#Outside problems
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I will come back for him
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Did somebody say Bill shouldn't be allowed to swear? I think somebody said Bill shouldn't be allowed to swear. Thanks to that, have these retooled The Good Place jokes:
The "powers that be" can refer to either the Theraprism staff, the Axolotl, or just. Ya know. Disney in general. Or all three! Whichever you think is funniest. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
The "party" Bill's referring to is Weirdmageddon, of course. He was quite the ashhole to everyone back then.
Ford has probably gotten pretty good at the 'tune out your psychopathic ex with dank memes' challenge.
It must be very cathartic to be able to make Bill shut up whenever you want with just the press of a button. I'm sure Ford doesn't abuse this ability at all.
Oh, sure, 'Not now,' he says, before he immediately backs out of the newly-made hole in the Theraprism wall. 🙄
Don't worry, Bill doesn't get far.
also yeah i know this one doesn't have an attempted swear - i just wanted to use the joke because of the massive stink-eye involved in it because it makes me laugh
⬇️ More goofs beneath the brief ramble if you wanna skip it lmao⬇️
Why is Ford even there, you might ask? Well, he either decided he preferred to watch Bill suffer in person over being distantly and repeatedly harassed with the same evil desperation book for the rest of his life, or he got roped into some kind of contrived community service for 1.) all his many counts of interdimensional thievery, and 2.) his ignoring all the very clear warnings to NOT summon Bill in the first place (which I like to imagine is also illegal). Theraprism staff were just like, 'Wait, this guy matters to Bill? Ooh, we can USE that! It might be the only thing that can help him want to get better!' It is not considered that throwing Ford at Bill so soon after Weirdmageddon could instead make them both WORSE - in new and altogether special ways! :D
Anyway, I'm calling it the Community Service AU, and I am most likely not going to do anything else with it beyond appropriating these silly Good Place jokes. So, feel free to adopt the concept if y'all wanna??? Just make sure that Bill is still not allowed to swear, no matter what, full stop. It's gotta be a real linguistic corkblork of a situation for him, is all I'm sayin'.
Finally, have these bonus Good Place jokes, but with Handyman!Bill this time:
'Opposite tortures' doesn't sound so bad...at least until it's an all-powerful chaos entity known for torture saying it.
you may think i forgot mabel's cute pink cheeks but the truth is that i did in fact forget but then immediately stopped caring which makes it okay, SHHHHHHH
And, finally:
lmao this is shit
True facts, if you cram Season 1 Eleanor Shellstrop and Michael into a singular triangle shape, they turn into Bill Cipher. This is science, look it up. Or don't, and just trust the source that is me, bro.
Anyway, I should be in bed, y'all have fun with these, I guess. Tune in after like a week or so and maybe I'll have an addendum to my comic about how Bill was drawn naked for karaoke night. Because him actually being naked was not the only thing I considered as a plausible explanation. XD
Also if you see any inconsistencies or errors in any of these comics, No You Do Not :D
Also also, reblogs are rad as hell and I appreciate every single one, just don't repost, please and thanks. Every time a repost is made, an artist somewhere cries. :,)
#fanart#gravity falls#billford#bill cipher#stanford pines#stanley pines#dipper pines#mabel pines#pyronica#handyman bill au#book of bill#the good place#incorrect quotes#heck yeah i'm tagging billford - cuz these old men are EXES#jfc i said i wasn't going to color any other gravity falls stuff i made - and then what do i do?#i fukken color all of it#i may have a problem lmao#the green area outside the theraprism is because i forgot what was outside it and just went 'lol greenscreen idgaf'
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Iron &Wine/Andrew Bird-July 31, 2022 Levitt Pavillion Steelstacks- Bethlehem, PA
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#andrew bird#bethlehem#concert#folk#iron and wine#levitt#outside problems#setlist#steelstacks#toronto#twilight
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Andrew Bird, Margaret Glaspy & Julian Lage Gezelligheid Preview
Andrew Bird; Photo by David Black
BY JORDAN MAINZER
It's that time of year again--not just for Christmas or Hannukah or beer and wine advent calendars, but for Andrew Bird's annual Gezelligheid concerts at the Fourth Presbyterian Church. This year, Bird will perform 7 shows: tonight, tomorrow, and the 11th-15th. Usually, he plays a mix of original songs and holiday-related covers or standards. In 2020's Hark!, Bird has his first ever Christmas album to his name, so you can expect to hear a few of those tunes, too.
