#Shit fuck I didn’t even realize I did this
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Blue Christmas
dark!Rafe Cameron x f!Reader
Warnings: noncon (rape), p in v sex, kidnapping, murder, drugging, stalking, obsessive behavior, possessive behavior, choking, unprotected sex, breeding kink, abusive behavior
A/N: this fic is directly inspired by the movie P2 (2007) but I changed a couple plot things to make it fit for Rafe. Hope you enjoy!
The click of your heels echoed throughout the large, empty parking garage. You let out a frigid puff of breath as you shivered, pulling your coat tighter around your shoulders as you looked for your car.
After the holiday party had died down, you had volunteered to stay late to finish up a report so you could have Christmas day off with your family. And now, a full hour and a half after everyone else left, you were finally about to be on your way home.
You reached into your purse to fish your keys out, clicking the unlock button to help you find your car.
Chirp chirp!
The sound came from the level above you and you let out a small groan as you began the walk up to the next level.
After spotting your car, you let yourself in, sliding into the seat and closing the door behind you.
You slid the key into the ignition and turned it, but instead of coming to life, your engine stuttered, refusing to start.
“Shit!” You cursed, slapping the steering wheel in frustration. “Fucking seriously?!”
All you wanted right now was to get home to see your family, but now it appeared your car might not even be leaving the garage.
You reached into your purse to pull your phone out, dialing your mom, but when no sound came over the speaker, you pulled the phone away from your ear to realize that you didn’t have any signal.
Realizing that your only options were to find the parking security guard or walking out into the cold air to get better signal, you decided that you needed to find the parking office.
However, before you could even open your door, you saw the lights on the opposite side of the garage begin to turn off, one by one, growing closer until you were swallowed by the darkness of the garage.
“I’m still in here!” You shouted, feeling freaked out by the dark.
But the sudden sharp knock against your window nearly stopped your heart.
A bright flashlight flicked on, pointed at your face like the person was trying to get a look at you.
He must have seen the fear in your eyes because the light lowered to the ground, revealing the parking security guard, and you let out a sigh of relief at the familiar face.
“Thank god it’s just you,” you joked nervously as you opened your car door to step out.
You looked up at the tall, blond man, remembering the many times he had let you in the parking garage or waved goodbye as you drove out. He was a shy and somewhat awkward guy, but he had been nice in all of your previous interactions.
Underneath the nerdy looking glasses, you might have even considered him handsome.
“I’m glad you’re still here so late, or I’d be in a lot of trouble,” you groaned, gesturing to your car. “It won’t start and I don’t have any signal in the garage.”
“Ah that h-happens here more than you’d think, I can help you out,” he grinned, taking a cursory glance at your car. “You could um- make a call from the office, if you wanted.”
“Oh that would be perfect! Thanks um… Ray?”
“Rafe,” he corrected you with a lopsided smile.
“Oh. Rafe, sorry,” you repeated. “My name is Y/N.”
“I know.”
“You do?” You tilted your head to the side in confusion as you looked up at him.
“You hand me your parking pass every day, remember? Everyone who works in the office does,” he smiled.
“Oh yeah, true,” you let out a small laugh.
“Did you enjoy th-the party?”
You blushed, smiling to yourself as you remembered your coworker, Jack, pulling you into one of the empty offices for a quick make out session. This was the first time the two of you had ever done something so risky at the office before, and it had been pretty thrilling.
“Yeah, it was nice. I’m ready to get home to my family though, they’re all waiting on me.”
“Then we better call you a taxi, huh?”
“Guess so.”
You followed him as he lead you to the parking office, and your eyes widened as you took in the sparkling Christmas lights that were wrapped around the small space.
“Did you do all of this decoration yourself, Rafe?”
“Uh yeah,” his lips curled into a shy smile and he scratched the back of his head nervously. “I don’t know, it just brightens the place up. Makes the job less depressing.”
“Oh yeah, I totally get it.” You sat down at the chair opposite from his desk, mindlessly glancing over at the monitor that was showing multiple grainy camera angles throughout the garage, cycling through all the cameras throughout the building.
You looked over at the corner of the office to see a large black dog curled up on a bed.
“So, here’s the office phone,” he passed the landline to you. “I’m gonna step out for a quick smoke, you can uh, call your family or a cab, or um whatever you need to do. I’ll be b-back in a couple minutes.”
“Okay! Thank you so much for your help!” You smiled, waving as he stepped out the front door of the office.
You dialed your mom’s number, holding the phone to your ear as you waited for her to pick up.
“Hello?” You could barely hear your mother’s voice over the sounds of children playing.
“Mom? It’s Y/N.”
“Where are you?? We’ve been waiting for an hour at this point sweetheart.”
“I’m sorry, I had a little extra work to do tonight so I could spend all of tomorrow with you. And you’ll never guess what happened when I left the office.”
“What?”
“My car wouldn’t start! So I’m waiting in the security office and I’m going to call a cab,” your mother started to interject, but you cut her off, “don’t wait up on me. I’ll get there soon hopefully, but with this weather it might take a bit for the cab to get here.”
Your mom was saying something about sending your aunt to pick you up, and you waved her off, but when your gaze landed on the monitor’s camera feed, your blood went cold and the ringing in your ears prevented you from hearing anything.
Your eyes widened as you watched Jack open the office door building on the camera feed, pulling you inside, leaving only a moment before his lips were on your neck, and his hands were trailing down your body.
Your stomach lurched when you heard yourself softly moan his name before his lips covered yours.
This video was from earlier tonight.
“Y/N?” Your mom asked and you realized you had gone silent.
“I-” your mouth felt dry, your mind was racing, but you knew you needed to call the cab as soon as possible. “I’m calling the cab now.”
You hung up quickly, looking behind you and around the now cramped feeling office for the security guard.
Would it be safe to leave the office? How would you find your way out quickly with the lights off?
He was nowhere in sight, so you dialed the number of the cab company, hand shaking as you held the phone to your ear and cursing when it kept ringing with no answer.
Finally after what felt like an eternity, someone picked up.
“Hello? Please, I need a cab at 9876 Main Street.”
“How many passengers?”
“Just one, please hurry,”
“We’ll be there in under 5 minutes.”
You let out a sigh of relief, you were finally going home.
However, you were shocked back into reality when a hand suddenly clamped over your mouth, pressing a damp rag over your nose and mouth.
You let out a muffled yelp, struggling against them, but the strong arm that wrapped around your chest held you firmly in place.
You had only taken three gasping breaths before the world around you grew fuzzy, and then your vision went black.
Your eyes cracked open slowly and you lifted your aching head to find yourself still inside the security guard’s office, laid out on the couch. A chill ran up your spine and your noticed your coat was missing.
Rafe was sitting at his desk with his back turned to you, watching the video of you and Jack on a loop.
You let out a soft whimper of fear, shifting to stand up and try to run out of the room, but you quickly realized your right wrist was handcuffed to the sofa when it dug into the skin of your wrist, pulling you back down onto the couch.
The clinking of the metal alerted Rafe to the fact that you were awake and he turned around, a sick grin spreading across his face.
“You’re up! Sorry about all that with the rag and stuff,” he chuckled, acting as if it was some run of the mill accident.
His casual ease as he looked over you sent a chill down your spine.
You didn’t miss the fact that his large dog was awake now, sitting beside him and staring you down imposingly.
“Also, I um- I cancelled your cab,” he told you and your heart skipped a beat.
“W-why?”
“Well… I thought maybe you’d want to spend your Christmas Eve with me,” Rafe nervously offered.
You blinked at him in shock, at a complete loss for words.
“W-we could get to know each other, and finally have our first date.” Rafe stood up from the chair and approached you, and you shrank away from him.
“Listen, Rafe..” you swallowed dryly, heart hammering against your chest as you carefully chose your words, “I- I’m sure you’re a really nice guy, but I’m already seeing somebody.”
There was a deadly silence at your words and Rafe’s eyes narrowed, his jaw tightening in a way that made you nervous.
His dog noticed the subtle change in his attitude, a low growl building at the back of its throat and he slowly started to walk towards you.
“Easy Max,” Rafe warned, his tone cold and mocking. “Don’t wanna scare poor Y/N too much.”
The dog backed off at that, laying down in his bed, but still eyeing you suspiciously.
Rafe sat beside you on the couch, one arm wrapping around your waist and you shuddered at the physical contact.
“Listen, Y/N, just give me a chance okay? Why don’t you tell me a bit about yourself?”
“I-” you stuttered nervously, your mind too blank with fear to know what to say. “I have t-two siblings.”
You tripped over your words, face warming up when you felt his hand slowly begin to trace up your back.
“Keep going,” he ordered with a whisper, his hand rising to the rest at the back of your neck. Your pulse was racing and your breath was beginning to grow uneven with tension.
“I’m f-from a town 40 minutes from here. I’ve never ah-” you winced when his fingers flexed slightly, putting you even more on edge. “I’ve never lived outside of the state.”
“Really? That’s incredible. Me personally, I’m from North Carolina, but I’ve traveled all over the world.”
His eyes flicked from your face to your chest, eyeing the way your breath was coming quickly. He grinned wickedly, drawing so close you could feel his breath against your cheek.
“Am I making you nervous, Y/N?”
He adjusted his hand, wrapping his thumb and pointer finger around the back of your neck while his other fingers splayed down your spine, and you let out a shaky breath.
“Would you feel more at ease if I was Jack?” Rafe spat his name out like it was poison in his mouth and you winced.
“N-no. I- I don’t- no,” you whimpered, not sure what he wanted to hear from you.
This night had taken a turn that you never expected and your head was still spinning as you tried to come to terms with what was happening.
Rafe let out an annoyed huff, a scowl blooming across his face as he stared at you.
“Do you want to see him again tonight?”
“What?”
“I said, do you want to see him again tonight?”
“I-” you stuttered, but you trailed off, not knowing what he meant or how to answer.
Rafe rolled his eyes, clearly growing irritated by your indecisiveness. He turned to find something on his desk before returning to you with a key in one hand and a small knife in the other.
Your eyes widened at the sight of the knife, your breathing picking up as you looked to him in fear.
“What-?”
“I’m going to unlock you and we’re going to take a short drive, but I can’t have you getting any smart ideas, sweetheart.” Rafe grabbed your cuffed wrist, jamming the key into the lock on the cuff that was attached to the sofa.
