#Plain Lobster

[menubot]

Welcome to 1851! Why not enjoy some Plain Lobster at American House? http://menus.nypl.org/menus/21075

[pegglefan69]

planning on dyeing a bunch of white yarn in my stash with the onion skins I saved from the local farm last year, then knitting a vest out of it...planning even further ahead to try & dye yarn with some of their beets & marigolds too later this year... I think it'd be really cute to have an ongoing 'farm vest' project >:^)

[alukaforyou]

my grandma passed away a couple of years ago and let me tell you the fucking relief i felt when she did...i had lived with her most of my adult life while i had two cats both with serious digestive health issues. every single day i had to berate her for feeding human food to those cats. she did not give a fuck. she would "accidentally" spill fries, hot dogs, fritos, chicken skin, anything. ANYTHING. and they got sick every single time. and she was constantly complaining about them being sick. it destroyed our relationship. there were other factors of course but this was really the crux of it. and she died miserable and lonely. of course i love to spoil my cats (for example it was my kittens bday recently so i bought a lobster tail boiled it and split it btwn all my cats and they lost their minds over it) but there is a limit and you need to do your fucking research and you need to respect what their owner says!!!!! i empathize with you greatly and i am wishing your shitty grandmother a speedy death for the sake of you your cats and the rest of your family.

my cats r p healthy for now and havent rly gotten sick eating god knows what from her but me & my sis are so paranoid every day we are out of the house like what is she feeding them now. literally WHAT is stopping her from listening to logic. like u kno what ur doing is bad right? u kno ur not supposed to be doing it cuz ur sneaking around. SO WHY ARE U DOING IT!! theres just like a lot of other issues w grandma that i cant even get into rn but i am so mad she is potentially endangering my cats :/ creamy doesnt rly eat ppl food (unless its meat) but crunchy will eat bread crumbs, fruit, anything :/ also she will? not hold them properly? and take them out to our balcony??? at night?!!! so they can get a good night time view like hello. i am scared they will jump out of her arms and go missing :/ i have them chipped but still!!!! i hate that lady sm. literally does whatever she wants.

[bogleech]

Opinions on the new Splatoon character featured in the upcoming Side Order update? (no idea what it is)

Oh my god is that a LUCIFER???!?!!!

......As in an obscure genus of darkness-dwelling planktonic crustaceans!

There are other transparent marine crustaceans with stalks eyes, like this mantis shrimp larva and spiny lobster larva:

...But Splatoon friend really emphasizes stalk-eyes as THE standout feature on an otherwise plain skinny body, and if they based a character on a larva I might expect it to be more kid-coded, though you really never know how Splatoon might decide to stylize a given animal. Also I say "darkness dwelling" because not all creatures like this are just "deep sea." Lucifer stay fairly deep during the day but they rise almost to the surface at night, as do lots and lots of other sea creatures. They just go where the dark goes! UPDATE apparently the character outright shares the lucifer shrimp's Japanese name, dream-shrimp!

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Leveraged buyouts are not like mortgages

I'm coming to DEFCON! On FRIDAY (Aug 9), I'm emceeing the EFF POKER TOURNAMENT (noon at the Horseshoe Poker Room), and appearing on the BRICKED AND ABANDONED panel (5PM, LVCC - L1 - HW1–11–01). On SATURDAY (Aug 10), I'm giving a keynote called "DISENSHITTIFY OR DIE! How hackers can seize the means of computation and build a new, good internet that is hardened against our asshole bosses' insatiable horniness for enshittification" (noon, LVCC - L1 - HW1–11–01).

Here's an open secret: the confusing jargon of finance is not the product of some inherent complexity that requires a whole new vocabulary. Rather, finance-talk is all obfuscation, because if we called finance tactics by their plain-language names, it would be obvious that the sector exists to defraud the public and loot the real economy.

Take "leveraged buyout," a polite name for stealing a whole goddamned company:

Identify a company that owns valuable assets that are required for its continued operation, such as the real-estate occupied by its outlets, or even its lines of credit with suppliers;

Approach lenders (usually banks) and ask for money to buy the company, offering the company itself (which you don't own!) as collateral on the loan;

Offer some of those loaned funds to shareholders of the company and convince a key block of those shareholders (for example, executives with large stock grants, or speculators who've acquired large positions in the company, or people who've inherited shares from early investors but are disengaged from the operation of the firm) to demand that the company be sold to the looters;

Call a vote on selling the company at the promised price, counting on the fact that many investors will not participate in that vote (for example, the big index funds like Vanguard almost never vote on motions like this), which means that a minority of shareholders can force the sale;

Once you own the company, start to strip-mine its assets: sell its real-estate, start stiffing suppliers, fire masses of workers, all in the name of "repaying the debts" that you took on to buy the company.

This process has its own euphemistic jargon, for example, "rightsizing" for layoffs, or "introducing efficiencies" for stiffing suppliers or selling key assets and leasing them back. The looters – usually organized as private equity funds or hedge funds – will extract all the liquid capital – and give it to themselves as a "special dividend." Increasingly, there's also a "divi recap," which is a euphemism for borrowing even more money backed by the company's assets and then handing it to the private equity fund:

https://pluralistic.net/2020/09/17/divi-recaps/#graebers-ghost

If you're a Sopranos fan, this will all sound familiar, because when the (comparatively honest) mafia does this to a business, it's called a "bust-out":

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bust_Out

The mafia destroys businesses on a onesy-twosey, retail scale; but private equity and hedge funds do their plunder wholesale.

It's how they killed Red Lobster:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/05/23/spineless/#invertebrates

And it's what they did to hospitals:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/02/28/5000-bats/#charnel-house

It's what happened to nursing homes, Armark, private prisons, funeral homes, pet groomers, nursing homes, Toys R Us, The Olive Garden and Pet Smart:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/06/02/plunderers/#farben

It's what happened to the housing co-ops of Cooper Village, Texas energy giant TXU, Old Country Buffet, Harrah's and Caesar's:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/05/14/billionaire-class-solidarity/#club-deals

And it's what's slated to happen to 2.9m Boomer-owned US businesses employing 32m people, whose owners are nearing retirement:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/12/16/schumpeterian-terrorism/#deliberately-broken

Now, you can't demolish that much of the US productive economy without attracting some negative attention, so the looter spin-machine has perfected some talking points to hand-wave away the criticism that borrowing money using something you don't own as collateral in order to buy it and wreck it is obviously a dishonest (and potentially criminal) destructive practice.

The most common one is that borrowing money against an asset you don't own is just like getting a mortgage. This is such a badly flawed analogy that it is really a testament to the efficacy of the baffle-em-with-bullshit gambit to convince us all that we're too stupid to understand how finance works.

Sure: if I put an offer on your house, I will go to my credit union and ask the for a mortgage that uses your house as collateral. But the difference here is that you own your house, and the only way I can buy it – the only way I can actually get that mortgage – is if you agree to sell it to me.

Owner-occupied homes typically have uncomplicated ownership structures. Typically, they're owned by an individual or a couple. Sometimes they're the property of an estate that's divided up among multiple heirs, whose relationship is mediated by a will and a probate court. Title can be contested through a divorce, where disputes are settled by a divorce court. At the outer edge of complexity, you get things like polycules or lifelong roommates who've formed an LLC s they can own a house among several parties, but the LLC will have bylaws, and typically all those co-owners will be fully engaged in any sale process.

Leveraged buyouts don't target companies with simple ownership structures. They depend on firms whose equity is split among many parties, some of whom will be utterly disengaged from the firm's daily operations – say, the kids of an early employee who got a big stock grant but left before the company grew up. The looter needs to convince a few of these "owners" to force a vote on the acquisition, and then rely on the idea that many of the other shareholders will simply abstain from a vote. Asset managers are ubiquitous absentee owners who own large stakes in literally every major firm in the economy. The big funds – Vanguard, Blackrock, State Street – "buy the whole market" (a big share in every top-capitalized firm on a given stock exchange) and then seek to deliver returns equal to the overall performance of the market. If the market goes up by 5%, the index funds need to grow by 5%. If the market goes down by 5%, then so do those funds. The managers of those funds are trying to match the performance of the market, not improve on it (by voting on corporate governance decisions, say), or to beat it (by only buying stocks of companies they judge to be good bets):

https://pluralistic.net/2022/03/17/shareholder-socialism/#asset-manager-capitalism

Your family home is nothing like one of these companies. It doesn't have a bunch of minority shareholders who can force a vote, or a large block of disengaged "owners" who won't show up when that vote is called. There isn't a class of senior managers – Chief Kitchen Officer! – who have been granted large blocks of options that let them have a say in whether you will become homeless.

