#Resolving Anger Issues
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Anger is a natural emotion that everyone experiences, but it can become problematic if not managed effectively. In the context of behavioral health in Roxbury, Massachusetts, individuals may encounter situations where anger feels overwhelming. Recognizing triggers and understanding emotional responses is crucial for healthily managing anger. Developing self-awareness can help individuals identify the early signs of anger and employ strategies to regain control before it escalates.
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The COBRA representative if not responsible for the frustration I feel for the world at large The COBRA representative if not responsible for the frustration I feel for the world at large The COBRA representative if not responsible for the frustration I feel for the world at large
#dumb babbles#They ARE however responsible for my mother's insurance lapsing despite my asking them to resolve the issue LAST MONTH#I must not take my anger out on the person on the phone I must not take my anger out on them#I'm allowed to cuss and express frustration but it is not their fault until it is#I'm a bitch not a karen#I should be in Europe following my fav band on tour rn not this shit
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You know, it actually is completely possible that Jess and Dean were an (offscreen) canon couple. They live in the same state, after all (albeit two hours away from each other). Dean seems to have matured offscreen after disappearing in season 5: when we see him in AYITL he's settled, happy, mature, and seemingly well-adjusted. That barely restrained incoherent rage seems to be gone, as well as any real desire to reminisce too closely with Rory. We know that Jess is also happy, accomplished, and secure in the life he has chosen. It's possible that sometimes between when we lose track of Dean and when we see the boys in AYITL that they came to terms with their bisexuality, finally exhausted their sexual frustration with each other, and had a mutually satisfying relationship before going their separate ways.
We know that Dean had a child and was presumably married by 2011: he seems to have the traditional life he always wanted, but maybe he wasn't as traditional as he thought he was. It's nice to think that some time with Slutty Philadelphia Jess helped him loosen up and finally shed some of his more problematic tendencies.
So for a time, DeanJess could have been canon. At least in my head.
#apparently the way to resolve dean's anger issues was just to have sex with jess mariano#a service he has provided for many others i'm sure#jess mariano#dean forester#slutty philadelphia jess#deanjess
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While he’s perfectly capable of handling himself on his own, Riddle tends to get anxious if Cater or Trey aren’t immediately within eyesight.
#hc; riddle#//Its the ✨ Attachment Issues ✨#//But also bc he sees them both as calming presences to him#//Bc he knows if either is in the vicinity; any potential problems will be resolved before he himself becomes aware of them#//He appreciates that greatly; much less stress for him and more anger reducing#//Without them around; things are less likely to be within a tolerable limit & his sense/need of control & Order tends to make him testier#//Deuce and Ace have recently begun to be this for him too—if a Trey or Cater are not immediately available; a Deuce or Ace works just fine#//Even a Yuu will work just fine; ESP after his Overblot incident#//All this; and also just the fact that he doesn’t actually like being apart from those he deems friends as is
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finally wrote (thematically relevant 🧐☝️) smut and it's for b/ridgerton-coded fantasy guy from video game who could have predicted this
#chelle.txt#i've had a mental block about this for YEARS#i finally did it. thank you j/ulia q/uinn for teaching me everything i know bless#what reading 22 j/ulia q/uinn novels will do to a woman in her 20s HAHA#when he has anger issues (?) and one (1) simple conflict that can be easily resolved within the narrative <333 yayy#hahaha#scrutinizing myself and stuff but its okay yay#wow i really did read 22. thats a lot#eta: idk if its any good but i tried and thats what counts yay :D
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also despite how much i love fooling around and exploring nice things with l4d i do very much acknowledge these people are having the absolute worst time of their entire lives. especially zoey. oh my god honey you are so fucking traumatised
#gifted kid who got burnt out (she has a scholarship but was about to drop out of college)#<- i forgot abt the scholarship thing until last night like ohhh fuck!! even worse than i thought!!#she watched her parents die right in front of her. she realises she didnt have to kill her dad before a big fight with her new father figure#and then he dies before they can resolve the issue#zoey makes me insane#btw thanks valve for overshadowing her grief and anger with haha funny boy has stupid crush isnt that sweet and cute and funny#i love ellis a lot but he fills me with rage in the passing.#how could you make me hate him for even a second hes a great lad#morskiwords
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i'm going to smash my door with a hammer
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the pages are becoming much smaller as the numbers are dwindlin huh :(
okay so njano DID know sumu was there and they had a scuffle, glad they didn't kill each other tho- njano is at least somewhat saner than shupavu (who has 3 kills now btw)
and the same with janja! i knew he'd do something eventually and i'm glad it wasn't resorting to killing, let alone killing nduli- WAIT A MINUTE. JANJA PROBABLY FOUGHT NDULI BECAUSE HE KILLED CHEEZI. BUT JANJA COULDN'T BARE TO TAKE HIS LIFE. AAAAAH
kenge wants to be alone after killing his best friend and a child, understandable...
AWWW REIREI AND MADOA THAT'S SO WHOLESOME!! madoa prolly ran out of medic supplies after treating nduli so reirei helps her! :')
HELP WHY ARE THE THREE ANIMALS LEAST LIKELY TO SING SONGS TOGETHER SINGING SONGS TOGETHER HFFGDHGHJ???
part 8. this is gonna go on isn't it- but i'm havin fun!
#outlanders hunger games#tlg outlanders#hunger games simulator#reirei has been so calm after murdering chungu and mwoga-#girl had some anger issues she had to resolve ig#unless goigoi died BEFORE and she took it out on the idiots idk#ALSO the janja and nduli bit is a look into my live reaction. i was really like WAIT A FUCKING SECOND.#the lore deepens THE LORE IS EXPANDINGGG
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Hey, have you ever tried DBT? Most effective therapy I have ever tried. Helped me a lot with my perception of other people, judgements of myself/others, and this sense that it's me against everyone else.
Idk, arguing with people and claiming everyone who disagrees with you is on an 'ivory tower' kind of seems like you may have some issues with black and white thinking. I suppose this makes sense if you literally debate for a living. Anyway, I'm not here to psychoanalyze you.
I don't suppose you'd be in the mood to be introspective over an anon ask, but your attitude towards NPD is kinda shitty as far as I can tell. You're perpetuating a stigma towards cluster b personality disorders by generalizing and assuming people you don't like have the 'evil' disorder. People with NPD are capable of being good people, as with anyone else. Anyone can put in the work.
Hope you have a good night, or whatever part of the day you're in. The world is scary and we are all just taking part in bullshit infighting when people are being sent to death camps and people watch.
DBT has been a large reason I say what I say tbh! NPD is real but being a dick and justifying it through disability is not which is why I don’t like the ND crowd weaponizing and pathologizing bigotry.
I have just recently realized how GREY everything is coming from a very Religious bg and also realize that shame really IS effective and something I thought everyone else understood too but uh… wow the privilege some people (especially on the internet!!) have 🙃
#ask#anon#I am aware of how I sound#DBT is amazing#and yet lol#it will not resolve systemic issues without action so uh…#lean into the discomfort y’all#never felt more secure after overcoming trauma#and yet there are always consequences#but I’m not afraid just… acknowledging justified anger#because I can’t accept it if I don’t get pissed about it too y’know?
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You know what, I'm dropping this rant about the mental healthcare circus clownshow I'd been run around here too. Str8 from a boobtoob comment section,
lol the psychologist i went to put in her shoddy notes (that other doctors can't seem to find half the time?) that she assessed me for adhd. she didn't. the only time she diagnosed me with anything, she took the big ol psyche book and started reading from one page and asking "does this fit?"
and sure, yeah, it did, at the time, while i was on a ssri that the gp put me on when i went at the behest of my brother to ask about autism (something an aunt that sees me a lot also thinks i may have). although he knew my mother had recently passed and i was still, you know, sad, like people tend to be when a family member becomes deceased, … he diagnosed me with depression and anxiety (the general practitioner, the doctor, not a therapist, not a psych) and gave me a script for prozac.
which pretty much zombified me. when i told him this he said, word for word, "that means it's working."
so the psychologist, she saw me and diagnosed me while i was emotionally numbed on a medication i didn't need, and she won't re-assess me.
i went to a different doctor, a nurse practitioner, and she sent me to a different psychologist… not for the second opinion that i wanted. oh, no. it was to "reaffirm" the first one's diagnosis.
so basically a waste of 2.3 hours because the second psychologist is in the city an hour away.
he prescribed me a new medication, welbutrin. turns out i can't take that medication - rather, i'm not taking the risk, thank you. the "not recommended if you have a family history of glaucoma" did not come up in his office. i had to read it on the leaflet that came with the pills.
i still can't focus even on my hobbies. even now i'm procrastinating writing a reply to someone that i WANT to write, by writing this instead. the house is a mess because when i look at the garbage i'm like, oh, i'll take care of that later; no, i never do, but actually getting around to dealing with it feels impossible. just like my hobbies.
i want to draw. my tablet is RIGHT THERE. i'm RIGHT HERE at the computer. i can just reach over and open the program… i have ideas and things i want to draw… but no. i'll do it, sure, after this video. but that video turns into two. three. five hours later i have to walk the dog. i get back. mmm i'll draw… after i check my messages… maybe after i find a good song… oh that video looks cool… oh it's five hours later again. time to sleep.
rinse and repeat. i can't get anything done outside of very rare times i manage to forcibly break through the "mmm maybe after…"
and when i mention my anger issues that are hair-trigger to set off i get brushed away. i say "i had a small breakdown crying and screaming because i messed up my pancakes" or "i threw a heavy object because of a very minor inconvenience" or "i kicked a hole in the door because i was angry over something irrational" or "i tore the cabinet door off its hinges because a very small annoyance made me THAT angry" and i'm met with "oh, but you didn't hurt anyone, did you?" no. not yet. i'd like to get these issues sorted before i do, preferably. seems that won't be happening either though! but hey! at least when it happens i can say i tried!
