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whateverisbeautiful · 2 months ago

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♥️Reveling in Richonne - TOWL

#61: The Happy Ending (1.06)

The Grimes family is reunited.😭🙌🏽

That's it. That's the intro. 😋 Because we just gotta dive right in and break this super rewarding and moving Grimes family reunion all the way down. It's everything. 🥹...

First off - The way we WIN.

After so many years, we really got to witness our babies get their happily ever after with their babies. They won. We won. 🎉😭

And the biggest reason I say we win is because something that we love lives. Richonne's story has been able to live to its fullest potential and in the most captivating and fulfilling way. From the iconic start in TWD to this impactful conclusion in TOWL. 🙌🏽

When working on these TOWL revelings, I tried to have the majority of them written and ready before I even started sharing the posts in July to ensure I’d deliver on my promise and follow through to the end. These final Grimes Family reunion posts are the only ones I put off writing for a while because, as far as we know, this is it. 🥲 The last page we get to see of Richonne’s beautiful years-long story. The last new Richonne scenes to break down and revel in.

Since TOWL was announced as a 6-episode miniseries, I’m currently approaching this final scene as the official conclusion of Richonne's story. I know Andy, Danai, and Scott haven't outright said they're never reprising these roles, and the more I hear their answers to the questions about a return, a part of me thinks they know they're coming back in some capacity, be it a cameo or more, and already have an existing contract perhaps, which is why they can't 'spoil' anything by confirming or denying a return.

The way I view it - if Richonne makes another appearance, I'm absolutely seated and celebratory. And if they don't, I'm absolutely satisfied and grateful for what we got. As the gift that keeps on giving, they've already given us over 10 years of golden Richonne content, and this Grimes Family 2.0 reunion put a lovely bow on top of this gift. 💝 It was truly a beautiful and fitting conclusion to their story. And most of all I want the Grimes Family to get to live happily and at peace together, so I'm more than elated with how Richonne's story comes to a close here. 😇

So, as the broadcast announces “A historic day to begin a new chapter for the Republic” - which of course Rick and Michonne Grimes would be the ones capable of bringing about a fresh, historic, and thriving new chapter for a whole city of thousands - we see a glimpse of Judith sitting beside her walkie. And then I love hearing Michonne on the other end say, “Shoto, it’s Daito.” 🥹

Ahhhhhhh the Grimes family reunion was happening! 🥳🥳🥳 And I'm so glad it's with the original actors too. 😭🙌🏽

I remember there was a period when some were a bit worried that Richonne wouldn't reunite with their kids in TOWL. For me, I felt so sure it was gonna happen because that was the only way Michonne and Rick would feel their mission was successful. And I love how it gets confirmed that they’ll be seeing the kids as soon as we see this walkie-talkie moment.

...Even tho for some of us, the Grimes family reunion was basically confirmed a little earlier, when a certain two illustrious actors filmed a trip down memory lane in Senoia, Georgia. 🤭

Our lovely captains have a sweet little exchange during that great memory lane special that clued me in on what to expect. There's a part where Danai is talking about Judith and RJ and how she loved seeing Judith with the mini sword on her back. Then, as others also picked up on, Danai said something to Andy about how now Cailey has nearly outgrown the sword, and she seemed to think Andy could co-sign that she has. And that had my extra self’s ears perking up. 😋

Because Andy had been having to work double time to recall some TWD scenes he was actually a part of during this trip down memory lane - so I said to myself - Self, it is highly unlikely that he knows if Cailey, who he never had scenes with, is now outgrowing the sword…unless he’s already filmed a scene with her wearing the sword. 😏

gif cred: @nerd4music

So yeah, after that I was no longer even 1% unsure if Richonne would have their family reunion. It was happening. 💯 And the way it happened is Love personified. 👏🏽💗

It had to be such a euphoric moment for Judith to finally, after over a year, hear her mom on the other end of that walkie that she said she'd always keep with her. And it had to be euphoric for Michonne to no longer get static but finally get her baby girl on the other end. 🥹

I remember it was emotional watching Michonne and Judith's final walkie-talkie conversation in TWD, especially knowing they'd eventually fall out of range. And so it was a great feeling to see their walkies finally make a connection again.

I like the way it’s shot with the walkie on the steps and Rick’s holster and gun on Judith’s hip. Again, Michonne summed it up perfectly when she said Judith is her and Rick. And it’s sweet seeing Judith immediately grab the walkie when she hears her mom’s voice.

Also knowing Michonne was able to reach Judith on the walkie, I think this would definitely imply that Rick was able to talk to or at least hear Judith before they see each other in person. I’d be so curious what that very first exchange over the walkies was like between Michonne, Judith, and Rick. I'd imagine it was quite emotional for Rick to hear Judith's voice on the other end for the first time. 🥲

So then there’s the return of Rick’s battle-tested cowboy boots as he steps off the helicopter. And I really like the way it’s shot as we just see his feet first and then Michonne’s feet join him. It feels like yet another way to illustrate and celebrate that Rick is no longer alone. The love of his life found him and now they really will be by each other's side for pretty much all things going forward.

gif cred: @taiturner

As TV's greatest husband and wife step off the helicopter, we get to see Rick and Michonne more fully and I adore that they’re holding hands. 🥰 They always look so married. And as has been established, holding hands is one of Richonne's favorite things.

And then you know we gotta take a moment for Michonne’s outfit 🔥🔥🔥. Cutest outfit she’s ever worn. 👏🏽 I LOVE it. 🤩

gif cred: @alwaysthequietones

It’s great how they chose something that feels both fresh but also so true to Michonne for her final outfit and it just feels like she’s again getting to return to herself through the clothing. A fashion It Girl, through and through. 💅🏽

Michonne stayed proving an apocalypse does not have to stop you from stylishly color-coordinating and accessorizing. And I love the cowrie shells being back in her hair too. One of the last times she wore cowrie shells - a symbol of fertility - RJ arrived shortly after. So of course seeing the shells in this finale had my Richonne baby fever activated. 😋 It’s also great she got her katana back as well. That sword will always find its way back to its Mama Michonne. 👌🏽

And I of course also love that Michonne and Rick are wearing matching colors. A signature Richonne thing to the end. 😌 And Rick and Michonne matching in that tan color is great because the color scheme is giving "Must've been something else then." 😊

Then, I think it’s such a touching and well-acted moment when, before we even see the kids, we can tell that Richonne has spotted their kids from the way they react. 😭

Something about the way Michonne holds Rick's hand and then runs to her babies just feels like such a wife and mother and it’s so sweet. Like if you showed this running clip out of context to someone unfamiliar with the show, I feel they'd immediately be able to tell that who Michonne and Rick are running to is their children.

I love how Michonne drops her bag and just immediately runs to the kids. And then it’s precious that Rick sees his children for the first time and drops his bag as he eagerly runs to them as well. Goodness, this whole thing is just heartwarming x10, I can’t. 🫠

gif cred: @nat111love

And it gets extra heartwarming when we see Judith and RJ for the first time, sprinting to their parents with the biggest smiles on their faces. 😭😭😭 Richonne's babies are here. 🥹

gif cred: @alwaysthequietones

The way I rejoiced seeing the adorable Grimes kids running the first time I watched. 🙌🏽 I love seeing how ecstatic they are and the way Judith looks back at her little brother as they run. A true big sister. And of course, I adore that Judith is wearing the sword like her mom and her gun in her holster like her dad and that RJ is wearing his dad's signature Sherriff hat and dressed like little Carl. It’s all so perfect. 🥹

And for me, watching this scene would be the hardest Try Not To Tear Up challenge yet, because the way Judith and RJ smile and run into Michonne’s arms, and the three embrace - My heart bursts. 😭❤️‍🩹

gif cred: @riickgrimes

They all hold so tightly to each other and it’s precious. For a long while, the only Grimes family Judith and RJ had been used to was just the three of them. So it’s really sweet that the three of them have a moment to reunite after missing each other for so long. RJ's smile and Judith's face when she hugs her mom always makes me want to cry.

gif cred: @nat111love

(Side note: There are people out there who ignorantly discredit and downplay Judith and Michonne’s mother/daughter relationship and that will forever be foolish to me (though sadly not surprising 😪). Judith has only ever known life with Michonne, and Michonne has been raising Judith since before she could walk. Their mom/daughter status cannot be denied. Interestingly, Judith is the one Grimes kid who has only ever known life with both Rick and Michonne. Carl was old enough to recall when Michonne entered his life. RJ is old enough to recall when Rick entered his life. But Judith doesn’t recall when either entered her life because her parents have been raising her since she was in diapers. They’re the only mom and dad she’s ever recognized. Yes, Judith knows Michonne didn’t birth her but that’s not the only qualification one needs to be a mom. In every other way, Michonne has been Judith’s mom for as long as she can remember. So when Judith looks at Michonne it’s clear she sees her mom, not 'the woman who looks after her', not her 'play mom' - her mom. 👌🏽)

I love that Michonne gets her own moment to reunite with her kids and that they let that moment breathe. Michonne is the anchor to this reunion as they all look to her as the connecting piece of this family right now. It’s realistic for the kids to take their time greeting Michonne because that’s the only parent they really know.

And just like Rick and Michonne had to do a lot of sacrificing on this journey, so did Judith and RJ.

These kids sacrificed valuable time with their mom so that she could go bring their dad back home. So I love that they get to have a moment of being just so elated to be back in their mom’s arms.

Rick stands in the back of the shot, as he anxiously awaits greeting his kids. I know Rick appreciated seeing this moment between the three and immediately seeing that his kids love and view Michonne just as highly as he does. He got yet another reminder that he chose the perfect woman to be the mother of his kids seeing the way his babies beamed and ran in Michonne's arms. 😊

gif cred: @riickgrimes

And then it is again so precious when Michonne and the kids look at each other and whisper "Hi" and just again have these joyous smiles on their faces.

gif cred: @riickgrimes

RJ’s quiet little ‘hi,’ 🥹 Michonne asking how they’re doing and acknowledging they’ve got so big since she last saw them, 🥹 the way they can’t help but smile and laugh, 🥹 and then when Michonne and Judith put their heads together. 🥹 I love every second.

gif cred: @riickgrimes

Michonne finally gets to hold the two who fueled her to keep going even in the moments during this TOWL journey where it felt like all was lost. She was not going to let her kids down and she was going to ensure she made it back to them.And Judith and RJ knew their mom would make it back to them too, no matter how long it took.

I also love seeing Michonne’s M bracelet in the shot. Again, she really came back adorned with gifts from her husband because Rick loves her the way a cherished wife should be loved. And of all the gifts Rick has given Michonne, we know she cherishes most the gift of their children. 💛

gif cred: @riickgrimes

It really is beautiful how we went from Michonne telling Carl one kid was enough for her to her now having four kids (…and counting possibly). And I love the way it's visible how Michonne's soul just lights up so brightly as she holds her kids in her arms.

So as the three embrace, Rick stands back and watches his beautiful family. And the way Rick is looking at them, it’s clear this is all so surreal for him.

It makes sense that Rick would hang back for the reunion as Michonne has a moment with their kids. It reminds me of how on Carl’s last day, Rick approached it like he understood Michonne and Carl needed their time together as a mother and son because he knew he was losing his son and Michonne was too. Also, it's evident during this reunion that Rick wants to be mindful of whatever contact Judith and RJ want with him.

So Judith gives one more smile over at her brother and mom, as Michonne adorably lifts up RJ’s hat and embraces her baby boy, who is not such a baby anymore, saying, “Hi there.”

And then Judith turns to Rick with a smile. As they look at each other, Judith becomes emotional and starts to cry. She walks to Rick and finally, after all this time, gets to embrace her dad. 🥹

gif cred: @twdfranchise

Y’all, there is a reason I put off writing these reunion posts for so long. 😭 This entire scene between these four makes me emotional for so many reasons.

I think it’s so sweet that Rick is letting his kids set the tone for how they want to interact with him in this scene. You know if it were up to him, he’d probably be bawling and pulling them into an embrace, but he also knows that he’s in some ways a stranger to them now. So the thoughtful way Andy plays it, I love that it’s clear Rick wants to let the kids decide what they’re comfortable with. And the second Rick knows they want to hug him, he so tenderly and lovingly hugs them back. 🥹

gif cred: @twdfranchise

The way he hugs Judith, you see how layered this moment is for Rick because he’s so happy to be back with his daughter and also sad to see just how much he’s missed as she’s done a lot of growing up in his absence.

Plus, during his time with the CRM, Rick had to devastatingly accept that he may never see Judith again and even tried to convince himself that maybe she'd be safer if he didn't come home to her and protected her from afar. I feel like hugging Judith right now, Rick probably feels so overcome with emotion knowing that he's actually getting to hold his daughter after thinking he'd never get this chance again.

Hearing Judith cry as she hugs him and seeing the fatherly way Rick holds her head and tries to hold it together while clearly feeling so many emotions. I cannot. ❤️‍🩹 My heart is moved during each part of this Grimes family reunion.

While still hugging him, Judith emotionally says, “I knew it, Dad. I knew you were still out there.” It’s so sweet that this is the first thing she says and that Rick gets to hear that Judith never lost her hope that Rick was alive.

gif cred: @twdfranchise

While Rick came close to ending it a few times during his years away, he managed to stay another day and then another after that and another after that, and I like to think that day by day he was somehow subconsciously being fueled by his wife and kids belief in him. They believed he was still out there and that energy helped keep him here long enough to now be back with them again.

I also love how no one ever came and took Rick’s place in his family’s life because these three Grimes were always believing Rick was still out there. Judith held onto this faith that her dad was alive even when the odds of Rick being alive seemed low. It feels like Michonne modeled that example to her of continuing to believe. And their belief was worth the wait. 🥹

And then Judith looks up at Rick and says, "I just never wanted you to feel alone.” It moves me so much that while Rick was afar hoping Judith was okay, he now gets to know that his daughter had been hoping he was okay too. 🥲

gif cred: @twdfranchise

As a big sister myself, I just gotta say Cailey plays the big sister role so well. Especially when you’re the family-oriented and responsible big sister, you always just want to make sure everyone is okay. Your younger siblings, your parents, aunts, uncles, everybody. And I love that Judith’s big thing was wanting to be sure her dad never felt alone. That’s so caring. 😭

I also feel like her saying this is her reiterating why she encouraged her mom to go after Rick. On the walkies in Michonne's last full TWD episode, Judith told Michonne, "What if he's trying to come home too, but no one will help?" And she was spot on with that prediction. In TOWL ep 3, Rick even verbalized to Michonne that he had asked for help, but he didn't get it.

So even though it made Judith really sad to be away from her mom, she knew Rick might be alone and in need of Michonne's help even more. Never wanting her dad to feel alone was among the many reasons Judith urged Michonne to go get him.

And another thing that's poetic to me is that Judith is such a pivotal character in getting Rick and Michonne to meet the way they did. Had Glenn and Maggie not gone out to the store to get Judith's formula, Michonne wouldn't have run into them and brought the formula to the prison for her future daughter. Also, even the very night Rick and Michonne became an official romantic couple in 6.10, their couch moment began with smiling over Judith on the baby monitor.

Since she was born, Judith has helped ensure her dad didn't feel alone because her very existence played a part in Rick finding his ultimate life partner and soulmate, Michonne.

So next, Rick says his first words to Judith in years when he looks at her and says, “I thought I was..."

I like that he's honest about how he did think he was alone at first. There definitely was a time when Rick was confronted with the depths of loneliness within the CRM.

gif cred: @riickgrimes

Rick continues, "Then I realized..." and I love that he looks over at Michonne as he says this. And the way Michonne holds RJ while smiling at Rick and Judith interacting again for the first time in years. 🥲

All those years in TWD, Michonne saw how much Rick loved Judith, and so it clearly means a lot to her to see Rick face to face with their daughter again. Rick and Michonne both just seem so present and grateful for this moment as parents.

gif cred: @riickgrimes

Rick looks over at Michonne, knowing how instrumental his wife was in both his daughter being who she is today and in helping him realize what he says next - "I wasn’t.” 🥹

It’s really nice to see that Rick realized he was never alone because he always had his family.

When Rick tells Judith that he realized he wasn’t alone, Judith gets to hear Rick essentially say he realized her own little mantra that she wrote on her family drawing, “My family is always with me.”

Judith and Rick both know the sadness of losing your loved ones' memory, but I’m so glad they now have each other back to affirm that while the memory can seem lost, it can always be found again.

gif cred: @andremichaux

Also the way Rick says this line with such a tender tone and tears in his eyes and then he looks at Judith with a smile and blinks probably still trying to comprehend that this little lady in front of him is the daughter he last saw as a toddler. 😭

gif cred: @alwaysthequietones

And then Judith cries again as she leans in and hugs Rick and I’m a puddle of tears inside. Like when you think about how hard Rick fought for his daughter all those years on TWD, it’s just so special to now see him get to hold her and already get a glimpse of the great loving person she’s turned out to be.

I know Judith is about to feel so loved and protected by this great dad, and I love thinking about how they’ll now get to reestablish their bond and just have the best father-daughter relationship.

It hit me that years ago, we got to see the very first time both Rick and Michonne ever held baby Judith and how it was a big moment for both of them. While she stirred up painful memories from their past, Judith was also this little bundle of hope for the future in their arms.

And then in this TOWL finale, we beautifully got to see Rick and Michonne hold Judith in their embrace one more time. 🥹

Michonne reuniting with her son and daughter and Rick reuniting with his baby girl were such golden TOWL moments.

With these touching exchanges, the Grimes Family reunions had all occurred. And now it was time for the big Grimes Family introduction. It was time for Rick to finally meet Rick. 😭

So we gotta bring it on home now and talk about the special, heartfelt, and rewarding final moment of The Ones Who Live. 🥰👌🏽

#richonne #towl #reveling in richonne #1.06 #RIR (61)#the ones who live #twd towl #michonne grimes #rick grimes #rick x michonne #twol #michonne #rick and michonne #twd: the ones who live #twd #richonnefandom

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unadulteratedsoulsweets · 1 year ago

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A DC X DP #19 Our Pharaoh, Your Duke

Imagine dis…

I kept reading about Tucker as a reincarnation of a powerful Pharoh from the Ancient civilization of Egypt and he wouldn’t stop reincarnating as long as people kept making and improving tablets. I don’t know if that is part of the canon or if that episode in DP is just another Sam and Undergrowth situation.

Anyway, just a thought is passing by…

….

Tucker was enjoying his afterlife with his spouses, Danny Phantom the High Ghost King in the Infinite Realm, and Sam Manson the heir and apprentice to the Ancient of Nature Undergrowth. All three of them were enjoying a rare day off that over-laps each other’s schedules. Tucker became the high leader also known as The Pharaoh in the Egyptian section of the Infinite Realms when the old ruler wished to pass on and when he was able to prove himself to be powerful enough to protect his section in the Realms as well as wise enough to lead them to prosperity. Add the fact that he is married to the High King and bump up other ghosts’ attitudes toward him as he is one of the official consorts of the new King.

The trio was just in a middle of a picnic when Tucker started to feel dizzy accompanied by a headache. Both of Tucker’s partners look at him with worry and concern in their eyes, as Tucker is about to reassure them that he was fine when darkness suddenly invaded his eyes.

…

Tucker is so sure that he has his reincarnation in control but the fact that he suddenly had clarity after months in the standard of his new body. Tucker felt panic fill him, A powerful entity or not every time he reincarnates, he forgets his life before and during his time in the Infinite Realms to not disrupt the normal flow of events, he only recovers his original memories when he was in the brink of death or something is need to change.

He also is worried about whatever his spouse would do as he remembered being in their presence when he was forcibly reincarnated. But by the looks of it, whoever did target him knew nothing about the complexity of the cycle thus having his memories with him along with some abilities that were muted to something more discreet. Tucker was just glad that it was him instead of his spouse.

…

As a child, Tucker no wait his new name is Duke Thomas, took it upon himself to explore this new world as it is taking his spouses a while to find him, which led him to believe that this universe may be part of a small sector of which Clockwork cannot interfere due to the delicate relationship between time and its citizens. Tucker was ecstatic when he had seen the futuristic appeal around him but felt disappointed when he had a need that only the rich and those who have connections can own them. He felt his eyes widen at the mention of aliens and other world beings and people around seemingly saving the world daily, not because of the heroes his lovely husband is an interdimensional/universal Hero and King, but because it has aliens which made him think about the opportunities of bragging rights to his husband the moment, they reunited.

