#SPY ANON OUR BELOVED

[queerfortress2]

hello, it's the spy anon here again! <3

that was perfect! he's my babygirl through and through idc if he's like 48. there's like barely any scraps of spy content on here so if i could please request another spy x reader headcanons where reader is an artist and tends to stare, or "study", his face (masked or not)? like they love just observing his side profile and memorizing every detail, even just drawing him when they think he's not looking.

u guys r the best!! have an awesome day

IM BAAAACKKKK <3333 HELLO AGAIN!! i would love toooo!! (babygirl = 40+ yr old men anyway) — mod medic <3

ARTIST!READER X SPY

i think he has some appreciation for the arts

like i think he has collect and commission art!! so having a lover who draws him for free would be a dream come true.

i think he wouldnt connect the artist to staring at first, thinking you're generally enamored by him. like. you love me you love to stare at me i know what you are

maybe comments on it every now and then to catch you off guard, its very funny to see your reaction. but to catch him without the mask on? yeah GOOD LUCK.

even the woman he had a CHILD with practically only saw him with a mask

he is rarely seen without it, so at the most i think you would have to use your imagination (and if ever finding out about scout, maybe use him for reference as well)

while sleeping one night, he probably managed to find your sketchbook lying around (or hidden, he'd still find it)

if you’re quick enough you could catch him but odds are he puts it back once he hears you waking up.

WILL bring it up in the morning and try to describe how he looks without the mask

(it looks nothing like him he just wants to look like that)

you are drawing spy propaganda how does it FEEL

overall you now have a number 1 model and you can’t get rid of him. he is.. ruder than most when asking you to draw him but he means well!! he just wants to be your muse,,

I HOPE THIS IS OKAY MY SPY-LOVING ANON!!

[tcfactory]

thinking about a dumb thing where mobei overhears sqh telling a story to the disciples and gets rlly invested but doesnt want to admit he's been following him around his peak so he listens from the shadows. It's a beautiful tale of a powerful cultivator king who seeks demonic cultivation in order to save his family and people. There's a grand battle where he is the sole solider against an army of thousands, everyone is on the edge of their seats as SQH describes that during the battle, (1)

(2) spies have infiltrated the castle to take his son! the wife fights valiantly, but shes mortal, and by the time the king hears her call she is already slipping from the tallest tower. She falls before her beloved husband arrives, and he flies after her. It's a drawn out moment, where SQH describes the wind pressing past them both, the weight of her body dragging her down. what mbj does not anticipate is "the agonising silence that followed the tragic thud of her body, too fast to catch" (3) cue mbj leaping out of the shadows without thinking because WHAT!!!!! WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE D I E D, WHAT! the disciples are screaming. the hall masters are rushing in the room in a panic. sqh has no fucking idea what to say other than "ITS A TRAGEDY FOR A REASON!!"

Anon, I love this idea so much.

SQQ would be crowing about how he absolutely told zhangmen-shixiong that SQH was a spy! (This applies to both versions of SQQ. SJ because he's upset that nobody believed him, SY because that's what you get when you let your demon sneak onto the peak Airplane!!)

SQH has to pull out all stops in his bullshitting to explain why he shouldn't be executed or kicked off the mountain and actually zhangmen-shixiong, having the future Northern Demon King as our mascot ally could have a lot of benefits for us...

In the end MBJ is allowed to visit for SQH Story Hours if he behaves, mostly because they can't exactly keep him out (they try. MBJ is too OP, nothing they do even so much as hinders him) and SQH is too important to be easily replaced.

So MBJ gets to sit among the disciples and listen to SQH tell his funky little stories. Then one day the disciples complain about how SQH always messes up the endings (why all the tragedies, Airplane? Clearly your audience is clamoring for a happy end!), so SQH suggests that if they don't like the stories then they should write their own.

Next morning there's a perfectly filled out request form on YQY's desk for an open attendance fiction writing workshop. YQY is very sure he has locked the door last evening, but also that handwriting is very familiar, wtf Shang-shidi. He always assumed SQH's head disciple was finishing up SQH's paperwork whenever he fell asleep at his desk and turns out he was half right. He has no idea what interest a bored demon could possibly have in requisition forms, but there are so many worse things he could be doing that YQY will just pretend that it's not happening, for the sake of his sanity. He will have Words with SQH about why his demon has free access to all of CQMS's paperwork, but in the meantime he gives his blessing for an interpeak writing workshop ft. one MBJ, because that feels like the path of least resistance. Also maybe because SQQ expressed interest in the idea when he heard about it and what SQQ wants, YQY will give him.

[thefisherqueen]

I just read Raffles' The Knees of the Gods in one go, and oh boy, I was not prepared for the ending. I didn't really like most of the story - it is rather a mess of imperialist, patriotic, war as an adventure narrative - but there were some intriguing aspects to it. Bunny goes to war, only to find the worst enemy within his own camp, and faces terrible bullying for not being able to fit his fellow soldier's standards of masculinity. Raffles sticking by him despite meeting those standards so well himself is quite touching. They have their adventure in unmasking a spy, their true identity is unveiled, yet they are allowed to remain...

And then that adventure all very unexpectely comes crashing down in the last part and we are faced with the harsh reality of any war: pain, lasting disability, death. And a crushing sense of futility. Is this a critique on the so called 'glory of war'? I'm not sure if it goes that far, despite Bunny's regret, as the company Raffles and Bunny fought with are still painted as heroic, and Raffles' remarks on having had the best of times fall odd. Yet war means the a devastating end to the relationship between our two beloved gay criminals.

So there we lay together on the veldt, under blinding sun and withering fire, and I suppose it is the veldt that I should describe, as it swims and flickers before wounded eyes. I shut mine to bring it back, but all that comes is the keen brown face of Raffles, still a shade paler than its wont; now bending to sight and fire; now peering to see results, brows raised, eyes widened; anon turning to me with the word to set my tight lips grinning. He was talking all the time, but for my sake, and I knew it. Can you wonder that I could not see an inch beyond him? He was the battle to me then; he is the whole war to me as I look back now.

They were together till the very last :( :(

[saintsenara]

hello! your opinions genuinely make me laugh so hard and often everytime i check your tag, so i have come bearing some more unhinged food for thought:

1) hagrid/sirius

2) harry/narcissa

3) harry/snape/narcissa

4) narcissa/snape/lily

really interested in your opinion on these, esp. snarlily, since i already know your instance on all three bilateral dynamics involved on their own! this ot3 came to me in a ferver dream and ever since i’ve been pondering hard on it, and what i��m thinking is maybe it could pop off as leeway for so much political drama and character development in a first war au, where a saner voldemort spares lily and harry and kidnaps them instead because he’s curious and wants to further investigate and/or keep the boy of the prophecy under his thumb. so, let’s say, since lily doesn’t die the fidelius doesn’t fall (going with the theory on how the fidelius charm works that says the charm only falls if the one to cast it dies and the idea of lily being the one to have cast the charm making peter the secret keeper) but james still dies and lily is widowed… so we have a hostage situation where everyone is stuck at the manor having the worst time ever, maybe a snily marriage of convenience is proposed by snape as a front to further protect her, who agrees for harry since he’s all she’s got left, and appease to the dark lord in a show of keeping her in check; all the while snarcissa already have an affair on the low while lucius is away doing war crimes business. i could see narcissa being lowkey so jealous that severus “got” the woman he told her he’s actually in love with even as their affair continues, lily finding out about said affair and having mixed feelings as she and severus are forced to reconnect for survival’s sake, and the forced cohabitation of both women as mothers with overprotective tendencies contrasting each other in their very polarizing mindsets and standings re: the dark lord’s approaching victory over the light all going a lot of interesting, plotty, intimate, possibly even betraying ways that could parallel narcissa’s quiet self-serving defiance in the second war—maybe if she somehow finds out more about severus’ duplicitous spy duties?

