#RE dracula is so good you guys

[buildoblivion]

listen dracula is my favourite gothic novel for many MANY reasons, but the winner has to be the literal ghost ship with a desperate dead man tied to the wheel in eternal prayer

[apuff]

Today i will rate the skies in the covers of the stuff i have on spotify

Because i am offline while writing this i am naturally restricted by what it will display for me

1. collide with the sky (ptv)

9/10. lighter towards the horizon, great hue shifting, nice fluffy clouds, i love how saturated and blue it all is. one thing i really like is how the field is green and the treeline is so dark because that's just how it is irl for realsies. i guess the only thing that's subpar iis that i feel like for that type of cloud, it would look much more defined? but i guess that's cause the sky can't be distracting too much from the subject. anyways, really nice work. 

2. Master of puppets (metallica)

2/10. Just getting some mixed messaging here. Like, the idea of it being all spooky and warm colors like that is cool, but it just…it all muddles into itself a little much. The light on the crosses doesn't look quite right and it's really hard to parse which parts of the sky are glowing or reflecting or clouds or the background or mountains. This album is really good though so i'll add a point for that

3. Danger days: the true lives of the fabulous killjoys (mcr)

10/10. What is there to say? I mean, awesome gradient…great mixture of scrappiness and fullness in the clouds…those colors are just beautiful…i love how the sun rays are radiating out from the spider in the middle…gotta rep the rest of this composition cause it slays. Seriously, great sky. 

4. Joke cover of my demolition lovers playlsit (mcr)

4/10. This is very standard and pedestrian but seeing as it's literally just a normal stock photo of a construction worker i can't judge it too harshly 

5. Glow (pkch)

9/10. Pukicho is a great photographer and i really appreciate the artistry of this one. My personal preference is for a more crisp and thick cloud but i really like the vagueness and fogginess of these ones. It gives off the impression of a sunset or a sunrise without putting a literal glowing sun or garish colors in, and i like the perspective of the clouds as they approach the horizon seen through how the bands of dark and light get closer and blend into one shade. Just a very beautiful photograph altogether, great colors. 

6. Spirit phone (lemon demon)

5/10. Wasn't even sure if this counted as a sky or not, and i eventually decided it takes place outside during the night, but i did have to dock points for barely even being what i'm rating. I love the strange abstractness of it, the smeared perspective lines that have no purpose other than to look weird. Honorary mention goes out to the characters in the foreground that, though ghosts, can be understood as weather phenomena due to the song in this album "soft fuzzy man" (about a sentient storm that wants to date the listener); giving them the dubious honor of the weirdest clouds ever.  

7. Embers (beetlebug)

8/10 Another edge case, but i decided the patches were clouds so it counted. As a fellow watercolor artist i'm naturaly drawn to this, but who wouldn't be? It's another one that handles the sunset situation with tact and depth; the white edges aren't just a great painting move- they express light shining onto the edges of clouds. Another very clever composition utilizing the sun. just great. 

8. Until the end (beetlebug) 

6/10. Less stunning than the last one, but it's charming in an understated way. It feels very simple and childlike, but does have touches of maturity from the nuanced colors and defined clouds. I really appreciate the bold choice to make the sun red, it's unexpected but striking. 

9. Ride the lighting (metallica)

3/10. Perhaps this is due to my complete lack of experience with thunderstorms, but i just don't like the black thin scrappy clouds. It feels so noncommittal. I'm guilty about rating it so low because i feel like the album cover, overall, looks great (especially the awesome 80s colors, those get compensation points from me) but every time i zero in on the sky itself, i'm just perplexed. 

10. Purrple cat💜 (purrple cat)

1/10. This is just fine. It's a normal sky. It has normal stars and normal planets and normal nebulae. It's so uninteresting. Doesn't attract the eye. Every item evenly spaced out from the other. I don't understand why that planet is glowing but so dark. it just doesn't make sense. 

11. Hallows eve masquerade (beetlebug)

10/10. This is basically the epitome of what's good about beetlebug covers- like, there's a kidlike charm to how simple it is, but there's a finesse to the colors and concept. This one just has such an expertly handled warm color pallete. Love the subtle glow and the centered composition. 