If it were up to me, Bird would gift us some instrumentals. That is, earlier this summer, he followed up 2022's Inside Problems with a companion album, Outside Problems (Loma Vista), improvised instrumentals recorded outdoors in Ojai, CA. Though it follows some of the formless themes of Inside Problems, it's wholly original and some of Bird's most inspired work in years. "Epilogue" is flaneur-like, Bird purposefully not giving thought to the potential for other band members or a chorus or structures, while cheekily titled tunes like "Mormon House Party" and "Tik Tok" use repetitive sways to lull us into the bends of Bird's violin. Best, his gorgeous voice does appear, but in the form of wordless vocalizations, harmonizing with his plucks on "Mancey" or popping up on the off beat on "Mormon House Party".
Margaret Glaspy; Photo by Josh Goleman
Opening for Bird each night is a duo comprised of Margaret Glaspy and Julian Lage, creative and life partners who have never released any recorded duo material but have plenty of history showing up on each other's records. For one, each had a hand in producing the other's 2023 album, Glaspy's terrific Echo the Diamond (ATO) and Lage's Grammy-nominated The Layers (Blue Note). Echo the Diamond prominently features both Lage and Bird collaborators (The Bad Plus drummer Dave King, bassist Chris Morrissey), and you can certainly hear Lage's jazz influences on the skittering Ryan Lerman co-write "Hammer and the Nail". Not to take anything away from Glaspy--Echo the Diamond is far and away her best album yet mostly thanks to the increasingly worn twang of her voice and ability to make worlds out of fleeting moments and the conversations we have with ourselves, in our own heads. From country-tinged odes to new love ("Act Natural") and feminist rallying cries ("Female Brain"), to reverent admittances to the power of our minds ("Memories") and self-criticism ("Turn The Engine"), Echo the Diamond runs the gamut of emotions in a lean 35 minutes. At the center of it all is Glaspy's observational prowess, or as she describes on closer "People Who Talk", her ability to "make like a fox and start listening."
Julian Lage; Photo by Alysse Gafkjen
Glaspy's influence on Lage's The Layers is a tad more palpable. Written as a described "prequel" to 2022's View With A Room, the record showcases interplay between Jorge Roeder's bass and King's drums, and at times between Lage and Bill Frisell. Glaspy's able to emphasize the raw timbres of Lage and Frisell's acoustic guitars on "This World", or Lage's expansive, twinkling playing on "Missing Voices" atop King's creaking percussion. And the title track is a chugging, almost country rock number, an instrumental that could back Glaspy without batting an eye. In fact, it wonderfully previews Lage's latest choogle of a single "Omission", produced by Joe Henry and that will feature on an upcoming Blue Note album next year. It's hard to predict what Glaspy and Lage will play, but both artists, individually and together, have the chops to make it a memorable opening set you won't want to miss.
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#live picks#jam usa#metro#andrew bird#margaret glaspy#julian lage#fourth presbyterian church#ato#alysse gafkjen#outside problems#david black#gezelligheid#hark!#inside problems#loma vista#loma vista recordings#josh goleman#echo the diamond#ato records#the layers#blue note#blue note records#the bad plus#dave king#chris morrissey#ryan lerman#view with a room#jorge roeder#bill frisell#joe henry
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Tim froze. "Huh?"
"I mean, you're definitely cute. But I don't feel comfortable with strangers? And I don't want there to be any misunderstandings."
Danny Nightingale looked flustered, nervous, and far too pretty with his cheeks flushing red under the glow of the nearby lamp fixtures. Tim wondered when his brain would finally come back online. Right now it was far too interested in putting everything else on the backburner.
On one hand, he had been trying to get information out of Danny on his connection to Vlad Masters- a connection that had seemed more tenuous with each passing minute of the evening. On the other, Tim could admit it had sounded a bit like he was inviting Danny for something more.
And if he was honest with himself, it was only mostly unintentional.
"It's not even you, I just get attached really easily and don't want something casual. Sorry."
