#Polymorph (Red Dwarf)
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thatsnoneofurdamnbiz · 4 months ago
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some GELF appreciation <3
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smeg-and-the-red · 7 months ago
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the clip in Polymorph of Rimmer's brothers smearing his face with jam and releasing a tin of ants all over him gains an even more sad and sinister note when you remember that in Better Than Life one of the horrible things his brain manifested for himself and Lister and Cat was being buried alive up to their necks with their faces smeared with jam and having ants set loose on them
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nutoka · 4 months ago
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In the episode Polymorph, the bit where Rimmer is watching old home movies from his childhood. It made me think how he’s trying to look back on his childhood with some kind of positive nostalgia. Yes, growing up in that household was smegged up in many ways, but in all honesty it’s the only family he had at the time.
Since he’s dead, he’s trying to look back on his life as worthwhile with some sort of ‘loving’ family growing up. But of course it’s not true so he deceive himself in that aspect.
Back in the Better Than Life episode, it truly hit home that his whole family is dead. I think the show sweeps over Rimmer’s confusing grief because it’s mainly focusing on Lister losing the human race and everyone he known. Yet the same can also be said about Rimmer and how he could be missing civilisation too. But he sweeps it under the rug and focuses on keeping Lister sane as it’s his main mission as a hologram. Therefore making it seem like the whole situation didn’t effect him emotionally and mentally.
But onto my original point, Rimmer had a smegged family but it’s still his family and all of them are dead. In some way it’s relieving for him yet in other ways they were the main people in his life so probably watching those home movies in Polymorph was some sort of comfort to him. Course he knows they weren’t the best of people deep down, that’s why he didn’t yell at Kryten when he called Rimmer’s mother a trout.
I wonder in the episode, Trojan, if there was grief for Howard dying. Probably not since it’s a comedy series but let’s pretend for a minute. Imagine your brother died millions of years ago, came back as a hologram then died again properly saving you. God, the amount of confusing feelings for that would be a psychologist’s dream.
I would want to see someone’s take on this in a fanfic or add on to my mental mess. Basically looking and coming up with a way on how Rimmer felt about his whole family being dead the minute he woke up as a hologram and actually thinking about it in Better Than Life.
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sadiepinesma · 5 months ago
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Always felt sorry that this lil dude hated what he saw in the mirror.
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chickenwaffles17 · 1 year ago
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Hey, should I make it a bit of a challenge to find Rimmer, or just keep doing what I did at the beginning and have him just poorly edited in poking out of something?
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betterthanlif3 · 11 months ago
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A bit of a shift now from Series 1 and 2, excited to see what people vote!
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odo-apologist · 3 months ago
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After finding out Terry Farrell was in it (!!!), I decided to bite the bullet and watch the (2nd) pilot of the U.S. version of Red Dwarf and oof. Yeah. That wasn't great. Lister getting miscast was not a joke, I don't know how they messed him up so badly. However, The Cat might've disappointed me most because of the potential there. Like, Terry Farrell could have Killed It if she was able to portray Cat similarly to Danny John-Jules. One of the best aspects of Jadzia is that Terry Farrell manages to give her such an interesting fluidity in her presentation of her gender and her identity, and that's in part because she plays Dax with such charisma and swagger, the kind of traits I think would work wonders if she got to play a cool, vain, stylish, far-from-courageous ("They're playing our song: the awooga waltz," his cries in the cell during Meltdown, RIMMER calling him a coward) Felis Sapien. Instead, though, we get this whole Brave Warrior Woman "you humans"-ing the other characters, which does not vibe with what The Cat is (okay, The Cat does do some "you humans"-ing too, but I guess it just feels less blatant-probably because it isn't the only bit in the scene when it happens). She doesn't have the charm, she doesn't have the coolness! I don't know, maybe they didn't want to have her look like a stereotype, what with the concern for clothes and appearance that would've come with sticking to the original personality of the character? But honestly, I'd take her lounging around and strutting about in brightly-colored pantsuits, ready to evacuate with her deck-sized wardrobe, over the character they planned for her to be