12. Bee and puppycat- official soundtrack playlist [[star swirling emoji]] (milan records)

10/10. See, THIS is how to do a space sky properly. The glowing things glow and it's not desaturated as all get out. This has a good handle on the subtle pink-and-green nebula glow and it's cohesive with the rest of the palette-- I guess that makes sense, because this show is interested in that retro look where chromatic aberration like that is common. 

13. Fly by night (rush)

5/10. Even though i'm not the hugest fan of it, i respect the choice to keep the background elements a solid color. It plain and cohesive, and making everything blue except for the yellow of the eyes is a good idea. 

14. ???? (??)

7/10. This is like 20 pixels but it looks very nice. Going into this i wasn't expecting so many of these to use the sun or moon as a focal point of the composition but i guess it makes sense. I like the color shifting to the horizon. 

15. Kingdom in blue (kupla)

10/10. AAAAAH!! I love how this is a sunset but much more cool colors than all the rest! You don't see the pink + teal a lot but it looks great. The floating island adds a nice flow to the whole thing and a fantastical edge to the more common lo-fi vibe. 

16. Let's cheers to this (sws)

10/10. You know, this would look great if i could SEE it. I'm too miffed to explain why it's good. 

17. Dracula reading playlist (elizabeth)

8/10. i feel like this matches the vibe of the playlist and the book very well. i'm not a huge fan of fog as a stated before but in this instance it really works to punch out the silhouette of the castle, which is the main point. I also like how it's just straight up red. evil.

18. Teal album (weezer)

0/10 i'm mad that i thought this was a sky but it's just a teal background

[clearcatastrophe]

“Yes, I was moved—I, Van Helsing, with all my purpose and with my motive for hate—I was moved to a yearning for delay which seemed to paralyse my faculties and to clog my very soul.”

Van Helsing, we get it, you’re not like other men set forth to do such a task as yours, but you are NOT immune to Vampire.

[eissaphir]

I just read the first email of our good friend Jonathan and can sympathise with him greatly, as I too know the darkest of horrors that are train delays.

[see-arcane]

@re-dracula immense shout out to the sound design here because, per usual, you guys know how to steer a soundscape so that it feels like the capping of one arc and the descent into another

The closing music has the tone of 'Wow, that stuff with Lucy was pretty harrowing, huh? What comes next is worse.' In my mind I could picture the camera pulling out of the asylum and over a night sky-view of Carfax Abbey, the moon looking abruptly like an undead eye peering through the clouds... Excellent stuff

Petition to have the Re: Dracula cast and crew be behind an Actually Good Dracula animated series someday, please please please

[darchildre]

So, I finally started listening to Re: Dracula this past weekend. (I can do serials if I'm reading, but it doesn't work for things I listen to. I need to build up a bunch of it and binge, so I had put off listening to the podcast til it was mostly done.)

You guys, it is so good. I have sampled a lot of Dracula audiobooks over the years, including some full-cast ones, and I genuinely think this the best I've ever heard. I'm only 20-some episodes in so far, but there have been so many tiny amazingly effective choices that have made me so happy. (Never getting over the moment where Dracula just casually dropped into a completely unremarkable British accent for half a sentence, just to freak Jonathan out. Beautiful. Perfect. Dracula has never been more frightening.)

I'm so happy this is a thing that exists in the world.

[chemicallywrit]

Happy Audio Drama Sunday! I was busy doing many things this week, but luckily they were the kind of things that facilitate a lot of audio drama listening. Shall we?

👹 G.O.B.L.I.N.S. is amazing. I love an office sitcom in any case, but an office sitcom with two goblins, an elf prince, and an overly enthusiastic government pencil pusher is an inspired idea. I really want this show to exist more, so if you can, consider helping them on their crowdfund!

💋 Josie’s Lonely Hearts Club this week was HILARIOUS. The presidential puns were so delightful, and I also ended the episode wanting to fight a veterinarian. Can’t wait to see where this season is going.

🌚 @hellofromthehallowoods is always so good at creating these gorgeous soft character moments, and I adore middle-aged Buck. Watching this man gracefully age into a husband and father who likes himself, who knows he is loved, is such a far cry from the poor little guy he used to be. I really don’t want him to get eaten by a vampire. Are you hearing me, Mx Wellman?

