#Slashing Through Your Trauma
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Slashing Through Your Trauma Pt 1
It was complicated enough going back to college, after everything that happened the first time. Then, the fact that she had not yet tapped into her own healing, and there she had been, back in one of the most triggering environments that existed in her world, finishing her degree to learn how to heal others. But, Hallie managed. 
For a time, she didn’t feel comfortable going by her own name, but once she did get around to the healing portion of her personal evolution, Hallie McDaniel was ready to be secure in being Hallie McDaniel again. Then one day, she became Hallie McDaniel, PsyD. And after some time, she became Hallie McDaniel, Ph.D. 
She traveled for lectures, wrote books, did scientific research, and every now and then, when she wasn’t obsessing over high-profile criminal cases, helped with lower-profile ones. “This is a horror movie in the making!” She heard Mickey’s voice say one night and she looked around the apartment and began her triple checks of all of the potential entries and hiding spaces if anyone was already inside. It was just her. 
Hallie opened the top of her night shirt in the mirror and looked at her scar. She should not still be here. A lot of factors went into her now standing in the mirror, looking at herself. 
1. Killers are often not as talented as they think they are. A single stab wound, in just the right place and she’s dead. A single stab wound slightly off from just that right place, and she has a better chance of survival. 2. Blood loss could have killed her, but after the guards never checked in, when detectives were sent to search, she had not yet enough to kill her. But, she did not have a lot of time. 3. There was no killer to check that she wasn’t alive. The killers went to square off with Sidney, and both died that night. 4. There were no copycats to chase after the dream of killing her, because she was part of a small, exclusive group that people didn’t know about.
Hallie had survived the killings, and she was able to receive protection specifically for the fact that it had already been proven that copycats may try to hunt again. When she had the chance to recover physically, with a scar and a lasting but treatable respiratory situation, Hallie McDaniel had survived. She was never quite right again.
Sometimes, she found herself perusing the sites where people glorified her friends’ murderers and romanticized her presumed death. There were people who got something out of thinking about Mickey killing her. People who were obsessed with it. She found herself reading their message board posts and trying to desensitize herself to the recoil of finding things like that. Sometimes, she found herself studying them for personal reasons. She knew that Mickey had found Billy Loomis’s mother on message boards like these. Were some of these people also potential killers? 
And even more importantly, were some of these people potential Ghostface killers? She was unable to stop obsessing about whether or not some version of the killer may find her. That inability to let it rest led her to traveling to try to find survivors, in areas where there had been suspicious happenings of murder,  just to see if they by chance escaped Ghostface or someone like him. This became her passion outside of her work, and something she kept extensive research on.
This was private work, but it caused her to have to relive her attack and revisit her time with the friends she had met in college and thought she might have for the rest of her life. 
Even though she made her decision to come out of witness protection to get to her therapist journey, she kept off the radar. After learning in the news that Cotton Weary had been found and murdered, the level of panic that shot through her was indescribable. Her fears were coming true. There was another killer in a Ghostface mask hunting. 
She had not remained in Ohio after the murders, though she did often look into crimes there, as though there was still a killer lingering. She had made herself comprehensive reports on each of the killers that she knew of so far from everything that she could find out about them. She had no plans to ever return to Ohio or ever go to California. 
Even as big as it was, knowing Woodsboro was there made the thought of it small. Too small to hide. But, she didn’t want to continue living in her home in Philadelphia, either. Unfortunately, Pennsylvania was beginning to feel too close to Ohio, considering her mounting fears.
The press was romanticizing yet another series of movies surrounding the Stab movie in production, and when she saw Sidney Prescott winding up in the middle of it, Mickey’s voice said in her mind, “She’s still the star!” And Hallie bought herself an RV as soon as she could and began heading away from California and a little further from Ohio, too. 
She was on her way into New Jersey when she learned of a place with a local legendary killer who “Always comes back,” and well, that sounded like the thing she knew about Ghostface. Sidney would kill them and another would arise in his place. “Crystal Lake, I guess I’m coming to visit you..”
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rosemaryhoney27 · 17 days ago
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Quiet Shadows and Loud Secrets
Cassandra Cain had a secret.
It wasn’t the kind of secret that made her blood run cold with fear or her body snap to attention like it did during missions. It was… softer. Stranger. It made her chest feel tight in a way she couldn’t name.
Her secret was named Jazz Fenton.
Cassandra met Jazz by accident—well, not entirely. She’d been slashed up during a particularly rough patrol in Gotham’s East End. Blood dripping, muscles screaming, Cass had made it halfway to one of her usual safe houses before a kid—no more than fifteen—stood in her path holding a crowbar like he wasn’t afraid of the Bat.
“You’re bleeding,” he said. Voice calm. Casual. As if talking to a girl in full tactical gear was normal. “You’ll probably pass out in five more blocks. You should come with me instead. My sister’s in med school.”
Cass didn’t respond out loud—she rarely did—but something in the boy’s body language was familiar. It wasn’t pity. It wasn’t fear. It was… calm competence. So she followed him. Limping.
That was how she ended up in a tiny, mostly clean apartment above a struggling bookstore, with a red-haired woman fussing over her wounds and muttering about trauma sterilization and broken ribs. The girl’s name was Jazz. Her little brother was Danny, and he was watching Cass with a mixture of concern and... understanding.
They didn’t ask who she was. They didn’t try to remove her mask.
They just helped.
Later, when Cass was bandaged and propped up on the couch sipping water with shaking fingers, Jazz sat across from her, shoulders squared in a way Cass recognized—like she was waiting for something. Waiting to see if trust would be returned.
“We’re not exactly normal either,” Jazz said.
Danny snorted. “Understatement.”
Cass tilted her head.
Danny’s eyes glowed green.
“Don’t freak out,” he said. “I’m half-dead. Long story. Ghost powers. No big deal.”
It was a big deal. But it was also... familiar. The feeling of not belonging. Of hiding what you were. Cass nodded slowly.
Trust, silently exchanged.
Cass started visiting more often. It was never planned—she’d just appear near the fire escape and Danny would lift the window like it was a nightly ritual. Jazz would have tea ready. They never pressured her to talk. They let her exist.
Jazz, with her warm laugh and endless psychology textbooks. Danny, with his jittery energy and tendency to float when he got excited. They were odd. Loud. But they made space for her.
And for once, Cassandra didn’t feel like she had to be a weapon all the time.
Of course, she couldn’t keep them a secret forever. Not in her family.
The first to suspect something was Steph.
“You’ve been smiling more. Who is he?” she asked one morning while flipping through Cass’s phone. (Cass had not given permission.)
“It’s not a he,” Cass mumbled.
Stephanie grinned. “Ohhh. A girlfriend?”
Cass didn’t answer, but her ears went red.
Then came Tim, who found ghost residue in the fibers of her cape.
“Cass. Why is there ectoplasm on your suit?”
She just blinked at him.
“…I’m going to run scans,” he muttered.
The final straw was Dick, of course. He followed her when she slipped away from the Cave one night and landed gracefully on the bookstore roof.
He didn’t make his presence known right away. Not until he saw her through the window—out of uniform, curled up on a secondhand couch with a book in her lap, Jazz sitting beside her, Danny asleep upside down in a chair (literally floating).
Cass looked happy.
So he didn’t confront her. Not then.
Later, at family dinner—if you could call the weekly chaos in the Cave’s kitchen a dinner—Dick just said, “Jazz seems nice.”
Cass froze mid-chew.
Damian narrowed his eyes. “Who is Jazz?”
“New best friend,” Steph sang.
“She’s not a vigilante,” Cass said. “She’s... good.”
“And the brother?” Tim added, “The ghost?”
Cass nodded. “Safe. Not dangerous.”
Bruce raised a brow but said nothing.
Damian scowled. “Tch. Suspicious.”
“Adorable,” Steph countered. “I want to meet them.”
Cass groaned.
Eventually, the introductions happened.
Jazz charmed everyone except Damian (who spent most of the evening glaring at Danny and poking him with a Lazarus-infused dagger “for science”). Danny, for his part, took it in stride, phased through the ceiling twice, and stole one of Tim’s grappling guns.
Alfred served tea and said, “It’s good to see you smiling, Miss Cassandra.”
She smiled at him and nodded.
It wasn’t easy, keeping parts of her life separate. But in that living room, with Jazz laughing and Danny making ghost puns while Steph demanded “sister privileges,” Cass realized something important:
Some secrets are worth sharing.
Even in Gotham.
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hoshifighting · 4 months ago
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Salt, Sugar and Everything Us
Synopsis: What do you get when the guy who literally threw salt in your dessert during a Michelin star competition 11 years ago, waltzes up to the door of your NGO like he didn’t ruin your entire life plan back in the day?
WC: 22k
WARNINGS: jihoon and children to heal our souls <3, angst, fluff, references to professional betrayal and its lingering effects, throwing up due to emotional discomfort, moments that may bring up past trauma especially related to rejection or failure, power imbalance.
SMUT WARNINGS: explicit language, penetrative sex, fingering, orgasm denial, overstimulation, semi-public setting, mutual desperation, body fluids (cum)
Manoir = Mansion in french.
NGO = Nonprofit organization that operates independently of any government.
Monsieur = Sir
— // December 2013 // — 
You’re standing in the kitchen, staring at the bright lights overhead, your heart pounding so hard you swear it’s echoing off the marble countertops. The smell of sugar and chocolate floats in the air. You glance over at Jihoon, who’s methodically working on his plate. There’s no denying the guy’s a genius, but damn, does he have to be such an ass about it?
You flash him a shy smile—just a small one. Yeah, it’s a competition, and yeah, only one of you is gonna win and run the four Michelin-star restaurant in Switzerland—the prize of the contest. But like, after this, you’ll still all be chefs. You’ll still work together. You’d all end up in the same world soon enough, working in the same circles, maybe even crossing paths in some fancy kitchen.
Nothing. He doesn’t even look your way.
Fred, the tutor-slash-guardian angel for this trip, the one who dragged you halfway across the world to this kitchen in Europe, warned you. “Jihoon’s tutor hates you,” he had said, voice low like he was telling you some big secret. “It’s ‘cause you’re the only one who can match him. Maybe even beat him.” He had laughed, but it didn’t feel like a joke.
You shake your head and focus on your dessert. Your mousse sits on the plate, the top glistening perfectly under the lights, just the right amount of shine. The swirl of raspberry coulis looks like something out of a cooking magazine. You’re proud of it. Hell, you’re damn proud of it. You step back to admire it, and even the renowned chef standing in front of you—some big-shot Michelin-star guy whose name you can’t even pronounce—gives you a smile. But not a friendly one. More like a don’t get too cocky kind of smile.
And then he tastes it.
His face shifts so fast, your stomach drops. One second, he’s blank, and the next, he’s frowning, like really frowning, staring down at the plate like it face-to-face harmed him. He spits it out, not dramatically, just like he doesn’t wanna cause a scene. The whole kitchen goes quiet. Even the sound of knives chopping stops. You feel the heat crawling up your neck, spreading across your cheeks.
This can’t be happening.
“Did you taste this before serving it?” His voice cuts through the silence like a knife.
Your throat is dry. You swallow, shaking your head slowly. “Uh… no, I—”
“Taste it,” he snaps, holding the spoon out toward you.
Your hands shake as you take the spoon, and before you can think twice, you taste it. The second it hits your tongue, you freeze. 
Salt. Way too much salt. 
It’s fucking disgusting. 
You almost gag, but you force yourself to swallow, blinking fast as your brain tries to process what the hell just happened.
You glance over at Jihoon. He’s standing there, completely expressionless, not even pretending to be interested in the drama unfolding. But you remember. You remember when you left the mousse to rest, just for a minute, and Jihoon had passed by your station. Just a quick brush past, nothing suspicious. Nothing out of place.
Except now, all you can taste is salt.
The chef crosses his arms, still staring at you like he’s waiting for an explanation. You open your mouth, but no words come out. What are you supposed to say? That Jihoon sabotaged your dessert? That you think he did? You glance at him again, and for a split second, his eyes meet yours, and there’s the tiniest hint of a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. Just enough for you to see, before it’s gone.
“Do you have anything to say?” the chef asks, his tone icy.
You swallow again, shaking your head. “No, chef.”
This is it. The final round. Eliminatory. And you’re standing here with a plate of salted mousse because you trusted the wrong person for one damn second. You close your eyes for a brief moment, taking in a breath. You can feel the tension rolling off everyone in the room, and it takes everything in you not to scream.
You watch the chef walk over to Jihoon’s station, his expression already softening. Jihoon’s smiling now—this smug, self-assured grin plastered across his face as if he hadn’t just screwed you over minutes ago. His dessert does look good, though. Annoyingly good. Neat, precise, and probably just sweet enough to charm the hell out of the chef.
The chef takes a bite, nodding as if Jihoon’s dessert just confirmed every expectation. Then, just like that, he moves on, walking away without a second glance at you.
[...]
“Y/N, you’re eliminated. Please leave your apron on the station.”
The words slam into you like a punch, and your stomach twists. You don’t even know how you manage to stay upright, every muscle screaming at you to just collapse. You hear the gasps from the others behind you—your friends, competitors, but friends nonetheless—just as shocked as you are.
“What the fuck?” someone mutters.
“There’s no way…” another voice says, incredulous.
You don’t even turn around. You can’t. Instead, you glance at Fred in the back, your lifeline in this whole chaotic mess. He’s shaking his head, this look of defeat in his eyes that he’s trying so hard to hide. Like even he knew it was over the second Jihoon pulled that bullshit with your dessert.
Fred mouths, That’s it. Let’s go. But his sad eyes tell you everything you need to know. It wasn’t fair. And he knew it. You both knew it.
Swallowing the lump in your throat, you force yourself to walk up to the chef. Your hands are shaking, and you clench your fists, trying to keep it together as you shake his hand. He’s stiff, formal, but you can’t help but notice the faint hint of pity in his eyes.
You avoid it.
When you turn back to your station, the weight of the moment crashes down on you. The stupid fucking apron you worked so hard to wear now feels like it’s burning a hole in your chest. As you reach up to untie it, your chin starts to quiver. You fight it—God, you fight it so hard—but the tears are already pooling in your eyes. This is it. The dream…gone.
Because of salt. Fucking salt.
You fold the apron, mechanical, like maybe if you take your time, this won’t feel so real. But it is. The apron sits on the counter in front of you, this symbol of everything you’ve lost, and you walk away before anyone can see you break.
As soon as you’re backstage, the tears come. Hot and heavy, spilling down your cheeks as you crumble into the arms of one of the friends you’d made here. They’re hugging you tight, whispering things like, “It’s not fair, you didn’t deserve this,” and “You were so close.” Their voice cracks too, sad that they didn’t win either, but it’s different for them. They weren’t robbed. They were sure you had it in the bag.
And then, after what feels like hours, you spot Jihoon again, his face glowing under the lights, a damn set of keys in his hand. The keys to the restaurant. Your restaurant. It should’ve been yours.
You blink through your tears, watching as he basks in the victory. Nothing, absolutely nothing, can take this sting away. This moment is etched into your brain, and you’re certain you’ll never forget it. No matter how much time passes, nothing will make you recover from this.
Leaving Europe had felt like defeat. It wasn’t just a loss on some cooking show—it was like watching a dream you’d nurtured since you were a kid slowly crumple and fade. Back then, you were so young, so full of ambition that your heart couldn’t even contain it all. Every time you thought of that moment, standing in that bright, sterile kitchen as Jihoon held those damn restaurant keys, it was like hearing your inner child sobbing hurtfully inside your eardrums. And that hurt more than you ever expected.
For the longest time, it felt like nothing could fill the void that salty mousse had left behind.
— // A decade later // — 
But life has this weird way of surprising you when you least expect it. Turns out, there were plans far better than Michelin stars waiting for you. Plans you never even imagined, but ones that would heal you in ways a fancy restaurant never could.
It’s the little hands tugging at your apron now that remind you of just how far you’ve come. You’re not standing in some high-end kitchen with a sous-chef barking orders at you, or sweating over the chance to impress another judge. No, you’re standing in a small room, the walls plastered with drawings and messy crayon sketches of cupcakes, pizza slices, and lopsided bowls of spaghetti. Your apron’s a little stained, flour dusting the front of it, but you couldn’t care less.
“Why do you mix it like that?” A curious voice pipes up from below, and you glance down to find a pair of wide, sparkling eyes staring up at you. The flour and eggs in the bowl swirl together under your whisk, creating a soft, smooth batter. The kid—couldn’t be more than six—watches your hands like you’re performing magic.
“Because that’s how you make it fluffy,” you say, smiling as they nod, fascinated. A moment later, you feel tiny arms wrap around your leg, a small hug that makes your heart swell in ways that no standing ovation ever could. It’s innocent, pure, like they’re just happy to be near you, to learn from you.
Another voice chimes in, “How do you know when it’s ready?”
You chuckle, wiping a bit of flour from your forehead with your wrist. “You just know. It feels right.”
They tilt their head, brow furrowing like you’ve just told them some impossible riddle. You laugh softly and let them feel the batter between their fingers, watch as they giggle, amazed at how something so simple can be so right. There’s something about these moments, the curiosity in their eyes, the way they look at you with trust, like you’re some kind of culinary wizard. You weren’t Jihoon with his restaurant keys, and honestly, that’s never been more okay.
Because in these moments, surrounded by kids full of wonder, asking question after question, you realize that no Michelin star could pay for this feeling. There’s a joy here that runs deeper than prestige or recognition. A joy that healed something broken in you.
Your inner child, the one who cried in that cold European kitchen all those years ago, quieted here. She wasn’t crying anymore. She was laughing, learning how to mix flour with eggs, feeling the batter with her hands, like it was something new and wonderful. All those tears you shed for a dream that wasn’t meant for you? They were worth it, because they brought you here—to this.
It’s funny, really. Back then, you thought that only a shining career could fill the emptiness left behind by that loss. But here you are, standing in a room full of kids who look up to you like you’re a hero. And that? That’s priceless.
You’d started this nonprofit, an NGO for kids who didn’t have much, but who had the biggest imaginations you’d ever seen. You taught them to cook, sure, but it wasn’t just about food. It was about creating something with their hands, feeling proud of themselves, and finding a space to be themselves in a world that often made them feel small. Just like how you’d once felt—small, unworthy, like a failure. But now, every smile, every curious question they asked, it stitched up another tear in your heart.
It’s poetic, really. You thought you’d heal by chasing after the dream that slipped through your fingers in that European kitchen. But instead, you found healing in the hands of children, in their endless curiosity, in the way they saw the world full of possibilities. And in doing so, you healed the child inside of you—the one who had dreamed big but didn’t know how to handle disappointment when the dream didn’t come true.
Good things, they say, come to those who wait. And yeah, after everything you’d been through, you could finally see it—really see it. Your name, once tied to that one bitter loss back in 2013, now stood on its own, bold and bright in the culinary world. You weren’t just the kid who lost in Europe anymore. You were someone people sought after, someone who made a difference. The buzz around your NGO had grown so much that, by now, it felt like a new interview request hit your inbox every other day.
It was the fifth time this week you sat down for one.
"Tell us about your journey,” the interviewer smiled, setting the recorder between you both like they were about to hear some untold story. But by now, the story of your journey had become almost second nature. You leaned back in your chair, looking around the space—the walls adorned with photos of smiling kids, famous chefs who had come through your doors, all here to support the cause. This place, this NGO, had become something bigger than you ever imagined.
“Well," you started, a small smile tugging at your lips, “I guess it started with failure.”
That’s how you always began. Not shying away from what happened all those years ago but embracing it, wearing it like a badge of honor. Because, hell, if it hadn’t been for that loss, none of this would exist. Not the kitchen full of kids eager to learn. Not the world-class chefs flying in from every corner of the globe to share their wisdom with them. And certainly not the donations that had been pouring in, enough to keep this place thriving for years.
You ran a hand through your hair, glancing at a nearby photo. It was of you and a group of kids, all in their mini hats, standing next to one of the chefs from some Michelin-starred restaurant. They’d come to volunteer for a day, to give these kids a taste of their future—what could be theirs if they kept going.
“Back then, when I lost, I thought it was the end. But now…” You paused, looking around at the faces of the kids, at the excitement in their eyes as they tried to get their dough just right or figure out the balance between sweet and savory. “Now, I can’t imagine it going any other way. This is where I was meant to be.”
The interviewer nodded, clearly trying to keep up, but you could tell they hadn’t expected the story to take this turn. They probably thought you’d talk about how the loss fueled some revenge arc, a rise to the top, something a bit more dramatic. But the truth? The truth was softer than that, more human.
At this point, most of the world’s top chefs had been here at some point or another. Either they’d come to run a class, spend a day with the kids, or drop by to donate supplies. There was something magical about seeing their eyes light up when they walked through the doors, like they were stepping back into the beginning of their own journey.
“That’s amazing,” the interviewer said, scribbling something down. “You’ve had some huge names come here. What’s it like working alongside these big chefs now?”
You shrugged, letting out a soft laugh. “It’s surreal sometimes. You know, these are people I looked up to, the same ones I’d watch on TV or read about when I was younger, just starting out. And now they’re here, in my kitchen, helping my kids.”
[...]
You were just finishing up, wiping your hands on the towel after the last batch of cookies came out of the oven, when you saw Fred practically running into the kitchen. The grin on his face said it all before he even opened his mouth.
“Fifty grand!” he shouted, stopping just short of knocking over a jar of flour in his excitement.
“Fifty what?” you blinked, thinking you must’ve misheard. Fifty thousand dollars? That was… huge. Massive. Your mind raced, trying to figure out how that could even be possible.
“Yep,” Fred beamed, hands on his knees, trying to catch his breath. “Just got the news from the accountant. Some company called Lee Gastronomy—never heard of ‘em—but they sent the check and a little note saying they’re excited to support the house. Something about moving back to town soon and wanting to visit.”
You felt your heart race as you tugged your apron off, suddenly needing to see the paperwork for yourself. Fifty thousand dollars? That was enough to cover months of supplies, repairs, upgrades—hell, you could finally get that new oven you’d been dreaming about for the kitchen. “Lee?” you frowned, trying to jog your memory. “I don’t know any Lee.”
Fred shrugged, still grinning. “Me either. But who cares, right? We just got fifty grand!”
Even though the number hung in the air like a golden ticket, something felt strange. You didn’t know any Lee. You’d worked in this field long enough to know all the big players—chefs, donors, restaurant owners, food critics—but no one named Lee had ever crossed your path.
The next few days passed, Fred had started spreading the word about the donation, and suddenly, you found yourself knee-deep in logistics. Checking with the accountant, verifying the donation, making sure everything was legit. And yeah, it was. The company’s registration number checked out, the money had cleared, and everything seemed on the up and up. But that name… Lee Gastronomy. It still didn’t ring any bells.
Every time you mentioned it to someone—colleagues, friends, even the chefs who had been visiting the voluntary organization—they’d shake their heads too. No one had ever heard of them. You tried not to dwell on it too much; after all, it was a lot of money, and you had kids to take care of, projects to fund, and kitchens to keep running.
But then, more donations started rolling in.
First, another $10,000 from a small local bakery, then $15,000 from a chef’s association you’d partnered with in the past. Then $25,000 from an anonymous donor who didn’t leave any contact information—just a note saying they loved what you were doing and wanted to help. It felt like the floodgates had opened, and suddenly, people everywhere wanted to support your cause.
Each time, the donations brought a wave of gratitude and hope. The organization was growing faster than you’d ever imagined, and the possibilities felt endless. You could expand the programs, bring in more kids, offer more hands-on experiences with top chefs. And you did just that. You started upgrading the kitchen, organizing new field trips for the kids, even partnering with local schools to expand the reach of your work.
But that nagging feeling in the back of your mind never quite went away.
“Fred,” you said one afternoon as you both sat in the office, going over the latest set of donations, “Do you think it’s weird that all this is happening right after Lee Gastronomy showed up?”
Fred paused, leaning back in his chair. “I mean, maybe a little? But honestly, I just think word is spreading. People are seeing what we’re doing, and they want to help.”
“Yeah, maybe.” You nodded, but your gut told you there was more to it.
The next week, another $30,000 came in. The donation slip was clean, but again, no name. No big donor stepping out of the shadows to claim credit for it. Just money pouring into your NGO like it was destined for you, and yet, you couldn’t figure out why it was all happening now.
[...]
The early morning air was cool as you bent down, adjusting the vases of flowers in front of the organization beautiful entrance. The kids wouldn’t arrive for another hour, and this was your moment of calm. A moment to breathe before the chaos of the day began. Today, your mind was occupied with the meeting you’d been anticipating for weeks.
Lee Gastronomy.
Whoever this mysterious benefactor was, they were finally coming to visit. You’d replayed the moment in your head a hundred times—meeting them, shaking their hand, expressing your endless gratitude. You wanted to make a good impression, show them what their generous donations had been doing. You straightened up, brushing off your pants, when the sound of footsteps on the pavement caught your attention. Two pairs of Gucci shoes appeared in your view, black leather, polished, expensive. The kind of shoes that had power written all over them.
You lifted your head, the best smile already set on your face. "Oh, you must be Lee! I—" The words stuck in your throat.
The face staring back at you wasn’t some stranger. It was him.
Jihoon. Lee? Lee Jihoon?
Your breath tied, and for a second, everything around you disappeared. It was like time rewound itself to that kitchen in Europe, to the sharp look in his eyes as the corners of his mouth twitched into that subtle, knowing smirk. He was older now, more mature. His face had lost some of its softness, replaced with sharper angles, and yet… the eyes. You’d never forget those eyes. You couldn’t.
“Jihoon?” You muttered, like saying his name would break the reality in front of you.
Jihoon’s expression didn’t change much, but there was a faint smile on his lips. Fred, who had been standing beside you, froze. You could feel his tension, the silent question hanging in the air. He had no idea how you’d react. Hell, you didn’t even know how you’d react.
Everything came flooding back.
The way Jihoon had smirked as you stood there, staring down at your ruined dessert in disbelief. The way his fingers had curled around the restaurant’s keys, how he’d accepted his victory without so much as a glance your way. That little mole near his eye, the one you’d stared at for hours during the competition, watching it crinkle when he frowned or smiled—always at your expense.
You felt it then. The taste. That same, cursed taste of salt rising in the back of your throat. Your body tensed, memories crashing into you with such force it made you dizzy. You felt sick. So, so sick, that you feel like you are about to—
Your hand shot up to cover your mouth, and before you could stop yourself, you were rushing inside the house, pushing past Fred, not even sparing a glance back at Jihoon. The nausea was enormous, the weight of the past pulling at your gut, twisting it into knots. You barely made it to the bathroom, dropping to your knees in front of the toilet, just in time for everything to spill out of you.
Fred was right behind you, voice panicked. “Y/N! Hey, hey, it's okay, I’m here.” He knelt beside you, gently pulling your hair back, trying to keep you steady as your body trembled.
You could hear the distant sound of Jihoon’s shoes shifting in the doorway. He hadn’t followed you in. He didn’t move. He just stood there. Watching.
Jihoon stood, frozen at the threshold, his sharp eyes narrowing ever so slightly as Fred’s frantic voice echoed from inside. His assistant, standing beside him, looked equally stunned.
Were you this disgusted by him? To the point of throwing up? Jihoon wondered. He didn’t speak. He didn’t call out to you. Instead, he just stared at the open door, his fingers twitching at his sides as if he wanted to reach for something but couldn’t figure out what. The sound of you retching filled the air, and for a moment, he felt it too—a strange, bitter taste creeping up the back of his own throat.
This wasn’t how he imagined seeing you again.
Fred’s voice was soft behind you, concern threaded through his words. “Do you want me to ask him to leave?”
You shook your head, still gripping the edge of the sink like it could anchor you back to reality. “No. Just... give me a few minutes.”
He didn’t argue. You heard his footsteps fade as he hurried to welcome Jihoon and his assistant. You stayed there for another few seconds, staring at your own reflection. Your face had fallen so fast, drained of all that confidence you’d tried to wear this morning. You brushed your teeth with shaky hands, telling yourself to calm down, to just be serene.
Just get through this. You took a deep breath and headed to the waiting room.
Jihoon and his assistant were seated, quiet, as if they hadn’t said much since Fred greeted them. You couldn’t bring yourself to shake his hand, so you bowed politely instead, keeping your hands clasped behind your back. You felt Jihoon’s eyes on you, but you didn’t look at him. Couldn’t. 
His assistant, a bright-eyed young man who didn’t seem to sense the tension in the air, smiled warmly. “It’s such an honor to finally meet you in person. Jihoon has told me a lot about the great work you're doing here,” he said, looking genuinely impressed.
You forced a smile, keeping your tone professional. “Thank you. We’re really grateful for all the donations, it’s made a huge difference. The kids... they’ve benefited so much.”
Jihoon’s assistant continued, eyes flicking between you and Fred, clearly excited to be there. “And it’s amazing how far you’ve come since your days in the competition. It must’ve been so tough, especially considering how—”
The room froze. You felt Fred tense beside you, his polite smile flickering, your breath catching in your throat. Even Jihoon’s expression shifted, his face hardening as he quickly looked away, avoiding your gaze entirely.
His assistant, oblivious, continued. “I mean, you two were so competitive back then, huh? And to think, all of this came from that one event—”
Fred cleared his throat sharply, cutting him off, but the damage was already done, his assistant clearly didn't know how Jihoon won. How much does he know? Does he even realize what he’s saying?
“Ah, well—” Fred began.
Jihoon cut him off, voice tight and low. “It’s… a long story.”
Before anyone could say more, the sound of laughter and tiny footsteps echoed down the hallway, saving you from the suffocating silence. The children had arrived.
Fred turned to greet them, and you stepped aside, watching as they rushed into the room, immediately diffusing the tension. They swarmed around you, bright-eyed and smiling, some of the little ones immediately latching onto your legs, asking if they could help in the kitchen today. You smiled softly, crouching down to ruffle their hair.
But then, some of them turned their attention to Jihoon.
Two of the kids, a boy and a girl, who couldn’t have been older than five, ran straight for him, hugging his legs like they’d known him forever. Jihoon stiffened at first, unsure how to respond, but the shock quickly melted as he crouched down, a small, genuine smile tugging at his lips. You noticed how different it looked from the smirk that used to haunt you.
"Who’s this?" one of the kids asked, looking up at Jihoon with wide, curious eyes.
You exhaled softly, your hands clenching and unclenching behind your back as you felt Fred’s eyes on you. You forced yourself to speak, turning to the kids, your voice softening, sweeter for them. “He’s a really good chef,” you explained, keeping it simple. “He has a biiiig restaurant in Switzerland.”
The younger ones gasped in awe, their faces lighting up as they hugged him tighter. "Wooooow," one of them breathed, eyes wide. “Is Switzerland far?”
You couldn’t help but smile. “Yeah, it’s pretty far,” you said with a small scoff. It was cute how they clung to him without knowing anything about the man he was. How they immediately trusted him just because you said he was a chef, because in their world, chefs were superheroes who made magic with food.
But you didn’t miss the sound of the older kids behind you. Some of the pre-teens had recognized him. Their whispers were loud enough for you to catch, little gasps of “That’s Jihoon!” and “Oh my god, isn’t he, like, super famous?”
One of the girls, barely fourteen, looked at you with shining eyes. “You know Jihoon? Like, Jihoon Jihoon?”
You managed a nod, the tight smile still on your lips. “Yeah, I know him.”
Jihoon, standing there with the kids hugging him, stayed silent, his eyes drifting to you every now and then but never lasting. He looked uncomfortable. Maybe even lost. You wondered if he’d thought about this moment before—if he’d imagined what it would be like to see you again after all these years. Or if, like you, he hadn’t been ready at all.
You cleared your throat, trying to regain control of the situation. “Alright, kids, let’s give our guest some space,” you said gently, guiding them away from Jihoon’s legs. “We’ve got a lot of work to do today, and I’m sure Chef Jihoon is going to want to take a look around.”
The younger ones reluctantly let go, giggling as they scampered off to join their friends. 
You smiled softly when you saw Jihoon’s assistant already in the thick of it, playing with the kids like he'd been there for weeks. His laughter mixed with theirs, easy and carefree. 
But then you turned, eyes flicking to Jihoon, who was still standing awkwardly at the edge of the room, like he wasn’t sure what to do next. You called his name quietly, over your shoulder, “Jihoon, come on.”
He dawdled but followed. As he walked toward you, you tied the apron behind your back like you had eyes on your hands, the kids gathering around the kitchen counter, their eyes wide with interest. Jihoon stayed a few steps behind, unsure of how to approach this situation—teaching kids was never something he'd done. Hell, it wasn’t even in his plans for the day.
But he remembered being the kid, the one sitting in front of a chef, hungry for knowledge and desperate to learn everything.
You leaned against the counter, your arms crossed as you gave him a sideways glance. “Do you guys know what Chef Jihoon is going to teach us today?”
The kids chorused a loud, excited “Noooo!” bouncing on their heels.
You turned fully to him, holding his gaze. He swallowed hard, suddenly feeling like the spotlight was burning on him.
“I’ll let Chef Jihoon tell you then,” you said, challenging, like you were throwing him into the deep end on purpose. You wanted to see him squirm, maybe just a little.
Jihoon glanced at the eager faces in front of him, then back to you. His throat felt dry as he tried to come up with something to say, but for a second, all he could hear was the hum of his own nerves. The last time he had been in a kitchen like this, it wasn’t full of small hands and bright eyes—it was full of pressure, competition, and an entirely different energy.
But he wasn’t about to let you see him hesitate. He cleared his throat and stepped up to the counter, taking a deep breath before speaking.
“Well,” he started, a small, almost shy smile tugging at the corner of his mouth, “I think today... we’ll be learning how to make something really special. Something I first learned when I was just starting out.”
He shot a quick look at you, and you could tell from the flicker in his eyes that he was stepping back into habitat. You smirked, leaning back against the counter as he continued.
“Let's make risotto… How's that sound?”
​​The kids’ faces immediately dropped, little frowns forming as they shook their heads. “We already know that one!” one of them piped up, crossing his arms, indignant. “Chef Y/N taught us already!”
You couldn’t help it—a laugh escaped, filling the room, and Jihoon shot you a sidelong look, his own lips twitching like he was fighting not to falter. Of course they already knew risotto. You’d practically burned through every recipe in the book with them.
Jihoon looked at the kids again, genuinely surprised. “Really?” He raised his eyebrows. “You already know how to make risotto?”
They nodded, several of them bouncing with pride. “Chef Y/N is really good!” a little girl said.
Jihoon’s expression softened, the faintest hint of surprise in his eyes as he took it in. He took a breath, thinking, before a sudden idea sparked across his face. “Alright, then. What about soufflé?”
The kids’ eyes widened, jaws dropping as they exchanged glances. “A soufflé?” one of the older kids asked, almost disbelieving. “Like the one in movies?”
Jihoon nodded, his face a little smug. “Yeah. It’s tricky, but I think you guys are up for it.”
One of the kids tugged at your sleeve, whispering, “Chef Y/N, do you think we can really make soufflés?”
You smiled, glancing at Jihoon. “With a chef like Jihoon teaching you? I think you can do anything.”
You and Jihoon began laying out the ingredients on the counter. Flour, sugar, butter, eggs—every item carefully arranged in neat little bowls. Then, stepping back, you let the kids gather around as Jihoon took his place at the front, an eyebrow raised in question.
“You’re not going to help me?”
You smirked, crossing your arms as you leaned against the wall behind the children. “Nope. I’m here to learn too.”
He let out a scoff, but his eyes were amused. Reaching for a whisk, Jihoon’s fingers stopped as he noticed the brightly-colored utensils on the countertop—handles painted in cheerful blues, yellows, and pinks, completely different from the pristine silver ones he’d grown so used to in the rigid, professional kitchens. 
His brow twitched, a bit thrown off, but he picked up a neon pink whisk, holding it up almost in disbelief before he finally began mixing, putting on the best show of professionalism he could manage with a grin sneaking in.
The kids were entranced as he worked. He answered each of their questions, even the simple ones—What’s this do? Why are eggs so runny? Is soufflé really magic? He gave patient answers, a spark in his eyes as he watched their faces light up with each response.
When he was done, a perfect, puffy soufflé stood in the middle of the counter. Golden, light, and exactly what you’d expect from someone with his skill. The kids were practically bouncing in excitement.
“Alright, your turn,” Jihoon said, stepping back and motioning for them to take over.
You paired up with a small boy, who looked completely intimidated by the fluffy soufflé sitting next to him. “I can’t make it like that,” he whispered to you.
You knelt down next to him, helping him break the eggs with careful hands, showing him how to separate the whites, then guiding his little hand as he whisked. “Doesn’t matter if it’s perfect,” you told him with a warm smile. “Just give it your best shot.”
Meanwhile, Jihoon crouched down beside a little girl who was struggling to mix the eggs. Her arm had started to tremble, the bowl wobbling in her hands.
“Here, I’ll help you,” he said, holding the bowl steady with one hand while he took the whisk with the other. “Let’s mix it together.”
The smile that spread across Jihoon’s face as he watched her efforts, a real, genuine smile that you hadn’t seen in years, softened something in—No. Hell no. Back to the recipe.
When the kids finally placed their soufflés in the oven, the results were… varied. Some soufflés rose tall and proud, while others sagged or deflated at the edges. One came out a bit lopsided, and another had been forgotten for a moment, the top a little browned, but that didn’t matter. They each wore their own version of pride on their faces, and you couldn’t help but feel it too.
Jihoon looked at the table, and shook his head, smiling. “They’re perfect,” he murmured, glancing at the children with an approval nod. 
As the kids eagerly dug into their soufflés, one of the smaller boys took a big spoonful, his eyes lighting up at first. But then his face scrunched, his little nose wrinkling as he swallowed. He put his spoon down, looking directly at you with a distressed expression.
“Did I… put salt instead of sugar?” His lip started to tremble as he looked between you and Jihoon, mortified.
You froze. But before you could say anything, Jihoon, leaning against the counter with his arms crossed, looked up, his eyes darting from the kid’s teary face to your stiff expression. The moment seemed to snap him to life, and he quickly sprang forward, kneeling down beside the boy, hands shaking in a mad rush.
“Hey, hey, don’t cry!” Jihoon said. He took the boy’s tiny hand in his. “There are tons of salty soufflés! I actually make one all the time. In my restaurant, it’s super fancy, with cheese and herbs, just like this one.”
