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just-a-ghost00 · 3 months ago

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Tarot investigation : a portrait of your divine counterpart

In this reading, we are trying to figure out details about your divine counterpart. If the description I make sounds familiar to you, this may be an indication that you have met them. If it sounds like you, it may mean that your counterpart mirrors you. As this is a collective reading, you may not resonate with all that is said so keep that in mind as you check your group.

Group 1

Key words : Leo, Taurus, stubbornness, communication, mind over body, dedication, fixed sign energy, "man of principles", Seo Changbin vibes, LGBTQIA+ ally, gender fluid, fighter

Personality | Strength & knight of swords

We have someone here that is extremely opinionated. Once they have an idea in mind it is hard to change their point of view. This is someone that is educated and a good strategist. They spend a lot of time thinking, analyzing, observing. Their actions match their train of thought. They have an unwavering mindset. They are bold, confident, stubborn, cutting. Their mind is sharp and intense. They could tend to overthink at times. They value mental connection and stimulation, maturity in decision making, alignment between a person's ideals and their day to day attitude. This is someone that talks the talk and walks the walk. When they say they're gonna do something, they stick to their word. They give a high importance to their principles and they would rather die than leave them aside. They are extremely prideful. This is someone that can both be pretty optimistic at times but also very harsh on themselves. They expect nothing but the best and they will do anything in their power to get there. They are competitive af. They do not back down from a challenge. They may enjoy being in the spotlight and may find themselves at the center of drama because of that. They have a very flamboyant personality. This is the type of person that isn't afraid to express their opinions in society, no matter what others might think of them. This is also someone that has a combative spirit. They cannot stand injustice. So you can be sure that if they ever feel like something is unfair, they will speak up about it.

Appearance | knight of pentacles & ace of cups

In appearance, this is someone that is very jovial and approachable. They smile a lot and their presence is inviting. They look very polite and well mannered. They are likely to be tall and have a youthfull look to them. They may have a round face and/ or dimples. Their body is strong, their posture is good. They tend to keep their head high and square off their shoulders, especially if they lift weights. They look reliable and trust worthy. I feel like their sense of fashion is quite simple but aesthetically pleasing. They prefer practical clothing over fashionable ones. They like to feel comfortable in their shoes but this person is astonishing nontheless. They are conventionally attractive. They got the baby face with the dad body if they identify as a "man". Or the hourglass body figure with the doll look if they identify as a "woman". But I feel like this person is pretty fluid when it comes to their gender and even their style. So maybe one day, this person can come to work wearing one style and the next look completely different and somehow that doesn't surprise anyone. They even rock the outfit completely. Like, I'm picturing a guy that tends to wear rather dark street wear suddenly come to work wearing a skirt and heels and that wouldn't shock any of their colleagues. It's like this person has a very unique and fluid sense of style, but no matter what they do or wear, they always look very sensual and natural. They may advocate for unisex clothing, for diversity in general especially when it comes to fashion, sexual and gender identity.

Interests | 8 of wands & 8 of pentacles

This person values hard work and dedication in everything that they do. With the combined energy of the 8 of wands and the 8 of pentacles, I pick on the energy of someone that is very active on a day to day basis. They do a lot of physical activity of all kinds because they enjoy movement above anything else. They don't like feeling stuck or still. They may be a bit hyperactive. But I feel like this person would enjoy certain activities more than others, especially very competitive ones. So think of martial arts, athletism, body building. They could also enjoy extreme sports or very challenging activities like bungee jumping, sky diving, parkour, mountaineering and so on. I'm picking up on a lot of outdoor activities. If you associate 8 of wands with fast action and 8 of pentacles with hard labor, you get activities like cross fit, HIIT training and so on. But more than that, this person just enjoys pushing past their limits and expanding. So any activity that would get them out of their comfort zone would interest them. They also enjoy travelling, walking, hiking. Urbex is also coming to mind. Just so you know, this person is restless and has a lot of energy to spend, especially when it comes to bed time activities. They have a lot of stamina and may be horny 24/7.

Additional information | 9 of pentacles & 10 of swords

This person is likely to be single at the moment. Their job allows them to live a comfortable life. They are independent and focusing on their material life. They may have gone through a break up recently. That or a difficult phase in their life. This may be about a romantic connection, a platonic connection, a contract of some sort. This may be about their family, their health or their career. It depends on each individual. The common theme is that this person may not be emotionally available when you meet, if that hasn't already happened. This may be someone that tends to isolate themselves and values their inner peace a lot. They may have struggled with depression.

Group 2

Keywords : Taurus, water signs, giving, peaceful, commited, believer of God, traditions, cinnamon roll in disguise

Personality | 10 of pentacles & ace of pentacles

This is someone that is hopeful, accepting, optimistic. They are open minded and very mature. They like to see the glass half full and choose to believe in the good of mankind. This is a family person, a community person. Someone that values kinship, friendship, trust. They always take their time and do things with the utmost care. This is someone that likes to be helpful, that gives valuable advice. Someone peaceful, quiet, sometimes shy or reserved but always generous and kind. They like novelty but they value security above anything else. So compared to group 1's person, this person may not get out of their comfort zone very often. They like to remain organized and in control of what is going on. They like to know that things are safe and predictable. This is someone that likes patterns. They always do the same things at the same time with the same people. They value tradition, hard work, dedication, but more importantly they value authenticity. This is a person that is very respectful and polite. They would never cause harm to anyone. They are extremely cautious and always proceeds the same way because it reassures them and ensures reliability for others. This is someone that isn't afraid to spend their time, money on things and people because they know it is useful. They would never deny someone of their help. This is someone with a very tranquil and stable personality. With so much Earth energy, they may have a hard time expressing their feelings but this is someone that you can always count on to support and cheer others.

Appearance | 7 of wands & 3 of cups

This is someone that may look a bit cocky or like they are defying others. Their stance and posture may show a certain level of confidence but also a certain tension, like they're ready to fight anytime. This may be because they feel a bit uncomfortable around large amounts of people. They look reliable to some extent, at least they look like they can fight and should not be messed with. They also have a playful vibe to them. So I picture someone very laid back, that doesn't really care about how they look or fashion. They prefer practical and simple clothes. So think of baggy jeans, sneakers, sweat pants, sweat shirts. They may wear boots, leather jackets. Things that are a bit old school but never go out of fashion. Their appearance may be a bit different from who they are on the inside. So they may try to appear a bit more cocky and bold than they actually are to keep people at arms length. So if this person identifies as a "woman", they may wear clothes that make them look more "manly" so to speak. A bit of a tomboy look. But not necessarily. If they identify as a "man", maybe kind of a biker/military look. I'm picking up on bead bracelets and leather bands, piercings, bold silver rings. Kind of a Johnny Depp look. Or if we remain on the Kpop side, I think the artists that would best match the vibe I'm picking up on are Lee Know from SKZ, San/Seonghwa from Ateez and Ryujin from Itzy. There's some sort of duality to them. So maybe their looks is plain but they wear colorful accessories or bold makeup.

Interests | ace of cups & 9 of pentacles

This person likes to spend time with friends and family mainly. But their also into helping others, sharing similar interests. They may enjoy creative activities like doing DIYs, farming, gardening and such. They may enjoy cooking. I'm also picking up on community work, raising funds, helping others in general. This may be the type of person that does a lot of acts of service around them, out of pure generosity. They'll help the elders even if they don't know them, look out for children and make sure they safely get back home, help strangers looking for directions. They may work with humanitarian organizations, advocate for several causes. They may pray a lot or spend time contemplating on life. They just love sharing and connecting with people of all horizons, feeling like they belong somewhere. Their job may involve healing, care, sharing of experience. They like chilling out in nature, walking in public gardens, watching people have fun. Seeing people happy makes them happy even if they, themselves, aren't doing anything. They like tranquility and moments of unity. They may enjoy going to the theater alone, camping, painting and such.

Additional information | 7 of cups, Hierophant

Though they may be presented with many options and have many suitors, this person doesn't care if these cannot fulfill them on a spiritual level. Remember, this person values authenticity. They also value loyalty and commitment. Traditions matter to them a lot. So does education and the law. Respect is a must. If this person feels disrespected in any way, they won't have any problem cutting you off. This is also someone that is extremely curious and seeks for knowledge. Any opportunity they get to learn about others and themselves, they will take. When you meet them, this person will likely be open to dating but they will be looking for a serious and committed relationship right from the get go. They don't play around, they don't f**k around. They're not into one night stands or open relationships. No, they want the exclusive long-term relationship they've always envisioned, the one dictated by the ideals and beliefs that they were raised in, that they value deeply. This is the type of person that is likely to marry and have children. This person is single and ready to mingle.

Group 3

Key words : Taurus, Aries, Pisces, childhood friend, soulmate, calm and collected, caring, mischief, LGBTQIA+ member/ally, unaware of their own power

Personality | 4 of pentacles & page of wands + knight of wands

This person is quite shy and reserved, especially around strangers. However, they show their true face when they feel safe. This is someone that is cheerful, lively, a bit of a trickster. They enjoy life, they love to have fun with their close circle. They love to be in the comfort of their home. They may be a bit immature at times and narrow minded but that is never meant to hurt anyone. They’re just set in their ways and a little inexperienced. They are quite creative and imaginative, curious as well to some extent but they tend to refrain from doing certain activities, maybe out of fear. This is someone that enjoys routines and rarely changes anything about their life. However they crave for more, they like adventure and they can be bold at times. This is someone that isn’t fully aware of their skills and power. They’re the life of the party and they could shine so bright but they tend to hide it most of the time or ignore the fire inside. This could be someone that was taught to feel ashamed of themselves for some reason. Maybe because of the way they look or what they believe in.

Appearance | Hierophant & Fool

This person has a very juvenile look. But also a very conservative one. They’re likely to blend in the crowd. They may be religious so they may wear a veil for example. Or very traditional clothes associated with their culture. If not, this person tends to wear baggy clothes, very simple clothing that doesn’t stand out that much. Things that are very practical or sportsy. We have someone that could have a very youthful face but their eyes would betray the maturity of their personality or the hell they’ve been through. I picture someone who’s height is average, with an average body type. Their gaze looks lost, like their body is here but their mind is somewhere else. They may wear glasses. With the Hierophant I get the image of someone strictly following society’s norms that were set for their gender but combined with the Fool I get the feeling of someone that would want to break free from those. This is a very contradicting energy. So maybe this person tries to walk on the line of what is acceptable to society and what is acceptable to them. So maybe they mix traditional clothing with modern clothing or they try to wear clothes that would fit all genders. I don’t see this person wearing jewellery or make up.

Interests | Queen of cups & 7 of wands

This person just wants peace. They like to share and spend time with the people they love without any trouble. They want to protect what they believe in, their inner peace and inner circle. I feel like this person could have been bullied in the past or faced a lot of struggles. Their job could involve healing, therapy, helping people find their true self. This person feels very unique in their personality and being. And I can't help but to wonder whether they are a part of the LGBTQIA+ community. If that's the case, I feel like this person hasn't made their coming out. That is very specific so that may not be the case for everyone. To some extent, this person likes to be challenged if it can broaden their mind. But in that case, they need it to be healing and fair. They won't accept change if it is forced onto them. This person could be a teacher or some sort of guide. I can't pick up on more information. So I drew an extra card and got the World. This person enjoys traveling, learning about other cultures, broadening their mind and horizons. They like learning new languages or just, in general, doing things that are out of the ordinary. So if this person never goes to the theater for instance, just doint that can be thrilling for them. Anything that gets them to leave their home and be in unknown territory interests them.

