layanomaly · 10 days ago
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GUYS GUYS GUYS
You know how during the earlier episodes we still had theories of how “teen” couldve been Nicholas scratch??? well yeah despite having read the comics I didnt know much about him cuz I was mostly into “house of M” and “children’s crusade” Volumes
And so I did a sort dive into his character 
AND I FOUND OUTT 
THAT IN THE COMICS
HIS CHARACTER HAD A REALLY DEEP CONNECTION WITH THE SALEM SEVEN 
AND HE ALSO ENDS UP BETRAYING AGATHA!!!
WHICH WAS ONE OF THE REASONS WHY I REALLY BELIEVED COULD “TEEN” BE NICHOLAS WITH ALL THE THEORIES ABOUT HOW HE MIGHT END UP BETRAYING HER AT THE END ROAD
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Soooo coming back to the recent eps and what mightve happened between Agatha and rio-
AND IDK WHY I DIDNT THINK OF THIS SOONER or idk if anyone else has thought of it either 
But what I THINK might’ve happened between them is that as we know rio is BASICALLY death personified aka lady death and so I think Rio foresaw the future where Nicholas, once an innocent boy, would grow up to betray Agatha, likely influenced by the darker forces or ambitions as in the comics.(and before you ask "can lady death foresee futures???"....and honestly idk but she IS a cosmic entity and my theory is that before reaping souls she can sort of see glimpses of a persons future and when nicky died she saw his )
Knowing this, Rio, as a reaper of souls and irrevocably in love with Agatha- took a painful but calculated action—she reaped Nicholas’ soul while he was still innocent, believing that this would spare Agatha from the heartbreak of his future betrayal. Rio wanted Agatha to remember Nicholas as the sweet boy she loved, rather than the twisted figure he would become.
Which is probably why she didnt tell Agatha about this and let her hate her for not bringing Nicky backk
BUTT Agatha who was unaware of her motivations turned to the dark hold and quote on quote “hid behind all that dark magic” in an attempt to bring Nicholas back (Which is when I think the rumours about Agatha sacrificing Nicholas for the dark hold started to form since these event took place one after another)
And The Darkhold, feeding off Agatha’s grief and determination,(like it did to wanda) began corrupting her, pushing her toward dark magic and chaos.
And in her blind determination, Agatha became a threat—not only to herself but also to the balance of life and death that Rio upheld.
Which is why I think rio was out for Agatha in the first ep But the complexity of their relationship complicates matters
Which creates this tragic cycle and I just jhebfsekufhbvwev KILL ME PLEASE 
Rio acted out of love to protect Agatha from Nicholas' eventual betrayal, but in doing so, inadvertently set Agatha on a dark path that now forces Rio to stop her. Both are driven by love for Nicholas but so tragically misaligned in their goals.
[edit: alsooo im completely on board with all the theories going on about how rio is after billy on the road since he cheated death yadayada but i saw a lot of people asking as to why rio was after agatha in the first ep and i hope this outlook answers thatt......oh and when i say "after agatha" i didnt mean it in the sense that she wanted to see her hurt but more in the sense that she cared so much about agatha that she didnt want to see her get corrupted by it]
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grechkathekasha · 27 days ago
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(“sailor song” by gigi perez starts playing)
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cinnamorollcrybaby · 22 days ago
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The music JJK men would fuck you to <3
Tags: nsfw, mdni
An: YES I'm including Mahito.. I'm sorry but I love him :(
Incl: Satoru, Suguru, Choso, Toji, Sukuna, Nanami, Mahito
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SATORU
Satoru would be a little basic and fuck you to The Weeknd and a few other similar artists. He loves the slow, sensual beat as he effortlessly rolls his hips deep inside you over and over again.
Sometimes, he'll turn on Cbat just to fuck with you and make you laugh, but when you start laughing and your cute little cunt tightens around him, he goes feral. You don't even realize Cbat played in it's full entirety from how mindless you are from his cock <3
He'll also start out with Hey Daddy (Daddy's Home) just for the shits and giggles.
Songs:
Hey Daddy (Daddy's Home) - Usher
Coming Down - The Weeknd
Cbat - Hudson Mohawke
Hotel - Montell Fish
SUGURU
Suguru fucks to Sleep Token. You cannot change my mind. That man thrives off the building tension that Sleep Token songs create. He starts off slow with a lot of teasing, but by the end of the songs, he has you seeing stars from how hard he's pounding into you. He quite literally steals the breath from your lungs.
He'll sometimes switch it over to Bad Omens if he's feeling extra rude. He fucks hard and mean to their songs, making sure you know exactly who your pussy belongs to.
Songs:
Jaws - Sleep Token
Take Me Back to Eden - Sleep Token
Like a Villain - Bad Omens
THE DEATH OF PEACE OF MIND - Bad Omens
CHOSO
Choso fucks you to Deftones when he's in a dominant mood. He loves the guitar rift that plays in the back while he's making you whimper and grab at the sheets. Your incoherent murmurs of praise mixed with the loud music in the back is enough to make his head spin.
Yet he also loves that he can make love to you to Deftones as well. They're so versatile for whatever mood he's in at the moment.
Songs:
My Own Summer (Shove it) - Deftones
Change (In the House of Flies) - Deftones
Beware - Deftones
God Complex - VIOLENT VIRA
TOJI
Toji prefers to fuck without music because he loves the sound of your needy whines and the sound of your cunt absolutely drooling all around him while he ruthlessly pummels his cock deep inside you. However, when he's in the mood, he turns on the nastiest divorced dad rock.
It just gets him in the mood to make love to your entire body, and I mean your ENTIRE body. His favorite way to unwind from a hard day is with his tongue deep in your cunt with good music playing in the background.
Songs:
Closer - Nine Inch Nails
Addicted - Saving Abel
Bad Girlfriend - Theory of A Deadman
Crazy Bitch - Buckcherry
SUKUNA
This man does NOT fuck you to music. The sounds of your desperate cries and begging for more is music to his hears. He doesn't even listen to modern day music, and Heien Era music just doesn't fuck as hard as music does today.
There is one song though... He likes the beat, and the lyrics are good too. It's just not a song you'd expect the King of Curses to listen to....
Songs:
Cat Girls Are Ruining My Life! - Corpse
NANAMI
Nanami makes love to you with Hoizer songs in the background. He loves listening to his songs because they remind him of you. He loves the slow and methodical beat while he's making you feel so so good. He'll whisper sweet things in your ear while he has your legs on his shoulders.
Songs:
Work Song - Hoizer
Too Sweet - Hoizer
Sailor Song - Gigi Perez
American Wedding - Frank Ocean
MAHITO
Mahito is constantly under stimulated, so he loves loud, chaotic music to feel the constant void he feels. Though, when he's balls deep inside you, he doesn't need the unpredictable music. He does still prefer the fast-paced music because let's face it. This man doesn't understand the concept of rhythm. I'll pray for your pussy :)
Songs:
Ecstacy - SUICIDAL-IDOL
IN MY MOUTH - Black Dresses
wutiwant - Saraunh0ly
Love Potions - BJ Lips
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alwaysobsessed777 · 2 months ago
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SAILOR SONG PT. 1 - N.M.
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**this is my first time writing on here so please cut me some slack.**
Words: 1014
Warnings: None other than it being sad (sorry)
Summary: Slowly falling in love with Nika. Things just seem to be going so perfectly, but nothing last forever....
I saw her in the rightest way
Nika Mühl. Where could I even start. Seeing her in the hallways, on the court, in the few classes we had; I wanted nothing more than to talk to her. She always seemed so perfect. I would never reach whatever planet she had all to herself.
My day was going as usual, except the fact she had moved seats in Psychology. Instead of sitting with some of her teammates, she moved beside me. Something about the way she threw her stuff down, she was sitting her out of frustration. It wasn't because she wanted to. I dropped my head, not looking in her direction. She wouldn't talk to me anyway.
"Hey," A small accent coming out with the word, "I shoulda asked but can I sit here for today?"
I nodded, not able to look at her. She shuffled in her seat, uncomfortable I could assume.
"I'm Nika by the way," She lifted her hand, wanting me to shake it.
I smiled, lifting my head to see a similar one on her's, "y/n."
Her smile grew, our hands meeting, "Cute name."
Instead of listening to the lecture, she talked to me. She asked me questions, she let me ask her questions. It was back and forth. Never in a million years did I think I would talk to her, but here I was.
"So, I can sit here tomorrow?" She asked, my brows raising, "If you don't want me too that's fine I ju-"
"No, I want you too," I cut her off, "It was nice talking to someone for once."
She smiled, "Well, I had fun talking to you too, y/n." She slid me a piece of paper, folded neatly her handwriting showing slightly from the ink bleeding through.
"What's this?"
"Just open it, I'll see you tomorrow," She waved, walking out.
I sat there stunned, I had spoke to The Nika Mühl. Not only did I talk to her, she gave me her number. The small note, there on that piece of paper was her number. Her name under it with a small heart beside it.
And then, she came up to my knees. Begging, baby, would you please? Do the things you said you'd do to me, to me
After sometime of talking and getting to know Nika, I found out she had a boyfriend. He was cool. He played basketball. He was made for her. She'd talk to me about him on our daily walks, something we started a week into being friends. She's complain that he seemed perfect, but she didn't want perfect. She wanted something real.
When they'd argue, which was becoming often, she'd come to me. She'd talk about how'd she wanted someone to listen to her, to actually want her.
"I would," I blurted out. Her eyes widened.
"You would what?"
"I would treat you so much better. I would give you everything. I would listen to you, talk to you, want you, everything," My face began to heat up, my cheeks burning.
"I know you would," She smiled, "That's why you'd make an amazing girlfriend to some girl one day."
I wanted that girl to be her, Nika. I kept that to myself. Sometimes I would hope I would just tell her to break up with her boyfriend, find her someone better, find me. I couldn't though.
One day, she came to me, crying.
"What's wrong, Niks?"
"Naheim," I rolled my eyes, "I know, but I think I'm done with him."
My face wanted to show every emotion, the smile trying to creep up, my eyes wanting to light up with joy, but I couldn't. Not right now.
"What happened?"
"I caught him," She broke, "He was with another girl."
I sighed, holding my arms out, "Come here." She listened, making her way into my arms. How could one mess something up with the perfect woman.
"You should show me," To say the least, I was confused.
"What?"
"I want you, y/n, to show me how you would treat me. You said you would do it better then he could," I was shocked.
"Nik-"
"Please, I honestly just need to feel loved by someone. He's just made me feel so...so...usless," I broke, I knew I loved her, I knew it. But, this seemed like she didn't want to reciprocate the feelings. She just wanted them to be sent her way. I couldn't say no to her though, it was Nika.
"Okay," I brought us to my couch, simply opening my arms for here to make her way to me. She smiled through teary eyes, laying on top of me, her head snuggled into the crook of my neck.
Oh, won't you kiss me on the mouth and love me like a sailor
It almost felt real, I think it was real. The way she held my hand during the couple of classes we had. The hangouts becoming sleepovers, laying in each others arms through the night. We had never kissed, but I wanted to. I really wanted to.
"Hey, Nika?"
"Yes, y/n?"