The boy looked up, sniffling, his tears slowing a little. “Really? There’s… supposed to be salt?”
Jihoon nodded enthusiastically, glancing back at you as if asking for backup. “Absolutely! Chef Y/N could tell you all about it.” He shot you a look, almost saying like: What do I do now?
Taking a shaky breath, you knelt down beside the boy, putting a hand on his shoulder. “I think it’s a great first try.” You ruffled his hair, seeing him perk up a bit.
Jihoon took a spoonful of the soufflé and tasted it, giving an exaggerated nodl. “Mm! It's really good!” He winked at the boy, who finally cracked a shy smile. 
You watched with a small smile as each kid left with a bit of your heart in tow, feeling the echo of their laughter around you even as the room began to empty.
Fred lingered by the door, chatting with Jihoon’s assistant, while you and Jihoon moved to the side, staying silent, as if words would disturb whatever fragile peace had been built between you during the day. It felt strange, standing there beside him without the buffer of the kids to fill in the pauses.
Jihoon broke the silence first, clearing his throat softly. “I wanted to talk to you… I think my team and I would really love to support your organization long-term… Make it official, if you’d be interested. We could even bring some of the chefs, host classes, give the kids more to look forward to.”
“I appreciate the donation,” you began carefully measured. “I really do. But I need to be honest, Jihoon. I don’t want this house to lose what makes it special, what makes it ours. I don’t want it to turn into some… shiny project to impress donors or pull in crowds. It’s supposed to feel like us, like the kids. Not some big production.”
After a pause, he let out a soft hum, tilting his head slightly. “And what’s wrong with improving things? Giving the kids access to better resources, better… training?”
There it was—his tone wasn’t outright disdainful or insulting, but there was a bite to it, something faintly snobbish that made your stomach churn. You could feel Fred tense slightly beside you, the way his shoulders shifted like he wanted to step in but wasn’t sure if he should. Jihoon’s assistant, meanwhile, raised an eyebrow, clearly taken aback by his boss’s words.
You scoffed. “Better training?” you repeated, folding your arms. “Is that what you think this is about? You think just because this isn’t the fancy kitchen you grew up in—or whatever perfect, silver-lined school taught you—you have the right to waltz in here and act like this isn’t good enough?”
Jihoon opened his mouth, but you didn’t let him speak. The floodgates were open now, the words spilling out of you like they’d been waiting years. “I learned to cook in a place like this,” you said firmly, jabbing a finger toward the counters, the bright utensils, the slightly battered cutting boards. “And guess what? It brought me to the same competition as you. So don’t stand there and act like these kids need some ‘upgrade’ to be worthy of your world.” 
Fred's face went pale as he looked at you.
“You’re too busy chasing Michelin stars to see what really makes cooking special.” You spat.
Jihoon’s assistant visibly winced, and Fred looked at you with wide eyess. 
Jihoon, though, didn’t react right away. He just stood there, his hands clenching slightly at his sides. “Is that what you think? That I came here just to… what? Smudge this in your face?”
It wasn’t until Fred gently touched your elbow that you realized how tense you were, your hands clenched your crossed arms. You took a breath.
“I don’t know why you came here,” you admitted finally, your voice softer now but no less firm. “But if you’re here to help, then help. Don’t stand there and tell me what this place is lacking. Because it’s got something no five-star kitchen could ever give you.”
He just nodded once. His assistant looked like he wanted to crawl into the floor, and Fred let out a low sigh, clearly debating whether to step in again.
Finally, Jihoon spoke, “I’m not here to tear this place down,” he said. “But if I’m going to help, I need to know how. You think I don’t understand what makes this place special? Fine. Show me then.”
Fred cleared his throat awkwardly, stepping in to break the silence. “Maybe we should, uh, pick this up another day?” he suggested, glancing between you and Jihoon. Neither of you responded. Enough for now.
You watched Jihoon step into the car, the heavy door closing with a muffled thud. From the front window, you could see him lean back against the seat, his face partially obscured by the tinted glass. His assistant was halfway to the car when he stopped, paused mid-step, and turned back toward you.He turned slow, really slow, like he’d been debating this for a while and finally made up his mind.
You raised an eyebrow as he approached, his blond hair catching the light “Chef Y/N,” he began, his voice sweet, with a thick French accent. His hands reached out to clasp yours—oddly personal. “I hope you’ll excuse me for interrupting, but… I wanted to say I’m sorry. For everything today.”
His words took you off guard, and your brow furrowed slightly. 
He sighed, the kind of long, exasperated exhale that suggested he’d had this conversation—or at least a version of it—with Jihoon before.
“Monsieur Lee,” he said carefully, “was truly excited to visit your NGO. It has been all he talks about since we first began planning this trip. But, you know him… he doesn’t always measure his words. He means well, but he can come off as—how do you say it?—impolite.”
You huffed a small, mirthless laugh. “That’s one way to put it.”
The assistant smiled faintly, “I hope you don’t let it affect your view of his intentions. He genuinely respects what you have built here. I’ll make sure to put some sense into his head, I promise. But please, don’t forget about our offer. It’s a good one, and I think… deep down, Monsieur Lee truly believes in what you’re doing here. Even if he doesn’t always know how to say it.”
You held his gaze, searching his expression for any sign of insincerity, but found none. He was genuine, you could tell. After a moment, you gave his hands a light squeeze and nodded. “I’ll think about it,” you said softly. “But this place… it’s not just about the offer. It’s personal to me. If I do decide to work with you all, it has to be on my terms.”
“Of course!” he said immediately, his smile growing. “And that is as it should be. Thank you for considering it.”
With that, he let go of your hands and returned to the car, leaving you standing there in the fading light. Jihoon didn’t look up as the car pulled away, while you looked until it disappeared down the road.
The days after Jihoon’s visit were surprisingly quiet, almost too quiet. You’d half-expected a deluge of follow-ups or more awkward exchanges, but instead, you found yourself with space to think. The children, as always, were a welcome distraction. They filled the kitchen with their laughter and the occasional misstep, their joy a constant reminder of why you’d built this house in the first place.
Still, Jihoon lingered in the back of your mind. His presence at the NGO had stirred up so many old emotions. Every time you thought about his assistant’s words, you felt a strange knot of uncertainty in your chest. Was it possible that Jihoon’s intentions weren’t as cold as they’d seemed? Could you trust him to help without losing the heart of what you’d created?
One evening, Fred found you sitting at your desk, staring blankly at a stack of donation forms. “You okay?” he asked, leaning against the doorway.
You shrugged. “Just thinking.”
“About Jihoon?”
You shot him a look, and he grinned. “Come on,” he said. “You’ve been quiet since he left. I can tell he got under your skin.”
“Maybe,” you admitted. “It’s just… complicated. He said some things that really pissed me off, but his assistant made a good point. I don’t know, Fred. I don’t want to make the wrong decision.”
Fred crossed his arms, considering your words. “Look, I don’t know Jihoon like you do. But from what I’ve seen, he’s not the same guy he was back then. Maybe give him a chance to prove that.”
A week later, Jihoon showed up again, this time without his assistant. You spotted him standing awkwardly at the front gate, a bag slung over his shoulder. He looked out of place, like he didn’t quite know what to do with himself.
“Back so soon?” you called out, walking toward him.
He turned, his eyes meeting yours. “I wanted to talk. Without the… entourage.”
You raised an eyebrow but gestured for him to follow you inside. The two of you sat in the empty kitchen, the late afternoon sun streaming through the windows. Jihoon placed the bag on the counter and pulled out a small box. “I brought something for the kids,” he said, opening it to reveal a set of beautifully crafted utensils, each one colorful and child-sized.
You blinked in surprise, your defenses momentarily lowering. “These are… amazing.”
“I thought they might like them,” he said, his voice quieter now. “And I thought maybe I could help more, if you’ll let me.”
You hesitated, studying his expression. There was no trace of the condescension you’d seen before.
[...]
The sound of running water filled the quiet kitchen, punctuated by the clink of dishes being handed off between you and Jihoon. The day had been long, the kind of long that left you too tired to think straight but restless enough to keep moving. You focused on scrubbing the edges of a baking dish, the suds thick around your fingers, and handed it to Jihoon without a glance. His fingers brushed yours as he took it, pausing more than he should. You pulled back instinctively, grabbing the next plate before he could say anything.
Jihoon sighed, turning toward the wide window above the sink. The last light of the day was fading, casting a soft orange glow over the room. He dried the dish slowly, as if trying to draw out the moment. 
“You’ll never forgive me, will you?”
The question stopped you in your tracks. You placed the plate you were washing back into the sink and leaned forward, gripping the edge of the counter. The bubbles clung to your hands, foam dripping down to the marble. You stared at the suds for a moment, your mind swirling, before you turned your head slightly toward him.
“I never heard a sorry leave your mouth, Jihoon.” Your gaze shifted to the window, avoiding his reflection.
“I didn’t think it would matter,” he admitted. “I thought… what’s the point? Saying sorry wouldn’t change anything.”
You let out a bitter laugh, shaking your head. “You thought what? You think you can just show up here, give donations, play nice with the kids, and everything gets wonderful well?”
Jihoon’s jaw tightened. “It’s not like that.”
“Then what is it like?” You crossed your arms, still feeling the slickness of the detergent on your skin. “Because from where I’m standing, it looks a lot like you trying to fix something without actually addressing the damage you caused.”
You opened your mouth to continur, but he cut you off. “What am I supposed to do, huh? Go back in time? Undo it? All I can do is try to make up for it now, and if that’s not good enough for you, then tell me what the hell I’m supposed to do.”
The frustration in his voice caught you off guard, but you didn’t let it show. “You don’t get to decide how or when I forgive you, Jihoon. That’s not how this works. And for the record, no, you can’t undo it. You can’t take back the way you made me feel that day.”
He flinched at your words but didn’t look away. “I know. I know I can’t.”
You shook your head. “And yet here you are, acting like showing up and playing nice will fix it all. Like you can just… sweep it under the rug.”
“I’m not trying to sweep it under the rug. I’m trying to be better. To show you that I’ve changed.”
You go back to the dishes. The water ran over your hands as you scrubbed a stubborn stain on the bottom of a pot, the bubbles swirling down the drain. Jihoon stood beside you, methodically drying the dishes and placing them on the counter without a word.
But something twisted in your gut, you swallowed hard, the weight of the past pressing on your chest. Your voice, when it finally came out, was quiet, and more fragile than you wanted to sound.
“Why the salt?”
Jihoon froze mid-motion, the towel in his hands slipping slightly. You didn’t look at him, your eyes fixed on the pot as if it held all the answers you’d been seeking.
“Why did you do this to me Jihoon?”
He exhaled shakily, his knuckles white as he gripped the counter. It wasn’t just your question—it was the way you’d asked, like a small, innocent version of yourself had reached through the years to speak, like spiritually, your inner child canalized her voice to his ears. Jihoon felt it deep in his chest, an ache that mirrored yours. It was as though the girl you’d been when you first started chasing this dream was standing there, demanding an explanation he’d never given. He swallowed hard, his throat dry.
“I…” he started but faltered, running a hand through his hair, his voice dropped. “I didn’t… mean for it to be like that.”
You set the pot down, water dripping from your hands as you turned to him. Your eyes searched his face, looking for something—remorse, understanding, anything. “Then why? Why did you do it? Was it just… some sick joke to you?” Your voice wavered, and you blinked quickly, trying to keep the tears at bay. “Do you know what that did to me? What it felt like to watch—” You stopped, your words catching in your throat.
Jihoon closed his eyes, pressing his palms flat against the counter as if steadying himself. He felt sick, the kind of sickness that sat heavy in his chest and made it hard to breathe. “It wasn’t… it wasn’t my idea,” he said finally, his voice strained.
You frowned, your confusion evident. “What do you mean it wasn’t your idea?”
He turned to you then, his expression torn, guilt scripted all over his face. “It was my tutor’s idea,” he admitted, his words tumbling out like they’d been locked up for too long. “He… he told me to do it. Said it would make me stand out, give me an edge. He thought sabotaging someone else would make me look stronger. And I was—” He broke off, running a hand over his face. “I was stupid enough to listen.”
Your stomach churned, the twist in your gut tightening. “Your tutor?” you repeated, the disbelief clear in your voice.
Jihoon nodded, his eyes, pained. “He was more than just a tutor. He became my business partner after the competition. He was the one who pushed me toward the restaurant, who built me up to be this… this thing I didn’t even recognize anymore.” He let out a bitter laugh, shaking his head. “And now…I can’t stand him. He’s why I’m back here. I couldn’t take it anymore. The way he runs things, the way he manipulates people—it was eating me alive.”
You stared at him, your mind spinning. “So you’re saying… you did it because he told you to?”
“Yes.. But I chose to do it. I could’ve said no. I should’ve said no. I was just so… desperate to prove myself, to win, to be the best.” He paused, his jaw tightening. “And I didn’t care who I hurt along the way.”
The importance of his confession lolled in the air. You turned your back to the sink. “I kept asking myself, What did I do wrong? And all the while, it was you.” Your voice cracked, and you hated how weak you sounded.
“I know, I know, and I’ll never forgive myself for it. Seeing you crying that day… it still haunts me. And when I saw you throw up when I came here, I realized just how deeply I’d hurt you. I…” He trailed off, his eyes glistening. “I can’t undo it. I know I can’t. But I’m trying to make it right. I just want you to know… I’m sorry. For everything. And I’ll keep saying it until it means something.”
“So…” you started, leaning back against the counter as you dried your hands on a towel. “You left a Michelin-starred restaurant behind? All of it?”
Jihoon nodded, like a weight had been partially lifted.
You raised an eyebrow, crossing your arms. “And now that you don’t have it, you want this to be yours too? The house?”
He let out a scoff, but it wasn’t sharp like before, it was straight funny. “You could’ve had both,” he countered, tilting his head. “A Michelin-starred restaurant and this. I could never.”
You couldn’t help but hold back a small smile, shaking your head. 
The corner of his mouth tugged upward in a small, genuine smile. Then he extended his hand, palm open, toward you. “Come on,” he said softly.
You glanced at his hand, then back at his face, narrowing your eyes. “What are you doing?”
“Offering a truce,” he replied. “Come on. You can’t make me stand here forever.”
For a second, you hesitated, looking at his hand again. With a resigned sigh, you dried your hands fully, reaching out to take his. Your grip was firm.
But you couldn’t help it. “You sure you want to start here? With that hair?” You gestured to his slightly mussed locks, which looked more chaotic than usual after hours in the kitchen. “You’ve been running from Michelin stars, but your hair looks like it’s been running from a comb.”
Jihoon froze for a second, then let out a genuine laugh, his head tilting back slightly. It was the first time you’d heard it that day, and it made something inside you soften.
“Don’t think the kids haven’t noticed. One of them asked if you were cosplaying as a hedgehog earlier.”
Jihoon smiled wide, almost beaming, though he tried to downplay it by scratching the back of his neck. “Alright, alright. I get it. Point taken. But you know, I think they like me.”
“They tolerate you,” you corrected, smirking. “Big difference. You’re still on trial here, Jihoon.”
He pressed his free hand dramatically to his chest. “Tolerate me? That hurts, Y/N. I thought I had charm.”
“You’ve got something,” you teased, releasing his hand to grab another dish towel. “I’ll let you know what it is once I figure it out.”
Jihoon leaned against the counter, his eyes softening as he watched you. “You’ll let me know, huh? That sounds fair.”
Jihoon’s attempts to help with the house didn’t feel like an intrusion anymore.
A few days later, Jihoon was sitting cross-legged on the floor with a group of kids, trying to teach them a few basic culinary techniques. His patience was better than you’d expected, though he still had moments where he looked at you like: How do you deal with this every day?
“Chef Jihoon, is this how you hold the whisk?” one of the smaller kids asked, holding it in a fist like a sword.
“No, not unless you’re planning to fight your eggs,” Jihoon replied, gently adjusting the child’s grip. “Like this. Light, but firm.”
You stood nearby, arms crossed, watching the scene unfold. Fred sidled up beside you, nodding toward Jihoon. “He’s really trying, huh?”
“Yeah,” you said quietly. “He is.”
As the session wrapped up, Jihoon caught your eye from across the room. He raised an eyebrow, as if silently asking for your approval. You pretended to consider, then gave a small nod. His lips twitched upward, satisfied.
Jihoon had never considered himself great with kids.
He wasn’t the type of uncle who could entertain nieces and nephews for hours without breaking a sweat, like his friend Seungkwan. Yet, here he was, surrounded by giggling children who hung on his every word—and he had to admit, it wasn’t as terrifying as he’d thought. 
He’d found himself loving this. The chaos, the noise, the silly little moments. The kids, with their endless energy and bright smiles, were teaching him things he never thought he would learn. They were curing him in ways he never imagined.
Jihoon couldn’t hide the change in his mood when the kids started leaving for the day. They’d crowded around the door, each of them getting picked up by their parents, giving their final hugs, running out of the kitchen, their little hands waving goodbye. Jihoon stood in the doorway, watching them, his gaze soft. He didn’t admit it out loud, but there was something about seeing the kids leave that made him feel a little emptier inside. Maybe it was because he could feel the bond forming between them even though they’d only spent a short time together.
“Are you really sulking now?” you asked, walking past him to grab the last dish from the counter.
He didn’t turn around, but you could see the slight pout on his lips. “No,” he mumbled, hands stuffed in the pockets of his apron. “I just... I’m not used to saying goodbye. Even if I’m going to see them again tomorrow.”
You chuckled, watching him—you've found yourself in this situation multiple times at the beginning. “It’s fine, Jihoon. You’re just getting attached.”
He shot you a side-eye, as if daring you to make fun of him. “I’m not attached.” he muttered, crossing his arms. 
“Yeah, yeah, sure.” You teased, nudging him lightly with your shoulder as you moved to the other side of the kitchen to help clean up. “You’ve become one of them now. A softie.”
[...]
The kitchen had never felt more alive than it does today. Jihoon, who had never been particularly fond of chaos, was smiling—almost laughing—while keeping his eyes on the counter. It was supposed to be a “friendly” competition between the boys and girls, but honestly, it was just an excuse to see how much you and Jihoon could handle before the chaos completely overtook you. And right now, it was clear neither of you were winning.
You stood on the boys’ side of the kitchen, trying to keep them from getting too rowdy as they threw flour at each other in some misguided attempt to "season" their dishes. On the other side, Jihoon was managing the girls, who, much to his dismay, were doing exactly what you expected them to do.
Jihoon stood there in your pink apron, his now short hair practically glistening with glittering accessories—tiny scrunchies, little clips holding stray locks back—making him look like the type of man who should’ve been anywhere but in a kitchen with a bunch of kids.
One of the girls tugged at Jihoon’s sleeve. “Chef Jihoon, can you stir this? It’s too heavy!” she whined, her small hands gripping the bowl.
“Of course,” Jihoon said, crouching slightly to be at her level, but not before side-eyeing you. “Unlike someone,” he said with mock emphasis, “I don’t leave my team hanging.”
You gasped dramatically from across the kitchen. “Excuse me, Chef Lee, but my boys are doing just fine, thank you very much!”
Jihoon smirked as he whisked the batter.
A few minutes later, the competition was in full swing, and the teasing between the kids was relentless. Every now and then, you had to intervene.
“Chef Y/N, Chef Jihoon’s team says our cookies will burn!” one of the boys pouted, pointing accusingly at Jihoon’s side of the kitchen.
You shot Jihoon a glare. “Chef Lee, are you sabotaging my team’s confidence?”
Jihoon feigned innocence, holding up his hands. “Sabotage? I would never,” he said, though his smirk betrayed him.
“Uh-huh,” you replied, narrowing your eyes. You crouched to whisper conspiratorially to the boys, loud enough for Jihoon to hear. “Don’t worry, kids. His cookies will taste like his personality—bitter.”
At one point, Jihoon crossed behind you to grab a pan, but instead of taking the wide-open space on the other side, he chose to squeeze behind you in the narrow gap between the counters.
“Excuse me,” he murmured, voice low and entirely unnecessary given the proximity. His hand brushed your waist as he reached past you, and you stiffened, gripping the spoon in your hand tighter.
“There’s a whole kitchen, Jihoon,” you scolded, trying to keep your voice steady. “Why are you in my personal space?”
He bit his bottom lip, as he moved away, holding the pan. “Just testing the waters. Seems warm.”
You huffed, trying to ignore the heat creeping up your neck. “Go test the waters on your side of the kitchen before I throw you in the sink.”
He laughed, a soft, melodic sound that you hated how much you were starting to like. “Alright, alright. Don’t get flustered, Chef Y/N. I’ll behave.”
Later, you decided to up the teasing as revenge. Jihoon was bent over, helping one of the girls pour batter into a mold. You leaned close to him, hand on his back, making his back stiff under your hand. 
You scoff, your breath tickling his ear. “Careful, Chef Lee. Don’t spill. That would ruin your team’s reputation.”
Jihoon fumbled with the mold, nearly spilling the batter as he straightened up abruptly. He shot you a look, his cheeks faintly pink. “Very funny.” he muttered, grabbing the whisk with a little too much force, the batter splattering slightly.
The kids were oblivious to the Chef's bickering, fully focused on their creations. The teasing continued until the final moments, each team plating their cookies and presenting them proudly.
By the end of the competition, the kids were giggling and cheering as Fred and Jihoon’s assistant judged the dishes. Jihoon stood beside you, both of you wiping flour off your hands as the verdict was announced: a tie.
You stood beside Jihoon as the kids debated whose cookies looked better. He leaned closer to you, his voice low enough that only you could hear. “You know, you’re lucky there’s no actual judging panel. My team would wipe the floor with yours.”
You shot him a playful glare. “Keep dreaming, Lee.”
When the kids weren’t looking, he nudged you lightly with his elbow. You elbowed him back, harder, earning a stifled laugh.
[...]
You sat slumped at your desk, your face buried in your hands as Fred paced back and forth in front of you, rattling off potential solutions. The stress of the upcoming fundraiser gala was weighing on you like a damn cast-iron skillet. 
The shelves in the stockroom were stacked with ingredients that you weren’t even sure you’d be able to use now that the catering service had ghosted you. It was a disaster waiting to happen.
Fred sighed dramatically, flopping down in the chair across from you. “Alright, boss, what’s the game plan? Do we, like, call another service or… just throw in the towel and serve chips and soda?”
You groaned, peeking at him through your fingers. “Fred, I swear to God, if you bring up chips one more time—”
“Okay, okay, chill,” he said, throwing his hands up in defense. “But for real, though. We gotta figure this out. You know how fancy these people are. One whiff of ‘homemade’ and they’re gonna start asking if we milked the cows ourselves.”
You let out a dry laugh, leaning back in your chair and staring at the ceiling. “I should’ve just canceled the gala altogether. Who even does this every year? I’m not Beyoncé.”
Fred smirked. “True, but you’re like… Beyoncé of the kitchen. That counts for something, right?”
“Fred,” you deadpanned, narrowing your eyes at him. “That is not helpful.”
You were mid-spiral, staring at your disheveled desk, when a knock pulled you out of your chaos. Turning sharply, you found Jihoon leaning against the doorframe, hands shoved into his pockets like he was trying to look casual—but you could tell he was hesitant, maybe even nervous.
What the hell did he want now? You thought he already headed home.
“Am I interrupting?” he asked, his eyes darting between you and Fred, who was sprawled across the chair forehead red from how stressed he got.
Fred’s head shot up like a meerkat. “Not at all! Actually, perfect timing—”
You shot Fred a glare sharp enough to make him frown. “Fred. Shut. Up.” Then you turned to Jihoon, crossing your arms. “What do you want?”
Jihoon raised an eyebrow. “Heard about the cancellation. Thought you might need a hand.”
Fred couldn’t help himself. He snorted. “She needs more than a hand. She needs, like, divine intervention at this point.”
“Fred!” you hissed, your face heating up. Fred waved you off, muttering something about grabbing coffee, and practically bolted out of the room, leaving you alone with Jihoon.
You sighed and turned your full attention to him. “Alright, so what’s this about? Because unless you have a whole-ass catering team hiding in your back pocket, I don’t think you can magically fix this.”
Jihoon tilted his head, his lips twitching into that insufferable smirk you hated so much. “Well, I don’t have one in my pocket, but I do have a team. Or did you forget I used to run a restaurant?”
You blinked at him. Once. Twice. “Wait. You’re serious?”
“Dead serious,” he said, straightening up a bit. “I can bring my team in. We’ll handle the food. You focus on… whatever else needs doing. Win-win.”
You stared at him, trying to gauge if he was actually being helpful or just showing off. “And what’s the catch?”
“No catch,” he said smoothly. “I just want the kids to have a good night. And… maybe—prove to you that I’m not as useless as you think.”
You let out a groan, rubbing your temples. “God, you’re so smug.”
“Smug, but capable,” he quipped.
It wasn’t like you had a long list of alternatives, and time was running out. You were about to say no—hell, you even opened your mouth to shut him down—but the words didn’t come. You were stuck, and deep down, you knew it.
“Fine,” you muttered, crossing your arms even tighter. “But if your team screws this up, Jihoon, I’m holding you personally responsible.”
His smirk widened into a full grin. “Deal.”
He turned to leave, and you couldn’t resist one last jab. “And don’t think this means I trust you or anything!”
Jihoon glanced back, his smirk back to its usual lazy self. “Wouldn’t dream of it, Chef.”
Fred found you in the kitchen later, supervising a delivery of more ingredients that just reminded you how overwhelming this whole gala was going to be. “So, you really letting Jihoon handle the food?”
“Not like I have a choice,” you muttered, signing off on a receipt. “It’s either him or I start calling catering companies and praying someone says yes for this weekend.”
Fred snickered, nudging you with his elbow. “You’re playing with fire, boss. You know that, right?”
“I know...” you sighed. 
You bit your lip, your eyes fixed on Jihoon across the room as your thoughts tangled themselves into knots. He was chatting with his assistant, leaning slightly against the counter in that laid-back way of his. But then, a small hand tugged at his pant leg—a boy from the younger group, arms stretched high in the universal signal to pick me up, as he closed and opened his hands.
Jihoon hesitated for half a second, glancing down, but the moment the kid grinned up at him, Jihoon’s expression softened into something you weren’t sure you’d ever seen before. He crouched to the boy’s level, picking him up with ease, and the little guy immediately started chattering about… something. Jihoon nodded along like it was the most important thing he’d ever heard, even giving a small laugh that made your stomach twist.
“Y/N.” Fred’s voice brought you back, and you turned to see him giving you that I’m onto you look.
“What?” you whispered sharply, leaning closer.
Fred smirked. “I said, you’re really letting Jihoon handle this? Big leap of faith.”
You sighed, dropping your voice even lower so no one else could hear. “Do you think he’s gonna mess everything up again?”
Fred tilted his head, watching Jihoon over your shoulder. “Mess up? Nah. He’s too proud for that. He’d rather break his back making this perfect than give you more ammo to throw at him.”
You raised an eyebrow, still skeptical. “You’re awfully optimistic.”
Fred leaned closer, his voice lowering to match yours. “Look, I know he’s got a reputation—believe me, I’ve heard all about it—but people change. I’ve been watching him. He’s trying, Y/N. He really is.”
You glanced back at Jihoon, just in time to see him toss the boy lightly into the air and catch him, earning a giggle loud enough to echo through the room. Jihoon smiled, genuinely, and you caught yourself blinking like you couldn’t believe what you were seeing.
Fred nudged you. “See what I mean? That’s not the same guy who showed up on day one, looking like he wanted to be anywhere else but here.”
“Doesn’t mean he won’t screw this up,” you muttered, your fingers tightening around the clipboard you were holding.
Fred gave you a look that bordered on exasperation. “You’re allowed to doubt, boss, but at least give him credit for showing up. He’s not just phoning it in. Look at him.”
You did. Jihoon had set the boy down and was now crouching as a small group of kids swarmed him, waving drawings in his face. He listened intently, nodding as one of the girls pointed out the details of her masterpiece. Even from a distance, you could see the way his lips twitched into a small smile.
“See?” Fred whispered, his tone softer now. “He’s trying to be here, to be part of this. Maybe he’s not perfect, but none of us are. Don’t punish the guy for trying.”
You bit your lip again, uncertainty clawing at you. “It’s not just about trying, Fred. It’s about doing it.”
“And he’s doing,” Fred countered gently. “Every single day, in his own way.”
You stayed quiet, watching Jihoon stand up and ruffle one of the boy’s hair before turning back to his assistant. As if sensing your gaze, he glanced up, meeting your eyes for a fleeting moment. 
Fred patted your shoulder, snapping you out of it. “Look, I’m not saying you have to trust him blindly. But maybe, you can let him prove himself.”
You exhaled sharply, the weight of everything pressing against your chest. “Fine. But if he screws this up, I’m not holding back.”
Fred grinned.
Jihoon, still watching from across the room, gave you a slight nod before turning back to his conversation. The boy at his feet clung to his leg like a koala, and Jihoon, didn’t seem to mind.
— // One day before the Fundraiser Gala // —
The sound of heels and boots against the tile floor echoed through the kitchen, direct contradiction to the usual patter of children’s sneakers and laughter. Jihoon’s team had arrived, and damn, they looked like they meant business. Clad in immaculate white chef coats and black pants, they marched in like some kind of culinary SWAT team, their faces serious as their eyes scanned the colorful cabinets, the shelves stacked with bright utensils, and the whimsical decorations scattered around.
For a second, you thought they might’ve walked into the wrong place. This wasn’t their sleek with its stainless steel everything and clinical vibes.
One of the chefs—a woman probably in her late thirties, with warm brown eyes and a bright smile—broke away from the group. Her crisp chef’s hat stood out even more because of the colorful butterfly pinned to the front. She approached you with her hands clasped in front of her, her energy immediately softening the sharpness of the arrival.
“You must be Chef Y/N,” she saidt. “It’s such an honor to meet you. I’m a big fan of your work. My daughter used to come here a few years ago before we moved away.”
You blinked, caught off guard by her warmth. Then your lips curved into a genuine smile as you reached out to clasp her outstretched hand. “Oh, really? That’s amazing! What’s her name?”
“Ellie,” she said, her smile widening. “She loved it here—always talked about the classes and how kind you were. You really made an impact on her.”
Your chest tightened with pride as you squeezed her hands lightly. “That means so much to me. Thank you for sharing that.”
Jihoon’s voice broke through the moment, sharp but not unkind, as he began directing his team like a seasoned general. “You, start unpacking the equipment and setting up the stations. Over there,” he pointed toward the far counters, “clear the area for plating tomorrow. We’ll use this section for prep. Let’s move efficiently; we don’t have all day.”
The chefs snapped into action, moving in sync as they carried crates of supplies and ingredients to the designated areas. Some paused briefly to take in the kitchen's playful décor—bright red mixing bowls, pink spatulas, even a small chalkboard where the kids had drawn messy pictures of cookies and cakes.
A younger chef paused at the chalkboard and tilted his head, squinting at a crookedly drawn cake. “What’s this supposed to be?”
You smirked, stepping closer. “That’s a birthday cake. Pretty sure it was done by a five-year-old last week.”
He grinned sheepishly and quickly got back to work.
As the flurry of activity settled into a rhythm, Jihoon finally approached you, wiping his hands on a towel slung over his shoulder. His sleeves were rolled up, his forearms dusted with flour—intimidating or approachable? you couldn't name it. 
“So,” he said, nodding toward his team bustling behind him, “what do you think?”
You folded your arms, raising an eyebrow. “You brought an army.”
Jihoon smirked, his dimple flashing. “You said you were stressed about the gala. I figured I’d bring reinforcements.”
“I didn’t think reinforcements would look like... this.” You gestured toward the scene unfolding behind him—chefs moving almost mechanically, unpacking boxes of spices, knives, and tools that looked way too fancy for your humble kitchen. “They’re terrifyingly efficient.”
Jihoon’s smirk widened. “It’s what we do.”
You shook your head, pleasedly. “I’m not used to this many people in here. Usually, it’s just me, Fred, and the kids. Maybe a volunteer or two. This is... Geez.”
Jihoon’s expression softened just slightly. “It’ll be fine. They’re good at what they do, and they’re here to help.” He tilted his head toward the woman with the butterfly pin, who was busy organizing a shelf of ingredients. “And they’re not all bad, see? You’ve already made a fan.”
You let out a small laugh, glancing over at her. “She seems sweet. But you—” you pointed at him, mock serious, “—better not let this whole operation steamroll what we’ve got here. I don’t want this place feeling like some high-end restaurant. It’s not what we’re about.”
Jihoon held up his hands, a teasing glint in his eyes. “Noted, Chef. No steamrolling.”
“Good,” you said, though it was a simple conversation, it left your stomach flipping a little.
Fred appeared at your side, raising an eyebrow at the scene. “Well, this is new. You two... not bickering?”
Jihoon let out a low laugh. “Don’t get used to it.”
Fred snorted. “Noted.”
As the three of you stood there, Jihoon’s team settled further into their work. And for the first time in days, you let yourself feel a tiny spark of hope. Maybe  this fundraiser wouldn’t be a complete disaster.
The faint pop of balloons filled the air as you stood outside the big house, pointing toward the arch being assembled. The guy on the ladder adjusted the last few balloons based on your direction. “Yeah, a little to the left. No, too much—back a bit. Perfect!” you called, stepping back to admire the colorful display. Satisfied, you headed inside to check on the lobby.
The scene was coming together beautifully. Soft string lights cascaded down the walls, tables draped in crisp white cloths were adorned with modest floral arrangements, and a few colorful drawings from the kids had been framed and placed strategically to keep the spirit of the NGO alive. You smiled, exhaustion creeping in.
The kitchen door swung open briefly, the sound of movement spilling out. Jihoon’s voice rang clear as he called out commands. Curious, you moved closer, the faint smell of roasted vegetables and fresh herbs making your stomach grumble.
“Should we add the asparagus to the risotto?” one of the chefs asked Jihoon.
You peeked in to see Jihoon standing near the counter, frowning at the question. His arms were crossed as he considered the dish. “No. Substitute it with something the kids will like better. Maybe peas or sweet corn—something familiar.” His tone was sharp but thoughtful, and you couldn’t help the small smile tugging at your lips. He’s got this.
With the decoration finished, you looked around the lobby one last time, hands on your hips, your legs were starting to feel the long day. Just as you were about to head upstairs for a quick break, Jihoon’s voice called out.
“Chef Y/N! Come to the kitchen for a second!”
You groaned dramatically, rolling your eyes but heading toward the kitchen anyway. The team had gathered around the main counter, dishes from the menu arranged neatly in front of them. Jihoon stood in the center, sleeves rolled up, looking completely in his element. When you stepped in, he placed a firm hand on your lower back, gently guiding you to the counter.
“Alright, Chef,” he said with a small smirk. “You’re the boss—taste and let us know if anything needs adjusting.”
You set your clipboard down by the edge of the counter, glancing at the team. Their expressions ranged from curious to tense, some with hands clasped nervously in front of them, others holding their breath. The way they watched you reminded you of the kids during class, eagerly awaiting your feedback with shiny, hopeful eyes. It was a window straight to their inner child, and it warmed you in a way you hadn’t expected.
You picked up the first dish—a delicate risotto plated beautifully with fresh herbs—and took a bite. The creamy texture melted on your tongue, and you couldn’t help but nod in approval. The team collectively exhaled, and a few shared quiet smiles.
Moving to the next dish, a roasted chicken breast with a honey glaze, you chewed thoughtfully before nodding again. Your eyebrows raised as you flipped to a fresh page on your clipboard and started writing.
From the corner of your eye, you noticed a few of them shifting nervously, trying to sneak a peek at what you were jotting down. You heard someone’s breath hitch, and you fought back a grin. Their curiosity bubbling over like kids at a science fair.
Finally, you set the pen down and looked up at the group with a big smile. “Everything is excellent,” you said warmly, your tone full of genuine praise. The room erupted into quiet sighs of relief and soft laughter as they exchanged congratulatory nods.
Jihoon stood at your side, his eyes on you, but you didn’t miss the curiosity there, too. You ripped the page from your clipboard and handed it to him. “Here,” you said. “See you all tomorrow—get some rest. You’ve earned it!”
As you left the kitchen, you could feel their eyes lingering on you, their whispers audible even as you stepped into the hallway.
“What did she write?” someone asked, unable to contain their curiosity.
Jihoon unfolded the note, and for a moment, his face was unclear. Then he scoffed softly, a smile breaking across his face as he shook his head.
“What is it, Chef?”
Jihoon chuckled and held up the paper for them to see. Written in bold letters, surrounded by a big smiley face, were the words:
"You have the best team ever, Jihoon-ah! (P.S. Don’t mess it up, or I’ll switch the risotto for instant noodles tomorrow.)"
The room blast into laughter, the tension evaporating in an instant. Jihoon rubbed the back of his neck, grinning sheepishly.
— // The day of the Fundraiser Gala // —
The afternoon stretched lazily into evening. You were on autopilot, clipboard in hand, mentally running through the checklist one last time.
You didn’t even notice Jihoon’s team gathered in a loose circle near the kitchen, stifling laughter as they watched you stride past, completely oblivious. Jihoon, standing at the center, tried to hold it together, his lips twitching and his cheeks dangerously close to full-on pink.
When you finally looked up, feeling the weight of their stares, you froze. Jihoon caught your gaze, his face crumpling into silent laughter as he pointed at your head.
You blinked, confused, before your hand flew up and landed on the pink rollers still perched on your head. Your cheeks flamed instantly. “Oh my God,” you groaned, rolling your eyes dramatically. “Not a word!” you warned, glaring at Jihoon, who was practically doubled over, biting his fist to keep from cackling.
“Come on,” he teased, still grinning. “It’s a look!”
You huffed, trying to keep your composure as you giggled despite yourself. Jihoon straightened, still laughing. “Alright, alright, no judgment. But seriously…” His tone softened slightly, and his eyes swept over you. “You’ve been running around all day. Go get ready—we’ll take care of the rest from here.”
You smiled tiredly, feeling the faint brush of his fingers against your shoulder as he winked. The touch lingered, even as you turned to head upstairs.
In your office, the mirror reflected someone entirely different from your usual self. The rollers were gone, replaced by soft waves cascading around your face. The long dress hugged your waist and flared subtly at your hips. It was nothing like the practical aprons or flour-dusted chef hats you wore every day. For the first time in a while, you felt glamorous.
