#Operation cheer up
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God thank you @brookiedaaroacecookie for making the fic of my idea, you did great especially without me giving too many details for my AU then TwT
I made this comic of my idea with the fic basis too [I already showed it to you on discord but eh]
N: Thank you sir!
...
Uzi: Ugghhh
N: Uzi?
Uzi: ...Hey
N: Whatcha doing?
U: Homework.
N: I thought you finished it yesterday.
U: I got more...
N: That's dumb.
U: yeah...
...
N: Has your class gotten nicer...?
U: Not really... at all. I'm used to ignoring them though.
...
U: I-I know... It's messed up. I just don't have the time or energy to do anything else about this..
N: Can I help with.. you know?
U: Why not..? ouch..
N: S-sorry
U: It's okay.
N: There we go.
#lilywily post#lilywily art#lilywily comic#murder drones#serial designation n#uzi doorman#operation cheer up#operation cheer up au#nuzi#biscuitbites#Md au#Murder drones au
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some smooth operator drawings
#pokemon#my art#fanfic art#smooth operator#drawing them always cheers me up#back from my break!#fic art#pokemon black and white#pokemon ingo#pokemon emmet#pokemon elesa#submas#subway boss ingo#subway boss emmet
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wip wednesday so. here's a 'wip' (crack fic i binge wrote instead of working on my actual wips that are weeks if not months overdue in updating oh god)
necessary context: matthew has not yet learned that hob is immortal
--
“Alright, listen up, team!” Matthew cawed to the handful of dreams and nightmares gathered around him. “Most of you guys were here before me. What was it like last time Lord Morpheus had a catastrophic relationship failure?”
“Bad,” said a tiny dream in the shape of a mouse.
“Thanks. Very helpful,” Matthew muttered. “Wanna offer any specifics? Did the world end?”
“Yes,” said a ghost-like nightmare, rolling its eyes. “The world ended. This is just a collective hallucination.”
“Technically, it is a collective hallucination,” said another nightmare that looked kind of like… a computer? Matthew hadn’t even been aware Morpheus knew what computers were.
Some of the other dreams snickered.
“Hey!” Matthew squawked. “This is serious. You’re aware he’s dating a human, right? If breakups were bad, how do you think that will end?”
The collected dreams were silent.
“Eternal night!” Matthew yelled. “Doom and gloom! Tartarus in the depths of Hell! Thunder and lightning very very frightening! Do you want that? I don’t!”
“What are we supposed to do, though?” asked the little mouse dream. “Humans always die.”
“I don’t know yet, that’s why we’re here,” said Matthew, flapping his wings in agitation. “Um. Make an ark for when the Dreaming becomes Water World, maybe? Or uh. Clone Hob? No, that’s weird… Maybe we can get him an emotional support cat or something?”
“Mervyn says Hob is already an emotional support human,” whistled a dream that looked like, and was the size of, an entire forest.
“Fuck.”
“If he’s sad,” sang a music-box dream in its childlike voice, “maybe we should cheer him up!”
Matthew snorted. “How are supposed to cheer up Mister Emo King himself?”
The music-box trilled. “Everybody likes music!”
“And puppies!” yapped a Labrador Retriever.
“Sparkles?” said a dream that was just a floating star.
Matthew was feeling extremely dubious about any of these things being able to cheer up the most gothic depressed person he’d ever met, but it was going to have to do.
“Alright, guys,” he announced, clapping his wings, “here’s the plan. You all have to try to make Lord Morpheus as happy as possible so he won’t go fucking berserk when his human dies. But! Be subtle. Don’t let him know what you’re doing. And for the love of all that is holy Do. Not. Mention. The. H. Word.”
“Hell?” said a toddler dream, scratching her nose.
“No!!! Hob!!!” Matthew scrubbed a wing over his beak. “We’re all gonna fucking die.”
#operation cheer up your mopey friendless boss so he doesn't destroy the world#doesnt go exactly to plan#matthew the raven#the sandman#dreamling#(they come in later)#my writing
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i have once more Read a Book !
the book was jim morris' cancer factory: industrial chemicals, corporate deception, & the hidden deaths of american workers. this book! is very good! it is primarily about the bladder cancer outbreak associated with the goodyear plant in niagara falls, new york, & which was caused by a chemical called orthotoluedine. goodyear itself is shielded by new york's workers' comp law from any real liability for these exposures & occupational illnesses; instead, a lot of the information that morris relies on comes from suits against dupont, which manufactured the orthotoluedine that goodyear used, & despite clear internal awareness of its carcinogenicity, did not inform its clients, who then failed to protect their workers. fuck dupont! morris also points out that goodyear manufactured polyvinyl chloride (PVC) at that plant, and, along with other PVC manufacturers, colluded to hide the cancer-causing effects of vinyl chloride, a primary ingredient in PVC & the chemical spilled in east palestine, ohio in 2023. the book also discusses other chemical threats to american workers, including, and this was exciting for me personally, silica; it mentions the hawks nest tunnel disaster (widely forgotten now despite being influential in the 30s, and, by some measures, the deadliest industrial disaster in US history) & spends some time on the outbreak of severe silicosis among southern california countertop fabricators, associated with high-silica 'engineered stone' or 'quartz' countertops. i shrieked about that, the coverage is really good although the treatment of hawks nest was very brief & neglected the racial dynamic at play (the workers exposed to silica at hawks nest were primarily migrant black workers from the deep south).
cancer factory spends a lot of time on the regulatory apparatus in place to respond to chemical threats in the workplace, & thoroughly lays out how inadequate they are. OSHA is responsible for setting exposure standards for workplace chemicals, but they have standards for only a tiny fraction—less than one percent!—of chemicals used in american industry, and issue standards extremely slowly. the two major issues it faces, outside of its pathetically tiny budget, are 1) the standard for demonstrating harm for workers is higher than it is for the general public, a problem substantially worsened during the reagan administration but not created by it, and 2) OSHA is obliged to regulate each individual chemical separately, rather than by functional groups, which, if you know anything at all about organic chemistry, is nonsensical on its face. morris spends a good amount of time on the tenure of eula bingham as the head of OSHA during the carter administration; she was the first woman to head the organization & made a lot of reasonable reforms (a cotton dust standard for textile workers!), but could not get a general chemical standard, allowing OSHA to regulate chemicals in blocks instead of individually, through, & then of course much of her good work was undone by reagan appointees.
the part of the book that made me most uncomfortable was morris' attempt to include birth defects in his analysis. i don't especially love the term 'birth defect'—it feels cruel & seems to me to openly devalue disabled people's lives, no?—but i did appreciate attention to women's experiences in the workplace, and i think workplace chemical exposure is an underdiscussed part of reproductive justice. cancer factory mentions women lead workers who were forced to undergo tubal ligations to retain their employment, supposedly because lead is a teratogen. morris points at workers in silicon valley's electronics industry; workers, most of them women, who made those early transistors were exposed to horrifying amounts of lead, benzene, and dangerous solvents, often with disabling effects for their children.
morris points out again & again that we only know that there was an outbreak of bladder cancer & that it should be associated with o-toluedine because the goodyear plant workers were organized with the oil, chemical, & atomic workers (OCAW; now part of united steelworkers), and the union pursued NIOSH investigation and advocated for improved safety and monitoring for employees, present & former. even so, 78 workers got bladder cancer, 3 died of angiosarcoma, and goodyear workers' families experienced bladder cancer and miscarriage as a result of secondary exposure. i kept thinking about unorganized workers in the deep south, cancer alley in louisiana, miners & refinery workers; we don't have meaningful safety enforcement or monitoring for many of these workers. we simply do not know how many of them have been sickened & killed by their employers. there is no political will among people with power to count & prevent these deaths. labor protections for workers are better under the biden administration than the trump administration, but biden's last proposed budget leaves OSHA with a functional budget cut after inflation, and there is no federal heat safety standard for indoor workers. the best we get is marginal improvement, & workers die. i know you know! but it's too big to hold all the same.
anyway it's a good book, it's wide-ranging & interested in a lot of experiences of work in america, & morris presents an intimate (sometimes painfully so!) portrait of workers who were harmed by goodyear & dupont. would recommend
#if anyone knows about scholarship that addresses workplace chemical exposure#& children born with disabilities through a disability justice lens please recommend it to me!#booksbooksbooks#have reached the point in my Being Weird About Occupational Safety era where i cheered when familiar names came up#yay irving j. selikoff champion of workers exposed to asbestos! yay labor historians alan derickson & gerald markowitz!#morris points out the tension between workers - who want engineering controls of hazards (eg enclosed reactors)#& employers who want workers to wear cumbersome PPE#the PPE approach is cheaper & makes it even easier to lean on the old 'the worker was careless' canard when occupational disease occurs#i just cannot stop thinking about it in relation to covid. my florida library system declined to enforce masks for political reasons#& reassured us that PPE is much less important than safety improvements at the operational & engineering level#but they didn't do those things either! we opened no windows; upgraded no HVACs; we put plexi on the service desks & stickers on the floors#& just as we have seen covid dangers downplayed or misrepresented workers still do not receive useful information about chemical hazard#a bunch of those MSDS handouts leave out carcinogen status & workers had to fight like hell to even be told what they're handling#a bunch of them still do not know—consider agricultural workers & pesticide exposures. to choose an obvious & egregious example.
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hii lovely! i'm sorry you need cheering up tonight 😢 here's baby milex being adorable to hopefully put a smile on your face! oh, and some music asks to distract you: 3, 10, 21, and 25 💖 sending you hugs, i hope you feel lighter soon 💜💜
ahhh ty sweetness you always know how to get me smiling my face aff 😭🩷
3. who is an artist you put on to make you smile?
MILES MILES MILES FECKING KANE. seriously the amount of times sticking on the dfwya album has totally lit up my wee world is uncanny-
10. you have to get a lyric tattoo - which lyric is it?
oh god TOO MANY, but the one I'm probably gonna get first is 'thread it to forget it, to feel like you're already gone' from suture up your future by queens of the stone age cause I really resonate with it from getting past a particular period in my life and it means alot to me!!
