#Penelope Garcia

[foundfam2754]

these two are my fav friendship

JJ is not Spencer's best friend, Penelope is

This is not an opinion it's a fact

And if you don't agree you can argue with the fucking wall 🧱

Bc it's true, Penelope is Spencer's best friend NOT JJ

[vigilante-3073]

POTS

Spencer Reid x Female Reader

Summary: Y/N suffers from POTS and experiences a fainting spell at work, luckily Spencer is there to catch her.

TW: Mentions of medical conditions/fainting, medical terms, pre-established relationship.

Y/N had been diagnosed with Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome just under a year ago. She had been experiencing symptoms for quite a while before her diagnosis and it felt like everything finally made sense. Y/N had been managing her condition well up until this point, but she still had bad days.

Y/N was a member of the Behavioral Analysis Unit and she was a profiler. She didn't carry a gun, her intellect was her weapon and she liked it that way. Guns had always made her uncomfortable and Y/N preferred to be behind the scenes instead of on the front line.

Y/N continued to add to a relatively impressive knowledge base over the years, adding degrees in relevant fields. Y/N currently possessed Doctorates in Abnormal Psychology and Behavioral Psychology, she had a Degree in both Criminology and Criminal Psychology. She also had a Graduate degree in Criminal Justice and was working on getting her Bachelor's degree in Child Psychology.

Her resume was impressive and Gideon hired her on the spot, he knew that she could contribute a large wealth of knowledge to the team.

Y/N clicked with Spencer quickly and they became inseparable as time went on. They sat beside each other in the bullpen and talked every day without fail.

It took three years of working together before Spencer was finally able to admit that he had feelings for her. Spencer asked her out on a date, taking her to dinner at their favorite restaurant before watching a movie at the theater.

It was perfect and they had been together since.

Y/N and Spencer had always done their best to keep their relationship separate from their work life. Y/N tended to be a rather private person and Spencer was completely on board with following her lead on the matter.

Hotch was the only one who knew about their relationship, they informed him and human resources but kept things between them for the most part.

Spencer could definitely see a future with Y/N, he knew that they would have to tell the team at some point but it was nice to have this one thing be entirely their's. It was hard work to keep a secret from a group of people who made skilled observations for a living.

Since they started dating, Spencer had become rather skilled at noticing when her condition was giving her a rough time. Y/N had learned that standing for long periods of time, being in hot places, strenuous exercise and changing positions too quickly had the biggest effect on her. Her heart would race and her blood pressure would plummet which could lead her to get incredibly dizzy or even lose consciousness.

Spencer always made sure to monitor her fluid and salt intake, offering snacks to her throughout the day to make sure she was alright. He was incredibly caring and went about it in a way that didn't make her feel like it was a chore to him.

...

Y/N made her way into the briefing room, taking her seat at the table beside Spencer. Hotch followed closely behind her, sitting down and opening his file. Garcia went through the briefing, clicking through the crime scene photos as she went over the case.

"Alright, we need to get to Texas. Wheels up in thirty," Hotch stated, closing his file and standing up.

The team followed after him, closing their case files and exiting the conference room to get their bags. Spencer stood up, holding his copy of the file with his bag slung over his shoulder, lingering by the table as he waited for Y/N.

Y/N stood up from her seat, closing her eyes as a sudden wave of dizziness hit her. She swayed on her feet, Spencer dropped his bag and file, stepping forward quickly. He wrapped his arm around her waist, resting his other hand on her head and holding her close to his chest.

"Spencer," She mumbled, heart pounding in her chest as she lost consciousness.

Her knees buckled and her body leaned heavily into his chest, Spencer eased her down to the floor carefully. He laid her on her back, shrugging off his blazer and laying it over her body.

Spencer pulled a chair over, elevating her legs to help the blood return to her heart. He shifted back over to her head, sitting by her side and providing silent support as he waited for her to come back around.

Spencer's fingers settled on her wrist, fingers resting on her pulse and finding himself shocked at how high her heart rate was. Garcia made her way back into the room, she gasped softly when she saw her coworkers on the floor.

"What happened? Is she okay?" Garcia asked, Spencer nodded.

"She has a condition. When she stands up to fast, her heart rate speeds up and her blood pressure drops," Spencer stated.

"Do we need to call an ambulance?" Garcia asked, Spencer shook his head.

"She'll be fine. Just takes her a minute to come back around," Spencer assured.

"I can get her some water if that would help," Garcia offered.

"That would be great. Thank you," Spencer stated, she nodded and rushed back out of the room.

Spencer looked down at Y/N, he could feel her heart beat returning to normal. Y/N shifted, eyes fluttering open as she stared up at him.

"You're okay," He assured with a gentle smile.

Y/N shifted, settling her legs on the floor and sitting up slowly. She made a soft noise, closing her eyes as her vision swam once again.

Spencer shifted up behind her, gently guiding her body back to rest against his chest, "Don't rush," He said.

Her head dropped back onto his shoulder, her eyes drifting closed, "I don't feel good," She mumbled.

"I'm sorry... Garcia is getting you some water and I have a couple snacks in my bag," Spencer offered.

"Did Garcia see me pass out?" Y/N asked softly.

"No, it was just you and me in here. She came in after," Spencer said, Y/N nodded.

Garcia made her way into the conference room, "Oh, honeybunch, you're back. I brought you some water," Garcia said, holding out the cup of water.

Spencer took the cup from her hand, holding it up for Y/N and allowing her to take a sip, "Can you pass me my bag? I have some snacks for her in there," Spencer said.

Garcia nodded, moving around the table and grabbing Spencer's bag from the back of his chair. She carried it over and set it on the floor beside him.

Spencer set the cup down, unzipping his bag and sifting around the contents before he found what he was looking for. He pulled out a granola bar and a packet of salt, he reached in front of Y/N and tore open the packet.

Spencer lifted the pack up, dumping the salt onto her tongue before quickly passing her the glass of water.

Y/N grimaced, taking the cup and drinking the rest of the water. Spencer picked up the granola bar, "Do you want a snack now? Or do you want to wait?" He asked.

"Wait," She stated, he nodded and put the granola bar back into his bag.

"How do you feel?" Garcia asked.

"Awful, but it'll pass," Y/N answered.