#psychology#mental health#<- I'm leaning on side Fuck You All; You're All Quacks#Had three therapists too. The last one I actually mentioned my anger issues to.#'Oh my son got angry the other day too :) he almost threw his phone... but the issue he had resolved itself...'#Ok. So??????#I kicked a hole in my door over a stupid thing that just fucking set me off.#I've torn a cabinet door off its hinges over something equally as stupid.#I don't want to do these things. I just get that uncontrollably angry. And it has been getting worse over the years.#So tell me again how I am comparable to your fucking son?#That was the last time I saw her because she had the gal to ask if I was 'getting anything out of our sessions'#No you stupid fucking cunt.#Clearly not.
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Fuck yes
ive finished tsc. and i need to share some thoughts and hcs on lucas johnson before i looooose my mindddddd tsc spoilers under the cut (please dont fight me if you see them i warned you and tagged it and i will cry)
he and grayson were really close growing up - their parents were abusive and grayson was the only one who protected him
hes really attached to the older trojans (like jeremy) because hes subconsciously trying to find someone to replace the hole his brother left him with
he hates hates hates black because of the ravens but he chose usc both because they were the opposite of the ravens, but also because the red on their uniforms still sort of connected him with his brother. when he saw the away jerseys for the ravens (black on red) he could pretend the red was for usc and it helped him
he emailed and texted his brother for the entire first year he was away with no response, until one day the messages stopped going through
his parents blamed him for the way grayson behaved when he was home
#lucas johnson#grayson johnson#aftg#my hc is that grayson pre-nest already had anger/violence issues but hid them from lucas and they werent THAT BAD#and then the nest were basically like ‘yeah its fine you can do that here’ and everything went off the rails’#i think all the time about his paremts KNEW that grayson punched lucas hard enough to knock out 2 (i think) of his teeth#and they just didnt resolve anything!! they just let grayson stay in that house even as lucas#‘hit the ground running’ like their parents are fr weird
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cruel- c.sainz

꩜summary: an argument means he says some things he doesn't mean. he's never gotten that cruel before though.
꩜pairing: carlos sainz x fem! fiancé reader
꩜a/n: kinda toxic relationship but like not really but like also so be aware :D
You two didn’t fight. It just… wasn’t like that. You argued. Calmly. Softly. Gently. He didn’t shout. You didn’t scream. Neither of you ever walked off without having the issue resolved.
It had never been like this. Just one slip of the tongue about him not being there for the important things, like your promotion, or Laura’s graduation, or those nights when you just needed your boyfriend a bit more than the other nights. That, and the mention of your new friend, Jamie, you knew him from work. He off-handedly got you a bunch of flowers for your promotion, just doing something nice. Carlos didn’t like it. You fought him on it, telling him he shouldn’t care since he’s never here. It wasn’t meant to be as snarky as it came out, you were just frustrated, you just wanted Carlos back for yourself, not constantly working or thinking about how he himself could improve the car. Carlos was tough, sure. Tough on himself, tough on Williams, tough on James. He was the kind of tough that didn’t really disappear, even in his gentlest moments. But he wasn’t tough on you. He was softer around the edges, reining it in so you wouldn’t run away. His voice was less gruff. His eyes were less hardened. He didn’t want to give you a reason to leave him, well, more than the ones you already had.
Tonight he was angry. The kind of anger that silences a room and makes everywhere his own. The kind of anger that puts you on edge for a few days, even if it’s passed. The apartment didn’t feel big enough, didn’t feel like a shared space, it felt suffocating as you sat on the couch, Carlos shouting his head off at you, screaming that you were inconsiderate, that you were trying to make him angry, that you weren’t thinking. “So what do you want me to do, huh?” he barked, his voice loud. You were sure the neighbours were confused. “Do you think I am just going to relax this whole season?! Williams is a place for learning- for growth. I cannot grow if I’m not putting in the work!” His voice was cutting through the tension in the air. He stared at you with pleading eyes, begging for an answer.
“I’m not asking you to stop racing Carlos, I’m asking you to spend some more of your free time with me-” you held your ground. You weren't being unreasonable. You wanted your boyfriend to be your boyfriend for more than 5 minutes a day. He sighed and spun on his heels, facing the other direction, head in his hands. “I’m sorry I said what I said about the Jamie thigh-”
He spun around again, wide eyes meeting yours. “So it’s a thing now? It’s a ‘Jamie thing’ now?” he demanded. “Dios mío, Y/n he’s a co-worker, he’s not in love with you,” he scoffed and you felt yourself recoil. What did that mean? ‘He’s not in love with you’ is he insinuating he’d have no reason to be in love with me? That I’m unlovable? That there’s no way anyone else would date me? You thought to yourself, emotion building in your chest. If he noticed, he didn’t let on. “He shouldn’t be giving my girlfriend flowers-”
“It was a nice thing to do!” you argued, your voice rising to meet his, as you stood from the couch. You couldn’t take this bullshit anymore, this ridiculous disrespect when both of you knew he was in the wrong. “I got promoted! 8 people sent me flowers and none of them were my boyfriend! How do you think that makes me feel, Carlos? Do you think it makes me feel cared for? Appreciated? Like you’re proud of me? Well, it doesn’t. It makes me feel like you don’t even care that I have a life outside of being your perfect little WAG.”
He rolled his eyes, his fists clenching. “You know I wanted to do something with you in person-”
“When was that going to happen?” you spat. “Winter break? Come on Carlos, just admit you knew nothing about it until I brought the flowers home, and you only started caring then. This isn’t about Jamie, or what my promotion is, it’s about you feeling like putting our relationship on the backburner isn’t a problem. I’m not asking for flowers or dates every week. I’m asking you to take an interest in my life again, and if you feel like you can;’t do that, then I don’t really know what we’re doing here,” you shrugged, the first of a few tears falling. “I can handle myself most of the time, I just need help sometimes. I need you-”
He scoffed. “Can you handle yourself? You’re crying to me about a fucking promotion and wanting to be congratulated on it.”
He realised he crossed a line. He saw the way your face hardened. He saw how you stiffened. You crossed your arms, willing yourself not to cry. Your voice was soft and fleeting. “That’s not fair.”
“Life’s not fair.”
Then the silence. The suffocating, intoxicating, charged silence that made you want to run out of your own home and never come back. You couldn’t believe him. You knew he was stressed, but this was beyond stress. This was him being cruel. He had no right to speak to you like that. You could tell he wasn’t even listening to your side of the story and of course you hadn’t told him about the flowers because you knew how he’d react. You just didn’t think it’d be this bad. You didn’t think he’d belittle and dominish you so much. You didn’t think he’d cared so little. You turned your back on him, walking into your shared bedroom, needing time to think. You didn’t see it, but he reached out for you, but he stopped before he grabbed you, not knowing what to say.
The lock clicked into place and you finally let yourself break down, your hand flying over your mouth to stop yourself from sobbing. You tried to suck in a steadying breath, but all the air had been sucked out of your lungs back in the living room, and the weight of his words still pushed against your chest. You stared at the blue walls, your arms wrapped around yourself like it might somehow hold you together from falling apart. Your throat burned from the tears falling down your face, but you made no effort to grab the bottle of water on your bedside table, not when you knew Carlos had made it for you that morning. Fuck, how could so much change in one stupid fucking morning?
This was uncharted territory. He could be sharp, frustrating, downright rude sometimes, but he wasn’t cruel, not to you. He could fight people on track like it didn’t matter if they lived or died, but he’d always hop out of that car with a soft kiss for you. Even in the beginning of your relationship, when it consisted of heavy and wanting glances where you cautiously tiptoed around each other, to something tangible, something steady, something real- Carlos had always been there for you. Maybe not physically, but he was there. He’d always text at the right times, call just when you needed him, say the right thing, always. He was passionate, sure. Sometimes he got it wrong, but he was never cruel. He never wanted you to feel like you needed to hide from him.
You pressed your back up against the door, trying desperately to will the tears away, will that sinking feeling in your chest away, make everything alright again, forget today and all the horrible things he said. You couldn’t. You knew it wasn’t totally fair to pin all the blame on him. This fight wasn’t just about Jamie. It wasn’t just about him not giving you enough attention. It was both of you realising that if you didn’t work on it, your relationship was bound to break apart.
And that scared the shit out of you.
Carlos was protective, he always had been. But he was never possessive. He didn’t ask you to change. He didn’t ask you to not have guy friends. He didn’t feel intimidated by your male co-workers. Then Jamie rolled up with his bouquet of your favourite flowers, and he felt threatened. Then he panicked that he felt threatened, and he took it out on you. At first it was sweet, quiet mumbled in Spanish about how he shouldn’t be doing that knowing you have a boyfriend at home. Somewhere between then and now, it turned into a screaming match where Carlos insulted your very being.
