#Smartguy

[eric-sadahire]

If a beautiful woman disagrees with me, I will immediately change my views. I have no principals.

[pillbugpaints]

thinking about insomnia (the character above) and their relationship to gender identity. her transness is sort of funny to me. he is only trans because when he was made, his creator said "yeah, that's probably a girl" and it disagrees. they were not made with reproductive organs, or chromosomes, or whatever you might use to ID something's "biological sex". her creator just went "this is a girl-thing" lmao. i know I literally created her I just think its funny how in-universe he implies that gender can persist even when you literally made a sexless creature #society

[raspberryjamrock]

omg irt to the satellite officer post what hypnospace outlaw song are u thinking of…

GO CRAZY!!!! <- satellite orchestra by barnaby's chair. also everything that barnaby in that game makes Fucking owns and could probably apply to someone in some way tbh

[foone]

I was thinking about how there's been a couple of times in 4:3 Star Trek where an episode written for one series gets repurposed for another series: ie, TNG's The Child from season 2 started as a script for the canceled Star Trek: Phase II show.

The thing is, they have to swap around characters when they do this. It's not Captain Kirk anymore, it's Captain Picard. The doctor is Crusher, not Bones, etc.

I was thinking it'd be amusing if some future Trek show started requiring that scripts be written to make this easier to do.

Like:

SMARTGUY: Captain! ENGINEER says the core is nearing collapse.

CAPTAIN: Understood. SCIENCEGUY, get down there and help with the TECHTECH.

TACTICALGUY: Captain, permission to engage the enemy ship?

CAPTAIN: Granted. PILOTGUY, evasive maneuvers, MAKEITSOPHRASE.

[blazeshardcat]

i think, therefore i am

-

made this strand warlock art around the release of lightfall!! when i started drawing this, nezarec wasn't confirmed to be the raid boss, but by the time it was done the raid race had come and passed.... denied a cool Smartguy moment.... oh well

[agnesandhilda]

fascinated by the phenomenon of male blue lock fans on the r/bluelock subreddit saying out loud that "fangirls" liking the same characters as them makes them feel the need to choose new favorites. you're saying your goated smartguy favorite seems less tough to you because he gets too much pussy?

[slowdrippingnoise]

I cannot stop thinking about Fords dream. Plan sexual? Is this aroace confirmation??

"Attracted to planning" my ass. What happened to attracted to strange and the strange was always attracted to him?? You are a weirdo, except it

I an aroace and i was concerned that Ford will be straight in TBOB but now i am just confused???

I see you want to scream about the book of bill. Please scream at me i need someone else in this madness

OK!!!! so this is an extremely interesting question, and my perception of it is very heavily influenced by this interview being fresh in my mind (you've probably already read/watched but if not go do that it's great) towards the end you can find alex answering a question about ford being interpreted as queer- and basically talking about how ford is written as extremely romantically/interpersonally repressed in general- I won't try to summarize it i genuinely recommend just going and reading that, he describes it all better than I could (and again maybe you already have idk)

I feel like the tbob dream note could be taken a number of ways (and, while I wouldn't actually ask it cause i feel like leaving it up to imagination is actually more interesting in a creative engagement kind of way, i'm desperate to know what hypothetical answers are hiding behind that "usually" oh ford) but the thing that sticks out to me is. i mean it's very difficult to read it as straight isn't it. ford has recurring dreams about being quizzed on "what he's attracted to" and consistently dodges the question (doesn't even give a straightforward answer like "nothing", he misdirects back onto his logical smartguy persona) it's definitely a nod to fans too, sure, but in-character it's no-way-out firmly establishing that his sexuality specifically is on the Grand List of Stanford Pines Insecurities. we definitely got a nod to this way back in j3 of course- the ford&fidds campout conversation- but this i think this new tidbit betrays a much more internal fixation/anxiety than "it's confusing to me and I don't really want to think about it for more that a minute at a time" (<-the vibe his j3 stuff had more of to me) TL;DR whatever he is, i do not think you can call this man canonically straight at all lmao. W

(ok i'm losing track of my own thoughts a bit here. i should've outlined this like an essay lmao. back on track-)