I'll end this little ramble by saying that while I don't think we're in the Good timeline, we definitely aren't in the worst because we could be living in the the one where Jane Leeves didn't play Dapne Moon and Terry Farrell wasn't Jadzia Dax because they were too tied up in Red Dwarf USA. In that timeline I think Y2K ended up actually happening
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alienintrees · 9 months ago
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constantly thinking about Rimmer's "give quiche a chance" shirt in Polymorph
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spotforme · 7 months ago
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let me share a few ships i think about in the delirious hours of the night
Paranoia and Stabbim (just a skutter acting out orders to kill when it descovers that maybe he's the only one who can get through to the hallucination without making him paranoid, will it reveal it's previous orders and expose it's decietfull job (stabber) and maybe break Paranoia's fragile trust in the process? or do the orders exceed the man (the skutter) and does the ultimate tragic of killing a loved one befall in the hands (claws) of Stabbim when he can't resist orders anymore)
Talkie the Toaster and support force (unrequited love, Talkie ne'er has time to ponder the importance of support force in his life, he knows it excists, but toast will always win out. and support force knows that. it's happy to just hold Talkie up and take any breadcrums it gets as long as it can)
Cat deepthroathing those polymorph eggs (it could've worked out if she hadn't died immediately and he wouldn've killed all her children, but life happens i get it)
the overly polite swordsmen and Rimmer's courage and self confidence (they're making out sloppy style, they spotter eachothers hats and swords from across the room and it has been escalating at an alarming speed)
Sir. Francis Walsingham and the "i am a fish" exam paper (he would gladly be the fish. proxcimity to dear people affecting how one behaves and all that)
Carter Burke and Rimmer (they die a horrible death together, the thought of the other there doesn't comfort them because they know both want to leave the other as a sacrifice and run, so they try to make themselves un-abandonable. doesn't work. they suffer horribly with all hope lost)
The Sister Brothers and the Rimmer Monster (it's lesbian/ gay solidarity as they bitch about the world. my favourite)
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danielfeketewrites · 9 months ago
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Red Dwarf: Polymorph
It's Red Dwarf Day! Nice! Maybe I should finally get around to writing the post about the script I've read like a month ago...
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Oh, Red Dwarf Day was yesterday? Oh well. Anyway - Polymorph.
About two years ago, during my third year of uni, I went to a charity shop and found some Red Dwarf treasures - namely, Red Dwarf Omnibus (which features the first two books, Infinity Welcomes Careful Drivers and Better Than Life, as well as the pilot script) for 1.99 and this, Primordial Soup, for 1.49... An absolute bargain!
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Primordial Soup collects six Red Dwarf scripts, picked as favourite episodes of the two writers (Rob Grant and Doug Naylor, together forming the gestalt entity "Grant Naylor") at the time:
Season 3: Polymorph + Marooned
Season 4: Dimension Jump + Justice
Season 5: Back to Reality
Season 6: Psirens
I still haven't seen all of Red Dwarf, but Polymorph has to be one of my favourite episodes, if not the favourite episode. In these posts, I try to think of something I've maybe learned from reading the script and such. But here? I think the lesson is - if you already have a TV show (or a storytelling platform of any kind for that matter), just have fun with it! Don't get bogged down by what the series is or should be and do something stupid instead! Are you doing a silly character-based comedy? JUST ADD THE FUCKING THING FROM JOHN CARPENTER'S THE THING. Yeah, of course, that tracks.
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You've got to admit - sitcoms don't tend to have an actual sense of danger. And yes, by the time we get to the scene with Rimmer's mother, that danger isn't really there any more, but I really think there was some. And there certainly is some again in the ending. (Although, admittedly, I prefer the other ending, as it was the first version of Polymorph I've seen. But yeah, the script ends with a "Lister" - his head spins around while his body is static, then he grins into the camera and walks off... Properly sinister stuff. This episode really is John Carpenter's The Thing as a sitcom.)
