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comewithmeintothedeep · 2 years ago

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Fem!Reader X Anubis

Word Count: 11,431 Explicit: Yes Warnings: Death, murder, abuse mention, knotting.

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The Hall of Truth. The domain of the gods of Egypt. Where the fates of many souls were determined, weighed for their merit and for their truth. The Weighing of the Heart and Soul. The ritual was a communal one, but it was Anubis’s scale that determined the fate of mortals that arrived in these Halls.

One such mortal was you. As you were walked towards his scales in the Luminous Halls, the God of Death tilted his chin up at you. His expression was neutral, but his interest was piqued. There was something…innately interesting about humans and he couldn’t help but take them in every time one walked into his Halls.

His daughter, Qebhet, walked you to him, kindly offering you a bowl of fresh water as you approached as she always did when a new soul walked through the Hall. The serpent woman’s bright scales glittered like a thousand stars were embedded into the surface of the luminous moon.

She was beautiful, just like her mother. A woman who was now residing beyond the Hall where she belonged in the Afterlife.

And now, here you stood in white robes. A sure sign that your life was not a long-lived one. Anubis couldn’t help but feel a pang of disappointment at the thought of such a thing. It’s not as though he wasn’t used to seeing it. The world was chaotic and life could be cruel. Mortals could only exist at the whims of nature’s hand.

But that didn’t make it any less disappointing to see lives that could have burned so brightly snuffed out before they could properly start.

And here you stood, guided here by Qebhet’s kindness and standing before your Judge, Anubis. The Black Jackal. God of Death, Mummification, the Afterlife, and Patron God of the Lost and the Helpless.

Surrounding him was Thoth - the Ibis God of Wisdom, Writing, Magic, the Moon, and Equilibrium – and Osiris - Lord of the Underworld and Judge of the Dead.

And Anubis’s father.

So, even though the Scales that weighed your heart and soul belonged to him, his Father had the final say on whether you could join your people in the Afterlife.

A small fact that annoyed him, but it was the way things were. After all, no one contested the King.

As you stood before him, you knew what you must do. It was unmistakeable. You knew your fate when your father stormed into your room, furious. When he began to choke you and you couldn’t stay conscious.

Your father had killed you…but why?

You looked so lost. Anubis could recognize that expression on your elegant face in an instant. You died suddenly. Without warning and without knowledge. It was a death that was done to you by someone else.

Anubis couldn’t help but take pity on you and you hadn’t even appealed to the scales, yet.

Kneeling before you, hoping to offer you a sense of comfort and security, the God of Death took your hand in his and spoke gently to you. “You have arrived in the Hall of Truth. You have served your people faithfully and now you kneel before the Scales. Your Heart and Soul will be weighed and judged…and your place in the Underworld will be determined.”

You nodded. You were afraid, of course. And confused. But you were ready. So brave despite how lost you were.

“Bear your heart so that the Gods may bear witness and the Scales can judge you accordingly.” Anubis said to you, gently. Softly. Kindly.

You knew what you needed to do. Your phrases. Thoth stood prepared with his papyrus, ready to record the ceremony. And you recited them from your heart. You were innocent. You had never done anything wrong. You hadn’t even married anyone, yet.

So why…why did your father kill you?

There was so much uncertainty in you. And yet, from your soul, you gave Anubis your heart for him to weigh on the scale. Even before weighing it, the God could tell that you would pass. But there was something about you that made him want to know more. Mostly because clearly…you didn’t. And some part of him felt that you were owed that information.

Ani Ba sat comfortably on the scale, the routine familiar. Sure enough, just as he suspected, your heart was lighter than the feather on the scale. You were allowed to proceed into the Underworld and you were spared from the jaws of the demon, Ammit.

Taking your heart from the scale, Anubis gave it back to you. “You may proceed. Speak your peace, if you have one to make. Your voice is heard, here.”

You swallowed, hesitant. Was this really it? Of course, you were honoured. But…was this really right? There was so much that didn’t make sense. So much that didn’t add up. “My name is (Name).” You started, hands clasped together, your gaze towards Osiris. “I don’t know why exactly I’m here. I…I lived a good life. I was loyal and faithful and kind. I lived a normal life a woman like me would live. But…my father killed me. And I don’t know why.”

You looked around at the deities around you for any sort of answer. “Do you?”

Anubis was not cruel. He was certainly weak, however. Your pleas tugged at the strings of his divine heart and he could only do his duty. After all, he was the God of Lost Souls. It was his job to guide them. And you certainly needed that guidance, now.

Standing up, Anubis took you by the hand and looked towards his father and towards Thoth. His request was clear on his face. “My lords?” He asked, gaze fixed on the ibis god. “It is only fair that we grant her request. She is lost.”

Thoth hummed as he considered Anubis’s query. “She is certainly lost, but some answers only create more forks in the path.” He cautioned. “And answers do not necessarily translate to finding one’s way forward.”

He heard the elder god’s words of warning, but Anubis wouldn’t relent. This was his domain and he would not be prevented from fulfilling it. “I understand, wise one.” He replied calmly. “But it is my solemn duty to grant her request as her patron.”

“He is right to demand those answers in his duty to guide the lost.” The voice of Nehemetawy could be heard from beside Thoth. The woman’s eyes were kind as she regarded you, warm and enveloping. “She is in need. Would it not be cruel to deny her the answers she cannot get otherwise? The poor girl cannot prosper in the Afterlife if she remains ignorant.”

Another woman on Thoth’s arm looked you over, eyebrows raised in thought. “The answers she seeks I can provide.” Seshat offered, glancing up at her husband softly. “They would be written on the sacred tree…I can show her the truth she yearns for.”

You looked up at the pantheon, hoping they would grant you mercy and take pity on you. You could feel Anubis squeezing your hand in an attempt to comfort you.

Osiris was staring down at you, the noble and divine pharaoh deliberating on the decision before he raised his hand, the crook within it cementing his decision. “You may accompany her to the persea tree, my son.” The King decreed. “Thoth, allow your wife to guide Anubis and this lost soul to the tree so that she may pass on in peace and with a clear conscience.”

Without question, Thoth bowed in respect to Osiris. “Of course, My King.”

Stepping forward, Seshat took the canine god’s other hand in hers and looked towards you sagely. “Right this way, (Name).”

Obediently, you followed. You were in the good graces of your gods and you would be in no position to disrespect them. Especially after being so kind and merciful to you in your hour of dire need.

Gracefully, Seshat walked, her white robes and headdress flowing behind her as though she was walking into a desert wind. As they left the Hall, the walls began to be lined with books. People and other deities were studying them. This holy space was heavily populated. After all, your people’s pantheon was quite large. There were over 2000 gods and goddesses.

And for someone who had never looked at or laid with a man or woman, you couldn’t help but take notice of the way Anubis was holding your hand as he followed the goddess through the library.

Many halls and staircases surrounded you, all lined with generations and thousands of years of knowledge. You couldn’t imagine that this was all the knowledge of the past. With the divine powers the gods held, there had to be tomes here from the future. It was the only thing that could possibly be this expansive and infinite.

Was such knowledge a blessing or was it a curse? You could only guess. After all, you were only mortal. What was a blessing for the gods may most certainly be a curse for you.

Throughout the halls, you marveled. Your eyes were wide and you barely had any time to take it all in. Anubis couldn’t help but be enamoured by your natural curiosity. There was something just…so innocent about you. So pure. And it showed in the way you looked at the world. The way you looked at his world.

Soon enough, after many halls and corridors, Seshat led the two of you to the large room with the great persea tree. This room was less like a library and more like an atrium. The ceiling was made entirely of glass panes and a bright holy light filtered through it and the leaves of the great tree. You had never seen a sight so beautiful.

