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#STAY AWAY FROM MY WIFE U BITCH
kittypopkpop · 1 month
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“i thought you didnt believe in love,”
“youre right. that was the wrong word, because love is odinary. mundane. and you, stella, youre extraordinary.”
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d3stinyist1red · 27 days
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ʏᴀɴᴅᴇʀᴇ ʟɪɢʜᴛ ʏᴀɢᴀᴍɪ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ
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Yan light who met you in highschool, the last year
Yan light who becomes your study partner, helping u and ur dumb lil brain
Yan light who starts realizing how cute you were, but never had a crush on u (he did he just never wanted to admit it)
Yan light who now has a crush on you after him trying to convince himself that you're not his type,
Yan light who now helps you with more than studying, whenever you don't have a pencil, he'll give it to you eagerly, whenever you want something from Amazon but your too broke, he'll buy it for you, whenever your too lazy to work on assignments, you call him and he'll let you copy
Yan light who is now your friend rather than study buddie
Yan light who sits with you during lunch, not bothering to hang out with his other popular friends, telling you that he prefers you
Yan light who stares at you during class, thinking of all the things you could do to him before shaking his head, and covering his blushing face
Yan light who convinces his sister that you're his gf, and that's why you keep coming over to his house.
Yan light who now is by your side 24/7, walking you to classes, holding your backpack for you as you ramble about the girl u don't fw, walking you home, and more
Yan light whose house you go to for a study session, but you knew it was just gonna turn out to you rambling about drama as he watched you with heart eyes, hand on your thigh
Yan light who convinces you to stay over, saying "N/n, it's too dark out, just stay here yeah?"
Yan light who you ask "Light, where am I gonna sleep?"
Yan light who smiles, and says "In my bed, where else, sweetheart?" As if it was the most obvious thing in the world
Yan light who cuddles you throughout the night, arms around your waist as he whines when you try to pull away from him
Yan light who now tells you to go to the college he's going to, giving you puppy dog eyes as you refuse
"Sweetheart, come into the college I'm going to, you don't wanna be separated do you?"
"Honey, what do you mean your too dumb? Just copy off me, my love."
Yan light who makes you go to his college, smiling at you when you finally tell him "Fine, I'll go to your college."
Yan light who now barely lets you go to your own house, "Am I not good enough for you, love?" He asks with tears in his eyes like bro I just asked u if I could go home
Yan light who cooks and cleans for you, "Honey, do you want me to make you some pasta for tonight?" He saids all giggly, his sister just gags in disgust bc why is her rat brother acting like a middle school girl in love
Yan light who is literally 3 seconds away from smashing the TV in his room because your busy playing GTA rather than him, he's literally half naked, wanting you to touch him and your playing GTA tryna run from the cops?! How dare you, just watch, he'll get rid of that fucking ga-
"hey wife, can ya bring me my water?" You ask, you gave him a glance making him perk up, knowing that if u called him wife, he'll do anything for u
"Okay! ♡" What was he thinking about again?
Yan light who finally got the death note, and told you "If you fucking even look at someone else other than me, I'll kill them."
"wife, you barely even let me see my own family"
Yan light who Misa finally meets up with
"Light! I'm your classmate, and you dropped this book!" Misa said, showing the book as light makes her follow her to his room. You were inside the room, playing rock paper scissors with ryuk the homie
Oh yeah that lil bitch light showed you the death note and practically said he'll rip anyone's skull if they even bother to look in your direction, genuinely u weren't even shocked bc ur wife was just like that fr fr but anyway now ur homies with ryuk
They both walked into the room, and Misa was quick to glare at you. 'Light is my love, and I am his so why is this homewrecker all up in his bed like that!' was her train of thought, ready to launch at you before seeing Lights dark glare on here
"Don't even fucking think about it, now why are you here?"
They talked and Misa told him if he dated anyone but her, she'll kill them.
"thats...too bad, I'm already y/ns wife"
Yan light who is your wife that kills anyone who gets between you both <333
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GUYS LOWKEY IMMA MAKE A YAN DEATH NOTE AND YAN JOJO BIZAREE ADVENTURE STORY ON MY WATTPAD LOLOLO
YAN TOWN, YAN MC DONALDS WORKER, YAN CELEBRITY, AND MORE COMING OUT SOONOJFBYUSDYUHjn
HOPE YALL LIKED THIS ONE I LITERALLY WAS HALF ASLEEP
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hxzbinwrites · 8 months
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Hey!! Saw that u were taking request <3 I was thinking that an Alestor x wife!reader being a power (but absolutely terrifying) couple would be soooo cool, like maybe they already knew each other from when they were humans, and Alestor is just 10000% a simp for his wifey lol. Hope u like it!
Alastor x Wife! Overlord! Reader | Forgiveness |
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Warnings ⚠️: Cussing, Death, Killing, Mentions of Alastor being a Cannibal, Reader makes STUPID DECISIONS
In the Pride Ring is where all of the sinners and Overlords alike mingle. The uppermost ring of Hell and the closest to Heaven. That’s where some of the most feared and powerful beings live. Two of those entities being Alastor, the Radio Demon, and (Y/n), the Jazz Demon.
Together, they rule their districts with an iron grip. While some Overlords team up, like the Vees, Alastor and (Y/n) were the first to do it. Well, it makes sense really, especially because they were close during their respective times alive on Earth.
——————
Three gunshots were heard that fateful night. One ending a mans life by his hand, one ending the witness’s life by his hand, and one ending his by justice’s hand. No more Bayou Killer, but he took two more lives before he went. Awful, sick man. Good thing he’s in Hell now…
Alastor hissed as his back hit the pavement. His squinted eyes took in his surroundings, he was in Hell. Hmm, no shocker there. What was a shock was seeing the body next to his.
“Ugghh” They groaned, sitting upright on the pavement next to him. They locked eyes. It was (Y/n). Before Alastor could even speak, she pounced on him, pushing him back into the pavement.
“You sick son of a BITCH!! YOU KILLED ME!! SHOT ME LIKE I WAS AN ANIMAL FOR YA NEXT MEAL!!” She yelled, shaking him back and forth by gripping his collar. His collar looked identical to hers, and he tuned out her yelling, he noticed her attire. She was now wearing a black suit with red and white accents, one that looked like a reverse image of his. Except a few details weren’t the same, hers looked more feminine, but also had less harsh edges to it. She looked more elegant while he looked more harsh.
He then looked up to her face, she had red eyes and long, silky black hair, with red underneath. He looked to the top of her head and noticed two fluffy, black ears. They were currently pressed to her scalp, a clear indicator of her unhappiness at the current moment.
“AND TO THINK, AFTER ALL OF THAT BEGGIN, YOU WAS JUST DYING TO GET ME ON YOUR RADIO SHOW!! WELL LOOK AT US NOW, MR. ALASTOR. LOOK. AT. US. NOW. WHAT EVEN ARE YOU, YOU SICK FREAK. EVERYONE KNEW THE BAYOU KILLER ATE FOLKS. IF YOU WERENT SHOT, WERE YOU GONNA EAT ME?? WAS I GONNA NOT EVEN BE ABLE TO HAVE A BURIAL NEXT TO MY PA, CAUSE YOU ATE ME!? OH LORD HELP ME!!”
Alastor rolled his eyes, feeling no remorse for the doe that whined above him. (Y/n) was a famous musician in Louisiana, particularly in Jazz. Alastor had begged her to come onto his radio show, play some tunes for his devoted fans. She agreed, but that night Alastor didn’t show to the studio. She heard shouting in the woods across the street from the building, stupidly she went to investigate. She saw the oh so famous radio host, and with a bang of a shotgun the other man was dead. Probably in Heaven now. Trying to stay silent, (Y/n) tried to back away before a branch snapped, like a doe her eyes widened before she darted away, only to be shot right in the heart and drop down to the ground. She heard another shot faintly in the distance before she felt the wind brush past her as she fell.
“My dear, I apologize.” Alastor said, gently grabbing (Y/n)‘s hand. “It was never my intention to make you my target. I knew that if word got out about my….hobbies….that my reputation would be ruined. No more radio show.”
“You can apologize for the rest of eternity” She scowled, smacking his hand away before standing up,” You’re a MONSTER. Leave me ALONE. Hopefully someone down here will be nice, but I’m not taking no help from you”. (Y/n) finally walked away, leaving a very annoyed Alastor sitting there.
———————
About 20 years later
Alastor was a feared Overlord now, rising the ranks out of seemingly nowhere. Even with this newfound power and respect, (Y/n) still wanted nothing to do with him. She was famous in her own way. Music was not very abundant in Hell, and she profited off of that. She had little to no competition in the music industry. Becoming an icon of Hell, her name was in everyone’s mouth, making Alastor yesterday’s news, which irked him to no end.
‘I need her.’ Alastor initially thought,’ with someone as influential as her now, having her on my side will make my power increase tenfold.’ But after many times of asking over the years, he just yearned for her admiration. Not only to be on his side, but by his side. He didn’t know where the newfound obsession came from, but Alastor knew he wouldn’t stop until he brought her to him.
Alastor made his way to her huge studio, basically a small turf at this point. Without ever fighting, she’d managed to become a little bit of an Overlord, just not to the extent she could be called one. He made his way up to her penthouse, knowing the way by heart since this is not the first time he’s made a visit for an alliance.
“What Alastor.” (Y/n) asked, not even looking up from her sheet music she was writing.
“Hello my dear!” Alastor said,”lovely to see you again! I just miss you so much darling!”
“Miss me from what?” She said, turning around to meet his eyes,” we were aquatinted when we were alive, and then you killed me. What exactly do you miss me from?”
“I just miss seeing you.” He said in a softer tone,”Please (Y/n), you must realize that your death was an accident. I was never planning to hurt you. I was never planning to do anything to you.”
(Y/n)’s head tipped down, her ears pressed to her scalp,”but you did, Alastor. You killed me.”
