.
You nod with a sigh, “Mingyu, please.”
He doesn’t need much more than that, the fabric barrier gone in a blink and his nose traces your folds until he’s dying for a taste.
Mingyu eats pussy like he doesn’t need oxygen. The path of his pointed tongue around your clit is nothing short of precise, meticulously tracing every ridge and curve until the sheets stretch under your fingers. When he flattens it to pay broader attention, your legs squeeze and Mingyu’s hands force them wide around his shoulders.
Your feet flatten on the bed and thrust up his mouth, wet and crude with fingers in his hair and your whines in his ears. Every suck of Mingyu’s mouth forces the muscles in your neck to lerch until they hurt and your head falls back. He takes pride in the way you drip for him, making the best mess he’s ever had the privilege to clean up.
You reward him with an lavishing praise at the next twitch of your insides, “Fuck, just like that.” 
Taking advantage of the slight arch in your spine, Mingyu’s hand sneaks under your back, fingers unforgiving as they dig into your ass. He curls your hips up and buries a finger in your core with mortifying ease.
Between your legs, Mingyu catches your eyes. Pupils blown wide, mouths bruised around stuttered breath. A matching set of debauched expressions. He’s more familiar like this; skin glowing with sweat, and hair matted to his forehead. Next time you see him at the gym you know it's all you’ll think about. Next time you're alone in your room, or the shower, or the grocery store. Or anywhere you’ve day dreamed about him before.
He leans back to watch the digit disappear, only to reappear soaking. “Feels good?”
“Give me another and it will.”
You savor the rhythm he sets, thick fingers working to prep you for what you felt under his shorts. His tongue is hard and wet at your clit, fingers stretching and spreading until your stomach dips and you nearly buck him off as your clit swells from abuse.  
Your fingers pluck at your nipples and Mingyu apparently likes to watch because he manages more enthusiasm, forces his finger to crook just the right way, and continues to suck even after you start screaming.
“Oh fuck, oh, fuck, fuck, fuck!” You chant, voice cracked.
Something sounding suspiciously like a ‘thank you’ drops into the mix but Mingyu’s the only one to hear it. In his opinion, he should be the one doing the thanking; you just gave him enough spank bank material for the next six months.
You don’t dislike the taste of yourself on his tongue, his lips, his chin, his cheeks, and even his chest when you flip Mingyu over and aim to return the favor. He blushes when you lap against the hollow of his throat; embarrassed from the way he goes boneless with such simple affection.
He sinks into the plush of the mattress, propped up by the mountain of pillows at the headboard. Mingyu’s stomach stiffens under your tongue and the twitch blooms a smile on your face. Predictable.
“Sensitive?”
Your nails raking up the shape of his thighs turn the denial falling from his lips into a whine, and it makes you wonder what other sounds Mingyu will make with his cock in your mouth.
The vein bulging along the underside of his length gives your tongue something to trace along as you lap from base to flared tip, sucking down until it shines from spit and pre-cum. You take all you can until the curve of your throat protests.
Mingyu’s big and he’s loud.
“Oh God, shit.” He babbles with abandon, hands fisted at his sides until his knuckles turn pale.
You focus on the cock in your mouth rather than how pretty Mingyu’s chest would look covered in bite marks. How a bruise on his hip would be just visible when he reaches over his head to do pull ups, and red streaks from your nails on his bicep would make a great accessory.
A hand lands on the base of your skull, gentle until it's not. His thumb dips to stroke the bulge of his dick through your throat as you take him deeper. And like some ridiculous porno theres still an inch you’ll never be able to take even if you do nothing but let him fucking your mouth until the only thing you taste is cum.
“Fuuuuck,” Mingyu groans from a harsh suck on the upstroke.
He distracts you with his tongue on yours, keeping you from diving back down and destroying his ego from how quick you almost made him cum. Your one solace is the lazy grip you have on the base of Mingyu’s length, fingers tightening around the head while he cants into the squeeze.
You think Mingyu is going to plant you on his cock and make you ride it until one of you is crying. But he keeps pushing and pulling until you’re kneeling over his face, knees cushioned in the pillows and hands against the wall to steady you while he dives in again.
