#Schooner Bob

[abootstrapperlifeforme]

The World Famous Bootstrappers- icons

Disneyland's pirate band in New Orleans Square

[ltwilliammowett]

A fine breeze for the Schooners, by Bob Grimson (1945-)

[yahoo201027]

Day in Fandom History: December 13...

When the Belchers got an unexpected invitation to cater for the Glencrest Yacht Club for their holiday boat parade, Bob suspects that something isn't right over who invited him as the Belcher kids have their eyes on the present-loaded Santa Schooner. The ninth Holiday-themed episode of Bob’s Burgers, "Yachty or Nice", premiered on this day, 4 Years Ago.

[willtheweaver]

URL song game

Thanks for the tag @agirlandherquill @theink-stainedfolk

Rules: go to your playlist and find a song for each letter of your url. Then tag some friends to do the same!

Here it goes then:

W- Walk the line(Johnny Cash)

I- In my Life (The Beatles)

L- Leave Her Johnny (Trad.)

L- Loch Tay Boat Song ( Trad. melody, lyrics by Harold Boulton)

T- The Leaving of Liverpool (Trad. )

H- Help! (The Beatles)

E- East 12th Street (Green Day)

W- Wiscasset Schooners (Lois Lyman)

E- Empty Chairs at Empty Tables (Les Misérables ,10th anniversary concert soundtrack)

A- All I ask of you (Phantom of the Opera, 25th anniversary concert soundtrack)

V- Veracruz ( Warren Zevon)

E- Erastina (Bob Wright)

R- Rio Grand (trad.)

Wow. If I had a nickel for every musical that had a song I included in this list, I’d have two nickels, etc etc.

Tagging @indecentpause @cowboybrunch @tabswrites @xenascribbles @splashinkling

@eccaiia @poethill @rivenantiqnerd @elizaellwrites @moltenwrites @drchenquill and open tag

[keithbangkok]

Hello Keith - just thought I say hello. It gonna sound funny but my late Dad’s photo of the Schooner Olivia Brown (out of Gloucester Mass) was printed next to your story of An Appreciation of the Brooklyn Bridge in “Sea History” summer 1983. My story about the boat is towards the back. Since then other related stories have come full circle. It’s amazing ... your watercolor is absolutely wonderful. Bob McGlinchey

Hi Bob- Thanks for your kind comment about my watercolor.

I had forgotten about the article in Sea History- such a long time ago!

I must find my copy and check out your story about your Dad's schooner....

[bones-for-sure]

MALKOLAI FIC!!

Malkolai fic!! just a short, cute, sweet moment of the two aboard the volkvolny, hidden and tucked away from the world. my sweet, silly little guys!

this is just something short to get my writing muscles for this fandom back up and running, i've been hyperfixating on other ones recently and neglecting my babies here😔.

content: fluff, malkolai, volkvolny, no dialogue, just a cute moment of the two cuddling, they're both sleeping, heavy on the descriptions [this was basically just me sitting down and going crazy with a picture in my head for five minutes, and the result was this heap of sugar] word count: 510

hope you guys enjoy!

Aboard the Volkvolny - malkolai fluff

Sunlight streamed in through the small porthole in the captain's quarters, a soft beam falling across the teal and cream bed sheets, casting the mahogany into a rich umber. The gentle glow painted gold, the occupants of the bed.

One with a head of feathery, curling spun gold, shimmering ever brighter under the light as though storing the glittering brilliance and glowing with the blessings of the stars.

The other, tanned skin, bronzed and glowing as warm as the hair of the first, with light freckles splashed across cheekbones, as though marks left from gentle affections and kissed by the sun, glowed with a warm strength from within.

The ship they lay in was a stunning, sleek schooner, with at least three masts and a fantail stern.

Sunlight made the golden gildings of the ship shine like it was enchanted, and rich wood, painted teal and rendered permanent by materialki craftsmen, proudly framed a gleaming deck of burnt umber. Above, the light cream sails flared, filling with natural winds, the day so pleasant for sailing that a squaller’s aid was deemed unnecessary.