Additional information | The Emperor & 6 of cups

This is someone that is extremely powerful and influential but they have no idea of that power. They're a natural born leader and they could be amazing if they fully trusted themselves and embraced their true self. This person could be a childhood friend of yours or at least someone from your past. They could be one of your soulmates. This person could be heavily influenced by a father figure. They are highly spiritual and in touch with their ancestors. They are also intuitive. You could feel connected to them through your dreams. This person is also heavily influenced by their past. A part of them still hasn't healed from it. For this person specifically, the artist that could embody their energy would be Han from SKZ or Hwiyoung from SF9.

#just-a-ghost #tarot reading #pick a card #pac reading #tarot investigation #divine counterpart pac #Spotify

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heeheesang · 7 months ago

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𝗰𝗼-𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸𝗲𝗿𝘀

currently discontinued. (or on hold until i can think of a plot😊🙏🏻)

𝗰𝗼-𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸𝗲𝗿𝘀 | a park sunghoon smau.

in which : seo yn has to work with park sunghoon a lot more than she expected. she has never had a problem with working with opposite genders but with sunghoon, oh boy was it different. the only thing holding her back? the company and their fans.

𝗰𝗼-𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸𝗲𝗿𝘀 | cast

violetta : a group consisting of six people, debuted in december 2020, under hybe entertainment.

seo yn : leader, 20, main vocalist, lead dancer, sub rapper. has been a trainee for about three years, 'it' girl of fourth gen.

enhypen : a group consisting of seven people, debuted in november 2020, under hybe entertainment.

park sunghoon : visual, 22, lead dancer, lead vocalist, lead rapper, trained for two years and one month, 'it' boy of fourth gen.

𝗰𝗼-𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸𝗲𝗿𝘀 | chapters!

we are disbanding

you got the message too huh...

pls don't kys yn!

surprise!

haters BOOO (a mention about suicide..!)

sunghoon bodyguard era (word slut used twice, yn faces trauma, fans breaking in..!)

yn "pick me"

violetta and enhypen?!

practice time..!

ynhoon's first month as emcees..!

collaboration!

we called it.

why is she ignoring me :(

you're not a nonchalant dreadhead yn

you what.

lowkey a date.

soft launching.

hugs and kisses.

dispatch. oh!

confirmed rumors.

taglist is closed !! (leave a comment or an ask!!)

@sleepyzce @onlyhyunjin @sngleehee @kookify @rikitachiquita @yourssincerely-mimi @sol3chu @erisasleep @yawn-zi @coffeeprincejaehyun @dreeki @hoonatic @haechansbbg @d-dilemma @hooneverse @enhabun @illvding @charlizefaye @luvvvash @sunkiwon @flaminghotyourmom @doublebunv @horijiro @moonshoon

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wannaeatramyeon · 5 months ago

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Samuel Seo x Reader: Waiting

G/N. 3 separate fluffy scenes. Sammy just being sweet and not unhinged. Masterlists

"Sammy you don't have to come with me."

He gives you a look over the top of his glasses. One he reserves for when someone is being particularly ignorant and stupid.

(Jake Kim and Ryuhei Kuroda have been on the receiving end of this many many times.)

You think he's being a little unfair.

"I thought you were supposed to do something with your friend?"

"It's fine." Samuel responds.

It really isn't.

Goo had thrown something of a tantrum when Samuel said he wasn't able to accompany him on his latest errands. Threats of his secret (or not so secret) friend status was bandied about.

However, you have a medical appointment. Which is really more of a check up than anything, but Samuel still thinks he should be by your side.

He understands that it's standard procedure. Nothing is expected to come from it.

But there's a lot of things in his life that he regrets, and he's trying not to make any moves that would make you regret being with him.

"Sammy-"

"No." His tone holds no room for argument. "I'm coming with you."

Samuel, the absolute sweetheart, plays chauffeur without complaint and always walks you to your front door.

You had nearly swooned the first time he strolled around to your side, opened the car door for you to climb out as elegantly as you could (which was not very), and strode next to you with his hand resting on your hip.

Over time, it had become second nature for him to do so and every time, you find it just as sweet as the first.

"Did you want to come in?" You ask him under the porch light as you fiddle around with the keys.

That was also something you asked after you became better... acquainted. Nine times out of ten, Samuel would answer with a hungry glint in his eyes and a smirk that makes you want him to devour you.

Tonight-

"I've got an early morning."

It's a straightforward response. You know there's no game playing, yet you can't help the pang of disappointment and rejection. "Oh."

He chuckles at your response, the eagerness that was so clearly painted on your face then the way it dropped, "Were you expecting something?"

Samuel knows exactly what you were expecting, and relishes the way his question makes you blush.

"No!" Even to your own ears it sounds like a complete lie.

"Tomorrow," he promises, kissing you on the lips and leaving you breathless.

No matter what time your train gets in, Samuel is there waiting on the platform for you.

Sometimes it's with a bouquet, sometimes it's with a coffee. A little pick-me-up that he has thoughtfully prepared for you.

He really didn't need to do this, although you express constantly how much you greatly appreciate it. You've told him again and again but he insists on being there for his peace of mind. To make sure you've arrived safely, to make sure that you return back to his arms in one piece.

In the past he has cut off meetings with Eugene early, or heads back to the office to work late into night once he has taken you home.

For him, it's always worth it.

"Sammy!"

You're the first off the train, already impatiently gathering your things as soon as you recognised his outline waiting on the platform. Practically running off the carriage and full body slamming into his open arms.

He holds you like he hasn't seen you in years, like you're his lifeline and he's been adrift without you by his side even if it's only been half a day.

"Let's go home," he says, finally releasing you from his embrace. He offers up his hand and you happily intertwine your fingers together.

#is he fixed? lol no. but he does exhibit some green flag qualities #lookism #lookism headcanons #lookism x reader #lookism hc #lookism manhwa #lookism webtoon #samuel seo x reader #samuel seo #seo seongeun #seo seongeun x reader #lookism fic #lookism fanfic #wannaeatramyeon

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itsbeeble · 1 year ago

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Gorgeous

SUMMARY: Minghao was the black sheep, though you'd never understood why. Maybe it's time you figure it out.

GENRE: smut, fluff, angst (MAJOR ANGST)

PAIRING: Xu Minghao x afab!reader

WC: 5.5k

SERIES MASTERLIST

PERM TAGLIST: @juyeonszn @winterchimez

SERIES TAGLIST: @captain-brie @nobraincellmode

18+ MDNI AGELESS BLOGS WILL BE BLOCKED

WARNINGS: this is actually really dark, infidelity, rich people core, p in v sex, exhibitionism (yn gets fingered in the back of her car while on the phone), minghao is possessive, stalker themes, criminal, mentions of blood, reader gets injured, a lot goes on actually i've never written something like this el oh el

A/N: this was NOT supposed to end up like it did, but I decided on a whim to do this. Thank you to @sungbeam and @mosviqu for beta reading this (even if some of it was very last minute). I hope everyone enjoys this as much as I did teehee

“Who is that?” You tilt your head, eyes trained in the direction of someone you’d never seen before at these functions. Your friend, Jang Gyuri, follows your eyes and kisses her teeth.

“Xu Minghao,” she brings her lips close to your ear so only you can hear her. No need for prying eyes and ears to hear what she has to say and spread unwanted rumors. “I’d stay away from him if I were you.”

“Why?”

Many people would have described you as innocent. You came from “new money” as they would call it. Your father practically struck gold when he decided in his early thirties to start a business. The company grew quickly, the products being released becoming popular all over South Korea and, eventually, internationally. You knew that you should pay more attention to his work, as you’d likely inherit it one day, but you can’t find it in you to care. With this recent rise to power, you’d been taking advantage of your seemingly neverending access to parties of all kinds. Galas, clubs, birthday parties for the spoiled brats that had been born into this life. You were a free spirit, never one to avoid cameras, and that made you dangerous in the eyes of many in this country. Gyuri told you that, though old money was never afraid of new money, new money had the power of intimidation.

She’d told you many names as examples: Wen Junhui, Choi Yeonjun, Lee Chan, Han Jisung, Bae Joohyun, Kang Seulgi, Chwe Hansol. Though their families weren’t necessarily liked, they held status among the wealthy children for varying reasons— proving their worth being the main reason, intimidation being another.

Xu Minghao, however, was never a name you had heard in these recent months. Maybe there was a reason for that, you note when your eyes meet his lidded ones and he flashes you a lazy smirk. Your cheeks heat up, and you turn your gaze back to Gyuri. She’s giving you a dirty look, her painted red lips pursed and her eyebrows knit together.

“He’s bad news, Y/N,” she warns. “Seungcheol will tell you about it, and he’d want you to be careful around him.”

“Seungcheol,” your voice is laced with venom, “is in the bathroom with Seo Yookyung. I don’t think he cares what I do, so long as I don’t ruin his reputation.”

“That’s not exactly what I would call a healthy relationship.”

Both you and Gyuri flinch, startled by the interruption, and turn to scold whoever jumped into a private conversation.

You fall short, however, your mouth partially hanging open with shock and, honestly, awe.

From afar, you could tell that he was attractive but now that he’s up close? You feel like you could sink and drown in him. Long dark hair, thin and pointed face, scrutinizing eyes. He was intimidating to most, this you could tell. But to you?

He was the most gorgeous person you had ever had the pleasure of laying your eyes on.

“Xu Minghao,” Gyuri’s tone is cold and she shuffles to stand just slightly in front of you, something both you and Minghao notice.

“Jang Gyuri,” Minghao mocks, sticking one of his hands into a pocket in his slacks.

“What are you doing here? Don’t you know by now that you aren’t welcome?” Her words are sharp, and it almost scares you. Gyuri, despite her reputation for being cruel, had always been kind to you. She’d been a sort of mentor to you, teaching you the rights and wrongs in terms of “rich behavior”. She taught you the right people to associate with, and the wrong people to associate with. However, she had never once raised her voice or made you feel unwelcome. Quite unlike how she talks to Minghao.

“I go wherever I please, Jang Gyuri.” Minghao sighs, a puff of air that makes a few loose strands of hair flutter out of his face. Then his eyes return to you, scanning your body but not in a seductive manner. No, he’s curious. You can see it in his eyes, behind the cold front he puts up. “And…who might you be?”

“None of your business—”

“L/N Y/N—”

You and Gyuri speak at the same time, and you shut your mouth quickly when she shoots you another nasty look. Minghao, however, is amused. One side of his mouth quirks up in a mild show of this, the corners of his lips picking up.

“So, which is it?” He inquires. “None of your business or Y/N L/N? I’m not a betting man, but I’d wager that it’s the latter.”

You poorly stifle a laugh, covering it with a cough.

“What do you want?” Gyuri hisses out, tapping a heel on the marble floor impatiently. Minghao presses his lips together, loosely shrugging his shoulders.

“Just wanted to see if I could buy your lovely friend here a drink.”

“She’s taken.”

“She,” you finally interrupt Gyuri and place a hand on her collarbone to gently push her back. “Can speak for herself. And she will need a few more drinks to make it through the night.”

Gyuri sputters out an argument, trying to get you to stop, but Minghao grins down at you and offers his arm. You gladly take it, giving Gyuri one more warning look before you’re tugged away through the crowd.

“You’re new money.” Minghao leans against the counter next to you while you sit on one of the few open stools left. There’s a martini in front of you, one that’s barely been touched since you received it a few minutes ago.