i’m a sucker for the prospect of ALL three black sisters finding themselves in romantic relationships to non-purebloods. the potential of dramatic irony in the most conformist black sister succumbing to the same ‘fault’ both of her sisters have fallen to and being forced to confront herself about the hypocrisy is so tasty to me… (also, “i mean, what’s better than lucius getting cheated on not once but twice?” was an insane argument that came to mind and it reminded me of our beloved ‘other women and of purer blood’, which is why i thought to bring the idea here)

what do you think are really the potential vibes in this mess? sorry for the extremely long ask + rant ;;

thank you very much for the ask, anon!

sirius black/rubeus hagrid

i back it enormously.

not least because it's really striking in canon that hagrid - and not, for example, lupin - ends up being the adult who best understands sirius as he actually was, who best understands what he meant to harry, and who therefore becomes the guardian of relics of sirius' life [buckbeak, the motorcycle] which we would ordinarily expect harry to be unwilling to let go to someone other than him.

it's also really striking that, no matter how much the fandom likes to focus on dumbledore's role in this rather than hagrid's, sirius is willing to relinquish control of harry to hagrid after james and lily die.

there is, then, a clear trust - and a clear honesty - between them. and since trust and honesty are intimacies in and of themselves... why shouldn't there be other intimacies going on in sigrid nation...

narcissa malfoy/harry potter

harry would - canonically - go there.

harry would also - canonically - definitely opt to pursue a gorgeous blonde milf specifically for the way it would ruin the life of her son.

narcissa would do it to punish lucius for using her shower gel.

narcissa malfoy/harry potter/severus snape

flopping for harry, since the other two are so transparently into each other.

they keep slapping his hands away whenever he tries to join in.

narcissa malfoy/lily potter/severus snape

i am genuinely intrigued by the kinky hostage ot3 scenario, but only as a crackfic, with these two separate pairings linked together by a snape who's in shambles.

narcissa's conformity is - as you say - something that i'm really obsessed with, and what i like is that the artifice in her self-presentation meshes really nicely with the artifice in snape's. in snily, in contrast, there's not so much artifice as delusion - snape is in love with a version of lily who doesn't actually exist outside of his own head; lily is best friends with a version of snape who doesn't actually exist outside of hers.

and so i really like the idea of snape have to constantly fluctuate between the two different people he is with each of the two women he finds himself entangled with - and having to switch between the various different versions of himself he presents to dumbledore, voldemort, et al. - and basically ending up having a complete breakdown.

lily is canonically stubborn, so she stays and drags snape back into something approaching a stable sense of self.

narcissa moves - praying mantis style - onto rodolphus.

[wardentabriis]

So, fun ask time...

Tell a story about one of your favourite moments in TTRPG's you've played! Whether it was because it was funny, or moving, or whatever.

(Pretend this is on anon so you don't know it's your beloved game master sending this ask.)

Hello not-my-beloved-GM! I will separate this into two categories:

Most Moving:

Definitely-not-you-running-it Curse of Strahd, which I will recount for the people who are also not my GM, when my poor little rogue-paladin Cassius, who had fallen in love with Strahd's boytoy Escher after dragging him around Barovia for adventures (even knowing he was probably a spy).

They were at the point where they knew they were in love, but couldn't do anything about it until Strahd was defeated, because Escher would always be his spawn and subject to his whims until that time. While they were staying at the winery again in preparation to take the fight to Strahd, they took a nice morning walk together, during which Escher asked Cassius to kill him so he wouldn't have to be forced to turn on him, and so he could make his own decision to be free. Fantastic moment. Crying all around. Promises to come back for him with the magic to bring him back before a stake to the heart.

Cut to the trial beneath Yester Hill (which I believe was from a supplementary module). Cassius is separated from the party by supernatural means, and finds himself walking through a long tunnel, when he hears a familiar voice. He can hear Escher behind him, but can't see him. They talk for a long time,, Cassius even reaching back to hold his hand, before Cassius realizes that, to get back to the task at hand, he has to let Escher go. So he turns around, and finds no one there, but sees the end of the tunnel ahead shortly after. One of the only moments I've legitimately cried in a game. (It's fine, Cassius earned his heart's desire from a goddess eventually, which was a diamond with the ability to perform one true resurrection. They're married and living in Baldur's Gate and have kids.)

Funniest:

I'm in a PF1e Rise of the Runelords game, and I play a very strong, loudmouthed, charismatic skald named Svana. We were infiltrating and clearing out a fortress that had been taken over by giants, on behalf of some allied mercenaries. On one of the last floors we were clearing, we discovered a kitchen/pantry, which contained barrels of pickled fish. Svana, being a northerner with a taste for pickled fish, decided to fit some in her bag of holding.

We realized shortly after that there were giants about to come down the hall, and we needed to catch them off guard, and possibly trap them, before getting into direct conflict with them. Options were slim. Svana, in a moment of tactical genius, reluctantly decided to grease the hallway with the oil and brine (and some fish) from the barrels, hoping to get the giants prone and vulnerable.

It worked. Too well. We got into a slip-and-slide battle in the halls and kitchen. The GM in this game uses a crit fumble/success generator. One of the giants fails his attack so badly that his swing moves him so many feet away from his target. The floor is covered in fish oil. He fails to get his footing. He skids across the floor and into a katana our ninja had dropped earlier. GM rolls for funsies to see if the katana misses him. Rolls a crit. The giant, with his full momentum, slides into the blade, impales himself, and dies. The pickled fish trap was a success in my books.

[delulu-with-wandanat]

Fics recs: 1-THE ROMANOFF CHRONICLES, an astounching groundbreaking, never seen before (literally) masterpiece, 100/10. It's mainly set in those 5years post snap, it explains the development that each character presented in endgame in a way the Russos wish they did, it represents the friendship between the avengers in a way marvel never allowed them be, it respects Natasha ( skill set, humanity, personality, affiliations,..) it's nat centric, it's only flaw: it's not complete but don't worry it has 60 medium to long chaps.

2-ON THE COVER - RED WHITE AND BLACK | New York Magazine | Dec. 30th, 2024, this is the most beautifully written farewell, tribute to Natasha Romanoff I have ever seen, it's written in a format that I think has never been used in fanfics, it's a soul touching poetic masterpiece

3- Ohio years, an exquisite bittersweet mini series of 1 shots that's written in a captivating style that keeps your attention, it showcases how the Russian murder family but mainly nat & Melina come to love & connect to each other.