In terms of what I personally believe/headcanon? honestly i'm in a funny in-between place right now- if you asked me last week i'd just say "he's gay probably" but this has me Thinking now in a more "ok, what cooperates best with canon and how I personally view him" way and the "ford aroace" people are making some interesting points. my most recent idea of him that i've been rolling around in my mindscape like a shiny rock goes basically like this:

(putting this under a cut)(also this goes wildly off-topic for a while because i love talking about ford. i promise it is tangentially related and relevant to my argument)

ford is repressed in how he deals with people because people are confusing and often scary (history of bullying and ostracization, we all hc him as some kind of autistic, etc.), and this extends to how he views romance/sex- if you don't see yourself as safe/belonging among other humans it can be extremely difficult to imagine yourself in such intimate dynamics with them (accepted, loved) and ford is very well established to close himself off to keep himself safe. the prospect of "romance" is by default more unsettling than it could ever really be comforting to him (within his ability to imagine it, at least) outside of the rarer "what if i was just normal and nobody bothered me for existing" fantasy, which is its own can of worms,,

another part of this is my (more arbitrary/i know because im right forever/because i lived it) hc that the elder pines twins' parents didn't really love each other by the time they were raising stan and ford, it was more of a "we both pay the rent/keep the family going, we may not strictly like each other and yeah there's a screaming fight or two every few years, but divorce is off the table because it would leave us both financially up the creek, so you do what you gotta do" situation. which has the potential to do. things. to how you think about Traditional Ideas of Couples and Suchlike. take my word for it.

another important part, though i find myself getting technically off-topic for a ways here, my apologies- i've been thinking about ford's Patterns with his attachments, in that he generally has one Main Person to focus on and trust at a time, and for a most of his life these attachments end Badly- throughout his entire adolescence he has stanley as that person, they exist in constant contrast to each other, their own self-perceptions are defined by their existence as a duo, covering for each other's weaknesses (to the extent that they can ignore traits in themselves that "double up", so to speak- stanley is the dumb muscle and ford is the booksmart genius with potential- no way out of that)(their dad affects this too)(oof) he and stan have a really awful falling-out that leaves ford with the belief that his One Person was willing to sabotage his future, completely disregarding ford's own feelings or sense of security and agency, just to get his way. (strike 1.5? against ford's ability to trust people) --- in college he attached to his roommate, fiddleford- and they genuinely get along and compliment each other really well! they're besties for life! yippee! so ford has a Person again, to exist next to, to prop himself up. but their lives go in different directions- they both move on with their studies/careers, and ford winds up in gravity falls, alone, where he has trouble again interacting with the locals and spends all his time wandering the woods, with endless hours for introspection. --- enter- Bill! :) bill becomes ford's 3rd Person, and he flatters ford and manipulates him and validates him and offers him everything he could ever shallowly imagine would solve all his problems and patch up the gaping hole in his self-worth forever definitely (while reminding him of what he remembers/imagines of his brother most likely, ow) bill is also more "safe" than other people, he's an anomaly, a supernatural phenomenon, even, and he lives exclusively inside ford's head. he's a perfect, safe, obsession target. (billford situationship essay for another day)

until he's not, of course.

until his college bestie Person is back too, and he's more Real than bill in a way that's very comforting, but fidds is another strong influence, one for the better, and bill can't have that around, he has to go. after that his relationship with bill also turns sour extremely quickly in a terrifying way, which leaves ford shaken and unmoored and desperate, which leaves... stan.

which also falls apart. (strikes 2, 3 and 1.5-the-sequal in rapid succession)

the 30 years spent multiverse-hopping are interesting to me too in how they affected ford- i think being around so much "abnormality"/being disconnected from his own world's ideas of normal did a lot to mellow him out- but he still couldn't really stick around anywhere to form deeper bonds with anybody, he's a wanderer until bill is dead, which may well end up killing ford in the process, so...

then! he's back home! which is bad! (from his perspective) but gives him the opportunity to try to Attach to a 4th Person- dipper! this was a secret essay on why i think he's Like That about dipper all along not about romance at all haha trick'd'ya! (i'm joking)

anyway you get the idea- fortunately he has a slightly wider support net by the end of the show between stan, fiddleford, and the kids- but to me it's relevant in that ford has a very limited network of people who he is close to at all, considering that his view on romantic relationships seems to orbit around "don't wanna think about that/that's scary, I don't know/etc.", and that for a long time the relationships(platonic or otherwise) that he did have were defined by their ending in trauma, guilt, and shame. it makes sense to me for him to not really be able to figure himself out, how do you dissect all the layers of the bonds you do manage to form, tease out one strong emotion from another, especially when you're always afraid of ruining something because this is all you have?