His head shakes back and forth, tongue out to swipe messily at your clit as you grind into his face. The last grip of sanity you have gives you the mind to reach back, jerking Mingyu off while he eats it, a cycle of moans moving through you; him into your folds when you squeeze from a grating pass off his tongue that has you whining to the ceiling fan.
“Shit, need you to fuck me.” You whine but don’t stop curling against the latch of his lips, legs stiff with ache.
It’s Mingyu who brings things to a halt, raising you away from his mouth until you're left on your knees while he stands to rummage in the drawer for a condom. You listen while the paint of the wall cools your forehead.
The hand at the dip of your spine makes you melt when he checks in, “Still okay?”
Nodding, you find him over your shoulder with a thick swallow. Mingyu’s nose follows the slope of your muscles, lips untying all the knots he’s worked into them over the past few weeks.
“Want it like this?”
“Yeah.”
You drop until your chest meets the bed and arch until it hurts just to put on a good show. Mingyu shuffles behind you, knocking your knees wider with his own, palms molding to your ass and spreading it apart to take a good look like he wasn’t tongue deep inside your pussy already. The room is nothing more than the sounds of grounding breaths; Mingyu watching the way your torso moves around the air, releasing a long exhale before moving closer.
The feel of his chest against yours was great, but the hard muscle of it along your back, his chain caught between and leaving a definitive mark, is life ruining. It shreds the last bit of humanity you’ve been clinging to since you dragged Mingyu to the parking lot and tried to stick your hands down his pants while leant against the passenger door.
No matter how well Mingyu stretched you for his cock it was never going to be enough. Taking the first inch nearly splits you in half. But you're soaked and needy; nothing short of the end of the world is going to keep you from getting the satisfaction of feeling him in your guts. You take it with measured breaths and affirmations to relax. Slow arches of his hips work him in until he’s flat with your ass and whispering absolute depravity into your ears.
“Fuck, you’re tight.”
Arching your ass higher, you whimper, “You’re huge.”
Your ass stings under his punishing hand, thrown forward by an involuntary buck of his hips.
“Don’t say that.”
You turn until you can look over your shoulder again, meeting wild eyes. “You feels so good.” You moan, eyelids low and wrecked.
“Didn’t—shit, think you’d have such a dirty mouth.” He bites into the side of your neck, sucking a bruise like a depraved teenager. 
“I knew you’d have a fat cock.”
You get what you want so easily it's almost insulting; Mingyu’s hand forcing your face into the sheets and his hips rushing into you with pure need. Every prod into your cunt has you wailing. It’d destroy your self respect if you could think of anything beyond how he’s ruining you for anyone else.
Pillows topple off the edge of the bed as you scramble for a hold. Anything to ground you against the burn in your veins with every tight squeeze around Mingyu’s cock. His balls slap against your clit teasingly, more degrading than the way he has you bent in half. 
“Harder,” you beg.
Mingyu falls back on his haunches, pulling you with him until you're sitting up right. His arm comes into view, curling around neck until your throat sits in the crux of his elbow and his hand latches on your shoulder; a crude headlock he uses as leverage to keep fucking into you. You’ve been choked but this is infinitely better. Whatever Mingyu wants to take from you, he’s in a position to do so.
“Gonna cum?” He nips into your earlobe.
His hand shoves its way between your legs, swipe roughly against your clit before you can even hope to answer.
A pathetic nod is all you manage thanks to the muscles gathered under your chin limiting your mobility.
Mingyu let's go then and your hands prevent a crash into the headboard, putting you back in the same position as before but you have to work for it now; ass bouncing in his laps as you ride him. Finding your balance, you drop one hand to your clit as Mingyu’s pinch your nipples.
“Let me have it, let me make you come." Mingyu pants into your spine. "Fuck you look so good like this, shit.”
He keeps rambling, flying with you towards the edge hand in hand; both breathless from the slap of your thighs against his.
“Mingyu, feel so good. Oh my god, oh my g—”
The softness of the pillows greets you once again while everything flashes white. Mingyu scrambles behind, fucking you into the mattress while you soak his cock. Muscles twitching, teeth ground till they crack, you come and come and come while begging him to do the same.
Mingyu gives in without hesitation, all his weight behind his hips as he fills the condom; dragging you back with an arm around your waist. Every jerk of his cock against your walls from the force makes you vibrate until he’s slipping out, soiled and used against the back of your thigh.