The goddess in white led you to sit beneath the tree, drawing a circle around you and directing you to sit directly in front of her. “The tree will give you the answers you seek.” She said with certainty. “But I must warn you…you may not find them comforting. Just as my husband said, finding your answers will not necessarily guarantee that you will find your way. And it won’t guarantee that it will alleviate the listlessness you feel.”

You nodded. You knew this could be true. After all, you were only yourself. What you knew was only what you could know.

After all…there couldn’t be a good reason you father murdered you. “I’m ready.”

With a nod and a wave of her hand, the fallen leaves surrounding you began to swirl around you. Anubis was no stranger to the magic of his fellow deities, but it did not lessen its impact when he was a witness to it. They truly were fantastical things.

From the flurry, a few of the tree’s leaves fluttered down to rest in Seshat’s hands. As she held them, she began to recognize them properly. After all, every action done by every human was recorded on these leaves by her. She wouldn’t be able to recognize one in the hundreds and thousands she recorded, but upon laying her eyes upon the leaves that held your story, recognition flashed before hers.

And not just because she recorded them herself.

“Your father killed you because you were not his daughter.” She told you plainly with finality.

You blinked at her, eyes wide as you froze in fear. You…weren’t his daughter? “What do you mean?” You asked.

“Your mother was unhappy in her marriage and you came from another man’s loins.” Seshat explained in further detail. “Your mother was preparing to escape and leave with you after your father discovered the truth, but it was too late. He killed you before she could get to you.”

Worlds felt like they were crashing down on you. All along, you looked up to him as your father. He was never anything else to you than your father. You loved him. And he loved you. He raised you with grace and dignity and he never treated you as anything less than his daughter that he loved so dearly.

To think that it could all fall away so easily…that your father could change so quickly that he could kill you…

It was unthinkable. The shock was enough to make you go numb, but that would wear off. And the weight of the revelation would stick with you.

Anubis could see it in your eyes. Inevitably, Thoth was right. The answers you received only served to make you more lost. But in hearing your story, he felt gripped by an immense sense of empathy. You deserved better than this.

But he couldn’t dwell on that. You were a lost soul and it was his duty to guide you. There were no further answers for you, here. As the leaves settled around you once again, Anubis reached down to gently brush your shoulder, offering his hand for you to take. “Come with me, (Name).” He urged softly.

Looking up at him, you did as he asked. He was you anchor in this strange world and in the chaos that was your dawning sense of realization, he was the only thing keeping you tethered. Keeping you sane.

Turning his canine head towards the goddess, he bowed his head. “Thank you, Seshat.” He said reverently. “Your help is appreciated.”

Nodding, Seshat remained in place beneath the persea tree. “Go with purpose.”

Gently pulling you up to your feet, the God of Death guided you through the library halls. He ignored the prying eyes of many in it. After all, it wasn’t uncommon for gods to have multiple consorts.

One of which being Anubis’s cousin, Sobek, son of Set. Crocodile-headed God of the Nile, Fertility, and Crocodiles. He was married, but he was also known for having many consorts, both well-known and obscure. He was also known as the Lord of Semen.

He was a bombastic presence in contrast to Anubis’s more quiet and reserved thoughtful nature. Sobek was more erratic and…animalistic. He could be erratic and unpredictable and even violent, much like his father. It was why he was a powerful military presence.

But surprisingly, despite the…bad blood between their fathers, Sobek and Anubis got along decently. At least…when Anubis was in the right mood for it. The virile crocodile god could be quite a lot to deal with and the jackal god needed enough mental energy to properly spend time with him.

The hungry gaze Sobek was fixing him with as he guided you away and out of the library made Anubis’s hackles raise. Despite maintaining the stoic expression on his face, he didn’t like the look his cousin was giving you. Whether it meant he was interested in having you in his bed like another of his consorts or whether he thought that was what Anubis’s intentions were.

Tilting his snout up at the crocodile god, Anubis made his way out of the library, still holding you gently by the hand.

But Anubis did not lead you back to the Hall of Truth. You were still too lost to enter the Underworld. His job was to still guide you.

So, instead, he decided to take you outside to the River of Stars.

You were confused, but you allowed him to take you. The divine realm was such a marvelous place. Going from the brightest and warmest day in the atrium of the persea tree to the coolest and clearest night, the sky dotted with scattered diamonds and clouds of the universe.

And before you was the clearest river you had ever seen, reflecting the night sky infinitely and forever.

You could get lost in the depths of its beauty eternally, but Anubis was kind enough to direct your attention away so that you didn’t. His black fur blended in so well with the darkness surrounding the two of you that the only thing that stood out was his bright yellow eyes.

Eyes that held you warmly. And kindly. “May I speak freely, (Name)?”

You nodded.

Letting out a heavy sigh, Anubis kept a hold on your hand. “It does not matter where you came from.” He said quietly. “Your parentage does not determine who you are. And it is no fault of yours for the sins of your parents.”

You swallowed, looking down at your hand. “For my mother laying with another man…”

“No.” Anubis replied firmly, reaching to brush your face with a finger, gently tilting your face up to meet his gaze with a claw. “For your father’s betrayal.”

You were confused. You shook your head. “But he’s not my father. Your goddess said so.”

“He may not be by blood, but he was by virtue.” Anubis insisted, his voice firm but still kind. There was a wisdom and weight to his words as he spoke to you. “He raised you. He took the role as your father and it is he who was responsible to you. He killed you for actions that were not your own. You were innocent. A victim. Your father betrayed you by allowing his anger to cloud his judgement and then murdered his daughter. The woman he had raised since birth. It was your father that committed a great sin. I am certain that when he meets his end, his heart will be devoured. I cannot imagine that his heart will weigh lighter than the feather. After all, no mortal can bluff my Scales.”

Every word he spoke, you held onto. It was as if the kindness he treated you with was keeping you warm in the cool nightscape that stretched around you infinitely. No man had ever looked at you the way he did. It made you feel warm in ways you had never known and the casual physical intimacy only made you feel even warmer.

You glanced away, smiling softly. “You’re…very kind, My Lord.”

Anubis hummed in idle amusement. “I am the God of Death.” He replied matter-of-factly. “It is my duty to be kind. To be fair. To be gentle. I am a guide. It would not bode well for my work if I weren’t so.”

What a surprisingly humble god. You couldn’t help but chuckle. “I don’t think it’s just your duty.” You remarked. “You just…have a calm energy. It’s part of who you are. Even if who you are is your duty. You would have to be fit for the job to have it to begin with, wouldn’t you?”

How insightful. For someone as innocent and lost as you were, you were surprisingly wise. “I suppose you’re right.”

A moment of quiet stretched between you two, admiring the divine scenery before you. Anubis had much he wanted to say, but couldn’t. He empathized with you and you were still lost…perhaps what you needed was a companion.

Someone who understood.

“Gods are not immune to acts of sin.” Anubis admitted, still holding your hand in his.

You tilted your head at the black jackal god curiously. “Pardon?”

His ear flicked in your direction, glancing back to you with his bright eyes. “Gods.” He repeated. “We are not immune to sinful and unjust actions.” Perhaps he was biased, but…he had his own story to tell. “Osiris is my father, but His wife was not my birth mother. Nephthys was the woman who birthed me. Set’s wife. She disguised herself as Isis and tricked Him into laying with her. So, she gave birth to me and then abandoned me. She was…fearful of what her husband would do if he discovered her betrayal. So, she abandoned me as a babe.