"Can I kiss you?" Her eyes widened, shock apparent on her face, "Or not it's cool, I jus-"
She pulled me into her, our lips meeting. It felt so right, she felt right. The way her lips moved with mine. Her body on mine. I've wanted this, and it was exactly how I've always imagined it.
"Was that good?"
"More than good," I paused, I wanted more, "It was perfect."
I pulled her in for another one, a longer, deeper one. Her soft lips moving against my lips. It felt like they were made for each other. The act felt like a drug, I never wanted to stop. I flipped us, her on her back, I over top of her. Her eyes scanned my face, biting her lip slightly.
"Is something wrong?" I was worried I'd gone too far.
"No," She smiled, "I think I love you."
My heart fluttered, beating out of my chest, "I think I love you too."
Her arms snaked around my neck, her hands making their way through my hair. She pulled me in for another, and another, and another. That's all we did that night, we kissed. It was like we were both addicted, we were each other's drug.
______________________________________________________________
A/N: First time writing on here, I'm kinda excited. Hope you guys like this. Totally expect more from me on here. (I felt there needed to be more stories with Nika)
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o2studies · 24 days ago
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21:47 || ༻`` 9 Oct 24 — Wednesday
Habits and productivity are going ever so sloooooooooooooooooowly....
My screen time has been improving, from about 6 hours daily to about 4 and I'm trying to keep mindful of how close to my face I hold my phone.
🦎 I also really need to do a more proper screen detox as I just don't know what to do with myself anymore, even if it's still about going on yt or social media. It's not that fun anymore. And I don't read that often at all now! Plus I've been getting quite bored of my spotify playlists and sometimes even just can't find any songs that I want to listen to..
But! I'm getting back into drawing a lot more often now, I've been practicing playing my violin too and am rereading They Both Die At The End by Adam Silvera for an easy read.
Currently still obsessed with 🎶 Sailor Song - Gigi Perez
Day 21 clean
Day 0
Floor time ☑️
Oh!! And recently I started making myself stickers again!! And I'm loving it sm!! I've got them stuck on my desk 😊
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// 🍊
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thefirstradiant · 24 days ago
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Suptober Day 8: Witch’s Brew
What’s My Flavor?
✨Wincest✨ Rating Explicit. Written for #suptober24 prompt: Witch’s Brew and kinktober kinks: choking, dubcon (but not really, just under the influence of magic), and tied up.
Words: 2.5k
Sam needs to willingly drink the antidote. Dean knows exactly how to pull that “yes” out of his brother.
A/N: Title is from a very Wincest-coded song, Sailor Song by Gigi Perez. Also this may be my new favorite lil thing I’ve written hehe
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The purple wisps of smoke continued to curl into the air and make Dean cough and splutter. Why did potion making always have to be so intense, he thought, annoyed at his own annoyance. It’s a magic potion, of course it’s gonna smell terrible and coat every bit of air in this tiny room.
That’s not the only thing Dean was annoyed at currently though. He stared at his stupid little brother. It was just supposed to be a regular witch-killing, or at least, witch-neutralizing. No need for annoying counter potions or dealing with this.. version.. of Sam.
But, of course, Sam’s sitting in a short wooden chair with ropes around his arms, legs, and chest, and a dopey smile on his face in this storm cellar of all places. He just had to take the knife, didn’t he?
“Well, boys, that’s my part done.”
Dean looked up as Rowena stepped back from the cauldron, nodding her head in satisfaction at the bubbling liquid. She had a flask poured out and set it down on the table.
“Now you need to get him to drink that. The whole thing.”
She spared a glance over at Sam, who was currently glaring at the potion, and continued.
“I don’t envy you. But, if you don’t, he’s going to be like this until he dies. Remember, he must agree to taking it. You can force him, convince him, anyway you like, but he must agree. Or else it will be useless, no matter how good a witch I am.”
Rowena took a long look at Dean like she was contemplating something, but then turned and climbed the stairs out without another word.
Dean felt the first spark of real fear cut through his annoyance. What if he couldn’t get him to drink it? They’d only reached one other victim in time, and had failed to get her to agree to the antidote.
The witch’s spell was a particularly awful one. As far as they could tell, she gave her victims a taste of genuine happiness and whatever they wanted until, inevitably, they died or killed themselves in some horrible, stupid way. None of them had wanted to turn back.
Dean sighed and looked back over at Sam, who hadn’t taken his eyes off the potion.
“We’re gonna get through this, Sammy. I don’t know how, but we will.”
Sam wriggled in his ropes and tried to sit up straighter. The glare at the potion became a glare at Dean.
“I’m never going back. I’m never drinking that potion.”
Damn. Not starting off great. Dean stood and advanced slowly toward Sam, ignoring the flask for now. The chill in the room became more and more apparent as he got closer. Was it Sam doing that? The witch? Or was it just worry trickling up and down Dean’s spine? He wasn’t sure.
He stood barely a few inches away from the chair, placed his hands around Sam’s bound arms, and leaned down to be even closer to him. He needed to make his brother see in no uncertain terms. Even through the haze of the potion, he should be able to get this. Dean made sure he was looking straight into Sam’s eyes before speaking in a slow, deliberate tone.
“Yes. You will be.”
Dean watched as Sam’s throat clenched and swallowed. He saw a shiver run through him and his face softened for just a second before glaring at him again.
Oh. Okay. Sure. If that’s how Sam wanted to play it, Dean could get behind it. He shook off the fact that it’s been years since Sam had asked for anything like this from him and the fact that he wasn’t really asking this time either.
Dean studied the man beneath him. His fists were clenched hard and he was trying to hide the heaving of his chest. So needy.
“Sammy. Look at me.”
Dean reached out a hand and forced Sam to look directly in his eyes again. He shuddered under the touch. Dean almost laughed. Sam’s been hit by a spell that gives him happiness and the desire to take whatever he’s always wanted, and this is what he responds to?
Dean lowered his voice to almost a whisper. He could feel himself already getting hard.
“Sammy, you idiot. You don’t need a potion for this.”
Sam groaned and immediately tried to pretend he hadn’t. He seemed like he was trying to look away, but couldn’t manage to tear his eyes away from Dean.
Dean could clearly see the bulge in his jeans where his legs were forced apart by the ropes. There wasn’t any denying it anymore. He’s kind of hot like this, Dean considered, surprising himself.
Sam eyes had shifted downward and locked onto Dean’s crotch, which he knew had a matching bulge. Sam began to whine. Standing over him, Dean felt very tall again, looking at a small, younger brother. So pretty, so eager.
“Shhhh, I’ll give you what you want, but you gotta drink the potion.”
Sam jerked up and stared Dean down. Apparently he wasn’t far gone enough yet.
“No.”
“Yes.”
“No.”
Dean growled low in his throat. His hand came on to Sam’s chest and pressed him backward.
“I’ll fuck that yes out of you if I have to, Sammy, don’t challenge me.”
Sam, for his part, just moaned and leaned into the touch, closing his eyes. He was so responsive it was rushing to Dean’s cock everytime he made a noise.
“Fuck, you really like that don’t you?”
Good to know, he thought, filing these things away for a less dire situation.
“I’m gonna untie you now. If you leave, you get nothing. Nod so I know you understand.”
Sam looked angry, but nodded a tad too frantically anyway. He’s really desperate for it, I wonder how many years he’s kept this inside.
Dean slowly untied all Sam’s limbs and his chest and allowed him a moment to stretch out before he gave him another order.
“Now, take off your pants and get on the floor. Hands and knees.”
Dean was almost surprised at how easy this was for him. It felt.. natural, especially with the way Sam responded to everything like he wouldn’t want to be doing anything else.
Sam moaned again and unbuckled his belt with trembling hands. He looked at the wall while stepping out of his jeans and throwing them aside before kneeling down, facing away from the table that still held the potion.
Mmm. Dean stared at his brother presenting his ass up towards him with his head hanging low towards the floor. Goddamn. Dean’s own jeans were painfully tight, so he unzipped them and pulled them down slightly to give himself some freedom.
The sound of his zipper echoed around the room and he heard a small gasp from Sammy as he waited for Dean to come closer.
Fuck.
Not able to wait any longer, Dean’s eyes raked the table covered in potion ingredients. Rowena must have used something mm- ah that’ll work. Dean grabbed a bottle of some kind of basic oil and settled down on the floor behind Sam. The potion was still within reach. Good.
“Dean..” Sam sunk even lower to the floor, only keeping his ass up.
“Oh, Sam, I don’t think a pack of wild werewolves could stop me now.”
Dean ghosted his fingers over Sam’s sides, pushing his shirt up and grabbing his hips.
Sam let out a delicious moan that had Dean pulling down his boxer-briefs immediately and finally getting a good look. He groaned. Sam’s little pink hole looked much as he remembered and a rush of how it felt came back to him suddenly.
His fingers began to glide over Sam’s hole and he dribbled a small amount of the oil onto them.
Sam gasped.
“Yeah, Sam? You’re ready, aren’t you?”
Sam pushed his ass back against Dean in reply and moaned low into the floor as Dean pressed a slick finger into him. He chuckled softly.
“Son of a bitch, Dean. Come on.”
“Always so desperate for me, aren’t you?”
But Dean gave him another finger quickly and started pressing in and out as Sam moaned openly and reached down to touch himself. Damn, that was hot.
Dean added a third finger, probably before Sam was really ready, but he didn’t care, he needed to fuck Sam NOW.
“Dean!”
“Mm, .. I’m gonna fuck you so hard.”
“PLEASE!”
Sam was clearly done with the waiting and preparation. So was Dean, he could hear himself breathing heavily. Dean gave Sam a few more thrusts with his fingers, Sam moaning in response, and then pulled them out, purposefully snagging on his rim.
Sam was whining and pushing out toward Dean like he was trying to get his fingers back in him. Like he needed something in him.
“Mmm come on, Sammy, hold on. You know what’s coming.”
Dean smiled as he dragged his fingers back over Sam’s hole and he twitched delightfully. Mmm. Gorgeous.
Dean shifted back onto his knees and rested down on his legs. While Sam couldn’t see him, he grabbed the flask full of thick purple liquid and placed it behind himself. He was surprised he even had enough presence of mind to remember the potion, with Sam still stretched out on the floor in front of him, hair a complete mess and back covered in a soft pink blush.
“Turn over.” He ordered. “Now.”
Sam wasted no time at all and breathed out softly while turning to lay with his back down on the cold floor. Dean could see that the blush continued over his stomach and the part of his chest peeking out from under his shirt. There was a light dusting across Sam’s cheeks too. He was warm to the touch and Dean couldn’t help but run his hands all over Sam’s sides and hips.
“Mmm. So perfect.”
“Dean.. please.”
“I’ve got you, Sam. I got you.”
He shifted and pulled his jeans down a little more so he could get his boxers out of the way. Finally, with a deep groan, Dean pulled his cock out free. He gave it a few long strokes, the friction felt so good. And Sammy looked even better, zoned out and desperate for it. Open. Waiting. For him. Dean couldn’t hold on a second longer.