"Do you want me to tell Hotch? I'm sure you can help over video chat if you stay behind," Garcia offered.

"No, I'm fine, Garcia. It just takes me a minute," Y/N assured.

"Did you eat breakfast?" Spencer questioned.

Y/N hesitated, "I was running late this morning," She said softly.

"We can pick something up for you on the way to the plane," Spencer said, Y/N nodded.

"Do you think you're ready to get up? Or do you want to sit for a bit longer?" Spencer asked, his hand absent-mindedly rubbing over the skin of her bicep.

"I think I'm okay," Y/N said.

Spencer stood up from behind her, moving around and holding out his hands to her. Y/N settled her hands in his, allowing him to pull her to her feet slowly.

"You okay?" He asked, looking down at her.

Y/N nodded, Spencer bent down and picked up his blazer from the floor. He grabbed his case file and his bag, slinging the strap over his shoulder. Spencer rested his hand on Y/N's back and guided her out of the conference room.

Garcia watched them leave, a small smile settling on her face as she watched how gentle he was with her. Her face suddenly fell, "Oh my god," She muttered.

...

The case went by quickly and everyone returned to Quantico, settling at their desks and completing their paperwork. Y/N filled out her documents easily, pen gliding across the page as she worked.

Spencer looked over at her, watching her work for a moment before his gaze quickly swept the room for any prying eyes.

His eyes returned to Y/N, he leaned over slightly, "Hey, Y/N," He called softly.

Y/N looked over at him, "Do you want to get dinner together after we're done?" He asked.

"I'd love to," She smiled.

"Okay," Spencer nodded, smiling back at her.

The pair returned to their work quietly, completing their reports and turning them in before packing up.

Y/N pulled on her coat and purse, waiting for Spencer before the pair walked out of the bullpen together. They stepped into the elevator and Y/N pressed the button for the main level, the couple chatted about restaurants during the ride down.

Y/N and Spencer made their way out of the building and into the parking garage. Spencer followed Y/N to her car, he looked around the parking structure before he took Y/N's hand in his. Spencer slowed to a stop, giving her hand a gentle tug.

Y/N turned to face him, "What are you doing?" She questioned.

He shrugged, taking a step closer to her and pressing a gentle kiss to her lips. Y/N's eyes fluttered shut, smiling up at him as he pulled away.

"What was that for?" She questioned.

"I just love you," Spencer shrugged.

"I love you too," Y/N replied, adjusting the collar of his coat.

"No way!" Someone yelled.

Spencer turned to see Morgan approaching them with a wide grin, "Garcia told me you guys were together and I thought she was full of it. I thought there was no way that pretty boy actually made a move. Then I see you two smooching away out here," Morgan teased.

"I guess the cat's out of the bag," Spencer said.

"I guess so," Y/N nodded.

"How long has the cat been in the bag exactly?" Morgan asked.

"Year and a half," Spencer shrugged.

"You kept this a secret for over a year? I'm impressed," Morgan nodded.

"I just didn't want to make things awkward within the team," Y/N stated.

"Are you kidding? There's been a betting pool for years about when you two would finally get together," Morgan said.

"Are you serious? Who bet?" Spencer asked.

Morgan hesitated, "Pretty much everyone," He said.

"I can't believe it," Y/N said, shaking her head with a soft smile.

"So, now that everyone knows about you two," Morgan started.

"Wait, everyone?" Y/N asked.

"Yeah, obviously, Garcia was the first one to figure it out. She told anyone who'd listen," Morgan said.

Y/N's cheeks flushed, "I was wondering if the rest of the team and I could join you two for dinner. Meal is on Emily because she won the bet," Morgan offered.

Spencer looked over at Y/N, he gave her hand a gentle squeeze before returning his attention to their friend.

"That would be great," He nodded.

"Perfect! I'll let the people know," Morgan smiled, turning around and making his way back to the office.

Y/N shook her head, "All that because you couldn't wait to kiss me until we got home," She teased.

"I would kiss you every minute of every day if I could," Spencer stated.

"I love you," Y/N said, leaning in and giving him another gentle kiss before pulling away.

"I didn't expect our relationship to cause such a stir in the office, but I'm glad it's out in the open now," Spencer said, Y/N nodded.

"Wait until they find out we've been living together for six months. They'll lose their minds," Y/N smiled.

[gold-onthe-inside]

pair programming - part ii

navigator

who? spencer reid (s3) x analyst!reader summary: what happens after your roommate and better half is shot on the doorstep of your building by her date. turns out, you're support network seems to have more nodes that you'd thought. content warnings: reference to guns + gunshot injury, surgery, blood word count: 2.1k a/n: realised after writing this that reader has more interactions with everyone on the team than she does with penelope oops

Spencer handed you a cup of tea, sitting down beside you in the hospital waiting room, the rest of the team milling around, waiting for news on Penelope’s surgery. You hadn’t said a word about what happened, the team relying on a police officer and a paramedic’s account while you sat there in catatonic shock, blood staining your white shirt, your hoodie doing more work in hiding it. You could still feel the blood on your hands, stained from pressing down on Penelope’s gunshot wound.

Spencer didn’t know what to do or say, just pressing the warm beverage into your hands, Emily and JJ murmuring in the corner.

“Has anyone told Morgan yet?”

“He isn’t answering the phone.”

“Is she?”

“Still in shock. Hasn’t said a word.”

“And Penelope?”

“All we know is a gunshot wound to the chest, and that they’re operating now.”

Spencer’s eyes are still on you, a shell of yourself, unable to reconcile the person he sees with the person he knows. He knows you deal with threats far greater than the ones they do — they’ve just come back from arresting a cannibal, you prevent military secrets getting out and uncover espionage attempts. But it’s from the safety of a digital interface, the day to day of it so mundane that it makes him want to pull his eyeballs out. Your job doesn’t get you shot. Technically, Penelope’s job shouldn’t have gotten her shot either.

No-one was paying attention to him, or to you, which is why he’s on his knees in front of you, aligning his gaze with yours, and does one of the few things he knows how to do; explaining. He put the tea down on the floor, taking hold of your hands, your eyes distant, your fingers cold. If he couldn’t do anything for Penelope, maybe there was something he could do for you.