When Tucker/Duke took notice of the city that his parents decided to call home, he was already thinking about his wife’s reactions will be, it seems she will either fall in love with the architecture that screams everything goth and the amount of gargoyle around each building or joins a rogue named poisoned Ivy to her crusade towards nature. It also seems that some of his powers mutated that seems to focus on his eyes, to accommodate this new universe or is it to accommodate this new body, he wondered.

As he was growing up, he began to have doubts about his so-called ordinary family as Danny’s luck rubbed them off the moment they all said I do at the altar. He just hopes that it is something he can handle future he could handle. There have been rules and laws about protecting people with power that were later named as Meta humans, he breath a sigh of relief when he saw no mention of the Infinite Realms from all data base.

…

When Bruce took him into his ward it took everything in Tucker/Duke to not scream fruit loop at the billionaire much more when he discovered a hidden base below his mansion’s basement, he doesn’t know that if Bruce is an upgrade is a degrade at the fury persona. It just never occurred to him that one day he will be a daytime vigilante like the origins of his husband. Honestly, he can’t help but have a new profound respect for his husband when he was just starting, he may be in the daytime schedule but it still took time to adjust. He also had a family of an experienced team from the start yet Danny has only him, Sam, and his sister as safety nets, he is so going to spoil Danny the moment they all saw each other.

The moment he laid eyes on Jason he can’t help but hiss quietly at his state. A liminal at the verge of hunger, no wonder his random outburst of anger kept getting worse each time he lost himself. With little to no materials that can handle the contaminated ectoplasm as well to turn it into a pure ectoplasm he was able to make a filter, yet it takes too much time to purify a liter of it yet reveals a small vial of a pure version. Yet it was better than nothing, whenever he was tasked to get them treats and coffee, he would always put the small vial of pre-ectoplasm into his drink which greatly improved his mood but unfortunately, he was the one who kept doing errands as Jason won’t drink anything else without his secret ingredient. Cass had already noticed him doing something to Jason’s drink but shrugged it off seeing that it was improving his mood, but he can’t help but feel that there is another shoe about to drop.

…

He was right, there was another shoe waiting to drop. You know, with his experience with Danny Tucker should have already known not to jinx things.

A group of archeologists found a new hidden tomb deep within Egypt and decided to go exploring yet the new guy on the job seemed to have done something and unleashed an endless number of Egyptian soldiers that seem to attack everything in sight. Though they are not killing anyone anyone who was sliced with their weapons is immediately teleported to a prison deep below the surface and forced to live a life of hard manual labor like a slave.

Tucker/Duke was shaken awake by Stephanie as the news of the Egyptian soldiers made their way to the mainland and the soil of the US. Much worse is that these soldiers found themselves at Gotham harbor and Batman is calling in every vigilante in Gotham to hold off the army while the JLD finds a way to undo the mess, every member of the magical side of the JL has already interrogated the new archeologist whether he had stolen something or he had disrespected someone in the site. Duke was pretty sure he heard Constantine grumble at the fact that this would be much easier if mind control magic is present but no, it just had to be neither of the common reason when an army of the dead raises themselves from the dead.

Now when Tucker/ Duke was wakened up after he had just gone and stayed awake for the past 14 hours straight due to an exam that his dumb professor insisted on having despite having no to little effect on one’s final grades as well as a case that needed his vigilante self his full attention, much to say he is not happy.

…

At the battleground, other members of the JL have already gone into Gotham to aid Batman and his associates while others were able to evacuate the civilians and now joining in the fight. Every person fighting is starting to feel hopeless as this Egyptian army kept coming back at them while their fighters are getting wary and tired at each wave they faced. As some of the people of the JL were about to succumb to what looked like their inevitable fate there come Signal in his yellow-clad suit and looked like he just crawled out of bed, climbed the Wayne tower with a megaphone in one hand, and proceeded to… scold the army?

Some of them blinked at the ridiculousness while some seem to pinch themselves at the absurdity of the situation. How Signal kept screaming at the undead army how his GPA and sleep is much more important than their so-called invasion to return the Ancient civilization of Egypt to its former glory. As jaws began to drop as all undead Egyptian soldiers seems to lower their heads in shame as they listen to Signal scold them for what looked like a half hour scolding before he heaved a deep breath and ordered the soldiers to go back where they came from and return the prisoners to the living world.

Just moments before each JL and JLD members try to reboot their respective minds at what had just transpired a crack was heard seemingly echoing throughout the ruins and a green portal began to form. There, two beings came through a black-haired woman with plants crawling up to her arms and legs with a wreath on top of her head and a white hair man with a crown floating above his head and a cape that looked like made out of stars dragged Signal by the arm and dragged him back to the portal. Now all heroes are scrambling to make sense of what had happened in a matter of minutes as well as trying to get back their youngest brother back, Duke may be older than Damian but he was the latest one to be adopted thus making him the youngest by their standards.

…

Back in the Infinite Realms Duke is quietly sleeping sandwiched and snuggled between the loves of his life while wearing his Pharaoh regalia he just can’t help but feel like he had just forgotten something.

Meh, he’ll tackle that after he had his full rest with both Sam and Danny’s arms and presence beside him.

…

PS: If someone out there wanted to continue or make a fic about this you are free to do so, don’t forget to tag me though.

#dc x dp #dc x dp prompt #batman #ghost king danny #duke thomas #tucker foley

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whatsk-poppinhomies · 1 year ago

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Pairing : dad!Lee Minho x F!Reader TW : childbirth ; slighty suggestive humor once ; it's just fluffy ; it's cute ; Word Count : 1.9k Request : Anonny : okay but i really like that minho pregnancy angst…. do you plan on making part 2 like the after reunited life, her parents’ response or anything? like the post natal life, the moment he held his daughter for the very first time hihi is it too much to ask??? A/N : I absolutely DO plan on making a part two and here it is!! Woohoo!!! Thank you for requesting! It's definitely not too much to ask! Also! I got so choked up writing this, it made me so happy and at the same time so sad that I don't have a man like the fictional Minho in this story!!!

“I’ll be right back, love. I’m just gonna call the guys and let them know she’s here so they won’t make my phone go off all night.” He whispered as softly as possible, not wanting to wake his daughter that he had just laid in the little cot beside your hospital bed. You hummed tiredly in response, already nestling into the pillow that definitely wasn’t as soft as the ones you had at home, but right now, after 12 hours of active labor and a slightly wonky epidural, the entire hospital bed was like laying on a cloud.

Minho couldn’t be prouder though, seeing you go through all of that, he commended every woman who had ever been in labor, and after checking the time and seeing how early in the morning it was, he made a mental reminder to call his mother and thank her for having him.

Stepping outside of the room, he leaned against the wall and took a deep breath, his throat still slightly sore from crying when he had first laid eyes on his daughter, tears of happiness streaming down his face, unable to pull his eyes away from her as the doctors carried her over to the little table to clean her up. He was grateful that he had been given a second chance, that he got to hold your hand through the entire process, that he was able to be in the room when his daughter was brought into the world, and he swore that he wouldn’t mess up and he sure as hell would never leave again.

“Minho…” His name had him finally looking around the hall, meeting eyes with your father and your mother who sat in the waiting chairs beside your door. He hadn’t seen your father since the day he had pushed the door shut against him, and while he had been meaning to meet up with your parents to apologize for the way he had been, he had just never gotten around to it. “How is our daughter and our granddaughter? Are they resting?”

Minho quickly bowed his head to your parents, acknowledging them with a quiet “Sir…” and “Ma’am”, the awkwardness felt between the two hung in the air like a thick cloud that could be felt by everyone in the vicinity. “They’re both doing great… Y/N is getting some rest right now, yes, and the baby is sleeping.” He kept his head lowered, slightly fearful of looking your dad in the eyes. “I’d like to apologize… For the way that I behaved… For hurting Y/N. I love her so much… And our daughter will take top priority over everything else.”

He finally raised his head, and when he did, he saw your father staring at him, it almost felt like he was being judged, but your mother shook her head, standing from her chair to embrace Minho in a quick hug. “Now, don’t you pay attention to him right now. He’s just grumpy because it’s past his bedtime.” She teased, and it was strange how your mothers presence and her words, much like your own, could so easily calm him down and make him feel relaxed. “I’m happy that Y/N has you, and that our granddaughter has you as her father. I know that you’ll take great care of them both. Welcome to the family.”

///

“Are you just gonna carry her around all the time?” You asked lightly as you watched Minho walk by, your daughter seemed to be in a perpetual state of being carried by him in the little sling that was across his chest. “It’s been three weeks and the only time you put her down is when you use the bathroom or when you go to bed. You’re gonna spoil her.” You warned, but you also wanted to hold your daughter as well. Hell, you even had to practically race to the nursery to be the one to get her in the middle of the night since that was the only time you actually got to hold her since being in the hospital.

“And? Our princess deserves to be spoiled, doesn’t she?” He flashed you your favorite smile before pressing a kiss to the top of her head. “Plus I go back to work next week, let me just love her a bit longer. I won’t be able to see her as much.” He was right, and you knew that he was dreading when this week was up, that’s why he stayed up so late, as if the longer he was awake it would keep the coming days at bay.

You couldn’t blame him though, you’d do the same thing. Neither of you could fully wrap your head around how fast time had gone, you couldn’t believe that it had already been three weeks since you had given birth to her. You could see it in his eyes, with each passing day he’d get sadder and sadder, and you felt the same way. The house wouldn’t be the same without him in it, and you actually grew used to the sight of him walking around the house, doing his daily activities with your daughter strapped to his chest.

“Well it’s almost her feeding time, can you at least let me hold her for fifteen minutes or so?” You posed, sitting up a little more on the couch and grabbing the little burp cloth off the side to drape over your shoulder as you got ready to have her in your arms.

“Just whip your boob out and come over here. Or I’ll bring her to your boob.” He said with a snort, and you rolled your eyes as your head fell back against the couch. “Don’t be so shy, love. I was suckin’ on ‘em before she came.” He teased, and maybe it was the fact that you were now a mom that had you growing extremely embarrassed at the mention of your sex life, but you quickly shushed him as your hands moved to cover your face which only had him laughing even more. “I’m like 99.9% sure she doesn’t know what I’m talking about. But, I’ll cover her ears if it makes you feel better.”

“Oh my gosh, shut up, Minho.” You groaned, but you couldn’t hide the fact that you were laughing as well, and the more you thought about how it would be after the week was up, the more you started to miss him already, and he hadn’t even gone back to work yet.

///

Pink balloons were tied to every single chair that was set up in the backyard. The buffet table was lined with snacks and drinks for everyone that was there, although you didn’t really anticipate so many people to show up. The grill was fired up already and Bangchan and Felix had begun making the main course for the party while everyone else kind of took turns helping you decorate and ogling at your daughter.

“Have you seen Minho?” You asked Jisung as he stepped out of the house, multiple beer cans held in both his hands and under his arms as he walked over to you. Your eyes had scanned over everyone that had filled your backyard multiple times and none of those times had your eyes landed on your husband in the crowd.

“When I came outside he was sitting on the couch. I think he was crying a bit…” Jisung said, his lips drawing together in a thin line after he had answered. This wasn’t the first time he had done it, and according to the guys, the entire week leading up to today he’d disappear during work and one of them would usually find him hiding somewhere and crying by himself.

“Right… Can you and the boys help finish setting everything up. I’m almost done… I just don’t want to leave him by himself.” Jisung nodded and you quickly scooped your daughter up, holding her on your hip as you walked into the house, and there he was. His head was lowered and you could hear the sniffles coming from where he sat. As you moved closer you could see the photo album of your daughter's first year sitting on his lap, his hands shakily flipping through the pages one by one. “Honey…” You murmured, and his head slowly raised to look at you, his eyes puffy and slightly red when they met yours.

“Sorry…” He muttered, and you shook your head at his apology, coming closer to sit on the couch beside him, your daughter propped on your lap. His finger slipped into her hand, her own tiny fingers wrapping around it as she waved his hand around, babbling loudly as she looked up at him. “When did she get so big?” He questioned with a small gasp, his head tilted as he watched her with a bittersweet smile.

You sighed softly, the sudden urge to cry taking hold of you as you looked at him. “She’s not that big yet… She’s still our baby…” You mused, trying your best to not only make him feel better, but to keep yourself from crying along with him. You glanced over at the book on his lap, scanning over the pictures on the page. “Oh, I remember that…”

His eyes followed yours and he chuckled, although it sounded more sad than usual. “Our tour in Australia and… I refused to be away from you two for a whole month… So me and the guys at the last minute begged the managers to let you both go.” Most of the pictures were of the other members holding her and in most of them she looked like she was on the verge of crying. “She was only 6 months old… It’s only been 6 months since then…” His fingers brushed over the picture of himself holding her, his smile so wide as he sat on the beach with her, his tears freely falling down his cheeks as the memory played over in his mind.

“And we have so many more months, so many years to keep making more memories with her…” You whispered, using one of your free hands to wipe the tears from his cheeks. “Like today… She only gets a first birthday once, honey. I’m sure that when she looks back at her photos, she’ll want you to be in the pictures too.”

He took a deep shaky breath, nodding his head before running his hands over his face. “Right… You’re right…” He slowly closed the book, placing it on the coffee table before grabbing your daughter off your lap and lifting her high in the air before bringing her back down and hugging her tight against his chest, eliciting a loud squeal mixed with laughter from her. “My princess is ready to party and so am I, let’s go!”

His hand held onto hers as he playfully danced his way out to the backyard, the cheers from everyone at his and your daughters appearance were loud enough to be heard in the living room where you still sat, your eyes glued to the back of your husband as he practically skipped down the stairs, innocently dodging everyone who came towards him with their arms outstretched to take the baby.

Minho was the perfect man, the perfect husband, the perfect father. There was no one else in the world that you could imagine loving you or your daughter the way he did, there was no one else in the entire universe who was everything a man should be, everything anyone would want their man to be… Minho was the most amazing, loving, devoted husband and father, and you were beyond grateful that he had come back into your life, that you had gotten a second chance with him, and more than anything, that your daughter was able to live a life with him as her father.

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highladyandromeda · 8 months ago

Text

Shadows of the Heart

Part 5

Azriel x Fem!Reader

Summary: After years apart, Y/n returns to Velaris, bearing the weight of sacrifice and secrets from her past. Reunited with Rhysand and his Inner Circle, she navigates the complexities of rekindled friendships and unresolved tensions.

WC: 3.1k

Warnings: mentions of blood, self-inflicted injury, a brief moment with unhealthy thoughts about body image (this is specifically marked with 1 star (*) at the start and 2 stars (**) at the end), unhealthy thoughts about pushing oneself too far

[Prologue], [Part 1], [Part 2], [Part 3], [Part 4]

Y/n was exhausted.

She could feel her muscles ache as she dipped deeper into the bath the house had drawn for her. The smell of tuberose and neroli drifted up from the bubbles surrounding her, the perfectly warm temperature adding to the pleasant atmosphere.

Yet she couldn’t get herself to relax a drop. Come to training, they said…it’ll be fun, they said…what liars, she thought.

Who invites an injured and recent coma patient to train, at dawn no less? Isn’t this the bloody Night Court? Y/n fumed, why do they all wake up so early now?

A glass of wine appeared by her side as if the house sensed her irritation as well.

Sighing she picked it up, and finished it immediately, a bottle appearing once she placed the glass down. She let out a laugh, wondering if she should feel offended that the house assumed her morale was so low. As if understanding her thoughts, a bottle of whiskey appeared and disappeared next to the wine, before a series of books dropped down. Judging by the titles and bits of conversation from last night, Y/n had a feeling the house was using a…tried and tested method of comforting raging females.

And speaking of rage, she was quickly losing the high of recusing Mor and returning to Velaris. Yes, she was exhilarated to see her family thriving, but the duties she had would quickly catch up to her. Counting down, it had been nearly 3 weeks since she disappeared from Vallahan and the magic tower must be getting frantic now. Not to mention, Demetrius, who’s sure to assign her so much work, that she’d not have a chance to leave the tower once she’d returned, or Ryder, who’s definitely praying that she’s dead in a ditch somewhere. Y/n knew she could use the investigation for the cult, the same cult she felt poisoned Mor, as her cover, but that excuse could only hold for so long.

Ugh. Stupid Rhys and his stupid bargains. She hoped Demetrius would receive her message fast enough, the only reason she forced herself to the training ring before sunrise. Her mediation session was a chance for her to send a holo projection to Demetrius’s office. The time-consuming aspect was not bypassing the wards of the house, which she should actually speak to Rhys about strengthening, but rather condensing her…situation and what she wanted him to do, as to expel the least amount of energy. Teleportation with blood meant her magic would take a longer time to recover. Besides, the last thing she needs is someone sensing her magical signature in the tower when she's been away for so long.

Luckily, she was able to mask her communications from the IC with her subsequent spar, which she convinced herself was necessary. It wasn’t because the moment she locked eyes with Azriel, she had this urge, this desperate desire to know what it would be like to go one-on-one with him.

No, she only offered because she knew she could last as the participant of a spar, rather than give up control for exercises or obstacles which would reveal her current weaknesses. She refused to think further on how beautifully he moved and met all her strikes, and how pretty he looked under her–No, think Vallahan, magic tower, angry masters….

Just recounting it all was giving her a headache, Y/n thought, dunking her head underneath the water. She almost wishes it could swallow her whole right there, and give her a reprieve from this.

She came back up gasping, water sloshing onto the floor.

*Y/n grabbed a towel, standing up and deciding that she might go too far should she stay in there any longer. She faced the mirror while drying herself off, looking closely at how prominent her collarbones were and how her ribs hit out. She looked away, trying to bury the simultaneous discomfort and pleasure she felt, the same as the morning when she changed into her leathers and needed to tighten them with her magic.

Y/n knew that she looked unhealthy and her magic could only take her so far if she let her body fail, but a voice at the back of her mind enjoyed the visuals, a lasting validation of her struggles. With her magic usually healing her immediately, Y/n rarely got the chance to convey her struggles, always pushing forward since it seemed the pain was never there in the first place. She briefly wondered if Azriel would understand, he seemed to know that sort of darkness, of both craving and despising it. **

Feeling a bit claustrophobic, she decided to step out onto a balcony before dinner, knowing that everyone would be there after she missed lunch. Though she could already feel her appetite disappearing at the thought of facing Amren and Nesta’s piercing gazes, not to mention Mor and Rhys’s overt concern. She raised a hand to her head, trying to rub away another impending headache before halting right at the balcony entrance.

Mother above, Y/n felt herself freeze in horror, unable to look away from the smeared and dried runes. All in blood, all in her blood. No wonder she slept for so long if she kept losing even more blood after this she thought, a cold dread settling in her bones.

Why is it still here…The thought that Rhys might hesitate to erase them, out of fear or respect, and that Amren and Nesta might see them as a curiosity to be studied, only deepened her sense of isolation. How could they not see the horror in what those runes represented?

The world began to tilt, a disorienting spiral that made her stomach churn. The vast sky above seemed to press down on her, the air growing thick and heavy, a physical force that threatened to crush her.

"Are you okay?" The concern in the question was palpable, but it only served to startle her further.

Cauldron boil me, Y/n thought, spinning around so quickly her knees gave way beneath her. But before she could fall, strong, calloused hands steadied her, the familiar touch of shadows wrapping around her with an almost protective embrace. She didn't need to see his face to know who it was—the shadows were a signature she'd come to recognize.

"Y/n, are you alright? You seem faint," the voice came again, soft and concerned, lifting her gently until she was forced to meet his eyes—hazel orbs filled with a depth of concern and understanding that momentarily stilled the chaos within her.

It was a connection, fragile and fleeting, but in that instant, Y/n realized she wasn't as alone as she had felt. The shadows that enveloped her, the hands that steadied her—they were a lifeline, pulling her back from the edge of her own darkness.

She swore time stopped for a moment before she felt the hands around her quiver, his gaze drifting to the runes behind before her actions caught up to her. It was then that reality snapped back into focus for Y/n, prompting her to instinctively step back and slip out of his gentle grasp.

In her quick withdrawal, an attempt to shield her sudden vulnerability, she missed the fleeting look of disappointment that crossed Azriel's features. Y/n hurriedly filled the silence that had grown between them.

"We shouldn't keep them waiting" she announced, her voice carrying a forced lightness that couldn't quite mask the disquiet lurking beneath. Her smile, tentative and fleeting, was an attempt to hide the depth of her unease from Azriel’s perceptive gaze.