4-FIREFLIES, it's written in such a bittersweet melancholic reminiscing way, it's just so beautiful. It's an 18 1 shots about nat encountering fireflies & being reminded of Ohio years &then others being reminded of nat by seeing them.

5- DISTURBING THE PEACE, an excellent 100/10 tear-jerker masterpiece, it's a very long 1 shot about what if post apocalyptic lonely nat , it also showcases her friendship with og avengers & nick.

6- I USED TO HAVE NOTHING, - WIDOW SISTERS AND MANY MARVELOUS MARVEL WOMEN - WE ARE MEANT FOR MORE THAN THIS, it's cute well written comfort, fluff, a bit angsty 3 different series of mainly 1 shots by 3 different authors about yelena and Natasha. They're my all time favorite comfort read.

7- I LOVE YOU, GOODBYE, it's a very very long 1 shot of AU of endgame in which Wanda survives & wandanat happens that hit me so hard I needed hours to process it & get out of it, my only quell with it is that it reset nat & Wanda's relationship with each other at postAOU where they would definitely be distant to each other.

8- IT'S FUN TO LOSE AND TO PRETEND, an absolute tear-jerker, a masterpiece, a beauty, a greatness, it's a 5 parts multichaps which takes place just after Westview, before Hawkeye where nat is given another chance ending up at Wanda's door, Wanda is given the healing marvel denied her with nat, Sam &bucky not being limited by the shackles of the screen & actually interacting with the events of their universe,Clint and yel meeting with their beloved. The ending was a bit unsatisfying to me but nonetheless as martin says this is CINEMA.

9- HOW NATASHA ROMANOFF MARRIED WANDA MAXIMOFF, it's a medium paced 38 chaps retelling of "how Nancy Jackson married Kate Wilson" but with wandanat with huge changes. It's sweet & adorable, the beginning was a bit rocky to me, there parts I would wince where I didn't like it but otherwise an absolute entertainment, I wanna kiss the head of it's author irl for giving me this absolute comfort for FREE. God or whatever higher power bless this person.

10-OUR LITTLE GROUP HAS ALWAYS BEEN (AND ALWAYS WILL UNTIL THE END), it's 9 part series of mini chaps, it's very creative concept,a wild imagination, it's the biggest au to ever au as its author puts it. To me it's the truest form of fanfic, the author took majority of the plot of MCU & toyed with it &come up with their world which has everything cute adorable wandanat, yelenat, the maximoffs, yel and Pietro, loving Russian spy parents, coulson's Lola, overall it's cuteness overload. God bless this author too.

If you ever decide to read them pls leave them a comment & let me know how you feel about them, also do you have more nat centric fanfics or just good fanfics about nat and anybody else.

oh my FUCKING GODDD THANK U ANON!!!

im def gonna read all ur recs! So far i had this one fanfic i rlly like but i forgot the title. I��ll let u know when i rememberr

[yandere-daze]

❄️OH MY GOSH IF THEY CONTROL TOUR MISSIONS….damn whoever gave me repidigit missions are not forgiven. (it’s probably trickstar. rebellion stars end on a repidigit.)

OH and if they can somehow manipulate our phones settings to hear our voice while we play the game oh man i’m starting to feel sorry for them hdjsjksjs

if the player is the type of person who says the most random things during the game (like me) the characters would hear things like “omg leoooooo i love you so much i hope you fall on your face you’re so cute <33” THEY’D GET SO CONFUSED and whenever the player didn’t get the five star they want the characters would have to hear things like “I HATE YOU NATSUME WHY COULDN’T YOU HAVE BEEN RITSU”

or maybe some random humming (or screaming) of the song’s lyrics maybe occasional singing normally. i think leo especially would be really happy about it since he wrote all of knights’ songs and his beloved player is singing them oh my god he’s getting so much inspiration

or maybe if you remember their voice lines from the being on your homescreen or party for so long you started saying their lines with them! some of them would probably get so happy they cry.

I IMAGINE TSUKASA BEING HIGHKEY SAD WHEN WE MOCK HIS “ENSEMBLE STRAWS” IM SORRY TSUKASA

yes i do all of the above

sdnakjndl if you think the repidigit missions in en are bad then be happy that you´ve never had to play the jp tour events before. Honestly while playing the en version of the first tour event I was actually pleasantly surprised because I thought that it was way more comfortable with it´s goals than the jp version. What I did with those missions was to look how many notes the song has beforehand and then play normally until I hit a high combo with a repidigit ( I didn´t even know this was a word before plaything the tour event djnsldan) and then drop the combo. Then I just continued playing normally until the end of the song and it would work because the game only counts the highest combo you achieved while playing

In jp we instead had to have the score end with a certain number at the end of the life. Thise where the ones I usually really struggled with. What you would do there is play on easy and play normally through almost the entire song until there´s like only 10 notes left. Then you pray that the score ends in the desired number in those last few notes. If it does you stop playing immediately and hope you´ll still pass the live. It was really annoying and sometimes I would have to try this with every single songs in the day because it just wouldn´t work out. So glad they replaced those missions in the en version!

gn reader

tw yandere, spying through the mic

Honestly, no matter how weird or stranger whatever you say ends up being, they wouldn´t really mind. They tried so hard to hack into your microphone so just being able to hear your voice after all this time is already a blessing! Even better if you´re saying their name! It sounds so wonderful, coming from you!

They will probably be a bit confused if you make such random statements but most of them are just zoning in on the fact that you said you love them <3

And then there´s people like Mika who are like “ they called me cute and want me to fall on my face? What if I fall down on purpose just for them? Are they going to call me cute again???” and he just does whatever you ask of him in an effort to please you

And yes, the gacha pain is real, I feel you, anon! I tend to be quiet while scouting but internally I´m screaming when I get a different character. I´m pretty sure I´ve talked about this somewhere before so I´m keeping this a bit shorter but of course they would be really sad too when you say you hate them! They tried so hard to come home to you so you would hopefully put them on your team and use them, but their plan seems to have backfired!

Before hacking into your mic, the characters were kind of aware if they had the honor of being one of your favorite characters or not simply from if you pulled on their banners or not. So they might have feared that you didn´t like them all that much but it hurts so much more to have the confirmation and hear you outright say it

So there are some positives and negatives to this new development. Obviously another positive is when they can hear you singing along to their songs. They feel so proud and love hearing your singing voice too! They wish they could duet with you! But just hearing your praise is already sweet enough ^^

And you´re right that Leo especially would be happy about it because he composes all the songs for Knights so you enjoying them enough to sing them makes him super excited! All his hard work paid off if you´re liking his songs! He will mention this to absolutely every person he meets snfskbf Also gets a new burst of inspiration as soon as he hears you sing. You´re his muse after all!

Nooooo not ensemble straws 😭 I get it anon, I truly do. Gotta be an oof moment for Tsukasa though sjbdldb

[inukag-archive]

Hi! I’m looking for first kiss 💋 InuKag stories set in any universe. It would be really cool to see some suggestions of stories written by people who haven’t been recommended much yet. Thank you!