“But Isis did discover the truth, and…she took me. Raised me as her son. There was no judgement. None. She did not blame myself nor Osiris. Nor did she persecute Nephthys for what she had done. She only took me and raised me as her son. Without discrimination or treating me any differently. As far as I’m concerned, she is my mother. She voluntarily took the role.

“Set, however…did discover the truth.” Anubis lamented, shaking his head. “It’s part of the reason he killed Osiris. Granted, Set was always resentful of his brother, but that’s beside the point. My mother…being the loving and devoted goddess she was…searched for Osiris’s body and found Him. She brought Him back to life long enough for her to have His son. My younger brother, Horus the Younger, God of the Sun and Patron God of the Pharaoh. Not to be confused with Horus the Elder, Set and Osiris’s brother and God of the Sky. My mother did not raise him the way she raised me. She raised my brother Horus at a distance for his safety, only allowing him to return once he was grown. But my father could not stay in the world of the living, and so moved on and became king of the Underworld. So, it became my duty to guard His tomb and His sarcophagus.

“After some time, my brother Horus, now grown, wound up defeating Set.” Anubis leaned back. “He was banished from the land for the chaos he had unleashed, and my brother and my mother ruled over the land until their deaths.”

You listened intently. You weren’t entirely sure if it was common for Anubis to get personal like this. Sure, you’ve heard some of these stories and more yourself. But it was…different getting it like this. It was different hearing these stories from Anubis’s perspective. But a soft smile crept on your face as you listened. “Your mother sounds like a very kind woman.”

It was such an…oddly mundane compliment. Many who worshipped his mother often complimented her beauty and her grace. They only ever saw her as a towering goddess. Yes, she was a goddess of many things good and benevolent, they saw her as that. A goddess.

But you…spoke about her like she was an ordinary person. And you said it so softly. So genuinely. Anubis couldn’t help but smile at you. “I’m sure she would appreciate the compliment.”

Another moment of quiet stretched between you. Anubis wasn’t going to be the first to end it. After all, he was guiding you. You were the one who was in charge. You would know when you were ready to go.

He could sense your hesitance as you spoke up. “Do…we have to go back soon?” You asked timidly.

The God of Death wasn’t about to deny you his presence. Whether that was out of necessity or just because he found your company pleasant, he wasn’t quite sure. But regardless, he was at your mercy. At your beck and call. “You can stay as long as you need to before you’re ready to move on.” He said gently to you. “I’m here for as long as you need me to be.”

For hours, you talked. Just engaged in idle conversation. Learning more about each other. But more and more, Anubis was realizing his mistake. He shouldn’t be getting so personal and attached to you, but…he couldn’t help it. And besides. You were already here in the afterlife. It wasn’t like you had anything to go back to.

And here, time was meaningless. In the realm of the divine, the past, present, and future all existed at once. Souls poured in by the hundreds, but every single one got their own Weighing of the Heart and Soul specifically because time did not flow here as it did in the living world. So, even if Anubis were to be absent, he wouldn’t be late. He wouldn’t be neglecting anyone.

Besides…he couldn’t remember being so enamoured with someone since Anubis first married Anput, sister to King Narmer. Qebhet’s mother. The woman had long since passed on into the afterlife while Qebhet stayed with her father, serving as a guide to spirits and leading them to the Hall of Truth just as Anubis was a guide to the lost. It made him incredibly proud to have such a wonderful daughter to a wonderful woman.

And when he spoke with you and spent time with you…you reminded him of her. In the sense that you stirred the same feelings Anput once did. And in doing so, made him realize just how painfully lonely he had been.

Time had no meaning in this world, and you wanted to go back to the library. After all, if there was still time before passing on into the Afterlife, it was only fair to enjoy the time before. Expanding one’s knowledge in the most comprehensive cosmic library that existed.

But while you were buried in the books, Anubis was focused on you. He was taking in all of your subtleties in your existence. The way your brows furrowed and your lips pursed when you concentrated, the way you held the next page before you would turn it, how easily your thoughts could be read on your face. He found it all incredibly fascinating.

And it seemed he wasn’t exactly being all too subtle about it.

“It is not like you to stay at such a distance, brother.” A familiar voice said from beside Anubis, just out of earshot of you.

Raising an eyebrow at the falcon god, the jackal god gave him a polite and welcoming nod. “And it isn’t like you to approach first, Horus.”

His brother chuckled warmly. “Well, one’s nature is never static. The nature of life is change, after all.”

“Hm.” Was all Anubis could offer in response. Just a noncommittal hum. But…he was curious as to why he had his brother’s attention. “What prompted you to speak first?” He asked, raising an eyebrow at Horus. “Come to tell me to stop hovering and keep her company?”

“Actually, the opposite.” Horus replied, a note of worry in his tone. “I know how easy it can be to get…attached. But you must keep impartial. Ties are for things that last, and if you attach to something that won’t, you will only find yourself clerically compromised. And your duty must come first, brother.”

Not exactly the pinnacle of comfort or assurance. But…perhaps Horus was right. Anubis was a god in the Hall of Truth. When he had Qebhet, he was serving the mortals of the living world. This was not that. He had a duty and meeting you at your Weighing was not a recipe for a long-lasting relationship.

Though Anubis would never admit that he was entertaining the idea.

“Perhaps you are right, Horus…” He replied quietly, a bit more sombrely than he intended it to come out as he walked away, weaving through the bookshelves to put some distance between himself and you. As well as himself and Horus.

He took a seat at a nearby table. Not so far that he couldn’t see you, but far enough that his presence wouldn’t be felt by you. Perhaps it was for the best…mortals were temporary. And once you crossed over, he would not be able to see you, there. After all, Anubis’s duty was to guide souls into the Afterlife, not to oversee it.

That was his father’s job.

The god of death’s contemplation would soon be tainted by a familiar abrasive one. “Your hunger is pungent, cousin.” The rumble of the virile god announced the sperm lord’s presence quite loudly despite his hushed voice as he took a seat next to Anubis. “It is unfit for a god with an interest such as yourself to keep yourself at such a distance from your quarry.”

The jackal couldn’t help but crinkle his brow in disgust. “She is not a morsel to be devoured, Sobek.” He retorted in defense of your dignity. “(Name) is an individual deserving of respect and love.”

“Yes, yes. A morsel can be devoured respectfully and lovingly, cousin. The two things do not have to be mutually exclusive.” The crocodile god retorted. Anubis often forgot just how hedonistically Sobek expressed his virile nature. What a headache… “But why hold back? Why deny yourself of the pleasure of laying with a woman you find so pleasant?”

“Because I have a duty to guide the lost.” Anubis replied flatly. “Laying with a woman who has already passed her Weighing and needs only to be guided would not accomplish that.” Why was he having this conversation with Sobek? It wasn’t like the crocodile was very emotionally adept. But…the conversation did help at least a bit. Or perhaps Anubis just forgot how much he missed in-depth conversations. Even with someone he found a bit much. “Besides…it isn’t just about myself. I also have to think about what’s best for (Name). I see no joy in laying with a woman only to have to say goodbye soonafter for the last time.”

The crocodile god chuckled in amusement, tracing his claw over the cover of a stray book. “All the more reason to lay with her, cousin.” Sobek said. “After all, think about the regret you’ll both feel if you do not take the opportunity while it was presented to you and for it to slip away through your fingertips forever. Life is meant to be seized. Why purposefully deny yourself these pleasures?”

Getting up, Anubis sighed a controlled breath through his snout and turned to walk away. “The pleasure is not worth breaking her heart…”

Ironically, Sobek’s words only strengthened Anubis’s resolve. He would not break your heart. It was not what you deserved and the god of death would not curse you in such a way. But…would it curse you more to force you to live without ever feeling his touch? His affection?