He grabbed your wrist tightly with one hand, pulling you off the couch and turning you away from him before reaching over your shoulder and bringing the knife to your throat.
He leaned forward, letting his lips come to your ear and you held back a shudder as he spoke, “if you so much as think about trying to get away from me, I won’t hesitate to kill you, do you understand?”
You nodded, choking down your tears as he pushed you forward to signal you to walk out of the office.
Rafe led you to a car, opened the door, and shoved you inside, giving you a warning glare to not run before walking around to the driver’s side.
“W-where are we going?” You asked as he started the car and backed out of the parking space.
“You’ll see, sweetheart.”
He turned towards the exit of the garage, and for a moment you could feel your escape within your grasp, but he steered away, instead steering towards the ramp that led to the lower levels of the garage.
“W-we’re not leaving?” You could feel your heartbeat pick up again in your confusion. Where the fuck was he taking you?
“We’re almost there, Y/N, calm down.”
Your eyes scanned the dark garage, but they widened when he turned the corner, his headlights revealing Jack duck taped to one of the office chairs.
“Oh my god,” you whispered in shock, taking in the blood that was already dripping from his forehead. Jack shifted in the chair, his eyes squinting as he tried to look through the windshield.
“What’s going on Rafe?? Why are you doing this?” You hissed through tears, frantically looking back and forth between Rafe and Jack.
He chuckled, but it lacked humor and you felt nauseous at the sound.
“Don’t you get it, Y/N?” His hand came to your cheek, forcing you to meet his gaze. “I love you so much, and he’s what’s keeping us apart.”
Now you were almost certain you were going to be sick and you let out a sob as his thumb lightly traced your face.
“I- I don’t even know you, Rafe! I barely knew your name before tonight,” you cried hysterically, begging him to find reason. “Please, whatever you’re planning, just stop!”
You couldn’t stop the burning tears from falling now, anxiety making your heart beat so fast you felt dizzy.
“Shh Y/N, calm down.” He wiped away some of your tears with his thumb. His blue eyes watched you with concern, but there was a coldness underneath the surface that frightened you.
“I’m gonna take care of it, okay? And he’s never going to come between us again.”
Before you could question him, he closed the gap between you, holding you in place as his lips covered yours.
Your eyes shot open in surprise, stomach turning in disgust as you squirmed against him, and you whimpered when he forced his tongue into your mouth. His lips felt hot against yours and the kiss lasted too long, as Rafe held you down against the chair by your throat until you were gasping for breath.
He pulled away with a dreamy look in his eyes as he scanned your distressed expression.
“Do not try to run. Got it?”
You stared at him blankly, taking a beat too long to respond and his hand tightened around your throat.
“Got it?” He repeated with a sickening edge to his voice.
“Mm, mm hm,” you nodded, mouth too dry to make any noises other than humming yes.
“Good girl,” he purred, leaning forward to press one last kiss to your trembling cheek before reaching over to open his door and climb out.
You were glued to your seat, too scared to attempt running with him still so close. You could barely watch as he approached Jack with the knife brandished in his hand.
“Please- stop it! Don’t get any closer!” Jack cried out and your heart skipped a beat, more tears sliding down your face was you watched with horror.
“You were never good enough for Y/N, you know that?” You could hear the rage in Rafe’s voice simmering beneath the surface, ready to be released.
“Always taking her for granted and treating her like she’s some everyday slut.” He spat, pulling his arm back before punching James hard across the jaw.
You stifled your cry by biting your lip, trying to ignore Jack’s groans of pain when Rafe punched him again.
“Rafe, stop it!” You cried from inside the car and he turned around to look at you before punching him in the stomach with a grin.
“She may not understand what kinds of tricks you’re pulling, but I do.” He slammed his fist into James’ gut again. “I know guys like you, who get off on playing nice girls like Y/N and treating them like shit.”
“No- I’m not-” Jack grunted, blood trickling past his lips as he struggled to breathe. He strained against the layers of duck tape wrapped around his chest and the back of the chair to no avail.
“And I’m sure you look down on the guys like me. You think you’re so much better because you went to college and got a comfy, corporate job, and assholes like you always get the girl in the end,” Rafe’s voice was downright venomous at this point, and you could tell that he was working himself up to a boiling point.
“Not this time,” he chuckled darkly, bringing the knife to Jack’s throat threateningly.
“Rafe please!” You screamed, tears flowing down your cheeks as you watched the scene before you unfold, feeling utterly powerless.
In one smooth motion, Rafe brought the knife across Jack’s throat and a river of crimson sprayed from his neck, splattering across Rafe’s face and clothes.
You sobbed as Jack slumped against the chair, his head leaning back to reveal the large cut splayed across his throat, and you knew in your heart that he was dead.
Before you could think twice, your hand was wrapped around the door handle, and you pushed yourself out of the car.
The garage was almost pitch black, save for Rafe’s headlights and you didn’t notice the cement wedge in front of you.
“Shit-!” You cursed as you hit the ground, adrenaline too high to register any pain from the fall.
You turned your head as you scrambled to your feet to find Rafe’s angry gaze fixed in your direction. Heart pounding, you stumbled to your feet and took off towards where you remembered him turning from the ramp to the upper levels, the sounds of your heels echoing off the walls of the parking garage.
“Fuck!” You heard Rafe roar from behind you followed by the sound of him hitting something hard in frustration, likely his car, before you heard his heavy footsteps chasing after you.
“Y/N!!” He yelled, his voice reverberating and repeating as he cursed.
Knowing that this was likely your only chance to escape, you frantically looked around for an exit once you got onto the ground floor, only to find that it was gated off, and there was no way for you to leave.
When you passed a second exit that was gated off, you realized Rafe must have closed them all down to keep you inside and your heart fell.
“Where are you hiding?” Rafe’s voice sent a shiver down your spine, and you could tell he was getting closer.
If you were going to escape, you weren’t going to be able to do it alone.
You could hear his footsteps getting closer behind you in the dark, and you tried to quiet your shaky breath as you ran to the brightly lit office, hiding behind the support pillars along the way.
Even if he caught you in the office, if you could just make a call to the police, hopefully that would be enough to save you.
You finally reached the front, pushing the door open slowly and quietly before crouching and entering.
Unfortunately, in your panic to get away, you had forgotten all about Rafe’s large dog, and you nearly jumped out of your skin when he ran up to you, barking and lunging, only to be yanked back by his chain at the last moment before reaching you.
Your heart rate spiked as the dog growled loudly in between sharp ruffs, barring his teeth and trying to nip at you.
“Shhh!” You whispered. “Good doggie, please be quiet!”
You eased past the dog and towards the landline, trying to stop the uncontrollable shaking in your knees as Max continued to bark.
Images of Jack’s throat being slit flashed through your mind and you choked back a sob as you reached for the phone.
Your sweaty fingers slid over the numbers and you held the phone up to your ear waiting for the ring.
But it never came.
You pulled the phone away from your ear in confusion, and looked down at the handset, following the wire connected to the phone to where it should have been plugged into the wall.
Instead, you stared at the severed wire in terror, realizing that Rafe must have cut it while you were knocked out earlier.
“Why are you trying to ruin our first date?”
Rafe’s voice from behind washed over you like a bucket of cold water, and you slowly turned around to find him standing in the doorway of the office.
He was an imposing figure, made all the more terrifying due to the flecks of blood painted across his face and shirt. His glasses were gone now, and you realized just how much they had been hiding the threatening glint in his eyes.
Rafe no longer seemed like the shy, nerdy guy you had taken him for before tonight, but instead a dangerous predator who had finally cornered his prey.
“Rafe,” your voice was so faint you weren’t sure if you were even speaking. “Please, I’m scared.”
Your throat felt tight, tears filling your eyes when you noticed the blood on his hands.
“Scared?” He asked incredulously. “You should be thanking me for getting that loser out of our way.”
A sob clawed its way out of your throat, and you took a step back, only to jump forward again when the dog’s low growl came from behind you.
“Now it’s time to stop running,” Rafe taunted.
You felt dizzy with fear as you watched him step closer, towering above you, the outline of his muscular form barely hidden by his leather jacket.
Heart beating loudly against your chest and blood rushing in your ears, you didn’t have any time to think your decision through before acting.
You rushed forward, trying to push past him to get to the front door, but you were a moment too slow.
Rafe’s strong arms wrapped around your waist, easily picking you up and spinning you away from the door.
You cried out as he carried you forward, pushing you against the table in the middle of the room and bending you over it.
“Stop it-!” You screamed as you struggled against him, but he easily pinned you against the hard wood, letting out a wicked snicker as he roughly pushed the skirt of your dress up.
“Don’t you want someone to take of you, baby?” The blond groaned desperately, fingers grasping at your tights before ripping them open.
“I just wanted to treat you nice, Y/N.” He growled, anger radiating off his tongue. “Like the good girl I thought you were.”
You wretched your arm free before bending your elbow and thrusting it into Rafe’s stomach.
He cursed loudly, his grip on you loosening for just a moment before his hand clamped down around your wrist, painfully twisting it behind your back and harshly forcing you against the table. When you heard his belt jingling behind you, your heart skipped a beat.
“Looks like I was wrong.” Rafe spat, and you whimpered in fear as he pulled your panties to the side. “Maybe you are a fucking slut.”
“Rafe please, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. Please don’t do this, Rafe,” you were quaking beneath him, crying harder as your pleas fell on deaf ears.
You froze however, voice dying in your throat when you felt the tip of his cock run along your folds.
“Oh god,” he strained, and you squirmed beneath him, cringing when his lips came to your ear.
“You’re so wet you’re dripping down your fucking thighs, sweetheart,” he taunted, barely shifting his hips forward and spreading your lips with his dick.
You sucked in a shaky breath, legs growing weak underneath you. You fisted the hand pinned against your back until your knuckles grew pale. His fingertips brushed your clit as he languidly dragged his tip along your pussy, up near your ass, then down to your clit. Up, down, languid strokes as he hissed through his teeth.
"Bet Jack wouldn't ever get you this wet, huh?"
Jack’s lifeless body flashed before your closed eyelids again, quickly replaced by the sharp sting of Rafe's fingers clamping your clit, rolling his slick-covered digits over your nerves. An instinctual whine left your lips, and Rafe sneered down at you as he dragged his dick back up to your hole, circling the head around your entrance as you protested.
"Rafe, please, please," you cried into the table, clenching your knees together and tilting your hips from him, anything to get him to pull away.