“Is it that obvious?” You tilt your head and Minghao smiles, his head dipping down a bit.

“Not entirely,” he looks back up and shifts his weight. “Only if you know what to look for.”

“And what, exactly,” you lean toward him, resting your chin on the back of your hand, “are you looking for?”

His tongue runs over his lip, eyebrows furrowing in thought.

“You’re interesting, Y/N L/N.” Evading the question.

“Oh?” You finally bring your martini glass to your lips, taking a small sip of the alcoholic beverage. “Why is that, Xu Minghao?”

“You don’t…you don’t know who I am, do you?” Your lips quirk into a small smile.

“No, I don’t. Is it something important?”

For the first time since you’d begun talking to him, he falls quiet in a way that shows discomfort. Your smile drops, and you lean back on your stool.

“Minghao,” you start. “Is there something I should know?”

You see a muscle in his jaw feather, see his eyes dance around you to see who was around. One of your hands falls to your lap, playing with the expensive fabric of your dress. Now he’s avoiding your questions.

“I’m…” he huffs out a breath, tilting his head back and scoffing out a laugh. “I can’t believe I’m saying this to someone I just met, but…there’s something about you that I just can’t place.”

“I’ve been told that by many people.” Minghao shifts closer to you, his arm resting on the back of your chair.

“What else have they told you?”

“That I can be a bit…straightforward.” His other hand is on the counter, and your fingers dance just a bit closer to his, the tips brushing together slightly. “That when I get nervous, I either talk too much or not at all.”

“And…?” He leans his head down a bit.

“That you’re bad,” your voice lowers, your lips curling into a smirk. “That I should stay away from you.”

“And I take it you don’t listen to these people, do you?” Minghao asks, his voice dropping an octave. There’s tension around you, something so thick you could cut it with a knife.

“Not at all.”

“What would they do if I asked you to leave with me?” His fingers finally lace with yours and you hum, pretending to think.

“Seungcheol might not like that very much.”

Minghao scoffs. “You know damn well that he left a long time ago.”

“But still…” you sigh and shake your head. “Someone has to be loyal.”

A nod from the man in front of you, and a sly smile.

“I understand, and I won’t make you do anything.” He squeezes your hand once, and you feel him slide a piece of paper into your palm. He waits for your fingers to close around the paper before he pulls his hand away. “You’ll know where to find me when you change your mind and drop him. And, when you do, I’ll be waiting.”

When he leaves the building, you feel like you can finally breathe. Your shoulders relax, your heart beating rapidly in your chest. You’re in the middle of trying to get your body under control when Gyuri stomps back over to you.

“What the hell were you thinking, talking to a man like him?” Her nails dig into your upper arm, scraping into your skin and causing you to suck in a sharp breath. “Are you stupid?”

“I don’t see what your problem is,” you sigh and finish off your martini before sliding off your barstool. Your feet are aching at this point, and you’re just itching to get out of this dress. “He isn’t as bad as you think he is.”

“Xu Minghao isn’t the man he’s seemed to convince you he is.” Gyuri warns you. “He’s a liar, just like his father is. He’ll hurt you, Y/N, and don’t come crying to me when he does. I’ll just tell you that I warned you and tried to stop you. I won’t help you if you get yourself tangled up with him.”

“It’s a good thing I won’t need your help then, isn’t it?” You retort, tearing your arm out of her grip and straightening your posture. “I know exactly what I’m doing, Gyuri, and I won’t let you or Seungcheol stop me anymore.”

“Gyuri tells me you’ve been talking to Xu Minghao.” Seungcheol looks at you in the mirror as he tightens the tie around his throat. You’re in the middle of sliding on another pair of uncomfortable shoes that will have your toes bleeding by the end of the night, and raise your gaze to look at him.

“I have. Only once, though.” Your eyes return to the ground to grab the second heel. For two weeks you had been talking to this…mystery man. You’d learned more about him every day, of his father’s scandals that would have left his family bankrupt had Minghao not come out and saved the company. You found it admirable but most chose to despise him, refusing partnerships and refusing to admit the good he’s done for his company and family as someone so young.

And, of course, you had only done this with a little bit of research and a quick phone call to the number he slipped into your hand. You’re sure Seungcheol knows this, knows that you’re too curious for your own good. This is something the two of you had argued about far too many times to count, and he’s since given up on trying to stop you.

“I’m sure that you’re aware of everything, then?”

“Aware of Minghao’s father or of your infidelity?” You rise to your feet, and Seungcheol freezes for just a moment before carrying on.

“Ah.”

“If you’re going to whore yourself out,” Your hand brushes against your boyfriend’s shoulder and you spin him around so you can tie the fabric around his neck. “At least do it where no one will see you.” Your lips are drawn into a tight smile and you rest your hand on his chest. “At least do it where no one will see you, my love.”

“I take it…” Seungcheol watches you walk away and listens to the clicking of your heels on the ground. “...that the engagement is off, then?”

“Correct.”

“What will you do?” You turn to look at the man you once tolerated, now finding him disgusting.

“I think that I’ll be just fine. I have an apartment, I have a family that loves me, and a thriving company that I need to learn to lead. You, however, should worry about your status once news of your actions hits the papers come Monday.”

Seungcheol nods slowly, his tongue digging into his cheek.

“I have a ride to the gala,” you make your way for the bedroom door, lips drawn into a thin line. “I will have someone collect my things tomorrow morning, so make sure everything is exactly as it is now because they will have a list and I will come for everything you have if your toy for the night has the gall to take my belongings again.”

Seungcheol looks at you for a long moment, watching you leave the room before choosing to follow you.

“And what of the deal your father made with my company?”

“Find someone else,” you shrug. “My father just wanted to make connections and you happened to give him the perfect opportunity to benefit both companies.”

“I could tell people, you know.” Seungcheol places his hand on the front door, stopping you from leaving. You turn to face him, your eyes narrowed. He doesn’t appear angry, yet he isn’t looking too pleased either. “That you had an affair. They would believe me. They would never believe someone like you.”

An easy smile passes over your lips, and you place a hand on his chest. “I don’t need them to believe me. Gyuri, on the other hand…” you kiss your teeth. “She can be quite the devil, no?”

“Gyuri trusts him?” Seungcheol asks and you can practically taste the disbelief.

“No, she doesn’t,” your lips draw into a thin line. “She does, however, trust me.”

A silent type of anger radiates off Seungcheol as you turn away from him again. This time, when the door shuts, he doesn’t follow you. You’re glad he doesn’t. It makes it much easier to steady your breathing and the shaking in your hands.

You arrive at the party alone this time. There is no Gyuri and no Seungcheol to protect you from the cameras, from the invasive questions, and the microphones shoved into your face. It startles you and before you can get one foot out of the door, your body freezes up. One of the guards your father hired yells something, and then there’s someone sliding into your car and pushing you back.

“Take a breath,” a soft, silky voice pushes through the yells outside the car. A hand cradles the back of your head, tangling in your long strands of hair, pulling you closer and tucking you into the crook of his neck. “Just breathe, love.”

Maybe it's the adrenaline, maybe it’s the freedom you now know you have, but suddenly you’re laughing and pulling away from Minghao. He looks just as stunning as the last time you saw him. Dark hair, narrowed eyes, lips drawn into a thin line. He’s wearing a suit similar to last time— all black, the top few buttons of his dress shirt undone.

“Are you alright?” His hand comes to your cheek, letting you nestle into his gentle hold. “Talk to me, love. Are you alright?”

But you just keep laughing, and then you’re clutching at his collar and yanking him toward you for a furious kiss. He freezes against you, one hand on your cheek and the other on your waist. It takes him a moment to reciprocate, to get over the initial shock and sink into you. His lips move softly against yours, forcing you to calm down and actually breathe like he’d requested.

After a few moments, you pull away and lean your forehead against his.

“So that’s what this is about?” Minghao murmurs. “You just wanted my attention, is that it?”

“Not necessarily,” you pull away from him, but he doesn’t let you go very far. His hand is just around the curve of your waist, holding you near to him. “I have other reasons.”

“And what would they be?” His lips press against the corner of your mouth, and you feel butterflies erupt in your stomach like a teenager in love.

“I like you, Xu Minghao.” God, you sound like one as well. “Very much.”

“I like you too, Y/N L/N.” Another kiss, this time tilting your head to reach the corner of your jaw. The car starts moving again, and Minghao calls out an address. His address, you assume.

“You’re gorgeous, Minghao,” He laughs against your skin, trailing his lips down your neck slowly. “It makes it hard, you know.”

“Makes what hard, my flower.”

“To focus. To talk to you. You make me so nervous, it’s infuriating.” Your breath hitches as he sucks gently at the skin above a vein. Your hand curls around his neck, tangling in his long strands of hair.

Minghao doesn’t respond, but you don’t mind. Not when he drags you into his lap, the fabric around your body now splayed across the backseat of your car. You can hear your phone ringing, but you ignore it until the sound disappears. You focus on Minghao, focus on the feel of his lips on your skin and his hands all over your body. You focus on swiping your tongue over his lip, on pressing forward until his back is digging into the door, the armrest uncomfortable against his spine but neither of you cares.

Your phone rings again and, this time, Minghao pulls away from you, tilting your chin up and handing you the slim device.

“It’s your father, I think.” His lips press against your jaw, and you exhale shakily. “Shouldn’t worry him too much.”

“Minghao—”

“Answer him.” His hand replaces his lips, giving your jaw a slight squeeze. “Or I will.”

The third ring comes, and you swallow hard. Minghao smiles, his lips curling up as he takes the phone from your hand and swipes on the green button.

“Y/N.” Your father’s voice is steady, and you can hear the exasperation. “What is this I’m hearing from Choi Seungcheol that the engagement is off?”

Minghao’s lips touch your neck again, his fingers sliding under the fabric of your gown to trace up your thigh. It takes all the power in your body to not gasp into the microphone, your eyes fluttering as he touches you.

“He— what did he say?” You briefly stumble over your words, trying desperately to keep a firm grip on your phone and nearly failing when Minghao’s hand dips past your lacy underwear. Two fingers prod at your core and your breath hitches. Your free hand drops down and grips Minghao’s wrist tightly. He shoots you a playful smirk, lips puffy from kissing you and from sucking at your neck. You let him go.

“That you’ve left him. That you had an affair with…” you hear shuffling on the other end of the line, and then a loud sigh. “Xu Minghao?”

“That would be a lie, father.” You inform the older man, and Minghao’s fingers sink deep into you. It’s a wonder you haven’t moaned into your phone yet but with the way his skillful hand pumps in and out of you, soon you very well might. His thumb pushes at your clit, and you let your head drop into his neck, begging silently for him to have mercy on your poor mind and body.

“Is that so?”

“Seungcheol had an affair. Well, several affairs. Minghao simply helped me realize that I wouldn’t—” Your voice cracks as a little whimper almost makes its way out of your mouth. Minghao leans his head against yours and you can feel his cheeks stretching into a smile as he continues to drag his fingers in and out of your sopping-wet walls. He scissors them a bit, and then you feel a third sink into you. Your legs begin to shake and try to close, and with his free hand Minghao grabs onto one of your thighs to hold them open. “—wouldn’t be happy if I stayed with him.”

You hope that the shaking in your voice can pass as upset tears.

“I don’t— It doesn’t matter if you end up happy. I want what’s best for you and the business. Marrying Seungcheol would have balanced this.”

