#Seven Times Down Eight Times Up
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so I finished side order recently
#splatoon#pearl houzuki#agent 8#marina ida#acht mizuta#my stuff#inktober piece 2 :)#shoutout to my brother who reminded me i could replay the credits whenever because i had to get some extra refs for eight's model#and saved me from having to slog up the tower again#now if only splatoon could do that for every cutscene eh. please#i want to relive a lot of cutscenes and youre killing me for it splatoon#anyway did you know splatoon's official art has. well it wildly varies from piece to piece#they all follow like a very loose guidelines but also they all split off into their own things half the time#me with seven tabs of art trying to figure out if i want to do lines to separate pearl's fingers: so this one has lines but this one doesnt#'this one isnt relevant to this issue all fingers are splayed'#so in the end i just did whatever i wanted. i think that's a core tenet of art. do whatever you want. forever#also spent an inordinate amount of time trying to figure out what was etched into marina's headphones#im 98% sure it is the off the hook logo. but nothing save from booting up splatoon and checking myself would say for sure#and i didnt wanna boot up splatoon cause if i did then id inevitably be down a couple hours because 'oh well im here already. one run maybe'#but regardless!! im proud of how this came out even if i was supposed to have finished two days ago to keep with my schedule#especially the bg :) i think i did really good on that.#and eight's little smile i think thats the charm point of the whole piece and it took me about ten drafts to get it properly#i think i did good on that too.#im so enamored with splatoon rn help
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man the struggle of going back into my old art and trying to see if i've improved or not
#i've definitely gotten better at digital art but a lot of the traditional stuff in these old notebooks is pretty up to par#most of my stuff from when i was like fifteen would still pretty much be considered up to my standards except a couple stylistic difference#fun fact gravity falls was the first fandom i drew human people for#got jumpscared by tumblr sexyman my little pony alicorn bill cipher that is hands down the best thing i drew at that time#and then i didn't touch gravity falls for another eight years#hello me#omg i made a guardian falls oc#also i find it funny that the first couple pages in this notebook are writing like i tried to use these notebooks to write#and then immediately filled this + seven more notebooks with exclusively art and never creatively wrote for fun again except those two time#lmaooo i tried to draw dipper and mabel as cats and wings of fire dragons and gave up halfway through#there's some monster falls au art in there i don't think i ever drew for transcendence au#every fandom i touched i made a steven universe crossover out of#eggsistential speaks
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stan: ford, what the hell is it with you and getting possessed by ghouls??
ford: woah, hey, first of all, the first one was an entire fucking demon, not a ghoul. second of all, at least these new ones are *my* ghouls. third of all, apologize
stan: yeah, okay, i’m sorry. i should’ve said that. but, i still don’t get the ghost thing. when the fuck did you die, and why did it happen…(quietly) 1, 2, 3, 4…(louder again) twelve fucking times?!
ford: …i mean. you’re an entirely new person every seven years?
stan: ford.
ford: i don’t know where they came from. except for the eleventh one, he’s from weirdmaggedon. that one at least kind of makes sense
stan: …you…don’t know where the twelve ethereal versions of you that periodically possess you came from? and you’re not upset about them?
ford: well, they’re all me. it was their body before it was mine. we do have a ban on three, seven, and eight using it though. unless i’m about to be mauled to death, then seven and eight can try to prevent that
stan: three’s just never allowed in?