Hello, anon! We've got a list of some fantastic fics that focus on the first kiss between our beloved InuKag and hope you'll find something you love! Happy reading ❤

The Worst Possible Moment by FireTigerSoul (T)

Inuyasha and Kagome share a serious discussion, one which ends humorously much to Kagome's chagrin. (One-shot)

--

Feminine Wiles by grandlarseny (T)

Kagome's broken Inuyasha's rosary! But fear not! Kaede has another one. But what's this? KAGOME HAS TO PUT IT ON HIM HERSELF? Watch Kagome carry out her kinda evil plots on an unsuspecting half-breed with some SangoMiroku spying on the side.

--

Now What? by Merith (K+)

A bit of fluff after episode 79. Kagome sees Inuyasha as never before!

--

Can't Get Hurt Again by BenjiWrites (G)

Inuyasha and Kagome end up sharing Kagome's bed and talking about their feelings.

--

Stay Close to Me by Emmyyasha (T)

Autumn has come, the leaves have changed, and everyone wants to partake in the joys of the fall festival. Corn mazes, pumpkin patches, warm apple cider. They are perfect to get in the Halloween mood while snuggling up to your loved one. But when Kagome decides to face her fears and enter the haunted house, a day of fun turns into the stuff of nightmares. Good thing Inuyasha, her best friend who is also secretly in love with Kagome, is right there by her side.

--

For You by sarah_writes_stories (M)

They were mocking him. Each and every one of those tiny chocolates in that disgustingly cute square box. They were just sitting there… taunting him… and he hated it. Because Kagome was his, dammit, even if she didn't know it yet.

--

Show and Tell by @clearwillow (T)

The morning after the new moon at Togenkyo, Kagome has some choice words for Inuyasha. He does too, but he's less inclined to say them.

--

Stay By My Side by PotatoButt (G)

Kagome finally gets to return to Inuyasha's time after three years.

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Touch by LianaDawn (Not Rated)

Inuyasha and Kagoma stop to set-up camp while on a mission and things begin to heat-up quickly.

--

A Light in the Dark by @roseheartwhitefox (G)

Inuyasha discovers that Souta is afraid of the dark, and tries to help him overcome it. In the process, he discovers a little but about himself, as he and Souta discuss some of life's biggest questions. Takes place during The Final Act.

--

Fortune Favours the Bold by @mamabearcat (M)

"Dai-kichi! The person you await comes from a distant place. Be bold! It would be good for you to send them a message." Kagome smiled as she traced her fingers over the printed fortune, picturing a dog eared boy with white flowing hair and amber eyes. Inuyasha definitely fit the description of ‘comes from a distant place’ – you couldn’t get more distant than five hundred years into the past. But what sort of message would she want to send him?

--

Just Say It by @lavendertwilight89 & @sapphirestarxx (T)

After visiting with Yuka, Ayumi and Eri, Inuyasha questions Kagome about what a date is--will he like her answer?

--

Ramen by @writemydaydreams (T)

Three years is a long time to be separated from the person you love. Inuyasha had to find a way to cope with Kagome's absence and the possibility he may never see her again. Sometimes support comes from the last place you expect it.

--

The Best I Ever Had by @callmegri (M)

He wanted a music video to leave behind his former image, but he got so much more. AKA what happens when you mix a grumpy rockstar, a sunny actress and a lecherous director. Inspired by Machine Gun Kelly's bloody valentine.

--

Mistaken Intentions by @fawn-eyed-girl (T)

When Inuyasha overhears Kagome's wish on a dandelion to be with him always, he's confused. Aren't they already together, committed, forever? He decides to try and figure out what she means, and how to tell her how he really feels.

[ggukkiereads]

Fic List | Daechwita AUs -Yoongi

This is based on an ask sent a few weeks ago. It was also timely because a few days later, BigHit dropped the sword-practice video (anon is channeling their inner minstradamus =))

So here you go, the day the earth stood still and thirst for Yoongi aka Agust D went rampant, resulting to birth of fics in honor of the king 😅🥰. I remember just binge-reading these for days. So thank you dear authors for feeding on our thirst and whipping out these wonderful fics!

Happy Birthday 🎂 to the coolest and the cutest MinYoongi! #TangerineKitty

S - smut | F - fluff | A - angst | 

Note: if link to fic doesn’t work, click on author and go to their masterlist (works even if author changed url)

Beloved @bang-tan-bitches - one shot | 17.4k | Emperor!Yoongi, Yandere, Thriller | Court was just a game of politics after all. And you intended to win  | S   (this is ashasgfad! That ending)

Checkmate @btsaudge - one shot | 1.9k | King!Yoongi, Tyrant King except to Queen!reader | S, kinda F, PWP

Daechwita @bgyulix - drabble series [5/?]  | 4.5k | Dystopian AU, Childhood Friends, Gang AU, Rebel!Yoongi | a series of drabbles about yoongi and his spy, as they try and topple a king | A, F, S (promising concept)

Daechwita @chemicalpink - drabble series  [3/3] | 6k | Assassin!Reader who got caught, Servant!Reader, Emperor!Yoongi, Historical AU | A, S, F 

Daechwita @ironicarmy - one shot | 3.6k | King!yoongi x Queen!reader, royalty AU | S, PWP, F 🔥🥵💦

Daechwita @jinings - series [2/?] | 20k + | servant!yoongi - king!yoongi, princess!reader, period drama, Historical AU | All that Yoongi knows is that King Park must be killed- he just didn’t plan falling in love with his daughter along the way. | A, F, eventual S 

Daechwita @se0kie - one shot | 3.9k | King!Yoongi x Concubine!Reader, Royalty AU, established relationship (?),  with a twist in the end 😉 | S, PWP 

From the Ashes @fortunexkookie - one shot | 7.4k | Historical AU, Royalty AU, Star-crossed Lovers, inspired by the MV, scarred Yoongi | A, F, S (I love that it capitalized on the theories or snippets of info that came out during MV’s release. I remember reading something about royalty x scars) 

Gwanghae Flow @btssavedmylifeblr - one shot | 3k | Historical PWP | The queen receives a forbidden visitor in the middle of the night | S 

Honsool @bangtanlalaland - one shot | 2.3k | emperor!yoongi x gisaeng!reader  | a little F, S, PWP

Kingdom of Joseon @dreamescapeswriting -  one shot | 7.9k | Agust D x Suga, historical AU | F, A

Make Me Proud @moonscriptsx - one shot | 5.6k | this is kind of different because it is about Daechwita the mixtape, established relationship, Idolverse, Idol!Reader | With the release of his second mixtape and her album, the public are eating up the so-called chart rivalry between (Y/N) and Yoongi | S, PWP, F

Mark of Yun-ki @ladyartemesia - one shot | 8.6k | Hybrid AU/ABO, Fantasy AU, Daechwita AU | S, F

Moonlit Throne @hobidreams - drabble series [29/?] | 40k | Historical AU (Joseok era), Royalty AU, inspired by Daechwita MV | S, F, A 

Rise of the Nation’s King @justimajin - two shot [2/2] | 19k | Historical AU, Royalty AU, like the MV there’s King Agust and Yoongi | A, F, S 

Shadow’s Birthright @thebiasrekkers - series [5/?] | 19k | Historical AU (Joseon era), Fantasy AU, Supernatural AU, Magic, romance, tragedy, eventual love triangle (?), King Yoon vs Min Yoongi  | “two princes are born. But a crown cannot be shared” | A, F, S (this is so fascinating) 