A knock sounded at your door, and Fred poked his head in. “You look…” He sniffed loudly, dramatically. “...so good. Do you even know how to walk in heels?”
You rolled your eyes and pushed at his shoulder playfully. “Shut up, Fred.” The hard texture of his tuxedo jacket pressed against your palm, a memo that tonight wasn’t just another day in the kitchen.
The lobby was alive when you descended the stairs. Guests filled the space—reporters, actors, chefs with Michelin stars under their belts, the kids’ parents, and longtime supporters of the organization. Some children were already laughing and playing with the monitors, their joy cutting through the formal atmosphere in the most perfect way.
You greeted guests warmly, flashing your practiced smile as cameras clicked and people extended hands to shake yours. But out of the corner of your eye, you caught sight of Jihoon.
He stood near one of the round tables, his pristine white chef’s coat gleaming under the lights. Unlike the standard uniforms, his was sharp and sophisticated, accented with a brooch showcasing his achievements. His short hair was perfectly styled, and the smell of his soap lingered faintly in the air—jihoon always smelled like a fresh bath.
Jihoon was mid-conversation with a Michelin-starred chef, but his attention kept drifting. You could feel his eyes on you as you moved through the crowd. When your gaze met his, he subtly adjusted the collar of his coat, looking flustered.
He raised his hand, beckoning you over.
“Y/N,” he called, a bit more breathless than usual.
You walked over, smiling as he introduced you. “This is Chef Park. I had classes with him when I was just starting out.”
Chef Park extended a hand warmly, and you shook it, your voice full of charm as you exchanged pleasantries. Jihoon tried to stay focused on the conversation, but his gaze kept sliding back to you.
The dress—damn, the dress. The way it emphasized the curve of your waist, the dip of your back, the subtle swell of your chest—Jihoon felt his mouth go dry.
While you chatted animatedly with Chef Park, Jihoon fought to keep himself together. His eyes darted downward for a split second, landing on your ass before quickly snapping back up.
Fred sidled up next to Jihoon, smirking. “She cleans up nice, huh?”
Jihoon shot him a sharp look, cheeks pink. “Shut up.”
Fred grinned wider, nudging him with an elbow. “Bet you’re regretting all those jokes about her rollers now.”
Jihoon groaned quietly, running a hand through his hair as he muttered, “You have no idea.”
When the conversation with Chef Park ended, you turned back to Jihoon, your smile soft. “So? Everything on track?”
Jihoon swallowed hard, nodding. “Yeah. All good. Just… don’t trip in those heels, okay?” he teased lightly, though his voice was a little hoarse.
You smirked, leaning in slightly. “Don’t burn the risotto, Jihoon-ah.”
Fred’s laugh from behind was loud enough to draw attention, but you were already slipping away, leaving Jihoon standing there, flustered and very much not focused on risotto anymore.
Everywhere you turned, there were people—donors, parents, fancy celebs holding glasses of wine like it was part of their outfits. The kind of people who looked too perfect. 
Back in the kitchen, you caught glimpses of Jihoon barking orders—well, not barking, but you know, his stern-but-not-rude tone that somehow made you think, damn, is it hot in here, or is it just him? His uniform was doing wonders, too. That brooch on his chest? Fancy as hell. The sharp cut of his chef coat? Not fair. The dude was practically glowing, commanding his team with this quiet authority that made you wanna—well, your ego didn’t wanted to finish that thought.
But it wasn’t just his looks. Watching him orchestrate everything like a culinary conductor, was making your knees go weak—It just hit different. He made plating look like an Olympic sport—it was sexy in a he’s-too-distracted-to-realize-how-hot-he-is kinda way.
You tried not to linger in the kitchen doorway like some creep, but your feet betrayed you. You found yourself lingering by the double doors leading into the kitchen way more than necessary, just to sneak a peek. And when Jihoon glanced up mid-sentence—probably to tell someone to stop over-salting the soup, the devil on your shoulder moaned in the most slutty and mockingly way in your ear.
He had this stupid air about him tonight, like a general in a Michelin-starred army, his pristine chef’s jacket glowing under the lights.
Honestly, it was hot. Too hot.
Every detail mattered to him tonight, like he was pouring himself into every dish for the house—and for you.
Meanwhile, Jihoon… He felt you. He swore he could feel you every damn time you entered the kitchen. He didn’t even have to turn around to know you were standing there, clipboard probably in hand, lips pressed together as you analyzed everything.
At one point, as he was giving instructions about caramelizing the chiken, his assistant caught him mid-stutter. Jihoon blinked, realizing he’d glanced at the door when he didn’t even mean to. Sure enough, there you were, leaning slightly against the doorframe, watching him.
“Chef?” his assistant asked, clearly amused.
Jihoon shook his head, trying to focus. But god, how could he when you were out there looking like that? The memory of your dress earlier—was burned into his mind, everytime he finished a plate.
And you weren’t just standing around, either. You were networking like crazy, charming the big donors with your natural warmth. Jihoon kept overhearing snippets of your conversations, catching the soft laughs you’d coax out of the crowd. His chest tightened every time. How the hell were you this good at everything?
The main event started in the salon, where guests gathered around tables adorned with delicate flower arrangements. A massive screen hung at the front of the room, flashing photos of the NGO’s achievements, kids smiling and laughing, and heartfelt thank-you messages from families.
You had a glass of wine in your hand, but you weren’t drinking much—your attention was split between schmoozing the guests and keeping tabs on Jihoon. He entered the room with his team in tow, their white jackets contrasting beautifully with the dark, sleek space. His presence shifted the entire mood, drawing eyes like a magnet.
As the night went on, donations started rolling in. The screen showed the numbers climbing higher and higher, names of donors flashing beside each amount. You clapped along with everyone else, heart swelling every time the digits jumped. But then a new name appeared: Lee Jihoon. His real name by the side of the donation, not his professional one.
Your breath caught. The amount wasn’t just generous; it was enormous. Enough to make an audible gasp ripple through the crowd.
Fred’s hands landed on your shoulders, giving them a firm squeeze. You didn’t respond, eyes fixed on Jihoon as he stood near the back of the room, his hands shoved into his pockets. He wasn’t looking at the screen. Instead, his gaze was on you.
Later, after the gala dinner had been served and the kids had performed their adorable little skit, Jihoon’s team gathered in the salon, celebrating their successful service. Jihoon found you again, his hand brushing yours as he handed you a flute of champagne, making you abandon your clipboard once for the night, before heading to the kitchen. Cute.
Minutes later Jihoon saw you coming towards his team direction, and he stepped aside, making room for you in the circle. His hand brushed against your back lightly, making your skin shiver under the pads of his fingers.
“Everything okay?” he asked.
“Perfect,” you replied, glancing at him. “You really outdid yourself tonight.”
He gave a small smile, but it didn’t quite hide the way his chest puffed up a little at your praise.
One of the chefs leaned forward, clearly curious. “So… what’d you think of the risotto?”
You laughed softly, remembering the dish you’d tasted earlier. “Honestly? It was flawless. You guys knocked it out of the park.”
The team broke into wide smiles, their pride radiating through the room. Jihoon stood quietly beside you, but you could feel the satisfaction rolling off him.
“You really do have the best team, Jihoon-ah,” you said quietly, just for him to hear.
He chuckled, his eyes crinkling at the corners. “I know. But don’t tell them that—they’ll get cocky.”
You rolled your eyes, but your smile stayed.
[...]
The house was a ghost town now, silent except for the soft hum of the refrigerator in the kitchen. The laughter of the kids and clinking of glasses had faded into memories, and the night felt heavy in the best way—like it had been full.
You stretched your legs out on the rest room couch, head lolling back. The long dress you’d cursed earlier now felt like salvation, hiding how much you wanted to just kick your heels off and sprawl indecently. Fred and Jihoon’s assistant sat across from you, chatting nonstop like they hadn’t just survived the most exhausting night of their lives.
Jihoon, was quiet, his head tilted back against the wall, arms crossed, looking done. You wanted to tell him to take a break, but you knew better—he’d earned the silence.
Still, your throat felt dry, and you sat up suddenly, pushing yourself off the couch. “I need another drink. Back in a sec.”
Fred shot you a look. “Champagne? Or vodka this time?”
“Champagne.” you fflip him off with a tired grin as you headed for the kitchen.
The kitchen was spotless, not a single dish out of place. You stared at the counters, blinking in disbelief.
“No way,” you murmured under your breath, tugging a fresh bottle of champagne from the cooler. “Even the dishes?”
A low voice startled you. “Even the dishes.”
You jumped, nearly dropping the bottle, and spun around. Jihoon was leaning against the doorway, his jacket draped over one arm, his hair slightly mussed like he’d run his fingers through it too many times. He smirked softly at your reaction.
“Sorry,” he said, stepping into the kitchen. “Didn’t mean to scare you.”
“You didn’t,” you lied, grabbing a second glass for him. You poured the champagne and handed him one.
“Cheers,” you said, raising your glass.
He clinked his against yours with a quiet chuckle, the sound of the glasses meeting delicate in the silence.
You sat on the counter, letting out a soft sigh as you sipped. Jihoon moved to lean against the counter beside you, his thigh brushing your knee as he turned his glass in his hand.
“You proved me wrong tonight,” you said suddenly, catching his eye.
He tilted his head, curious. “Oh yeah? About what?”
You smiled, a little softer this time. “About whether you really cared about this place. About the kids. About any of it. I thought you were just here because…” You trailed off, shaking your head. “I don’t know. Because you had to be.”
Jihoon’s brows furrowed, no defensiveness in his voice when he said, “I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t care, Y/N. You know that.”
“I do now,” you admitted, setting your glass beside you. “I see it in how you are with the kids. How you talk to them, listen to them. Even tonight, bowing to every single parent...”
Jihoon’s face softened. “They’re… incredible. Every single one of them. I’m not gonna lie—I thought I wasn’t great with kids. But these kids? I love them, Y/N. Like… it’s different. They’re different. They remind me why I even started doing all this in the first place.”
You leaned back slightly, studying him, your chest tightening at how genuine he looked.
“You’re a sap,” you said, grinning.
“And you’re not?” he shot back, smirking.
You nudged his leg with your knee. “Don’t deflect. I’m being serious. You’ve come so far since you got here. And honestly? The house wouldn’t be what it is tonight without you.”
Jihoon stared at you for a long moment, his lips twitching like he wanted to argue, but then he just took a final sip of his champagne and placed the glass beside yours.
You didn’t even realize you’d been holding your breath until he shifted, slotting himself between your legs with a smoothness that should’ve been illegal. His hands found the counter on either side of your thighs, and he leaned in close.
“You don’t give yourself enough credit,” he murmured. “This place is you. Every inch of it. I’m just… lucky to be part of it.”
Your breath hitched as you met his eyes, the proximity making it impossible to look anywhere else.
“Jihoon…”
“Hmm?” His gaze flicked to your lips, then back to your eyes.
“You’re… a lot.”
“And you’re not?”
Jihoon stood close enough for you to notice how the soft cotton of his t-shirt clung to him underneath the chef’s coat he’d shrugged off earlier. Without thinking, your hand lifted, fingers brushing against the collar of the shirt.
He didn’t move, didn’t flinch. His gaze stayed locked on you, soft and curious.
You cleared your throat, keeping your voice steady. “So… you staying in town? Or are you disappearing again?”
Jihoon tilted his head, smiling softly. “I’m staying.”
“Good,” you said with a small nod, your fingers lingering for a second longer before dropping back to your lap. “In that case… want to make it official?”
His eyebrows shot up. “Official?”
You grinned, your tired eyes sparkling. “I mean, if you want to be part of our team. Contract and everything. Full-on chef Jihoon at the NGO.”
Jihoon blinked at you, the surprise written all over his face. “Are you serious?”
“Dead serious,” you replied. “At this point, if you leave, the kids are gonna cry for days.”
He scoffed, shaking his head with a laugh. “The kids? I’d probably cry.”
You laughed with him, the sound soft and genuine. “Would you?”
“Definitely,” he said, then glanced at you with a smirk. “Would you cry?”
You raised an eyebrow, leaning back a little as you place your palms behind you. “Please. I’ve already cried plenty because of you.”
Jihoon groaned, throwing his head back in defeat. “Don’t bring that up,” he whined.
You softened, nudging his arm. “I’m kidding.”
He sighed, resting his head on your shoulder like he was trying to hide from your teasing. “I know,” he mumbled. “But it’s real.”
You didn’t know if he meant the apology or the gratitude, but the way his hand lifted from the counter to rest on your leg through the slit of your dress made your back arch a bit. His palm was warm against your skin, his touch featherlight as he squeezed gently.
He straightened just slightly, his face close enough now that you could see the faint flush creeping along his cheekbones. “What if,” he said quietly, “I made you cry with something good instead?”
Your lips parted, the question taking you off guard. Jihoon didn’t pull back, his gaze flickering between your eyes and your mouth like he was waiting for an answer. His eyebrows furrowing as if he was doing a really big effort to not kiss you.
“I—” You swallowed, your voice catching as his thumb began to trace slow circles against your leg.
His other hand brushed the edge of the counter beside you, steadying himself as he leaned just a fraction closer. “Would you let me?” he asked softly.
Your breath hitched as Jihoon’s hand slid higher up your thigh, his palm warm and firm. The tiniest, unintentional sound escaped your lips—breathy and needy—and the way his smirk curved made your panties sticky almst instantly. He leaned in, close enough for a soft, teasing peck. Merely there. Then he pulled back just enough to catch your reaction, his smirk deepening at the horny look in your eyes.
“Ji,” you whispered, grabbing the front of his shirt before he could get smug. Your lips found his, no uncertainty at all this time, your tongue slipping between his parted lips. 
His lips were impossibly soft, moving against yours with a rhythm that left your mind spinning. His tongue met yours, sweeping against it in a way that made you clutch his shirt tighter, pulling him closer. His hands abandoned your thigh, traveling upward, his palms smoothing over your hips, then the curve of your ass, before they settled on your waist.
Jihoon kissed like he worked in the kitchen—passionately, hard. Every movement was like he knew what would make you wetter, his lips pressing into yours harder, hungrier, as though he was savoring you. His thumbs brushed the edges of your ribs, fingers splaying as he drew you closer, swallowing the quiet moans that slipped out against his lips.
He broke away for a moment, sucking gently on your bottom lip before releasing it with a soft pop. His lips lingered, warm and swollen, against your skin as he caught his breath. You felt his breath fan against your jaw before his mouth trailed kisses to the sensitive skin behind your earlobe. The press of his lips there was wetter, slower, his tongue just grazing enough to make your head tilt back.
His lips were plush, his tongue warm as it laved over the skin just below your ear. The sensation was maddening—gentle nips and soothing licks. He kissed lower, his lips brushing the curve of your neck, finding the pulse point that fluttered beneath his tongue. His tongue darted out, hot and slick, tasting the salt of your skin before he pulled it back in to suck lightly.
You felt your pussy expulsing more honey right after an agonizing tug on your lower belly. You rolled your hipstrying to find his heat down there too. “Hey—Jihoon,” you murmured, hardly able to get his name out as his mouth kept working, your mind slurred, weak and the faint.
And then, just as his hand slid higher, brushing along your ribcage toward your chest, reality hit you like a slap in the face.
The kitchen.
You froze for a second, pulling back with a shaky laugh as you pressed a hand to his chest. “We can’t… here,” you whispered, your cheeks flaming. “This is literally where the kids cook.”
“You’re right. God, you’re right. Im sorry.” Jihoon said, voice muffled against your skin as he let out a shy laugh. “I know. I just…” He pulled back slightly, looking at you like he didn’t want to let go. “I’m sorry. You’re just…”
“Just what?” you teased, arching a brow even as you felt the heat rising to your cheeks.
“...So hot,” he admitted, his lips curving into a sheepish smile that only made you hornier. 
You were about to respond—maybe tease him, maybe kiss him again—when the sound of someone clearing their throat made you both snap out of it like a couple of guilty teenagers caught sneaking around.
Standing in the doorway were Fred and Jihoon’s assistant, their jaws practically on the floor. Fred looked like he’d seen a ghost—or maybe his entire worldview shatter—while Jihoon’s assistant was holding a tray of neatly plated desserts, now slightly tilted as they both froze in place.
“Um…” Fred finally managed. “Are we… interrupting… something?”
You and Jihoon pulled apart instantly—well, as much as you could with him still standing between your legs and his hands still firmly on your waist.
“No!” you both blurted in unison, your voices hitting slightly different octaves, which only made the situation even more awkward.
Fred squinted at the two of you, his gaze darting between your flushed face, Jihoon’s equally guilty expression, and the very obvious fact that you were still sitting on the counter with Jihoon standing way too close.
“Uh-huh,” Fred said slowly, folding his arms. “Because it looks like I just walked into a scene straight out of a porno.”
Jihoon’s assistant, meanwhile, was trying—and failing—to hold back laughter, his shoulders shaking as he set the tray down on a nearby table, grinning like he’d just uncovered the gossip of the century. “Should we give you two a minute? Or, like… ten?”
“Okay, stop,” you groaned, hiding your face in your hands as you tried to will the floor to swallow you whole. “It’s not what it looks like.”
Fred raised an eyebrow. “Really? Because it looks like you were—”
“Fred!” you snapped, cutting him off before he could finish that sentence.
Jihoon, to his credit, was doing his best to look professional again, straightening his shirt and stepping back slightly, though his ears were burning red and his black pants were almost exploding with the hard bulge poking the zipper. “I mean… we were just… talking,” he said, his voice awkwardly high-pitched. “Right, Y/N?”
“Totally.” you said, nodding way too quickly. 
Fred looked like he was physically restraining himself from rolling his eyes. “Oh yeah, because that totally explains why Jihoon’s lips were practically glued to your neck.”
Jihoon’s assistant let out a snort, finally losing it as he doubled over laughing. “This is so much better than I imagined,” he said between giggles. “I knew something was up between you two, but this? Oh, this is gold.”
“Can we not?” Jihoon mumbled, his hands rubbing his face as he leaned against the counter beside you. “Seriously, just… forget this happened, okay?”
Fred crossed his arms, looking suspiciously amused. “Oh, no chance. This is going in the house history books.”
Jihoon groaned. “You’re literally the worst.”
“Yeah, and yet you’re the one making out in the kitchen,” Fred shot back, smirking. “So who’s really winning here?”
You sighed, hopping off the counter and smoothing your dress as you tried to regain some semblance of dignity. “Okay, you’ve had your fun. Can we move on now?”
Fred shrugged, still grinning as he followed Jihoon’s assistant out of the room. “Oh, sure. But just so you know, I’m never letting you live this down.”
As they disappeared around the corner, Jihoon let out a long sigh, his shoulders slumping. His face softened as he caught your eye, and he let out a quiet laugh.
You shrugged, biting back a smile. “Could be worse.”
“Yeah?” Jihoon asked, stepping closer again, his voice reducing slightly. “Like what?”
You didn’t answer, but the look you gave him said everything.
[...]
The NGO was officially closed for a week after the fundraiser gala—a well-deserved break for everyone involved. You had practically collapsed in exhaustion the night after the event, but now, as the week began, your nerves were alive again for a completely different reason: Jihoon was coming over.
Your house, modest and cozy, suddenly felt inadequate in your eyes. It wasn’t that it wasn’t clean or comfortable—it was—but compared to whatever sleek, high-tech penthouse you imagined Jihoon lived in, with modern furniture, and probably some state-of-the-art espresso machine that greeted him in the morning with a personalized message, you felt like your space might seem a little too... quaint.
Still, you’d spent the morning scrubbing your house from top to bottom. The counters were wiped down three times, the couch cushions fluffed and rearranged, and the tiny plant by the window watered, even though it definitely didn’t need it. 
You glanced at yourself in the mirror for what had to be the fiftieth time, smoothing down the soft pink fabric of your loose dress. It wasn’t too dressy, but it was cute and casual enough to not feel overdone. The fabric swayed lightly as you moved, and you liked how it made you look pretty. Enough to say, “I’m not trying too hard, but also please notice I’m cute.”
Why are you acting like this is a date? you scolded yourself. It’s just Jihoon. He’s coming here for work.
To top it off, you’d spent way too long picking out a perfume that smelled sweet but subtle enough to not overpower him. You’d made sure you didn’t smell like cake batter or frosting—not that it would’ve been bad.
When the knock finally came, you nearly tripped over your own feet rushing to the door. Taking a deep breath, you smoothed your dress one last time and opened it, trying not to look like you’d been anxiously waiting there for twenty minutes.
Jihoon stood on your porch, casual but polished in a black crewneck and jeans, his hair perfectly messy in that way that looked completely effortless. He smiled softly, holding up a notebook and a small bag of groceries. “I come bearing snacks and bad handwriting,” he said.
You laughed, stepping aside to let him in. “Well, the snacks can stay. We’ll see about the handwriting.”
Jihoon looked around, his eyes scanning the cozy space. “This is nice,” he said, nodding appreciatively. “Way more personality than my place.”
You blinked, caught off guard. “Really? I thought you’d be used to… like… manoir vibes.”
“Manoirs don’t feel like this,” he said, glancing at the soft lighting and the framed photos on your shelves. “This feels like someone actually lives here.”
He smirked, stepping into the living room and setting his bag down. “So, what’s the big plan for this super important work meeting?”
Ah, yes. The “work.” You’d convinced yourself that this was about finalizing the “Culinary Educational Outreach Program” you’d both been brainstorming for the organization. Jihoon called it “CEOP,” pronounced like “sip,” which made Fred gag every time he said it.
“First,” you said, trying to ignore how nice Jihoon looked standing in your living room, “we sit down and outline the goals for CEOP. Then, we cook.”
“Cook?” Jihoon raised an eyebrow, his smirk widening. “Are you just using this as an excuse to put me to work in your kitchen?”
You rolled your eyes, motioning for him to follow you to the dining table. “Shut up and sit down. We’ve got notes to take.”
The two of you sat across from each other, your knees brushing occasionally under the table. Jihoon’s handwriting was frustratingly neat for someone who claimed he didn’t care about stationary aesthetics, and for someone who claimed to have atrocious handwriting.
“So,” you started, tapping your pen against the page, “we want to make the cooking classes accessible, fun, and educational, right?”
“Yeah,” Jihoon said, jotting something down. “But we also need to keep the budget in mind. Like, how much can we actually afford to spend on those tiny aprons the kids keep asking for?”
You snorted. “You’re still salty about the aprons?”
“They’re expensive!” he argued, eyes narrowing at you. “And they’re just gonna get covered in flour and icing.”
“That’s the point, Jihoon. Let them be messy. It’s part of the fun.”
Jihoon shook his head, but you caught the way the corner of his mouth twitched up. “Fine. Tiny aprons. But if the kids start demanding personalized chef hats, that’s on you.”
You laughed, leaning forward slightly as you scribbled down some ideas. Jihoon’s gaze flickered to your neckline watching how your boobs moved as you breathe for a split second before he snapped back to his notebook, clearing his throat.
The plan transitioned seamlessly into the kitchen—almost seamlessly. You’d barely gotten past measuring the ingredients when Jihoon leaned over to adjust your grip on a whisk, his hand brushing yours.
“You’re holding it like you’re trying to stab the dough,” he teased.
“Maybe I am,” you shot back, sticking your tongue out at him.
Jihoon just laughed, stepping back to watch as you mixed the batter. His eyes wandered—innocently at first, but when you shifted your weight and the neckline of your dress dipped slightly, he had to bite the inside of his bottom lip to… focus.
“Okay, my turn,” he said, taking the whisk from you.
As he worked, you found yourself leaning in closer, watching the way his muscles shifted under his shirt, the way his jaw clenched slightly in concentration. You didn’t even realize how close you were until Jihoon dipped his finger into the icing sugar and smudged a line across your cheek, careful to not mess your pretty make up or accidentally spot your dress.
“Hey!” you gasped, stepping back, your eyes wide.
Jihoon grinned, holding up his hands. “What? It’s a kitchen. You’re supposed to get messy, remember?”
You frowned, sulking slightly as you wiped at your cheek. “I thought you were gonna kiss me, not… attack me with sugar.”
Jihoon leaned back just enough to meet your flustered gaze, his smirk downright unsafe. He tilted his head, pretending to be shocked, one hand pressed to his chest in mock disbelief.
“Oh,” he said, his voice low and teasing. “So you want me to kiss you?”
You could feel the heat creeping up your neck, your hands fidgeting at your sides. “I didn’t—”
“Mm-mm.” Jihoon shook his head, cutting you off as he stepped closer, crowding your space. “Don’t even try to deny it. You’ve been looking at me like that all dayy. And now this pout?” His eyes flicked to your lips, and the corner of his mouth twitched. “If you do that again, I might just have to—”
You couldn’t look at him. The pressure of his gaze was too much, and you turned your head to the side, lips pressed into a tight line. Jihoon wasn’t having it.
His hand reached up, fingers gently guiding your chin until you were looking at him again. “There it is,” he murmured, his voice a little rougher, like he was restraining himself from jumping on you. “That pout.” His smile widened, and he took a small step between your legs, his hands finding your hips and squeezing lightly. “C’mere.”
His lips brushed yours—insufficiently, like a mock. It wasn’t enough to satisfy the yearn already forming between your legs, but it was enough to make you almost moan. And Jihoon noticed.
He grinned against your mouth, taking his time as his hand slid up to cradle the back of your neck, bumping your tits in the process. “You’re gonna have to ask me properly, like the good girl you are,” he whispered, the tip of his nose grazing yours.
“Please?” you breathed, but it was all he longed for.
His lips captured yours fully this time, devastatingly thorough. He didn’t rush, every moment spent tasting your lips was something he savored. His tongue flicked out, tracing the seam of your lips, coaxing them open, and when you let him in, he took.
His tongue hungrily claimed yours, his tongue sliding against yours in deep, lazy strokes that made your knees weak. His other hand slipped around to your lower back, pulling you impossibly closer, so close you could feel the heat of him through his shirt.
He tilted his head, angling the kiss to deepen it further. His teeth grazed your bottom lip, tugging lightly before his tongue followed, soothing the slight sting. The contrast made you whimper, your hands clutching at his shirt like it was the only thing keeping you upright even though the kitchen counter was supporting your back.
“God, you sound so pretty,” Jihoon murmured against your lips. He pressed his hips into yours just enough for you to feel his cock growing inside his pants, making you frown desperately, your fingers tightening in the fabric of his shirt.
His hand drifted lower, squeezing your waist before trailing over the curve of your ass. When he pulled back, just slightly, his lips were plum, slick and swollen. He leaned in again, pressing a kiss to the corner of your mouth, then to your jaw, then to the sensitive spot that he tasted and teased days before.
Your head fell back as his lips traveled lower, his tongue flicking out to taste the skin of your neck. He sucked lightly, and you knew that it was enough to leave a redspot without even look at it.
Your hand slid between your bodies, and the second your palm made contact with the unyielding weight of his cock, Jihoon’s reaction was instant. His hips stuttered forward, a whiny, almost helpless sound escaping his lips as his forehead dropped against your shoulder. “Oh, fuck—you can’t just—” He cut himself off with a breathy laugh that turned into a moan, his hands gripping your hips to steady himself.
You couldn’t help but grin while rolling your eyes lightly, fingers curling around him to get a better feel. He felt big, so thick that your fingers barely wrapped halfway around the length of him. You gave an experimental squeeze, and his mouth fell open, his breath hitching as he muttered, “Jesus fucking Christ, Y/N.”
“Didn’t think you’d be so sensitive,” you teased, sliding your hand along him slowly, feeling the heat of him through the fabric. His hips jerked involuntarily, grinding into your palm, and you gasped at the weight of his phallus.
He lifted his head, his face flushed, lips shiny and parted. “Sensitive?” He let out a shaky laugh, biting his bottom lip before grinning wickedly. “You’re over here squeezing me, and you wanna talk about me being sensitive?”
You squeezed him again, just to see what he’d do, and he cursed loudly, his eyes squeezing shut. “Fuck—okay, okay, you’re insane.” His hands gripped your hips tighter, holding you still as he started to grind against your palm, his cock twitching under your touch.
“Jihoon,” you whispered, and he opened his eyes, his pupils broad as he looked at you.
“What?” he rasped with voice strained but, his hips never losing their rhythm against your hand.
“You’re literally humping my hand right now,” you pointed out, biting your lip to hold back a laugh.
“And?” His mouth curved into a smirk, though his voice wavered as you tightened your grip on him. “You think I’m just gonna sit here all chill while you touch me like that?” He let out another moan, his head falling back slightly before his gaze locked on you again.
You leaned in, pressing your lips to his ear. “Feels good, huh?” You pressed your palm harder against him, your fingers teasing along his length. His response was immediate—his hips bucked, and a whiny “shit” escaped his lips, his face scrunching up in pleasure.
Jihoon smirked, leaning in until his lips hovered over yours. “Keep playing, and see what happens,” he murmured, his breath warm against your skin.
You raised an eyebrow, your fingers brushing against the tip of him, and he groaned, the pads of your fingers starting to get sticky with the precum already jutting through his pants. 
He exhaled sharply, and suddenly, his body pressed against yours so firmly that you couldn’t move. The breath hitched in your throat as his hips pushed yours into the counter. Jihoon’s eyes flicked down, and that’s when he froze.
Your dress straps had slipped from your shoulder, the fabric falling just enough to expose the curve of your chest. The neckline dipped precariously low, your tits all but spilling out. He couldn’t decide if he wanted to worship or devour you.
“Holy shit,” he muttered, dragging his bottom lip through his teeth before smirking. “Hiding all that under an apron, hm? How dare you?”
You rolled your eyes and gave him a tiny, playful shake, but the motion only made things worse. Jihoon’s pupils dilated as his eyes flicked between the slight bounce and your face.
Without waiting another second, he hooked his fingers under the neckline of your dress and tugged it down, the fabric pooling at your feet in record time. He muttered something incoherent under his breath, hands already fumbling with the clasp of your bra, his desperation so endearing it made you giggle.
“You good?” you teased as he struggled with the hooks.
“Do not laugh at me right now,” he grumbled. Finally, the clasp came undone, and he yanked the straps down your arms like his life counted on it.
“Goddamn,” he whispered, his hands immediately cupping you, warm and firm. His thumbs brushed over your nipples, and you feel like jelly in his hands, your skin not even covering the shivering. “You’re actually perfect. Like, what the hell?”
You were about to retort when he leaned forward and pressed a wet, open-mouthed kiss to the swell of your breast, and whatever witty comment you had died on your tongue.
Jihoon pulled back just enough to look at you. “Counter,” he rasped, already moving to lift you.
But the universe had other plans. His elbow knocked into a mixing bowl on the counter, sending it clattering to the floor with a loud metallic crash. Both of you froze, eyes wide like kids caught sneaking snacks.
“Shit,” Jihoon whispered, glancing down at the bowl before meeting your eyes. A laugh bubbled out of him, breathy and slightly unhinged. “Okay, yeah. This is cursed. New location.”
You couldn’t help but laugh too, as he grabbed your hand, pulling you toward the bathroom like it was some grand escape.
The bathroom light flicked on, and Jihoon speeded, it was the next room. He turned to you, his hands sliding up your sides, fingers brushing over the straps still hanging limply on your forearms. “Let me,” he murmured, his voice softer now but no less heated.
Instead of rushing, he dipped his head, his lips trailing down your shoulder as he pushed the straps down. The fabric fell away entirely, and his hands followed the motion, sliding down your body.
When you reached for his shirt, Jihoon smirked, pulling back just slightly. “Oh, you wanna do the honors?”
You nodded, biting your lip as you tugged the hem of his shirt up. He raised his arms, letting you peel it off him, the fabric catching on his mess of dark hair before dropping to the floor. Your hands roamed over his chest, tracing the lines of his muscles as he watched you.
When it came to his pants, though, he grabbed your wrist. “Wait,” he said, his grin widening. He hooked his thumbs into the waistband of his pants and drawers and pushed them down himself.
Your eyes dropped, and you couldn’t help the way your mouth fell open slightly. “Wow,” you whispered, and he laughed, stepping closer until his body pressed against yours again.
“Yeah?” he murmured, his lips brushing yours. “Wait ‘til I’m inside you.”
You didn’t even try to stifle the shameless moan that ripped from your throat, loud and unrestricted. It sounded like something straight out of a porno, and Jihoon had the nerve to smirk. “Damn, we’re not even there yet… You like it when I talk with you like this?”
You nodded quickly, disoriented in the sense to say anything coherent. Jihoon smirked, leaning in to nip at your jawline before pulling back just enough to hook a finger into the waistband of your panties.
“Come nearer,” he whispered, tugging you forward by the elastic until your chest clashed against his. His nails grazed the skin just above the fabric, teasing the sensitive area before his hand dipped lower. He let the material slide over your hips, his knuckles brushing your skin as he pushed it down. When the panties reached your thighs, he let gravity do the rest, the fabric pooling around your ankles.
Jihoon’s hands immediately found your waist, lifting you like you weighed nothing and setting you on the cool marble of the bathroom sink. The contrast between the chill of the counter and the heat of his body made you shiver, your legs instinctively closing.
“Uh-uh,” Jihoon said, his voice a frolicsome warning. His hands gripped your knees, spreading them apart again, wider this time. His gaze dropped, and his breath audibly caught as the light from the mirror illuminated you perfectly—your thighs trembling, your folds glistening, and the way your body clenched and unclenched in forethought.
“Jesus Christ,” he muttered, his thumb brushing the inside of your thigh as if to test if you were real. “You’re so fuckin’ pretty down here. Like, actually unreal.”
Your face burned at his words, but before you could respond, his hand was back. His index finger dragged lightly through your folds, collecting your slick before circling your clit with a featherlight touch. Your eyes squeezed shut as your turned your head to the side, as if the sight of him would make you weaker.
“Jihoon,” you whined, your voice high-pitched and needy.
He grinned at that, his other hand bracing your hip to keep you from squirming away. “Patience.” he murmured. 
His finger pressed more firmly against your clit now, rubbing infinite motions that made you rest your back on the mirror, instantly melting. Just as you felt the stimulus start to build, he stopped.
Your head snapped up, a frustrated groan leaving your lips. Jihoon only laughed, leaning in to kiss your cheek, the corner of your mouth, before pulling back again.
“What’s the rush?” he teased, his finger sliding lower to brush against your entrance but never pushing in. “We’ve got all night.”
You whimpered, your hips bucking toward his hand. His smirk widened, and he slid his finger back up, tapping lightly against your clit like he was testing how much more you could take.
“Jihoon! N-no!” you practically sobbed, your thighs trembling as you clenched around nothing.
“No…,” he said, his voice low and commanding. “I want you shaking for me.”
He alternated his technique, sometimes circling your clit in lazy patterns, other times tapping. Each time you came close to your orgasm, he pulled back, leaving you swaying on the border.
Your breaths came out in short, shallow pants, and your hands gripped the counter so hard your knuckles started to hurt. “Please,” you begged, your voice breaking.
Jihoon leaned in, his lips brushing yours as he whispered, “Just one more time.”
This time, he used two fingers, sliding them in a v-shape around your clit and moving them side to side in quick, ribbing motions. The sensation was unlike anything you’d felt before, and your hips jerked involuntarily.
“Shes so puffy already,” he murmured, his eyes locked on your cunt as he worked you over. “I can feel you shaking, baby. You gonna cum for me?”
You nodded desperately, tears pricking at the corners of your eyes. “Yes—please, Jihoon, I can’t—”
Jihoon pulled his hand away, and you sobbed. Your chest heaved as frustration and desperation coiled tight inside you, tears welling in your eyes.
“Aww, baby,” Jihoon cooed, his voice a mocking singsong that somehow felt like a soothing balm and fuel to your fire at the same time. His hand cupped your cheek, thumb brushing a stray tear that slid down. “Look at you. So needy. You’re so wet already, and you think you’re ready for this?”
Your breath caught as he grabbed his cock, thick and glistening at the tip with precum, and let it rest heavy on your stomach. He tapped it against your skin, each tap leaving a sticky, wet line that trailed down to your bellybutton.
“See this?” Jihoon asked, his tone low but tinged with teasing. He shifted his hips, dragging the head of his cock up your stomach so you could feel its full length. “How do you think this is gonna fit, huh? You can’t even take my fingers without cumming. What makes you think this cock’s gonna slide right in?”
You blinked down at him, the weight of his cock against your belly making your head spin. It reached your bellybutton, almost too far, the swollen head ruddy and glistening like it was mocking you, daring you to try.
Jihoon’s gaze softened for a second as he caught the wobble in your lip and the glossy sheen of your tear-filled eyes. “God, you’re too cute,” he muttered, before his hand was back between your legs. “Alright, sweetheart,” he said, cooing again as he pressed the pad of his finger to your entrance. “Guess I gotta get you nice and stretched out for me, hmm?”
You felt the slow, steady push of his finger as it slid inside you, every nerve brightening at the intrusion. Your walls clenched around him instinctively, and Jihoon let out a quiet groan.
“There we go,” He slid his finger in deeper, curling it slightly to press against your front wall. Your hips bucked at the sensation, and Jihoon smirked. “Right there, huh? You like that?”
“Y-yes,” you gasped, your hands scrambling for purchase on the cool marble.
His finger pulled back almost completely before sliding in again, this time with a second one alongside it. The stretch was immediate, but your body welcomed it, pulsing around him. Jihoon wasted no time, curling his fingers and dragging them against your walls in a way that made you see stars.
“God, you’re so tight,” he muttered, his free hand resting on your trembling thigh to keep you steady. “You’re squeezing me so good. Can’t wait to feel you clench like this around my cock.”
His fingers picked up a rhythm, alternating between deep, curling strokes and quick, shallow thrusts that kept you guessing. He started adding little motions that made your head spin—scissoring his fingers to stretch you further, pressing his thumb firmly against your clit while his fingers stayed inside, or twisting his wrist slightly to drag his fingertips over new spots.
“You like that?” he asked, after noticing your hand chasing his fingers. “Of course you do. Look at how you’re dripping for me. You’re making such a mess, baby.”
“Jihoon—o-oh my god,” you whimpered, your back arching off the counter as his fingers found a particularly sensitive spot.
“Yeah? Right there?” Jihoon grinned, adjusting his angle to hit it again, harder this time. Your breath hitched, and he chuckled. “That’s it. So good for me.”