Dinner was a silent affair, the burning stares and questions on Y/n waiting to reach the surface, especially after her display earlier that morning.

Each forkful of food echoed louder than usual until Amren, with her characteristic bluntness, pierced the quiet. "Y/n, the blood magic you used before...how did you know about it? "

Cassian, unable to resist adding to the conversation, jumped in with a grin. "Yeah, the teleportation was so cool! Are you part-witch?"

Amren's sharp glance cut him short. "She's a sorceress, you oaf. Obviously, she's mastered more than a few ancient tomes."

As Nesta voiced her curiosity, "Mastering tomes? What does that mean?" Cassian overlapped with, "How did you even find Mor?" The barrage of questions seemed to only spiral from then, with several of them wanting details on her magic and her discovery of Mor.

Amidst the several inquiries, Azriel, ever attuned to Y/n, noticed the tremble in her hands hidden under the table, a stark contrast to the calm facade she presented. His shadows stirred restlessly, a mirror to his growing concern.

Mor's complexion turned ashen as the fact dawned upon her—Y/n had ventured onto the balcony, the very place of their nightmarish ordeal. Attempts to steer the tide of questions fell on deaf ears, "Y/n, I... we didn't think..." Mor’s voice trailed off, her apologies swallowed by the growing fervor of curiosity.

Y/n took a deep breath, attempting to veil her frustration with patience, a task made increasingly difficult. They meant well, she repeated, she owed Rhys, she thought before the noise got to her. She hated being faced with curiosity and pity just as much as she hated being questioned–she had saved Mor and shown she wasn’t their enemy, wasn’t that enough?

With a huff that signaled her surrender to the inevitable, she pushed her chair back, its screech halting the interrogation, and drawing surprised glances from the table. Rising from her seat, she walked away, leaving a trail of astonishment in her wake.

Azriel reacted with swift concern, following her with a worry that mirrored the concern etched on Rhys, Mor, and even Feyre and Lucien's faces, while Cassian remained behind, a shadow of guilt tinging his features.

Y/n paused for a moment at the split between the staircase and the hallway to the balcony, debating the merits of locking herself in her room. She felt she deserved the right to scream into her pillow before rejoining them.

But the sound of footsteps behind her reminded her of the nosey nature of her friends here. If she tried to hide, there’d be no telling the lengths they’d go, she may as well just complete it now.

Upon reaching the balcony, Y/n summoned her magic, materializing a dagger in her hand. With a steady hand, she made a precise incision along her arm, her expression unflinching as crimson blossomed against her skin. She cast a fleeting glance at Azriel, her vibrant red eyes catching the light, mesmerizing him as her blood began its descent toward the magic circle below.

His shadows twitched uneasily at the sight; the others, having followed, stumbled into a collective pause, caught in a mix of awe and horror as they watched her blood reanimate the runes. Y/n commanded the runes to levitate, dripping and spinning around before she condensed them into a single, blood-diamond-like point, which then vanished within her grasp. Turning to face them with a smirk, she downplayed the gravity of her demonstration.

"See? Not a big deal," she stated, though her casual dismissal did little to ease the tension.

Azriel, moving with a purpose, reached for her, his shadows conjuring a cloth to softly wipe the blood, still dripping from her arm, away. The gentleness of his touch left Y/n taken aback, her heart skipping a beat at the care with which he wrapped her arm, his shadows having brought bandages as well. She couldn’t remember the last time someone else had treated her wounds, especially those so insignificant, so kindly.

Meeting his gaze, she was confused at his crossed expression, but before words could form, Mor enveloped her in an embrace, her apologies spilling out in a hurried flurry.

"I'm so sorry, Y/n. I should've—" Mor's voice cracked, the weight of her remorse tangible in the air between them.

"It wasn't your fault, Mor," Y/n reassured, her arms wrapping around her friend in a firm hug. "I would do it all over again for you," she whispered a vow that drew a fresh wave of tears from Mor, her embrace tightening in response.

As they finally parted, Lucien's voice cut through the momentary silence. "I must say, your control was impressive back there."

Y/n couldn't help but roll her eyes, a playful retort on her lips. "I've always been this good, Lucien. Maybe you just weren't paying attention."

His laughter echoed around them, a challenge sparking in his eyes. "Is that so? We should spar sometime then. Test out that control of yours."

Y/n pretended to be annoyed but she was grateful to him for changing the atmosphere. Lucien always knew how to put others at ease.

"Sure if you think you can keep up. Feyre, you're welcome to join his side. He'll need all the help he can get."

Rhys chimed in with feigned indignation, "And why am I excluded? My mate should be my partner."

Y/n's laughter mingled with theirs, and her spirits momentarily lifted. "Because I've beaten you too many times, Rhys. It wouldn't be fair." She teased, earning a gasp of mock indignation from him.

Their laughter was a balm, easing the tension that had settled over the dinner.

Walking back, Y/n glanced at Lucien with a mischievous twinkle in her eyes. Resting her hand lightly on his shoulder, she leaned closer, her voice laden with playful intent. "Looks like we're teaming up then" she teased.

A knowing smile danced across Lucien's lips, a silent agreement forged in the span of a heartbeat. Together, they proclaimed, "We'll scatter them like leaves in a storm!"

The statement, filled with the memory of past battles, echoed around them, their laughter a symphony of friendship and challenge.

Feyre, caught in the ripple of their amusement, couldn't help but interject with a wry smile. "Well, I guess I'm stuck with Rhys then." Her words, light and teasing, were accented with the unbreakable bond she shared with her mate, even as they prepared to face off in friendly competition.

All the while, Azriel's gaze lingered on the casual touch between Y/n and Lucien, their laughter and the seamless harmony of their declaration stirring an unfamiliar pang within him. His stare was intense and unyielding, as he watched the easy rapport they shared—a connection he found himself envying, as he stood silently on the fringes of their banter.

Azriel's desire to offer Y/n the same sense of belonging and ease was palpable, yet he chose the quiet acts that spoke volumes of his intentions. As they walked back to the dining room, he found an opportunity to express his support. With a gentle touch, he slid Y/n's chair out for her, a gesture of silent solidarity that sought to make her feel seen and valued in the way he knew best.

"Thank you," she whispered, her gratitude a soft note amidst the evening's chaos of emotions. Though her gaze briefly wandered back to Lucien, caught in a moment of quiet tension with Elain, it was Azriel's thoughtful action that anchored her.

Amren's voice drew her back. "I’m sure you created quite the spectacle, sorceress”

In response to Amren's observation, Y/n met her gaze firmly. "I don't owe anyone explanations, Amren…But out of gratitude for the welcome back," she paused, weighing her next words carefully, "I will tell you that yes, I am a sorceress. A highly ranked one, at least in Vallahan’s magic tower."

Her eyes flickered to Mor, a silent pact of trust between them. She wouldn't reveal the intricacies of their reunion—how a royal meeting had spiraled into chaos and Mor's dismissal of her warnings had nearly cost them both dearly.

"Part of my work has led me to investigate a cult revering Koschei, a dark sorcerer," Y/n continued, her voice steady despite the weight of her revelations. "It was through this that I found Mor in danger. The use of blood magic wasn't a choice made lightly. It was the only method swift and silent enough to ensure our immediate return without leaving traces of magic that could be tracked. And given Mor's poisoning, traditional portals I could open—with their elongated passage of time—weren't an option."

The table fell silent, the gravity of her words settling heavily upon them. Each member of the Inner Circle sat a little straighter, their expressions alight with a mixture of awe and deepened as she explained further about her work and magic. The dinner conversation, initially subdued, blossomed into a vibrant exchange of stories and insights.

Lucien, seizing the moment, shared his own adventures and the bond he'd formed with Vassa, expressing a hopeful desire to introduce them, perhaps as a means to unravel the curse that bound the queen.

It was then that Rhys saw an opening, his voice slicing through the conversation with a proposal for Y/n. "Y/n! This is the perfect opportunity, if you feel up to it, why don't you continue your research here?"

Before Rhys could elaborate, Mor chimed in, eager to offer the resources at their disposal. "Exactly, the House of Wind has a wealth of books that could aid in your research. I can ask the priestesses to help—"

"I can help. You." Azriel's voice, cutting through Mor's suggestion, carried an uncharacteristic nervousness. "I mean, in your research. I can help you with the research." The room fell into an unusual silence, all eyes turning to him as he attempted to clarify, "If you're conducting research, that is. I don't want to rush you, of course. You need time to recover. I'm just—uh—offering since I have experience with such investigations... not to say you need my help. I—I thought it might be... more efficient, yes..."

Azriel's voice tapered off, his gaze skirting around the table to avoid Cassian and Nesta's barely concealed smirks and Rhys's poorly disguised cough of amusement. The surprise etched on everyone else's faces spoke volumes, each one silently wondering if they had ever witnessed Azriel speak so awkwardly and at length.

"Oh, I'd appreciate the company, Azriel," Y/n finally responded, her tone warm.

"You would?" Azriel's gaze snapped to Y/n, a flicker of hope lighting his eyes, only to be momentarily dimmed by her stern look toward Rhys. "Since I'll be intruding for the foreseeable future, I might as well be productive."

"I—I wouldn't want to invade, though," Azriel hurried to add, the earnestness in his voice unmistakable.

Rhys couldn't hide a snicker, quickly masked by a sudden straightening in his chair, bouncing his right leg up.

Azriel’s shadows whispered something about a kick, but his attention was already captured by Y/n's soft smile. "I'd welcome the help," she reassured, her simple acceptance igniting a spark of anticipation in Azriel.

A/N: Hi everyone, sorry for the delay in posting this chapter, I was traveling and then dying with studies. But the plot thickens...Are we curious about Y/n's work as a sorceress? I planned out the next scenes on my flight so I should have the next few chapters up in a faster succession.

And thank you to everyone who's liked/commented/reblogged this story -- it means so much to have you all enjoy this!

For my tag list, I tagged everyone who asked and those who commented on the previous parts. If you'd like to be included, please just let me know. 💕

TAGLIST: @strangelygreat @enfppuff @trip-n-sal @inloveallthetime @annamariereads16 @mybestfriendmademe @mariahoedt @annblvd @ania-swissweet @yearninglustfully @sleepylunarwolf @quiettuba @gorlillaglue25 @lilah-asteria @naturakaashi @sillymercury @itsswritten @xlosttdreamss @kennedy-brooke @xyzmeh @lucky7rosie @copenhagenspirit @collide-with-the-music @starsinyourseyes @dianxiaxiexie @maybefoxysouls @golden-canyon @violet-potter @thisiskaylin @acphengene @katherinejess @sevikas-whore @kalulakunundrum @hibye02 @madscamp02 @willowpains @jaybarding @kalulakunundrum @sevikas-whore @katherinejess @acphengene @thisiskaylin

#azriel x reader #azriel shadowsinger #azriel au #azriel x y/n #acotar series #acotar #acomaf #acowar #azriel x oc #rhysand #morrigan #acotar fanfiction #azriel acotar #lucien vanserra

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chefkids · 5 months ago

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As much as I love sydcarmy, I really don’t think they’re going to become romantic. Especially after this season. If Storer really only planned for 3 seasons and had to split it into half, it doesn’t make sense. The show doesn’t have enough episodes to really develop them to where both realize their feelings (if they’re really there) and then be in a place to get together in a way that it doesn’t feel rushed

I don't think Storers big plan for this series is to leave Carmy in a miserable lonely place.

This season already set up a few things with Claire. Mainly that she does not seem interested in getting back together with him. She's a pushy person, she was not afraid to push him to be with her once. If she really wanted to she would have pushed again and talked to him to get him to apologize and be with her again just how she forced him to apologize on the phone for giving her a fake number. I think she's hurt he hasn't talked to her at all or apologized, but she does not want to be with him again. She told Tiff he basically said he would blame her if anything went wrong in his life. Which is really not what Carmy meant, and I think that will be part of their fight when he does apologize to her. She also told the Faks "it's done." when they were saying she's the peace and that he loves her and that she should get back with him to "take care of him because no one else does". I don't think she wants to be with him again and has accepted they shouldn't be together, and I think that will be the end of their relationship once he apologizes to her. I do not think Storer plans on making Claire his emotional caretaker. And the same goes for Syd. She's not his babysitter either.

She's running out of time to decide on her partnership offers. Which I think will be address right at the start of the next season and will be the turning point for Carmy to get his shit together.

This story is about family and found family, they have made that very clear and it has always remained true though out all the season. Sydney is stuck because she doesn't want to leave her found family, but Carmy is a toxic family member. Carmy left his family because of his toxic mother, but we've seen how Nat and her were able to rebuild their trust and come back to each other. Jimmy told him his mom wants to speak to him. He knows he's been avoiding her, but he will see her again, even if he doesn't fully forgive her for what has happened between them, I think Donna and Carmy will be on an okay place even if they don't stay close and speaking with each other. Which I think also mirrors Storer's relationship with his own mom that he has talked about.

We already know next half will be all about him rebuilding his broken relationships with everyone by apologizing to Claire and getting closure, fixing things with Richie, and reuniting with his mother. There has been evidence for all of these. And I'm sure finally fixing things with Sydney in the end will also be a part on the next season.

I think she will make moves to leave and tell him about the offer, and I think she will likely develop some sort of relationship with Luca. But we also know that he comes with an expiration date, he's only here for a few months. That was the set up, while Carmy was not paying attention to Sydney, she was getting scooped up professionally and personally. I really don't think her and Luca will work out long term. But I'm still uncertain about Sydney leaving The Bear. We know Jimmy was going to cut them off if they got a bad review, which is apparently what they got, and I think that might actually happen. I could still see The Bear closing next season and everyone going their own ways professionally, but remaining a family at heart.

That conversation about Legacy and family trees Carmy had with Marcus really seemed to me to foreshadow Sydney starting her own place and taking bits of The Bear with her and also Marcus perhaps starting his own place or going somewhere else. Carmy said he wants to leave behind something "panickless and anxiety free" and I do think he will get there in the end, but I think that might involve closing The Bear or at the very least him stepping away from it and handing the reins to Sydney. I think there was a lot of emphasis on his drawings especially from Chef Terry, and I think that will still play a role in his future and him pursuing his passions which might be beyond cooking.

I do not think this is all going to end on a sad and miserable note. If this part's theme was about funerals, Marcus's mom and Ever. The next will be about weddings. We know Tiff and Frank's wedding is coming. A big theme for Richie was the idea of him being alone/lonely. He's also very clearly starting something with Jess and I think that will continue in the next part. I think Syd and Carmy's "partnership", be it professional or romantic, working out will also be a part of these "weddings".

I don't think Storer is as stupid and oblivious as we sometimes think he is. He knows that Syd and Carmy have a crazy transcendental celestial bond that Claire and Carmy don't. He knew the implications of the Season 2 panic attack. As much as Season 3 felt like retcon to justify Claire and Carmy being true loved or something, he still doubled down on Syd and Carmy's invisible string, on her being his muse, and on her being his actual peace in panic attacks despite any lies Carmy tries to tells himself about it being Claire.

I think they will unambiguously break the platonic allegations by the end of the series. Will they have the guts to show us their relationship and partnership outside of the kitchen in the show beyond just them getting together at the last minute? Unsure.

I think he probably intended on ending the series with Syd and Carmy getting together at the last second. Especially if you consider John Hughes' Some Kind of Wonderful, which I do think inspired his Claire/Carmy/Syd dynamic, ended with them getting together and kissing right before the screen turns black. Which would honestly be a lame cop out and really quite offensive to Syd to not show their full partnership in motion after giving so much screen time to Claire/Carmy's romantic life and would only feed the people that will claim it's fanservice to end with sydcarmy.

I think that's what the ambiguity of there being a Season 5 or not is. We know the studios want it, sydcarmy is making them a lot of noise and a huge subset of people would love to actually see it play out on screen for more than 10 minutes at the series finale, but does Storer want to actually make a season about more than Carmy being miserable and show that people can heal and exist in a functioning relationships and a functioning kitchen and still be funny and exciting and entertaining? Who knows.

#the bear #the bear season 4 #sydcarmy

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maybege · 10 days ago

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What Happens in Vegas, Stays in Vegas - FBI 12

Summary: A team night in Vegas forces you to make some decisions.

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x fem!Reader

Wordcount: 2.5k | Rating: E (18+ only!)

Warnings: alcohol consumption, hopeless yearning but what’s new

We are so back! Parts 13 + 14 are finished and 15 is on its way there so I am hoping to sustain a monthly posting schedule into the new year. This is a classic filler chapter because the filler episodes are always the ones I loved the most. Other than that, we are picking up in speed and tension in the next few parts. Let me know what you think, your comments are the fuel for the creative engine!

masterlist | crossposted on AO3

Considering the kind of work you did, it was weird to speak about “favourite” case types. But you would be lying if you said that reuniting children with their families was not something that made your heart feel full every time. Like you were proven that the sacrifices this job demanded were always – always – worth it in the end. That they served a purpose.

But no matter how much joy it brought to see little Ryan reunited with his mother after his father suffered a psychotic break, the lack of sleep made you feel like you could sleep for 72 hours straight. Especially since you had been on three back-to-back cases and your phone was filled with voicemails from your mother.

Hotch’s announcement that you would stay in Vegas for the night then came as a welcome distraction to the entire team.

“I am going to take the longest shower the state of Nevada has ever seen,” Garcia announced in the car on your way back to the hotel and you grinned, agreeing with her in your mind.

“I've never actually been to Vegas,” you admitted to JJ who was sitting in the backseat next to you, “Do you guys, like, do you go out or what’s the plan? It sounds like you have a routine going on.”

“The best routine, sweetheart,” Morgan announced from where he was driving. His smiling eyes met yours in the rear-view mirror, “And I think it will probably start with you getting that shower you mentioned.”

“Let’s do shots! Shots sound like a good idea!”

“Everything sounds like a good idea in Las Vegas,” JJ argued but she did not protest when Emily waved down the waiter.

Three rounds later you were pleasantly buzzed, precariously balancing in your heels as you wandered along the Caesars Mall in a dress that might as well double for a mirror ball. Getting ready with Penelope Garcia had been the most chaotic, wholesome and validating experience of your life and you had left the hotel room feeling beautiful and ready to – in Garcia’s words – conquer the night.

One thing you hadn’t anticipated though was that conquering the night in Las Vegas meant walking. Lots and lots of walking.

The fake cobbled stone made your feet unsteady and you giggled, hooking your arm through Emily’s without another thought. You felt her tense up next to you and looked up, wondering if maybe you had crossed a line. Only it wasn’t Emily who looked back at you.

It was Hotch.

Fear and shock made your eyes widen and you suddenly became very aware of just how close you were to him. How overt this show of affection could be read and how inappropriate you were being considering this was your boss.

Shit shit shit shit.

Your brain immediately went into crisis-solving mode and the first step was crystal clear: Get your hands off your (very attractive) boss.

But then his hand landed on yours, keeping your arm around his and you tried to hide your surprise with a wide smile.

“Let’s go get something to eat!” Rossi announced, well aware that no one on the team would ever deny the idea of food, “I have an old friend who owns a restaurant here. I am sure he would be able to get us a table.”

After everybody showed sufficient amounts of enthusiasm for his plan, the group made their way to the other end of the mall. Which should not be as big of a deal as it was but cobblestones were not your friend today.

“A bit shaky there, hm?” Hotch mumbled when you took a careful step down a small step of stairs, a smirk on his lips that made you feel warm all over, “Should I start to call you Bambi?”

“Don’t know what you’re talking about,” you huffed, tightening your hold on his arm nonetheless, “I am perfectly fine.”

“You sure you don’t need to be going back to the hotel?” he checked with you but did not sound too concerned when his hand wrapped around yours, guiding you down the last step and following the group.

“No way, sir,” you shook your head, “A night out with the entire team in Vegas? I am not going to miss it for the world.”

His large hand squeezed yours slightly and you saw the soft smile on his lips that made your heart flutter in your chest like a hoard of butterflies. You were both silent as you followed Rossi’s lead and you allowed yourself to take in the atmosphere.

The dim lighting and cool air really did make it feel like you were strolling through some Italian streets at twilight if it weren’t for the several high-end stores that were neatly lined together. But as you crossed the threshold to the casino part of the hotel, the carpeted floor did little to dim the noise of the hundreds of partygoers flocking around the cocktail bars, poker tables and slot machines.