“When the brain experiences trauma it has an affect on the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous system.” He said the words quietly, a distraction technique to bring your focus to something, even if it was nothing. “The physiological response is a fight or flight response. When your brain is unable to process the situation, it freezes in an effort to protect your mind and body. You might feel numb, or cry, or rage. You might just sit there, emotionally unable to move. You might dissociate, and feel like nothing around you is real, or that it‘s actually happening to someone else.” He squeezed your hands, hoping for a response. It felt like you weren’t even there.

“I can’t imagine how scared you must be, and I’m not going to try and tell you that everything will be okay, because it may not-,” and he hated saying the words, they felt like a lie in his mouth, but it was the truth “-but whatever happens next, I am here. I won’t leave, not unless you ask me to.”

“I can’t lose her,” you whispered. Thank god, Spencer thought as he looked at you again, and while he knew there wasn’t anything he could say that would make it all better, he also knew that the fact that you were finally verbal was probably a positive. You hadn’t said a word in hours.

“I know,” he said quietly. The team still milled around, waiting, the hospital buzzing with activity, but he felt like the words were just his and yours, the intimacy of the two of you cocooned away from the world.

"I don't..." You struggled to get the words out. "She's all I have." He watched as the tears welled in your eyes, watched as they fell down your cheeks. He wanted to reach out, to brush them away, and he hesitated, wondering what he possibly could do to comfort you.

Instead he pulled you towards him, wrapping you in his arms, a hug, and hoped that he wasn’t being too forward, and you crushed yourself against his chest, hugging him back. He ran a hand up and down your back as he held you to him, his cheek against the side of your head.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, and he didn’t know if he was apologising for Penelope’s injuries, or the fact that he couldn’t save her, or that he hadn’t been there, or because there was nothing he could do to make it better. He was just sorry.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to background check this guy?” you asked, offering Penelope your eyeliner as she finished curling her hair and she rolled her eyes.

“God, you sound like Derek,” she retorted spitefully and you frowned. It was unlike her to be say his name with such anger, when it was usually said with love, fondness, occasional lust, and just in an overall dreamy fashion. A part of you had always wondered if there was more to their relationship than just platonic friendship.

“Alright,” you replied, letting it go. Penelope was a grown woman, she could make her own decisions… and was also equally capable of running a background check as, if not more, thorough as you would have. You tried not to look at the mess that your shared bathroom had turned into, make-up supplied and jewellery scattered over the counter, leaving her to do her thing. “And I better not get a text saying you’re bringing him upstairs,” you called out as you leave.

“This is just wrong,” you murmured, looking at Penelope’s pale, all but lifeless body, tubes running from her nose and arms, wires strapped to her chest, the suite silent but for the steady beep of the heart monitor. You still hadn’t moved from the foot of the bed, willing yourself not to cry. You were not going to be one of those family members who couldn’t get a grip of themselves. You especially refused to become a blubbering mess in front of her co-workers.

“I know,” Spencer said softly, wanting to take your hand again, but holding himself back. He still never knew where he stood with you. Hell, he didn’t know how to process what was going on for him — the only thing he knew he had to do was stabilise you, never mind himself.

You finally manage to put one step in front of the other, going towards Penelope and Spencer could see your hand shaking as you gingerly took hers, the way you blinked back tears, almost refusing to breathe because you were convinced the only thing that would come out would be a sob. Spencer swallowed, moving to draw the curtains over the windows, closing the doors so it was only the three of you in the room, and kept his back turned as you finally gave in to the squeezing grip your lungs had on your heart, sinking into the chair as you cried, gripping the hand that wouldn’t squeeze back.

You started awake when you felt a large hand on your shoulder, shaking you gently, and it’s Aaron standing over you. “Sorry,” you mustered, wiping away dried tear tracks and he simply pulled up a chair beside you.

“I know it’s been a long night,” he said softly, leaning on his knees, looking at you kindly. “But we need your help.” He watches you nod, taking in a deep breath.

“Anything,” you said, a lot calmer now.

“We need to get some kind of identification on this guy,” Aaron told you, his voice measured and even and a part of you was jealous you couldn’t be as calm as he was, and partly angry that he could be this calm with Penelope this way.

“She said his name was Colby,” you said, remembering the joke you had made when she told you.

“Like the cheese?” you asked, raising an eyebrow skeptically and she scoffed.

“Do not ruin this for me,” she retorted, pointing her laptop charger at you like a wand. “He’s cute and he actually likes me. Do you even remember the last time I’ve been asked out?”

“That doesn’t mean you should go out with anyone who asks,” you replied. “I mean, what kind of person doesn’t turn on auto-save?” It earns you a glare from her and you quieten, turning back to your book.

You shook your head, trying to focus on your screen, set up right beside Penelope, refusing to leave her side even as she slept, and neither did Derek or Spencer, the former practically breathing down your neck. You glanced up at Spencer, a plea in your eyes to get him off your back, and he makes a pitiful attempt of asking Derek if he wants to go get a coffee with him, which he denies and so Spencer shrugged, so you let out a breath, focusing on what you were doing.

“There’s nothing on a James Colby Baylor,” you said, sounding tired, running a hand through your hair, then settling it back on your keyboard.

“If he knew Penelope was FBI, then maybe he used a pseudonym,” Spencer offered, his hands in his pockets, standing across from you. “Try using the same combination of letters, JCB.”

“I’m gonna need more parameters than just three letters,” you retorted, looking up at him.

“Check anyone who rented a white sedan in the last 24 hours,” Derek said, still leaning over you and you desperately wanted to hit the both of them. Repeatedly. Instead, you check car rentals across the city matching the description, matching the restaurant that they had gone to, adding your facial recognition program to look for blonde men with blue eyes. “Plus some kind of job in the justice department. Try law enforcement, former military, stuff like that,” Derek added. “He knew enough to use legal terms, but not enough to know city attorneys don’t try criminal cases. Law school dropout, failed the bar exam—”

“Jason Clark Battle,” you told him, pulling up the picture of him and you swallowed. That was him. The guy you’d seen run away from the front of your building after you heard the gunshot. Your hands curled into fists, oblivious to Derek calling Aaron about it, charging out the door. Spencer didn’t particularly want to leave either of you, but he muttered a quick, ‘Be right back’ before disappearing.