“My dear….” He said, getting closer slowly, like she’d dart off at any given moment, just for him to not see her ever again. “My dear, I cannot imagine the pain you’ve gone through. I know it’s been a few years now, but that’s a few years you could’ve still been alive. Found a husband, had a better music career, just lived. I took that from you, and I’m…..I’m sorry.”
“I know Alastor.” She said, hugging him. Even though he hated when people touched him, she did not know this, so he internally decided to let this one time be the exception. “You know I can never fully forgive you….but after all of these years, I think I can at least try to have you in my life….but if you screw up ANY, I’m gonna kill you. I don’t care if you’re an Overlord or whatever the hell you’re doing, I will kill you like you killed me.”
“Hmm, fair enough” He shrugged, breaking off the hug as he sat down in the chair across from hers.
———————
Present Day
“So hold up” Angel said, looking at the two powerful Overlords,”He literally killed you and you were like, ‘oh well, I forgive you’. What the hell (Y/n)?”
(Y/n) was a true Overlord know. Once she let Alastor back into her life, he taught her the ways of toppling Overlords. She didn’t posses near the amount of power that he had, so he did the gruesome part for her. Building her musical empire (and later on having to shoo of Vox who begged her to join his up and coming ‘Television’ idea after Alastor shot him down).
“Oh I’d hardly call it forgiving.” Alastor said,”I get constantly reminded about it every day, multiple times a day. You wonder why it took us 60 years to even get engaged.”
(Y/n) just rolled her eyes, crossing her arms over her chest. Alastor smirked, looking over at his wife.
“Well, what else was I supposed to do? The man kept coming by begging me every week for TWENTY YEARS!! Lovesick puppy if you ask me.”
Charlie squealed, hugging onto Vaggie. “Look Vaggie! That could be us one day!!”
“I hope not” Vaggie said,” A freaky cannibalistic overlord and his delusional companion. I’m fine with staying as us.”
“No Vaggie! I meant married! Wouldn’t that be fun!! Married for a long time!! Forever!!”
While Charlie was helping Vaggie stop short circuiting, (Y/n) and Alastor just looked at one another with a knowing glance. Alastor took her hand and kissed her knuckles, smiling up at her.
“Thank you again my dear, for letting me back into your life. I’m eternally sorry for what I did.”
“I know you are Alastor, plus I’d be dead already now regardless.” (Y/n) giggled,”I still don’t know what overcame me that day. I mean, who lets someone back into their life after doing that!! I am glad I did though. It’s like you said in that apology, I have a husband, I have a huge music career, but I’m not living, technically, but it feels like it!!”
Alastor chuckled,”that’s right, my precious doe. Now, I am off to go grab lunch for the both of us! If you excuse me, I shall make a trip down to the Cannibal District, and then over to the grocery store for your food!”
———————
Word Count: 1,560
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h4m1lt0ns · 7 months
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HEARTBREAK SYNDROME.
episode thirteen :: RIBBONS & TEA.
꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ pairing ︴various drivers x y/n
꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ genre ︴social media au / irl snippets
꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ summary ﹔the groupchat returns, and while lewis is feeling a bit funny, y/n casually gives everyone a heart attack and calls it a surprise.
꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ face claim ﹔ wonyoung jang (28)
꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ warnings ﹕ excessive cussing, none.
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lewishamilton
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♡ liked by pierregasly, charles_leclerc and 9,149,394 more. 
lewishamilton 📍🇬🇧
tagged: y/n, tommyhilfiger.
3,294,204 comments.
username goodnight.
username since fuckin when???
username had to double check if this actually lewis’ account
username no roscoe in sight, oh he’s serious serious 😧
username watch ur back sir hamilton v3rstabben is *allegedly* loosing his mind 🫢
username now why are you 🫵 a man 🤨 posting MY wife
username imagine being in a situationship w y/n y/l/n 😩
username ur so fucking lucky mercedes boy.
[liked by lewishamilton]
username i SCREECHED when i opened insta what the fuck.
username babe js propose to her atp.
username I KNOW the dilf gc is in SHAMBLES rn.
username oh u brave BRAVE 😧
username 49392919283 meters away from MY girl sir lewis
→ lewishamilton can you even count that far?
→ username oh ur bullying ur fans now?
→ lewishamilton idk am i?
→ username “i”. enough said.
→ username no bc why is he typing in all lowercase 🤠
→ username y/n’s influence is crazy
username but when EYE say they’re dating.
username fernando alonso is typing…
username oh you’re so father for this 😩
landonorris ..d-dad?
→ lewishamilton ..son?
→ landonorris what are we.
→ lewishamilton you have been promoted, you are now one of my elite employees 😁
→ landonorris thanks dad 🫶🏻
→ username LEWIS WHAT THE FUCK.
→ username LANDO OPEN UR FAT MOUTH U BITCH
→ landonorris ﹫lewishamilton cult lh are bullying me
→ lewishamilton okay let’s leave my son out of this.
→ username YOUR WHO?
→ lewishamilton that’s enough internet for next month
username WHAT IS COMMENT SECTION.
username IM SOOOOOOOO.
username im assuming we too have to accept lewis as our dad if lando is doing it 🙄
username ARE WE GONNA IGNORE LANDO’S COMMENT????
→ username ﹫y/n SAY SOMETHING.
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y/l/nestate
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♡ liked by lewishamilton, charles_leclerc and 13,593,204 more.
y/l/nestate behind the scenes 🍾🎀 fun things coming very soon ⭐️🩷
4,395,394 comments.
username she’s SO fucking beautiful what in the FUCK
username wowowowowowowowow
username one chance PLEASE
lewishamilton pretty
→ y/n heyyyy
→ username 3 Y’S. GIRL STAND UP
→ username i genuinely think we lost her.
→ username enD MY SUFFERING I CANT 💔💔💔
username FACE CARDDDDD 💳💳💳💳💳
username PLS SAY THE ALBUM IS COMING.
username me if you care
username SHES SO 🎀⭐️🩷🫧
username BOUNCING OF THE WALLLLLLSSSSS
username if she drops an album out of nowhere i will bang my head against the wall 🩷🩷🩷🩷
mercedesamgf1 mercedes doll 😍
→ username LEWIS I KNOW ITS YOU MF.
→ username log out of this acc lewis 🔥
→ username you too need to stand up 🫵😧
→ username let him stay down it’s Y/N Y/L/N
→ username point made 🤷🏽‍♀️
username bratz doll irl 🧎🏽‍♀️
username 😍😍😍
☆ IMESSAGE with ; BOARD OF DIRECTORS.
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honey badger: avengers assemble.
honey banger: i have easily the most important tea to spill today.
y/n: “hear yee! hear yee!” ahh text
girlfriend kika: LMFAO
babygirl alex: hear yee 😭😭😭
honey badger: it’s about max
girlfriend kika: i ain’t laughing no more 🗿
chal eclair: what does he want
chili!: no bc after the shit his team pulled i don’t think i wanna hear from anyone abt him
angel carmen: wait is it important
honey badger: it’s abt the billboards incident
princess george: oh.
my baby lando: oH?
yukino: 🔪?
honey badger: might be necessary this time
alabono: he is personally involved isn’t he 😐
honey badger: yep.
my baby lando: wait oscar needs to see this
MY BABY LANDO added PAPAYA BABY #2
papaya baby #2: i love it here already
wifey lily: oh i’m so sat
honey badger: i was ‘hanging out’ with max before the suzuka race to make it seem like we’re chill. i wasn’t there to hang w him i had a mission.
my baby lando: okay okay
chal eclair: 🤨
honey badger: i managed to get ahold of his phone then i waited until he left his drivers room
honey badger: then i switched my phone case with his to make it look like i was on my phone while i was going through his
y/n
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y/n: i would like to apologise, visa cash app driver, i, indeed was NOT familiar.
girlfriend kika: LET BRO COOK 🔥🔥🔥
chili!: oH HE IS COOKING ALRIGHT
honey badger: so i go through his messages and find a deleted group chat. a group chat with the employees that red bull fired.
chal eclair: OH HELL NOOOOO 😭😭😭
honey badger: he INSTRUCTED them to burn the billboards. specifically the ones with y/n on them.
princess george: i know he thought this was IT
alabono: bro thinks he’s him
papaya baby #2: who let bro cook
honey badger: not only that
y/n: THERES MORE?????
angel carmen: hELLO?
honey badger: he made sure to tell horner to cover for him
PIERRE GASLYYYY: no fucking wonder the fia’s investigation was wrapped up SO quickly
yukino: and their corny ass apology said it all
yukino: “team principal christian horner apologises” since fucking when
babygirl alex: ^^^^^^ REALLLL
y/n: setting up a zoom call rn we need to brainstorm
y/n: im also adding lew, seb and nando because they’ve been PlISSSSEEEDDD
chal eclair: “lew” and “nando” and i’m still waiting on my cute nickname
y/n: be grateful i love you and your fuck ass pasta 🙄
papaya baby #2: i love it SO much here
chili!: don’t get too comfortable oscar
y/n: i’m not gon tell you to leave that baby alone one more time 🗣️
papaya baby #2: thanks mum 🫶🏻
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y/n and y/l/nestate
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♡ liked by lewishamilton, carlossainz55 and 44,294,293 more.
y/n and y/l/nestate surprise lol 🎀 champagne, sex & anxiety 7/10 🥂 considering the amount of people i worked with on this album, it’s truly a fucking miracle that i managed to shut the fuck up abt it and not say anything so here u go i guess 💗🩰⭐️ no more sad songs LETSFUCKINGO !!!! i personally call this one my mona lisa and i BEG u to love it as much as i do when it comes out 🍾🤍🏹 also no twitter jumpscare this time ur welcome lmaooo :)! love u to death 🧸🫂💘
9,204,394 comments.
theweeknd my excitement exceeds the english language.
username CAN YOU BE NORMALS ABT ALBUM DROP JS FOR ONCE (1) ☝🏽 PLS.
username WAHTS FOIBG ON ????????
username WHAT THE FUCKKKKKKKK Y/N
username wHY THE FUCKCKCKCKC IS SHE STILL ALLOWED TO DO THIS SKSKSKSKSKS 😭😭😭😭😭
username “no twitter jumpscare” AN INSTAGRAM JUMPSCARE ISNT ANY BETTER Y/N
lewishamilton honoured. proud of you doll 💗
→ y/n proud of u ml 🩷⭐️
→ username “ml” GIRL.