Rossi was right about his friend having a table for your group and before you knew it, you were sipping on a glass of white wine and munching on the most delicious bruschetta you had ever tasted.

“Rossi, have I ever told you you're my favourite?” Derek joked, his mouth still working on the bite of pasta he had just taken.

“Hey!” Garcia exclaimed, delivering a slap to his upper arm, “Don’t bite the hand that feeds you important information no other hacker could provide.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it, baby girl,” he grinned, playfully snapping his teeth at her. Everybody laughed at their antics and you tried to ignore how a particular set of laughter made your thighs clench.

Get your act together, girl.

The dinner was fun, really, and you found that you could not get enough of spending time with the team. There was so much affection, kindness and hilarious banter between them, it reminded you of the found families you studied in your literature courses.

Maybe the BAU was one of those cases in real life.

No one could ever tell you it wasn’t affection that made Rossi order different pasta dishes for everyone at the table or that caused Reid to explain the surface ratio of different pasta types or that had Emily and JJ order not one but two bottles of the house-recommended wine. It was affection that had Garcia put her head on your shoulder when she was drowsy after dinner and it was affection that twinkled in Hotch’s eyes when he asked you if you’d like a dessert.

“I would never say no to some panna cotta,” you spoke truthfully, “Wanna share?”

He stood up, throwing you a smile. “I will get some from the counter up front.”

To avoid looking at him leave (and the formidable form he was making in that dark suit), you pulled out your phone. You never really got to check it while on a case, so your social media feeds were usually full of new stuff you got to scroll through before you came home. You watched Josh post about some dinners and spotted the @thefabulousamber tag that appeared several times in his stories. And there was John posting some pictures about a run along the river and your school friends, all reuniting back home.

“Interesting,” a deep voice rumbled behind you, “tell me, what exactly are we looking at?”

You turned in your chair, spotting Hotch. He was standing behind you, leaning down to watch what you wanted to show him on your phone and your breath hitched in your throat as you felt his lips ghost over your ear. He was so close. His hands landed on the table in front of you, effectively caging you in and yet you made no move to shy away from him.

“It’s a cat video,” you said to him with a smile, “look how cute it is!”

“Very cute indeed,” he smiled, looking down at you, “Do you have any cats at home?”

“I wish,” you sighed, “but Josh is allergic and I don’t know if I can justify getting a cat when I am gone all the time.”

“Sounds like you are not really settled.”

“Huh?”

“You’re the newest member of our team and are not from here. A pet usually symbolizes a commitment to one’s current life aside from romantic or platonic relationships.”

“You don’t have any pets.”

“I have a child,” he reminded you before you both burst into laughter at the sight of Reid trying to juggle six different wine corks.

It wasn’t even five hours later that your alarm blared in your ears and Garcia – where had she even come from? And especially when? – stirred next to you.

“Five more minutes,” she grumbled, mistakenly patting on your legs in search of her glasses, “Please.”

You squinted your eyes at the display of your phone, trying to ignore the stale taste in your mouth. “I don’t think we have five more minutes,” you stated, forcing yourself out of bed. Why was everything turning?

Oh no, that was you.

You landed with a thud on your knees, the vibration travelling from your joints to your head and you groaned. “I will never drink again,” you muttered. Pressing your hands to your closed eyes, somehow dulled the throbbing in your head.

Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out.

You could do this. One step at a time. Time … What was it about time that was so important?

Your head shot up, “We need to leave in like 30 minutes.”

“Oh shit,” you could hear the rustling of the bed sheets as Penelope rolled alone, unsteadily landing on her feet, still wearing her yellow tights from the night before, “Let’s go, bestie, we have bags to pack!”

No training in the world could have prepared you for packing your bags, brushing your teeth and downing three glasses of water within 25 minutes. By the time you had made it down to the lobby and into the cars, you were convinced others could hear your head pound which was why Emily offered you the painkiller before popping one in herself.

All in all, it seemed the entire team was a little worse for wear as you filed into the plane.

All except for one.

“You know the German word for hangover Kater translates into cat but actually it comes from the Old-Greek Katarhh which means to have a cold and was commonly used by 19th century philosophy students after indulging too much.”

“Oh, shut up, Reid,” you groaned, “You drank just as much. How can your head still be this functional?”

As soon as the words left your mouth, you felt bad. Spencer looked at you like a kicked puppy and you sighed. “I’m sorry,” you apologized, reaching out your hand to pat his knee where he was sitting opposite you, “That was uncalled for.”

The leather of the seat next to you creaked and even with your headache, you recognized the shape and warmth of your boss instantly. His upper arm brushed against yours, the fabric of his suit jacket warming against your bare skin.

Your heart skipped a beat at seeing the smile on his lips. Aaron Hotchner, for just the barest of seconds, looked genuinely happy like this and you wondered what he was thinking, what he was seeing. Whether he listened to how Rossi kept talking about some pasta dish you’d never heard of, hands gesturing as he talked to Garcia, or if he was watching Reid and JJ trading plane reads or watching Emily try and get a hold of her cat sitter.

“I’ve heard water is supposed to help.”

You flinched when his voice sounded much too close to your ear, his breath washing down the side of your neck and making you dream of scenarios where his mouth was so close to your neck for other reasons.

“Don’t scream at me,” you mumbled, holding your forehead. There was an uncharacteristic grin on his face that made you want to squint your eyes at him. He seemed so … bright.

“I gather it’s been a long night?”

“Do not come between Penelope Garcia and a bottle of tequila,” you muttered,” just don’t.”

“I could say the same about Rossi and a good whiskey.”

“You don’t look as if you had that long of a night.”

“I drank my water,” he teased, closing the file in front of him, “And admittedly a few more years of practice are worth everything when you drink with either of them.”

“I don’t doubt that,” you hummed, leaning back against the soft seat, “at least we have our own private jet. Thank God for the American taxpayer.”

Hotch didn’t say anything but when you opened your eyes again he was looking at you – and smiling. Aaron Hotchner was smiling at you. You felt the blood rush into your face and you tried to sit up a little straighter, a wave of nausea crashing over you and you whimpered. You’d never ever drink after a case with her again. How did Derek survive until now?

“Here,” you opened your eyes to the sight of a thick hand pushing a glass of water to you on the table, “Drink some more.”

You hid your smile against the rim of the glass.

Maybe everything would change for the better now.

Six days later, though, your happiness was shattered into a thousand pieces. Apparently, Aaron Hotchner took What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas literally. Because not only did he act like your flirtation (if you could even call it that) never happened – which was something you had expected all along – but he also acted as if your friendship did not exist.

You were not sure what hurt worse: the fact that you allowed yourself to dream about what this could mean or the fact that he seemed so unaffected by pretending things had never changed from three months ago.

You found yourself floating into the office each morning with a smile, hoping that maybe he was just in a bad mood. That his little comments would start again. That he would correct you when you called him Sir. And each evening, you found yourself sitting at your desk, shoulders falling inwards as you started your way home with a feeling of dread in your belly.

It was not long before the doubt crept back in. Did something happen that made him think you were unworthy, not necessarily of this job, but of him? And why did it matter to you anyway? Yes, he was a good-looking (very good-looking) man whose voice sent shivers down your spine and who made more than one appearance in your dreams, sure. But that did not mean you deserved to let the whims of course crush dictate the way your day was going.

Or your job, for that matter.

Either way, it was absolute bullshit and after another day during which he simply passed your desk without so much as a “Good morning” you found yourself googling flights to Idaho and dialling a number you knew by heart since the age of five.

“Hi, hun,” your mother greeted you on the side of the phone, “How are you doing?”

“Hi Mom,” you mumbled as you clicked on the first available flight, “About that visit we were talking about … how soon can I come?”

#maybege writes #aaron hotchner x reader

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poppadom0912 · 1 month ago

Note

HUUUGE congrats on the 1k!!! You really deserve it ❤️

If possible, I would like to order a 🍮 Jay Halstead + And They Were Roommates trope?

A/N: thank you so much for ordering. I hope it’s to your liking. Please enjoy!!

🍮🍮🍮🍮🍮

Your current living situation was partly out of your control, and it was partly your own fault. You couldn’t blame anyone but yourself to be honest.

Long story short, med school had made you gone broke and your rocky relationship with your family only made your financial hardships even worse.

So when it came to moving closer to your aunt who said she could house you, you weren’t expecting to be reunited with a boy from your past.

Well, not a boy anymore. Jay Halstead was a fully grown man who was somehow fully functioning and had a full-time job. Coincidentally, he too had just moved back to Chicago and was looking for a new home.

So, when you shared your own housing struggles, he was very generous in his offer to move in with him. And it was a very tempting offer as here you were three years later, living in an apartment with the aforementioned man.

A lot of the time, both of you were swamped with work. You were finishing off your residency in trauma surgery and he was just getting comfortable with his new team.

Over the course of three years, both of you were able to reconnect and your childhood acquaintance had now become one of your closest friends. After hard days at work, it was easy to come home and be comfortable, knowing that you could relax and no matter what happened to you, he remained a constant.

Your roommate. That’s what he was and no matter all the teasing you got from your friends, that’s what he was going to remain.

🍮🍮🍮🍮🍮

It was a very busy day at work. It seemed that it might’ve been a full moon because not only was the emergency department filled to the brim, but these accidents were ridiculous and almost unbelievable.

You had been in back-to-back surgeries, barely anytime to yourself before the next patient came rushing in. And unfortunately for the ED, the accidents weren’t stopping soon and now the police were getting involved.

If you saw Jay in passing, rushing to the surgery theatre, then that was a problem for later to figure out if he was working or if he was laying on a gurney half dead.

Two hours later you had your answer. The brunet was in deep discussion with his brother when you finished surgery, and the ED had finally calmed down.

With slumped shoulders, you dragged your feet towards the brothers.

“Hey, how was the surgery?” Will asked. The patient you operated on had initially been his on intake.

“She’s all good. The internal bleeding wasn’t as bad as we thought.” You replied, a tired smile on your face before you turned to the other man.

“What brings you here trouble?” You asked, amusement laced in your words.

Jay rolled his eyes, but you knew it wasn’t true by the smirk on his lips. “Making sure you don’t make a mess like you did this morning.”

You gasped in faux hurt, hand clutching your chest at the accusation and audacity. “Excuse you, I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Sureeee.” Jay dragged out, nodding as he sarcastically retorted back.

“No, I won't have this.” You said, scoffing. “Who was the one who cleaned up everything last night after a long shift because someone got called in to work and left the entire apartment in a mess.”

You continued on, proudly naming the messes he made, unaware of how he was looking at you.

“Ugh, how dare you. I’m finishing the last portion of pasta. You can make your own dinner.” You finished after nearly seven minutes, a satisfied smile on your face as you ‘won.’

Without waiting to hear his reply, you walked away, a pep in your step.

“Ew, jay please get a grip.” Will complained when you left, his face screwing up in disgust at the look on his brother's face.

“Reese, on behalf of both of them, I am so sorry you had to see that.” Will apologised to the younger woman who had been there the entire time, her face stuck in its shock at the encounter she just witnessed.

“Why are they?” Reese asked, frozen and unable to finish her sentence.

“They’re roommates Reese.” Will nodded, his face solemn. He had been a witness to this tragic pair for way too long now.

“Just roommates… nothing more?” She asked in disbelief, her eyes stuck on the detective who was still looking at you longingly from afar. If she didn’t know any better, shed call him a creep but this, she had to admit, was kinda cute.

“Unfortunately, they’re just roommates.”

🍮🍮🍮🍮🍮

Your cheeks were hurting from just how much you were laughing. Anymore and you’d have a stomach-ache.

At the sight of Will standing up from besides Jay, you could only fear the worst. Right now, anything could happen.

“I’ve known Y/N for nearly as long as I’ve known Jay. Her mum was close with ours and so we all grew up together and when they both went their own ways after school, no one ever thought they would meet again, let alone move in together.”

“And so, they were roommates.” Will continued, a nostalgic smile on his face as he turned to look at the pair that had caused him so much strife. “Being roommates is what started this relationship and is what caused all of us a lot of grief but after all of our efforts, they finally made it.”

“I’m sure these idiots would’ve made it without out intervention, even if it would’ve taken another three years but Jay’s been embarrassed enough so I won’t say anything more.”

Will held up his glass, “Here’s to the happy couple and to the rest of their lives being roommates.”

Everyone cheered.

#one chicago x reader #one chicago imagine #one chicago fic #jay halstead x reader #chicago med #chicago pd #jay halstead #jay halstead oneshot #jay halstead imagine

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no-psi-nan · 9 months ago

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Saiki's life if this character wasn't in it:

Nendo: Hell on earth, canonically (according to the light novels). Saiki series gets canceled, leading to Saiki rampaging out of control. All of Saiki's classmates also end up twisted.

Kaido: Might not have reunited that little girl with her dog, which led to an important friendship lesson. Saiki x Nendo rumors would be stronger since now they'd seem like a couple instead of a friend trio. Uhhh... Saiki would've been forced to attend that party they were late to... Saiki might have had to visibly intervene the 2 times Yumehara was in trouble, which would have left her still crushing on him and causing a rivalry between her and Teruhashi.

Yumehara: Teruhashi seems to go evil in every universe where Yumehara is not around or is not her friend, so even though she doesn't do too much to Saiki directly, an untamed Teruhashi would be causing LOTS of problems. Also she's the one who lead to all of Saiki's friends vacationing at the foot of the volcano so that would've been a problem avoided lol.

Hairo: A lot less sports shenanigans to be sure. The armed robbery probably would've been successful. Saiki's summer schedule would have also remained pretty empty that one year lol.

Teruhashi: Honestly this would immediately eliminate like 50% of Saiki's problems. No Teruhashi, no Kokomins, no Saiko, no Makoto, and Imu would not be a problem for him either. Deserted island arc avoided too. However, Yumehara never falls for Kaido and the Occult Club fails to launch, so no Yumehara + Arisu friendship. Saiki would've gotten to watch that movie, which might have left him more comfortable wearing the germanium ring sometimes. 🤔 Maybe him missing an important thought could have caused a problem eventually??

Mera: Makoto would have been on the plane to the Okinawa trip so maybe Saiki would've let it stay grounded instead of fighting the storm hsfjdlshfks. Café Mami would've closed probably, which might have had more repercussions since Saiki goes there often. No clinical trial episode. Saiki might've not grown to trust Aiura as much if they didn't fix the Mr. Mera situation together.

Kuboyasu: Saiki might have had to reveal his powers to Kaido 🤔 He only let the bullies approach at all because of Kaido's thoughts about liars, which were spurred by Kuboyasu though. Possibly Kaido would have had this thought process eventually anyways, which would then make Saiki stop being his friend and reject future friendships even more.

Toritsuka: Would Saiki have been able to defeat the robot clone without Toritsuka's help? Would Saiki have been able to win the cat tank episode without any help, especially if the Toritsuka fight had been replaced with a family member as hostage or something? Who would've pretended to be Saiki during the volcano arc? Also Toritsuka told Saiki about the Hii situation before anyone got killed and was the one who solved Hii's problem permanently(?) so if Toritsuka hadn't helped then there probably would've been a lot more Hii problems for Saiki to solve.

Kusuke: Well, Saiki would be an only child with no limiters and powers growing out of control... Would he have been able to eventually learn to control his powers without the interference of the limiters? Or might have he been driven mad by it, or fled the planet to escape all the noise?? Truly hard to say...

Saiko: Deserted island arc avoided as well as the Saiko manor Kokomin siege. Volcano situation wouldn't have needed a redo, though the lack of hotel room might've caused other problems. No changes to the bathroom at PK Academy.

Aiura: Saiki is stuck in high school forever, since it took 10 clones, the original Saiki, and Aiura's perfect predictions to stop the eruption. Also Yumehara probably would have died when after getting that death mark since she and Saiki would've been at their respective homes at the time it activated. Oh, and the train crash would have happened as well. Saiki probably would've blamed himself for these deaths and/or would've had to do time leaps to fix them, if possible. Actually it's unknown whether Saiki can defeat death marks without knowing about them / without Aiura's intervention. The fortune telling customer would've died too but that wouldn't have been Saiki's problem. That one guy wouldn't have found his soulmate in Africa probably 🥺

Satou: Well there would be less light in Saiki's life. Also Saiki would've had to spend a lot of time interfering with Hii's situation, which could have possibly gotten Saiki killed eventually, since he did get a death mark dealing with her.

Imu: No Teruhashi mixer scene or forcing Teruhashi to acknowledge her feelings. None of that really affects Saiki's life though tbh?

Akechi: Less trauma probably. However, his example of what a good and fun game can be also led Kusuo to reconciliation with his brother, which meant that Kusuke helped with the volcano. 🤔 Hard to say whether it would be a net positive or not!

Hii: Ok, she's pretty much caused nothing but problems and was only around for like 2 episodes. No relationship chain diagram though, and that was peak comedy!

👇🏾 Lmk if I missed anything in the notes or reblogs!

#saiki k #saiki no psi nan #sknpn #the disastrous life of saiki k.#tdlosk #nopsi meta

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pixiecactus · 9 days ago

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so in that fandom confessions post, of how people that like sansa and elia tend to depict lyanna and arya as wild and ugly when it's a canon fact that both of them were considered pretty.

there's a stansa claiming that they have never seen any elia or sansa stan do this. and i remember that old saying that goes "no hay peor ciego que el que no quiere ver" (sorry for not putting a translation, but i think that i'm pretty done with posting altogether, and i really hate this time of the year, so i couldn't care less right now)

so i went through their blog to see what content they reblog, and i find it so interesting how this is one of the tags they wrote.

i can only talk for myself, as someone who doesn't like sansa that much (i really appreciate that later on in the books we don't see her judging other girls or women for being sexually active; look at her go! she's growing and learning to be more accepting; i'm a little bit impressed)... actually i think it has come a time in my life where i really pity the girl for the fandom that she has; they don't like her canon personality, and they only use her as a vessel to project themselves into a "pretty, young, and naive maid" archetype in a fantasy setting.

but i want arya and sansa to reunite; actually, i even see them sharing a desperate hug because they need to confirm that the other one is real by touching them.

where the problem lies for me is people trying to erase the fact that arya and sansa don't have a good relationship. and meanwhile, i agree that arya loves her sister, because (i can't stress enough this next part) family is one of the most important things for arya. i can't say the same thing about sansa, for this girl, the most important thing is herself, and she doesn't like arya, simply as that, because her little sister dares to rebel and not conform to what is expected of her because she was born a girl.

sansa can't connect to arya at all because she doesn't understand her; and instead of coming to terms with this fact, sansa wishes that arya was different and then later on when sansa thinks that arya is already dead, she thinks that

"arya had been entirely unsatisfactory as sisters went" (copy it up and google it, if you don't believe me, this is actually a book quote coming from sansa's pov)

let's add to the fact that sansa is one of the stark's golden children. sansa is praised all the time around by pretty much everyone. don't you think that sansa seeing this and seeing arya be reprimanded at the same time couldn't translate into sansa being entitled and holding the belief that she's always in the right and arya is a disgrace to all of her family?

they can bring that part, in which sansa prays for all of her family (arya included) all they want, but as someone who grew up catholic, when i was a little girl, i used to pray for people who i almost never interacted with, like my neighbors, and even the ones that i didn't like, because i was taught that was the way to be "a proper little girl under the eyes of god", so as a person with that past experience behind me, i'm simply not convinced of this act being significant enough.

i have major problems with sansa dreaming about having a daughter that looks just like arya too, because i can't get out of my head the thought of if this were to actually happen and sansa has a girl that looks like the girl's aunt, every time that child misbehaves or fails any of her duties... i can see sansa resenting arya even more, because sansa would blame arya for her daughter being this way.

i do really want them to reunite (hopefully this reunion is one of the last ones to happen because i want arya to be around people that had always loved her, you know, like jon and bran and even rickon) but sansa has not matured enough to be able to recognize that she hurt her little sister badly, and i'm pretty sure she could (and would) hurt her again easily, because she had so little growth as a person. so what it comes down to is that i don't trust sansa to be around arya.

and i'm so scared of the possibility of arya forgiving her sister way too easily because sansa hasn't shown almost any remorse for the things she said to arya. and let me be clear: in any way, shape, or form, arya never did anything to deserve to be treated this way. arya always deserved better from her older sister. and arya doesn't owe sansa any kind of forgiveness just because "they're the sun and the moon."

with that particular rant from me over and done. i saw this reblogged in their blog as speculation for arya in the future.

and this next type of posts are the things they reblog for arya.

and i'm going to let those posts and tags speak for themselves.

like this person is a stansa, a jonsa, a "stark sisters" stan, a dany anti and a green stan... like "girl (gender neutral), pick a struggle for real"

#well look at me go iirc my first post was in december last year so i didn't even make it past one year... what a pathetic loser right?#well i think that old saying comes from the bible actually #if that is correct #wow second biggest disappointment after learning that “love is patient love is kind” comes from that book too #a song of ice and fire #asoiaf #house stark #arya stark #anti sansa stans

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cobaltperun · 11 months ago

Text

Lost (3) - Stay

Tara Carpenter x female Reader

Summary: To anyone on the outside, and to Tara’s friends, you were Tara’s fierce protector, the MMA fighter who’d take anyone on for Tara. The Guard Dog, as Amber called you. You had no idea you’d have to protect her from people who claimed they loved her. It didn’t matter. As long as you and Tara had one another there was nothing you wouldn’t be able to survive.