No matter. He would not. Horus was right. And Anubis would heed his younger brother’s words over his cousin’s.

But it wouldn’t be until attempting to leave the library to clear his head that there would be the faintest flutter in his heart. Anubis had nearly bumped into his daughter and he had to take a moment not to be hasty. He was feeling…quite emotional and erratic as well.

Qebhet didn’t seem to notice, however. And the sight of her made the god of death’s heart melt like a pound of butter. She was the product of the last mortal woman he’d loved…and he didn’t regret his relationship with Anput for a moment. And his daughter? He would never regret having her.

And it seemed that the shimmering serpent goddess was far more perceptive than her father would anticipate. “Does she make you happy, father?”

Anubis blinked at Qebhet for a moment, ears swivelled curiously. She must have overheard some parts of his conversation with Sobek. But…he couldn’t be sure. “What?”

“(Name).” She clarified with a calm smile. “Does she make you happy?”

“I-” The jackal god’s breath hitched in his throat. His brother and his cousin offered him council and advice for what to do. How to act upon what they assumed was what his feelings were. But Qebhet…was the first who actually asked about his feelings. Not what to do about them. But how he felt.

And like his Scales, he couldn’t lie to his daughter. “Yes.” He admitted, a small smile playing at his canine features. “She does.”

Nodding Qebhet walked past him. “Then that’s all that matters.”

It wasn’t often that the patron of the lost was left listless himself. It simply wasn’t something that happened. And yet, here he was. Completely at a loss. Now, he didn’t know. He knew how he felt. He knew that he wanted to do what was best for you. But now he didn’t actually know what that meant. All he knew was that you made him happy and that soon enough, you would have to say goodbye.

Who could he go to for advice? For solace? Who would know best about love and happiness?

He knew. Of course Anubis knew. Who else would he ask but his own mother?

Making his way back to the Hall of Truth, Anubis spotted his parents in a deep discussion. He paid no mind, however. Simply cleared his throat to get their attention. “Mother?” He pried gently, trying his best not to appear submissive or fearful. “May we speak?”

She did not even hesitate before excusing herself from Osiris, the King looking at Anubis pointedly before walking away to speak with the other gods.

Calmly, the woman took her son by the arm and walked with him. “What troubles you, dear?” Isis asked him.

How could he even explain? It was different with Anput. He was on the mortal realm, guarding Osiris’s tomb while she was alive. But this was different. You were a soul who was due to depart soon. There was…nothing that could happen between you. But he wanted something. And he wanted it badly. “How does one sever an attachment that shouldn’t have been made to begin with?”

Isis was no fool. Anubis couldn’t trick her with vagueries. “Now, why do you ask such a thing?” She knew the answer, but she wanted her son to say it outright. To not hide his true feelings.

Sighing, Anubis looked away from his mother. Almost in shame. “I fear…I may have attached too closely to a soul.” He admitted out loud, finally. “And I know that there is no future between us. I know that it isn’t…part of our customs or traditions. And I know that she will have to leave very soon. It wouldn’t be right to ask her to remain lost just for my sake…”

“Son.” Isis interjected firmly, forcing the god of death to look her way. “Anubis…you know better than most that time is fleeting. That life is a march towards death. It is its destination. You know that this is what awaits every soul.”

He knew this. He knew this deeply. He knew it was wrong to feel this way about you.

“That being said…you cannot control how you feel about anyone.” She continued. “So if you know everything that you know, given everything that you do for your divine life’s work…what do you want out of this?” Isis finally asked him. “To hold fast to your duties and deny yourself a moment of joy? Or to indulge in your happiness, even if it’s fleeting? There is no incorrect answer. It’s not a matter of right and wrong. It’s a matter of what you’re willing to sacrifice. What you’re willing to risk. If your choice will be worth the consequences. That is all.”

At last. A moment of clarity. One that did not come from a place of assuming what he wanted or felt. But asked him to consider his emotions and what actions he was willing to take for them. It was true, being earnest with his feelings with you would lead to an incredibly bittersweet goodbye. One that would live with him until the end of time itself.

But…if it was what you both wanted, then…shouldn’t you get to enjoy what little time you both have together? If you wanted it…then shouldn’t he ask? At the very least.

At least if you said no…then he wouldn’t have to worry. There wouldn’t be any misunderstandings or hang ups. He could simply do his duty and guide you into the afterlife. And then move on, forever holding onto the memory of how fond he was of you when he had you.

Sighing, Anubis had finally made his decision, unlinking his arm from Isis’s. “Thank you…mother.” He said quietly to her, ears hung to the sides as he avoided her gaze. “My decision is…clearer, now.”

“Good.” She said, reaching forward to cradle her son’s canine face in her hands. “So long as it’s a choice you’re at peace with…that’s all that matters. I trust your judgement. We all do. So…don’t forget to trust yourself, my son.”

Letting Isis gently kiss him on the forehead, Anubis pulled away, a contented expression on his face. “I won’t, mother.”

And with that, he made his way back to the library, intent on making his feelings known to you. But not there…somewhere more appropriate. More discreet.

More…private.

You, on the other hand, were completely unaware of the inner turmoil that Anubis was enduring. You were far too busy engrossing yourself in the knowledge provided to you in the library. So many tomes and scrolls to trawl through. And unlike being in the mortal world, you had time to read through them. Mostly because time didn’t really exist in a physical sense. Everything was sort of technically happening at once and after a little while, you got used to how time flowed.

Though, while you observed the many gods that populated the Egyptian pantheon coming in and out of the library, you wondered where Anubis was. He wouldn’t abandon you. You knew that for certain. He was your guide, though you couldn’t help but be…endeared to him. You knew that your time together was short, and even now, you knew that you were less and less lost. But you couldn’t help but imagine what coupling with him would be like.

Of course, you could never be. Not long-term. Certainly not to have a daughter like Qebhet, that was for certain. But you could pretend. At least for the moment that such a thing was possible in your circumstances.

Sometime later, the jackal god finally approached you, his calm presence washing over you as he gazed down at you so kindly with golden eyes. “Sorry for taking so long, (Name).” He apologized, bowing before extending a hand to you. “I had some…important matters I needed to attend to.”

He sounded shy, so, naturally, you raised your eyebrows at him. “Oh? What sort of important matters?”

Anubis chuckled through his nose. “Nothing grievous, I assure you.” He promised, taking your hand in his and lifting you from your seat. “Actually, said business is what I would like to speak to you about, now.” Oh? Now, that caught your interest. Or…perhaps he was getting ready to take you to the Underworld. Perhaps it was finally time to move on.

A pity…but perhaps you had spent enough time coming to terms with your afterlife and what had happened to land you here. You had no guilt. You had no regrets. You were ready. “Is it?” You asked, tentatively.

“Yes.” Anubis said, still not moving to walk away. “Would you join me, (Name)?” You tried not to be influenced or read too much into his tone, but the way he so sweetly said your name every time made your chest flutter. As if he wanted to savour how it tasted.

“Of course.” You replied without hesitation, allowing the god of death to lead you wherever he wished to lead you.

Soon enough, you arrived at a room. Long doors greeted you and it was only when you passed the Hall of Truth that you realized that Anubis was not taking you to move on. So…for what purpose did he guide you here?

As Anubis opened the doors, your gaze fell upon how the room was decorated. It was rather…modest. Simple. It was a dark-coloured room, almost black, but it was decorated rather plainly. Bureaus and shelves and the like. The fanciest thing in it was the lavish bed with black silks decorated with gold thread trims. The bed itself was surrounded by black translucent gossamer curtains.