Stay @luffles424 - one shot | 3k | Historical AU, Assassin!Reader, PWP | S, F

Step on Me @honsoolie - drabble | 2k | crack, Idol AU, Yoongi’s shooting for Daechwita MV and reader is the extra (the one Agust D needed to step on during the video 🤣) | F 

Tiger Layer @kimtaehyunq - one shot | 3.6k | King Yoongi, Servant!Reader, You are here to serve your king. In any way he pleases, PWP (lol I remember author used “Yoongi’s royal d*ck” and I cannot forget, cannot unsee 🤣)| S, PWP 🔥🥵💦

The King Isn’t Dead @another-army-spot​ - one shot | 17k | historical AU, political AU, royalty au, potential marriage AU | S, F, A

Whispers @btxtreads - drabble series [4/4] | Historical AU, Yunki vs Yoongi (like in the MV), Empress!Reader, Time Travel (?) | F, A 

The King’s Serpent @apotaeose - drabble | 1.6k | King!Yoongi x Mercenary!Reader | A, light S & F

Note: the fics are Daechwita MV-inspired (the mad king vs rebel yoongi) or about the Daechwita mixtape. This doesn’t include other emperor/king yoongi aus

🌷 posted: 2021 March 9 (KST); updated: 2021 March 14 🌷 other lists 🌷 I love to read so feel free to recommend a fic =)

[sitp-recs]

hi liv i hope you’re doing very well these days! i was wondering if you had any us against the world recs. sort of along the lines of it takes a village by saras_girl <3 thank you!!

Hi anon, thanks for the ask! I love this trope and if that’s okay, decided to include a few different takes here. Most of what I read is what I call the “be gay, do crimes” trope which explores some exciting themes like conspiracy, revolution and my beloved hitmen trope 🔥 I haven’t read many fics similar to It Takes a Village - mostly because I don’t read the 8th year trope much, but also because the ones I do usually have a really united and supportive crew. But I tried to think of a few options where they go against fate and everyone else’s opinion by sticking together. Hope these work :)

Sticking together:

Sharing a Pack by sugar_screw (2016, E, 2.7k)

A fight. A fuck. A smoke. A small love story.

Let Me Have You and I'll Let You Save Me by Frayach (2012, M, 6k)

Draco keeps coming back, and Harry keeps letting him. Draco can’t stay away, and Harry can’t live without him.

Our Ordinary Days by Lomonaaeren (2012, M, 8.4k)

Two men, both fathers of sons, meet in a bookshop. And the rest is the kind of history that doesn't make history.

Silence series by RurouniHime (2011, E, 10k)

It was his battle, yet he never hurt me, and he could have.

A Song, Incomplete by RurouniHime (2013, E, 11k)

Draco’s photograph took up the entire top half of the Prophet’s front page. Below the photo: DRACO MALFOY DEFENDS SON OF FORMER LOVER. As if that were breaking news.

Reparatio by astolat (2016, E, 17k)

Draco snorted. “I’m not reduced to penury. I want something considerably beyond money, and I rather think you’re the only one can give it to me.”

Sun Thief by BlackRose532, floydig (E, 28k)

Or: Harry beats up a pimp and isn’t sorry about it, Draco deals black market potions, and they’re shagging. Again.

Expecto Patronum by @writcraft (2015, E, 35k)

As Draco Malfoy negotiates his feelings for the wizarding world's brightest star, he becomes increasingly attached to Harry and unravels the secrets he keeps hidden from the rest of the world.

The Wand Slipped by @unmistakablyoatmeal (2019, E, 35k)

After a messy, public divorce and a disgraceful exit from the Auror Department, Harry is trying to rebuild his life as a private investigator.

Reparo by amalin (2008, E, 84k)

Voldemort's final defeat does not mean Harry Potter's troubles are over; far from it. In the aftermath of war, he returns to a Hogwarts that is fractured and divided, but this is no break that can be fixed with a spell.

Far From The Tree by aideomai (2020, E, 112k)

The arrival of Harry Potter’s children—snapped back in time, the children themselves guessed, twenty or so years—was the most interesting thing to happen at Hogwarts for years.

Things Worth Knowing by @femmequixotic (2017, E, 164k)

After the Battle, Harry thinks he's left Hogwarts for good, but Minerva insists that all students return for an Eighth Year if they wish to sit for NEWTs in the spring, and Harry needs those NEWTs to go into the Aurors.

Temptation on the Warfront by alizarincrims0n (2015, E, 180k)

Draco Malfoy is forced into hiding with the Golden Trio and dragged into their search for horcruxes. What ensues is a journey of redemption, unexpected friendships and an unwanted, turbulent romance with Harry Potter.

Tales from the Special Branch series by @femmequixotic (2017, E, WIP)

When Gawain Robards asks him to form Special Branch seven-four-alpha, Harry Potter knows they'll have to work outside the confines of the law--even though they are the law.

Revolution/conspiracy/hitmen AU:

Intelligence by aideomai (2018, T, 6k)

“I don’t believe it,” Ginny said, voice low with venom and fury. “Did you know?”. “I knew there was a spy,” Hermione said.

A Cold Spot in Hell by @drarrytrash (2020, E, 8k)

When there’s nothing left to burn, you have to set yourself on fire.

My Hands Are Of Your Colour by @ohdrarry (2020, E, 8k)

Sometimes spilled blood lingers on guilty hands. Draco sees red and Harry washes it clean.

Two Zinnias and the Scent of Lemon, unrevealed author (2021, M, 16k)

The Ministry didn’t turn bad overnight. Harry didn’t suddenly turn rogue either. Between covert Legilimency links and Polyjuice disguises and running and running and running, Draco has forgotten what it is like to have a safe harbor that isn’t a person.

you look so fine by michi_thekiller (2013, E, 16k)

In which Draco is a Veela and Harry is his mate. Dark!Humor or Crack!Horror, you decide.

Violent Delights by @primavera-cerezos (2021, E, 20k)

Draco Malfoy's life should be going very well. He's engaged to a wonderful man and in line for the Head Auror job. He's been made lead investigator on a serial murder case, trying to figure out who is killing off the scum of the wizarding world, one by one. So what if he's kind of miserable? Things always get better.

Burn the Curtains and the Wine by @nerdherderette (2019, E, 24k)

There are two versions of Harry Potter: the wizard who is the Ministry of Magic's most dangerous and successful assassin, and the husband who leads a staid life of domesticity with a reformed Death Eater.

If an Injury Is to Be Inflicted by @shealwaysreads (2020, E, 45k)

Harry Potter disappeared a year after the Battle of Hogwarts, and with him went all hope for true change in magical Britain.

REVOLVEVLOVER by @firethesound and @lol-zeitgeistic (2014, E, 46k)

The work Harry does is justifiable. It’s justice. He works for his country, and his country is a republic—the magical side, anyway. It’s not laudable work, it’s not work he’s proud of, but it’s necessary work. Harry has always taken the necessary jobs that no one else has the stomach for.

Crown Witness by @slytherco (2020, E, 70k)

When Harry Potter goes to interrogate a potential witness, he doesn’t expect to end up on the run again, trying to keep Draco Malfoy alive, while a manhunt follows in their footsteps, adamant on eliminating the one witness that could ruin everything.

