#Orthodox Christianity

[soulrestinginstpetersburg]

Need this rn

[regina-del-mare]

[riiverdancer]

toji x fem!orthodox!reader, THE LONG AWAITED SEQUEL!

to whoever is reading this as of now: please do not sexualize my work as it was not written for that purpose and i worked quite hard on this piece alone. i would find that course of action extremely disrespectful on your part. also, if themes of religion make you feel uncomfortable, DO NOT READ THIS.

to anyone interested, you can find this work on my ao3 @/riiverdancer under the title "moths in my abdomen" !

synopsis: toji doesn't know how neither how to pray, nor how to sleep, so it gets awkward.

contents: events set in 2008, toji being timid around reader, toji is not familiar with his surroundings, post gege clarity, bare with me everyone.

Toji was used to keeping watch during the night while his companions slept in the tent and curses and curse users were always lurking around their campsite. In those moments, he would risk his arm going limp just by gripping onto his heavenly inverted spear in case an enemy was close by. He did not play games. Toji however, was not used to having to keep watch over nothing in the middle of the night. He was becoming less cautious and more fearful of the dark, almost like a child. His heavy heart pounded in his chest moderately faster the more he refused the offer of a good night's sleep, he was getting dizzy from staring at the hallway light that peered through the bedroom door in a single vertical line. He was going mad and he knew it. He saw that light as a string of hope saving him from his suppressed childish fears, which he blamed on his son for always asking to come over to his and his late wife's bed to sleep with them while his fear faded. Now another woman lies in his bed. A beautiful soul that is in so many ways more than Toji's. The love she had left to give poured onto him like lava and hardening so imperfectly, his heart could only beat in slow intervals, just not to crack the obsidian forming around it. But within those borders, his heart was begging for guidance of any kind. A thump at a time made the gold lightweight crucifix bounce on and off of his chest. It was the peak of his anxiety, he was beginning to choke.

This was the very same sensation he felt when he went to church, the guilt he had was seeping through the tip of his tongue, mumbling away his remorse, behind him, he knew he could feel the Devil himself creeping up behind him and in a moment of weakness, he wept. A whisper scream, if you will.

"I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it." He was genuinely spilling tears, pulling his hair by the handful, too stressed to even think about going back to bed.

This woke up his partner, who rolled from her side and groaned rubbing her eyes: "Jiji...mmh. What's wrong?"

"Ugh, forget it. I feel like a piece of shit already." Toji scoffed.

"No, don't say that." She lightly placed a hand on his chest, still sleepy. "Hold my hand."

His large hand wrapped around hers, covering it entirely and he sighed, still tired of the mental baggage.

He did the cross with his right hand and moved her curls covering the side of her face to kiss her warm cheek, a stray strand of hair getting caught in his lips. He smiled and looked at her as her head was stuffed knee deep in the pillows.

"Lord Jesus Christ have mercy on me, a sinner." She muffled, her head on the pillows, somehow urging Toji gently to repeat her words, soon becoming a coeval prayer of three times, that made Toji drop the weights he already beared.

"I'm gonna marry you someday." His heart throbbed in place as he looked at pale moon pouring over his skin. "By God, I'm gonna marry you someday." He covered himself in their shared duvet, almost instantly going to sleep after he closed his eyes.

[femalehieronymusbosch]

[sayruq]

[crisaunty]

i need u Jesus

[reality-nihilism]

"The Vision of the Cross"

Gustave Doré, 1832.

[orthodoxadventure]

'The Annunciation; details' by Mikhail Nesterov

[bloodyykissess]

[furordinaricvs]

[orthodoxsoul]

[regina-del-mare]

[soulrestinginstpetersburg]

[femalehieronymusbosch]

[apenitentialprayer]

Tomorrow (or today, if you're reading this 30 minutes after this is posted) will be the funeral of a very dear friend, the joy of my heart. If you could pray for her repose, and for the consolation of her parents and brother and friends, I would really appreciate it.

[religious-extremist]