#Personalization engines

[i-dont-watch-movies-or-tv]

I feel like the age of having a "burner email" is gone. Out of curiosity,

[the-sassy-composer]

Good job audio drama creators let's keep it up 👏

[badolmen]

They don’t even attempt to assassinate US politicians anymore. You notice that? Not since the anthrax scare back for… who was it, Barack? And even that… pathetic. This new generation has no respect for an honest hitman. I’m not sure this new generation has any honest hitman - you see that shit with Boeing? Sloppy, fucking disgraceful - you kill the whistleblowers before they get halfway to a lawsuit. What kind of fucking amateur is doing faked suicides the night before testimony? Goddamn greenhorns. Back in my day someone tried to shoot Ronald Reagan in broad daylight. There used to be bomb threats to Congress. I took out a few union leaders in the utilities sector myself. Today’s generation? Won’t even threaten to throw a punch - not even over on that - what’s it now, ‘X’? They got no guts. None! And they don’t even have poor impulse control to boot! Too much of that - that panopticon anxiety bullshit. “Oh what if I get a called out post???” People used to send the president letters full of bioweapons. In the mail! Today’s generation? Not a chance. All because of woke.

[nartothelar]

guys do you want to see the coolest thing ever

ehehe vintage 2000 thomas and friends mini moving keychain!!!

[bubblesbinxs]

it’s currently 2am where i am so technically 4th of april.. Happy 2 Years ISWM !!!!!!!

[wolfram-but-art]

i'm suffering so he suffers with me

[dreamerdrop]

Julian Bashir walks a very fine, maddening line between “self-loathing imposter syndrome who knows almost everyone who speaks to him for more than a minute finds him insufferable” and “incredibly self assured and annoyingly arrogant to the point of a minor god complex”.

He knows he’s attractive, he thinks he’s charming as all hell, he knows he’s the smartest person in the room (while also being acutely aware he’s going to put his foot in his mouth any second now), and he just swings wildly between “I don’t deserve anything I have, none of this is mine, my life is not my own, I am a monster” and “HELL YEAH LOOK HOW COOL AND SMART I AM GUYS ARE YOU LOOKING ARE YOU LOOKING”.

And then there’s episodes that reveal that underneath that annoying arrogance, at the very core of who he is, he really, really just wants to help people, and if he fucks that up he WILL take it personally and hold himself responsible even if there’s no way he could have known and like. Can you imagine what his first patient death was like for him. Can you imagine what a fucking nightmare his brain must be 24/7.

He is somehow as inherently self assured as he is in need of constant validation for his ego because you can SEE him break a little when that ego fails him, even a little, and it’s just.

He’s very fun to write. I hate him. (I love him so much, but oh my god.)

[carsthatnevermadeitetc]

Eunos Cosmo Type E, 1990. The only series production car to be powered by a triple-rotor Wankel engine, the E (Elegant) version was the luxury flagship and was the most expensive car Mazda has ever marketed. It was also the first car to come with a built-in GPS navigation system. It remained a Japanese market only car though some have subsequently been exported. The 276hp 20B-REW engine was limited to 180 km/h (111.8 mph) to comply with Japanese regulations, but was capable of 255 km/h (158.4 mph) unrestricted.

[elation-station]

the town bisexuals are at your door it is time for you to pick a bride

[meltedbionics]

it’s a bit cold out! 🧊

[the-sassy-composer]

I love that my wife supports me as a sound designer because sometimes she just brings me random objects that she thinks I can make cool sounds with. Yesterday she came into my office and said "I have a present for you I think you'll love" (it was a burlap sack full of shredded paper and she was right, I DID love it).

[misscouchpotatobew]

THE WAY THEY IGNORE ROLFE LMAO

He just wants them to do his name 😭

They even do Earl but not Rolfe! so mean lol

[leclercskiesahead]

Rained in and can’t go out for quali therefore become kids playing in the school computer lab

[citruslullabies]

what about platonic swansea or anya hcs?

Of course darling!!

Swansea Mouthwashing

Platonic (completely!!)

Pre-crash Swansea:

Depending on your job, he is either going to ignore you or talk down to you at first

He's really just a tired old man, don't pay him any mind

But he'll eventually warm up to you in a fatherly manner

The occasional pat on the back or asking you to hold a flashlight for him

For the love of God. Hold. Still.