Tim hadn't even realized boundary setting could be so attractive.
"No. Yeah, that's- fine." Smooth. The Drake-Wayne charm at its finest. Tim could hear Jason snickering on the comms.
#danny phantom#dc comics#danny fenton#dpxdc#tim drake#fic idea#vlad is about to have a bad time for many reasons and its not danny's problem or fault#braindead#deadtired#the bats dont make assumptions outside of the very quick and correct one that danny isnt complicit#what did vlad do this time is still up for debate#dick overhears the comms and is both laughing at his brother and cooing at this poor soul who is gonna get dragged into the family now#cass is giving tim thumbs up from behind danny and it doesnt help
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Andrew Bird Announces New Album “Outside Problems” for July 2023 Release
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#Andrew Bird#Mo Teef#Sigur Ros Twilight Vivaldi 4 Seasons#Violin#Music#Nature#Outside problems#Inside problems#Outside in#Inside out#Youtube
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Love a self-inflicted time loop. The main character isn’t trapped. They can stop whenever they want. But how can they when things aren’t perfect yet? They can do better than this. They need to try again. They can get it right this time. They just need to try again. They can stop anytime they want. Just one more time. They can fix this. They just need to try again. There are still things to fix. They just need to try again.
#time travel#its about the tunnel vision#its about losing sight of what a win condition even looks like#its about writing off the entire timeline at the slightest inconvenience#its about increasing alienation#its about failing to notice that youre destroying yourself and in some cases making things worse#its about the atrophy of your own problem solving skills#its about treating your friends like unskippable cutscenes#its about gradually forgetting everything outside the loop#its about the fact that you arent even really trapped#its about making the same choice over and over again#its about falling hard into the sunk cost fallacy
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saw some mangy dog on the outskirts of town
#my art#oc#els#werewolf#furry#anthro#illustration#you would not believe the hassle this gave me lmao....i want to do more with it but i have to wipe my hands of it#idk if this looks good but it has to be finished i have to be finished with it#WORD OF ADVICE that allows a small glimpse into the horrible time i've had: PLAN YOUR COMPOSITIONS#GOD. initial drawing of els: 1-2 hours at most. trying to find a composition that doesn't suck: 100000 hours and ongoing#i think my problem is this els looks better zoomed in but finding a way to keep it zoomed in....mission impossible#i love this els face though. i will admit. i had to persevere to get SOMETHING that at least vaguely worked so i could show off this els#okay. okay. anyway it's greengage season again. big ups to greengages for making life just that much brighter#also the owls are goin crazyyy outside my window rn they are speaking and i am listening. in a delirium
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All this aroace character shipcourse has proven to me that a majority of people that interact in fandom cannot actually interact with characters and media outside of shipping and genuinely I believe you need to learn how to interact with media outside of shipping.
#text#fandom#aro#ace#aroace#aromantic#asexual#this became extremely obvious with Encanto - where the main message of the movie was ignored#and people were so desperate for shipping they started shipping background characters or even the family members....eugh#like at some point you must understand your inability to interact with media outside of a narrow romantic scope is an actual problem#at some point you need to accept you don't ACTUALLY like the media you're interacting with#like genuinely can you say anything else that you like about a piece of media besides the fact you want two characters to kiss?#genuinely i do believe the way some of you interact with things needs to change because it's made fandom spaces literally unbearable#also it has severely limited some of your guy's critical thinking skills#if you want content based around shipping then look at the romance genre it's literally right there for this very reason#shipping just needs to stop dominating fandom discussions and interactions. shipping should not be the main focus of every genre ever ffs#that or y'all need to literally start tagging your shit so that people can actually block it out and find the posts that they want to see
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Marvel has a staring problem
Flash: * eating in the cafeteria minding his own business*
Marvel: *staring from across the room* (O)_(O) (U)_(U) (O)_(O) (U)_(U) (O)_(O)
Flash: *starts chewing his food slowly while glancing back at Marvel*
Marvel: *still staring* (O)_(O) (U)_(U) (O)_(O) (U)_(U) (O)_(O) (U)_(U) (O)_(O) (U)_(U) (O)_(O)
Flash: *feels as if the temperature is rising while tugging at his suit and no longer focusing on his food*
Marvel: *No longer blinking* (O)_(O) (O)_(O) (O)_(O) (O)_(O) (O)_(O)
Flash: *heavy, rapid  breathing. Now fully looking at marvel*
Marvel *only to be met with cold, empty eyes* (O)_(O)
Flash: *is at his breaking point* DUDE WHAT DO YOU WANT.