The Volkvolny was a thing of beauty, that much was certain.

She rocked gently, bobbing in the calm waves as the first crew hands to rise hauled up her anchor. Outside on the deck, hushed noises of movement could be heard as early risers amongst the crew began to go through the motions of their daily routines.

The pair slumbered on, neither accustomed to lazy mornings, neither prone to good sleep, yet sleep they did, and never better than in each other's arms.

The calm sounds of the crew milling about on deck served as a soft lullaby of familiarity, drifting to the captain’s quarters as they cycled through mundane tasks, bumbling about, functioning off muscle memory as their sleep-addled minds sluggishly struggled to wakefulness.

The tranquil morning was tinged with nostalgia and mirth as the sun playfully caressed all it could reach, greeting them gently.

Nearby, a flock of gulls soared past, some dipping gracefully into the foam of the otherwise unbroken blue, and emerging with a bounty of fish before rejoining their group with a few strong beats of their wings. The sun glinted off their gleaming white back, making the droplets of water clinging to their grey-dabbled back glitter like jewels. Above, the blue sky stretched on, limitless, fluffy white clouds scattered across like cotton pulled sparse like paint lightly applied with a dry brush.

It was like a scene captured by strokes of an artist’s loving, tender brush, immortalised in a painting to be cherished for distant ages.

Yet the two figures most adored by the sun slumbered on into the late morning, oblivious to the world within each other’s tender embrace. The pair slept on, stealing a moment of peace as they slept well into the noon, undisturbed by their crew in a rare show of soft indulgence. When they woke they would be subject to merciless teasing aplenty, but for now they lay content in the safe solace of their love’s arms.

word count: 510

****

I hope you guys enjoyed!!

I might turn this into a series, i was thinking something like a collection of malkolai's stolen moments of private affection, or maybe one of those 5 + 1 things? let me know if that would be something you guys would be interested in ig🤷

[dollarbin]

Dollar Bin #8:

Judy Collins' Fifth Album

Judy Collins had it rough.

Like just about everyone else in history, her songwriting could never compare with that of Joni Mitchell, Sandy Denny or Leonard Cohen; rather she introduced the world to those artists by covering Clouds, Who Knows Where the Time Goes and Susanne. Nearly 60 years later we're more than content to listen to Joni, Sandy and Leonard's own versions and forget all about poor Judy.

And her version of Amazing Grace is nice, sure, but comparing her take to Aretha Franklin's is as silly as comparing my writing to that of my famous brother.

And no matter how many times she posed in the nude with odd, defiant joy Collins could never compete in the looks department with Linda Ronstadt. Who could? All Linda had to do was put on a Porky Pig tank top.

Collins couldn't even win the boyfriend war. Joan Baez claimed Bob Dylan long before his ship came in, so Collins had to shack up with none other than our forever nemesis Stephen Stills, her sweet blue eyes serving as the muse for one of his only good songs before he wandered off to forever suck.

So it's no wonder that the Dollar Bin is chock full of Judy Collins.

(Please note that I bought my copy for a mere 91 cents. And that was in the last year. After noting this, please join me in praise of the God of the Dollar Bin, from whom all blessings flow.)

Anyway, don't be fooled when you see Judy's Fifth Album lodged between Captain & Tennille's corpulent dogs and CS&N's schooner of certain destruction. Snap Fifth Album up; it's awesome.

So let's drop the needle!

Collins' spent her first four albums stuck in the Hootenanny Spin Cycle, producing an album every 6 months full of churning, seasick guitar work and strident, declarative singing. Baez's sound at the time is similar; like stage actors 25 years earlier who couldn't adjust to film's close ups, early 60's folk singers, Dylan excepted, all belt to the back row when in the studio. It's as if they are unsure how exactly this new fangeled thing called "amplification" works.

But with Fifth Album, recorded in 1965, Collins achieves comfort and ease before the microphone, setting the stage for every studio singer who's come since; she sings to us rather than at us, and every moment is wonderful.

