#OH and also ! i figured out how to add tags into links ! now there’s a link to ye olde clown edits on my intro post !!!!!! 🥀🌹

[thedeadthree]

besties and mutuals who play fallout nv on pc if y’all know a way to keep it from crashing i would owe you my life 🥀✨🥹

[5ummit]

New Mature Content Warning Overlay (And How to Get Rid of It)

More fun community label "features"! Unlike the new mandatory label for #NSFW, this one is a bigger deal to me because it affects my entire blog and it can't be avoided by just using a different tag.

Apparently on custom blog layouts, if you happen to post or reblog even a SINGLE post that's been flagged with the mature content community label, a full-page warning overlay will appear blurring out your entire blog that must be manually clicked through every single time the page is refreshed. At first I thought this was just a bug due to my older layout but I've come to realize it's not. It's a feature (as confirmed by this recent changes post) that affects all custom themes. The formatting will vary based on your own theme but here's what it looks like on my blog:

I don't know about you but I find this is stupid and annoying. If it could be dismissed once and never seen again that might be one thing, but that's not the case. The vast majority of my blog is not "mature" enough to warrant such an aggressive and invasive warning. I also think pop-ups are obnoxious in general and I'll be damned if tumblr's going to force me to have one on MY blog.

After some desperate googling for a known workaround and being unable to find even a single mention of it, I decided to take on the challenge myself. I'm not a theme coder, so apologies if there's a better way to do this, but luckily it only took me like 10 minutes to figure out a simple fix, which I'm now sharing with anyone else who may want it:

.community-label-cover__wrapper {display: none}

Just copypaste that somewhere in your CSS and goodbye pop-up!

If you're not sure how to access your theme code, check out this help article. You can also add the code via the Advanced Options menu, which is actually even better (if you can get it to work, it depends on how your theme was coded), because it will then automatically be reapplied to a lot of themes without having to remember to manually add it every time if you change your theme in the future.

Obviously this will only remove it from your own blog for anyone who may visit it. If you never want to see this warning again on other people's blogs you can also add this custom filter to your ad block:

tumblr.com##.community-label-cover__wrapper

Unfortunately I do not have an easy tutorial on hand for this one as the method will depend on your specific ad block app or extension.

Some additional notes:

After adding the theme code and saving the changes, give it a minute to update as it sometimes takes a little while for the page to refresh.

The warning overlay only seems to appear if a "mature" post is on the FIRST page of your blog, which is still annoying and makes the whole thing even more pointless and stupid because what if someone visits any other page of your blog, and oh no, happens to see "mature" content they weren't warned about?!

The warning also appears on direct links to "mature" posts.

This hack has NOTHING to do with entire blogs that have been flagged as NSFW. It only works for non-flagged blogs with custom themes that happen to have individual "mature" posts.

[retrievablememories]

cherry bomb | part 2 | jungkook (m)

pairing: jungkook x fem reader

summary: after your town goes into lockdown because of the cherry bomb massacre, you find out that the murderer's interest is on you. eventually, you’re left with no choice but to face him.

genre: horror/slasher, angst, smut, college!au

word count: 13.7k

warnings: major character deaths, gaslighting, hallucinations, anxiety/paranoia, grief, trauma, violence (including knife and gun use), torture, blood, gore, descriptions of dead bodies, a funeral scene, fuckboy!JK, oral (fem receiving), fingering, finger-sucking, handjob, cumplay(?), hair-pulling

a/n: this part is quite rougher than the first, so heed the warnings. same notes as the last part—not meant to be entirely realistic since this *is* a slasher. block/filter as needed. i didn’t mention this in part 1 but this fic is not set in present day; more like somewhere in the 2000s? i don’t think this fic would work as well with all this advanced technology/the prevalence of social media now

...also, i had this story all written out and then decided to completely change the plot at the last minute because i figured out a way to write the original plot i had wanted to do from the beginning. 💀 yeah…just leave your thoughts below

taglist is at the very bottom of the fic—for some reason i wasn't able to tag everyone who requested, so please reblog this fic so folks can see it

sources for the fic dividers: one | two

link to part 1

you’re standing in front of some stranger’s house in the early hours of the morning, your body heavy from exhaustion as your adrenaline has run out. this is not at all how you expected your night to end when you left your dorm hours ago. it must’ve taken at least 40 minutes to get to this house, and you’re less familiar with this part of town, which you try not to feel uneasy about. you suppose the farther away from the scene of the carnage, the better.

jungkook bangs on the door, calling out the name yoongi-hyung until the porch light comes on. though it’s illogical, you’re tense with apprehension that the murderer could somehow appear at any moment, and you hope whoever yoongi is lets the both of you in soon. so much for no longer looking over your shoulder.

a man with hair just as long as jungkook’s answers the door, looking disheveled and annoyed. “why the fuck are you banging down my door at nearly 2 am—"

yoongi stops speaking as he eyes the both of you up and down, his gaze going from the bite mark bruises you left on jungkook’s neck to the dried blood on your face to the bullet holes in jungkook’s car. his expression is between surprise and curiosity. “what the fuck is going on here?”

“can we talk inside?” jungkook says, though he doesn’t wait for an invitation before pushing his way past the other man and stepping inside.

“uh…hi. sorry.” you step inside too, glad to not be out in the open anymore.

yoongi takes another look outside the door at the state of jungkook’s car before closing and locking it. “mind explaining this shit? i thought you were going to that party you told me about?

“i did,” jungkook says, his voice full of frustration. “the fucking killer showed up at the party.”

“the fuck are you talking about?”

“you know what i’m talking about. that werewolf-masked freak? he came and just started stabbing people to death. we watched him shoot a fraternity member in front of us, dude. that’s why my car looks the way it does.”