ford: not unless he wants to get the shit beat out of him by the others
stan: wh. what the fuck did three do
ford: …
stan: …
ford: …anyway, you’ve seen a transfer of the main body holder several times since i’ve been back here
stan: what
ford: it was eight when you brought me back, and now i’m number twelve
stan: WHAT
ford: isn’t it funny how so much can change without you ever noticing
#this is an au#wherein multiverse magics mean that all those who ford has been before stick around#as spirits that can possess the body at times#this is based off of how we break up his timeline#number three is late teen ford - college ford. seven is middle multiverse and eight is late multiverse#they’re not technically plural but. ae mean ae am plural so if that’s how you interpret this au hell yeah right there with ya#we only have four not twelve but y’know. we’re cozy. it’s a lot less crowded with just ✨four of us✨#✨there’s four of us✨#✨there’s him and him and me (and me)✨#(no one’s getting axed in this house alright. put that down yellow guy. pUT THAT DOWN-)#^ (references. heheh)
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the thing about having a best friend when you're six is that sometimes that person is your soulmate and your lives become inextricably entwined as you grow together like two young trees which merge into one beautiful inseparable shared existence for all their lives
and sometimes that person is just who happened to live closest to you when you were six
#guess which one I had#feeling really good and normal about how my childhood best friend and I have so little in common that even looking back#I can't for the life of me remember what we even did together when we were spending all of our time together#we loved each other. we did everything together. we spent more time at each other's houses than our own. she was my sister#but then you go to a new school and you're not six or seven or eight any more and the differences between you start to matter more#and then she meets her actual best friend in middle school#while the friends YOU'VE found that you actually resonate deeply with don't really hang out with you outside of school#every 'best friend' I've ever had since then already has an ACTUAL best friend who isn't me#and on the one hand when I say justin is my best friend I don't just mean by default; he's sincerely the best friend I've ever had#but on the other hand I wish I had someone I grew up with#and also thinking about some friends I've made as an adult and thinking 'I wish you had moved in two doors down from me when we were six'#about me
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84 -
I feel a little defeated. It’s easy to see mistakes in a vacuum but there is more to me than that.
My pride and self worth have been knocked down a peg or ten.
Just because I made a mistake doesn’t mean I’m a bad person. I’ve done a lot of good. I have good in my heart.
That has to mean something.
#self love#healing#recovery#mental health#sobriety#healing journey#addiction recovery#alcoholism#spiritual growth#depression recovery#trust your intuition#trust yourself#truth is subjective#forgive yourself#forgiveyourself#setback#comeback#bad days happen but so do good days#fall down seven times stand up eight
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259 - average day
#daily scott smajor#step one. start spiralling. grab the loaf of bread from the pantry#it being stale is alright. cut the moldy parts off#it will work for now.#step two. isolate from the world. grab the cheese from the fridge- the type you use is optional. the cheese expired last week but thats fin#im too tired to go to the store.#step three become a shell of yourself. grab the pan from under the oven#or wherever you keep yours. you did not clean it well enough last#time you made food it seems#as you can see burnt parts line the edges. this will do.#step four. make sure you no longer feel connected to the situation at hand. grab the butter or mayonaise (i learned to use mayo#my preference) and put it on the outside of the bread. one side of each slice#as you have been reminded your whole life.#step five. wait.#step six. remind yourself you're acting rash. this fixes nothing- but is a good thing to remind yourself of. put the first piece of bread o#the pan mayo side down. place the cheese on top of that. add the other slice mayo side up.#step seven. you will wait some more.#step eight. drown out everything you know. flip the bread over. you will notice its slightly burnt but that is okay. you are too hungry to#care.#step nine. finish what you have started and go to bed unsatisfied.#<- hope this helps!