Let's start with Thirsty Boots. I always wondered why Dylan covered the song, pretty terribly, for Self Portrait. Now I know. Bob wanted to sound like Judy.

Equally great is her take on Mr. Tambourine Man. There's a lot to say about the track; here it is if you'd like to listen while I ramble.

Dylan's original hit the street in March 65; the Byrds altered the world's axis with their cover a month later. Collins' version didn't come out until the next Fall but it's unclear when she actually recorded the song.

Without any proof, I'd argue that she laid her take down that same Spring. After all, she doesn't sing the song as if it's a Dylan or Byrds cover. Instead, it sounds like she heard Bob sing the song in her apartment one night, demanded the lyrics, then went into the studio and owned it on her own terms the next day.

Sure, Roger McGuinn, who'd served as a mediocre player and arranger for Collins on her previous studio record, invented that iconic 12 electric string sound. Sure, Dylan knew his way around a six string. But Collins straight up shreds on the guitar; no one else is playing for her here. Had she been born 20 or 30 years later and not been shackled by 60's and 70's sexism, it's easy to imagine Judy showing Kim Deal, Kristin Hersh, PJ Harvey and all the boygeniuses who followed how to rock.

There's a lot more to this record. Collins' does her trademark thing yet again, introducing the world to Gordon Lightfoot via her cover of Early Morning Rain. Yes, I know, Ian and Sylvia put out their version a month earlier. But who wants to listen to them when we could listen to Judy?

A year or so later she'd take her talent agent shtick to a whole other level by famously talking Leonard Cohen out of his reticence to even get on stage. Collins knew talent when she heard it, long before others. That's why she relegated Stills to bass in her band in the late 60's and never covered one of his crummy songs.

Let's end with perhaps the most obscure track on the record, The Coming of the Roads. I keep a list in my wallet of previously unknown-to-me artists to seek out whenever I'm deep in the Dollar Bin. Because of Collins' cover of this song, Billy Edd Wheeler is currently underlined on that list.

Dear friends, I hope you are all well. Thank you for reading. I hope your next hunt through the Dollar Bin turns up something half as beautiful as this track.

[jassrain]

"Captain Crimvaren, ma'am," the cabin boy, Jim, huffed out. The youth was in a panic and scared, it read from his heavy breathing to wide darting eyes, and his pallid complexion.

"Take a breath Jimmy," Rain said as she stood up, her smoky voice soothing in tone. "What has you in such a state?" She asked, tightening the belt of her breaches after tucking in her tunic.

"Ma'am, the sky is strange….you have to see this, maam." The youth calmed enough to speak clearly.

"Then I'll have a look" she walked past the boy tousling his shaggy hair. She set up her boots next to the door and remained barefoot. After a brief glance at the ornate long coat she pulled the tricornered hat on to shade her eyes as she went out on deck.

On the deck there was dead silence, no one calling for sail work or rigging adjustments. Also missing was the sound of the sails snapping in the wind. There was the creek and groan of the rigging as the schooner bobbed.

"Are we in the doldrums Mr Hawk?" Rain asked, approaching the helm, snapping her fingers in front of the man's face when he didn't answer.

She finally turned to look at what had the crew so stunned to not answer their captain. The sea was still like glass and reflected the deep purple sky and maroon horizon of the sunset. There were however three moons in that sky, one full and two crescent. The crescent moons framing the full, giving the appearance of an eye.

"Jim" Rain said, pressing a key into the youth's hand, "give Skillet a sip of rum then help him distribute it to the others."

"Captain" the boy nodded, then from the stairs to the main deck "where are we, Captain?"

"Well off the map young Jim, well off the map." Dismissing Jim from her thoughts, Rain went to the rail and scanned the aft horizon.