Story warnings: Scream violence, family issues, trauma, angst, certain sensitive topics

Word count: 6.4k

Story Masterlist / First part / Previous part / Next part

-I've never been the best at letting go, I don't wanna spend the night alone-

Sam was… afraid, frightened even. She never wanted to go back to Woodsboro, to go back to the place that reminded her of all the things she ruined, of all the things that ruined her. And now those things threatened her baby sister, her Tara, the only good in her life she had left, no matter the distance between them. More than the ghosts and memories though, Sam was afraid of Tara’s reaction, she was afraid, yet accepting of rejection. If anyone had the right to hold her accountable, it was Tara. She was the only one who could be her judge, and Sam would accept it. She would accept it because it was the only right reaction, after all Sam wasn’t the first family member that abandoned Tara, and given how their mother was, well, that only made Sam’s choice worse. She didn’t just leave Tara behind, she left her with their mother.

Her reason didn’t matter, her regrets, pain, how much she missed Tara every single moment, none of it mattered. She left. She left Tara to protect her, but she left nonetheless, cutting contact and leaving Tara, almost certainly, with trauma and doubt.

How she wished she could reunite with Tara in a different place, in different circumstances, ones that didn’t involve Tara being hurt, Tara nearly dying. How she wished she could take those wounds and pain away from Tara and go through what Tara did instead. She lost count a long time ago, of all the dreams that had Tara and her reuniting, as unrealistic as they were. Tara, the same as she was when Sam left, when she was merely thirteen years old, with her shy smile and hiding her eyes behind her bangs.

“You’re worried about your sister,” Richie interrupted her thoughts, and she was thankful for that, she was already worried as it was, and thinking about Tara’s reaction wasn’t helping her.

So, she nodded, sighing and looking out the window. It’s been a while since they saw a building of any kind, all they could see were trees, the forest surrounding the road. They were getting closer to Woodsboro. It wouldn’t be long now.

“Hey, isn’t that MMA fighter you like watching from Woodsboro as well?” he suddenly asked and it slipped her mind that she never knew he noticed that.

Sam smiled a bit, despite circumstances, as she did, indeed, watch the last couple of your matches. She saw an edit of your fight, of you weaving and dodging the attacks and countering your opponent with ease. And she immediately recognized you, even before she read your name in the description. So, ever since then, she silently followed your fights, happy that you were accomplishing your dream, and, though she never admitted it to anyone but herself, hoping to catch a glimpse of Tara in the crowd.

“Mhm, Y/N. She’s Tara’s childhood friend,” she replied without a hint of doubt.

“Is? I thought you said you didn’t talk to your sister in years. How do you know they’re still friends?” Richie’s question was valid, and Sam really didn’t know if you and Tara were still friends.

But…

“You don’t know them. Nothing could break the bond Tara and Y/N have,” you were Tara’s best friend, and Tara was the one that made you the happiest. Sure, years could have made the two of you grow distant, but she couldn’t imagine it, she found it inconceivable. Tara not having you by her side? Sam couldn’t even begin to imagine what could have gone wrong for that to happen.

Amber may have given you the Guard Dog nickname, but Sam always preferred to think of you as Tara’s protector, as Tara’s unbreakable shield, even if she figured the guard dog was appropriate as well. Sam would have left Woodsboro either way, to protect Tara, but knowing Tara would still have you made her feel better.

~X~

If you weren’t so focused on Tara, you probably would have thought Amber was right for once. You really looked like a guard dog at the moment. Standing to Tara’s left, leaning against the wall with your arms folded over your chest and a scowl on your face as you listened to Tara speaking with her mother.

“No, nothing was taken,” you froze when you heard the defeated tone of Tara’s voice. Once, just this once you thought her damn mother wouldn’t be a contender for the worst parent you had ever met, but here you were. “That wasn’t what they were after,” the exhaustion in Tara’s voice, the way it cracked just a bit, not nearly enough for Christina fucking Carpenter to notice, it made you sit down next to Tara and put an arm around her shoulders. Tara leaned into your touch right away, she hid her face in the crook of your neck, not even complaining when you took her phone. She just pulled your jacket tighter around herself, you’ve given it to her, helped her put it on, because she said it made her feel better.

The sudden wetness on your neck, the realization that it was Tara’s tear, nearly made you lose composure. “Tara needs to rest, please call her later,” you spoke as calmly as you could, hoping that you could soothe Tara by holding her close.

“Huh? What?” Christina sounded drunk even now, knowing her, she was drunk. You didn’t want to wait for the woman to figure out what was going on, you just hung up. She wouldn’t call back anyway.

“You’ll get through this,” you ran your fingers through Tara’s hair, gently calming her down like you did so many times in the past before her asthma could make her condition even worse.

It worked this time as well, as Tara managed a weak nod, her right hand reaching up and gripping your shoulder as if you being there was the only thing keeping her grounded. All things considered; you probably were. “He told me mom was proud of me,” Tara whispered, just barely loud enough for you to hear. “I really wished that was true, Y/N,” she cried, tears falling from her eyes as you just held her like that. How many times did she tell you those words? Or something along those lines. Almost everything was identical, other than the bare hospital room and her injuries. Tara’s emotions, her desire for her mother’s acceptance, it remained the same.

What could you even tell her when her mother wouldn’t even take the time to properly call and ask Tara how she was. How could she believe her mother was proud of her when that same mother didn’t care enough to drop everything and come back to her daughter that nearly got killed.

You remained in that position when Chad, Mindy, Wes and Amber came, with Amber, as the girlfriend, coming in first. The relief on the faces of the first three at the sight of Tara awake and as fine as she could be overpowered everything else, Mindy’s need to tease the two of you, Chad’s need to cheer for you and Tara, and Wes’ jealousy. It didn’t overpower Amber’s jealousy though. You weren't sure what to make of it, but the first thing Amber did was glare at you. Checking on Tara? Her girlfriend? Nope, glaring first, checking on her injured girlfriend who almost got killed later.

Chad, Mindy and Wes remained near the bottom of Tara’s bed, while Amber took her place on Tara’s right side, and while Tara turned to look at them, she kept her hand on your shoulder, preventing you from getting up. “I’m not going anywhere,” you muttered close to her ear, and only then did she let go of your shoulder and allow you to help her move so that she was leaning back against you.

“Sorry, mom just called,” she apologized, her eyes focusing on Amber for a few moments, though the apology was meant for all four of her friends.

Mindy nodded. “We figured, T,” she admitted, her eyes filled with compassion for Tara.

Amber leaned down, kissing Tara on the lips before you could properly look aside. And each and every person in the room could feel how uncomfortable the room just got. Amber kissed Tara, while Tara was leaning back on you and wearing your jacket. And nothing about what she did was accidental, she saw an opportunity and took it, probably believing she was staking her claim on Tara.

You didn’t react though, just looked away, you refused to give Amber that satisfaction or to make things even more uncomfortable for Tara. That is, until you heard Tara’s muffled groan.

“Be gentler,” you snarled, pushing Amber back when you saw she put some pressure on Tara’s right thigh, hurting Tara in the process.

Amber glared for just a moment, before turning her attention back to Tara. "I'm so sorry Baby, I was so worried and-" Amber apologized and you felt the urge to keep her away from Tara. It had to be the jealousy you sometimes felt, right? Surely there was no other reason you would want to push Amber further away from Tara. Amber wouldn't hurt Tara. Right?

"It's okay, I'm okay. I'm just glad you're here with everyone," Tara assured her softly, though she did back away a bit, leaning more toward you, and even as subtle as it was no one missed it.

"Of course, I'm here. Where else would I be but here with you?" the nerve, the audacity, another glare she sent your way. "I'm actually surprised Y/N showed up. You managed to act like a friend for once.”

You felt Tara go stiff at that, the tension, the disapproval radiating from her, you feared she would argue back, and this wasn’t the time for that.

"Where would my life be without your approval, Amber?" self-control be damned, preventing the argument between the two of them was more important, release the snark, target Amber. Tara stifling the tiniest laugh made it even better.

"Okay, okay, let's calm down," Wes, as usual, tried to defuse the situation before it escalated.

"Nah, let them go at it, we just need some popcorn," Chad looked around as if he was actually looking for popcorn. "My money's on Y/N, for obvious reasons," you doubted the double meaning behind those words escaped any of you.

"Yeah, it's not like we came here for Tara," Mindy deadpanned, which thankfully lowered the tension in the room.

You glanced down at Tara, surprised to see she glanced up at you instead of anyone else. There was something in her gaze you couldn't quite decipher. You saw it from time to time; when you first told her you were no longer speaking with your parents, the first and only time she asked you to stay by her side and quit MMA after you came back victorious but beaten and bruised from your first fight, when she told you she was dating Amber, and now. Somehow the only common factor in all those moments, aside from the undecipherable gaze, was the fact that you, in one way or another, always left. Not today, you promised silently as her attention shifted to the rest of her friends.

A brief conversation with her friends and girlfriend later you could see Tara progressively getting tired. Before you could react to that the doors opened again, and you immediately recognized the woman that entered the room. Sam, even after five years you knew it was her, and for a moment you weren't sure what to expect, but the concern on Sam's face when she saw Tara made you lower your guard.

You watched as Sam immediately knelt down next to Tara, her hands shakily reaching out for her younger sister. "How are you feeling?" you didn't remember ever hearing Sam's voice that shaky and uncertain.

"You came?" Tara's question, as filled with disbelief as it was, broke something in you and you focused on the heart rate monitor beeping to ground yourself as Sam introduced her boyfriend, Richie, or something, and then went to hug Chad, Mindy, and Wes. She didn't hug Amber and you noticed Amber didn't seem to mind that one bit. After a brief exchange with Wes, Sam returned to the left side of Tara’s bed and raised an eyebrow at you. You shrugged, motioning with your head at Tara who was still leaning back on you, silently telling the older Carpenter sister you weren’t moving any time soon. From the corner of your eye, you saw Tara blushing and looking to the side.

Sam just smiled and patted you on the shoulder. “Thanks, Y/N,” frankly, despite everything that happened, or perhaps because of everything that happened, having Sam around was much appreciated.

“Don’t mention it,” you smiled back.

Satisfied, Sam turned back to her boyfriend. "These are Chad and Mindy, the twins, and Wes. I used to babysit them all," she introduced the three of them.

"Which is always how I want to be introduced," Wes joked, lighting up the mood in the room.

Sam smiled at him before turning to you. "That's Y/N, I didn't babysit her," Sam continued the introduction.

"A very important detail, please remember," you motioned to the trio. "Needed a babysitter," then you pointed at yourself. "Didn't need a babysitter."

"You are like over a year and a half older than me, though," Tara teased you, even though that wasn’t the only reason Sam didn’t babysit you.

You did turn twenty about four months ago, while Tara was around three months away from turning nineteen. "Meh, insignificant details," you jokingly rolled your eyes, but grinned when she nudged you lightly with her elbow.

"And Amber, hey," Sam finally greeted Amber, Amber greeted her back, Richie introduced himself properly and then Sam pointed out the elephant in the room. "Where's mom?" the shift in Tara's demeanor was instantaneous and you reached down under the covers to hold her right hand. She relaxed a bit, but you still felt the tension in her body as she pressed back against you, seeking your touch and presence.

"She's stuck at a conference in London. She called me earlier," Tara clarified and it technically was true. Her mother did call, if that could be considered a call. You were willing to bet all of your savings that the drunk woman wouldn't even remember half of the conversation she had with Tara.

"How considerate of her," let it never be said that you always disagreed with Amber, because for once you agreed with her anger wholeheartedly. "Look guys, Tara is really tired, we should let her rest," twice in a row, maybe you should get worried. Her words got the other three to move as well.

You didn't move though. You didn't come with them, you wouldn't leave with them. If you left it would be brief and you'd stay right outside the doors.

"You as well, Y/N," Amber glared at you, she was daring you to disobey her, and well, who were you to disappoint her of all people.

"No," you wondered if Sam was noticing the tension between you and Amber, because, if Mindy was to be believed, it took exactly ten seconds to figure out that Tara was the cause of that tension.

"Y/N is staying, you as well Sam," Tara firmly ended the discussion.

Sam smiled slightly. "If it's okay with you, I could sleep here tonight?" it was a question as much as it was an offer.

"I'd really like that," Tara was smiling, happy to see Sam would stay by her side, at least for some time.

"You got everything you need? Do you have an extra inhaler?" Amber once again shifted Tara's attention back to her.

Tara nodded at that. "Yeah."

Amber leaned down and kissed her again. "Call me if you need anything."

If Sam had any reaction to the revelation that Tara and Amber were together, or the unusual situation Tara found herself in, with you and Amber, she didn't show or voice it in any way.

"Honey, I'll be outside," Richie, likely to give Tara and Sam some privacy, spoke to Sam and then turned toward you. "Uh, could you take me to the break room or something?"

You glanced at Tara, and seeing no issues with it nodded. You slowly separated from Tara, making sure she was comfortable, and stepped outside. Richie only needed a glass of water, so it didn't seem like you'd be away from Tara for long. Besides, you wanted to give Tara some alone time with Sam.

"So, an MMA fighter?" Richie's question took you by surprise. "I, uh, recognized the name, I watched a few of your fights," somehow it sounded like he was making it up on the spot.

"Is that so?" maybe the guy was just timid, he was Sam's boyfriend, so you decided to give him the benefit of the doubt and figured he was just uncomfortable about the whole situation, about meeting Tara in these circumstances, but still choosing to come here to support Sam. "Well, then you know why I didn't need a babysitter," you still made sure your tone sent a clear message. Don’t try anything. You weren’t about to fully trust anyone when Tara was attacked, except maybe Sam, because if there was one person who wouldn’t hurt Tara it was Sam.

~X~

You were sitting on the bed next to Tara’s for once, she was sleeping and Sam was next to her until about fifteen minutes ago, so you chose to give them some space. Keeping Tara safe was more important. Though, it spooked Sam’s boyfriend, as he went off to watch Netflix or something in another room.

Tara hummed, waking up from her slumber and turning to look at you. “Hey,” she whispered, reaching out for you.

Moving on instinct you moved to sit on her bed and took her hand. “Sam went to freshen up a bit, she’ll be back soon,” you told her.

Tara nodded, content at the moment.

And then the doors burst open, and you jumped to your feet, ready to fight. Sam came in, her eyes filled with panic as she looked at Tara. And then, seeing as Tara was fine, she just slumped back against the wall.

“Sam? What happened?” despite pain Tara sat up, watching, concerned and afraid as Sam dropped to the floor. You both noticed her legs were shaking, unable to hold her up.

“Ghostface was in the hospital,” Sam’s voice was barely louder than a whisper, but it felt like a bomb exploding right next to you. The monster was here. The one responsible for Tara’s pain was here!

“Are you okay?!” Tara demanded, just about ready to get up and go to Sam, and seeing the look on Tara’s face Sam willed her body to move, to sit on the chair next to Tara’s bed and smile at her.

“I’m fine, don’t worry,” Sam assured her. “I think he was just trying to scare me.”

You gritted your teeth, anger clouding your judgment. All you could focus on was the door, Sam’s confused uttering of your name barely registered in your head. It was all anger, wrath, need to hurt the monster that tried to kill Tara. It didn’t matter that the Ghostface probably took the disguise off and that you had no way of recognizing the person underneath it as the attacker, you just wanted to go out and find it. It was someone Tara knew, right? Those were the stupid rules, right?!

“Y/N!” while Sam calling your name fell on deaf ears, Tara was an entirely different case and the anger dissipated as you turned around and looked at her, trying to get out of the bed.

Anger vanished and you rushed back to her side. “Wait, Tara, don’t get up,” you said, gently getting her to sit back down. “I’m sorry, I got angry,” you whispered, looking away from her. You allowed your anger to cloud your judgment, the desire for revenge to make you forget for a brief moment of weakness what was more important.

Tara reached up, putting her right arm around your neck and tugging you down, and you gave in, dropping your head onto her shoulder and wrapping an arm around her. Tara took a deep breath, her hand shaking slightly. “I know, but I need you here,” she whispered, tightening her grip on you and getting you to nod. You’d focus on keeping Tara safe, and if that somehow gave you the chance to fight Ghostface, you’d take it, but you wouldn’t go after it while Tara was this vulnerable.

“I’m here,” you whispered.

A bit later Judy came by with Amber because not only was Sam attacked, some guy got killed, likely by a Ghostface, meaning either there were two people involved, or the one person involved was moving really quickly.

"The call came from Amber's number," Judy said, prompting Amber to defend herself only for Richie to accuse her of being the killer. You didn’t pay much attention to their words, instead you tried to find the signs that they were lying, in their posture, in the tone of their voice.

But it didn’t really help you, Amber was as assertive as usual, aggressively stating her mind and Richie, well, you didn’t even know him.

"And where were you when this was happening?" Judy asked him and he suddenly got really uncomfortable.

"I was, uh watching Netflix, in another room. I didn't want to wake Tara up," he tried to defend himself, and then he awkwardly pointed at you. “She also kinda scares me,” he admitted sheepishly.

“And where were you, Y/N?” Amber demanded.

“With Tara, right here,” you replied while looking Amber in the eyes, daring her to question you further.

“It’s not Y/N,” Tara declared before anyone else could say anything.

Amber narrowed her eyes, this time directing her anger at Tara. “Really? You defend her, but not me? Unbelievable,” she huffed, throwing her hands up. “You know what, call me when you feel like acting like my girlfriend,” she stormed out, anger evident in her voice.

“Amber, wait!” Tara reached out toward her and bit her lower lip.

You placed your hand on Tara’s shoulder. “I’ll go and talk to her,” you sighed, it was about time you had a nice long chat with Amber.

Tara looked at you incredulously and you just chuckled and gave her a thumbs up. Sure, you were the last person Amber wanted to talk to, but someone had to talk some sense into her.

This wasn’t going to be fun though. “Keep her safe,” you told Sam as you walked past her and went after Amber. You looked around and noticed her, near the vending machine in the corridor, still fuming. “Amber! We need to talk!”

She squeezed the bottle of water she got so hard you thought it would burst and then she turned to glare at you as you approached and eventually leaned against the wall near her. You’d wait for her to come to you, and she did.

"You're behind this, aren't you?!" she demanded rather forcefully as she closed the distance, the water bottle tossed aside. She stopped right in front of you, arms folded over her chest and furious glare present in her eyes. She was so angry you wouldn’t be surprised if smoke began coming out of her.

You could feel your blood pressure rising as you pinched the bridge of your nose. "Look, you already decided that it's me, so there's really no point in that conversation. Tara nearly got killed, set your jealousy aside until she recovers."

But Amber just snorted, as if she couldn’t believe what you were saying. "Stay away from my girlfriend, you hear me? My girlfriend, not yours. Go home, Y/N," did she actually think this would work? That she could demand something and you'd comply? Let alone when that something was leaving Tara? You’ve complied with her wishes long enough, wanting to avoid Amber taking her frustration out on Tara.

You bit that retort back, as tempting as it was to argue that you were Tara’s best friend. "That's what this is about? Really? You think I'm behind all of this yet your reason for wanting me to leave is because you're jealous?" flabbergasted didn't even begin to explain how you felt. You really, really, didn't feel like entertaining Amber's jealous outbursts, but you had to try and get her to cool her head so that Tara could rest peacefully.