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It is pretty insane that the price of Girl Scout cookies has literally doubled in my short lifetime. Sold those fuckin mints door to door for $3 in da bush administration. Inflation rocks
#and old ladies would come up to us at grocery table sales and be like I used to sell those for x amount and you’d nod and be bored#but if I ever saw some Girl Scouts out selling id have to be restrained bc id start physically shaking them and screaming about the $3 days#the cycle CONTINUES!!!!!!#god and when they made it $3.50 it made the math so fucking complicated when ppl would order 5 of em#but to this day I’ve got my 3.5 times tables down like THAT. better than any actual reasonable times table LOL#like wtf is eight times seven. idk#<-exaggeration I think it’s 42 but like I’m not so sure. however 3.5x7…I got that immediately
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Scheming…
#chattin#taking time to draw and write out a relationship/dynamics chart for the thieves and assorted friends#bc theres. alot. and it would be nice to write it out. it would help establish my thoughts about them#its not poly/thieves but its. kind of adjacent to it. but its less shippy and more focused on how they interact-#-and behave with one another. like theyre kinda bonded together over everything. lines get a little blurred but its what works for them#and i think lumping them all together as poly/thieves is a shortcut for breaking down their character#like obv akira has diff relationships for everyone; but how do THOSE people react to others ??#like pego/ryu is real and true but also ann is absolutely there. u cannot separate them.#theyre the shujin delinquents to me LOL. they are too tightly bound together to let any external relationship split them at this point#akiras not w goro; its akira AND ryuji w goro. like akira and goro would just not work; but ryuji make its work well yknow?#goro doesnt get third wheeled w ann and vice versa bc ann and goro are good friends; they just hang :)#its like. if u could SEE the fucking string of connections making a mess of my white board in my minds eye…😭#so im trying to write it down into something that works for me#i dunno. i think its fun :) i did this for ffxv too#only that was way easier bc its just the four of them. but like. how do their internal relationships affect the overall polycule ?#anyway. inspired by that love post; that theres diff kinds of love. and kiss ryuji week LOL#bc i wanted to write a small thing with different thieves for each prompt#and im like how would their relationships differ from one another ?#ryuji and akira but also ryuji with makoto. ryuji w haru. ryuji w yusuke. its like.#u cant use the same thing from most pego/ryu fics bc they DIDNT meet the same way#waugh.#rambling#just know that im insane. i have all these wips and nothing FINISHED. waaa.#this is what that post meant about being obsessed over bad media LMAO. this is just what happens#u stay up thinking about fake polycules from a game that came out seven years ago#i think….#WHAT. 2016???#EIGHT years ???#funny bc i was thinking about how ffxv was eight yesrs old and i am still a mess over it#well. could u imagine if i played p5 when it LAUNCHED instead of in 2020???
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Our greatest glory consists not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.
Oliver Goldsmith
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don't give up
#hope and optimism take work#it's hard and it sucks but ya gotta#the most important step is always the next one#keep moving forward#fall down seven times get up eight#for later#when you need it
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I didn’t quit because I was done.
They said I was done.
I wasn’t done.
I’m not yet done.
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When I was a kid, we moved into a house that had a huge lilac tree out front. It was mostly rotten, and it needed to be taken down before it fell. It took a while, but eventually, it was gone.
Mostly. A couple years later, little lilac babies popped out of the ground in its place. My mom was determined to get rid of them, because she'd planted a beautiful flower garden there, and the lilac trees would overshadow and kill the whole garden. I insisted on saving at least a few saplings. She said fine, but I had to dig them out and put them in pots myself.
So, I did. I spent days digging little lilac bushes out of the ground and putting them into pots. Some couldn't be saved, but some could. When all was said and done, I had five brand-new lilac saplings. Seven or eight years old, and it was my absolute pride and joy.
Three died due to sun scorching, severe drought that no amount of watering could save, and perhaps just being moved from their place in the ground. But two survived, and I was awfully proud of them! I'd go out and talk to them every single day. I watered them by hand and made sure they were fertilized properly. I learned all about their favored environments, and I was determined to make sure they lived.
One of my mom's friends saw what I was doing with the lilacs. She asked if she could have one to put in her backyard, and I agreed on the condition that she take very, very good care of it.
It's now fucking enormous. I'm talking ten feet tall and bursting with beautiful purple flowers every spring. My mom still gets updates each year as they start to bloom, which she forwards to me. And all I can think is, "That's my friend! Thriving some twenty years on, there it is."
The other tree nearly died, too. It lived in a pot for far, far too long. I wanted to plant it somewhere in my parents' yard, but my mom was reluctant. Eventually, we agreed to put it in the far back garden. It grew okay for many years, despite the shade, but in all these years, it's never bloomed.
Last year, the massive tree casting massive shadows over the lilac and the garden cracked in half and fell. It tumbled into the garden, crushing part of the nearby shed and destroying a few plants beneath it.