You couldn’t help it—the words tumbled out of your mouth in a whispered chant, your voice trembling with every syllable. “Thank you, thank you, thank you…”
Jihoon smiled fondly at you, his cock twitching visibly against his stomach. “You’re so sweet when you beg,” he said, pulling his fingers out momentarily just to slide them back in with a delicious stretch. “You’re gonna make me lose my mind.”
This time, he focused on your clit with his thumb, rubbing quick, tight circles as his fingers curled inside you. He replaced fast stimulation and sudden, devastating stops.
“Ngh���Please,” you whimpered, your thighs trembling as you gripped his forearm.
“You’re so close, hmm?” 
He slowed his movements again, dragging his fingers out just enough to feel the way you clenched around him, desperate to keep him inside. His thumb moved in teasing patterns over your clit, never quite enough pressure to satisfy.
“I need it,” you choked out, your voice breaking as tears streamed down your cheeks.
“I know, baby,” he said, his tone softening again. He pressed a gentle kiss to your temple before his fingers resumed their relentless pace, curling and pressing against that sweet spot again. “But you’re doing so good for me. Just a little more, okay?”
The coil in your stomach tightened impossibly further, and you knew you couldn’t last much longer. Jihoon seemed to sense it too. His fingers curling like they were made to be inside you, massaging your g’spot with a rhythm that felt borderline illegal. His thumb merely rubbed your clit now, just enough to make you twitch, and the devilish smirk on his face said he was doing it on purpose. His other hand gripped your waist, steadying you like he knew you’d collapse if he let go.
“Um—thats why your strawberry mille-feuille is so good,” you suddenly gasped out.
Jihoon blinked, momentarily confused before realization dawned on him. His lips curled into that sly, cocky grin. “Wait—are you thinking about my dessert skills right now? While I’m two knuckles deep inside you?”
You whined, too far gone to deny it. “You’re too good with your hands!”
He chuckled, curling his fingers harder until your knees buckled. “Guess it’s a good thing I’m versatile then, hm?” His tone was light, but his fingers? Ruthless. He angled his wrist slightly, hitting that spot with pinpoint correctness, and you swore your vision went static for a second.
Your body jerked, your clit grinding against the heel of his palm as he shifted his thumb to flick at it—just once, but it sent sparks shooting down your back. His fingers pushed deeper, scissoring slightly, then dragging out achingly slow. “Jihoon, please," you whimpered, your nails digging into his wrist.
“Please what, baby? Want me to keep going? Or stop again?” he teased, his thumb pressing down on your clit just to lift off a second later, leaving you sobbing into his shoulder.
You wanted to slap him and beg him all at once. Instead, you cried out, “Don’t stop—oh my god—Jihoon!”
His smirk faltered for a second when your walls clamped down hard around his fingers, and a rush of wetness coated them. His hips grinding involuntarily into nothing, his cock throbbing visibly. “Greedy little thing.”
You couldnt form words anymore, your head falling back as your whole body spasmed. you chanted his name, completely gone, tears stinging your eyes as the coil in your stomach snapped hard, the force of your orgasm smashing you.
Jihoon didn’t stop. His fingers worked you through every wave, his thumb pressing firm, messy circles on your overstimulated clit until you physically had to push at his chest. “Too much” you croaked, but your legs trembled so bad you knew you couldn’t get far if he decided to keep going.
“Too much?” he repeated. He slowly slid his fingers out, holding them up for both of you to see, glistening and soaked. 
Jihoon still breathed heavily like he was the one being stimulated, giving you time to catch your breath, but you weren’t letting go. Your arms wrapped tight around his neck as you pulled him in, your lips pressing to his. His tongue slid against yours, massaging it in a way that sent heat straight to your sopping pussy. The sound of wet, sticky smacks echoed in the bathroom.
This kiss wasn’t rushed or desperate; it was soft, and so heartbreakingly sweet. Jihoon’s hands roamed over your waist, and as much as he loved the way you tasted—loved the faint hint of the wine you’d shared earlier, the lingering sweetness that seemed to pour from your lips—there was something deeper about it.
Jihoon knew tastes. He knew them better than most people ever could.
He knew the tang of citrus, the buttery richness of a perfectly baked croissant, the smoky depth of roasted meat, and the way sugar could melt on your tongue like magic. He’d spent years chasing after flavors, crafting them into stories on a plate. But none of it, none of it, had ever come close to the taste of you.
It wasn’t just your lips or your skin—it was the whole experience of you. The warmth of your arms wrapped around him, the faint floral scent that clung to your hair, the way your body felt like home against his. If someone ever asked him, in an interview or at some fancy gala, what his favorite taste was, he already knew he’d be in trouble. Because he’d want to say “you.” And how could he not? You weren’t just a flavor; you were comfort food, the kind that nourished your soul in a way no recipe could replicate.
He pressed closer to you, losing himself in the feel of your lips, of your tongue stroking his with an intoxicating rhythm. You were both so caught up in each other that you didn’t even notice when he shifted his hips, the tip of his cock brushing against your entrance. It wasn’t until the head of it nudged inside that you broke the kiss, gasping sharply as your chin fell forward, your moan feeling hot against his mouth.
“Jihoon—” you choked, and it made his stomach twist. He grinned against your lips, nasty and triumphant, his teeth grazing your bottom lip as he tilted his head back slightly to look at your face.
“You didn’t even notice, hm? So focused on kissing me good, you didn’t feel me slip in?”
Your nails dug into his shoulders, your head tilting back as another moan escaped you. Jihoon’s grin only grew wider, so big it almost felt boyish, but there was nothing innocent about the way his hips pressed forward, inch by inch.
Your walls clenched instinctively and then gave way, molding around his girth. You tilted your head down just enough to catch a glimpse, and the sight alone made your stomach tense.
The thin, glossy skin of your folds was stretched taut around him, clinging desperately as if your body didn’t want to let go. The contrast was stark, almost hypnotizing: the way your wetness coated him, leaving a shiny trail that dripped down, pooling at the base where your pussy tried to hug. He followed your gaze to glance down between you, his lips parting in disbelief.
“Goddamn, you’re taking me so well..” He shifted slightly, pressing a little deeper, and yyour vision blurred.
Your head fell back against the mirror as you moaned, your chest heaving. 
He cut you off with a slow roll of his hips, his cock pushing further, stretching you impossibly more. You gasped, your nails dragging down his shoulders as your body tried to adjust. “That’s my girl. Thought you could handle it.”
The slick sounds between you were filthy, echoing in the shadowy bathroom. You couldn’t stop the way your hips shifted, trying to meet him halfway despite the stretch. The movement made him groan, his hands tightening on your hips as he pressed you back against the marble sink.
“Fuck, you’re dripping,” he said, his voice almost a whine as his eyes flicked to where your bodies were joined. “You’re gonna ruin this counter... the floor..”
Your walls fluttered around him, pulling him deeper, and the motion earned a sharp intake of breath from Jihoon. 
His cock pulsed inside you, the wet heat of your walls squeezing him like a vice, clenching around every inch he gave you. His teeth caught his bottom lip as he pulled back just slightly, dragging against your sensitive core before thrusting back in. He wanted to watch you unravel, to hear every desperate sound spilling from your lips.
His hands slid from your hips to your thighs, pushing your legs wider to take him deeper. He paused to glance between you again, mesmerized by the way you swallowed him whole. “Can’t believe this tight little pussy’s taking all of me.”
You whimpered at his words, the sound shamelessly loud in the quiet bathroom, and it sent a quiver down his back. He smiled satisfied, as he leaned in, his lips brushing over your ear. “You like it when I talk to you like that, hm?” he teased, his tongue flicking over your earlobe before he nipped it lightly. “Tell me. Tell me how much you like it.”
“I—fuck—I love it,” you stammered. Your nails scraped down his back, leaving faint red lines in their wake. “Love when you—when you talk to me like that. Love—oh my god—love when you’re inside me.”
“Yeah?” His thrusts slowed again, almost unbearably so, the head of his cock pressing against your g’spot with each measured roll of his hips. He let his forehead drop to yours, his breath mingling with yours as he grinned. He changed his angle slightly, shifting his hips just enough to hit a spot that sent fireworks exploding behind your eyes. The slick, wet sound of his cock moving in and out of you filled the room, mingling with the gasps and moans you couldn’t hold back. 
Your head fell back, hitting the mirror with a soft thud, and Jihoon chuckled, his lips brushing over the curve of your jaw.
“Careful, baby,” he said, massaging your scalp with a care that made you lean on it. “Can’t have you breaking the mirror just ‘cause I’m fucking you so good.”
Your laugh came out breathless, cut off by a sharp gasp as he suddenly pressed harder on your clit. “Jihoon, please—”
“Please, what?” His thrusts slowed again, torturously so, and he pulled back just enough to make you whine in protest. His fingers tightened on your thighs, holding you in place as he watched you with dark, hooded eyes. Your hands slid to his neck, clinging to him desperately. “Please, gonna cum.”
“You want me to fuck you harder? You want me to make you cum all over my cock, baby? Say it..”
“Want you to fuck me—ngh,” you rolled your eyes.  “Want you to fuck me harder. Make me cum, Jihoon. Please.”
“So wet. God, I could fuck you all night. Don’t think I’d ever get enough of you.” Your walls clenched around him, and he cursed under his breath, his head dropping to your shoulder as he struggled to keep his pace steady. “You’re gonna make me cum if you keep doing it.”
“Then cum,” you whispered insistent. Your fingers tangled in his hair, pulling him closer as your lips brushed over his ear. “Cum for me, Jihoon.”
He groaned, his thrusts growing faster, rougher that you thought that your sink wouldnt handle it. But even as he pushed you closer to the edge, his focus never wavered. “I—shit—I need to make you come first. I have to, baby.”
You shook your head violently, your own orgasm already clawing at the edge of your sanity. “No—no, I’m so close, Jihoon,” you gaspedr. “Just—just keep going, don’t stop—please—”
His hips jerked at your words, his cock twitching deep inside you as his body teetered on the brink of losing control. His thrusts slowed further, unsteady and disjointed as his thumb continued to draw tight, firm circles on your swollen clit.
“You feel so fucking good,” your voice sounded sultry and wrecked, your eyes locking onto his. “So deep—so fucking thick. Jihoon, I can feel you in my stomach. You’re so big, you’re gonna ruin me, baby. Do it. Come inside me. Fill me up.”
That did it.
The sound Jihoon let out wasn’t even human—a choked, strangled mix of a moan and a curse that hit its peak as his body shuddered violently. “Oh—shit—ah, fuck, fuck—!” His cock pulsed hard, the first spurt of his cum hitting so deep inside you that you felt it bloom with warmth against your cervix. You swore you could feel each throb as he came, his hips snapping forward instinctively to bury himself even further, his moans blending into desperate gasps. “Ah—hah—baby—!”
The heat, the pressure, the way his orgasm filled every inch of you—it all tipped you over the edge, dragging you into your own release. Your walls clenched around him, milking him for everything he had as you cried out, “Jihoon—fuck—yes—!”
You arched into him, your hips lifting slightly off the counter to grind against his cock, riding the quakes as your climax ruptured through you. The movement made Jihoon gasp, his hands flying to your hips to still you. “A-ah—fuck—stop—baby, stop—hah—ah, shit—!” His voice cracked as he groaned, overstimulation evident in the way he hissed through gritted teeth. “T-too much—oh my god—aw, fuck—!”
Jihoon’s laughter broke through his moans, a breathless, disbelieving chuckle that melted into another string of curses as he shuddered beneath you.
Finally, you stilled, your body collapsing into his as your head dropped to his shoulder. Both of you were trembling, your breaths ragged and uneven, your hearts pounding in sync.
The room settled into a quiet purr after the chaos. The bathroom was small, its muted light casting soft shadows on the tiles. But in this moment, it might as well have been the biggest place in the world, holding all the unsaid things between you, the weight of your shared history pressing down like a furry coat.
“Do you remember the first time we met?” Jihoon asked suddenly, his voice soft, almost hesitant, like he wasn’t sure he wanted to dig this deep. He looked at you then, his eyes more serious, like he was searching for something in your face.
You laughed, a small, shaky sound. “You mean when you accused me of stealing your recipe for strawberry shortcake at the first days of competition? Yeah, hard to forget.”
His lips quirked up, but it wasn’t quite a smile. “God, I was such an asshole,” he muttered, shaking his head. “I didn’t even taste it. Just saw your name on the board and thought, ‘Oh, great. Another rich kid with connections, swooping in to take what I’ve worked my whole life for.’”
You frowned, your fingers twitching where they rested on his chest. “You really thought that?”
“I didn’t know you,” he admitted, his tone apologetic. “I was so used to fighting for every little thing, you know? Scholarships, internships, a spot on the team—hell, even a secondhand stand mixer. And then you walked in, all… pretty and shiny. I just assumed you’d never struggled for anything in your life.”
You bit your lip, unsure how to respond. Because yeah, he wasn’t wrong—you hadn’t grown up worrying about money or how you’d pay for school. But you’d struggled in other ways, ways that people like Jihoon—driven, hyper-focused, and painfully independent—might not have seen.
“That’s not fair,” you said softly. “You don’t know what I’ve been through. Just because I didn’t have to fight for a secondhand mixer doesn’t mean I haven’t fought for other things.”
“Yeah,” he murmured. “I know that now.”
The quiet between you stretched, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. It felt… cogitative. Like you were both sifting through the memories, pulling them out one by one to examine under the bathroom light.
“The NGO,” you said suddenly, your voice intruding upon the silence. “That’s when everything changed.”
Jihoon nodded, his hands still on your waist, his fingers tightening slightly. “Yeah. When I saw what you were doing—what the competition money was for—I felt like shit. Here I was, thinking you were just some spoiled kid looking for another trophy to add to the shelf, and you were… Something that important.”
You swallowed hard, your throat tight. “It wasn’t just me. It was all of us—Fred, the kids, you. God, Jihoon, you don’t even realize how much you’ve done for this place.”
He shook his head, a self-deprecating smile tugging at his lips. “I don’t know about that. I just… I wanted to help. And honestly, it was selfish at first. I needed a job, and you offered one. But then…”
“Then you fell in love with it.” The journey from strangers to colleagues to whatever this was had been anything but smooth. It had been messy and painful but it had also been beautiful in its own way. “I hated you, you know,” you said suddenly. “At the beginning, I mean. You were so… cold. And I thought, ‘How the hell am I supposed to work with someone who looks like he’d rather set the kitchen on fire than have a conversation with me?’”
He laughed, a genuine sound that softened the strain in the room. “Yeah, I hated you too. Thought you were this privileged, clueless brat who’d never survive a day in a real kitchen.”
“And now?”
“And now…” he bit his lip, analyzing your face as he tilts his head. ��I can’t imagine my life without you in it.”
“Jihoon…”
“I mean it,” he said firmly, his hands moving to cradle your face, his thumbs brushing gently over your cheeks. “You’re… you’re my favorite taste, you know? Out of everything I’ve ever made, ever eaten, ever dreamed of tasting—you’re the one thing I’ll never get enough of.”
You let out a shaky laugh, your heart swelling in your chest. “That’s cheesy as hell.”
“Yeah, well,” he said, his lips quirking up into a small, shy smile. “Sometimes the truth is cheesy.”
Jihoon’s smile faltered just a bit. “Sometimes, though… I wonder if you really forgave me. Like, deep in your heart.”
You blinked, stunned by the sudden shift, and searched his face for more. His brows were slightly furrowed, his jaw tight, like the weight of the question had been pressing on him for longer than he cared to confess.
“Forgave you?” 
“For the way I acted back then,” he said, his gaze dropping briefly before meeting yours again. “The way I doubted you. The things I said, the things I did, the things I thought. I mean… I know we’ve moved past it. But deep down, I’ve always wondered if there’s a part of you that still holds onto it. That maybe you… couldn’t fully forgive me.”
You didn’t even hesitate. “I did,” you said firmly. “I forgave you, Jihoon.”
He tilted his head, skepticism flickering across his features. “How can you be so sure?”
“Because I don’t blame you for it anymore,” you said, leaning into him slightly, needing him to understand. “At that time, I had this picture in my head of what my life was supposed to look like. The glamorous Michelin-starred restaurant, the prestige, the accolades… It was all I wanted.”
“And I ruined it.”
“No,” you said firmly, reaching up to cup his cheek. “You didn’t ruin anything. If anything, you gave me something better.”
His eyes searched yours, still unconvinced. “But what if… what if I hadn’t? What if I hadn’t been so bitter, so determined to take you down? What if your dessert had won anyway?”
You paused, the weight of the question settling between you. “Or what if I’d won, Jihoon? What if I’d walked away with the title and the prestige and never thought about anything else? What if the organization never existed because I was too busy chasing some dream that wasn’t even mine anymore?”
He frowned at that, his lips pressing into a thin line. “You think… things were meant to happen this way?”
“I don’t know,” you admitted, your voice softening. “But I’d rather believe that they were. That everything—every fight, every misstep, every moment we wanted to strangle each other—led us here. To this.”
Jihoon let out a quiet laugh, shaking his head. “You always were the optimistic one.”
“Not always,” you said with a small smile. “But I am about this. About us. About what we’ve built together.”
He exhaled slowly, his gaze dropping to where his hands rested on your hips. “You know… I think about it sometimes. The restaurant, I mean. How it’s under new management now. How I used to dream about a place like that—sleek, modern, perfect. And then I look at what we’ve done with the organization, and it’s… messy and chaotic, but so beautifull. Like it actually matters.”
“It does matter… And maybe that’s the point. Maybe the restaurant was never supposed to be our story. Maybe this is.”
He looked at you then, something shining in his eyes. “You really think so?”
“I know so,” you said, your lips curving into a gentle smile. “Because if it wasn’t, we wouldn’t be here. We wouldn’t have the kids, the bakery, the messes we can’t clean up without three people and a prayer.”
He chuckled at that. “The messes are your fault, you know. You’re the one who thought it was a good idea to teach a bunch of middle schoolers how to make éclairs.”
You grinned, leaning into him. “And you’re the one who decided to teach them soufflés.”
He rolled his eyes, but his smile was soft. “Well played.”
As you looked at him—messy hair, tired eyes, and a softness in his expression that you rarely saw—you felt something settle in your chest.
“Jihoon,” you said quietly. “I wouldn’t change a thing.”
— // Two Years Later // —
The NGO was quieter than usual. You noticed it the moment you stepped inside. Normally, the kitchen buzzed with the chaos of kids laughing, mixing ingredients, and occasionally bickering over who got to use the electric mixer. But today, there was an eerie calm.
“Hello?” you called out, setting your bag down on the counter. The faint scent of something baking lingered in the air, but it wasn’t enough to mask the odd tension. “Where is everyone?”
You wandered into the main hall, expecting to see at least Jihoon with his clipboard, corralling the kids into some elaborate baking lesson. Instead, the room was empty save for a lone piece of paper taped to the center of one of the tables.
“Come to the garden.”
Your eyebrows furrowed. The garden? The small plot out back that you and Jihoon had transformed into a herb and flower garden over countless weekends?
Curious, you made your way outside, the warm sunlight spilling over the neatly trimmed rows of basil and lavender. At first glance, the garden seemed empty too, until you heard the faint giggle of one of the kids.
“Okay, who’s hiding?” you called out, scanning the area.
Suddenly, the kids burst out from behind the hedges, each holding a small bouquet of flowers, their faces lit with excitement. “Surprise!” they shouted in unison, running toward you and handing you the mismatched bundles.
“What is this?” you asked, laughing as you tried to catch all the flowers being shoved into your arms.
But before anyone could answer, Jihoon appeared at the edge of the garden, looking uncharacteristically nervous. He was dressed neatly, his usually casual outfit swapped for a crisp white shirt and a pair of dark slacks. His hands were shoved into his pockets, and his lips quirked up in a nervous smile as he approached.
“Jihoon?” you asked, your heart skipping a beat.
The kids scrambled to the side, forming a small semi-circle as Jihoon stepped closer. He stopped just in front of you, his dark eyes locking onto yours.
“You always said this garden was your favorite place,” he began. “You said it’s where you felt the most at peace, where everything feels real. So I thought it was the perfect place to do this.”
Your heart raced as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a small velvet box.
“Yah… What are you doing Jihoon-ah?,” you whispered, your voice trembling.
He dropped to one knee, the kids giggling in soft gasps and excited murmurs. “I’ve spent the last two years trying to figure out how I got so lucky. How someone as stubborn and chaotic as me ended up with someone as kind and brilliant as you. And honestly? I still don’t know.”
You laughed softly, tears already welling in your eyes.
“But what I do know… is that I don’t want to spend another day without you. You changed my life, and you keep changing it, every single day. So…” He opened the box, revealing a delicate ring with a big, oval, sparkling diamond. “Will you marry me?”
The kids broke out into cheers before you could even process what was happening. Your hands flew to your mouth as you nodded quickly, too swamped to speak. Jihoon’s grin spread wide as he stood, slipping the ring onto your finger before pulling you into a tight hug.
“Yes,” you finally managed to say, your voice muffled against his buff chest. “Of course, yes.”
The kids swarmed around you both, cheering and hugging as Jihoon pressed a kiss to your temple. “I had a lot of help,” he admitted with a soft laugh, gesturing toward the group. “They’re surprisingly good at keeping secrets.”
“Well, I can’t believe you pulled this off,” you said, laughing through your tears as you looked down at the ring.
“I had to,” Jihoon said, his voice soft and sincere. “Because I wanted to give you a moment as perfect as you’ve made my life.”
The kids had prepared cupcakes with little fondant hearts on top, and the staff brought out bottles of sparkling cider to toast the two of you. Jihoon never left your side, his hand warm and steady in yours, his smile never fading.
As the sun set over the garden, painting the sky in hues of orange and pink, you leaned into Jihoon’s side, the ring catching the last rays of light.
He tilted his head to look at you, his lips quirking into a soft smile. “You know, I was thinking,” he started, “when we’re, like, seventy or something, do you think we’ll still be able to handle all the chaos the kids bring?”
You snorted a laugh, turning to face him fully. “Seventy? Jihoon, I’m not even sure we’re handling it well now.”
He laughed with you. “What happens when we’re too old to keep up with their energy? You know they’re just going to keep multiplying, right? They bring their friends, their siblings, their cousins… It’s like a never-ending kid buffet in there.”
You shook your head, leaning into his side. “First of all, let’s not talk about being seventy when we just got engaged. Can I at least have a honeymoon phase before we’re planning for wheelchairs and dentures?”
He raised an eyebrow, his lips curling into that naughty smirk. “Honeymoon~?” he drawled.
You rolled your eyes, biting back the grin tugging at your lips. 
“And you’re stuck with me now,” he teased, waggling his eyebrows before leaning back, the smirk still firmly in place. “So, where are we going for this so-called honeymoon? Somewhere romantic? Tropical? Or do you just want to stay in and let me make you dinner—while wearing nothing but an apron?”
fanfic inspiration by @thepoopdokyeomtouched thank you for giving me the motivation to write this fic! you're the sweetener to my blog's flavor. wishing you all the best this holiday season!
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moonstruckme · 5 months ago
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Ok, your little jily about hypothermia gave me the urge to see :
The reaction to the marauders to you falling through the ice. Like you were skating on the Black Lake with Sirius and James because they convinced you (against you initial worry) while Remus stands off to the side and watches (the most unsure and worried of them)
And I can see James and Sirius trying to race each other as you try to get a hand of ice skating. Then a crack and you fall through.
It’s like you know that scene with Amy in Little woman
I would totally get if you don’t like it since you’ve just written a similar one.
Your work is amazing ! Hope everything is ok for you ❤️
Thank you lovely <3
cw: ice skating trauma?
poly!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 1k words
It’s just like Sirius and James to goad you out onto the lake and then get bored of you when—as you tried to warn them—you can’t skate. James is fizzing with energy, promising to come back as soon as he makes one quick round of the cove, and of course when he challenges Sirius to a race your boyfriend is too competitive to decline. 
They take off at light speed, blades schwicking across the dark ice. Remus, sitting bundled up on land, eyes you worriedly over the top of his book. 
“Be careful,” he warns, not for the first time. 
You are nervous, with no handholds and no boyfriends to help you, but you’re eager to reassure him. “Don’t worry.” You smile. “I’m not going to go racing after them.” 
Remus returns your smile, and, mollified, returns to his book. 
The ice on the Black Lake is far from pristine. There are dips and ridges, and soon you find yourself being channeled down curving paths away from the shore, hardly moving your skates and arms out to your sides for balance. The ice beneath your feet begins to look darker, less of the frosty sheen or slashes from other skates. It feels smoother, too. 
You let yourself glide forward, raising your head to see if any of your boyfriends are looking to witness your success. The first crack is a light sound. Almost negligible, but it gets your attention. You scream as the ice falls out from beneath you. 
The cold shocks you down to your bones, freezing the blood in your veins and pressing in on your lungs. Instinct propels you upwards. 
“H—help!” 
Your voice is a tight cry. The air doesn’t feel much better, colder even, but you try to stay above the surface, the blades on your feet slicing uselessly through the water below. Each time you try to grasp at a piece of ice and pull yourself onto it, it breaks away. Your breaths are gasping, panicked puffs that send white clouds into the air in front of you. 
You can hear your boyfriends shouting. 
“Pads, wait—wait—” 
Sirius is crawling towards you on the ice, another shape moving quickly in your direction. 
“Accio branch!” 
James tosses the long stick to Sirius, who holds it out for you to grab onto. The bark bites into your palms, but you don’t let go as both boys use it to drag you out, ice jutting into your middle. As soon as you’re out to your hip you’re in Sirius’ embrace, his strong arms bringing you closer and helping you pull your legs from the water. 
“You’re okay,” he says, firmly. As though daring anyone to prove him wrong. “You’re okay, baby, we’ve got you. We have you.” 
James and Sirius keep you tucked between them, pushing you on dripping skates and wobbly legs to the edge of the lake. Remus looks like he tried to come out wearing his shoes. His face has drained of its wintery flush, brow set tense with worry. 
Sirius helps him back to the shore, but not before Remus casts a warming charm on you. You give an odd shiver at the change. 
“How’s that, angel?” James scrubs a hand up and down your arm. His voice is light, but its lightness is so forced and so different from his exuberant tone of a few minutes ago. 
Remus pulls you into a hug as you start to cry. Tiny sobs mixed with shivers, your frame shaking in every way possible. Remus holds you securely to him as he lowers you both to the ground. He casts another warming charm for good measure. 
“You’re lucky she didn’t get dragged under by the grindylows,” he says with your head tucked beneath his chin. He sounds angry, but it’s quickly succumbing to weariness. His arms wind around you tighter. 
“We didn’t know she’d try and go into the middle!” Sirius argues as he kneels beside you, James at his side. Your boyfriend’s face is lined with guilt as he reaches for you, unsticking a damp piece of hair from your cheek. 
“How was she supposed to know?”
“Sorry,” you offer wobbily. Each of them makes some sound of sympathy. 
“No, sweetheart, it’s not your fault,” Remus soothes, covering your cheek with his warm hand. James rubs up your calf from your ankle as though he intends to warm you inch by inch. “It was only your first time, you couldn’t have known.” 
“Yeah,” James agrees, “you’re fine, lovie. Nobody said for you to be sorry.” 
You try on a smile. There’s snot frozen above your top lip. “So I can only be sorry when you say?” 
“Yes,” says Sirius, very seriously. 
He grins when you laugh. Remus cracks, too, and James looks relieved at no longer being scolded. Sirius smooths another piece of hair from your face, looking at you carefully. 
“You okay, baby?” 
“I’m okay,” you confirm. “The warming charms are helping a lot. Thanks, Rem.” 
“That’s our Moony.” Sirius smiles at him, clearly eager to be back in your boyfriend’s good graces. “Always knows the perfect spell.” 
“You know that one, too,” Remus grumbles as James starts to unlace your skates for you. “You could’ve done it the moment you got her out.” 
“Ah, but we’re not all as quick on our feet as you, you swot.” 
“Do you think you can walk back inside?” James asks you, slipping your shoes on. “One of us could go get some tea from the great hall while you warm up in the common room.” 
“Fuck that,” says Sirius. “I know where Slughorn keeps his nice cocoa now. I’d say we’re entitled to some of that after our trials.” 
“One of us is,” Remus corrects him drily. 
“Right, then.” James takes your hands, standing you up slowly and fitting an arm around your waist for support. If the wet of your clothes chills him, he doesn’t complain. “We’ll pilfer enough of Slughorn’s cocoa for one person, and you’ll be good as new by dinner.” 
“I already feel okay,” you try to reassure him. 
“Shh, shh.” Remus takes you by the hand, squeezing gently. “Don’t correct them. Take your dues.”
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luvvixu · 11 months ago
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mind over matter pt. 2
synopsis: witness how your marriage was bound to fall apart with you on the front seat and your husband gojo had missed the show—now, he gotta figure out the story on his own.
content: arrange marriage au, angst, husband!gojo, mean!gojo, mention of blood, strong languages, some unsettling scenarios, emotional trauma, read at your own risk
a/n: couldn't still believe that this ff blew up like tysm for all of your support! and thank you so much for waiting~ and like always, this is not proofread lol
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previous / masterlist / next
“if i'm not mistaken, the mission would take at least three to four business days.” yaga passes satoru a sheet of paper where it contains all of the information he needed to know and what kind of things he should focus on investigating.
satoru looked at his former teacher in uncertainty despite the blindfold in his eyes. he's very hesitant to take the mission not because he cannot beat this curse, but because he still needs to apologize to you as soon as possible.
“yaga, c—can i not…” satoru was about to continue when he suddenly trailed off.
“not what?” yaga raises his eyebrow.
but to think that it's all his fault, he must have really hurted you this time, and you wouldn't probably hear him out that easily. that is why satoru thinks that it is best to just give you some space as of now, and when he comes back from his mission, that is the time when he would bother you with his presence.
“it's nothing. i’ll be taking my leave now.”
“very well—” before yaga could even finish his sentence, satoru already vanished in thin air.
the duo, yuuji and megumi, was on their way to visit you just like what they had promised to themselves a while ago.
it was around eight o'clock in the evening and here they are, kind of tiptoeing through the hallway where your room is located.
“i think it's better to let her know our presence first.” megumi said quietly to the pink haired male while holding out a basket with foods that are suitable for digestion of a pregnant lady.
“then it wouldn't be a surprise if we told her.” yuuji then answered. he was carrying two board games on his left arm and a uno card on his right hand. you actually once told them that you were exceptionally good at these kinds of games, so yuuji wanted to test that out.
suddenly, the two boys stopped in front of a door where they immediately froze at the smell of something oddly familiar. “me…megumi, is this y/n sensei’s room?” yuuji slowly mumbles out a word, his eyes going wide.
however, megumi didn't answer him. instead, he immediately tries to open the door without any hesitation just to know that it is locked.
panic slashed across their faces as the smell of blood coming out of your room becomes the leading factor of their franticness behavior.
“y/n sensei! are you there?!” yuuji keeps on calling out to you while megumi does the door breaking.
“it's locked! i can’t break the door!” curse these doors in jujutsu high. megumi could not help but to mumble profanities when he remembered that the doors in jujutsu high are purposely made this strong so any invading curses could not sneak in especially during sleeping hours where most of the sorcerers are vulnerable.
“itadori! call yaga sensei and shoko-san, quick!” megumi screamed at the other boy, whom he instantly obliged.
a weave of panic surge on their bodies because you are involved in this situation. not to mention, you are pregnant on top of that and that puts the situation into a more nerve-wracking experience.
sweat drips on megumi’s forehead as he still tries to break the door. kicks and punches were made but still the door wouldn't flinch his attacks. the idea of using his curse technique came into his mind but he's afraid that it would worsen the situation.
sooner and faster, yuuji came back with the two elders running faster than before. both also have a panic flash on their faces as yaga begins to break the door with his insane force. and after countless tries, he successfully invades the door.
everybody froze at the sight, because there they saw you, lying unconsciously in a pool of your blood that trickled down on your lower body.
“shit! what happened?!” shoko was the first to react and immediately came closer to you to check your pulse, it was there but weak. then shoko proceeds to check your baby's heartbeat, and to her disappointment, there was none that she could detect.
“yaga sensei, please help me get y/n to my clinic. now!” without a further do, yaga carefully lifted up your body and then proceeded to follow the frantic shoko to her said clinic.
on the other hand, yuuji and megumi watch the two elders quickly move away from the scene and that leaves the two. they had been quiet all the time, probably still traumatized because they just saw one of their teachers (plus with an unborn child) on the literal verge of dying.
megumi's eyes trailed on the pool of blood that had been sitting on your floor. he could tell that you had been unconscious for like way past an hour now due to some parts of the blood being fresh while some parts were dried.
“what the hell just happened…?” yuuji was still flabbergasted. he would never expect that this would happen when he just visualizes this night as a fun one because he got everything ready for a surprise mini party to cheer you up.
“i don't know.” megumi solemnly answered.
“...do you think y/n sensei and her baby would be alright?” yuuji added, totally worried about your situation.
for the first time in his life, megumi didn't think he that would utter the same word but with a different tone, different meaning, and in a different situation.
“i…i don't know.”
satoru gojo was busy walking through the busy street of roppongi despite the sky being nighttime. the whole atmosphere was still so lively from bright signage up to crowded night market stalls. this makes a perfect night for a perfect leisure.
but satoru isn't here to do that. he was supposed to do a job and finish it as soon as possible so he could get back to you and finally do the right thing.
he was about to enter an abandoned building when he received a phone call. without looking at the caller, he answered.
“what?”
“where are you?” it was his corporate friend, nanami.
a teasing smile made it into his demeanor. “oh wow! here is my underclassmen calling me first—!”
“i am asking you, where are you?” nanami was clearly not in the mood for his bullshit. his tone was beyond serious and it made satoru wonder if something happened.
“i'm in roppongi. somewhere behind a luxurious night bar.” gojo said.
the moment he said his address, the phone suddenly dropped. confused, the six eyes looked at his phone then just shrugged it off. for the second time, he was about to enter the said building when someone appeared from behind.
“you should go back.” there he saw nanami, breathless as he tried to catch his breath. looks like he ran his way towards his location.
“yo, my man! what are you doing he—”
“go back to the jujutsu high. i’ll be taking your mission here.” nanami explained like he was .
did something happen? was on satoru's mind.
“why?” satoru dropped all of his mischievousness as it was replaced by his unhidden worry—you were literally there at the jujutsu high.
there was a pause on nanami, he seemed very hesitant to say it and satoru was growing impatient.
“just say it nanami—”
“yaga asked me to take your mission on your behalf after something happened. it's about your wife. she was found unconscious in her room.”
never ever in his life he could feel the quickest adrenaline rush in his body as nanami didn't even manage to utter the last syllables of his sentence when satoru already uses his technique and teleports himself towards your room back in jujutsu high.
and there, he was welcomed by the janitors of the said school, mopping the dried liquid on the floor. the smell was so familiar that it made his body tremble in a span of a second.
“w-what the fuck happened here?” he asked the janitor who looked at him in pity as he continued to solemnly wipe the floor.
“miss y/n was found unconscious and there was blood…in her lower area.”
blood, y/n, unconscious, my wife, danger, the baby…my baby!
that was the only thing that came into his mind as he went out of the hallway and ran somewhere he wasn't aware of. his mind raced with negative thoughts.
and since his life is not always about sugarcoating—he thought that probably you just had a miscarriage, got attacked by some curses, or worse, you're dead. his wife, you, were hurt when he was away and not even there to at least protect you.
unbeknownst, to the man, tears were threatening to slip down his six eyes, making his blindfold become wet as it was being absorbed by his tears constantly. satoru could feel that his body was filled with self-loathing, guilt, and regret all over his system.
“satoru.” a voice called him from behind. satoru does not need to turn around to know who it was. it was yaga.
“come to my office.” without waiting for him, yaga already left with satoru trailing behind him. taking off his blindfold, satoru wiped the tears that were about to fall.
when they arrived at yaga’s office, he saw his two students, yuuji and megumi, sitting quietly by the couch. they were both acting quietly odd, like they knew what was going on too.
“where's y/n?” satoru asked.
“do you want to know what happened first?” yaga avoided his question for now. instead, he goes into the other aspect that he's been wondering too. satoru fell quiet, so yaga took it as a yes.
the principal looked at the two students who were already looking at him. sighing deeply, yaga then proceeds to start explaining.
“y/n was found unconscious by these two. it has been over an hour since she's been in that situation judging by the dryness of her blood. right now, we still had no idea about her state since shoko's the one who's been handling the situation. and it's been a while too since we have seen her.”
“and the baby…i'm sorry, gojo. but we have no idea either.” yaga sighed heavily. satoru was all silent, he couldn't bring himself to utter any word. he was too caught up about the situation that he had so many things to say to the point that he couldn't figure out where to start.
“i know it's not my business to interfere but…did something happen that leads to this?” the principal asked the strongest. the next moment was something that everyone expected—they did not receive any response from the man.
suddenly, the door burst open, revealing the tired doctor. her eyes landed on your husband who's still frozen about your condition. on the other hand, satoru was too busy drowning himself with his thoughts to notice shoko in the room.
“itadori, megumi…go back to your dorm for now. it's getting late and i’ll just update you two tomorrow.” shoko scurry the two younger boys and they obliged.
as the door in yaga's office closed, the three grown-ups fell into a silent atmosphere, only the sound of the air ventilation could be heard inside.
“h-how’s y/n and the child?” yaga was the first one to speak among the three. but shoko's attention was drawn to gojo only and gojo was still unable to move.
“her situation was so severe that we needed to put her into a hospital as soon as possible.” shoko said quietly and directed to gojo only. her eyes were trailed to him, and only him. she wants him to taste the bitter medicine of his aftermath and she is going to make sure he's taking it.
call her brutal and cruel, but in your realm of marriage where her role is only being a worried close friend, she would choose you over everything. that's how much she cares for you. shoko could see what kind of person you are, and she believes that you deserve better than what you are right now.
sure, gojo was right when he said that she'd only known you for a short period of time. but that is enough for her to determine that she is going to stick by your side whatever may happen. because she knows how a gojo satoru works, she knows what kind of person he could be.
if gojo can manage to leave shoko out in his life, then he could do it to y/n too.