→ username OMFG ﹫mercedesamgf1 YOUR EMPLOYEES ARE FLIRTING TAKE THEM TO HR ITS ILLEGAL
→ username HR 😭😭😭
→ username GET THIS MALEEEE AWAY FROM MY WIFE 💔💔
username ITS MIDNIGHT MATE DID YOU LOSE IT
landonorris WHAT.
carlossainz55 WHAT THE HELL
danielricciardo IS THIS HOW I FIND OUT
username ARE WE ALL CONFUSED RIGHT NOW
charles_leclerc UHM YES??????
username YOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
y/l/nrecords love when y/n drops music out of nowhere 🔥
→ username LMAOOOO
→ username REALLLLLL
username i’m so genuinely shocked i’ve been sitting here in silence for the past ten minutes
→ username you’re a stronger person that me i screamed so loud my neighbour broke my door bc he thought i was being murdered
→ username DAWWWGGGGGG IM WEAK 😭
username WHY IS LEWIS TAGGED ON ME & YOU
→ username SOMEJENE ANSER MER
username THESE SONG NAMES ARE GIVINGGGGG
pierregasly what in the ratatouille bullshit.
francisca.cgomes WHAT THE HELL 🔥 🔥
lilymhe YESSSSSSS
alexalbon ??????!!!!!!!!?!?!?!?!?!!!?!!
mercedesamgf1 i literally cant wait 🤩
username yesss gaga
oscarpiastri we’ve all been on this call for four hours and we don’t even get a heads up ??
→ username CALL??
→ username “WE’VE ALL” ?????
→ username FOUR HOURS HELLO SIR.
username what in the literal fuck is going on.
username ,&/&;&2929(92&:’fwlsoqlfjje MA’AM.
username STOP THID MADDNEDS LDLE
username Y/N PLEASE
scuderiaferrari ?????????
username i can’t do it. i js can’t do it man.
username BANGING MY HEAD AGAINST THE WALL
username WHY WIULD U ANNOUNCE IT LIKE THAT
username Y/N ISTG.
☆ IMESSAGE with : Unknown Number
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xxx-xxx: hey
xxx-xxx: can we talk?
1K notes · View notes
lorarri · 5 months
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★ . . . 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 , 𝐋𝐇𝟒𝟒
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summary , being forced to go to a gp was not something on Y/N's 2023 bingo card but who knows maybe she will create a friendships that could help her thought this tough time
pairing , step dad! lewis hamilton x fem! young teen! reader
pervious part | series masterlist | main masterlist | f1 masterlist | lewis hamilton masterlist | next part
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MOTHER Lewis has got us VIP tickets to the Australian gp Isn't that exciting!
Y/N but I have an archery comp on that weekend
MOTHER dw about it I've pulled you from the comp you can do the next
Y/N are you fucking kidding me you pulled me from a comp to go watch you boyfriend's race what the fuck?!?!?!
MOTHER language young lady first of all he my fiance and he is gonna be your step father soon
Y/N he is not gonna be my anything as far as I'm concerned and the only way I am going is if you drag me there kicking and screaming so fuck you
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MINJI babe where is u at?
Y/N @ the Aussie Gp 💀 ... girl don't u remember me telling you guys about this 🙄
HANNI We do but your mom just called asking if we knew where you were 😭😭
Y/N wtf would you guys know where I am 😐
DANIELLE cuz aparently she can't find you and she thinks you are trying to catch a flight out of the country to avoid spending time with her and lewis 🫣
Y/N tf is this bitch on? I would never put that much effort into her let that be know first and for most 😝 second of all I'm hanging out with Max and Daniel 😌 so dw I'm not trynna skip town 😔
HAERIN Max and Daniel? as in like Red Bull's drivers Max and Daniel as in like Mad Max 😡 and big dick Danny ric 🤠
Y/N ew 🤢🤢🤮🤮 never say that again 🚫 but yes that would be them 👍
MINJI ... proof or it never happened 👀
Y/N
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happy now?
HANNI okay but how did you even meet?
Y/N walked off to have a smoke and ran into them and started talking
DANIELLE ain't your mom gonna be pissed though?
Y/N why?
HAERIN cuz your created a better bond with Max and Daniel then what you have with Lewis
Y/N tbh I don't really fucking care Lewis seems like an alright guy ngl but I don't like how my mother is forcing me to spend time with him it's awkward and weird escpially since my dad is refusing to answer my calls or texts and everytime a ask my mother about it she says "maybe he is busy sweetheart" and "well look at it this way it will be the perfect opportunity to bond with Lewis" so yeah I have 0 shits to give rn anyway I need to go time for the race max says I can watch in the red bull garage
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NANA (EX WIFE) my plan isn't working I thought by forcing you to stay away Y/N and Lewis could bond but I think she hates him more now
JUNHO (EX HUSBAND) no shit sherlock btw I'm coming to pick Y/N up this weekend she staying at my house till she has to go back to school
NANA (EX WIFE) is that bitch gonna be there?
JUNHO (EX HUSBAND) yes my girlfriend is going to be there and I am going to show you the correct way of introducing your kid to your new partner and that starts by telling them the truth about why you marriage ended in the first place and since you refuse to tell her I will read
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pensbridge · 4 months
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1 thing that the Bridgerton siblings all have in common is that they are going to act in the most innane, chaotic, borderline animalistic of ways.
Anthony: speed runs toward Daphne and Simon without thought to pry them off from fucking in the garden only followed by bitch punching Simon square in the face; schemes to find the "perfect" wife (one who fits his checklist) to only later realize he feels for her sister....but doesn't stop there, and continues his plan as if he doesn't realize that his perfect wife is actually right there, therefore he should not have to attempt to marry the other in his escape that can only be described as a self-destruct endeavor to not accept happiness; ruins the plan AT the wedding; also smells his future wife as she passes (and gets caught); the gazebo..nuff said
Benedict: is generally a little shit (see him at dinner tables, in large gatherings, and just around his siblings); criticized an artist in front of their own work. he wasn't aware, which just adds to the chaos. walks into spaces without a clue to what is going on before him (i repeat: criticizing the artist's painting; also his chaotic arrivals at sibling councils calling for immediate action); in an ongoing frustration over his artistic expression that is meant to be expression of his feelings; proceeded to get high and took the whole bottle of substances; almost jumped out of a window fr
Colin: proposes to a woman he barely knows in a mad dash impulsive instinct that evades kissing her; walks out from the dinner with his fiancé without notice on the sole basis that he does not want to hear his future in-law sing badly. yes she is indeed terrible, fyi. failed engagement -> impulse flee from the country; ahh (sigh) he is feeding the ducks; loudly proclaims his "mis-affections" for a woman who is actually his future wife, then lends himself to help her find a husband like he doesn't see the big yellow sign flashing to reveal himself as the spouse in question
Daphne: is ½ of the couple about to desperately fuck in the garden; previously was involved in a scheme to fool the people of their surroundings that she was on her way towards marriage; ran away from a prince who was about to propose to her. I understand, but we are in dire, desperate times here. fell for the garden-fuck buddy, and became obligated to marry him, but he doesn't want kids oh no.........married him; in the "I know something my brother's fiancé doesn't know" club of 3 (peace-out, staying out of the drama; c u @ the wedding)
Eloise: trots into a room full of her mother and siblings LOUDLY inquiring how a lady becomes pregnant; accuses a maid of writing a gossip column as if she does have much time on her hands to observe and overhear the secrets of those in her surroundings, and further write about it with an internal sassy voice like she doesn't have chores and duties to tend to everyday to survive; does everything in her power to avoid men, marriage, and anything to do with the opposite sex... except one (which is scandalous no matter how cute/innocent). tears apart her bff's room in haste after the shock effect of Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen
Bonus) 'Mother' Bridgerton: nearly asked a servant to lie on her in need for her "garden" to be tended to
Here's some more events from Season 3 that is added on to Bridgerdums malfunctioning:
Benedict: insults someone again/talks without thinking; generally has no idea what's going on; shit's (ship's) going on right in front of his eyes and he has no idea (tbh this is everything that I expected from him and this is EVERYTHING (he's chilling); so obvious trying to escape the desper-taunt; sooooo obvious trying to chat it up with L.D./Aggie Danbury, my girl
Colin: where do I start...playing 'Where's Waldo' with his bff for half an episode; LYING LIAR WHO LIES, 17 cities...you went to 17 cities?! (i'm just shocked); perhaps we should go somewhere more private??? /rushes to apologize with full sentimental remarks (good); rushes to offer the help as previously mentioned; kisses his best friend to help her out it's only fair; "OF COURSE!"...back on the hunt for pretty bff; *ooh watching bff eat a pastry, malfunction ahh* -> buys the pastry; the entirrreee hot air balloon scene (he waits, he rushes...he's definitely a fight mode with mental gymnastics flight in the lead up); can't speak in the middle of a ball; downbadism yellow sheet drop; crashes a proposal, cuts in the dance, literally so obvious, *angry* "perhaps that is for the best"; chases down a carriage ON FOOT; the (in)FAMOUS carriage; chaotic proposal
Eloise: she hates socializing with men and she's gonna shout it; cracking jokes with The Plastics; oops loud queen...let the cat out of the bag; /forever the accuser (now w/Cressida, former queen of The Plastics); she HATES society, guys, I don't think you understand; "MY BROTHER?!???" x2 (3x04 deleted scene + 3x05 tick tock Lady Featheringdown)
Francesca: the most sane, but living up to her name; dun dun dun piano; introvert escape room expert; finds a man without talking to him; rushes out of the new boyfriend hang to play her piano
Gregory: fell and broke his arm being nosy AND faaaaaailedddd; dummy was just fascinated by a balloon
Hyacinth: she's gonna be trouble, we just know, ok/always always always right
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neopuppy · 1 year
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for jeno HARD HOUR teehee could u idk write him mean and kinda evil maybe idk he seduces his step mom who is married to his dad
warnings. stepcest, mommy kink(omg…….im sorry…..), breast play, teasing, Jeno hates his dad- act surprised.