It missed my lilac by inches.
The clean-up is long done. The rest of the tree has been cut down, and my lilac has full sunlight for the first time in fifteen years. It won't bloom this year, I know. But it's got new shoots up. It's taller than ever. I spent half an hour a few weeks ago praising it for surviving all this time, dreaming about its future and telling it how I believe it'll become the tall beauty it's always been meant to be.
I think next year, I'll see flowers.
#aese speaks#a little personal story for you all#the origin of my life-long relationship with lilacs#i've been a garden witch since i was very small! (:#green witch#garden witch#garden magic#the lilac post#hello to everyone reading the og tags on this:#it's a metaphor it's a true story it's real it's fiction it's a poem it's me rambling it's whatever you think it is#30k
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the house i grew up in was a little bit of a fixer upper. for the first 19 years, my dad just sort of slowly fixed it, but pretty early on in college, he came into a large amount of cash and decided to just do the whole thing at once. so he rented a different house for like, 2 months that was just a block down from us, and then got a bunch of contractors to fix original house ASAP. it was kind of crazy, but it compressed many years of work into like, three months.
the sitting in a new house for three months was actually pretty fun. and i shouldnt really complain at all (staying at home while in college is a sweet deal)
but.
but. my parents are fairly hard of hearing, and their bedroom in the old house was in the furthest possible annex from everyone else. wheras in the rental it was just in the middle of the house. so without going into details, i was extremely aware that my parents were having sex like, eight times a day. my dad had just retired and i guess they were celebrating, which is great i guess, having parents that really like each other is way better than the alternative, but also, it did make me envy their deafness. i kept headphones on for so long that year i got literal ear calluses.
at the same time, the house my buddy from the shoe incident grew up in flooded. turbo flooded. they burst like, two pipes at once and the damage was so severe they had to redo all the flooring and all the drywall. his family actually had homeowners insurance, which is either incredible or suspicious for a family that used the drained pool in their backyard to store rusty scrap metal. so insurance was handling the work, but in the meantime, they were crammed into a very small hotel room space. we did the math on it then, it averaged about 80 square feet a person.
so one day i got home, and i was chilling, and then six rolled around, and apparently six o'clock was sex o'clock because my parents decided to flex their cardio. i grabbed my headphones and prayed that god would do for me what he did for beethoven, but that failed to work, and then seven rolled around and my parents were still at it, which again, very impressive, but was pushing me to swap out judas for mozart in those prayers. there's a definitive point where you stop praying to be deaf and instead pray that god could take you to a nice field and pop you like a gore-balloon.
i was about five minutes away from that point when my friend called me and basically said i have been stuck in a 500 square foot space with 6 people and i didn't have many marbles to start but what few i had are gone. please. if we are friends, if we were ever friends, take me out of here just for a moment.
and i was still pretty mad at him, but i had pity on the poor guy. also helped that i was desperate to leave the house. so i drove the chickenshitmobile to the hotel and i picked him up, and then we did our normal hangout activity, which was go to food city and buy produce. his normal house was, on a good day, nasty, and his backyard was, as i stated before, mostly used to store mosquito larvae and rusty metal, so what we'd always done before was just walk to the grocery store a half block away and leer at vegetables.
so we did that and it was like old times again. they had some radishes that were expired, so i could buy like, literally an entire grocery bag of them for about $5. so i did. i really like radishes. he got a coconut because he liked fruit and beating things with hammers.
which probably would've been great except we didn't have a hammer, so instead we spent about 30 minutes stomping itike it owed us money. when it finally cracked we cheered like we just got the winning touchball at the superdome and then he ate some of the flesh, and i ate some of the radishes, and we admired the black, starless sky of the city before i took him back to his hotel room.
and then we got pulled over.
i forgot to turn my lights on because the street all around the food city was ludicrously well lit. so it went from being pretty bright, to pretty bright and flashy, then i pulled into a parking lot and a cop came to ask us for IDs which is where everything went to shit:
i’d forgotten my license at home.