Super Rich Kids by @thusspoketrish (2020, E, 81k)

Draco Malfoy has become disillusioned by the glitz and glamour of the scandalous lives of the Post-Second Wizarding War Pureblood Elite. Enter: one existential crisis, one group of thieving cynical friends, and several terrible, terrible decisions.

Who we are in the shadows by @quicksilvermaid (2019, E, 99k)

What happens when you’re forced to become the very thing you despise?

A Sword Laid Aside by @korlaena (2018, E, 128k)

When Draco’s cover is blown during a deep undercover operation and the Ministry is compromised, Ron takes Draco to the only safe place he can think of—Potter.

[queerfortress2]

hi, spy anon again here!! love love loving everything you guys write, it's so awesome <3

i was hoping to request just general spy dating headcanons? i read the medic one and it was divine. keep up the good work and i hope you guys have a good weekend :3 !

IM SO SORRY MY FAV ANON YOU'VE BEEN LEFT ON THE EDGE FOR SO LONG. i return to help you out. with our fav sopping wet cat - MOD MEDIC

GN!READER X SPY ; GENERAL HEADCANONS

in my heart of hearts? hes big on gift giving. the man sucks emotionally so the only way he can desperately remind you that he is in love with you is by giving you gifts. you look at a necklace for too long? congrats he's now getting you that necklace but CUSTOMLY COMMISSIONED FROM BELGIUM. and now its dropped at your door like he isn't the only man who gives you those extravagant gifts. you KNOW its him.

he LIKES physical affection, but he's doesn't know how to GIVE physical affection. like he's suave until he is now laying in bed with you and trying to initiate what the kids would call 'cuddling'. you think he's all cool when he's wrapping his arm around you but no. no he's internally screaming hoping you don't look at him funny while he does it. spy is NOT cool

his smoking room is now a shared space, no matter how much he does complain you're invading his wine room, he lets you in every time. just don't touch anything. ever. at all.

he isn't the best times, i mean he'll come to a late night date, but also remember he's a mercenary and unless you're ALSO a mercenary, you won't be seeing him often during the day, he just somehow makes it into your house and you don't exactly know how or why he's entering at 2 am.

but he's there. and he brought two glasses. so does it matter?

is. unfortunately gone by morning. the man is up and out of there before anyone can catch him walking about. after all he IS a famed mercenary and teufort DOES want him dead. so its a bit hard to be domestic there.

the mask stays on. so sorry, but he does not take that thing off around you until you are YEAARS into that relationship. perhaps if he retires? but while actively in the job he keeps the whole identity thing for the full 9 yards ahead. god forbid you ever learn his name.

HES REALLY BAD IF YOU THINK ABOUT IT FOR MORE THAN TWO SECONDS

and i love him. mwah mwah xoxo

[kaypeace21]

Omg!! The Stranger Thibgs Official Acc (well...I’m 99% sure it is) posted a video! It’s a bunch of static on these TV thingys with background opera music and they each show a picture of something with uhm blood on it. What do you think? Although You acc probably haven’t seen this yet since they literally JUST posted it lmao.

yep looked it up .The vid obviously hints at brenner’s return like we all suspected-  monitors like the ones used to spy on El and Will at hawkins lab, pic of doors, the rainbow room, eeg machines (all 4 things are associated with Will/El). A bloody 8 ball (uh oh Kali in danger?). The monitors also were filled with static -which indicates El tracking someone .And we all suspected El and Kali would team up to track Brenner-so that makes sense. I also still think the gals and Will  also end up at pethurst (for diff reasons) - talked about that theory a long time ago. Also an anon just mentioned how there are  7 screens so it could connected to Will too (”it was a 7 it got me”). 

other strange things I noticed- we see a bloody chess board and then later bloody dice like d&d dice maybe (probably indicating a plan or plans of our heroes doesn’t go as expected)? Like-bloody 8 ball, bloody chess board,�� bloody dice, plus there was also something else with blood that I couldn’t recognize-  regardless sounds like multiple plans may go wrong for our heroes.

the song choice.Quand le bien-aimé reviendra from the story  ou La folle par amour (The Woman Crazed with Love). cough “crazy together/”only love makes you that crazy”. 

Nina is in love with Germeuil but her father (lonnie), dissaproves. Germeuil and his rival fight a duel. Nina believes that Germeuil has been killed and goes mad, forgetting aspects of the traumatic incident in a manner consistent with a diagnosis of psychogenic amnesia (cough did has similar amnesia too after tr*uma).  Before this though her father separated the 2 and she had already gone mad without him. Nina” is essentially “a young woman  forced by a repressive male relative (her father) to abandon her lover, whereupon she promptly goes mad.”She only regains her reason when Germeuil reappears unharmed . cough me who has seen the st movies and know Will thinking Mike is dead may go dark phoenix... yep. Although i thought that’d be like s5 stuff.

Song lyrics: “When one’s beloved returns close to his lovesick friend, the spring is reborn, the grass will always bloom. But I look around— alas ! My beloved does not return...my beloved’s tender voice will paint its raptures and flames for you, because it is for him to teach you. (Will is a painter, has firepowers, and is a friend)

AND NAH, This isn’t m*leven, we saw what happened when her dad separated  her from Mike in s3- she had a dance party with Max, looked at other boys in a magazine,  and said Hopper was right and they were spending too much time together. And in response to Mike’s love/crazy confession just says “What makes you crazy?”

also, we may get something tommorrow cause the caption on youtube says hawkins lab will be working at 9am tomorrow?

[nordleuchten]

can you talk about Laf's about André's hanging? I've never looked too deep into that...

Hello Anon,

pardon me that it took me so long to come back to you but life just got in the way. Anywhere, thank you for the question. La Fayette had a very central role in the André-Arnold debacle. He was with Washington at West Point when Arnolds treason was discovered and when André was arrested. La Fayette (and the others officers) were told that a spy had been captured but they did not know the identity of said man at first, The fact that it was Major John André came as quite a surprise. La Fayette wrote his first detailed report of the event in a letter to the Chevalier de La Luzerne on September 26, 1780

You can imagine our astonishment when upon our return we learned that the arrested spy was Major Andre, adjutant general of the British army, and when, among documents found on him, we recognized a transcript of a very important council of war, a description of the garrison and fortifications, and remarks about methods of attack and defense, all of which were written in General Arnold's hand. The British adjutant general also wrote to the general disclosing his name and situation. We sent a person in pursuit of Arnold; but he had escaped by boat to board the English frigate Vulture, and since no one suspected his flight, no one from the posts could have thought to arrest him. Colonel Hamilton, who had pursued him, shortly thereafter received a flag of truce with a letter from Arnold for the general, in 180 Light Camp Commander which he gives no details to justify his treason, and a letter from the British commander Robinson, who, in an extremely insolent manner, demanded the release of the adjutant general, on the grounds that he had acted entirely under General Arnold's permission.

La Fayette sat from September 29 to September 30, 1780 on the court-martial of John André. He wrote to the Vicomte de Noailles (the husband of his sister-in-law) about his role in the proceeding on October 3, 1780.