[bumfool]

hello this is my total list of band names which i started keeping track of in uhh

silly brain thing

puddle of dust

new phobia

dog smell

hello monkey

monkey defense league

gnome child

sex men

look at this cool bug

a little blood

water hog

chilado moledo

wak

moon monkey

shakara

ashkelon

me you storm drain

when the water isn’t clear

dog child

spider tree

ratboy

kingfisher

the hole thing

hadio red

yucky yuck yuck

macramé

we came flying from heavenly worlds

long bob

penis patrol

bucket brigade

stick on fire

tumor tits

earth defense group

bad dream brigade

cat haus

frick sniffer

silly boy

nothing castle

the pareidolics

the miceketeers

bonobo brigade

weird arpeggi fish

billy pilgrim

item nine

el harvey

feline groovy

honey mustard

better than water

gulliver’s girdle

moon bloom

actual flower

the most gigantic

lying mouth

wall of ice

worm buffet

bluku oktan

ricecake

bull sperm

western pleasures

twiggy barlow

letters to abigail

the hat men

punji pit

cockroach prom

cadaver synod

chromatophore

musa velutina

father gunstore

hobo house

woodlouse

slan shack

phantom hand

wisconsin wolfman

aswang

the globster

hunger stone

grazguul thrakka

shudder head

judas hole

repo men

human bean

the julia chord

cosmic sausage

beyond sausage

ilumina

survivor worm

volcanson

god sent the palatine back

ghostly schooner

night clear, sea calm

drive until doomsday

bouteille

mary and the celestes

suicide tuesdays

ballzords

along the coast road

apportioned for foxes

another long walk

nice pen. it’s not a pen anymore

calaguala

pseudodeath

the LD50s

ataraxis

the earth dies screaming

the inseminoids

soft option

donna perola

the gumptions

primordial fungus

protofungus

thick cut bacon band

shaman fraud

fradulent shamans

the chlorindas

the fresnos

saqqara

as chiapas

mop water

the big machine

hexalog

pseudocide

government job

yarn chickn

stiff breeze

we should talk

subproject 3

no. 56 dipper / number 56 dipper

compass moon

no such luck

slop taco

sloppo

cindy the skull

purgatory creek

pig irons

cudbrain

milkweed monster

tulpa florida

denim crown

anna i miss you

the flakes

sugar urine disease

the true story of your death

broken stairway

divine disorder

the crimson hexagon

the senseless perditions

axaxaxas mlö

the plaster cramp

ireneo funes

bliss st.

we’re probably okay

under contract

clodhoppers

black oats

disgusting decrepit rat

saint fungus

hog chariot

enuma elish

akasha

dog in water

pain free prozac experience

no wild dog or fear

old goat skull

great land, house of shades

beneath earth

billenia

gordon through the door

monoxide blue

tiger mask

texas mack

vast poodle

ob dixilis

very velvet

myriagon

fallen glass

chronic wasting disease

seabirds

dozens of ships

moribund understanding

branching of road

safer smoking

pearl sugar

citrus psyllids

napalm stars

carnivorous deep-sea sponge

asterion

rat regrets

electromeat

dumpster cat

willowbush

moon monkey

frogspawn

laïs

asrar nama

zahir (shadow of the rose)

lulu breaks your heart

fungal disease

qaholom

panthalassa

hagstone

stonetops

waxman hides honey sticks on the fridgetop

trash and food

nightswimming

the inca doves

seeds from dead tomatoes

seeds from dead fruit

dreaming bad dreams

lönnrot

camel caboose

sixteen thousand

holding toads

droopy moon

moth brother

cecropia

perpetualcombustion

souvenir society

cages for mutants

mixednuts

pakistani tekken

the film rips

the parallax view

robot subplot

red super bomb

tracing stains

pearlesaint

saint pearl

something sinister

bone bag

[edensgardener]

reminds me of the Spike Africa, a 19th c. style maine-type schooner built in the 1970s by a guy named Bob in CA as a cargo hauler and liveaboard.

Bob was known to do anything for a buck, and used the Spike for transporting logs, hardware, produce, whatever. she was also a rescue boat for races, dragging busted ships home for a fee.

nowadays she's been refitted as a passenger vessel in Friday Harbor, WA. great boat, sails very nicely, and rigged to be sailed single-handed which is totally wild.