You let out a shaky breath, your mind rushing at a thousand miles an hour. The diamond ring on your finger weighed down your hand. You felt it more than you ever had before. Every negative thought your brain could muster brought itself to the surface as you looked over it. He gave it to you just to shut you up. He hates you. He doesn’t love you. He doesn’t care that you’re pulling away. He doesn’t care about you. You groaned, pouting as you looked at it. It was so beautiful. A proposal down by the harbour. Private. Small. Gentle. Carlos in front of you, tears in his eyes, asking you to choose him, because he already chose you. You sighed.
Ding!
Your calendar app sent you a notification.
Carlos and Y/n’s Engagement Celebration Dinner!
You scoffed at your phone, wiping your eyes. Worst timing ever.
Meanwhile, Carlos stood in the living room, going over every horrible thing he’d said. He ran his hands through his hair repeatedly, something he did when he needed to think- or when he was pissed off. He knew you were upset, it didn’t take a rocket scientist to notice the way your eyes welled up with tears when he said what he did. He also knew his reaction was totally out of line, he was pushing you too hard without having a real reason, and the guilt of that settled in his stomach like an ulcer he couldn’t get rid of. This was the first time he’d directed everything at you. He was wrong, he knew that. But that anger persisted, burning in his chest like a fire that just wouldn't go out. He wasn’t angry with you, he was mad at the situation. Hell, he wasn’t even mad at the situation- he was fucking terrified he was on the brink of losing you. He was more terrified that that argument might’ve been the last nail in the coffin.
He ran a hand through his hair again, scoffing out a heavy sigh as he walked out to the balcony, dropping down onto the chair he’d sat not 8 hours ago, having breakfast with you. He kept replaying it, over and over again, like a corner he couldn’t get quiet right, or a chicane he’d fucked up one too many times. His words were sharp. Cutting. Cruel.
He contemplated trying to talk to you again. Trying to apologise, admit he was scared of losing you. But even he knew you needed space. His jaw and fists clenched as he stayed put on the balcony, watching over the roads he knew so well, wishing he’d done so many things differently.
Ding!
He opened his phone as fast as he could, hoping it was a message from you. It wasn’t.
Carlos and Y/n’s Engagement Celebration Dinner!
Fuck’s sake. He swiped a hand over his face and groaned. Of course he picked a fight on the one day you two needed to be a happy couple.
You stepped out of the bedroom wearing a long white dress, something simple and plain. Just silk. Your hair up. A bag in hand.
You were breathtaking. He stared. He’d gone with a white linen shirt and some white trousers, not really knowing what to wear since he had assumed you would’ve guided him. You didn’t. You also didn’t look up at him. The various keys stayed on the counter, untouched. If you left it any later, you’d be late to your own reservation.
He wanted nothing more than to reach out and hold you, promise you he didn’t mean anything he said, and apologise. You sat on the bench beside the door, lacing up your heels like they’d offended you in some way. He couldn’t take his eyes off you. He didn’t want to. Your movements were sharp, jerky, and your mouth was set in a flat line. You looked up at him, your mouth opening like you had something to say. It closed again. You weren't sure if it was frustration or guilt, or anger written in his expression, but either way, it left your stomach in twists. “Which car do you want to take?” he asked, clearing his throat. He wanted this to be about you, about the way you two loved each other, about how good the good times were, even in the midst of a bad time.
“Whatever you want, Carlos,” your voice was airy, lacking of its usual conviction. He gulped. You walked out the front door without so much as a glance over your shoulder. He cringed.
The Monaco air seemed much too cold for May. Sharp, like it was taking after your argument,the universe working to remind you of just how shit you already felt. Carlos locked the door behind the two of you, and you didn’t wait up for him so that you could take his hand. He didn’t open your car door. He just sat into his own seat, hands gripping the wheel so hard they turned white. He placed the keys into the ignition without so much as a look your way. The radio switched on, filling the strained silence between the two of you.
The drive loomed over your head like a cruel punishment. You couldn’t cancel on everyone now. You couldn’t drive separately. You couldn't blow up. You just had to stay calm. That became increasingly difficult as you felt the emotions of the day overcome you, no matter how hard you tried to regulate yourself, the tears just kept burning your throat, that anxiety never left the place in your chest where it had settled over an hour ago. You focused your gaze out the window, watching as the streets of Monaco whipped by. You weren’t really paying attention to it, just trying to count and calm yourself down and your mind whizzed, focused on everything he did, and didn’t say.
He’d been louder than usual. Harsher. Crueler. His mouth worked before his brain could realise the hurt he was causing. Like he couldn’t stop it. But you knew he could’ve, if he really tried. You knew him. He had to control everything at 300 miles an hour, so he could definitely stop himself from saying the shittiest things he could think of to you.
But he didn’t. Knowing that hurt more.
The silence was deafening, growing unbearable. You just kept telling yourself you weren’t going to break, then thought about those times you promised yourself you’d never make yourself smaller for a man, all those times Carlos promised you that you’d never have to. You spared him a glance. Gone was that sweet boy who was too shy to speak to you the first time. His jaw was clenched. His eyes stayed on the road. His shoulders were hunched like he was trying to hide himself. But you saw past that. You saw the way his expression didn’t reach his eyes. The way his shoulder sagged. The way he was tired in a way he’d never admit. Drained. Emotionally drained.
You didn’t realise you were crying until the tear slipped down your face. Thank god you’d decided to pack your makeup bag just in case this very scenario occurred. You brushed it away quickly, knowing he hadn’t seen it. He couldn’t look your way. That just made your cry harder. More tears falling down, that sick feeling in your stomach, that weight on your chest, that burn in your throat.
You sniffled as you watched the countryside whip past you, hues of pinks and purples painting the sky. You pretended that small ache in your heart wasn’t a call for comfort, for reassurance, for him, but you knew it was. You wanted him to turn to you and apologise. Promise you he loved you. Promise he’d do anything to not lose you. But you didn’t want to have to be the one to reach out. You wanted him to. You wanted him to care.
Your hands were trembling in your lap. You hadn’t noticed. He did.
He pulled over the car on the side of the road, not caring that his Ferrari 812 Competizione was in the dirt on a countryside road. You barely noticed you’d stopped. “Cariño,” his voice was soft, gentle. He reached over. He held your hands like they were the most fragile thing on the planet.
You broke, tears falling. “I’m sorry,” you whispered, loud in the silence of the car. “I just miss you.”
He let out a heavy sigh, he squeezed your hands before he let them go, opening his door and rounding the front of the car. He was at your side before you could ever ask what he was doing.
“Come here,” He opened your door, the cool air rushing in as he offered a hand out to you. His tone was soft. So soft. So much softer than before. You took his hand without thinking much about it.
He pulled you into his arms. His chest was warm and solid. Grounding. He squeezed you like you’d run away if he didn’t, and maybe you would. It made you feel safer. Cared for. Like someone was there for you.
“I’m sorry Cariño,” he huffed out against your ear, you pretended not to notice the way his voice broke. “I was wrong.”
“I’m sorry too-” you tried, but he shushed you.
“You have nothing to be sorry for,” he shook his head as you let out yet another shaky breath. “I was a dick, and I was just scared of losing you. You’re just too nice to me, aren’t you?” he cooed, his thumb brushed against the side of your face as he looked down at your face. Your mascara was smudged. Tear lines down your face. He felt the splotchy heat on your chest and it pulled at his heart strings. “We’re going to be okay?”
You sighed, closing your eyes as your emotions took over again. You leaned your forehead against his chest. “What did you mean?” you whispered.
“What do you mean, my love?” he asked, a hand smoothing down your back.
“He’s just your co-worker, he’s not in love with you,” you repeated. “As if no one would ever love me?” you let out a sad chuckle. “I just want to know what you mean.”
He let out a shaky breath, internally kicking himself for saying such ridiculous things. He wanted to smack himself. “No my love,” he shook his head, your small sniffles twisting his heart strings as he tried to not let his emotion overtake his senses. “No. You’re wonderful and I was being stupid. Please don’t believe anything I said. You’re incredible. I’m so proud of you. You’re a genius. YOu deserve to be celebrated, and I’m sorry I couldn’t see that.”
You nodded against his chest. “Yeah, you are stupid,” you agreed, a sad smile on your lips. He chuckled against your hair. “We’re going to be okay?” you asked.
“I’m going to fight for you everyday,” he said it like it was a promise. An inevitable. A truth. You both felt that release of anxiety, though guilt lingered. You’d be alright. You’d fight for each other. You’d do what it takes to make it work. He pressed a kiss to your forehead, lingering for a moment. Instead of pulling back completely, his lips trailed down, brushing lightly against your temple, then your cheek. His hands circled your waist, his breath on your cheek. You sniffled again, realising how much of a mess you must look. He didn’t care. He leaned in closer and your hands tightened on his shirt as he stopped, hesitating. He was dangerously close as an unspoken ache settled between you two. He held himself back as best he could, but all he wanted was to kiss you. “Carlos,” your voice was just above a whimper, and he only leaned in closer, cradling your face with a hand as his lips found yours. He kissed you like he needed to, passionate but slow. Careful and cautious, like your first. Like he couldn’t get close enough. Like it’d never be enough, no matter how many times he kissed you. You pulled back, breathing out with a small smile on your lips. He could’ve sworn he’d gone to heaven and died when you looked up at him. “We’re going to be okay,” you spoke the words like you meant it, and he felt his stomach twist in the best way.
He smiled. “You’re something else,” he shook his head, his voice low, a depth behind his words you couldn’t name. You chuckled, your cheeks heating. You pressed one last lingering kiss to the edge of his mouth and sent him a small smile.