“Fucking stay still!” He hissed, wrapping his thick bicep around your throat in frustration. You let out a choked whine, tears coming to your eyes when his muscles flexed, cutting off your breathing, and Rafe ignored you as you helplessly scratched at his arm.
He groaned as he pushed into your cunt, his tip nearly sliding all the way inside of you, met with resistance that only fueled him further. Your pleas were lost to the heat that blushed Rafe's face.
"Fuck, sweetheart, you been holding this back from me?" He dragged himself out of you, watching as you clenched and quivered from the sudden withdrawl. Again, he pushed his flushed head into your warmth, and then out, in slow teasing strokes that made your head spin.
Against every survival instinct that was screaming at you, you stopped fighting. Each sting of his dick breaching you, each wet squelch of his fat tip inside you left you feeling dizzy with want.
However, when you felt his cock inch deeper inside, you whined in protest and squirmed in his arms, but one flex of the bicep at your throat quelled your resistance quickly.
“You’re so pretty, you know that, Y/N?”
You shuddered as Rafe groaned against your ear, his arm locked around your neck and preventing you from turning away. Your knees shook beneath you as he slowly forced himself deeper, and you felt betrayed by your body when you felt yourself growing slicker around him.
“Too pretty to be trapped in this shitty office job, wasting your hours at work, if you ask me,” he purred.
His fingers found your clit again, thumb rolling over your sensitive bud, and you bit back a moan as your back arched instinctively, allowing Rafe to dip deeper inside.
He was much bigger than you expected, stretching you out with each thrust, and pushing himself deeper and deeper until his tip kissed your cervix.
The blond wasn’t holding back anymore, reveling in every mewl and whimper he could draw out of you; and the way your snug walls clenched around his length had his hips snapping against your ass as he chased his release.
“Don’t you want a family to care for, baby?” He groaned, fingers swirling over your clit and you whined, trying to squeeze your legs shut in a desperate attempt to stop him.
His words echoed in your head, the sick irony completely lost on him.
You already had a family and he was holding you hostage to keep you away from them.
“We could start our own, together,” he whispered, and a muffled sob escaped your lips. When you squirmed beneath him, he easily held you in place, punishing you with quick, painful thrusts.
“You’ll never have to worry about working again,” he groaned when your tight walls squeezed around him. “Just- fuck- stay at home ‘n be my pretty, little housewife.”
Disgust and terror bloomed in your gut as you realized with a shock just how twisted his fantasies were. You felt sick thinking about how long his obsession had been festering beneath the surface and you had been too blind to see.
Rafe pinched your clit between two fingers and you whined, tears running down your cheeks as he forced your legs open again. You tensed around him, letting out a choked moan when he rolled his thumb over your tender clit.
You hated him, but even worse, you hated how much control he had over your body, and how painfully delicious each stroke of his cock felt.
“Please-” you whimpered, not entirely sure if you were begging him to stop or keep going, twisted desire clouding your head as he plunged into you again and again, the sticky sounds of your slick cunt filling the cramped room.
Rafe groaned, easing his hold on your neck to lean forward and trail messy kisses from your cheek to the side of your throat that was exposed, never slowing his pace or the steady circles around your clit. Nausea churned in your gut at the overly intimate gesture; and when the scent of copper reached you, you realized he had smeared some of Jack’s blood onto your cheek.
You gasped loudly when his lips attached to your neck, nipping and sucking at the sensitive skin. Rafe’s low grunts vibrated against your throat when you squeezed down around him.
Your body rocked with every thrust of his hips, your knees quaking beneath you as his thumb circled around your clit faster now.
“Rafe-” your breath hitched and you shamefully realized that your undoing was hurdling towards you.
“That’s it sweetheart,” he hissed through clenched teeth, his bicep flexing around your throat as he lost himself in his pace, plunging into you again and again.
You let out a choked whine when his thumb pressed harder against your tender bud, and you were finally pushed over the edge.
Your body tensed, legs shaking as your slick walls spasmed around him. You squeezed your eyes shut as the waves of pleasure crashed over you, whimpering pathetically as Rafe pushed his cock into you again and again.
He snickered as you cried beneath him, reveling in the way you helplessly scratched at his arms, tearfully begging him to stop.
The blond slammed into you harder, each slap of his balls against your sensitive clit made your head spin and it wasn’t long before you were coming around him again.
You trembled beneath him, so dazed that you could only whimper mindless pleas.
“Fuck-” Rafe’s breath caught in his throat as you squeezed around him, his pace stuttered, and the arm at your throat tightened as he grew closer.
You could barely breathe now, and you struggled against him as he choked you, panic overtaking you when your vision grew fuzzy around the edges.
Rafe groaned loudly when he came, forcing his cock deep inside you and painting your walls with his hot, sticky seed.
You shuddered when he nudged himself deeper and you felt his thick cum overflowing past your sensitive, puffy lips. Out of instinct, you tensed beneath him, and he moaned against your ear when you tightened around his softening cock.
After what felt like forever, he finally pulled out, loosening his hold on you, although you couldn’t have fought back now even if you tried.
You heard him pulling his pants up behind you, and you flinched when his hands came to your back to pull your skirt down to cover you.
“C’mere honey,” he cooed, carefully lifting you off the table and guiding you to the couch. You obeyed him, much too out of it to put up any more resistance.
You cringed in pain as you sat down, but tried to make yourself as comfortable as you could.
Rafe’s hand was on your back, lightly drawing small circles on your exposed skin, and you found it nauseating that he could be so gentle after treating you so savagely.
He was staring at you, studying your nervous face for a few moments before reaching out to cup your cheek.
You flinched, turning away slightly as he drew closer, but his grip was firm, and he held you in place as he leaned in and draped his lips over yours.
Your stomach turned as his lips slid over yours possessively, and you let out a squeak of surprise when he pushed his tongue into your mouth, groaning as he staked his claim on you.
When he finally pulled away, your head was swimming, and the dazed look in your eye made Rafe smirk.
“Aw look at you, never seen you so cock drunk before,” he chuckled, before leaning in to give you another quick peck on the lips.
“You gave me the best Christmas gift I could ask for.” He grabbed one of your hands, wrapping his fingers around it and squeezing gently. “I’ll take care of you Y/N.”
You stared at him blankly, a tear rolling down your cheek that Rafe chose to ignore as he looked deep into your eyes.
“I love you, and I promise, I’m never leaving your side again.”
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You Talk Too Much
dom!Terry! Terry Richmond x Black!Female Reader
Warnings: MDNI! this story is 18+!, Smut, a hint of BDSM, breeding kink, creampie, dirty talk, degradation, oral (male receiving), P in V, solo masturbation, usage of b-word! Drug use, alcohol use.
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You honestly didn’t expect your legs to be hooked over this man’s shoulders as he consistently dug into your depths. His eyes staring into your soul as whimpers came from your lips. Tonight was supposed to be a good night with laughter, drinks flowing, dancing, ect. So how did you exactly end up in this position? Well you’re mouth got you in it in the first place.
Earlier that night
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
You and Terry went out with a couple friends you’ve known since moving into town. At least all of you guys were in relationships so why not make it a couples night. As you all made your way into the bar, the drinks began to pour. Your friends and you made it to the bar and began chatting.
“Girl how you manage to get Terry ass out the house?” Shay asked.
“No, for real because he doesn’t even come out like that!” Your other friend, Anissa, replied.
You chuckled.
“Y’all I honestly had to bribe him with some head to get him to come”
The two ladies looked at each other and snickered.
“Well I be damned bitch!” Shay laughed.
As y’all ordered another round of shots, you kept catching glances at Terry who was surrounded by his own homeboys. The cloud of smoke circling him as he took a puff from the blunt he was smoking. If you weren’t in a room full of people and in public, you would’ve sat your pussy on his face right then and there. He looked so sexy inhaling that smoke and letting it back out.
Your friends snapped you out of your hornified trance. Shay and Anissa asked you a very interesting question. “How is Terry in the bedroom” they both said. Your eyes went wide, but you quickly regained yourself. You smirked. “A fucking animal”, you replied back.
“Details bitch, we need details.” said Anissa
Knowing that Terry isn’t for his business being out and the open, even if it’s you telling your friends, you begin rambling on about how dominant and controlling he is.
As you went on and on, you didn’t even notice Terry creeping up on you three. He heard every single word came out of your mouth. As he came and stood behind you, Shay and Anissa’s facial expressions changed and you caught wind of that. You asked what was wrong and the only thing they could do was nudge their heads forward towards you, indicating someone was behind you. You slowly turned around only to be meet with a pair of hazel eyes.
Terry stood there with one of his eyebrows raised and him looked down at you. Your body instantly grew hot and your panties became moist.
“Baby, I thought you were with the-”
Terry cut you off mid sentence.
“Save that shit, what was said babygirl?” He came close, almost pressing his built body against yours.
“N-Nothing.”
“I heard every word you said, now I’ma need for you to go be a good girl and go wait by the car. We got some talking to do.”
Without hesitation, you grabbed your purse and sprinted to the car, you didn’t even say bye to your friends. Stay and Anissa looked at each other and muttered “Oooh”.
As you stood at the car, you seen Terry exiting the building. He unlocked the doors and you got in the front seat as he got in the driver’s seat. He started the car and drove off. He keep his gaze forward as he drove and occasionally gave you the side eye. After what seemed minutes of silence you started talking.
“Baby, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize I was talk-”
“Did I say you could speak? You’ve done enough of that tonight, but I got something for that tho.”
If you could, you would’ve melted into the car seat.
“Matter fact, lift that dress up and slide them panties to the side and play with that puss.”
“Terry..”
“Now, I ain’t asking you, I’m telling you.” He gripped your inner thigh and pulled them apart.
You lifted from the seat a little allowing your dress to rise and you pulled your panties to where he wanted them. You took your thumb and begin rubbing your clit in slow circles, while your index and ring finger slipped inside of you.
“You better not moan or cum either, I’ma teach yo’ ass.”
Your juices flowed out of your hole like a waterfall as you bit your lip to keep from making a sound. Terry looked at you and back and the road, then at the mess you were creating.
“She wet as fuck, mama. That pussy wet for me?”
You didn’t answer.
“Answer me when I’m talking to you.”
“Yes.”
“Yes, what?” Terry demanded.
“Yes, Daddy.”
You felt your orgasm coming and you began fingering your bundle of nerves faster, Terry noticed this and snatched your hand away.