You handed Derek a mug of coffee while Penelope slept in her own bed, the door left open in case she needed either of them. He’s set up on your couch, a blanket and pillows, his gun set on the coffee table, a single light left on so he can read the file. “Can’t sleep either, huh?” he asked you and you shrugged, taking a seat on the corner of the coffee table.

“He shot her on the doorstep, Morgan,” you said quietly. “If I hadn’t been at home…”

Morgan placed his hand on your knee, warm and comforting, and even though you had made fun of him being here, calling him Penelope’s ‘guard dog’, deep down, you were glad he was here. “There’s a lot that went wrong that night,” he said smoothly, his voice low. “Don’t eat at yourself worrying about how it could have been worse.”

You huffed a little. “You mean like you’ve been doing?” you asked, looking at him pointedly and he narrowed his eyes at you.

“You sure you aren’t a profiler?” he asked, noticing the slight hint of a smile on your face as you shrug.

“I guess we’re both wired the same way,” you said, instead of the retort you had lined up in your head. “Protecting the people we care about, blaming ourselves when they get hurt.” You glanced at Penelope’s room, her open door. “She’s all I have, Morgan.” And maybe it’s the late night, the anxiety coursing through your body, the thing that makes it impossible to sleep, that starts in your head and works its way to your chest, but you can’t seem to stop yourself. “She’s everything. My emergency contact, my medical proxy… Hell, if I died tomorrow, everything I own goes to her. She’s my family. If I lose her, I have no-one.”

Derek lets a beat pass, watching you, and you can tell he knows something you don’t, because he said, “You have people. Even if you can’t see them.” You frowned a little as he went back to his file, clearly unwilling to say more, and you’ve never been one to push into personal space. Instead, you go back to your room, left with his cryptic words.

[spaghettixdemon]

J Stands for more words than one PT.3

DISCLAIMER You are responsible for the content you consume. Make sure to read all necessary warnings. Minors do not interact. Please remember this is a work of fiction; if you don’t like it, don’t read it.

Warnings: Drinking/Drunkenness, P in V, getting freaky in a car, fighting, slight mentions of death, Jealousy??

Pairing: Spencer Reid x F! Reader

Word Count: 748

Little author message here- Finally out!! AHH This took way longer than I thought it would so sorry about that 💔 BTW envision whatever kind of outfit you like, but I gave some inspo of what I think Y/N would wear at the bottom of the post <3 Enjoy!

part 1 here | part 2 here | part 2.5 here

—————————————————————————————————

It was late into the night when Spencer unlocked the door to his apartment. Spencer looked around with a smile, hearing humming and music coming from their bedroom. “..Y/N?” Spencer dropped his messenger bag on the couch next to him and started to loosen his tie. As he made his way over to the bedroom, he could see the door was open and Y/N was applying makeup. Spencer crossed his arms and leaned against the door frame, an endearing look on his face. “Getting ready?” Y/N jumped slightly and looked up to see her boyfriend in the door frame. “Oh! Spencer, if I knew you were heading  home I would have cleaned up a bit!” The desk she was doing her makeup on was littered with eyeshadow pallets, mascara bottles, mismatched fake eyelashes, and more. Spencer did have a thing for germs, but he made the mental note to clean up the desk after Y/N went out for the night. So, he shrugged it off and walked into the bedroom. “You’re fine, don't worry..” He was cut off as Y/N stood up to listen to him and was almost immediately distracted. Y/Ns’ dress stopped at her thighs…it showed off her curves and cleavage in all the best ways. Y/N gestured to herself looking up at Spencer. “Is it ugly? I found it the other day while I was out picking up dinner.” Spencer continued to stare at her figure and his head slowly shook. “No…no babe…you are so…” Spencer just smiled and looked back up at her. “You look so nice- I’m sure the girls will love it too” He moved over to Y/N giving her a quick kiss before sitting down on their bed. “Just wear that more often please- especially for our date next Monday, alright?” Spencer could not get that dress out of his mind, and all Y/N could do was laugh and blush. “Wow ok..noted..” She sat back down and started applying lipstick. 

—————————————————————————————————

After some time, all Y/N had left to do was put on some heels and get the meeting address from Spencer. Spencer, who had been admiring the sight of his girlfriend this whole time, stood up, grabbed Y/Ns’ shoes from their closet, and kneeled in front of her. He looked up at her, wiping some loose curls out of his face. “Can I help?” he spoke, watching Y/N and how happy she looked as she nodded her head, giving him the ‘go-ahead’. Spencer gently held onto Y/N’s calve as he slipped on the heel, pulling it up to her ankle. As he did so, he leaned in and kissed her tibialis anterior (front of the calf) gently. Her smooth skin against his lips made Y/N blush as she watched the man in front of her. As Spencer finished working, he moved onto her other heel, He started kissing her other leg. He didn’t want to embarrass her and leave giant bruises, he just wanted to have her feeling good. He slowly worked his way up her leg, his fingertips gently caressing her legs and thighs. He kissed her tibialis anterior, her knee, her outer thigh, and her inner thigh. Spencer gently spread her legs, exposing her underwear. He was just a few inches away from her core but stood up reluctantly. “I don’t want you to be late..” He spoke half-heartedly. Y/N just watched the entire time, face a deep shade of red. She had butterflies in her stomach and let out a sigh she had been holding in. “O-Oh…yeah of course...” Spencer stood up, causing Y/N to look up, following his eyes. He hummed and leaned in, kissing her deeply for a moment before he pulled away.

—————————————————————————————————

“Let me give you Garcia’s number for later” Y/N was still somewhat surprised by what Spencer had done, but shook it off to stand up and pass her phone to Spencer. As he shared her contact information, Y/N looked Spencer over. Hair was in his face once again and his jawline was still somehow as sharp as ever, even while looking down at a phone. “oookay! Done!” He smiled and looked over to Y/N, seeing just how enamored she was with him. Y/N  grabbed her phone out of his hand, kissing him quickly on the cheek… then the neck… and finally his collar bone. She took a step back, looking in the mirror, and doing a 360. “Thank you Spence, I can’t wait to meet your friends.” She looked over at him, taking a few steps closer to hug him, heading out the door to catch a taxi.