Marvel: *billy, who was deep Conversation with the gods* Huh?
#billy batson#dc captain marvel#shazam#flash#barry allen#DC#staring#staring problems#to the outside world#but was just deep in thought
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What-if pair…? Just had the thought of both of them silently enjoying their hobbies in each other’s company. (Emmy is helping, ok.)
#dragon age#dragon age the veilguard#DAtV#Emmrich volkarin#da taash#my art#sadly we don’t know enough about taash for me to draw something more interesting#I only know she’s a gym bro#outside of her whole hunting dragons thing#ahsidhd#maybe they can talk dragons since nevarra is so dragon culture#unless emmy ignored all that growing up and stuck to dead things#ahaha#dead dragons maybe#emmy probably weighs nothing to taash#she can workout with him clinging no problem#and Manfred too surely
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DP X DC PROMPT #28
(#) = Notes at the end of post
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Chartreuse
Due to the high levels of ambient ectoplasm, all the citizens of Amity Park gained a permanent change in eye color. They don't glow or flare in response to rampant emotions like true ghosts or the halfas though. They're just an unnaturally bright yellow-green.
The thing is, nobody else on Earth has this eye color, and it's never been seen in the human race until the recently graduated Amity Parkers started branching out to other cities to find jobs.
Nobody paid this any mind at first, though. Many just thought the individuals liked strangely colored contacts or it was a trick of the light. It's not until Danny and Tucker are both hired for positions in Wayne Enterprises that questions start popping up.
At first, the other employees thought the two might be related. It could happen, it's not that strange. However, when both of them said they're nowhere near related, just childhood best friends, it left everyone confused. If they aren't related and they aren't wearing colored contacts, then what are the odds of too completely unrelated people having the exact same strange and unseen eye color?
After a while, everyone just stops asking questions. After all, both men are easy to get along with and are excellent at their jobs, so a strange eye color isn't really something to complain about. Their stares were just a bit more intense than most people, and honestly, they've seen stranger things.
It helps that they've started seeing other people with the same eye color popping up in celebrity, sports, and activist circles. (1)
However, It's not until the power goes out during a late meeting/presentation, and Tim Drake accidentally turns on and shines his cell phone light into Tuckers eyes, that he starts seriously digging.
Needless to say, the animal-like green shine of his pupils scared the shit out of him and got him wondering if two of his new employees were part of a previously unknown alien race that'd recently settled on Earth without anyone noticing. When he looks into the middle of nowhere town they came from, this idea is even further cemented when he sees every person he finds a photo of have the exact same shade of chartreuse eyes. Ignoring the ghost rumors and "sightings" as just a strange tourist trap for the strange little town to make extra income, he brings the info he found to the other bats and birds.
They aren't exactly welcomed when they go snooping around Amity Park, unfortunately... (2 & 3)
✦
Now. To make this a bit more cracky, when confronted, do Danny and Tucker just come clean or do they milk the idea of them being aliens for all it's worth? (4) Add in a few strange, but perfectly normal for them, things they do that have people scratching their heads and make the assumption even worse/more irrefutable. This includes the unexplainable eye shine Tim discovered.
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(1) Paulina became a supermodel and is coveted for her striking eye color and beautiful complexion. Dash became a coach for a well known college in Metropolis, while Kwan became a fitness trainer and sponsor for health related items that actually work, also partnered with the college Dash coaches at. Sam became a notorious environmental activist and is the enemy of many companys who are determined to turn the world into a toxic wasteland. With the help of Danny's parents, she's found many eco-friendly chemical compounds that dissolve many of the toxic substances damaging ecosystems around the world. Etc, etc.
(2) Ectoplasm exposure has made everyone a bit more territorial over the town, including their protectors. They don't need outside heroes/organizations interfering with their work and don't/won't take kindly to the sudden interest hero organizations gain over them and their strange little town. That hasn't worked out too well with other government sanctioned organizations in the past and they don't want a repeat, thank you.