Arnold's baseness and villainy surpass in their details all that I have ever read about that sort of thing. The anger I felt over it did not extend to his wife, with whom formerly I had been somewhat taken. But what has truly afflicted me is the necessity of hanging the adjutant general of the British army, a charming man who conducted himself throughout, and died, like a hero. This severity was necessary; the enemy acted very stupidly on this occasion, and since they lost that unfortunate man, the soul of their army, they have not written one letter that had common sense. Andre was executed yesterday. General Clinton's anger does not frighten us, but this man's death, although inevitable in my opinion, left me with a feeling of sadness and respect for his character. I truly suffered in condemning him; but he was an officer under disguised clothing and name, passing within our posts with papers full of intelligence for the enemy, and he himself did not hesitate to recognize himself as a spy.

La Fayette stated further in his Memoirs:

It is impossible to express too much respect or too deep regret for Major André. The fourteen general officers who had the painful task of pronouncing his sentence, the commander-in-chief, and the whole American army, were filled with sentiments of admiration and compassion for him. The conduct of the English in a preceding circumstance had been far from being similar. Captain Hale, of Connecticut, a distinguished young man, beloved by his family and friends, had been taken on Long Island, under circumstances of the same kind as those that occcasioned the death of Major André; but, instead of being treated with the like respect, to which Major Andr�� himself bore testimony, Captain Hale was insulted to the last moment of his life.

As La Fayette wrote it himself in his letter and in his Memoirs, he voted as well that André should be executed. La Fayette was not the only general on this tribunal. Serving with him were Major General Greene (President of the Board), Major General Lord Stirling, Major General St. Clair, Major General Howe (Robert Howe, not the British Howe), Major General The Baron de Steuben, Brigadier General Parsons, Brigadier General Clinton (George Clinton, not the British Clinton), Brigadier General Knox, Brigadier General Glover, Brigadier General Patterson, Brigadier General Hand, Brigadier General Huntington, Brigadier General Starke, John Lawrence (Judge-Advocate General). They declared that:

The Board having considered the letter from his Excellency General Washington respecting Major Andrè, Adjutant General to the British army, the confession of Major Andrè, and the papers produced to them, REPORT to His Excellency, the Commander in Chief, the following facts, which appear to them relative to Major Andrè.

First, That he came on shore from the Vulture sloop of war in the night of the twenty-first of September instant, on an interview with General Arnold, in a private and secret manner.

Secondly, That he changed his dress within our lines, under a feigned name, and in a disguised habit, passed our works at Stoney and Verplank's Points, the evening of the twenty-second of September instant, and was taken the morning of the twenty-third of September instant, Tarry Town, in a disguised habit, being then on his way to New-York, and when taken, he had in his possession several papers, which contained intelligence for the enemy.

The Board having maturely considered these facts, DO ALSO REPORT to His Excellency General Washington, That Major Andrè, Adjutant General to the British army, ought to be considered as a Spy from the enemy, and that agreeable to the law and usage of nations, it is their opinion, he ought to suffer death.

The final statement of the board, as well as several letters connected to the case, statements of witnesses, a statement by André, a note with all the condemning evidence found on Andrés person and other papers were collected and ordered by Congress to be printed as a pamphlet under the name PROCEEDINGS OF A Board of General Officers, Held by Order of his Excellency General WASHINGTON, commander in chief of the army of the United States of America, respecting Major André, Adjutant General of the British army, September the 29th, 1780, at Tappan, in the State of New-York. You can read the report in full here, if you are interested.

I hope that helped with your question and I hope you have/had beautiful day!

[kae-karo]

The beloved Kaeya for the ask game

the beloved kaeya indeed 🥺👏 tyty anon!!!!

How I feel about this character:

rose asked me once why tf i put kaeya in my 3rd slot when i use him as a dps/sub dps (for her, those are 1st/2nd slots), and i was like 'uh idk' only to realize that he's there because when i got him, he was automatically put into the 3rd slot. and literally i haven't taken him out of my overworld party since then. i feel like that says basically everything u need to know lmao

but! i will wax poetic anyway. i think his design is dumb and sexy and obnoxious and i love it, it suits his personality perfectly and makes him look sus as hell with the eyepatch that he wears supposedly just 'because'. everything abt his personality is WONDERFUL and so much fun, i absolutely love writing his perspective cause it's so interesting. he's so deeply intertwined with the lore by virtue of being khaenri'ahn, which adds like twelve more layers to the iceberg that is kaeya, plus his whole actual backstory itself? and you never know if he's lying or flattering or being earnest, it just adds so much depth to his personality

from a gameplay perspective, he's not exceptionally interesting, but he is absolutely reliable, and i've been using him in a freeze comp with childe since i got childe lmao. i also actually adore his lil teleport, though he has the same issue with his E that diluc does with his Q, which is that sometimes the targeting is Bad lmao

overall, i adore this man deeply

All the people I ship romantically with this character:

diluc (duh) and childe, in that order. often diluc and childe at the same time lmao. albedo! i do like a good kaebedo every now and then. i'd ship him with zhongli but from a writing perspective i tend not to have much to go on.

My non-romantic OTP for this character:

rosaria is the big one, within mond. i also love a good benny/kaeya mentorship type role. i think he could take a similar one with chongyun? i think kaeya and kazoo would be two sides of the same mischievous coin, too. when i'm shipping kaeluc exclusively, i love a good chaeya friendship lmao. oh! i think beidou and kaeya could be great drinking/pirate buddies, and i'd love to see him talk strategy with kokomi

My unpopular opinion about this character:

i mean off the bat, kaeluc lmao. beyond that, i'm not sure i have any unpopular opinions? i think i can get behind most hcs of him that i've seen, and i don't think i have many thoughts that other ppl would disagree with about him lmao

oh, maybe this - i really don't agree with the idea of him being like...canonically cold/heartless? i think a lot of ppl reference the 'that's...interesting' line when crepus dies or the fact that he endangers his men in combat, but i think it's more complicated than that? i talked about it somewhere at some point, but i really like the idea that, because he has spent his whole life being forced to make impossible decisions, he wants others around him to feel the same way. wants to test their loyalty, perhaps. i also am not certain that his 'interesting' comment was some offhand, cold comment about crepus' death, but rather a reference to the use of his delusion or even diluc's actions

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon:

more interactions with diluc, not even in a kaeluc capacity just...i want their reconciliation in canon. i want them both to admit that they're stuck in the past with regards to each other - kaeya believes that diluc detests him when diluc really is still struggling to reconcile the fact that he doesn't feel like he can trust kaeya with the fact that he still cares about him. diluc believes that kaeya's forgotten all about their past and either never cared about diluc to begin with or no longer cares. they're both idiots and i want to see them figure that out

also just generally more kaeya backstory? even a kaeya hangout 😭😭

my OTP:

kaeluckae. i swear for every fic i write of another pairing, i write three or four kaeluc fics lmao. i can't help it, their story just has so many layers in canon, let alone how much more you can put into it with fic. the brainrot is real

my cross over ship:

once again, not really something i can speak to much...that said, i'd love to see how kaeya and hawks interact, or how kaeya and dabi interact lmaoooo

a headcanon fact:

i still wouldn't be shocked if kaeya wasn't ever actually intended to be a khaenri'ahn spy, if he misinterpreted the 'you're our last hope' line that his father gave him. i'm also still on board with the 'dain is kaeya's father' or 'kaeya is the last prince of khaenri'ah' theories. lots of fun with kaeya, i really love his character 🥺🥺

send me genshin ships/chars to talk abt or rank!