—————————————————————————————————

taglist: @libraprincessfairy @esposadomd @teenwolfbitches28

[supercriminalbean]

What if the BAU own a restaurant:

Garcia: she's the host/receptionist. She the friendly face the customers first see as they walk in.

Derek: he's the bartender, making string drink, flirting with the customers.

Spencer: kitchen hand/waiter. He always helps prepare the food but when it gets busy you'll see him on the floor helping out.

Emily: she's the sous chef, always out the back always with a knife in the hand

Hotchner: manager. He's the cool manager always has his teams back with shitty customers.

JJ: waitress, she the smiley and happy waitress you get as you enjoy the food and drinks.

Rossi: now you know rossi is the owner and head chef. And he always made sure his coworkers are feed before they leave. Also no one messed with his recipes.

[shutupandwatchsmosh]

bau as text posts 1/?

[temporarywelcome]

My SHAYLAAAAA

(Writing another part rn)

Smooth Criminal - Spencer Reid

Word Count: 1.8k

Summary: Spencer has been extremely secretive about his girlfriend of the past year, so much so that even Garcia can't find information on her. Till today, and her.... interesting ...past leaves everyone flabbergasted.

Warnings: light swearing

-----------------------------

Spencer’s had a girlfriend.

In fact, he’s had a girlfriend for almost a year at this point and she has not met his friends even once. He was so secretive with this girlfriend that the rest of the BAU couldn’t get any information about her. Not even a name, leaving Garcia in anguish. 

Everyone was dying to know about this mystery girl that has taken up most of the boy genius’ free time. 

And finally, Garcia cracked the code. 

As the team walked down the halls of work towards the exit, all exhausted and ready to go home, Morgan asked if Spencer had needed a ride.

“It’s pretty late to take a taxi,” Morgan had said. Everyone knows Reid barely drives for whatever reason. He frequently took taxis or carpooled.

Reid just shook his head, “It’s fine, thank you.” 

And that was that.

However, Garcia didn’t remember seeing him flag down a taxi. She didn’t remember seeing him walk off into the night.

And so she found herself in front of her computer typing away, already having a feeling as to how Reid left the office. She could get in trouble for this…

If she got caught.

But she won’t, because she’s Penelope Garcia,the most amazing tech analyst to grace the Earth. 

And there it was. 

She watched the camera footage of the parking garage, following Spencer’s movements of the night before, camera to camera. She followed him, until he stopped next to a car, opening the passenger side and getting in.

Then the car drove off.

Someone drove into the parking lot with the intention of picking up Spencer. And she was pretty sure she knew who. Especially because this didn’t seem like a random occurrence. Going back a few weeks (she really needed a hobby it seemed), she found this car would pick Spencer up quite frequently. 

So she tracked the license plate, finally finding the name of this mystery woman. Y/N L/N. And that’s when Garcia fell down the rabbit hole…

That same day, Morgan stood in front of Spencer’s desk, arms crossed with an annoying smirk on his face. He obviously had something to say. 

“Morgan, I feel you hovering,” Spencer muttered, closing the manila folder on his desk and looking up at his colleague. “What is it?”

“So… what are you doing after work? Wanna get some beers?”

“No thanks, I have plans already.”

“Oh, yeah? With who?” 

“With-” Spencer’s eyes narrowed at Morgan in suspicion, “Why are you asking?”

“Answering a question with a question, huh?” Morgan chuckled, “C’mon, Reid, are you going to be with your little girlfriend?” 

“She’s quite tall actually,” 

“You know what I mean,” he turned to walk away, “Have fun with Y/N, pretty boy,” 

“What the f-” Reid gasped as Morgan stalked off, “How do you know her name?!” 

Morgan ignored his question, Rossi coming at him next to bother him. 

Straight from Garcia’s computer-adorned office. 

“A criminal, Reid?” Rossi exclaimed, slapping a file down onto his desk.

“Garcia told you?!” Spencer groaned, head going into his hands. “I can’t have any privacy?”

“Hey, look at me!” Rossi was completely appalled by the information he had found, “You’re an FBI agent! Dating a criminal!”

“Weren’t you a mobster or are we just going to forget that…?” JJ grumbled from her own desk, averting her gaze when Rossi shot her a look. 

Spencer dropped his hands from his face, “Rossi, look-”

“I bet that’s why you’ve been so secretive,” Dave concluded, “Because you knew Garcia would find out about your felon girlfriend. Look, she even gave me printouts,” He gestured to the file he threw onto Spencer’s desk. 

“She did petty crimes,” Spencer scoffed in defense of his girlfriend. 

“She robbed people for sport. Her mother was wealthy. Her father was a cop.” 

“Daughter of a cop, girlfriend of an FBI agent, and a robber? Interesting,” Prentiss joined the interrogation. 

“Where did you come from…” Spencer sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose, “She didn’t do it for sport. She just… well…”

“She’s a diagnosed kleptomaniac,” Rossi opened the file and pulled out a document of proof, “Now how the hell did you manage to date a kleptomaniac?”

Spencer opened his mouth to answer, but Prentiss answered for him, “They knew each other in high school back in Vegas,” she said, looking through the folder for the information Garcia told her. 

“Yes,” Spencer grumbled, “She was a freshman when I was a senior.”

“When you were twelve?” Rossi deadpanned. 

“Yes,” he repeated, “She actually helped me a lot with bullies.” he cleared his throat awkwardly, “She stole a lot of their things…” 

“And you find that attractive?” Rossi asked. 

“No, I didn’t find anything attractive when I was twelve,” Spencer shot back, “I only knew her for that one year before I graduated and left. We reconnected last year and-”

“Ah, yes, two years after she had to be bailed out of jail for stealing from a gas station.” said Rossi, “Not even a good crime,”

“What would constitute for a good crime?” Prentiss wondered out loud.

“A bank or something.” Rossi replied, “Anyway-”

“I mean she did rob a bank before-” Spencer paused, then clamped his mouth shut. 

Rossi and Prentiss exchanged glances, before making eye contact with JJ as well, who was now interested in the conversation. 

“She what” it didn’t even sound like a question coming out of Rossi’s mouth. 

Spencer quickly went to his girlfriend’s defense, “Not at gunpoint or anything! She just, uh, worked at the bank.”