“Marrying Seungcheol would lead to a miserable life and the downfall of two companies.” You snap back, and you hear Minghao beginning to whisper praises into your ear. With red cheeks and a swelling heart, your hips begin to roll down on his fingers. “Minghao, at least, will keep me happy and will benefit both companies in many ways.”

Silence on your father’s end, and a knot begins to form in your stomach.

“Don’t cum yet, flower.” Minghao murmurs, licking at the skin under your ear. “Wait until he hangs up.”

I can’t. You want to scream. Every curl of his fingers, every brush of his thumb against your clit. It’s all becoming too much for you. It’s incredible you’re able to keep yourself together while on the phone.

“Is this what you really want?” Your father asks, and your whole body shudders against Minghao.

“It— it is.” You gasp. Another pregnant pause. Fuck, it’s like your father wants you to suffer.

“Have him come by my office tomorrow for lunch. We’ll all talk then.”

You don’t get the chance to respond before he’s hanging up the phone and the car is rolling to a stop. Minghao rips his fingers out of you, effectively ruining the high you’d been approaching.

“You’re— you’re horrible.” You whine, watching as he brings his fingers to his mouth and sucks them clean.

“You love it, though.” He grins and slides you off his lap so he can get the door. Your body feels like jelly, your mind in a haze. You hardly notice Minghao tugging you by the hand, guiding you out of the car and to the front door of a beautiful house— so beautiful that it nearly takes your breath away.

Minghao’s arm is placed delicately on the small of your back, and you let him guide you into the house and up a grand marble staircase. You can’t begin to express the awe you feel. You can’t help the giddy feeling in your bones when you reach the top of the staircase and Minghao takes your hand. It appears, however, that he is feeling just about the same as you when he smiles so wide that you fear his lips would become stuck like that, and he drags you quickly toward a bedroom.

You let him press you down on the bed and let him kiss his way from your mouth to your jaw, down your neck, and begin to peel the straps of your gown down your body so he can expose more and more skin. You feel like you’re burning up, feel like your body is being set ablaze wherever he touches your body. The zipper along the side of the dress is tugged town, and you raise your hips so Minghao can peel it down the rest of the way and throw the fabric somewhere across the room.

“I should be mad at you for that,” you say to him, although you relish in the feeling of his lips trailing down the valley of your breasts. “That dress was a very expensive gift.”

“Oh?” Minghao’s voice is muffled, and he tugs your panties down your legs as he speaks. “From who?”

You watch as he begins to rid himself of his clothing, watch as he reveals every gorgeous inch of his skin to you.

“Seungcheol.” His gaze hardens when he sees you smirk.

“Then I should burn it, I think. Replace it with something newer, prettier, pricier.” He hovers his body over yours, lacing the fingers of one hand through your own and using his free hand to align himself with you. A pleased sigh is emitted from your lips as he sinks in, back arching as he begins to stretch you out.

“Is that so?” You breathe out. Your hands tangle in his hair, pulling his face closer until you can kiss him.

“Mmm.” Minghao hums against you, beginning to roll his hips slowly into yours. “I should burn everything that he has ever given you, I think.”

You can barely respond, your voice seemingly broken and replaced by gasps for air as he begins to thrust into you harder and faster and you can’t seem to get control of your body. He doesn’t care, though. He doesn’t care that you can only roll your hips into his, can only bite into his skin, and leave dark marks that he won’t be able to hide (not that he would want to). Knowing that you’re enjoying this, fucked too dumb to speak even though he’d only been inside of you for barely a few minutes, it’s all enough for him. It’s more than enough.

“What would he say if he saw us like this?” Minghao continues, his hands sliding down your legs and gently pushing them farther apart. “Hm? Would he stop me? Would he try to fight for you?”

You try to tell him he wouldn’t, but all that comes out of you is helpless babbles.

“I would,” he hisses, and the knot in your stomach returns. It builds and builds, growing tighter and tighter with each passing moment. “He doesn’t deserve you. He doesn’t deserve to touch you, to feel you.”

“And—” you finally manage to choke out a few words. “And what— what m-makes you—oh god, Minghao please— think that— that you do?”

“You already know why, my flower.” Minghao’s hips are slapping against yours at a pace— at a furosity— that you can’t keep up with, “Do you really need me to spell it out for you?”

The knot in your stomach snaps, your walls fluttering around him but he’s relentless. He pounds into you as your body convulses underneath him, your pathetic whines and moans turning into desperate wails.

“I’m better than him in every way,” Minghao grits out, desperately fighting off his own orgasm. “Do you know how long I’ve been keeping an eye on you? How long I’ve wanted to take you from him? You have no idea how hard it was to not take you into the bathroom that night and fuck you the way you deserved. I wanted so badly for you to be mine.”

Overstimulation begins to wash over you, becoming a pleasurable sting that you don’t want to go away. His cock twitches inside of you and his breathing becomes heavier. You can see him trying to say something more, but all that comes out of him is a heavy groan, and then his hips are stuttering against yours. Warm cum spills into you, mixing with your own, and spilling out onto the sheets beneath you. Your legs thrash in Minghao’s grip, but he pins you down as his hips slow. His hair is messy, his forehead tinged with sweat. You can see his mouth hanging open a bit, heavy breaths rolling out of him.

Do you know how long I’ve been keeping an eye on you?

The sentence replays over and over in your mind amidst the scattered post-sex thoughts.

How long I’ve wanted to take you from him?

Minghao rolls to the side, laying beside you on his large bed.

He didn’t say anything to you, and you didn’t say anything to him.

It was pure silence. A silence that allowed for clear thoughts.

Do you know how long I’ve been keeping an eye on you?

The drive to your father’s company the next day is…quiet to say the least. There’s an air of discomfort around the two of you and you’re unsure of whether it’s due to him having to meet your father or the conversation that will follow. Minghao, much like the night the two of you met and you’d asked about why everyone seemed to disapprove of him, was tense. His hands were set on his knees, squeezing tightly to the point of his knuckles turning white. His head is turned away from you, keeping his gaze on the city as you drive. It makes you nervous. Had you done something wrong? Was he regretting everything?

You swallow hard, mimicking his position and turning to look out the window.

Do you know how long I’ve been keeping an eye on you?

There had been something so off about the way he said that. You still couldn’t quite figure out what it was, and it had your stomach churning uncomfortably.

The feeling only worsens when you pull up in front of your father’s building and Gyuri is standing with Seungcheol. Both look upset, standing straight with their arms folded behind their backs.

“What is this?” Minghao murmurs, thanking the driver quietly when his door opens. You slide out behind him, taking his hand in your own as he helps you stand.

“I’m…I’m not sure what this is.” You admit, your eyebrows knitting together as Gyuri approaches you. “Gyuri, what’s happening?”

“You need to come with me,” she tugs at your arm, attempting to pull you away from your new lover.

“What?” Your hand tightens in Minghao’s, your feet gluing into place. “What— what are you talking about? Gyuri, what’s going on? What is Seungcheol doing here?”

“Y/N,” Seungcheol steps toward you, but Minghao is faster and pushes you behind him. Your hand dislodges from his, and you yelp as Gyuri practically rips you away from him. Your knees hit the ground, skin scraping against pavement. The door of the company building practically flies open, a few police officers filing out with your father taking up the rear.

“Father?” Your throat is closing up, too many emotions pulsing through your body.

“What is this?” Minghao is yelling. People are stopping on the streets to stare. Gyuri and Seungcheol pull you to your fight, and you don’t think you have the strength to stop them. “Y/N, WHAT IS THIS?”

For a moment, you’re afraid. He lunges for you, and two officers grab at him. He looks rabid, his eyes crazed and teeth bared like some animal as he yells and screams and kicks against the people holding him. Your father approaches you, relief replacing the typical stone-cold gaze he gives you.

“What’s happening?” You’re sobbing now, blood washing down your legs. Gyuri is crying with you, and Seungcheol’s hands are shaking.

“Are you alright?” Your father asks. “Did he do anything to you?”

“I— what—” you can’t breathe.

“Xu Minghao,” an officer speaks over the commotion. “You are under arrest for the crimes of criminal harassment, assault and battery, and extortion. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford an attorney—”

“GET YOUR FUCKING HANDS OFF ME—” Minghao’s hand flies out, nearly clipping the officer in the jaw as he finishes speaking.

He yells obscenities, yells for you, at you, at the people around him. He curses wildly, using every name under the sun, threatens death upon everyone.

Do you know how long I’ve been keeping an eye on you?

“I’m sorry.”

Gyuri is sitting on the chair beside you as you get your knees treated. You stare blankly ahead of you, and she turns her head to Seungcheol, silently pleading for help.

“Y/N,” he says slowly, “do you understand what’s happening?”

No response.

“Minghao…we told you he was not the man you thought he was. You fell too hard, too fast, didn’t give us time to tell you everything.”

Silence. Gyuri starts talking again, not knowing if you heard anything they were saying.

“He’s…he was planning on using you, Y/N. Using you to get…to get your father’s company, just like he did with his own father. It…it was all fake. Everything you learned about him, everything we all thought we knew about him…it was all lies. It was in the small details.”

People always said you were innocent. People always called you naive. You trusted too easily, loved even easier. It made it easy to use you, to take everything you had and throw you to the side. Some people of new money were able to gain the respect of those of old money, but you?

No one would ever respect you.

Not after you fell for the gorgeous man, fell for his gorgeous lies and fantasies.

Thinking about him here in this hospital room…

Something about it makes you want to sink and drown and die. Maybe that would be easier.

“Can… can I leave?” you look up at Seungcheol, tears welling in your eyes. He looks heartbroken. “I want— I want to leave, Seungcheol. Can we leave?”

Heartbroken. That’s the look in his eye that you couldn’t recognize last night. It wasn’t anger, it wasn’t the realization that he had lost you.

“We can go. It’s over now.”

195 notes · View notes

dat-town · 20 days ago

Text

the things we see in souls

Characters: Hyunjae & female reader

Setting & genre: Alchemy of Souls au, fantasy, childhood friends to strangers to lovers

Summary: It’s been 10 years since you last saw Jaehyun. Now seeing him again is like meeting a stranger. But what if his arrogance is only a mask to hide his scars and affection?

Warnings: canon-typical violence, monsters, blood, wounds, scars, Hyunjae is quite cocky, verbal and physical abuse from his father, wording/mannerism is not historically accurate, arrange marriages are a thing here, mutual(?!) pining

Words: 10.5k

Author’s note: spin-off to the things we lose in fire but can be read on its own, even without seeing the kdrama too

@lily-blue a year and half later but here it is. i had just as much fun writing this as the Sunwoo one, so i hope you'll enjoy it too. (also see how it's almost 11k?) wishing you all the best for this year too from the other side of the world! <3

It had already been 10 years since you last saw Jaehyun.

You had both been on the verge of turning from careless playful youngsters to the type of adults your parents had wanted you to be, so he had been taken to the capital of Daeho to be trained to be the best mage of your generation under his uncle’s care while you stayed back in the Seoho Fortress to learn about the medical use of herbs to the best of your abilities.

In your memories he was all mud and carefree laughter, mischievous pranks like pulling on your braided hair but a helping hand when you had to climb over walls too high. You had been kids, all innocent and not knowing better, so why is it that now, finally grown into the young woman your parents could be proud of, you feel childlike excitement just thinking of seeing him again. It must be nostalgia, you tell yourself, it cannot be because of those gossips that had made their way down the sea all the way from the busy city to the forest-nestled town of yours.