Dean grabbed Sam’s hips and lifted them over his own until he was practically in his lap. They were so close. He could feel every movement Sam made, while he tried to squirm closer to Dean’s hard cock. They were lined up perfectly.
“Alright, Sam, you ready?”
“YES. Dean, I’m ready.”
Dean took a deep breath and pulled Sam toward him, impaling him ever so slowly on his cock, until they were flush against each other and he couldn’t think anymore.
Fuck. Sammy.
Dean groaned loud against the walls of the cellar.
“Damnit Sam- Sammy. Oh god. So tight.”
Dean looked up at Sam’s face again. It was flushed red, but Sam was grinning, smiling like he’d gotten exactly what he wanted. Dean rolled his hips into him and felt a stab of pride at watching Sammy’s smile slip to an open mouthed moan of pleasure. He pulled moan after moan out of his brother’s mouth as he began rocking steadily into him. Damn his sounds are so hot.
Sam was breathing out a quiet stream of yes yes Yes YES with every thrust of Dean’s hips. Dean smiled to himself. Well, if he got a yes for that..then-
He reached behind himself to close his fingers around the now cold flask. Bending over Sam to reach his face pressed him in so deep, both of them let out a groan.
“Mm come on, it’s time.”
Sam opened eyes he had shut when Dean pressed into him and flicked his gaze to Dean, to the flask, back to Dean, and back to flask again. He looked like he was about to protest, so Dean changed the angle of his hips just slightly, where he knew Sam wouldn’t be able to resist.
Sam’s eyes rolled back in his head as Dean hit that perfect spot inside him and his hands flew out to either side. Then, very quietly, almost so Dean couldn’t hear, he replied.
“Yes, Dean.”
And Sam left his mouth hung open, waiting.
Dean was flooded with immense relief and red-hot lust at the same time. He dragged his free hand up to land on his brother’s neck and started to pour as much of the potion as he could into his mouth. Then he massaged his neck until he’d been forced to swallow all of it.
Without stopping the movement of his cock inside Sam, he kept this up until the flask was completely drained. Only a drop remained, dribbling from Sam’s lips as he tried to breathe. Dean released the flask and his hand that was holding Sam’s neck.
“There. You did it.”
But Sam looked desperately out at his brother and grabbed the hand that had been around his neck to bring it back to where it belonged. He patted Dean’s hand where he had rested it back on his throat in a silent, but blindingly clear, message.
A rush of heat went straight to Dean’s head and cock and he found his vision went a little hazy from the pressure. Damn, the things he does to me. He’s insane.
Dean closed his hand around Sam’s throat anyway, no longer trying to make him swallow, but instead trapping all his air. He brought his other hand to wrap around Sam’s throbbing cock, leaking a steady flow of precome.
Sam groaned, as much as he could while his airway was being blocked, and arched his back toward Dean. He’s so beautiful like this, Dean thought. Sam’s face wore an expression of absolute bliss and lust. Dean wondered vaguely how many times he’d ever get to see that look on his brother’s face.
“Sammy. Oh, Sammy. Come for me.”
That was all Sam needed to start shaking. His mouth opened in a silent scream or moan or gasp or something, Dean wasn’t sure, and he was coming all over Dean’s hand. It felt like he came forever, thick white stripes coating his palm, and rolling and clenching around Dean’s cock.
Would he?.. Dean wondered and decided to test his theory. He brought his filthy hand up to Sam’s face and covered his mouth with it. Dribbles of come started to mix with the remnants of the potion on Sam’s lips. He loosened the vice grip on Sam’s throat just enough so he could start gasping into his hand.
Sam’s eyes opened briefly, glanced at the hand with a flash of understanding, and closed again. Then his tongue came out and danced over Dean’s palm, licking up as much come as he could reach. No hesitation whatsoever.
Dean’s groan was so low it was almost impossible to hear.
“Fucking hell, Sam. Fuck- I’m coming.”
Dean’s hips gave one last wild thrust into Sam before he pressed in all the way and held there, head hanging down and limbs shuddering. The buildup of pressure that had begun with Sam tied to that damn chair released deep into him.
“Damn.”
That was the most intense orgasm Dean’s had in.. well probably ever had. He looked up to check in on Sam who, for what it was worth, looked much more lucid than he had in awhile.
“Hey. Sam, you back?”
Sam’s voice was breathy and raspy as he coughed and attempted to respond.
“Yeah.. yeah, Dean, I’m back.”
It worked. Thank god. Dean sighed and reached out a tired hand to pat Sam on the chest. He sat back, not wanting to pull out of Sam just yet. He didn’t want to ever be apart from Sam again.
“Good. Welcome back, little brother.”
FIN
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1ovemelikeasailor · 3 months ago
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Savior pt.2
AGAIN WITH THE SONG DONT MAKE ME YELL AT YOU GUYS YALL SHOULD KNOW BETTER.
"Sailor Song" -GiGi Perez
Summary: both kids in denial, for different reasons.
Jenna Ortega x Female Reader
HIGHSCHOOL!AU
Check out pt.1
-
No one's POV:
Eventually both of them left. Jenna left off to church by herself—it wasn't even a church day, but she told Y/n she had to do something. Y/n went off to walk, just walk wherever she could.
-
Jenna plays with her golden cross looking at the stand in church. No one was in, it was just Jenna sitting where she usually sat at church. She couldn't move, just stare.
She replays the moments in her head—the moments where you told her you were there...you were here. Whats wrong with her? What's happening? She stares at the statue of Christ behind the stand. She doesn't get it, she doesn't get whats happening—why it's happening to her?
"God, please, tell me what's wrong—I don't understand! Why—" Jenna starts crying talking to herself.
-
Saturday
It was now the next week at church.
Y/n had already arrived with her family, just listening to the speech the pastor gave every weekend.
There was Jenna..sitting on the other side—looking at Y/n. At. Y/n. She cursed herself for even letting her eyes catch a glimpse of Y/n.
What have you done to her?
Eventually the speeches had finally end—Y/n already knew the drill going around the church. She walked around seeing someone.
"Jack? You go to church?" Y/n furrows her eyebrows extremely confused. Jack couldn't sit still for even a minute—especially in class, now church? That's way longer than just a class.
"Uh, obviously not, but me and Mason were about to go out to eat and he said you'd be here. So you down?" He asks, looking around. "Oh—"
"What?"
"Jenna. It's Jenna. Shes starring—"
"What?" Y/n looked even more confused.
No amount of times Jenna can pray, this won't go away. You won't go away, and she hated herself for it.
"Okay that was weird—she looked away already."
"Uh, yeah, wanna go out to eat now?" Y/n suggests, he nods and they both leave on their way. Jenna's in the aisle they are walking out of. As soon as they pass her a bump hits Y/n's shoulder. It's Jenna walk right past her.
"Hey—!" Jack was about to say something before Y/n hits him in the stomach. It makes him groan in pain, holding his own stomach.
"This is church Jack, not school, c'mon man."
"Whatever, Jenna's bad news, man."
-
Monday
Y/n's music is interrupted by her headphones being taken off. Her eyes shoot up to the person who did.
"Tough day?"
Y/n doesn't respond, grabbing her headphones back. She goes back to listening to music.
"Understandable." Jenna nods sitting next to Y/n. She takes Y/n's headphones again.
"Jenna—stop."
"No. Why are you mad?"
"Why are you here?" Y/n snaps.
"Cheer."
"Right, cheer practice ended an hour ago." She scoffs leaving Jenna speechless. "Why are you really here, Jenna?" She raises her eyebrows, but Jenna doesn't respond.
She couldn't tell Y/n the truth. She couldn't tell her she was here because she wanted to see her again. She couldn't tell her she wanted to look in her eyes because it felt like home. She couldn't tell her the amount of times she tried to pray this away—she couldn't tell her how many times shes looked at her in church or school. She couldn't tell her she wanted you to herself. She couldn't even tell herself that—so how could she tell..you?
"Hello?" Y/n looks at Jenna zoned out. "You missed me or something?"
Jenna laughs.
"Me..? Me miss you? Are you fucking kidding?"
Y/n's never heard Jenna cuss before.
"Of course I wouldn't miss a queer kid like you! I just felt bad for you—call it pity, yeah?" Jenna tells her, no remorse. The immediate regret fills Jenna's eyes.
Fuck.
"Why do you do this, Jenna?"
"What are you talking about?"
"You put this whole personality on—"
"You don't know me."
"You're right." Y/n gets up grabbing her backpack. "I don't. Don't know why I even tried." She scoffs.
She watches as Y/n walks away from her. Her heart pounding wanting to go after her, but her feet staying in the same spot. She sees you get farther and farther away from her.
Y/n was right, cheer practice ended an hour ago. Why was Jenna here..?
-
Tuesday
"I don't want to say told you so but—" Y/n cuts Mason off.
"Not in the mood, Mase."
Jasmin reads your facial expressions.
"Wait, did you actually like this girl? Y/n we told you she's bad news—for you, for everyone. Not to mention what she did to Jack."
Jack looks up at Jasmin.
"Jasmin."
"Sorry—sorry, just had to get my point across."
"There was something about her—something, Jas."
"Or maybe shes just a bitch?"
"Okay, Jasmin. Let's stop." Mason stops Jasmin.
Y/n thinks back on the moment. Jenna's brown eyes looking into her eyes. Her brown wavy hair dangling from her small ponytail. Her black leggings and small school crop top. The way they talked that one day underneath the bleachers—like it was just them. Just..them.
Y/n wouldn't mind falling in love with a girl, if that didn't mean falling in love with... Jenna Ortega.
-
Jenna paces back and forth in her room. Her golden cross now becoming very breakable in her eyes. She see's her own bible in the corner of her eyes. What are you doing, Jen?
Tears feel her eyes, she doesn't know what to do. She's never felt this way before—not for any...girl. Jenna didn't want to go to hell. All her life she was told that she'll marry a nice man, have kids, and become a housewife. Her whole life she was told that Y/n was a bad person for who she liked. She liked girls, the same gender, thats not suppose to happen, but now it's happening to Jenna.
Jenna wouldn't mind being in love with Y/n, if it didn't mean being in love with...a girl.
-
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deadcactuswalking · 2 months ago
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REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 14/09/2024 (Linkin Park Reunite! + Central Cee/RAYE, Fred again.. - ten days)
Sabrina Carpenter may no longer hold the top three of the UK Singles Chart but she still hangs onto the top two with “Espresso” at #2 and “Taste” at its third week at #1. It’s an interesting one so welcome back to REVIEWING THE CHARTS!
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content warning: language, discussion of sexual assault
Rundown
As always, we start with our notable dropouts, those being songs that exit the UK Top 75 (which is what I cover) after five weeks in the region or a peak in the top 40. This week, we bid farewell to a long list of hits, including “Double Life” by Pharrell Williams, “Bring Me Joy” by Rudimental and Karen Harding, “Pour Me a Drink” by Post Malone featuring Blake Shelton, “misses” by Dominic Fike, “360” by Charli xcx, Badger’s remix of “These Words” by Natasha Bedingfield, “Fortnight” by Taylor Swift featuring Post Malone, “Happier” by The Blessed Madonna featuring Clementine Douglas, “Dancing in the Dark” by Bruce Springsteen, “Houdini” by Dua Lipa and finally, “Evergreen” by Richy Mitch & the Coal Miners. Whew.