the cop was was actually kind of chill about it - he said he could get by with just an address. except i did not know my address. i hadn't memorized the new one yet. so i told the cop, my house is getting remodeled, i don't know my address right now. and then he went to my friend, and my friend said the exact same thing. house getting remodeled, staying somewhere else, no address, sowwwwwwy.
now the cop genuinely didn't know what to do. he went back to his car, and i was stressed that i was about to get into HUGE trouble so i started eating the radishes and my buddy started eating more of his coconut, and we actually managed to eat like a quarter of both before the cop came back. we ate enough produce that he could smell something weird in the air, and he asked what the smell was, and i said radishes, and my buddy said coconut, and the cop said which, and then we produced a large bag of droopy radishes and an absolutely brutalized coconut, and the cop was just like
so my buddy tried explaining how he was sharing a 500 square foot apartment with 6 people and wanted a fruit he could fight with power tools, and i tried explaining how i'd actually tried buying my parents like, board games and puzzles and stuff but nothing worked - the only thing my parents seemed to like doing right now was each other, and we both went on long enough and pathetically enough that the cop eventually went:
ok. stop.
and we stopped.
and he said do you know why i pulled you over?
and i said, because of my headlights, and my friend (who is hispanic) and the cop both looked at me like like i was the dumbest person in the entire world. and then the cop said no. that's why i'm allowed to pull you over. i checked your car because this neighborhood has a terrible sex trafficking problem, and i pull over every car i can to make sure no one is buying or selling sex. and you two are obviously doing neither. now i could give you, like, four tickets right now, but that would do nothing to make this area safer, so just turn your lights on, go home, drive safe, and try to be less stupid in the future.
and i said okay but i was thinking, you know, damn, this is just how i live man, i don't have a hidden third gear i can shift into. people can't just get smarter because it would be convenient. it's always convenient to be smart. i am literally trying my best.
but i didn't say anything because i was, slowly, learning how to filter what i said. instead i nodded and the cop left then i dropped my buddy off, and the last thing he said was said he owed me for responding to his SOS. I said he owed me for a lot of things, and he agreed that was true. then i drove home with my lights on, 5 under the speed limit, and arrived to a peaceful quiet home. I could’ve wept with relief but instead I went to bed.
the relief was short lived. i was woken up at 6 am by my parents. i swore, and then i prayed, and when i did not explode, i swore again. then i got up to make breakfast before my first class.
#babylon-lore#anecdotes#funny stories#the second dumbest traffic stop of my life#the first happened on a date with my wife#and it's a pretty good story#i#ll get around to that one eventually#like its not shoe story good but it's a funny little incident
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83 -
What goes up…..will eventually come crashing down. And the thing is, that I saw it coming. I did nothing to stop it. I let it unfold instead of telling someone “hey I’m struggling!”
So I drank before work and got caught. Got sent home. I made it TWENTY DAYS just to throw it away.
There comes a point in any addiction when you realize that your reasons for picking up that first drink or taking the first hit - they aren’t the issue anymore. At first I just wanted to escape from my pain. Now I’m just trying to escape myself.
My dad is no longer actively in addiction or alcoholism. He’s no longer abusing me or my mom. He is not a presence in my life anymore.
I am the one causing the destruction now.
It just fucking sucks today.
But, we get the hell up. Again. We’ve lost count of how many times now but it doesn’t matter. We hold our head up high and we accept the consequences of our actions.
We learn, we move forward and we do better next time.
Because what else can I do?
#self love#healing#recovery#mental health#sobriety#healing journey#addiction recovery#alcoholism#spiritual growth#depression recovery#bad days happen but so do good days#fall down seven times stand up eight#get back up#depression and anxiety#drug and alcohol addiction#drunk
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SEVEN DAYS
x2!logan howlett x fem!reader
cw: desperate!logan, eating reader out, fingering, squirting?
masterlist
the mission was only supposed to last for two days. forty-eight hours and he would return home to you. instead it was dragged out much longer than it needed to be.
logan wanted nothing more than to be home in your arms instead of a motel room alone, painfully hard, trying to tune out scott snore on the other side of the wall.
so, on thursday afternoon when him, scott, and storm returned to the mansion, logan wasted no time hunting you down. he could smell you the second he walked through the front door; you were in charles office. charles, hank, jean, and you were meeting to discuss a new experiment when logan bursts through the door.