📻 Breaker Whiskey ended for now and ohhhhhhh. Oh man. I cried. The experience of listening to this story feels very early audio drama, and that’s definitely by design. Lauren Shippen let the story wander and discover itself, and we got to discover it too. Was it a flawless story? No story is, but getting to revel in the wandering just made it better. Whatever’s next for the story, I have enjoyed the ride.

🥛 The Silt Verses. That’s it. I found this episode entrancing. How’s this going to end?

🥃 Breathing Space this week was hilarious. In a rare voice acting appearance by Pacific Obadiah and some familiar voices from Melissa Lusk and Katrina Pecina as well as the ol' Breathing Space standbys, this heartfelt, witty, and above all very silly episode felt really good. I just loved it.

🐟 In Travelling Light this week, VERMI'S BACK. My favorite guy! And it seems we won't be seeing the last of this guy, either. Thank you Hero for my life. Friendship is gonna solve all the traveller's problems and I couldn't be happier.

🧟‍♀️ In Hannah News, The Dead started a new series called Turas that I really think you should check out. It’s set on a Scottish isle with Scottish Gaelic, and zombies, and sister dynamics, and it’s so good guys. Our main actors, Michelle Kelly and Bonnie Calderwood Aspinwall, are absolutely killing it, alongside an amazing cast. Please tune in, you won't regret it.

🧛🏻‍♀️ Also this week, I got the chance to hop on Re: Dracula's July Q&A for our patrons! You gotta check out our patreon, y'all, creating gothic fiction has been so much fun. We're hard at work on Carmilla while Re: Drac is having its second go-round. Join usssssss.

That's all for me this week! It's long enough as it is. See you next week!

[annabelle--cane]

okai renfield 2023 thoughts: the critical consensus is correct, this is not a very good movie, but I found it a lot of fun and if you're a dracula enjoyer who doesn't mind constant action scenes that are gory to the point of farce then I'd recommend giving it a watch.

and for some longer thoughts (ft spoilers):

not a whole lot of black characters for a movie that takes place in new orleans.

I liked how they leaned into the bela lugosi pastiche, they really went for it with dracula's design and the few re-made scenes, I found that really fun.

like many other tumblr users I have Problems with the way "narcissism" has entered the pop psychology lexicon, but I like the overall premise of reading dracula as a very mundane and recognizable kind of abusive boss.

I don't think this could have been handled well in a movie like this so I'm glad they didn't go for it, but I personally think there was room to do something interesting if they had adapted in renfield's psychosis. like, psychotic people are particularly vulnerable to getting trapped in abusive relationships and dracula wields a lot of "the outside world will hate you, only I truly care" over renfield's head, I think a more indie project with a similar premise could have really gotten into the weeds with that and said something meaningful about ableism and this "simpering minion" archetype which renfield has been assigned by pop culture.

I don't usually care about this too much but I noticed some fairly poor shot-to-shot continuity across a few scenes. ex., before the restaurant fight kicks off, rebecca steps directly up to the barrel of ted's gun and almost presses it directly into her forehead in a big emphasized act of defiance, but when we cut to different angles she's standing a good few inches farther away.

there was some fun set up and pay off, ex. the ant farm, the cocaine magic circle.

I enjoyed the evil milf, I must say. wish we got more of her but she just kind of disappears at the end

the fight scenes bored me at first but eventually they crossed the gore event horizon and became hilarious. sure, the sense of stakes kind of gets lost when our protagonists are regularly dropping like twice the bodies of the antagonists, but more importantly, renfield ripped a guy's fucking arms off.

I am absolutely begging to know what the thought process was behind the quinc(e)y morris allusions. I would assume that the implication is that rebecca and her family were distantly related to book quincey somehow, but then why do they have his first name as a last name and not his actual last name? why was her dad called morris quincy? I am flummoxed.

would love to do a proper comparison with bit 2019, focusing on how they play with the dracula mythos and portray vampirism as power imbalance, but that would require brain cells and I am sorely deficient on those.