This cargo ship from 1909 is starting to make zero-emissions deliveries again

Sailcargo doesn’t expect to replace the massive industry. But as companies look for ways to reduce emissions, it can offer a solution that works now. Because it doesn’t use shipping containers—goods are loaded on pallets—it also has some logistical advantages. “Some of these fast vessels have to wait at port often up to two weeks, because they’re dependent on the port infrastructure,” says Doggett. “They need the big crane to unload the container. We do not—we can unload ourselves.”

Doggett, who started sailing on tall ships as a 13-year-old, started thinking about the potential to revive traditional cargo shipping more than a decade ago. In 2014, she and two partners launched the company and later began working on building a traditional vessel from scratch. While traveling, Doggett had also run across the Vega. The ship, built in 1909, had been retired in the 1960s, as fossil-fueled container ships started to dominate trade routes. It was headed for the scrapyard when a family of Swedish shipbuilders rescued it and spent years restoring it; Doggett, who loved the design, stayed in touch with them and eventually made a deal to buy it.

Read more here

[kennedy-writes]

pirate band headcanons for the void

who else knows the pain of falling in love with something that doesn't have a defined fandom or much known lore? I love the Bootstrappers for their music and performance, but also LOVE the characters themselves and wish we had more developed canon stuff. i want to know what their actual roles in the crew are, if they've decided on this. but alas.

I can't draw, so I make up lil stories about them to keep entertained until the next time I go see them, and to keep me sane without an active fan community lol

so here, some current headcanon:

Stringfellow knows where Henry Avery went and has a small part of his treasure somewhere. He collects eccentric navigational instruments and can tell you the history of each one. He is skilled in roguery but kind at heart. He is also the ship dad.

Vivi is the world's best and most intimidating quartermaster, after Mean Jean, who trained her in the ways of the ship. Any of the crew would die for her in battle, but as she is the best fighter on the crew, it's usually her getting the others out of tight spots.

Grieving Tim was impressed into a smaller navy vessel as a young lad and it was so miserable that when pirates took the vessel he volunteered to join them. He got scurvy once on the navy ship.

Grieving Tim becomes everyone's favorite crewmate. His talent for turning up with impossibly stolen liquor wins them over at first, but then it's just him. He lifts the spirits of the crew. There's no one on the ship who doesn't have a soft spot for him and wouldn't want to give up some of their rations for him were they running low. This is especially true of Syd, though he would never admit it.

Before joining the crew, Syd had been nearly broken down by many prison sentences and hard labor. He has seen horrors and is capable of them, too. Stringfellow and Mean Jean kinda just found him one day. He started off as a cook. Pirate life suited him well and later he became the gunner's mate (maybe Yuri is the gunner). In both these roles he is surprisingly competent, though the crew had their reservations. Though he's still prone to mischief, he is now integral to the running of the ship and the reputation of the crew. His moods are variable, new crew are warned not to cross him, and he's summoned when torture is needed.

The Professor is the ship surgeon. On land he did go to medical school but was so thoroughly disgraced by his academic rivals that he resigned and took to drinking. One day while at the pub he was kidnapped by the pirates, who needed his expertise in medicine, for wounds incurred after exchanging broadsides with a spanish ship. He liked it better there and never left.

Schooner Bob is 100% a bosun. But he's also the captain/skipper a lot of the time. He prefers the bosun job but does like the full extra share that comes with the captaincy and he keeps getting voted in. Vivi, as the quartermaster, does most of the leadership. Schooner Bob mostly wants to vibe and be left alone, but he knows too much of the stuff that other people don't and is well respected for it.

anyway. this is how i imagine them sometimes based on vibes and tropes i like hehe. pirates and my brain just go together. i also have to talk about them or I'll go insane :)

[fishrpg]

2024-05-06: Isle Zone 04 (Humid, Subtropical)

Two islands, one of which is an active volcano, occupy this area.