I guess, given all that rambling, to me he lands within some combination of demi-aroace(attraction of any kind is rare and difficult to distinguish from other emotions, needs a strong base first) and too repressed and deeply, deeply traumatized to really say what comes naturally and what's his brain trying to protect him from being hurt. he knows that something is, by the standards of humanity, "wrong" with him, but it's just another note on a long list of "reasons normal people don't like him". and he's gay.

-----

ok i probably forgot some stuff but i think thats my thoughts on that lmao. anyway BOOK OF BILL this makes me. so crazy. hasnt left my brain for days. i will never be the same i called these shots i CALLED them. but i couldn't imagine. anyway-

while i'm still talking about ford, i love that this book let him be more emotionally vulnerable than j3 did, i feel like there was a harsher impression of ford among fans for a long time (at least, with people who weren't already Obsessed with him) because he has limited time in the actual show for his character to be established, and a lot of j3 either had him on the defensive, or still stuck in "everything ever is my fault" mode. getting a better view both of how bill manipulated him, and how he's still affected by it "postcanon" puts him way more in line with. how i've seen him all along basically!! augh. he's lonely and insecure and afraid and wants so, so badly to connect to people,, "the ego of a king. the insecurity of a circus freak." compare to "my immense self hatred vs my delusional god complex" we were so right.

his last section of the book is. so so perfect i'm so glad we have that- it wraps up what felt like a loose end with other pieces of canon leaving him on "i'm the biggest idiot in the world" which felt. bad. all things considered. but tbob lets him air out that soul-crushing shame in such a beautiful way- both in letting us the audience actually See how it was with him and bill before, and his family reassuring him that they love him and don't carry some massive sense of Blame for him being manipulated... it hurts good man. perfect place to end on. he's gonna be ok it'll be ok.

related- possession pages go crazy. like that is some "i've read fanfiction less fucked up than this" shit and I [the rest of this sentence redacted for my dignity] what was i saying. the dream scene was so viscerally upsetting. the "light switch". the stretching. (alex drop a link to your ao3 account. urgh) bill is so so so scary for that brief moment which is an amaaazing essential addition to the book that actually made me feel horrifically personally sorry for the little bastard for the first time maybe ever. i mean this so genuinely he's the worst he's been he's the saddest he's been it's a beautiful tapestry drawing me in. it's gonna occupy my brain for weeks. maybe months. he's desperate to hold on to ford he's desperate for his plans to work for once and he's pissed as hell but also now he has an excuse to cut loose- he doesn't have to hide his angry, shitty, abusive side from this little human that he's grown so attached to(who he sees himself in)- he can see ford and ford can see him (or, what he's willing to think of as "himself")(where did you all go-) and ford is just living a nightmare that he couldn't have possibly imagined. incredible

i'm practiced at being emo about ford i've been emo about ford since 2015 but the bill thing is new to me (not strictly the lore, i was around for the reddit AMAs/the axolotl poem, but the elaboration-) and it's killing me. he's so fucked. he's hopeless. he's fucked himself up so bad and refuses to get any better because just looking at it inside his head is too much. there's a loud buzzing in his ears and he blacks out for 30 seconds. everyone loved him he was the best baby ever. sixer, it would eat you alive. the doctor says three sips a day will make the visions go away. where did you all go. he's fine, he's fine, he's fine. it's all hitting me fresh like it's brand new, funy nightmare triangle abandonment issues go brrrr-

he wants ford to want him so bad he wants to not be alone so bad. hes awful he ruins every chance he gets and it's all genuinely his own fault. fuck (im not gonna talk about "pain is hilarious" im not gonna be cringe im not gonna do it) blacked-out list of exes love and fear are the same love cage you're my property if lost return to bill cipher covered in blood all alone in the universe-

I was gonna elaborate on those last scraps but. i am running out of brain. big week for ford enjoyers. big week for me being so so sad (/pos) ☀️

[thelobotomites]

🧀therealchedder Follow

people keep thinking that im ... not a real cheese

3 notes

💀skulltastic Follow

why does @/therealchedder have to be so fake

🧀therealchedder Follow

i am not fake.