“We’ll be late,’ you reminded him, stepping back into the car and getting your makeup bag out to start fixing your makeup. He shook his head, chuckling as he slid into the driver’s seat. His hand found your thigh, holding tightly.
It felt like he would never let go. You didn’t want him to.
williams & merc masterlist
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Redemption— Rafe Cameron x Pogue!Reader
summary— you’re taken by Groff’s accomplices and you’re ex Rafe Cameron appears to save you unexpectedly. your past is full of pain but he’s determined to make things right.
warnings— ex to lovers, kidnapping, arguing, slight manipulation and coercion, oral(m&f receiving), fingering, choking, ass slapping, degradation, praise kink, daddy kink, unprotected sex, creampie.
︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵‿
Rafe hadn’t planned on being part of the treasure hunt again, but when he heard about the Groff connection and Sarah dragging you into it, he couldn’t stay away. It wasn’t about the money this time—though he wouldn’t say no to a cut or possibly stealing it for himself—it was about you. Despite everything, he still cared deeply, even if he didn’t show it the way you deserved.
Your relationship had ended months ago, crumbling under the weight of his issues and the way he treated your friends. You’d made it clear you didn’t want to see him again even during the trip. But when he found out you’d been kidnapped by Groff’s men, something inside him snapped. He couldn’t think straight until he had you back.
When he first showed up to give his help, your cold glare hit harder than any insult. “You shouldn’t be here, Rafe,” you’d said flatly, refusing to meet his eyes.
He tried to explain himself, but you cut him off. “I don’t trust you, not after everything. You treated my friends like garbage, and you don’t get to come in now and play the hero.”
“I’m not here to play the hero,” he’d said, voice low, almost pleading. “I’m here for you.”
But there was no time to dwell on old wounds. Chaos erupted, and by the time the dust settled, he’d saved you from Groff’s accomplices and now you were both hiding out in a grimy motel room.
“You didn’t have to come after me, Rafe,” you snapped, pacing the cramped space. “I don’t need a knight in shining armor. Especially not from someone who ditched us when we needed him.”
His jaw clenched as he leaned against the door. “You’re seriously saying that to me? You all left me to almost get arrested! Like I was nothing.”
“You were nothing when you couldn’t pick a side!” you fired back, glaring at him.
“I did pick a side,” he shot back, stepping closer, his voice dropping. “I picked you. That’s why I’m here.”
His words hung in the air, the weight of them undeniable. You scoffed, looking away, but your resolve wavered as he moved closer.
“You think I don’t care?” His tone softened, a crack in his armor. “You think I didn’t lose my mind when I heard they took you? I couldn’t—I wouldn’t let anything happen to you.”
Your breath hitched, but you shook your head. “You have a funny way of showing it.”
Rafe’s hand caught your wrist gently, turning you to face him. His gaze burned, the anger and pain in his eyes mirrored in your own. “I’m here now,” he murmured. “Let me prove it.”
You didn’t have time to argue before his lips crashed into yours. The kiss was desperate, heated, and filled with all the unspoken emotions you’d both buried. Your fingers curled into his shirt as his hands gripped your waist, pulling you closer. The frustration and anger melted into something you couldn’t name, something that felt like it could destroy you both if you let it.
Rafe’s hands were everywhere, his lips trailing from your mouth to your neck with a desperation you hadn’t felt in months. You wanted to lose yourself in him, but the anger resurfaced, and you pushed him away, chest heaving.
“I can’t do this, Rafe. Not after how you’ve treated us—how you’ve treated me.”
His jaw clenched, but his voice was soft. “I got a ship for all of you. I stayed civil even after you tied me up. I’m here, trying to prove myself to you. I still want you. I can’t do this without you—I can’t be better without you.”
Your emotions threatened to spill over, but instead of crying or screaming, you grabbed his shirt and pulled him back. The kiss was fiery, tangled in resentment and longing, as his hands roamed your body again. His lips found your neck, and a moan escaped before you could stop it.
“You’re such a piece of shit,” you muttered, your voice shaky.
“Yeah?” His hand slid lower, brushing under the fabric of your outfit and finding your pussy. “Well, you’re wet for this piece of shit.” His voice was low, teasing, as his fingers found their way inside.
You gasped, torn between shame and pleasure. “You’re disgusting, Rafe. I can’t stand you.”
“And yet here you are, you’re a slut for liking this,” he whispered against your neck. “Hear how wet you are.”
The heat built unbearably, and you couldn’t stop yourself. As your body betrayed you, the orgasm was laced with mortification. You turned away, unable to meet his gaze, but he just smirked softly. “You can hate me all you want,” he said, his voice a murmur. “But I’m not going anywhere.”
He slipped his fingers coated in your arousal in your mouth and your tongue swirled over them.
“Good girl,” he chuckled.
“You never know when to shut up, do you?” you snapped, rolling your eyes as Rafe smirked. His hands rested confidently on your waist, pulling you closer.
“I could say the same about you,” he quipped, his voice low and teasing. Before you could retort, he dropped to his knees, silencing you with his actions.
“Don’t,” you started, but the heat of his touch made your words falter.
“Stop pretending you don’t like it,” he murmured, his eyes locked on yours, as he licked your pussy. Despite yourself, a soft moan escaped you.
“That’s what I thought,” he said smugly, and you could only glare as he gave a satisfied grin.
Rafe’s grip on your hips was firm, his strength keeping you in place despite your squirming. Your fingers tangled in his buzzed hair, tugging as whimpers slipped from your lips. His focus didn’t waver, and you felt yourself trembling under his relentless attention.
“Rafe,” you whispered, your voice breaking with a mix of defiance and surrender. But he didn’t stop until your entire body tensed, a soft moan escaping as you reached your peak. He looked up at you afterward, his expression smug and victorious.
Rafe leaned back, a smug grin on his face as he palmed his cock through his pants, clearly enjoying the effect he had on you. “Look how hard you got me, baby,” he said, his voice low and confident. His hand moved slowly, emphasizing his words. “You used to always help me out with this, come on, suck daddy’s cock.”
The nickname made you wince, memories stirring. He saw the hesitation but leaned in closer, voice softer but insistent. “You know you want to,” he murmured, his gaze challenging, daring you to resist.
Rafe pulled his hard cock out, his size drawing a breathless reaction from you, it looked like he’d gotten bigger, if that was even possible. He chuckled, the sound dripping with arrogance. “Come on, baby. Help daddy out,” he coaxed, his tone a mix of command and temptation. Despite your resolve, you felt yourself falter, unable to resist the magnetic pull he always had on you.
Arching your back, your ass high in the air, you leaned down, taking him into your mouth. His groan was instant, his hand finding your waist before he smacked your ass. “That’s my good girl,” he muttered. You rolled your eyes and took him into your warm mouth, bobbing your head at the right pace to have him moaning. You used your hand to stroke what couldn’t fit in your mouth as his balls tightened and his breathing grew ragged. Just as he was about to release, you pulled away.
His laugh was one of disbelief. “You’re such a brat,” he muttered, shaking his head, though the amusement never left his eyes.
Rafe’s warm hands moved to your bare thighs, rubbing it slowly as he looked up at you with those blue eyes. He knew it was your weakness. You were already soaked but having him caress you like that practically turned you into a fountain. He had you right where he wanted you.
“My cock really misses that tight, wet pussy,” he whispered, his voice low and husky.
“Yeah? Well if you want to fuck me, you’re gonna have to beg,” you retorted.
Rafe let out a mocking chuckle, as if he couldn’t believe those words left your lips. His little baby wasn’t such a baby anymore.
“Seems like we’ve been apart for so long that you’ve forgotten, Rafe Cameron doesn’t fucking beg.”
He snaked his hand around your neck, pulling you into a heated, rough kiss. Your tongues slipped into each other’s mouth, the feeling one that made you melt. He pushed you onto the bed by your neck and took his position above you.
“You’ve also forgotten that this is my pussy and I saved you, I’ve fucking earned it,” he said, with that cocky smirk plastered on his face.
Everyone had their weakness, for Sarah it was John B, for Pope it was Cleo and for you— well, it was Rafe Cameron.
You spread your legs and he smirked, resisting to make a snarky comment as he dragged the head of his cock up and down your wet folds. He placed it on your clit, teasing you as you squirmed underneath him.
“Please,” you whimpered, wanting nothing more than to have him plunge his cock inside you,
“Look who’s begging now,” he said, darkly.
He lifted your legs around his waist and you locked them as he sank into your pussy. His hips bucked and his pace faltered as he had to slowly push in and wait for you to adjust to his size.
“So tight f’me, glad no one’s been inside this pussy since we broke up.”
You gave him a slight push on the chest but your attack was halted as he thrusted into you all the way. Your jaw fell slack as you gasped for air feeling him fill you to the brim.
“S’okay baby, just breathe, daddy’s here,” he cooed, leaning down to kiss your lips.
He began rutting steadily inside you, whispering little praises that made your stomach flip. You wouldn’t admit it but a part of you missed having him above you like this. By now he had taken off his shirt, revealing the muscle underneath and the sweat glistening on his body. You ground against him, your clit getting the stimulation you desperately craved and sending pleasure through you.
“Oh God, daddy,” you moaned, meeting his thrusts faster.
“You gonna cum baby? That’s it, cum for me,” he murmured.