21. which music video have you watched more times than you care to admit?
it's between aviation by tlsp (for obvious reasons 😭 AND ITS A CINEMATIC MASTERPIECE) and bitter sweet symphony by the verve cause I swear seeing that for the first time as a kid changed the entire trajectory of my life 😭
25. do you and anyone you know have 'a song'?
duhhh me nd you nd adios tara tara by the man himself 🙏
#operation cheer nova up is a go#and very successful#tysm lulu!!!!#asks#answered#oversharing and its bitter aftertaste
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Sojiro's voice actor is sooooo good, that "Huh?" was full of SO MUCH emotion I love it so much, it really did sound like an old man being SO CONFUSED and surprised at practically everything happened right now.
#aria rants#sounded so dumbfounded i love it#okay but like-- grand operation guys but are we rlly just gonna gloss over the mental effects to poor akiren getting#beat up and drugged by the POLICE??? oh im writing bout that. im gonna use that for fuel for jokid this is exactly#what ive been waiting for to be able to write that hurt/comfort of em in so long. also im cheering bout the fact that the#SIU Director is dead. thats what you GET for being such a yes man. bro your value was so low you can easily be replaced
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thinking abt my OCs again...
the star fam messes me up so freaking much man :((
Caelios,The Star, a guardian of life born from death.
Akemi, The Iris, a heir of secrets and rules bent on tearing it all down.
Akira, The stray son of The star and The Iris, victim of enemies and patterns of a past he took no part in. healer and protector at heart, however guarded he may be...
Naomi, Daughter of The Star and The Iris, kept safe and sound like a delicate flower within the confines of a silver cage, i wonder how long until she becomes root bound.
Nyx, daughter of a time long gone, now astray and unwinding from a broken prophecy that was never truly hers.
#*bite bite bite*#naomi being overprotected and not let outside as a direct consequence of losing akira for so many year#Akemi becoming so much like the people she hated the most; all for the sake of protecing the precious little light (naomi) she had left#Caelios taking nyx under his wing and seeing echoes of his family in her#A FAMILY *HE* BUILT FROM BITS AND PIECES; AS HE WAS BORN AN ORPHAN!!!!#akira being left to fend for himself despite the futile promise of safety#your honor!!! they are cornerstones of this entire operation#<- the narrative that is#everybody clap and cheer for the narrative´s favorites djfhjdshhdh#shut up sheo#oc talk#berryblu ocs#oc: caelios#oc: akemi#oc: akira#oc: naomi#oc: nyx#i also call akemi mimi sometimes lol#tho in canon only vik; his family and heather call her that#it´s a close friends nickname <3
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Oh, hoppy day! Get ready for National Beer Day on April 7 with amazing deals from your favorite restaurants and bars. Whether you're into lagers, stouts, or IPAs, these promotions will have you cheering. Discover the best beer deals and exclusive offers in our latest article. Cheers to great beer and even better savings!
#Cheers!#Oh#hoppy day! Whether you prefer lager#stout#pilsner or IPAs#brew lovers can all agree that National Beer Day is a cause for celebration. The drink-devoted holiday falls on Sunday#April 7#and many restaurants and bars are brewing up deals to mark the special occasion. Here are a few that'll leave you saying#ANTHONY’S COAL FIRED PIZZA & WINGS On National Beer Day#Anthony’s Coal Fired Pizza & Wings is offering dine-in customers a 12-inch cheese pizza and draft beer for just $15. To cash in on the deal#simply mention the offer at the register at participating locations. BUFFALO WILD WINGS What goes better with wings than beer? To celebrate#Buffalo Wild Wings is pouring 22-ounce glasses of Coors Light for $5 all day. BURGERFI BurgerFi is offering dine-in customers a cheeseburge#City Brew Tours is offering customers 10% off its in-person City Brew Tours (they operate in 20 cities in the U.S.)#the Beer of the Month Club (it features a new craft beer city every month delivered to your home) and Holiday Advent Beer Boxes. Simply use#you'll get a free shower beer holder and a bar of Dogfish Head beer soap (customers will need to pay the cost of shipping). Simply use the#you'll get upgraded to a liter at the following participating locations. * Arizona: Tempe * California: Alhambra#Long Beach#North Burbank#Old Pasadena * Colorado: Colorado Springs * Maryland: Bethesda#Dupont#Kentlands#Silver Spring * New York: Clifton Park * Texas: Arlington Highlands#Frisco#Richardson * Wisconsin: Ballpark Commons GOURMETGIFTBASKETS When it comes to beer#variety is always best and GourmetGiftBaskets.com has plenty of gift baskets with several types of beer. The site is offering TODAY.com rea#including a beer club. The site is currently running the following sale#just in time for National Beer Day: * $10 off any 4-shipment order with the code SAVE10 * $15 off any prepaid 6-shipment order with the cod#Mr Brews is serving up $8 beer flights and other daily promotions to help brew lovers celebrate National Beer Day. RAZZOO’S CAJUN CAFE On A#Razzoo’s Cajun Cafe is serving draft beer for $4 a pint and $6 a mug. SAMUEL ADAMS Samuel Adams has a special offer for TODAY.com readers!#it does now. Tombstone and Voodoo Ranger have teamed up to create I(Pizza)A
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Yeah that's fine
-Shion
*sound of a car pulling up* okay I'm here, you wanna come out and hop in when you're ready babe? If you want, we can go somewhere before we go home or we can go straight home, whichever you would prefer?
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CUPID N'S ARE DONE
Emotional Shifting AU
N in this au would be giving a bunch of gifts to his partners and be in Love Mode (Koi) all day
StationaryN! He just wants to dress up in lovecore
First Workers N is gonna go to a dance for Valentines (also this is just my design drawing canon N as well: so two birds, one stone)
Offbrand AU. He's in some nice clothes (and offscreen, the kids are in matching clothes)
Operation Cheer-Up. This N help out making crafts with littler kids
(Also I already did scp 14 and she's already posted)
Outsiders AU. He's a super popular worker drone that gets a bunch of gifts for valwntines from classmates.
But he just gifts them to his secret partners.
Randomized swap au! He helps with the event of those cardnations and he hands them out. He's a bit sad he didn't get one.....yet
Sickly Stars N! Super sparkly and just hear to vibe
Mcsm(or minecraft alone, idk yet) xmd crossover!! My rare minecraft art style!!!
He is using a texture pack to make some items have hearts
And my new Magical Humans AU
He's planting a heart shapped tree for his little warlock
#lilywily post#lilywily art#murder drones#serial designation n#Murder drones au#Emotional shifting au#Stationaryn#First workers au#Offbrand au#Operation cheer up#Outsiders au#Randomized swap au#Sickly stars au#Mcsmxmd au#Magical human au#Nuzi
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cheers to the “bruce wayne is not batman” tag on ao3
or alternatively, au where dr wayne moonlights at doc thompkins clinic where he keeps meeting these teen vigilantes….. WHOSE kids are these? who let these INFANTS out to fight crime? anyway he uses his sleeper detective skills to track down the vigilantes and…??? be their dad??
omg wait. the drake estate also has a cave system underneath that tim finds and opens it up as a base of operations and thats where the bat theme came from. i TAKE your batcave and i SHIFT it one plot of land to the left.
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Livestream
Shin Yuna x Male Reader
Tags: amateur porn, anal fingering, big ass, butt spanking, chat comments, degradation, deep creampies, deepthroating, facefucking, fisting, fucking like animals, gonzo, human fleshlight, lube, mating press, POV, queefing, revenge, rough sex, sex on camera, sneakers, twerking
Word count: 5826.
Shin Yuna is a high-maintenance girlfriend. You can try your best, but you know that one single man can't satisfy her insane sex drive alone. She will cheat on you every time she gets a chance. Because more than anything, Yuna only cares about sex, no matter who provides it to her.
While Itzy was on tour, you knew Yuna had cheated on you multiple times abroad. She was born to fuck and is the most unloyal, slutty girlfriend that could ever exist. You know it; she knows it. So, as soon as she arrived back home after touring for many months, you made her a proposal.
"Look, Yuna, I know you fucked countless guys while you were away. You're a dirty whore after all, but if you accept this deal, I won't give a shit," you told her. "So, what's the deal?" she asked. "I'm going to fuck you on camera, and everyone is going to see it; show them who the real owner of your slutty body is," you replied.
"So you want to record a sex tape of me? I guess it's fine. It didn't hurt Kim Kardashian when she got hers leaked, did it?" she said. "Basically, but we are going to do it live. I know you fuck better than you sing, so you have no excuse not to put up an amazing performance," you poked her.
"Sure, bring the cameras on," Yuna invited the challenge, creating an account on OnlyFans going by her English name Hussey and teasing her subscribers as she counted down the days for the livestream. You brought one of your friends to be the camera operator and got yourself a handcam to film Yuna's sexy body up close.
The stream started with you filming Yuna's beautiful, naughty face as she walked towards the bedroom. You two were about to set this whole thing up. You two kissed each other in front of the cameras. Yuna then moved in the direction of the bed. Her upper body was completely clothed, but she left her lower body already half naked, with just her panties on. Yuna was truly a natural; she always knew where the camera was and made sure to make the horniest expressions to tease the audience.
You grabbed Yuna by the neck, which brought the first massive cheers from the crowd in the comments. "Choke this bitch," they said. Yuna got on her knees on the side of the huge bed that was waiting for her, licking her tongue as she stared at the camera. You jumped your mouth on her neck like a vampire and gave her a little hickey. The room's camera zoomed on her to show it and captured her very silent but sexy moans.
The kissing and choking session continued until Yuna lied her back on the bad. The aerial view of her body was sensational, as her panties were so small that viewers could already take a glimpse of the outer edges of her pussy. You lifted her shirt and gave the audience the first peek of her boobs from the lens of your handcam. When Yuna puts her hands on her panties, you switch the angle to let them watch her teasing her pink pussy.
You unbuttoned Yuna's little skirt and put her legs over her head, letting the audience get a better view of her lower body. You licked her fabric as you teased her, and she moaned. You moved your tongue all over her thighs and hips as she spread her legs, and you gave her a little spanking.
You finally unveiled the gates of heaven, pushing Yuna's thong to the side and giving viewers the first look at her perfect pussy. "I want to fuck that pussy now," one of them commented. You teased it with your hands, poking her asshole as well and filming it. Yuna enjoyed your touch, especially when you dove to give her cunt a kiss.