[pinkiepiebones]

Guys I keep dredging up old Renfield articles by people who got to visit the set and I am MAKING A FORMAL DEMAND THAT UNIVERSAL RELEASE THE DIRECTOR'S CUT AND/ OR THE REST OF THE DELETED SCENES I AM B E G G I N G

Stuff I pulled from this article. My commentary in parenthesis.

"The role of Dracula has to be played like a movie star, with charisma that makes us understand why people like Renfield would want to follow him around for nearly a century." (Okay but they were also in love. For a bit.)

"Dracula and Renfield have been on the run from vampire hunters for the last 70 years." (SO WAIT DID THEY HAVE TWO DECADES OF CHILL TIMES BEFORE ANYONE CAUGHT WIND OF VAMPIRE HAPPENINGS AND SET OUT TO KILL THEM?)

"The mobster Lobo family has been involved in criminal enterprises in New Orleans since the 17th century, and for a mural that showcases the Lobo family history, Hammond originally planned on hiding hundreds of wolf heads within the image." (WHAAAAAAT)

"Ridley says that there weren’t any restrictions from Universal when taking on Dracula in this way." (Honestly big W for Universal there)

"When Dracula becomes angry and more primal, his teeth become longer and extend further." (Hot.)

"The lining of Dracula’s red leather cape has a brilliant design of bats". (Honestly just give Lisa Lovaas and the costume team all the awards)

"One of Dracula’s canes opens up and there’s a sword inside. While it’s never shown in the film, it’s again, another remarkable showcase of the film’s level of detail." (1 I would like to see it 2 all y'all good Dracfield writers need to write them fencing or smth)

"Hoult discussed the opening scene of the film, which involves Hoult and Cage getting green-screened into the previous Dracula movies." (DUDE. THERE WAS MORE FLASHBACK FOOTAGE. I - FUCK!! GIVE IT TO ME!!!!!!! Like I know the director said that, like Lego Batman, this Dracula was going to be THE Dracula, from Bela Lugosi to Gerard Butler, but I wanna see it!)

"The opening has Dracula being attacked in his library room by Van Helsing and priests" (VAN HELSING?!?! No wonder he knew Renfield's name... Oh, wow...)

"We also were able to tour the hallway that Hoult was running down, full of fire, dead bodies, and blood. Again, the attention to detail was immaculate in the sets, and through the hallway and the library room, we can see centuries of Dracula’s life being told simply through the set design. Items that were once regal and impressive are now covered in dust and left in tatters. You can feel the centuries of age on Dracula’s possessions, and the wear that must’ve occurred on these items in the trek from Europe to New Orleans." (Just give the set designers and prop makers all the awards)

And I saw it mentioned in the article and elsewhere- Fangoria, I think- but Apache Joe had a backstory and his mask is made out of the tongues of his victims

Anyway, I want a production book for this fucking movie. I want a novelisation. I want a 4K UHD Halloween re-release director's cut. I want a line of shirts from Fright Rags. I want this to be a cult classic. I love Renfield so fucking much you guys ;-;

[grifff17]

Audiodrama Sunday 5/12/24

Lots of "holy shit" moments in new episodes of shows this week, and I started Mockery Manor s3.

I'm not really a horror person, but I'm enjoying @re-dracula. I didn't expect Dracula to be so likeable. Like he's just a guy who thinks England is really cool. I'm sure that he's totally legit and there's a normal explanation for all this, right?

I listened to @longcatmedia's Mockery Manor miniseries The Bette Tapes, and started the third season. The Bette tapes were fun, at first I thought that Bette was taking advantage of Margot, but she's just going into debt which is much funnier. So far I like that the third season is going towards a more traditional murder-mystery plot. By the end of the first episode I realized exactly what was going to happen, and who it was going to happen to.

Season finale of @camlannpod! There was some really good character work in this episode. Gwaine is such a layered character, Gwen is great, and I loved the story of how Dai and Perry met. Also a great season ending, I love hopeful post-apocalypses. I desperately hope this show gets another season.

@worldgonewrongpod this week was wonderful. How much of that stuff about sewer gators and tunnel networks below Chicago is true? I was totally unable to tell when the real history ended and the fiction began.