“the campus is probably dangerous,” you add. “that’s why we came here. we just need somewhere safe to stay for the night.”

yoongi goes to the window and draws back the curtain. he peeks out the small holes in the side of the blinds rather than pushing the blinds down to look outside. “and you’re certain he didn’t follow you here? i thought he only killed virgins anyway. why the hell was he shooting at you?” then yoongi turns away from the window and looks at you. “oh. is this why?”

feeling put on the spot, you blurt out: “look, i don’t think that matters much anymore. he seemed to be killing anybody who was in his way.”

“and he was on foot the whole time, so there’s no way he could’ve followed us,” jungkook adds.

yoongi shakes his head and walks away from the window. “whole town is fucked, then. come on.”

you’re relieved to be able to scrub the blood off your face and change into fresh clothes. you initially thought it was peculiar that yoongi had spare clothes ready for you to wear until he alluded to keeping them on hand for any of jungkook’s hookups that he brings over.

“sure—of course.” you’d just nodded and tried not to look embarrassed as you accepted the clothes.

even after showering you don’t feel entirely clean, though. you think it might be impossible to return to feeling anything like your former self after tonight.

the couch has a pull-out bed, so it’s not as uncomfortable as it would be just sleeping on a regular sofa, which you are grateful for. you’re still arranging the pillow and blankets when jungkook walks into the room holding his own bedding.

“i think i should sleep here,” he says.

“there’s no room on the couch for the both of us,” you protest, thinking he means to take your spot.

“i mean on the floor. earlier, you didn’t seem like you wanted to be left alone in here.”

“oh.” you try to take the edge out of your voice; it’s hard to be polite when you’re still so overwhelmed with stress. “that’ll be uncomfortable though.”

jungkook just waves his hand and dumps his pillow and blanket on the floor before going to push the coffee table out of the way. “doesn’t really matter, i think we’ve been through worse tonight than sleeping on a hard floor…”

“thanks,” you say quietly, watching him spread his blanket out on the ground. you want to say something else, but you can’t think of anything.

“it’s fine, don’t worry about it.”

after a few more moments of staring at jungkook as he arranges his sleeping area, you finally ask, “i was wondering how’d you meet yoongi? he doesn’t seem like he’s a college student. i’ve never seen him around our campus, at least.”

“he isn’t. he works as a music producer, so he’s out of town a lot, but this is his homebase. as for how we met—it’s a long story. he and my brother actually used to know each other, so…” you think he’ll explain further, but he just shakes his head. “but he’s a good friend.”

“i see. a music producer…nice. how cool for a little town like this.”

after everything is to his liking, jungkook gets under the blanket. “tonight was a lot, so try to get some sleep.”

you nod and turn the lamp off, though you’re doubting you’ll get any peace tonight. “yeah…you too.”

--

SATURDAY MORNING, NOV 4

you wake up around 11 a.m. on a strange couch wearing strange clothes in a strange room. with your brain’s half-conscious state, your terror reawakens; you think maybe you’ve been kidnapped by the murderer and the car ride with jungkook last night was a dream—until yoongi pops into your mind.

you try to regulate your breathing and settle back beneath the blanket, though you know you won’t be going back to sleep.

you haven’t gotten more than an hour of sleep in total, broken up into 20-minute intervals across the hours. every time you’ve tried to close your eyes and drift off, you see the frat member’s skull bursting apart again, shocking your entire nervous system. you can think of nothing but the piles of bodies and the deaths you witnessed. perhaps it’s better that you don’t sleep; you figure your dreams wouldn’t be any more tolerable than your thoughts.

as you shift around on the couch, your whole body screams with soreness. your arms, your ribs, your sides, your legs, and—to a lesser extent—even between your thighs where jungkook was last night.

you glance over and see that he’s still sprawled on the floor, blanket halfway kicked off. he’s actually awake, his face turned away from you as he blinks slowly and stares at nothing, but he doesn’t say anything and so neither do you. with you spending most of your night awake, you saw that he was able to get more rest than you did. lucky him.

it hurts to move, but you reach for your phone and check for any signs of lorelai. none. there is one text from camille, sent 40 minutes ago.

➤ camille: I talked to Lorelai’s sister. She went to go see about a missing persons report. The police took her information but didn’t seem very concerned about it and said she might have just stayed the night with other friends after the party. Apparently a lot of others had the same idea as you. Campus is a ghost town. They’re still identifying all the bodies, so no word yet.

➤ y/n: so we just have to sit here and wait to see if she’ll turn up alive or dead? that’s useless.

➤ camille: As per fucking usual with the pigs.

➤ camille: She also told me there’s supposed to be a lockdown or something. It’s on the news.

➤ y/n: a lockdown???

looking around the room, you spot the TV remote sitting on yoongi’s coffee table a few feet away. you try to sit up, but it takes you a couple minutes longer than you anticipate because of the pain. jungkook notices the movement from the corner of his eye and turns to look at you. “what are you doing?”

“tryna get the remote.”

jungkook grabs it and hands it to you, and you turn the TV to one of the local news channels.

➤ camille: They’re telling people not to leave their homes for anything non-essential while they search for him. Not sure how long that’s supposed to last. I guess now they wanna get serious about this fucking killer? Too late for that.

you and jungkook watch as the newscaster gives a rundown of last night’s events; to your small relief, it looks like the killer didn’t try to go to the campus after the murders at the party house. the newscaster goes on to announce that the police are instating a citywide curfew, which they’ll discuss further at a press conference in the afternoon. in the meantime, they advise everyone to only travel in groups, shelter in place if possible, and keep all windows and doors locked.

you laugh humorlessly, and jungkook glances at you again. “in groups? we were all packed into one damn house at the party, and how much did that help?”

➤ y/n: are you sure you’re okay at the uni?

➤ camille: I’m fine. My roommate brought some of her friends into our room so no one’s left alone. Either way, my dad is coming to help me move some of my things out and come back home.

➤ y/n: okay, please just stay safe.

➤ camille: You too.

“what now?” jungkook says once the newscast goes off. “everybody just stays holed up for like a month while they hunt for that guy?”

you roll your eyes. “people won’t stay in their homes for that long. i don’t know how any of this is gonna work. we wouldn’t be in this mess now if they’d cared when this first started happening.”