Amber threw her hands up in the air and stepped back to point her finger at you. "Jealous? Of course, I'm jealous!" okay, you had to admit that one took you by surprise. "Do you have any idea how it felt to watch Tara on the verge of an asthma attack every time you had a fight and Chad didn't call her quickly enough? How many times have I had to be there for her because you won't stop fighting and it frightens her? Do you even know that she constantly worries that something will go wrong and that you won't come back?"

You were genuinely stunned as you took in what Amber was saying, you hated to admit it, but you would probably feel just as frustrated as she was.

"She likes me, she is my girlfriend. Y/N, Tara is mine, but," she approached you, looked you straight in the eyes, and whispered, "She loves you, and no matter how hard I try I can't cut you out of her life or her heart."

She took a few steps back and with a nearly maniacal grin on her face she asked. "So, tell me. If you aren't the killer, what will you do if whoever it is comes to kill her?"

At least that was simple. "Fight. It'll have to kill me before it gets to her. Our issues aside, I think we can agree Tara's safety is what's most important."

The maniacal grin widened. "With pleasure," it was a strange choice of words, but you figured she agreed.

~X~

Tara could barely breathe, too focused on everything Sam just told her. She finally knew why her dad left, she finally knew why Sam was distant and why Sam left her behind. Once upon a time, she thought that knowing why she was abandoned and left with an alcoholic mother that was never there for her would bring her closure, that it would bring her some semblance of peace. It didn't. It changed nothing.

And then you came in and her uncontrollable emotions found a new target.

"Amber should calm down a bit, I think, oh and they'll be ready to move you in an hour or so," you didn't do anything wrong, you were the one person that kept her calm, grounded and feeling safe and protected, it was the future that she was worried about. Because she was bound to be abandoned, wasn’t she?

"When will you abandon me, Y/N? Before or after I recover?" the question that plagued her mind just slipped out and the confused look on your face stung more than her wounds. At least the pain from her wounds was dulled by the painkillers.

"I'm not going to abandon you," you didn't get angry. You never got angry with her no matter what was going on. It would usually calm her down enough to rationalize whatever she was angry about. Amber would argue back and eventually guilt her into backing down. Wes would get defensive, and Chad would try to back down while Mindy would usually go for sarcasm. You just, in your own words, took it easy, because it was easier to solve whatever issue the two of you had when you weren't fighting. It didn't calm her down this time.

"Don't lie to me! You abandoned your parents just like how Sam abandoned me," and Amber kept telling her you'd abandon her, telling her that it was a matter of time. It wasn't just Amber, almost anyone who knew you would say the same story. While you slept with your arm around her one of the nurses came by.

'That girl wouldn't come to the hospital when her father got sick, and now she won't leave,' that's what the nurse said and it only made Tara believe you abandoned your parents even more. She remembered it clearly, turning sixteen and shortly afterward realizing she was in love with you. For months she struggled with that feeling, afraid of what it could do to your friendship, secretly hoping that you'd be the one to initiate something. When you didn't do anything, she decided she'd confess on your eighteenth birthday, only to be met with a new address and a casual confession that you cut contact with your parents. Instantly she was thirteen years old, and she had just been abandoned by Sam and the fear of you doing the same kept her mouth shut.

And then you chose MMA, despite how beaten up you were after your first fight, despite the fact that she all but begged you not to and it sealed the deal for her.

You sighed and sat down on her bed. "I didn't. It was a mutual agreement, I wanted to leave, and they wanted me gone. No one was abandoned," the world stopped. What did you just say? "I'd never abandon you, Tara."

"Why didn't you tell me before?" she choked out. Why would you keep it from her? That your own parents didn't want you to stay with them? Why wouldn’t they? All the times she saw small clues that something wasn’t right between you and your parents came back and she felt tears filling up her eyes.

You sighed as you reached down and began gently rubbing circles into her right palm. "How about this? I'll tell you why and then we'll leave the rest of the conversation for after you recover, or at least for after this whole thing ends?"

Tara nodded. She waited over two years, she could wait for a few more days.

"It just wasn't fresh in my mind, I guess. By the time I turned eighteen that deal had long since been made, so when it happened it felt more like going to an appointment rather than something significant. I never thought it would cause you to question how I feel about you, or to doubt that I'd stay with you," her breath hitched at that, and you were immediately reaching for her bag to get her inhaler. It wasn't asthma that caused her reaction. It was the way your voice switched from neutral, almost frighteningly cold while talking about your family to warmth and gentleness you reserved only for her the moment she became the focal point of your words.

"Y/N, I'm fine, I don't need it," those words were enough for you to stop and look at her. "Hold me?" you were awkward the first time she asked you to hold her, shortly after Sam abandoned her, but that awkwardness vanished as time went on. This time was different though. She could see uncertainty in your eyes, the worry caused by her injuries. "I can move that much," she assured you. She needed you as close to her as possible, she needed you to hold her to feel safe, the moment you let go of her to go with Richie she felt vulnerable. She felt even more vulnerable, when, after Ghostface attacked Sam, you went after Amber. Even with Sam right there with her, as well as Richie and Judy, Tara didn’t feel safe unless you were with her. Judy was Wes’ mom, she trusted her, Richie was a stranger, Sam was gone for five years, you were the only one that made her feel protected.

That need was what made her less considerate of Amber’s feeling on the matter. Besides, this, you holding her, it was part of how the two of you were even before she fell in love with you. Even if it wasn’t enough of an excuse, it didn’t change the fact that she needed you.

"You'll tell me the moment you get uncomfortable or if anything at all starts hurting," yeah, there was no arguing with you and honestly, she was fine with that in this case.

"I promise I will; now get down here," you complied with her request. She was slightly on her side, but for the most part she was facing you and somewhat lying on top of you, with both of your arms around her body. In addition to that she was resting her head on your chest, with your heart just below her ear. That brought a smile to her face. The steady beating of your heart and the heart rate monitor beeping created a rhythm only she had the pleasure to hear.

The way you held her, and the care you put into making sure she was completely comfortable stood in juxtaposition to the way Amber kissed her when she came to see her. Amber didn't intend to hurt her, but she didn't take extra care not to hurt her either.

Why did you have to make things so difficult for her? She was doubting her decisions, especially the ones concerning her relationship with you and, due to those thoughts, her relationship with Amber. The promise of the conversation and the conviction behind your words took away almost all of her reasons for keeping her feelings for you under lock and key. And the other reason, you fighting? A part of her hoped you’d give it up now, a selfish part of her hoped that nearly losing her would make you reconsider it. Another, louder part of her, told her she could compromise on that much, seeing how much she compromised with Amber, that she could do her best to accept and deal with it.

The guilt in her heart suddenly took over. It was several months too late now. At least until she found it in her to break up with Amber. To very likely do to Amber what she feared you'd do to her, what Sam and her dad did to her. To abandon Amber because she doubted Amber could settle for being just friends again. It wasn't your fault, but she was still going to complain to you about it. "You're the worst, you know," she pouted and settled for snuggling as close to you as her injuries would allow.

"Mhm, I know," you easily agreed, knowing better than anyone when her complaints were fake.

"Jerk."

"You know me," you chuckled, making her shiver.

"Let me sleep," she closed her eyes.

"I'm sorry, am I supposed to sing you a lullaby?" you really didn't have to tease her right now.

"Please, don't sing," Tara did not need to be tortured like that. Hearing you chuckle again, on the other hand, yeah, she could handle hearing that.

When they brought the two of you to her new room an hour later you effortlessly and carefully picked her up and placed her on the bed. You stood by her side as the nurses handled the rest, hooking her up to machines and whatnot. And then she got to melt into your touch once again as you lay down next to her, and with that same gentleness from before pulled her into your embrace.

As she once again fell asleep in your arms a voice in the back of her head berated her for ever allowing Amber to make her doubt you.

~X~

The sight in front of her really should have angered her. It would be a reasonable reaction, to find her girlfriend sleeping with someone else, and to remain calm would be bizarre. That is, if she actually cared. No, Amber didn't care about how close Tara and you were. Once upon a time, she did feel genuine envy toward you, she envied the way you made Tara laugh, she envied how peaceful Tara would look while sleeping in your arms. Despite what she did to Tara you, somehow, managed to make Tara feel safe.

So, as far as Amber was concerned Tara should have used this opportunity to fuck you, or get fucked by you, since, well, you'd be dead within the next couple of minutes. Then Tara would never again feel safe. By the time she wakes up she'll be covered in your blood, Amber would make sure of that. And then Tara would have no one to turn to, and she would, though more than likely a shell of her former self, belong to Amber.

It was fun, honestly, playing with Tara's doubts, downplaying her emotions for you, while simultaneously making her doubt your dedication to her. It wasn't Amber's fault Tara had abandonment issues that were easy to exploit. Granted, it wasn't her or Richie's intention to torment Tara like that, they just wanted you gone. Tara's torment was more of a bonus for Amber. It would make molding Tara into her perfect pet much easier if she was broken by this experience, because, as far as Amber was concerned, her and Richie would execute their plan flawlessly, and Amber would get to keep Tara all to herself.

Regardless, you were a threat, a trained fighter that might be able to stop them. Tara needed to survive the first attack so that Samantha would come back. Tara surviving also meant you'd act like a fucking guard dog. Predictable. She didn't think this would happen, though.

To think that you'd leave yourself this open and vulnerable. To think that all it took was a jealous girlfriend act to get you to talk to Tara and drop your guard. She didn't tell you a single lie, she didn't even exaggerate and Tara being this clingy only proved her words to be correct. You made a mistake, you fell asleep with your arms wrapped around the wounded girl. Even if you woke up right now you wouldn't have time to react, you likely wouldn't even realize what was going on.

If she could tell you one thing she'd would tell you that she was about to carve you up with the same knife she used on your beloved Tara. Poetic, isn't it, Guard Dog?

Story Masterlist / First part / Previous part / Next part

#tara carpenter x reader #tara carpenter x you #tara carpenter x female reader #tara carpenter #scream #jenna ortega x reader #x reader #x female reader

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demonslayerunhinged · 3 months ago

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Where do you think Sanemi went after he died? Breaks my heart reading the scene of Shizu and Sanemi reuniting only to get kicked out by his dad, Shizu did not deserve to stay with him. Wishful thinking on my part, I like to imagine he, Genya, and the rest of their siblings were able to convince her to come with them to heaven to be happy together since she was in limbo for so long already, maybe her sentence wasn’t as harsh as Kyogo’s. Unless Kyogo just kicked him out of hell and straight to heaven so he wasn’t around 😅 From my understanding, Shizu chose to go to hell from guilt, so that’s why I thought she could drift back to limbo. But I also don’t know the exact details of demon slayer’s heaven and hell aside from following the Buddhist concept. Honestly, my mind went on a tangent and it makes me wonder what happened to Shizu and the siblings after we were show the reincarnations/descendants (I will die on the hill that Sanemi’s descendent is also his reincarnation lol.) Genya was clearly so important to Sanemi, but he and the rest of the children also cared for their mother and it’s just so tragic for her. Anyway, what are your thoughts on Sanemi’s fate?

Hi anon! Sorry this took so long to answer, I've been swamped with work but anyways thanks for your question.

I believe Sanemi would go to heaven, he hasn't killed any human, he was just protecting Genya when he killed his mom. He may be prickly but he's an honest and good person.

For Shizu, I feel that she would still be in hell because she killed her kids. I don't think someone can be as easily let into heaven as they can into hell although, I haven't really done any research of Buddhism so I'm not really sure but I'd like to believe that her remorse would allow her to rejoin her kids. Kyogo can kick rocks, he's going to remain in hell and reincarnate as a turd floating in the toilet of an abandoned house.

For the second question, this may be controversial but I don't consider the reincarnation story line as canon. I think it was just a way for Gotogue-sensei to placate the fans who were sad that their fav characters died. Maybe the Shinazugawa babies reincarnated as other children but still it's weird not to have them interact with r-Genya and r-Sanemi seeing how family was so important to them.

I feel the whole thing is one of those information gaps that plague the series.

Hope this answers your question :)

#demon slayer #kimetsu no yaiba #kny #sanemi shinazugawa #kny spoilers #unhinged asks #shinazugawa brothers #genya shinazugawa #kny anime #kny manga #sanemi

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eddiessluttywaist · 2 years ago

Text

desiderium

an eddie munson series

AGELESS/BLANK/UNDER 18 BLOGS ARE NOT WELCOME TO INTERACT. PLEASE RESPECT MY RULES AND BOUNDARIES.

summary: eddie’s odd, forgotten childhood friend seeks him out when he needs her more than he realizes.

pairing: bsf!mechanic!bartender!eddie x eccentric!bsf!fem!reader

word count: 6,118 words

content/warnings: eventual smut so MDNI, angst, fluff, swearing, loneliness, family issues, feeling unwanted, mentions of bullying, low self esteem, anxiety, mentions of inappropriate and abusive relationships from reader’s past (nothing detailed), mentions of relationships with an inappropriate age gap (adult men dating reader when she was still a teenager—nothing detailed), brief mentions of imprisonment, crying. i think that’s it!

a/n: sorry to say not all updates will be this quick 🫠 this is only ready now because i had already written a good chunk of it when i wrote part one. creds to whoever owns and posted those ^ photos! they’re not mine, i just made the collage!

part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - part 5

“How’d it go?” Martha pulled herself up to get a better look at you, hands on the inner edge of the service desk.

She probably thought with how much time had passed, that things went well. That you spent time with Eddie while he worked, talking when he wasn’t too focused on something else. Maybe you went out to eat and caught up—surely that was why you were returning now when you had left to see him around late morning. It definitely wasn’t because you drove off after he snapped at you and didn’t even give you a chance to defend yourself. A prank? Why would it have been a prank?

It certainly hadn’t been so long because you couldn’t stand the idea of facing her with tears in your eyes and a waver to your voice. Surely, you hadn’t been crying and chastising yourself in your car in some random parking lot until you felt you could be seen in the outside world again. There was no way you were showing up now because when you were on your way to get more greasy food, your car sputtered to a halt because you’re an idiot who had the engine running the entire time you were in that parking lot.

She imagined your afternoon spent with Eddie—not a few strangers who helped you push your car to the nearest gas station (which was thankfully rather close, your only bout of luck thus far). You didn’t need to stop to cry a second time in one day (this time with the car off) just so you could get it out of your system before going into the market on your way back. And by that point it wasn’t even about Eddie. Okay, maybe a little bit, but mostly just because you were so overwhelmed by how everything was going wrong.

She was sure during all that time that you had successfully reunited with your long lost friend. But then as you trudged over, you pointed to your temple.

“Always better up here, right?” you murmured, voice tired and your eyes still somewhat raw.

“Oh, dear…,” she sighed, reaching to pat your hands that were now settled on the ledge where guests were greeted.

“I don’t… I don’t really want to talk about it…,” you admit, and she gives your hands a small squeeze. She can’t help but notice the scent of salt and grease—you definitely had a bag with cheeseburgers and fries waiting for you, probably settled on the floor beside your feet so you weren’t leaving oily stains on her countertop.

Maybe it was ridiculous to be so upset. Stupid emotions. Stupid, stupid emotions that you should be able to control by now. Maybe it was because you let yourself get caught up in your hopes more than you thought and now you were left not just disappointed, but humiliated too.

“Oh, I got you this,” you continue after what you hoped was a forgettable dab to the corner of your eye with the knuckle of your right thumb. You pull your purse to the side to grab a small brown paper bag—one that didn’t have stains collecting on the bottom. “They didn’t have tuna, but I know you said you like turkey better than ham so…”

“You don’t need to keep bringing me food,” she reassured you with a sweet smile, as if it didn’t make her day whenever you did. She wasn’t used to such a kind young girl being around—someone who thought to get her something to eat or listened to her stories with all the respect and attentiveness that makes a person feel like they matter.

“It’s rude to show up with food for myself and not for you,” you argued gently while offering her a weak, closed mouth smile.

“You still don’t have to, though… Why don’t you go lie down, hm?” Martha patted at your hands again before sinking back into her seat. “Rest up a little. I’m here if you need to talk.”

As you laid alone in your bed that night with your hair still partially damp after a shower—memories of your childhood flooded in. You hated feeling so utterly lonely and rejected. It only made you think of growing up which always made you feel worse. It reminded you of being all by yourself at ages where you really should’ve had your parents around, or at least a babysitter.

They hadn’t been ready to have a kid, not really. The couple had been all wrapped up in the romanticism and fantasy of starting a family, and didn’t listen when other parents shared stories to hint at the fact that it’s not that easy. You wondered if that’s when they started to hate you. When you cried all night when they wanted to sleep or go bar hopping with friends. When you’d spit up on them; or suddenly have a shift in your sleeping habits just when they thought they had a grasp on them; or when you constantly grew out of those clothes they swore they just bought. You were a waste of time and money. They looked forward to you growing up more than anything so they could leave you in the house and eventually kick you out of it.

Once you were old enough to make a sandwich or pour a bowl of cereal on your own, they abandoned you as much as possible. Sure, you could handle a peanut butter and jelly or a bowl of Cheerios—that didn’t mean you felt secure in the house all by yourself. At first you would leave all the lights on to give yourself some semblance of security, but then they yelled at you over an electric bill you didn’t understand. Then you’d have “accidents” just so they’d come home—whether that was slicing your finger while trying to cut your sandwich or because you fell or something else you thought of. You found comfort in them being around even if they were pissed at you for being the reason they had to come back early. Then they stopped coming home when you called them crying. Instead, they reassured you that you were old enough to clean your finger and put on a bandaid; or that the fall wasn’t that bad if you could get up and go to the phone in the kitchen. So that ended up being a lost cause.

The habit that stuck the longest was from that little magic 8 ball you got one birthday from an aunt you never saw. It actually listened to you and gave you the reassurance and guidance you needed. When you were scared of the dark, you’d whisper “Do monsters exist?” and it told you no. When you thought you heard someone in the house just because it was settling, you’d ask it if someone broke in and it helped ease your racing heart with the same reply. Besides Eddie, it was your only companion. That stupid hunk of plastic.

Hot tears that you assumed were all spent earlier today stream down from your eyes and into your hair as your train of thought turns to one memory in particular. That night you shook the child’s toy with all your might as you asked it if your parents loved you. This time the familiar phrase scratched into that floating blue triangle wasn’t so comforting.

It was a flash. A blurry replay from the back of your mind, but it still hit you hard. You wipe at your wet cheeks with the feverish haste of someone who was crying in front of a stranger. No one was in the room with you, but you still hated the way it felt. You should’ve never let any of those tears fall today—that’s what made them real. That’s what cemented how miserable you really were.

“Just look up at the sky and blink if you don’t want to.” Eddie had said as he sat next to you on the pavement.

He had been teaching you how to skate and you fell off of his board, leaving your knees and palms all scraped up and bloody. You wanted to cry, but you hated crying. It made you feel like a dumb kid. Mom and dad hate dumb, crybaby kids. You should be able to control your emotions better than this by now.

“If they don’t slip out then they’re not real. They never happened, I promise.” The boy lisped around the gap in his teeth. He had lost his last baby tooth earlier that week. He was all grown up, you guessed.

“But what about when I can’t keep them in?” You whimpered, unsure if you’d be able to blink them back the way he suggested. The boy toyed with a piece of gravel between his fingers and shrugged lazily.

“I dunno. Just wipe ‘em away, I guess. I don’t have any tissues, but you can use my sleeve if you wanna.”

He pulled his long sleeve down until it was over his hand and offered his covered fist to you.

You huffed out a broken laugh at the memory and pulled your own sleeve down to continue wiping at your face. God, you missed him. He was your first best friend, and honestly your last. You had never felt that close with anyone else, and sure it was dumb because you were only kids but it still meant a lot to you. He was who you went to when you didn’t want to stay in an empty house, and even though most parents would throw a fit over a girl and a boy having sleepovers—yours couldn’t care less. At least someone else was in charge of you, even if it was Eddie’s dad who they thought was shit for reasons you didn’t understand.

He was a kind of intimidating looking character and sometimes he insisted you two stay at the local park until he came to get you when he had some friends on their way over (which you realized the implications of later), but he was a nice dad. You were around so often that he’d call you “kiddo” and ruffle your hair the way he did with Eddie’s buzzed scalp—which was more grabbing the fuzzy top of his head and nudging him around playfully than really ruffling hair. He knew you didn’t like crust on your sandwiches. He knew you liked strawberry milk more than chocolate milk, which Eddie appreciated cause it meant more chocolate Yoo-hoo for him. His dad was relatively busy and a little intense, but you liked him and you liked staying over.