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Jeno really can’t stand his step-mom.
Not because she’s awful or even a bitch, no.. in fact, she’s perfect. Too perfect for his nasty cheating low-life asshole father who could care less for his mother, now ex-wife.
“Ah Jeno, it’s so nice to have you home again.” Your sweet cheerful voice interrupts his fuming thoughts, the back of his head instantly relaxing into the mound of your breasts as you circle his neck and lean down to hug him. “You hungry? I stocked up on all of your favorites.”
Nuzzling back into your warm embrace, he sighs, eyes drifting shut to inhale the notes of peach and cucumber wafting from your freshly cleansed skin. Supple soft radiant skin he knows you spend meticulous hours of the day exfoliating, lotioning, rubbing with oil only for your useless husband to caress his old disgusting rough hands upon.
“Missed cooking for me?” He mumbles, shifting to bury his nose in the column of your throat to fully immerse himself in your savory scent.
“Look at how skinny you’ve come back, that school not feeding you properly or something?” You reprimand, patting over his flat stomach lightly. “I have to make sure to keep you full for the next couple of weeks before your break ends.”
Nudging the top of his head with your chin, you continue into the kitchen, still in your silky pajama set. Something short, hardly covering your abundant chest, dad wouldn’t have his young little trophy wife any other way, always ready for the taking.
Jeno can only imagine how many mornings his father has snuck up on you making breakfast, bending you over to fill you up before heading to work. Fucking bastard doesn’t deserve to even touch you, let alone any of those fake moans you must practice to please him.
“Are you worried about me?” Jeno’s chair scratches across the kitchen tile, slowly lifting up to get a better look at your buttcheeks squeezed by your panties, innocently bent over in search of a pan. “Maybe the school cafeteria doesn’t serve anything that satisfies my hunger.”
“I’ll fix that,” too distracted on your hunt for the right spices and oils, you fail to notice how close Jeno’s gotten, hovering behind you with a smirk as your robe slips from your shoulder. “You’re the one who wanted to go to school so far away. You could be eating my home cooked meals everyday if you’d just stayed local.”
“…is that so?” A grin teases at his lips, halting your hand from adjusting your robe to push it down left to fall unceremoniously at your feet.
A shiver runs up your spine sensing his breath fanning across your shoulder, palms smoothing down your waist to your hips. “Jeno?”
“I’m hungry, mommy.”
“Jeno? Wha—“ your hips stay locked in place, shoved against the kitchen counter by the stronger ones behind you knocking forward to trap you.
“I missed you too, mommy.” Shoving his hips forward, Jeno’s girth slots between your flimsily covered ass, rutting quickly to lodge between and create delicious friction against his cock. “You know what I really missed?”
“Je-Jeno.. what are you..”
“Last summer when you moved in, each different ridiculously tiny bikini you wore around the pool; your fat tits barely contained, just how dad likes it huh? I guess we have that in common.” Keeping you held against the counter with his hips grinding in circles against your ass, hands find way to your shoulders, swiftly dropping down the straps of your nightgown leaving your breast to bounce out freely. The morning crisp air circulating around the house breezes past your nipples, hardening the buds instantaneously.
“Sweetie, this.. this isn’t right, your dad—“
“Is an asshole.” Jeno bites, cupping your breasts that overflow in his hold, the fat squeezing between his digits pushing out a deep groan from deep within his chest. “Fucking decrepit dickhead, bet he can’t even get hard from this alone? I’ve seen that erectile dysfunction prescription.. can’t even take care of you and fuck you right can he, mommy?”
To emphasize his point, Jeno’s hips swerve, fucking forward vigorously for the thick shape of his rod to slam between your panty covered behind, nightgown bunched up over your hips from his incessant humping. “Can’t tell me a pretty young thing like you doesn’t miss it— hours and hours of getting the life fucked out of you.”
The kneading and massaging at your chest accompanied with your step-sons evidently large size has you panting, hands gripping the kitchen counter for some relief. Shaking your head, you try to ignore the way your hips rut back to find his, biting down a moan from escaping. “Jeno, please.. sweetie, d-don’t.. your dad..”
A rough slap under your breasts silences you, the fat rippling beneath Jeno’s strength as he delivers another slap, working in succession to bounce and smack each with his chin perched over your shoulder rambling on and on about how good you look like this. Perfectly pliant, needy, face full of ecstasy all thanks to your step-son.
“Dad has great taste, I’ll give the old fuck that.” Jeno snickers, teeth digging into the vein lining the side of your throat. “Had me hard as a rock fucking into my fist all summer, tried to get over you by filling up any hole.. couldn’t get your pretty body off my mind.”
“Jeno, baby.. w-we can’t. Your dad, he’ll.. he’ll kill you.”
Breath staggers against your neck at the term of endearment, hips fucking against you in earnest. “You think I fucking care about him? What about you? What about the mess you’ve made mommy? How can you do this to me? Tempt me all the time with these perfect fucking tits and expect me to leave you alone now?”
“I’m sorry, I’m s-sorry Jeno.. I didn’t—“
“Baby, I’m your baby.” Jeno pinches your nipples roughly, pulling and slapping forcing a loud echo of skin on skin to barrel across the kitchen. Jackhammering his hips faster against your ass. “Tell me to stop, don’t fucking tell me what dad wants. You tell me to stop.”
“B-baby… I-I…” a sad pathetic cry sounds, dropping forward loosely as your thighs tremble erratically, held up only the rough grip on your chest undoubtedly leaving behind marks of nails and bruises.
“Must be true.” Jeno grunts, shoving your underwear down. “Like father, like son.”
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morn1e · 12 days
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thank u 4 the 1like on that post. here r my dude headcanons that r mainly set 4 my au bcuz i am feeling nice&ok 2 share. do know that this is just how i personally interpret him. u can see him however u want, i am just but a random guy on the internet&he is a fictional guy made out of pixels.
- prepare 4 the real name of the century bcuz this is fucking stupid ermm what the sigma. ok so his real name is tanner parkley dude jr. .yeah his surname is genuinely dude. nickname “the postaI dude” derives from highschool where he worked as a postal worker during the summers(&was mocked 4)&since nobody liked him they gave him the name. was mainly called TP or dude by few that were friends bcuz he really hated the names tanner or parkley.
- born on feb 29th bcuz he does not deserve 2 have a bday every year🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕
- not schizophrenic but is mentally unstable 2 some degree bcuz he does deal w very violent&intrusive thoughts on which he acts out on sometimes&has anger issues
- physically wise has struggled w chronic migraine since a young teen. his 20s were his worst years bcuz the migraines were @ their worst/most frequent+the fact he was a drug addict&did not properly take care of himself as he should+the ex wife nagging constantly did not help whatsoever. now that he is nearly 40+medicated they have greatly decreased but attacks still occur bcuz he still does not look after himself enough as he should
- was born in florida but the family moved around a lot(bcuz they could not b bothered 2 pay rent). eventually settled down in utah but moved 2 arizona 2 live in paradise
- am set on thinking he was a middle child. 3 sons in the family. is not in contact w any1 bcuz despises them all bcuz they were a nightmare growing up. 2 brothers sort of turned out like dude(substance abusers&broke). mom is still around but he does not dare talk 2 her bcuz she always was over religious&turned a blind eye 2 dads abuse
- only family he is in contact w is uncle dave! only guy who was genuinely there 4 dude growing up. dudes father really despised him hanging out w dave bcuz he was sorta known as a scummy scammer. dude as a teen helped out dave w his various schemes&whatever so much so 2 the point it costed a permanent offense on his record where it hindered dude from barely being able 2 finish high school+absolutely NO hope of getting into college bcuz nobody wanted him there. i think this is also a factor why he has a hard time holding a job(main factor is that he is just. a piece of low value shit)
- met the bitch through her sister bcuz he was dating her sister 1st. thought bitch was hotter than her sister so chose her. got married in las vegas in 1 of those cheesy stupid wedding chapels
- dude genuinely did love the bitch @ 1 point but in the end they were incompatible&they were both pieces of shit 2 each other. w age they just drifted away completely where they just Could Not stand each other. i believe sole reason they stayed 2gether was bcuz of tax benefit&could not afford a divorce or smth
- champ came into his life randomly 1 day while he was still in utah&champ as a stray came up 2 his trailer randomly. he got fed&bcame dudes companion from then <:)
- in my au dude is mainly clean off of crack bcuz when he moved into paradise got so pissed @ the crack dealer prices that out of sheer petty&principle said 2 himself he would Not smoke that shit b4 butchering most of the dealers. still has relapses but mostly manages. has turned 2 weed mostly
- has cried 2 nickelback @ least 3 times
- thinks too much pepper is genuinely considered spicy bcuz he is so white guy&cannot handle spice whatsoever
- fav desserts r smth like bread w butter&sugar or graham crackers w milk bcuz he grew up dirt poor&these were the only desserts they could afford
- does not rly have a fav alcoholic drink bcuz will drink abt anything just so it gets him fucked up as fast as possible. but if dude had 2 choose would like whiskey+coke or vodka+tonic cocktails. does not like red wine bcuz of how it tastes+it triggers a migraine
- knows how 2 cook meats like briskets&ribs&steaks&shit where they turn out rather really nice <:)knows how 2 cook overall but gets take out most of the time bcuz cannot b bothered 2 cook as the process is tedious as shit
- genuinely knows how 2 program&just has quite a lot of computer knowledge in general<:) if he was not dead set on not listening 2 any1&cared enough 2 b like every1 else in society dude could make a fine living off of developing websites 4 ppl on the web
- oh em gee now abt marnie❤️ the way they met is that he socked her in the face @ a concert in some crappy bar in paradise&after seeing how unbothered she seemed from the blow instantly knew she was different❤️yay❤️
- b4 him&marnie were official marnie was his mistress bcuz by the time they grew closer dude was still married. still cheating but by that time his&bitch’s marriage was in literal shambles that they just did not care abt the other having lovers
- got 2gether w marnie bcuz the sex was awesome&she makes 200k yearly from being a general surgeon, stayed bcuz she was his person all along.♡
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i-cant-sing · 1 year
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No but Sukuna what the actual fuck are you doing with baby Fushiguro 😭. That’s a minor and what you just did as called grooming😭. No but imagine she is old enough to understand it was not a game and well Sukuna is not that good. In her place I would just chop my finger off cause there’s no way I’m marrying a pervert
You call it grooming, he calls it "an insurance that will keep you protected under his wing and also work as pissing off everyone in existence"💀💀💀💀
I mean honestly, I understand where you're coming from but believe me, Sukuna is not at all attracted to you like that. In his mind, he's just marrying you so that you're bound to him forever. But actually consumating the marriage? Nah, he'd never do that. Nuh uh. He'd never do something vile to you. No no, when he says best marrying you, he's just gonna make you his wife that has to stay by his side forever, and maybe when he actually does have kids with other curses or concubines from his harem, you could take care of them from time to time.