“Jesus Christ,” Prentiss whistled, “Now this is intriguing,”

“I do not wish to speak about my girlfriend’s crimes anymore,” 

“Well we do,” Rossi grumbled, “So I’m assuming she hasn’t committed any more crimes?”

Spencer’s silence made Dave and Emily’s eyes widen. 

“You’re dating a current criminal-?” Emily began.

“Okay, look,” At this point, Spencer just wanted to leave and see his girlfriend, “Due to suffering from her kleptomania, her desire to steal is uncontrollable. Even when we met, she would constantly steal but return the object without the person knowing. I’ll admit, some of the robberies I’ve been… informed about, seem like they were more for fun, but that’s in the past, yeah?” 

“Yeah…” Emily wasn’t sure she should be convinced. 

“Yeah. Okay, I’m leaving now.” Spencer stood up, eyeing the file in Rossi’s hand, “And can you please get rid of that?”

“Well, can we meet her?” JJ asked from her desk, standing as well, “I didn’t stalk her like everyone else, but I’m still intrigued.”

“Thank you for being normal, JJ,” Spencer sighed, grabbing his bag.

Garcia burst out of her office, a devious look on her face, “Just looked at the cameras… A certain car is here waiting for Reid.” 

Spencer muttered under his breath as he sped off, already hearing footsteps following. He could hear Garcia tell Y/N’s whole life story to the group of Rossi, Prentiss, JJ, and Morgan who rejoined the group. 

“She’s a dancer in a big theatre a few cities over,” Garcia babbled, “They just finished Swan Lake. She Odette and everything! Oh and…”

Jesus Christ. 

“...and the last thing I found was that she used to run a Girls’ Generation blog,” Garcia finished.

“What’s that?” Morgan asked. 

“Girl group. She really likes Jessica, but she left or got kicked out or something. I learned so much girl group lore today.” 

“I also like Jessica’s sister, Krystal. She’s in a different group though,”

The team all froze, heads snapping comically at the same time to the owner of the voice. Y/N, the kleptomaniac that has somehow stolen Spencer Reid’s heart. She was leaning against her fancy car (Rossi pondered if it were stolen). 

“I had a blog for that group too,” she added, grinning at Garcia. She held out her arms, Reid shyly shuffling into her embrace. “But, well, I’d like to not remember either blog,” she whispered a ‘hey baby’ to Spencer, who mumbled something back, clearly embarrassed. 

“Um,” he cleared his throat, “Y/N, this is my team. Well, most of the team. Hotch isn’t here, thank God,” 

Y/N laughed, “They’ve been bothering you, baby? I’m guessing Penelope was the one who found out about me…” she scanned the small group and gestured towards Garcia, “You,” faced the others, “You’re Derek Morgan… Jennifer J… I’m not gonna lie, I can’t pronounce your last name-” JJ raised a brow. “-Emily Prentiss, and David Rossi.” she pointed out each agent before eyeing Garcia again, “You’re not the only stalker.” 

“Can we go now?” Spencer muttered, face already red, “I’m tired,” 

“Yeah, of course,” Y/N nodded. She looked at the team again, “It seems I’ve become a chauffeur, as this princess does not like to drive.” 

“Yeah, I’m gone,” Spencer grumbled, getting into the passenger seat.

“Oh, he so hates us now,” Morgan chuckled. 

Y/N shook her head, “Nah, he loves you guys. Well, as you all know, I’m Y/N,” She held out a hand to shake, politely shaking each member’s hand. “Should get going before said princess gets cranky,” She turned, heading back to the driver’s seat. “Oh yeah, Dave?” she looked over her shoulder and tossed a pair of keys at Rossi, who caught them.

His keys.

“Sorry,” she got into the car and drove off. 

“Kleptomaniac,” he said in awe, “She’s fast.”

“Didn’t even notice,” Emily agreed, watching the car as it created distance. 

“I don’t know how I feel about her,” JJ muttered, biting her lip, “I mean, is my name really that hard to pronounce?”

“Not at all,” said Garcia, “Spell, maybe,” 

_________________________

Once Y/N got back into the car, she noticed Spencer had turned off the music she had playing. “Um, Jessica was speaking,” she said jokingly.

He glanced at her, “Tell Jessica I apologize,” he said dryly. She was sure his team thought he was such a sweetheart, but damn, he gets cranky. Perhaps he saves that specially for her. 

“I’m guessing they saw my… record?”

“Mhm, Garcia made printouts,” 

“Ah, so they know about the bank incident…”

“One of them.”

“It won’t take long for them to find out about the other incidents,” she laughed. 

Spencer groaned, “I’m never going to hear the end of it… Now why did I decide dating a kleptomaniac was okay?”

Y/N just grinned, “Cuz I’m a smooth criminal, huh?” 

“Corny,” he grumbled, but the corners of his lips curled up. 

“Annie are you okay… are you okay…” Y/N trailed off, not knowing the lyrics. 

Spencer giggled like a kid; only she made him feel that way, “I don’t think Michael Jackson would appreciate that cover,”

“I don’t think Jessica would appreciate being silenced,” Y/N reached out, raising the volume of the music a tiny bit.

“Must we always speak of this woman as if we know her personally?” 

“Yes,”

--------

check out my pinned post for requests :)

[theunholyvirginemilyprentiss]

BAU, Brown-eyed Asskickers’ Unit

Just realized that every single agent that’s ever been part of the BAU accept JJ (and Ashley) have brown eyes, how CUTE is that? Emily, Morgan, Luke, Elle, Penelope, Hotch (green-brown mix), Spencer (hazel), Jason, Rossi, Tara, all have brown eyes!

Even people who were here for like one season, Alex Blake, Jordan Todd, Kate Callahan, Tyler Green, Matt Simmons, Stephen Walker, all have brown eyes, like every single one.

They’re a little brown-eyed squad with their blue eyed princess JJ and hazel-eyed kings Hotch and Spencer, I’m gonna SOB 😭

Reblog this with BAU eye pics, they’re all so gorgeous

[jaymyie]

Foyet, to the team: If you ever feel stupid or weak or powerless, just remember that I am not. I am out there, very dangerous, and I am looking for you. Good luck.