We also got episode 2 of @wanderersjournalpod. I like the epistolary format. Also, the forest civilization Marigold is from is interesting, I'm excited to learn more about it.

I listened to some more @breakerwhiskey, but not totally caught up. Fox implied that killing Junior will fix the world, I wonder why. It looks like Whiskey is finally close to being reunited with Harry.

@midstpodcast this week blew my mind, then I looked at my phone and there were still 25 minutes left in the episode. Hieronymus holy shit! And then Imogen! This show loves to reveal details that totally recontextualize characters.

@worldsbeyondpod was fucking incredible. Poor Nief (I doubt that's how you spell it). DC25 for the overworked child to accept help! Then the rest of the coven of elders showed up and it blew my mind. Brennan Lee Mulligan's descriptions are one of the best parts of this show, and the sound design to go along with it was amazing.

That's all for this week, next week is a new Midnight Burger and I think Mission Rejected too, I'm excited.

[2n2n]

ch.115

MORE EXCITING THAN ANTICIPATED.........!?!!? unimaginable...

I can't believe Aida-sensei really committed to having to draw that Dorothy outfit so much....! omgg it would be so easy to have Nene-chan change out right after her play..... suppose she wanted to get in a couple more pages of that girl before changing her back huaah..

NENE-CHAAAAAN!!!!!! I'M SORRY GIRL............ I'M SORRY ABOUT YOUR CATASTROPHICALLY AND CATEGORICALLY BAD TAAAAAAAAASTE.... I'M SORRY FOR YOUR OWN CONSEQUENCES ........

I can feel it so viscerally though, ugh. I can look at mine or my husband's past flop dating history, escapades..... imagine being dumped in-media-res to my shitty potentials while I'm trying to find my beautiful husband.....................

good representation of the rat

eehghrglg

NENE-CHAAAAAN I'M SORREEYYYYYY!!!! omfgggg it's really so real... imagine being dumped into my pan poly aro days .... the fucking cruising grind girl aourouuruuru

this is so funny though, it's like........ Hanako really did a favor for her by harassing her so much and conscripting her, then? WHAT a way to spin it.... but really, being with Hanako did teach Nene-chan what it's like to be more deeply and seriously invested in someone TT__TT his history, his life, his moods, his desires.... you can see how poor Nene-chan just gets... swept up in whatever is around her, and if the people around her are shallow, she's not able to imagine or invent anything better than what's presented to her....

you can't just invent or enterprise for better, in high school especially....! who can teach you it could be more, if there's no evidence of that in your life..... if all a girl has is a boy only giving her the time of day if she does chores, or a chauvanist bastard, what can she doooo...!

but it's so ah.............................. the new opportunity of Hanako , it's endearing isn't it.... you can understand their raw compatibility, two playful goons, childish in ways, goofing off all the time.... playing games.... but then Hanako has these edges of tenderness & darkness, mouuuu. First time having a best friend, is what it feels like, firstly... I love the ways he inadvertently makes Nene-chan more thoughtful and compassionate, just by existing next to her... he doesn't even ask her to solve anything about him.... he'd rather keep it shallow too, at the start, but the inertia of their chemistry won't allow it to stagnate....

and now. the scariest possible thing in the entire universe

you feel untrustworthy to me.... there is something sick & twisted about you............. put this guy ina cage tie him to a post... he looks wiley......... ouuuuuu I won't forget you skipping and humming while girls summon your cursed otouto.... ooo I won't forget you won't trick me.... ouuuuuuuuu *STANDING BEHIND FURNITURE*

it is a bad sign to me that you have a smug or arrogant aura... as my husband said, "closer to a dracula" ..... you're not a little meep nerdo or mopey sad guy..... my hackles my hackles are raiiiised... yabe

now pause... paws...

what is with you, Amane, you are definitely just making instant coffee.... this isn't even a fancy thing to do... this is the equivalent of putting a packet of hot cocoa powder into a mug, but you're doing it in this convoluted way... for what, for who, do you do this every day like this...... it's kind of lame but really funny also. Is this creating intrigue? Are you trying to seem cool? Did you just forget your mug in the break room? At first I thought he was doing a fanciful method of brewing but he is NOT..... there are no filters here... Yugi-sensei....!?!?