Your actual purpose as his wife is nothing- just be within his sight so he always has peace of mind that you're safe and secure and he does absolutely adore your crackhead behaviour.
He won't sleep with you, even if you were the one to initiate it. No, he'd simply push you away, tuck you under the covers and snap his fingers to make you fall asleep. By far, the most PDA he's ever shown is pats on the head/cheek and very very rarely, a kiss on the cheek. That's it.
He just wants to keep you safe and by his side all while messing with your family, with Zenin clan, with Gojo, Nanami and every single yandere possible.
PLUS you don't have to ever worry about dating because honey, just because Sukuna isn't sleeping with ya, doesn't mean anyone else gets to.
And as for the whole "I'll cut my finger off if you don't get rid of this ring" threat goes, it'd be wise if you never try to threaten the king of curses. Bitch you'll be trapped in his domain expansion for quite some time as he goes on and on about how fucking stupid you are for endangering humanity like that because if u hurt yourself, he'll heal you and then kill like half the population of the world.
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iris-sistibly · 6 months
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So we are officially half-way through this whole series, this isn't as intense as the previous episodes and I just generally enjoy seeing the Hong family having a taste of a simpler life.
📍Though I wanna slap Hae-in's mom so hard for still being such a bitch at the family who took them in when they have nowhere else to go, and the way that she resents Hae-in for having a REAL mother and daughter bond with Hyun-woo's mom instead of her? The audacity! Like she constantly treats Hae-in like crap, she didn't care when Hae-in fainted and worried more about her son being uncomfortable in their current situation, it's kinda confusing to me that she wonders why Hae-in never treated her the way she treats her MIL. But then again, she's a narcissist and a gaslighter, what am I expecting? The Baek family are much better people than me, because if I were them and someone disrespects MY family in my OWN home, I would have kicked her out this instant and let her sleep with the cows. Shout-out to Aunt Beom-ja for calling her out for the nth time.
Edit: I just remembered this now but I'm disappointed in Hae-in's dad. He cared so much about his daughter when they found out about the divorce, but couldn't even defend her when his wife was bad-mouthing her. I'm not expecting anything from mama's boy Soo-cheol, and I get that the irony of his character is him being the head of the family only by name but in reality, he doesn't have a spine, but he could have at least tried for Hae-in. Then again, the only people who defended Hae-in were Hyun-woo and Aunt Beom-ja. 🤷
📍Hae-in is basically the only person who can put Soo-cheol in his place, but she also has a soft spot for him. The way she almost patted her brother's back to comfort her and then stopped herself because she probably found it cheesy (I mean, they're asian siblings iykyk), but stays beside him without saying anything and just letting him cry was actually heartwarming.
📍Hae-in realizing that the mp3 player in Hyun-woo was actually hers and they've already met when they were teenagers 😭 how I wish Hae-in just told him straight that it was hers so poor Hyun-woo didn't have to make some random excuses so she wouldn't feel jealous or upset (he knows a jealous Hae-in is terrifying). Speaking of which, the text message scene was killing me, the way they messaged each other (even though they didn't actually send it) was so husband and wife coded y'all can't convince me that they're divorced. I wish they'd truly reconcile already and become lovey-dovey once more!
📍While it's pretty clear that they're still very much in-love with each other, part of me feels like Hae-in is pushing Hyun-woo away so she could free him from all of these burdens and when the inevitable happens, Hyun-woo could move on. While it's true that she's still hurting with everything that happened between them, I also sense some guilt in her, I mean she's not stupid, she knows what kind of crap he'd been through while living with her family. Meanwhile, Hyun-woo willingly stayed by her side, accompanying her in medical check-ups, helping her entire family to regain what had been stolen from them, protecting Hae-in without ever asking for anything in return (not even asking her to take him back) is just...ugh! It pains me, but their current situation will surely bring them closer to each other and I would love them to have that moment where they'd just talk about them.
📍I'm not surprised that Soo-cheol is not Geon-u's father, but aren't y'all curious to know who is? And I do have the feeling that Da-hye loves Soo-cheol for real, but she hasn't realized it yet. Still faithfully waiting for that day when she'll finally help the Hong family and get rid of that witch and her walking red flag of a son. Also, I feel like Grace would also testify once these scumbags go into trial, and I hope that happens soon.
📍Speaking of the devil's child, now that the show is slowly revealing the back story of Seul-hee and Eun-seong, basically they're saying that the latter is only acting under his mom's orders who by the way he resents so much but still works with her anyway? I thought he was cunning, turns out he's actually a stupid cunt. I mean, imagine going through all of this bullshit only for us to find out that his ultimate goal wasn't to take the entire Hong family's wealth like her greedy birth giver but to take Hae-in for himself as if she's some kind of a prize or trophy that he could get after ruining her and her entire family? If that's so, then he is really an idiot. If he thinks that Hae-in would desperately crawl to him because they're poor now then he can continue to dream. Hae-in would die without Hyun-woo but would rather die than be with Eun-seong. I do have the feeling that this bitch will use grandpa Hong to black mail/negotiate with the family and god forbid bring them back to the mansion (again, wtf), perhaps the only person who would be dumb enough to take the bait is probably Mama Hong because she's well...dumb too. And no, I don't care if he cares about Hae-in being sick, he's disgusting.
📍The thing that sets him and Hyun-woo apart is how they treat Hae-in, Eun-seong sees her as some kind of an object that he could snatch even if she's already married to someone else, he doesn't take no for an answer, has crossed her boundaries multiple times and only cares about getting her. While Hyun-woo treats Hae-in like an actual human being, yes he made mistakes and hurt Hae-in in the past but he sucked it all up and is constantly doing right by her. He respects her boundaries, never makes her feel uncomfortable, and cares about her well-being. Hyun-woo would be willing to let Hae-in go if it would make her happy, while Eun-seong would gladly make her miserable if it meant being with her. These two characters my friends, are love and selfishness defined.
📍Papa Baek and Papa Hong becoming drinking buddies will never not be cute.
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cmtcahrule · 1 year
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No Words. Part 2.
For those who can't or won't watch.
26. After our wedding I had purchased all of these lanterns. I had this storage unit of all of these lanterns because they really went with the vibe. I had him and his friends drive them in a U-Haul to Texas which was really helpful until they got stopped at the border with weed and went to jail. So they helped when they could.
27. So when things really blew up for him, which I knew took some years, and you were in the spotlight at red carpets, and you were at big movie premiers, and more eyes were on you, how did that feel? Like you had the taste of fame from the hosting, but did you like being in that spotlight of Hollywood? It felt really weird. Like I should be asking questions. I felt like I still wanted to be the person asking questions. There’s always a fine line. You want to be a supportive wife. But you don’t want to lose your identity. Your husband’s career is going one direction but I have always found it tricky to be a supportive wife and maintain everything else that I want. How can I maintain my young, bitch self and be who I am?
28. I wondered how you felt when he was doing really well and you had to come along for the ride? Everything goes back to relationships. We were best friends. We went everywhere together. We didn’t have kids for 5 years. We were together on every set and every experience. I have so many of my friends from his movie sets like Social Network.
29. Where were you when your marriage was ending? Were you ready? I don’t think anyone is ready. I am such a family person. My family is everything. I would literally do anything to take any pain away from my kid. There is literally nothing I would not do.
30. I am a very Christmas card, basic bitch girl who believes family is more important than life or work. I would honestly do anything to keep my family together.
31. During COVID ahead of the divorce announcement: He was having struggles with his dad. He said mentally I am not OK. Like for me, if anyone said I am not OK, you don’t argue with that.
32. Long story short, he left. I saw some text messages that were not supposed to be sent to me.
33. You know what, we have worked so hard and come so far, you just don’t leave your family during a global pandemic. Especially with everything that we have been through.
34.Yes, family is important, but some people are OK with infidelity, but some people can move on, some people can turn a blind eye, but I fucking deserve the world and I am not the girl.
35. I think people make mistakes but I was never going to stay in a relationship where I was disrespected.
36. I remember screaming and crying and not understanding how and why that this could even be happening after we had so many plans. We wanted more kids. We wanted to be in this neighborhood.