"logan! pleasure for you to join us." hank announces.
your head snaps up from your scribbling to see that your lover has returned safely. he looked like a lion ready to pounce on a naivë little lamb.
"just came by to pick something up." logan answers, ignoring everyone else in the room as he made a b-line for you.
"hey, baby–"
within seconds, logan lifts you up over his shoulder and out of the leather seat. you squeal, dropping your notepad and pen. your kitten heels kick his abs as your squirm in his arms.
"logan!" you hiss, swatting his toned back as he turns around to walk out of the room, unphased. "what the hell! put me down!"
he ignores you, pulling down your dress to cover your behind from your co-workers. no one was shocked by logan's actions. the man wasn't a patient person by any means. they all watched as you left over logan's shoulder, face blushing with embarrassment.
when logan finally shut your guys bedroom door, he placed you down on the edge of your bed; yet to say a word to you. instead, he falls straight to his knees in front of you. his big callous hands, rubs the soft skin of your inner thighs, opening your legs.
logan couldn't help but moan when he saw the pretty lacy light blue panties you were wearing. you could see the neediness in his eyes as he licked his lips. before he can remove your underwear, you cradle his face in your much smaller palms.
"you alright, baby?" you ask, looking down at him.
similarly to a cat, logan rubs the scruff of his beard against your thigh, pressing his nose against the thin panties; inhaling the scent of your arousal. you run a hand through his hair, scratching his scalp softly before your fingers tugging on the kitten tuffs, making him whimper against your pussy.
"mhm..." he manages to say. "i missed you."
"aw, i missed you–"
"missed your scent, your lips, your mouth..." his words are muffled as he kisses you messily over the lace. "missed this fuckin' pussy so much."
you gasp when he pulls down the soaked material and moves back for a second to look at you. he spreads you apart with his thumbs, watching you twitch and clench at the cool air hitting your pussy. she was warm, wet, and welcoming to him. logan couldn't imagine a better way to spend the rest of his day.
"there's my favorite girl." logan smiles before spitting right on your button and latching his mouth onto you. you moan loudly as he talks to your pussy, acting as if you weren't even in the room.
"you've missed me too, huh, pretty girl?" he moans incoherently as his tongue runs over core.
it's a struggle to keep your eyes open but it was worth the sight of logan's head in between your legs. the noises he made with your slick were unbelievably lewd.
"must've missed me a lot." you giggle, trying to catch your breath as he wraps your legs around his head.
"you've got not fuckin' idea." he mumbles into your folds. spit and slick pooled onto the sheets that laid under you as logan feasted.
logan looks up at you and fears he might cum just from the image of you with your head thrown back, eyes rolled back and mouth slightly parted as you sing his praise of 'right there, logan!', 'such a good boy for me'.
the 'good boy' comment threw logan's mind into a frenzy. he needed to hear you. he needed to be surrounded by your presence. two of his fingers dip into you, fast and rough. your thighs squeeze his head, threatening to pop it right off his body.
there was no time to warn him before your high hit. logan slurped up every bit of honey you had to offer him. you reach down for the hand that wasn't busy locating your sweet spot and place it on your tit. logan could feel your heartbeat and it only sent him further on his spiral, adding a third finger and repeatedly hitting that spot that made you see fireworks.
"i c-can't, logan" you mewl, wiggling back from logan's tongue. he catches you, latching back onto your button. "it's too m-much!"
"she's takin' me just fine." his voice is muffled against you in the dirtiest way possible.
the pressure builds in your tummy. there were no words in your brain at this point, moaning and babbling about nothing.