You picked up some lube and poured it around Yuna's genitalia, knowing it was going to be tight even if her pussy had served as a sleeve for more than a hundred cocks during all those months of touring. Her meaty lips were driving both you and the crowd in the comments insane. You rubbed her clit hard from the start, searching for that heavenly nectar you knew she would soon gush out of it.
You inserted a pair of fingers inside Yuna's tight cunt, making her moan louder, with your thumb rubbing the hood of her clit. You already panted with the way her walls clenched around your fingers, knowing your cock wasn't going to be an easy task. Yuna is such an experienced whore; her body knows exactly how to react every time a strange object goes inside her vagina, and she makes sure to coat your fingers full of juices.
"Oh shit," you panted, already out of breath, as Yuna used her own hands to finger herself. "Damn, she must be really tight," someone commented. Indeed, she was, so much so that if your fingers had a way to shoot cum, they would be filling her pussy to the brim. Meanwhile, Yuna just moaned and enjoyed you digging deeper inside her.
You gave Yuna a little taste of her juices, which she loved. "Give me some spit," you ordered her as her face filled the camera's lens. This time, you finger-fucked her even faster, making her moan harder as you fisted her entire cunt, which Yuna took with ease, treating your arms just like an oversized cock and showing the flexibility of her vaginal muscles.
You couldn't resist for long and showed your bulging erection to the audience. Yuna smiled and quickly helped you, unbelting your pants and taking them off quickly, placing one hand on your throbbing shaft and another in her pussy. "What a nice cock," someone commented. It could have been Yuna herself, because she was already ready to take it.
Yuna quickly guided her mouth into your pecker. You zoomed right into her face, giving the perfect view of her slowly making it disappear down her warm throat with her eyes wide open. "She looks like a human fleshlight," one comment said as she loudly bobbed her head on your dick and spat all over it.
Yuna took your cock fully deep in her throat, giving you the green light to fuck her beautiful face. Your handcam had zoomed so close that viewers could see the veins both on your shaft and in her face. Her eyes turned red as she choked harder and harder on that dick, a view you wouldn't get in most professional POV porn scenes.
"Fuck her face," the crowd commented. You did just as they ordered, but soon learned it was one of those situations where an unstoppable force meets an unmovable object, as Yuna managed to take all your cock in and fight back, making you come really close to a premature ejaculation. You saved yourself by giving her a huge tap in her cheeky ass that made her react by gagging and pulling your cock out, creating a string of saliva between it and her chin while doing so.
"Give me more," she ordered as you rubbed your shaft against her mouth entrance. You knew you had to think outside the box to tame this brat. She was clearly coming out on top, moving now to twist your cock while taking it in her mouth. "Just like that," you told her. But you knew you had to end her fun if you wanted it to last long; otherwise, Yuna would milk you dry rather soon.
"AHHHHHHH!" you screamed as Yuna deepthroated you and just couldn't detach herself from your hips. You were forced to use your salve valve once again, spanking her ass for a second time. Your tip was full of her bubbling saliva, but Yuna kept looking at you as if she wanted more, licking it before she took it back in her mouth. "Holy shit that bitch knows how to milk a cock," a comment said.
Yuna was driving you insane; the harder you fucked her face, the harder she throated your meat. "Bitch wants to choke on that dick, lol," another comment said. It was time you finally showed her who was in control, but she was only getting bolder, kneeling on the bed and shaking her ass in front of the camera.
Yuna continued to throat and spit on your dick as you lied on the bed. But this time you were having none of it. Using your leg, you reached over her head and locked it, pushing your hips up and pounding her face. "Choke this bitch," the comments ordered, cheering as you fucked her face like a fleshlight and turned it into a mix of her spit, your meat, and her messy hair.
"Yes, take it, all the way deep," you ordered as you dunk her head right into your shaft. Both her cheeks now had matching tones of red. Her naked belly in front of the camera turned viewers on. "Dude needs to put a baby in that tummy," they said. But nothing got more attention than her arched-up ass while she choked on your meat. "Girl got a nice ass," the comments poured on.
The stream kept alternating the camera angles between your handcam and the bedroom's cam. Either angle, Yuna looked hot on both; one satisfied those who wanted to see her beautiful face full of cock and saliva, and the other was a treat for those who loved her hourglass body, especially when she started licking your balls like a needy puppy, leading to her shirt sliding down and unveling more of her torso.
"God damn it," you couldn't believe what you had just done, getting yourself on the edge even further as Yuna showed you she essentially had a throat made of steel. The more you pounded, the harder she could take it. "Hmm yeah, I see daddy loves when his girlfriend chokes on his dick," Yuna finally said a word besides just moaning, smirking at the whole situation and your struggles to survive the human embodiement of sex.
Yuna just couldn't stop throating your shaft. "Is this what you guys wanna see?" the chat moderator asked. "Yes, make that bitch choke on his dick," the comments answered. And Yuna was giving exactly what they wanted, coating your cock full of saliva.
You slapped Yuna's body and forced her to stop to avoid cumming earlier. As you took some time to recover from her throat attack, viewers were treated to Yuna's amazing half-naked body. "Damn, I love her legs," one said. This time, you stood up and let her lie on the bed, zooming as her tongue worked all over your balls while she used one of her hands to jerk you off. You reached under her blouse and started massaging one of her perky boobs, moaning as she filled your balls full of her lipstick, and viewers could see your cock throbbing to the fullest at the camera.
Yuna kept having fun with your balls as you slowly unveiled her torso, groping her tits a lot while doing so. "Hot slut," one commented. You fucked her face as it hung on the edge of the bed, preparing yourself for the next steps, but not without punishing her into your personal onahole, unleashing your anger over her fucking all those cocks while on tour as you pounded her face, pinched her tits, and poked her navel.
"Open your eyes, open your eyes, cunt," you ordered her as Yuna tried to close them. Your shaft hit her whole face, and your balls slapped hard on her nose and eyes. She gagged and turned into a mess of saliva, to the point where it almost looked like you had given her a bullseye cumshot. You were now shoving your balls deep in her mouth alongside your shaft, taming Yuna in the roughest way you could think. It was what she deserved for being a horny cheater who only thinks about sex 24/7. "Keep your eyes open; let them see," you told her, as the audience agreed. "Keep it open, whore; show us how much you want this cock," they said.
Yuna may have wanted your cock a lot, but at that point you wanted her pussy even more, pounding her face as you previewed what you wanted to do to her cunt. "Bitch looks so dumb choking on his dick," one commented. It really turned on the thought of degrading her in front of an audience of thousands, so you kept going, making sure to give them the best looks of Yuna's sorry, bitchy face getting completely obliterated by your massive monster cock.
"Turn around," you told her as her big ass now filled the camera's lens. "Wow, she's got a nice ass," the comments said. But better than her ass were her dangling, meaty pussy lips just hanging in there with a piece of fabric right beside it. You poured some lube at Yuna's lower parties, zooming so close that the camera managed to show the pores of her shiny, lubed butt.
You pushed Yuna's thong further to the side, removing any obstacle in your way. You teased her, rubbing your shaft against the cracks in her ass as your tip touched both her holes and your thumb fingered her asshole. "Which hole, guys?" you picked up your phone to ask. "Pussy!" "Ass!" the comments alternated at an almost 50-50 split. "You guys can't decide," you said. "I guess it'll be up to this whore right here," you said.
Yuna grabbed your shaft and made her choice. "Put it inside you," you told her as she guided it right into her tight pussy just as you two had scripted it. "Ahhhh," you let out a groan as her tightness always manages to surprise you, so much so that it was Yuna who moved first, swinging her hips to clash against yours even on all fours.
"Ahhhh, yes, baby, bury it deep in your pussy," you told her. Yuna enjoyed that even in the most submissive position, she could own your cock. Heck, she could own any cock; they were always whipped, throbbing, and hard, ready to enter her holes at any second.
"Take me, daddy," Yuna orders, arching her hips even further up. Her ass cheeks are already red and on full display for the audience. You zoom closer towards your cock, going in and out of her pussy, which leads to some complaints. "We want to see her ass," some comments say. You oblige, grabbing Yuna's ass as you pound her and showing it on camera.
It doesn't take long for you to pump fast. "Shit," you groan as her pussy crushes your massive shaft like nothing. You take very long thrusts inside Yuna, going all the way and then pulling all the way out. Her moans are a mix of sexy and cute, straight out of JYP's school of slutiness.
Yuna takes your cock with ease; you're just another guy for her countless count. The same can't be said about you. This is the first time you fuck her since she started touring, and adjusting to her ultra-tight pussy proves to be very challenging. Meanwhile, for Yuna, it's just the best sensation; a big cock stretching her holes while holding itself not to burst at any second makes her feel really special.
"Damn, I'm really that slut; Daddy is struggling not to fill that pussy to the brim, right?" she asks. You ignore her provocative ways, trying not to let her get into your head. But you already know her pussy already owns the other head on your body, making it throb and pulsate each time it touches the depths of it.
You let Yuna swing her hips freely, taking some time to record it. She doesn't make it any easier on you, slowly descending on your cock at each bounce. She lets the audience know how much she loves it by winking her asshole right as it gets to the center spot of the camera.
"Come on, bro, fuck the shit out of her; that whore is begging for it," one guy comments. You lose your cool and start pushing fast, spaking Yuna's ass every five seconds. "Fucking dirty slut," you tell her. Her pussy turned you into a primitive ogre that can only pound, spank, and groan while doing so. The camera zooms out and shows you taking on Yuna, who stays like a perfect submissive cocksleve. "Just like that," you tell her as her moans get louder and the camera switches to a top view of her slutty body, with Yuna having to cling to the bed to endure the intensity of the pounding you're now giving her.
"Get this shit in your pussy, whore," you tell her. "Oh my God," she moans as you get rougher, taking your clothes off. Yuna, however, takes advantage of you slowing down and goes back to swinging her hips. "Come on," you tell her, loving the way she bounces and clashes against your hips.
Yuna almost makes you burst once again as you escape yet another close call. She slows down and brags about her perfect, tight pussy. "Tell me, Daddy, you were sick of those fleshlights while I was on tour, right? They can't hold a candle to my tight little pussy, right?" she provokes.