37. It was the most horrible time of my life. I am strong. Yes, you are strong as fuck. From the sidelines, watching you…the way you handled it should be written about.
38. Did he try to fight for the marriage when you wanted to end it? He was not in a great place at the time. I won’t speak on his behalf in terms of treatment but all I wanted for him was for him to get help.
39. I drove him to the airport.
40. A good place to heal is where there is no paparazzi or tabloids. I honestly think that one more year might be our “safe zone” here. It is not like we are hiding but I just want to protect them until they can understand that we are both in really healthy places now.
41. I told my daughter I will buy half of your car if you wait until you are 16 to have a phone.
42. I don’t want to overstep but this came out in the media that Armie is paying $1,500 per month in child support and for some reason that became public. I have built a really successful company and I have 3 shows right now in production. I am so grateful for the success of my company and my team. I can sit here and literally spend however many dollars on another year of arguing back and forth with him about how much money and it is such a waste. I will provide for our kids. They are with me all the time.
43. We were in LA and we were staying at my friend’s house and together putting the kids to sleep and reading a book together. That is what kids want and that is what makes them happy. If that is the one thing I can give them I will. There is nothing I won’t do for them. They didn’t ask for any of this.
44. Are you still dating your hot boyfriend? Yes. He is amazing. He is from Lithuania. Born and raised in a small village. He is a physical therapist. I am in love and I love him.
45. So if you move to LA is he going to come? I don’t know. Everyone says the city will ruin him. He is very traditional. He is only 26.
46. The kids love him so much. He is so present and great with them. He is never on his phone.
47. Our family of four, including Armie, is really important to them. That is their identity now.
48. Regarding work: I am excited for the one on Discovery. It is basically a Dateline but with modern terms. Toxic relationships. I am manifesting 300 seasons of it.
49. We have also done a show on Hulu about opening the location here in Cayman which I am hosting and producing. A couple of other ones that just sold.
50. In the end, everything comes down to trauma. Maybe you are filling a void you did not have when you were younger. We are all products of our upbringing. And that really manifests itself in romantic relationships.
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screampied · 1 month
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i literally hate it when people have usernames like '[character]'s real wife/husband' and it's like, no i am. like we literally got married months before you found out about them. fym? like i hate it when bitches lie. stay away from my baby /hj also, i read somewhere that you were a shifter? that's really cool, what was your first dr? even if u didn't shift there, mine was aot. it was first for armin then for my man eren. also also, kendrick lamar reference or the sixth sense reference? also also also, im sorry for flooding ur inbox, you're just really cool. like the cool older sister. i'll try to shut up after this, swear. ty, have a good day/night <33
-🎀 anon
LMAO. me bc i wanted to change my username with toji or nanami in it but im just not creative 💔 vegamin omg wait bye it’s taken i’m fucking sick
yessss i’m a shifter 😽✨. my first dr was also attack on titan !! then jjba. aot was definitely … something !!! eren literally killed me then i woke up. can’t have SHIT. i haven’t shifted in a bit tho bc most of my dreams have been straight darkness heh, pain.
YESS. i think it fits hu tao so well bc she’s a funeral director <3 UR FINEE NO WORRIES flood all you want 💓. how’s your day been bow bae? i hope it’s been gooood xx. AW ‘M LIKE A OLDER SISTER :( that’s so sweet, hugs 🫂. tyty, u too !!!
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doxypsychlean · 2 years
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hello! I absolutely LOVED "The Rogue Prince" fic and your works are so fascinating in general like i'm in love. If you accept reqs, what do you think about Deamon seeing his wife crying for the first time? Like yes it's an arranged marriage but they're developing the feelings and the reader is insecure about not being a sweet little wife. She's opposite to that ideal (mb she's tall/on the bigger side/not weak and absolutely can speak for herself not being in need to be always protected (mentally at least) and maybe she's the opposite of- hm, someone) and is so sure Deamon needs someone perfect, someone who's just not her. I don't really know if I want an honest reaction or just to be comforted so you can choose. (but happy ending is highly appreciated) It's ok if you don't feel like it! Stay hydrated! Thank u in advance!
Sapphire Tears
Daemon Targaryen x Tarth!Reader
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Warnings: blood
Thou shan't repost/copy/ translate any of my work or I'll sneak into your home late at night and bite your nose off!
English isn't my first language. I don't proofread. I slap commas wherever I feel they're needed.
A/N: The way Anon described the reader reminded me sm of my beloved Brienne, I just had to write the readers as a Tarth.
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"If only the Prince would show the same devotion to his lady wife as he does his work, Your Grace." Otto Hightower said, eyes trained on the ring on his right hand.
Then the Hand of the King looked up, directly at the Rogue Prince.
"You've not been seen in the Sapphire Isle or at Evenfall Hall for quite some time." The man said, brows knitted together.
"I think my blue bitch is happier for my absence." Daemon responded with a slight smile.
His brother, King Viserys, turned to look from Lord Hightower to Daemon, one eyebrow raiser and his forehead wrinkled.
"Lady Tarth is your wife, a good and honorable warrior and the Evenstar of Tarth"
"In Tarth, men are said to fuck sea lions instead of women." The Rogue Prince spat out, looking away from Otto. Viserys dropped his head in defeat, letting a sigh escape him at his brother's words. Daemon looked back at Otto, a disgusted expression on his face. "I can assure you, the sea lions are prettier."
"Dear me" The Master of Coin, Lord Lyman Beesbury, whispered in shock. Daemon didn't hear it. He had gone too far, he knew it.
His blue bitch, as he'd come to call her, was anything but. She was by no means an ugly creature. If he had to be honest, his lady wife was easy on the eyes. But she was strong, stronger than any woman Daemon had ever seen. The woman was a walking mountain, towering over almost everyone around her. She had no care for appearance or anything ladylike. No one, absolutely no one, had seen the Evenstar of Tarth in a dress before. She'd never shown interest in embroidery, dancing or singing, or learning how to play an instrument. Her calloused hands weren't used to the fine,delicate needles or the thin strings of a harp.
What she knew was the feeling of a sword in her hand. The first time they'd met, the lady was in the training grounds of Evenfall Hall. Mercilessly swinging at her squire as she was trying to teach the boy how to fight.
That's what angered Daemon. He was sent off to marry a knight. A woman knight. One that was far better than him. She was fast, she was strong and fought like a true warrior. He hated her for it. He hated how much he envied her.
A savage. A brute with long, luscious hair and eyes as blue as sapphires and as deep as the Narrow Sea. Freckled porcelain skin, a small scar here and there. Slender fingers, but strong grip. Sharp tongue and even sharper mind. Strength that rivaled the one of the storms that rocked Shipbreaker Bay.
She was loud, she was stubborn, she never bowed down to anyone, she wasn't scared to get in someone's face and then knock them to the dirt. She had her own way of going through life. One that didn't include him.
She liked being alone. And even if she didn't, she'd got used to it. While her late father was still alive and carried the title of Evenstar of Tarth himself, the old lord had tried to find a good match for her. But to no avail. All the noble men were either scared, jealous of her or didn't see it fit for their wife to be so...unladylike. The blonde also made sure to give them every reason to decline the offer.
She didn't need a husband. She didn't want one.
Then that letter from the King arrived. He had to get Daemon as far away from the capital. Tarth was one of his best options. Lord Tarth put his foot down, agreeing to the match despite his daughter's protests.
"You made a vow to the Seven to honor your wife in marriage." Otto's harsh voice pulled Daemon back to reality.
"Well, I'd gladly give Lady Tarth to you, Lord Hightower, if you're in want of a woman to warm your bed." Daemon said, head shaking lightly. "Your own lady wife passed recently."
Lord Hightower rose to his feet, the chair he'd been sitting on dragging on the floor as it got pushed back. He stared down at Daemon, daring him to continue.
"Did she not?" The Prince asked, taunting the Lord Hand some more. His fingers ran over the marble egg that was in front of him.
"Otto." Viserys cut through the growing tension.
Lord Hightower didn't respond. He swayed a bit, putting the weight of his body from one leg to the other. His eyes never leaving Daemon.
"Perhaps you aren't ready to move on just yet." Daemon mimicked Otto's movement, head tilting to the side slightly.
"You know how my brother makes sport of provoking you." Viserys said, trying to bring his Hand back to his senses. "Must you indulge him?"
"My apologies, Your Grace." Otto sat back down, eyes staring at Daemon and through him. His voice barely above a whisper.
It hurt. Daemon knew it. For all that sleazy old man was, Otto truly and undoubtedly loved his late wife. The Prince offered an innocent smile, teeth digging into his lower lip so he wouldn't laugh out.
"This council has, at great expense, bettered the City Watch to your exacting standards." Daemon turned to look at his King, fingers drumming against the polished wood of the table. "Enforce my laws, but understand, any further performances like last night's will be answered."
The two brothers smiled at eachother. Daemon looked down at the table and back up, nodding his head.
"Understood, Your Grace."
The Rogue Prince averted his eyes, then got up. He picked his sword up and made his way towards the exit, the gold cloak on his shoulder trailing behind him as he walked.
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"Prince Daemon!" The man that had been said to welcome him said. "We did not expect to see you. The Lady..."
The silver haired prince walked past him, hands rubbing together. He could hear Caraxes let out a roar as the dragon pushed off the ground and started flying in circles over Evenfall Hall.
"Where is my wife?" Daemon stopped suddenly, the man almost slamming in his back.
"I'm afraid Lady Tarth isn't here, my Prince..." The man whispered as he took a step back. "She's..."
Daemon turned around slowly, a smirk on his face. He closed the distance between him and the man, hands wrapping around his collar and lifting him up.
"And you couldn't be bothered to tell me before I got off?"
"I...I tried." The man stuttered. "She's..."
Daemon put him back down, one hand reached to dust off the man's shoulder.
"I know exactly where she is." The Prince let out a low laugh, the sound coming from deep inside his chest.