“you think so? students would still be getting killed. the only difference is that a good chunk of people would just be sitting at home freaking the fuck out and too scared to go anywhere while the killer would still be on the loose.”

“…damn. it’s truly bleak to assume we’d still be in the same situation. you’re an optimistic one.”

“better than deluding yourself about it.”

“whatever. where’s your family to freak out over you? somebody should be concerned about your whereabouts by now. didn’t you say you have a brother? speaking of, i’m gonna have to call my sister soon…”

jungkook turns back to the TV, and you can tell he’s become more tense than he was seconds ago. “yeah, but i’m estranged from them. yoongi’s my family.”

wrong thing to ask. you wonder about the reason for it but decide it’s probably better not to pry. “ah…that sucks.”

jungkook looks back at you like he’s irked by that response, but he makes a noise resembling a chuckle. “tell me about it.”

later that afternoon, after you’ve reassured your sister veronica on her work break that you are fine and at a “friend’s” house (because you have no clue how to refer to either of these men), you and yoongi sit at the kitchen table with brunch while jungkook goes outside to examine the damage to his car more closely.

it’s difficult to eat, but you do so anyway; you don’t want to be rude by wasting the food yoongi made. the news station still plays loudly from the living room as you wait for the press conference to come on.

“so, about you and jungkook...” yoongi starts, looking at you from over the rim of his cup of coffee.

“what about me and jungkook?”

“we both know he didn’t get those bites on his neck from a wild animal attack.”

you sit up straighter in your seat, a sudden spike of irritation hitting you. “aren’t we all grown here? who cares?” you try to sound unbothered despite feeling very green about all of this. after all, you’d only had sex for the first time last night.

“look, i don’t care. fuck him all you want. i’m just trying to advise you not to get emotionally involved, because that’s not how jungkook operates. the amount of girls i’ve had somehow coming after my neck when their situationship with him doesn’t work out is starting to get really old. it’d be best if you didn’t do the same.”

you’re simultaneously annoyed at his assumption of you and flustered because you want to prove him wrong about acting the same as the other girls. you hate both feelings. “i don’t want anything like that with him. i just needed something done and i got it. it doesn’t matter anymore.”

yoongi shrugs, and you get the sense he’s heard that before and isn’t convinced, but you can’t be bothered going back and forth with him about this.

the press conference comes on TV a few minutes later. they announce that classes at your university are cancelled indefinitely; parents and relatives will need to come move their students out, and the school will be operating with a skeleton staff and increased security presence for any students who can’t leave the campus. the citywide curfew will be at 8 p.m. every night, by which time almost everyone will need to be in their homes, and it will end at 6 a.m each morning.

“fun,” you say sarcastically. “at least i won’t have to worry about finals and trying not to get murdered at the same time.”

when jungkook comes back inside, you let him know about what he missed from the press conference.

“we should just stay here for now.” when you raise your eyebrows, jungkook says, “i basically live here when i’m not on campus for classes. plus yoongi-hyung lets me bring girls here all the time, this is nothing new.”

“if both of you are gonna be hiding out in my place, we’ll need to go to the store,” yoongi says. “more mouths to feed.”

“…or i could just go home?” you propose, your mind reeling at them already making plans. you feel awkward about staying in a stranger’s house for who knows how long. “i think we only really needed to stay here for the night. it’s fine.”

“will you have people there with you?” jungkook asks. “it’s not safe to be alone.”

you’re surprised he seems to be this concerned, but you answer: “well, i mean…my sister works 12-hour shifts as a nurse and she’s the only one living there, so…” you’d chosen your university because your older sister lived in the area, and because it was a tradition for women in your family to attend that school, but there were no other relatives you could turn to. your parents lived a couple of towns away.

yoongi comes to the conclusion so you don’t have to. “in other words, you’ll be alone most of the day.”

“…i guess. but i’m really not tryna impose on you by staying here.”

yoongi tilts his head, a small smirk on his lips. you automatically dislike the look on his face. “why don’t you take jungkook with you, then?”

you and jungkook glance at each other. “but, hyung…”

yoongi shakes his head. “you already know i can take care of myself. seriously, don’t worry about it.” and then yoongi winks at you. you don’t know for sure, but you take that to mean he’s probably packing heat like camille’s dad.

“if you’re sure.” turning to you, jungkook says, “so, how about it?”

“it’s my sister’s house, so i’ll have to ask her,” you say tentatively. “yeah…uh. let me do that now, i guess.” you pull out your phone to text her about it, though you know it’ll be a while before she gets another work break and can answer. “in the meantime…i think we’ll need to go to the store either way. and then to campus to pick our things up.”

“you’re right. let’s go then,” jungkook says.

the store is full of people panic-buying food and necessities in preparation for the curfew and effective lockdown, which you expected. you and jungkook end up going your separate ways to find the things you need because it’s quicker that way, and because you want to get in and out of the store as soon as possible. the crowdedness is too much like the party, and despite yourself, anxiety begins rising in you due to the claustrophobic atmosphere. you try to maintain even breaths as you keep searching for items. just what you need—a shiny new trauma to make your life harder.

you pass by a man in one of the less-crowded aisles before realizing he’s standing in front of what you need to get, examining one of the food packages. you wait a few moments to see if he’ll finish up soon, and when your eyes begin to wander, you see that there’s a long gray hair clinging to the back of his leather jacket, standing out clearly against the black. you probably wouldn’t have noticed this at all on any other day, except your mind has been on high alert for hours now; you find it strange that this strand clearly doesn’t match the shade or length of the hair on his head, which is short and plain brown. the shade of the hair also weirdly reminds you of something, though you can’t quite recall what; it remains just out of your mind’s reach.

you shake your head. he could’ve come to the store with somebody who has long gray hair, or hugged them before he left home, and a strand stuck to his jacket. it’s the least of your issues right now.

the man must feel your presence behind him because he turns around to look at you. you’re a little taken aback by his gaze; his expression isn’t mean per se, but very intense, as if his entire focus is trained on you.

there’s a second’s pause, like he’s thinking about something before he speaks. “am i in your way?” he asks, never breaking eye contact. his voice doesn’t portray any particular emotion.