Alright, there's one more thing to learn here. It all comes back to something my teacher at uni said about writing sitcom characters - base them around their flaws. And what might those flaws be? Start with seven deadly sins.
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While not all of the negative emotions eaten by Polymorph are on this list - some of them definitely are. And you can see how Polymorph was created as a specifically sitcom threat, as by removing "negative emotions", we remove who those characters really are. Polymorph, with a surgical percision, is a mutant designed to eat sitcoms.
It's not just a sci-fi parody, it's genuinely clever. Also, it's a good way to approach an ensemble episode, ie one where the focus isn't on a single member of the cast, the focus is on the whole crew.
So yeah, Polymorph is great. What a surprise.
As I've already mentioned, I read this script from a published collection. Which means it wasn't formatted properly... But that's probably a good thing, as Red Dwarf was very likely written in the older format of a studio script, which is just a pain to read. So, on this occasion, I prefer it that way. We're probably gonna get around to me ranting against some of the formatting in published scripts in the future.
Anyway, I'm gonna end this post with the scene that made me burst out laughing. It's the afforementioned scene with Rimmer's mother. I did remember a lot of the jokes in Polymorph, but not this one and it really caught me off guard in the best possible way. Enjoy!
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gothwizardmagic · 2 years ago
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i think red dwarf is the only show on the planet where an a/b/o au would be less weird than the canonical mpreg
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choccos-aaart · 10 months ago
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Astra vs the Polymorph #1 - A glimpse into the lives of class B-5!
DESCRIPTION: The crew's just chilling.
CHARACTERS: All of class B-5, polymorph
KEY WORDS: Comedy, survival "horror"
EXT. OUTER SPACE
A pod appears floating around in space. As it rotates, the pod reveals a hole on its surface, torn open by force.
SFX: Beep, beep…
NARRATOR: Danger. Do not attempt to open this pod. The creature inside is extremely hostile. It feeds off the human psyche, seeks out the deranged, the unbalanced and the emotionally crippled.
SFX:  Beep, beep…
INT. DINING ROOM.
Aries, Quitterie, and Yun-Hua play a game of cards. They are playing Lucky 9, gambling with a collection of shiny pebbles and rocks they found on a previous planet. Aries, with the most pebbles, is the banker. Funicia spectates.
ARIES: Who wants another card?
QUITTERIE: No thanks. My cards are too good for this dang game. I'm gonna beat all of you.
YUN-HUA: Hey-! Isn't it us against Aries...?
QUITTERIE: Oh right, yeah. Whoops.
ARIES: Hm. Quitterie, if you wanna be the banker next round, I'll let you.
QUITTERIE: That's what I've been saying this whole time! 
ARIES: Really?
QUITTERIE: OMG, yeah duh! How'd you not hear me?
ARIES: I mean, all your yapping sounds the same to me, tee-hee!
QUITTERIE: (Gasp!) O-M-G! You're so gonna pay for that!
ARIES: Alright! How about a deal? If the two of you beat me this round, you get to be banker.
YUN-HUA: 'Kay
QUITTERIE: What! That is so unfair!
ARIES: Ok! How about you Funi? Join us!
FUNICIA: Ok!
QUITTERIE: Um, let's not teach gambling to a fourth-grader.
ARIES: Aww, it's not like we're playing with real money so it's totally fine!
QUITTERIE: Alright, fine! But I'll add to the deal. (Smirks) If Funi beats all of us, I get to be the banker!
ARIES: (With mild sarcasm, except with her usual enthusiasm) Oh, you're not just getting Funi involved for your own gain, are you?
QUITTERIE: Alright, then Funi and I get to be bankers. How's that?!
ARIES: (Cheerfully) It's a deal! But we have to restart the round because Funi's with us now.
QUITTERIE: NOOO! 
INT. KITCHEN
Luca sits on a kitchen counter while Ulgar, gun in hand, stands in front of him. Luca seems enthusiastic. In the background, Kanata does his cleaning duties.