“I said not to fucking cum!” He barked as you sighed.
Minutes later, he pulled into you two shared home. He cut the car and grabbed your face, turning it to him.
“You got 1 minute to be in the room, naked, and in the assumed position. Don’t make me repeat myself.”
You scrambled out the car into the house damn near tripping up the stairs as you discarded your clothes. Terry walked in a little bit while after and came upstairs to the bedroom to find you on your knees.
“Such a pretty bitch and good girl for me.” He roughly grabbed your chin making you look up at him.
He rubbed your lips with his thumb as he began shredding his clothes. There he stood in all his glory, those ripped abs, strong arms with prominent veins popping out. Your eye’s traveled down further and they stopped at his thick, long dick.
He then tied your arms behind you.
“I want all mouth mamas, no fucking hands.”
“Gotta put this mouth you got to good use for a mouthy bitch like you. Open up.”
You opened your mouth and he leaned down to spit directly in yours. He tapped his dick on your tongue and he notches the broad head past your lips, groaning at the exquisite sensation of your tongue lapping at the sensitive underside. Slowly, inch by thick inch, Terry feeds more of his impressive length into the wet heat of your mouth, careful not to overwhelm you. You slightly gagged a little when you felt his tip touch the back of your throat.
“Nah, we ain’t doing that shit. Take it.” He gritted through his teeth.
Terry fucked your mouth as if you were a human fleshlight. You felt his saliva combing with yours and you took him deeper than you could possibly imagine. Spit pooled around your mouth and dripped onto your chest.
“Fuck, just like that.”, he praises breathlessly, his grip tightening slightly in your hair. “Take it deeper, gorgeous. Show me how well you can suck this big dick.” He grunted.
“Suck my fucking dick, just like that slut.”
“You such a nasty girl for Daddy and I love that.”
Terry felt is nut coming and held your head down as he released in your mouth.
“FUCKKKK!” He slipped out of your mouth.
“Swallow it.”
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Now here you are, legs over his shoulders as he gave you long deep strokes of absolute pleasure.
“Mhmm, fuck Daddy I can’t. It’s too much.” You moaned as you tried to pry him away from you. He snatched your arms away and hooked them over your head.
“You don’t ever tell me what you can’t do. You take what the fuck I give you.”
You were so out of it at this point, the only thing you cared about was cumming. Terry didn’t slow down on his thrusts either. This man was literally bringing you to oblivion and back. He lets your legs down and spread them back with both of his big hands, to the point they were touching your cheeks. You could feel his tip poking at your cervix and he pushed his on your lower abdomen, causing you to scream out.
“Daddy, please! Let me cum! I’ll be a good girl and I won’t open my mouth anymore.” You barely got out as your voice was going horse.
“I know you won’t, not after I’m done breaking ya lil’ ass in.”
Terry focuses his attentions on your clit, circling the sensitive bud with his thumb as your legs quake and shake. He hums in satisfaction, the pleasure coursing through both of your veins.
“Look at her, she just drippin’ all on these sheets. Creamy pretty ass pussy.”
He grabbed your face and made you look down at the mess you were creating all over his shaft. A thick white ring of cream that coated him and leaked on the bed.
You could feel your orgasm coming and he knew it.
“You wanna cum for me, don’t you?”
“Yessss, Daddy can I please cum?” You begged him.
“Wet that fat dick up baby, it’s yours.”
Your body shook uncontrollably as you came. Terry’s thrust grew sloppier but he pulled out and flipped you on all fours. He rubbed his tip against your wet folds, teasing you with it by pushing it in but not all the way. He spanked your ass until it was red and you had tears in your eyes.
“Daddy fuck me!” You screamed.
“Greedy fucking bitch!” Without warning, Terry lines up his rehardened cock and slams forward, burying himself to the hilt inside your tight heat in one powerful thrust. A low groan tears from his throat at the exquisite sensation of your walls clenching around him. “FUUCKK!”
The obscene slap of skin on skin echoes through the room as Terry takes you hard and fast, his heavy balls slapping against your clit with each forceful thrust. One large hand snakes around to roughly palm your bouncing tits while the other grips your hip, holding you steady for his relentless assault.
“Ouu fuck me! Fuck me with that big dick baby!”
Terry snarls in feral approval at your shameless begging, doubling his efforts to pound into your sopping pussy with animalistic fervor. The headboard slams against the wall with each brutal thrust, the entire bed shaking from the force of his passion.
Releasing your hip, Terry brings his hand down in a stinging slap to your jiggling ass cheek before reaching around to furiously rub tight circles over your aching clit. The dual stimulation proves too much, sending shockwaves of ecstasy rippling through your core.
“Cum on this dick, now!”
Your orgasm ripples through you like a tsunami.
“I’m finna nut in this pretty puss. Knock yo’ ass up! Make you round with my baby.”
“Cum in me big daddy! Please, I want your babies! UGHHH!”
With a guttural moan, Terry hilts himself one final time, grinding against your cervix as his dick throbs and pulses inside you. He buries his face between your shoulder blades, panting heavily as he rides out the intense waves of his release.
“Shit, fuck... so fucking good.” He grunts, hips twitching with the aftershocks of his climax. Terry pulls out, his softening member slipping free with a gush of combined fluids. He strokes himself a few times, aiming his tip away from your body as the last spurts of cum paint your lower back and ass.
“Next time, don’t open your mouth so damn much.”
A/N: this was my first time writing so go easy on me yall 😭.
@dxddykenn @writingsbytee @beenathembo @prettyisasprettydoes1306 @jimmybutlrr @theogbadbitch @kaylaahisthebestest- @theblacklewinsky @vivaalenaa @theereina @peachbuttetfly @callme-lover @pocketsizedpanther @nayaesworld @kimuzostar @episodes-ff @hxneyclouds @planetblaque @lrryss-vghn @luuvprincess
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the morning after luigi mangione x reader (18+)
summary!!! part two of is it new years yet because you do not get back together just cuz he has good dick OMG 🖕🖕🖕🖕😒 he also has a great personality and loves eating pussy
warnings: smut, kinda angsty, he’s manipulative but honestly he’s such a nice guy, you should really give him a second chance
^ not edited let’s alll just practice gratitude 🙏
seven days, thirteen hours, and nine minutes and thirty six seconds.
that’s how long it had been since luigi had seen you. not that he’d been counting, he was truly trying to be normal about the distance this time around.
he replays the morning after on a loop, searching for the slightest hint he’d done something wrong to no avail. as a matter of fact, your quiet body was beside him until deep into the afternoon, nothing but soft snores exchanged between the two of you. he wakes before you, kissing your forehead before taking his leave. his frat brothers whistle at him as he enters the wretchedly messy house, throwing him a water.
“happy new year, big guy,” one of them, hasan, greets. “did’ya spend your night thinking about new goals or scoring the same one?”
luigi rolls his eyes. “fuck off.”
another brother chimes in, bright-eyed. “when are we meeting her?”
“in your dreams.”
he had no intention of sharing you in any way; the thought of anyone else even looking at you irritated him. but starting the new year off by your side was far too great a fate to be stoic about. he grabs a plate of what’s left of their shitty communal breakfast (jar salsa from the night before, scrambled eggs, and two pieces of mostly burnt toast) and brings it into your room.
“y/n,” he calls out while entering. the door to the bathroom is now closed, and he sees your shadow shuffling around the room.
hesitant, the door creaks open. youre back in your black minidress, holding onto your heels. “hey, pretty.”
“hi,” you say tightly, the mistakes and soreness from the night before lingering in your mind. you’ve just wiped away the tears still streaked on your face, yet your ex-boyfriend hardly looks hungover.
“dressed up just for me?” he jokes, kissing your cheek. he offers you the plate of food but you shake your head.
“lacy’s waiting for me. i’ve got to go.”
“stay,” he says, his voice honey-sweet, like the boyfriend you knew months ago. it makes you feel sick, the familiarity of it all suffocating you. the room feels too small.
you push away from him. “i have to go.”
“baby,” he drops everything he’s holding to grab you again. “what’s wrong? is everything alright?”
he always blows your mind with his audacity. “no, everything’s not alright, luigi,” you spit back. “we shouldn’t have—none of that should’ve happened.”
“what do you mean?”
“luigi,” you sigh. “we’re over, alright? it’s done.”
“y/n—”
“i mean it,” you raise your voice so slightly, but still it breaks. “you cheated on me, then pulled all this shit, i can’t do it anymore.”
“you can’t do it anymore? are you serious?”
“yes!”
“you ignored me for weeks then showed up at my fucking party, dressed like that,” his voice was low, but angry. brows furrowed, he doesn’t lose his grip on you. it scares you. “you can’t tell me you weren’t bartering for my attention.”
“i wasn’t.”
his jaw sets. “then who’s?”
“oh my god. nobody’s!”
“don’t fucking lie to me—”
“lu, stop, seriously.” your voice trembles this time, and you both notice it. he drops your hand.
“i didnt mean to hurt you,” he says, soft at your upset. “i swear—i dont remember cheating on you. i’m not gonna mess up like that again, i promise.”
he leans in to kiss you, to seal the pledge with his gentle touch, but you pull back. “it doesn’t matter that you didn’t mean to hurt me—you did. you can’t just pretend it didn’t happen.“
his big brown eyes bear into yours and he swears, “i can make it up to you.”
“luigi,” you hadn’t even realized you’d been crying until he brings his hands up to wipe your tears away. “i just don’t think this is a good idea, i’m sorry.”
“come on,” he says, frowning. “i love you. only you.” his lean-in to kiss you is successful this time. the kiss feels much better—softer—than last night’s. he’s gentle with his desperation, intent on making you stay. “‘m sorry, okay?” he says between kisses. “let me make it better.”
“no, luigi, we shouldn’t—”
“you’ve got to hear me out, y/n,” he takes your lips again. his hot kisses move down your neck—and it all feels so different this time around. even the air in the room feels lighter. his voice is against your ear when he swears, “i’ll be good to you, sweetheart, i promise.”
saying no to him is near impossible—it’s why you shut yourself off of him for weeks, avoiding places he frequented, deactivating your social media, ignoring his constant stream of messages and calls. now, he has you, and within minutes, you’re pressed against the wall again.
“feels good?” he teases, grinding his hard-on into your core. you melt underneath him, you can’t help it, he’s so warm.