Now what ended up replacing this mass exodus of songs? Well, other than the new tracks, which we have plenty of, we also have re-entries for “i like the way you kiss me” by Artemas at #74, “Iris” by the Goo Goo Dolls at #69 and “Numb” by Linkin Park at #41, which we’ll get to. We also see a few boosts for “Scared to Start” by Michael Marcagi at #65, “Belong Together” by Mark Ambor at #59, “Carry You Home” by Alex Warren at #36, “WILDFLOWER” by Billie Eilish at #30, “We Play” by Coldplay and friends at #26, “The Door” by Teddy Swims at #16, “Sailor Song” by Gigi Perez at #13, “Move” by Adam Port, Stryv and Malachiii at #12 and “Somedays” by Sonny Fodera, Jazzy and D.O.D at #10, with most of the higher gains filling in for Oasis losses.
Our top five in the UK Singles Chart this week consists of: “Please Please Please” by Sabrina Carpenter at #5, “The Emptiness Machine” by Linkin Park at #4 (yes, I know, we’ll get to it), “Good Luck, Babe!” by Chappell Roan at #3 then of course, Sabrina with the top two. As for what’s below, it’s pretty interesting so let’s start right at the bottom.
New Entries
#75 - “Embrace It” - Ndotz
Produced by RJ Pasin
We start with… what? Okay, so Ndotz is a rapper from the UK who imitates Cash Cobain’s cover art gimmick on this single’s art, but the music is anything but, going for a bass-heavy rhythm not dissimilar to a Neptunes beat but with bass so blown-out it basically comes as its own bass-boosted meme version, which makes sense given that it’s barely two minutes, mentions TikTok in the chorus and commands girls to twerk, presumably to this song, so the mystery is solved to why this cheap, kind of garbage mix is charting. The worst thing is, thanks to the silly acoustic guitar and the fact you can tell Ndotz is having some fun, I don’t even dislike this. I don’t want to give the obvious, somewhat cynical attempt at virality much praise, I don’t want to “hand it to ‘em”, but I gotta hand it to ‘em. It’s just somewhat funny, and that’s pretty much all it wanted to be. Sure!
#71 - “Circadian Rhythm” - Drake
Produced by London Cyr, Ben10k, Eli Brown and Gordo
So, the embarrassed post-beef Drake has been posting songs on social media, leaking them to his website, hoping the sample gets cleared, then tossing it onto streaming if the reception is positive, and this has been vaguely unsuccessful, with the songs - even potential hits like “It’s Up” with 21 Savage and Young Thug - not making much noise, even with Drake still dissing subliminally throughout these leftovers. This song from the latest re-release of 100 GIGS - in reference to the realest thing he’s ever done: dump a bunch of useless files on a website because he felt like it - is billed as somewhat of a sequel to his 2013 song “The Language” but this all just feels like a demo. The chorus is primarily drumless, filling space with a chipmunk sample, and the verses have oddly webby-sounding snares, with Drake’s verses not fully equipped to the beat yet, and some unclear vocals if I’m being honest where I absolutely had to check what he was trying to say. This might be common for Future but definitely not Drake, whose nasal drone has never been indecipherable. The song ends abruptly, has frankly nothing to say with pretty minimal and vague lyrics about the rap game betraying him and shouting out Toronto artists, which may be the realm he should be in: part of Kendrick’s critique was his lack of identity, and harkening back to when Drake was at least marginally closer to his birthplace may be a step in the right direction regarding that. If this is the Toronto sound, though, this may be the drowsiest of all time because this is clearly a dull leftover, and for Drake, whose discography is no stranger to dull leftovers, when it’s this obvious, that’s just sad.
#70 - “I Adore You” - HUGEL, Topic and Arash featuring Daecolm
Produced by HUGEL, Topic, A7S and Late Nine
The only names I recognised here were Topic and A7S, who had some hits together in 2021, namely the top 10s “Breaking Me” and “Your Love (9PM)”, which were both okay slices of European deep house. Here, the German and Swede DJs team up with HUGEL from France, Iranian singer Arash Labaf who represented Azerbaijan in Eurovision years ago and South African-born Daecolm for a considerably multinational collaboration. Music really is borderless these days so I was interested on how this would mesh, and whilst you can definitely hear Daecolm bring an Afro-house rhythm in both the percussion and higher-register vocals, they’re inserted into a more generic tropical house template that doesn’t allow the organic sense of much of the African music that charts nowadays translate very well. I appreciate the strings in the back of the chorus, but with such an echoed mix and incessant “la-la” vocals, the final product renders as overproduced with very few realised sonic ideas, just kind of an unemotive noise, which is disappointing but might be expected with four lead artists, four producers and a short runtime that aligns strictly with the typical EDM build-drop format, but without much impact as everything is a wispy cloud, made to soundtrack adverts telling me to visit the Canary Islands rather than actually form that solid of a groove or string me along with an anthemic hook. It just kinds of floats in the air, but with a stiffness brought to it by how programmed it all is, and how there’s little in the way of actually unique sound design. I suppose it joins “Move” in this niche category of international Afro-house tunes which set the energy to negative numbers, but we didn’t really need another one.
#68 - “BABY I’M BACK” - The Kid LAROI
Produced by Rogét Chahayed and Dopamine
I know this looks bad with The Kid LAROI and Drake, but I promise you that there is interesting, worthwhile and genuinely amazing music coming up, it’s just that there’s plenty of less impressive stuff to get through also, like all weeks. I was faintly interested to see LAROI collaborate with UK DJ group Dopamine, who typically don’t collaborate with rappers necesssarily, but that quickly left me when I realised it was another lazy sample flip. As I always say, the story starts in 1977, when Player released “Baby Come Back”, cheesy soft-rock adult contemporary schlock typically schmaltzy of its era,  but just catchy enough to be a semi-ironic guilty pleasure, which Yung Gravy understood when using the track as the basis for his comedic storytelling track about MILFs, “Cheryl”, from all the way back in 2017. So why The Kid LAROI wants to try and get us to believe it as a semi-serious breakup narrative with some toxic piss-offs but still loving platitudes, is completely beyond me. The original song by LA band Player peaked at #32 over here despite topping the charts stateside, though Vanessa Hudgens brought it back to the chart by sampling it on 2006’s “Come Back to Me”, peaking at a whopping… #100. Mr. LAROI’s rendition is largely pointless, with a weirdly-mixed chipmunk variation of the hook, where you can tell it transitions to a version where the vocals may have been removed through an AI website, which is largely covered by the drums, so why so much of the song actively presents the sample without them is also beyond me, the drop doesn’t hit hard or anything. I suppose the bridge’s flip on the original hook with the pianos is sweet, but LAROI doesn’t have the soul in him to pull this off, at least not yet. Sorry, it gets close to being… okay, though.
#66 - “Neva Play” - Megan Thee Stallion featuring RM
Produced by LilJuMadeDaBeat, Shae Jacobs, B Ham and Peter Fenn
“Neva Play” is the newest single from Texas rapper Megan Thee Stallion, coinciding with the success of her VMAs hosting and her other stateside hit “Mamushi” with Japanese rapper Yuki Chiba, by bringing Korean rapper RM, of BTS fame, to the fold, though Megan had remixed “Butter” before so this is not the first time they’ve crossed paths. Hilariously, Megan makes what appears to be an active attempt to keep it clean here, to fit with BTS’ young fanbase, seemingly unaware that RM was not afraid to drop F-bombs anyway. Other than that trivial note, the song’s pretty cool, there’s a minimal phonk beat that really brings into question why it needed more than Megan’s long-time collaborator LilJu to bring it together, though the distracting deep backing vocal is a bit off-putting in the verses. Megan has a lot of charisma, and whilst the content isn’t anything new - or really anything referencing East Asian culture outside of a “Hadouken!” ad-lib - her verse is a lot of fun. The counting chorus feels a bit basic or immature for this kind of banger, but RM brings a really compelling verse here. In fact, he outperforms Megan by just being really interesting - I wasn’t familiar with just how deep his drawl could go, pairing interestingly with Megan by smokily floating in at the end of the chorus and quickly going into a staccato verse about how he paved the way for Asian artists, before swtching into different flows and paces, including one moment where he purposefully kills all momentum of his verse to echo into a different cadence that feels very fittingly Memphis and also surprisingly catchy, with a decent amount of unique character and swag to his warm tone that he later brings onto the final chorus. Without RM, this would be a fine if typical Megan track, but his performance is pretty interesting if not a bit awkward or slightly abridged, and I like to hear the BTS members stepping into weirder cadences and musical ideas. More of RM would be interesting to hear.
#64 - “peace u need” - Fred again.. and Joy Anonymous
Produced by Fred again.., Joy Anonymous, Barney Lister and Will Bloomfield
So this week, Fred again.. released one of my favourite albums of the year, ten days. I spoke more about this on my RateYourMusic 2024 listening log - account name: exclusivelytopostown - but in summary, the album acts as what I would imagine as a picturebook, a collage of postcards reflecting on a particular Summer wherein those memories are all stored in layered, gorgeous progressive house taking motifs from more ambient directions and placing them into slow-burn atmospheric dance tracks. Outside of “adore u”, I love pretty much all of the songs on there, and it’s an incredibly cohesive listen despite the fact that we hear so many different voices thanks to it consisting primarily of remixes, and perhaps succeeds in part due to that as we get to hear different stories that all tie into the reminiscent feeling of wishing you could experience that Summer all over again, with the sound collage interludes forming a togetherness that is really touching and reflects on Fred’s collaborative spirit.
“peace u need” is yet another highlight, with perhaps the most strident attempt at making a classic 90s house piano banger considering the faint crowd cheers and vintage piano notes placed against a falsetto moan not dissimilar to Moby’s “Why Does My Heart Feel So Bad?” - at least that’s what it reminded me of. This track is a rare example of Fred providing his own vocals, longing for a relationship that has passed but hoping for amicability and fulfilment on both sides, given how lost he is without them but also how much they put into making it work, though this can also function as an analogy for nostalgia. “I let you take a piece of me” - your identity is found in memories you can’t revisit but also end up remembering, or dreaming about, on those particularly “quiet nights”. He teams up here with UK EDM duo Joy Anonymous here, who do not disrupt or honestly, really add anything new to, Fred’s distinct, stuttering style and greatly uses his sample of Snoh Aalegra’s 2017 track “Time”, fabricating a semi-duet between Aalegra and himself that really manifests in a creeping refrain of backing vocals that eventually overrides the entire track, leaving little of Fred’s vocals remaining as the “silence” - the distance from that period of time - “clouding” the mix entirely. The organic drums that rumble on occasion from the middle section onward as well as the tiny blips of vocal rendered as practically a sound effect shimmering just a bit too high in the mix, exemplify the album’s constant instrumental mirroring of the beauty of the humanity he experienced and that of the electronics he’s using to express it. Much like nearly all of the album, this is an incredible if not too accessible track, eschewing a pop structure for clearer and more concrete progression, including a weirdly eerie bass warp coming in at the last second to end that timespan for good. I don’t see it making a second week at all, but it’s absolutely worth your time, and thankfully, we have another one of my absolute favouritess from the album right up next.