“i just have to get something really quick.” he steps aside and gestures to the rows of food without a word. you slip in beside him and grab what you need before moving away again. “thanks.” you think about telling him about the hair on his jacket but decide against it; your decision is solidified when you spot a wolf figurine keychain on his keys, faded from time but still distinguishable. it makes your breath catch.

there’s no way it could be him. it was kind of dark in the party house with nothing but string lights and lamps illuminating it, and everything happened so quickly…but you do remember the colors of that mask. red, yellow, black—and that dark gray for the fur.

but maybe it’s really all just a coincidence; how much sense would it make to turn every person with wolf paraphernalia and random stray hairs into a suspect?

you walk down the rest of the aisle and away from the man with growing unease. maybe it’s time to find jungkook so you can get out of here; you can hardly keep yourself together, and despite your best attempts at logic, you can’t stop yourself from getting more frantic about those two things.

speeding up your walk and weaving through people, you look down every aisle in search for jungkook before you find him, rushing over to him as you breathe heavily.

“whoa, what the hell is wrong? did somebody do something?”

“no, i…”

“what happened?”

“it’s the…well, the…i saw, uh…”

“y/n.”

“i saw—the mask. the fur from the mask. do you remember it?”

“…you mean that stupid ass werewolf mask?” you gesture for jungkook to lower his voice. “wait, you’re saying you saw it in here?”

“no, i saw a man who had a strand of hair on his jacket…” it starts sounding ridiculous to your own ears the more you speak, but you continue. “the strand—it was the same color as that fur. the same length! and he—he had some weird wolf keychain…”

jungkook stares at you for a long moment before sighing. “you’re not serious? a random strand of hair that could be from anybody or anything? that could be from someone’s fucking grandma for all we know. plus a keychain…maybe he just likes wolves, y/n.”

you already know that saying i just feel like something is off won’t be enough to convince him. you sigh with a deep sense of defeat, considering that he’s probably right. maybe your initial assumption was the more sensible answer. “…right. i think i’m just really fucked up right now after everything that happened. can we finish up here?”

“yeah, we will. because you definitely need to lay down soon or something. you haven’t had any sleep all night, right?” the way jungkook eyes you with concern as if you’ve lost your mind annoys you. you’re about to give a smart remark when you notice something in the carrying-basket he has.

“…a baseball bat?”

“if the killer comes after us again, duh. we’ll be prepared this time. or at least i will.”

“good luck with that if he happens to have another gun.” rolling your eyes, you brush past jungkook to go to one of the checkout counters.

in the parking lot, you see that the man from earlier has also come out and is putting the last of his grocery bags into his car trunk. there’s really nothing spectacular about his appearance that would make him stand out in a crowd, with his average height and average looks, let alone incriminate him as a serial killer. yet that familiar unease won’t leave.

he sees you and jungkook walking towards the car together, and his eyes dart to the bullet holes in jungkook’s car. then he makes eye contact with you. you give a half-hearted wave, unsure what else to do with his eyes stuck on you. for a moment, his lips turn up into the faintest smile before he shakes his head and gets into his own car.

--

MONDAY, NOV 6

you’ve spent half of saturday and all of sunday trying to get used to living in your sister’s house with jungkook. veronica had been surprisingly okay with having him stay over, though most of it was her being relieved you finally found “a potential boyfriend who’s actually cute.” you didn’t have the energy to argue with her.

you’ve also been constantly checking on camille (to her eventual annoyance) and seeing if there are any more updates on lorelai. still nothing. your dread grows the further away you get from that bloody friday, but you try to keep your thoughts from straying too darkly.

right now, you, veronica, and jungkook all sit on the couch together in a neat little row, a bowl of popcorn in front of you on the coffee table and some science-fiction B-movie playing on the TV. your sister proposed the idea to distract yourselves from everything going on, but so far, you feel like it isn’t very effective. at least not for you. your mind keeps wandering to other things every 5 minutes.

eventually, veronica yawns widely, stretching her arms and legs before rising off the couch. “okay, i’m getting tired as fuck. i need to go to sleep for work tomorrow anyway. you guys enjoy the rest of the movie, okay?” she pats your shoulder as she passes by you on her way out of the room.

jungkook waves. “oh, sure. goodnight.”

“night, sis.”

when jungkook’s attention goes back to the movie, your sister makes eye contact with you and points her finger at you menacingly. you give her a shocked look while she mouths you know what i mean and swirls her finger in jungkook’s direction. embarrassed at the implication, you roll your eyes and turn your head back to the TV screen. having sex with jungkook on your sister’s couch is not high on your list of priorities tonight.

after your sister is gone, jungkook spreads out on the couch like it’s his own living room, placing his legs right over your lap. you sigh, looking over at him—and hoping that your eyes don’t linger too obviously on the expanse of thigh muscle that’s now on display from his shorts riding up higher.

“…really? i don’t want your big ole legs in my lap.”

jungkook just grins. “you should lay down too, it’s more comfortable this way.” you stare at him, and he tries to egg you on by pulling the sleeve of your shirt. “come on.”

“i’m not laying down on top of you, if that’s what you’re after.”

you do end up lying down, but on the opposite side of the couch so that your legs are tangled together, which really just increases the amount of contact between you either way—but whatever.

this makes jungkook laugh more. “ha, it’s like we’re scissoring.”

“so damn corny.”

you two continue watching the rest of the movie, but by the end of it you don’t remember half of what happened. taking the remote, you flip through the channels and try to find something else to look at. there isn’t much interesting to watch on a random monday night—which would be a school night anyway, if not for the current context.

as you search for a channel, jungkook asks: “what would you do if you found out who the killer was?”

you squint your eyes at his odd question. maybe the obvious answer would be to alert the police. but after days of having your anger stoked like a fire, that’s not exactly the answer you’d choose. “maybe i’d kill him.” the words leave your lips easily, and you hardly think twice about them once they’re out.

neither of you speak for a few long moments.