💀skulltastic Follow

says the bot

🧀therealchedder Follow

i could very easily make a joke that you would get all angrcheese at

💀skulltastic Follow

l + ratio + fatherless

🧀therealchedder Follow

i am no longer going to respond to you

#chedderphobia

9 notes

👴oldguy41930 Follow

how this work how typosjzdxn

💻smartguy Follow

delete system 32

👴oldguy41930 Follow

hhhow

💻smartguy Follow

just ask uh your kid or smth

46183 Notes

✒️writerisright Follow

Ok so to write this book correctly that you obviously want to do, you must OH SHOOT THE FBI IS COMING

❗️worriedguy Follow

oh crap r.i.p

🐸frogg123 Follow

worriedguy lives up to there name lol

#meme

59 Notes

👁️eyeball Follow

👁️ 👀 u

🐟emofish Follow

emo

3 Notes

[crimsonbits]

All that art of Beika and Mizole bonding over hating Ichiya is so funny because while, yeah, they do have that in common, I'm convinced they wouldn't fucking stand each other either. With their competitive and contrarian attitudes? Beika and Mizole would be absolute worsties. They would strangle each other if you put them in the same room. One is a cynical pretentious smartguy™️ who listens to jazz and the other is a scrappy delinquent punk who thinks everyone from Inkopolis is a mainstream normie snob. They would aim for each other's throat.

[transgenderer]

i wish yudkowsky was actually an expert in literally anything. like somehow i think hes managed to avoid being a real expert in any topic. the perils of autodidactism? hes 43! by 43 you should be an expert in *something* if your whole deal is being a smartguy

[irritants]

almost wasted 30+ minutes making tomato soup from scratch in the middle of the night for my grilled cheese but remembered i made a bunch of tomato sauce last week... added a bit of chicken broth and sour cream to some of it and now it's soup #smartguy #nasa

[mewo-personal]

OKAY FINE. HERE. ARE YOU HAPPY NOW.

/silly

Here it is take yo song lyrics

Not your object [WIP]

Quit putting labels on me, I'm not a can of soup

And despite being different, I'm a person too

I just wanna be myself, I'm harmless, don't you see?

I'm not a fucking animal, I just wanna be me

[CHORUS]

Quit trying to shape me,

Quit trying to change me,

I'm not a fucking object for your amusement!

Quit trying to reform me,

Quit trying to conform me,

Trying to stuff me into a box isn't improvement!

[Instrumental break]

"You shouldn't wear a suit, that isn't lady-like!"

Well then guess what, smartguy, go on and take a hike.

"Oh, are you mad? That's girly."

Guys have emotions too.

"Hey, [deadname] are you in there? I know this isn't you!"

Oh shut it, she's dead and gone, NOW THIS IS WHO I AM!

[LOUD METAL SCREAM]

[CHORUS]

QUIT MISGENDERING ME!

QUIT TRYING TO SHAPE ME!

I'M NOT A PEICE OF PAPER FOR ORIGAMI!

QUIT MISGENDERING ME!

QUIT TRYING TO HURT ME!

I'M NOT A FUCKING GIRL JUST 'CUZ I WEAR A SKIRT!

I'M NOT YOUR OBJECT TO SHAPE AND CHAAAAANGE!!!

Concept: mix of savages(specifically chonnys cover) and jigsaw puzzle

More specifically: most of the song is savages-esque and the chorus is like a mix of the two

Obligatory tags: @the-arcade-doctor @a-moths-privacy @a-mimic-and-a-jester

[marinerainbow]

I made headcanons for Roger and Jessica, and I plan on posting for other characters (especially Delores), so have some headcannons for

~The Toon Patrol~

~Smartass~

Unlike the others, Smartass actually studied the law. He had planned to become a lawyer, but when his criminal record caught up to him, he lost his license and officially started his gang.

One of his crimes was identity fraud. It's why he has so many names like Smarty, Smartguy, Wiseguy, etc (I know in actuality it was Disney trying to censor his name, but still).

He also used to be married but is now divorced. His spouse left him when they found out about his double life. Smartass will still offer relationship advice to those he's closest to but other than that he keeps that part of his life private. The only one in the group that knows his former relationship best is Stupid.