"that's the spot, huh?" he groan, smirking up at you. logan's fingers twist up, slamming against that gummy spot deep in your walls.
the motion caused you to let out more slick than you ever had before, gushing on logan's face. you can hear him curse as he licks you clean.
“it’s only been seven days, you know?” you giggle, trying to catch your breath.
he climbs up your body to capture your lips, letting you taste yourself. you moan into his mouth, as logan grinds down on you, needing more.
“seven days too long, sweetheart.”
⭒˚‧ ︵‿⭒ཐིཋྀ ཐིཋྀ⭒‿︵ ‧˚⭒
a/n: just something short n sweet before i post part 2 of dad!logan x teacher!reader <3
#logan howlett x reader#wolverine x reader#logan howlett#james logan howlett#logan howlett smut#wolverine smut#deadpool and wolverine#hugh jackman wolverine#wolverine#wolverine angst#wolverine fluff#wolverine one shot#wolverine x oc#logan wolverine#logan howlett angst#logan howlett imagine#logan howlett fanfiction#logan x reader#old man logan#old man logan x reader#marvel cinematic universe#marvel#marvel mcu#mcu#hugh jackman#wolverine x you#x men comics#x men
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I do have to impress on anyone who wasn't around for it how batshit the reality boom of the 2000s could be. Especially on Fox.
Here are some 100% real 2000s reality shows:
Who's Your Daddy? A woman has to guess which of eight men is her biological father. One of them really is, and if she guesses right she wins $100,000. If one of the seven fake dads convinces her to guess them, he wins $100,000.
Black. White. A white family learns about racism by living a month in blackface, while a black family spends a month in whiteface. The black family was a real family, but the white family was just some actors hired to put on blackface to prove racism exists
Without Prejudice? Five strangers decide which of five strangers gets a cash prize based off clips and their answers to political questions. Cancelled when one of the choosers openly said he'd eliminate all black contestants
Welcome to the Neighborhood. Three conservative white families in a Austin subdivision decide which diverse family gets to move in. Unaired due to being literal housing discrimination
Seriously, Dude, I'm Gay. Two straight men try to pass themselves off as gay and whoever seems more gay gets $50,000. Unaired due to. Due to. Due to
Playing It Straight. A woman tries to find love among fourteen men, half of whom are straight and half of whom are gay, and she must eliminate two men she believes are gay each week. If she ended up picking a straight man in the end, they'd split a million dollars; if she picked a gay man, he'd win a million dollars
Boy Meets Boy. This was Playing It Straight but starring a gay man and he had to eliminate straight people
Who Wants to Marry a Multimillionaire? He wasn't a multimillionaire. He didn't even have a million dollars in liquid assets. He had a battery conviction Fox claims they didn't see. Because it was the 2000s, somehow this ended up with the woman he won being widely vilified and turned into a national punchline. How dare she complain about a massive corporation tricking her into marrying a lying abuser, good thing Matt Lauer's there to take her down a peg
The Swan. A "ugly" woman is given plastic surgery and wins a prize if she's the hottest at the end of the season. If she's not hot enough by the show's standards she's eliminated and called ugly on national TV
The Biggest Loser. Overweight people engage in competitive crash weight loss that often led to awful health complications. Studies showed basically everyone on the show regained any weight they lost once it was over and they didn't have abusive trainers demanding they take huge health risks to win a competitive weight loss competition. Like the others, this one was cancel-oh, it was a massive hit that ran for 18 seasons? Yikes!
Wife Swap and Trading Spouses. These were the same show and had a wife from one family go to another family that was different politically, racially, culturally, religiously etc. Most famous for the God Warrior
At the time people focused on the likes of Fear Factor but looking back it's wild how many of the worst shows toyed with politics. So many of these shows have a premise that's like "what if we exposed these conservatives to these people they hate?" or hyping themselves up as Important Experiments. Then they'd freak out when they got the kind of viral bigoted freakout they were trying to construct the whole time.
There were also a bunch of horrible reality shows, thankfully this time mostly unpopular, in the 2010s that based themselves around economic themes as a response to the market crash, but that's a story for another time
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