But if you're friends with Daisuke, which lets face it, you probably are

He probably warms up to you a little faster

Swansea is annoyed by Daisuke sometimes sure, but he's like family

And seeing you two goof around, it brings a small smile to his face

.. untillll he barks orders at you guys

Classic dad behavior

You and Daisuke were goofing around with tools and such, with Daisuke pretending to be a Pikachu with a faulty electrical wire he was supposed to be fixing. You snorted while leaning back and grabbing a wrench, pretending to be a Cubone and gently bop him on the head. Swansea watched from a distance, sighing from how early it was but smiling at how you two managed to make anything a game. Even if you both got side-tracked by it. He cleared his throat and returned to a neutral expression, putting a hand on his hip. "Both of you get back to work! You two and your stupid pokemon.." he'd grumble, watching you both scurry back to work. Both of you were his idiots.

He also will not understand any references at all you make

"pop off queen" "what the fuck did you just say to me??"

He's a goofy old man and we love him

He's also super defensive over you and Daisuke

You guys are like his kids

Post-crash Swansea:

He's more on edge

He tries to look out for you and Daisuke, but he's only one guy

When he comes across that cyropod.. he's hoping that you and Daisuke can both squeeze in.

And his sobriety goes down the drain

Some nights he'll cry to you when you're alone

He'll say that he wasted his life away and never did anything to impact the world

And no matter how much you comfort him, he sobs more and more.

He is losing it

And whenever he loses Daisuke, shit goes down the drain

And whenever Jimmy gets the gun.. to Swansea's horror, Jimmy ended up shooting you in the stomach

He couldn't even help you in time

He feels shitty in his final moments.

How he couldn't help Anya, how he couldn't help Daisuke, and how he couldn't help you

At least he doesn't have to worry about if you and Daisuke can fit in the pod together anymore

Thanks for requesting darling!

[inbabylontheywept]

The Fridges. Oh My God, The Fridges.

This is a continuation of the last piece I wrote on the weird shit that happens in classified facilities. The building I work in has somewhere around 30-35 people in it. It also has around 20 fridges. There's kind of a saga that goes into this, so I'll start with the first part: The Hoarding.

The building has an insane overabundance of space. They just keep adding new rooms every time an old room needs an update, so it just sprawls on forever. There's also an extremely limited ability to get anyone who does not work full time in the building, into the building. This means that while we work on missiles, we also clean our own desks and vacuum the floors and mop and all of those other tasks that most places would consider "non-engineer work." This is fine if it's something anyone with a body can do, but this causes problems when you're looking at the physical limits of engineers. Namely, we are not very muscular people.

Thus, if something needs to get manhandled into a space, it gets manhandled by whatever group of nerds you can bribe, threaten, or guilt into joining you. When a fridge dies, it is a motherfucker to remove it from the building, so they often just...didn't. What they did instead was get the fridges onto dolleys, which isn't too bad, wheel those dolleys to the elevator, and then park them in a relatively empty part of the basement that we shall call The Graveyard of Fridges. This wasn't originally meant to be a permanent solution, but when you have space but lack muscles, it can become permanent really fast. Eventually, someone realized that you can padlock the fronts of the fridges and use them as document storage, which has the added perk of meaning that the people on site don't have to assemble more filing cabinets. Everyone here hates assembling filing cabinets. It's fucking terrible. (It is worth noting that in this era, you would occasionally get directions to a secret file that looked like "1970's model, lime green, left crisper.")

We will call this the peak of the Hoarding Era. It is followed by the Mechanical Engineering Era.

Around 2015, it was realized that the group needed engineers familiar with industrial machinery, and not just standard electronics, so mechanical engineers (MEs) began to get hired. The new ME's made it a sort of rite of passage for proceeding new hires to repair an old fridge. So the site went from having 4 functioning fridges and 15ish being used for document storage to around 15 functioning fridges and 4 used for file storage.

Every time a fridge got fixed, people just put them back on the dolley, wheeled them back in the elevator, and got them wedged in their personal office spaces. If you were a bigwig, you might be able to get dibs on your own personal fridge, and if you were a new guy confined to the cubicle jungle you might have to share one with four or five other guys. But it was still a ludicrous amount of fridge space.

And that is how a base with 35 people on it wound up with 15 fridges.

[wolfram-but-art]

bazoink