It was…beautiful. It just about took your breath away. And your mind was dancing with all the possibilities of what he could be asking you to for. “This…isn’t the Hall of Truth.” You said very conspicuously.

“No. It is not.” Anubis responded equally as plainly as he had you sit on the edge of the bed where the curtains parted, your hand still in his as he sat beside you, his head hanging low. “This is…my room. My quarters.”

That much was obvious to you. But the answer as to why was still escaping you at this very moment. It likely should have been obvious, but you did not want to be presumptuous. You did not want to be improper or inappropriate. So, you opted to just have it told to you. “Why did you bring me here?” You asked, wanting the answers, already.

Noting how much of a deep breath he was taking, you stilled yourself. For Anubis to be so laboured while speaking to you…it must be important. You dared not interrupt him. “I…I have grown quite fond of you, (Name).” He said, making your heart skip a beat for a moment. The god of death was…fond of you? You in particular? “I know that I have a duty to guide you across. To guide you into the afterlife into the Underworld ruled by my father. And it is a duty I will perform. It cannot be undone or reversed.”

He swallowed, adjusting his golden collar for a moment. It was rather cute to see him so shy, all of a sudden. “But I know in my heart that I would feel an eternal regret if I were not honest. If I…did not ask. Though the time we have left is limited and fleeting…I wanted to know if you were…fond of me, too.”

You held your tongue for a moment, considering your options. Considering the consequences of your answers and your decisions. You knew that after this, you would move on into the afterlife. There was no escaping or prolonging it. You could not have a long-term relationship with Anubis. That simply wasn’t possible.

So knowing that…were you willing to part with him without him knowing that you feel the same way? Were you willing to forego everything you could have, for this one moment and one moment alone?

No. No, you weren’t. You would surely regret it for eternity if you did.

Squeezing his hand, you looked up to him and reached up, cupping the jackal god’s cheek and craning his face to look at you directly before pulling him down to kiss his forehead. “I am.” You replied softly, easily. As easily as breathing, even. “I’m very fond of you, My Lord.”

Smiling sheepishly at you, Anubis blinked for a moment. He wasn’t quite sure how to respond. He didn’t expect you to accept so easily. But you did, and he wasn’t going to ruin that. Gently guiding you to sit in his lap, the god of death shuffled back into the bed, concealing yourselves behind the gossamer curtains to obscure you from view. Your hand was still in his as his other rested on your lower back.

Once he was comfortable, he sighed. You could feel his chest rising and falling with his breathing and this position he had you in made your desires and anticipation grow. The tension began to permeate the very air you and Anubis breathed, looking down on him and waiting for him to speak, next.

Thankfully, you didn’t have to wait long. “If you truly mean that…then you surely know that there is no time left. Soon, you will be ready to depart forever.” The reality felt like a lump in your throat. But still, you didn’t let that deter you. “And since that is the truth of the matter…then I must ask you…would you like to couple with me? Right here and now?” The question made a delightful shudder crawl over your skin as you sat there. Anubis was averting his gaze from you, hiding his shyness and his embarrassment. “I know you’ve never…coupled with anyone, before. So I just wanted to be sure I wasn’t crossing any b-boundaries. I respect and care for you in abundance, s-so -”

Silencing him with your movement, you took his hand and placed it on your clothed chest. That should be answer enough for him, but in case he still didn’t get it, you squeezed his hand around your breast just to be clear.

You wanted this. You wanted him.

And looking up at you, Anubis visibly swallowed, gently squeezing the flesh in his hand of his own accord this time. Softly, the hand still on the small of your back moved to grab a hold of your waist, rolling his hips up against you with a soft sigh through his doggish snout. A smile as warm and radiant as Ra’s sun adorned his face, golden eyes just the same as he looked up at you. “Of course, (Name).” He replied affectionately, thumb tracing over your skin where he was holding you. “I will be gentle with you. I will be attentive and caring. And I will ensure that no part of you is untouched and unappreciated to its fullest potential, my dear (Name).”

Feeling him through the fabric of your clothes, you grew a little apprehensive. You knew he was telling the truth, but it was still nervewracking. You had never done this, before, and your inexperience was imparting you with a little sense of performance anxiety.

But you could see that Anubis was equally as apprehensive. He didn’t want to hurt you or make the experience unpleasant. So, you leaned forward and held his face, attempting to kiss him. You hoped that easing his worries would help quell yours as well.

And you were right, it helped him feel much more comfortable, angling his face to help you properly kiss. Even with his canine snout. Your lips were so soft, so pliant. It was such an innocent gesture despite the circumstances they were in, so Anubis decided to add a little more passion to the action, sliding his soft tongue along your lip to ask your permission. All the while, rolling his hips against yours and gently squeezing your thigh.

It took you a little by surprise, but it wasn’t unpleasant. So, you allowed the god of death to slip his tongue into your mouth, eliciting a soft moan from you. Your hips began to move of their own accord against him, feeling his erection straining under the cloth on his waist.

The anticipation was growing in the both of you, only flimsy layers of cloth keeping you separated. But Anubis refused to rush this. He wanted to take his time with you and savour this moment. Continuing to kiss you sensually and roll his hips against yours, the jackal god slipped your robes off of your shoulders, leaving you bare-chested for him.

His soft gentle hands on your breasts made you keen, your voice unobstructed when his lips were removed from yours, instead leaving lingering and gingerly placed kisses on your untouched neck. You had never physically been with anyone like this, so your whole body was sensitive.

And you were both quickly discovering just how vocal you were.

All of Anubis’s efforts right now were to help you relax. To help you loosen up and be more confident in yourself. He was experienced enough, but you weren’t. And he had every intention of taking care of you. So, he would make sure to take his time to prepare you. Making you feel good long before the actual coupling would begin, and opening you up.

The soft needy sounds you were making when he licked a warm wet tongue along your nipple was evidence enough that he was doing his intended job. As was your more insistent grinding against his clothed loins.

It felt good. Your chest was so sensitive from not having been touched and you shivered when you felt his voice reverberate against your flesh. Anubis rolled your other nipple between his deft fingers and feeling his erection against your entrance was only spurring you more and more onward. But he wouldn’t let you have it, not yet. He was so gentle and attentive with you. It didn’t matter how impatient you were getting.

As long as he held you in his hands, you didn’t care how long it would take for him to properly take you.

Soon enough, Anubis had detached from your stimulated and perked nipples and carefully maneuvered you, you of course whining at the loss of friction with him. But, he had different plans. Ones you could surmise when he lifted your hips up and allowed you to rest your legs over his shoulders.

The way he curiously looked at what lay beneath the cloth barely covering your wet slit had you blushing madly. Especially when he licked his lips like that. Anubis really did look like a hungry predator sizing you up for a meal when he had you like this.

But his gaze remained ever gentle as he softly brushed aside the fabric, gingerly blowing on the soft mound of flesh before his eyes. So soft…so wet.

So ripe to taste.

You looked up at him tepidly, waiting for him to act on his own accord when you realized that he was holding your gaze to ask for your permission.

Nodding up, you stroked his cheek, affectionately letting him know you were okay. “Go ahead…I trust you.”

Gratefully, Anubis took your hand in his and kissed the inside of your palm before kissing the inside of your thigh as well. “Thank you, (Name).” The way your name slid off of his tongue had you shivering in the god’s grasp.

Softly, he nuzzled you, warm breath washing over you before he gave a lick through your folds. The gesture had you throwing your head back and sighing contentedly.