Now, there are homes that fit this description, and they're a fucking disaster. These are the "heirs property" homes, generally owned by the Black descendants of enslaved people who were given the proverbial 40 acres and a mule. Many prosperous majority Black settlements in the American South are composed of these kinds of lots.

Given the historical context – illiterate ex-slaves getting property as reparations or as reward for fighting with the Union Army – the titles for these lands are often muddy, with informal transfers from parents to kids sorted out with handshakes and not memorialized by hiring lawyers to update the deeds. This has created an irresistible opportunity for a certain kind of scammer, who will pull the deeds, hire genealogists to map the family trees of the original owners, and locate distant descendants with homeopathically small claims on the property. These descendants don't even know they own these claims, don't even know about these ancestors, and when they're offered a few thousand bucks for their claim, they naturally take it.

Now, armed with a claim on the property, the heirs property scammers force an auction of it, keeping the process under wraps until the last instant. If they're really lucky, they're the only bidder and they can buy the entire property for pennies on the dollar and then evict the family that has lived on it since Reconstruction. Sometimes, the family will get wind of the scam and show up to bid against the scammer, but the scammer has deep capital reserves and can easily win the auction, with the same result:

https://www.propublica.org/series/dispossessed

A similar outrage has been playing out for years in Hawai'i, where indigenous familial claims on ancestral lands have been diffused through descendants who don't even know they're co-owner of a place where their distant cousins have lived since pre-colonial times. These descendants are offered small sums to part with their stakes, which allows the speculator to force a sale and kick the indigenous Hawai'ians off their family lands so they can be turned into condos or hotels. Mark Zuckerberg used this "quiet title and partition" scam to dispossess hundreds of Hawai'ian families:

https://archive.is/g1YZ4

Heirs property and quiet title and partition are a much better analogy to a leveraged buyout than a mortgage is, because they're ways of stealing something valuable from people who depend on it and maintain it, and smashing it and selling it off.

Strip away all the jargon, and private equity is just another scam, albeit one with pretensions to respectability. Its practitioners are ripoff artists. You know the notorious "carried interest loophole" that politicians periodically discover and decry? "Carried interest" has nothing to do with the interest on a loan. The "carried interest" rule dates back to 16th century sea-captains, and it refers to the "interest" they had in the cargo they "carried":

https://pluralistic.net/2021/04/29/writers-must-be-paid/#carried-interest

Private equity managers are like sea captains in exactly the same way that leveraged buyouts are like mortgages: not at all.

And it's not like private equity is good to its investors: scams like "continuation funds" allow PE looters to steal all the money they made from strip mining valuable companies, so they show no profits on paper when it comes time to pay their investors:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/07/20/continuation-fraud/#buyout-groups

Those investors are just as bamboozled as we are, which is why they keep giving more money to PE funds. Today, the "dry powder" (uninvested money) that PE holds has reached an all-time record high of $2.62 trillion – money from pension funds and rich people and sovereign wealth funds, stockpiled in anticipation of buying and destroying even more profitable, productive, useful businesses:

https://www.institutionalinvestor.com/article/2di1vzgjcmzovkcea8f0g/portfolio/private-equitys-dry-powder-mountain-reaches-record-height

The practices of PE are crooked as hell, and it's only the fact that they use euphemisms and deceptive analogies to home mortgages that keeps them from being shut down. The more we strip away the bullshit, the faster we'll be able to kill this cancer, and the more of the real economy we'll be able to preserve.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/08/05/rugged-individuals/#misleading-by-analogy

[elinorasims]

Build | Strangerville | Ziggy's Diner

Lot Info

Type | Restaurant Lot Size | 30x20 World | Strangerville Value | 94,857 Baths | 3 CC | No Packs | Unrestricted Ziggy's Diner is a classicly retro mashup of Googie and passenger train inspired styles situated in Strangerville Plaza.

Ziggy's is a compact restaurant and bar combo with a Strangerville twist: classic red booths and an elongated mid-century modern bar layout meets sci-fi inspired and 50's-kitsch inspired cluttered decor..

It's giving the diner from the movie 'Paul'. I hope. lol

Ziggy's has a fully customised menu featuring some Mountain States inspired comfort dishes and some American classics (full menu below the cut).

DOWNLOAD >>

Interior Tour

Bar

Staff Areas

Floor Plan

| hi my loves

hopefully you like this one- it was super fun to build and I'm finding my feet a bit more building for this save, i think!

it's been playtested (briefly lol) and should be fully functional and a smooth enough restaurant experience for your sims to enjoy.

i love Paul so much aha we watched it this past weekend and i was immediately like 'yup. gotta go do a strangerville build now.'

| dag dag fn. <3

Ziggy's Diner Menu

Drinks water ; lemonade ; milk ; orange juice ; coffee ; cream cola ; fizzy fruity drink ; pitch black ; root beer float ; soda ; tang and zing ; boiler room ; eapa ; juice on the rocks ; wrench ; galactic vita-water ; silent film ; sour punch ; sunset valley ; alien juice ; cupid juice ; space energy drink ; jet juice

Appetisers chips and salsa ; mac and cheese ; bowl of olives ; bread roll ; french fries ; whole wheat bread ; popcorn shrimp ; garden salad ; cheesy bread ; grilled plantains ; seafood chowder ; soft shell crab cake ; empanadas ; watermelon salad

Mains mac and cheese ; chicken nuggets ; popcorn shrimp ; baked potato ; hot dog ; lobster roll ; veggie burger ; chicken and waffles ; fried chicken sliders ; mushroom waffles ; sausage and peppers ; scrambled eggs with bacon ; seafood chowder ; tofu dog ; fish tacos ; hamburger ; fried fish ; pancakes ; aubergine Parmesan ; sweet corn pizza ; mushroom steak ; french toast ; vegetable chilli ; egg white omelette ; mushroom soup ; bbq ribs plate ; blackened bass ; gumbo ; steak

Dessert neapolitan ice cream ; rainbow sorbet ; vanilla ice cream ; alien fruit tart ; cream filled donut ; cream snack cake ; honey cake ; plain waffles ; rainbow brownies ; hamburger cake ; chocolate chip cookie ; apple pie ; banana cream pie ; pumpkin pie ; simcity cheesecake ; fruit cobbler

[sciderman]

Round boy + mask = square jaw

Pointy boy + mask = egg

Why?

wade's mask is masc. (hahaehehehahaeo...)

wade does a lot to mask his soft interior – he worries a lot about appearing soft.

[x]

he's GETTING SOFT (and peter loves it. he loves when wade gets soft.)

[x]

underneath it all, wade's soft and round. no matter how he tries to hide it.

[x]

wade is always hiding it – to way more extreme and destructive measures than peter, actually.

it's kind of funny, wade's insistence that peter needs to be honest to himself - because wade's the poster boy. wade finds it difficult to be true to himself, because he doesn't even know which "self" is true at this point. he's constantly pretending to be someone or something else.

something that'll please others. make him more palatable. more entertaining. make the audience side with him, even if he thinks he's undeserving. fake it till you make it.

sometimes i think about how wade lost his virginity the night before he enlisted (because he was worried the guys would make fun of him if he was a virgin.)

of course they made fun of him anyway.

he doubles down - he puts on the macho air that everyone expects from him. he can be the bad boy. he can be the rugged antihero that is a total jerk but everyone loves anyway because he's the tough guy. it's why you'll never get to see what adult wade looked like pre-weapon X - you'll see wade in his teenage years - but once he enlists - that's not wade wilson. he's constantly playing a role. cool action hero, whatever'll get him the girl.

it isn't until weapon X that he's forced into a position where he can't hide anymore. everything is on his skin. plain as day, for everyone to see.

[x]

deadpool becomes the mask wade can hide all his damage and his insecurities behind because lord knows he can't hide a thing when he's out of it. like a lobster out of his shell. he's soft, and pink and tender. he couldn't survive without that hard red shell exterior, to make him look tough.

peter's mask is also masc, but his mask is peter parker.

spider-man is kind of funny. in that – outwardly, it does look similar to deadpool's performative masculinity. he has "-man" in his name, for christ's sake - but - it's not, really. you wouldn't say spider-man is overly macho. even as much as peter insists it is - nobody buys it.

you'd definitely, by all accounts, call peter parker the more masc aligned of the two - peter wears baggy clothes, he's kind of uptight, a little bit boring - and spider-man - spider-man's downright flamboyant - from his mannerisms, his jokes, and his tights. oh, and his fluttery little web-wings. he is fruity.

spider-man, in his tiny fruity little tights: YEAH. take a look at ME, girls. this is what true manhood looks like.

you might say the confidence it grants him is what makes him macho - but i think the fun thing about peter's gender journey is his embracal that actually - confidence isn't necessarily a masculine trait, and that - actually, his gender icons (save for uncle ben) are largely confident women.

i think that's why olive is so dear to me - that peter's leaning into a confidence and self-assuredness that doesn't come from being conventionally masculine. and, in fact - peter parker might be so shy and insecure because he's trying to fit in a box that doesn't fit him.

i think spider-man is more of a playground for peter. a place where he can experiment with his gender and his sexuality and the concept of "manhood" and what it means to him.

he can explore, because the anonymity grants him less social pressure to fit in. society can despise spider-man, and yeah - it'll get him down, but the repercussions are relatively little. peter has to fit in, to survive. and, as peter parker, he's terrified of those repercussions.

peter has such a desire to explore his identity and understand himself better - but, under safe, controlled conditions - whether that's under the anonymity of his mask or... or with people, who make him feel safe.

so, spider-man is peter's outlet to be fruity without repercussions. peter's og dragsona, actually. so – lithe, and curvy. he is so shape.