[mulderiloveyou]

So… is there any lighthearted episode in criminal minds?

some of these episodes are brutal…!

i need some silliness? maybe 1 episode where everyone is goofy? or when we can see their social, domestic side?

thanks for your kindness !

[vigilante-3073]

LOML

Emily Prentiss x Female Reader

Summary: The story of how Y/N L/N fell in love with Emily Prentiss.

TW: Flirting, pining, WLW, Y/N is smitten, betting, proposal/engagement.

When Y/N saw Emily Prentiss on her first day at the BAU, it was love at first sight. Y/N had never seen a more beautiful woman and she was completely gobsmacked.

Emily had kind of appeared out of nowhere, catching Hotch and Gideon by surprise. Y/N made her way into the bullpen as she chatted with Reid, coffees in hand from their favorite cafe.

Spencer looked over at his friend when she suddenly fell silent, her gaze set on the young woman who arranged her items on a new desk beside Y/N's.

"Wow," Y/N mumbled softly, watching the woman smile as she thanked the facilities management worker for putting together her chair.

"Wonder who that is?" Spencer questioned.

"No idea, but I want to find out," Y/N said.

"She's obviously joining the team, don't you think that might not be the best idea," Spencer advised.

"Or maybe she's my ridiculously hot soulmate and we just haven't met yet," Y/N proposed.

"Yeah, I'm sure that's exactly who she is," Spencer smiled, shaking his head and taking a sip of his coffee.

"Come on, we're going to introduce ourselves," Y/N said, already making her way over to the woman. Spencer followed after her, lingering awkwardly behind her as Y/N approached the new agent.

"Hi, you must be new, I'm Y/N L/N," She said.

The woman smiled, "It's nice to meet you, I'm Emily Prentiss," She said, holding out her hand.

Y/N shook her hand, gaze flickering down quickly to check for a wedding ring before returning to Emily's face. She obviously noticed the glance, but chose not to comment on it.

"Oh, this is my partner. He doesn't shake hands, but he's happy to be here," Y/N said, releasing Emily's hand.

"Hi, I'm Doctor Spencer Reid," He greeted, offering a small wave.

"Nice to meet you both. I'm really excited to be a part of this team and I look forward to working with everyone," Emily said.

"It's a really good team. I'm sure you'll fit right in," Y/N said.

Emily nodded, "Thank you for saying that. I just want to do a good job and this opportunity means everything," Emily said.

"Has anyone given you the tour?" Y/N asked.

"Not quite yet," Emily replied.

"I have some free time now if you're interested," Y/N offered.

"That would be great," Emily smiled.

"Oh, I thought we were gonna-," Spencer started, falling silent when Y/N shot him a pleading look.

"You know what, nevermind. Have fun," Spencer said.

Y/N walked around the building with Emily, showing her where everything was located before they eventually returned to the bullpen.

JJ was leaning back on the edge of Spencer's desk, chatting with him while he fidgeted with his pencil. JJ looked up, a stack of case files held close to her chest, "Hey, you must be Emily. Spencer told me that you'd be joining the team, I'm Jennifer but everyone calls me JJ," She said, standing from the desk and offering her hand to Emily.

She shook her hand, "Nice to meet you, JJ... You're the media liason, right?" Emily asked.

"Yeah, that would be me," JJ nodded, releasing her hand and holding onto her files.

"Y/N tells me that you're one of the reasons this place is still standing," Emily said.

JJ huffed a laugh, "I wouldn't go that far, but I'm definitely here to help," She said.

Hotch walked passed them, making his way towards his office, "Actually, I have to run but it was great meeting you, Emily," JJ said, quickly following after Hotch.

"We have a case?" Y/N asked, Spencer nodded.

"Briefing in twenty minutes," He said.

"Perfect timing," Y/N stated.

...

Emily had been a member of the BAU for just over a year and Y/N fell more in love with her every day. Y/N knew that Spencer was right, workplace romances were incredibly messy and she could settle for pining in secret.

Or more accurately, pining about Emily to her best friend.

Spencer had to commend her, Y/N was madly in love with Emily but kept it hidden for the sake of the team. Everything the woman did made Y/N swoon and Spencer was beginning to have a hard time keeping her feet on the ground.

It also didn't help that Emily also seemed to have feelings for Y/N in return. They talked every day, dancing around their feelings as they both tried not to cross the line. Their connection seemed to be obvious to everyone except the two of them.

It was honestly a little pathetic to see two highly trained FBI Profilers ignore the behaviors they exhibited, pretending that nothing was going on.

Morgan had even started a betting pool two months after Emily started. Bets were placed on who would make the first move and how long it would take them to admit their feelings.

Spencer dealt out the cards on the table between him and Y/N. He picked up his cards, arranging them in his hand before he looked up at his friend. Spencer let out a small sigh when he realized that Y/N was staring fondly at something across the jet.

He turned in his seat, following her gaze to find Emily working on a case file. Her eyes were downcast as she scribbled notes onto the margins of her case file.

Y/N looked away as soon as the dark-haired woman lifted her head, offering a lingering look of her own. Spencer turned back towards Y/N, "Alright, I give up," He admitted.

"What are you talking about?" Y/N asked.

"Just ask her out," Spencer said.

Y/N shook her head, gathering her cards and adjusting them in her hand, "You know I can't," She said softly.

"Do you think being with her would make you happy?" Spencer questioned.

"It's not just about happiness, Spencer. What if we got together and had a messy break up?" Y/N replied, a point that Spencer had made almost a year ago.

"And what if you don't? What if you spent all this time pining after her when you could have been the happiest you could ever hope to be?" He asked.

"It's unlikely," Y/N replied.

"Is it? Because I have never seen you act like this... Hell, I've never seen anyone look at someone else the way that you look at her. You love her, Y/N," Spencer said.

Y/N glanced over at Emily, meeting her gaze and receiving a soft smile and a small wave. Y/N smiled back, feeling her heart race in her chest and butterflies flutter around in her stomach.

Y/N returned her gaze to Spencer, "I'll think about it," She replied softly, setting a card on the pile.

The rest of the plane ride went by quickly and everyone returned to the office to complete their paperwork. They worked quietly with sparse chatter about their plans for the evening.