The last thing you register is his lips finding your shoulder again, rubbing back and forth as he comes down.
You fall asleep under the heat of his body for who knows how long, content in the mind shattering numbness of what just happened. Mingyu seems to feel the same, dead weight hanging half off you so you can at least manage to breath.
When you wake, whether it's twenty minutes or two hours later, Mingyu is snoring into the pillow, still naked. His lips pout in his sleep and you swallow the urge to shower them with kisses thanks to the drool at the corner of his mouth.
Even without the covers, you're warm. The kind of heat that slips over your skin, sinks into your bones and keens for you to fall asleep and stay. But Mingyu asked you on a date, not to spend the night. And you’d hate to assume and ruin whatever this is before it as a chance to start.
“Where are you going?” He pouts.
You don't make it two inches out of his arms before he’s pulling you back, tangling them around you so there's no chance of unnoticed escape. Mingyu digs his nose into your cheek and waits for an answer like he has all the time in the world.
Something tells you if he knew you were attempting to head home, Mingyu would throw a fit. And what use is that when you want to see what a night sleep with a giant human furnace is like?
“Bathroom.”
Adding to the list of information you’ve learned, Mingyu is a stage five clinger. He latches on to your back, guiding you into the shower stall for a quick spray down that leaves half your face, part of your thigh, and almost none of him clean.
He falls asleep against the base of your skull while brushing your teeth, because of course he has a stash of extra toothbrushes under the sink just in case. 
And when you crawl under the fresh sheets, he pulls you into his chest, leaves a kiss against your forehead, and tells you he can’t wait for your breakfast date tomorrow.
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Taglist: @tomodachiii @cvpidyunho @miniseokminnies @ddaengpotate @arycutie @gaebestie @primoppang @gyuguys @mine-gyu @doremifasire @missminhoe @toplinehyunjin @crvs4vldtn @prettygyuuu
© highvern. copying/reuploading/translating my work anywhere is strictly prohibited.
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determinate-negation · 2 months ago
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IMPORTANT update on mohammed's campaign!
mohammed almanasra @save-mohamed-family has unfortunately been having issues with fundraising. his first campaign was shut down by the bank and GFM without him getting any of the money he raised. recently he had some concerns about the person hosting his second campaign because he has only been receiving a small percentage of the funds raised and the host wouldn’t send receipts. he thought it'd be best if we started a new campaign with me hosting it and shut down the old campaign. i'll be organizing this now so hopefully there will be no problems and i can be transparent with him about the finances. also in a stronger currency (USD)
mohammed has been verified by @el-shab-hussein and is on the Vetted Gaza Fundraiser List #192 with this updated link now
you may have seen my other posts about his campaign, mohammed and i talk frequently and its so awful what he's been through in this genocide:
mohammed lost his mother, father, and four sisters who were killed in a bombing, and is now living in tents with his remaining family members, his wife and three young children. he was seriously injured in his foot and it may need to be amputated, but he told me that hes doesn't care if he loses his foot he just doesn't want to lose his family. his wife has uterine cancer but hasn't been able to get treatment recently because the genocidal israeli army has destroyed health centers. his children are suffering from infectious diseases spreading throughout gaza, and the little medical treatment available is very expensive. here’s a photo of his kids who instead of having a normal childhood have to struggle to survive.
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they've been displaced recently again, because of the israeli army changing the location of so called 'humanitarian zones,' and every displacement is expensive and exhausting, with no guarantee that where they are forced to move to is actually safe. right now mohammed told me he doesn't have good enough internet to use tumblr unless he goes to a internet hot spot which are often more dangerous because the idf targets people there. he knows it's risky but fundraising online is the only way he can support his family right now.
mohammed has made posts on his blog about their situation and i do encourage you to read his own words, because i am merely summarizing conditions that are far worse than any of us from outside can really comprehend
the pain of losing so many family members, your home, your job, your city, and everything you have is already unimaginable. please dont let him lose any more of his family. donate to this campaign and if you cant, share it with someone who can.
especially if you have a degree of disposable income i implore you to think about what you can reasonably give. it could be relatively small adjustment for you but make a significant difference for someone else. thank you very much everyone who participated already for starting this out with some donations.
$205 raised of $50,000 USD
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prael · 3 months ago
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I challenge you to a 20 minute writing challenge.