“she was bleeding too much, i'm afraid it has to do with the child. so if we don't act fast, we might have to choose who to save—are we going to save y/n and lose the baby? are we going to save the baby and lose y/n? or…what if we lose them both—”
*boogsh!*
a sudden explosion was seen. the four walls inside yaga’s office have officially become three when satoru couldn't handle his emotions that he let his cursed energy slip and create a hole into one of yaga’s walls. the impact was so strong that it literally shook the whole jujutsu high.
and surprisingly, none of the three inside the scene was scratched, just emotionally taken aback. the once gojo satoru who couldn't even utter a word earlier, was now looking at shoko with a mixture of menace, trouble, anger, grief, and…extreme sadness.
shoko ties his stare, looking equivalently. “did you hear what i said, gojo? your wife and your baby are currently facing the grim reaper. do you understand that?” she said calmly but there is a hit or hardness into her tone.
“shut up! fucking shut up!” another surge of curse energy flows in different directions, making yaga and shoko feel goosebumps on how strong it is.
“satoru!” yaga yelled in panic.
“where is she? where the fuck is she?! show me where she is!” satoru screamed at the doctor. shoko, whose face is now back to emotionless, decides to subside her annoyance to the man as she knows you are the top priority right now.
“i will let you see her. but once you see her, you have to teleport us into the hospital immediately if you still want to see her open her eyes.” shoko said seriously. thankfully, satoru managed to calm himself alone and just stared at shoko, waiting for her to continue.
“y/n was experiencing placenta abruption. it's a very serious complication in her case because the placenta in the inner wall of her uterus is completely detached. it greatly affects the baby’s supply of oxygen and nutrients and the situation causes her to bleed heavily.”
“i immediately minimize the bleeding but i cannot guarantee the two's safety, especially the baby, since it is not worth the risk to imply cursed energy to an unborn child—” before shoko could even finished explaining, satoru already stormed out of the room and just proceeds to the room where his guts tell you where. he was being followed by shoko who was screaming at him.
opening one of the doors, there he saw you all pale. he could feel your cursed energy barely beating, and that scared the shit out of him because that indicates your weakness.
“o-oh god…” satoru couldn't help but to feel his breathing pattern becoming irregular as a single tear followed by another drop from his gorgeous powerful blue eyes.
this can't be happening. you were just fine a while ago!
“y/n, oh my g-god! my wife…” gojo satoru, known by his title as the strongest sorcerer in his generation, was seen crying over his dying wife and dying unborn child. his tall figure was trembling in tangled emotions that he couldn't even determine the two ends.
“sorry to ruin your moment, but if you want to save your family, it's better for us to keep moving now.” shoko followed the suit, still savage as ever.
gojo does what she said and teleports the three of you into the bestest hospital that he knows. ignoring the toll on his cursed energy as it took more, more than the usual usage, satoru believes that your well-being should be his priority rather than his.
when they arrived, shoko immediately started to bump the people out of the way and started to call for help. “someone! get us to an emergency!” she screamed.
meanwhile, satoru keeps your body close to him. hugging your frame ever so delicately, scared that you might break or disappear.
a man like satoru gojo, whom to some called him a man-god, find himself crying out to every gods and deities out there to help you, to help him get this through. he prays and prays to keep you safe and how he's sorry for all of the things he would do.
for sure, he knew this sudden care for you is not born out of pity or regret, it is a late realization on how much he couldn't bear to see you like this. because deep inside him, satoru couldn't deny the warm feeling of having someone that was waiting for him to come home, provide him service, and even give him a bundle of joy.
the words he swore to himself that he doesn't need a wife to console his woes as he is completely capable of being by himself was getting eaten by his current self. served on a silver platter, satoru didn't mind eating his own words.
a stretcher was bought on sight and shoko instructed him to put your body there and watch the series of doctors rush your body into the emergency room. satoru watches the light above the door where you were in turns red, signaling that it requires immediate medical attention.
placing his traumatized body on one of the cold walls of the hospital, sliding his man shoulders and crumbling himself into small pieces to make himself as small as possible. never he would have thought that the night would end with him continuing to pray for your safety.
satoru didn't realize that he dozed off within the walls of a random corner of a hospital where he brought you in. he only realized his current situation when he could feel someone kicking his lower body constantly.
opening his tired eyes, he saw shoko eyeing him while still continuing to nudge him. “good, you're awake.” she said.
it feels like a surge of energy flows to his body and it immediately makes him rise up faster than he could. that was also when he started to feel all of the aches in his body just from sleeping in that kind of position.
“fuck, my whole body aches.” he mumbles to himself. satoru was about to stretch himself when he saw the time on the wall.
5:05 AM
and then his eyes landed on the door.
there was no red light anymore.
“y/n. shoko, where's y/n?!” anxiousness washed all over his body. he didn't know what to expect on what answers he's about to receive regarding his family condition.
meanwhile, shoko thinks that gojo looked like a lost puppy on how his eyes literally beg for a positive answer. despite his six foot frame, he looks like a poor and desperate child.
“the operation ended an hour ago. y/n was now stable and goy transferred into one of the private rooms. while the baby…” she pauses.
“w-what? what happened to my baby?” shoko almost grimaces the way satoru addresses the unborn child, wondering where the hell did he get the guts to say that.
the doctor was this close to brutally and savagely roast this man until he flew in shame—that’s how mad, angry, and upset shoko from what satoru did to you. but today is not the suitable day for that, she may be cruel but she had limits. so, shoko forcefully swallowed the harsh words and decided to just put it aside.
“the baby was delivered early through cesarean, it's the only way to save y/n and the child. the baby is currently in a neonatal intensive care unit where the bestest doctors monitor the child until it reaches mature development.”
so basically, you give birth to his child. satoru couldn't explain what he's feeling right now. he's happy for the baby, and yet at the same time, he feels really undeserving, but he still wants to be part of the child's life—this is too complicated for him.
and besides, this is not the right time to contemplate. because as a husband and father, he needed to stay with his family to provide them love, support, and to patch that once had been wounded. and he's going to start with…
“can i go and see y/n?” deep inside him, satoru felt ridiculous for asking that question since he is the literal husband! or was he? after everything he had done to her for five years?
shoko then tiredly pointed at the room at the end of the hallway and satoru, with the help of his long legs, never ran faster than his whole life.
gently opening the door in your room, satoru was greeted by your peaceful and sleeping form with all of the tubes connected on the back of your hand. closing the door behind him, satoru finally let go of the tears he's been holding the whole time, ranging from the confrontation with you until to to this situation.
sitting on the chair beside your bed, satoru weeps as he holds your arm. at this moment, the strongest no longer exists, it was just gojo satoru who couldn't stop himself from muttering an apology to his wife that he did so wrong.
they say, you would only realize the importance of something when it's now late. satoru would absolutely agree to that statement and he could even provide proofs and evidence. at first, he's being a total dick and douchebag to his wife who clearly doesn't even do anything wrong to him. then his own wife endured all of his actions for the whole five years and still remained as if their relationship could be only determined on a sheet of paper.
“i'm sorry. i'm so sorry.” satoru may not know what would happen the moment you would open your eyes. would you send him away? or would you let him stay despite all of the pain and trauma he caused you? for now, he can never know.
but one thing he's going to let you know, he's going to change for you and for his baby. he's done doing things for himself, and now, he should focus on you.
and he's going to start with cutting all of his ties to his mistress.
[part 3 is now posted! for those who wanted to be tagged, just say it on the comments — ©luvvixu2024]
taglists: @mistymuii @kalopsia-flaneur @sherryuki-callmeyuki @tttttttf @slyhersophia @rirk-ke @username23345 @lvstru @neteyxms
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ohburgee · 1 month ago
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(Climbs out of the window for the third time)
Ok, I actually had an idea for another request. Spouse & Killer!Reader x 007n7 scenario, except you don't remember him due to head trauma before getting forsaken, and then, have a "John Doe moment" when you meet each other and fall in love with 7n7 all over again. (Because in canon, John Doe would fall in love with Jane all over again if he met her again, LOL) (Also, you probably take care of c00lkid outside of rounds despite questioning why this kid calls you his parent)
(Throws myself out of window... For the third time)
-- Window Anon (because it's funny to me to be called that)
Oh my this is so beautiful idea scenario, and first time writing 007n7 :] Well here your requests you been waiting for thank you for your cute angst request. Sorry for sudden gone I was just got busy on my college stuffs :'> Also the italics on first one is from 7n7 and the two rest is from you.
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Another round, another fight for survival.
007n7 is exhausted from playing this deadly game, but he has no choice, he must survive and help the other survivors. As he works alongside Builderman to repair a generator, he suddenly feels a chilling sensation, as if someone is watching them. His instincts scream at him.
"Watch out!" 7n7 warns Builderman.
Just as the words leave his mouth, a blade slashes through the air. Thankfully, both of them manage to dodge just in time, dropping low to the ground. 7n7 quickly glances up and sees the attacker, it's you.
You're gripping a blade, your expression twisted with rage, eyes locked onto Builderman. You move in to strike again, but suddenly, You hesitate.
Your gaze lands on 7n7, and something inside you shifts. Memories begin to flicker in your mind, struggling to surface.
"I want you. I want to be with you."
7n7 sees you clutch your head as if in pain, confusion flashing across your face. He doesn't waste the moment. "Run!" he shouts at Builderman, and the two take off in opposite directions.
Shaking off your thoughts, you snap back to the chase, your instincts driving you forward. You pursue them across the map, weaving through obstacles. Builderman disappears into one path while 7n7 takes another, unknowingly separating himself.
7n7 pushes forward as fast as he can, but in his rush, he stumbles over scattered debris. When he looks up, he sees you sprinting toward him.
Thinking fast, he activates his cloning ability. In an instant, two identical versions of himself break off in different directions. You pause, momentarily confused, before chasing after the clone.
7n7 lets out a breath of relief, until the pain hits.
A sharp sting blooms in his shoulder, and he collapses to one knee. He grits his teeth and yanks the blade out, blood seeping through his clothes. Then, heavy footsteps approach.
Jason.
7n7 exhales, closing his eyes, bracing himself for the inevitable. But the final strike never comes.
Instead, he hears the sound of metal clashing against metal. His eyes snap open, you're standing in front of him, blocking Jason’s attack.
"I'm going to protect you no matter what. Even if I bleed to death, I'll protect you."
7n7 stares, wide-eyed and bewildered. You keep your stance firm, eyes locked onto Jason, ready to strike if he moves any closer.
"Go!" you yell.
He hesitates but obeys, scrambling to his feet and running. Jason watches him escape, then turns to you. "You're letting a survivor go?" he questions, unimpressed.
You quickly convince him to focus on hunting the others instead. After a tense moment, Jason relents, walking away.
When you turn back, 7n7 is still there, staring at you.
"7n7, my dear, I'll always be here with you."
He stops in his tracks, caught in your gaze.
He knows why you act this way. You always lose your memories due to the curse placed upon you when you were turned into a killer.
And yet, despite that, you never attack him.
From the moment he learned of your fate, 7n7 never once resented you. He never hated you. Because no matter what, you are still his wife, His beloved wife.
The day he lost you shattered his heart into pieces. But every round, you prove something to him. Even though you are a killer, you don't harm him. You just watch, then disappear into the darkness.
And that alone gives 7n7 hope. Hope that somewhere, deep inside, you’re still there.
Hope that you still remember him.
Hope that one day, he’ll have you back.
Bonus Scene
Outside the game, in the resting area, you are slumped over a table, head resting on your arms. Exhaustion weighs on your body from the endless chases.
Something pokes your hand. You ignore it.
Then it happens again. And again.
With a tired sigh, you crack your eyes open, only to find a small red looking child staring up at you.
"Can I sit beside you?" he asks, looking at you like a lost puppy.
You sigh again but nod.
He immediately sits beside you, his eyes never leaving you. Then, without warning, he wraps his arms around your waist, hugging you tightly.
You gasp, sitting up in shock. "Wha—?"
You swear, this kid has been following you, clinging to you, talking only to you. He keeps insisting that you have a responsibility to take care of him.
You exhale heavily but, after a moment, place a gentle hand on his back.
His warmth seeps into you, and for the first time in a long while, a small smile tugs at your lips.
A tiny bit of comfort isn’t so bad.
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hades--baby · 7 months ago
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To Die Like This
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Summary: Stuck in the Tundra with a bullet in your side, blood in your eye, and the agonizing feeling that your captain was going to throw an absolute fit when your bleeding body walked through the threshold of the safe house.
Note: There's just something about Price being so tender with the girl he loves that makes me go absolutely crazy. Anyway, it's been a long time since I've written anything and an even longer time since I've actually put something out. Hope y'all enjoy :)
(This work was also cross-posted on my ao3 account under hades_baby)
Word Count: 7109
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You had always loved the serenity of a snowy forest. 
They were typically peaceful and quiet, a drastic contrast to your usual life of gunfire and warfare. 
The only things that ever really made a sound was the light crunch of snow beneath the thick soles of boots, the little animals scurrying from shrubs to burrows that led to their dens, and the winter birds chirping their little songs as they hopped from branch to branch. 
The air was always so crisp with a light scent of fresh pine and bark. It lacked the smell of gunpowder and the musk that filled the tight barracks. 
Honestly, if you could have it your way, you’d die in a forest like this. 
Have your trauma-ridden life end in a place so ethereal. 
The whole military life never really gave you what you wanted though. 
You typically had to take what you could get.  
The orders you were given weren’t to your liking? 
Too bad, you’d have to follow them anyway. 
The mission you were assigned to was in the middle of the fucking Tundra where you knew your fingers would freeze and you’d never be able to keep warm? 
You’re getting on the damn plane and going anyway because you were told to. 
A lead slugger was shot into your side and you were currently bleeding through your gear and you wanted to do nothing more than lay down in the snow and let the cold take you while the little blood you had left in your system melted the snow beneath your limp body? 
Well, too fucking bad. Get the fuck up because your Captain doesn’t take too kindly to any of his soldiers dying on the job. 
Yeah. 
You didn’t really get your way when it came to being a soldier, but today might have been your lucky day. 
That little snowy death wish that had been playing out in the back of your head for the past thirty minutes was starting to look like it might come true. 
There was a small burning bullet set in your side, a nice little slash on your arm from a bowie knife that had once been stuck in another man’s chest, and there was a cheeky little gash somewhere on your head that was pouring enough blood into your left eye to make you shut it and trek around half blind. 
It felt like you were getting too old for this kind of work. 
Then again, if Price could still keep up with this shit and be chipper doing it, then so could you. 
“What’s your ETA, Frost?”
His voice over your comms had startled you. 
“I don’t fucking know,” you snapped in a breathy tone as you slammed against the side of a pine tree to brace yourself before you could fall flat on your face. The fresh powder beneath you was starting to look really enticing. 
You closed your good eye—the one that hadn’t been flooded with blood—and let out a defeated sigh, dipping your head as you tried to catch your breath and not focus on the stinging sensation of all the wounds that riddled your body. 
“Sorry,” you muttered, apologizing to your Captain for your tone. You glanced at the watch on your wrist to check your current coordinates. “I’m a klick out from the safehouse. I should be there in a bit.”
“Copy.”
Price left it at that. 
He sounded tired. 
It was the same tone he spoke in when he was stuck in his office, getting dragged down into the depths with paperwork and mission reports he didn’t even want to think about. The tone that would come out when someone tried to talk to him too soon after a mission when all he wanted to do was relax and work the knots out of his shoulders. The tone that you heard oh so often when you’d pop into his office to keep him company while he dotted his i’s and crossed his t’s and when you’d work your fingers into the knots and sore spots on his back until he nearly fell asleep in his office chair. 
Fuck. 
You needed to get a move on.
After taking a deep breath, you trekked on, using every other tree to keep yourself upright as you staggered on your tired feet. 
Blood was seeping through all of your gear, some of it dripping into the pristine white powder beneath your feet. It was tragic how the deep crimson liquid stained the gorgeous snow. In your line of work, you had seen blood stain an array of surfaces, but snow seemed to be the worst of them. It was something that was meant to be clean and pure, yet here you were, ruining it. 
A grimace fell over your face at the sight. 
After a few minutes passed by, your legs met the threshold of movement and you slammed into another tree trunk. Your temple met the bark, wood scratching against the skin of your face. You closed your eyes as you tried to catch your breath and focus on not passing out while your limbs buzzed in pain. 
You could make it. 
Probably.
All you could really think about was the fact that you were definitely going to be telling Price that you didn’t want to do any more jobs in the Tundra. You enjoyed the cold climate when you weren’t working, which was almost never, but you still had a few days of leave a year where you got to fully relax (if your brain allowed). 
You liked the cold when you could cuddle up next to someone to stay warm, drink some hot cider, and watch stupid Christmas movies that had too many questionable moments that made you really sit and stare, trying to figure out whether or not you should laugh. 
You enjoyed the cold even more when you could hide away in the barracks, keeping warm with Price wrapped around you, hands tracing over your skin, heating you up quicker than a blanket ever could. 
“Frost.”
“Captain.”
He didn’t respond right away, making you wonder if he just wanted to say your callsign for the hell of it. 
“ETA?”
“Couple of minutes,” you answered. 
The eye with blood in it was starting to sting, the foreign liquid now slipping all the way to your jaw and dripping from your chin. 
“Cut it down to a minute.”
Price was starting to catch on that something was wrong. You were taking far too long to get to the safe house from where you had been coming from and your words were becoming too short and strained every time he asked you a question. Something was wrong and it was taking everything in him to not run out of the safehouse in search of you. You’d always been the type to be vocal when something went awry out in the field, so he silently prayed that your absence of issue meant that everything was fine and that you truly were just taking your sweet ass time to get to him. 
“You’re starting to sound like Gaz with all the worrying you’re doing, Pricey,” you teased, adding on the little nickname that you knew peeved him. 
“Shut it and get a damn move on.”
“Yessir.”
You started moving again just as he ordered you to do, finding some sense of motivation after hearing his gruff voice. It was the voice that had welcomed you to the 141 after Laswell had shipped you off to join the task force. The voice that had let you know that you were okay and safe when the boys had finally found you after you had been taken hostage on a mission in your earlier days. The voice that had talked you through every touch that made your body burn as he sunk his fingers into you. 
It was the kind of voice that you’d betray death for. 
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A little while later, the safehouse finally came into view. 
You glanced at your watch, checking how much time had passed. 
A minute and twenty-seven seconds.
Price wasn’t going to let you hear the end of it. 
You winced in pain, feeling the skin of your arm pull apart. The soldier that had cut you had grabbed the knife he used from the middle of another man’s chest and you were starting to feel queasy from the thought of your blood mixing with his. You needed to get your gash disinfected soon or you were going to have a problem. Well, technically you already had multiple problems, but you were trying to take on one issue at a time. 
Alright, maybe it was about time you mentioned something to your captain. 
“Hey, Cap’?” you probed as you quietly trudged toward the short porch steps of the cute little cottage. “Is this a bad time to mention that I got hit earlier?”
You failed to mention how badly you were hit.
“What the hell—what do you mean you got hit?”
You stopped a good ten feet from the steps, furrowing your brows. 
There was no sign of Price having entered through the front door. The powder in front of the stairs had been untouched and there weren’t any wet footprints  on the old wood of the porch. The windows were dark and nothing could be seen from the outside. The only thing that gave any sign of someone being inside was the dark smoke slowly wisping from the brick chimney peeking out of the top of the cabin.
“I mean, I got a nice little slugger in my side and some blood pouring out of me in other places,” you said, keeping your voice low and quiet. You wondered if you were in the right place. You looked down at your watch, checking your coordinates. According to the device, you were. “Are you inside?” 
He ignored your question. 
“Where the hell’s your kit?”
“Somewhere in the forest four klicks back.”
You looked around again, hoping to find some sign of this being the right place. 
“Christ, Frost,” Price muttered. You didn’t need to see him to know that he was shaking his head at you. “How far out are you?”
“Right out front,” you answered. 
You gave in. 
The wood creaked under the thick soles of your boots as you trekked up the stairs. You shoved the door open, stumbled inside, and slammed the door shut as you slumped against the wall. You slowly slid down to the floor. The cold began to set into your bones as the distinctive heat from the fireplace on your left radiated around you. 
Price rushed into the room. 
“Well, aren’t you a right-all mess,” he said as he moved toward you.
“Shut up,” you muttered, shaking your head before tilting it back to rest against the wall. You opened your good eye as he knelt down in front of you.
“Where are you broken, love?” he asked as his eyes scanned over you, clocking every little rip and tear in your gear before you could even say anything. 
He hated seeing you like this. 
It had become one of the toughest parts of his job ever since Laswell had sent you his way to recruit to the taskforce. There was just something about you that made his heart ache whenever he saw you in pain in any way.  
He knew that it was all a part of the job. 
That there were always going to be times where he saw you like this; busted and broken.
And he always fucking hated it.
He knew he’d hate it ever since the first time he had seen you like this. It was way back when you had first joined the team. You’d only been with them for a good six months, but you had already gone on about four missions with them. It had been a busy year for the task force, but you didn’t seem to mind. If anything, you were eager to keep getting back out on the field every time you got back to base. 
On their fifth mission all together, when they believed that they had the upper hand, you and Soap had been ambushed. The Scot had been knocked unconscious while you were taken captive, too many soldiers for the two of you to take out on your own without any supporting fire. 
Learning that you had been taken was worrisome on its own, but Price’s heart ached when they finally found you. 
He had sunken to his knees in front of you, using his knife to work away the zip ties that had you bound to an uncomfortable looking metal chair. Your face was bruised and bloody. Gashes from knife wounds worked their way down your arms and legs. Burn marks from what looked like cigarettes were ingrained into your plush skin. 
You looked beyond rough. 
Price had felt furious that he had let any of this happen to you, but the fury was quickly overcome with worry when you had perched your eyes open and groaned in pain. He let out a sigh of relief, finally knowing that you were, at the very least, well enough to be conscious. He had tried to soothe you as best he could and when you were finally free of your bounds, you practically fell into his embrace, your entire body slumping against his.
It was that very moment—when he wrapped his arms around you and held the entirety of you—that was when he knew that seeing you like this would always pull deadly wear on his heart. His old heart wouldn’t be able to take seeing you like this and hoped that it would be a rarity for his tiring eyes. 
Much to his surprise, it had been a rare sight. 
But that didn’t mean it was a non-existent sight. 
“Got shot in my right side, bullet’s still somewhere in there from what I can tell. Slash on my right arm from a gross ass knife that was already stuck in someone else before it got to me. And I got hit in the head and I can’t see out of my fucking right eye because of all the goddamn blood,” you explained, lifting one of your hands to try and wipe the blood away from your eye, but to no avail, the metallic liquid kept flowing. There was no use in trying to see right now anyway.
“Let’s get you fixed up then,” he said, a sense of urgency finally filling his voice. 
He had been attempting to keep his cool this entire time; to not panic so you wouldn’t panic either. But he knew that you were much too tired to even start panicking, so perhaps he was just trying to stay calm for his own sake. He found it funny that out of everyone on the task force, he had been the one to deal with more field injuries, yet here he was with his damned nerves buzzing out of his skull. 
Something like this shouldn’t have worried him as much as it did. 
But it was you. 
He couldn’t help himself when it came to you. 
Whatever was going on between the two of you had always left him in the realm of something being completely unspoken. The relationship that had sprouted was in some sort of limbo, but neither of you seemed to mind since it was easier that way. 
It was easier than having to tell the boys that something was going on between you two. It was easier than telling Laswell that there may be some sort of infringement on the team—not that she’d care unless it really started to affect how the two of you went about your work lives. And it was easier than admitting to each other that there might be something more than a quick casual stress-relief fuck. 
The two of you had shared too many moments together for that to be true. 
There were too many night’s of your bodies being pressed together and entwined, skin to skin to keep each other warm. Too many words of comfort as you soothe the nightmares of war away, finding comfort in each other’s arms. Too many gentle kisses for it to not be real. 
Your eyes were closed. 
He didn’t care much for that. 
“Frost,” he said, bumping your arm without a slash in it to jostle you awake. You opened your good eye and looked up at him, sending him a quick look of aggravation. It would’ve been amusing if you weren’t bleeding out before his very eyes. “Need your good eye open so I know you aren’t dying on me, sweetheart.”
You grunted in response, looking away from him but still keeping your eye open. 
The feeling of disquietude was starting to set in. 
It wasn’t normal for you to get hit during missions—it was actually quite rare. Soap was usually the one to take the podium for taking quite a bit of damage out in the field. Regardless of all that, you still knew what to do in such situations. You wouldn’t have been at this level of infantry if you didn’t know what to do. 
The hard part was the fact that you were in the presence of your captain. 
Moments ago, when you were trekking to the safehouse, you knew that you wouldn’t have to do any of this alone because your captain was waiting less than a klick away from you. 
The thought alone made everything feel easier. 
It was always harder doing it all alone. 
You thought back to the first and only time you had applied a tourniquet on yourself. Damn near gave up and bled out from how painful it was to cinch the band as tight as you could to keep yourself from bleeding out. You had spent years in the service of infantry. Years of wear and tear on the body, but that kind of pain was something you never wanted to feel again in your lifetime or in any lifetime. So when you felt your arm begin to fall numb from the lack of blood circulating through your veins, you knew that you had to get to Price before you would be forced to deal with it on your own. 
When he was around, you knew that you’d never have to face anything alone. 
You had learned to find such comfort in that. 
Price felt sick to his stomach as he started to get some of your heavier gear off. Your weapons were first to go, then your holsters, and then your vest. He was almost afraid to remove your thermal to see the damage the thick white jacket was hiding poorly. 
He couldn’t keep his damn head straight. 
Simon had griped with him about it a while back, saying that he needed to do better about keeping a clear head around you, but Price still managed to get work done on missions, so the younger man could never really get on him about it all that much. Simon didn’t know exactly what was going on between you two behind closed doors, but he had enough of an idea seeing how much Price doted on you even when you told him to fuck off and focus on something else for a while. 
It was the playfulness of your jabs that usually gave it away. 
That and the lingering looks you two sent each other as if you were some love sick teenagers. 
Price knew that you were more than capable of handling yourself in the field, but there was always something whispering in the back of his head that had him wearing a deep sense of worry on his sleeve every time he had to send you out on a mission. He had read your file when Laswell had recruited you. You were beyond skilled in almost everything you did and you rarely ever came back to base having to see a medic, so hearing that you had actually been hit—
“I can’t feel my arm.”
“Shite,” Price cursed, snapping out of his thoughts as he snatched his medkit and opened it up to finally help you. 
The cold had finally set in and all the blood that had seeped from your arm was causing your skin to turn pale. The gash on your arm was still wide open, but blood had stopped spilling from it, which meant he could disinfect it and get it closed without anything (hopefully) going wrong. Your side wasn’t doing all that bad, still bleeding, but not bad. He’d probably have to cauterize the wound just to feel like he could leave it be, but that could wait for after he got the bullet out of you. 
“Arm first, then your side,” he decided, nodding his head before he turned back to his kit. He turned back with a bottle in hand and you grimaced at the sight. “Gonna have to feel more broken before you feel fixed.”
“No shit,” you muttered, eyeing the small bottle of alcohol in his hand. “Sorry, I don’t mean to be snappy.”
Price set the bottle down, reached for his belt, and took it off. Something deep in you fluttered, but it stopped when he presented it to your face in a folded mess. 
“Bite down,” he said. You eyed him a little more, making him huff. “Bite down on it, Frost.”
You huffed back at him and bit down on the folded belt. You held it between clenched teeth, watching as he picked the bottle of alcohol back up. He sighed and nodded, almost as if he was telling himself that he was ready to do this. He tipped the bottle and poured the liquid over the wound. You squirmed and held back a writhing scream. He quickly clamped your legs between his knees, keeping you from squirming away. 
“I know, I know, sweetheart,” he said, trying to sooth you as he set the bottle down and wiped around the edge of the wound. He grabbed a needle and thread from his kit.
You groaned through the thickness of the belt as he stabbed the needle into your skin, creating even sutures along the wound. Your eyes closed as you tried to not focus on anything specific, but the feeling of Price keeping you in place while he dug a needle kept you from thinking of anything else. 
Price hated this. 
He hated every fucking part of this. 
Digging a needle and thread into your arm while you bit onto a belt. 
He thought back to the last time he had touched you. 
It was the night before the mission that you two were currently on. Price hadn’t expected to see you until the two of you were meant to take off on the tarmac, but he found himself aimlessly wandering the halls of the barracks until he wound up at the door of your private quarters. 
He almost hadn’t knocked. 
It was late, you two had to be up early, and he still didn’t know where the two of you stood when it came to something like this. 
He knew that there was some sort of love there, but he wasn’t too sure about the type. He knew that if he was stressed about all the ridiculous mission reports and papers he had to sign off on late into the night when he should be sleeping instead, you’d be sitting there with him to keep him company. He knew that if he mentioned that something was hurting, you’d use your nimble and calloused fingers to work away the knots and sore spots that came with all the training and missions. He knew that in a moment of weakness, he could count on you to hold the broken pieces of his soul together. 
Everything in his mind told him to leave you alone and let you be for the night, but the Captain was feeling selfish and he rarely ever got to indulge in such things.
His entire life and career, he was meant to be selfless. 
To put everyone else’s needs before his own. 
And ultimately, he had been okay with that… until he met you. 
He found himself tempted to be selfish when it came to you. 
He had knocked and you had answered. 
It was all he needed for the night. 
Maybe for life. 
“Done,” he said, tying off the last stitch and cutting the thread. 
“Thank fuck,” you breathed out, letting the belt drop from your mouth. 
“Still have a few more things to do,” he said, jerking his chin in the direction of your side before glancing at your head. “I’m gonna have to lay you down flat to get the bullet out, alright?”
“M’kay,” you muttered, still feeling hazy. Your nerves were buzzing in all the wrong ways and you just wanted it to stop. 
Price carried you over to the fireplace and laid you out on the floor next to the fire in hopes of warming you up. The flame felt nice against your freezing skin. He worked quickly to strip you of your thermal undershirt. The wound on your side looked small, but the skin around it was stained red with thick blood. 
“Want the belt again?” he asked. You sighed and nodded. He grabbed his belt and folded it up again before placing it back in your mouth. Your teeth dug into the material as you anticipated whatever pain was about to come. “Ready?”
You grunted in response. 
He used a set of dull tweezers to dig into your side, fishing for the little bullet deep in your flesh. You reeled in pain, damn near shooting up on your own, but Price used his free hand to push your chest back down to keep you steady.
“I know, pretty girl, I know,” he tried to soothe, continuing to search for the hunk of lead. You writhed in pain, pressing yourself against the floor as hard as you could as if that would help you escape the pain that was stabbing into it. The ends of the tweezers grazed something hard and he knew that he almost had it. “Almost got it. Almost done.”
After a few moments, he pulled the metal fragment from your body and pulled the tweezers from your aching flesh. You gasped, shaking as you laid limp. Your shoulders slumped against the wood floor as your chest heaved. Your heart was pounding in your chest as you tried to catch your breath. 
“You’re alright,” he said, squeezing your good arm as if that would make everything better. He massaged your bicep for a moment, using it as an excuse to keep his hands on you. He was also trying to calm you down a bit more before he had to move onto the actual hard part. He grimaced and glanced over to the fireplace. “Do you trust me?” 
“Mhm,” you hummed, lazily nodding your head as you felt consciousness slipping through your fingers. 
“I need you to close your eyes, sweetheart.”
“Mm-mm,” you said, shaking your head this time around. 
“I need you to trust me on this one, Frost.”
You stared at him for a long while before finally giving in and closing your eyes. You slammed the back of your head against the wood flooring as hard as you could, wishing that the impact had knocked you out because you knew that whatever he was about to do was going to hurt like hell. 
Price had always been the type to make sure that his own were safe and taken care of, but he was also the type to tell his own to buck up and take it. Whenever the boys got injured out in the field, he would always make sure that they were okay, and if they were, he’d tell the lot of them to get back to work then. 
Even with you. 
Every time you had been bruised and battered, if you told him that you were okay, he’d believe you and expect you to be okay and not broken. 
So the fact that he was telling you to close your eyes and to trust him meant that it had to be bad and that scared you.
Price waited for a few moments, making sure that you kept your eyes closed before he proceeded with what he was about to do. He grabbed the hot poker from the fireplace, the one that he had been stoking the fire with before you had made it to the confines of the safehouse and trudged in with all of your broken parts. He took a deep breath, knowing that there was a good chance that he was going to hate this just as much as you. 
“Bite down hard and keep your eyes closed, you hear?” he ordered, heaving one last warning before he pressed the burning poker to your skin. 
You did exactly as he ordered even though you were itching to scream and open your eyes to see what the fuck he was doing, but the smell of your burning flesh was enough to urge you to just squeeze your eyes shut even tighter. 
You were going to pass out. 
Or vomit. 
Or maybe scream at Price for cauterizing your wound without a proper fucking warning. 
Maybe all three. 
You eventually fell limp, no longer having the energy to resist the fiery pain that flooded over your skin. The only part of you that could move was your heaving chest as your lungs begged for some semblance of air. 
Price pulled the poker away, tossing the burning end back into the fire.
“You’re doing great, sweetheart,” he said, disinfecting the area around the cauterized wound to ensure that everything was thoroughly taken care of. He placed a bandage over it and then gently grasped your shoulders, his thumb massaging circles into your skin. “Gonna get you up now, nice and easy.” 
He slowly pulled you into an upright position, but you haphazardly slumped forward into his arms, forehead hitting his chest. He let your full weight fall against him. You still hadn’t said anything, nor had you opened your eyes. All you could really manage were hard, labored breaths that made your entire body quake. 
His heart hurt. 
Probably not as much as you were hurting, but still, it hurt. 
He couldn’t stand to see you like this. 
Body shaking in his arms, lungs gasping for air, kind eyes hidden behind low lids. 
He wanted to take you from this world. 
To take you from the world of hurt.
The world where you were constantly shot at and put at risk every time a new mission was assigned to the taskforce. 
But he knew that he’d never be able to take you from this world of chaos and pain. You’d surely raise hell the day you truly had to leave the force. You had always said that you’d probably die in the military. He really prayed that you wouldn’t. 
He pulled you into his lap, settling you down comfortably as he grabbed a clean wrap. He propped you up a little more so your head was resting against his shoulder, face tucked you into the crook of his neck. He wrapped your midsection, making sure to keep the bandages snug and clean. 
“Almost done,” he promised in a sweet coo. 
You opened your mouth, finally letting the belt drop to the floor. You hadn’t realized that it was still in your mouth. 
“Fuck,” you breathed out as he tied the bandages off, running his fingers over the material to make sure it all laid flat and clean. 
“Gonna lay you back down,” he said. 
You shook your head, pressing your forehead against his shoulder in hopes that he’d understand that you wanted to stay like that in his arms, face tucked away so he couldn’t see you cry. You just needed a moment to collect yourself. Tears pooled in your eyes, the pain setting in even more as the adrenaline started to wear off. He placed one of his hands on your back, gently rubbing circles over your shoulder blades in an attempt to calm you down.
“I’ve got you, Frost,” he muttered, pulling you in closer. Hot tears rushed faster from your eyes, slipping down, and staining his shirt as they dropped from your face. The diluted mix of salt water and blood didn’t bother him much. “Gotta check that head of yours. Clearly you’ve got a screw loose since you thought hiding all of this from me was okay.” 
“Didn’t want to bother,” you muttered hazily in broken fits.
“Helping you ain’t a bother, love,” he said, shaking his head. He slowly pulled you away from him and cupped your face in his rough hands. “How’s the head feeling?” 
“Amazing. Thanks for asking,” you said, letting the weight of your head sink into the salvation of his hands. He kept you up, calloused fingers running over your cheekbones to wipe away the stray tears still slipping from your eyes. The salty water had started to clear the blood from one of your eyes, but it wasn’t enough to fully see. You squeezed your eyes shut even more, leaning into him, and slumping in his hold. 
“Need you awake, soldier,” he said, jostling you around a bit. You opened your good eye, staring into his focused ones. 
There was so much comfort in his gaze. 
Solace. 
Made you feel warm. 
Too warm. 
Your eyes closed as you fell fully limp in his embrace. 
He scrambled to keep you in an upright position. 
“None of that now. Come on, Frost—”
God, you could die listening to that voice. 
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You woke with the scent of musk and cigar smoke lingering around you. 
It was a scent that you had grown accustomed to waking up to.
There was a sense of easement that fell over you whenever the scent lingered on your sheets whenever he found an excuse to stay the night in your private quarters back in the barracks. A scent that you found comfort in whenever you woke from a long flight after a rough mission. And a scent you had learned to completely love when you invited him to stay with you for Christmas when the entire task force inevitably left for their week long holiday leave. 
You attempted to take a deep breath to take the comforting scent in, but it was cut short when you felt your skin pull against the stitches in your side.
“You scared the shit out of me.”
You jolted from the sudden presence of the familiar gruff voice, but Price’s arms cinched around you tighter to keep you from falling from his lap and onto the floor. You were comfortably curled up in his lap, his arms around your body. His brows were furrowed, eyes riddled with stress and worry as he stared at you. 
It was the same look that he always gave when he felt like he failed someone. 
Disappointed them. 
“I’m sorry,” you muttered.
He stared at you for a little longer before pulling you in to hug you tight. You winced slightly, but were happy nonetheless to be close to the worried captain. You sighed and closed your eyes, letting your face rest in the nape of his neck. The smell of musk and thick cigars filled your system again. 
“You can’t scare me like that again, Frost. I don’t think my old heart could take another fright like that,” he said, shaking his head to nuzzle his face into yours. He took a deep breath, taking in the smell of your hair. Even with everything you’d been through, the light scent of your usual shampoo still lingered. “Plus the boys would kill me if I ever came back with you in pieces.”
“They’d live,” you muttered, even though you knew he was right. 
The boys of the 141 would probably wreak havoc if you ever came back from a mission on the brink of death. Though, they’d never blame Price. You knew that much for sure. They’d know that your captain would do anything and everything in his power to get you back in the best shape he could manage. 
You slowly pulled away from him, staying in his lap as you tried to reorientate yourself. You had been stripped down to your base layers, your other gear laid out near the fire to dry the blood and snow that had soaked into the material. He was also down to his base layers, his gear and his silly little hat in a pile on the other side of the room. 
The two of you were comfortably resting on the rundown couch closest to the fireplace, but the sight of the fire brought a memory back to you. 