[changingplumbob]

Waiter: Hello folks. What can I get you

Coraline: Apple

Layla: If my birthday girl could have a bowl of applesauce please, I’ll have lobster

Malcolm: And I’ll have salmon please. Our son will have the gnocchi

Layla: Actually forget that. If we could just have a chicken breast, as plain as you can make it, with some vegetables. I think it’s on the kids menu as a number 5, or it was online

Byron: Plain vegetables please

Mal looked like he was going to interrupt but I just looked at him. He kept his mouth shut until the waiter had gone.

[ppnuggiex]

　　　　　　DORMLEADERS x gn reader

　　　　『　riddle ,, leona ,, azul ,, kalim ,, vil ,, idia ,, malleus ,, gender neutral reader    』

　　-> painting their nails to match their dorms ,, matching nails

　　— fluff ,, sfw

　　— just an idea that came to me :D feel free to request !! theyre open !! there are some slight movie references 🫵

- riddle

| • he was a bit reluctant at first to you painting his nails but agreed in the end

| • white black and red is the color scheme

| • on one hand ,, you have the card signs ;; diamond ,, spade ,, heart ,, club ,, and on the pinky is a 'j' for joker

| • on the other hand you have the different things from a familiar movie ,, a white rabbit ,, a crown ,, a cat ,, a little playing card ,, and a white heart on the pinky

| • riddle is quite amazed with your skills ,, enjoying the little ornaments and decorations painted on his nails

| • lord have mercy if someone saw yalls matching nails

| • cater would beam at them ,, and trey would find them cute

| • ace and deuce ,, however ,, have different reactions ,, but they dont really want to be collared so they happen to keep their mouths shut around riddle

| • but around you ,, theyre blabbing about it left and right ,, mainly ace but sometimes deuce chips in a bit

| • in the end ,, riddle enjoys matching with you in a sort of way

- azul

| • another thats reluctant to agree ,, after all he does have an image to uphold and who knows how the tweels will react if they notice

| • but he also gives in ,, noting the happy look on your face when he does

| • your color scheme is a lavender ,, dark grey and an off white color

| • on one hand ,, you paint little marine creatures ;; an octopus ,, an eel ,, a lobster ,, a random blue and yellow striped fish ,, and a tentacle on the pinky nail

| • the other hand consists of little items that happen to be associated with octavinelle ;; azul's contracts ,, jade's mushrooms ,, floyd's basketball (azul wasnt too happy abt it but he didnt say much)

| • though on the last two nails you added the mostro lounge logo and on the pinky you painted it lavender and added grey stripes

| • azul's quite glad he happens to have gloves because the last thing he needs is the tweels noticing the little things on his nails

| • but they notice anyways ,, and maybe you let it slip that you and azul are matching

| • lord have mercy for this man

- leona

| • he dont care ,, just huffs and tells you to do whatever if it makes you happy

| • he pretends to stay asleep during it ,, but he does like the feeling of your hands holding onto his ,, and maybe the thought of matching with you

| • he wont care for who sees it ,, if it makes you happy he'll happily comply with you

| • the scheme is a beige color ,, bright yellow orange ,, and a dark grey

| • on one hand you paint ;; a lion ,, a bone ,, a hyena (leona fusses abt it) ,, a wolf (he also fussed abt that) ,, and a star on the pinky

| • the other hand you kept simple and plain ,, adding a star on every other nail and stripes on the others

| • if anyone mentions your matching nails in a bad manner ,, he'll get on their case immediately ,, telling them to mind their own business

| • he'll gladly match nails with you again in the future though ,, he'll still fuss abt it but he enjoys it

- kalim

| • he happily agrees ! he wants to match nails ! hes so excited for it he can barely sit still as is

| • jamil at first offers to do it for you both but you deny him

| • your color scheme is red ,, black ,, and a gold color

| • on one hand you paint :: a desert ,, a snake ,, an elephant ,, kalim's flying carpet ,, and a black heart on the pinky

| • on the other hand you paint every other nail red and the rest black with gold stripes

| • he adores them ! hes so happy to match with you ,, adoring all the different drawings on them ,, in love with the color scheme

| • if anyone asks about them he'll gladly talk their ears off about how you did them and how they look so cool

- idia

| • you happened to ask him during a game ,, and he got surprised ,, stuttering at first before slowly agreeing to it

| • the color scheme is blue ,, and off white ,, and black

| • on one hand you paint :: cerebus ,, blue fire ,, pain and panic from a certain movie (hercules) ,, and a black heart on the pinky

| • on the other hand you paint every other nail blue and black ,, and add white flames with blue accents to the ones that are black ,, and white stripes to the black nails

| • he likes the nails ,, especially seeing cerebus on them ,, and the idea of matching

| • if ortho finds out his hair will be tinted pink as he tries to distract his brother from the fact that yall are matching nails

| • he loves it though ,, sometimes running his thumb over them and looking over the little designs

- vil

| • refuses ,, flat out refuses ,, he's not too confident in youe nail painting abilities and he doesnt bother to figure out whether theyre good or not

| • but after a bit of begging he'll sigh and give in ,, telling you not to mess up

| • your color scheme is white ,, a prussian blue ,, purple ,, bright red and black to match vils dorm outfit and the dorm itself

| • on one hand you paint :: a rose ,, a poison covered apple ,, an  arrow ,, a potion and a red heart on the pinky

| • so far vil is a bit intrigued at your abilities and lets you continue ,, giving another warning not to mess up

| • on the other hand you paint ever other hand red and the other blue ,, putting black stripes over the blue nails and on the red nails you paint white poison drips with a bit of purple tint

| • he likes them ,, theyre alright ,, not the best hes had but hes touched by the fact you both are matching

| • he offers to teach you how to paint nails better though ,, saying you could use it but nonetheless he's impressed at your abilities

| • when hes alone he gets all giddy about it but shhh ,, dont tell

- malleus

| • hes over the moon ,, you want to match nails with him ?? you want to paint his nails ?? oh ,, love for you ! love for you for a thousand years !! hes so happy ,, even his little fangs are showing when smiles widely at you

| • your color scheme is green ,, black ,, and an off white

| • on one hand you paint :: a dragon's head ,, a thorned flower ,, a bat (to resemble lilia) ,, a lightning bolt (for sebek) ,, and a sword (for silver)

| • on the other hand you paint every other nail green and the rest black ,, putting black stripes over the green nails and white stripes on the black nails ,, though on the pinky you put a black heart

| • hes so touched ,, seeing the little symbols ,, adoring the dragon head you put so much detail into

| • he wont show anyone unless they point them out

| • and of course ,, sebek does ,, astonished that his master has his nails painted

| • lilia is quick to join in with it ,, before he catches the little bat on one nail and decides to leave it be ,, smiling to himself

[buffetlicious]

The slow braised Black Angus Prime Beef Rib was tender and soft with the right amount of fat in there and the gravy was rich and flavourful. Here are the bits and pieces I picked up walking among the different food stations. I love the Truffle Mashed Potatoes with the subtle perfume of the earthy fungus.

See, I told you I went for more of the Salted Egg Prawn and also picked up a piece of the barramundi which while meaty wasn’t a hit with my palate as I found it on the plain side. Dining partner came back with this Pan-Fried Lobsters from the Indian Station. Unfortunately, it was overcooked and the flesh was dry.

The wait staff were busy serving drinks with a skewered lychee perched on top. They came over to our table as asked if daddy (that would be moi) would like one. I nodded, not sure how to response as my “son” opposite me is a colleague. :D A non-alcoholic Fruit Juice Cocktail was placed in front of me. I think it was just a concoction of lime juice and canned lychee syrup in there but refreshing, nonetheless.

Later in the evening, the staffs were handing out Goodies Bag to male diners or at least men who look like fathers. I got my office’s “son” with me so they gave one to me. The perks of being a “father” minus the responsibility! :D The bag contains a 20% off return voucher for a certain buffet theme as well as an Inductive Charger for handphone.