Rafe’s pace sped up, hitting the sweet spot inside you as your release hit you like a truck. He continued fucking you through your orgasm, your legs shaking as he did, the pleasure almost too much.
“Good girl, there she is,” he cooed, “I knew you wanted this too.”
“M-more,” you managed to croak out.
“Oh my baby wants more? You want daddy to fuck you even more? What a dirty little slut.”
He complied with your request, flipping you swiftly onto your stomach and pulling your hips up to him. You arched your back the way you knew he liked it and he kissed your ass before rubbing his cock along your folds.
“God baby, did I mention how much I missed this wet pussy?”
He slammed into you from behind, gripping your waist as he brought you back onto his cock, hard. Your ass clapped against him and he watched mesmerized as his cock disappeared inside you and came out covered in your cream and juices.
“Daddy,” you moaned, shamelessly as he rolled his hips into you. You couldn’t hold back anymore. You couldn’t see his face but you knew he had on that smug look and you gasped as he pressed your face into the pillow, pounding into you at a deeper angle.
“You really like that huh, fuck, your pussy is just gripping my cock so well baby, cum for daddy, cream all over my cock.”
He slapped your ass, basically giving you the go ahead as you shuddered under his touch, his name leaving your lips continuously as you creamed all over his cock. Unable to stop himself, he stilled inside you, his load spurting as he moaned your name and you felt his dick throb against your walls.
He rolled over, pulling out of you but not before spreading your ass to watch his cum drip out.
You stared up at the ceiling, wondering what you were doing with your life. You were in a random motel in Morocco and you hooked up with your ex after he saved you from kidnappers, meanwhile your friends were probably out looking for you, worried sick.
“Uh, we should go, they’re probably looking for me,” you sighed, getting up. He took a piece of cloth and wiped between your legs. Silence fell between you but oddly, it was a comfortable silence. You looked into his eyes and saw nothing but care and sincerity. He really did come for you and was actually trying to change and do right by you all.
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legitimacy


summary: “Vaemond Velaryon’s petition holds no sense,” it is said that the Wandering Princess reiterated once she heard of her uncle’s accusations. “My late father always recognised my brothers as his trueborn sons. Whether they look like him or the Baratheon and Arryn side of the family does not matter: they are legitimate.”
pairings: cregan stark x velaryon!reader (no use of y/n), platonic (familial) relationship between the targs/velaryon and reader
word count: 4.5k
warnings: mentions of killing off someone🥰, reader is pro-blackwood, reader has some kind of anger issues, oscar is my babygirl and my babygirl only, language as always
author's note: an update of the heir and the wolf? in this economy? also pls don't comment about tagging, click here and join the taglist so that it's easier for me to tag everyone
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You’re sure you are going to kill every man and woman in the Riverlands till only their fantastic wine — without which you wouldn’t have made it this far — and vineyards remain, so that you can drink in peace without dealing with… the consequences.
Lord Bracken has been sprouting nothing but insults and curses towards the Blackwood family for what feels like the last three hours. He surely hasn’t talked without being interjected, as Alysanne Blackwood has been responding to all his insults with doubled hate.
You stare over at Oscar, sitting beside you, with an unamused expression. “Once we get out of here, I’ll make sure to break your legs in half as punishment for having me subjected to this torture,” you hiss, hand clenching around your goblet. He shrugs. “Didn’t you say to ask you if I ever needed anything? I needed help just this once, or else I would’ve cut my ears two hours ago.”
Of course Lord Tully had to fall ill when there were matters to resolve, leaving his eldest grandson in charge. You wish Kermit was born first, so that you wouldn't have to sit here and hear all of these people complain.
You huff. “Better your ears than my sanity.”
The thing that worries you the most is the fact that they seem to have no intention of stopping yet — and they’ve been going on for ages, accusing each other of heinous crimes committed by their ancestors or something. You’re not quite sure about that, as you’ve stopped listening to their rants about ten minutes in.
You glance at the servant standing by the door of the council chamber, who’s about to turn the hourglass for the fifth time now. When he does, it’ll officially be two hours and a half into them talking about their centuries-long feud. You have to do something, or else you’ll go mad.
You cough loudly, and the two sides of the discussion shut up, looking at you. The table is rectangular and long, wide enough so that nobody can smack the person in front of them with ease. You sit at the end of it, a map of the Riverlands in front of you, Oscar sat to your right. “So,” you start, “have you all got it out of your systems? Can we start now?”
Both sides look at you puzzled, and for a moment you fear they might go back to screaming, but they don’t. “Lord Samwell, Lord Amos, could you both raise your hands for me? I forgot your faces when you started screaming because I thought I was back in Dragonstone with my younger brothers having a tantrum about a toy — they are six and three, by the way.”
Red-faced, both lords raise their hands; Lord Amos is a bit older than Lord Samwell, his face sickly and hair grey, a high contrast to the Blackwood's dark brown hair and plump face. “Good. Now I would like you two to choose a spokesperson that will talk in your places.”
Lord Samwell raises an eyebrow, “Pardon me?” he says, as Lord Amos raises from his seat. “This is an outrage! Why should we choose someone else to talk in our place? We can definitely settle this matter once for all alone!”
You raise an eyebrow at his antics, motioning over a guard to make him stand back down. “Well, if you could settle this matter alone I wouldn’t be there, would I?” you ask him with a short laugh. “Besides– don’t you still have the scar Lord Samwell kindly gifted you back in the days where my mother was looking for a husband? I don’t want the two of you to settle your matters alone if it means someone being stabbed again.”
“We would be perfectly capable of doing it now–”
“Choose a spokesperson or don’t speak, Lord Amos, as you have already talked enough for my likings. The choice is all yours.”
The guard now stands behind him, hand on the pommel of his sword, and the lord begrudgingly sits back down. “I shall name my uncle, Ser Lothar,” Ser Lothar is an old man with white hair and no beard, who looks like he’s seen the rise and fall of all the Gods in the world and death herself.
You don’t say anything, even if you’d like someone who doesn’t look like he’s a night away from dying. “Lord Samwell?”
“My sister, Lady Alysanne,” is his resolute response. Ah, the lady who was screaming at Lord Amos earlier. She's young and thin — no doubt close to your age — with black hair to match a raven's feathers.
“Rubbish!” is Ser Lothar's not-so-smart response. You notice now that he’s missing three teeth and speaks horrendously — as if their accent already isn’t helping. “How old is she? Seven and ten? She should be in the birthing bed, not in this council chamber!”
Everyone stares at him, bewildered — even his own kind. Maybe if you weren’t there, the comment would’ve been overlooked, but seeing as the council was being literally held by a six and ten year old girl, it wasn’t the smartest comment he could’ve made. You can feel from your seat the murderous intent that comes from the Blackwoods — thankfully you made everyone leave their weaponry outside. You just hope nobody has a hidden knife somewhere in their breeches.
“For your information, Ser Lothar,” you speak up before things can escalate, “I am six and ten and perfectly able to run a council on my own. I’m sure Lady Alysanne will manage just fine.”
He squints his eyes at you, like he’s just noticed your presence. “I will be listening to no cunt!”
You blink at Lord Amos, who’s red in the face, as calm as ever. “Would you like to change your mind, Lord Bracken? I’m afraid Ser Lothar will be too preoccupied with being my dragon’s breakfast to be here with us as we discuss this serious matter.”
Lothar screams obscenities as the guards take him away to the courtyard, where Nādrēsy is staying for the time being, and Lord Samwell has a smug look on his face — no wonder happy that his sister has had justice. “Lyle!” Lord Amos roars, making a boy no older than twenty jump from his seat. “Y– yes, my lord!”
You intertwine your fingers in front of you. “Good. Now that the table has been cleaned we can actually start.” you ask them to take the seat of their lords, so that they’re near you and you three can talk more clearly. “I want to make sure that it is clear that I don’t expect your houses to be friends after this council. My only purpose is to end the brotherly blood shedding that in the last centuries has exasperated the Riverlands to the point that Ser Oscar Tully here had to ask for the Crown’s help to put an end to it. I just want your houses to stand each other.”
You sigh, pointing to the map with their territories traced out in front of you; you push it towards them so that they have some reference. “This was the outline of the territories that King Jaheaerys’s ambassador drew the last time there was a council like this. Peace lasted only for about two years — my goal is to make it last at least twenty, so that when the Lords die their heirs are of age.” you darkly jest. Lord Samwell sends a glare to Lord Amos: he was six when his father was killed in a Bracken ambush.
“Obviously, it is not. My goal is to make it last. So, I would like you two to outline the territories that are most important to your houses that as of now are owned by the other. Then we’ll see what we can do about it — see if we can make it a fair exchange to avoid spilling more blood.”
The two nod and immediately get to work. You are surprised to see that they do not speak to each other — not even a little nag or tease. They seem to be more mature than their elders, a thing that strangely you do not find weird at all.
You didn’t expect for it to be an easy negotiation, but Seven Hells if you had underestimated it. They would be competing for the entire Riverlands if there weren’t any other houses, you’re sure about that. And before you know it, it’s been a sennight and you’re still staying in Riverrun, hoping that some god takes pity on you and strikes you down. Sure, you had them choose their spokesperson, but that doesn’t mean the others don’t protest when you say something they don’t like.
“I’m thinking about arranging a marriage,” you say to Oscar one evening.