The Shroud (Small Island, Inhabited, DUN)

An active shield volcano whose slopes are covered in forest are the main features of this small island, followed by soggy "marshland" made of pulverized volcanic rock. The name "The Shroud" comes from the omnipresent haze from the volcano that blankets the island, as well as from the island's more sinister secret: it's used as a makeshift prison and an unusual but not-uncommon place to maroon sailors. A ship in general disrepair (the Emilie) is currently moored at the island.

The Shroud (Enchanted Prison) Large Dungeon, 28 areas

Deep in the heart of the prison is a portal to the elemental plane of fire, and it was recently opened by a purveyor of addictive substances who found himself on the island. He makes Firesight, which is a gritty paste with addictive properties that is eaten to give a person temporary darkvision as well as causing "hallucinations" of fire elementals. The hallucinations are actually real fire elementals who exist between this world and the plane of fire and are trapped in the volcano.

If the portal is closed, the crew of Emilie that is currently moored at the island will reward the party with money if they are able to find the person they are looking for.

Emilie (Medium Schooner, Merchant Vessel)

Moored at the island and in general disrepair is the Emilie, a schooner that is decorated in many colorful, but threadbare banners depicting a griffin. The ship is captained by Khalid the Angler, a merchant who earned his moniker because of his habit of always fishing for deals. At this time, though, he's drunk, desperate, and aggressive; he's currently attempting to rescue an incarcerated friend from the island, but didn't think the plan through. Khalid is not fond of laws or authority, especially if they prevent him from conducting business.

Gull Island (Medium Island, Uninhabited, HAZ)

Surrounded by a maze of rocky shoals, the island cliffs enclose a pocket of beach. The northern forest on the island contains a great deal of highly-toxic flora, which gives way to an upland savanna in the center of the island. The forest and coastline at the southern tip of the island shows signs of a recent campsite that has been partially-reclaimed by the tides. Wooden cargo brought ashore is now bobbing gently in the water. The cargo and campsite belong to the Emilie, and it was offloaded there in case the ship had to take on more passengers than expected.

[yahoo201027]

Day in Fandom History: December 13...

When the Belchers got an unexpected invitation to cater for the Glencrest Yacht Club for their holiday boat parade, Bob suspects that something isn't right over who invited him as the Belcher kids have their eyes on the present-loaded Santa Schooner. The ninth Holiday-themed episode of Bob’s Burgers, "Yachty or Nice", premiered on this day, 3 Years Ago.

[willtheweaver]

Time for a behind the scenes reveal: the playlist of a writer.

This is a mix of physical media, and whatever I can find on YouTube. Make of it what you will.

• The Maid on the Shore- Trad.

• Northwest Passage- Stan Rogers

• Peer Gynt Suite 1- Edvard Greig

• Wiscasset Schooners- Lois Lyman

• The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald- Gordon Lightfoot

• Don’t Forget Your Old Shipmate- Trad.

• She Moved Through The Fair- Trad.

• Pavane for a Dead Princess- Maurice Ravel

• Cobh of Sorrow- Bob Wright

• The Leaving of Liverpool- Trad.

• Lowlands- Trad.

• Fisherman’s Wharf- Stan Rogers

• Redemption Song- Bob Marley

• Witch of the Westmoreland- Archie Fisher

•The Parting Glass- Trad.

[andronetalks]

Ship that sank over 140 years ago found in nearly pristine condition with crew’s possessions still present

New York Post By Alyssa Guzman September 2, 2023 8:46pm Updated A ship that sunk in Lake Michigan 142 years ago was found nearly fully intact by Wisconsin historians. The schooner Trinidad was discovered 270-feet deep in Lake Michigan off the coast of Algoma, Wis., by historians Brendon Baillod and Bob Jaeck. “The wreck is among the best-preserved shipwrecks in Wisconsin waters with her…

[gotatext]

JUDE & NAOMI — DAY THIRTY-THREE.

location :   bedroom.

time :     late afternoon / early evening.

description :   jude lets naomi play dress up. she’s everything, he’s just ken.

featuring :    naomi  /   @heatwayve​

𝗷𝘂𝗱𝗲 𝗱𝗲𝗺𝗽𝘀𝗲𝘆.

