#PARENTING

[bitchesgetriches]

As a teenager, life gave me lemons.

I ate the lemons—skins, seeds, and stickers.

Many years later, I wrote a guide to help others eat lemons.

This is a guide to leaving home before 18. It ranks among the most important and most personal things I've ever written. It's also one of our most popular guides of all time. So I updated and expanded it. To make it as accessible as possible, we recorded audio and video versions too. My lemon-flavored heart would swell with joy and citric acid to know it reached people who need it.

But it's a fight share it. Heavy topics like this get muted and buried on most social platforms. Even worse, this administration is deleting surveys and data about it; my .gov sources transmogrified into 404s before my very eyes. Gonna post this, and pray that Tumblr does what Tumblr does best.

How To Leave Home Before 18

Video Version 🍋 Audio Version 🍋 Text Version

[thedaddycomplex]

My son’s metalcore band played a punk festival tonight, so my regular attire finally matched the occasion.

[artthatgivesmefeelings]

Giuseppe Sciuti (Italian, 1834-1911) Le gioie della buona mamma, 1877

[pasiphile]

The funny thing about kids media taking their villain and making them less evil (because it's for kids, so you can't exactly make them murder and maim can you) is that you end up with the good guys going stay away from X, they're a horrible villain because they look scary and horrible and they occasionally bother us a bit!

Which just makes your heroes suddenly feel uncomfortably racist.

[imheretoreadafic]

I believe in Bruce reading hundreds of parenting articles and books when he adopted Dick.

[thepersonalwords]

No one said parenting was easy,but NO good parent has any right to give up.It is one labyrinth you can never quit because it seems too hard.

Gillian Duce

[asteroidtroglodyte]

They’re not stupid

They’re just new

I see a lot of posts saying "teach boys about consent".

While that is true, a lot of parents will do that and fail to see how their own actions are the problem.

If you've spanked him, he's less likely to understand consent.

If you've forced him to sit on Santa's lap, he's less likely to understand consent.

If you've forced him to give hugs and kisses to family members, he's less likely to understand consent.

If you've grabbed him in order to force him to sit still, he's less likely to understand consent.

If you've labeled him as "too sensitive" for not wanting to be touched, he's less likely to understand consent.

If you've assumed he's okay with something because he technically allowed it even though he felt pressured, he's less likely to understand consent.

If you're only going to criticize his actions but not your own, it won't work.

[introvertedx10]

[jenthebug]

The Big City safety net just emailed Jay. They’re pausing gender affirming care for people under 19.

They have to stop because they receive so much federal funding. Getting their funding pulled would wreck them (and probably me, since I’m on their payroll).

Next up is Planned Parenthood, which receives 40% federal funding. I am cautiously optimistic.

Someone please just give my kid testosterone?

🥺👉👈

[tastefullyoffensive]

30 Hilarious Tweets From Parents Just Barely Holding It Together (February 11, 2025)

[kriimuline-blog]

Really, this is how parenting should work.

I am exceptionally lucky in that my parents never hit me, grounded me, confiscated my things, banned me from my hobbies or threatened any of these actions to make me behave as a kid. as an adult it has made me realise how very very long a road most people have to traverse before they can take a statement like 'no rule that must be enforced by threat is legitimate' seriously.

[tookishcombeferre]

Sofia the First: A Lesson in Visual Literature

This is the most Parent-TM thing I will likely ever write. So, if this doesn't interest you, I'm sorry. But, it's something I actually deeply appreciate about the construction of Sofia the First's writing as someone with a small child.

Sofia the First is actually structured a little bit like an old school epic.

We have a protagonist who goes on a true hero's journey.

From the opening pilot to the finale we open and close in the village house in which Sofia lived. We get explicit commentary on how much she has changed over time. She has, physically, aged. She has gone on literal adventures to different realms and places. Interacted with (almost) god like beings. And, in the finale, even descends and ascends, into an "underworld" of sorts. It's, in every sense of the word, a hero's journey.

The finale especially is set up to highlight the hero's journey arc. The song at the beginning of the episode recaps Sofia's call to adventure, her mentors who each have their own solos (Baileywick, Mom, Dad, and Cedric), as well as the number of times she has had to "cross the threshold" between her world and the Mystic Isles. We see Chrysta (her helper) recapped and highlighted. We see Sofia using the skills she has learned in the Mystic Isles to stop Prisma. Despite the fact that this ultimately fails, and Vor is unleashed.

The rest of the finale is dealing with the failure that ultimately leads to the "death" that is Sofia being placed in the Amulet. While inside the Amulet, she has the "revelation" that her love is her power which allows her to defeat Vor. The "change" and "atonement" pieces are a little dicier - but - the people around her do that/ have done that, and those changes and atonments are what set her free in the end. The changes that Sofia herself helped to cause, the atonements she helped to bring about, are what allow her to be set free.

The gift she received in the end, is her Amulet back and, as is quite traditional, it is presented by her mentor. She, and those who have participated in her adventure, are returned changed. She is made a full Protector. (I'm not sure how I feel about this personally given her age, but for the sake of Sofia's story as an epic? I'm all about it.)

And, the story ends.

Each episode leading the the finale also helps to move the narrative towards that ending. It's pushing us towards that final arc of "Death and Rebirth" to the ending of the narrative.