“I can’t believe you fucking cauterized my wound you bastard—”
“Had to get it shut, sweetheart—”
“And a fire poker was your first and only thought?” 
He grimaced and sat back so he was pressed against the couch cushion. His hands stayed on you, one on your hip and the other on your thigh, fingers tracing gentle circles into your skin. 
“Stitches weren’t gonna cut it,” he said, shaking his head. 
You sighed, knowing he was right. 
“I want a cigarette,” you said, going to slide off his lap in hopes of finding a pack stashed somewhere in the pockets of your gear. He tightened his grip on you, pulling you back into him. 
“Wouldn’t do you any good to have one right now,” he said.
“I want one anyway.”
He sighed and shook his head before grabbing a cigar from the ashtray on the coffee table beside the couch. It wasn’t a cigarette, but it would do. You found it humorous that a safehouse had an ashtray, but knowing the people you worked with, it almost made sense. 
The end of the cigar was already burnt, meaning he had been smoking while you were out in his arms. He placed it in his mouth and grabbed the lighter, burning the end until he was able to take a decent drag. The breath of smoke was held deep in his chest before he slowly blew it out. He made sure to blow the smoke away from your face before holding the cigar out to you. You went to grab it, but he moved his hand just out of your reach. Furrowing your brows, your eyes flicked between him and the cigar. He slowly brought it back to you, but held it right up to your lips. It wasn’t until you wrapped your lips around it did he let it go and the weight of the cigar rested against your lip. 
You took a deep drag, holding it until you felt light headed. You leaned back, only stopping when his hand braced against your lower back to keep you from tipping over. You slowly blew out, letting the smoke wisp above your head. You passed the cigar back to him and he placed it back in his mouth, the tips of his teeth chewing the end a bit. 
It was a nervous habit of his. 
Typically had to swat his thigh to get him to quit. 
He took another drag. 
He tilted his head to the side to blow the smoke away from your face, but before he could, you gently grabbed his face and turned it back to face you. He furrowed his brows in a confused manner, but you slowly leaned forward and he got the idea.
God. 
He could die like this. 
You sitting in his lap, a cigar in hand, and you begging for something that he could only think to do with someone he loved. 
All he was missing was a glass of whiskey to top it all off. 
He cupped your face and urged you closer, but stopped before your lips could touch. You were tempted to lean forward and close the distance, but you stopped yourself. Your mouth was slightly ajar, wondering if he’d actually go through with it.
He did. 
He kissed you hard and blew the smoke right into your mouth. Heat filled your system as you slowly leaned back and exhaled, letting smoke wisp away between the two of you. 
“Fuckin’ minx,” he muttered before taking another drag with a smirk on his face. “Even on the brink of fucking death.”
“You love it,” you teased. He huffed out a gruff laugh. “I’m sorry for almost dying.”
“Don’t let it happen again,” he said. “Boys would kill me in a jealous rage if they found out you died in my lap like this.”
“As if,” you said, rolling your eyes. 
“You don’t see the way those boys look at you, love,” he said, shaking his head. 
“Yeah? And how about the way you look at me?” you wondered. 
His gaze met yours and you didn’t dare pull away. 
“Just like this,” he said, his lids low as his eyes flicked down to your lips and then back to your eyes. 
The fingers that had once been drawing circles into your skin had stopped, the pads of them pressing into your plush thighs instead. He had a good grip on you. You weren’t going anywhere. Not that you wanted to go anywhere. 
You could stay like this forever. 
“You gonna keep looking at me like that or are you gonna do something about it?” you asked, wondering how far he’d actually go while the two of you were on a mission. 
Then again, you two were technically done with the mission and you were just waiting for evac so… no harm, no foul. 
He let out a light laugh before bringing a hand up to your face and pulling you in until his lips pressed against yours. You leaned into him, your front pressed against his own. You moved your legs until you straddled him, wincing once from the pain in your side. He pulled back, pressing a hand down to where your wound was, looking over the bandaged area. 
“I’m alright,” you assured him. You cupped his face in your hands and slowly tilted it back up until he was looking at you again. “I’m alright, John.”
He kissed you again, resting his hands on your hips with a light squeeze.
“Evac won’t be here for another six hours,” you said, having caught a glance at the watch on his wrist. “Care to kill some time?” 
“Oh, I’d love to.”
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sgojoenthusiast · 11 months ago
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scary? my god, you’re divine.
✧.* satoru gojo x reader.
summary:
a curse invades your home but you’re saved by none other than satoru gojo - who takes your breath away in the most beautiful way.
cw: descriptions of violence, blood, injury, psychological trauma & distress, hospitals, reader is a non-sorcerer, like one like where the reader wants to die, talks about death, not exactly love at first sight but can be interpreted as such. honestly i’m so in love with gojo so this is just me projecting. fuck 261. this may be more of me indulging in my need to write horror lol
word count: 4.4k
likes, comments & reposts are deeply appreciated! <3 enjoy.
-`♡´-
The walls of your chest were closing in as your breathing gradually increased in its pace. One of your palms flew to your chest whilst the other searched for some sort of a grip on the wall beside you.
Stupidly, you had backed yourself into a corner, and now all you could do was feel the streams of tears cascade down your cheeks and land on your scrambling legs like waterfalls crashing down into the rocks below.
You tried everything you could for some sort of leverage. One hand scraped at the wall and the other at your heart whilst your legs pushed and pushed at the floor as if you could nudge yourself any further into the corner you were in.
Finding some rationality, you attempted to slow your breathing down, deciding that steady and stifled breaths would be better than attracting attention to yourself by making more noise. Though, there was nothing you could do about the sound of your heart beating erratically like it had more sense than you as it tried everything it could to escape.
At first, you had clawed your way through the halls of your home. Lights flickered, floorboards creaked, and you grunted and groaned as you fought your way through inescapable death. Yet, once you had realised every exit took you back to the entrance, and that you were in some sort of an endless maze within your own home, your mind sank into illogicality and you collapsed onto the floor as your legs gave in from fear.
It was the reverberating echo of several burly legs loitering outside the door that snapped some residue sense into your head and forced you to sit up.
There were tears staining your swollen face and it took every ounce of composure to bite your lip to muffle your cries. You wanted to scream. To wail and call for help. Yet you knew that would get you nowhere but trouble.
So for now, you hoped and prayed someone heard the sounds of slamming, glass shattering and your previous shouts and had the brilliant idea of calling the police.
But what would they do? You had seen that thing. It was horrifying. From the moment its wide, crooked smile appeared suddenly before you, a piece of you knew this would be the end. At first, you had thought you had finally gone insane. That some chord in your mind had snapped and now you had resorted to seeing things. However, when your back hit the wall across the room and you let out a shriek of agony, you knew that the monster before you was real, and so was the likelihood of certain death.
Your head suddenly raised at the splintering sound of wood snapping.
The unsettled beating of your heart ceased. The struggling of your limbs too. Each bone in your body abandoned life and shut down - refusing to move.
In front of you, the white frame of the door, decorated with faded and torn paint, had an oozing, inky smoke unfurling at a leisurely pace across the old frame, stopping shortly at the wall. In the space where the door used to conceal your existence, was one giant red eye that scanned across the entirety of the room before settling on its target - you. It blinked twice, before the door was ripped from its hinges and the wall had shrunk in size - replaced by a gigantic hole ripping through.
Soon enough the creature was crawling over to you, its legs widely shuffling across the room, scuttling closer and closer until one had slashed across your stomach, painting your top with a deep red. An agonised shout parted from your lips and your hand flew to the gash, yet you had no time to recover before another deformed limb was lifting you up against the wall by your neck.
Now, both of your hands coordinated an attack on the void-like limb, scratching and fighting at its hold around your throat in an attempt to get it off you. Your efforts were seemingly futile, however, evident by the way your vision was becoming a blur and each thought of freedom and survival was being crushed by the surface of its contorted leg.
You could only think thoughts of death, and how it wasn't coming soon enough.
Just when you thought it had ended, a radiating beam blinded your vision. The grip on your throat had been released, yet with both the ringing in your ears that muffled all other noise and the searing pain that tore through your entire body, you truly believed that you had already died. You fell to the floor once more and curled yourself up for whatever kind of familiar warmth you could acquire.
You shut your eyes tight, embracing the light they said would come to you in these final moments. But when nothing came, and the screaming wound lingered in your side, you delicately opened up one eye, moving your head slightly to look up.
There was no light. No God or unearthly being descending from above to take your hand and guide you to the afterlife. No, instead there was the back of a man. You couldn't see his face, but he was dressed from head to toe in a dark shade of blue like the hues of the night sky, and the more you stared, the more you believed you had been transported to a place you could only reach after death. However, when your eyes drifted upwards, they made out the sight of white strands of hair, and a slender hand reaching to the back of his head to undo the band of black that was wrapped firmly around it.
His hair fell down gracefully, as did one of his hands to his side, blindfold in tow, the opposite hand was raised to meet the height of his head. The sounds of his words were muffled, but you could make out an arrogant laugh and from the way the beast had halted all movements and instead opted for staring wide-eyed at the man standing in front of you, he had said something that injected fear through the monster's veins.
You could have sworn that you only closed your eyes for half a second. Yet, one blink later, and the monster's head had ceased to ever sit on its neck. The black fog that had clouded your senses and suffocated your lungs was dissipating, and there were remnants of its insides splattered on the walls and floor.
The white-haired man caught your fading gaze, and the moment his eyes connected with yours, you felt your heart slow and time stop.
His eyes.
They were angelic. Perhaps you were dead because there was nothing so heavenly like the shades of the sky in his eyes on Earth. There was nothing so remarkable, so flawless. You didn't want to blink, not even as your eyes watered and started to sting. Yet the frailty of your exhausted body refused to let you have this one thing, and so you broke the connection temporarily only to rebuild it back up again.
He began to make his way back over to you, yet you struggled to find the strength to move in order to meet him halfway. You couldn't even find the strength to move your aching body off the floor or your bruised hand of your throbbing wound. Still, with a pained wince you moved to a more comfortable position in between being flat on your back and straight on your arm.
You looked up at him from your tilted position and he kneeled down beside you. "You alright? Can you walk?"
You shook your head as best as you could, he simply stared down at you with a confusing look sparkling in the depth of his eyes - the ones you couldn't look away from.
"That's okay, sweetheart. Help is coming." He smiled at you.
Gojo was puzzled by the look on your face. For some reason, you hadn't stopped staring at him since he turned around. He assumed that perhaps it had something to do with the curse. Was it a response to the trauma you had endured? Had it cursed you? Was it him that you were afraid of? He certainly hoped not. From the moment he saw your face, albeit not in particularly amazing conditions considering you were being strangled and were halfway to death's doorstep, he felt a tingling sensation in his stomach and a pulling in his heart.
There was something about you, there had to have been for you to illicit such a reaction from every part of him within seconds of your meeting. Fuck, he prayed that he hadn't frightened you off.
"I hope I didn't scare you." He said softly, yet laughed humourlessly in a way for him to play it cool and demonstrate how you had nothing to be afraid of. With as much care and delicacy as he could muster, one hand went underneath your head, gently trying to lift you up as his other hand reached for your waist.
You looked at him with furrowed brows, as though the implications of him scaring you were nothing short of laughable. Though, as you read the thoughts behind his eyes, you could tell there was a hint of genuine concern laced within them.
This stranger, who you had never met before, felt concerned for you and had saved your life. Yet, he was anxious that he had scared you? It was a ridiculous insinuation.
"Scared me? No, it's just, that you're beautiful." Your voice was growing weaker, and just in time, you heard the sounds of more footsteps growing closer and closer. Yet your eyes focused on the way his eyes widened before he smiled, just as genuine as his concern.
"Oh yeah?" He provoked. "No need to fall for me this quickly, sweetheart. Plenty of time for that."
Ordinarily, if someone had been so bold as to suggest something like that, you would have scoffed in their face and walked away. Yet the deeper meaning of comfort he was trying to provide you with, the one that showed you that you weren't dying anytime soon, was all you needed to laugh and reply coarsely with, "We'll see about that."
The last thing you heard as you dozed off peacefully was the sound of his laugh and the feeling of his touch passing you onto someone else's.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
There was an overwhelming light above you, one that was strong enough to pierce through your eyes despite the fact they were shut tightly. The light surrounding you felt like a thousand blinding suns beaming down at you from above as though you were encased in a circle of light that was urging you awake. You groaned softly, shuffling your head to the side in an attempt to bury it in the pillow and escape from the natural, ringing alarms of the light.
A pillow? Had you been dreaming? All it took was for you to try shifting onto your side to alert you that, no, you hadn't been dreaming. You winced painfully as the realisation slapped you across the face. Everything was real. The fight, the struggle, the... the monster. A trail of goosebumps washed over your body and you screwed your eyes shut like doing so would erase the memories of what had happened.
However, once you realised that he was also real, your eyes softened and in all the darkness of what you had experienced that day, the idea that the man who had saved your life was really out there, and that monster wasn't. That realisation alone was enough to wash a sense of tranquillity and closure over you.
"I wouldn't try to move if I was you." A female voice rang out - one you didn't recognise. You had already assumed that you were in a hospital, so the unfamiliarity didn't scare or panic you. Simply, your eyes slowly opened to the sight of a brunette woman in a doctor's coat, and your suspicions had been confirmed. You wondered if she knew anything of what happened.
It dawned on you that perhaps, your situation wasn't original. The man that had saved you seemed to be experienced and knew what he was doing. However, surely you would've heard if there was a mass of monsters plaguing the Earth that you lived on.
"What happened?" You questioned tentatively, voice weak and dry. Although you could practically recall the events with no missing details, you wanted to know more about the thing that had attacked you and you hoped that the doctor would have some sort of a clue if she was the one treating you. She handed you a cup of water which you accepted eagerly, reaching your hands out and thanking her quickly before you immediately went to relinquish yourself of the dry throat that had been scratching and tormenting you since you had woken up.
You saw a pass clipped to her coat as a form of identification. The name on the pass flashed across your eyes as 'Shoko', to which you took a note of before quickly returning your gaze back to hers.
"You were attacked by a curse - and no I won't. explain what that is. You can ask Gojo." She was wandering around the room slowly, head down as she wrote down a few things. Occasionally, she would you a question in regards to your health. Her voice lowered to a tone barely above a whisper. "Sure he'd love to answer considering he's been not-so-subtly asking about you non-stop."
"What was that, sorry?" You asked sincerely, placing the cup down on the bedside table. Looking up at her, you could tell she had a tired look adorning her features, however, there was a slight smirk playing on her lips as well.
You thought more about her words. Gojo. Who was that? A curse? What does that even mean? Not long ago, you were oblivious to all of this, unaware that such creatures were roaming around.
Shoko waved a dismissive hand in your direction. "Nothing. Anyway, I'm only here to make sure that the curse left no lingering side effects that would need treatment. Luckily for you, you're in the clear. So when you're all healed up, you're a free woman."
'Free wasn't necessarily how you would describe it. You recall parts of your house being smashed up by the monster - or, curse, as Shoko had labelled it.
You had so many questions. Some in regards to the curse, others more personal and unanswerable that pertained to your future. You had no idea what you'd do once you left, and that scared you.
Shoko began to place her things into her bag, taking out a cigarette in the process and placing it between her lips as she held the lighter to her side ready for when she left.
"How long have I been here?"
She looked up at you from where she was focused packing her things. "A little under a week. You're very lucky Gojo had saved you when he did. Or else, you probably wouldn't be here."
So that's who Gojo was. You perked up a little at the mention of the man who had saved you. Even if it was just once, you wanted to see him. To thank him, at the very least. "You, uh...You mentioned something about me asking him about the curse. Does that mean he'll stop by?"
You looked down, fiddling with the sheet covering your injured body, wanting to avoid her questioning gaze that most certainly had a knowing glint in it.
She merely let out a small laugh and shook her head in something similar to disbelief. "Probably. Although, he doesn't usually find himself checking up on the people he saved." Picking up her bag, she reached for the door handle. "I've gotta head out. Feel better soon, okay?"
You thanked her once again, giving her a small wave as she headed out the door.
Truthfully, you didn't know whether or not to be discouraged by her words. On one hand, she had told you that he'd probably stop by. On the other, she mentioned that he doesn't usually. Deciding not to dwell on it too much, you closed your eyes once more as another nurse walked in to take the place of Shoko, beginning to do more check-ups.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
About a week had passed by when you were finally discharged from the hospital. During that time, your close friends and family had all come to check on you. Your best friend and co-worker had offered you her spare room whilst your house was having repairs done to it. It was a nice arrangement, considering the two of you owned a bakery together so that on the days you were feeling better you had someone who could take you down. You didn't actually start working again until about a month after you had been discharged and your injuries were mostly healed up.
There was only one thing missing. Gojo had never stopped by like the doctor had told you he might, which left you with a feeling of disappointment. You tried not to let it bother you too much, but it was difficult knowing you had never been able to thank him. Another man had stopped by, however. You assumed he had some sort of a connection to Gojo and Shoko, given that he had only stopped by to ask you to sign a form that would prevent you from being able to tell anyone about what had happened. He came very shortly after Shoko, meaning you had to lie to your friends and family by telling them it was another person who had broken into your home. You signed it anyway after he assured you it was for their safety and for the safety of others.
Now, a little over a month later, you were doing a lot better. You struggled to even close your eyes at night, sometimes, and often couldn't walk through the streets on your own. But other than that, your injuries had healed, you were far less paranoid than you were a month ago and your home was close to being ready.
You were sat at the counter of the bakery you shared with your best friend, scrolling mindlessly through your phone. It was quiet, today, only a few people wandering in and ordering something to go - with it being a Monday and all.
Unexpectedly, you heard the bell ring as the door opened. Immediately, you stood up and tucked your phone into your pocket, rushing to greet the customer. However, upon looking up to see the person who walked in, you stopped suddenly in your tracks. You blinked, yet he was still there.
You thought about him so often, your mind wandering whenever you were left alone with your thoughts for too long. You thought about the way his hair crashed across his features like waves when he took off his blindfold. You thought about how he turned to look at you with those eyes locked on yours. Those eyes - so entrancing. It was as though he had bewitched you and put you under a spell the moment he looked at you because you were so enamoured by him that you didn't dare to blink. You thought about how it was apparent that he never seemed to think about you - and that made you want to reach over the counter and slap him a little. Although, especially after he saved your life, what did he owe you? Absolutely nothing. So instead, you simply watched him walk over to you with a small smile on his face.
His coat was covered in snow from the outside rampage of white whisps and cold air. Though it wasn't incredibly obvious that there wasn't any, he shook his head slightly and a few remaining flakes of snow fell from the frozen tips of his hair. Although it was winter now, he sported a pair of sunglasses - to which you assumed it was for a reason related to why he was wearing that blindfold.
For the past month, you couldn't help but wonder whether or not his angelic presence was the result of your delirious and pain-stricken state. However, upon observing him now, you determined that he really was captivating in every way. And something was telling you that he was looking at you with the same impression, although you pushed the thought away, dismissing it as foolish hope.
You had no idea what to say to him. You had been waiting for this moment for so long, yet you never thought about what you might say. Thankfully, he decided to speak up first as he peaked over the edge of his glasses at you.
"I've been looking for you." He started, his voice seemingly breathless like he'd run a mile just to get here to you - like he was tired of looking, but his work had finally paid off. "I'm sorry I didn't come sooner - when you've got a job like mine it's-"
"Thank you." You interrupted. The mention of his job had smacked some sense into you as you were reminded of what he had done for you. He looked slightly taken aback. It wasn't something he heard often, but when he did it was as though he was reminded why he did this in the first place - let alone hearing it from you. The girl he hadn't been able to shake out of his head since the moment he saw her, the one he yearned to see just one more time because she looked at him like she understood him and that was all he could ever ask for. "Can I get you something?"
Gojo smiled at that, taking you up on your offer as you grabbed him his order (on the house, of course) and finally sat down with the one you had wanted nothing more than to just sit and talk with - and you did. The two of you talked for hours, occasionally interrupted by a customer or two. You thanked him profusely to the point where he threatened to leave jokingly if you thanked him again. He explained everything to you and answered all of your silent questions for you that you had to keep close to your chest for the past month. Yet, most importantly, you talked about each other. And the more you talked, the more your heart raced and heat rushed over your entire body.
The all-powerful Satoru Gojo never expected to find himself so infatuated by somebody, yet when he saved you that day, there was an inexplicable fire that was lit from within him. He'd never seen anybody so beautiful, and he had never been recognised by anything other than he strength during moments like that. When you had complimented him, he knew from within that it wasn't solely his physical characteristics you appreciated, but also the person he was inside. He felt as though you saw inside of him just from that short interaction.
As you spoke, Gojo found himself digging around with both hands trying to find that smile you kept flashing him and when you did, he didn't so much as blink because it was so bewitching. And likewise, whenever he laughed at something you said, you couldn't prevent the satisfied smile that rested on your cheeks from the prideful feeling overtaking your mind.
Your hand wrapped around your mug, savouring the delightful warmth that radiated from it in contrast to the biting cold that howled away outside the building. The two of you were sat in a corner opposite each other, and as more time passed, the more your cheeks began to ache from your constant smile and laughter and the more you dreaded to get up when a customer walked through.
"I swear! I'm a busy man okay. I was out of town when you woke up." He sulked, his head resting on his hand with a pleading look in his eyes. You laughed at his effort of reason.
"And the month following, you were..." You prompted with a humourous tone laced into your words.
Before he could answer, his hand slipped forward slightly, grazing yours and sending shockwaves throughout your entire arm and body. Avoiding his stare, you turned away, unable to conceal your smile and the way he had your breathing speed up every second he spoke to you and touched your hand like he was. At this, he pouted, leaning to the side in an attempt to catch your eyes yet you turned even more with a laugh.
Sighing, he answered your previous question. "Shoko says I was nervous. I would argue that I was simply building tension for the plot."
You snorted at his absurdity, moving your hand back to take a sip of your drink. He sagged a bit in disappointment at your actions, yet when you placed your drink back and had your hand brushing against his just the same as before, he livened up a bit and grinned at you once more. You delighted in the way he looked at you over his glasses and smiled. It had been a while since you felt a connection like the one between the two of you, yet you had never experienced it so quickly. It was all-consuming and had you on the edge of your seat in anticipation as to what he woud say and do next.
Soon enough, the day had reached its end - and if it weren't for the sun barely peaking out over the window to the bakery, you wouldn't have believed that you had practically spent the day with Gojo with it feeling like just an hour since he first walked in. Though the amount of hours you had shared with him said differently, you felt like you hadn't seen enough of him.
After he put his coat back on, he turned to face you with a smile playing on his lips. "So... I'll pick you up at seven tomorrow night?"
You swore that if he hadn't invited you out to dinner when he had, you would've dragged him out later that night handcuffed.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
a/n: if it wasn't entirely obvious i got a bit lazy towards the end (major character flaw of mine). i am an absolute SLUT for the non-sorcerer x sorcerer trope tho.
☾ ⋆*・゚:⋆*・゚sgojoenthusiast
715 notes · View notes
meelusinee · 5 months ago
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HOME IS A QUESTION MARK | C.W X READER
word count \ 2.8k | christmas fluff | slash / charlie weasley x reader
in which you find yourself at home dating charlie weasley author's note at the end!
FICMAS MASTERLIST
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HOME IS A QUESTION MARK | CHARLIE WEASLEY X READER
You have been through many homes in your life.
Your mother had birthed you inside a home made to be warm and safe. You could tell whenever you walked through it as a young kid, feeling the warmth of love inside the woodwork of the door frames. Though that didn’t last long, your grandparents taking you out once she married a monster of a man.
Then there was the issue of your grandparents. Your grandmother was quick to blame you for all of your mother’s problems, and your grandfather was too much of a coward to stop it. The police officer who came to get you after a welfare call took you in for a week or two, which forced you to live with kids who were absolute menaces.
All of that faded once you were in foster care though. Anything horrid that you ever imagined in your nightmares seemed to be your reality now, a mix between constant anxiety and lack of energy to care running through you like the oxygen you needed to breathe.
Suffice to say, you never truly felt at home. No amount of porridge or pumpkin juice from Hogwarts could make you feel safe, nor any amount of butterbeer surfing itself down your throat.
Nothing ever felt like home.
Nothing felt like home until you met him.
You had been friends with the Weasley twins for a long while, having been adopted into their schemes ever since you stepped foot onto the platform of Hogwarts. They seemed to like you enough to keep you around without hurting you, and that was all you could ask for in the beginning.
Percy seemed a bit annoying to them, but you didn’t mind him that much. Ron and Ginny came after, along with Hermione and Harry. You and Harry seemed to bond well over your trauma, though you never truly knew with people.
Even with that in mind, it wasn’t perfect. The twins had a knack for the dangerous kind of trouble, and their younger siblings and their friends had a knack for the deadly kind. Fred and George’s pranks sometimes went too far, and there were times you debated ending the friendship because of that. You put in effort to communicate the issues with them, even if you regretted it internally sometimes.
But right now? Right now you were very glad that you had put in the effort.
“Charlie.” he had said, that smile flashing you like a blinding paparazzi light you had been wanting on you your whole life.
His eyes were warm, and his piercing along with other things helped his charm. He had a couple of scars across his arms and face, mainly burn marks. That and the freckles, his arms covered in those and lean muscles.
“Y/N.” you whispered, smiling softly at him. Your stomach felt like it was twisting itself into a cruel knot worthy of its place in books devoted to forms of olden time torture.
“So you’re the famous twin wrangler?” he asked, chuckling softly as he leaned forward. He knew you? That was a shock in it of itself, as was his new standing position.
“Twin wrangler?” you asked.
“You know, Fred and George,” he said, waving his hand. “I’ve heard that you’ve given ‘em one of many different lectures as of late.”
“Oh,” you said, smiling softly at his words. You weren’t sure who told him about you, but if you had to assume, it’d probably be either Ginny or Ron. “I suppose so, yes.”
“You’re rather adorable,” he muttered, tilting his head slightly to look at you. “Ron didn’t do me any justice explaining you.”
“No?” you asked, a small flush covering your cheeks.
Charlie smiled at you, his eyes looking you up and down with a small smile. “Yeah, not the tiniest bit.”
“Oh,” you breathed out, smiling dopily at him.
“I think you look pretty, Y/N.” he said slowly, and you noticed how his voice dropped a bit as he talked to you. “I think you look really pretty.”
You smiled at that, the flush on your cheeks spreading all across your face. You weren’t sure if he would notice it or not, though you definitely did with how hot your face felt. “Thank you.”
“It’s a basic fact of the world, I don’t need to be thanked.” he hummed, chuckling softly. “The dragons can sometimes breathe fire, Wizards can do magic, and you are absolutely beautiful. If it weren’t for the fact you were dating someone, I would probably ask you to be my wife.”
Your smile brightened a bit more at his first sentences, though his last one made your eyebrows furrow rather quickly. “Dating someone?”
“Fred said that you had a boyfriend?” Charlie said, his eyebrows furrowing back. “No, I don’t.” you muttered, looking at where Fred was standing. It was their grand opening night for their shop in Hogsmeade, and their family had dragged them both out to celebrate at the Three Broomsticks. That, by association, led to you being dragged and sat in the corner. “I’m not sure why he said that.”
“Maybe he knew I’d try to flirt with you if I thought you were single.” Charlie said, tapping his now empty glass of butterbeer. “Do you want another drink?”
“Oh,” you muttered, looking down at the glass you had practically downed when you got it. “Yeah, another one would be nice.”
“Maybe a date afterwards?” he asked hopefully, a sparkle in his eyes you’d never really seen in a man before.
You blinked in confusion at the sight of it, not sure what to think. On one hand, you weren’t sure whether you could trust him. You already felt like you were betraying yourself by being attracted to someone in the first place, and you felt yourself questioning whether he was even a good guy based on your previous types of men. But there just seemed something about him that you couldn’t ignore.
You supposed that you would find out later if you’d regret that.
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“I’m glad that you said yes.” Charlie whispered, his voice calm as he spoke to you.
You were both in a small patch of grass, laying down on your backs as you looked at the moon and the stars. The past three dates that you had with him were absolutely perfect. Charlie asked about your interests, didn’t talk over you, and was a generally respectful guy. He brought you flowers on the second date after you mentioned what your favorite ones were. You later found out that he kept one of them to make sure he knew when yours were dying, in which case he sent you another bouquet with a different type.
Overall, he seemed like a really, genuinely, good guy.
“Yes to what?” you asked, looking over at him. Your face flushed again as you realized he’d been looking at you the entire night, a small smile appearing on both of your faces. “What?”
“The first date.” he whispered, chuckling as he turned on his side completely to face you. “You said yes to go out with me. I think asking you was the best decision I’d ever made.”
“I don’t think you mean that.” you chuckled, though both of you knew that it was dull.
“Why wouldn’t I?” he asked, gently tilting your head back to face him. His eyebrows furrowed as he looked into your eyes, and for a moment, you felt like he was looking directly into your soul. “Is there something you want to tell me?”
“I don’t,” you mumbled, before sighing. You knew it would come up sooner or later if this went any further. And as much as you wanted to keep him and cherish what you thought was the perfect guy for as long as you could, you also felt guilty for trapping him into something with someone he might think as normal. “I’m not normal.”
“Nobody’s normal.” he hummed gently. “But that just,”
“No, Charlie.” you said, sitting up. You cleared your throat as you watched him sit up with you, trying your best to speak. “I had a really bad life so far. My, my mom had this really bad boyfriend, and my grandma was really religious. Like, dangerously. And all the foster homes and bad friendships I’ve had, and everything is just,”
“Y.N.” he said, hand holding yours again. “You had a bad childhood. I’m assuming really bad by the amount of people you threw around, but that doesn’t mean anything.” he whispered. “And it certainly doesn’t mean you have to spill on the third date, okay?”
“You,” you mumbled, unsure of what else to say. Could he get any more perfect?
“Yes, me.” he smiled softly. “If you really want to tell me, then you can. I’m not saying you can’t. But I don’t want you to feel like you need to just because you’re interested in me. That’ll come with time, we can learn together.”
“You’re perfect.” you whispered softly, sniffling.
“Let’s not go that far.” he smiled, pulling you in a hug to try and prevent your tears.
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“Charlie?” Fred asked, walking up behind you dramatically. “Really, Y/N?”
“What?” you asked confusedly, not sure what he meant. You hadn’t even caught the first word that he said.
“Charlie!” George said, popping up on your other side. “You’re going out with our brother!”
Your face made an ‘o’ shape before you nodded, not sure what they were going to say next. In all honesty though, you didn’t care.
Charlie had asked you out about two months ago, after around three months of seeing each other. You originally asked whether he wanted to date you after your fourth date, to which he quickly stated that he wanted to earn your hand in dating. That alone would’ve been enough to make you say yes, much less the next three months after.
And although you’ve had your mishaps, he’s still listened and learned. He was a genuinely good guy, one which sometimes made you doubt or reconsider everything about yourself. Even still, he reassured you whenever that happened, and made sure to communicate with you as well.
“What about me and Charlie?” you asked, your eyebrows furrowed. You weren’t sure what they were going to say, but you knew that you were ready to defend it with your life.
“We mean that if he tries to do something, then mum will get mad at us for beating him up!” Fred complained, George throwing his hands in the air. “You’ve kept us out of trouble one too many times, now you’re setting us up for it!”
“Well, I don’t think you’d have to worry about that.” you mumbled. “Charlie’s a good guy.”
“Good guy?” Fred said, shaking his head at that. George shook his head too, hands wrapping you up in a hug. “You’ll think that until he starts pranking you when you move in together.”
“Maybe he only pranked you two out of retaliation.” you suggested, chuckling softly at them both.
George gasped at that, looking over at Fred. “You’re right!”
“We should prank him back!” Fred said.
“How about we don’t?” you suggested, chuckling as they both deflated like dying balloons.
“Well, on the plus side,” Fred said, his eyebrows wiggling much like a worm trying to crawl out of the dirt. “When you two get married, you’ll officially be our sister!”
“I don’t think Ginny’ll be too happy you’re replacing her.” you said.
“It’s not a replacement, it’s an upgrade!” George joked, smiling as Fred clapped along to that thought. Both of them quickly hushed though as a pillow was thrown their way, Ginny running them both out of the room with her wand in hand.
“The nerve of those two.” she muttered, rolling her eyes as she faced you. “Can you believe them?”
“I’ve dealt with it for about seven years.” you sighed, shaking your head as you looked down to the ground. “I deserve compensation.”
“Don’t we both?” she chuckled, bumping you with her arm. “In all seriousness though, I’d like to have you as my sister.”
“Really?” you asked, smiling softly at her.
“Really!” she said before chuckling. “I mean, I’m sure Harry would too. Ron said that he’s planning on proposing sometime soon, and he’s always viewed you as a sister. Plus, you’re probably the best sisterI’ve ever had myself, and you’re not even my real sister! I mean, there’s only so much that my brothers really do, and I rarely feel comfortable talking to mum about my issues.”
“You don’t?” you asked, not sure whether that was a cause for concern or not.
“She’s just,” Ginny muttered, shrugging. “Old. I don’t know if that’s a mean thing to say, but it’s true! Like a culture shock kind of thing?”
“I get it.” you smiled, nodding at her words.
“Yeah.” she smiled, before patting your shoulder. “Make sure to take care of Charlie too. Those dragons really do a number on him, I’ll tell you!”
You nodded, before swallowing another sip of your drink. Ginny walked off after that, sitting down on the couch with Harry and Hermione. You were still stuck in the corner, as usual, though a part of you felt more willing to get out than before.
Maybe Charlie really was changing you.
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“Do you want to deal with my family for Christmas?”
Charlie and you had moved into a small flat together recently, and the days had been complete bliss. The only thing that really separated you was work, though you always managed to find a way back into each other's arms again.
“Why wouldn’t I?” you asked him.
“They’re loud.” he shrugged back, placing the letter that his mother had sent him down in front of you. She had sent you one separate, since only the twins, Ginny, and Harry knew you were dating him. “Plus, mum is really touchy.”
“I’ve dealt with it for years.” you shrugged simply. The twins had always invited you over for Christmas every year, and she was just as physically loving as one could get.
“Doesn’t mean you have to.” he reminded you, his face just as gentle as ever.
You looked up at him with a small but grateful smile, feeling a part of yourself healing with every time you two talked or touched. “I know.”
“So you’d want to?” he asked, taking a small bite of his yogurt. “I can buy you those noise cancelling headphones as a gag gift, you pretend to put them on. Or just some charmed earplugs that only zone in on someone talking to you.”
“I think those earplugs sound nice.” you smiled, leaning forward a bit as you looked at him with all the heart eyes you could ever muster.
“Perfect, earplugs it is!” he smiled brightly, standing up a bit straighter once he finished his yogurt.
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Christmas at the Weasleys was always a loud event. Everyone was busy hauling packages left and right, the tree absolutely stoked to the brim. Mrs. Weasley was the loudest of them all, the seasonal stress making her absolutely panic over everything that she could.
Even with the earplugs that Charlie had made for you, you still eventually found yourself sitting on the back porch. Everyone had been enthralled in dinner, enjoying the meal as you expertly sneaked off to get some fresh air. The scents and the sounds were always overstimulating, just as much as the constant rubbing against your skin from ugly sweaters and sweaty bodies.
You probably shouldn’t have expected to stay out there for long though, you realized, since Charlie seemed to always notice whenever you went away.
“You okay?” he asked, sitting down on the porch step next to you.
“Just too much.” you mumbled, resting your head on his shoulder.
“That’s okay.” he whispered, wrapping his arm around you. You nuzzled into his grasp closer, feeling comforted by any form of contact you could muster. “You wanna go home?”
“I don’t know.” you whispered, rubbing your hands together.
“That’s okay.” he repeated, kissing your forehead. “You ate something at least, right?”
“Mhm.” you nodded. “Made sure of it.”
“Good.” he said, his hand caressing your waist.
You both sat in silence for a while, his arm resting around your body as your head leaned itself onto his shoulder. Even with the freezing cold weather outside, you still felt rather warm yourself. Your eyes closed themselves as you both nuzzled closer, the moon rising higher in the sky the longer that you both sat outside.
It was then that you truly knew what Charlie meant to you.
Not only was he your boyfriend, the love of your life that you never knew you would even find on the Earth that you once hated, but he was also home. He was the lifeline you found yourself always able to rely on, just as you were his. Being with him felt safe and loving, a home that you had been missing out on for years.
And while you were sad you didn’t have it before, you were certainly glad you had it now.
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AUTHOR'S NOTE
HELLOOOOO EVERYONE thank u guys so much for reading this, it's a lot longer than my usual fics but i just felt that it felt a little unfinished you know? i might maybe do a second part where molly finds out about y/n and charlie, who knows?
AS ALWAYS, please like, comment, reblog, and all that jazz! i thank everyone who does VERY dearly, very very dearly even. HAVE A GOOD DAY LOVELIES BYEEEEEE
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084thoughts · 2 months ago
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Ravi Centric Fic Recs!!
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Separated into categories and listed by word count from least to greatest. AO3 ratings are highlighted -> Gen Teen Mature Explicit Not Rated (NR)
🔥 labeled fics are some of my personal favorites!!
Please read tags/descriptions before to avoid any triggering or explicit content. Many of these fics discuss childhood cancer, chronic and mental illness, explicit sexual activity, and/or traumatic injury.
Basically all of the romantic/sexual pairings w Ravi are rarepairs-Hanikkar, May/Ravi, Buck/Ravi- (because 9-1-1 can't seem to bother giving him character development) so if you don't vibe w a ship, just don't read it. I included some great non-slash fics, and a entire section for Buddie-centric fics.