ULGAR: Lesson one.
LUCA: Man, oh man, this is so exciting! 
ULGAR: Shut up.
Ulgar holds out his hands as if he's about to clap.
ULGAR: Now hold your hands like that.
Luca holds up his hands.
ULGAR: Now clap.
Luca smiles doubtingly. He claps.
ULGAR: Faster.
Luca claps again, faster.
ULGAR: Now as fast as you can.
Luca hesitates then claps again with extra strength. But, before his hands could meet, Ulgar pulls his gun between them. Luca exclaims with astonishment.
ULGAR: Now you try.
Ulgar puts out his hands and starts clapping at random intervals. Luca stares confusedly.
LUCA: Hey what the hell! I don't know when you go!
Ulgar smirks.
ULGAR: That's just real life.
LUCA: C'mon man, I thought I asked you to teach me to shoot, not play red hands or something.
ULGAR: This is... serious. It's reflexes.
LUCA: Damn, you didn't even have this whole thing planned. Boo!
ULGAR: Reflexes are important!
LUCA: Yeah, whatever! ...Unless, this is just some excuse to spend some nice recreational time with your best friend. That's oddly sweet of you, Ulgar!
Ulgar's face turns slightly red.
ULGAR: Shut up! I'm teaching you to shoot.
LUCA: Then teach me to shoot, man! Where d'you get these lesson ideas from?
Ulgar doesn't say anything.
LUCA: ... So? 
ULGAR: ...Ugh. Forget it.
Kanata looks back from wiping the stovetop.
KANATA: No way! Ulgar, you're referencing a cowboy movie!
ULGAR: Shut up.
KANATA: Oh dude! I got some cool old westerns stored in a drive somewhere. We totally gotta watch them sometime!
ULGAR: Shut up!
LUCA: (To Kanata) Yeah, get back to cleaning!
KANATA: BRO! You guys are supposed to be helping us, too! You got time to lean, you got time to clean - now let's go boys!
He continues wiping the counter.
ULGAR: Hmph.
LUCA: "Us"? I thought you were doing everything yourself.
KANATA: Damn it, where's Charce?! Mr Perfect pretty-boy better not be checking out his reflection or somethin'
Charce carries a pile of dishes over to the sink.
CHARCE: What?
KANATA: Oh good! Thanks so much for the help!
INT. DINING ROOM
Aries, Qitterie, Yun-hua and Funicia continue playing Lucky 9.
ARIES: Uh-oh you guys~ My cards are looking kinda good!
QUITTERIE: I got crap cards... Gimme another card please!
YUN-HUA: Ohh... I would like another card too, please.
Aries tosses Yun-Hua and Quitterie a card each. Quitterie squints in disappointment. So does Yun-Hua.
FUNICIA: I'm happy with mine!
QUITTERIE: Are you sure you know what you're doing?
FUNICIA: Yup! I've seen you guys play so I'm sure I know enough
ARIES: Ok! Three, two, one, REVEAL!
Everyone tosses her cards on the table. Quitterie and Yun-Hua more shamefully than the rest.
QUITTERIE: Seven.
YUN-HUA: Ten...
ARIES: Six!
QUITTERIE: Hold on, did you say six? WHAAAAT!!!
ARIES: HA-AH-AH-Ah-AH-AH-AH-AH!!!
Quitterie shakes Yun-hua's shoulder with defeat and desparation.
QUITTERIE: GIIIRRRLLL! We cou'dve beaten Aries if you didn't ask for that other card!
YUN-HUA: Oh, I'm sorry! She just looked so confident, I wasn't so sure if I should've gambled or not...
ARIES: This is a bluffing game, silly! 
YUN-HUA: Aw...
QUITTERIE: Funi! How about you?
FUNICIA: Mine add up to twelve.
We see Quitterie on the floor, defeated. She sighs massively.
QUITTERIE: ...Yun-Hua, this is all your fault, so as a consequense, you gotta tell us a secret!