He loves the finer things in life. Just look at all that jewelry! He takes a lot of pride in his appearance and takes care of himself the most out of the other weasels (though why he still chooses not to wear pants or proper shoes, I have no idea). You'll get a smile out of him and a cheeky "I know~" if you compliment his appearance, but he won't really take it to heart unless you two are close.

In my last OC post, I stated I headcanon all toons have an artistic ability of some kind. Smartass' is writing. Slice of life stuff. If he wasn't a gangster, he'd probably make a pretty penny off of his writing.

~Greasy~

Similar to Smartass, Greasy also likes the finer things in life. But he doesn't put as much effort into his appearance (minimal/no jewelry, cheap cologne, just generally greasy, etc). It's like he's trying to put up the front of a well off man rather than actually be one.

He can appreciate art of all kinds, especially if it's centered around feminine beauty or intimacy. Writing, paintings, sculptures, whatever. Of course he's got the sleazy magazines as well. (@slashingdisneypasta actually inspired me for this headcanon with her own for Greasy).

He's Smartass' right hand man for a reason, and not just because they're friends. If he needs to, he'll focus solely on the job, he'll get things done, and he knows how to intimidate people. Not to mention his ability to come up with plans on the fly, like when he dropped the bricks on Roger. Tldr, he's more than just the silly pervert of the group.

He absolutely tries to get advice for women from Smartass since he had a relationship before. It doesn't work.

His artistic ability is playing the guitar, and I think he'd have a fairly decent singing voice. If he didn't snoop on women backstage, I can imagine him getting gigs at clubs like Jessica.

~Wheezy~

He's the gun expert of the group. He taught Stupid and Psycho how to properly use firearms and take care of them. Smartass and Greasy had more knowledge then those two, but they still learned a thing or two from Wheezy.

Despite his lean frame, he's the second physically strongest member, next to Stupid.

I don't know why, but I can see him liking nature documentaries. Maybe he finds them relaxing. Just imagine him puffing away at his cigarettes while listening to Liam Neeson narrate about the life of seahorses or something while on his downtime.

The reason why his whole appearance/demeanor is completely different compared to the others is that he was made for war propaganda cartoons. He has fabricated memories of being in the war, even though he was just made for cartoons. He mostly keeps them to himself, but sometimes he needs to talk to someone about them and get it all off his chest.

His artistic ability is playing the violin. I know that the violin/guitar case he carries in the movies was used as a way to hide the gun, but I still like the idea of him playing the violin. I can also see him get into wood carving.

~Psycho~

Psycho doesn't sleep often, but when he does his eyes remain open and he curls up. It looks just as freaky as it sounds. Only when he is completely relaxed is when he'll actually close his eyes while sleeping and let himself sprawl out.

You can tell he's excited at the prospect of killing Roger ("Time to kill the rabbit!~"), but he never makes a move towards Roger until it was time. As such, I think that Psycho can very easily be patient, as long as he knows he'll get what he wants in the end. One could argue that it was simply because the TP didn't get enough screentime, but I like this idea better.

Psycho needs something to do with his hands. It's part of the reason why he has his razor in his hands half the time and hugging himself the rest of the time. Honestly just give him a rubrics cube or something and he'll be happy and distracted for a while. He's also learned how to do plenty of tricks with his razor. It's impressive but scary too.

Psycho has plenty of animalistic habits. It's not like he's got the brain of a wild animal, he just communicates a bit differently. For example, he takes smiling with teeth as a threat and will threaten people that way, he can imitate plenty of sounds perfectly, etc.

Mirrors make him uncomfortable. In the bathroom, he'll hang a towel on the mirror while he does his morning routine, and he'll avoid the mirror section in home decor stores at all costs.

His artistic talent is drawing/painting. Sometimes he just draws whatever comes to mind, but he'll also draw specific people and places he wants to commit to memory. Anyone who receives a portrait of themselves from Psycho has pretty much gained the ultimate sign that they are important to him. I can also see him be able to play the accordian.

I'm not entirely sure about this one, but I still like it so I guess I'll let you guys decide what you think. The yellow swirls in his eyes will change color based on his emotions. Yellow is happy/neutral, red is anger, green is sick/disgust, and blue would be sadness (and pink for love)

~Stupid~

I did some research after seeing it on another blog, and it turns out propeller hats were seen as science fiction novelty items back then. So I think Stupid likes sci-fi stuff. He'd definitely be a fan of Star Trek.