Daemon shoved the man away, walking back to where Caraxes had landed. The beast saw him immediately, then dropped back down. The ground underneath Daemon's feet shook at the impact.
"Ready for a little hunt?"
A growl, accompanied by a whistling, clicking sound came from the dragon, as if it was laughing at its rider's words. Daemon climbed on the dragon's back and once seated, pat the side of its wide neck.
Caraxes pushed its large body off the ground once more, wings spreading out.
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"Keep moving, Edwyn." The woman huffed as she climbed up the steep hill. "We're almost there."
The boy let out a huff, feet slipping on the wet ground.
"My lady, I still think we should have taken the Blue Road." He let out a yelp as her hand wrapped around his collar before the boy could tumble all the way down to the bottom. He let out a relieved laugh. "Maybe on horseback?"
"The Blue would've let us away from our destination, Ed." She pulled him forward so he could walk in front of her. "And watch where you're going. I have no use of a squire with snapped neck."
The two chuckled as they kept pushing up.
"I still don't understand why we had to go all the way here..." Edwyn trailed off.
"The farther away from my hall, the better." She admitted as her hand reached out for him again. "Gods be good, Edwyn, watch it!"
"Apologies, my lady." The boy laughed again. "But I don't understand... 'Tis your halls we are talking about."
"And?"
"I'm just saying, my lady, you shouldn't be hiding away." He turned to look at her. "It does no good."
She pulled him back before he could fall again. Then turned the boy around. Edwyn let out a gasp as he saw what laid before him.
The sound of water pounding down on stone drained any thought from his head. He looked up at the top off the waterfall, then his eyes went back down with the water. Despite it beating down on the giant rocks, the pool it was pouring in, was as calm as a lamb. The crown of green leaves that surrounded this peaceful haven, had left just enough space for the sunlight to pass through and bounce off of the light blue water.
She walked past him, coming to a stop right before the pool. The woman sat down, back resting against one of the larger rocks next to the waters. Edwyn shook himself out of the trance as he walked towards her. He winked, then with a big jump, got on top of the same rock. He sat down, eyes going back to stare at where the waterfall met with the pool.
"I hate the way they look at me..." Her voice tore through the silence. "As if there's something wrong with me."
"My lady..." The squire tried to stop her.
"No, Ed." She raised one hand, finger pointing up at the sky. "Don't. You can see it just as well as I can."
The trees around them shook slightly, leaves rustling as a large red dragon landed on top of the waterfall. Neither of them heard the load thud, the sound of the water completely draining out any other. Nor did they sense its rider's presence behind them, head of silver-white hair coming to stand between the trees, hiding in the shadows.
"You know, I've tried to be like them. Back when I was but a girl." The woman said as she reached down and took one of small, flat rocks in her hand. She tossed it at the water, the stone jumping once, twice, three times before sinking to the bottom of the pool. "I tried to put down the sword. Shove myself in a dress. Spend time with those insufferable cows."
Both her and her squire laughed. Daemon let out a snort, quiet enough for them to not hear.
"But I can't. That's not me." The blonde looked up the boy. "So I accepted it. I'll always be a fighter, and one day- the Lady of Tarth. Take over once my father was gone from the world. Rule."
She took another stone and tossed it into the water.
"I knew I had to take the hand I've been dealt. I quite enjoy it, actually. Ruling. I kept getting better. At it, at fighting. Even became a knight."
"Twas not enough?" Her squire asked.
"No, Ed. It wasn't." She shook her head with a bitter laugh. "Oh, how I wish it was..."
It went awfully quiet. The woman didn't know if she should say it. Of course, it'd be only her loyal squire and friend, Edwyn Tudbury, that would hear the words.
"I tried to ignore them." Her voice had become unsteady. "It's always behind my back, those cowards wouldn't dare say any of it to my face. But I'm not deaf, Ed. Nor am I blind."
Daemon watched as the boy jumped off the rock, then sat down next to his wife.
"The Beast of Tarth, the Sapphire Beauty..." Tears rolled down her face. "Blue bitch."
"My lady, I'm sure the Prince..." The squire said as he wrapped a hand around her shoulder.
"Oh please, you know it just as well as I do." Her head dropped down, pools of gold hair hiding her face from him. And from Daemon. "He didn't want me. I didn't want him either."
"Then why?"
"My father. He came to me one day, said he'd found a good match. The best match I could ever hope for." The woman straightened up. Edwyn's hand dropped from her shoulders as she did. "He also said if I don't accept, he would strip me off my titles, make me renounce my claim and exile me."
The boy let out a shocked gasp. He wrapped his hand around the woman once more.
"Oh, friend...I'm so,so sorry."
"It's fine, Ed." She whispered. "I'm fine."
She wasn't. Daemon could see it. On her face. In the way her hand rose to her chest and clutched at the pastel blue tunic, right over her heart.
"You don't deserve this. I'm really sorry."
"If you were to ask them..." She pointed towards right where Daemon was standing. Unfortunately for him, Edwyn followed her hand. His eyes widened at the sight of the Rogue Prince, hiding behind a tree. Daemon quickly put the pointer finger of his right hand against his lips, silent plead for the boy to keep quiet. "That's exactly what I deserve. It's even too much."
She got up, hands stretching out. The woman looked up at waterfall. There- two big yellow eyes. Red scales. Sharp teeth. She let out a chuckle.
"Just think about it, Ed. The poor, handsome Prince Daemon of House Targaryen, doomed to spend to rest of his life with..." She pointed towards herself. "...a fucking monster. This giant, savage brute."
The blonde winked at the boy in front of her, knowing look in her puffy,red eyes. Edwyn had spent enough time around her to know what that meant. He decided to play along.
"At least he's got the wits to stay away and not be tortured by your monstrosity." The squire said as he got on his feet and then back on top of the rock.
Daemon felt his whole body twitch at the boy's words. He almost lunged forward, but the hand he'd wrapped around the tree stopped him. The Rogue Prince was ready to tear his throat open.
"If only he had the wits to not spy on me, Ed..." They both turned to stare at the silver haired man. "Have you anything to say for yourself, husband?"
Daemon felt the tips of his ears starting to burn, his face reddening.
"Come now. Don't just stand there."
The flap of giant wings interrupted them. Daemon rolled his eyes as he walked out of the shadows. His only escape plan had just flown off to wherever its heart wanted. The Prince had no other choice, but to face her.
"I was looking for you." He said as he leaned against the rock. "You weren't at Evenfall Hall."
"Why are you here?" The woman hissed out as she walked towards him. Daemon pushed off the rock, their noses almost touching as he did. "It's not enough that you make a fool out of me, desert me and call me names in front of anyone, hm? You've come to rattle the beast's cage yourself?"
"My lady!" Edwyn tried to pull her away, but she shoved him away.
"No." The blonde turned to look at the squire, her long hair smacking Daemon in the face. The Prince smiled. "He's on my land without making his intentions clear."
"Wouldn't it be my land too?" Daemon's voice reached her ears. "I am your husband, like it or not."
She smiled down at Edwyn, foot tapping on the ground.
"My lady, please..." Edwyn tried once more.
But it was too late. She swung at Daemon, fist colliding with his nose. The Prince stumbled back, almost losing his footing.
"This is the last time I ask." She shook her hand up and down as the other one reached for Daemon's chestplate. She wrapped her fingers around the neckline, then pulled Daemon up and towards her. "Why are you here?"
As Daemon wiped at the blood coming from his nose, his eyes trailed to her red,blotchy cheeks. A tear was rolling down each one of them.
"Care to join me for a ride?" Daemon nodded up at the sky. "After we escort your squire back home, that is."
The woman huffed before letting go of Daemon. A smile crept up her face. The Rogue Prince returned it with one of his.
"Fine. Go get your winged lizard back."
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robo-writing · 8 months
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reread that AU MIL anabella anon and honestly i think if she was being extra horrible to clive’s spouse one day and u just snapped back at her bc everyone has a limit (most likely the final straw of her commenting on how ofc clive would attract a second mongrel into the house after torgal) i think it would be prime entertainment for everyone but her (byron is trying not to burst out laughing at her shocked expression) and clive would try to rescue it with faux politeness and excuse the two of u but then fuck u till sunrise bc ur not holding back on ur thoughts of her
Oh when you blow up on her it’s anger in its most pure form, biblical even. Had you been a dominant your awakening would’ve happened at that exact moment when she refers to your husband as a mongrel. As impressed Clive is of your defiance he stops you from any further violence, barely stopping you from jumping over the couch and throttling her (even as much as he’d enjoy to see the sight, she’s still his mother.)
He’s forced to drag away the hissing cat that has replaced his wife, claws bared in the form of biting words and a colorful vocabulary he’s certain to ask you about tomorrow. But for tonight, he knows more than a few ways to tame your anger.
You’ve been pacing in your shared bedroom the moment Clive brought you away from that—that evil woman you’ve had the misfortune to call your mother in law. God, just thinking about her makes you walk faster.
“A mongrel, a fucking mongrel?” You nearly scream. “If there’s any flea ridden dogs in this castle it’s that spoiled old bitch—“
Perhaps it’s in bad faith to laugh, especially when his own mother is the subject, but the sight of you ranting out loud is quite amusing.
“—I mean seriously, her own son is in the room! I knew she hated me the moment we met but you’re her own flesh and blood! How could a mother look her son in the eyes and call him a mongrel?”
You look back to your husband lounging on the bed for confirmation, to which he only shrugs.
“Seriously Clive? Please don’t tell me she’s been like this your whole life.”
“The truth is often what we don’t wish to hear,” he says, gesturing you closer. The moment you do so you’re pulled into his lap, and all your worries seem to slip away from your mind.
You sit like that for a while, the sound of his breathing a gentle comfort, a heavy hand at your back resting against the curve of it.
“You know, that was a very brave thing you did,” he whispers. “Standing up to my mother, that is.”