Even at 24, you missed blanket forts. You missed making up stories under all the blankets and sheets as you held flashlights under your faces. You missed “camping” in the backyard. You missed wrestling. You missed watching tv until the American flag was fluttering and the national anthem played until the screen faded to black. You missed the anticipation of trying to see who was faster at turning off the tv before the screen flipped to those streaks of color and let out that god awful noise. You took turns to see who could get the closest to right when it was about to switch but before that noise could sound. You had the best score before he left.

You smiled lightly now as you settled into the bed, face still warm from all your distress of the day. Despite Eddie being part of why you had been crying in the first place, you still turned to memories of him to calm yourself down. You thought about when you were sure he’d be your first kiss—a decision you had made unfortunately a few weeks before he left. This was the kind of childish memory that made you roll your eyes, but deep down it actually made life simpler and sweeter so you still cozied up to it whenever you remembered. Reminiscing about when those kinds of things were new and exciting—without the burden of knowing all the mess that eventually comes with endearment—soothed you.

At the time, you were steadily approaching adolescence and starting to pay attention to romance novels and tv programs. It made having a boy as your best friend suddenly feel different in your stupid little prepubescent brain. The same shit he always did started to make you go shy and blush, and he’d nudge you and call you a “fuckin’ dork”. He was still in his “girls are gross” phase whereas you were already forming crushes. You developed crushes just about every day by the time you were in fifth grade, but you liked your best friend the most.

It’s funny actually—or maybe just sad—but you still had a habit of constantly forming crushes. The thought of being desired by someone thrilled you, but that love for attention put you in shitty situations sometimes. No one even liked you until you were maturing in a way that felt so much sooner and so much faster than the other girls by grade 6. Maybe that should’ve been the tell that the sudden interest in you was hollow, but it made you feel special. You kinda liked knowing boys fixated on you even if they were mimicking lewd comments they overheard their older brothers say or wrote about you in the boy’s bathroom—no matter how much you hated yourself for secretly basking in all of the attention.

It wasn’t always dumb boys in middle school, though, even if it would’ve been nice for things to be that basic forever. Eventually it was guys who were too old for you when you were in your late teens. The types who’d say shit like “That’s what you gotta love about high school girls. You get older, and they stay the same age,” and made you feel like you were grown and capable—when it benefited them, of course.

The nights you regretted getting wrapped up in the excitement of an older man or someone you had never met before at a bar or someone who had a bad habit of punching holes into walls awfully close to where your head was against the plaster—you thought about Eddie. You wondered if he grew up to be as awful as all the other boys you knew. If he turned into a creep or if he was the same, sweet boy who—sure, would hold you down and pretend he was gonna spit on you—but had also been taught to hold the door open for you or gave you a flower on your birthday or held your hands when he taught you to skate, promising that he wouldn’t let you fall. Well, except for when you insisted you were ready to do it by yourself. Then he said “Okay, but if you fall on your ass then you don’t get to yell at me.” And you didn’t yell, but he gave you his sleeve if you needed to cry.

There were parents who disappointed. Extended family you rarely heard from. Friends that came and went. Boyfriends who broke your heart, but best friends were forever in your mind. Wasn’t that why you made those bracelets and spit into your palms before shaking on the decision that you were always going to be there for each other?

Eddie’s shift dragged along after that strange young woman showed up. He knew his reputation. He knew that he was the butt of most jokes. He knew he was the town freak even when he had finally graduated and was trying to be a responsible adult. There would always be a few who remained unrelenting in their efforts to make him miserable, or at least that’s how it felt. And it wasn’t like you were someone he recognized as guilty for his constant harassment, but it wouldn’t be the first time some local asshole’s cousin or friend came to visit and was put up to the task of making him feel liked just for it to be some cruel punchline. He was tired of the jokes and the pranks and the muttered comments as people watched his every move. He needed to stay one step ahead or he’d be dealing with it forever. Why else would you pull him away from the back just to talk to him? He didn’t even know you. The frustration burned at him through most of his shift, which he took out on all the exertion he had to put into fixing that crappy Ford Ranch Wagon. He prayed that he would finally sleep tonight, the thought of a hot shower and an old bed waiting for him steadily bringing his mood back up.

Eddie sighed happily when it was time to clock out, holding the door open for Linda on her way out so she could lock up for the two of them.

“Night, Lin,” he sighed with a small smile that spoke of apologies for his constant grouchiness, and parted from her to head to his van.

“Oh, wait!” she suddenly called out, making him raise his brows and twist on his heels. He watched her make her way over to him all while holding something out for him.

“This was left for you by that odd girl who came by.”

At the mention of you, he scowled a little—certain it was a continuation of some joke, until he felt the plastic beads strung together on some string.

“Uh… thanks.”

“She looked real upset. All teary-eyed. Did you break up with that poor girl?”

“What?” Eddie’s head snapped up to eye her incredulously. “I—No! I don’t even recognize her. I don’t think we’ve even met before.”

Lin eyed him suspiciously before letting out a small hum. Men, she thought, although Eddie had always been a good kid, in her opinion—no matter what others said.

“Really, I swear.”

“Okay, hon… well go get some rest, alright?”

He hoped the same for her, and walked back to his car once she was safe in her vehicle and driving off. Eddie clambered into his old van and carelessly punched the button that turned on the light above his head. The bracelet in his hand was small and crowded with an odd assortment of different shaped and colored beads except for seven of the nearly identical beads that were lined up in the center. At both ends there were knots in the thick string to keep the beads from slipping off and had tails left on either side so you could tie and untie the bracelet whenever. Not that you two ever did untie them. The only time you took yours off was when you went swimming at the community pool and were scared you were going to lose it—and that didn’t count. You both promised it didn’t count cause you were just avoiding disaster.

He held it up to get a better look and read the lettering on those seven beads.

C-R-I-T-T-E-R

Critter. Eddie’s brows furrowed together and confusion was only welcome for half a second—maybe even less—before a pang of familiarity punched him in the gut.

“You’re doing it wrong!”

“How can I be doing it wrong? Will you screw off?”

“Eddie, you have to make a pretty pattern of colors, not just random mish-mash. See?”

You held up the bracelet you were working on for him with a pattern of his favorite colors: red bead, blue bead, black bead, red bead… and so on. His was just whatever bead he grabbed that he thought looked cool since you had so many to choose from. There were bulky wooden ones; those tiny little rainbow ones your mom let you have when her long necklace full of them broke (she didn’t want to clean them up so she promised you could keep them if you did); sunburst ones; chunky square ones that had letters and numbers on them; tribeads that were half in and half out of that thin plastic Beadery bag in your collection; and those dumb pop beads that he couldn’t even put on the string but of course kept picking up by accident.

“Screw off,” He insisted a second time and you rolled your eyes before continuing with your craft.

For all the shit you gave him, you loved the bracelet. Once it was done and he gave it to you, it was officially the most beautiful piece of jewelry you owned. You had insisted you two trade the bracelets like you heard the other girls in your grade talk about. You had to make them for each other rather than make your own and you had to tie them around the other’s wrist while they closed their eyes and made a wish.

Some of the boys in school gave him shit for it, calling him names for wearing jewelry he got from the girl in the grade below them. He didn’t care though. After all, Eddie wasn’t one to change himself for the sake of fitting in and he loved his bracelet.

He laughed a bit in disbelief now as he looked down at the bracelet he made for you back in 1975. You remembered him? God, he hadn’t thought of you in forever. Not to be an ass, but because it got too painful.

Among all of the stress that night his dad was arrested, he had been so overwhelmed that he completely shutdown. He was quiet and his expression was numb as he answered questions and packed his things. He was apprehensive and apathetic when he was brought to his uncle he rarely saw, but he didn’t cry. And he never told anyone this, but he never cried until a random thought of not seeing his best friend anymore suddenly set him off while he was trying to sleep. That was what made him realize the reality of everything that occurred. He didn’t have his home anymore. He didn’t have his dad. He didn’t have anything other than a new guardian and a trailer with one bedroom that Wayne had to pull all of his stuff out of so Eddie could have it. And he didn’t have you.

He brought you up a few times, but eventually stopped when he realized how stressed Wayne got over the mention of a trip into Ohio. A trip that meant dipping into his funds—that were already starting to run spectacularly low now that he was responsible for an 11 year old—for the gas money and probably a fee at the state line. Likely a motel room too, if your parents didn’t let them stay at the house.

How did he not recognize you? The more he thought over your interaction, the more he recognized your eyes and the shape of your nose and the curve of your lips even if they were fuller now. Little things here and there that even as an adult made it easier to see the bits and pieces of how you used to look. Here he’s been sulking in all his misery and loneliness, and he had completely scared off the chance to have an old best friend back. And Linda said you had tears in your eyes?

Eddie groaned as he let his head sink forward and rest on the center of his steering wheel. He didn’t even care about the horn that permeated the still night around him as self deprecating thoughts swirled before finally letting up on the button. This groan wasn’t a useless cry to the sky over the state of his life like the others so far, but rather a display of anger at himself for being such a dick. And he couldn’t even fix it. He didn’t have your phone number. He didn’t know where you were staying, if you were even staying. Did you move here? Were you just driving through the state and thought to drop by? Maybe have lunch and catch up before leaving again?

Why did he always have to fuck everything up?

You spent a good portion of your weekend sulking until Martha dragged you out on Sunday. You had been eating all the food you brought with you alone in your room and only went outside when you craved your bad habit enough.

“This has to be a violation of a paying customer’s privacy…,” you groaned as you rolled over and shoved your face into your pillow to avoid the light coming in full force from the windows. Martha had unlocked your door and came in to throw the curtains open to pull you out of your post-humiliation funk.

“It’s a beautiful morning. We’re going on a walk to take it all in and I’m taking you to that diner I keep telling you about.”

“I could’ve been naked. What if you came charging in here and I was laying here naked? Neither of us would’ve recovered. And our friendship would be ruined.”

“Oh don’t be so childish,” Martha huffed, hands on her hips. For an older woman she sure could be spritely when she wanted to be—whipping around your room the way she had been and insisting on a journey into the outdoors.

“It’s too cold.”

“Not when we start moving. It’s not even Autumn yet.”

“Technically the first day of Fall has already passed,” you corrected, still face planting your pillow and raising your hand up as you made your point before dropping it back down.

“Well the cold hasn’t reached us yet. I think you’ll survive. Come on, dear, it’ll be good for you. Good for both of us. I’m always cooped up at that desk.”

You sigh, but stay in your bed with all your plans set on sulking until the end of time. Until you were a pile of dust she was vacuuming up so she could get the room ready for someone else. Maybe you were being a tad dramatic, but you still felt that way.

“You want me to wake you up the way Howard did with our daughter? When she wouldn’t get up for high school?”

Now groaning at the thought of that cup of ice cold water trick she told you about, you huff and you finally force yourself up.

Despite your initial refusal to get out of bed, you were glad that Martha made you. It really was a wonderful morning and the smell of fresh air and the sound of the occasional leaf crunching under your feet refreshed you. Even with how deeply you despised being lonely, you had a habit of isolating yourself when you were upset and it could be quite destructive at times when you didn’t have someone to pull you back out of it. She didn’t even force you to discuss Thursday, just kept up casual chit chat like always.

And even if that walk hadn’t been enough to begin lifting your spirits, the food at the diner certainly would’ve done the trick all on its own. It wasn’t the prettiest joint around, but the breakfast was phenomenal. You wondered if she picked up on the fact that food and eating with others was a part of your love language. Being introduced to such an amazing local restaurant that clearly meant a lot to her soothed your aches of rejection and mortification.

Both aspects of the morning Martha forced you to take part in actually helped to improve your mood. What happened still stung but it was less “end of the world” and a little more “bump in the road.” With the fresh air, breakfast food and Martha’s pep talks—you were thinking of your next couple of steps forward rather than all the doom and gloom. You’d attempt to quit all the fast food that only left you more sluggish, and start finding other things to pay attention to. You weren’t giving up on Eddie, but you had to focus on your other needs again. This meant getting out of bed. Eating something other than cheeseburgers and fries, promising Martha you’d get other food Monday.

Well, maybe not Monday. You may have caved again, but you swore the next day. So on that following Tuesday night, you were at the market to pick up some things for you and Martha. There was a small fridge and a cabinet in your room that you could keep things in, and you offered to pick up anything she needed while you were out.

Peanut butter for you, cans of soup for her—oh, actually soup sounded good. With your sudden craving, you grabbed a few more cans. Milk for both of you, as well as cereal. Microwave meals for you, sardines for her—

Oh gross, sardines?

—Could you even stay friends at this revelation? You supposed you could since she let you bother her even with your fast food she couldn’t stand. But this fact wasn’t going anywhere. You were going to give her your best, most dramatic yuck when you gave her her groceries and you would have to insist that she never eats them where you can smell them.

You moved on through the list, and pushed your cart that fought you every step of the way to the bread and baked goods aisle. Why did you always get the cart with the squeaky wheel? The one that stuck every now and then and dragged against the linoleum before finally returning to a squealing roll? Bad luck, you supposed.

Once you were in the aisle, you double checked what brand she requested before letting out a sigh. Of course they were the loaves that were neatly stacked on the top shelf. Notepad paper crushed between your hand and the shelf you were using for support, you stretched up onto your tiptoes as best as you could to grab for one. You could easily grab the pinched end of one and just tug, but you didn’t want to accidentally squish any of them or make any of the others go tumbling. You’re about to step on the bottom shelf when suddenly a hand much larger than yours littered with heavy rings was grabbing it either from you like a dick or for you like a gentleman.

“Still short, huh?” You heard the rough, tired voice say from beside you.

You settled back on your feet and glanced at the man holding out the loaf of bread for you. He was in those dirty coveralls again with the sleeves rolled up, clearly from when he had taken the time to clean his hands and forearms before leaving his shift. His hair was out of its ponytail now so you could see it in all of its chaotic glory. As you accepted his kindness for Martha’s sake, you did your best to tamper your reaction to him being here. Whether it was any excitement over him possibly trying to fix things; or if it was intrigue over how his hair got so long and the fact that he had tattoos now; or if it was irritation leftover from how he treated you last Thursday. Had you still been familiar with one another, and this had been a small spat between friends, you probably would’ve just punched his arm.

“What? Come to yell at me some more?” You mutter. Okay so trying to keep a neutral stance wasn’t going very well.

You hear him exhale a quick sigh at your words and the way you refused to look at him. You had one elbow leaning against your cart now while you put all your focus on toying with the piece of paper in your hands. Folding and unfolding, smoothing out creases, lining up the edges of the paper and fixing the previous fold so everything fits better.

“No,” he replied in a defeated tone, but you still weren’t looking at him. “‘N I’m sorry about that, okay? Just wasn’t expecting it, and it’s not like you’re 9 anymore.”

“So I’m guessing you recognize me now?”

“A little, yeah,” He tried to be playful, a small smile tugging on his features until you looked up at him with that sad expression and he was deflated again. “Joke. Bad joke, I- of course I recognize you, Critter.”

You failed in your attempt to not smile at the nickname you hadn’t heard in far too long, making Eddie straighten out his posture again at the sight of your lips curving up.

“You still don’t have a poker face. That right there?” He points at your smile, while his own pulled at his lips “That’s how I won all of your best candy bars on Halloween.”

“You never really kept them from me,” You countered, head tilting back to fully look up at him now and your smile a little more sure.

“Of course not. Cause I’m a sucker and you can get whatever you want with a pout,” He laughed and you grew bashful as your cheeks flushed, ducking your head back down to try and hide it.

“Here,” Eddie sighed after a beat, digging into his pocket and pulling out a bracelet to drop in your palm.

Figuring he was returning yours to you, you were confused when you didn’t see your usual mix of beads. Your brows stayed knit together until you recognized those red, blue and black beads and the nickname in the center. Your features softened as you held out your hand for him to drop it into.

L-O-O-G-I-E

“You kept it…?” you murmured as you stared at the plastic bracelet like it’s treasure, before looking up at him again while your fingers brushed over the beads.

“Obviously,” he replied bluntly, pointing at it.

“Completely tore my place apart to find it so I could prove it, too. Not that my place is the neatest to start with, but…,” he let out a light laugh, head tilting and lazy smile tugging at one side of his mouth. He still smiled the same.

You eyed him for a moment, then returned your focus to the old jewelry. You felt oddly reserved with him after his initial reaction to your appearance at his work, and all the time you spent apart. You never had to work up the courage to speak to him before, or think about what to say or how to say it.

“10.”

“…Hm?”

“I was 10 years old. You said I wasn’t exactly 9 anymore, but it was actually a few weeks out from my birthday when you had to leave.”

“I guess that’s true, huh?” Eddie sighed, crossing his arms over his chest.

Why were his arms so fit? And veiny? And why do you have to tilt your head back to see his face now? Ugh, you’re starting to feel like that young girl who read her first romance novel and was developing her first crushes.

“Yeah…,” you say simply, fearing you’ll make a fool of yourself if you try to say more.

“I’m sorry that all happened around your birthday.”

He was so sincere when he said it, but it made your eyes grow wide as you looked up at his face again.

“Oh god– no. No, no, no. Don’t apologize. That’s not how I meant that at all. You-- that wasn’t your fault. And it was worse for you than it was for me, for obvious reasons.”

“Yeah, with the convict dad and all. But it’s a real shame…,” he sighs with feigned disappointment. “Y’know… that you couldn’t kiss me on your birthday.”

That evil grin sunk his dimples into his cheeks and he sucked on his teeth while he clasped his hands behind his back. Your eyes might as well have been popping out of your skull at this point, your whole face heating up.

“I— you— how— oh, you dick!” you gasp at the revelation through all of your sputtering and punch his shoulder without even thinking, and certainly not noticing the elderly woman who huffed at your unladylike behavior before scuttling away. “You read my diary!”

“Yeah, well, you really should’ve gotten the kind that came with a lock.”

“So you don’t recognize me, but you remember a journal entry you shouldn’t have read? Great, that’s great, Eddie.”

You were turning around now, starting to push your cart towards the other end of the aisle. Roll. Squeak. Maybe it was time to head back to Ohio? Maybe you didn’t need such an obnoxious little shit back in your life. Drag. Roll. Squeak.

“I said I was sorry for not recognizing you,” he groaned and followed after you. “How much groveling am I gonna have to do?”

Oh, plenty. Plenty of groveling.

taglist: @mystars123 @h-ness1944 @ohmeg @milkymil-k

@eddiesprincess86

#eddie munson #eddie munson smut #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson imagine #stranger things x reader #stranger things imagine #bsf!eddie munson #mechanic!eddie #bartender!eddie munson #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson x fem!reader #eddie munson stranger things #desiderium part 2 #desiderium eddiessluttywaist #eddiessluttywaist #eddie munson angst #slow burn #slow burn eddie munson #desiderium series

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cupcakeslushie · 1 year ago

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Okay. I've been tip-toeing around this AU for a while now, but I just got caught up, and now I think I have a (decent) grasp on what's going on. So I wanna go over everything I know so far to see if I'm right or wrong on anything. Don't know if you'd be willing to correct me or not. Either way, I hope my mistakes can help you understand what to clarify to other fans like me. But, I also have some questions. You probably won't be able to answer most of them, but it's at least worth a shot.

First, where's Venus? Like, why is she not in your comics that are (sort of) separate frome the canon now story. The ones that skip to the future way after all the turtles reunite. Did she die? Did she escape? Is it because she wasn't introduced yet when you made those comics?

Two, why do you keep on making references to the future timeline? I know you're planning on possibly making your own stuff leading up to the events of the movie. It just gives me a jumpscare when I see certain...imagery in those comics. I guess you're hinting at what your version of the future apocalypse would look like, but it just hurts to see. Specifically in the comic explaining both the events and aftermath of the movie and the bad future timeline. It's starting to really confuse my brain as to where this story is headed. What's meant to be the main focus? The Hamto's reuniting? The aftermath? Or the future?

Third, did you make all those min-comics before you started the actual AU? Or did you do them during?

Fourth, are any of those mini-comics relevant to the actual story now? Or have you changed your mind on a few things? It's just that everything is so all over the place, I don't really know whether to trust if they're accurate. I know most of them are just there for funzies, but the longer ones concern me. I guess I'm just not used to the storyteller doing sequel, start, prequel, start, sequel, prequel, prequel, sequel, and then end. Or maybe it's just me, and I'm sleep deprived.