Jaehyun had certainly gained a reputation. Son of a trade company owner nobleman and nephew of Seo Yul, Jeongjinrak’s leader. The Seo family from the Seoho Fortress might not have had blue royal blood in their veins but they were relatives of the former Queen, so they were treated as such. Rumors said Jaehyun acted like every bit of a prince, all spoiled and self-confident, even though he hadn’t grown up in a palace. They said that he was handsome and one smile of his could sweep a dozen girls off their feet. They also gushed about him being able to master Chisu, the ability to divide and control particles of water already despite his young age.

It sounded like he had gotten quite a bit of attention and it made you nervous. You could only hope that he would still remember you after all these years, that he would recognize you despite how you shredded your youthful features.

You let out a shaky breath as the carriage crossed the capital city walls and you stuck your head out to see the lively market and the cramped buildings, the ladies walking around in colorful skirts and the jewelleries and sweets sold by elderly at wooden stalls. The sight made you smile and you tried to familiarize yourself with your surroundings, your new home. Soon enough busy roads turned into a path through green forest until you reached the high gates of Songrim. You could practically feel magic crackling in the air as the guards opened the protective doors via a magical key to let the carriage inside the mage district of the town. It was the largest and most powerful mage society of the country led by the Park family and it was an honour that you were chosen as its medical institute’s new apprentice.

“You must be Y/N. Welcome to Sejukwon Infirmary,” Lady Heo greeted you kindly as soon as you got off the carriage and she instructed the staff to take your luggage to your room before she invited you in for a meal. While you listened to her introduce the place to you, you couldn’t help but glance down the bumpy road continuing towards Jeongjinrak and wonder what Jaehyun was doing.

Jaehyun was actually not in Jeongjinrak at the time.

Even though mage scholars were strictly advised to stay inside Songrim and only leave for the city if absolutely necessary, especially after curfew, he had long figured out how to tweak the rules in a way to benefit him. Not to mention, nobody dared to stop him as he was the nephew of Jeongjinrak’s leader. Good thing Seo Yul was busy enough not to check on him too frequently. Otherwise he might have scolded him for sneaking out, not that it would have hindered the guy’s advances much, not unless news of his behaviour reached his father’s ears. But since Seo Yul was his mother’s younger brother, Jaehyun doubted that the man would tell on him, especially not to his father.

So it was more of an open secret that Jaehyun and his friends would make a weekly visit at the Chwisonru Courtesan House to indulge in food that wasn’t brought inside Songrim walls, drink rice wine and entertain the ladies regardless whether they were courtesans or ladies sneaking out just like they did. They were all very much interested in the daily lives of mages even if it wasn’t that exciting, especially since the last of Jinyowon’s escaped monsters had been captured. So maybe Jaehyun made up some stories that earned surprised gasps and impressed wows from the enthusiastic audience. He couldn’t really help it, the urge to stand out, the need to be watched and admired was in his blood. Ever since he was a boy, he had been expected to achieve grand things. Anything less was simply not allowed. Being ordinary would have been a disappointment, a fatherly slap well-earned.

So even if it was all just temporary, his company bought on golden coins, their attention on him only for the thrill and free drinks, it was better than nothing, better than never being good enough. At least the insincere compliments and expensive alcohol on his tongue made him feel less miserable, even if only for a night.

“Is it really true that Kim Sunwoo saved you when the nail-eating mouse was on loose?” One of the girls asked, giggling, clearly having had too much wine with how red her cheeks were and how loose her tongue became. Jaehyun’s hand clenched firmer at the cup in his hands and his mood immediately turned sour as he slowly guided his unimpressed gaze to the silly girl.

“I didn’t need saving. Much less his,” he told her, tasting bitterness in his mouth as his thoughts wandered back to the festival which had turned into chaos due to the shapeshifter monster. If it wasn’t enough that he was apparently no match to the boy born with the Firebird’s energy and his equally annoying priestess sweetheart, rumours about what had happened that night had spread quickly. Way too quickly for his liking even though nobody really confirmed what happened.

“Let’s go. I lost my appetite,” Jaehyun stood up quickly followed by Juyeon and Younghoon without question and he ignored the protests at the table as he left a bag of coins behind.

Outside the night air was still warm from the stuffy day but the cold breeze against his face was welcomed. The journey back to Jeongjinrak would have been much faster with horses but they didn’t bother with them mostly because on foot it was easier to go unnoticed as they slipped in and out through a secret door of the walls around Songrim, their footsteps hidden under the plant litter. They had walked on this route countless times and never got caught, so Jaehyun was taken aback when under the moonlight he heard his name called from the porch of Sejukwon.

“Jaehyun? Is that really you?” The female voice sounded again when he turned towards its source. He briefly glanced at his companions to make sure he wasn’t hallucinating but both Younghoon and Juyeon looked just as bewildered as he felt. He could see Juyeon’s hand move to his sword by his side too as the figure leapt towards them carrying an oil lamp with her.

Jaehyun squinted on instinct when the bright yellow light came closer and prying his eyes open, he saw your flushed face. For a moment, he thought that he must have been dreaming because it couldn’t be you. You were supposed to be miles and miles away. And yet, he would have recognized you anywhere without a doubt. That golden sparkle in your eyes and that cute mole under your eyes. Even if you had grown up, even if it had been a decade since he last saw you, he knew that it was you.

“It’s really you. Good. I thought I was imagining things,” you chuckled in such a carefree manner that for once Jaehyun found it hard to speak up. His chest was burning when he saw that you lifted your hand to curl your fingers around the illuminating medal hung on a silver thread around your own neck, a matching pair to his, hidden under his undershirt. Even without checking, he knew that it was also lighting up, signalling your closeness and suddenly his throat felt dry under your watch.

“Hyung? Who is she?” Juyeon asked tentatively, breaking the silence before it could have stretched too long, his hand still on the handle of his sword and Jaehyun wasn’t sure what to tell. What were you exactly? An old friend? A stranger? A daydream?

He gulped before a smug grin made its way over his lips almost out of habit.

“Probably just another girl obsessed with me,” he shrugged and shared a laugh with his friends before looking back at your stunned figure. He could see the hurt in your eyes then the way it slowly morphed into anger, your hand letting go of the medal, letting it fall against your chest.

“So you really did change,” you hissed, disappointment clear in your voice, before shoving the oil lamp against his chest harsh enough to cause a little pain with the metal digging into his skin. Your eyes looked all gold and fierce from that close, just with the lamp between your bodies and Jaehyun had to remind himself to breathe once you turned on your heels and ran back to the infirmary’s building.

“Woah, you really should be more careful not to anger half of the women population in Daeho,” Younghoon noted while he turned down the path and Jaehyun snorted as his fingers curled around the handle of the lamp.

“What can I say? It’s my charm,” he forced a laugh, following his friend but he couldn’t help but glance backwards, wondering what you were doing in Songrim of all places.

However, soon enough he became occupied with other problems because his uncle was waiting for him in front of his room when they eventually got back to the Jeongjinrak dorms.

“You got a letter from your father,” Seo Yul handed over a yellowed envelope, the wax of their family seal unbroken in the middle, once Younghoon and Juyeon scurried into their own rooms after polite and apologetic bows.

“Huh, then he didn’t forget I exist?” Jaehyun muttered under his nose as he took the envelope, waiting for his uncle to say something else, maybe to tell them off for breaking the rules but the man just patted him on the shoulder and told him to get a good night's sleep before his footsteps turned down the hallway.

Jaehyun broke the seal and read the letter about his father’s visit once before throwing the paper into fire to burn until nothing remained from his words, nothing but ash.

You didn’t even know who you were more angry at: Jaehyun or yourself.

Sure, you didn’t expect him to welcome you with open arms as if you were still best friends but the way he treated that night felt like a slap. It would have been bad enough if you believed that he really didn’t realize it was you and this was how he treated every girl but you were sure that he recognized you. Otherwise his eyes wouldn’t have zeroed in on that medal you shared, your farewell gift from ten years ago so you would find each other later. It felt naive now, you felt naive and stupid, hoping for something that never stood a chance, something that only existed in your fantasies. But was it really that wrong of you to hope that he also treasured your time together and kept you in his good memories? At least he was still wearing his piece of the twin medals but maybe that didn’t mean anything. Was he perhaps disappointed when he saw you and that’s why he was so quick to deny your past? Gosh, no matter how much you tried to tell yourself that it didn’t matter, that you shouldn’t have cared, Jaehyun’s conflicted face when he saw you kept haunting you.

“Y/N, careful! The potion is boiling,” Lady Heo reminded you and you snapped out of your thoughts to focus on the cauldron of herbs in front of you before it could have overflown and caused serious burns.

“Sorry,” you mumbled, trying to get your footing again, focusing on your tasks instead of letting your thoughts wander off like they had done ever since that accidental encounter with your childhood playmate and partner in trouble.

It certainly didn’t help that apparently Jaehyun was the talk of the town. Whenever you went out to the market, you heard girls’ whisper about Jeongjinrak students, about Jaehyun’s visuals and whether it was true that he kissed girls breathless in one of the upstairs rooms of the courtesan house. You weren’t even jealous, just annoyed because you couldn’t go anywhere without hearing his name and being reminded of how he had treated you.

No wonder you weren’t exactly delighted when you were asked to join the head lady of the institute on her weekly visit to Jeongjinrak with new supplies but you convinced yourself that the chances of meeting Jaehyun would be low. It was just a quick drop by after all and you were supposed to meet only Seo Yul and nobody else. The institute’s leader was older than his nephew and his features were somewhat softer but you could see the resemblance between him and Jaehyun, especially because you had known his sister, Jaehyun’s mother too.

“Y/N. You have grown up nicely,” he smiled at you kindly as he welcomed you even though it hadn’t been so long since you last met back in Seoho Fortress when he had visited.

“Thank you,” you bowed your head politely before helping Lady Heo pack out the supplies from the bag to the storage room where the man accompanied you. You thought that would be it, you certainly didn’t expect him to ask you about his nephew.

“Have you had a chance to meet Jaehyun?”

“Uhm,” you hesitated, fingers freezing around vials of immunity serums. “No. Not yet,” you lied eventually because no matter how angry you were at Jaehyun, you didn't want to get him into unnecessary trouble.

Seo Yul looked like he wanted to say something else like how you had been close as children but eventually he just nodded and let you finish up quickly without mentioning Jaehyun again. It was a relief, really, because you weren’t sure how many questions it would have taken for you to snap.

You certainly felt close to saying something unlady-like when you caught a glance of the guy anyways while leaving the grounds of Jeongjinrak.

He was walking the opposite direction with a few others, their hanboks in different shades of blue sweeping the ground, carrying an air of confidence and magic with them. Some bowed towards you and Lady Heo without stopping and you did the same, although you couldn’t help your gaze from shifting to Jaehyun’s tall and proud form. His hanbok was the darkest of blue, almost like the midnight you met on. It was lined with silver, just like the double swords on his back. In daylight he looked even more handsome with his fair skin, small nose and delicate features. It was unfair how he had grown up to look like a prince and you wondered whether it was part of the reason why he acted so arrogant. The twin medal burned against your skin as your eyes met briefly and you refused to be the first one to look away knowing that he still wore its pair. But Jaehyun’s eyes were dark and emotionless as he walked away. The burning sensation disappeared with him but the heaviness in your chest didn’t ease up.

