i keep thinking about chris’s “i tried complaining once, it didn’t work” line and also how he’s super witty and funny and perceptive and also A Teenager and how that all would influence the way he navigates a world that isn’t always accessible to him…
just imagining post-ladder-truck-crush-injury buck and chris both using crutches while buck is still getting used to things suddenly being inaccessible to him and getting like, little zingers of insights and life lessons from his best friend’s kid while out and about. chris showing him how he gets up and down the tall curbs when a sidewalk is blocked off unexpectedly, and very loudly and often proclaiming his distain for the “fuck-you” steps (the 1-2 tiny steps at the front doors of houses and buildings that immediately make that entrance no longer accessible)
like buck researches a couple of easy activities for them to try while he’s is still healing and tired and is looking into the establishment’s accessibility accommodations, and hey! the place says on the website that they’re wheelchair friendly! that usually covers his and chris’s bases, so they should be good to go. but when they get there it turns out that, while there IS an accessible entrance with a “ramp”, it’s actually the cargo loading zone that’s literally on the other side of the building which would require them to walk a couple of extra blocks up and back down the street on the other side. obviously they can still get in, but buck feels awful because that’s not what he wanted out of his preparedness. chris just tells him “it’s okay, it happens a lot actually”, and buck is even MORE sad about it, but chris just conspiratorially adds “this is my favorite kind” and starts making his way towards the set of like, idk eight stairs at the front of this building. buck is obviously confused and looks at eddie who just shakes his head fondly, sighs and says “yeah, he does this sometimes” before encouraging buck to follow. when buck finally reaches chris, he’s balancing his crutches on the first stair and turns to buck to whisper “now we get to make them feel bad about it” and proceeds to very feebly, very slowly—and buck has seen chris rough and tumble and rocket his way through things that could (and do) trip him up, this is the most dramatic act of put-upon helplessness buck has EVER seen from this kid—make his way up the stairs. he even sticks his bottom lip out into a little pout for good measure. one of the staff sees them through the glass doors and comes out to tell them about the “ramp” in the back of the building, and before buck can even think of what to say in response, chris is just telling them, very sadly, that he “wouldn’t be able to walk that far without getting too tired 😔😔😔” and continues his hammed-up, sad, slow trek up the stairs while a very harried staff member kind of hovers, not knowing what to do.
buck has to bite his cheek to keep himself from laughing at chris’ act, and then again at the face the staff member makes when they catch sight of buck too, as he begins very dutifully following chris’s lead, eddie in their wake.
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janeway becoming so fixated on keeping her crew safe she curses them with immortality would be kind of a baller idea for a fic
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You could just leave this here, happy and satisfied as is…
…But thats not how things get to end, right?
Maybe one day they can be happy together. But not like this. Not when Infected can barely remember who he’s with, and not when Lampert is so scared of contracting the parasite himself.
One of these days I’ll do a full summary of how I interpret their dynamic. Both as friends and as a ship. I see them as having a queer-platonic relationship for the most part though.
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I finally finished reading the fourth volume of svsss in full, and thing is--the first time through I only read the bingqiu content because I was ravenous for more of their happy ending.
Turns out that was a perilous mistake.
Because I started reading the airplane extras. And I swear to god. MXTX is trying to kill me
What do you MEAN demon lord Binghe was sitting on his big fucking throne. All stoic and forbidding. Surrounded by his demon generals who don't know shit about human courtship. Asking them what he should do, fully demoralized by constant rejections from sqq, only to have airplane tell him to act more pathetic and needy. Which is already hysterically funny and insane, UNTIL LBH'S RESPONSE IS THIS, KILLING ME INSTANTLY:
LUO BINGHE. WHY DOES HE SAY IT LIKE: "I already tried that, didn't work--nothing works :/ not mean, not maidenly, not housewife, not spicy, not capable disciple. Is doubling down on clingy really all it will take? What's a born hater with only one love in his life to do????"
The dichotomy of him sitting there like 'how can I reach the unfathomable depths of shizun's heart?' A HEART HE'S ALREADY WON OVER, MIND and then in the Holy Mausoleum solving the puzzle without blinking and being like 'oh yeah you just have to hit the acupoints, no sweat.' Literally the comedy writes itself I'm so--
How am I supposed to be normal about this. MXTX understands the juicy quintessential queer joy of a person with the world's power at their fingertips wishing only for love. Willing to do anything to earn that love, when unbeknownst to them it's already been freely given. Totally not screaming and yelling and clawing at the walls
And that's not even touching airplane's uproarious account of events. The way he's like 'lol what's next, lbh and sqq are best friends now? smfh' only to see lbh TACKLE SQQ LOVINGLY. FOR SQQ TO BE BASHFUL ABOUT IT BUT SO SO FOND OF THE LITTLE SCAMP. This when we've been experiencing sqq's constant inner monologue of 'I'm so cool and so dignified about my role, truly the epitome of propriety and poser-level fortitude.' Meanwhile, in their universe:
Airplane constantly flaming???? Sqq and lbh in his observations????? His absolute bewilderment and confusion????? Legendary. No notes every single second of this shit was hilarious.