YUN-HUA: U-uh...
Quitterie sits up.
QUITTERIE: I'll make it easier for you! How about... Tell us something totally embarrassing you did when you were 13.
YUN-HUA: Oh gosh...
Aries, Quitterie, and even Funicia smile at Yun-Hua eagerly.
YUN-HUA: Oh… Ok…! Um…
She pauses for a moment. Suddenly…
YUN-HUA: Oh, I need to go to the bathroom…!
ARIES: Aww, what?
QUITTERIE: Nice excuse, girl! C’mon, let us hear it!
YUN-HUA: No, I’m serious! 
QUITTERIE: You’re trying to avoid answering, aren’t you?
YUN-HUA: I promise, I’m not trying to avoid anything! I’ll be right back.
ARIES: Really?
YUN-HIA: No, really!
QUITTERIE: Okay~
YUN-HUA: Besides…! I can’t think of anything right now, but maybe when I come back I’ll give you something good. Really! Okay?
QUITTERIE: Hah… Whatever you say. We’ll be waiting!
INT. CORIDOOR.
Zack, walks down the hallway. He notices Kanata. Over to Kanata, we see him dust off his pants.
KANATA: Whew! That was fun! (pause) Huh? Hey Zack!
ZACK: Kanata, I need to talk to you in private.
KANATA: ‘K!
INT. ZACK'S ROOM
Zack leads Kanata inside.
KANATA: So! Wussup?
ZACK: There appears to be a non-human life form aboard this ship.
KANATA: What?
ZACK: Our ship has been invaded by an alien.
KANATA: I know that but… What does it mean?
ZACK: I don’t know. However, it could be hostile so we must be alert.
KANATA: Alright! I’ll keep my eyes peeled from now on!
ZACK: Good. And so will I!
KANATA: We gotta let the others know. At a good time. When d’you think?
ZACK: Hm… Let’s see… In ten minutes from now, it should be-
A quiet, tense conversation can be heard from another room alerts Kanata and Zack.
??? (from another room): So you didn’t know I even came on this trip?
YUN-HUA (from another room): I’m s-sorry! I didn’t mean–
??? : Enough. I don’t want to hear another measly excuse from you.
KANATA: What n’ the… Someone’s talking down Yun-Hua…!
ZACK: But who?
YUN-HUA: (To ???) Oh… I’m really sorry!
KANATA: He doesn’t sound like anyone here. How…?
ZACK: I don’t know… Unless…
???: (to Yun-Hua) Stop apologising. Is this really how guilty you feel?
YUN-HUA: Y-yes…
ZACK: That is the alien…!
???: (To Yun-Hua) Just how guilty do you feel?
KANATA: Then we have to hurry! Let’s go!
YUN-HUA: (To ???) Awfully, awfully guilty…!
Kanata and Zack run in the direction of Yun-Hua’s voice.
???: (To Yun-Hua) INDEED, YOU DO!
Cut to: Kanata and Zack arrive at the scene. Yun Hua lies unconscious on the floor. 
TO BE CONTINUED...
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jaxitaxibolehlaf · 2 years ago
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I'm just going to leave this here...
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Do what you want with it , my dear smeggers 🫡
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dande1ion-daze · 1 year ago
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do Rimmer and Lister ever genuinely called each other by their first names? Ive looked up till season 8 but everytime they use each other first name its in jest, an act, part of their full name, a dream or they were not themselves in some way.
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themaresnest-dumblr · 2 years ago
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OK, have now watched that ‘Max’ episode of Stranger Things, Season Four, Episode Four, and it is by far the most overrated and ludicrous of the lot. It’s not bloody bogeymen from the upside down she should be having visions of, it’s jumped sharks.
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First up, the premise this hardboiled ginger nut had some secret guilt about Billy’s death.
Oh please!
The p**ck physically as well as verbally abused her every chance he got for years, and we’re supposed to believe she’s all torn up inside because he did one decent thing in his whole oxygen stealing existence?