Another thing he likes is sports. His bat isn't just his weapon, he genuinely likes baseball. He mostly just collects cards, but if he was ever gifted a ticket to a live baseball game, he would love that person forever.

And of course, cooking. He can't cook very well on his own, but he absolutely loves sharing recipes and talking about his favorite food. If he got a cooking buddy, the TP's kitchen will be used nearly 24/7.

Stupid is dyslexic. He legitimately can't read, or at least not very well. He likes it when other people read to him. Psycho is the one who reads to him the most, but Smartass will do it as well when he has time.

Out of all the Toon Patrol, he's pretty good with emotional support. He may not be the best with life advice, but he'll just be there to be an open ear and offer hugs (his hugs are the best, trust me). And sometimes, that's all you need.

His artistic talent is playing the trombone. He's also learning how to use the kazoo.

~The whole group~

In the movie, it's implied that Smartass has a bigger gang than just the four other weasels ("We got informants all over the city."). So my headcannon is that Smartass is the head of the weasel gang in Toontown, and the rest of the Toon Patrol are his best men that he chose to join in on Judge Dooms plot. There are other gang's in Toontown, like the wolf gang or the coyote gang (Wile. E was a former member before he got hired by Warner Bros), but the weasel gang is most notorious, especially after Judge Doom made them a police force.

I've seen at least two people headcanon that Smartass and Psycho are brothers, and that's cool to see! But personally, I headcanon that it's Stupid and Smartass that are related. Or at the very least were drawn to be a duo in their cartoons. They both have the same- if not similar- fur colors, and I don't think Smartass ever really physically hit Stupid. He threw the plunger at him to shut his mouth, but he didn't wack him on the head like he did Greasy and Psycho.

I actually don't think Psycho and Smartass get along. Psycho was pointing and laughing at his boss while he was dipped, so at the very least Psycho doesn't care too much about Smartass. One could easily argue that he was too caught up in his laughter to stop, but that doesn't explain why he put in the effort to point at his boss, making it clear he found his death amusing. Greasy was also laughing yes, but he didn't have the view Psycho did so maybe he thought his boss flew over the dip.

Smartass and Greasy have been friends the longest. Psycho and Stupid are best friends. Wheezy is easygoing, so everyone gets along with him.

Greasy and Psycho both go out on their own sometimes to do their own thing. Smartass knows what they're up to, and he knows they'll be back eventually, so his only rule is that they clean up after themselves and tell him where they are going so he knows where to look for them if they are gone for too long. Stupid and Wheezy are allowed to go on their own too, but they mostly just stay home (though Wheezy does go out on his own more than Stupid).

Smartass and Stupid are comedy toons, Greasy is a risqué toon, Wheezy is a generic toon, and Psycho is a horror toon. They all were villains in their respective cartoons.

They are toons, so technically they are ageless. Or at least don't age like humans. But if I were to give them ages, Wheezy would be 47 (born/made right at the turn of the century), Greasy 38, Smartass 35, Psycho 28, and Stupid 25. And from tallest to shortest is Stupid, Wheezy, Greasy, Psycho, and Smartass.

I hope you guys like these. Any questions you guts have, I'll be more than happy to answer ^^

[dappersautismcreature]

foolish genius #1 smartest fella on the island its all the banana he eats super smart mega brain smartguy (im actually pretty serious about this if the binary black n white idea works out :3)

[kozykricket]

thinkin back about like. lightners dark world designs being based on what role they believe they play in their life, so to speak

berdly views himself as a cool elite starwars lookin smartguy

noelle views herself as an angel, with obvious ice theming for obvious reasons. cant help but believe hospital theming may also be at play in the ‘fit

…susie just views herself as susie. thats why she has such little design change

and kris?

kris is blue. do with that what you will

[heartandmusic]

this is an experience probably only specific to me but on multiple occassions i've edited a subtitle file that was pretty clearly transcribed and theres a line (usually a name or place) that doesn't seem like it matches what the character is saying (or the subtitler left a ??? in place of the word) and then i use my extreme smartguy resarch skills/context analysis and i manage to find out EXACTLY what the character said oh my godddddd i feel like him⬇️