ooooo its happening ooooooooo... im getting aggressions.... ooooo youuu-- I know you're stupid............... look at you......

now, what do you think this experience was like for Yugi-sensei (since as it seems, these are not dreams or delusions or ghosts, but time-travel-like shenanigans with real consequences as streams cross, meaning both Nene-chan and Yugi-sensei equally experienced each other as an anomaly), who has a random girl walk into his science prep room in the 1980s, and she's like, objectively his type

"hmm lol who is this girl I don't recognize from any of my classes .... kinda nice with it tho ? haha whaaat since when am I into students lol ? " girl disappears seconds later. gets all scared like uweh (((Amane who is canonically bad with horror)) kowai.... what was that....... *standing alone in a room with a half-chub*

you know even bandaged pre-murder boy, for all that's going on in his life, still somehow had it in him to be horny about Nene-chan. it's an unstoppable force like that. Amazing that at age 27 Amane can finally like contain it and ''''''act normally'''' (not normal!!!) (but not run away or instantly start sexually harassing)

meanwhile, kind of untenable that he is also like "haha what do you want to talk about. perhaps maybe that cursed rumor everyone's into" like, don't you be bringing your haunted otouto up so often, creep..... what agenda is this!!!!! don't bring it up casually!!! it's suspicious!!!!!!!!

GET A JOB STAY AWAY FROM HER!!!!!! what are you gonnaa pour her a BEAKER? you gonna do your whole production with the tongs AGAIN? is this you being cool, Yugi-sensei? ooooo ... VILLAIN

but ... (containing my fear) I feel for poor Nene-chan.... poor poor thing.... what a strange, inexplicable figment... your beloved.... something unseen.... something unknown....

very artfully and sweetly conveyed.... I'm happy to see Nene-chan get to meet a Yugi-sensei in his heyday, despite how the ages work out in her exact era... Iro-sensei is very clever for creating the excuse of unstable time around the Festival, and this situation only lasting 3 days anyway. It's a nice, exact circumstance... it has a good, fated feeling. I like that Tsukasa prepped Nene-chan for understanding this situation....

you've found him....! something to chase after.... poor girl.... you can do it, Nene-chan....!

really excited for what she'll do next.... where do we go from here, girl...? You know he worked here, now.... how do we find out more? It's still up in the air, if he's still alive, or not.... if he lived in the Red House... ?

meanwhile, Mitsuba looking broke af

not into it... not into you normally either but not into this hat... very funny though... this is extremely middle schooler vibes.... bucket hat.... striped undershirt....

well, I'll comment on things even if I'm only vaguely interested...

Kou seems to be calmer and more knowledgeable/experienced, which goes with him being already established as an 'exorcist'... I wonder if it, in turn, has something to do with Teru being engaged? I wonder what their roles are ....

uuhghghhh and the gatcha finally reveals what boy we have here in this world..................

AMANEEEEEEEEEEEEE WHAT DID YOU DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

BABY GIRL...

what happeneddddddd what happened.ddd.... pleaaase... it could not be more extreme..... is this what you're humming and skipping about, Amane? Why are you satisfied-seeming? Why are you spreading the rumor of this? WHAT DID YOU DO!!!!!!

T H E T W I N S H A V E B E C O M E A G E G A P P E D

THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!!!

ohhh little haunted boy unwell unwell.... hole boy.... oobie though... kind of booboo ... worthy of love I think, open to love, must love.... kind of a strange rare gatcha here, this isn't birthday boy, this isn't even recognizable garden boy, this is a wholly new outfit.... surprised to see bare feet... unkempt, dirty seeming... why on EARTH is he THIS AGE !??! what age IS THIS exactly anyway, I can't even be 100% sure!!!! 3??? 4 ???? 5??? did Amane dictate-- any of this??? but honestly it's exactly as incomprehensible as 13 y/o SHOSEI SWAG Tsukasa in the main timeline, an outfit we have equally no context for yet, or proof he even wore when alive at a particular time....

WE FINALLY GET A BONUS NEXT ISSUE.... god uhhhghh meeting Tsukasa-chan finally.... and Nene-chan is seeking her boy.... arrghhhh!!!!!!!!! URAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[gorbalsvampire]

Clarimonde Explains It All

She’s not what I expected.