You respond by hammering her even harder. "Fuck me hard, daddy," Yuna tells you, her knees almost falling out of the bed. You do as she wants, bringing her body up and choking her. "Hahaha, choke that bitch," the comments enjoy it. Yuna closes her eyes and licks her chops, a moment the camera captures perfectly.
Yuna's legs get weaker as she loses her breath and collapses into the bed. You take advantage of it and plow into her pussy from behind as you start prone-boning her. The camera moves to the back and shows her wide open pussy turned into a fleshlight as you pound the shit out of it. "Holy fuck, he's going to destroy her," some comment. She starts moaning, her long legs up in the air with just her sneakers on, your faces no longer visible on the camera as you two turn into an animalesque fucking where you're just a raging bull pounding a slutty cow.
"Oh fuck," Yuna moans as you make her completely helpless. The bed starts shaking, and loud noises come from its supports cracking as they try to hold it in place despite you burying your cock deep in Yuna's cunt and pressing her body as hard as you can against the mattress. "Look at her pussy farting," some say in the comments as you stretch it out nonstop and it starts queefing. The more it goes, the less you feel compelled to stop, and as much as Yuna is getting completely obliterated, so does she.
Yuna tries to fight back and arches her ass up. That only makes the crowd react even better. "Bro is fucking her like a dog," one comment says. The loud noises from her pussy getting wetter as you pound her confirm she really likes it rough. You go so hard, her long legs start to swing, and her sneakers hit the camera. "Oh, oh, oh," she moans. That only makes you go more animalesque, putting your body fully on top of her and penetrating her pussy at a straight angle.
"Damn, he's mounting on top of her," a comment says as the camera zooms into your cock, completely stuffing Yuna's cunt and eviscerating her body into submission. Yuna pretends to fight, but she can't do anything; you just bury your cock further deep in her pussy and behave like a dog in heat. "God, he's such an animal," a comment says as you remain on top of Yuna for a good five minutes and she starts howling at each thrust, with her turned into nothing but a cocksleeve.
"Fuck me, daddy, don't stop," Yuna commands. Not like you intended to stop at all; you own her pussy now. The stream viewship reaches further peaks as word of mouth starts to spread out, and people are really enjoying what they are seeing.
"Destroy that bitch," the comments command you. With one hand, you pink Yuna's body; with another, you spank her fat ass. "This is what a proper whore looks like," the comments continue as the camera shows an utterly hopeless Yuna completely pinned to the bed, her naked back and thong to the side making her look like a cheap prostitute.
You push Yuna's body sideways for the viewers better enjoyment. She is completely out of breath as you switch into a spooning position, but keep the intensity. Her little boobs bounce to the camera as you kiss her while pounding the shit out of her. Yuna spreads her legs and reaches down to finger herself. She grinds her teeth, as even for such an experienced slut like her, taking so much cock at such a fast pace is hard.
You take a more passionate approach with Yuna, filling her beautiful face full of kisses, but not forgetting the roughness as you choke her and stay pounding her at all moments. But soon, your animalesque side takes over again as you make it harder and harder for Yuna to breathe, choking her so hard she coughs. But better for you is that the more you choke her, the harder her pussy tightens and throbs.
As you slow down, Yuna, still recovering from the pounding you gave her, lifts her legs for you to finally take her thong off completely. Viewers get the perfect view of her pussy, with her danling inner lips and long outer lips in full display. Yuna then takes her shirt off as you massage her boobs, getting fully naked except for her sneakers. You two kiss each other, then you lower her head and feed her the juices from her cunt.
Yuna looks at the camera; her fully naked body is a treat to the audience. She teases the crowd. "What do you guys want next?" she asks. But you quickly try to put her in her place, shoving your cock back in her cunt and fucking her as the camera captures her body in a close-up and Yuna puts her fingers in her mouth.
The high-intensity affair that follows proves a missionary fucking isn't always vanila. You and Yuna give full effort, entertaining the viewers with torrid fucking and multiple hot moans from her and animalesque groans from you. Her boobs jiggling and the bed cracking as you pick up the pace offer and extra teasing—that gets even better with the close-ups of your cock stretching her pussy out.
Yuna's pussy only gets tighter as the fucking goes on, forcing you to pour even more lube. This time, you entertain the audience by placing it not only in her crotch but also all over her naked torso, making her giggle as the cold liquit hits her erect nipples and perky boobs. Yuna spreads the lube over her body as you continue to fuck her, helping you slide your hands with more ease and tease her as you film her body as eye candy for the viewers.
"Show them your pussy," you say as you zoom into Yuna's cunt and spit on it and finger it as your cock keeps pumping it. The camera captures your pounding perfectly, with you zooming in and out and teasing Yuna's boobs to the audience as well. She moans as you pick up the pace and work all over her clit. "Cum for the camera, baby," you order her, as the clit-fingering continues all the way until Yuna blasts her juices into the lens filming her.
You spank her cunt shortly after Yuna cums. "Good girl," you tell her, groping her tits too, rewarding her with a mating press fucking that ramps up the intensity even further. Viewers can't even see her face as your frame completely covers it, but what they can see damn well is Yuna's ass jiggling and wobbling as you clash your cock right against her hips.
"Damn girl, where did you get that ass?" one comment asks. Yuna holds her legs up and grabs her sneakers as you pound her even harder, choking her again as well. "Stupid cheating whore," you tell her as you spit on her face and top her completely. "Oh my Godddddd~" Yuna can barely breathe as you manhandle her pussy, making her look completely limp and helpless, with your balls slapping her cunt at each thrust.
Yuna tries to escape from your grasp, but she looks completely numb now. She flashes her pussy to the camera, as it doesn't take long for you to fill it again. Her boobs get groped as you spoon her into the bed. "Dude's addicted to her pussy; she must be amazing," someone comments.
Yuna looks at you with her eyes full of lust; one of your hands stays on her neck; another grabs her tits as you passionately continue to fuck her; and she rediscovers what made her fall in love with you: pure, raw, unfiltered hard sex. "You're a fucking animal, daddy," she tells you, as at this point you can only think of fucking her pussy until you die.
The stream stays for a good 10 minutes on some sexy and passionate action between you and Yuna as you two enjoy each other with lots of fucking between hugs and kisses, trying as many positions as possible, but with you taking control as always and turning Yuna into your submissive fucktoy until you finally manage to get tired. Still overwhelmed by so much sex, you and her take a break as Yuna knees and throats your cock with her ass turned right to the camera.
"What a delicious ass," one of the comments says as Yuna ruins what was still left of her makeup by diving deep into your cock. She slowly blows your pipe up, savoring every inch of it and covering it full of her spit as she gargles all over that dick. "Are you ready to sit on it?" you ask her. Yuna doesn't answer, instead taking some good minutes twisting it and getting increasingly sloppy, going all the way down your balls to throat it, and then licking your throbbing shaft as it pulses.
Yuna puts on a great show for the camera, moaning as she sucks your dick and fingers herself. "I want a camgirl like this for me," a comment says. Her little performance captivates the audience. "Now that's a slut who knows what to do," as all eyes focus on her, with Yuna winking to the camera as she deepthroats you to the fullest and covers your cock even further with spit.
You barely survive Yuna's deepthroat as she keeps worshipping your cock, her perky tits bouncing as she makes a mess of your dick, and groaning as she rotates her mouth on it. "Bitch is biting that dick like a dog," a comment says. "Fuck my face," she demands as you get back on top of her. "Lmao, look at her dumb face." The comments continue to fly as you fill her mouth full of cock and bulge under her throat.
Yuna licks your balls as you rub your cock all over her slutty face and make her choke on it further afterwards. She loves the way you treat it like a fleshlight. "Now I think it's ready for me to sit on it," she says.
Yuna positions herself as you guide your cock back into her pussy. Her big ass occupies a large chunk of the frame as your cock slowly disappears under her cheeks. Her moans when she descends down that dick are extremely sexy, as she starts bouncing her ass all over that cock, already putting you on the edge. "Damn, that girl knows how to shake that booty," someone comments.
The camera keeps filming Yuna twerking her ass on your dick as she tries different angles and leads the crowd in the comments to go wild. "Bounce that ass, bitch," they comment. Her performance is so sensational and immersive that it feels like she's bouncing on the cock of someone in the audience. "Oh my God, ahhh, ahhhh, ahhhh," she moans as you hit her cervix. "Damn, this is way better than VR porn," someone comments.
"Oh damn, that's perfect," you tell Yuna as she moves towards fast and straight bounces. Her fat ass causes a quake each time it hits your hips. "Damn, I love that angle," someone says as Yuna's butt is right at the center of the screen and keeps being the star of the show. When you accidentally slide out of her pussy, Yuna starts to tease you, grabbing your shaft and rubbing it all over her butt, paying special attention to her asshole as she pokes your dick on it a few times.
"Come on, keep going," you tell her as Yuna puts your cock back inside and smashes it with hard and violent bounces. "Girl is giving that dick a workout," a comment says. You spank her ass as she gives you yet another close call, but that only makes her go harder. "Spank that bitch," people command in the comments.
You put an end to Yuna's slutty show as you get back on your feet, putting her back on all fours and pointing the camera right at her ass. Your cock pumps her hard and deep as viewers watch it to the fullest, seeing your shaft go in and out of her. More ass-spanking ensues as Yuna begs you. "Spank me, Daddy, please," she says. The camera keeps moving but always lands at a spot where viewers can see a lot of her fat ass while your big cock stretches her pussy.
The camera finally zooms out of Yuna's big ass, and viewers get a glimpse of how tired both of you are after almost an hour of fucking like animals. You two keep going regardless, trying to find every extra dose of energy just to enjoy each other's bodies to the max. At this point, Yuna can barely move, as you are completely on top of her.
You give Yuna a break as you two switch sides, and she gets back on top of you. The camera zooms out back into the crowd's favorite asset. If they want her ass, then let's show them as Yuna sits back on your pole. Her eagerness for sexy goes so far that she is bouncing hard the moment you're back inside her. "Ahhhh, yesss," she moans. Both of your bodies get close and wrapped against each other as you two share the love for each other as you suck her tits while she bounces on you.
Yuna grabs your chest and keeps bouncing, but can barely endure more than 10 seconds now. She's exhausted; her heavily pounded pussy is throbbing. You just slow down and make love with her. Until she delivers the message.