“lu,” you whimper. you’re still sensitive from how selfishly he took you the night before, you can’t help but react to his touch so quickly. it felt so raw.
“wait—” he never does. his hands are on your hips again, moving your body against his.
“just let me take care of you,” he says, trailing kisses down your neck again. this time, he was sure to leave marks.
he keeps the dress on this time. he places you back onto the bed, and as you gather the courage to take him in again, he moves beneath you.
“knew i recognized these,” his voice hot against the fabric of your panties.
you told yourself the lacy black panties were just meant to match the dress, but it all seemed so intentional—the party crash, the kitchen drive-by, the fact that you were wearing his valentines day gift. whether this was a manifestation of your greatest fear or desire, you couldn’t tell.
he kisses your thighs, then runs his tongue against your core through the fabric of your panties before ceremoniously ripping them off. he kisses and sucks at your wetness. you tremble at the suddenness of his movement. his big nose is so prominent in your pussy, you can’t help but grind yourself against his perfect face and whine as he drinks you in.
“you’re such a fucking mess,” luigi says, smiling into your warmth. his unshaven stubble tickles your sensitive cunt, sending a tremor through you. “so wet, i’ve barely even touched you.”
“i can’t help it,” you whimper.
he grabs your ass, pulling you closer to his relentless mouth. it’s ridiculous how good he feels. he’s completely shameless in his endeavor to ruin you.
“look at me,” luigi orders, so you do. you look down to see him, finding that he’s already gotten to touching himself. his hard length at the edge of the bed, furiously red, as he strokes himself. “i think about you everyday,” he admits in between licking at your core. “i missed how this pretty pussy tasted. i missed having you like this. holding you down so you can’t squirm away. missed hearing you beg.”
you’re almost there, fidgeting underneath his hands. “luigi, please. it’s too much.”
“you’ve taken worse,” he growls into you.
he feels like he’s on fire. one hand moves up and down along his cock fervently, while the other lends itself to fingering your frothing pussy. you mewl at the sudden entry, back arching.
“luigi,” you whine. “please.”
“i’m trying to do a nice thing for you, y/n,” he hums, “but you want me to be selfish, hm? want me to take you?”
“yes,” you say, breathless.
“fuckin’ slut,” he grumbles, pulling himself away from your wet cunt. he grabs your ankles and pulls you to the edge of the bed. “what d’you want from me, huh?”
“want you.”
“course you do,” luigi says, surprising you with hard slaps against your sensitive clit. you cry out at the sensation, the unfamiliar storm of bliss and torment, and he chuckles darkly. “you fuckin’ belong to me.”
he grabs your chin and forces you into another kiss, your wetness now staining you both. he lifts your leg up and slides himself back into your wet warmth. “you’re dripping,” he praises as he pounds into you. the exhilarating pain sets your senses alight, you grip onto him tighter without even realizing. “all for me, yeah?”
“all for you.” you nod. this is not how you expected this conversation to go. you writhe at how big he is, how hard.
“you can take it,” he grunts. he’s not fast, this time—his thrusts are agonizingly slow and tortuously deep—just as you think it’s all entirely too much, one hand grips your clothed tit, the other lifts to cradle your chin, forcing your lips to part open. he spits into your mouth. “swallow,” he orders.
you do.
“good girl,” he places sloppy, wet kisses along your jaw, your neck, then goes to bite at your tits. “so fuckin’ pretty.”
“i thought about you too,” you admit sheepishly, out of your mind. he looks up at you, raises his eyebrows, urging you to go on. “i missed you.”
to your surprise, he scoffs. “fuckin’ bitch.” he suddenly loses the interest in being gentle with you, returning to your body rough and angry. his fingers massage against your clit, unraveling you. “you’re just as crazy as i am, you know that? running around town like you don’t belong to me. like you don’t touch yourself late at night thinking about this cock. wishing those fingers were half as good as mine, huh? fuckin’ idiot.”
“luigi,” you cry out. was this him being nice?
“be a good girl f’me,” he grunts. he feels you pulse around his cock and drives into you with even more force. “cum all over me, baby. have my fuckin’ kids.”
“luigi,” you mewl again, desperate for release.
“come on, pretty, show me how good it feels.”
his lips return to yours, hot wet and desperate, as he cums inside of you. you’re a complete mess—squirming and whimpering as you unravel onto his cock, he catches your moans with kisses and leaves you shaking underneath him.
“good girl,” he hums, kissing your forehead.
for a fleeting moment, the two of you are perfect. everything feels just right. he slips into the spot beside you, the disarray of tangled sheets forgotten as he pulls you into his warmth. you sink into the nape of his neck, and though there are no more words spoken, the air is thick with an undeniable love, quiet but all encompassing.
but when he stirs awake, reaching for you, all that lingers is the soft, fading smell of your spring perfume.
send requests ! <3
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singer/songwriter!caitlyn and producer!vi… known for her quiet allure and silky voice, cait is a rising star whose songs have almost all been produced by vi. most of the lyrics cait writes may or may not be drawn from a crush she has on her producer. vi may or may not be producing cait’s songs because she’s not only undeniably talented, but also incredibly hot.
caitlyn loves to observe the focus vi has when creating her vision in the studio—sometimes she finds herself staring at her a little longer, taking note of how vi plays with her bottom lip and the way her big, beautiful blue-gray eyes dart across the computer screen—but the praise she gets when she records the perfect take is the cherry on top of it all.
“atta girl.”
“amazing work, you did so well today.”
“there we go, princess. knew you could do it.”
she feels her face flush slightly at every compliment and this time is no different. they near the end of a session as caitlyn records the last of her harmonies and the rest of the pre-chorus. as caitlyn’s verse comes to an end, vi smiles and clicks a button on her sound board to let cait hear her next words.
“you did so good in there, sweetheart. i could listen to you all day.”
a small giggle paired with an eye roll is her typical response to the producer’s kudos. cait’s ears and cheeks are tinged pink at the last part of vi’s comment.
“as if you aren’t paid to do exactly that,” caitlyn points out.
she removes her headphones and exits the soundproof room, walking towards the couch at the same time as vi to take a break before the producer works herself to the bone to get this song to sound like a masterpiece. caitlyn’s legs find themselves propped on vi’s lap crossed at her ankles with vi’s hand gently holding her in place, a comfortable position they find themselves in very often. vi expresses a thought she has about cait’s writing.
“y’know, i honestly still can’t believe you wrote these lyrics. i didn’t realize you were seeing someone.”
cait lets out a soft laugh, slightly embarrassed at the idea. the lyrics are… more sexual than what she usually writes, depicting fantasies and desires that she would typically consider private information.
“i’m not! just… felt really inspired i guess.”
“c’mon, don’t give me that. you rarely ever write about sex, let alone ask me to produce a song about it. she must be really fucking good, so who’s the lucky girl?”
she was right. caitlyn rarely wrote songs about sex and even when she did, she was usually too embarrassed to show them to vi. caitlyn’s had her fair share of hookups, but in caitlyn’s eyes none of them could compare to the mere thought of vi: her stupid fucking haircut that she, by some miracle, manages to pull off, her muscular build that convinces cait that she could be picked up by her like a feather, and that voice.
god, that fucking voice and her fucking praise.
even though she was the one to ask, vi’s stomach drops at the thought of cait seeing anyone. she keeps her eyes on the screen, avoiding caitlyn’s gaze and hoping she doesn’t look like a kicked puppy.
“seriously, it’s no one.”
“bullshit, cait. we’re friends! you can tell me.”
“it’s not! i’m really not seeing anyone.”
“please, cupcake.”
the underlying sweetness in her disbelieving tone makes cait want to melt into a puddle on the floor. part of her wants to admit that the object of all her fantasies has been a certain pink-haired musical genius with a jaw-dropping body and a pretty face, but her pride outmatches her desire, even though the use of the dessert-inspired nickname makes her knees weak.
“it’s just a crush. that’s all.”
cait swears she can see vi’s ears perk up. she’s met with a shit-eating grin, and now vi can’t help but poke and prod further to figure out who this mystery crush is. they giggle and playfully fight with one another as vi begs to know about this “crush” and cait wonders why the fuck she decided to say anything at all.
the regret leaves her body when she finds her face centimeters away from vi’s and her arms locked in front of her chest, held by her wrist thanks to vi’s unbelievable strength. cait makes out the curls of her eyelashes, the dark ink of her face tattoo, and most especially the plush of vi’s lips and the scar that decorates the top of them.
shit. why does she have to be so fucking gorgeous?
caitlyn is certain the red all over her face perfectly matches the burn she feels. she feels like she’s opening for fucking beyoncé or something with how nervous she is to be this close to someone she’s known for years.
“you’re really gonna keep this from me, princess?”
something about vi’s lowered voice and her eyes searching her face (particularly at her lips, she noticed) gave caitlyn a sense of confidence that she knows she’ll probably regret acting on. she wants vi, and she’s tired of vi not knowing. she swallows and looks into vi’s pleading eyes for a moment then sighs, nearly surprising herself with what she does next.
her feet find their way to the floor to push her up out of her seat and then she swiftly swings a leg over vi’s lap, seating herself where her legs once were. vi’s grip on caitlyn weakens and confusion is written all over her face with her wide eyes, raised brows, and slightly parted lips. cait gazes at her through hooded eyes, playing with the neckline of vi’s muscle tee. she leans over and ghosts her lips over vi’s ear to tease.
“you really wanna know?”
vi rests her hands on caitlyn’s hips and slowly licks her lips, still unsure of what exactly is going on… but she’s not complaining. her thumbs fiddle with the top of caitlyn’s jeans as caitlyn pulls herself back to face vi, one hand caressing the back of her neck and the other cupping her chin. vi groans at the sound of cait’s voice as she asks vi a very important question.
“do you want me to tell you, or would you rather i show you?”
#EEEEEEEEKKKK#i need this so bad it’s not funny#this thought has taken over my whole day#they want each other’s cookies soooo effing bad#caitvi#violyn#piltover's finest#caitlyn kiramman#arcane#arcane vi#vi#caitlyn x vi#vi x caitlyn
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Bits and Baubles 🎄
Dieter Bravo x gn!reader | 2.8k | masterlist | ao3
summary: it was towards the end of the Christmas market season, and at first it seemed to be a market day like any other. That is, until the man in the green robe whirled into your life.
a/n: happy @dieterbravobrainrotclub Secret Santa, @whocaresstillthelouvre! I loved learning about your Christmas decor. I hope you enjoy learning about Dieter's! 😂 thank you @katareyoudrilling for being the best beta and helping me figure out this idea!!
tags/warnings: fluff, flirting, suggestive and/or explicit Christmas ornaments, dildos, meet cute
...