“does that scare you?” you ask, after the silence starts annoying you. you want to laugh, but there’s nothing really funny about the situation.

“…not really. angry women are kinda sexy. so are dangerous ones.”

you scoff. “i’m not tryna be sexy, you fool. and how many dangerous women have you dealt with? seems to me you only have a thing for the innocents.”

“it’s not like i only fuck virgins. you don’t even know me like that.” he nudges your leg with his foot like he’s also annoyed, but his expression doesn’t show any actual irritation.

“…if you want to go back and forth about it, go outside and argue with the wall or something. i’m in no mood, jungkook.” you shove his foot off of you. “just, holy shit. i wish i could have just one hour where i don’t have to think about any of this shit. my mind can’t even breathe.”

he’s actually quiet for a couple minutes after. you think he’s moved on from the conversation until he finally says, “i can give you an hour.”

your body becomes alert at that. the insinuation in his tone is obvious. you glance backwards as if your sister could hear you from upstairs, though you know that’s illogical. “i got what i wanted from you already,” you whisper.

“so? what if i wanted to give you more? you know you’re allowed to have sex with a person more than once, yeah?” he chuckles.

here he is making you this offer, and once again you feel like you’ve been reduced to the state of a confused lamb in front of a hungry wolf. you realize that the idea of letting yourself get more physically entangled with jungkook scares you. he is not someone you can turn into a boyfriend, who wants to be a boyfriend, and you are only looking to save yourself from any potential hurt. “it would just be sex—right? you have to know i’m not looking for anything deeper from you.”

jungkook smirks. like with yoongi, you don’t know if he believes you. “i know.”

you want to undo almost everything from the past few days. you can’t forget, but for a while, you want to just exist outside of the timeline where there’s a killer on the loose and one of your friends is missing. it’s too much to handle; your body is approaching its limits for the amount of stress it can take. you need a balm to numb the pain and the fear, and you dislike that you are giving into your base instincts to do so. you feel guilty, somehow. but pleasure is easy. at least it has been whenever you sought it on your own—and now you have someone else to give it to you. someone who is in front of you now, proposing it with all the willingness in the world. maybe there’s really nothing wrong with saying yes.

“jungkook…”

“hm?”

“please just shut the fuck up and don’t say another word about the outside world right now. i don’t want to think about anything but your…” you falter, still trying to get used to expressing what you want sexually.

jungkook sits up, his hands sliding up your legs and to your hips. “but my what?”

“um, your…” your thoughts end when he leans down and pulls the hem of your sweater up, planting a kiss on your waist where your skin meets the waistband of your sweatpants. one kiss turns into a second, and a third. the fourth becomes an open-mouthed embrace of his lips on your skin, and you make a small noise of pleasure when his tongue gets involved.

“careful. don’t want veronica to come down here, remember?”

you huff. “that isn’t happening any time soon, believe me.”

his kisses continue as he begins to slide your sweatpants down, revealing the waistband of your panties. once they’re fully on display, he leans forward to nuzzle his face between your thighs, his mouth and nose pressing into the seat of your underwear. his actions take you off guard. you actually give a brief chuckle from surprise, though you are also somewhat embarrassed. “now what the hell are you doing?”

“let me savor my meal before i eat it.” his warm breaths tickle your inner thighs as he speaks.

“ugh, don’t turn me off.”

“that’s funny, because i seem to have an easy time getting you wet.” to prove it, his fingers press into the seat of your underwear to feel the wetness that’s seeped into them; you sigh from the brief pleasure his fingers’ movements afford you before he pulls them away.

jungkook drags your panties down next, his lips trailing down your lower abdomen and across the curls of hair covering your pubic mound. your body fills with anticipation at the gradual pace of his actions and the purposeful, wet caresses of his mouth.

when he uses his thumbs to press your lower lips apart and expose you more fully to him, you have half a mind to be self-conscious about it until he places his mouth on you in earnest.

jungkook eats like someone who hasn’t done so in a while and doesn’t know when he’ll get to do it again. his mouth sucks at your clit like he’s desperate for you to come, tongue rolling over the swollen nub in an unrelenting pattern that has your stomach tensing, and you quickly realize you do have to try to silence yourself even if you know it won’t wake veronica up. you twist your hands into the sleeves of your sweater and lean your head back on the couch’s armrest as you arch your hips up closer to jungkook’s face, uncaring about how vulnerable you feel completely offering yourself up to him like this; right now, all you want is to feel good.

“gonna come quick again? maybe we can set a new record?” jungkook pins your knee against the couch with his elbow to keep your legs open as he slides two fingers inside, diving straight in instead of working you up this time. your body breaks out in a sweat and you know you really won’t last long once he does this, the tips of his fingers aiming for that dreadful, wonderful, and overpowering place inside you. you don’t know how people do this—you feel like you’re going to die when he stimulates that spot, and all you want to do is scream even though you can’t.

“a r-record? fuck off…” you choke out, though you begin to rock your hips into the rhythm of his fingers, needing so badly for him to take you over the edge again.

he chuckles. “i don’t think you want me to fuck off right now.”

you have no words for a good comeback when he buries his head between your legs and slurps at your pussy again and crooks his fingers repeatedly to where your orgasm is unexpectedly rushing down upon you, causing your body to tense as you gasp and stifle any sounds that escape with your sweater sleeve.

jungkook doesn’t stop there and you don’t really expect him to, because you’re beginning to learn he isn’t a one-and-done type of man. he keeps sucking and stroking you right into another releasewhile you push the beanie off his head, fist your fingers into his strands, and tremble over the sight of his pitch-black mess of hair between your thighs. something about the visual is so appealing to you.

after he has made you come for the third time, you watch him sit up on his knees to reach into his shorts and pull his dick out, his darkened tip slick with precum. his long hair falls into his face as he glances downward, using the hand he’d been fingering you with to lube himself up with your cum.