"Breed me, Daddy," she tells you, making you flip a switch. The animal inside you awakens as you put her back against the edge of the bed and give her a hardcore mating press. The crowd in the comments starts to go wild. New viewership peaks are hit every second, and little did they know things were about to get spicier.
Yuna becomes your submissive fucktoy as you spread her cunt for viewers to see. You then slowly mount on her and ragdoll her body. "Holy shit, he's going to destroy her," the people in the comments say. The cameras capture what is essentially a real-life hentai. You, on top of her, press Yuna's body down the bed as you plow the shit out of her pussy. Her face completely disappears, as all viewers see now is her big ass bouncing at each thurst.
"Ahhhh, yessss, fuckkk," Yuna moans as your cock obliterates her pussy. Now you're only going to stop when you cum. The rampage keeps going on as the comments flood the chat. "Pump your cum deep inside her." "Keep fucking the shit out of that bitch," "Destroy this slut," "Look how hard her ass bounces," and so on.
"Give me, please, cum in my pussy; oh my God, give me your cum," Yuna begs, her voice cracking as she can barely stand straight after over an hour of pounding. You start screaming, and soon you grant her wish. "AHHHHHHHHHH," you yell as you empty your balls in her pussy, getting so addicted that you keep fucking her even after you finish.
"Holy fuck, he just can't stop," the people in the comments say as you fuck Yuna until your last drop of cum hits her pussy, resting on top of her with your cock still buried deep in her cunt as you kiss her. "Dang, that was hot," someone in the comments says.
You finally pull out of Yuna. Her pussy is filled to the brim. "Oh my God," she says, not even thinking straight. She was not on the pill and started thinking she'd get pregnant soon. You bring up a speculum and insert it in her cunt, showing viewers how much you filled it up. "Damn, bro turned her into a cum dump," one says as they watch your seeds resting in her throbbing cervix.
As you remove the speculum, Yuna masturbates herself, trying to expel the cum from inside her pussy, with the broadcast ending as she coats her camera full of her juices after a hard squirt. "Ohhh, fuck," are the last words as the livestream ends.
"You did so well today, you fucking whore; guess you missed daddy's cock," you tell Yuna, already off-camera. "And you missed my tight pink pussy, didn't you?" she replied back. You call your friend in the other room, who was operating the broadcast. It turns out he had come on his pants while doing so, unable to resist the sex appeal of Yuna.
The livestream ends up being an amazing success, getting lots of views and bringing tons of money to both of you and Yuna. "You made a great choice of thumbnail there," she tells your friend, talking about her choking on your cock.
Seeing the success of her first attempt, Yuna asks you:
"Hey baby, want to do another one?" she asked
"Maybe later, what do you want this time?" you reply
"I don't know. Maybe anal. A DP. Or even a gangbang where you watch me get destroyed by half a dozen cocks."
Damn, the more you give her, the more she wants. Yuna is, indeed, a very high-maintenance girlfriend.
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the carlos sainz roast
summary: it's carlos' 30th birthday and what a better way to celebrate it than roasting him. wc: 2.8k
folkie radio: happy birthday to the smooooth operatorrrrr. i hontesly LOVED this idea that randomly popped in my head and writing it was sooo much fun, i hope you like it !
MASTERLIST | MY PATREON
Carlos Sainz was turning 30. The big 30.
You wanted to do something special to celebrate it, something out of the ordinary that he would never forget. After spending multiple hours on the internet looking for ideas, a brilliant one came to your mind: A roast.
"So all of you will take turns roasting me? Like making jokes about me?" Carlos asked, looking at you from the couch as you pitched him your idea.
"Exactly, baby, It's going to be so much fun!"
The next few weeks flew by in a whirlwind of preparations. You sent out invitations, coordinated with the other drivers, and gathered embarrassing photos and funny stories about Carlos.
The night of the roast, you transformed your living room into a makeshift comedy club, complete with a small stage and a spotlight. Each driver that arrived at your house complimenting your effort.
As everyone settled into their seats, you stood up and tapped your glass with a spoon to get their attention.
"Welcome, everyone, to the Carlos Sainz Roast!" you announced, catching Carlos's eye and winking at him. "We're all here to celebrate the man, the myth, the legend... the one who always leaves the toothpaste open - Carlos Sainz Jr. on his 30th birthday. And what better way to show our love than by mercilessly making fun of him?"
Laughter rippled through your friends as Carlos playfully rolled his eyes, "Thank you, amor, that's very nice of you."
You playfully blew a kiss his way before speaking again, "Now, before we start, let's remember the rules: keep it funny, keep it respectful, and try to speak slowly so Max can understand." You shot a teasing glance at Verstappen, who grinned and shook his head.
"First up, we have Charles Leclerc, Carlos's teammate and the only person who can make Carlos look slow on a good day. Charles, the floor is yours!"
Charles stood up, straightening his jacket as he approached the makeshift stage. He cleared his throat dramatically, his eyes sparkling with mischief.
"Thank you for that introduction," Charles began, "You know, when I first heard Carlos was joining Ferrari, I was excited. Finally, someone to make me look good! But then I realized, with his luscious hair and chiseled jaw, he was going to steal all my sponsorship deals. So I had to step up my game."
The room erupted in laughter, Carlos included.
"But seriously," Charles continued, "working with Carlos has been an experience. He's like a Spanish version of Google Maps – always recalculating, never quite sure where he's going, but somehow ends up in the right place eventually. That's why I had no doubt in my mind he was going to find an amazing car to drive next season, my bet was on the Safety Car but he opted for an even slower car, a Williams!"
Everyone erupted in laugh again, making Carlos shake his head with his eyes closed, "That one was low, Leclerc."
Charles took a moment to catch his breath, then added with a grin, “And Carlos, now that you’re 30, you’re officially a veteran in the sport. But don’t worry, no matter how many years go by, you’ll always be the guy who can make a Ferrari look like it's in a constant state of panic. Cheers to you, mate!”
You grinned at Charles as he stepped down, patting Carlos on the shoulder. "Alright, that was pretty good, Charles," you said, "But let's see if Lando can top that. Norris, you're up!"
Lando bounded up to the makeshift stage, his trademark cheeky grin plastered across his face. He adjusted the microphone, clearing his throat dramatically.
"Well, well, well, if it isn't the birthday boy, Carlos 'Smooth Operator' Sainz," Lando began, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "You know, when I first met Carlos at McLaren, I thought, 'Wow, this guy's got it all – talent, looks, charm.' Then I realized it was just his hair products messing with my senses."
The crowd burst into laughter, Carlos included, you ran a hand through his famous locks and he gently grabbed it to place a kiss on your palm.
"If I'm being completely honest," Lando continued, "Carlos taught me so much during our time as teammates. Like how to perfectly time a dad joke in team radio, or how to look devastatingly handsome while finishing P7. Essential skills in F1, really."
The room erupted in laughter once again, with Carlos shaking his head in amused disbelief.
"Carlos, you're one of my best friends," Lando's tone softened slightly, "Even if you did spend most of our time together trying to teach me Spanish pickup lines that work about as well as Ferrari's strategy team."
"But I have a girlfriend and you don't, mate. Even with my bad pickup lines." Carlos jabbed, making you throw your head back in laughter.
As the laughter died down, Lando raised his glass. "To Carlos, the man who proves that you can be devastatingly handsome, irritatingly talented, and still somehow likeable. Happy 30th, mate. May your midlife crisis be as smooth as your overtakes."
Lando stepped down from the stage, approaching Carlos who stood up from his seat to give him a hug.
"Love you, mate," you could hear Carlos say, making you smile.
"Next up, we have Fernando Alonso, Carlos's longtime mentor and fellow Spaniard!" you announced, making everybody clap as Fernando took the stage.
"Ah, Carlos. I've known him since he was just a little karting prodigy. Back then, I thought, 'This kid's going places.' Now, 20 years later, I realize I was right – he's gone to every midfield team on the grid!"
The crowd roared with laughter as Fernando continued, "But seriously, I always thought Carlos had potential, and I was right, he's got the potential to be the second-best Sainz in Motorsports!"
Carlos playfully rolled his eyes, taking a sip from his drink.
"But let me tell you something, Carlos," Fernando's tone softened slightly, "You've made all of Spain proud. You've shown that with hard work, talent, and a famous last name, anything is possible in F1. Well, almost anything, winning a championship might still be a stretch!"
As the laughter died down, Fernando raised his glass. "To Carlos Sainz Jr., the man who proves that you can be a great driver, a fan favorite, and still be overshadowed by your dad at family dinners. Feliz cumpleaños, amigo!"
Fernando stepped down from the stage, approaching Carlos who stood up to give him a warm, laughing embrace. As they parted, you stood up to introduce the next roaster.
"Now, let's hear from someone who's known Carlos since their early days in Formula 1. Please welcome to the stage, the reigning world champion and certified cat lover, Max Verstappen!"
Max sauntered up to the stage, he adjusted the mic and grinned at Carlos.
"If it isn't the new old man of the grid," Max began, earning chuckles from the crowd. "You know, Carlos and I go way back to our Toro Rosso days. I remember when we first met, I thought, 'Wow, this guy's got great hair.' Then I realized that's all he's got!" everyone laughed once again, "Back at Toro Rosso, Carlos was always so dedicated. He'd spend hours studying my telemetry, trying to figure out how to be as fast as me. Spoiler alert: he's still trying!"
The crowd roared with laughter, Carlos included, as he playfully threw a napkin at Max.
"But in all seriousness, Carlos," Max continued with a grin, "you've always been one of the most hardworking and determined drivers on the grid. You never give up, no matter how many times you've been dropped by your teams mid season."
Carlos laughed, raising his glass to Max in a mock toast. "Thanks for the reminder, Max."
"Carlos, you're one of the best guys in the paddock. With your resting bitch face and all, you're always there with a helping hand. Even if your driving skills are debatable," he added with a wink. "Happy 30th, mate."
Max stepped down, and Carlos stood up to give him a hug, both of them laughing. You took the mic once more, "Thank you, Max, for that trip down memory lane. Now, let's welcome to the stage a man who's known for his infectious smile and his matchmaking skills. Please give it up for Daniel Ricciardo!"
Daniel bounded onto the stage with his characteristic enthusiasm, flashing his famous grin.