You certainly didn’t expect him to seek you out on his own after that but apparently Jaehyun was full of surprises. Literally because you had decided to put the stupid necklace into a wooden box inside your bedside table instead of wearing it as a constant reminder of how little your past friendship, you, meant to him. This way the mage could sneak up on you without you noticing his closeness until you turned around and almost dropped the glass jar from your hands. You let out a surprised gasp when taking a step back in order to avoid bumping into him, you stumbled, almost losing your balance, and if it wasn’t for Jaehyun reaching out to hold onto your waist, stabilizing you, you would have surely made a mess. For a moment too long you were frozen in place, his closeness and touch on you rendering you speechless. He really was nothing like the little boy that lived in your memories. His broad shoulders and the secure hold on the small of your back told you stories of countless practice hours and his eyes now lacked the carefree spirit he had as a kid.

“Let go of me,” you mumbled, both flustered and frustrated, brushing his hand off you with your empty hand. You quickly stepped away and put the jar onto the shelf, busying yourself with checking the others already there. You were just stalling, since you didn’t want to be the one asking Jaehyun why he came. You doubted it was because he felt bad.

“Y/N…” He called your name way too gentle for your heart but you refused to soften so easily.

“Oh, so you do remember me,” you snickered in a mocking tone as you turned towards him but kept your distance. It was just the two of you in the herb room and it was bad enough. Terrible because for the first time since that night encounter two moon phases ago you saw something akin to guilt flash in Jaehyun’s dark eyes before he casted them down but maybe you were just seeing things. “What? Were you embarrassed because of me in front of your new friends? Am I not worthy to be in your circles now?”

“It’s not that,” Jaehyun rolled his eyes but you did not appreciate the gesture.

“What is it then?” You huffed, crossing your arms in front of your chest as if that could be a defensive layer between him and the wild beat of your heart because it wasn’t fair. He wasn’t being fair. He ignored you, he denied knowing you and now here he was refusing to tell you why.

“What are you doing here?” He asked instead, deflecting, as he looked around in the herb room, gingerly touching a bowl of cream you were working on before he showed up. His attitude was seriously pushing your limits.

“Really? Not even a ‘how have you been’?” You scoffed, rolling your eyes. “I should be asking you that because I actually work here. Becoming a healer has always been my dream. Or did you forget that too?”

It felt good, jabbing back at him a bit, trying to make it hurt but it was a losing game because this new Jaehyun was nothing like the boy you once knew.

“Can you stop that?” He snapped, frustration leaking through his words and it made you temporarily content, to be able to trigger an emotion in him. It only egged you on.

“What? Reminding you that you were acting like a shitty friend?”

“We’re not friends anymore,” Jaehyun corrected you sharply, keeping his voice quiet and cold. It silenced you immediately, leaving the room in a tension so thick you could barely gulp. You tried not to show it but his claim hurt more than you would have thought. Maybe you were indeed the only one who treasured your childhood adventures after all.

“Right,” you whispered, voice barely audible, staring ahead aimlessly. You felt something uncomfortable lodged in your chest, something heavy. “Why are you still wearing the necklace then?”

There was no way for you to know that he actually wore it even now without having yours on but based on Jaehyun’s reaction, the way he blinked rapidly, he did.

“I…” He opened his mouth to answer but then closed it without actually elaborating and suddenly you were really tired of this argument. At the end of the day it didn’t matter whether he wore it for sentimental reasons or out of habit. He clearly didn’t think of your connection as fondly as you thought so, hence it was useless to entertain any idea like that.

“Nevermind,” you sighed, wanting to get over it, wanting him away. “What do you want?”

Jaehyun took a moment too long to answer, seemingly mulling over something, but before you could have sent him away for taking so long, he cleared his throat and pulled his fingers across the wooden edge of the desk by his side, a nervous habit of his that apparently he couldn’t shake off since childhood.

“Do you know about the upcoming lunch between our families?”

“Yes, of course. Why?” You hummed because your parents had promised before you had left Seoho Fortress to visit you soon and your father had mentioned that he would like to meet Jaehyun too, to see what kind of man he had grown up to be. Back then you had been excited, happy for the excuse to see him more, for your families to spend more time together just like in the good old times.

But now that you have talked with the guy and how had been treating you in front of his friends, you weren’t exactly enthusiastic about attending but it wasn’t like you had any other choice. Jaehyun seemed to share the sentiment, albeit you weren’t sure about his reason. Not until he added:

“It’s supposed to be an engagement discussion… about us.”

“What?” The shriek leaving your mouth was definitely louder than what you intended but you couldn’t help it. Even the idea of Jaehyun’s claim was ridiculous. Sure, you were at the age to be married off but your parents never really pressured you. They knew how important your medical journey was to you and they supported you without forcing suitors on you. So what was the sudden change of heart? And with Jaehyun of all people? Was it why they allowed you to move to the capital in the first place? Was it all planned?

“My father will propose uniting our families. Just thought you would like to know,” Jaehyun shrugged as he averted his gaze to the open book on the table, his nonchalant behaviour unnerving you even more so. You circled the table until you were across from him and slammed the book closed, successfully earning his attention.

“How are you so calm about this?” You questioned, eyes boring into his. He looked unfazed, almost bored as if he was talking about the weather but you had noticed how his fingers twitched by his side, how he gulped when you leaned closer.

“It’s just an engagement. A lot of things can happen,” he said and the implication behind his words brought burning shame down your spine because you hated how vaguely and nonchalant he spoke. Did he hope that his parents would change their minds and break it off? You knew his father enough to know that there was no sentimentality in his decision, that it wasn’t about the closeness you have had as children. It was most likely because his father had heard about the new success of your father’s shop’s spice and herb export and as a businessman in trade he saw it beneficial. But business could change as fast as the wind.

It left your chest with a hollow feeling that Jaehyun seemed so unbothered about it.

“Just?” You echoed his voice, hating the way your heart skipped a beat at the thought of getting engaged with him before you realized how little he probably cared. It was almost worse than if he had openly hated the idea. “So what? Will you still go back to your courtesans with a ring on your finger?” You blurted out without thinking, without realizing what it would reveal to Jaehyun. He caught on to it too fast though.

“Are you jealous?” He asked with a teasing lilt in his voice, edged with arrogance and a hint of surprise dancing in his eyes like flames. Looking at him suddenly burnt.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” you muttered in a smaller voice, lowering your eyes.

“Am I?” Jaehyun asked, taunting. He leaned forward, balancing himself over his hands on the table, coming so close that you had no choice but to look him in the eyes. Those dark deep pools devoid of childhood playfulness. The mischief in them now was a little mean, a little too serious. “You had an obvious crush on me when we were fifteen. Shouldn’t you be happy?”

Taken aback, you took a sharp inhale, eyes widening at the realization. You had no idea that he had noticed, that he knew that you had been halfway in love with him when he had left. He never said anything and now you were left wondering whether this was the actual reason why you hadn’t met in the last ten years. The betrayal of it tasted like heartbreak on your tongue but you tried to keep as much of your pride as you could.

“Sure. My fifteen year old self would have happily married her best friend but like you said, we are not even friends anymore, we are practically strangers,” you reminded him as deliberately as you could while pulling away, putting some distance between you, so you wouldn’t feel his closeness burn you even without touching. You really couldn’t tell whether your words meant anything to him at all, even if they did, he didn’t show signs of it. “You should leave.”

To your surprise Jaehyun didn’t argue but of course he had to have the last word.

“See you at the weekend, Y/N,” he said as he straightened his back and you refused to look as he turned his back on you, leaving the room as swiftly as he came almost as if he wasn’t there. He left nothing behind, just the turmoil in your heart.

To say the least, Jaehyun wasn’t exactly looking forward to seeing his father again. No wonder he so rarely visited home despite his mother’s nagging. Time and time again his father reminded him that no matter what he was doing, it could never be enough and while Jaehyun knew that his father’s inferiority complex when it came to his mother’s royal relatives or how he couldn’t get a seat in the Unanimous Assembly wasn’t his problem to solve, its cruelty was still deeply integrated in his bones.

The young mage wore his best clothes made from fine silk material and delicate embroidery, its color the exact blue his mother favoured, as he stepped into the holiday mansion where they were supposed to meet. He schooled his expression into an emotionless facade and raised his chin high up, proud and confident, as he followed the servant to the pavilion where the lunch would be served. He greeted his parents with a deep, polite bow when he reached close enough. He avoided his father’s eyes while his mother rushed up to him, putting a hand onto his cheek asking if training was hard on him.

“It does him good. He cannot get lazy,” his father interjected before Jaehyun could reassure the woman and he eventually reluctantly agreed. He hoped the attention would shift from him to other matters as he sat down but he should have known better; his father couldn’t miss out on berating him. “I heard you mastered Chisu recently. Took you a while. You should try harder.”

Jaehyun gritted his teeth, resisting the urge to remind his father that it was a rare skill to have at his age, that in Jeongjinrak there were only a handful of students who could master it by the end of their studies at all.

“Yes, father,” he muttered, fingers clenching around nothing in his lap under the table.

“You better not embarrass me today in front of Ryu Bookmin. We need their alliance,” the man warned him and Jaehyun gulped. He could practically hear your voice echo in his ears asking whether it was really just an engagement to him. The truth was: it wasn’t even that to his father, it was just business and Jaehyun knew that he could change his mind any moment. It made no sense to think too much into it.

“Yes, father,” he repeated like a diligent son would because that was the least Jaehyun could do. Growing up he had been constantly reminded that if he wasn’t the only son of the family, his father would have long kicked him out for being the disappointment he was. Just because his birth constellation, that had been dusting on a shelf in Cheongbugwan, wasn’t too promising, because it didn’t foresee him living a dazzling future. Since being average was punishable, Jaehyun had learned early on to cheat if he couldn’t get first place without it. Even if his father never once told him that he was proud of him no matter what he achieved.

Jaehyun let out a relieved sigh when your family was announced by a servant, putting an end to his humiliating conversation with his father. He stood up from his chair, eyes kept on the lavish table until he heard your approach.

The pulsating warmth from the necklace he wore was missing this time too just like the last time he had seen you and he hated how much something so insignificant could bother him. Jaehyun lifted his eyes at your figure after greeting your parents politely and his breath got stuck in his throat indeliberately.

Based on your previous encounters he could already tell how nicely you had grown into a young woman, all pretty and lady-like and while he had found an almost sick pleasure in making you blush last time, he hadn’t fully realized just how breathtaking you were. With your pink-lilac hanbok, similar colored ribbon in your hair and lips slightly reddened, you had never looked more beautiful. And yet, a part of Jaehyun liked that version of you that had messy strands of hair out of your braid hanging into your face, cheeks flushed and eyes burning with something fierce when you looked at him angrily. It felt raw and honest and he hoped only he could see you like that. Maybe that’s why he blurted it out, that comment about your old crush on him, something he selfishly hoped you never forgot. He wasn’t even sure why he brought it up. He certainly didn’t plan to, but you were so defensive, so clearly worked up by the idea of getting engaged to him that it just slipped out. He had always liked teasing you after all, even as children, even if this time around it wasn’t that much of a joke.

“Y/N… so lovely to see you!” It was Jaehyun’s father who greeted you first after exchanging a few overly honeyed words with your parents, putting you into the center of attention. “How is work treating you at Lady Heo? If it’s hard, we can put in a word for you. She’s family, you know.”

What a not so subtle reminder that the Lee family was just as related to the Heo one as the king’s via the Seo blood and she was practically working for one of their own. So typical. Jaehyun tasted bile in the back of his throat.

“That’s exactly why we’re reassured that she’s in good hands,” your father commented all fawning but Jaehyun kept his eyes on you, watching your expressions closely. You never looked his way and he could tell that it was on purpose, probably because of your last conversation. Still, he could see the slight frown on your face behind the forced smile.