Your sounds of pleasure only increased in volume when he decided to take initiative and began to lap at you with more vigour. His wet, flat, round tongue was warm against you and every lap made you involuntarily roll your hips against his face. Soft sighs and moans spilled from your lips as you laid back against his stomach. As your face hung down, you couldn’t help but glance to the side at the tent pitched against his cloth.

Anubis was far too lost in your taste to notice what you were doing. He squeezed at your legs while his tongue swiped over every inch of you, pressing up against your most sensitive spots inside of you while running over your clit. He made sure not to get too locked into a single point. He wanted you to feel good, but he also didn’t want this to be boring.

He also didn’t want to get you to climax too soon. He just wanted to soften you up and get you prepared to take him. Just so that he wouldn’t hurt you. Anubis didn’t spend all this time bonding and getting attached to you just to break you. You meant far too much for him to just destroy with carnal desires.

He was not his cousin Sobek, after all.

You, however, couldn’t help but be curious. So, while Anubis was busy pleasuring you with his canine mouth, you pulled off the cloth. You wanted to know what he was going to put in you.

And surprised you were.

Truth be told, you weren’t quite sure what you were expecting. Certainly not something like this. His member radiated heat, so much so that even being close to it was drawing you to it if its strangely alluring musty scent didn’t. The tip was tapered to a point and at the base was a bulbous bulb.

It was unlike anything you had ever experience, before.

So, naturally, you began to take him into your mouth.

For a moment, Anubis was far too enthralled with your taste and your scent, groaning into your cunt as he lapped up everything that was quickly beginning to leak out of you. But as soon as he felt your lips wrap around his cock, he shuddered with a growl. Looking down at you, he couldn’t help but melt at the way you looked, neck craned so you could take him. It was tepid, at first, and your teeth were scraping his sensitive flesh a little bit.

But he wasn’t angry. You were inexperienced, after all.

So, the god of death simply reached down and gently cupped your face, getting your attention. “T-teeth…” He cautioned slowly. “Open your mouth wider…and b-be mindful of the t-teeth.”

Nodding, you heeded his advice. This was a first for you, after all. You didn’t want to disappoint him.

As you began to take him deeper into your throat, Anubis began to let out small growls. Your mouth felt so good, his knot bumping against your lips. He began to shallowly thrust against your face while he went back to eating you out. It was a rhythmic movement, being performed more instinctually rather than consciously. It was almost lulling, in a way.

But he couldn’t allow himself to lose himself. The last thing he wanted was to accidentally orally knot you. He wouldn’t be able to pull you off of him for hours if that happened. He wanted to finish inside of you, but not like that.

Soon enough, when he was beginning to grow impatient, he upped the ante as well. You were whining and moaning around his cock, the vibrations only spurring him on. Anubis loved feeling your voice vibrate against him like this and he couldn’t help but groan deeply as he sucked on your swollen and puffed pussy.

Something which you felt just as deeply as you continued to suckle on him, massaging his knot with your hand while you took him in. You were just as enthused and excited as he was. Once the nervousness of this being your first wore off, you got into it quite easily.

It also helped that it was Anubis himself, the god who was so kind and patient and sweet to you. You couldn’t imagine anyone else being your first.

But eventually, the god of death had to exercise restraint and pulled you off of his cock, panting and breathing heavily as though he were drowning in you. Something he was more than happy to do.

Time was running short, however. They couldn’t do this forever. After this, Anubis needed to guide you to the afterlife. To the Underworld. So, they needed to finish this. “Lay down.”

You tried to do what he asked, but he ended up simply grabbing you and maneuvering you the way he wanted you. “Like this, (Name).” He reiterated, guiding you to straddle him and then pulling you into his chest to cradle you.

As you laid there, your body felt tense once more. You were once again hit with performance anxiety, not really sure what to do with yourself in this position. All you could tell was that you liked this. You liked being in his arms like this. And you liked feeling the heat radiating off of his cock so close to your cunt. It was teasing in a way.

Anubis could sense your apprehension and ran a hand through your hair to soothe you. “Shhhh…relax, (Name). Just relax…” He cooed at you quietly, tilting his head down to kiss you on the forehead. “I’ll take care of you.”

Listening to his advice, you did as he asked. You took in a deep breath and let it out, allowing yourself to go slack against his body as he held you there. While he held you, he continued to stroke comforting strokes along your back and through your hair.

Until he took a gentle hold of your ass and lifted you up slightly, pressing the tip of his cock into your entrance and slowly sinking you down onto him. You hissed through your teeth. You had never felt anything like this, before. The sensation of being filled like this was completely knew. It hurt a little bit, being stretched like this. But Anubis continued to stroke your back and kiss you sweetly, easing you into it. “Easy…relax. I’ve got you…just let yourself slip into it.” He cooed at you, resting his forehead against yours.

Soon enough, you sank down onto his length, the lips of your pussy pressed flush against his swollen knot. He did not move just yet. Didn’t dare until he was sure you were settled onto his size. He continued to kiss you up and down your neck and your jaw, helping you relax even further into the position.

Once he was sure you were settled, he cupped your face and stared into your eyes. “I’m going to start moving, (Name).” He told you. “You let me know if it’s too much or too little. Or if you want to stop entirely, and it will stop. Alright?”

Practically turning into a puddle at just how careful and considerate he was being with you, you nodded at him, leaning forward to kiss his snout. “Alright.”

Sighing at the permission you gave him, Anubis pulled you forward to nestle your head under his chin. One arm was draped across your back, the other hand holding onto your ass for leverage. Digging his heels into the bed beneath you, he began to softly thrust up into you. Fuck, you were so warm and tight around him. Even with him preparing you and being careful with you, you were still a little apprehensive. He expected it and hoped you would loosen once you got into the rhythm of this.

And if not, he was prepared to pull out and stop all of this immediately. You were far more important than primal desires.

With shallow thrusts, you were sighing and whining contentedly. Anubis had you in his arms protectively, being slow and careful with you while he was thrusting up into you. Your warmth was wrapped tightly around him and had you not already pleasured him with your mouth, he likely wouldn’t be as sensitive right now.

But already, he was growing close to cumming. He wouldn’t. Not until you were going to. But he could feel how close he was getting.

Every bump if his knot against your entrance pushed a little gasp out of you. It felt…good. It felt very good. You could feel how deep he was reaching, but despite how much of you he was filling up, you still felt oddly empty. Like you knew you could take more of him.

You wanted to take more of him.

In time with his thrusts, you began to push back against him, grinding your cunt against his knot. An action that made him throw his head back with a growl-edged sigh. “Fuck, (Name)…” He muttered, giving your ass a squeeze before beginning to pull you down harder onto him. Not by a lot, but just enough to show you how eager he was to fuck you. How happy he was to be inside of you.

How much he was looking forward to filling you with his holy seed.

After a little while, when it was obvious that your discomfort and apprehension was melting away, Anubis allowed himself to thrust much more earnestly into you. His knot was slapping against your entrance wetly, your little whines and whimpers becoming music to the god’s ears. Your pleasure was his symphony, every word of approval and encouragement spurring him on as he held onto you tightly.

Meanwhile, you were an absolute mess on his cock, held against the god’s chest. The more and more he fucked you like this, the more and more you wanted him deeper inside of you. He was winding you up before with his tongue, but this was much different. Your entire core was tightening around him. You had never felt anything like this, but you felt like you were soon going to be close to bursting.

A fact you made very clear to him as you were very quickly losing control of yourself. “A-Anubis!” You cried out his name. “I-I think I’m c-close! N-need you…!”