Which, for a show geared towards 2-5 year olds?

Absolutely INCREDIBLE.

Personal issues that I have with how old Sofia is to be doing certain things aside, it's amazing that they make the hero's journey archetype accessible to toddlers. Like, I could actually explain this archetype to my kid in the next year and a half and be confident they understand "The Hero's Journey" if I simplify the language just a smidge.

Again. Amazing.

Outside of that, the show also tackles things like dramatic irony.

Throughout the show, we often know the villain's schemes well before our protagonists do. (We know Cedric's plans the whole show. We know about Ms. Nettle's plot as Sascha. Etc.) And, it's SO well thought out to be able to ask a kid even as young as three "When you know something another character doesn't, how does it make you feel?" "Why does it make you feel that way?"

Dramatic irony builds suspense. That's what it's designed to do. You want the kid yelling "Don't trust that! It's not going to work! OH NO!" Because, that's what dramatic irony does.

The next layer is when they ask "Why are people nice sometimes and not nice sometimes?"

Because THAT'S where the real talk happens.

Dramatic irony builds the opportunity for social emotional learning to take place. It builds the opportunity to recognize the difference between when characters like Cedric, Ms. Nettle, Ivy, and others are acting in ways that are self-serving vs. self-giving and how that makes them and others feel.

Right now, Squish and I are stuck just on how people feel.

"Sofia is sad. She's crying."

"Why do think that's happening?"

*Crickets*

The question is there even if we can't get an answer yet.

Additionally, all the way back in the pilot we have foreshadowing about the Amulet of Avalor being chosen for Sofia by fate. This eventually leading to Elena's plot to have Sofia help her get free.

Not, going to say too much more about that because that's just true. I love foreshadowing as a plot device, and I'm happy to see it used continually throughout the series.

The episode "Through the Looking Back Glass" is an EXCELLENT way to introduce the concept of flashback. It sets up a magic item that gives easy access to flashbacks without making them annoying and overly heavy handed in exposition.

I also really like the subtlety of the one in "In Cedric we Trust" where we see the illusion of a young Roland and Cedric playing as Cedric is singing. Very subtle. Very nice.

Both are well placed. Very emotive. And, flashback, when done well, should add emotion and emotional context.

Can't wait until Squish is a little older so we can discuss that more because that is a little more advanced that even the dramatic irony.

Finally, we have symbolism.

The Amulet of Avalor, the Family Wand, even certain colors throughout the show seem to carry weight.

The Amulet of Avalor, of course, seems to be the most obvious symbol. It represents kindness, goodness, and love, amongst other virtues. Even after Elena is no longer granting blessings and curses, it still seems to carry the same weight to protection and blessing with it. It holds onto its nature of being a symbol of virtue by being what leads Sofia to becoming a protector of those who need her through her kindness and goodness. It's her wit, her strength, her devotion, and her pure-heartedness that see her through the trials she's placed in, and all of that comes with her association with Amulet.

Now, obviously these are not the words you'd use with a 2-5 year old kid.

However, what I love about all of this, is that it is WRITTEN in a way that can be approached AT 2-5 year old level. There are layers here.

When speaking about the Amulet, you can talk about the way the Amulet itself shows (or leads to) goodness.

When talking about flashback, you can talk about why it's important that we know about the past to understand the characters in the "now." "Do we feel more sad for them?" "Does it help us understand why they did what they did?" "Why do you think that is?"

All of these concepts are SO important to be written at this level because it allows these youngsters to grow into reading and analyzing much more complex media with better literacy skills for being exposed to things that are written in really explicit and obvious ways.

If you read this, thank you.

I'm a parent. I'm a former English major. I also just really want to see people be media literate. I REALLY, REALLY think more shows need to be written for the 2-5 age group in this structure BECAUSE it exposes them to these literary devices even if they aren't explicitly defined.

[mostly-funnytwittertweets]

[animentality]

[hauntednachotimemachine]

One of the things that my mom always said to me and my brother growing up was “You don’t belong to me. God gave you to me on loan.”

Ignore the God bit if you don’t hold to that (I don’t), because it isn’t the point — the point here is she viewed us kids as our own people, and considered it her responsibility to deliver us safely to our own adulthood in order to build our own lives. And she made a point to let us know it. She wanted us to be our own people.

It wasn’t until I was well into my adulthood that I became acquainted with how goddamn RARE that is. So I appreciate her giving me freedom, and giving me that template to work from with my own kid.

It is so fucking sinister that the only form of child abuse that society really cares about is sexual in nature. parents are free to control everything about their child's movement, presentation, eating, faith traditions, information exposure, socialization, and can restrict all of these things to an extreme degree as a form of punishment or in order to shape the child into whatever they want that child to be. and that's all considered completely normal, the parent's right! people don't even see the fact that a parent has the power to control so much about a child's life for damn near 20 years to be a problem. The only time they become concerned about child abuse is when the prospect of an outside stranger behaving in a sexual way toward a child is raised. and yeah a lot of really horrific sexual abuses are enacted unto children, but that's because they have zero control over their own lives and bodies in any other way as well. It is all about power and control. and typically the ones who are abusing children the most frequently are the ones who have the most control over them, the parents.