“do you reckon hawaiian or paisley?” jude asks, eyes finding naomi’s in the mirror. he’s holding two shirts up in front of himself chopping and changing like a paper dress-up doll.  “hawaiian shirt guy is like, guy who works in recruitment and is here to party. paisley’s like, chill dude who works in the arts and drinks merlot. i dunno what vibe i'm feeling tonight.” 

naomi santos

“ew,” naomi sits up from where she’s been laid out on the bed. she’s not much of a napper, but she didn’t get a ton of sleep last night, needed to lay down a bit. but now people are filing into the bedroom, starting to get ready for the evening, and it seems like now she’s awake to help school the fashionably challenged. “are those your only two options? hawaiian print and paisley?” he hasn’t sold either of them very well, to be honest. “let me see,” she gets up, wandering over to his wardrobe and hip-checking him out of the way a little and thumbing through the options he’s got hanging up for shirts. christ, it’s grim. “maybe you should just keep it simple tonight. do you have anything that’s like…one color?”

𝗷𝘂𝗱𝗲 𝗱𝗲𝗺𝗽𝘀𝗲𝘆.

jude’s eyes dart down at the two options in front of him, suddenly sheepish, hoping to god the colour hasn’t risen in his cheeks. “yeah?” he answers, sounding unsure. honestly, jude had nabbed most of the shirts with fun patterns on their first day, but most of them suited angel more. “i just think patterns are fun. sorry that you hate fun.”  jude makes a dramatic display of being knocked out of the path of her hip thrust, stumbling back from the wardrobe to give her space, the two shirts held limply in his hands like a sports day rosette for ‘taking part’. lips pursed, he scans across the hangers of the shirts, trying to ascertain if any of them lack a print. it’s slim pickings. “i’ve got like, a red corduroy shirt. that could work. it’s just a bit… y’know. i mean aren’t plain colours a bit dry?” naomi might know more about fashion, but jude has his own sense of style. 

naomi santos

"i don't hate fun! just this shit is loud, what is this?" she asks, holding up one of the shirts, "saturday night fever? no." she gives him a look, an exaggerated roll of her eyes as jude stumbles back like he's performing for a football foul. "maybe if you have a nice, like, artistic pattern or something? just not the fucking paisley," naomi implores him. she's not trying to cramp his style completely, just trying to keep him from strutting out there like bob pinciotti. though judging by the volume in the room last night, jenny doesn't seem to really mind either way – though maybe she's gone blind. "it's too hot out for corduroy." she resists the urge to punctuate that with, duh. amazes her how helpless boys can be sometimes.

𝗷𝘂𝗱𝗲 𝗱𝗲𝗺𝗽𝘀𝗲𝘆.

honestly, most of jude’s clothes are louder than on the outside, hoarded as part of his eBay haul on the first day of casa, and probably to compensate for his lack of a personality. adidas jackets and a pair of knock off levi’s don’t really cut it in the villa where everyone else is in vivienne westwood and bloody gucci. “don’t shit on saturday night fever. john travolta’s like… he’s like… an icon or some shit.” though his best role’s probably hairspray. the amount of times jude had to sit through that film as a teenager to placate his sister siobhan… insane. “also! bee gees… they’re from manc.” lifting his hand, he jabs his thumb towards himself. although technically they’re from cholton-cum-hardy where you’d pay eight quid for a schooner of ale when you could get a pint for two pound seventy down the road at spoons. posh fucks. “fine then. if my taste is so shit, you chose my outfit.” honestly, it’s not a bad idea. this could even be fun, movie montage style — he'll come out of the wardrobe in flippers and a snorkel to the sound of a canned laugh track. “bet you’d love to play dress up with me.” because she’s controlling, or whatever the current locker room narrative about naomi is. he doesn’t know much about what happened with her and josh last night, only that he probably got his ass handed to him. “how was the hideaway?” jude asks, slotting the two shirts back into the wardrobe, turning to lean his shoulder against the mirror and face her. “what’s it actually like in there? is it gaudy as fuck?”