[shark-of-tha-day]

shark of the day: brown shyshark, haploblepharus fuscus

------------------------------------------------------------

brown shysharks, also called plain happies, are smaller sharks despite being the largest of the shyshark family. they can grow to be around 73 cm(~2.4 ft) long. brown shysharks are found around shallow inshore rocky reefs of eastern south africa. they feed primarily on bony fish and lobsters. like others in the shyshark family, brown shysharks will curl into a ring with their tails covering their eyes when threatened.

[penny00dreadful]

Part 1 Part 3

The F-slur is mentioned here but only mentioned, not used to attack or demean.

“I don’t have a wife. I have… I have a husband.” 

Future-Eddie slapped him on the shoulder. “Hell yeah you do.”

“They legalise it? They-” Robin looked over at her future self, her eyes glossy. “W- they can get married?”

“Yeah.” Future-Robin squeezed Steve and Robin closer. “Yeah. They can get married. Just in a couple of places to start but then country-wide.”

Nancy nodded along as though this was all tactical information useful for defeating Vecna. “Is anyone else going to come through?”

Future-Eddie shrugged. “Not sure. I think Robin and I were zapped here because our past and future selves were in the same geographical location when there was a pulse. So, sorry to say, Nance, but you’re definitely not about to pop in.”

“Why? Where am I?”

“Still on a plane back from Alaska last I heard.”

“What on earth was I doing in Alaska?”

“Spy shit.” The two time travellers said in unison.

Nancy uncharacteristically stumbled in surprise. “Spy shit? Seriously?”

“Well, personally I believe you’re an international 007, Agent Wheeler, but most of the rest think it’s just plain old boring investigative journalism.” His future counterpart clearly hadn’t lost any theatricality with time. 

In fact it seemed to have gotten worse as he waved his arms around. “You’re like, the top dog at it, dude. Literally so good at it that barely anyone knows your name which you definitely use to your advantage. You’re super cagey on details. 

“But this time around, you were in Korea when shit hit the fan. Again, don’t know what you were doing there but I did hear Pyongyang mentioned once so you were only a jump away from Kamchatka when Ellie felt a disturbance in the force so you volunteered to go see if it was the Ruskies again, but no dice. Completely filled in with concrete. We have no idea how you got there so quickly but my money is on spy shit.”

Nancy stared at him open-mouthed as he spoke.

“So… So I do it? I make it? I succeed?”

“More than succeed.”

“And,” Nancy bit her lip, like she didn’t really want to ask the question but she was burning to know nonetheless. “The whole… marriage and kids thing?”

Future-Eddie glanced toward Steve, occupied by Future-Robin who was trying to distract him from the conversation and Eddie’s heart sank.

“Nance, don’t take this the wrong way but I don’t think you ever wanted that. I think you were told to want that, as a woman, but it was never you. You don’t have any kids, you’re not married and I don’t think you ever want to be.”

Nancy looked almost relieved at the information and Eddie was so confused. 

He still had a thousand questions firing around his head so he decided to latch onto something mentioned earlier. 

“Who’s Cassie?”

Future-Eddie smiled softly. “She’s my youngest.”

Eddie choked on thin air. “Kid?!”

“Yeah.”

“Your youngest kid is my age?”

“God, dude. Don’t remind me. You’ll make me feel so old.”

“You are old.”

His future self shoved his arm. “Watch it, whippersnapper.”

“Who’re your other kids?”

“Here, let me show you.” He pulled a slab of something out of his pocket before shaking his head and pulling his wallet out instead. “I think a phone would be a bit too much, so we’ll do the wallet.”

Eddie blinked. “Right.” Like he knew whatever the fuck the guy was on about.

Future-Eddie pulled some photos loose and in the pile Eddie caught sight of a hairy muscular thigh and a torso littered in old scars stretched obscenely out on a bed and dressed in black lace before the photo was swiftly snatched out of sight and Future-Eddie stuffed it down his pants.

“Woah, whoops! You don’t need to be seeing that!”

“Eddie!” Future-Robin called, staring at him wide eyed. “Oh my god, you keep that photo in your wallet?!”

“It was an anniversary gift!”

“He’s going to rip you a new asshole once he finds out.”

“God.” Future-Eddie breathed. “I hope so.”

Eddie knew his face must be lobster red. From what he had just seen of his future husband, he was hot, metal as shit with those scars and willing to do things like… that?! He’d hit the damn jackpot. 

If only he’d seen his face.

“Moving on!” Future-Eddie called brightly. “My girls.” He held out a photo of three teenagers backstage at some kind of concert. It looked like they were laughing at something that had just happened behind the camera, their backs to the stage. They all looked wildly different from each other. 

“They’re older now, obviously, but this photo… It’s my favourite. Rhea, Poppy and Cassie." He pointed at each of them respectively 

The girl on the left looked to be the oldest, blonde and short with glasses, dressed in oversized flannels and baggy ripped jeans. Her mouth was wide open in what must have been a cackle, nearly bent double with one hand on her sister's shoulder, keeping her balance.

The girl in the middle was taller, her hair was dyed a dark purple colour with two piercings over her black painted lips, dressed in flowing black lace. She had both hands up as if she’d just been hiding behind them, her eyes wide and incredulous, seeming to only really let out a giggle.

The third was a similar height to the girl in the middle, black haired and freckled, dressed in bright pastel colours with a cast on her arm. She was half hiding her face behind her hair, turned towards her sisters but her smile was so wide her eyes all but disappeared.

They all looked so happy together. 

Holy shit. 

He only ever had Wayne and now… well, in the future he has a husband and three daughters (holyshitholyshitholyshit), he’d built a family.

“Pretty unbelievable, right?” Future-Eddie smiled across at him, warm and content.

“Just wait ‘till you find out what he does for work!” Future-Robin shouted at him from up ahead.

Work? Eddie had never had a job before and everything in his future seemed so perfect, maybe this was the downer. God he hoped it wasn’t some corporate bullshit.

“What do you do for work?”

Future-Eddie blushed which was very fucking odd and scratched at the back of his neck. “I’m retired.” He shrugged.

“Eddie. You’re not going to tell him?”

“How can I tell him? Look at him! He’s having the worst week of his life! He’s being hunted by a town full of evangelical nutjobs, you think he’ll believe me if I tell him I have two Grammys and a Tony?!”

“Okay, pause.” Eddie put his hand to his future self’s chest, stopping them both. “I’m gonna need you to run that by me again.”

Because no fuckin’ way, man.

Nuh-uh.

Not a chance it meant what he thought it meant.

Not him. 

Not some little rat goblin from rural Indiana.

“Two Grammys.”

Future-Eddie nodded. “Two Grammys and a Tony.”

Eddie wrinkled his nose before scoffing. “Why a Tony?”

“It’s called branching out, dude. Don’t gatekeep, it’s not a good look.”

Future-Robin grimaced from up ahead. “Sorry, he’s sensitive.”

“Yes, I’m sensitive, Rob! Lloyd Webber can suck my dick!” He grumbled and muttered in a way that was clearly supposed to be an imitation, “Not built for writing a broadway musical my asshole.”

“So…”

“So.”

“You’re… we’re like, famous?”

Future-Eddie shrugged. “Yeah. Kinda.”

“With two Grammys.”

“We would have more if we didn’t get banned.” He muttered again, clearly not supposed to be overheard.

Eddie just stared. “Dude! How the hell do you get banned from the Grammys?”

Future-Robin faltered in her steps ahead, stuttering in the middle of her answer to Robin about her work as a translator in Geneva.

His future self started to walk again, trying to brush him off. “Uh… You know what? It’s a long story, I don’t think we should-” 

Eddie caught up. “No, no. This is my potential future right? I should know, maybe I can avoid it?”

Future-Eddie raised his hand to his jaw again, almost unconsciously, like those words hit him on multiple levels.

“Some things can’t be avoided, I don’t think.” He sighed heavily. “Alright. I got outed. Publicly. It wasn’t pretty. And it wasn’t just me, my husband got outed too. We called a blackmailer's bluff and they followed through.”

Eddie shook his head, disbelieving. “They banned you because you got outed?”

“No… not exactly. Okay, listen. I was in a really dark place at the time and I was so, so angry and you know what we’re like when we’re angry. It was incredibly controversial at the time and still is, kinda. Like a black stain on the band's past but I wouldn’t take it back if I could, you understand me?

“When I wrote it I was feeling super toxic and bitter and I’m not excusing it because it was so personal but the younger generation have picked it up again and they’re seeing it like it was meant to be seen. Like it’s about having to hide and live in fear all the time and how stressful and unfair it is and-”

Eddie sped up his steps just a little so he could look at his future self. “What did you do?” 

“I…” Future-Eddie twisted at his wedding band. “I released a song called ‘Faggot’ and it’s exactly as painful as you think.”