(3) Maybe Team Phantom even established themselves right around the same time or even before the Justice League was formed and they just flew under the radar until now. Maybe Amity Parkers feel a bit superior due to their seniority in having an excellent team in the know about the supernatural/non-human side of the world/universe? Who knows? You pick! Amity Park has been through a lot by themselves, so it's no shocker if they have an extreme amount of solidarity towards those they call their own.
(3 cont'd) Also! Since Amity Park has become so rich and saturated in ectoplasm over the years, they were eventually annexed/became an outside part of the Ghost Zone. Jack and Maddy are border patrol and any ghosts coming through need a passport now. Amity Park is basically a vacation hub for ghosts? Ghosts can freely roam the streets, they just don't wreak havoc anymore. That'd basically be terrorizing their fellow citizens at this point anyway and that's a no no. That means jail time with Walker. Amity Parkers also aren't afraid anymore and in fact CAN hit back now. This does not stop the Bat Clan and eventually the Justice League from thinking they're a town full of aliens tho. Some are just more human looking than others. Or they've been on Earth and procreating long enough with humans that their hybrid offspring have also started looking more human, is the ongoing conclusion.
(4) The Anti-Ecto Acts are not an issue here! Team Phantom already dismantled and annihilated the GIW years before they even thought of leaving Amity Park on its own. Before graduating highschool even. Yes, Team Phantom is perfectly self-sufficient and able to handle their own problems and have kept the city-wide ghost infestation pretty isolated outside a few events that were handled quickly and with the world none the wiser. So the world is still pretty ignorant of the existence of ghosts/the Ghost Zone. Would Team Phantom and Amity Park prefer to keep it that way though?
#dp x dc#dc x dp#everyone in amity park's eye color changed to chartreuse/yellow-green#the rest of the world finds this strange but it's whatever#weird things happen all the time in the dcu#tim thinks danny and tucker are part of an alien race#amity parkers are territorial over amity park because of radioactive green juice in the air#amity park is now part of the ghost zone just an outside part#competent team phantom#retired team phantom sorta#they're still on call if a new ghost shows up and gets any ideas but other than that they hung up the capes and ghost hunter gear#amity parkers are also feral enough to handle their own problems now#team phantom might as well be retired heroes turned annual trainers for new ghost hunters/liminal police recruits#danny phantom is NOT ghost king#danny phantom crossover#dp x dc crossover#dp x dc prompt#dpxdc#writing prompt#prompt
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Story Post 15 (Part 1)
AU MASTER POST
BEGINNING | PREVIOUS | NEXT (tbd)
[Image ID under the cut]
[IMAGE ID: Two pages of a black and white comic. PAGE ONE PANEL ONE: Luz stares up in fear, caught in the relic room of the castle. "Why if it isn't Eda's human pet!" PANEL TWO: Lilith looms over her. "How perfect." PANEL THREE: A distant view of one of the castle's towers. PANEL FOUR: Caleb is throwing a pot on his potter's wheel. He's wearing an apron and his reading glasses, his hair tied up in a bun. He's sticking his tongue out, calm and concentrated as he works. PANEL FIVE: CRASH! Caleb jerks comically in surprise, splattering his pottery everywhere. PANEL SIX: BAM BAM BAM! Caleb takes off his glasses, turning towards the noise coming from the nearby window.