20 mins to write something based on 1 item on your left, and the 1st idol on your Tumblr Dashboard.
First idol on my dashboard: IVE Rei. Object on my left: A glass of milk.
MILK
18+ IVE Naoi Rei x male reader smut Masterlist
Words: 1250
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"Rei!" You slam closed the door of the refrigerator and make for the one into the living room. "Rei! When the milk is empty, you put the carton in the recycling!"
There she is, sitting on the couch, with a glass full of the stuff. She shrugs and says, "The empty carton is to remind us to buy milk."
"You mean it reminds me that I need to buy milk, because god knows you won't!" You run a hand through your hair, which is starting to go frizzy in the heat and the stress.
"I buy milk all the time!"
"Name one time."
Rei just blinks and stares, like the request is absolutely foreign to her. Her mouth slightly parted as she struggles to find an answer.
"That's what I thought, but sure, you just sit there with a glass full of the milk I bought."
Rei looks down, into the depths of the glass. "Oh."
"Oh?" You're throwing your arms in the air in defeat. "'Oh' is the best you can do, Rei?"
"You want this milk?" Rei throws you a dark, mischievous look. "Sure, you can have it." Then Rei tilts the glass towards herself, letting some it spill over her chest and into her cleavage. "Oops."
"The fuck is wrong with you?"
Rei just smiles that same smile and pours a little more onto her chest, splashing against her bare skin and then spilling into her white shirt. She starts to shift around uncomfortably. "It's really cold," she says, laughing as milk soaks her.
"You're insane."
"It tastes real good you know." She undoes the top two buttons and reveals her glistening skin beneath. "Taste it."
"I'm leaving, Rei." You roll your eyes and make for the bedroom. "You know we can't do this shit anymore. Make sure you clean up."
"Leaving, huh?" Rei giggles and pours some more milk—it soaks into her jeans now. "Guess I better enjoy myself."
"Whatever," you say as you start to walk past her.
"Mmmm, yup, that's the spot. Oh geez, I'm totally ruining the sofa, this is great. It's getting me so wet. So cold, aah..." Rei's soft little moans start to fill the room. "Mmm, shit, this feels nice." She doesn't even look up at you. She knows what she's doing.
But even knowing she's crazy doesn't stop your feet from stopping in the living room. It doesn't stop you from watching, as more and more milk drips down her exposed skin, or as her white shirt clings desperately to her breasts. Or when her nipples push up against the material, when they show through so clearly. Or as she squeezes herself gently through her shirt. Her legs start to tremble. "Oh my god, this is amazing."
Your blood flows in only one direction, and with your heartbeat pumping you can feel all the annoyance leave your head. You stare, and Rei giggles into her drink. The last little dribble falls into her lap. Her legs twitch as the chill goes up and down her body.
"I really, really need someone to clean me up," she says as if she's talking to herself, and not to you, her roommate.
A second passes in silence. The distant voices from the television are like faint static in your ears.
Then the scene fades out as you lose consciousness of your actions. Fades out into a series of rapid stills. Snapshots of time and memory and images, flashing before you: of you throwing your pants to the side, of pulling her shirt over her head, of licking a drip of milk running down her navel, of the way she calls you an idiot in-between heavy breaths. There's her bra on the floor, her hand on your head, pulling you closer to her breast.
Your face a mess, and the milk now a hint sweeter as it lingers on your taste buds. Your hands struggling to unfasten her pants, peeling the material off her soaked skin. Her panties, the lacy black pair with the red bow in the middle, soon to find her ankles. You're tasting more of her than the milk now. Some twisted combination of the two on your tongue, your mouth exploring every inch of her cunt. The taste of her driving you mad.
Everything gets so fast. Time rushing by, skipping seconds in a sequence, one scene bleeding to the next with nothing in between. Everything overlaid with an unbreaking daze. The point of your head buried in her, her arms above her head and clenching tightly on the back of the sofa, and your tongue ravishing her pussy.
Only Rei's voice grounds you from your delirium. "Right there," she cries out. "Right there, yeah, lick right there... I'm cumming for you."
But the experience is a rush—her voice in your head sounds tinny and distorted. It barely makes sense to you, your own mind floating just out of touch. Your nerves are buzzing, and your arousal burns like an unstoppable wildfire.