You were working your stall, talking to a customer, when you caught a glimpse of him out of the corner of your eye. Dark hair and a lurid green robe flashed by, but he was gone before you finished packing up the ornament. By the time you looked around, he’d disappeared into the market.
A few minutes later you were putting out more stock when you saw him again. This time he was dashing through an open area between rows on your left. You got a better look, but it only inspired more questions than answers – he was wearing plaid pajama bottoms, an old t-shirt, that lurid green robe, all topped with messy curls and sunglasses.
Whoever he was, he seemed to be in quite a hurry. He dashed from stall to stall, sometimes chatting briefly, sometimes running off before the vendor could even get a word in.
You had to look away when another small group approached your stall, and you put the strange man out of your mind.
The market was going well for you. Like most years, it was popular and crowded, filled with people doing some last minute holiday shopping. The stalls had a wide variety of holiday decor, gifts, crafts, and more.
Your ornament stall – Bits and Baubles – usually made people do a double take. You had a wide selection of ornaments, from the typical shiny balls to funny jokes to a special annual one you made each year (and you loved that people had started collecting them). They were all handmade by you over the course of the year, including the non-holiday decor you didn’t usually bring to markets like this one.
The biggest draw, though, and the thing that made people look twice, was the adult selection at one end of your stall. These were also handmade, and usually drew a wide variety of reactions – laughs, raised eyebrows, offended huffs. But they were also your most popular items, especially the wooden vibrators (painted in shiny colors) and “double baubles.” You loved when someone let out a genuine laugh at the sight because they usually bought at least one.
The small group moved away (after a nice assortment of purchases) and you looked up to find the man in the green robe staring at your stall. He was standing about 15 feet away and seemed to be scanning your offerings from one end of the table to the other.
When his gaze reached the adult section, he froze. You wished you could see his eyes, but they were still hidden behind his sunglasses.
His jaw slowly dropped, gaze locked on your small display of vibrator ornaments. He started to move towards you and you realized he was walking straight towards the display.
When he reached you, he looked from the ornaments to you, and then back to the ornaments. He reached out with one gentle hand and brushed his fingers over the golden dildo ornament. A huge grin slowly took over his face.
“These are amazing,” he breathed, looking from the ornament to your face. “Did you make these?”
You grinned back at him. “I did!” You waved your hand around your stall. “I made all of these.”
His mouth made a little ‘o’ shape as he looked in surprise around your stall. “Shit,” he murmured, taking it all in. “That’s fucking amazing.” He turned back to the adult section, and turned the vibrator ornament display. “Do you have more like these?”
You tilted your head, surprised. There were about 30 ornaments on the display, and more of different kinds on the three next to it. “More than these?”
He nodded. “I need two hundred and fifty ornaments. And these are so perfect, I mean, I never expected to find anything like this!” He smiled again.
Your jaw dropped. “Two hundred and fifty?”
“Yep,” he agreed absently. He started poking through the neighboring displays, face full of delight. “So I’ll definitely take all of these and more.”
“Wait,” you said, head spinning. “All of these? What… what for?” You couldn’t believe it. That was… more than you expected to sell at the market, for sure.
He blinked, and seemed to realize he hadn’t explained well. “Oh! I’m having a party. A holiday party! I used to have them every year, but it’s been, um.” He grimaced. “Well anyway, it’s the first one in a while, and I need party favors. The party is famous for the party favors, or at least it was, before. We were decorating and getting set up and then oh, Dieter, where are the favors? And suddenly I realize I don’t have any. I forgot! Can you believe it?” He sighed and ran a hand through his messy hair. “We’ve got a completely empty tree that is supposed to be covered in party favors. So I ran over here, hoping to find something. For tonight.” He gestured at the market around you, and you nodded, a bit stunned. “I think I looked at every stall in here. And then I saw you… your booth.” He grinned. “And these,” he pointed at the vibrators, and nudged a hot pink wand with his finger, “are perfect.”
You opened your mouth and closed it again. You still couldn’t believe he wanted to buy basically your entire stock. “Ok. Well, I’ve got about eighty out on the table, and I probably have enough to get to two-fifty. But they’re not here, I didn’t bring my entire stock.”
His brow furrowed. “Oh, is that alright? I really will buy them all.”
You nodded. It was late enough in the holiday season that you knew most of your regulars had already gotten what they wanted, anyway. “Of course. Let me pull up my inventory and I’ll get you a price.”
He waved his hand dismissively, and when he did his green robe fluttered around him. “Whatever number you find, double it. Wait, could you possibly deliver these? Tonight?”
Tonight? You considered. The market would be over in a couple of hours, and then you were planning to head home and get ready for a night out. Not one you were particularly looking forward to, but you’d bought the ticket ages ago to give yourself something to do the Saturday before Christmas. “Deliver where?”
He gave his address, and you realized he must have a massive house, judging by the neighborhood. But it wasn’t too far out of your way, so you nodded. “I can do that. What time is the party?”
His shoulders sagged in relief as he said, “8. So maybe you could come before, then, by 7?”
“Sure.” That should work for you. “Let me get you a price, and we can do half now, half tonight.”
He waved his arm again. “I’ll pay it all now. And go ahead and triple it, for the delivery.”
You hesitated with your hand on your computer. “Triple?”
He nodded, smiling. “And wait, can you box these three separately?” He pointed at the shiny gold dildo, the sparkly rainbow suggestive clam, and the bright purple double baubles. “I think I want these for myself. Oh, um, assuming there are enough, otherwise.”
You had already pulled up your inventory, so you nodded. “Of course. Here’s the price.” you angeled the screen towards him as you started to pack up his ornaments.
By the time you looked up, he had added another zero to his payment. Your jaw dropped.
“You… you really don’t need to–” you started, shocked.
He just smiled at you. “Yes, I do.”
As you fought to keep your gaze from tracing his smile, you smiled back. “Alright, if you’re sure.”
He nodded again. “And please bring as many of your business cards as you can! Or something like it. I can’t wait to share these with everyone.” He grinned at your display. Suddenly he moved, so quickly it startled you as you were starting to box up all of your displays for him. He smacked his hand into his forehead. “I never introduced myself. What was I thinking? I’m Dieter.” He shoved his sunglasses into his hair and held out his hand to shake. You gripped it slowly, meeting his eyes for the first time and trying not to notice how cute he was. He held on with both hands as he shook it. “It’s so great to meet you, you have no idea! I have to go, though, before I get yelled at for taking too long.”
You smiled as you shook his hand and introduced yourself. “You too, Dieter. I’ll see you later.”
He turned to leave quickly after that, as much of a whirlwind on his way out of the market as he’d been while searching for favors.
…
At 7:00 pm sharp you pulled up to a large, gated house, a bit taken aback by its size. It was even bigger than you’d expected.
You were waved easily through the gate, and when you pulled up behind a catering van the front door flew open. Dieter stepped out, grinning, and you were suddenly glad your reaction to him was hidden by your tinted windows.
Gone was the robe and pajama pants outfit from earlier. He was clearly dressed for the party in a black velvet suit and a deep green lace shirt that drew your eyes like a magnet. His hair was still messy, but it seemed purposeful this time. He’d been attractive, of course, earlier at the market, and now somehow he was cute and devastating. And he was smiling at you like you were the best thing he’d ever seen.
“You made it!” He said, hopping down his front steps. You smiled at him as you stepped out of your car, nervously adjusting your outfit. You were dressed up, too, for the show later. It was one of your favorite outfits, one that made you feel hot and sexy and mysterious, and you felt your cheeks start to warm as he gave you a once over. When his eyes returned to yours, you were both smiling. “I’m so glad you’re here. But did you have plans? I’m sorry—“
You cut him off. “No, I was going to see a show downtown tonight, but it doesn’t start until later. And I’m not meeting anyone so there’s no rush.” You decidedly did not mention that you’d changed your outfit plan at the last minute.
Dieter smiled again. “Ok, good. I mean, not that you’re going alone. Or maybe you prefer it that way! Just, I’m glad I’m not interrupting anything. Um,” he trailed off sheepishly.
You smiled again as you gestured towards the trunk of your car. “I’ve got everything ready for you. Should we take it in?”
He nodded, and soon you found yourself standing inside his foyer next to an absolutely massive tree. It was only decorated with lights.
“This is the tree! I was hoping, that is… would you like to decorate it with me?” He looked at you hopefully. “I’ve been banished from the kitchen and told to take care of this, and I figure you’ll be amazing at it.”
You agreed, deciding not to examine your urge to stick around too closely. Dieter went and got you both a drink before you got started.
It didn’t take long for you to realize that decorating a tree with Dieter was the most fun you’d had in a while. He giggled as he opened every single ornament, crowing over each one and praising your skill and ideas. By the time you’d gotten through the first box (of mostly dildos) your face felt hot and you could feel the hair on the back of your neck standing up from all the praise and close proximity.
“Ok I think we spread those out pretty well,” you said, gesturing towards the dildo-covered tree. “Now we can spread out the double baubles, too, and then the others.” He nodded, giggling again, and you smiled back.
“These are so ingenious,” he said, holding a double bauble and a shiny clam with a pearl in his hands. “Did you come up with the ideas yourself?”
You nodded, ducking your head a bit. “Some and some with friends. I have more ideas, too, that I’ll make someday.”
Dieter seemed to light up at the idea of more ornaments. “Will you tell me when you do? I want to buy them all!” He grinned as he hung a “jingle balls” ornament on the tree, a double bauble with bells attached. “I had no idea people even made ornaments like this.”
“I’m not the only one, for sure, but it’s definitely fun. They’re some of my best sellers.”
At that he seemed to wince, but he didn’t leave you to wonder why. “I didn’t buy them all, did I? Is that bad? Will people be mad?”
You smiled, a bit touched by his concern, and laid a hand on his forearm. The velvet of his coat was soft under your hand. “Well, first of all, you overpaid for them, so I can’t be mad at you. Second, I’ve still got a few more. And third, it’s so close to the holidays, most of my regulars have already gotten what they wanted. My shop isn't that big. There’s nothing to be worried about.” You winked at him and squeezed his arm, and watched with amusement as he flushed. “Besides, you already promised to tell everyone where they came from. What more could I ask?”