You say “elder vampire lady” to me and I’m picturing floor-length crimson ballgowns, nails and cheekbones you could cut yourself on, lips the only thing about her with any colour in it.

Clarimonde is five-five of boho chic; dress over jeans, big hat on the back of her chair, OG Doc Martens she's not been assed to lace up all the way. She does have long nails, but I’m pretty sure they’re fakes. There’s a tiny glass on the table in front of her, and it’s empty; can she keep it down?

She leans back to air-kiss Dominique, real old-school mwah-mwah lovely-to-see-you-babe; introduces herself in French, and smiles when I stutter my way through my je m’appelles and have to say in English, “but everyone except my mum calls me Tish.”

“Tish. My pleasure. So, why has Dominique brought you to see another old lady?”

Dominique glances at me — permission granted — and I explain there’s something I’m not getting from her and she thought hearing it in another voice would be good for me.

“I’ve lived a very boring life, my dear. Dominique has been around the world three times and left a trail of nonsense in her wake, what could I —“

“It’s the way you tell it,” says Dominique, rolling her eyes. “And of the two of us, who’s been on television?”

It’s Clarimonde’s turn to roll her eyes, and she does it with a little sniff that’s much more my idea of “elder vampire.”

“I was immortalised without my permission,” says Clarimonde. “You shouldn’t let poets lie to you, Tish; they tell you that you’ll live forever, they neglect to mention ‘as a petty pretty monster who leads innocent young men around by their dicks and away from God’. It could be worse; look what happened to poor Louis and his confessional. How many books of revision to his life story are there, now?”

“For real? The guy from —“

“Yes. The first at least is a true story. There’s a grain of truth at the bottom of all the stories. For instance; mine is truly the world’s oldest profession. I liked being called a ‘courtesan’, I wasn’t keen on ‘moll’, ‘whore’ has always been an insult…”

“What do you think of ‘sex worker’?” It’s out of my mouth before I know what I’m saying. Go for woke, I guess.

“Matter of fact, boring — but honest, which has its charms.” She smiles. “But — to stay on topic, because Dominique is making the face,” and she is, “let me forestall the inevitable question. Him too, and he was a piece of work.”

“The thing Clarimonde does so well,” Dominique explains from her end of the sofa, “is talk about men.”

“About a specific class of people,” says Clarimonde, and her pout looks like she wants to poke her tongue out of it. “Mostly men, who did awful things, frequently to women, and who happened to be like us. I’ve collected vampire stories ever since I was in one, and for the longest time they all had something in common. Take Dracula. Born in the fifteenth century. In the nineteenth, he re-emerges with a grand plan; he’ll move himself to what he’s been told is the greatest city on Earth and he’ll re-invent himself as a modern monster. What does he do when he gets there? Obsess over the first girl he gets his teeth into, and stalk his solicitor’s wife to punish the man for escaping, or whatever mad reason he had. Not just a monster but a failure. Why do you think that happens?”

“He’s got really poor impulse control?”

“And you said she didn’t get it.” Clarimonde laughs behind her hand, and for a second I can see her in costume-drama gear, peeking over a fan. “He’d been around too long. Once he’d been an empire-builder, and he remembered being that, but — did he really remember? Can the mind hold on to what it was five hundred years ago? Four hundred? When we cheat ourselves and say we were better people as little girls, from only ten or twenty years away?”

“I get it,” I say, practically talking over her. “I think. You’re saying he was trying to be who he thought he was, what history said he was. But really, he was… just a vampire.”

“And what a piece of work is a vampire?” she purrs, declaiming at her little glass. “Just a being who thirsts. A paragon of animals. Over time, we forget what else we were. Dominique brought you to me because I’m old. Because there are so few older. I’m a simple girl at heart; I take money and a little blood from people who have both to spare. It’s a simple rule, and it’s not a big plan, and it’s not much to hold on to.