Eddie sucked in a breath through his teeth. “Oh.”

“Yeah. Listen, I don’t really know how this whole divergent paths thing will work, how much of my life you will or won’t experience after this. But everything I went through, everything, made me who I am today. It’s going to be really hard and it really fucking sucks sometimes. But it got me my girls. It got me my husband. I wouldn’t give it up for anything, you understand me?”

He looked back down at the ground, contemplating. Even though he’d just heard of some truly awful shit that might happen to him at some point, he couldn’t help agreeing with his future self. He had the girls. They seemed happy. He had a husband and he seemed truly content with him, even if Steve’s shadow was still overhanging. But he didn’t really know that for sure. He wanted to know about who he was married to, even if he didn’t want to know who.

“Tell me about him?”

Future-Eddie’s face split into a wide grin. “I thought you’d never ask. He’s the biggest fucking dork I know. The sweetest guy in the world, kindergarten teacher, little league coach… he sees everything. Self sacrificial streak a mile wide, giving me grey hairs.” He laughed.

“Sounds like a normie.”

“The normiest. It’s adorable.”

“Eddie!” Future-Robin called, waving him over from up ahead. “I need you, c’mere.”

“That’s sweet, baby. But it would never work between us.”

She rolled her eyes. “Jesus Christ, do you have an off switch?”

Future-Eddie’s grin turned feral. “I-”

“No!” She held up her hand. “Stop. Just come here, fucking hell.”

Eddie watched his own future counterpart practically skip over to the others, throwing his arms around both Robins and Nancy while his mind spun like a record without the needle down.

Fuckin’ time travel, man. What were the odds? But what were the odds of an alternate dimension and demon bats and demon dogs and just general demon fuckery?

And he was fucking married? What the shit. Like he’d pretty much resigned himself to short term secret shameful relationships or quick encounters in whatever club bathroom he ended up at in the city.

Some kind of life of settling down, with kids no less, was not something he’d ever dare believe…

“So.”

Eddie looked over. Steve was walking beside him, staying remarkably steady despite his wounds.

“So.”

He smiled at him but it was a little strained at the edges. “You have a husband.”

“I have a husband.”

And it was only really then that it hit him. Those words. Those words felt so… fantastic to say.

It wasn’t just the fact that he’d come out.

It was the fact that the words ‘I have a husband.’ meant that he had a husband. Someone who loved him unconditionally. Someone who stuck with his eccentricities and his trash panda tendencies. His parents were a terrible example for marriage and he knew, he knew that he would never allow himself to end up that way.

So this had to be it.

This had to be real.

“I don’t think I’d mind a husband.”

Eddie stopped dead.

Steve turned to look at him, a small smirk on his face. He strode two steps in front, continuing to walk backwards, keeping pace before placing a finger under Eddie’s chin and pushing his jaw back up. He hadn’t even realised it was hanging open.

“But… but you’re…”

"Yeah, I'm attracted to girls, I can hide if I want to and have an easy life. But boys are an option for me too. Don’t tell me you think I should play it safe because society tells me to. I thought you’d be better than that.” Steve slowed to keep pace with him again, knocking him with his shoulder and the barest hint of that smug smile on his face.

“Wh- I- I am. I am better than that. I’m sorry I just didn’t expect- you don’t-”

“I don’t look queer? Or act queer?”

“No! No, I didn’t mean…”

But he did mean that. He had thought that. And his shit had now been completely rocked because of it. 

His jaw had fallen open again, he just realised. He snapped it closed and his mouth felt so fucking dry. “I think you’d make a good husband.”

“Are you asking?” Steve quirked an eyebrow at him and flashed his teeth with a grin.

Jesus H. Christ he was so pretty.

Fucking hell. Was this what it was like to be on the end of the Harrington charm? God, he was in so much trouble now. 

And Steve was still grinning at him, like a cocky little bastard. “I don’t think anyone would want me as a husband anyway.”

“I’m sorry, I’m lost. Who the fuck would ever pass you up for a husband?”

Steve shrugged, a little more subdued than he was before. Eddie only barely caught the glance in Nancy’s direction.

“Wheeler’s loss.”

“No, I mean I get it. I have a lot of baggage and I feel like these bites aren’t going to just smoothe over. What happens then? What’s my spouse gonna do with me once I don’t have my looks anymore, you know?”

“Fuck your looks man, that’s not why people get married. That’s not why I’d get married.”

“It’s why my parents got married.”

“And you wanna have a marriage like theirs?”

“No! God, no. Never.”

“Exactly. So why do you think you’d allow yourself to get tied down to someone who only cares what you look like?”

“Maybe that’s the only reason they’d have me.” Steve grinned as if what he was saying was just fact. “Like I said, I’ve got baggage.”

Eddie shook his head. “We’ve all got baggage, man. I’m not trying to like, invalidate yours or whatever, but everyone has their shit. Yeah your shit is fucking intense, I mean look around, but that won’t matter to the right person. They might have their own. Might not be alternate dimension time travel shit but could be something similar. Maybe you’ll marry a veteran or a refugee. Or maybe you’ll marry someone who’s never experienced anything worse than a paper cut and when they stub their toe they only say ‘oh dear’. Relationships… marriage is a partnership, their baggage, your baggage, it’s there to be shared. It wouldn’t matter to me. I’ll take on my husbands shit and I’ll marry a man who’ll take on mine too. I know I will. I’m sure of it.” 

Steve was staring at him like he had six heads. 

Fantastic.

After he’d just spilled himself out of his mouth and everything.

But he wasn’t gonna back down. 

It’s what he believed in his heart of hearts.

“I just-” Steve started. “I’ve never heard anyone describe it like that.”

“Like what?” To him, it just seemed like common sense. 

“Like a partnership. You know like people always say relationships are commitment and dedication and selflessness.”

“Well yeah, they are but it has to go both ways. You can’t have one side putting in all that effort.”

“Partnership.” Steve muttered quietly, considering. “It has to be equal, right?”

“Yeah, now you’re getting it. It has to be equal.”

Steve’s smile was softer now, to go right along with his eyes. “You’re gonna make someone a really good husband one day, Eddie.”

Fuck, wasn’t that just a cupids arrow straight to the heart. And now Steve was looking at him all tender and it was driving him insane.

“You gotta at least cook me a nice dinner first before asking for my hand, there, Stevie.”

Steve shrugged. “Okay. What do you like?”

“Wha- I… What do I like?”

“What do you like to eat?”

Wait.

Wait.

His mind was blank. He should really be able to improv his way out of this but his head was completely empty.

“Italian, I guess?”

Steve’s grin almost turned conspiratorial. He reached up and lightly tugged at one of Eddie’s curls. “Fuck, you’re perfect, aren’t you?”

“I’m on the run from the law at the moment, sweetheart.”

“Not for much longer if I have anything to say about it.”

They were interrupted by raised voices ahead of them. There was a brief moment of panic before he and Steve realised it was just the two time travellers bickering loudly as the trees started to thin and houses began to come into view.

“Well, why can’t we remember any of this then?” Future-Robin asked.

“Because it hasn’t happened to us in our past. It’s happening to us in our present. And their present. How can we remember something that hasn’t happened yet? Because it’s happening now. To four different people. Their timeline has already diverged from ours just by us turning up. This isn't our story anymore, it's theirs.”

She looked at him in disbelief. “What the fuck are you talking about?”

Future-Eddie waved his hand at her. “Wibbly-wobbly, timey-wimey.”

Future-Robin reached out and swatted him over the head. “You’re such a dork!”

“Hey!” He shoved her. “I only got into sci-fi because of you. Before you I was blissfully existing in a fantasy only realm.”

“Yeah.” She shoved him back. “You’re fucking welcome.”

They kept pushing and prodding at each other before it descended into chaos, devolving into some kind of childish slap war until eventually she had him in a headlock.

“Aaagh, Stevie! Help me!”

Steve just blinked at the two of them, probably trying to figure out how he was supposed to corral two adults who were nearly triple his age.

“So in the future, you and Robin seem to have some kind of… friendship?”

“Friendship?” Future-Eddie squawked. “No friendship here. She’s my soulmate by proxy. My sworn fuckin’ enemy.” From his bent over position he managed to grab her behind the knees and haul her over his shoulder.

“Barbarian!” 

“Buckley, my tabletop wife, you know I’m a bard.”

“Would you two shut the fuck up?!” Nancy hissed. “You’re gonna get us eaten.”

Future-Robin was let back onto her feet, quietly.

“Sorry.”

“Sorry.”

It was objectively hilarious, watching two grown adults who could technically be their grandparents mutter their apologies as if they’d just been chastised by the school principal. 

It was even funnier watching them punch each other in the arm as soon as Nancy’s back was turned. 