Character Study (Ravi Lore) 📚
Tea by ThirteenRedVampireBites | NR | 1.2k | Tea and how it shaped Ravi's favorite memories, Comfort Food, Fluff, minor hanikkar Ravi Begins by Ginja828 | T | 4.5k | Post-Season 7, 911 Typical Emergency, Flashbacks, Suicide Attempt, Queer Ravi no one can be born too many times by Daisies_and_Briars | T | 10k | Ravi's brother visits the station and is a dick, discussion of cancer, autism, supportive 118 Ravi Begins by mothdean | G | 11k | Ravi joins A-shift, Minor Character Death (on a call), Cancer Treatment & Remission, Hurt/Comfort, Childhood Trauma 🔥darlin', i'm just tryin' to tell ya by archerincombat | T | 12k | The 118 adopts a stray dog that reminds Ravi of his childhood, Cancer, Fire Station Dog, Panikkar Family, 118 Found Family 🔥the ravi fic by archerincombat | T | 15k | Ravi/OMC, 118 Friendships, Panikkar Family, Ravi's OC Friends, Childhood Cancer, Pining, Canon 911 Events: Seasons 4-6 paralyzed (don't you know you've got me?) by doveious | T | 36k | Ravi is paralyzed after a car accident, Established May/Ravi (but not main focus), Hurt/Comfort, Physical Disability, Chronic Pain
118 Friendships 🚒
if i should fall by truth_seeker_1789 | G | <1k | 911 call, Landslide Rescue, Whump, Ravi & Buck Friendship burn the sage (clear the air ducts) by doveious | G | 1.4k | Ravi gets stuck in an air vent, Crack, 118 hijinks Who you gonna call? by scarmaddiewrites | G | 1.7k | Buck has Chronic Pain, Buck & Ravi Friendship, Eddie is in Texas an open wound by rarakiplin (gmontys) | T | 2k | Ravi sees Eddie in the parking lot of the bar, Season 5b, Angst, Mental Health Struggles nothing but the ocean and the sunrise by evenatraitormaymend | G | 2.3k | Buck tells Ravi about his leg scars at the beach, Established Buddie, Fluff, truck bombing Ravi Versus El Paso: A Hate Story by serenelystrange | G | 2.7k | Snippets of Ravi and 118 during Eddie's banishment in Texas, Good-Natured Bullying, 118 Friendships, Queer Ravi birds of a feather, we should stick together by regvlvs | G | 3k | Hen takes Ravi to an aquarium trip to help him study for his paramedic exam, Autistic Ravi, Fluff, Hen & Ravi Friendship things aren't always as they seem by swordgay1989 | G | 4k | 5 times Ravi felt unsure at the 118 + 1 time he felt at home with them, Hurt/Comfort, Autistic Ravi, Cancer, Panic Attacks, Angst it's not what it looks like by odysseus_calls | G | 4.1k | Ravi's romantic plans fall through, he ends up spending his day out with Buck instead, minor Hanikkar, cute date activities with your crush's brother-in-law 🔥all we see is sky for forever by strawberryspence | T | 9k | Buck and Ravi get injured on a call together, Hurt/Comfort, Cancer, Buck & Ravi Friendship 🔥flood of facts by cookiesandcream | T | 9.5k | Buck and Ravi bond at the zoo, background buddie and hanikkar, infodumping, fluff
Cancer 🏥
All About the Cancer by Acciopologies | G | 1k | Chronic Illness, Vomiting, Angst, Misunderstandings Treading on Eggshells by Acciopologies | G | 1k | Childhood Trauma, Mention of Overdose, Suicide Attempt, Whump, Mother-Son Relationship Instead of soccer games by Beeisforever | G | 1.2k | Ravi meets a kid on a call that reminds him of his past, Chemo, One-shot, 911 call ooh child (things are gonna get easier) by doveious | T | 1.8k | Snippet from Ravi's childhood during chemotherapy, Angst, Cancer Treatment, Vomiting trauma sends you letters, without warning, for the rest of your life by swordgay1989 | G | 2.7k | Flashback to Ravi's childhood, Cancer, Chronic Illness, Chemotherapy, Angst 🔥the rest is still unwritten by strawberryspence | T | 8.7k | Buck & Ravi Friendship, Cancer Remission, minor ravi/omc, Beach Day, Car Rides, Healing After Trauma, sequel to all we see is sky for forever
Hanikkar (Ravi/Albert) 🌸
No Aunts for Jee-Yun by delinquentprincess | G | <1k | The 118's POV of Ravi and Albert dating, Short & Sweet sweat baby sweat by chromatophorica | E | 1.3k | Drunk Sex, Accidental Hookup, Friends to Lovers(?) The Reveal by crowstakeflight (seresindiaz) | G | 1.7k | Ravi and Albert go to the Madney wedding as each other's dates, Secret Relationship, Fluff Running on Airplane Mode by whatisreggieshortfor | NR | 1.8k | Miscommunication, Getting Together, Light Angst, Friends to Lovers right from the start (i gave you my heart) by chimneysrebar | G | 2k | Madney wedding, Fluff, Relationship Reveal, Chim cameo a turtle's shell. by sillinesshq | G | 2k | Fluff, Autistic Ravi, Supportive Albert, short & sweet Corresponding Shapes (Like Puzzle Pieces) by thetalee | T | 2.2k | Valentine's Day, Hanikkar Date Night 🔥three first dates by snowflick | T | 2.7k | Developing Relationship, Fluff, Chronically Ill Ravi, Supportive Albert, First Dates, Vomiting depollute me, pretty baby by shortndiaz | E | 3k | Domestic Fluff, Chronic Pain, Drabbles, prompt #4 is smut/explicit sex we'd never say we're just friends by ScatteredPhotographs | G | 3.7k | 5 times Ravi and Albert tried to hide their relationship from the 118 + 1 time they didn’t need to, Secret Relationship, Silly Goofy, 118 Family Feels oh shit, are we in love? by supernovamyth | T | 5.3k | FWB to Lovers, Flirting, Love Confessions 🔥Keep it Down by rainbow_nerds | T | 6k | Ravi and Albert neighbor AU, Friends to Lovers, meet ugly The 118's Soap Opera Curse by Sonayesul | T | 7k | Secret Relationship, Superstitions, Crack Treated Seriously, Angst w Happy Ending 🔥Six Dates & A Funeral by RighteousPunk | M | 54k | Buck and Chimney compete to matchmake Ravi, FWB Hanikkar, Pre-Buddie, Multiple POVs, Fluff, Angst 🔥Ravi and Albert's Guide to Fake Not-Dating by to_be_a_dreamer | T | 49k | Ravi and Albert try to avoid the "118 curse" by hiding their relationship from their friends and family, Secret Relationship, Character Lore, Angst
Other Romantic Pairings 💕
🔥i'm used to loving slowly by waveridden | T | 32k | May/Ravi/Albert, Polyamory, Getting Together, Roommates to Friends to Lovers, POV May Grant, Partial Slowburn
May/Ravi
i'll finally see what it means to be complete by chromatophorica | G | 2k | May/Ravi, Secret Admirer, Gift Giving, Fluff and now this thought drives me mad by ferager | G | 3k | Ravi stresses over a date with May, May/Ravi, Fluff, Supportive Chimney my flower baby (flower baby) by doveious | T | 10k | Five times Ravi got May flowers and one time May got Ravi flowers, Established May/Ravi, Fluff, 5 + 1
Buck/Ravi
after hours by v_greyson (greyson) | E | 13k | Buck meets Ravi's queer friends and they hookup, Buck/Ravi, FWB, Queer Community, Genderplay, Drinking, Explicit Sex 🔥A Guide to Playing Matchmaker for Your Boyfriend by  sammyunhinged | M | 52k | Ravi dates Buck instead of Tommy, Ravi/Buck, Pre-Buddie, Casual Relationship, Sexual Content, Ravi bestie OC 🔥good pretender by likeshipsonthesea | E | 85k | Buck and Ravi FWB, Explicit Sex, Hurt/Comfort, Mentions of Cancer, Indian Culture, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms (Buck's relationship w sex), Buddie slowburn, Multiple POVs
Buddie Driven Plot 🏡
good luck, babe! by QuietLittleVoices | G | 1.5k | Ravi confused by Buddie, Gossiping, Season 7 Setting the implications of observation by intotheblue | G | 1.7k | Ravi being suspicious of Buddie, short and sweet, Relationship Reveal r/AskReddit: Are My Coworkers Dating? by shelfthe_reader | NR | 2.5k | Ravi vents about Buddie on Reddit, Crack, various buddie traumas referenced 🔥The Packer Incident by jade_reads29 | M | 3.5k | Secret Relationship, Trans!Buck, Smut, porn with plot, Buddie mildly traumatizes Ravi new debate topic: is evan buckley a good boyfriend? by writelove | NR | 3.6k | Ravi thinks Buddie are together, Crack Treated Seriously, 118 Game Night, Fluff Just a name by AngyBegins | G | 4.4k | Buck keeps calling Ravi "Eddie", Buck & Ravi Friendship, Eddie goes to Texas Take The Bitter With The Sweet by fruitsdoesnotknow | T | 5k | Ravi being terrorized by platonic Buddie, dumbass4dumbass, the 118 being a family so far away but still so near by 42hrb | T | 6.2k | Eddie becomes friends with Lucy and Ravi, Coming Out, Pining this is it (i can feel it) by withmeornotatall | T | 9k | Ravi's POV of Eddie returning to the 118, Ravi & Lucy Friendship 🔥some things are meant to be secret (and not to be heard) by archerincombat | T | 10k | Sequel to the ravi fic, Established Buddie, Secret Relationship and only Ravi knows, Ravi/OMC (Sebastian ily) Four Can Keep a Secret by Daisies_and_Briars | T | 20k | Ravi and Hen scheme to expose secret relationship Buddie, post-bridge collapse, Miscommunication, Scheming with Henren
@cal-daisies-and-briars @doveious @queerpanikkar @hoediaz @bipitybopitydoo @strawberryspence @thetalee @to-be-a-dreamer @rainbow-nerdss @exhuastedpigeon @fruitsdontknow
@waveridden @chromatophorica @vgreysoncellars @sammyunhinged @likeshipsonthesea @shelfthe-reader @harpermiller @thirteenredvampirebites
⭐️ i apologize if you are not tagged as one of the writers for these works - lmk if i missed your @ so i can credit you 😊
⭐️ if you would like to be tagged in part 2 of my ravi fics (or my upcoming albert and may fic compilation) tag or comment below!!
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Slashing Through Your Trauma Pt 2
Notes: I started writing this a while back as a "fix it" fic for Scream 2 and Freddy VS Jason, and a chunk of it was sitting in my drafts. So, I said, its Friday the 13th, I don't have anything to do, and I wanna do this today. So, here's a small update on my Hallie & Kia centered universe.
We Are Not Dead
It was a nice getaway location, to be honest. One thing her research had taught her over the years was that sometimes, the legends of towns were simply that, and it seemed that this was the case with the Crystal Lake Killer. Throwing herself into looking up past murders in the town and piecing together how they seemed to have been able to occur, she concluded that obviously, someone had been an active serial killer or a duo/team in the 80’s, and either went on in their older years or passed down their legacy, or inspired a copycat. “It happens,” Mickey said.
“I uninvite your voice in my mind,” she said, in response to hearing him. After a soft scoff and gentle laughter, the voice left. All that remained was a curious librarian, whom Hallie offered merely a forced smile, and quickly turned away.
She had listened to reports on the way to Cunningham County. It mostly sounded like notions. One thing about it that took away her ability to believe were the accounts of some of the murders and some of the alleged reports of self defense. Some of the killings seemed unbelievable for somebody to be able to do unless they were exceedingly strong, yet people insisted it was some type of person who lived in the woods, possibly in a cabin, maybe feeding off of the plants and creatures… Physically, Hallie doubted if such a person would sustain enough strength to pull off some of this. It was more likely that someone went on hunting trips in these woods and used this Jason Voorhies legend as a scapegoat.
Besides, Jason Voorhies had been declared dead. Yes, someone found his mother's remains after her vengeful murder spree, but there was nothing to indicate that he was alive and committing murders in her honor. And, had he been alive, they likely would have been committing the murders together, before her demise…
A mother and her son, committing murder made her think of Mickey again and Mrs. Loomis. That made her think about the information in his personal things. Messages to the woman about someone he was interested in. “She thinks she's too good for me. Maybe she can see what I am. She'll become a therapist, if I let her. But, I don't intend to let her. I don't plan on letting her walk away from me, thinking that I'm some guy who wanted her in college and never got her. I'm gonna be the last person who touches her, when I snuff out her light.”
He had photos and videos of her. He had others that he told about her on the forums. She was Sidney’s best friend. Being close t0 her could get him closer to Sidney. If he could manage to gain her trust, he might have a door opened to Sidney. Sidney didn't trust a lot of people, but somehow, she trusted this one…
“Do you need help?” The librarian asked.
Hallie gave her a look, that was both irritated and confused, then noticed her hands were gripping the table tightly. She relaxed.
“I'm just looking up some information about the Crystal Lake Killer. Disturbing imagery. I suppose it made me tense up.”
“Are you another reporter, or.. God forbid, another podcaster?”
Hallie laughed, “No, no. Nothing so colorful. I'm a therapist. I'm doing this in my free time, just for studying.”
The librarian looked excited, “A therapist! Well, lady. This place sure could use one. Not sure where they find the ones they send to the survivor group, but they never stay. Those poor people have to lean on each other more than they can a doctor.”
“Oh. I'm not…” Hallie began to reiterate that this was a h0bby and not work, but the librarian gave her a pull ticket from the community board. She accepted it and watched the woman go to the counter to help someone. “W.A.N.D. Survival Union” and according to her phone, their meeting would be soon.
She was certain that she had done enough research for the time being, so she thought it couldn't hurt to pass by and perhaps peek in.
“We Are Not Dead!” Were the first words she saw, in bright blue letters on a yellow banner. The Fairy Godmother from the old Cinderella cartoon was on it, doing her magic thing with her wand… oh. W.A.N.D. We Are Not Dead. Got it… but Miss Bippity Boppity Boo? I guess…
The first face she saw was a white male, dark hair and eyes, a beard, pointy nose, and a sweater vest. “Hello. Are you here for WAND?” He asked. He was holding an iPad and a stylus.
“I'm just looking around,” she said, committing his face to memory, then breaking eye contact. “I'm studying the Crystal Lake Killer for…”
“A podcast?”
“No! Why is that the first thing that people here think?”
“I'm sorry. It's the most common reason that people come to Crystal Lake, well, after going down to the old campsite to explore. For college then?”
“For studies. I'm a therapist. I have a doctorate. If I had a podcast, it would be professional psychiatric information.” She was looking at him again and noted that he looked sad.
“Are you studying the killer, or those of us who got away?”
“I don't look into survivors uninvited.” She took a deep breath. “I survived a murderer too.” His eyes darted to her chest and she covered her scar. “And I study killers who seemingly repeat their acts or are copied by others.”
The man nodded gently. “Well. Of course, you're welcome to stay. Meeting's starting late today. I texted all of the usuals. Not everybody is a Jason survivor, so, don't feel isolated. If there's anyone who knows how it is… just… living with it all, it's this Slasher Survivor Support group.”
“Can I ask you why your group has the Fairy Godmother on the banner?”
He laughed and held his side. “Well, when it began, from what I know, there was a nice little lady conducting the meetings and one of the member’s kids made it as a gift.”
“The librarian said that therapists come and go through here. Was the Godmother one?”
“She was before my time, but she passed away, and I believe it's been a revolving door since.”
Hallie nodded and after watching sweater vest set up for a few minutes, realized that Camp Crystal Lake was close enough for her to see. Maybe there were still traces of a crime scene there. “Well, maybe I can catch the next one. I should go.”
He frowned, “Okay. Sure! Next one will be on time.” His smile returned. She left without giving her name or getting his. She drove away without looking back.
.
“Mmmm… Look at those buns!” Kia said, as she rolled up to the refreshment table that he was bending over, still setting up. She watched him blush under her stare and bit her lip. “They look scrumptious.”
“You are so bad!” He said, unable to stop smiling. He grabbed one of the honeybuns from the table. “I know they're your favorite,” he said, presenting it to her.
“You should know these are my favorite,”she chimed and reached behind him to grab a handful of his mostly nonexistent buttcheek.
“I appreciate the flattery,” he told her and kissed her on the nose. “That's my favorite.”
She smiled and his heart stopped just looking at her. So beautiful. One of the most beautiful women he had ever seen. One of the hottest girls from school. Kia Waterson.
Once upon a time, he had a crush on her best friend. It wasn't that he found Kia unattractive, not by a longshot. He found her unattainable. A girl like that would never look twice at him on his best day, and she made sure that he knew it back then. She was a mean girl. Shallow and superficial in looks and company. The fact that they were friends, he'd always wondered about, before he got to know her. Kia was insecure. She didn't feel beautiful enough. Again, not because she wasn't, but because there weren't a lot of affirmations for beauty like hers in Springwood, Ohio. So, she harped on her looks, scrutinized others, and kept her nose up high just in case anybody might see through her and find that girl, desperate for attention and adoration.
She even once considered having work done on her nose! Finding that out angered him. He was grateful every time he looked at her that it never came to be. A lot of things never came to be. But, one thing that did, and he was even more grateful about - she came to be his. The unattainable Kia Waterson had fallen in love with a nerd in a sweater vest, Charlie Linderman.
“Oh! You'll never believe what happened earlier…” he started. She had a mouth full of honeybun, so she wasn't in any position to guess. “Another Black woman came in here!” Kia's eyes widened and she started trying to swallow to ask more, but he kept talking. “She wasn't a podcaster. She was a therapist. And a survivor. She had a scar on her chest and she was…” he stopped. “Sad. She was really sad. And maybe scared. She sat for a bit, then sped off in an RV.”
Finally finished, she asked, “Was she pretty?”
“She was an older woman.”
“A pretty older woman?”
“Well. Yes.”
“Ugh!”
He laughed, “She wasn't prettier than you! Why is this even a topic?”
“I don't know. You might try to swap me out for a pretty, older lady whose body..” Kia's smile slowly faded. “I'm just teasing. I know you wouldn't do that.” She said the words like a question, needing some reassurance. That insecure girl inside..
Charlie got on his knee beside her chair and said, “If I had to stay in this position for the rest of my life just to see your face, I would. I would never let you go, Kia. Or give you up.” She leaned forward in her chair to kiss him, honeybun on both their lips now.
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hotchscoffeecup · 1 year ago
Text
drunk dial
pairing: platonic aaron hotchner/reader
rating: t
word count: 8.1k
tags: implied sexual assault, referenced sexual assault
summary: when you drunk dial your boss in need of rescuing from a night club, aaron hotchner doesn’t hesitate to respond. the only problem? you thought you’d called emily. hotch insists on you letting him take care of you for the night as you’re in no state to be on your own. as the night progresses, you find that you’re finally able to disclose a trauma you’d kept buried for years.
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“Hotchner,” he answers groggily.
A harsh sob echoes through the receiver and he sits up, bringing the phone down to view the caller ID. The dark slash of his brow furrows as he views your name and photo.
There’s concern in his voice as he says your name, but you don’t seem to hear it.
You heave another sob through the phone. “My friend left with some guy. And now this one, he won’t—” Your voice suddenly sounds far away the music pounding in the background overtakes your words. He’s missing information as your voice becomes clear once more. “He wants more than I’m willing to give Emily and I just want to go home.” Your words are slurred. “I just,” another choked sob, “I need he—” The line disconnects.
“Hello?” Hotch questions and tries your name again. He redials your number and curses as it goes to voicemail. Throwing back the sheets, he climbs out of bed and dials Prentiss’ number as he pulls a hoodie over his t-shirt.
She laughs as she answers, “Hotch, it’s past midnight. Shouldn’t you be asleep?”
He cuts her off and curtly explains the call he’d just received. “Where is she?”
“Oh, um, The 930 Club. She’s—”
“Thanks, Prentiss.” He hangs up and shoves his phone in his pocket. He grabs his raincoat and keys and swiftly exits his apartment.
The club isn’t far from his complex, but with Saturday night traffic in the heart of DC combined with the summer storm raging on, it seems to take ages. He lays on the horn as someone cuts him off and curses as he slams on his brakes. Briefly, he considers throwing the red and blue lights on, but thinks better of it. He’s not far now and after making it through the next red light, the club comes into view. Disregarding the no parking signs out front, Hotch pulls up alongside the curb and throws the SUV into park.
Despite the rain, a line stretches out the door. Couples and groups of friends clad in leather, satin, high heels, and sleek accessories huddle under wide umbrellas to protect themselves from the storm. Hotch approaches the door and a bouncer stretches his arm across the way.
“There’s a line, old man.” The bouncer inclines his head toward the line of anxiously waiting club goers. “Get to the back before I put you there myself.”
Hotch is unfazed by the bouncer and the sense of power his job provides him. Standing toe to toe with the man, he stares him down, his eyes hard. He reaches into his pants pocket and retrieves his badge. With two fingers, he flips it open and pushes into the bouncer’s face. “Supervisory Special Agent Aaron Hotchner,” he states flatly. “I’ve got an agent in trouble in there, so get the hell out of my way before I have you in handcuffs.” He’s bluffing, obviously, the bouncer has done nothing wrong. He doesn’t know that though, given how wide his eyes open in fear. He says nothing and steps aside, granting him entry.
“Thank you.” For good measure, Hotch drives his shoulder into the bouncer as he shoves his way into the noisy nightclub. His eyes dart around, scanning the scene. There are two long bars on opposite walls, a DJ against the short wall where dozens of people bump and grind against one another on the dance floor, and two levels of tall tables and booths for people to crowd around or sneak into to get away from the music.
On the phone, you’d sounded distressed. Your words were slurred and he could only hope and pray that you’d not been drugged by whatever “he” was with you at the time of the call. God, he could only hope that you were even still here. If he knew creeps as well as his job had accustomed him to, if a man was trying to procure a woman under the influence, he’d either leave immediately and attack her in a secondary location or he’d take her somewhere more private within the environment.
Pushing through the crowd, he shouldered past couples who shot dagger sharp glances at him and took the stairs two at a time up to the second floor. The music still pounded over the speakers up here, but this was clearly where people went to escape the bustle of the crowded dance floor and get away to drink or order food or conversate more
privately. He calls your name and begins scanning tables. Patrons dining or trying to steal a romantic moment glare at him. Some curse and tell him to fuck off. He pays them no mind. As he winds around tables, he begins losing hope despite there being much more of the club to explore. He has half a mind to shut the whole place down and call in the team, but that would be a gross overreaction. There is no evidence that you’re actually in danger or missing aside from a drunk misdial. Still though, his heart pounds erratically as he calls your name over the music.
He reaches the end of the second floor and at first doesn’t see that there are people in the booth they’re that far tucked into it. The man’s hulking frame blocks the girl from view and he knows it’s you.
“Hey!” he barks over the baseline.
“We don’t need anything,” the man says without looking back.
Fury floods his veins. Without a second thought, Hotch reaches for the man and grabs him by the back of the neck. He reels back, pulling the man to his feet. Catching his balance, the man pulls his fist back. As he aims to deliver a punch, Hotch ducks and sends his fist into the man’s gut. As the air vacates his lungs and he doubles over, Hotch fists his hands into his shirt and slams him back into the table. With the man immobilized, he looks up at you. A strap on your dress falls over one shoulder and your hair hangs limply, having fallen free of whatever style it had been in. You look at him from half hooded eyes, blinking slowly. The scene is spinning and your temples are throbbing.
“Are you okay?” Hotch asks. His knuckles blaze white as the man struggles beneath his grip.
“Stop moving!” he barks.
“Can somebody help me?” the man calls.
Someone is saying your name, asking if you’re ok. The music is loud and your ears feel like they’re plugged with cotton. Things seem to move quickly and slowly all at once. Where are you? You’ve not left the club yet, but where did Mariah go? There’s your name again. God, you’re really out of it. Mariah left, you remember. She left with Andrew’s friend and Andrew, God, he wouldn’t leave you alone. When was Emily going to get here? There’s your name again. You blink hard and try to get your bearings. Though things are hazy and tilted through your alcohol laden senses, a picture starts to form in front of you. Aaron Hotchner, your boss, has Andrew pinned against the table in front of you.
“Sir?” you question, though the word feels far away and unfamiliar on your tongue.
Hotch raises his eyes from Andrew, concern reflecting back at you in them. Your eyes widen as you take in Andrew’s form beneath him. You glance down at yourself and see your dress straps pulled down, exposing the lace of your bra. What the fuck had he been trying to do before Hotch got here?
Two bouncers approach as a crowd begins to gather, people are always hungry for drama after all.
“Is there a problem here?” the first bouncer asks. He’s tall, built, and wears sunglasses despite it being dark inside. His ginger beard is bushy and his brow is pierced. He looks pissed as all hell that he has to be up here breaking up a fight. Hotch recognizes the other bouncer from the door. When they make eye contact, his eyes widen.
“Yo, Liam, that’s that FBI agent I was telling you about.”
Liam arches a brow, but his expression softens. “What’s going on, officer? Or should I call you Agent?”
Hotch ignores him and pulls Andrew to his feet, pushing him toward the bouncers. “Get this guy out of here,” he orders. He looks toward you again, his eyes searching for signs of further harm. He turns his attention back to Andrew.
“Did you slip her something?”
Andrew’s face screws. “What? No!”
Hotch steps forward, his face inches from his, and repeats the question louder, “Did you give her something?”
Andrew flinches. “No! I don’t do that shit, man. She took a bunch of shots with her friend. Guys were buying them drinks all night. I just—”
“You just what?” Hotch questions, his voice low and dangerous. “Wait for a woman that can hardly stand, take her upstairs, hide away, and see just how far you can take it?”
“Hey, she was into it!”
Hotch grabs him by the jaw. “Look at her!” he says. “She can barely keep her eyes open! That’s not consent, idiot!”
Andrew swallows and he looks like he might wet himself.
“Hotch,” you say and try your best to sit up, the world spinning as you do so.
Hotch releases him, but first leans in close to his ear. “If you ever, and I mean ever try this again, with anyone. I will have you arrested and will personally make sure you never see the light of day ever again. I was a federal prosecutor, so I know how to make charges stick. Do I make myself clear?”
Andrew nods vigorously and a tear slips from his eyes. “Not so confident now, huh?” Hotch whispers, disdain dripping from his lips. “Get him out of here.”
He watches as the bouncers lead Andrew down the steps. Hotch immediately turns his attention on you. He slides into the booth beside you. “Did he hurt you?” he asks.
Your brow furrows as you try to make sense of what’s happening. The music is so loud. Hotch looks around and then back at you. “Let’s get you out of here, come on.” He stretches his hand out to you and you take it, letting him pull you out of the booth. When you find your feet, you stumble and he catches you, his arm bracing around your lower back.
“It’s raining,” Hotch says as he shrugs out of his jacket. “Take this.” He drapes it over your shoulders, his little finger curling under the strap of your dress and pulling it back into place as he does so. The smell of cedar and teakwood reaches your nose, a severe contrast to the club’s overarching scent of vodka, sweat, and the amalgamation of various perfumes and colognes sprayed in earnest.
The second you exit the club your head feels a fraction clearer. The air is muggy, the humidity amping up with the cold rain coming down after a week of intensely high temperatures.
Aaron reaches into his pocket and fishes out his car keys. He clicks the unlock button and the car beeps in response. He opens the door and helps you inside, his eyes lingering on you for a moment as you clumsily buckle your seatbelt to make sure you can get it on alright. Once secure, he gently shuts the door and jogs around to the driver’s side.
He slides into the driver’s seat and twists the key in the ignition. He places his hands on the wheel, but before shifting the car into gear, he looks at you, intensely. When he says your name, it’s gentle. It’s not the tone he uses in the office when he’s calling the team for a briefing or to review something you’d written in a report. There’s a warmth in his voice, and there’s real concern there too. “You don’t have to tell me,” he starts. “Just know that you can.”
You nod, squeezing your eyes shut as the world tilts on its axis. Your stomach roils and for a moment you’re afraid you might be sick. You take a deep breath and manage to hold it down. Hotch tilts his head, regarding you. “Is there anyone at home that can take care of you?”
“No,” you answer and this time you don’t shake your head to avoid aggravating the nausea. “My roommate is out of town visiting her family,” you speak slowly but your words still come out slurred.
Hotch nods and shifts the car into gear. “You can stay with me then, tonight.”
“No, sir I can’t let you do that. You’ve got Jack and—”
A smile cracks his stern visage as he pulls out into traffic. If you had your wits about you, you would’ve taken a mental snapshot as you don’t think you’ve ever seen such a genuine expression of mirth cross his face. “Jack is at his aunt’s. I wouldn’t have exactly been able to come out like this if he wasn’t. Beth has an event for work this weekend, which is why I’ve stayed back in DC. It’s no trouble at all.”
You sink back into the seat, a part of you unable to believe that this is happening while the other part of you is still trying to fully process what all had transpired in the last fifteen minutes.
“Hotch, how did you know—”
His eyes are on the road as he speaks. “You thought you’d called Emily. You called me.”
“Oh my God,” you groan, drawing out the last letter. A scarlett heat creeps into your cheeks and you cover your face with your hands. “So you heard—Jesus Christ. Oh my God.”
“Don’t worry about it,” Hotch says, his words genuine. “I’m glad I can help.”
The rest of the ride passes in silence. It’s not long by any stretch of the imagination, but the constant stop and go traffic of late night DC has your stomach doing somersaults. You squeeze your eyes shut and rest your head against the cool glass of the window hoping it’ll quell the churning in your belly.
A quiet groan escapes your lips as Hotch pulls into his designated parking spot at The Langham. It stopped raining. As soon as he shifts the car into park, your stomach feels as though it’s just been bounced around like. ping pong ball. “Oh god,” you moan and fumble with the door handle. Somehow you manage to undo the lock and fling open the door. As soon as your feet hit the pavement, you rush over to the nearest bush, the vomit you’d staved off finally forcing its way up and out of your body. It’s vile, the way the alcohol and stomach acid burns your throat.
Footsteps rapidly approach and there’s a hand at your neck, gathering your hair. “Alright, ok,” Hotch says soothingly, his other hand rubbing up and down your back. “Get it all out, oh yeah, yep. There you go.”
When your body stops purging itself, you gulp down a fresh breath of air before spitting the acrid taste of bile from your lips. You stay like that, hands on your knees, and take a few deep breaths. “Do you have your gun?”
Hotch releases your hair as you stand, but keeps a steadying hand on your arm. His expression is puzzled, his brow arched. “No, why?”
You roll your eyes and turn toward the sidewalk leading toward the front entrance to his building. “To kill me now so I don’t have to live with the embarrassment of knowing my boss just saw that happen.”
Something between a laugh and scoff escapes Hotch’s lips as he catches up to you in two long strides. Him and his long ass legs, you drunkenly muse.
The lights hurt your eyes and your temples continue to throb as you let Hotch navigate your way through his complex. The walk feels excessively long and you wonder if all apartment complexes are this maze-like. As he fishes his keys out of his pocket and unlocks the door to his apartment you realize you’re actually at Aaron Hotchner’s apartment. You’ve never been to his apartment. You’ve been to Emily’s, Penelope’s, and Spencer’s apartments; Rossi and JJ’s houses, but Hotch? Definitely not. Suddenly you feel like you are about to encroach upon the shadowy place Mufasa warns Simba about in The Lion King.
You blink and that clears the weird image forming of Hotch as a cartoonish fatherly lion from your mind. You stumble through the threshold as he pushes the door open and curse as he catches you again. “These fucking heels,” you grumble. As you reach down to work out the straps your stomach flips and you groan.
Hotch’s eyes flare slightly. “Why don’t you stay up there?” he cautions. “Let me help you.”
“That sounds like a good idea,” you respond, voice tight as your stomach threatens revolution once more.
He bends down on one knee and begins to undo the straps from around your ankles. He holds the back of your calf as he pulls the heel off and places it against the wall. You have to catch yourself on his shoulder to keep from falling but as soon as your foot falls flat on the floor, a languid moan leaves your lips.
“Good God, that feels so much better.”
He helps you slide out of the other high heeled shoe and stands. Without the heels on, he has a decent amount of height on you. You have to look up to meet his eyes, those eyes still shining with concern.
“Let me take the coat,” he says, lifting his hands toward you. You turn and shrug out of it, your limbs feeling awkward and heavy as you do so. He hangs it on a hook on the back of the door and gestures down the length of the hallway.
“It’s just the one bedroom,” he explains as he leads the way toward the main room. “You can sleep in my room. I’ll take the couch.”
“No!” you blurt. “No, no, no you don’t have to do any of that oh my God.”
Hotch chuckles in response. “I think you’ll thank me in the morning if you do.” Wordlessly, you follow as he leads the way to the aforementioned bedroom. He flicks the light switch on and the lamp on his bedside table illuminates the room. It’s simply decorated with store bought abstract paintings and dark blue linens on the queen sized bed. A framed photo of Jack sits on the nightstand, angled toward the bed. The idea of Hotch lying there looking at the image of his son tugs your heartstrings. You move past Hotch and plop down on the bedspread before reaching for the photo. You smile as you look at Jack’s crooked smile.
“He’s so precious,” you muse and poke Jack’s nose through the flat plane of glass. You look up at Hotch from where he stands in the doorway. “He’s lucky to have a dad like you, sir.”
Hotch smiles softly and crosses the distance to sit beside you, the mattress sinking beneath your combined weight. “Thank you,” he says. “I’ll be honest, it's hard to feel like a good dad some days with our job.”
You bump him with your shoulder, or at least that’s your intention.You more or less use your entire arm to nudge him just barely. “You give him all the time you’re able, we all see that. If we do, Jack definitely does.”
You pass him the picture frame and smile. Hotch smiles in turn, his lips together. “Thank you,” he says as he places it back on the nightstand. “I hope he grows into a good man.”
“With you as his father, there’s no doubt. There ought to be more dads like you out there to teach their sons how to be men.” Your smile falters and your voice grows small. “Maybe then they wouldn’t try to see just how far they can push the envelope.”
Tears spring to your eyes and you use the back of your hand to clumsily wipe them away. Turn off the waterworks, you chide yourself. Your temples already throb from how much the alcohol, first round of tears, and vomiting dehydrated you, no need to compound it now with more tears.
Hotch says your name quietly. “You can talk to me, you know.” He pats your hand that rests atop the bedsheets. “I’m not your boss right now, I’m your friend.”
Your lip quivers as you stare blankly at the wall ahead. “If I talk about it, that means I let it happen. I’m a fucking FBI agent, Hotch. I should know better than to drink that much. I should—”
Hotch’s brow pinches. “Woah, woah, woah,” he starts, “where is this coming from? You know better than anyone that how much you drink doesn’t matter, that doesn’t entitle anyone else to you or your body. And fuck if you’re an agent, you’re allowed to go and enjoy drinks and a night out without worrying if some asshole is going to try and take advantage of you. I think I scared him within an inch of his life, too. You don’t have to worry about him anymore.”
But it’s not about Andrew. It’s not about tonight anymore. Tears slip over your lash line.They’re hot and fat and you hate how they have little minds of their own, dropping freely down your cheeks. You know what he says is true. Hell, you preach it to everyone, especially when you teach self defense at the local university. What you wear is never an excuse for someone to touch you. How you dance isn’t an excuse for someone to grope you. How much you drink isn’t an excuse for someone to lay claim to your flesh. The only thing that means yes is explicit, enthusiastic consent. You know this. You teach this.
But right now, it’s so hard to believe because that’s what you had to fight so hard to teach yourself when you first had to learn what happened wasn’t your fault.
You drop your head into your hands and stifle a sob. “God, it was nearly ten fucking years ago.”
“What was ten years ago?” Hotch asks, his voice soft and kind.
Oh God. You’d said that out loud.
You scrub your hands over your face and curse as you smear mascara into your eye. “Fuck!” you exclaim as your hand flies to your eye instinctively.
“I’ve got something I think can help,” Hotch says as he rises from the bed and darts out of the room. From your point of view, you can’t see anything but you hear bottles rummaging around from where you imagine is the bathroom out in the hall. When he returns he carries a small green package in his hand. He crouches in front of you and peels back the plastic film on the container. With two fingers he extracts a wipe and folds it in half. As he reaches for your face he hesitates, wipe paused in mid air above your cheek. “Is this alright?” he asks.
Sniffling, you nod. With one hand, Hotch gingerly wraps his fingers around your wrist. As he pulls it away, he uses his other hand to place the cool moist towelette against your eye. He holds it there for a moment before he begins to wipe and blot at the black swirls of mascara that had dried in tear stained patterns around your eyes and cheeks and whatever vestiges of eyeshadow remained. Once that wipe is fully soiled, he retrieves a fresh one; repeating the gesture on the other eye before moving on and clearing away what remained of your face and lip makeup. You don’t speak while he does this, and you don’t have to. You needed it. You needed that. You needed someone. You needed him. A friend. Someone that would ask no questions and just show up for you when you needed them most. No questions asked. And when he did ask questions, when Hotch did, there was no expectation to answer. But right now, in this strange moment, in Aaron Hotchner’s apartment, in his bed no less, you felt like you could finally tell someone.
“I was a teenager,” you say as he takes one final swipe at your cheek.
His hand freezes along your jawline and his eyes lock on yours. “You don’t have to do this,” he says gently, lowering his hand.
“If I don’t say it now on what courage the alcohol left in my system is giving me, I’m afraid I never will.”
Hotch sits back on his heels. “Alright.”
“I was dating an older guy at the time. I was a freshman in college. He was a senior; vice president of his fraternity. He came from a wealthy family, too. I was naive and so excited to be dating someone like that, someone with status. I grew up comfortably, but not that well off. He took me to nice dinners and bought me expensive gifts. We had a physical relationship, and it started out fine enough.” You pause and take a deep breath. “But we started fighting. He wouldn’t,” you pause. “I couldn’t get him to talk to me or communicate in any way that led to resolution when we did. He’d just keep apologizing and told me that he’d do better next time. He’d start kissing me to interrupt and then his hands would be in my pants and I just,” you stop and shake your head. “I thought if I could just deal with what he did physically, that things would be fine again if I just pretended I liked what was happening and got it over with. I thought that we’d go back to the fun, happy go lucky couple everyone knew us as. Until it happened again, and again, and again. When he graduated I finally felt safe enough to break things off once there was distance between us. I knew something had felt off about those experiences. It never occurred to me that that was assault.”
“You suffered through numerous unwanted physical advances because he emotionally manipulated you through stonewalling.” Hotch says quietly. It’s not an explanation, but validation of your experience.
A choked laugh escapes your lips. “I know that now. At the time, I thought assault was like what you see on TV. That it’s some stranger in an alley that blitz attacks you. I never thought it could be someone you knew, let alone someone you were in what you believed was a loving and committed relationship.” You shake your head again, a wry smile playing on your lips. “Imagine my surprise when I learned that the perpetrators were almost alway statistically someone the victim knows.”