#57 - “just stand there” - Fred again.. and SOAK
Produced by Fred again.., PARISI and Tobias Wincorn
ten days debuted just outside of the top five on the albums chart at #7, but that is still an impressive feat for an album that is simultaneously a remix compilation and almost sound collage, with “just stand there”, primarily a spoken word piece as Fred has explored a couple times before, coming towards the middle of the album. The piece pre-empting it, “.four”, has a car ticking aimlessly in a spreckle of rain, before a sample of SOAK’s spoken word piece “I’m Alive” featuring Gemma Doherty begins. SOAK is a Northern Irish singer-songwriter who broke out in 2015, whose track here is used mostly to have a spoken piece sat in the middle of wonky, heavily-manipulated vocal loops surrounding, circling the story being told, though it’s a different one from the original, as fragments from it are re-contextualised and at times looped to emphasise the awestruck moment of having someone tell you that she loves you. They stand there, amazed by the connection they feel and the appreciation of being able to “hear a world”, which makes them feel alive. There are many ways to interpret what now registers as a poem, in fact I have contemplated, given how introspectively focused some of the details seem to be, to if the “she” is the speaker themselves and it is a track about a confused sense of self-love and recognition of the world around them.
I love the pitch-shifted, distorted vocal leads cutting in as the song produces a slight bounce alongside more organic drums faintly set out to the left of the mix, I love the rise of pianos elevating the relative mundanity of SOAK’s poetry, the self-appreciation they find in observing other people live their lives and internalising that wonder, and especially the stuttering vocal that transitions the piece outside of that distorted bump of a kick into utterly transcendent territory, once the poetry steps way out of reality and into the surreal: “all four seasons happen in one day”, and whilst they’re already lovestruck, quite literally stuck in place because of their overwhelming feelings, it becomes unbelievable. Hell, it becomes too much to continue to try envisioning, and the song fades into echoes of vocal and synth that phase in and out, whilst they remain. Without anything, despite everything, “she loves me.” The fact that this is sandwiched between “fear less” with Sampha and “places to be” is really unfair, an emotional rollercoaster in the mid-section of the album that is as gorgeous as it is utterly overwhelming, which fits the nature of not just this song but the conceit of the whole record. It’s one of my favourite songs of the year, as if Fred again.. didn’t already have enough of those, and I cannot recommend his latest album more. Once again, this basically cannot last a second week, but God, it deserves to. Now, what’s next?
#38 - “Moi” - Central Cee and RAYE
Produced by Harry Beech and Eight8
…Cench, did you have to bring RAYE down with you? Central Cee, as he becomes more of a global star, has been swiftly shredding my goodwill for him, becoming increasingly gimmicky and embarrassing, seemingly taking his status as our biggest rap export to fuck around and make sure we’re never taken seriously in the genre again. We have an irrelevantly lovestruck French intro from RAYE here, which is atmospheric enough, but is completely rendered pointless by a flexing set of typical Cench verses where he talks about threesomes, drugs, the fact that you just HAVE to mention him when talking about drill - no, I don’t - and thirsting for random women in the public eye that he should just leave alone. He leeches onto the gay jokes again in the chorus, over a decent 2-step rhythm that transforms in and out of a stiffer drill beat, but the more telling line may be: “They gave me a fish, they ain’t teach me fishing”. Cench never struck me as ambitious, so the platform he has, largely off of TikTok virality and connections, I think scares him as much as it does me when it comes to how he represents UK rap. What’s frustrating to me is that I think he knows other people deserve the spot he has, but he cluelessly stumbled into it anyway and isn’t really willing to let it up at this point. Instead, he continues dropping these loose singles - allegedly from an album called Can’t Rush Greatness… okay - as he appears less connected, much less convincing and all the more deluded. Take a break, man, make something worth the pedestal you’re giving yourself and maybe stop relying on what got you there in the first place.
#4 - “The Emptiness Machine” - Linkin Park
Produced by Mike Shinoda
“This is not what I had planned. It’s out of my control.” One of the most successful rock groups of the century, Linkin Park, and the music world as a whole, suffered a terrible loss with the death of their co-lead vocalist, Chester Bennington, in 2017. Since then, the band has naturally been dormant on much new material but have played concerts, some in tribute, and have released troves of unreleased or rare material in compilations and reissues of their earliest records. There had been some concerning moments, namely the AI video for “Lost”, but the treatment of the posthumous material was respectful enough, at least as much as I can tell as I was never the biggest fan of Linkin Park. I would not say they have any great albums that are consistently fantastic all the way through, but what they do have to me are plenty of fantastic songs and even more fond memories dating back to my childhood, so regardless of my overall opinion, they definitely hold a comfortable place in my heart. So this reunion, which had been rumbling for a while, was probably going to grant strong opinions from me regardless of who it was and, ironically, I actually did not have strong opinions on new lead singer Emily Armstrong’s performance during the live shows. The livestream featured the Dead Sara frontwoman singing “Numb” which honestly did not seem all too different or interesting, though it clearly gave it enough of a boost for the song to return to #41 this week. She has a good voice, she was clearly present and has the range to perform much of their material, and since they’ll be recording and releasing new songs, she does not need to “replace” Chester.
Here’s the deal, though: Armstrong is connected to the cult of Scientology, which is extensively controversial, with Cedric Bixler-Zavala of The Mars Volta and his wife Chrissie on Instagram criticising the choice publicly by connecting her with the group and accusing her of being present at the 2020 trial of actor, Scientologist and convicted rapist Danny Masterson, which she admitted to and called a “friend”. Chrissie herself was a victim of Masterson, and with Chester’s history of being sexually abused as a child as he admitted to Kerrang! and NME, naturally this sparked outrage amongst some fans and music nerds in general who found that the choice of lead singer does not reflect Bennington’s principles, trauma, experiences and what he both fought for and expressed in his music, which has always been angst-driven and, at times painfully, honest. I tend to concur that this was a tone-deaf decision and though not all of his family have been open or even disapproving, his son Jaime has spoken against the decision and also about how band members including Mike Shinoda have ignored his concerns, and even that Linkin Park “fans” have harrassed him over his public opposition to the new singer. Armstrong confessed in a response that she did indeed attend the trial but was mostly dismissive of the contents or identity of what the trial actually involved, claiming to be unaware of details that at the time of trial, were - as allegations - readily available, especially to someone familiar with the then-alleged, now convicted.
I do not have to tell you that I have enjoyed music by bad people, I do not have to tell you that Armstrong is not the worst person ever, I do not have to tell you that the other members of Linkin Park I’m sure already have skeletons in the closet. I do have to tell you that this sucks. A man who formed some of my earliest memories of enjoying and connecting with music having his former band return, without the acknowledgement of his own family, alongside someone who defended - though not as publically as others - a man who afflicted sexual violence onto others, when Chester has been sexually abused and wrote earnestly about his overall trauma on the very records his band members played on, just sucks to me, and it seems many others, including Jaime and including the Bixlers. I cannot imagine how Emily Armstrong can guiltlessly cover some of his songs, and even if she relates them to her own experience as many fans have, Hell, many audiences have in general, including myself, I can’t help but feel a gross element to that. Those aren’t just not your experiences, they are experiences you worked in part to dismiss. For many, the apology will be enough, and that’s fine. Hell, I’m still going to listen to that new album when it’s out and it won’t stop me from relistening to their back catalogue which has some of my favourite songs of all time, like “Waiting for the End”, “She Couldn’t”, “Given Up” and a ridiculous amount of modern rock classics. Linkin Park are still a great band, and their legacy is not torn by this. But doesn’t it just suck?
You know what bothers me the most? The song’s fantastic. Armstrong’s not Chester, sure, but she already has an impressive chemistry with Shinoda, whose voice seemed off at first but blends perfectly with her more breathy rasp, and as a songwriter, Shinoda is in full pop form, with fuzz and reverb alongside some fantastically muffled drums leading in the echoing verses until a very typical but still anthemic chorus about falling victim to perhaps misguided hope and optimism leading you on in a moment of vulnerability: giving your life and receiving very little in return. It was a clever move to have Shinoda lead in, with Armstrong driving the song from the second verse on, but appearing in smokier, backing screeches during the first chorus, and once the full band comes in, whilst it doesn’t go as hard as it could, it’s still an incredibly full mix as you’d expect from Linkin Park. The band may have replaced the singer and drummer, but the core emotive thesis that LP have been working with for decades may still be here, and honestly, for as much shit as I will give her “apology” and public connections to Scientology, Armstrong kills it here. I’m a sucker for some good pop-metal and whilst this is far from their best, it’s a killer track, I’ll give it that, even if it probably won’t last too long past this week - though it’s 2024 so anything could happen - and it comes with a lot of baggage that I don’t think anyone was looking for.
For chart trivia purposes, as always: “Numb” returns after peaking at #14 in 2003 and returning to #20 in 2017. When it peaked, the Black Eyed Peas’ “Where is the Love” was #1. Its official mashup version with JAY-Z’s “Encore” matched the #14 peak on three separate occasions across late 2004 and early 2005.
Conclusion
I didn’t lie, did I? It was a fascinating week with an array of genres, artists, stories and even quality, but Fred again.. sweeps the competition here, getting Best of the Week for “just stand there” with SOAK and the Honourable Mention for “peace u need” with Joy Anonymous. Worst of the Week is more of a toss-up because the worst this week has to offer is largely just mediocrity, but I think Drake takes it by default with “Circadian Rhythms” as Cench wastes even more of our time with “Moi” featuring RAYE as the Dishonourable Mention. As for what’s on the horizon: The Weeknd, Playboi Carti, Tate McRae, Charli xcx and Troye Sivan with Dua Lipa on the new remix, it could be a lot at the top of the hit parade next episode so prepare for that. As for now, rest in peace to Will Jennings, Frankie Beverly and the legendary James Earl Jones, and I’ll see you next week!
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your-local-peson · 2 months ago
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Why do the most heart wrenching songs start playing at the worst times? Like, no! I don’t want to listen to sailor song while I’m think about all of my friends and how I’m leaving them when I graduate…
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sillystappen · 4 days ago
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🤡🛒🌞✅🔮👄💻🎬
Thanks, and have fun!
HOLA ok we got more lets fricken go!!!
🤡 What's a line, scene, or exchange you've written that made you laugh?
I like to think I have some good funny moments scattered here and there. But I think the award has to go to this line in Come On Over And Ruin My Life
He [Checo] listens and adds in the occasional "yeah?" to keep Daniel talking and giggles (?!) at some of the lame jokes he makes.
Idk I think the (?!) is pretty good.
🛒 What are some common things you incorporate in your fics? Themes, feels, scenes, imagery, etc.
I have answered this before BUT I HAVE MORE TO SAY. I spend more time focusing on my characters then I do a place or setting. I want you (yes you specifically) to connect and understand them and feel as they do as the story unfolds. I want you to see through the main characters eyes and understand the depths of them. The characters are little bits of my soul woven into words and more than anything I want people to see them and love them.
🌞 Do you have a preferred time of day to write?