Spencer could see Emily glancing over at Y/N, pausing her work as if she was deep in thought before reluctantly returning to her paperwork. Rossi turned in his report, bidding the team a quick goodnight before rushing out of the office. Hotch would likely stay in his office for most of the night and JJ would spend a few hours looking through case files before calling it a night.

An awkward tension had settled in the bullpen as Spencer completed his report, sitting stiffly at his desk as he pretended to add more notes. Morgan lingered at his desk as well, watching Emily and Y/N out of the corner of his eye.

Someone needed to do something soon.

The lasting game of chicken was beginning to become unbearable until Y/N stood from her desk. The remaining team members watched her walk up to Hotch's office and turn in her paperwork.

It almost felt like the tension had reached its peak, no one was willing to move a muscle as Y/N returned to her seat and began to pack up her things. Emily took a breath, setting down her pen and pushing her chair back before standing up.

Spencer looked over at Morgan, any attempts to be discreet now forgotten as Emily approached Y/N.

"Hey, Y/N," Emily said softly.

Y/N looked up at her, "Is everything okay?" She asked.

"I wanted to ask if you'd go out for dinner with me tonight... Just the two of us," Emily said, fidgeting with her fingers.

"Yeah, that would be great," She nodded, "Do you need me to wait for you to finish your report?" Y/N questioned.

Emily shifted on her feet, "Actually, I should be more clear. I'm asking you out... On a date," Emily said slowly.

Y/N paused, looking up at her, "You're asking me out?" She asked.

"I am," Emily replied hesitantly.

"Okay," Y/N said, her heart beginning to race in her chest.

"Okay?" Emily repeated.

Y/N smiled, "I'd love to go on a date with you, Emily Prentiss," She said.

"Good. Um, I'll go turn this in and we can go," Emily said, unable to keep the smile off her face.

"Okay," Y/N nodded, her own smile widening.

Emily gathered her paperwork before rushing up to Hotch's office. Morgan huffed, pulling his wallet out and counting out a stack of bills before setting them in Spencer's outstretched palm.

"You hustled me and I don't know how you managed it, but I'm gonna figure it out," Morgan said, pointing a finger at the young genius as he counted the bills happily.

"You keep telling yourself that, Morgan," Spencer replied.

"You bet on us?" Y/N asked.

"Everyone did. The pool has been going since a few months after she started," Morgan said, tilting his head in the direction of Hotch's office. He stood from his chair and began to pack up, "An extra hour of sitting here just to lose all my money," He muttered, shaking his head.

Emily made her down the stairs and returned to her desk, "What's going on?" She asked.

"They bet on us," Y/N said.

"How much?" Emily asked.

"Five hundred that you'd be the one to admit it first. Three hundred that it'd be a year and a half before either of you caved," Morgan said, walking up to Hotch's office with his report.

"Glad our relationship has made a profit for you, Reid," Emily teased, pulling on her coat.

"Have fun on your date," He smiled.

"We will," Y/N nodded.

...

Y/N and Emily had been together for exactly four years to the day and they could never imagine being with anyone else. Hotch had given the team one of their incredibly rare days off and the couple were going out to celebrate their anniversary.

Emily had made a reservation for them at the same restaurant where they had their first date. They shared a bottle of champagne and ate their favorite meals before splitting an amazing dessert.

Emily and Y/N walked down the road, following the same path through the nearby public park as they had years prior. They shared their first kiss after that date in this very park.

Emily took Y/N's hand in hers, smiling at her when she looked over, "I can't believe it's been four years," Emily stated.

"You can't be sick of me already, Em," Y/N teased.

"I could never be sick of you," Emily replied easily, watching Y/N's cheeks flush as she smiled.

They made their way around a bend that led to the spot where Emily had kissed the love of her life for the first time. Y/N slowed to a stop when she noticed the fairy lights strung up in the tree branches. Small candles were set up along the path with rose petals scattered on the ground.

Emily continued to walk, gently pulling Y/N along with her. As they got closer, Y/N noticed a bouquet of roses and a bunch of framed photos from their relationship on the park bench where they had sat after their first date.

"Emily, it's beautiful," Y/N smiled, Emily nodded.

"I have something very important to ask you," Emily said, her hand slipping into her coat pocket. Emily slowly lowered herself down onto one knee, pulling a small velvet box from her pocket and opening it.

"Y/N, you are my soulmate. I have never felt a love like the one I have for you. You are extraordinary and I can't imagine going another day without you by my side... Will you marry me?" Emily asked shakily, tears gathering in her eyes.

Y/N stared down at her with glossy eyes, "Emily," She mumbled, slipping a hand into her pocket.

Y/N pulled out a velvet box of her own, opening it up and holding it out, "I was gonna ask you the exact same question," She said.

Emily smiled, unable to keep herself from letting out a teary laugh as she stood up. Emily cupped her cheek and kissed her, her other hand settling on Y/N's waist and pulling her closer.

Emily pulled away, "That was even better than a yes," She smiled.

Y/N nodded, "You always beat me to the punch, Em. That's why I love you so much," Y/N said, wiping the happy tears from her cheeks.

Emily plucked her ring from the box, sliding it onto Y/N's finger before she repeated the gesture.

"Well, I guess my proposal is a bit thrown off now. But I do have the team waiting for us at a bar down the street," Y/N said.

"The one with the beautiful garden in the back?" Emily asked, Y/N nodded.

"You're not gonna believe this, but I actually tried to book that room before I decided to do this," Emily said.

"Great minds think alike," Y/N smiled.

"They definitely do," Emily nodded.

"Who helped you set everything up?" Y/N asked.

"JJ, you?" Emily asked.

"Reid," Y/N stated.

"I wonder how much money Morgan is going to lose when we show up already engaged," Emily said.

"Well, I wonder how much money Spencer is going to win for knowing it was a double proposal and not telling Morgan," Y/N said.

"That is a very good question," Emily smiled, wrapping her arm around Y/N's waist as they walked down the path in the direction of the bar.

[bardicinspired]

Penelope Garcia would run a very successful Tumblr blog

[caveiratimida]

So I am planning out this idea it seems. It isn't Rigor Samsa but the actual beginning of Reader becoming closer with the rest of the BAU team. I was brainstorming the fic and -

[threezoz]

same

[pillowprincess4logan]

the team is chasing the sickest murderers to ever live meanwhile these two on the phone sexually harassing each other