The room shifts. Not literally, but in your perception, your field of vision twisting and turning until Rei is suddenly on all fours before you, her naked back and ass pointing into the air. Your hands caress her perfect skin, smooth like satin. Each touch sends shockwaves through the surface. You grab her hips, firmly, pulling her toward yourself and closer to your dripping cock, ready to fill her. And in a fluid motion, you slide yourself into her. She squeaks in delight.
Now your focus tightens on each thrust, each motion of you plunging inside Rei. You pull on her hair, gently, as she pushes her hips backwards to meet you. You told yourself a hundred times that the last time would truly be the last time. A lie you keep telling yourself. No matter how much it happens, she always manages to crawl her way back under your skin and into your blood. She's a disease that refuses to end, the toxicity you keep coming back to for more.
Her voice breaks out in an uncontrollable series of moans. Loud, forceful, and totally in control as you rock your hips back and forth. She grips your hand on her hip. "Harder," she cries, "fuck me, please, fuck me as hard as you can."
The warmth of her drives you further and further into a well of pleasure so deep you can't see the bottom.
Her moans become frantic and excited. Your breaths become deep and ragged, and your pulse pounds in your eardrums as a sweat comes to the surface. You close in and kiss her back, tasting her fair skin again. As the pace builds, so too does the pressure well up inside you—a sharp heat inside, about to break loose.
"Harder," Rei screams, and bites her lip as you deliver, you feeling her shudder and collapse as if every bit of strength left her all at once. Her body responds involuntarily to your movements, jerking in time. As it does, it sparks a response inside you. You bury your head between her shoulders and squeeze her hips as you cum—delight ripples and flows throughout your body.
She screams and trembles and collapses onto the sofa, pulling you down after her. You rest your chest against her back and kiss her neck tenderly. You share your heaving breaths and hot, sticky sweat. The room spins. Rei pants and speaks not a word.
In your head you tell yourself, 'this is the last time.'
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bearyzdiary · 8 months ago
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Who’s the hot ass milk man?
Francis mosses x reader
This diary entry contains…Absolute down bad reader|Francis being..Francis|Suggestive in a way |Kinda modern|Reader is around the same age as Francis obviously!|Both characters are set to be 20ish 💁‍♀️|short Drabble|
A/N:My FIRST time writing about him!This fandom needed more tumblr fics as the ones on Ao3 are good besides the fact people are already making weird content about this man…ANYWAY!Enjoy!🎀
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In this day and age you wouldn’t expect people to have their milk delivered still,But some people still saw it as a nice way to make quick money.The only reason you liked milkmen still being around was because one of them was fine like hell.
Everytime you saw him it made you wanna do a cartwheel.Francis was a very quiet person who only seemed to wanna get his job done with for the day.His tired eyes always displayed had this tired look in his eyes.
When you first met him you had to stop yourself for saying the most down bad sentence to him and kindly accept the milk.The cold bottle would just sit in the fridge until you needed it for something like making pancakes or cereal.
But you were always thankful to see francis.When he did talk it was addictive to hear.His tired voice made you think things that didn't need to be thought.
Sometimes if you were lucky enough he would flash you a small smile before walking back to his truck.You always wondered if he had a lover of some sorts.He seemed to be a normal dude who was good looking so you were shocked when he revelaed he was single.
You joked about how you were always open but in the truth was that you werent really joking and that you would always be open to date him.
"do other girls try to hit on you?"You had asked while checking him out as he shook his head."Not really.Most of them don't end up even answering the door."Francis stated while handing you the bottle.You gladly took it before clearing your throat.
"Would you be interested in dating someone"You ask while swirling the container of liquid around the bottle.Francis paused before shrugging."Never crossed my mind.I'm always so busy with work i never thought about a relationship"He said before checking his watch.
"as much as i would love to listen to your ways of trying to figure out my love life so you can ask me out,I have more people to get to"He said before waving you bye and turning to head to his truck.
You stood confused on your porch before fully getting what he said.You felt your face heat up as you shuffled back into your house.Even if you wanted to deny it,You knew it was true.As you sat the bottle down on the table you realized that something was written on it.
inspecting the bottle more you smiled as you realized it was a phone number and it was signed with the letter F.You smiled as you went to write it down on a piece of paper so you dont forget to send him a text later.
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