Airplane's comment that sqq + older adolescent lbh traveling together was just watching a couple in their honeymoon phase. OR the fact that lbh is exceedingly petty and refuses to share their food in the wake of airplane's interruption of their time together, until sqq relents sheepishly and insists airplane eat what's left (ONLY AFTER PLACATING LBH WITH MORE FOOD FROM HIS PLATE, SOBBING)
Watching airplane salivate over Mobei-Jun and acting like that's totally normal behavior. Finding out mbj and airplane got together first. Finding out sqq encouraged airplane. LIKE THIS. WHILE HE IS STILL IN DENIAL ABOUT HIS OWN FEELINGS:
Mobei-jun clearly thinking their arrangement is a forever thing, heartbroken his human abandoned him with all the hapless fury of a scorned wife swept away by false promises of fidelity. Airplane writing demons to be the type to beat up their crush lovingly and still unable to connect the dots about mbj's feelings. Mbj letting him go and respecting his wishes, only relenting when there's indication airplane was poorly processing his own feelings and didn't actually want to leave. Mbj caring for him and listening to him as soon as airplane voices what he needs directly and with clarity. None of these gays are functional and it's everything to me
Unrelated, but I physically can't hold this information in anymore:
I'm still reeling from younger lbh having his sexual awakening from the image of sqq wrapped in the immortal binding cables. Condemn me as you like he was so, so real for that.
And no I will not be taking any comments about how luo bingge couldn't bear to see luo binghe cherished in ways he never got to have and all the haunting implications of that. I will also not be taking any comments about luo binghe's instinct to look for sqq in that alternate universe, only to be shaken to the very core to be unable to find his shizun anywhere. The unspeakable and latent horror of his relentless mind likely piecing together what happened, but unable to say it; to suspect what is true, and live with the harrowing confusion of his double's actions. To blame himself, to assume that he had let his anger get the better of him in that world and result in unspeakable folly...
I also refuse to talk about how heartrending it is to hear Tianlang-jun weakly say "In the end, I really can't bring myself to hate humans." The implication that the foolishness of that hope and bright-eyed fondness--the very thing that put him through such unspeakable agony--couldn't be beaten out of him entirely. To discover that his faith in Su Xiyan hadn't been misplaced, to the contrary: his beloved hadn't scorned him at all, but rather fought to the miserable end to protect the fruition of their genuine feelings of love when she couldn't protect tlj or herself.
How MXTX has sqq deliberately draw parallels between their situation and that of ygy+sj and tlj+sx; desperately wishing it might not be too late for them. The concept of breaking cycles of abuse and harm pervasive throughout the newly devised story, how it evolves for the better only when love takes the place of power, pride, and domination. How the moment sqq chooses vulnerability instead of saving face, the genre shifts to the so-called "cringe" girly genre where most if not every character is more fulfilled, more true to themselves. How the "male-oriented" former genre was aimlessly sensationalized and sexualized, how it was a sustained performance of aspirational toxic masculinity. How men objectify other men without end. All of the unspoken gendered implications that come with that.
Anyways. Going to go put my head in a sandbox and try to process everything I just witnessed because even a second reading is not enough to find a modicum of closure.
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unhinged observation - we all know their colours don't match the traditional ones, but I've never noticed before that on the portraits they put Jeff in red and Virgil in green, but then they swap them over when we actually see them. In fact, //pause while Len goes to look// when they're in TB3, they're all wearing red - like all the space-rated suits, specifically are red. //Goes to check again// and Gordon and Virg are in green with TB2 in the opening rescue to match Jeff as well.
Does that mean, in 2004 verse, they wear whichever colour matches the 'bird they're currently flying because other than them needing 5 suits each... that's pretty cool can't lie good for them
ignoring the fact they look the same, I can be like ??? well yellow must be wetsuits, red is space rated?? Green is ?? tougher maybe, blue is for however many G's TB1 hits a body with when they're going crazy speeds, orange is a spacesuit for living in space etc etc
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