You’re in the guest chambers, the ones you’re staying in. The chess match in front of you is basically forgotten, replaced by a discussion about peace treaties and ways to stop feuds. Your friend snorts, taking another sip of his wine. “My ancestors have tried before. It always ends up in a massacre before the bride can even receive the groom's cloak.”
You shake your head. “I’m thinking about Olyver Bracken and Alysanne Blackwood.”
He raises an eyebrow, skeptical. “A drunkard and a hunter? Weird choice. Don’t know if I feel like ruining a lady’s promising future.”
“Think about it.” you lean over, elbows on your knees. You take two pawns, placing them on the table. “He is Lord Amos’ heir, and he is useless. Meanwhile, she would be able to run Stone Hedge like it was the fucking Night Watch. We could make them marry, then maybe right after she already gave birth to a boy, an heir… a terrible accident could happen.” you knock down one of the pawns, “A tragic fall from the horse, a bad fever… you name it. And suddenly Lady Bracken is free from her preposterous husband and can raise his heir however she wants.”
You take two other pawns and place them near the others. “Then we marry small Benjicot Blackwood off to Cressida Bracken. They are still young, younger than Olyver and Alysanne; if Cressida is sent to live with the Blackwoods as soon as the engagement is announced, she may not feel the same hate towards him as any other Bracken would.”
You sigh, rubbing your hands together. “Give it twenty years, and the heirs to the Blackwood and the Bracken territories will all be cousins. What kind of cousins would ever start a war against each other?”
Oscar blinks at you. You blink back. “I mean what kind of cousins that aren’t in my family, Oscar.”
“Oooh. Oh, yes, that makes sense now.” he tilts his head to the side, looking at the pawns. “You plan on killing the Bracken guy?”
You shrug. “Only if Alysanne finds him annoying. I would never force the poor girl to stand him, knowing I wouldn’t even be able to wait to have an heir before I got tired of him, so if she manages to do it, I will gift her a new set of arrows and a bow. Closing an eye on his mysterious disappearance would be the least I could do, if the rumours about him are true.”
Hearsays say that he’s insufferable and that he spends more time in brothels than in his own bed, but ultimately he’s pretty defenseless and has gotten his ass beaten in pubs more times than his father is able to count. Oscar snorts, “Let’s see if there’s no carnage during the wedding, then we can actually talk about it.”
The next day comes, and you dread the moment you’ll be sat at that fucking council table again, and will have to announce not only one but two betrothals. It’s for the best, at least, or that’s what you tell yourself when Alysanne Blackwood looks at you like you just sentenced her to death. The whole table protests against your decision, but you’re unremovable, and you’re telling them beforehand just because you feel nice today. Your mother would’ve probably arranged the marriage without telling anyone anything until the day of the wedding.
“You can’t just do that!” Samwell laments, red from anger. It seems he doesn’t like the thought of his sister being married off — quite thankfully, honestly. You’re happy that you’re not the only sister who has brothers who care about her.
“The thing is, Lord Blackwood,” you reply, “that I can and I will. As ambassador to the King my word is his, and I’m sure he would agree with me in this decision. You lot have killed enough men, women and children in this feud of yours; the whole RIverlands are tired, as honestly am I, of hearing of your endless feud and your constant blood spilling. I say we put an end to it.”
They don’t seem to care; they yell at you, then at each other, spitting venom and curses, talking over each other so loudly that you don’t understand anything. You clench your hands, rage rising inside you; you wish you could just make Nādrēsy burn their beloved castles down to the ground and call it a day, so that there aren’t any more territories to fight about, but unfortunately it isn't exactly diplomatic. Is this how your grandsire feels when he holds court?
You stare at the map in front of you; the distribution of the lands has changed, even if the number of acres both families own has basically remained the same. You have either split the territories in question or gave one to the Brackens and another to the Blackwoods, trying to be as fair and equal as you could be — but of course none of them would be happy; they both wanted the other’s whole territory.
You feel like you’re looking after all your little brothers who can’t agree for the life of them. Aegon will say that a toy is his and Viserys will reply that it’s actually his, even though they both have no idea where that toy came from in the first place nor that it was actually yours a decade ago.
“Children!” you shout over the voices of the lords, shutting them up real quick. “You are behaving like children — except you are grown men! And I am disgusted by you all! Your families have been in these lands for centuries, and not only have you never managed to overthrow one another, but you also have to make it everyone’s problem! Aren’t you ashamed? Don’t you have just a bit of remorse for all the suffering your hatred is causing? How many men, women and children have to die before you–”
The door bursts open, a servant barging in, “Princess–!”
“What?” you yell, enraged, turning to look at him. He cowers, trying to make himself as small as he can, knees trembling under your furious gaze. “I… I–”
“Talk before I cut your tongue out and let her talk for you,” you spit. You would never do that, of course, it’s just that you have found in the last few years that a threat here and a threat there get the job done far more quicker and easier.
The servant gulps. “A raven from King’s Landing,” he squeaks, “It’s from Princess Rhaenyra Targaryen.” He hands you the letter and opts to run as fast as he can, away from you, shutting the doors of the chamber behind him.
You look at the letter, confused, only to rip it open and read it. The men at the table watch you intently, hoping that it’s some kind of good news so that your mood lightens up — maybe the princess is pregnant again? Maybe Prince Joffrey has managed to mount his dragon for the first time?
All their hopes are crushed when they see you get redder and redder in the face from anger as you read; if your dragon happened to be in the same room, they are sure that the paper would be burned down to ashes. Oscar leans to your side, peeking at the letter and reading what he can, frowning once he understands what your mother has written. “Wha–”
“A petition!” you roar, outraged. “And they didn’t cut his tongue when he started talking about it!”
“Madness,” Oscar sighs, “pure madness.”
You tear the paper into pieces, making the lords flinch. “The council is dismissed,” you declare. “The terms of the negotiations remain the same; Lord Tully will make sure that you all agree and the deal will be sealed tomorrow. Or else,” you lean down, placing your hands on the table, “I’ll come back once my matters are settled in King’s Landing and make sure that you all agree, in one way or another.” The threat is subtle, but they all understand that if they refuse to bend to the treaty, you’ll visit them in their beloved lands — with your very hungry dragon, surely.
As the lords start to leave the room, you look over at Oscar, “You’re coming to King’s Landing with me.”
He blinks, “I am?”
You snort, unamused. “You are. Vaemond Velaryon’s petition holds no sense, as my late father always recognised my brothers as his trueborn sons. Whether they look like him or the Baratheon and Arryn side of the family does not matter: they are legitimate. I’ll need you to keep me sane during the whole ordeal, Oscar. My ears did not bleed without a price during the last sennight.”
“But I’ve had no time to prepare– gods, let me fetch the servants, they need to start preparing my bags–”
“Tell them to bring your finest dresses and gowns,” you grunt, “wouldn’t want you to make a bad impression to the whole court, my dear Lady Oscar. Where else will you go to search for a husband otherwise?”
You shake your head right after, not in the mood to jest, “Be fucking serious, Oscar; bring a change or two and let it be done. We’re not going to King’s Landing to have fun, it’s a trial.” your expression is dark, stare truce. “And a death sentence, if we’re lucky.”
Your mother will never make it out of the trial unscathed is the green wench sits or her father sit on the throne; she needs you. She made that very clear in the letter, and you have no intention in turning your back on her.
Oscar departs immediately, calling for the servants and his brother Kermit, and you follow right after, not surprised to find Lady Alysanne Blackwood out of the room, waiting for you. Even if she was half as smart and hard headed as you thought her to be, she’d probably still be waiting out the council room to talk to you about the half-wit she would marry per your orders. Poor girl.
“If you wish to talk, we can do so as we head to my rooms,” you say before she can open her mouth, “I have matters in the King's Landing to tend to, and I can’t afford to waste time.”
She grimaces, “Didn’t you come here to attend this council? Weren’t you here to help our families?”
“First of all, I was ambushed by Ser Oscar,” you clarify, “Second, yes, I was. And I did.”
She looks downright haunted. “You are a woman,” she murmurs. “You are a woman and you have sold me as no man had ever dared to do before.”
“You were bound to be sold off, Lady Alysanne,” you reply, tone calm. You can imagine her rage right now, but she must know that with her place in her family, she could have never possibly found the freedom she surely wants. You understand that by not living in the Crownlands, she had more hope for her future, with the freedom she was clearly given growing up; but you have grown in the Crownlands, and you have seen younger girls being married off to worser men without being able to escape. “I just did the honors.”
“I will slash my neck open before that brute can even think of touching me,” she boldly says.
It makes you stop to take a better look at her. She’s tall, taller than you, and a tad bit older. It’s kind of sad to see her with tears in her eyes. “I know what an unhappy marriage is,” you inform her. “In the Keep we’re full of them. My own mother was in one with my father.”
You lower your voice, leaning your head, “But you have me on your side. And I wouldn’t be against… a little violence.” at her confusion, you explain yourself. “I wouldn’t refuse to turn a blind eye to a hunting accident, let’s say.” At her joyous face, you relent, “Not on the night of the wedding, Alysanne! At least we need one heir, or the feud will never end. Lord Bracken is old and sick, and it’ll be a year or two before he dies, hopefully — I'll see if I can help the process go faster. Then his son might accidentally die, too, oh, he was so young, leaving his pain struck wife and son behind,”
She snorts, “A tragedy, wouldn’t it be?”
You laugh grimly. “Ohh, you get it.”