Real people in the real world don’t behave like that. The only regrets they usually feel is never applying a sledgehammer to their tormentor’s worthless skulls when they had the chance. Eleven’s behaviour towards her tormentors: realistic. Max’s behaviour: baloney.
Besides, Max is someone who treats the people she likes as disposable pick ups and drop downs like toys as it is (especially her supposed boyfriend), and openly admits to her councillor the death of Billy had the bonus of ridding her of her equally violent and abusive stepdad. Does that sound like someone that’s gonna have a moment’s regret over Billy’s fetid carcass going to the Oldest Recycling Centre?
It’s not that she is incapable of caring, but she’s an atypical survivor of a toxic environment, ergo her own needs override just about much else - and that kind of mindset takes years (and more than a few long dark nights of the soul) to change
Finally, the whole dumb arse notion of her being into Kate f**king Bush ... again, history matters.
Skater kids haven’t changed much since the days the slim boards were replaced by the giant sawn off ironing boards more familiar to the current generations. They like fast aggressive music for a reason - when doing a highly physical hobby with some physical risks, you want to listen to stuff that gets the adrenaline pumping, not f**king ‘Clair de lune’ by Debussy!
On the other hand, skater kids wouldn’t want to be into the same stuff as the macho meatheads into heavy metal or hard rock, so ‘old school’ punk like the Buzzcocks, Dead Kennedys, Ramones, the Vandals, the Damned and others loved by the counterculture of the day was their bag - later morphing into the likes of Green Day, Offspring, Rancid, etc.
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The reality is someone like Max would be more likely to find Kate Bush the antithesis of her sensibilities, a self-indulgent posh bird from England disappearing up her own lilywhite world arse. And the album ‘Hounds Of Love’ is just about the most offensive it would have been possible to get for a skater girl (had she even heard of it - both it and ‘Running Up That Hill’ only reached No.30 on the Billboard charts, and only gained any sort of traction around Ivy League university campuses. The nearest most Americans had to intellectualism in music at that time was Cyndi Lauper’s ‘Time After Time’ ...). It was slaughtered in the American press at the time as ‘something only English ears would like’, with Rolling Stone (at that time still considered the bible of the zeitgeist in the USA) being particularly scathing.
In 1984, after the major financial disaster for EMI caused by the flop of her ‘disappear up my own arse’ album The Dreaming (one result of which being its proposed merger with British Aerospace collapsed when Thorn EMI profits doozied), she’d been presented with much the same diktat CBS have given The Clash under similar circumstances three years earlier - ‘you’ve twelve months to present us with a commercially viable album plus a bonus track for a projected Greatest Hits album to make good on our losses - or your contract’s terminated.’
‘Hounds Of Love’ did the job in spades, even if ‘Cloudbursting’ (the latter with no less than Donald Sutherland in the video) wasn’t the monster global hit EMI was sure it would be, that long sought after next ‘Wuthering Heights’ which would always elude them until, ironically thirty six years too late later.
Bottom line: the idea of Max turning into some secretly sensitive Kate Bush fan is baloney covered in a thick WTF sauce, and a sign the shows writer’s were not merely out of ideas but by season four butt lazily lapsing into self-indulgence. The whole notion of some supernatural alien whatever supervillain killing people after feeding off their guilt is stolen wholesale off the famous Polymorph episode of Red Dwarf, for crying out loud. The whip crack sound of the tentacles that ensnare Max when in her own nightmare is the exact same sound used by the tentacles in the Apocrypha in The Elder Scrolls V Skyrim: Dragonborn!
(Come to that, much of that whole nightmare world looks suspiciously like bits of the Apocypha and the Soul Cairn ...)
The first two seasons of this show were great, the third one a curate’s egg, but this last one is starting to wear thin half way through the bingewatch, rather like one of those video games franchises like Far Cry which doesn’t know when it needs to take a break and breathe for a bit.
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celery505 · 1 year ago
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I forgot to say I finished the red dwarf omnibus now!
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