"G'day, everyone! Carlos, mate, happy birthday!" Daniel began, "You know, I've known Carlos for years, but my proudest achievement was introducing him to his lovely girlfriend, YN," you smiled at this, feeling Carlos squeeze your hand, "I thought to myself, 'This bloke needs someone who can put up with his golf obsession and his constant need for mirror checks.' And boy, did I deliver!"
The crowd erupted in laughter, with you and Carlos exchanging amused glances.
"I remember the day I introduced them," Daniel continued, "I told YN, 'Look, he's a great guy, but be prepared for endless conversations about tyre management and the perfect hair product.' Little did I know, she'd be nodding along enthusiastically!"
You playfully rolled your eyes as the audience chuckled.
"But seriously, folks," Daniel's tone softened slightly, "watching these two together is like watching a perfect pit stop - smooth, efficient, and occasionally involves someone getting sprayed with champagne."
Carlos pulled you closer, placing a kiss on your cheek as everyone 'aww'ed.
"Carlos, mate," Daniel concluded, raising his glass, "you've found yourself a keeper. Someone who can navigate your mood swings faster than you navigate Eau Rouge. YN, love, you've got yourself a man who's smoother than a freshly paved track... at least when he's not tripping over his own feet trying to impress you."
Daniel stepped down from the stage, approaching you and Carlos. You both stood up, enveloping him in a group hug, all three of you laughing and thanking him for his words.
"Alright, that was brilliant, Daniel. Now, let’s hear from let's hear from someone who's about to get very familiar with Carlos's driving quirks. Please welcome to the stage, Carlos's new future teammate, Alex Albon!"
Alex strode up to the stage with a playful grin, adjusting the microphone as he faced the audience.
"Well, well, well, if it isn't my new teammate, Carlos Sainz," Alex began, "You know, when I heard Carlos was joining Williams, I thought, 'Great, someone to help push the team forward!' Then I remembered his time at Ferrari and realized he's just as confused about strategy as the rest of us."
The room erupted in laughter, with Carlos good-naturedly shaking his head.
"But seriously, Carlos," Alex continued, "I'm excited to work with you. I mean, who wouldn't want a teammate who's been through more teams than I've had podiums? Toro Rosso, Renault, McLaren, Ferrari... Williams is just the latest stop on the Carlos Sainz World Tour, isn't it?"
Carlos raised his glass in mock salute, chuckling along with the audience.
"I have to say, though, I'm a bit worried," Alex said, feigning concern. "I've seen how competitive you are, Carlos. I just hope you remember that at Williams, we're usually racing against the clock, not other cars. But hey, at least you'll always beat the safety car... probably."
"You know, Carlos, I just realized we have something else in common besides our great hair and questionable career choices. We're both proud members of the 'No Appendix Club'!"
The room burst into laughter, with Carlos nodding in amused agreement.
"That's right, folks," Alex continued, "Carlos and I have both had our appendixes removed. I like to think it makes us more aerodynamic, but let's be honest, in Carlos's case, it's probably just made room for more hair product."
Carlos playfully patted his hair, eliciting more chuckles from the audience.
"But seriously," Alex said, "I suppose this means we're perfectly matched as teammates. We're both down an organ, so when Williams inevitably asks us to give 100%, we can honestly say we're already giving everything we've got - minus an appendix, of course! Happy birthday, teammate, here's to a season of driving a tractor, but at least we'll be together."
Alex stepped down from the stage and approached Carlos, who stood up to give him a hug patting his back.
"Now, let's welcome to the stage a man who needs no introduction, but I'll give him one anyway. Seven-time world champion and fashion icon, Lewis Hamilton!" you said and everyone clapped.
Lewis sauntered up to the stage with his characteristic cool demeanor. "Carlos, my man," he began, "I've got to hand it to you. You've had quite the career. Toro Rosso, Renault, McLaren, Ferrari, next year Williams, it's like you're collecting team merchandise,"Lewis grinned mischievously as he continued, "You know, Carlos, I've got to thank you. You've done such a great job warming up that Ferrari seat for me. It's like you were my personal seat heater all along!"
The crowd roared with laughter as Carlos playfully buried his face in his hands, and you rubbed his back comfortingly while chuckling.
"But seriously," Lewis continued with a grin, "You've made that Ferrari seat look good. I just hope I can live up to your legacy of looking devastatingly handsome while trying to figure out what on earth the pit wall is thinking."
Carlos laughed, shaking his head in mock despair. "Thanks, Lewis. I appreciate the… kind words."
"You know, Carlos, I've always admired your ability to stay positive," Lewis continued his roast, "No matter how many times you've been dropped from teams, you always manage to smile for the cameras. It's like you've mastered the art of looking happy while screaming internally. I'm taking notes mate!"
After a few more jabs Lewis concluded his roast, several other drivers took their turns at the mic, each adding their own flavor to the celebration. George joked about Carlos's infamous beach photos, Pierre told some stories about their Toro Rosso days and even Oscar joked about being surprised about being invited since him and Carlos always push each other off the track.
Finally, it was your turn. You stood up, feeling a mix of excitement and nervousness as you approached the stage. Carlos looked at you with a huge smile.
"Well, well, well," you began, locking eyes with Carlos, "what can I say about Carlos Sainz that hasn't already been said? He's talented, he's handsome, and he's the only man I know who spends more time on his hair than I do."
The room filled with laughter as Carlos nodded in mock pride.
"But seriously, living with Carlos is an adventure," you continued, "He's always talking about smooth operations, but let me tell you, there's nothing smooth about the way he leaves his socks all over the house. It's like living in a minefield of sweaty foot prisons."
Carlos threw his head back in laughter along with the rest of the guests.
"And don't even get me started on his competitiveness. Everything's a race with this guy. Brushing teeth? Race. Getting dressed? Race. I'm surprised he hasn't tried to overtake me in bed yet!"
The room erupted in cheers and wolf whistles as Carlos turned a shade of red.
"But in all seriousness," your voice softened, "Carlos, you're the most incredible person I know. You're kind, passionate, and you never give up, whether it's on the track or trying to convince me that paella is a breakfast food."
You raised your glass, "To Carlos, the love of my life and the smoothest operator I know. Happy 30th birthday, mi amor. May your future be as bright as your smile and your pit stops be faster than your hair routine."
As you finished, Carlos stood up, his eyes shining with laughter and love. He pulled you into a tight embrace as the room filled with applause and cheers.
"I love you so much," he whispered into your ear, kissing your temple softly.
"Well, folks, I think we've successfully roasted Carlos to a crisp," you said with a grin. "But before we wrap up, I think it's only fair that the birthday boy gets a chance to respond. Carlos, amor, the floor is yours!"
"Wow," he began, his accent thicker than usual, "I'm not sure whether to feel honored or insulted. But I guess that's the point of a roast, right?" He paused as chuckles rippled through the room. "First off, I want to thank all of you for being here. It means a lot that you'd all take time out of your busy schedules to come and insult me."
Carlos thanked each of his friends with a blend of humor and sincerity, making everyone laugh. He playfully teased Charles about making him look good on track, jested with Lando about the success of his Spanish pickup lines with you, and expressed gratitude to Fernando for his mentorship while vowing to become the best Sainz in motorsports.
"And finally, to my beautiful girlfriend," Carlos's voice softened as he looked at you, "Thank you for organizing this amazing night, and for putting up with me every day. You're the real smooth operator here."
The room erupted in cheers and applause as Carlos stepped down from the stage. You met him halfway, wrapping your arms around him in a tight hug once again.
"Happy birthday, amor," you whispered in his ear, pulling away to kiss him softly.
#carlos sainz x reader#carlos sainz fanfiction#carlos sainz blurb#carlos sainz smau#carlos sainz x yn#carlos sainz angst#f1 x reader#f1 fanfiction#cs55 x reader#formula 1 fanfiction#formula 1 reader#carlos sainz imagine#harrysfolklore#cs55 fic#carlos sainz fic#f1 fic#f1 grid x reader#formula 1#carlos sainz#monza gp 2024#carlos sainz smut
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Family Affair ~ Max Verstappen
Summary: it’s a family affair at the singapore grand prix as the entire verstappen family come to cheer max on
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ynusername just posted
liked by maxverstappen1, danielricciardo and 103,382 others
ynusername: I’ll give you three guesses as to where we’re off to 🏎️
tagged: maxverstappen1
28,492 comments
maxverstappen1: well aren’t I just the luckiest dad/husband in the world 🩷
username1: we love when the verstappens all show up
username2: I can’t deal with how cute you all are
charles_leclerc: yesssssss!! leo can’t wait for all the pup cuddles this weekend
ynusername: nvm the kids, all the cuddles will come from me
danielricciardo: it’s been too long, can’t wait for the fam to reunite
maxverstappen1: @/danielricciardo you do know you’re not actually family…don’t you?
danielricciardo: @/maxverstappen1 can you stop ruining my dreams please and thank you
redbullracing: we’re preparing ourselves for all the chaos 🤯
username3: watch max be exhausted before even getting in the car dealing with the kids and y/n
username4: cannot wait for the verstappen spam all weekend 😍
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liked by landonorris, carlossainz55 and 2,291,202 others
maxverstappen1: project verstappen junior is well underway, checkout y/s/n learning the ropes during practice this morning 🏁
72,291 comments
schecoperez: when I’m next in need of a new engineer I’ll be sure to give y/s/n a call!
ynusername: @/schechoperez he would absolutely love to work for uncle checo ❤️
username4: just when we all thought these kids could not get any cuter, max posts this
username5: it’s the baby uniform for me 😅
oscarpiastri: y/s/n already looks like he does a better job than anyone at mclaren
mclaren: @/oscarpiastri we’ll pretend we didn’t hear that
ynusername: I’m never gonna be able to escape f1 am I??
username6: max must be the proudest parent seeing his son so in love with what he does
pierregasly: little guy is looking good in blue max!!