“We’re here.” Nancy said, staring out at the houses. “C’mon.” Without a backwards glance, she took off running.

“Nan-!” Robin lowered her volume as they all chased after her. “Nancy!”

By the time Eddie and Steve had followed them through the front door, the rest of them were disappearing upstairs. 

“Why didn’t you tell us this earlier?” Nancy was asking, holding what looked like a diary.

“Would you have believed us? You need to see evidence for yourself, you know that.” His future counterpart answered.

“What did I miss?” Eddie wheezed, placing his hands on his knees. 

Fuck, he needed to give up smoking.

“It’s 1983.” Robin answered, patting his back.

“Is this more time-travel fuckery?”

“No.”

“Yes.”

Future Eddie and Robin spoke at the same time.

“The Upside-Down is stuck in 1983. The day Will Byers went missing.” Nancy clarified.

“Right. Okay. 1983. Cool.” Eddie gave a thumbs up, leaning heavily against the doorframe. He glanced around. “Hey, where’s-”

He was abruptly cut off as the entire house around them shook, sending him tumbling back into the hallway. The sounds of photo frames and Nancy’s knick knacks crashing to the ground surrounded him but underneath it all his blood ran cold when he heard a pained shout from downstairs.

“Steve?!” He called out, panicked, trying to get to his feet but being defeated by his own severe lack of athleticism and the incessant shaking of the very earth beneath him.

He crawled towards the stairs, thankful that the shaking had stopped by the time he reached the first step. 

He flew down them, nearly landing square on his ass again before catching sight of Steve, leaning heavily up against the wall and clutching his sides.

“Steve! Are you okay?” There were red patches starting to bloom under the makeshift bandages around his waist and he hissed in pain, as Eddie took hold of his arms, pressing his forehead into Eddie’s shoulder.

“I just… I just need a minute.” 

There was the sound of something ripping beside him.

“Shit. Things move fast in this timeline, don’t they?”

Eddie turned his head and froze, staring wide eyed at the third figure standing next to them.

Part 1 Part 3

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I'm thinking one more part for this auspicious anniversary/time travel fic. I'll update the posts with links and the AO3 link too.

Thanks everyone for your sweet comments and tag requests! Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside. 🖤

Tags: @epiclazersharkshark, @estrellami-1, @swimmingbirdrunningrock, @addelyin

[kitthepurplepotato]

Chapter 17 - Drama in the air ✈️

Winter wonderland #1

Summary: The gang makes their way to the Winter Cabins. Somehow, everyone is grumpy today. Also, why does Rody and Katsuki hate each other?!

Warnings: Swear words, a tiny bit suggestive, a lot of tension for some weird reason.

Second warning: the “Winter Wonderland” storyline will contain other background relationships (Kirishima x Bakugou, Tamaki x Mirio, Kaminari x Shinsou, Todoroki x Yaomomo) and NSFW stuff (NOT with them. Khm), but I’ll leave a warning before it happens! This chapter is safe!)

First Chapter Master List

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

“Welcome aboard, my friends!” Rody’s voice comes through the speakers. “I’ll do my best to not drop you all into the ocean!”

“I want to go home.” Tamaki whimpers with his face hidden in his best friend’s neck, who’s wearing a plain T-shirt with “emotional support animal” written on the front. You can’t help but giggle. That guy looks like he knows how to have fun.

“Are you getting off on being an asshole?” Katsuki yells towards the front, annoyed. Izuku sighs next to you.

“Guys, can you just get along? I still don’t understand why are you so mean to him, Kacchan. You frowned at him back then, too.”

“Hey, the guy literally just made the octopus-chicken EMO guy cry and I’m the asshole?” Katsuki retorts. “Look at him! He’s about to hyperventilate!”

“… and calling him an octopus-chicken is better? “ Shouto adds.

“That’s a fair point, Blasty.” Kaminari chimes in, too.

“What a loud bunch! I like that! And to answer your question, I do not get off on being an asshole. I leave that little kink to you, brother.”

“Oh you are so fucking dead.” Katsuki stands up, palm making tiny explosions. Eijirou tries his best to sit him back down and you swear Tamaki’s soul just left his body for a second.

“I miss home. Can we go back? I can float us.” Izuku whispers into your ear.

“I don’t think we can open the door without crushing everyone thanks to the pressure up here.” You whisper back.

“Bummer.” He sighs again, clearly overwhelmed by all the loudness after being home for so long.

“Think about the cabin, though. We will have a fireplace, a nice cozy bed… we can keep each other warm during the night…” your palm on Izuku’s thigh slowly creeps further, caressing his inner thigh and Izuku almost chokes on his saliva, his face as red as a lobster’s.

“Oh my god, respectfully, can you not eye-fuck each other while I’m risking my life to keep this plane afloat?!” Kirishima moans with a blush on his face.

“Bro, they’ve been together in the same house for weeks yet they still can’t keep their hands off each other. I want that.” Kaminari adds longingly.

“Find yourself a horny little girlfriend then.” Shinsou pouts, staring out of the window. For everyone’s surprise, Kaminari doesn’t say anything back just sighs with a lovelorn expression.

“Okay, let’s leave all the baggage in the baggage compartment, this is a fun trip!” Rody’s head pops our from the front and everyone screams in unison.

“KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE ROAD!”

“There is no road. Just clouds… ahh, nevermind. “

~•🥦•~

“Time to change into something warm, guys! We are approaching our main destination!” Rody’s voice comes through the speakers once again.

You look out of the window right away and you can’t believe what you are seeing; there is a small island right under the plane, covered in white and there is fresh snow falling from the sky, but only around the island, which makes it look like it’s a giant snow globe. It’s absolutely magical.

“Wow.” Katsuki stares out of the window with childish glee. Izuku looks at him with nothing but fondness, probably remembering their childhood when Katsuki’s gaze was constantly this pure. “Look at those mountains, Ei.” Katsuki mutters dreamily, completely fascinated as the island comes closer and closer, revealing more and more about itself as the plane approaches the land.

“You wanna climb that massive one, don’t you?” Eijirou snickers with his head resting on Katsuki’s shoulder. They are so fucking adorable, goddamit!

“Duh.” Katsuki snickers back proudly.

“Fuck, I forgot that it’s gonna be winter!” Kaminari freaks out. The guy is wearing a single leather jacket. You can’t help but sigh.

“Well, luckily for you, your boring ass roommate didn’t.” Shinsou murmurs under his nose, rummaging in his massive backpack as he speaks. After a few seconds, he takes out a winter coat and drops it on Kaminari’s head.

“Oh my god, I love you.” Kaminari goes for a hug with the coat still on his head. Tamaki giggles.

“Oh my god, Katsuki, he laughed! He’s not terrified of us!” Eijirou mutters, swiping a stray tear off his face.

“I mean, Denki is so dumb it’s literally impossible to be scared of him. I mean look at his face. Oh wait, you can’t see it. But you know what I mean.”

You really feel like you shouldn’t be listening in right now. Katsuki is so serene it feels like this version of him is reserved for Eijirou and Eijirou only.

“Sweets, look! You can see the cabins from here. On the top of that mountain!” Izuku steals your attention away by nuzzling into your neck, his finger pointing at the window. “Look, they have an onsen as well! By the look of it, every cabin comes with one…” He smiles knowingly. You can’t help but blush.

“Izu, behave yourself.”

“Hey, I’m on a holiday! I’m happy. Let me have this.” His sad smile shots an arrow through your heart. Fuck, you are such an idiot.

“Sorry. It’s just… I’m more excited about the massive fireplace. I hope there is fluffy rug in front of it. Like in the movies, you know.” Your blush can not be more obvious at this point, but you don’t care; by the look of it, everyone is too busy staring out the window to listen to your conversation anyway.

“If not, we can put some blankets down. Or I can just bring the mattress out. With black whip, of course.”

You can’t get over Izuku’s lovesick face and you never will. You still can’t believe you are the one who makes him look like that. He’s so handsome, but also so adorable, so sexy but so sweet, just the perfect combination of them all.

“I love you so much.” You mumble out loudly and Izuku shines brighter than thousand suns.

“I love you more.”

“Don’t start!” You giggle as the plane starts its landing.

“We are about to land! Buckle up, buddies! Don’t forget to clap later on!” Rody announces excitedly.

“What kind of idiot asks for people to clap? Now you ruined it!” Katsuki yells back and the bickering starts again.

“It was so peaceful…” Eijirou sighs, clearly given up.

“Well, if everything would be perfect it wouldn’t really feel real. But this does.” You smile at Eijirou who smiles back knowingly.

“I weirdly know what you mean.”