Not really. Any time but the mornings to be honest because mornings are for dragging your ass to do things as you contemplate the meaning of your existence. Anyway if I think of where a scene or story goes, or even a new idea, I just write it asap so I don’t forget. Though most of my writing is done between 5pm and 1am.
✅ What's something that appears in your fics over and over and over again, even if you don't mean to?
Starting sentences with And, using the expression God a lot and swearing so much that I would have infinite amounts of community service. 
🔮What's your favourite plot twist you've ever written?
I know the answer but I can’t tell you. Clue: 🫦🌊
👄 Your OTP are having their first kiss. What song do you imagine is playing?
Oh shit well it really depends on the universe and story. But if we are being the most generic and ignoring the fact that Max has no music taste then it has to be either…
Nostalgic Love Rock by late night drive home
I love this song to death. I picture this song quietly in the background, maybe at Daniel’s place or just in a more public setting or perhaps Daniel has plugged his phone to Max’s speakers. It’s a sweet moment, one that’s just sharing gentle presses of lips and holding the other close then the kisses get longer but by no means heated. That feeling of finding home and your person just swelling around them. Lovely stuff. 
OR Sailor Song by Gigi Perez
Ok this you gotta picture it. It’s been building - this thing between them. They both know it, even if they’re denying the other and have never spoken a word about it. It’s a pull, it’s a force, perhaps they’re running out of time and neither want to lose this. Listen to the song and when it’s the chorus the second time it goes, “right now, oh won’t you KISS me on the mouth.” And at the word kiss it happens. The string has snapped and they’re both desperate, hands on each other's back, cradling the back of their heads as their lips move together. Like everything is falling into place. 
💻What do you write your stories on? Laptop, phone, paper, etc.
Ok so if I’m really serious about a story or concept it will go in my notebook. Just a plan and rough notes to help remind me. If I am out and about I may jot things on my phone but most of the actual writing is done on my laptop, which may I add is absolutely covered in stickers.
🎬One of your fics gets turned into a TV series. Which one is it and what network is it on?
Ooooh ok I think it’s got to be Is It Chill That You’re In My Head? and that bitch is a CBBC drama. (Idk American networks I’m British lol). It’s a little cheesy, got a bunch of ups and downs that Max and Daniel navigate together, but the audience love their chemistry and the side characters who always have some bs to say and in the end the series finale is their graduation. It’s not Disney Channel because that would make it too fake and cringey (no offence) and CBBC would have it be a bit more serious. Target audience is 13-17 year olds. I like to think it would be that one show clipped on to TikTok and then people find it like WOAHHHH what is it and where can we find it? Once the series is over perhaps Netflix can get some rights to show it to a global audience. The name would change from fic to show, and I think it would just be called Golden (BECAUSE IT'S A COLOUR I USE HAVE I MENTIONED I LIKE COLOUR).
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1ovemelikeasailor · 3 months ago
Text
Sailor pt.5
trying to update but math honors is kicking me in the butt so hard.
play the song.
"Sailor Song" -Gigi Perez
Summary: just when things were starting to be fine—it got worse.
Jenna Ortega x Female reader
Check out the other parts for more info!
-
No one's POV:
Monday
They both sat underneath the bleachers, some of the sun shining through.
Jenna carefully kissing Y/n, using her left hand to guide Y/n's face.
She slowly pulls away, big smile on her face.
"You taste like cherry." Jenna mumbles, both of their faces so close. Jenna looks at Y/n'a eyes then back at her lips.
Y/n looks away.
"It's my chapstick." She mutters back. Jenna grips Y/n's jaw making her look at her. "Yes, Jen?"
"Mmm, nothing." She lies down on the grass. "I had this terrible math quiz today—gosh, I scored so bad on it."
"Yeah? You study?"
"No I didn't—"
"Okay, whose fault is that?" Y/n smiles at Jenna.
"Um, yours. You were the wanted to sneak in during my studying hours—"
"You begged me to come over!"
Jenna giggles.
"I have no regrets!"
The bell rings.
Both teens groan, Y/n flops onto the grass beside Jenna.
"We should skip." Y/n suggests.
"You know I can't do that."
"I don't know why you take school so seriously—"
"Because it is important." Jenna sits up, straddling on Y/n's lap. It makes Y/n sit up. "You should start taking it more seriously too." Y/n doesn't answer, playing with Jenna's cross necklace. "Y/n?" Jenna questions. "Im being serious."
"Mhm." She puts her hands on Jenna's waist, leaning up close.
"I..have to go."
"Yeah?"
"Yes, Y/n." Y/n kisses Jenna's neck making her breath hitch. "Y/n."
"Hm?"
"Y/n—I have to go—" Jenna takes a deep breath trying to make her words sturdy as she says them.
"Im sure being late to one class won't hurt, Jen."
Jenna lets out a huff debating her options.
"Five minutes only."
-
"You're late miss L/n." Her science teacher explains as she walks in the class.
"Sorry, lost track of time." She doesn't look at the teacher just walks to her desk.
"Dude you're 20 minutes late." Mason looks at Y/n confused. 5 minutes were from Jenna, the other 15 were from Y/n just laying in the grass talking to herself.
"Yeah, well I just wanted to lay in the grass, you know?"
"Just laying in the grass? You sure nothing with Jenna?"
"Man when will you guys stop with that? I already told you a million times she told me to leave her alone. Thats it."
Y/n was lying straight through teeth, and to her best-friend. But, it was all for Jenna.
"Right, so Im suppose to believe that after you keep ditching us during our gaming time to go to sleep?"
"Hey, Im tired nowadays!"
"You literally sleep 24/7–"
"Thats a lie me and Jasmin are on the game until 6 in the mornings on Tuesdays and Thursdays."
"You guys have a schedule?! And why am I not invited?!"
"Because you suck at call of duty!"
"Thats not true I have 21 wins—"
"Jasmin carries you every-time!"
"So you show up to my class 20 minutes late, and want to just make a huge scene in the back of my classroom?" Their science teacher says. "Detention for you Miss L/n."
Y/n groans.
"Um, with due respect Mrs.Ramirez—"
"Detention for you too, Mason."
-
Tuesday
It was 2am. Y/n had snuck through Jenna's window for the 3rd time that week. She'd usually stay for a few hours until Jenna's parents got up.
"Okay, what's the origin of the x if you have to rotate the triangle?" Y/n held up one of the flashcards looking for Jenna's response.
"Shouldn't it be 0,0?" Jenna stops pacing in her room looking at Y/n.
"If..it wasn't rotating then yes that would be the answer."
Jenna groans.
"So, Im wrong."
"You're definitely not right—"
Y/n's laugh is cut off by Jenna tackling her onto her bed.
"You're definitely not right." Jenna mocks Y/n's tone. It makes Y/n laugh even more.
"Okay seriously we have to focus Jenna, the quiz is next week!"
“I need a break.” Jenna huffs, then lays her head on Y/n’s chest.
Jenna loved the way she felt right now, the way she felt you breathe in every breath, the way your chest went up and down, the way she could hear your heartbeat. She looks up at Y/n slowly inching her way to her lips.
Y/n begins closing the gap between the two girls, making their lips touch. Jenna adjusts her position getting on-top of Y/n. The kiss gets deep, so Y/n uses her elbows to support her getting up.
Y/n begins taking off her shirt, with the help of Jenna. She feels all over Y/n’s body, getting deeper and deeper into their love.
Jenna told no one about the way she felt with Y/n. The way their lips moved so in sync with each other, the way her golden cross necklace came off that night, the way Y/n touched her like no one has before, and the way each touch felt like heaven on her skin. She’d been told heaven would be without this—without Y/n’s touch, without their love. At this time Jenna wasn’t sure she wanted to go to heaven, if heaven would be without this. Be without her and Y/n. It was impossible.
-
Friday
There Jenna’s mother sat. On their couch scolding Jenna, her father as well. Her mother had caught Y/n and Jenna underneath the bleachers—not doing anything, just hanging out.
“We were just talking mom—“
“That girl is bad news! Everyone in town knows she’s gay.” Her mother yells.
“She walks around like it’s something to be proud of! It’s the devils curse!” Jenna’s father adds on, he paces in the kitchen.
“I don’t want you hanging out with her. She’s is the devil!”
“No she isn’t! You don’t even know her! How can you say?”
“Why are you defending a faggot Jenna!” Jenna’s father screams at the top of his lungs.
“You guys promote loving everyone and anyone! How can you say this? You say you love God, but God wouldn’t want this! This is horrible! You guys are horrible!”
Jenna’s mother scoffs.
“You know better, Jenna.”
“I hate you guys.”
Jenna stands up.
“And where do you think you’re going?” Her dad stops pacing, looking at Jenna.
“Why do you even care?”
She runs out the front door. She doesn’t stop for her mother or father’s protests. Jenna just keeps running to the one place that felt like heaven.
-
She knocks on the front door.
“Jenna? Hi, come in.” Y/n’s mother says opening her door more. She walks in. “Y/n’s up stairs I think doing homework!”
“Thank you, Miss.” Jenna runs up the stairs. She doesn’t even knock, running into your room.
“Mom—I told you—oh shit, hi pretty?” Y/n looks confused. “You okay?” She looks at Jenna’s panting, the sweat on her face, her chest going up and down. Jenna shakes her head ‘no’. “What’s wrong?” She takes Jenna to the bed sitting her down.
“Y/n.” Jenna’s eyes water.
“Whats wrong, Jenna? What happened?” Y/n’s voice gets more stern.
“My parents—“
“Shit, do they know?”
“No, they don’t. But, they saw us hanging out earlier and want me to stay away from you.”
Y/n sigh, shaking her head.
“It’s okay, Jenna. You do what you need to do. I understand.”
Y/n knew the time would come—the time where they couldn’t hide it anymore, and she wasn’t willing to risk Jenna’s future or family relationship for her and Jenna’s relationship.
“No, Y/n, no.” Jenna grabs Y/n’s hands interlocking them.
“Jenna they’re gonna catch on, if we stop now…they won’t ever know.”
“I need you.”
“Jenna—“
Jenna kisses Y/n. The feeling makes Jenna calm down after all the emotions she had just had run through her.
“I love you.”
-
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1ovemelikeasailor · 3 months ago
Text
Savior pt.3
Play the song or i stop writing AND KMS
"Sailor Song" -Gigi Perez
Summary: no matter how much Jenna wants to escape her sexuality, she can't, or can she?
Jenna Ortega x Female reader
Check out the other parts for more info!
-
No one's POV:
Wednesday
Y/n walked into her science class sitting by Mason.
"I dread this class." Y/n says to Mason putting her book bag down.
"You and me both." Mason groans. The teacher begins talking, starting the lesson.
About midway through Y/n has to use the bathroom. She raises her hand.
"Can I go to the bathroom miss?" Y/n asks putting her phone into her pocket. The teacher nods, and she's off.
She walks the schools halls to the closest girls bathroom. She eventually gets there walking extra slow so she doesn't have to go back to science so soon.
She pulls out her phone getting into the bathroom. Unconsciously, she walks into a stall going to pee. Just as she was she heard sounds from a few stalls to her right. She puts her phone in her pocket confused. The person sniffles.