[ameliapodcast]

Tumblr, beloved hellsite.

I didn't even know this was a thing, but I'm glad it is!

We love our hellsite, don't get me wrong, but it wasn't until, I guess yesterday that I came across this. So, story time!

I don't really have a reason why I started listening to this, except for some strange post linking this to Wooden Overcoats and Victoriocity, something about dark humour and Brits. In any case, I was SOLD. Still am, actually.

(You're not actually British, are you, Assistant? Good, neither am I.)

Well, my story is kinda unrelated to how I actually got here, but it's too good not to share. So, just yesterday, we(a friend and I) were goofing off, as can be expected by people who know me(I have a Tumblr, but it is for this reason I am choosing to be anonymous, since all my classmates know I'm on here due to me basically announcing that I fill my butt with orange juice; if you know, you know.), and before we knew it, we began people-watching.

At first, it was simple- invent a story about a random person walking down the street. One was a spy working for the alien government, involved in a conspiracy, another was secretly three chinchillas in a trench coat. One was a storytelling sensation(what I want to be when I grow up) pumping out pages of stories at abnormal rates, another was an overworked assistant in a cult, forever organizing sermons for their Almighty Head.

The stories progressively got wilder, until we got to discussing what it would be like faking their deaths. We started small enough, digging small holes and quickly providing replacement bodies, sneaking off the real person. I'll admit I borrowed some stuff from the podcast.

I joked about starting a business, only for them to groan: "Oh, not you too."

I was confused. "Huh?"

" I heard this just yesterday, it's called the Alfalfa Project, right?" The Alfalfa Project?

I-

"How did you know?"

"Know what?"

"That I'm the Alfalfa anon?

"Oh please, no one bungles names like you do."

"True."

No, but seriously, how DID they know? Squinty eyes. We continued people watching and faking their deaths for another hour. So, if you're in the neighbourhood, look me up? Just kidding. (Or am I?)

Bungled permanently in the head,

The Alfalfa A non ymous

Alternatively - people-watching escalated and it's great! To be honest, this ask is so batshit crazy I just won't add anything to it because it's better enjoyed... Just like that. Thank you so much for sharing! We are happy to be of inspiration!

- Intern

[leonameowzz]

I have this one thought stuck in my head 😹 imagine booping the Twst boys noses

Imagine no longer anon!!! Here are some scenarios w/f our fav twst boys, please enjoy~

Hippity Hoppity, everyone’s noses go Boppity 👉👃👈

“Say ahh Riddle”, you coaxed your boyfriend during the recent Unbirthday party. His face was redder than the strawberry tart you were trying to feed him but he eventually relented. Satisfied, you bop him on the nose causing the rest of the dorm to cheer for you.

Ace was the one who bopped your nose first when you were teasing each other. Safe to say it escalated into a competition between you two which lasted the whole day as you try to one-up each other.

Deuce froze after you playfully bop him on the nose, as physical interactions were usually aggressive rather than affectionate for him. He awkwardly hugs you back, apologizing that he wasn’t used to such gestures.

You and Trey were baking in the Heartslabyul kitchen when you bop his nose with frosting on your finger. He raises his eyebrow as you giggled, before pulling you towards him, bopping your nose  with frosting back.

Cater was caught off guard when you bop his nose during a couple pic, resulting in his surprised face being captured on camera. He pesters you to take another one, though this time he gets to bop you instead!

Leona was napping on your lap when you bop him nose. “Herbivore...” he mutters slowly, pulling you down into a hug onto him. He nuzzles his nose against yours, purring to reciprocate your earlier affections.

You found Ruggie picking dandelions, with already bloomed puffs stuck in his hair from the wind blowing. Finding it too wholesome, you bop him on the nose, offering to help as he chuckles and pinches your cheek.

You proudly bop Jack on the nose when he’s done practicing Magishift, praising him for doing so well and can’t help notice his tail wagging excitedly although he casually brushes off your compliments.

Azul is engrossed in sorting out his contracts, when you approach his desk calling him sweetly. You bop his nose when he faces you, urging him to rest causing him to blush slightly as he sets aside his paperwork to accompany his beloved.

Floyd was having one of his mood swings so you bop him on the nose asking him to cheer up, as you give him your best puppy dog eyes. He immediately brightens up, squeezing you tightly and cooing how much he enjoys your touches.

Jade serves you your favourite drink at Mostro Lounge, “One mermaid frappe with extra cream just for you~” You hum a thanks in response and bop his nose. He’s surprised but recovers quickly and reaches for your hand, planting a soft kiss on the back of it.

Kalim takes you on a magic carpet ride, zipping over sideways and under at top speed. He finally stops above the clouds laughing at how cute you look holding him so tightly. Huffing at him for going so fast purposely, you bop him on the nose playfully.

Jamil is exhausted from helping Kalim prepare another impromptu party. As you brush the sweat off his face, you bop his nose to cheer him up, earning a sly smirk from him as he gives you multiple butterfly kisses.

Vil stomps into his room, ranting to you about how much he loathes Neige. You bop him on the nose reassuring him that he was the most beautiful to you. He melts into your touch, grateful you were around to soothe his nerves.

Rook, your lab partner for the day was staring intently out the window, presumably spying on Leona. Amused by his fascination, you bop his nose reminding him to pay attention. “Pardon Ma Cherie!” he exclaims, giving you a peck on the cheek as an apology.

Epel borrowed a horse from the equestrian club to take you for a ride. After showing off his riding abilities, your heart swells with pride as you bop his nose, gushing over how cool he looked. He feels very touched and promises to keep improving himself for you.

Idia was sulking after having an unlucky day with online raids, until you bop his nose before kissing him deeply. His hair flares a fiery red as he buries his face in your shoulder, immediately getting distracted from his game but not caring as much anymore.

Ortho was curious to this gesture, especially after seeing Idia’s reaction. He questions you about it, only to get bopped on the nose too as you cheerfully state it’s a sign of affection, one that he certainly deserves since you see him as your little brother too.

After Malleus escorts you back after your usual midnight stroll one night, you quickly bop him on the nose while tiptoeing before running inside blushing. The fae prince is stunned by your actions though elated, making a mental note to ask Lilia for tips on how to return the affections.

Lilia attempts to tease you with his upside down schtick only for you to surprise him first by bopping him on the nose. Aren’t you the mischievous one? He praises your quick thinking, before pressing his forehead against yours lovingly.

You find Silver napping in the school courtyard peacefully among his animal friends and crouch beside him, bopping his nose gently. He stirs slightly at your touch but doesn’t wake. You stay by his side, making sure to wake him up before his next lesson.

“Hey Sebek, sorry not sorry for this”, as you bop his nose playfully, making him blush furiously at your bold actions. He rants to his Diasomnia members later, saying it’s illegal for you to pull such adorable antics, while the others only smirk knowingly.