~•🥦•~

“Wow.” Tamaki is the first one to make a comment about the mesmerizing sight in front of you; you landed on a big chunk of concrete in the middle of a small hill; yes, you heard it right, that’s what these people call an airport apparently; and you can see most of the island from this point. There are cute shopping streets and pretty, modern buildings on your right side then you see some residential houses on the left side, quite far away from the main area of the city (the island is one city, or at least that’s what you’ve been told) then you have a bunch of mountains with small cabins scattered around one of them, then there is a massive mountain, so high you beg whoever is up there that the boys won’t want to climb to the top of it, because you definitely fucking can’t. By the look of it, there is heavy snow in the mountain area and a light one around the city center. Needless to say it’s really cold but the view warms your heart enough to not feel the chill that much.

“Welcome!” Rody climbs out of the plane, cracking his bones dramatically, his actions followed by an even more dramatic sigh. “The owners of the Island are waiting for us in that park there, so I’ll leave the explanations to them. It’s a good starting point as you have the shopping center and the massive grocery store close by, so we’ll be able to get some grub before making our way to the cabins.” And indeed, there is a cute park right between the shopping and the residential area. It’s quite far away but you knew what you are getting into when you said yes to another “camping trip”, so you just take a deep breath and pray to be strong enough to be able to get down there then up the MOUNTAIN (!), because by the look of it, there are no cabins anywhere else so that means you’ll need to do another hike to be able to get to your accommodation.

“Why do I feel like there is no bus to the cabins?” Kaminari mutters tiredly.

“Your lazy ass should’ve said yes to this trip if you can handle it, Pikachu.” Katsuki rolls his eyes annoyedly. “Bus? To the mountains? I would ruin the fun part.”

“Sorry, someone actually wanted to rest on their holiday.”

“When was the last time you got laid, Kaminari?” Katsuki retorts, clearly trying his best to shut his trap but this is Bakugou Katsuki. He just… can’t.

“When was the last time you got laid, Bakugou? You seem quite grumpy as well.” Rody tries to “help”, but needless to say that comment angers Katsuki to no end.

“You really don’t want an answer for that, Rody.” Eijirou laughs, scratching the back of his head, embarrassed.

“This morning, fucker.” Katsuki answers anyway and everyone who doesn’t know about Katsuki’s fiancé gawks in the background.

“Wow.” Rody is clearly rendered speechless. To be fair, you are not surprised.

“Fuckface.” Katsuki mutters under his nose and makes his way down the hill, taking Eijirou with him.

“Sorry man, I was just joking! I’ll be nice! Please tell me more about this girl…” Rody tries to get out of the awkward conversation, but he only makes it more awkward.

“Girl? Huh. That’s the kind of guy you are? What will your next comment be? “Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve?””

“Okay, guys, there is no need for this! I’m quite sure he didn’t mean any harm.” Mirio tries to butt in. “Love is love, it doesn’t matter what shape it comes in. Thank you for telling us about your boyfriend, Katsuki, I’m really proud of you!”

“Fiancé.” Katsuki mutters under his nose, with a slight blush on his face.

“Okay, I feel like my friendly teasing is not really working with you, Bakugou. I am not homophobic. I’m sorry for assuming your sexuality. You just don’t look gay to me.”

“Oh, sorry, I’ll take my rainbow colored feather scarf out of my bag quickly, what the fuck?!”

“Kats, he has a point. We look extremely… heterosexual.” Eijirou adds.

“Second that.” Kaminari butts in.

“Sexuality has nothing to do with looks or behavior, but I feel like conversation is getting out of hand so please, let’s just… let this one go, Bakugou, my friend. I repeat, he meant no harm.” Mirio decides to end the drama; Tamaki is not having a great time, clearly shaking from the stress.

“You two are my best friends, can you please get along?” Izuku sighs, exasperated.

“I’ll behave.” Rody sighs as well. Katsuki doesn’t say anything just makes his way down once again.

“I wanna go home.” Tamaki mutters into Mirio’s ear who only taps the guy’s shoulder a few times to calm him down.

“Trust me, by the end of this trip they will be best buddies.”

Hm. You certainly doubt that.

~•🥦•~

“Welcome to my Island, young folks!” An old man and an old woman comes up to you guys once you reach the park Rody was talking about.

“Always so modest.” The old woman rolls her eyes at the man next to her, trying her best to keep her smile in place. “Welcome, young heroes! We are absolutely thrilled to have you here. We might not live in Japan, but we know all about your work! Your friend here is more than keen on boasting about his bestie, Deku! The whole village is a fan of you guys, so please be nice if they want a picture! We don’t really have heroes here so… you know. We see a lot of stupid celebrities here but not ones we actually respect, so…”

“I like this hag.” Katsuki adds. The death stare he gets from the woman is worth every penny.

“Hag is a good thing in Katsuki-language. He calls his mother a hag too and trust me, he loves her so much. Absolute mama’s boy he is.” Eijirou tries to save the day.

“I ain’t a mama’s boy, what the fuck?!”

The old man cleans his throat.

“I guess you have a lot of questions about this island, but before you fire away, please let me give you a brief introduction.” The old man says proudly. “This Island is the most expensive tourist destination in the area, mostly, because you can only come here by a private jet. I’ve been trying to get an actual airport here, but the island is so small they don’t want to spend the money on it, so yeah. Most of our customers are celebrities, millionaires, musicians who are supposed to be dead but actually, they are not… uhm… Nevermind. There are only a few hundred people living here, mostly the owners of the restaurants, stores and other staff members. This island has three parts; you have the residential area, the tourist area and “winter wonderland”, up in the mountains. That’s where you guys will be staying.” The man grins. “The tourist area is for the people who come here to rest while “winter wonderland” is for the adventurous folk. This bit around us is for the people who enjoy window shopping and walking around the city, it has several shops, live entertainment, amazing restaurants, several 5 star hotels with saunas, onsens, indoor pools and a lot of cute stuff. The “winter wonderland” area on the other hand is… well…” the man laughs. “First of all, you’ll need to climb up that hill to access your lodge. There are no roads to go up by a car, but trust me, the view will worth all that sweat. It’s also a good starting point if you want to climb the big mountain! If you like hiking, you’ll love this place. You can also order food and goodies from the iPad inside your lodge! We have a few guys with flying quirks who can easily deliver to the area! I must warn you, there is quite a lot of wildlife up there so don’t freak out if you hear noises coming from the forest. We try to feed them as much as we can so they don’t eat our customers, but…”

“Robert, what the fuck.” The old woman sighs, but then she looks at Katsuki’s sparkling eyes and starts laughing. “Looks like that youngster likes dangerous things.”

“I mean, we are heroes. We life for the thrill.” Eijirou grins. On the other hand, Izuku looks like he’s about to throw up.

“Can I stay down here with Sweet Pea, then? I don’t want her to get eaten by wolves.”

The old woman laughs.

“Oh, honey, my husband is just being silly, those animals are lovely. Even the wolves. I stayed up there myself when I was younger and I’m quirkless.”

“Ahh, the good old days! Do you remember when Lady Arianne ate from your hands? Such a huge beast she was, yet she never even barked at you.” Robert looks at his wife with a fond look on his face.

“I miss her.” The woman sighs.

“So why is it winter up here?” Kaminari asks the million dollar question, clearly too impatient to wait.

“That’s my quirk!” The old man grins. “I can change the weather. Permanently. It took me several years to get a yes from the government and I had to buy a whole island to be able to do so but I made it!”

“I thought he’s joking when he said he’ll buy an island one day.” Robert’s wife giggles. “He’s a madman.”

“How do you know Rody?” Izuku barges in, finally looking less constipated.

“Oh! This is my father and mother in law!” Rody grins giddily while the two sigh exasperatedly.

“No, we are not. You are not married to our daughter. I told you to stop spewing bullshit, son.”

“You just called me your son!”

“Fuck.”

“Like mother like daughter, of course she also had to find a madman.” The old woman sighs again with a fond smile on her face.

“You see? I’m a perfect addition to this family. Plus, I’m helping you with customers. I’m super useful! And I bring her over all the time, so really, you should thank me for being able to see her so much!”

“Okay, Rody, now shut the fuck up and lead the way before it gets dark.” Robert taps Rody’s back a few times and makes his way towards the nearest pub that has his face on the logo. “If you have any questions, ask Rody or call us. My throat got dry from all the talking.” He dismisses everyone and for a few seconds there’s only an awkward silence as everyone tries to comprehend all the information they’ve got.

“Okay friends, let’s do some grocery shopping before we go up, okay?” Mirio jumps into the air excitedly, pulling Tamaki with him towards the nearest supermarket.

“Yup! Let’s go!” Eijirou follows like a good puppy and everyone makes their way after them except…

“Izuku?”

“Just go with the others, I just. Want to… look around alone a bit.”

Your heart skips a beat. Is he… not happy? Did you do something wrong? Was that little mess up in the plane enough for him to loose himself in his negative thoughts? Fuck. Fuck.