“I keep my memories in stories. I don’t know if I’ve always looked this way, or if I saw that girl pretending to be me and made myself like her. Do you know Louis went back to his maker in the end? After everything he told, everything in that book, he went back on bended knee because he’d started to believe what was made up about him afterwards. He went back to a man he’d tried to kill and he thought he was in love. But he’s still alive, and he’s doing no harm to anyone but himself. And maybe one day I’ll wake up with a rosary in my hand and a pretty boy in my bed and I’ll hope to God he paid for it. That’s what happens when we live too long, Tish. We start believing what they say about us.”

One of the core impulses behind Bloodspell was "literary vampires are real but the version of their stories you get is off." Deconstructing the vampire as antagonist/romantic hero, y'know?

[gilgamushroom]

Catching up on Re: Dracula and Felix Trench's performance as Renfield in Oct. 1 IS SO GOOD I'M EATING THE WALLS

I can't put it into words but the way he delivers the lines when he's making a case for his sanity? You can HEAR the charm Seward talks about. And then the bitter and sardonic way he talks in the aftermath? AND THEN. When he breaks down??

The phrase "woe is me" has never managed to have much of an effect on me because of how far it has fallen out of the vocabulary but Felix delivers it so naturally so gut-wrenchingly he's just a guy under so much stress in the worst situation and he's trying so hard. The whole speech feels so so real. The Dracula text is ALIVE

I HAVEN'T EVEN MENTIONED HIS SONG AT THE END I-

RENFIELD MY BELOVED ❤

[cerise-grenadine]

Dracula — 2010.

Currently re-reading Dracula, the best book in the world with Jane Eyre, so thought I'd post this because I still like them.

Having read it many times, the Gothic atmosphere of the beginning is now completely lost on me because I'm too busy laughing at the logistics. (spoilers ahead, but about things in like the 2nd chapter)(also if you haven't read Dracula yet, go read it. it's amazing.)

Like. Jonathan is virtually alone with Dracula in the castle. There's no one else. Which means Dracula is taking care of all his needs. He cooks. He makes coffee. He cleans the table. Does he do the dishes and change Jonathan's sheets also? [update: i had forgotten that he does do the bed, that's how Jonathan finds out there are no servants T-T] because I checked and Jonathan stays for almost two months. How comes an aristocrat, who has been dead for centuries, knows how to make coffee?! Did he go grocery shopping? Jonathan has a roast chicken and cheese for his first meal in the castle.

I just read

Presently, with an excuse, he left me, asking me to put away all my papers together. He was some little time away. [...] It was the better part of an hour when the Count returned. 'Aha!' he said, 'still at your books? Good! But you must not work always. Come; I am informed that your supper is ready.'

Bro. YOU made supper.

Do you think he has an apron? does he taste the food he makes to make sure it's good? does he have cooking books? Because that dinner is then said to be "excellent".

I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS. And I just find the whole thing hilarious. I'm now 100% sure Dracula does the dishes more often than I do and the guy is dead.

[see-arcane]

Haven't seen anyone screaming about it yet, so I will: @re-dracula's NEW CARMILLA TRAILER GOOD

Major points:

It's the best kind of bittersweet hearing Abraham van Helsing's voice switching from kindly paternal figure to this absolutely heartbroken vengeful father in the trailer. Kudos on the impending Pain I will suffer from Alan Burgon :')

It is trippy as hell hearing Karim Kronfli voicing a good guy after Dracula. Extreme audio whiplash in the best way

Sasha Sienna is going to make my heart hurt. I'm ready. (lying)

If I had a nickel for every time Jonathan Sims played a doctor in yet another classic supernatural vampire tale, I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but it's strange and fantastic that it happened twice

Miss Carmilla. Miss Carmilla ma'am. That is some next level Distraction+ of a voice you have there. Thank you Méabh de Brún, my mind is a blissful blue screen after hearing your line

In all ways but physical I am pressed up against my phone screen whispering 'pakidge??' as I wait for my next classic lit vampire fix

[moonchild-in-blue]

Now that we know Jonno is alive and (fairly) well, and Dracula is Lucy and Mina's problem now, can we get a glimpse of Renfield and Seward?

I miss my ✨morally ambiguous✨ doctor and his Totally Normal patient.

@re-dracula I blame my hyperfixation on you guys. Doc. Seward's voice is SO fine for no good reason.