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redbullracing: when all the verstappens are wearing blue, it only means one thing 🏆🏁
tagged: maxverstappen1 and ynusername
28,491 comments
maxverstappen1: another big push this weekend team, with my favourite mascots I’m sure p1 has my name all over it
username7: petition for team verstappen to come and cheerlead for me instead
username8: asking for a friend…can your ovaries burst just from a photo?
ynusername: team max! (and @/schechoperez 🎉)
username9: if anyone was wondering where all the good genes went…look no further
username10: pls tell me that is max’s helmet that y/d/n is wearing, it’s drowning her 😭
ynusername: @/username10 don’t worry, it is, she insists on trying it on when max finishes it, the stench is gross
maxverstappen1: @/ynusername excuse me, I always smell a million dollars
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maxverstappen1 just posted
liked by redbullracing, alex_albon and 3,032,583 others
maxverstappen1: on pole for tomorrow, job done for another day, now to rest up and relax for tomorrow. not sure how possible that will be with the kids, the pink bow was a new low 🥺🩷
68,302 comments
estebanocon: mate the bow should stay…really brings out the colour in your eyes
georgerussell63: sorry max, I’m never going to be able to take you seriously again
ynusername: damn love, y/d/n really has got you wrapped around her little finger 😂
maxverstappen1: @/ynusername what can I say? she really is a daddy’s girl 😊
username11: look at his smile, that’s a true proud dad smile going on there
username12: I swear max you have never looked better 😍
carlossainz55: almost at smooth operator level there max!!
maxverstappen1: @/carlossainz55 from you sir I will take that as a complete
pierregasly: that reminds me, I really must update your photo contact on my phone
fernandoalo_oficial: you lose all street cred the moment you become a dad I’m afraid max
username13: not all the drivers finally taking revenge and getting back at max 😂😂
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ynusername: the three stages of race week with children. 1) run around with loads of energy. 2) begin to tire but remind yourself how cute your children are when they give you cute notes. 3) completely collapse after the race when you realise your children have tired you out before the lights even went out. sorry bub, but remember we love you dearly 🩷🩷🩷🩷
tagged: maxverstappen1
42,593 comments
maxverstappen1: I’ll be good as new for tomorrow, spending time with you guys will always be my priority. I love you all so much more 🥺❤️
landonorris: I remember the days when max used to write me cute notes like that 😭
danielricciardo: @/landonorris and the days when he used to play tag with me around the paddock too
landonorris: @/danielricciardo he’s abandoned us now for the kids…my heart is broken
yukitsunoda0511: that looks like a man trying to get five minutes peace from his kids on the right 😂
maxverstappen1: @/yukitsunoda0511 guilty as charged
username13: just when I think we possibly couldn’t get anymore cute dad max photos for the weekend, we end up getting more
username14: you just know that max absolutely dotes on his two angels
oscarpiastri: petition for the two of you to adopt me, I want to be part of all this fun too 🥺
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maxverstappen1 just posted
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maxverstappen1: singapore p1 🏁🎉 couldn’t have done it without my incredible team cheering me on, having them beside me constantly reminds me of the sacrifices they all make. y/n, y/s/n, y/d/n, you guys are the best. thanks for all the support team, now to soak up all the daddy cuddles before the next one 🔥
tagged: ynusername
194,328 comments
ynusername: words cannot begin to express how proud we are of you!! nights like this simply don’t get better my love 🤩
redbullracing: congratulations on a great week of racing max, enjoy the time with your family now
username15: poor y/d/n looks so exhausted, it must be hard work cheering for daddy
landonorris: are those daddy cuddles just from y/s/n and y/d/n????
maxverstappen1: @/landonorris what exactly are you implying?
landonorris: @/maxverstappen1 🫢🫢🫢🫢
charles_leclerc: congrats on a great week max, an honour to share the podium with you again
lance_stroll: lovely to finally meet all the family my man, enjoy the rest and recovery with your little ones
username16: are we all just going to pretend like we don’t know what lando is hinting at back there?
username17: max screams daddy material…literally 😅
georgerussell63: we couldn’t not let you win this one…we just didn’t wanna upset the kids 😂
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liked by maxverstappen1, lewishamilton and 629,402 others
ynusername: husband, father, grand prix winner, is there anything that this man can’t do? we are so proud of you max, every time I think you can’t achieve more, you go and prove me wrong. thank you for the best weekend with our little team ❤️🔥
tagged: maxverstappen1
42,402 comments
carlossainz55: he’s yet to beat me at fifa…that’s something he can’t do 😂
logansargeant: I swear you guys are the ultimate goals, if anyone asks, this is how I want my future to look!!
maxverstappen1: thank you for cheering me on, I hope you guys know that I do all of this for you 🥺
ynusername: @/maxverstappen1 ofc we do, and once again you’ve reminded our children that hard work really does pay off
danielricciardo: I remember the days when he used to hug me like that 😭
ynusername: @/danielricciardo MOVE ON AND LET IT GO 😂😂😂
username18: he’s lucky to have someone as amazing as you in his corner y/n
username19: pls tell me this is the last post this weekend, my heart can’t take anymore adorableness 💔
landonorris: go team verstappen!! (I’m secretly rooting for you guys!)
redbullracing: remember y/n you’re always welcome in the paddock, we’ve loved having you, y/d/n and our future world champion y/s/n with us this weekend 😊
——
I hope you enjoyed this little smau, any feedback or requests would be gratefully received 🥺🥺🥺
˗ˏˋ 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ! ´ˎ˗
#f1#f1 imagine#formula 1#formula 1 x reader#f1 x reader#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#formula 1 x you#formula 1 social media#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 fanfic#formula one#max verstappen imagine#max verstappen#max verstappen x reader#f1 smau#formula 1 smau
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you don't have to pay overdraft fees ever
the biden administration recently cracked down on overdraft fees which means banks cannot force you to pay them as they have become opt-in -- however you do have to call the bank (for example, paypal payments overdraft you even if you have opted out, as they function like checks.)
my experience is with wellsfargo but i imagine that most major banks may operate similarly:
if you have an overdraft fee, call the bank, you will get a machine. go through the autentification process with it but do not mention your issue when it asks you to (specially not the word overdraft -- this is a conspiracy theory i cannot prove but i swear to god they rewire you to more aggressive phone people if you tipoff the machine) instead say "i'd like to speak to a representative" the machine will be like "lol didn't get that" so you may need to repeat it a couple more times before it wires you to a real person
wait! i'd recomend calling as early in the morning as possible to avoid elevator music.
be nice to the customer service person who picks up (i make a point of thanking them for their help and calling them by their name, if i don't catch it the first time i ask them again for it)
my script is something along the lines of: "hi, i noticed there's an overdraft fee in my account that posted on [date]. i am calling to see if we (WE -- you and the representative are a team against the problem) could do something about it" (<- you may decide to be more direct, i just put my innocent hat on)
most if not all of what they say to you is a script. they will be like "i will check that for you with the automated process that takes into account you previous refund activity" BLAH BLAH BLAH. more waiting. if you have had any refunds in the past 12 months, they will be like "sorry the system says no (:" THOUGH, VERY RECENTLY, they have tacked on this question: do you have any thoughts on that / how do you feel about that / etc. though even if they do not prompt you, here's the next step:
say: thank you! i appreciate the automated review, however i do not agree/approve/consent to being charged a fee. is there any way you could check again / anyone else i could talk to / would it be possible to refund it regardless? etc.
they will check again, possibly more waiting, and then you will get an immediate refund! in the rare case they refuse to, here is the link to the FDIC website that you can refer to (note, this is for overdraft fees only):
8. i cannot emphasize this enough -- be nice !!!!!!!!!!! BE NICE! be cheerful, say "thank you" and "no worries" and "take your time!". it is NOT a confrontation, it is NOT their fault, and most of the time the customer service representative wants this to be as frictionless as possible. they are helping you, use the opportunity to make a moment of their day a lot less stressful than they expect it to be.
that is ALL -- i have been using wellsfargo for over eight years, and have lost hundreds of dollars to predatory overdraft fees charged as a punishment for having no money.
during the beginning covid, when they were momentarily suspended (you had to mention covid on the phone to get them back lol), i came to the realization that all of this time they could have been giving me my money back. there was no reason not to, except corporate greed.
do not let phone social anxiety let them take your money from you, now that it is easier than EVER to get it back. and if you need motivation to pick up the phone, remember this headline from a couple of years back lol:
DEATH TO CAPITALISM !!!!!!
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investigation: start! ⤫
➢ summary: when visiting the third division, there’s never a shortage of questions and confusion about you. a few take it upon themselves to get to the bottom of it.
➢ content: hoshina x fem!reader, 2574 words, nosy officers, jealous hoshina, suggestive at the end, iharu has a crush on you, slight spoilers for the manga for certain instances to make the plans make sense but it’s vague
➢ notes: i was reading thru character profiles and it made writing this a little easier w the interactions 🫡 hope u enjoy
prequel - pt. 1 of slice & dice - pt. 2
The lives of the higher-ups were always a topic of discussion for the members of the defense force. If anything, it seemed to be entertainment and gossip to exchange and bond over between divisions. One of the hot topics includes Commander Ashiro’s childhood, courtesy of Kafka.
The only person they couldn’t get anything on was their own Vice-Commander. He was already an enigma himself with that cheerful yet unsettling grin, and they were all witnesses to the receiving end of his narrowed stares during training. The most they could get out of him was a boisterous laugh that shared nothing. They were getting bored.
But with boredom comes the urge to seek new things. And in this case, dirt on Vice-Commander Hoshina.
There wasn’t much they could see initially–until you came along.
Now, you weren’t an uncommon sight for the Third Division officers. They would see you hanging around Okonogi or eyeing a few of the new officers during training with an intense gaze that they didn’t know if they should feel flattered or intimidated. Most of the time, however, you were in close proximity to Hoshina. During division meetings, the officers never saw a day without the two of you conversing in some way whether it be through words or standing right next to each other. There was no blatant physical contact but the distance between you two was a little odd to say the least.
So some took it upon themselves to start a mission.
Kikoru would never voice her true intentions out loud but it was clear that she was as invested as her companions were if her constant questions about the matter said anything about it. She was influenced by her close peers and their enthusiasm definitely fed that.
Reno didn’t want anything to do with it… at first. He changed his mind after only an hour and he thinks it’s due to spending too much time with a certain someone who loved entertainment. Iharu sneezes in the distance.
Kafka was simultaneously wanting to join the younger members in their antics, though he wasn’t sure he wanted to risk another week of pushups. While he would admit that his arms were tougher, those exercises reminded him of the embarrassment every time he miscalled his commander. But the thought of having some knowledge about Hoshina was interesting, to say the least.