He grinned. “Of course! Everyone is going to love these, you’ll see.”
You kept chatting as you decorated the tree, learning that his party planner and best friend Leah had been the one to banish him from the kitchen (“she’s such a tyrant, I don’t know what I’d do without her”) and that it had been about five years since he last hosted his famous party (“my life was pretty different, then, so this is kind of a triumphant return and a new start”). He waved his arm towards the living room as he said that, and you glanced over and did a double take.
There was an Oscar sitting on his mantle.
As you put it together, you wanted to kick yourself for how long it had taken you to do so. He was Dieter Bravo — that Dieter Bravo! The famous one! You could only blame your absolute obliviousness on how ludicrous it would have seemed a day ago that Dieter Bravo would buy out your entire adult ornament stock.
Your mouth kept moving without conscious input from your brain. “Oh, you’re Dieter Bravo,” you blurted, and then winced as he stiffened. “Sorry, I’m an idiot, I just didn’t realize. I promise not to be weird about it.”
He tilted his head, considering you, and then started to smile incredulously. “My name was on the order,” he pointed out with a laugh.
You winced again. “I know. I think I was too distracted by you to think about it.”
Dieter seemed to think about that for a moment and then stepped a little bit closer to you. “Distracted? By me?”
You nodded, just then realizing what that sounded like. “You, um... pulled your sunglasses up. When you told me your name.”
He grinned. “And I only forgot to tell you my name because I was so distracted by you, the cute ornament seller who grinned so wickedly when you told me about the dildos you make by hand.” He reached down to grab your hand and lightly teased at your fingers with his own.
You felt your face start to heat again. “Cute? Me?”
He nodded. “And then you showed up here in that,” he gestured at your outfit, “and I almost fell over in the driveway.”
You laced your fingers through his and squeezed. Your heart felt like it was going to beat right out of your chest. “You’re one to talk, Mr. Lace Shirt!”
Dieter laughed, unrepentant. “I was hoping you’d notice.” He squeezed your hand, looking suddenly shy. “I know you said you had plans, but do you want to stay for the party?” He looked at you with big, pleading eyes and you felt yourself start to melt. “I promise it’ll be fun. I’ll show you off, of course, but…” he trailed off and tugged you closer. “I think I’d like to keep getting to know you.”
You grinned. “I’d love to.”
He lit up like the tree he was standing next to, and you felt warm all over at his obvious excitement. You quickly placed the last few ornaments before he dragged you down the hall to give you a tour.
The party was, in fact, a great time. And so was the mistletoe you found yourself under with the host at the end of the night.
...
a/n: I hope you enjoyed it, Mallory!! 🧡🎄
#dieter bravo x reader#dieter bravo x you#dieter bravo x gn!reader#dieter bravo fanfiction#the bubble#x reader#dieter bravo brainrot club#secret santa#christmas fic
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Humans Are Weird: Christmas Trees
Zork’ak did not mind being alone.
Though soon, he realized he wasn’t. Holding still, he swore he heard voices, and softly, he trailed after them. After a few more turns, he could understand the words.
“-telling you that I know how to drive the damn thing.”
“I heard you almost wrecked it.”
A few steps closer and everything became clearer.
“I did not!” That was Steve, Zork’ak was certain.
“That’s not what Kai said. She said you almost flipped the damn thing,” Lyle answered.
“Maybe I should drive.” Xander was quieter than the other two. “I’m not sure you are the best option.”
Keeping his weight balanced and light, Zork’ak followed them without them seeing. He knew humans well enough now to know that this was the best way to get answers.
“It’s a short drive and neither of you have done it.” Steve’s voice was low. He was angry, Zork’ak could tell.
“Maybe not.” Lyle did not sound convinced. “But I have been on plenty of excursions. More than you if I remember correctly.”
When the three started to descend, Zork’ak could no longer keep his presence hidden. The narrow downward ramp would expose him, and if he waited too long, he might not be able to follow where they went.
“None of you will be driving,” he said, grinning when the three guys jumped.
“Zor!” Steve spun around, hand to his chest as he kept his voice low but nearly reprimanding. “You scared us.”
“No shit,” Lyle muttered. “I’m sure that was the intention.”
Zork’ak only nodded, not interrupting them. One thing he had learned - but had not reported - was that humans often gave all the answers he needed if he was silent long enough.
“Why aren’t you in bed?” Steve demanded.
This made Zork’ak laugh. “I should ask you that.”
“Steve, shut up.” Xander shoved him. “We were just walking around for a bit,” he said to Zork’ak.
The Klyl shook his head. “You don’t need to drive to walk around.”
“Shit,” Steve muttered, and this time, Lyle shoved him.
At one point, Zork’ak didn’t know how to handle the humans’ behavior, much less understand it. Now he found them…amusing. An emotion he had finally come to learn. It seemed the humans had made him feel it more than anything else.
“Where are you driving to?”
He didn’t expect an honest answer to his question. A human answer would have been something similar to their previous excuse - lacking logic. But to his surprise, Lyle actually answered.
“We want a Christmas tree.” Xander slammed his hand into the back of Lyle’s head. “What the fuck, chucha?”
Steve chuckled, and even Zork’ak smiled. It was rare that the humans slipped back into their native language, but occasionally, it happened. Lyle and Xander were both staring angrily at each other.
“Why would you tell him that?”
Lyle rubbed the back of his head. “He’s going to figure it the fuck out. So let’s stop wasting time.” His eyes shifted to the Klyl. “Are you going to help us or not?”
“Help you?” This straightforward method was unusual to him. Every time Zork’ak thought he had come to understand the humans, he was wrong.
“Yeah?” Steve stared at Lyle. “Help us?”
“I’m willing to bet that you need some kind of ID or biometric scan to turn on the crafts.” He gestured to Zork’ak, who nodded. “So if you want a damn tree, we need his help.”
“What is a Christmas tree?”
He was used to Adam’s explanations, but it was much simpler when Xander pulled out his tablet and showed him a catalogued species from Earth. A fir tree, it was marked. A large growth taller than him.
“It’s a…” What was the word Adam had used before? “A plant.”
“Yes. A giant one.” Steve leaned forward, typing something out on the tablet until a catalog of Christmas information that Zork’ak had reviewed opened. On it was the same fir tree, but with lights and small, round objects on it. “We decorate them and put them inside. We’ll put all our presents under it.”
“It’s important to your Christmas party?”
“Very.”
Zork’ak nodded. “Then let’s find a Christmas tree.”
He led the three out, as they argued among themselves over the fact that Lyle was not a ‘dumbass’ and they should be ‘grateful that he fucking asked.’ He said nothing as he selected a carrier, using his biometric scanner to log his activity. As a Superior Officer, all codes were overridden and the carrier unlocked, the storage door opening to let them out into the night air.
Steve took the seat next to him. “I’m driving!”
“Oh, fuck,” Lyle muttered.
Xander shoved him. “Where’s your sense of adventure? Isn’t that why we are here?”
“No! I’m here as a damn scientist.”
Before Zork’ak could even respond, Steve had switched the cart to manual. Knycuz must have shown him how to do that. Then his palm was on the sphere, shoving it roughly in the direction they needed to go, the cart jolting under his touch.
“Hold on!”
Then, they raced into the dark with the wrong person navigating.
*
This is an excerpt from a full Christmas novella now available on Amazon! To get the book in all its chaotic holiday, get Humans Are Merry by Brooke Hart! Available for FREE with Kindle Unlimited!
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This might be kinda niche but does anyone remember how Kaiba was straight up being blamed for what happened to Gozoboro??? Like he literally had someone run up to him and start yelling saying he, a child, killed Gozoboro… like that’s so insane to me
#anyways I’ll always be a Kaiba supporter he didn’t do shit#and even if he did I’d still support him cuz Gozoboro deserved it ngl#yugioh#ygo#yugioh dm#yugioh anime#yugioh manga#seto kaiba#kaiba seto#gozaburo kaiba#just now realizing I spelt his name wrong multiple times#not gonna change it cuz fuck him lol#kaiba gozaburo
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Anyways I’m just fucking tired. I want to be left the fuck alone. My abusive ex showed that he’s still lurking on me and is assuming posts I’ve made that are generalized are actually about him when they aren’t like I’m so fucking tired. WHILE dealing with a toxic friend I currently have like I wish everyone would just leave me the fuck alone!!!!!!! This is why I isolate so much now I cannot fucking deal with people I’m sick of being triggered and anxious over people. It’s gonna end up where I legit have no one because I just can’t anymore. Relationships are not worth the suffering that comes with them.