“come here,” you tell him, your voice coming out sharper than you intended; but he doesn’t care, because he follows your request without a word and presses himself into your side. the couch is just big enough to accommodate both of you in this position, but it’s still a tight fit, and your bodies are once again tangled together.

“let me touch you,” you say, your palm pressed to his stomach, feeling the firmness of the muscle.

he raises his eyebrows, like you didn’t even need to ask. “of course.”

“no, i mean…” he realizes what you actually mean as you brush his hand away from his shaft and wrap your fingers around it instead.

“should i teach you how?” jungkook brings his hand to overlap yours, though his breath becomes a bit strained when you slide your hand to the base of his cock and back to the tip again, the pads of your fingers rubbing over the sensitive head. seeing your fingers around him turns him on more than he thought it could, and it’s just a simple fucking handjob.

you roll your eyes. “stroking a dickshouldn’t be that hard.”

“everyone likes it differently, though. fast, slow, soft, or rough…just the tip, or the whole shaft.” you can’t deny that—or the way you find yourself throbbing at his words, his voice husky from the pleasure. which is why you let jungkook close his hand more fully around yours and guide your movements.

it’s captivating to observe his reactions from your hand on his skin—the heavy breaths he lets out and the soft moans and even softer whimpers that come in between the exhales. whenever you squeeze his shaft more firmly or rub your thumb against his leaking tip, you find yourself grinning at the rise and fall of his chest and the tongue that darts out of his mouth to lick at his lips. but mostly, your eyes are drawn back to the sight of your hand working him over, his thighs and stomach tensing sporadically.

eventually, you both look away from your joined hands and at each other’s faces. your eyes dart to his lips and back to his gaze again, and you shift your face forward to signal your desire for a kiss. he meets you there by pressing his lips to yours, and it isn’t hard for him to get lost in the meeting of your mouths and the heat from your palm on his shaft.

your free hand returns to his soft hair to tug on it as your tongues slide against each other. he grunts at the burn of his roots being pulled but doesn’t stop you; on the contrary, his body responds favorably as more precum swells from his tip and his nipples poke against the material of his shirt.

“do you like that, jungkook?” you mumble against his mouth.

“you know i do.” at some point, his hand falls away and he lets you stroke him on your own.

jungkook gives a shuddering moan into your mouth when he climaxes minutes later, thick streams of his cum shooting onto his shirt and dripping down your hand. he tries to keep quiet and doesn’t entirely succeed, but it doesn’t much matter.

you squeeze the few remaining drops of cum from his cockhead, trying to make sure you don’t grip hard enough to actually hurt him. you pull your sticky hand away from jungkook when you think he’s finally emptied, but he grabs your wrist and you look at him questioningly. you watch with shocked eyes as jungkook brings your hand up and takes your messy fingers into his mouth, sucking his cum from them. you know instinctively it isn’t the first time he’s done this—not with the look of pure satisfaction on his features as he licks his own seed off your fingers.

his enthusiastic pleasure is part of the reason why you accept when jungkook gives you a crushing kiss, passing his cum from his tongue to yours. you don’t know what you expected it to taste like, but it isn’t gross like you’ve heard others complain about when sharing their sex tales; despite being salty, the overall taste is neutral. still, it takes some getting used to.

when you pull away from each other, noses brushing and lips wet from each other’s spit, you look into his dark brown eyes and get the sudden desire to say something that’s been buried in the back of your mind for days now.

“why did you come straight to me that night?” you whisper. “like you already knew who you were there for.”

jungkook stares back, his lips curving up slightly. “i just wanted to. or i wanted you, more specifically.”

“that’s not an answer.”

“well, it’s my answer.”

“was i another one to knock off your list?”

“you think i have a list?”

“i’m not stupid. it’s not unusual for guys to have a list. plus, plenty of rumors go around.”

jungkook taps his fingers underneath your chin and kisses you on the lips again, though it is brief. “stop believing everything you hear.”

you clearly won’t be getting a straight answer from him tonight. with the moment broken, you sigh and begin pulling your bottoms back on. “…whatever you say, dude.” once you’re dressed, you climb over his body to get off the couch. you poke him in the chest as your eyes roam over him in his disheveled state, his shorts pulled down and his cum staining his black shirt. “might wanna clean yourself up, huh? i’m going to sleep. and, yeah…thanks for the distraction.”

--

TUESDAY, NOV 7

with the weather being as cold as it is and heading toward winter in another month or so, lorelai is surprised by how quickly the bodies began to smell.

she doesn’t know much of anything about bodily decomposition—because, to her parents’ disappointment, she wasn’t about to be a biology major and have to be around cadavers in a dissection lab—but if this were a movie or something, she would’ve thought it would take longer than just one day. the smell started to hit her the saturday after the party.

but ultimately, this isn’t a movie, and the fact that she’s trapped in a decrepit house in some remote part of town is her present reality.

she doesn’t remember anything about how she got to this house; she thinks she must have been concussed before she was brought here. her head has been hurting badly for days, and not even the simple relief of a painkiller is available.

what she does know is that she’s being kept in a dirty living room on an equally dirty mattress, her hands and legs tied by rope and zip-ties. if there were any miniscule chance of her escaping, it would be impossible to go anywhere considering both her ankles are broken, only adding to the amount of physical pain she’s been in for days.

the living room is mostly empty except for the bodies of some other students from the party, which have been scattered around the room. lorelai tries not to look at them—especially not at the ones she knows—but it’s difficult. they become even more terrifying to her when night falls, turning into dark, rotting shadows in the corners of the room. there has been nothing but the company of these corpses for days, and a couple of visits from the killer.

he's never once taken off his wolf mask or his gloves, and every other part of his body stays covered in all black. she doesn’t have the first idea of what he looks like underneath it all. he has spoken to her a few times, but the voice isn’t one she recognizes. his words when she first awoke inside this house still knock around in her mind, filling her with dread.

he’d crouched in front of her, watching her move around on the mattress and try to orient herself. he had the casual air of someone observing a flipped-up bug struggle on the sidewalk before crushing it underfoot. “you aren’t y/n, but you’ll do for now. we’ll have some real fun later on. you’ll help me give her a good scare.”