“What’s this smell?” Oscar yells over your shoulder, trying to make himself heard over the sound of the wind and the flapping wings of your dragon.
“That’s the capital for you!” you reply, already missing the fresh air of the RIverlands. “The weather doesn’t help Flea Bottom’s odour. It’s been like this since forever.”
He gags, “Don’t understand how you manage. Smells like piss.”
You shrug, “You get used to it. Trust me, there’s lords in court who smell far worse than Flea Bottom does,”
Nādrēsy roars unhappily: a full day of travel and it’s only to get back into the dirty streets of King’s Landing. You lightly slap his side, yelling over his laments, “Ilagon, valītsos!” Down, boy!
Oscar, behind you, shakes like a leaf as your dragon replies by roaring with vigor — no doubt, that equals to at least ten curses in dragon’s language. “How can you talk to him like that? He’s going to eat you alive one of these days and you won’t be able to do anything about it.”
You snort. “I’d like to see him try.”
The Dragon Pit is more animated than usual: some Keepers are holding back Vermax, who screeches and spits fire, while others bring Syrax back in her cave, her belly swollen, her step slow and cautious. Caraxes follows right behind, shaking his wings to throw the dirt off of them.
The Keepers greet you and your dragon, sending a weird glance towards Oscar. One of them — Kilya is her name, you believe — comes near, shouting so that you can hear her. “Īlin umbagon syt ao, dārilaros.” she says, “Aōha muña gīmēdegon īlva hen aōha māzigon.” We were waiting for you, Princess. Your mother warned us of your arrival.
You nod; you had no time to reply to her raven, but she must’ve guessed that there was no way you wouldn’t have come. “Se eman māstan.” And I have arrived, “Gūrogon Nādrēsy naejot zȳhon ripo, eman gaomon naejot imāzigon.” Bring Nādrēsy to his cave, I have matters to attend.
You help Oscar get off; he yelps as the chains around his ankles are unfastened and yells as you help him down, where the Keepers promptly catch him before he falls on his backside. You jump off your dragon’s back, landing perfectly fine, and opt to pat roughly Nādrēsy’s back, just as he likes it. “Sȳz sōvegon, valītsos.” Good fly, boy. He roars back happily.
“I’ll never understand that language,” Oscar mutters, standing back up straight, a frown upon his face. “It’s like you don’t want your secrets to be known. Why won’t you teach me High Valyrian?”
“Iksis ziry doru-borto?” the Keeper asks. Is he stupid? You shake your head, then think about it and snort, relenting. “Mērī mirrī.” Only a little.
Your friend pouts, sticking out his tongue at you. “Is that what I get for being your bestest companion?”
You laugh, walking off the Pit and to the entrance, where a carriage is promptly and not surprisingly waiting for you. “My bestest companion? Didn’t know you had wings and were named Nādrēsy.”
He gasps, dramatically grasping his chest, “You wound me!”
You both get in the carriage, and you look at him seriously. “Before we enter the Red Keep, there are some rules you must abide by.”
He raises an eyebrow, “Rules? I was raised well, you know, I shouldn’t need those. I hope the King knows that.”
You shake your head, “No, those are my rules for you. Let’s say that it’s what you’ll need if you want to go back home unscathed from the Keep’s snakes.”
Oscar gulps, “Go on.”
“First, don’t talk to the Queen. Then don’t talk to her sons unless I’m in the room. Avoid Larys Strong — he’s the guy with the crippled leg and the corpse face, you’ll know it’s him instantly — and avoid the councilmen.”
“What, you want to keep me a secret?” he asks, bewildered. “Is there someone I’ll be able to talk to? Is there a reason why I have to avoid all these people?” he gasps, “Am I your whore? Is that why you want to keep my mouth shut?”
“If you were my whore, I’m pretty sure I would want your mouth wide open and working,” you mutter, “but no, that is not why. Truth is I would rather make sure that you stay out of their claws; it’s better to keep away from their schemes.”
The actual truth is that you don’t want them to speculate something about history repeating — your mother was already rumored to have a lover from the Riverlands; the last thing this family needs is another princess said to have an affair with yet another lover from the Riverlands. They would wonder if it actually was some kind of preference that was passed down from mother to daughter, and even if the only thought of being attracted to Oscar makes you laugh, you’re sure the councilmen definitely wouldn’t be amused by it.
“Besides, you can talk to Mushroom,” you add.
“Who’s Mushroom?”
“The court’s jester. He’s insufferable, small and will try to steal your gold, but you can talk to him.”
Your friend grimaces, “Why do you keep him in the castle if he steals the lords��� gold?”
You shrug, “He makes me laugh.”
Slowly, the carriage rattles to a halt, a page opening the door for you. “Ready to see the Red Keep for the first time?”
He nods, “Ready to face your evil step-grandmother?”
#cregan stark#cregan x reader#hotd x reader#house of the dragon x reader#pizzapottah's writing#hotd x you#cregan stark fanfic#rhaenyra targaryen x reader#mother! rhaenyra targaryen x reader#cregan stark x reader#cregan stark imagine#cregan stark x you#jacaerys velaryon#aemond targaryen x reader#aegon ii targaryen#helaena targaryen#hotd#house of the dragon#lucerys velaryon#joffrey velaryon#daemon targaryen#laenor velaryon#hotd fanfic#cregan stark fanfiction
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My Love, let me go
Pairing: Kim Taehyung x Reader (Idol AU)
Summary: Breaking up with him during his military service was, initially, a good idea...until you found out that someone like him just wouldn't let go. (One shot)
Warnings: Yandere behavior, Obsessiveness, Possessiveness, Manipulative behavior, , If you’re not 18+ please, PLEASE, do not interact. Be mindful of the warnings. Let me know if I miss anything.
A/N: An effect of my brainrot (also have u see taehyung??? That in itself is an explanation enough) ✨

While the whole country and perhaps, even the whole world, waited in anticipation for June 10, 2025, you gnawed your lips in worry.
While the entire country screamed purple with his face splattered everywhere you looked, your heart was beating with anxiety for his return.
While people have been swarming in the country for his comeback, you wanted nothing but to leave.
If you could, you would have escaped the country by now. In fact, it was not from the lack of trying. You had planned months ahead; your luggage and plane tickets were all ready to go. Your leave was already planned in your work. Your itinerary for the whole month away from South Korea was planned, budget executed down to the single won. You were ready.
You knew you were ready.
However, what you failed to account was him.
You should have known, though, that you couldn’t outplan a manipulator such as Kim Taehyung.
Everything that could go wrong that day did go wrong.
First, your airline emailed you with an apology—your flight had been rescheduled to next week due to a sudden technical issue. You clenched your jaw, told yourself it was fine. You’d just leave the city instead. Maybe escape to the countryside.
So you booked a train ticket.
Your card got declined.
You blinked at the error message in disbelief. Moments later, your bank sent you a polite notification informing you that due to a “suspicious transaction,” your card had been frozen pending a thorough investigation.
Fine. You’d drive, then.
Except, of course, your car wouldn't start.
You stared at the motionless vehicle in your driveway, a bitter laugh escaping your lips.
Perfect.
Kim Taehyung: 1. You: 0.
And he hadn’t even arrived yet.
You didn’t have access to your money. You couldn’t use your car. You couldn’t even go to the place you already paid for. You were sadly, for all intents purposes, helpless and stuck.
The freedom you felt since he enlisted was slipping through your fingers by second, the weakened hold he had on you that you fought so desperately to loosen was starting to tighten again. You could feel it in your chest, your throat closing up like it always did when you sensed him near.
He hadn’t done anything directly yet…and the last time you spoke to him was when you went to visit him in his camp to end things. It had taken everything in you to face him, to stand in front of that beautiful, dangerous man and tell him you were walking away. It had taken too much of you to look into his dark and beautiful eyes to tell him that you and him were over.
But even now, you wondered—was it really courage? Or just convenience?
Because the truth was, you waited. You waited until he was safely behind gates and schedules, too far away to reach you, too confined by uniform and duty to chase after you and tear your resolve to pieces like he always did.
You ended things when you knew he couldn’t stop you.
And somehow, that made it worse. Because if there’s one thing you knew about Kim Taehyung, it’s that he never lost. Not really.
Worst of all, he never intended to lose you.
You had stood there, heart pounding, words trembling out of your mouth like fragile glass, fully expecting a reaction. Anger, disbelief, maybe even pain.
But he laughed.
He laughed like you had just told the most ridiculous joke in the world.
Head thrown back, shoulders shaking, lips stretched in that maddeningly beautiful smirk—he laughed so hard that soldiers and officers turned to stare. He laughed for too long until he uttered the words that still haunted you to this day.
Love, we will never be over.
You walked away that day, blocked his number, changed your address and never looked back.
Well, until now.
But that had been more than a year ago, you told yourself. A whole enlistment cycle. A whole lifetime, almost. He was a superstar—the superstar. There was no way he was still holding onto that, right?
Right?
And yet, deep down, under the logic and self-reassurance, under the layers of “he’s moved on” and “you’re safe now,” a familiar chill coiled in your spine.
Because if there was one thing you’d learned from loving him—it was that Kim Taehyung never forgot.
Looking back, there was no way for you to know that someone so well-loved by the public like him could be so…ruthless. So possessive. So traditional.
There was no way you could have known. The world adored him. He was beloved—a walking contradiction of mystery and warmth, always poised with that elegant ease, always smiling like the world had never bruised him. With his slow, thoughtful words and strange little quirks, Taehyung disarmed everyone, and you were no exception.