#ryan.txt#fucked up people#and you know what pisses me off even more about my ex?#I LITERALLY TRIED TO RECONCILE WITH HIM.#IN FACT THE RECONCILIATION WAS FINE.#it was the most genuine I had seen him in ages#but you know what?#I realized he didn’t actually mean it and he was doing what he always did#and yk what? that fucking hurt#I gave you the fucking benefit of the doubt and you fucked me over again#I know he’ll see again at some point#and he’ll probably think this is him winning#I don’t even care anymore please just stop#you can hate me it’s your life you can do what you want#but I took that reconciliation shit to heart I literally told my therapist I told my friends at the time I told my mom#I defended you and said it sounded genuine#just for it to not be bc you’re still harassing me#like?????? you made me look fucking stupid AGAIN#this is my life I’m not keeping score#I’m just trying to heal and get better stop making that so difficult for me
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Just had me first encounter with hackers on sea of thieves I’m fuming
#it was so unsettling seeing this galleon emerge from the fog straight towards us#and later I realized it was because they were going SUPER fast even with the wind against them#they fucking took down our mast without even hitting/burning it which is literally impossible without hacks#so I jumped off the ship with the chest of legends and swam away until sharks killed me#cuz if IM not getting it then they fucking aren’t#and they didn’t <3#we respawned and hunted them down to write down their usernames AND WE DID#too bad it’s impossible to navigate Xbox#anyway. that sucked so bad#and when we were chilling on the ferry my friend was talking to them#and this one guy was like ''that’s just how you play. we make money you make money''#BRO YOU TOOK OUR DAMN MONEY#I’ll get over it. eventually#but that shit was actually enraging holy shit
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i actually feel as though i am going insane bc i need to do TOMORROWS commissions to get the last story key for kaeya’s story quest because i was an IDIOT and and DIDNT
and now i feel like i’m full of BEES
PLUS. IM GOING ON A TRIP.TOMORROW
so i’m waking up early and doing my commissions and then a story quest bc i’ll be damned if i have to wait three more fucking days to see my favorite traumatized blue haired man
#my sister saw me yesterday when his story quest came out#and i realized i didn’t have enough keys#and i was fucking FUMING#and she was like “(name) you need to calm down” and i was like#“oh im SO FUCKING CALM RN you don’t even KNOW” while grinding my teeth and doing my commissions#i’m actually so upset why tf did i just ASSUME i would have enough story keys#i’m inconsolable#if i get spoilers i’m gonna be putting Diluc In Snezhnaya as the first thing on my kin list (that doesn’t exist)#but at the same time. i want to know so bad#my sister and i were arriving back at home and i was telling her how ME of all people is gonna wake up early#and do my commissions and the quests#and she was like “yeah i was on the hoyolab website earlier and saw a screenshot that i thought you might like”#and i was like “hokyfuckisng SHIT did it. okay answer me one questions. did he talk about—“#“yes he said The D Word” and i literally said YIPPEE and jumped for joy#we were arriving home at the time and i fucking. skipped across our driveway#and i’ve been in a haze ever since#i feel like i’m. like my blood has been replaced by pure electrolytes. and like im#gonna explode if i don’t DO SOMETHING to occupy my time#was doing my commissions earlier and kaeya’s always on my team (ofc) but i heard one of his idle lines and i#went into such a fit of despair bc it reminded me of how i couldn’t do his story quest yet#DUE TO MY OWN DUMBASS CHOICES#that i. had to take him off my team for the day#AND THEN TWO KF MY COMMISSIONS WERE RIGHT BY DAWN WINERY#LIKE. GENSHIN JS REALKY FUCKING ME OVER HUH#why don’t they just spit in my face and stomp me into the ground i think it would feel better than THIS
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I’m always writing these damn breakup texts at 4 in the morning
#I didn’t realize how pissed I was until I was like hmmm it’s probably not normal to fantasize about your ‘friend’s’ apartment burning down#love her but I hate her but I love her etc etc#I hope something fucking horrible happens to her she deserves it#and yet I want nothing but the best for her#god I hate toxic friendships#anyways she has not initiated a conversation like literally all year#I think I’m well within my rights to block her#I’m just mad I didn’t do it sooner#lea talks#you have one unhealthy friendship in highschool and it sets you up to be fucked forevermore#every time I think I find someone who’s going to be a real friend#they do something terrible#I actually can’t believe she knows how bad I hate being ghosted due to the aforementioned high school friendship#AND THEN SHE DID IT ANYWAYS#why do I get stuck with the worst fucking communicators#girl TELL ME WHAT I DID TO PISS YOU OFF#i really did think we were close and then she just cut me out of her life and I don’t even know why#like even some of our last conversations#god#I don’t even know#vent post#urghhhh#lmao on the off off off chance she sees my blog#fuck you#if you didn’t want to be friends you could’ve at least said goodbye#I can’t believe I got a shit grade on my chem exam because I was comforting you through your stupid breakup
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DOMINATRIX CHASE?????
#i’m just. sorry ignore me i’m really just. being hatecrimed by hatecrimes md i guess#was NOT fucking expecting that. oh my god. i’ve rewound and rewatched the moment when he realizes what he’s going to have to do like.#TEN TIMES i just can’t stop. that little look he does around the room. and then he just FULLY COMMITS#ROBERT CHASE WHO ARE YOU#and it didn’t even work 😭😭😭 rip chase *i* think you’re pretty#really did not see this side of him coming.#and i haven’t even touched on the whole cameron-and-house situation! cameron holy shit what are you fucking DOING#was NOT prepared at all for this episode to be this wild. i kind of just clicked on it aimlessly hoping to get it out of the way because i#know that the NEXT episode is supposed to be really good and i’m very excited to get to it. but the absolute RIDE i am being taken on right#now is. well. it’s.#anyway i think i’ve now recovered enough to move on and watch the rest of the episode but let me state for the record right now that my#current prediction on what caused the patient’s whole stroke crisis in the waiting room is that when house yelled at him he immediately got#so hard that all the blood in his body started trying to simultaneously rush down to his [REDACTED]—#caseyposting
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i bought one of those 100 packs of pc sleeves so i could sleeve and re-organize all my pcs and i literally???? ran out as soon as i finished sleeving my bts pcs??????? didn’t even get a chance to get into my budding txt and svt collections. ok
#bro?????#i would never have guessed that i have 100 bts photocards what the actual fuck lmao#i never buy pcs i only keep the ones i pull from albums/dvds#and i don’t think i currently own more than one version of any album except the 2 versions of be and the 2 versions of proof#so ?????? where did all these pcs come from. i don’t know. but i guess i’m a collector#jesus h christ#logging off before i spend more money on organizing my not collection#i just realized. i didn’t even get into my other photocard binders like the dicon or dalmajung ones#that’s where i keep all my mini tour pcs and stuff too. holy shit dude jdkskdks i have so many pictures of these boys help.#.txt#i guess i meant i never buy album pcs i just keep the ones i pull but i do buy mini tour ones a lot
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the hinata kinning is strong tonight
#marzi speaks#once again. shoutout to izuru for calling me out on that enough times for me to realize it’s the truth#crazy thing is i keep finding out how correct it is in different ways#like i realized recently. i have no idea who i am or who i’m supposed to be#i think i know who i wanna be? but i might already be that person and not even know it#and the other night i was sitting there. and i thought ‘who the hell am i.’ and then i realized that’s such a fucking hajime ass thought#identity issues moment. teehee !!#i didn’t… think i had identity issues??? but shit i might !!!#it might be genderfluidity having a moment. it might be stress. it could be anything#anything could be responsible for the way i am. if i would be likely to do anything given the right circumstances#how can i know that any choice i make is truly my own#…i need to go to bed. it might be bedtime#do you see what i MEAN though??? goddamn. i should work on getting a therapy appt set up or smth#on a more lighthearted note the whole hajime kinnie thing is SO funny in hindsight#when i asked izuru why he thought i was a hajime kinnie he just went ‘oblivious and gay. among other things.’#and i said ‘what other things?????’ and he went ‘i’m not gonna bore myself with the details. if anyone would know it’d be me trust me’#and well. shit! a bitch was right and that still irritates me a little. how the fuck did that fucker know that much about me#it is a super funny interaction though. izuru kamukura came to my blog called me a faggot and left. slay
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you know im realizing now. with the exception of a few resident psychiatrists, ive had like. no good experiences with mental health professionals
#most recent occurance is eating my brain alive right now because I feel just so. degraded and offended by how she chose to evaluate me#I won’t get into it because it will make me spiral even more and get angrier and more overwhelmed but tldr she didn’t acknowledge#anything I said about my symptoms both out loud and via written test. chose to ignore or dismiss anything that came from me#as if I couldn’t be trusted to recount my own experiences and feelings. also did not take into account that I am an adult and thus have Had#to learn to mask and shit so while she brushed off So Much Shit because i seemed (in the three hours she met/saw me)#functional Enough. that’s only becuaee I put in a Lot of effort every day to do so. and that effort does not last forever#and of course because. like I said I’m an adult. I’ve been yelled at I’ve been punished I’ve been put through courses and#through the ringer of Society in general to the point where I mimic Normal Person Behavior at least somewhat decently when im prepared to do#so. she treated me like a child and didn’t acknowledge most of my major issues. ignored me when I said I don’t avoid social situations out#of fear/anxiety I avoid them because it takes a lot of energy for me to mask and try and read people and act accordingly#and in her report suggested generalized anxiety. part of the reason I was there is because anxiety HASNT ever properly described my#avoidant behavior.#and just. yeah I said I wouldn’t get into it but here we are. this always happens#it’s just eating at me because I keep realizing more and more things she just fucking disregarded. literally wrote that I ‘listed many#relevant symptoms’ and kept it at that. did not actually give those symptoms any validity. basically just implied I was listing things#just. becuase?#some shit was just blatantly wrong like claiming that I have a variety of interests when I told her outright that I can only be interested#in one specific interest at a time- example being the entirety of last year being only interested in One (1) video game. and this is to such#an extent that it’s difficult to make and maintain friendships because I have no interest in anything else but that One Thing for however#long and won’t care about other things people try to get me into in order to have something in common with me or whatever or just. yeah.#issues.#she didn’t acknowledge the issues I have with low empathy or overstimulation. didn’t acknowledge my history of taking things literally to#such an extent that it has caused problems with people. didn’t acknowledge anything that was self-reported and not being displayed in that#moment right in front of her eyes. it’s just. really really disappointing and. yeah degrading honestly#especially because it took months upon MONTHS to get this fucking appointment#and to just be not listened to and dismissed.#anyway. yeah I’ve also just only ever had really shallow relationships with therapists (at best)#and have never felt helped by them or like they ever put in much effort to try to Get to me so to speak. only my psychiatrists have#been open minded and Listened to me. but they were always residents so they’d leave in a year or so. I don’t have one at this point.#kibumblabs
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if you get an ask from me (probably from @clawsextended ) yes you absolutely did i have selina brainrot and i have for literally like three hours now.
#ooc. o kaptain.#[the best idea i ever had was going ‘I write lofi miyazaki selina who is also a scene from elfen lied’ and beyond on both sides of that#spectrum. i am cringe but i am free and she is nearly 40 with a child she stole. solidifes my own canon like striking an anvil. fuck it. i#do not care even remotely. over here probably gonna kitty. probably gonna some doc bloom. today’s possibilities are endless. i can focus?? i#love you so much aderall holy fuck. i need my recc letters for my new job and then i can start. it’s whacky because my indeed is full of job#shit for various therapy professional positions because i GUESS my masters works for that?? wild. man im glad I actually did all that school#shit. like I wouldn’t readily recommend it and I think it’s a case by case basis where academia is concerned. college ain’t for everybody it#is very fucking boring and very fucking difficult and if you’re neurodivergent it’s dick. but Christ I’m glad I have a particular and#lifelong hyperfixation with education and development… that I didn’t even realize until I was an adult. okay okay. that’s a lot. time to#write. love you guys!! maybe I’ll make a fucking promo for selina that I like. pls support my brand 🥺🥺 I am TRYING. I have awful cottonmouth#that feels like it’s from hell.]
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