In that moment of you begging for him, calling out for him, the god’s primal instincts finally took over. In a second, Anubis flipped you over, your knees over his shoulders as he adjusted himself. His golden eyes were intensely locked onto yours.

In an instant, he lunged forward and captured your lips with his, slithering his tongue inside of your mouth while he began to plunge into you desperately. He was chasing his high, knowing you were chasing it with him, and soon enough he was practically jackhammering into you. The sounds of his knot slapping against you echoed around the room incredibly rapidly.

Your arms were wrapped tightly around him while he kissed you and fucked you fervently. This was a much deeper angle than he had you in before. You could feel him reaching deeper, now.

But still…it wasn’t enough for you to be satisfied. But Anubis was hitting you just deep enough to push you closer and closer to the edge, desperately chasing his climax.

Your whines were practically being swallowed by his mouth, you tightening more and more around him the closer and closer you got to your orgasm.

Something which was making his desperation more and more frantic. He wanted to knot you. Needed to knot you. To join you together and fill you with his seed in a way that would seal you together until you were ready to leave. The sheer force he was slamming into you with had you seeing stars. You were completely at his mercy, helpless to the onslaught of pleasure and desperation.

Until finally, the cord in you snapped, and you were left spasming in his arms.

But he wasn’t finished. Anubis needed to properly mate you, but thankfully, he was growing close. He was whining just as much and as loudly as you were.

As you broke the kiss to catch your breath and cry out loudly without obstruction, Anubis slammed his cock into you as hard as he could while you were fluttering around him.

Until finally – finally – the knot slipped in and you constricted around him, tightening and squeezing him while he was still humping and grinding into you.

Finally, with a deep guttural growl, you could feel him expand inside you, reaching as deep as you finally needed him to reach, and you could feel his hot semen splashing your insides. The head had penetrated your cervix and was spraying holy cum inside of your womb. Nothing would come of it, but the warmth spread through you and each throb and pulse of his cock helped bring the both of you down from your shared high.

Panting as Anubis’s head slumped against your chest, he released your legs from off of his shoulders and allowed you to relax while you continued to cum.

Carefully, noting how much you seemed to like the position, the god of death rolled you both over – still connected by his knot holding you both together – and simply held you against his chest as you came down, basking in the afterglow of your climaxes. Just as he did before, he stroked your back and your hair, the both of you panting heavily. He hadn’t meant for this to be so…intense. But the instinct had taken over him and you really wanted him.

So, he didn’t let the inner feelings of guilt seep in. Not when you were so blissed out on top of him.

“That was…” You breathed out, head nestled underneath Anubis’s chin while he held you in his arms, cock still steadily pulsing inside of you, holding you in place. There was something so intimate about it that you couldn’t help but like. Like he wasn’t ready to let go of you, yet. “Incredible…”

With a doggish grunt, Anubis leaned down and kissed your forehead. “I’m glad…” He murmured, warmth blooming in his chest with you on it. You were tired. It would be a long while until the god’s knot would go down. So, he decided you needed your rest.

So, he guided your head to listen to his heartbeat and leaned his head back, sighing as he continued to gently stroke you while you bathed in the calmness of post-coitus.

It wasn’t time for goodbye, yet. His cock would let go of you when it was ready to. For now, you could doze peacefully.

Though as much as he wished he could keep you were forever, he couldn’t. Anubis knew what was to come. What his duty was. And he had to fulfill it.

Osiris waited by the entrance to the Underworld in the Hall of Truth. Many other souls weighed by Anubis at different times in different places passed through the entrance. Time didn’t flow in the realm of the divine as it did in the realm of mortals. Everything happened at once. Including His son’s coupling with you.

Thankfully, when you both arrived, you were decent. Though, Osiris wasn’t a fool. He knew as well as you both did that this was always meant to be temporary.

And now was time for you to say your goodbyes.

Osiris was proud of His son for still remaining devoted to his duty. Though, He couldn’t deny that the ache wasn’t there when He saw the both of you before Him.

Nodding at Anubis, He allowed His son to say one last goodbye to you before you would pass into the Underworld.

You couldn’t help but feel the sadness wash over you as you walked through the Hall of Truth. You knew this was your destination, but somehow you still weren’t prepared for the finality of it all. But Anubis was as calm as he always was, even standing before his Father.

So, you were, too. You asked yourself on the way here if you regretted the short-lived relationship you had built with Anubis. And every time you asked, the answer was always ‘no.’

The god of death would always live on in your heart.

As you stood before the entrance to the Underworld, you looked back to Anubis. He looked just as pained to see you go, but knew you had to.

Reaching out to you, Anubis took your hand in his and kissed your knuckles. “I know our time together was always meant to be brief…” He prefaced, ears folded against his face. “But…I’m glad we took advantage of it all. I don’t regret a moment, (Name). Even knowing that goodbye would be this painful, I would do it all over again. Over and over again.”

Smiling up at the genuine shared sentiment, you couldn’t help but reach out and pull the god’s face towards you, planting a soft kiss on his lips. “I know…” You said to him softly. “And I would do it all over again, too. If it meant I would get to share this bond with you.”

Staring at you for a moment longer, Anubis couldn’t help himself and pulled you into a deeper more passionate kiss. One that his Father respectfully looked away from.

Breaking away, Anubis held your face there for a moment longer. “And you’re sure you’re ready…?”

You nodded, more sure now than you were before. “I am.”

So…that was that, then. Nodding and resigning himself to this face, Anubis rested his forehead against yours. “Safe travels, (Name).” He murmured sweetly to you. “A new life beyond awaits you.”

Painfully, you let him go, turning away from him before stepping towards the entrance to the Underworld. Once you passed through, there was no going back. This was it.

You were ready for this to be your final moment.

Taking a deep breath, you were gone in only a few footsteps.

Once you were gone, Anubis let out a shaky breath, allowing himself to appear vulnerable in front of his Father. He was half expecting Osiris to punish Anubis for allowing himself to become so attached to a mortal soul.

But instead, the King simply held Anubis close, hand firmly on his shoulder. “I know that was hard…but I’m proud of you, my son.”

Hearing that from him, after all the doubt that Anubis had been grappling with this whole time since knowing you, he let himself cry at your loss. He let himself grieve for a moment for the relationship you two could never have. The relationship you did foster. And the time you would no longer have.

But it was done. He had his duty and you had to move on. You both knew this. It would dishonour your memory to focus only on the bittersweet goodbye.

Standing up straight, Anubis straightened his robes and looked up at his Father with a grateful smile. “Thank you, Father.”

With that, Osiris nodded, ushering Anubis away back into the Hall of Truth. Duty never rested, and his role as patron to the lost was eternal. A role Anubis took very seriously.

A role that had always been and would always be incredibly close to his heart.

#the dark mother's scriptures #exophilia #terato #tw death #tw murder #tw abuse #monster x reader #monster x fem!reader #anubis x reader #anubis x fem!reader #anubis #monsters #fem!reader

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dreamersleeps · 4 years ago

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Feathers of Truth and Judgement

Ma’at and the Weighing of the Heart: Revisiting the Death of Jin Bubaigawara

Before I begin, this may not make any sense if you are not familiar with some of what I’ve written about. This is an add on to my post about the interesting similarities between Hawks’ character and the Egyptian God Horus.

Recap: Tokoyami, Hawks and Endeavor

To recap what I’ve already written previously, there are most definitely Greek/Roman mythological influences in BNHA but there are also Egyptian ones as well most explicitly through Tokoyami Fumikage who basically looks like how Egyptian dieties were portrayed: the head of an animal and the body of a human. Additionally, he has a move named after an Egyptian symbol, the Ankh and his quirk, Dark Shadow is basically a version of the Egyptian concept of the shadow, called shut/swt.