A warm hand slips into yours. You look up and Hotch is looking at you intently. “What happened wasn’t your fault.” He says, squeezing your hand.
You lick your chapped lips and drop your eyes, nodding. “It took a long time for me to learn that.”
“I can’t imagine how hard that must have been,” Hotch says. “To have gone through that alone,” he shakes his head. “I’m so sorry.”
“Thank you,” you reply, because what else was there to say? “I wasn’t completely alone. I did go to counseling throughout the remainder of my time in school, they had services for the students. There was a support group, too; one for people who’d experienced sexual violence. It was there I really learned that things weren’t my fault. Other people had experienced similar things. Without that, I don’t think I’d have made it through honestly. I definitely wouldn’t be here.”
His hand squeezes around yours once more. “I’m glad that you are.” He smiles and a dimple forms in his cheek. “I know I'm a better man for having known you. The team, hell, the impact you have on the lives of those going through the worst possible moments of their lives in these cases we work…you have touched so many lives for the better. Please never, ever forget that.”
You smile crookedly and it feels somewhat genuine. “What do you think gets me through the day?”
The throbbing in your temples intensifies suddenly and you screw your eyes shut, your hands moving instinctively to rub them. “God, I’m going to be so hungover in the morning.”
Hotch claps his hands together. “Let’s see if we can’t get ahead of that.”
He leaves the room and when he returns he has a glass of water. “Here,” he says and passes you the cup.
You graciously accept it and take a long drink, the cool water soothing your throat, raw from crying and vomiting. “Thank you,” you murmur.
“It would probably help if you got some sleep. Do you feel up to taking a shower?”
You scoff, “Ok, Hotch. I threw up and it helped a little bit, but I’m not that sober.”
He chuckles and puts his hands up in surrender. “Fair enough. Let me at least get you some clothes. I know sleeping in a cocktail dress won’t be too comfortable.”
“Do you know?” you tease.
He presses his lips together. “Let me go see what I can find.”
You exhale a short laugh as he disappears from view and you fall back onto the mattress, a dull thud echoing as your body hits the sheets. You heave out a big sigh and stare at the ceiling. “This is a weird fucking night.”
You close your eyes and behind closed lids, it feels like you’re spinning. Yep, definitely not sober. You open your eyes and lazily reach up to start pulling bobby pins from your hair.
“Alright, I’ve got a pair of sweats and an old academy hoodie that should fit you.”
At the sound of Hotch’s voice, you let your head loll to the side. “You look absurdly tall from this angle,” you muse.
Hotch chuckles, “Spoken like someone desperately in need of sleep.” He steps into the room and drops the clothes onto the bed.
“Hotch?” you question, ignoring his last comment.
You roll onto your side and push yourself back into a sitting position. He arches an eyebrow. “Yes?”
“Why is it you’ve got makeup wipes in your apartment?” You inhale sharply. “Ooo, are you secretly a drag performer?”
Hotch laughs. “I am not a drag performer, though I do think Anderson does drag brunch on Saturday mornings if I remember right.”
You blink twice. “I’m sorry, and you’re only telling me this now?”
Hotch shrugs. “I’m surprised you don’t know about it. Garcia does.”
Your jaw drops. “Garcia knows?? Oh, when I get my hands on her—”
“To answer your question though,” Hotch butts in, an amused glint shining in his eyes. “They’re Beth’s.”
A smile pulls at your lips. “Beth keeps things at your apartment? What are we talking, like, a couple of things on the counter? A drawer?”
Hotch’s eyes drop to the floor as a scarlet blush creeps up his neck and spreads across his cheeks.
“Oh my God, this is serious isn’t it?” You feel the apples of your cheeks as your smile widens. “Spill, Hotch! Should I be looking at outfits for the wedding?”
To that, Hotch raises his hands as a smile splits his lips. “Calm down,” he laughs. “We’re not quite at wedding bells, but we do see each other almost every weekend. With the commute on the train, it is easy to have a drawer or two at one another’s apartments.”
You feel like kicking your feet, you’re so happy. If anyone deserved this kind of joy and love in their life, it was Hotchner. God knows he deserved it after all the hell he’d been through, all the trauma he survived.
“I’m really happy for you,” you say. “Beth is a remarkable woman”.
Hotch nods, a sheepish smile playing on his lips. “She is.”
You reach over and pull the clothes onto your lap. “Thanks, again, Hotch.” You toy with the sleeve of the hoodie in hand. “As horrified as I was when I realized I’d called you instead of Emily, I’m glad you came. I’m glad it was you.”
“We’re a team. We’re family,” Hotch replies. He leans against the doorframe. “Hell, I’m old enough to be your father. Maybe that’s why I’ve always felt a bit more protective of you, anyway. So, when I heard your voice on the line, there was no hesitation. I’d like to think if I had a daughter and she were in trouble, that someone in her life would do the same.”
You spring off of the bed, a little uncoordinated due to alcohol still gently buzzing in your veins at this point, and throw your arms around him. You bury your face in his neck and though, muffled, you say, “Thank you, Aaron. Thank you so much, for everything.” You don’t need to say what for, he knows. Your gratitude extends far beyond just rescuing you from the night club.
His arms snake around you, his palms pressed flat against the middle of your back as he squeezes you tightly.
“You’re so welcome,” he says into your hair. “I’m so proud of you, you know. Don’t ever forget that.” He pulls away just so and presses a fatherly kiss to your hairline, “I’ll be on the couch if you need anything. Don’t hesitate to wake me up.”
You nod and brush away a stubborn tear. God, you’d think you’d have nothing left in the tank at this point. You stifle a yawn as you close the door. The clothes Hotch left you fit well enough; the warmth and coziness of the fleece lined fabrics acting as security blanket as you tuck yourself in between the sheets. You barely remember to flick off the lamp on the bedside table before crashing onto the pillows where the heaviness of sleep finally drags you under to the sweet realm of nothingness.
Three things are incredibly clear the second you wake up: one, it’s too bright and you have to squint against the white rays of sunlight cutting through the slats in the blinds; two, your mouth feels like it’s stuffed full of cotton balls, you swallow but there’s not even an inkling of saliva to wet your dry throat; and three, it feels like someone has been slamming on a timpani inside of your skull.
You exude a long, slow groan into the pillow before rolling onto your side to get a glimpse of the alarm clock on Hotch’s nightstand. The red numbers blink back 10:23AM. There’s a fresh glass of water on the nightstand alongside two tablets and a folded piece of paper.
Your brow furrows as you prop yourself onto your elbow and reach for the note. You unfold it with one hand and in Hotch’s tight, neat scrawl it reads:
Ran out to grab a few things. I left some aspirin there on the table. You should probably take them.
-Hotch
“You don’t have to tell me twice,” you mutter as you toss the paper onto the bed.
You try not to gag as the pills start dissolving on your tongue and quickly chase it with the glass of water. After washing them down, you make a rather unattractive display of gulping down the remaining water. You drink it so quickly that some spills over the glass and you have to use the sleeve of your sweater, well Hotch’s sweater oops, to wipe off your face.
It doesn’t sound like anyone else is home. Pushing back the sheets, you swing your legs over the side of the bed and stand and for the first time, the room isn’t spinning. Even though Hotch is out, you still walk on the balls of your feet as if you need to be quiet. It feels strange to be stepping out into the hallways and walking into his bathroom. Sure, you’d swung by his apartment a few times to drop off a file or other work necessities. You’d never been in his house though.
Walking in and using his bathroom feels so strange, like an invasion of privacy. Like his bedroom, it’s simply decorated. A shower curtain decorated with blue and green swirls lines one wall. Plush bath mats of a similar blue line the area in front of the shower and sink. His very few toiletries sit in a neat row to the left of the faucet on the sink. He’s a Gillette guy, interesting. You’d always taken him for an Old Spice sort of man. You hear the front door and stop profiling his bathroom, instead, quickly using it for its intended purposes. You can’t help yourself though as you dry off your hands. You pull open the two drawers beneath the sink and smile to yourself. The one holds all of Hotch’s things: razor, comb, toothpaste, the usual; the other is clearly Beth’s: makeup, hair elastics, and the green makeup wipes sit neatly inside among other items. You bump the drawers closed with your hips before making your way back out into the hallway.
“Hey, Hotch,” you say, “Thanks again so much for—” Words fail you as you look up and see JJ and Prentiss in his living room.
Wide smiles spread across their faces. JJ spreads her fingers and holds her hands in the air, “Surprise!”
Brow furrowed, you cross the room and let them pull you into quick hugs.
“Not that I’m not happy to see you all, but what’s going on? Where’s Hotch?”
Emily’s perfectly manicured eyebrows arc toward her hairline as she tilts her head, “He thought you could use a pick me up.”
“So, he called you guys?”
JJ nods. “We’ve all had rough nights, followed by even rougher mornings.” She inclines her head toward Emily. “Remember the morning Hotch ran that triathlon?”
Emily cringes. ��God, don’t remind me!”
“Where is Hotch, anyway?” you ask, craning your neck around Emily and JJ.
“Oh,” Emily says, her lips forming the shape of the word. “He should be right behind us he—”
Just then, the front door swings open and it’s not Hotch.
“There she is!” exclaims Penelope. She waltzes into the apartment, adjusting the massive purse on her shoulder as she does so. Her knee length pink skirt swishes around her legs as she crosses the room to pull you into an embrace. The smell of jasmine clings to you as your face is buried in her chest and neck. She pulls away after a long moment, though her hands don’t drop from your shoulders. Her eyes scan your face. “Oh, sweetheart, look at you. Do not fret! Penelope is here to help get you feeling refreshed and revitalized!”
You look to JJ and Emily for help. “I look like shit, don’t I? Be honest.”
JJ shakes her head. “Noooo.”
Emily presses her lips together and tilts her head back and forth, “Well—”
JJ slaps a hand against her stomach and Emily winces. “What?!”
“Drink this,” Penelope says. She reaches into her bag and pulls out a bottle of yellow liquid. You take it and turn to read the label, Crisp Lemon Berry Pedialyte. “It’s got electrolytes. You need those!”
“Yes ma’am,” you say agreeably and crack open the bottle. The label makes it seem like it’ll be better than it is, but the taste is bearable. You need as much hydration as you can get at the moment, so you don’t complain.
“Sorry I took so long!” Hotch’s voice fills the room as he enters carrying a drink tray of coffees and an extra one in his free hand. “Line at the cafe was nearly out the door.”
“Oh my God, is that coffee?” you ask, salivating at the thought.
Penelope points a purple polished finger at you. “Finish that, then you can have coffee.”
He sets a cup down on the kitchen table before approaching them in the living room. “Non-fat, vanilla latte for you,” Hotch says, passing a cup to JJ. “London fog for Emily, can’t quite shake England there, can you?” he teases as Emily accepts the cup, not before flicking him off though with a cheeky grin playing on her berry red lips. Iced matcha green tea latte—”
“With soy?” Penelope questions, eyeing the cup suspiciously.
“With soy,” Hotch confirms and she accepts it happily.
“Last but not least, almond milk mocha for you.” He holds the cup out and smiles warmly. You hold his gaze for a moment, the exchange carrying more than a simple ‘thank you’ would allow for. He dips his chin just slightly in acknowledgment. As you reach for the cup, Penelope’s hand shoots out to intercept, her bangles jangling against her wrist.
“I’ll take that!” she chirps before taking a long sip of her own drink.
“Hey!” you whine.
Penelope gestures toward the Pedialyte with your coffee. “Finish!”
You roll your eyes and reluctantly chug the remaining liquid. “There,” you say and shake the empty bottle. “Happy?”
“Very!” pipes Penelope. “Oh! Here!” she reaches into her bag and withdraws a drawstring bag. Did she own the Mary Poppins bag? How did all of this fit inside of her purse? “I stopped by your apartment and grabbed a few things. Toothbrush, deodorant, change of clothes, the works.”
“Oh, Penelope Garcia, you are my angel!” You gratefully take the bag into your hands and disappear down the hall into the restroom.
The aspirin has started to kick in alongside what attempts you’ve made to rehydrate and the throbbing in your skull has dwindled to a soft drumming. Searching through the contents of the bag, you praise Garcia’s name as you find your skincare and toothbrush.
It takes all of ten minutes for you to brush your teeth, wash your face, and style your hair up and out of your face. Garcia had packed you two different styles of underwear, (leave it to her to give you the choice of thong or bikini styled undergarments. She’s probably also one of the only people you’d feel comfortable rummaging through your underwear drawer if you’re being honest) a pair of leggings, and a cropped Fleetwood Mac t-shirt. You change quickly and fold the sweats and sweater Hotch had lent you. You throw all of your toiletries into the bag and shrug it over shoulder before scooping Hotch’s clothes into your arms.
Hotch and the girls are sitting around the coffee table on the couch and recliner, enjoying their beverages. Penelope smiles widely when you emerge.
“There she is!” she exclaims. “I brought your Birkenstocks too. They’re by the door. Hotch said you’d worn heels out and I knew you definitely wouldn’t want to be in those.”
“Good call,” you say and take your coffee from Penelope. You take a slow sip of the warm mocha and moan.
Everyone laughs. Emily checks her watch and shoots up. “We better get going if we’re going to catch Anderson’s performance.”
Your eyes widen at that. “Wait.”
Emily smiles and nods. “Yep. He comes on in about an hour. We figured you’d need a nice greasy brunch after last night. The place he performs at makes a mean breakfast sandwich.”
“And potatoes with sausage gravy!” Penelope adds. “Though I’m more partial to mushroom gravy because precious baby piggies should not be slaughtered for my breakfast.”
“Okayyy, Penelope,” JJ teases as she loops an arm around her shoulders. “I’m pretty sure they added veggie sausage to their menu just for you.”
“Yeah,” Emily agrees. “They were probably afraid she’d hack their system and mess with their food shipments otherwise.”
Penelope looks over her shoulder as JJ guides her to the door. “I could do that!”
“Gonna pretend I didn’t hear that!” Hotch calls after them as JJ and Penelope leave the apartment.
“I wonder if they remember I’m the one with the car keys,” Emily says, her lips drawn into a warm smile. “Meet you downstairs?”
You nod. “Yes, I’ll be there in a second.”
Emily nods and leaves. You cross the living room toward the door where Hotch stands, one arm holding it open.
“Hotch I—
He shakes his head. “Don’t.”
“No, Hotch. I’m serious. What you did for me last night, I can’t even begin to thank you.”
“And you don’t have to,” he says, his tone firm. You look up and meet his unwavering gaze. “I would do it again without question. Like I said last night, we’re not just a team, we’re family. We look out for each other. We pull each other up when we’re at our lowest. In fact, I should be the one thanking you.”
You can’t help the quizzical expression that pinches your features. “For what? All I did was wake you up in the middle of the night, throw up in your bushes, and kick you out of your own bed on a Friday night.”
Hotch laughs and shakes his head. “Okay, well when you say it like that, it definitely doesn’t look good. What I was going to say though, is thank you for trusting me. I know that I wasn’t who you expected last night, but I’m glad I could be the one to help you when you needed it. Furthermore, I’m incredibly grateful that you felt as though you could trust me to tell me about your past. I know that can’t have been easy. And if you ever need someone to talk to, I hope it’s clear now that you’ll always have a listening ear with me.”
A surge of emotion courses through you in that moment and you can’t help but launch yourself at him. You loop an arm around his neck and awkwardly attempt to hug him with the other arm that stills holds his clothes, the bundle of fabric creating an odd wedge between your bodies. Hotch is taken aback by the gesture, but his arms comfortably fold around your back and he squeezes you gently.
“I could’ve used someone like you, you know.” You say after a moment. “I didn’t really have any older male figures I could talk to at the time it happened.”
“Well, I’m here now,” he assures you. “And I’m not going anywhere. That is, until Strauss gets sick of me.”
You pull back and scoff. “Yeah, like that’ll happen any time soon.” You hold the clothes out to him. “Here! Before I walk out with them.”
“It’s actually a bit breezy out there,” Hotch says as he takes the bundle and passes you back the sweater. “Why don’t you take this?”
You reach out and accept it, pulling it back into your chest. “I’ll bring it with me to the office on Monday.”
“Sounds good,” he says with a smile. “Oh! And you’ll probably want these.” He walks away and while he’s off grabbing whatever it is he’s talking about, you scoop your heels up off the floor and slide into your Birkenstocks.
Hotch returns with a pair of black Ray Bans. “If I know one thing about hangovers,” he says as he passes them to you. “It’s how horrible a sunny day can be on the eyes.”
He reaches for the door knob and pulls it open for you. “Enjoy your weekend. I’ll see you at work on Monday.”
As you slide his sunglasses up the bridge of your nose, you curse. “Shit! The report on the McPherson case. I was going to work on it today. I’ll email it to you first thing tomorrow.”
“It’s already taken care of,” Hotch explains. “Emily and JJ took care of it for you before coming over this morning.” He’d orchestrated everything with them as soon as he’d woken up to make sure you had nothing to worry about today except for fighting your hangover. He’d not told them everything of course, he’d never betray your trust like that. Some things the team didn’t need to know, and that was okay. If you were ever ready to tell them, he knew you would in time. For now, he just told them that you’d had a tough night and would need some TLC from the girl gang. They hadn’t even bothered with follow up questions. The three girls were ready to drop what they were doing and change their plans to be able to bring comfort and fun to your Saturday morning. He’d have done the same thing for any of them if they’d been in your shoes.
Your lips quirk into a small smile knowing further words weren’t necessary to convey your gratitude and appreciation for all he’d done and continues to do. “I’ll see you, Monday.”
He smiles in turn, “See you, Monday.”
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comatosebunny09 · 7 months ago
Text
Thinking about limerence!reader getting caught up in the rain after a show.
And maybe you wander outside the venue to clear your mind because you’re starting to feel everything. The kidnapping, the torture. Your past traumas creeping in through the cracks of your psyche. Your love that’ll never be reciprocated. Playing second fiddle to someone you’ve never been a match for.
You can have anyone. Everything. And yet you’re falling apart because reality’s sunken in, thick and murky like ink spilled over water.
You haven’t taken time to grieve. Time to process things. To mourn, to move on, to accept. Everything’s burbled to the surface like an overfilled caldron, and you just can’t—
Fuck.
The rain provides good cover in the night for you to cry. You hate it, but sometimes, it’s a necessary evil. You’ll give yourself five minutes. Five minutes to unravel, and afterward, you have to pick up the pieces. You’re a tough bitch. Big girls don’t cry.
While you’re quietly sobbing-slash-laughing at how pitiful you must look—makeup smudged, hair mussed, costume clinging to your body like a second skin, soaked to the bone—white lights creep up behind you.
You turn and squint against their brilliance, shielding your eyes with a hand overhead. Once your sight’s adjusted, you make out the sleek outline of a car. A luxury vehicle, and you’re all too familiar with the ornament that shines on its hood.
A dark silhouette steps from the driver's side, slamming the door shut. There’s no mistaking that familiar stride as the figure nears you. That hurried click of expensive loafers. That customary shade of red he always dons dyed a deep burgundy by the rain.
His brows knit with concern as he steps to you beneath the streetlight, and the rain matting his hair to his skin does nothing to deter from his elegance. It accentuates it, and, and...
What the fuck is this? Are you playing a damsel in distress in some cliche harlequin romance novel?
His lips part slightly as he pants. Like he ran a marathon just to find little old you.
“What are you doing in the rain?” Sylus asks with a hint of concern, voice rivaled by the downpour patterning the concrete around.
You smile slightly, grateful your tears are indistinguishable from the droplets coasting down your cheeks.
“Admiring the view,” you jest. Hopeful he doesn’t pick up on the double entendre. You don that air of routine confidence and playfulness despite your heart splintering into pieces, and you flourish your fingers as if it’s the most obvious thing.
He gives you an exasperated look. Shimmies out of his jacket and slips it onto your shoulders. It’s wet and heavy but warm and smells inherently safe. Just like him. And it’s natural for him to do things like this—to offer you his coat like the gentleman he’s always been beneath the playboy facade.
Your lips twitch as another wail swells in your chest. But you tamp it down. You don’t deserve his kindness. His pity. And he doesn’t deserve to see you fall apart. Not when he handed you away so easily.
Sylus slides his hands down your arms as if to soothe. To ward away the cold, and he squeezes. His sunset hues flash with something indescribable before he quickly steps around you, gently ushering you to the passenger side of his car.
Once you're both inside, he turns up the heat. The windows fog, and for a while, only the hiss of the AC and the swish of the windshield wipers fill the impenetrably thick silence between you.
Your forehead thunks against the crisp glass of the window, and a bout of drowsiness sinks below your skin. You briefly watch his reflection cast on the window, mouth quivering with words left unbidden.
“I’ll take you home,” he finally insists. And you flinch as if branded by iron at the easy slide of his voice.
Sylus spares you a sidelong glance when you say nothing in return, the gears in his head frantically churning. He peels out of the alleyway when he finds you won’t honor him with a reply. Sets a course for your flat on the outskirts of the city.
Your hand’s on the doorknob leading into your home. Before you can push it open, you turn to him with beseeching eyes. Don’t know how to keep your damn mouth shut sometimes, your heart bleeding pretty red on your sleeve.
You’re both still water-logged, and he’s watching you with expectant eyes. Like he knew things would come to a helm before the night’s conclusion.
“What do you even want with me,” you relent to the air between you without really thinking.
“What do you mean?” he replies, voice crackling with hints of remorse.
“You know what I mean, Sylus. I mean, why in the hell do you keep coming back to me? Why do you have this way of finding me no matter how much distance I put between us? Like there isn’t someone else you should be following around like a lost puppy?”
His brows dip in the outer corners. A forlorn smile rounds his lips, and he shoves a hand into his pocket. Always so cool, so put together.
He slightly cocks his head to the side, carefully turning over his follow-up in his mind.
“Is it so wrong for me to want you both?”
You snort, face burning and eyes glossing over with the threat of fresh tears. “Of course it is.”
He still dons that morose smile. Looks down at the ground, slightly shaking his head. “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry.”
Tch.
You turn away from him to draw your door open. Slip inside your inky entryway, and you press your cheek against the glacial oakwood, half-peering at the man outside.
“Goodnight, Sylus,” is all you can muster. Catch a glimpse of the anguish flashing over his features before the door softly clicks shut.
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internetdaddy98 · 12 days ago
Text
The Ties That Bind Us - Chapter 35
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Previous | Next [Series Masterlist] Content Warning: 18+; MDNI: explicit content
------------------------------------------------------------------
One year married. Six months pregnant. One very hormonal wife and one deeply devoted, unfairly attractive ER attending husband.
The ER was mayhem incarnate, but so were you.
“Is it warm in here, or is it just me?” you muttered, tugging at the collar of your maternity scrubs as you walked alongside Robby. “I feel like I’m going through puberty but in reverse. Everything itches. I want to cry. And I also want to climb you.”
Robby chuckled. “That’s a hell of a morning update, sweetheart.”
“Don’t ‘sweetheart’ me unless you’re planning to do something about it,” you muttered under your breath, eyeing the way his cargo pants hung just a little too well on his hips. Your gaze lingered. “Why do your shoulders look broader today? Did you train in the morning? 
“...I carried a trauma patient up two flights of stairs,” he offered with a smirk. “Does that count?”
“You’re really pushing your luck, Robinavitch.”
—-------------
Exhibit A: On-call room
You had dragged Robby into the cardiology on-call room with the pretense of needing a nap.
The second the door clicked shut behind them, you spun and grabbed the front of his scrubs, eyes wild and frustrated. “Do you have any idea what you’ve done to me?”
Robby’s brows rose, amused. “Good afternoon to you, too.”
“No. No, you don’t get to look like that. With your sleeves rolled up, smelling like pheromones, handing me water bottles like some kind of knight-slash-fertility god.”
“You are carrying our child,” he pointed out, brushing his knuckles against your cheek, “so the fertility bit is kind of on the nose.”
You groaned and backed him into the bed, straddling his lap before he could even get another word in.
“You drive me insane,” you said, mouth brushing his jaw. “I wake up thinking about you. I dream about you. I sit in meetings trying not to imagine your hands on me.”
“Hey,” he murmured, voice thickening. “I love you. I want you happy. And healthy. And-”
“—ravished,” you finished, grinding down against him.
He sucked in a breath. “Jesus, Y/N—”
You kissed him hard, hands slipping beneath his waistband, as he gasped against your mouth.
It was desperate. Beautiful. Chaotic. And very, very real.
By the time you stepped out the door, your braid was coming loose and Robby’s hair was wild. Dana caught sight of them, arched a brow, and immediately walked the other way. -----------------------------------------------------------------
Exhibit B: Supply room
Later, Robby was restocking chest tubes when you all but cornered him in the supply closet.
“We need to talk,” you whispered, already closing the door.
He turned, half amused. “You’re glowing.”
“I’m burning. My skin feels electric. If I don’t touch you in the next thirty seconds, I might combust.”
“Baby—”
“I know it’s inappropriate. I know. But I’ve been thinking about your hands on my hips since 2 p.m., and now I’m not thinking anymore. I’m doing.”
Her mouth was on his neck before he could object again, hands under his shirt. He caught her, palms spread over her lower back, guiding her against the wall gently so he didn’t press against her bump too hard.
“Y/N,” he growled against her ear, “we’re in a closet.”
“And I’m your wife. Who you haven’t kissed in hours.”
He couldn’t argue with that.
The kiss deepened fast, sloppy and hungry, all breathless moans and half-stifled gasps. You reached for him, fingers frantic, and he groaned, teeth dragging across her throat.
Outside, someone passed by whistling. Inside, you murmured his name, hips shifting with purpose as he rocked into you. You arched into him, head falling on his chest.
“Five more minutes,” you whispered, panting.
“I need ten,” he replied, voice rough. “You’re too good for just five.” ---------------------------------------------------
Exhibit C: The bathroom
The text came through at 6:06 PM.
Bathroom in South Wing. Now.
Robby had to physically bite the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing out loud. 
“Everything alright?”
“Urgent consult.”
“In the bathroom?”
Robby didn’t answer. He was already moving.
When he opened the door, you were already leaning against the counter, flushed, shirt unbuttoned halfway. You gave him a look that could melt titanium.
“You’re late.”
“I had to get away from the residents without looking suspicious.”
“You’re terrible at lying,” you said, pulling him in by his scrub top.
“Luckily, I’m great at making you forget.”
The moment their lips met, it was chaos again, hands tangled in fabric, breathless laughter, Robby lifting you to sit on the counter, careful and delicate. Your fingers were already sliding beneath the waistband of his pants, and he exhaled roughly.
“You sure?” he whispered, brushing his lips over your collarbone.
“Positive. Shut up and kiss me.”
They emerged ten minutes later. Flushed, messy, and smiling like idiots.
—----------------------------------------
That night, curled up in bed, Robby massaged your swollen feet as you sipped on tea and grumbled.
“It’s official. I’m going crazy.”
“You’re radiant.”
“I nearly tackled you in a closet.”
“And I’d let you do it again.”
You paused. “Seriously?”
“Seriously,” he said, brushing his thumb along the arch of your foot. “I’m the luckiest man alive. You’re growing a tiny version of us and somehow still make time to remind me I’m hot.”
You snorted. “You are hot. Infuriatingly so.”
Robby leaned in, kissed the side of your knee. “And you’re mine.”
“...Hey Michael?”
“Yeah?”
“Don’t wear that cologne to work tomorrow.”
“Why?”
“Because I’d really like to keep my job. And I’m not sure I’ll be able to control myself.”
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afsaana-e-ishq · 15 days ago
Text
Heavenly Saviour
Prince!Ghost x Female Knight!reader
A reverse Knight Au where the reader is a female knight and Ghost gets to be the pretty prince who gets rescued by her.
Masterlist
Warnings: MDNI, gore, blood, torture, trauma, love at first sight, pining if you squint.
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The dungeon was cold, dark and decrepit. The smell of mold and iron was suffocating Simon to no end. But he had no other choice but to breath in the rancid air. Thankfully the darkness shrouded his mangeled body. Hiding it from his own view for the time being. Regardless, the mutilated images persisted in his mind.
Simon heaved in the air that was collapsing in his lungs. They had left him hung and from his ribs, red crimson liquid pooling at his feet. The hook so meanly embedded into his tender flesh, he was no better than a pig hung after slaughter.
His captors weren’t kind enough to put him out of his misery. He wouldn’t be surprised if it was his father who had sold him to these people for some cheap entertainment.
Simon lets out a bloody cough while his mind races with the events that had landed him here. The kingdom was on the brink of collapse, The King, his father. The fucker more appropriately was probably hoarding as much of the nations wealth as he could right now. Nor him or his brother could do anything to curb these horrible serieres of events. They couldn't even protect their own mother.
He vowed if he got out of here alive he’d do anything in his power to save his people and his family from demise.
Low grunts escape from Simons mangled mouth. His muscles screamed from being pulled and stretched unnaturally. His vision blurry from the pain and stray tears. His pale body scarred beyond recognition was growing colder by the second. Red hot slashes decorated his supple flesh. But they did little to retain the heat. His breathing becoming laboured as he whispers his mother’s name thinking the end was nearing.
Head spinning, he looks to the ceiling. Dust dances down in sprinkles from the stomping up above. In his delirium, he hears distant screams followed by shouting. Is hellfire raining down? Heavy footsteps by the dozen clambered down like thunder over his head. Their boasterous movement rung out through the manor, vibrating down to the dungeon.
Had salvation finally come?
If he could he would have screamed and shouted until his vocal chords tore if it meant that someone would save him from this cold dark place. But he was fatigued and barely able to keep his head up. And for some reason the foot steps had died down and the screams felt like a distant echo now.
After a prolonged strech of silence, tears stain the eyes of the poor prince again. Were they gone? Had they left without him? If this truly was a hallucination he wishes to see his mother caressing his cheek before he passes. If he truly wasn’t forsaken, God would grant him this small favour before his dying breath.
Maybe it was all in his head after all. It was hard to tell if anything was real anymore. Maybe he was already dead and this was his purgatory.
His vision was stained crimson. All he could see was the congealed blood at his feet. The same blood that painted his skin an awful shade of red.
He heard heavy footsteps again but this time they were descending the dungeon stairs. A sound he would often dread.
When the crash finally comes, the door comes toppling down with a thud, he metal hinges clacking on the stone floor. Simons head wips up desperately as he forces his eyes to look at the broken entrance to the cellar, trying his best to figure out if it was a friend or foe.
There you stood, in all your glory. The candlelight coming from the lit staircase bounced off your armour, creating a celestial glow around you. The tears in his eyes caused the light to distort, making it look like the heavens had blessed his knight with golden wings.
He watched you walk towards him with confident steps. Your resolve, unwavering. Yet your expression was ghastly. Despite this, you soldier on with a bloody sword clutched in your hand.
Simon couldn’t quite make out your features; he was too delirious at this point from the blood loss. But you look like an angel to him; here to enact divine justice. Everything felt fuzzy and shapeless the closer you got. Like he was floating away. Like he was allowing himself to move from purgatory to heaven. All that was left was for his knight to take him there.
But that changed the second you touched his mutilated skin. You brought him crashing down to reality. Much like Icarus plummeting to his demise, the only difference was that you were here to catch him. Every nerve ending sprung alive to throw Simon back into the cycle of his never-ending pain. Your words are soft and soothing, a jarring contrast to the blood staining your face.
He wished he could make out more of your features properly. Wished he could burn your image into his mind forever. But fresh tears obstructed his view. Mangeled cries spill from his cut lips while you pry away the hook that’s lodged deeply between his ribs.
You lower his body to the ground as you tell him you’ve got him now. That you’ll take care of everything from here. He shows you a smile so kind and sweet you wondered how anyone had the heart to harm him. Though It didn’t matter anymore, they were all dead now. Laying in pools of their own blood where you had sliced them down like the animals they were. Rather, you would have treated animals with more respect that you had shown them. You watch the prince go in and out of consciousness as you tie rags to his most open wounds.
“Captain! King Price has sent word! The castle has been captured!" You glance back briefly before nodding for him to continue.
"All occupants were killed before the arrival of our army. Reports say the previous King went on a murder rampage before fleeing with a small entourage. Prince Simon wasn’t found among the dead bodies!”
"Understood", you refocus your energy on tending to the prince laying in your arms, making sure to use your body to hide his mutilated body. You take the handkerchief off on your arm as you go to tie it around the Simons face, making sure not to obstruct his ragged breathing in any way.
“Go now tell the King all noble houses have been dealt with…Prince Simon wasn’t found among any of the bodies”, the soldier leaves immediately at your words as you lift the Prince’s body in your arms. Ready to carry him to safety. You’ll report the truth to the King later. But there was no way you’d let your poor prince suffer any more humiliation than he had already experienced.
His brother and mother didn’t deserve to die the way they did. You couldn't protect them or the prince in time. But you'll dedicate your life to like trying to atone for your shortcomings.
You look down at your Prince, recalling the gentle smile he gave you before slipping into unconsciousness. His smile never changed, not even after all the torment he faced. Not even after trying to carve it out of him; no bruise or scar could ever take away from his radiance. Nit to your anyway.
This will be a new era for him. One in which you plan to be his sword. To be his shield, to be his…just his. He could use you however he sees fit. You will stand by him regardless; come hell or high water.
Copyright © by @afsaan-e-ishq. 2025. All Rights Reserved. Writing not permitted for reposting, transcription, translation, or to use with AI technologies.
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blamebrampton · 9 months ago
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Books talk to each other. Mostly because practically every writer is also a voracious reader, but also because books arise out of times and places and we share a lot of our worlds these days. So it’s unsurprising that several novels I have hugely enjoyed over the past few years share the theme of the antiheroine who is past all giving of the fucks. Naomi Novik’s powerful dark sorceress kept on her own tight leash in the Scholomance books was a joy to follow; Xiran Jay Zhao’s Iron Widow slashed her way into my heart and now Sarah Rees Brennan’s Long Live Evil has added to a list of beloved antiheroines that probably started for me with Becky Sharp in Vanity Fair.
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Coincidentally, when considering how to describe Long Live Evil without significant spoilers, I realised that it shared several major themes with Vanity Fair. Young woman unfairly treated by fate decides to embrace her slut era to survive a war zone – both very accurate and wildly inaccurate for both. LLE opens with main character Rae in a hospital bed, teasing her sister about a book series they both adore. Rae is taking refuge in the story they have shared over years because it is one of the few things they have left: she is losing her fight against cancer and has been losing parts of her life, family and memory as that fight has progressed.
My personal hospital experiences have all been to do with major traumas rather than illness, which I vastly prefer because if you don’t die in the first couple of days, you usually start mending and you can immediately make plans to make the best of whatever you’ve broken. Rees Brennan, however, famously wrote a very funny, very horrible, ‘Kids, you won’t believe what shenanigans your girl’s been up to now, it’s only stage four Hodgkins lymphoma!’ post on her Tumblr or LJ (someone who has been hit in the head with taxis fewer times than me will doubtless factcheck that in the notes) about seven or eight years ago and then faced the very serious business of trying to live. The hospital scenes are painfully authentic, as are the stories of people who have left Rae as she slipped further out of everyday life.
For Rees Brennan, a loving family and peer group were there to hold her as close as they could. For Rae, only her beloved little sister, Alice, and Time of Iron, their favourite fantasy series, remain. They read the books together, remember adventures cosplaying and watching the musical, they wonder about the final instalment; for Rae it’s a joy she can still share (even if she doesn’t remember as much as she should), for Alice, it’s her two greatest loves. When a strange woman offers a door into the world of the book and a possible magical cure to Rae, she wants it as much as she disbelieves it.
Stepping into Eyam, the land of Time of Iron, Rae finds herself in the body of a villain doomed to die the next day. No worries! She’s thought and fought her way out of worse scraps than this in her past as a head cheerleader, let alone while battling cancer. She can use her knowledge of the plot to change things! If only she remembered more of the books…
Portal fantasies are common enough, but not all play by the same rules. This isn’t Narnia, where the magical world is more real than our own, for Rae, the world of the book is nothing more a tool to get her hands on the cure. She doesn’t need to care about any of these people, they’re not real. Most of them speak in a formal language that relies on the conventions of fantasy literature (there is an ongoing, warm-hearted skewering of all Game of Thrones-esque texts running through both the story and the in-text ‘quotes’ from Time of Iron) and half the characters are known more by their descriptions rather than their names. So she will play the Beauty Dipped in Blood, with her questionable morals, impractical clothes and centre-of-balance-distorting boobs for the weeks that will pass until the cure is available. Whoever she has to shuffle in the plot to secure a place beside that cure, she will shuffle. While she’s not out to kill anyone, it’s not as though they were ever really alive. Not like her. If she has to be the villain to survive, she will be an impeccable one. The people will cheer evil on!
Obviously, little goes to plan. Rae’s illness has taught her cruelty, but she hasn’t forgotten what it is to be kind. Even as she manipulates her role into ongoing main character, she realises that’s not how anyone gets a happy ending. That’s not how she can live with herself. As she comes to think of the other people in the story as real, they become more so, both in how we read them and in how they impact the story. Rae remembers what it is like to make friends, which she never meant to, but, oh, the luxury after years of watching people slip away!
As in previous novel In Other Lands, Rees Brennan has a long list of fantasy tropes to embrace and undermine, and her deft touch with humour is as evident as ever here, but her publishers call this her first adult novel and there is a shift in tone from her previous works. Anger is more real and lasting. Consequences are more significant. Understanding is reached for, even if it’s bitter. One of my favourite things is that she lets her female characters rage, but never judges those who can’t, whether because they’re too powerless or just too tired, and her male characters are allowed to be people if they choose to be — which all but the most vainglorious do.
I hadn’t paid much attention beyond checking the release date for the book, so didn’t realise it was the first in a series. For me, it worked perfectly as a standalone novel, even with the unended threads, which would have perfectly balanced Rae’s unfinished life. That said, I am very happy to know we will spend more time with these characters in the future. I want more. I do want to know if there is a hope for Rae, if this is the fever dream of a fading life, if this is the story Alice has told to ease her sister from the world or something else. There are a dozen characters I hope for, at least three happy endings that would bring joy. But don’t wait for the next books: sink your teeth into this one and believe what it says about the importance of listening to stories rather than just falling in love with characters. Though if you find yourself cheering on Rae, or her servant Emer, the elusive Eric, Horrible Hortensia or almost any of the others, I am the last person who will judge you.
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