It seemed they were all bored overall.
Ultimately, they all decided to make a plan and figure it out separately. Your division was visiting for a week and reconvening would wait until the weekend. It was time to investigate.
Minase was the one to kick it off, prompting her fellow members to gain more confidence. It all started with an innocent encounter in the operations room when she, Kikoru, and Hakua passed by.
There were voices inside but the most prominent ones were yours and Hoshina’s. The Vice-Commander was a little surprised to see them when they intercepted at the door but it is quickly masked when you step out, a hint of a smile on your face possibly due to the joke he told you only moments before.
“Now, what’re you three doin’ here?” The Vice-Commander asks, hands in his pockets while you stand slightly behind him with your head tilted.
Minase always had a good ear being a great listener for her peers and was able to hear what he had said to you. It was a flirty quip, but not enough to not be told to a close friend. Upon seeing that she had caught both of your attention, she smiles.
“Good afternoon!” You greet her as well but a silence falls over you five. It’s a bit awkward–Kikoru side-eyes her friend to see what the whole stopping and rushing over here was for, but Minase had a plan already set. “We were actually looking for you, Commander,” she looks directly at you and you raise a brow at the implication of her tone.
“Oh?” You take a step forward. “What for?”
“Some training tips, is all. After the last session you gave us, it motivated us to work on our blade work even more!” Like Hoshina, your preferred way of fighting had nothing to do with the guns everyone else used. You hum in acknowledgement.
The Third was full of promising new officers and it would be a waste to not help them hone their skills even more. But you were sure Hoshina was pushing them enough with his own swordsmanship. You even learned a lot from him yourself.
Hakua stifles a choked sound when Minase elbows her gently, not expecting to be put on the spot just like that. And despite already being told of their group’s plan beforehand and having her outgoing personality, it was still a nerve-racking request.
“Y-Yeah! You seem close to Commander Narumi so we thought you guys would have similar fighting styles.” In your head, you think they’re referring to how he’s the strongest and anyone would want to learn from the best of the best. Gen wasn’t the easiest to get a hold of and you felt flattered they would ask you directly, so of course you would help out.
On the side, Kikoru is tasked with watching the Vice-Commander. Not all reactions were verbal and she was the most observant of the three, but she couldn’t maintain her eyes on him the whole time lest he get suspicious.
But now she thinks her eyes have deceived her. At the mention of Commander Narumi, Hoshina’s eyes peek open. She sees how they darken more as Hakua talks about your fighting styles but just like his initial surprise earlier, that expression left as quickly as it came.
She tucks that away.
Vice-Commander Hoshina had his “Kaiju killing eyes” at the mention of Commander Narumi. Don’t know what that could mean. - Kikoru
That’s jealousy! - Minase
Now you see what I mean about his eyes?? - Kafka
Iharu was infatuated with you from the get-go, though you would say that his first inspiration was Commander Ashiro. Saving him that day was what began his journey into the Defense Force, but it was you who motivated him to alter his fighting style to keep up with Reno.
Speaking of the latter, he was sitting beside him in the cafeteria as the two tried to think of a plan for their part. They caught wind that Kikoru’s group got a promising lead and it was up to the rest to solidify it. But they’ve been stuck for the past hour trying to come up with their own thing and asking for training would be a stolen idea.
Reno watches as more and more officers walk into the shared area and grab their meals from the line. They’re a mix of your division and the Third Division members conversing among themselves and he immediately sits up with his idea. Iharu turns his head in surprise to find Reno’s attention already turned to him.
“What? Got an idea?” Reno nods fervently and brings both of their heads down to speak more quietly. Iharu raises his brows at the proposal and his cheeks turn pink. He’s outspoken, yeah, and confident, sure, but this was you.
His friend pleads with him. He relents.
It’s not too long before you step into the cafeteria with the goal of lunch like everyone else. Spending time with Okonogi was great and all but she fried your brain with data only she and your Operations Leader Sora could keep up with. This was grounds for a well-deserved meal before your joint training session as well.
Iharu watches as you get in line and as he stands up to line up behind you, and like Reno predicted as you grab your tray, you see the officer. To his and Iharu’s surprise, you greet him first.
“Officer Furuhashi, right?” You ask after grabbing your tray. There’s a bright look on your face at the excitement of seeing the man who impressed your previous Commander. He shakily nods and you smile in response. “Commander Ogata said a lot of things about you.”
Iharu lets out a polite chuckle. “All good things, I hope?” He gets a laugh out of you and you both fall into a comfortable conversation as you move down the line. Reno watches the door and he hopes the timing works out, or Plan B would have to be used. At least Iharu was having a good time.
It’s when the two of you reach the end of the line and walk towards Reno’s table does Hoshina appear from the doorway. The red-haired officer doesn’t see him yet and your conversation is at the point when you have a hand on his arm as you’re gushing over his newfound ability with his Kaiju suit. He feels a strong hand clamp down on his shoulder and Iharu freezes, looking to his side to see his Vice-Commander.
“Vice–”
“Afternoon, Officer Furuhashi. Whatcha two talkin’ about?” By then your hand still hasn’t left his arm and he feels Hoshina’s grip get tighter. Iharu places his tray down onto the nearest table and your hand drops to your side but you didn’t notice.
“His new ability,” you answer, “we were talking about it earlier with the operations team, remember? I was just looking for you, Officer Furuhashi, I’m so glad I got to talk to you.” Your answer is so sincere and he feels like he could melt right then and there. But to the side of him, there was also a strange sensation in the air.
It was akin to bloodlust.
“The same here.” Iharu answers and bows, “Please, enjoy your lunchtime.” Before you can say anything more, he turns on his heel straight towards Reno with his head down.
The two sit there in silence as you look on in confusion before Hoshina pulls you along with him for his lunch. They aren’t looking at the two of you but Reno already got what he needed.
Vice-Commander Hoshina almost broke Furuhashi’s shoulder. I saw he also had one of his blades behind him while they were all talking. - Reno
WHAT?? - Iharu
By the way, what was plan B? - Kikoru
Iharu asks her directly if she’s dating the Vice-Commander. - Reno
HELLO?? - Iharu
Hi. - Kafka
Kafka knew he was going to be the last of the bunch to get this done. The digital community board on their group chat was a smart idea by Minase and he was able to see what the younger officers were trying to do with this mission.
Kikoru and her friends got the first response but it needed more. Reno and Iharu got the “more” and all-in-all needed one final piece to set the puzzle. Kafka was proud of them but was currently in a situation with absolutely no idea as to what he was going to do. He thought that was more than enough to assume there was a relationship between the two of you, but Kikoru kicked him for that, too.
Was there any way to get you to confess about it? He thought about asking you directly but even though you were younger than him, you still held a higher title. And he didn’t want to face the potential wrath you could unleash for asking such a question. Were you the type to dish out punishments like the Vice-Commander? Again, he didn’t want to risk it.
He had to do it soon too, you and your division were leaving in the morning and it would be another month or so before you and Hoshina would be seen in the same vicinity.
Kafka sighs and runs a hand through his hair. This was troublesome but they were counting on him.
He looks around the library he’s doing his nightly study session and sees that the time is very close to midnight. He’s shocked and now there’s absolutely no way he’s going to catch you at this hour, not unless you were training anyway. His best bet was to find you early in the morning but even that was a bit of a gamble.
Deciding on his defeat, Kafka puts his books and pens away before heading out into the hallway back to his room. He gets a sense of deja vu when he sees the light of the training room still on and assumes it’s the Vice-Commander again, and it wouldn’t hurt to watch him in action, right?
He walks up to the slightly open door and stops in his tracks at the sight. Both you and Hoshina were holding blades. Your’s were slightly longer and his were the typical ones he used during outside missions. Needless to say, they were the real deal.
In the blink of an eye, you’re lunging towards each other and Kafka thinks if he blinks even once, he’d miss about five slashes shared between you two. Following Hoshina alone was already too much but watching someone match his speed? It was out of this world.
The match only lasts for about half a minute, ending with a knife to both of your throats from the other. A moment of heavy breathing follows before you groan and toss your head back in exasperation, both of you simultaneously lowering your weapons.
“I still can’t get that last one right!”
“It was close! And hey, ya got the blade to my neck.”
“I always get the blade to your neck.” You roll your eyes. Hoshina was the best swordsman there was and it was incomparable to your personal weapon, so of course he would be better than you at it. ‘Whatever, I’m heading to bed.” Hoshina lets out a laugh. You put away the practice weapons and as you head to the door, Hoshina pulls you back to him by your wrist.
“Wait a second,” he says and leans his head down to yours.
Kafka, in the meantime, ducked his head to avoid being seen at least a little longer knowing he was not running away to hide in time. There aren't any more words being exchanged and he thinks there’s something else going on in that small bit of silence.
He pops his head up and makes eye contact with Hoshina’s open eye.
Got pushups. - Kafka
Damn. Sorry old man. - Iharu
So you got caught? Amateur. - Kikoru
Leave me alone! I tried. - Kafka
So you really didn’t see anything? - Reno
Oh, yeah. They kissed. - Kafka
…
What? - Kikoru
I got caught by the Vice-Commander. Scared me. :(- Kafka
…
HUH?? - Kikoru
Bonus:
After Kafka leaves, his head hung low at the premonition of more punishment, your arms stay on Hoshina’s shoulders.
“Did you have to do that?” You muse, playing with the shorter hairs near the nape of his neck. He shivers at the feeling but his eyes open slightly and they’re not looking at you so softly.
“Did ya have to talk about him before training?” He counters back. He knows what you’ve been doing. You scoff.
You also know what he’s been doing. The murderous intention at the mention of you and Gen, the physical warning during lunch at Iharu, and even a mark of possession to the poor older man who was just joining in the fun of his peers.
“Of course,” you bring him down to you, your lips brushing against the shell of his ear. You feel his hands tighten on your waist.
“What are you gonna do about it?”
©inzaynety 2024
#kaiju no. 8 x reader#kaiju no. 8 fluff#kn8 x reader#kn8 fluff#hoshina x reader#hoshina soshiro x reader#hoshina#hoshina soshiro#soshiro hoshina x reader#soshiro hoshina#fics
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