My little observation speech is gonna take a while for me to get out in your asks because when I get theoretical, my speech gets long, and my proper English goes down the drain. So I'll be back. I appreciate your work very much. Despite the pain it causes me, it's still amazing.

I’ll try my best to clear up what confusion I can!

1. As far as Venus. The answer is kind of a mix of, I was still figuring out her design and backstory while coming out with some of those early comics, and then, once I had that down, I wanted the boys to grow strong bonds as a main cast. That’s why a lot of the side characters are only making small appearances in the Sep!AU Life stories, as those are mainly for the boys reconnecting. (Usagi shows up the most because I love him and am totally biased towards him).

This maybe hasn’t been stated outright, but I wasn’t really expecting so many ppl to like Vee as much as they do, and now im trying not to spoil too much of her story. It’ll unfortunately just take us a while to get to the meat of it. Since the boys reconnecting takes up a lot of the early s1s2 story, Im trying to follow the familiar Rise blueprint of Draxum, Shredder, Krang, and then in s3 we’ll have crazy fun new stories with the extra characters.

Ive also decided to take this little nugget from one of the Q&As, and use it for Venus instead of Jennika. It was a much needed bit of inspiration to explain why Venus sorta disappears for a while and will go through some major physical changes (not yet revealed) before the family can figure out a way to reach her.

2. I’m not sure if you mean jump scared in a bad/triggering or neutral way, but if you need me to tag anything on those posts please let me know!

The glimpses of the future timeline, are being scattered throughout wherever they parallel the present story in little ways, but that’s only for now. As we get closer to the movie plot, bigger chunks of the future will be revealed, because the future versions of the boys will have a larger role to play in the present timeline. So we will need more backstory than what the canon got. And also I just enjoy drawing my future versions so sometimes I don’t think too hard on a reason. I just like throwing them at ppl with no warning or reason.

When s2 ends, I plan on collecting all the future related stuff that’s been released, and recapping it for easier reading. Right now, it’s just little sprinkles of foreshadowing to give ppl an idea that, ‘oh crap. The doomed timeline is a bummer’. In my mind, I guess i thought it’d be kinda like a fun scavenger hunt for clues, but maybe ppl don’t like that 😅

3. All of the side-stories were written as the main comic was/is being released. A lot of them resulted from asks that just spawned the need to expand on certain ideas, or a desire to give all the turtles their time to shine.

For instance, when I was doing Donnie’s section of the main comic, it was a good few months where we hardly saw anyone but him and Venus. I wanted to just mix it up, and give Raph some love with his ‘Raph Time’ short. When Leo was front and center in the main, we hardly saw the others, so Mikey and Donnie got their little ‘Secrets’ short (and it was also I fun thank you for EW making it so far in the tmnt sep competition).

4. Anything that has been reworked/revised or just plain dropped should have an ‘Edit’ note because yes—I have gone back and changed some things, but more so from the asks i got in the early days, and some movie idea drafts.

All the short comics done in the last year, especially the ones that are listed in my pinned post, are canon and fall somewhere in the timeline. They’re like supplemental reading though—extra meat to give the world and the characters more personality. They do have particular backstory plot and important info in them, but nothing that shouldn’t eventually be re-visited/repeated in the main story.

um I hope that cleared up some things! I know it’s kind of a crazy amount of lore. I’ve tried my best to organize it in the pinned post, huge timeline, and search bar tags, but I know it’s getting harder and harder for newer ppl to jump in as it just get bigger. Thanks for reading regardless!

#rottmnt #tmnt #ask slushie #separated au #rise of the tmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt separated au #sep!au infodump #ew au #Empyrean Weeping Au

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flyawaymind · 4 months ago

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Waiting on a Miracle

I’m sure someone has probably said this better, but I just re (re re re re re re re re re) watched Encanto and had an epiphany during the song, Waiting on a Miracle.

Everything that Mirabel lists in that song? All those things she “can’t do?”

She does them, one by one, over the course of the movie. Everything she lists, whether it’s some power she wishes she had or something in her life that she wants to change, it all happens. Check it out:

The most obvious part, and what I noticed first, is how she describes the Gifts.

-I can’t move the mountains

-I can’t make the flowers bloom

-I can’t heal what’s broken

-Can’t control the morning rain or a hurricane

The language here is deliberate, and although it’s easy to write it off as lyricism or poetic phrasing for the sake of the song, this is a list of things that are caused or influenced by Mirabel’s actions in the movie. The crack down the center of town causes the mountains to split in two, Isabela’s power reaches its full potential during What Else Can I Do, and at the end of the movie Mirabel plays a big part in healing the rifts in the family. The part about the weather is less obvious, but because Pepa’s mood is tied to her Gift, I’d argue that there were probably some weird weather fluctuations when Mirabel gets Pepa to finally talk about Bruno. Mira also expertly avoids a storm by rephrasing her question about Bruno’s Gift and causes Pepa to hit Camilo with lightning when she bumps into the wall, but those are more situational than results of deliberate actions.

In other parts of the song, Mirabel talks about the things in her life that she wishes would change and things she wants to change about herself.

-I can’t take another night up in my room, waiting on a miracle

-Can’t keep down the unspoken invisible pain

-Always walking alone, always wanting for more

-Like I’m still at that door longing to shine like all of you shine

-Show this family something new

-Who I am inside, so what do I do?

The night after Antonio’s party Mirabel is lying in her room, presumably alone for the first time since Antonio was old enough to be away from Pepa for the night. She can’t sleep, and it isn’t a huge leap to conclude that she’s waiting for something to happen, whether it’s for the cracks to appear again, or for someone in her family to come talk to her, or even for the candle to finally give her a Gift because Antonio got one and maybe the magic was just a little bit delayed. The movie could have ended right there, except then Mirabel gets up. She decides to take action and comes up with a plan, no longer content to just wait for a miracle to change her life.

Everything that happens after that is related to her and her family’s catharsis and self-actualization. She stops pretending she’s ok and indirectly tells her family how hard she’s been trying to earn Alma’s love when she realizes that they’ve all been doing the same thing, and that none of it will ever be enough. Mirabel cries and screams and yells at Alma, stomping her feet and making it very clear that she isn’t content with keeping her pain hidden away. By that point the audience knows that Mirabel isn’t the only one who feels this way. Almost everyone in the family feels like they’ve been walking alone, and everyone wants to shine as bright as they think the others do. This includes Agustin and Felix: “It was easy to feel… un-ceptional.”

When the movie concludes, Mirabel’s the one who brings them all together. She reunites Bruno with their family, shows Alma the effects of her actions, and then brings about changes. She teaches the family a new way to shine, and that they’re brighter when they work together. She’s the one who opens the door, both figuratively and literally, and as she walks up to put the doorknob in place her family tells her that they finally see her as she is.

Mirabel might not have the same kind of magic, but she’s able to do everything that her magical family members can do, and more. Everything she does is laid out in Waiting on a Miracle, presented in such a way that it seems like Mirabel is hoping for something impossible. That’s something the movie teaches us: that people are often more capable than they think they are, and when everyone comes together to work toward a goal, nothing’s actually impossible.

#Encanto #disney encanto #mirabel madrigal #madrigal family #waiting on a miracle #film analysis #I’ve been thinking about this recently

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unseededtoast · 5 months ago

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Turtle Doves | Joel Miller

Part Twenty Two

Chapter Directory

Series Summary: In which two broken souls connect so deeply, that if one should perish, the other would surely die of a broken heart. (slow burn, timeline changes. After TLOU1, before TLOU2, assumed knowledge of infected, uses elements from both show and game)

Series Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence, death, and sexual content.

Also cross posted on my Wattpad and AO3, if you prefer those formats. Here is a link to my masterlist for everything else I’ve posted.

"But that night you got hurt, I enjoyed killing them. I liked hearing them die in front of me, their blood staining my hands."

Joel and I don't stay in the town for another night, we continue on. Our pace is slower than what I've become accustomed to, but Joel's wound isn't completely healed yet. The two of us have been silent after our discovery, Joel didn't have anything to say after I declared my death threat. No, instead of saying anything, he just handed me the photos and nodded solemnly.

With the two of us getting closer and closer to Omaha, I find myself feeling appreciative of Joel's slower pace. This gives us opportunities to find things we may have otherwise missed. And it also gives me more time with him. Since his near-death experience, I find myself trying to memorize the way his eyes shine golden in the sunlight, the way his voice sounds in the morning, how his shirt clings to the broadness of his shoulders, just small details. The small details are the ones I know will fade first, and I want to be able to hold onto them for as long as possible.

I know this to be fact because I can no longer quite remember what Ryan's voice really sounded like, and I can't quite remember just how soft Lucas' hair was. The simple things about them have slowly faded from my mind without me realizing it, until I thought about them one day and could never truly remember. I've never been able to forgive myself for forgetting, and I know I don't want to forget these things about Joel. After all, he's the man who has kept me alive all this time.

A part of me wishes I could be there when he's reunited with his pseudo-daughter. I wonder if he's going to tell her about this, or never mention it to her at all. She would have no idea I exist, or that Joel and I took this trip together. I know Joel is trying to protect her from the people of this world due to her immunity, so it makes sense if he never tells her about any of this. She's still a child at the end of the day, and no child should hear that there's a bunch of crazed men out there trying to find and kill them. Even if she never knows about me, or any of this, I know I'll still be able to rest peacefully at night with the knowledge that I helped protect her.

"This okay for tonight?" We stop walking as Joel points out a small, run-down gas station. It's likely the only building for miles, and so I agree to stop here for the night.

As we set up our makeshift camp, I continue to think about the girl waiting for him back in Wyoming. After hours of on-the-road thoughts, I can't help but to be fascinated with someone who is immune. It's glaringly obvious that she's one of a kind. Sure, I've known for a while that she's immune, but I think it just took some time to process it, to really understand what it means and the ramifications of it. But mostly, I just want to know how it happened. What caused her to be immune and why it's not being replicated anywhere else, that we know of.

My eyes follow Joel's form as he starts the fire for the night, my thoughts anywhere but the present. I watch how he situates the flammable material while wondering what his life is like in Wyoming and if he's excited to be back. Obviously, he's probably eager considering he's got family waiting for him. He lights the fire and the amber glow illuminates his features in soft light. His eyes look warm and inviting, the curve of his nose beautifully adorns his face with unique character, the plumpness of his lips reflect with the drink of water he just took. As if he feels my eyes lingering on him, he looks over and meets my gaze.

"What's on your mind?" He asks, shifting back from the fire a few feet as it takes flame. My eyes dance between him and the fire, debating if I should confess or not.

"I um, I've just been thinking about a lot of things." It's not a complete lie, I guess. Orange flames rise and dissipate, crackling in front of us.

"About what? You've been quiet since this morning." Instead of confiding in him my most recent thoughts, I decide to unload the other thing that's been bothering me for a while now, since he was stabbed. With a sigh and a quick lick of my lips, I tell him my moral dilemma.

"I've never been one to enjoy taking a life. Didn't like it when I was on FEDRA gate duty, and I didn't like it when we ran into the Fireflies. But that night you got hurt, I enjoyed killing them. I liked hearing them die in front of me, their blood staining my hands. And I've been having these thoughts of what it's going to feel like to kill these people. It's almost anticipatory." Our eyes stay locked on one another as I speak, my words quiet and somber. With a shaky breath, I continue,

"And I'm not sure what that makes me. Am I really any different from them if I look forward to killing?" My throat constricts, like my body doesn't want me to voice my fear. The silence between us is palpable and dread grows in me with each second Joel doesn't say something. Not being able to handle the criticism when he opens his mouth, I focus on the fire.

"Doesn't make you a bad person, if that's what you're worried about." He finally speaks, and his words catch me off guard, the total opposite of what I was expecting.

"Then what does it make me? Because it isn't good." My voice cracks. I know it's not fair to be asking him these questions, but, I can't stop from asking them. He shifts his weight to his other side and leans forward slightly, looking deeper into my eyes and I fear if he looks too hard he'll be able to see right into my soul.

"Makes you human. Means you have purpose, something worth protecting. Or, in your case, a ledger to balance." There is no trace of anything but authenticity as he speaks, his words settling into my mind. My eyebrows come close together as I mull over what he's said and I realize he may be right.

"You know I really thought you were going to die that night." I change the subject slightly, not wanting to admit to him that he's becoming my 'something to protect' and a part of my 'ledger to balance'.

"And if I did I suppose it was just my time." He relaxes his posture as if the thought of death is no more stressful than deciding what he's going to wear the next day.

"Don't say that." I shake my head, not wanting any more images of his dead body in my mind. The one from this morning, from the photos, still haven't left my mind. Each time they pop up behind my eyelids, it instills a new fear in me each time.

"You did a damn good stitch job." He tries to lighten the mood, pulling up the hem of his shirt to show the still intact sutures.

"It's a wonder you didn't bleed out. Do you even remember what happened?" I'm not entirely sure how much he saw, or what he remembers. To answer my question, he shakes his head.

"Not really, just remember you gettin' there and the rest is just kind of-" He motions with his hands that his memory of the night has become scrambled.

"One of them got you real good with their machete. I stuffed the wound with my shirt to try to stop the bleed and then I had to get you to another building. On the ground just outside of where we ended up there was one of their torches, barely still burning on the sidewalk. So I took it and heated the blade of my hunting knife, then I cauterized the cut. Found the sewing supplies when I was looking around and just did my best. Truthfully, you lost a lot of blood, like, way too much." I give him the brief recounting of the night. His fingers lightly trace the stitching before he meets my eyes again.

"Thank you." He tenderly says, dropping the hem of his shirt.

"It was the least I could do." I shrug one of my shoulders. The silence between us returns for a few more moments before Joel announces that he's going to get some sleep for the night. I tell him I'm going to as well, but end up staying awake.

After a while, the flames of the fire begin dying off but my eyes remain affixed to the back of Joel. The shirt across his shoulders is drawn tight, battling to stay intact. His dark curls are barely brushing the collar of the shirt, more prominent from the humidity of the day. As my eyes wander down his solid form, the chain around my neck seems to burn my skin. Disgust with myself boils up from within, and I force myself to look away from Joel.

My gaze turns up to the ceiling and I try to flood my mind with how Ryan sounded, how he felt, how he loved me. Bits and pieces come back, like how his hand felt on my cheek, how solid his chest felt when I hugged him, but I cannot remember his voice. I can feel the timbre of it, but can't place the true tone and inflection. Tears well in my lower lash line as I accept that I genuinely can't remember him fully anymore. I've known for a while that certain things have faded, but I never took the time to mourn that loss, I have not allowed myself to mourn Ryan the way I should have all those years ago.

My hands curl into frustrated fists, my nails digging crescent shapes into my palm as silent tears run down my face. Tears of guilt for forgetting, tears of sadness because I can no longer remember all of my husband. Tears of fear because I realize that I may be falling in love with another man; one whom I cannot be with. I grit my teeth together in lieu of screaming and a hollow feeling opens in my chest.

Moving faster than my mind can keep up, I go outside where the air hits the wetness of my face and sends a shiver down my spine. Once I'm sure that I'm far enough to where Joel can't hear me, I let myself cry. With each ragged breath I take my chest heaves up and down unevenly. Tears uncontrollably run down my face and I grip the chain around my neck tightly, wishing I could just have one more second with my family, wishing I could feel the warmth of their skin on mine, to tell them how much I love them one final time. Hoping and praying that my love for them and their absence is enough to stave off the feeling blooming inside of me for Joel.

All through the past ten years I've yearned to have my family back, there's been a hole in my heart, a void that has never been filled since outbreak day. A void that hasn't been hurting as much the past couple of weeks. I've always missed Ryan and Lucas, but lately their absence has been a dull ache as opposed to the sharp stabbing I'm used to. I'm not sure what this means, because I know I love and miss them vehemently. But I also know how I feel about Joel.

Unable to stay standing, I lower myself to my knees, burying my face in my hands. My eyes squeeze shut and the tears fall off the ends of my eyelashes. Guilt overtakes me as I remember how on outbreak night Ryan protected Lucas and I to the best of his ability. How he told me he loved me, and that we were going to be alright. If only I had turned that corner first. Why was I the one to survive, but they had to die?

Guilt burns into anger and I blame myself for what happened. If only I had been brave enough to go first, then maybe they would still be on this Earth. I know they could've forged a life for themselves somewhere. Meanwhile I was content being shipped everywhere and ended up being a lowly pill runner. Why couldn't that FEDRA guard have shot the infected two seconds earlier and spared them? It just isn't right.

Sobs strain my throat while I try to stay quiet and I use the sleeve of my button up to wipe my nose. The stars above me shine brightly and I stare at them, stray tears falling down my cheeks. If only they could reach out to me and let me know that wherever they are, that they're together and they're not suffering, that they're not angry at me for feeling this way about Joel.

Ryan and Lucas will never be able to be replaced, they will always occupy a special place in my heart. I know I can never have them back with me physically, yet I know that they are forever with me, tethered to the very fiber of my being. But I feel that my heart is opening up a new spot, and I'm not sure I'll be able to kill whatever is blooming. I'm not sure I want to.

With wide eyes I search the sky for some sort of sign, some indication that my feelings are right or wrong. But my search is cut short when I hear the door of the gas station open. Quickly, I use the sleeve of my shirt to wipe my face and hope that the darkness of night will conceal my puffy face. As my head turns to face Joel, I can almost swear I see a streak of light in the sky. But by the time I do a double take, whatever I thought I saw, is gone.

"Are you okay?" Joel's voice cautiously asks as he slowly approaches me. The stars are shining so bright tonight that I can see the familiar crease between his brows. His boots crunch softly on the loose pebbles on the pavement and I nod my head, trying to stabilize my breathing.

"I'm okay." My voice betrays me as I speak, it comes out hoarse. Joel comes to my side, and lowers himself next to me, crouching instead of resting on his knees.

"Why don't you come back inside? I'll get the fire started up again." I feel his eyes on me as I stare back at the sky, one last lone tear sliding down my cheek. Joel's words are smooth as honey, calming and soft. A gust of wind blows past us, sending another shiver up my body.

Joel must see the slight quiver as the breeze passes, and he puts an arm around my shoulders, the other under my elbow, and he helps me back to my feet. He keeps his arm gently wrapped around me as we go back to the gas station, and I lean into his touch out of instinct. Before we enter the building, I stop and take one last look at the sky, hopeful to see whatever it was that zoomed past when Joel stepped outside just to confirm what I think it was. But nothing happens.

I step back into the building in front of Joel, who works to get the fire reignited. My body begins to physically calm down from my crying, jagged breaths turn into hiccups. The first one shocks us both, but after the second I think I can almost see a tiny smile on Joel's face. However, when he turns to me after the fire is rebuilt all signs of a smile are gone and is instead replaced with a caring expression. Joel's dark brown eyes are wide and I see how his eyes look over my face, his shoulders aren't tight and rigid, he almost looks relaxed.

He walks over to me and leads me to what I've claimed as my spot for the night, marked by my backpack. Gingerly, he sits me down and crouches by my side once more, moving a rogue strand of hair out of my face that was plastered to my cheek from the tears. His fingers are warm against my face, and he lets them linger there for just a second longer than he needs to. My eyes slowly blink, appreciative of the contact. He licks his lips and his eyes look over my face once more, trying to piece together what's wrong.

"You don't have to tell me why, but I just need to know that you're alright, that you're not hurt." I look into his eyes that are inches from me and I nod with another hiccup jolting through me.

"I'm not hurt." My hoarse voice confirms to him and I wipe my cheeks with the back of my hand to dry them fully. I feel that my eyes are puffy, my lips swollen from keeping quiet and I hope I don't look as disheveled as I feel inside.

"Okay." Joel nods and only then does he back away from me. Though I wish he would stay. However, I know that with my uncertain emotions, that it's probably better he that he doesn't. For his sake. He doesn't need to be roped into my personal shit show.

Every few minutes a hiccup interrupts the quiet, and each time I see Joel struggle to keep a smile at bay. I'll admit, they do sound a little ridiculous and if I weren't so upset I'd probably laugh at them too. But as my hiccups calm down, I find myself transfixed by the dancing flames.

Perhaps I needed to come to terms with my reality, accept my losses, and understand how Ryan and Lucas are still a part of me to be okay with something new. And perhaps this something new is for the better. Even if it doesn't work out, at least I know I'm still human enough, capable enough, to keep going.

Twenty Three

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