You can’t help but spiral. You really want him to have fun. You really want to see him smile. You just want him to be the happiest nerd in the whole wide world but somehow, you feel like you are the reason he can’t chill right now. Is it because you are weak? Is he still worried about the beasts?

“Stop overthinking. That’s my job.” Izuku giggles and leaves tiny kisses on your cheeks. “I’ll be fine. Now go. Enjoy their company because I will steal you as soon as we get our cabin key.”

You try to believe him. You must. He’s smiling and he looks happy and it doesn’t look forced.

“Are you sure? You really freaked out when Robert said…”

“Sweet Pea…” Izuku jumps into your words, pulling you closer as he speaks. “Yes, I freaked out but then I remembered who are you with. These guys are the top heroes of our country. I might be injured, but I can take care of any danger with black whip if I need to. I just had a moment, that’s all. Go.” Izuku leaves one last kiss on your mouth and makes his way towards the small, cute shopping street on the other side.

“See you here in an hour?” You yell after him, and Izuku smiles.

“Yes. Pinky promise.”

… Next Chapter!

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

Potato ramble:

- Sorry if the chapter feels dry, but I had to give you a lot of information about the island otherwise you would have been like “okay what the fuck how.” 😂

- So what can be Deku’s problem? Tell me your opinions!

- Also, feel free to ask questions, but before you do:

Katsuki and Rody’s hate for each other will be explained in the next chapter

The reason why Rody’s girlfriend works so hard while her parents are millionaires will also be explained eventually!

- oh, and this is for those who doesn’t like all the other ships in the story: well, I’m sorry, but this is my story and I wanted to do more than just write a character x reader story so uhm… deal with it? Ignore it? Be nice? I would also like to add that I’m an absolute multi shipper so even though I usually write with KiriBaku, I’m an absolute Bakudeku lover as well, so… yeah. All your ships are welcome here. Like, I totally ship Kaminari and Jirou and I’ll be so mad if they won’t be canon. 😂

- On a more personal note: I’ve been feeling like shit mentally for the last few days so if I’m ever late with some chapters, I’m sorry. I’m trying to write every time I feel relatively okay, I still can’t believe I managed to finish this as I was about to make a post about this being delayed so yeah, be patient with me. It’s hard to write about fluff and happiness when you feel anything but that. 😂 but oh well, real life sucks am I right?

TL: @garfieldthomas @porusuniverse @stickygumchewer @sixxze @mily-moo @aei-sedai-moiraine @aymasakusa @katsuari @kenzie-deadly @shiviwrites07 @lukerycyja-reblogs @cloroxisadelectabletreat @coffeent @kisskissshutmydoor @bobcar1 @yazminetrahan @cringefan @ronimacaroni77 @thekookiecorner @dangerousluv1 @emperatris-rinaka @shotos-angelic-whore @angelsdemonsmonsters @norvacaine @rei165 @unofficialmuilover @yao-ai @happydragonfrog @eeerreehhh @vinivave

[ikiiky]

I can't sleep and I'm not really in my right mindset so heres the bridge of the smallest man who ever lived by Taylor swift if it was written about guy fieri by Gordon Ramsey (send help chat)

The Smallest Guy Who Ever Lived

Were you sent by someone, who wanted me unfed

Did you sleep with a steak knife underneath our bed

Were you writing a cookbook

Were you a lobster shell spy?

In 50 years will all this be defrosted in time?

And you'll confess why you were making

And I'll say "this taste like shit!"

Cause it wasn't tasty once it wasn't seasoned

I would've dinned for your sins

Instead I just dinned inside

And you deserve condemnation but you're still gonna fry

Youll slide into restaurants and slip into bars

You crashed my party in your old ass red car

You said normal chefs were boring but you weren't tasting my soup in the morning

You kicked out the kitchen lights

But you're still cooking

And it plain sight you unplugged the fridge

But you are what you did

And I'll season my chicken but I'll never forget

The Smallest Guy who ever lived

[pyromaniacldrt]

*Sounds of taping a mic*

Greetings, mon ami!

Now, Who wants to hear my headcanons of Koki!?

....crick....

Yeah, me too. Let´s start anyways!

Koki used to be a light heavyweight lifter, and when she´s carring heavy things she acts like shes practicing for a competition.

THIS WOMAN IS THE SASS ITSELF. ALL HAIL THE SASSY QUEEN.

She worked as a mechanic in her family´s garage until Chris proposed her to become a member of the Tortuga.

She was Jimmy´s neighbor back when she lived in Manhattan, but then her family moved to the south, and they lost contact.

It was a nice surprise when they saw eachother when they were applying to work in the Wild Kratts project.

Koki dosen´t use her last name anywere because she hates it (Maybe it sounds dumb or something?).

Tbh, it´s a miracle she didn´t quit. This girl was about to die MANY times.

But she´s happier here than in any of her other awfull jobs.

She can´t handle sour or spicy food.

She´s actually feral when nedeed to, and wont hesitate to punch.

Her grandpa taught her everything she knows about using tools. Thats why sometimes she may be using them in a very wrong, dangerous, and old timey way.

When Koki was looking at the curriculum to be a part of the crew, she realized that they might face poachers and unnfriendly fellas, so she learned to use a riffle to hunt them down just in case. Turns out there was a strict "No killing policy" (gee Martin, ok...), and she had to leave the riffle.

Her favourite dish is lobster. Just. Plain lobster.

She had a ton of part time jobs, such as garbage collector, light heavyweight lifter, delivery girl, clown for children parties, model for art students, Donita´s assistant before Dabio, her family´s garage mechanic, Tortuga´s mechanic... Wait what-

Yeah... She hates Donita with her guts, and not only because she´s an awfull boss and even worse designer, but allso because she had to do her dirty work (collecting her "materials", that she freed the moment Donita wasn´t looking, delivering her designs to her shady clients, etc) . Of course, she quited after not even a month.

But hey! She got to meet Martin and Chris!

She comes from a hardworking family, and I mean VERY hardworking. They would always be by her side when she needed it, but she had to work and put tears and sweat in her objetives, not a single peny lended.

That made her very resilient and responsible, but also a bit untrusting of others capacities and lonely.

She got better tho:)

Still needs to develop a culinary taste.

Martin´s - Chris´ - Aviva´s

[satzuboreas]

thinking about the survivors and food.

like, what do you think that they felt when they got to eat their favorite food made in a proper way? (Because i think that most of them don't cook that well, also that food tastes better when someone else makes it most of the time.) do you think that they felt emotional? Do you think that Wilson felt satisfied? That Wendy wish she could split her banana pop with Abigail?

What do you think that they felt on their first time feasting all together? What do you think they felt when they had time to indulge and eat without it being just for survival but because it feels good, it is tasty, especially around people who are also eating food to indulge themselves.

Like, Wigfrid sometimes says "yes, meat!" for something that has no meat just so she can eat it in character.

Do you think that Warly tries sometimes to keep himself together while cooking because he's thinking how his mother will not be eating the dish that he made that day?

Do you think that they would eat all together more than just those times? Do you think that they would split food with one another, not because it is necessary, but because they feel like it? Do you think that they would like to serve each other? Say things like "I think you'll like this." "Try this!" "You said one time that you like these."

Do you think that they sometimes eat because they want to taste something and not just because they're hungry?

Do you think that even though Maxwell's fav dish is lobster, he has a wish for something that he used to eat with his brother?

Do you think Winona keeps an empty chair besides her when she eats because she thinks of Charlie? Do you think that she wishes she could cook something for Charlie? Do you think that she thinks of leaving some food in the dark so Charlie could eat what she's eating in that moment? Especially if it's something that she would think that Charlie would love to eat? And feel a bit sad that in the morning there would just be a plate with cold food in the ground?

Do you think that when WX-78 was still human, Wagstaff would have to make them eat something because they would go days without it because they wouldn't even think about such things? Do you think that they would eat together in silence? I think that they like more sweet things but would not say that. They would like hot cocoa and hate dark coffee, "IT'S JUST HOT BEAN JUICE." [plain text: "it's just hot bean juice."] Did they had a favorite pastry shop?

Do you think Wendy would start sharing her food with her uncle?

Do you think that Webber would not eat his vegetables on purpose just so an adult figure could go up to him and say something like "That's good for you." "These are pretty tasty, you know?" just like his mother would do to him?

Would Wanda take her time while feasting? Take her time to taste what she's eating?

Do you think Willow felt happy to eat so many good things and have a chance to eat around people she likes? Even that it is in a hellhole, it felt like home?

Was Charlie the type of kid to put what she didn't like on Winona's plate so Winona would eat it? Do you think Winona misses that? Do you think Charlie feels like she wants a home cooked meal? Would she like a hot stew?

Just a lot of thinking