You huff in response, now suddenly aware of how rude your outburst was. “Someone had to, I suppose. I doubt I’ll ever get her approval now.”
A sympathetic pat to your back. “To be fair, my mother is a very stubborn woman. There is little to change her mind once she’s made a decision.”
You know he’s right, but you’re still saddened by the realization. No matter what you did, Anabella would never have approved of your love, even if you spent the rest of your days bending over backwards.
Clive senses your emotions and kisses you softly, quelling any doubts that form in your head.
“Darling, look at me,” he coos, turning your eyes towards his. “I do not care what she thinks of us, I would stay with you with or without her consent—I suppose that’s what mongrels do.”
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ewyaschild · 2 years
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🤍 THE SISTER SCANDAL 🤍
a/n: i have nothing to say. read it or don't. miss out. and bitch do you think this is beta read? LMAOAOAOAOA
warnings: suggestive 😘 naughty jeffry 😩 and out of character everyone
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a shadow appeared overhead as a private jet flew over the reef. the arrival horn bellowed throughout the town and many gathered to see this human-like technology.
as the jet landed, the chief of the metkayina, tonowari, approached the jet with caution.
"a demon ship!" "they've came for us!" scared civilians shouted. "my people. don't be afraid; this ship does not pose any threat. fall back." tonowari calmly stated.
"WHAT'S UP YALL!" a zesty voice shouted from the demon ship. "guys we just landed in pandora and the reef people have me GAGGED. look at their muscles! WIG!!!!" a short (compared to their 10 foot asses) blonde tatted man strutted on an invisible runway with a man in black holding a camera, filming him. "what business do you have placing that chunk of metal on my land!" the tsahik, ronal hissed.
"OOP! don't be upset mama, i'm just here to document my vacation on ur beautiful island purrr." the twink looked her up and down, with a cheeky smile. "and YOU big daddy 😘 must be the chief! will you let me stay? i've flown all the way here and i am completely jet lagged." blondie bitch rubbed tonowari's muscular arms and blinked up at the chief with puppy dog eyes.
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2 Months Later
getting from pandora to earth was pretty rocky so jeffery decided to stay and try to live amongst the reef people. he had to retire his lace frontal since the salt water kept washing it away, but tonowari still thought he was beautiful, even bald. he'd never admit that to ronal though.
jeffery and tonowari get along well, the whole clan learned to love jeffery although he was a demon. he became admirable, sitting in the middle of a circle of children telling them all they need to know about birkins and mikaylas false eyelash scandal.
one night tonowari sneaks out his hammock and down the shoreline, where he finds jeffery. at their usual spot. "hey baby boy." the na'vi smirks. "hi big daddy". jeffery responds while tonowari lays down next to him. "we need to talk." "oh no. we do? i'm shook. we've been healthy!" tonowari sighs at his response. "baby it's not that. i don't know if i can keep sneaking out of my hammock to come meet you. my kids are getting suspicious."
"fuck them kids baby breed me instead 😩" jeffery moans. "jeffy im serious. it's hurting me" jeffery lays his head on tonowaris man tits and strokes his abs lovingly. "i know. break the news to your wife, tell her you want to be with me. or don't, i'm open to threesomes." "i'll suggest it. thank you my little scooby do DOOP."
they fall asleep at the shoreline, snoring a beautiful song.
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a/n 2: i couldn't fucking do that to myself anymore i had to end it there. for context, i had a dream tonowari and jeffery star bands together and kidnapped me. that sparked this monstrosity! if u read this all the way thru ur amazing.
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Longass Crop Circles Notes (for Lately, I've Been Thinking and I Don't Think I've Changed Chapter One
Finally delivered to @spicymiilk our king. My apologies that these longass notes are not as detailed as last time. I shall endeavor to get more detailed as I read more of the fic. I will post my rage thoughts on chapter eight of for the nights and days of life by @mochalottie tomorrow though, and that shit will be novel length. Anyways:
Lately, I've Been Thinking:
-Me when Andrei says Spider will have a bad time: but does he ever have a good time for you??
-NORM CONTENT. *airhorn blares*
-I gotta love the tragic Shameless vibes you bring into my Spider fics, man. 
-Retweet, Spider, we all hate men. We are all scared of men. 
-Rip Paz, the fandom tries to tell me you weren’t a bitch but I don’t buy it. You totally were. Justice for Trudy, who was way cooler.
-Wait, did Spider do drugs too? The needles are around his bed? Or did he steal his moms bed?
-Lol, Paz is in and out, there is SO MUCH Shameless in this story. You can't hide from me, bastard.
-YESS, THE FAST FOOD AU. 
-Also, Andrei, what is it about beating the natural joy and zest for life out of Spider that gets u off?
-Neteyam will lOVE fixing this guy tho. Spider is his wet dream at this point. 
-I actually know a kid in my grade who was placed with one of my family friends when he was seventeen, he is fantastic. He’s the oldest of like, seven kids and the littlest ones go to the elementary school I work at now. My mom works there too and she always says you can tell when this kid is home because the little ones are showered and on time, and he takes them to get haircuts and stuff. He used to walk 45 minutes to work every day. He’s a great guy but he doesn’t stay. He doesn’t let them drag him down. :/
-Spider, on the brink of death, unloved and abused and neglected, dirty and with one single tangle of hair: hi
Neteyam: that is my soulmate. 
I Don't Think I've Changed Chapter One:
-WHATS YOUR DAMAGE THE FIC? That’s the one line I quote more from any other type of media. Every day I go “WHAT IS YOUR CHILDHOOD TRAUMA??” 
-N E T E Y A M VS SELF ESTEEM. MAN MANAGES TO HATE HIMSELF EVEN IN THE FACE OF SPIDER. 
-Also the fear I felt when I saw Miles and Norm are best friends actually, I’m comforting myself like “no no, he meant Spider it’s okay.”
-The hilarity of getting rid of Lo’ak and Kiri who are the canonically closest to Spider and leaving us with Tuk and Neteyam and Jeytiri. That excited me lITERALLY SO MUCH. The fast food au did start with only Tuk and Neteyam, and that’s juicy. We are forced to develop and explore relationships that are underdeveloped in canon and are harder to justify as instant sparks. You took away his natural in canon support systems so he has to learn to develop even faster with the other Sully's and that is a banger idea.
-W H E E L C H A I R J A K E. God I love wheelchair Jake aus, I love making them positive because I don’t like the way the first movie just fixed his disability. Give me Jake Sully being a positive disabled male father figure in his kids lives, just as present and happy and in love with his wife while paralyzed then he would be with mobility. What creative stuff has changed in their lives to accomidate? I need to know.
-Delighted by this Neytiri pov, my god. I feel like less people than I need in my life just let Neytiri have no bad blood at all with Spider in modern aus. She would be all over a neglected child.
-GET THE STICKY TOYS, thats so cute. And useful, I need him to get the magnets some kids got stuck to the ceiling in the gym at my work.
-Tuk is already bullying Neteyam about liking Spider and he isn’t even there yet. I’m lOVING the little bits of the fast food au I spot. She is going to be a menace. And clearly Neteyam is a lovesick clown.
-He is indeed about to get the shit loved out of him, and that is what every Spider Sully writer says before writing their fic. 
-WHAT DID THE MCCOSKERS DO SPIDER, NORM SHOULD KNOW, THEN HE WON’T PLACE OTHER KIDS WITH THEM BUDDY.
-Love the descriptions of how Spider feels when Norm’s body relaxes, just noting the way he backs off. So specific and accurate to any abused child. That tension and hypersensitivity to anyone's emotions, even people you implicitly trust, like never goes away.
-Norm thinking someone didn’t let Spider pee in the bathroom is so tragic and funny I feel bad for laughing. 
-Spider: heart palpitations upon seeing Neteyam
Spider: NORM YOU DIDN’T TELL ME YOU WERE WINGMANNING ME?
I am picturing Norm and Tuk in the back of a Burger King setting up an elaborate plan while Neteyam sighs and watches Spider from a booth while writing Neteyam Socorro on all of his notebooks.
-i am cACKLING. You’ve never seen rizz as strong or as intense as “MILES??” and “WHOS THAT? WHAT’S SCHOOL, I DON’T KNWO WHAT THAT IS?” Their dumb clown asses belong together.
-In all seriousness though, I can't imagine how humiliating it would feel to Spider to know some random acquaintance at school was now privy to all your personal problems and business.
-I want to know how often Neteyam frequents the local Burger King. He's probably so embarrassed at how ready he was to big brother this kid. He's gonna be like "looking hot today, uh, I mean, did you need help with your homework champ???"
-This is now like To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before, Neteyam can call Kiri and Lo’ak on the phone and gossip about boy problems
-JAKE INTRODUCING HIMSELF AS A MILITARY MAN TO EVERY CHILD THAT GETS BROUGHT INTO THEIR HOUSE, NO ONE VETOED THAT SHIT?? Kiri hasn't been like "sTOP TELLING EVERYONE YOU LOVE THE MILITARY, YOU ARE EMBARASSING US."
-Also wow does Norm not know Spider’s dad was former military and he way not vibe with that at all?
-The way that Neteyam is still stalking Spider at McDonalds Or Burger King we can’t be sure. The mention of both places has sent me to space because it makes it seem like Spider used to work at McDonalds and then switched to Burger King and deeply obsessed stalker Neteyam Sully switched establishments to frequent.
-Spider’s fear of Tuk is hilarious and deeply sad, that is your bestie. 
-I LOVE love the idea of Kiri and Neteyam watching video essays. I love video essays, I wish my brothers did gOD. Also love a late night owl Neteyam head canon.
-Spider really is a wet rat. Have you ever actually seen a wet rat? The saying is so accurate. Kid was fed properly for the first time in years and then it killed him. Love kills Spider at first, as we have learned from all Spider Sully fics. He's like a dog eating chocolate, it's good, but at what cost.
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