“how the fuck do you know y/n?” lorelai had struggled against her restraints, but this only made her newly broken ankles hurt worse. tears began to fall from her eyes from the pain and fear.

the killer had said nothing to that—only tilted his head curiously and stared at her, which was unnerving even if she couldn’t see his eyes.

“you have no fucking reason to go after her, she’s not even a virgin anymore you dumb fuck—” with those words, the killer had backhanded her, sending her already injured head into a fresh wave of agony.

“things would’ve been different if not for that fucking party. you students think you’re so fucking clever, yeah? and look how you paid for it.” it was impossible to see any facial expression, but his body language spoke of anger. “no matter, though. virgin or not, i’ll see this through to the end.”

now it’s yet another morning, and he has returned. he has a lot of debris in his hands—stuff like sticks and dry moss and foliage. he’s also carrying a small bag, the contents of it a mystery. everything he does causes alarm for lorelai, but now confusion joins in.

“ready to have some fun?” he asks. with duct tape over her mouth, she can’t answer back. she watches as he arranges the debris on the ground in front of her, her anxiety mounting as he takes a lighter out of his pocket and sets fire to the foliage.

leaning forward, he rips part of the duct tape away from her mouth with his gloved hand, causing her face to sting. “got anything to say?”

“wh-what the fuck are you doing?”

“i’m gonna stoke a nice fire here…get this knife hot enough to hurt.” he brings out his knife then, and lorelai shrinks away from the blade as he drags the flat of it across her throat—but there’s nowhere else to go, as she’s sitting up against the wall. “then i’ll just cut this pretty little body up a bit. the finishing touch…i think i’ll slice your throat open. how does that sound?” he takes the knife away from her neck to hold the blade over the flames.

lorelai’s breath hitches, and her stomach begins to physically hurt from the outpouring of anxiety flowing through her. she starts to sob, trying to speak through the tears and snot and drool. the only question she can muster up is, “wh-why?”

“this is for y/n—remember? i hope that concussion hasn’t fucked with your memory.” the killer watches the reflection of the flames on the blade as it grows hotter. “and…i’m doing someone a favor.” he doesn’t wait for her to speak again before putting the duct tape back in place over her mouth, leaving her to cry to herself and face her rising distress as he heats the knife until it’s burning hot. internally, she wishes there was any way in the world to get out of this situation.

it isn’t much longer before he’s finished. lorelai screams as he approaches her with the knife, and then at the feeling of the red-hot blade scorching her skin, though the sounds are stifled by the duct tape.

“now, be still while i fix you up.”

--

WEDNESDAY, NOV 8

you go outside that afternoon to check the mail and have an excuse to get out of the house; it doesn’t matter if it’s only for a few moments. you’re not used to staying cooped up in one place for so long with absolutely nothing to do, and you feel like you’re not too far off from going mad with cabin fever. it hasn’t even been a week since everything happened.

you open the mailbox, and there are the usual bills along with something strange: a blank envelope with no return address. even your sister’s address isn’t written on it. flipping it over, you see that the envelope was never sealed. someone must’ve just come up and put it inside the mailbox. but who the hell would do that, and for what reason? whenever any of your neighbors have something to give you or your sister, they come straight up to the house to do it.

inside the envelope is a set of polaroids. their content makes you drop the rest of the mail. your legs grow weak, and you end up sitting down hard on the end of the driveway, some of the polaroids slipping from your hands. the pictures show the bodies of some of the students from your university, their corpses posed in odd positions and some bare of clothing—all dead.

you struggle to breathe as you frantically flip through the rest of the pictures. in the center of all the group photos is lorelai, her neck torn open and her wrists and ankles tied. she’s still dressed the way she was the night of the party, though her dress is stained with dark brown blood. there are open cuts all over her bare skin, their appearance rough-looking and uneven as if they’ve been cauterized.

there are several group polaroids, several of lorelai alone, and several angles of the outside of a house, which must be the same one the bodies are being kept in. one photo of lorelai slips out of your shaking hands, and you see there’s barely legible handwriting on the back of it, which reads, “this is just the teaser, y/n.”

you scream and don’t stop screaming until jungkook comes running out of the house holding the baseball bat, as if the killer might’ve gotten bold enough to attack in daylight. a couple of your neighbors peek out of their houses and make their way over with concern on their faces once they see you sitting on the ground, your exclamations ringing through the street.

there’s a disarrayed group of people around you grabbing at your shoulders and asking what’s wrong, what happened, and then gasps and exclamations of shock when they see the polaroids. you feel yourself being pulled to your feet and then lifted up—maybe it’s jungkook, because it smells like him—but you’re too disoriented to make proper sense of anything right now. you can only think of how much time has been wasted, and how little time lorelai actually had left.

--

SUNDAY, NOV 12

in the main lobby of the funeral home, you sit in a chair next to camille, staring into empty space while the other girl tries to cry as quietly as she can. she cries as if she’s ashamed of it, and you wish you could comfort her, but you don’t know what to say or do. for the past few days, you’ve mostly just felt numb.

you’re waiting for veronica to come back out so you can leave, as she’d stayed behind after the service to talk to lorelai’s family for a little longer.

lorelai’s family had opted to have her cremated after seeing the state of her body. a lot of other families did the same after the events of cherry bomb, not even wanting to entertain the idea of a closed-casket funeral. you can understand their feelings about it if you push through the haze in your mind to consider it for long enough. though the morticians have done the best they can over the past week, sometimes knowing that your loved one has multiple stab wounds and eviscerated organs beneath all the makeup and fancy clothing is too much to handle.

when veronica finally comes out, the three of you walk outside to join the rest of the people who’ve started getting in their cars. some still linger in small huddles, shaking their heads and wiping their faces.

jungkook, who’d driven you and veronica to the memorial, waits outside for you all, leaning on the side of the building. you both thought it was probably better for him not to attend the service considering lorelai was never fond of him and he didn’t know her that well.