“I’m glad to hear that. Maybe we can soon bring our families closer officially too?” His father noted, again not so subtly and both parties chuckled before the food was served to eat.

While the meal itself was quite nice, much nicer than what Jaehyun could get himself at Jeongjinrak or the courtesan house where he frequented, he found it hard to swallow. Based on how little bites you took, maybe you felt the same.

Your parents, mainly your fathers, talked about the journey to the capital, the new trading roads near Seoho Fortress and mentioned both of your studies. They also exchanged opinions on how big of a havoc the monster attacks caused and Jaehyun’s father couldn’t help but blame Songrim’s leader. Despite the neutral topics, Jaehyun could see that your posture was still as rigid as his.

“The world is such a dangerous place,” your mother shuddered when the rise of black market trade for cursed objects was on topic before putting a hand over yours, patting it gently. “It’s a relief that Y/N has an old friend here in Songrim. I remember how keen on Jaehyun had been to protect our daughter even when they were kids. Like that time, when that antique vase was broken, he took all the blame.”

Jaehyun forced himself to smile at the meant-to-be compliment despite clearly remembering the beating he had gotten from his father that day. It had been better that it was him than you.

“I owe up to my mistakes, madam,” he said, his throat scratchy.

“A responsible young man,” your father noted and Jaehyun could see where this was going. Knowing about it beforehand didn’t change much about his ambivert feelings regarding the matter.

“I’m glad you think so, Ryu-nim, because we would be happy to welcome your daughter into our family. We all know how fond of each other these two were as children and now they are both of a marriageable age, so maybe it’s time to let their fondness flourish,” his father got straight to the point in that ridiculous vague language he tended to use in his business meetings too.

“I couldn’t have said it any better. Let’s drink to that,” your father suggested and as the youngest ones at the table, both of you and him hurried to pour rice wine into the elders’ cups as they started talking about your future as if you weren’t even there, as if your opinion didn’t matter. Jaehyun had already known it wouldn’t, however not even him would have guessed that instead of a long engagement or at least waiting until he finished his mage studies, his parents would want to hold the wedding during the next lunar month as it was said to be a lucky one.

Wide eyed, he snapped out of his own surprise when he heard the creaking sound of a chair moving against the floor and he whipped his head towards you.

“Sorry, I don’t feel too well,” you mumbled and Jaehyun could see the tremors in your hands as you smoothed down the hanbok material before bowing and turning around to walk into the garden.

“Aw, she must feel faint from the sudden news. All this excitement, it’s only natural,” your mother chuckled and Jaehyun couldn’t tell whether she really believed it or she just said it so the Lee family wouldn’t think that you were being rude.

He barely hesitated though before excusing himself from the table to follow you. He found you by the pond, out of your parents’ view with a hand over your heaving chest.

“Y/N…” He called your name gently, trying not to startle you but you still looked taken aback when you turned to him, looking him in the eye for the first time that day.

“You heard that, right? They want us to get married next month,” you spoke in disbelief and while Jaehyun himself wasn’t exactly thrilled either, he wasn’t sure which aspect of it bothered you the most. Was it too soon? Or that you had no say in it? Or that it was him?

“Yes, because of the angle of stars or whatever,” he shrugged because he wasn’t in the position to protest, there was nothing he could have done to change his father’s mind. If anybody, his father would have beaten his own ideas into his head.

Jaehyun had always known he could never fully shake off his father’s control over him but keeping his distance and doing his best to avoid his anger, he could almost forget about it. He would have never expected that when the day of marrying him off came, it would be you of all people on the other side of the table. It made it easier to act docile and yet, it was breaking his heart. You deserved so much better.

“We haven’t seen each other in ten years, you say we aren’t even friends, but you’re really okay with this?” You questioned, frustration building up both in your voice and movements. Jaehyun half wished you would hit him, then he might have felt less guilty about dragging you down, into a family where his father would judge and belittle whoever was by his side.

“It’s not like we have that much of a choice now, do we?” He asked, keeping his voice leveled, standing still and rigid even when you pushed at his chest.

“I hate it,” you hissed harshly and helplessly, sounding sad and mad at the same time and Jaehyun let you punch his chest to relieve your frustration. He deserved your hatred. “I hate it because I will live in a mansion like this but I will be miserable because you will hate me for trying to tie you down.”

Oh, you were so wrong.

“I could never hate you,” Jaehyun whispered as he put a hand over your closed fist against his chest and held it close. With his other hand he reached out and tilted your head up by tapping your chin, so he could look into your shiny doe eyes. You were unapologetically honest, so he could be too. “Look, Y/N, if I have to marry somebody my father chooses for me, I’m glad it’s you.”

It was selfish, so selfish and ironic, because he had been running away from this for the last ten years. This was the reason why he never said anything about your all too sweet lingering gaze when you were younger. The reason why he never went back to see you. He could see his father’s influence on himself, he could almost feel it tangible beneath the rebellion and pressure in the way he enjoyed winning over others, in the way his main motivation was his own greed and he was afraid that he would become like him one day. And what he feared the most was treating you of all people like his father had done with the people around him.

Moments passed and you seemed calmer, your breathing stabilizing, your fingers unclenching under his touch, all warm and lovely, and Jaehyun thought that maybe things would be alright.

“It’s not that big of a compliment as you think it is, Jaehyun,” you sighed, pulling your hand away and somehow his heart ached missing your touch. “I don’t want you to accept me since I’m good enough. I want you to choose me.”

You had fully intended to walk away after that, after blurting out what exactly had been bothering you about the whole situation. After baring yourself in front of Jaehyun like that but when he had called your name, of course you had halted your steps like the weak girl you were.

“You should wear the necklace,” he had simply said and it shouldn’t have made your heart flutter. It was just a stupid necklace after all but still, it connected the two of you in a way no engagement could.

And here you were sitting over some prescription medicine you were supposed to work on at Sejukwon but your hand was playing with the medal on the long string around your neck and your mind was swimming in memories of that last afternoon. You had walked back to the pavilion after you had left Jaehyun by the pond, blaming the heat and the tightness of your dress for the uncomfortable feeling in your chest but expressing how much of an honour it was that they thought so highly of you. You hadn’t acted up, hadn’t said no because at the end of the day Jaehyun had been right: it wasn’t like you had much of a choice. No matter how much you yearned for love and romance, you were your parents’ dutiful daughter and if they bestowed a practical marriage upon you, at least it wasn’t with a stranger. Your feelings for Jaehyun might have been complex, old infatuation festering, a new wariness forming because he was acting cocky and confusing but you knew that he wasn’t a bad person.

The sound of the siren bells ringing ripped you out of your thoughts and you rushed outside to see what was going on. It was the capital’s emergency alert for any attack and like medics on call, Lady Heo and the others quickly got ready to go to the scene with supplies.

“You stay here in case somebody comes for help, we’re going to tend the injured,” the woman said before she left with the servants for the town, towards the source of the sound.

You couldn’t do anything but wait and it was nerve-wracking like no other. You walked up and down the porch, trying not to think of the worst, of the possibility of Jeongjinrak students being dispatched to the scene as well only to get hurt by whatever enemy they faced.

When you noticed a limping man approaching the infirmary, it pulled you back to the present, quieting your worries temporarily. You rushed towards the man to help him but you stopped in your tracks just a few steps away when you noticed that something was off about him. You had never met a soul-shifter before as it was an illegal dark practice of spirit magic but you immediately recognized the symptoms of a soul-hungry shifter with their cracked, discolored skin and darkened veins.

A scream was scratching your throat as you turned on your heels and ran back towards the house, this time with the soul-shifter behind you, grabbing at you. You almost fell when you ran up the stairs of the porch but managed to keep your balance and put some more distance between you before you reached the food storage room next to the kitchen and hid inside, closing the door behind you. With your heart beating wildly in your chest, you had to put a hand over your mouth to suppress your shaky breaths, any sign of life as you heard the wooden floor outside creak beneath the monster’s weight.

A few long moments passed and you thought that maybe he had left but then a knife cut through the door, breaking it down little by little and you couldn’t hold your screams back as you were afraid for your life. You tried to look for some kind of weapon in the small space around you but you came up short while the door was turning less and less of a protective layer between you and the man every second. His hungry eyes and manic grin was already visible through the cracks within the wooden material.

Then out of nowhere your chest started burning with a comforting warmth and the criminal was ripped away from the door.

“Stay there, Y/N,” you heard Jaehyun’s firm voice and you felt like you could have cried from relief but then a moment later worry hit again as you heard noises of scuffle, pained groans and curses.

Just when you couldn’t take it anymore and opened the door, a dishevelled Jaehyun stepped inside the kitchen. He was in front of you at record speed, his sword dropped at your feet as his hands frantically touched your face, looking for injuries.

“Are you okay?” He asked, still panting, dark eyes raking over you after his hands slid down and he held you by the arms.

“Yes, I… I am. Thank you,” you whispered and Jaehyun’s tensed shoulders slumped in relief.

You were unharmed but the earlier shock still kept you alert and that’s how you noticed the bloody spot spreading on the mage’s blue hanbok near his stomach area where it was torn.

“You are hurt,” you pointed it out dumbly, trying to process what you were seeing without panicking.

“It’s fin–” Jaehyun tried to protest but you weren’t having it. You pushed him to sit on the nearest surface and that alone made him hiss.

“Take it off,” you told him with urgency in your tone while clawing at his hanbok, not even thinking about the implications of it until Jaehyun laughed no matter how stained his voice was.

“If you wanted me to undress so badly, you could have just said so,” he tried to joke while shredding off the overcoat layer, grimacing at the pain when he flexed his stomach muscles with the movement.

“Shut up,” you snapped at him, flushed all the way down to the ears and impatient because he was taking too long, you reached for the tied ribbon of his silk shirt to undo it. As its two sides fell apart you could see just how much blood soaked his white undershirt. With a lump in your throat you bunched up the material in your hand and pulled it upwards to actually see the wound but then Jaehyun circled your wrist with his elegant long fingers and stilled your movements.

“Y/N,” he called your name more affected than you would have ever thought he would. It made it harder to look him in the eyes but you pushed down the embarrassment and looked at him. His eyes seemed almost feverish. Was it maybe from the blood loss? “Let me do it.”

He eased his hold on your hand and you let go immediately to run off to fetch some clean cloth, a bowl of water and pain numbing cream. By the time you made it back, Jaehyun was sitting where you left him in only his pants with his bloody clothes in a pile next to him. His bare chest was all golden skin and taut muscles under the dangling necklace and you had to remind yourself to breathe, to focus.

You cleaned the area around the wound to get rid of the drying blood. The wound itself wasn’t too deep luckily but it was a long and ugly cut from a knife, so it would definitely scar even if it was treated immediately.

Both of your hands were bloody and trembling by the time you finished dressing the wound, so you didn’t expect Jaehyun, who had been uncharacteristically quiet until then, to touch you, much less intertwine your fingers with his, making you look up at him.

“I’m glad you are okay,” he said, thumb caressing your palm, the touch so intimate you didn’t know what to do with yourself.

“How did you know?” You asked, not clarifying what you meant but he understood anyway.

“I didn’t. I just wanted to check on you to make sure you were okay,” he said as if it was the most normal thing in the world and you wanted to scold him, tell him not to make your heart flutter if he won’t be there to catch you when you fall.

You pulled your hand out of his hold gingerly and washed the blood off your hands in the bowl of water you brought before, then told him that you would bring him a clean shirt as the infirmary kept some for situations like this.