PAGE TWO PANEL ONE: The racket continues, overwhelming the panel. An overhead view as Caleb stands up on his crutches and moves towards the noise. "What in the Titan's name is going on??" he wonders. PANEL TWO: Caleb looks out the window. "I can't see anything from here," he thinks. PANEL THREE: The noise breaks off into a screech, followed by silence. A close up of Caleb looking through the bars of his window, eyebrows raised in bemusement. PANEL FOUR: His expression changes to uncertainty. "It stopped..." he thinks. PANEL FIVE: Hunter throws the door open with a BANG, Belos following behind him. "DAD!" he yells happily. Caleb jolts, startled. PANEL SIX: "You'll never guess what just happened!" says Hunter excitedly. Caleb turns to him, wiping the clay off his hands with a towel. "Violence and destruction of property?" "Well, yes," answers Hunter, "but--." PANEL SEVEN: Belos stands at Hunter's side and rests his hand on his shoulder. Hunter puts his hands on his hips and smiles at Caleb proudly. "Lilith Clawthorne has finally captured the Owl Lady," says Belos. PANEL EIGHT: Caleb clutches his shirt as he looks at them, horrified. The panel around them is black except for the barred window behind him. "She captured her own sister?" he asks. /End ID]
#The Owl House#TOH#TOH Hunter#Caleb Wittebane#Philip Wittebane#Emperor Belos#eda clawthorne#lilith clawthorne#luz noceda#Brother's Keeper AU#doodle art#in which Caleb's hobbies are interrupted and he experiences Agony of a Witch purely through sound effects#also in which I try to depict his room from the outside for the first time#only to realize I've created a Seinfeld hallway problem and there's no way his room as previously designed fit in there#so I've redesigned slightly. SHHH don't worry about it
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Constantly citing this article and the studies it uses.
Here's a quote:
"That study shows that transmasculine individuals were actually more likely to be victims of childhood sexual assault, adult sexual assault, dating violence, domestic violence, and stalking than were transfeminine individuals (as shown in the chart below).
The only category in which trans women were more likely to be victimized was by hate violence, and even there the difference was small: 30 percent of trans women reported having experienced hate violence, compared to 29 percent of trans men."
#just an interesting finding#trans men#transmascs#transmasculinity#but you know#“shut up and listen to people who have real problems”#some of the shit you people say about trans men on this website makes me so mad#I feel like you walked into my house told me that Dolly Parton is a fascist bitch then spit in my grandma's ashes#like do you want to take this outside?#Oh I forgot#you never go outside#obviously#only a chronically terminally online weirdo could say the things you people say about trans men#I'm not a trans man and I can so clearly see the way you treat them is shitty#why can't you?#transandrophobia#they coined that word because you got mad when they applied transmisogyny to their own experiences and now you pick apart the word#as if words don't have meanings outside their root parts#I can't imagine having that much brain rot
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Alright. Willis Todd being an abusive father to Jason is a trope often utilized. Comparing this version of him to Bruce's reactions to Red Hood is fantastic. Lots to analyze there.
However, I raise you. There needs to be more fanwork addressing the classism behind Willis Todd being characterized as an abusive alcoholic. In some version of canon, Willis Todd was a good dad in a shitty situation. He was poor, his wife (Catherine) was sick, and he had a newborn baby he needed to provide for. In this horrid situation, where he has no family to fall back on and no higher education to obtain a decent well-paying job, he tries to get quick money. He's desperate to keep both his wife and son alive.
Catherine turns to drugs because it's easier and cheaper to buy drugs than healthcare. The pain she experiences is debilitating, and she'd do anything to not feel pain for one godsdamned second. Unfortunately, this turns into an addiction.
This ultimately shapes the way that Jason views crime. Bruce, while he may be sympathetic to individuals who resort to crime to pay their bills, will not understand huddling in Crime Alley in the dead of winter as he debates whether to buy food or pay for heating. He won't understand the bitterness, hatred, pain, and resignation of never having enough money to survive as you get chewed up again and again.
If Jason's dad is just an abusive criminal, that not only perpetuates the notion that all criminals are evil, but it will shape how Jason views those who commit crime. Breaking the law doesn't make someone bad. There's plenty of reasons people commit crime, whether to survive, protect someone, or something else. The issue, especially in Gotham, is the system that perpetuates wealth inequality through bribes and unethical governmental practices.
Anyway, I think Jason's Red Hood is more fleshed out if it accounts for him acknowledging the desperation behind goons and small-time criminals because he grew up without other options.
#dc comics#dc universe#jason todd#catherine todd#willis todd#as far as i know catherine's health problems (outside addiction) are implied but not explicitly stated#yes jason did crime as well as a kid but seeing your father commit crime to survive is another matter#bruce commits crime out of choice not survivalistic need#bruce has suffered but he doesn't have this experience or understanding that Jason did#bruce and jason can both understand logically that gotham systems are fucked but jason knows it intimately#jason being bitter and angry at the world for the wealth inequality and corrupt/cruel systems in place should come up more
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