Y/n knows whats happening. She has to say something.
"Uh—" She tries thinking of what to say. "Tough day?"
The sniffles stop. It's dead silent, as Y/n waits for a response.
"Something like that." The person responds. Y/n immediately recognizes its Jenna.
She whispers a curse word to herself. She can't be talking to Jenna Ortega. She's not suppose to. She a self centered idiotic bitch. At least—that's what she's suppose to be. Y/n knows she can't just leave her like this.
"You okay, Jen?" Y/n barely says loud enough. Jenna's heart flutters in a weird way from the nickname. She doesn't like it—she's not suppose to like it.
"Don't call me that."
Y/n sighs.
"Got it." Y/n walks out of the restroom forgetting about Jenna.
Jenna doesn't want her help, and it's clear, so why should she keep trying?
-
Thursday
It’s Thursday, which means Jenna has cheer practice.
The cheer practice that was already over about an hour ago.
But still, she waited. She waited in your guys spot.
She could say she waited there for a-bit, but it wasn’t a bit, it was hours. It felt like a-bit to her.
She stayed there for who knows how long. She didn’t even know why she was there—I mean she knew, she just didn’t want to.
She stares at the spot you sat at when she scared you, she smiles a-bit. It immediately drops, rubbing the golden cross necklace on her cold hands.
No. She says to herself. Stop.
She gets up after a few hours of just day dreaming, not looking at anything else but the part of the bleachers she saw.
She looks at her phone seeing missed calls from her mom and dad.
She was in deep shit, for sure.
Jenna got up still looking—she looked for Y/n. She knew she shouldn’t, but she also knew she couldn’t help it.
-
Saturday
Y/n sat there at church, her usual spot. She knew the part of the wooden chair like the back of her hand. Shes sat there for half of her life. That spot, that same exact spot.
Y/n feels the wood, remembering every part. She had explored it countless times she got bored of the pastors speeches. She couldn’t help it.
Jenna sat in her regular seat which was across the seat Y/n sat in. Jenna didn’t look at Y/n at all, trying to keep her promises to God. This isn’t Jenna, this isn’t her at all.
It’s just a phase…, right?
She pays attention to every single word the pastor says—you could say she was the exact opposite of Y/n. She wore a nice white simple white dress going down to her calves. Her mom smiles at the pastor taking every word in.
This was the life she’s suppose to live. A God surrounding life, marrying a man, having kids, staying at home, being a mans service.
…right?
Eventually church gets done after a few hours. Y/n finally stands up stretching, she yawns as well making her mom hit her in the arm. She immediately stops yawning and straightens up.
From afar, Jenna’s watching. She watches as Y/n’s mom hits her arm for being sloppy. She lets out a laugh, smiling. She see’s her roll her eyes at her mom when she has her back turned.
“Jenna?” Natalie calls out to her daughter.
“Yes, mom?” Jenna snaps out of it, looking directly at her mother, as she stands up.
“What’re you smiling at?” She raises her eyebrows “A cute bo?.” Natalie lets out a grin, it makes Jenna’s shoulders fall.
“Oh, uh, no. Just thinking about a moment with the girls.” Jenna responds trying to bypass the moment.
-
Monday
Y/n sat on the highest bleachers, looking over her high-schools football field.
It was after cheer practice, Y/n knew that, but she didn’t care.
Her headphones blasting music as she wrote some stupid essay for her english class.
She looses her attention when she feels a presence sit next to her. She doesn’t have to look or take her headphones out to know who it is.
Jenna doesn’t say anything, just looking at Y/n.
Finally after 3 minutes of Jenna just starring, Y/n takes off her headphones.
“Yes?” Y/n looks at Jenna annoyed.
She doesn’t reply to her, just looks at eyes
Gosh was she in-love with those eyes?
She shouldn’t be, right?
Jenna shrugs, which makes Y/n scoff. She starts packing up her things. She puts her backpack over her shoulder.
Jenna doesn’t want her to leave, she has to do something—
“Wait.” Jenna grabs Y/n’s wrist. It makes Y/n and Jenna look at each other from the contact.
This is weird. Jenna thinks. Its not weird because its suppose to be weird, its weird because it’s not weird. Does that even make sense?
“What, Jenna? Now you want to talk? Last time I remember I was queer kid you felt pity for, right—?”
“Y/n—“ Jenna’s grip tightens. “Im sorry.”
“It doesn’t matter, Jenna. I don’t care.” Y/n pulls her wrist out of Jennas grip and walks away.
Jenna doesn’t chase her. She shouldn’t. Her heart truly wants to run after to her and apologize a million times, but she doesn’t.
She stands there, not budging.
-
Tuesday
“I just walked away from her.” Y/n shrugs telling Jack what happened as they both play games.
“You think…you think she likes you dude?” Jack questions.
“Jenna—no. Not a chance.”
“You sure? Because it sounds like she’s obsessed with you.” Jack points at out.
Y/n does realize it is quite weird what Jenna’s doing. But there has to be another reason for it, not because she likes her.
“Probably some other reason. Every-time I see her she wears a cross, she doesn’t like me—and even if she did, I wouldn’t like her. She’s Jenna Ortega.”
“You’re probably right, but you know, you never know.”
-
Later Tuesday
It was 10pm.
Jenna couldn’t help it, she couldn’t help how she felt. After hours of crying in her bed, and after hours of praying to God, nothing worked. Why was she feeling like this for a girl she barely knew?
Maybe it was because of the two words she said. The two words she said that day when she felt like the world was crashing down on her. To simple words that meant to the world to her, yet she wished you didn’t say them.
Or maybe it wash the way you looked her the eyes while you said. The way your eyes said a million words.
So, here she sat, underneath those damn bleachers at 10pm on a school night.
I mean—what was she doing? Its 10pm. It’s dark, scary, the animals are out.
“So, tough day?” A voice scares the shit out of Jenna
“What the—“ Jenna holds her hand over her heart. It was racing until she saw who said the sentence. She looked at Y/n as she laughed from Jenna being scared. “Not funny.” Jenna cracks a smile.
“You were pretty scared there.” Y/n looks at Jenna still smiling from the moment.
“It’s 10pm, dark and scary. Of course I’d be scared.”
“You’re right, it’s 10pm. What’re you doing here?” She looks at Jenna for an answer.
“Waiting.”
“For?”
Theres a moment of silence. It was Jenna debating in her own head. She couldn’t hide it anymore, at least not from Y/n.
“For..you.” Jenna swallows the big lump in her throat from that answer. Y/n looks at Jenna, then back at the ground. “What’re you doing here?”
“Well, I was just looking.” Y/n clears her throat avoiding Jenna’s eyes.
“Looking for what?”
Y/n doesn’t answer, she stares at her own shoes.
“I was..looking, for you.”
-
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1ovemelikeasailor · 3 months ago
Text
Sailor pt.1
PLEASE PLAY THE SONG
"Sailor Song" -Gigi Perez
Summary: Jenna wouldn't mind falling in love with Y/n L/n, if it didn't mean falling in love with a girl. Y/n wouldn't mind falling in love with Jenna Ortega, if it didn't mean falling in love with Jenna Ortega.
(Slight smut eventually)
HIGHSCHOOL!AU
Jenna Ortega x Female reader
-
This story is about two girls, who couldn't love each other because of fate that it's always supposed to be Man and Woman.
No one's POV:
It was a normal day at Riverbank High. Y/n walked into her science class, which she very much hates. She hated the work, the way the teacher had tried to teach it, the exams, the way she just didn't...get it.
"Another lame day I suppose." She sits herself down next to Mason, then goes her book-bag.
"It's always a lame day when you have Mrs.Ramirez teaching!" Mason responds trying to act happy. Y/n lets out a small silent laugh. "What're you doing tomorrow?"
"I mean, I got church tomorrow—"
"Your mom still making you go to that thing?" He laughs.
"Sadly, yes. Fortunately I don't have to wear a dress."
"She does know..you're gay...right?"
"Yes, but as she says 'God's love is eternal.'" Y/n reenacts her mom's words.
"You believe that?" Mason starts getting his notebook out while looking at Y/n.
"I think so." She shrug doing the same thing and getting out her notebook.
"Well, maybe after church we could hang? Maybe with Jack or something?"
"Probably. We could finally watch Despicable Me 4 together."
"You are so right!"
-
Saturday
It was the morning of the next day.
"Bright and early! C'mon Y/n let's go!" Y/n's mom bangs on her door. Y/n groans in response remembering how'd she stayed up all night playing ps5 with Mason and Jasmin
"I hate video games." She mumbles finally getting up.
"Y/n!—"
"Im up! Im up and alive!" She shouts back. Her mom runs off to her own room starting to get ready.
Y/n puts on a simple white shirt with some loose—but not too loose jeans, a belt goes with it. As soon as that's over she rushes to the bathroom, brushing her teeth and combing her hair.
"Mom! Im done!" Y/n goes downstairs to her mom and dad rushing to get in the car.
"Okay perfect. Let's go."
-
Y/n had looked around the church building maybe just trying to find someone she knew, or maybe she was just bored. Y/n believed her mom, "God's love is eternal." The thing is others didn't. People knew Y/n was gay at that church too, they didn't like it very much. But who are they to say anything? Who are they to judge? They call themselves christians, they loved everybody, they preached that God loved everybody, but what happened then? Was Y/n someone God stopped loving because she could love a girl the way shes 'not supposed to'? Who were they to judge..?
Church is finally over—but of course her mom wants her to stay to get to know new people. There were always new comers to her church, and every-time her mom would want her to get to know them. Her mother always said "Love your neighbor."
"You already know Y/n, go find—"
"Go find some new people, make friends—mom I know." With that Y/n walks off rolling her eyes. Why was she even here? Why was she supporting a community that didn't even accept her for loving a different gender than what was 'normal'?
Y/n decides to walk over near a few of the scriptures in the church.
"Shit—" Y/n covers her mouth looking at the statues. "I mean..shoot!" She awkwardly smiles at the statue. She looks back to her right seeing Jenna. Jenna Ortega. What the hell—I mean what the heck was she doing here? Y/n knew Jenna was a church girl, but never her church she'd come to. I mean you could tell she was a church girl too. The golden cross dangling around her neck—the way she dressed, the way she lightly wore makeup because God made everyone in his image. Her bible in hand talking to someone else—"That's not good." Y/n mumbles seeing Jenna beginning to walk over to her.
"Y/n?"
"Yeah?" She looks at the shorter girl.
"Thought I recognized you."
"Oh, uh, yeah." Y/n shrugs.
"Didn't take you for a church girl—"
"What do you mean?"
"You know what I mean. Anyways, um, bye." She walks away. That was weird. Jenna has never talked to Y/n—well, I mean there was that one time in algebra in grade 9 but she had to talk to Y/n. They were partners.
"Bye." Y/n mutters looking at Jenna already halfway across the room. She goes off the find her mom knowing this was already a waste of time.
-
Monday
Y/n walks with Jack to your guys math class. She begins telling him about what happened at church the other day.