When you got back, Jaehyun was with his back to you and stepping closer, your eyes widened at the sight, a choked sound nearly escaping your mouth. His lean form was a field of scars, mostly old, whitened criss-cross ones but a few long thin lines looked new and pink. You had treated people from Jeongjinrak before, so you knew it wasn’t from school punishment, not to mention Jaehyun was from a noble family, so nobody would have really dared to lay a hand on him, not like this. Nobody but his own blood.

“Jaehyun,” you whispered, voice breaking even before getting his name out, tears threatening to spill from your eyes.

He looked over his shoulder halfway ready to face you but you didn’t want him to turn around and see you like this, so you put a hand gently on the upper side of his back to stop him. You leaned your forehead against his shoulder with your eyes closed and inhaled in his smell, tracing an old scar with shaking fingers for a while without saying anything..

“I’m so sorry.” Sorry for not knowing, for not being there, for being too self-centered to even consider his side during arguments.

When Jaehyun moved, this time you let him, facing his chest, hand sliding to the necklace in its center, the medal warm under your touch just how it was against your own rib cage over the layer of your hanbok.

“Y/N,” Jaehyun slid a hand to your neck just under your jaw, thumb grazing against your chin as he tilted your head up.

Your breath hitched when your eyes met. There was something vulnerable and soft in his usually mischievous or cold eyes, something rare like a precious gem. You could feel its weight pressed against your chest, his touch eliciting a yearning you hadn’t known before. You could feel heat radiating off him as he stepped dizzyingly close and the way his heart was beating under your palm. Your eyes fluttered closed when his lips touched yours, softly at first, barely there, then when you hummed against his mouth, he pressed in closer, almost hungry like he had been holding back for eons.

“Well, that was way too easy, Lee,” Kim Sunwoo said, unimpressed but clearly intrigued about the reason behind the quick win, as he held out a hand for Jaehyun on the ground. The older just rolled his eyes, swatted his hand away and pushed himself up, his ego more hurt than the wound on his side and his bottom that hit the hard floor of Jeongjinrak’s practice room, so he suppressed a hiss.

“His head is elsewhere,” their teacher noted and Jaehyun would have rather not talked about it. His thoughts were definitely not in that room. They were a few miles West, in a messy kitchen where your hand was on his bare, burning up chest and you were melting against him.

“He’s still recovering, let him be,” Younghoon interjected, ever the peacemaker.

“Right, our hero,” Ji Changmin just had to fake coo which made Jaehyun want to throw something at him.

The soul-shifter’s recent attack was the biggest news lately, so everybody was talking about it. About how the monstrous man had caused havoc in the town square and then had headed towards Songrim because its magic had been pulling him in. Jaehyun had already heard multiple versions of how and why he had shown up at Sejukwon to save the new apprentice but he didn’t bother correcting them. At least his father seemed satisfied with his reputation for once.

“Keep it up, Ji, I can take you down any day, even injured,” Jaehyun warned the boy sternly before their teacher decided to call it a day.

The mage students started packing up, going back to the dorms, calling dibs on first shower rights. Jaehyun walked alongside Juyeon and Younghoon like he always did but his mind still went back to the infirmary and to gentle, tentative touches against his skin.

“So Chwisonru tonight?” One of his friends suggested, clueless, and Jaehyun didn’t even give it a thought.

“I can’t. I have to go to Sejukwon for bandage change,” he declined as if the two activities were mutually exclusive. He couldn’t help it. It would be the first time he saw you after that day. After Lady Heo had showed up suddenly and whisked you away to help with the new patients not caring about what she interrupted. After you had looked back at him with kiss-swollen lips and blown eyes while following the woman. After three long days of stupid bed rest thanks to his overprotective uncle’s orders.

So when he unexpectedly saw you on Jeongjikrak grounds while passing through the inner court to the dorms, Jaehyun had to blink to make sure he wasn’t just seeing things and it was really you. But it was, even the medal pressing over his heart confirmed. He halted his steps, following you with his eyes as were carrying a box and Lady Heo was nowhere to be seen. The mage’s lips were twitching into an amused smile when unaware of their presence you not so subtly looked inside the main building through one of its windows.

“No offence, hyung, but it seems like you’re the one obsessed with her, not the other way around,” Juyeon chuckled teasingly, a shoulder bumping into him at his sudden stop.

Whether it was a coincidence or you heard them, the next thing Jaehyun knew was that you turned around and noticed them, awkwardly bowing in their direction with the box held close to your chest. He didn’t waste any time and changed the course of their path, walking up to you, followed by the others like always. Good, because he wanted to introduce you properly.

“Y/N, these are Kim Younghoon and Lee Juyeon,” he nodded towards his two friends respectively, which you followed with another polite bow even if your confusion was clear on your face. Then he stepped forward and took the box from your hands, his fingers brushing yours before turning to his equally confused mage friends. “Guys, she’s my fiancée.”

“What?!”

“When did this happen?”

The reaction was immediate. Juyeon and Younghoon gave voice to their surprise out loud while you widened your eyes and looked at him like you couldn’t believe your ears. It was quite funny if you ask Jaehyun.

“I will walk you,” he looked at you, ignoring his friends’ eager questions and teasing comments in favor of spending a few minutes alone with you now that he accidentally crossed paths with you. You looked like you were about to protest but the guys took the hint and left first after politely saying their byes.

“Fiancé now?” You raised an eyebrow in question when it was just the two of you and Jaehyun’s face lit up with a cheeky grin.

“Aren’t you?”

“Who are you and what did you do with Lee Jaehyun? Did that soul-shifter get you eventually?” You narrowed your eyes at him but he could tell based on your lips curling up that you actually liked this side of him, the one not trying to push you away. It was clear from the way you smiled when you turned away from him, walking towards the storage room, letting him follow you with the box.

He caught up with you easily, arms grazing as you walked side by side. Jaehyun didn’t say anything and you seemed content with the silence as well until you reached the building where his uncle and Lady Heo were discussing something. You faced him then, asking for the box back and the guy couldn’t miss the opportunity: he let the wooden object be the only thing between your bodies and leaned down close enough to see you blush prettily.

“See you later,” he promised with a cheeky grin and pecked you on the lips just because he could and because you couldn’t really reprimand him with your boss a thin wall away and hands full after he let go of the box.

Jaehyun was pretty satisfied with himself, thinking that he got you wanting more after giving you that little taste, before retreating back to the dorms to take a shower, explaining briefly (only the very must) to his friends about his relationship with you and then headed towards Sejukwon before sunset. He even sat through an unnecessarily long small talk with Lady Heo before the woman told him that you were in the herb room, so he could find you there. The closer he walked, the warmer his chest got and this time he wasn’t sure that it was because of the medal or something else. When he eventually saw you hovering over some purple flower, trying to extract its pollen, he leaned against the doorframe with a smile that made its way onto his face just by looking at your concentrated expression, that adorable pout on your lips he wanted to kiss off.

So when you finally straightened your back, closing the lid on the little jar on the table, he pushed himself away from the doorframe and hugged you from behind, looking over your shoulder. Even though he couldn’t see your face clearly from this angle, based on how easily you relaxed in his hold, he was sure that you expected him to do something like this after sensing his presence. The thought that you might have wanted him close just as much made him feel dangerously content.

“What’s with you for real?” You asked with a chuckle but quickly made sure he knew it wasn’t an objection as if you were afraid of hurting his feelings. “I’m not complaining, it’s nice… just unusual.”

“Can’t I be sweet to my fiancée?” Jaehyun teased because it might have become his new favourite word. You didn’t seem that impressed by his sweet talk though.

“Jaehyun,” your tone turned almost chiding as turned in his embrace and crossed your arms in front of your chest.

The mage student sighed deeply. He knew your confusion wasn’t baseless because up until that day the most affectionate thing he said was that he was glad you weren’t hurt and that he wouldn’t have minded marrying you instead of somebody else if he had to. And then he kissed you without explaining anything about just how long this feeling had been brewing in his heart. But words weren’t his forte, not like this, and he shuddered just at the thought of admitting outright that he missed you and that he wanted you close.

On the other hand, it was you. You who had seen his scars, both physical and not, and still held him close. You who had seen him as a snotty kid and still wanted him after ten years of cruel silence. You with your shy smiles, fierce eyes and gentle touches. If it's for anybody, he could make an effort for you.

“That day when the soul-shifter attacked you,” Jaehyun started with a gulp, not even wanting to think of your screams that he had heard and that fearful look in your eyes. “I was going crazy thinking what could have happened if I got here too late and I realized I don’t want to lose you. Not again.”

Your eyes widened at his admission and a pink hue blossomed on your cheeks before concern took over in your eyes.

“But… What if your father change‒”

“I don’t care. I’m done letting him control my life,” Jaehyun cut you off with a determination he hadn’t felt in a long while. If his father wasn’t happy with him even with him trying his best not to anger him and follow his wishes, then how worse it could be if he actually started doing what he wanted?

Jaehyun reluctantly let go of your waist to reach into his hanbok and pull out the necklace matching yours and put it onto your palm, closing your fingers around it, so you could feel it pulsing in your hand almost as if it was his heart.

“Remember when you asked me why I’m still wearing the necklace you gave me?” He inquired and when you gave him a small, curious nod, he continued: “It’s like keeping a part of my old self, not forgetting who I really am, and I have missed being who I can be with you.”

You smiled so sweetly at his words, your pretty doe eyes filled with so much care and acceptance, that Jaehyun felt like his heart could burst not being able to contain this fond feeling taking over him. It came to him almost like a crushing ocean wave.

“You know how members of the Seo family have a part of their souls kept in a lantern in Seoho Fortress for safekeeping, right? I left mine there before coming here. But Y/N…” He whispered, lowering his eyes to look at your smaller hands in his. Gentle, caring hands that touched him like he was something worthy and loveable. He took a deep breath and looked into your beautiful eyes. “I would give it to you if I could. If you accepted it… me.”

You let out a small sob with wet eyes and Jaehyun couldn’t help a laugh.

“Hey, come on, don’t cry,” he reached for your face to wipe off the escaping tears softly with the pad of his fingers. “Is it that bad?”

“No, it’s…” You shook your head hurriedly and reached for his wrist to hold, his heartbeat loud in his vein against your thumb. “I love you.”

Jaehyun’s breath hitched as he stared at you dumbly, not knowing what to say. So he tried to express what he felt with the way he slowly slotted his lips against yours in a soft kiss. When you smiled against his mouth, he copied the gesture, endeared, and pulled you closer. But as your hands fell to his sides, he tensed up from the pain shooting into his wound and something so small made you pull away immediately as if you couldn’t stand the thought of hurting him.

“I should change your bandage,” you cleared your throat, and you surely meant to be professional now that you remembered the original purpose (excuse) of his visit with that weak attempt of yours to put some distance between you but Jaehyun wasn’t having it.

“Later,” he shook his head and leaned in again but you ducked away with a giggle.

“Jaehyun!” You gasped his name half-scolding, half-giggling.

“What? It hurts here, maybe a kiss would help,” he tapped on his lower lip with mischief clear in his eyes and oh how victorious he felt when you let your lips touch again.

In a world full of monsters and black magic, corrupt politics and business matters overruling feelings, he couldn’t promise you forever. But one thing he knew for sure: his soul, even bare and ugly, was safe in your hands and he would do everything in his power to treasure yours.

#the boyz x reader #tbz x reader #hyunjae x reader #the boyz scenarios #hyunjae scenarios #tbz scenarios #lee jaehyun x reader #stories

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