naomi santos

she wrinkles her nose, "stop, danny zuko rights maybe, but john travolta is totally gross." she can say that because she's met him. or maybe that's especially why she shouldn't say it. whatever. "that's your style icon? the bee gees?" she asks with a laugh, eyebrows arching, "god, you need more help than i originally thought." even though he's the one who'd actually asked. all she knows about the bee gees is that it's disco, and abba is more fun anyway. naomi tries to contain the excitement that shines in her eyes when jude says that she can dress him up, because this is precisely the kind of thing that's fun for her, lizzie mcguire fashion show montage with ru paul playing in the background. and yeah, she is a bit controlling. "seriously?" alright, she smiles at him before turning around rifle through his things in the closet. he's got the worst of it, all the odds and ends of an already picked-through eBay stash, the leftovers no one wants. it's a good thing that naomi likes a challenge. she tosses him one of the shirts, "try this," she says, rifling through to dig up some kind of jean jacket, which might not even be jude's, "– oh, and this. and maybe..." she tosses him another shirt with a pattern she finds mildly acceptable. it all depends on what he's got for shoes. "oh, yeah," naomi replies, flipping her hair back over her shoulder as she turns around, deciding to stop when she notices the pile of options she's already chucked at him. "it's like. the bratz doll coke lounge. barbie's dream sex dungeon," she snorts. "you jealous?"

𝗷𝘂𝗱𝗲 𝗱𝗲𝗺𝗽𝘀𝗲𝘆.

jude’s “wow” is more from astonishment at her reaction than any of the options she’s tossing him (and there’s a lot of options). if he’d known giving her free reign over his styling choices was all it took to squeeze a smile out of her, he’d have done this sooner. admittedly, it stings a little that she thinks his choice in clothes is whack. jude had always considered himself to be pretty stylish, but maybe it is time to trade in the adidas tracksuits for something more chic — which is what he’d been trying to accomplish with the patterned shirts, but it’s clearly backfired. on the outside, he’s more of a t-shirt and jeans on a night out kinda guy, simple and non-flashy, with a coloured overshirt if he’s feeling fun. “sex dungeon. woah,” jude repeats, eyes wide like one of those cat clocks whose pupils move on each tick. “jealous? of josh? no.” he answers quickly, catching another one of the shirts she tosses him and adding it to the pile of shit laid over his arm. it feels like shopping for siobhan’s prom dress all over again. “of you guys getting a night in the hideaway? yeah kinda. feel like jenny and i would proper thrive in there.” noting that his pile of shit is probably enough to be getting on with, he dumps them on the bed and pulls his current shirt up over his head. “y’want me to like, change in the hallway and walk in so you get the full effect of the fit, or just… do it in front of you?” he’s not uncomfortable with her watching him change—it would feel weird asking her to turn her back when he’s seen her in a bikini like, every day—but it dulls the effect somewhat if she’s just watching him fiddle with the buttons. “or i could try and change inside the wardrobe. pop out like one of those figures in a cuckoo clock, the sound of music style.” he reckons naomi’s probably into all that singing and dancing shit like his sister is. 

naomi santos

she snorts at that, "i meant of josh because he won a night in hideaway,"  though insinuating jude wants her is more of a funny bit than anything now, 'cause she adds, "the lad doth protest too much, huh?" quirks an eyebrow as she anticipates his firm denial. probably just as speedy as the last one. if he hesitates three times, he might invoke jenny like beetlejuice. "you would, though. you guys really get on, huh?" it's a fond question, though maybe a callback to everyone's early disbelief in them. naomi's never felt quite like that, jude's interest in jenny has always been clear to her. she just didn't enjoy how the romi thing transpired. "jude," she cracks up at the way he seems to overthink it, mirth shining in her eyes as her nose crinkles. "you're insane. i can just turn around," she says, half-pivoting on her heel before she stops, "though if you want to try the whole superman thing in the wardrobe, it might look pretty fun..." great fodder for unseen bits, really. "captain von trapp was my first crush, actually." as he should be.