And so I began looking at where else there may be some interesting similarities between BNHA and Egyptian mythology, and eventually started making some connections between Hawks and Horus, and Endeavor and Ra, the Sun God that fit the narrative and symbolism of the two characters. Whether they are mere coincidences or unintentional, I still think that it is interesting to look at and consider. So here we are.

The Egyptian Underworld

The image above is from the Book of the Dead of Ani. Osiris is depicted sitting with Isis and Nephthys behind him.

In Egyptian mythology, Horus is the son of Osiris and Isis. One of the most famous stories tells of how Osiris’ brother Set takes his life, cuts his body in to several pieces and disperses them across Egypt. A spirit can only travel in to the underworld if they are properly embalmed and buried so Horus and Isis travel around and search for the parts of Osiris’ body. (Depending on the source you are looking at, some say that Isis traveled around with her sister Nephthys, and Horus was born after she resurrects Osiris).

Osiris is resurrected and is able to travel to the underworld where he becomes the Egyptian Lord of the Underworld, and the Judge of the Dead.

Why am I bringing up Osiris? Well his son, Horus is important in relating back to Hawks and Endeavor, but he also leads us to another important deity who I will introduce later. Back when I was gathering information to work with, I noticed that there was some interesting bits about the Afterlife and Judgement process I wanted to add in but to keep it simple, I cut that part out. However, I thought that this was too interesting to not post about.

The Egyptian Afterlife and Judgement

In order to illustrate and explain what the ancient Egyptians believed happened after an individual passed, I included a large excerpt below from the World History Encyclopedia:

In the Egyptian Book of the Dead it is recorded that, after death, the soul would be met by the god Anubis who would lead it from its final resting place to the Hall of Truth.

When it came one’s turn, Anubis would lead the soul to stand before Osiris and the scribe of the gods, Thoth in front of the golden scales. The goddess Ma’at, personification of harmony and balance, would also be present and surrounded by the Forty-Two Judges who would consult with these gods on one’s eternal fate.

The soul would then recite the Negative Confessions in which one needed to be able to claim, honestly, that one had not committed certain sins. The negative declarations, always beginning with “I have not...” or “I did not...”, following the opening prayer went to assure Osiris of the soul’s purity. Each sin listed was thought to have disrupted one’s harmony and balance while one lived and separated the person from their purpose on earth as ordained by the gods.

Anubis or Qebhet, his daughter weighs a human’s soul against the weight of the feather of Ma’at while Osiris watches on, Isis and Nephthys behind him.

The ‘heart’ of the soul was handed over to Osiris who placed it on a great golden scale balanced against the white feather of Ma’at, the feather of truth on the other side. If the soul’s heart was lighter than the feather then the gods conferred with the Forty-Two Judges and, if they agreed that the soul was justified the person could pass on toward the Field of Reeds, or paradise.

If the heart proved heavier, it was thrown to the floor of the Hall of Truth where it was devoured by Amenti/Amut. Once the person’s heart is devoured, the individual soul ceased to exist (The ancient Egyptians had no concept that is equivalent to the Judeo-Christian hell).

I’m sure you’ve identified one of the key highlights from the excerpt above that connects directly to Hawks: Ma’at’s feather. Let’s take a closer look at the deity.

The Goddess Ma’at, the Feather of Truth and Judgment

In ancient Egyptian mythology, Ma’at was the goddess of truth, justice, balance and morality. She is often depicted as a woman, with a feather on her head and/or with wings (as depicted above). She was the daughter of the sun god Ra, and the wife of Thoth, the god of wisdom and the moon.

The feather she wears on her head symbolizes her being and presence. It was a representation of balance and order, and it eventually became a hieroglyph for “truth.”

Truth, truth, truth, what does it have to do with Hawks? Well, Hawks is a man who yearns for the truth. He seeks information out, collects it, and analyzes it. When he was first introduced he was shrouded in mystery, people wondered, was he someone to be trusted?

While he could be very blunt with the truth, he was also very deceptive and good at lying. Truth and knowledge is very intertwined with his character design as we see in his name.

Hawks’ true name, gets revealed to us through Dabi: Takami Keigo. According to the BNHA fandom website, Hawks’ surname translates as:

“hawk” (taka 鷹) + “see, visible, idea” (mi 見 )

While his first name translates as:

“disclose, open, say” (kei 啓) + “enlightenment, understanding” (go 悟).

What does Hawks do with all the information and “truths” he gathers? Well, what do we do when we hear or discover the truth?

We make a judgement.

In the court of law, truths and evidences are used to pass judgement. In ancient Egypt, Ma’at was associated with the law and justice.

The ‘Spirit of Ma’at’ was embodied by the chief judge in charge of the Egyptian law courts. He had a dual role, serving as both a priest and working directly in the law courts and justice system. They wore the feather of Ma��at and all other court officials wore small golden images of the goddess as a sign of their judicial authority, also as a symbol that their judgement would be balanced and fair.

Priests drew the Feather of Ma’at on their tongues with green dye, so that the words they spoke were the truth. They would rule on the earthly punishment according to the nature of the law that had been broken.

Punishments included imposing fines, corporal punishment and in extreme cases capital punishment. It was considered a crime against Ma’at if a person engaged in jealousy, dishonesty, gluttony, laziness, injustice, and ungratefulness (ancient origins).

Hawks’ Fierce Wings quirk gives him the ability to turn his feathers in to weapons as we see below which is quite ironic or absurd to think about.

How can a feather condemn someone to death? Well as we saw earlier, in ancient Egypt, one’s fate was determined by the sins they committed in the life they led, and ultimately the weight of their soul compared to that of the Feather of Ma’at.

We are presented with Jin’s backstory that Hawks was most likely able to dig up through his sources which is how he got to his conclusion.

Similar to the process that takes place in the Hall of Truth, Jin’s past and life is reviewed, gone through, and he see how he came to be the person he was. Hawks calls him unlucky. He believes that Jin is a good person, and can be helped.

The problem is, is that heroes are no supposed to act as the judge, jury or executioner. The main role of heroes is to save, and subdue those who are dangerous, passing them on to the police and courts of law: as Hawks was originally intending to do.

But as Jin continues to resist, Hawks changes his intentions.

Their struggle concludes with the death of Jin Bubaigawara.

The Heroes are not Gods

The ancient Egyptians looked to Ma’at to maintain the balance and harmony between good and evil. She represented the truth and morality, and under her guidance those behind the law passed judgement.

However Hawks is not Ma’at. He is not a god. Instead of acting as a servant of the law, Hawks takes it upon himself to embody and become the law. But on the basis of what exactly? It does not matter because he passes judgement himself. He takes his feather and executes Jin based on what he believes is the truth and justice. We are reminded of this objectiveness through the subtitle of Volume 27: One’s Justice.

For the longest time, heroes basically were perceived as living gods. Even worshipped, to an extent. Quirks set heroes apart from civilians, placing them on top of the pyramid of power. People lived in a hero saturated society, similar as to how the ancient Egyptians lived with their deities being a part of a great majority of their day to day existences. Despite all the interesting connections and parallels that I can write about, especially with Endeavor and Hawks, it does not change the truth that they are still human: as human as the quirkless. Perhaps their greatest fault was that they acted and lived like gods.

As always, thank you for putting in time to read through this post! I appreciate it. Manga panels throughout this post are from Chapters 264, 265, and 291

#hawks #takami keigo #twice #jin bubaigawara #bnha analysis #mha analysis #bnha meta #mha meta #mythological influences #bnha #mha #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #luna writes #my post

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