"Okay thats weird. A straight church girl—not to mention arguably one of the most popular girls in our school talking to you? A gay—"
"Im gonna stop you before I sock you in the mouth." Y/n puts her hand on his chest making them both stop in their place. He just nods. You guys both begin walking again and when you both look up you see.. Jenna Ortega. Of course. She walks right by the two laughing and giggling to her 3 friends. Y/n and Jack watch as she walks all the down the hall.
"Stop staring weirdos my gosh—!" Jasmin slaps both of their arms. "What has gotten into you guys? You guys do realize thats Jenna? Lord, give me the strength."
"Okay—first of all I was starring to see if she would look at Y/n—"
"Why would she look at Y/n—"
"Um, maybe because she walked up to her at church—"
Jasmin laughs loudly.
"Jenna walked up to Y/n...at church? The straightest, meanest, religious girl ever, walking up a gay girl that plays videos games until 3 in the morning—"
"Hey! You do that too!"
The bell rings.
"Shit! We're late! Thanks a-lot, Jasmin." Jack rolls his eyes as you guys begin to walk again.
"You are so welcome—and we're talking about this later by the way!" She shouts as we run off to class.
-
Later Monday
Jenna played with her golden cross necklace, as she sat her silent room. She let out a deep sigh lying there..just there.
"Jenna, come on hun! You're gonna be late for cheer practice!" Natalie, Jenna's mother shouts from downstairs.
"Coming mom!" Jenna rushes grabbing her cheer bag still fidgeting with the necklace.
"Whats wrong? You okay, Jen?" Her mom asked before grabbing her coffee and phone.
"Um—yes. Everythings okay. Im fine."
They both get in the car, driving to Riverbank high.
-
Y/n sits underneath the bleachers headphones blasting. It was now 6pm. She just need to get away—from everything, everyone.
Unfortunately for Y/n, someone followed the sound coming from her headphones.
"Y/n?"
"Shit—shoot!" Y/n jumps up, headphones sliding off. This makes Jenna slightly laugh.
"Sorry. Didn't mean to scare you." Jenna makes her towards Y/n, under the bleachers.
"It's—fine, it's okay." Y/n clears her throat putting her headphones around her neck.
"You sure? You seemed a little scared there." Jenna giggles at the memory. It makes Y/n smile.
"Okay, I wasn't that scared." Y/n scoffs, the smile never leaving her face.
"You sure? I mean your headphones flew off—"
"Okay can we stop talking about that, okay?" Y/n laughs. Oh shit, shes laughing...with Jenna Ortega. Jenna. Ortega. Holy sh—
"No promises." Jenna smiles. "So, quick question..what do you happen to be doing underneath the bleachers?"
"Better question, how did you find me underneath the bleachers?"
"I asked first."
"Okay, fine. I was just listening to music to get out of the house."
"Tough day?"
"Uh, something like that." Y/n shrugs. "Now..what are you doing here?"
"Well..cheer practice." She sits down next to Y/n.
"Then why are you here and now with them?" Y/n points to the group of girls practicing. Jenna takes a deep breath.
"Needed a break I guess." Jenna shrugs. They both look at each other. This was all weird. She'd never be this nice..to anyone, let alone a gay nerd. Jenna finally comes to senses realizing whats happening. "Um—Im gonna go. Bye." She walks away—fast.
"Oh, yeah, bye." Y/n looks up to see her rushing away. There's something different about Jenna, why is she doing this?
-
Wednesday
"I don't know man—it was weird."
"So what..you like her now?" Mason asks, while I tell him about the situation.
"What? No! She's Jenna—the girl whose made fun of me for being gay—and Jack for being himself. Obviously not. I am her number one hater."
"Sure, why were you talking to her like that?"
"It was a in the moment kind of thing Mase. I don't know what you want me to say—but I don't like her." She shrugs.
"Okay believe what you want to believe." He shrugs.
"Shes the straightest girl we've ever met. Even, and thats even if I did like her we'd never—"
"Never say never, L/n."
"Okay, whatever. Now tell me about this girl—"
"Her name is Sonia. I think I kinda like her Y/n." Mason replies, he directs his eyes to the tv.
"Kinda? Tell me—and be for real, do you actually like her?"
"More than I'd like to admit." Mason looks back at Y/n with a small smile on his face.
"Holy sh—"
"Language!" Y/n's mom shouts from her room.
"Sorry mom! Holy shoot! You're in love." They both laugh.
-
Friday
"So you're stealing my spot now?" Y/n looks at Jenna who's sitting underneath the bleachers.
"Uh—oh, yeah—sorry." Jenna looks away from Y/n.
"It's..cool." She sits right by Jenna. They sit in silence for at least 2 minutes before Y/n decides to speak up. "Tough day?" She mutters, barely loud enough for Jenna to hear.
Jenna finally looks at Y/n.
"Something like that." She nods. Y/n nods back. It takes awhile and some courage for Y/n to speak up again.
"Im—Im here."
Jenna looks over.
"What?"
"Im here." Y/n responds nodding. Jenna looks her straight in the eyes, as hers begin to water.
"Thanks." She whispers. Y/n just nods.
For the rest of the hour they both sat in silence—just in each other's presence.
-
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1ovemelikeasailor · 3 months ago
Text
Sailor pt.6
Last part i think.
Play the DAMN SONG
"Sailor Song" -Gigi Perez
Summary: I sleep so I can see you, cause I hate to wait so long.
Jenna Ortega x Female reader
Check out the other parts for more information!
-
No one's POV:
"I love you, too."
"If you loved me you'll let me continue to be with you." Jenna says tears coming down onto her face.
"Jenna." Y/n sighs, she holds Jenna who's crying onto her shoulder. "I can't—you're risking it all for me. Your family, your image, everything Jenna—you being you—"
"This is being me! Me loving you is being me!"
"Jenna—I—we can't! Your parents they said no."
"I don't care what they say, Y/n I love you—I remember when—I remember when I saw you in church that first time since awhile..I looked at you, and saw everything. And you know, that scared the shit out of me. How could I be me—if I loved a girl? How could God forgive me? But, when I saw you under the bleachers and the way you talked to me—Y/n I'd risk it all for you. I do anything for you, Im in love with you! I don't care if you're a girl and Im not supposed to."
"Jenna—I love you so much. But, this could mess everything up for you."
"I don't care. I love you." Jenna says, and before Y/n can respond she kisses her.
There's a knock at the door. Y/n gets up, opening the door.
"Yea, mom?" Y/n looks at her mother standing in her doorway.
"Um, Jennas parents are here. They are asking for you, Jenna."
Y/n looks at Jenna who has her face in her head.
"Shit." Jenna closes her eyes sighing.
"What's going on?" Y/ns mother looks at her daughter confused. She waits for an answer.
"Uh, nothing mom—"
"Y/n L/n."
"Jennas parents kinda found out about me and Jenna hanging out. And they don't like it obviously because Im gay—"
"Because you're gay?! Why does that matter to them?" Her mother snaps, now starting to get angry.
"They don't want their daughter hanging out with a queer kid mom! It's obvious."
"Jenna!" Jennas mother's voice could be heard from downstairs. Jenna gets up off Y/n's bed walking over to the door.
"I love you." Jenna kisses Y/n.
They pull away.
"I'll—I'll see you later, right?" Y/n mutters, looking her Jennas dark brown eyes.
"Yeah. I love you."
"I love you too, Jen."
Jenna walks downstairs, looking at her parents.
"Jenna—"
"Let's go." Jenna takes her parent's arm, out of Y/n's house.
-
Y/n's POV:
It was Monday.
That last time me and Jenna had talked was yesterday. She said her parents had yelled at her on and on again.
I was scared. She didn’t care, she was fearless.
I don’t get it. If God doesn’t like homosexuality, then why send me Jenna? Why send me her? Why send me a girl that feels like my soulmate—?that is my soulmate. Why send someone that Im not suppose to have, but feels so wrong if I don’t have her?
Jenna wasn’t at school the whole day. Probably her parents telling her not to go to school, so she doesn’t see me.
It was lunch and I was with Mason, Jasmin, and Jack.
They don’t know about me and Jenna. They probably won’t ever know.
“What’s got you so down?” Jasmin puts her drink down directing her eyes to me
“Nothing.”
“Doesn’t seem like nothing.” Jasmin scoffs, “Seriously what’s wrong?”
“Jasmin, it’s not—“
My phone starts ringing. I pull it out of my pocket, then look to see who’s calling
Mom.
Gotta answer that. I push it close to my ear.
“Y/n?”
“Hey mom, what’s up?”
“Y/n..”
“Yes? Mom whats going on? Im at school right now.”
“Im coming to get you.”
“What, why? I mean—Im glad I have a quiz today, but what happened?”
-
I see my mom’s car pull up, I immediately get it still confused.
“So, mom what’s going on? Don’t tell me I have a dentist appointment!”
“Y/n, I need to tell you something.”
Shit, she’s serious, what happened?
“Okay.”
“This morning—before school Jenna had drove to that bridge by the convenience store—“
“The one by that one nightclub, right?” My mom nods her head. “Oh, what about it?”
“Y/n—she parked her car—she jumped.” My own mother had tears in her eyes.
I don’t say anything, just confused.
“Mom, what are you saying right now?”
“Y/n—Im so sorry, baby.”
“Mom—this isn’t funny.”
“Y/n.” I open the car door. “Y/n!” I begin running towards the football field, ignoring my mother’s protests.
She’s okay. This is just a dream.
No one’s POV:
Y/n runs toward the bleachers, going underneath them.
She knew exactly what—who she was searching for. She repeated that it was ‘just a dream’ over and over so many times in her head again.
-
Sunday
It was Jenna’s service. Who knew there would be such a miserable day.
She watched so many people walk in and out of the church. She watched as they greet her mom, say sorry for her loss—then leave.
Over and over again she watched. She watched while she sat on the furthest wooden bench from the casket.
It was too much.
“Hello.” Y/n doesn’t turn her head. She recognizes the voice. “I know..that you know Im not your biggest fan.” The person lets out a huff. They analyze Y/n, the way her eyes were swelled, the way her tie was messed up, the way they knew she hasn’t moved an inch since getting to the service. “But I know..you have to see this—“ Jenna’s mother slid a piece of paper to Y/n.
For once Y/n moves, she takes a look at the paper. Her eyebrows furrow confused. “Because she wrote it for you.” Y/n grabs the paper slowly, then puts it in her pocket. “One more thing, Im sorry..for your loss.” Jenna’s mother finally gets up off the bench, then walks away.
Y/n doesn’t know what to think.
-
Thursday
“Y/n—I love you, but you have go to school—please. All you do is sleep, Y/n—“
“Mom, you don’t get it—you really don’t.” Y/n marches back up the stairs.
“Y/n where are you going?!”
“Im going to bed!”
“It’s 8pm!”
Y/n falls onto her bed, she looks at her desk. The paper Jennas mother gave her, still folded up.
She can’t open it. She can’t do it.
Her eyes slowly shut.
Sleep was the only place she could see Jenna—in her dreams.
I sleep so I can see you, cause I hate to wait so long.
-
The piece of paper;
“Anywhere is heaven with you. So, Im not scared anymore. Rather be in hell with you, then heaven without. I love you more than words can say. You are my savior, even when I thought God was.”
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