If only you weren’t swayed by his charming smile, or of how strange he was in the most beautiful way, then maybe you wouldn’t be hiding right now. Yes, you were terrified of him, but it wasn’t because you thought he would physically hurt you.
No.
You were scared of him because of how intense he loved you.
He loved you too deeply that there was no way it would ever be normal. He loved you too deeply that there was no more room for you in the us that he imagined.
Back then, he wanted to know everything—every detail of your day. What you ate. What time you slept. Whether your coworker was a man or woman. And when knowing wasn't enough, he wanted control. Where you went. Who you were with. Why you didn’t text back fast enough. Why your voice sounded tired. Why you were smiling in a photo someone else took.
At first, you made excuses. You called it passion. You called it longing. You rationalized that someone as big as he was basically could not have a simple relationship. That someone like Taehyung, someone so famous and busy, was just desperate to hold on to something real. That you were that something.
But even when you saw him almost every weekend, despite both of your demanding jobs, it was never enough. He was never satisfied with moments. He wanted all of you. He wanted to consume you. He wanted control.
Where you went. Who you were with. Why you didn’t text back fast enough. Why your voice sounded tired. Why you posted that story without tagging him. Why you looked so happy in someone else’s photo.
He said it was because he missed you. Because loving you from a distance was unbearable.
And you believed him.
He wanted you by his side, always— Wanted you on every tour, in every city, behind every curtain.
He wanted to be the only person you needed. And every night, he wanted to consume you—body, mind, time, and soul.
He asked you to quit your job so you could always be with him.
Said it so calmly, like it was the most natural thing in the world. Because, as he told you, he was the man. He should be taking care of you. His woman should not have to lift a finger to live. “Whatever you want,” he said, “it’s yours.”
But you never wanted to give up your independence. He never understood that despite the endless explanations you gave him.
You had seen what that looked like. You saw how dependent your mother was to your father, and you didn’t want that from you. You never wanted to ask a man for anything.
Taehyung quite literally hated how you couldn’t be with him in each tour or how you couldn’t live with him. In turn, you hated how he couldn’t just let go. You hated how he could not accept that you needed to be independent despite loving him.
You were too tired of it all that at one point, you told him that it was best for you two to see other people. And he just stared at you, eyes dark and wide with disbelief. Then he laughed. Not loud, not cruel. Quiet. Frightening, to which he answered why you needed anyone when you had him.
He said that maybe it was best to remove those people from your life.
Perhaps, asking him to breakup was the wrong thing to say.
Back then, you thought that that was the end, that you signifying your discontent with the relationship would mean it was over between the two of you.
You should have known that there was no leaving Taehyung.
If he couldn’t control you, he would control the situation. He was good at it, you surmised, shaping how other people see him.
He was good at playing the victim.
He was good at manipulating people into thinking that his love was normal and that he couldn’t live without you. He played it too well that you even villainized yourself when he got hospitalized.
They said he collapsed. Said he hadn’t eaten. Said he had broken down.
Fans were worried, news of his health took the social media in storm.
Park Jimin had shown up at your door, eyes bloodshot, jaw clenched so tightly it looked painful. He shoved past you without asking and stood in your living room like he owned the place.
“I didn’t know you were like this,” he said bitterly. “He only ever loved you. And what did you do?”
“You left him.” His voice shook. “How can you be so cruel?”
You had no answer. Because somehow, Taehyung had made even you question yourself.
Had it really been that bad? Hadn’t he always just loved you… deeply?
You came back. Of course you did.
But after that, he was even worse.
And now, here you were, uncertain of whether the events that just transpired were back luck or someone who was pulling the strings.
Despite that, your paranoia lessened as days went by.
It was like what happened the day of his discharge were just fluke because what followed was silence. News of him meeting his friends and even attending Hoseok’s concert were all over the social media. He was out there living his best life. It seemed like he was living well, it seemed like he had forgotten about you. There was even no attempt to contact you.
Maybe, the military life changed his outlook for the better.
Maybe the enlistment and rigorous life squashed the darkness and obsessive need in his hear.
Maybe you were overthinking.
But dear, how wrong you were.
It was a little over a week later when it happened—when everything began to unravel.
You were running late one night, dinner with colleagues stretching longer than expected. The car ride home was quiet, and all you could think about was how good it would feel to collapse into bed. You’d had one too many drinks, just enough to fumble with your keys at the door. They slipped from your hand, clattering to the floor.
You bent down to retrieve them—only for the door to slowly creak open on its own in the silence of the night.
Your blood ran cold.
Your gaze dropped to the bare feet inside your apartment, and slowly, it trailed upward—over the hem of cuffed jeans, up the muscular thighs that haunted too many of your memories. Your breath caught in your throat, your heart hammering in panic. You didn’t want to look. You didn’t need to.
Because you already knew.
But you didn’t have to wait for confirmation. Kim Taehyung crouched in front of you, his expression unreadable as he picked up the keys from the floor and held them out to you.
He held them out to you with a soft smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes.
“Looking for these?” he asked, voice low, calm, like he hadn’t just broken into your apartment. Like it was the most natural thing in the world for him to be here.
Your breath caught in your throat.
Your heart thundered against your ribs, panic clawing its way up as you stared at him—his face as achingly beautiful as ever, but his presence colder than the air-conditioned hallway behind you. You tried to speak, tried to find the words that could explain your fear, your confusion, your boundaries—but nothing came.
He tilted his head, studying you, then stood up to his full height. “You look tired,” he murmured, brushing a loose strand of hair from your face. “You shouldn't drink so much. It's not safe. What if something happened to you? You should have called me. You know I would have picked you up”
You flinched away from his touch, finally finding the strength to take a step back. “Taehyung,” you whispered, “what are you doing here? H-how did you find me?”
“Love, please don’t be mad,” his deep voice implored you as he reached for your hand, his grip, though it didn’t hurt, was tight. It was clear that you were not going anywhere. His unbridled strength was new to you. Taehyung had always been strong, but this was different.
He pulled you inside your apartment as though it was his, as though he had every right to be there himself. As soon as you stepped over the threshold, you noted the smell of homecooked meals. Your eyes went to your dining table where dinner was set, coupled with candles.
“W-why are you here? How did you find me?!” asked him, pulling your hand away as he closed the door gently. He leaned against the door, body relaxed, but his eyes never left you. And you just knew—if he didn’t want you to leave, you wouldn’t.
“You know…” he began, his voice almost wistful. “I tried to stay away. You hurt me when you left me, did you know that?”
You didn’t answer. You couldn’t.
“When you came to the base to break up with me, I was devastated,” he continued, stepping closer. “I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t eat. I kept thinking…why? Why would you say those things? I knew you were only pushing me away because of the eighteen months we had to be apart. That’s what it was, wasn’t it?” His voice dropped to a whisper, lips curving upward in a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “You were scared I’d forget you. You wanted to see if I’d chase you.”
You took another step back, but your spine hit the edge of the console table behind you.
“I tried,” he repeated, softer now. “I tried to respect your decision. To give you space. But I couldn’t stay away from you.”
His smile was almost self-deprecating. “Isn’t it pathetic that I could only stay away for a week?”
Your hands curled into fists at your sides as your body began to shake not from fear alone, but fury. Fury at him. At yourself. At the twisted, beautiful thing that love had turned into. You shook your head. “I didn’t try to break up with you, Taehyung,” you said through gritted teeth, voice rising despite your best efforts. “We broke up. I changed my number. I left my company. I moved apartments. I changed everything just so you wouldn’t be able to find me. We are over.”
There was a beat of silence.
Then, he tilted his head to the side. Something shifted in his expression—not anger, not sadness, but something worse. Amusement. A quiet, terrifying confidence.
You watched his muscles tense beneath the stretch of his black shirt, fabric clinging to the lean power he’d carved into himself over the past eighteen months. He looked different. Sharper. Bigger. A version of him that didn’t need to raise his voice to command a room—or to cage someone in it.
“You don’t really think I didn’t know where you were all this time… do you?” he asked, tone light, almost teasing. “Come on, darling. You know me better than that.”
Your blood turned to ice.
“You know I’d go crazy if I didn’t know where you are,” he continued, his smile softening as if this were some kind of confession, not an admission of obsession. “You know that.”
And just like that, the bottom fell out from under you.
The months of peace you thought you had—the freedom you clung to like a lifeline—all of it shattered in an instant. The new phone, the job, the address, the carefully orchestrated distance... none of it had ever mattered.
Because he had known.
He had always known.
And the freedom you had fought so hard for?
It had only ever been an illusion.
Your breath hitched. You felt it the cold seep of dread slipping into your bones, anchoring you in place as he stepped just a little closer.
“You didn’t really think you could disappear from me, did you?” he asked softly, brushing his fingers along your arm like he was soothing a frightened animal. “Don’t worry. I’m here now.”


if I write another story for when the member gets out of military, who would you want it to be?
#bts fic#yandere bts#bts yandere#yandere kim taehyung#kim taehyung x you#kim taehyung fic#kim taehyung x reader#kim taehyung x y/n
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Driving is certifiably bad for my mental health btw because I did have a 30-45 minute portion of a 3 hour drive where I was entirely prepared to eat someone 👍
#vividly imagining rear ending the car in front of me and then eating the driver <- guy who has insane anger issues he never resolved and#then other issues too probably#mags babs
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