“is it finished?” he asks.

“it is.” veronica sighs. “god, funerals are so damn…bleak.”

you notice a man waving at your group from the other side of the parking lot and realize it’s camille’s dad. her posture straightens when she catches sight of him, and she hurriedly tries to wipe the rest of her tears before shoving her tissue into her pocket. “i-i think my dad is waiting for me. i…i’ll see you guys later, alright?”

“okay, camille.” the strange absence of emotion that you’ve been trapped in for the past few days suddenly cracks open when you notice camille’s anxious demeanor as she speed-walks away from the rest of you. intense sorrow overtakes you; you don’t want her to leave, but she has to go.

you are crying before you fully understand what’s happening. veronica puts her arms around you and squeezes you against the side of her body. jungkook reaches a thumb up to wipe away your tears, though you don’t let him get very far before turning your head away and into veronica’s shoulder.

“y/n…”

“how am i supposed to go on?” you exclaim, catching the attention of a few people nearby. “the police said maybe she’s just staying with friends. and now look. plus, the killer knows where me and my sister live now…maybe he always knew.”

“we don’t even have a clue who the killer is…” jungkook mumbles. “there’s no one you know of who might have a grudge against you?”

“no, jungkook. the police already gave me all that questioning. and it doesn’t help me feel any better to think maybe all these deaths are somehow my fault.” you scoff.

“y/n, nothing’s your fault because some freak decided to go around killing people; that was his decision.” jungkook argues.

you nod slightly to his words but say nothing else, not wanting to go further into that topic. you don’t know if you can believe him about that.

the parking lot is emptying out now, so you try to pull yourself together so the three of you can leave. “well…you don’t need to keep staying with us if you don’t want to. we have those assigned bodyguards now, so…” you glance in the direction of one other car sitting beside jungkook’s—inside it are two men the police force appointed after the polaroids of the bodies were planted in your sister’s mailbox.

jungkook looks at you as if he’s trying to gauge your expression; he himself looks surprised, though he attempts to play it off. veronica glances between you both, recognizing the awkward shift in the air.

“you don’t want me there anymore? i mean it is your house—” he glances at veronica “—so that’s fine with me if—"

“what? i didn’t say i don’t want you there, neither did veronica, it’s just if you don’t want to be there—"

“i never said i didn’t want to be there, though?”

you both become quiet, jungkook looking at you and you returning his gaze for a few seconds before looking off to the side. veronica is still standing between you both like she’d rather be anywhere else on earth.

“i just figured that maybe…” why are you being so concerned about me? isn’t this the part where we go our separate ways? is what you really want to ask. you have seen and learned enough from your friends’ and even your acquaintances’ experiences to realize that any other one night stand would not have cared so much. that’s how these things go, right? but he isn’t really a one night stand anymore, either.

you don’t even know if you’re considered friends with benefits, but what would that change? you’d still seen others tossed aside without much thought by their FWBs while in times of need. considering his history, you don’t understand why jungkook isn’t following the same template now, and you don’t think you should ask why for fear of breaking the illusion.

fed up with your own confusion, you decide now isn’t the time to lament on your lack of knowledge about these things. “nevermind. that’s fine. so you’ll stay?”

the corner of his mouth lifts in a brief smile. “i’ll stay as long as you won’t try to kick me out.”

you aren’t in the mood to attempt to smile back, but he seems to understand that. “right, well...good.”

“…now that you two have figured that shit out, can we leave?”

--

FRIDAY, NOV 17

jungkook thought that getting outside a bit more would help you feel better and prevent you from developing a complete fear of leaving the house, which is why you’re sitting in this claustrophobic little diner now with him, yoongi, and camille—and of course, your ever-present bodyguards in the booth behind you all. but this outing isn’t doing anything to mitigate your fears.

nearly 10 minutes in, you have to ask jungkook to switch seats with you so you’re not on the outside of the booth, as you’re afraid that it’s too easy-access if anyone—say, the killer, though you’ve been trying not to think so obsessively about him—were to come in and start stabbing you to death right where you sit. being on the inside calms you for a little while until you become anxious about the window beside you; what if he has a gun again and simply shoots through the glass? all he’d have to do is stand on the sidewalk and aim, his werewolf mask laughing at you with its eternally frozen growling expression, and your brains would be all over the table just like that frat guy’s.

your meal sits half-eaten as you get increasingly lost in your anxieties. the others are talking about something, but you can’t hear what. it’s like some of your senses have shut down or begun working incorrectly. the strawberry sauce in camille’s sundae looks too much like blood and even smells like it from the occasional whiffs you get, and you find yourself staring at the sundae dish and wanting to throw it across the restaurant.

jungkook’s hand touches you on the back, and the tension in your body increases. he feels it and draws away, though he keeps trying to meet your eyes. “are you okay?” he whispers.

“why ask that? she obviously isn’t,” yoongi says, like he’s annoyed with the obviousness of jungkook’s question.

“hyung, i’m just trying to help.”

“it was your great idea to come out here when she didn’t want to, though.”

“y/n—” camille starts.

“can’t you throw that out? it smells like blood.” your mouth feels useless and hard to maneuver, but you manage to say those words.

“what?”

“the…that. that thing.” everyone looks at camille’s melting sundae. yoongi raises his eyebrows.

“blood?”

“do you mean it—looks like blood?” jungkook suggests.

you raise your voice in irritation, not understanding how everyone else is unable to perceive the same scent that you do. “no, i-it does, but it smells like blood too! just get rid of it!”

one of the waitresses comes over to the table. “is everything okay over here?”

“um, we’re fine! i’m finished with this though.” camille hurriedly hands the sundae off to her, trying to keep the situation calm.

“oh, well—the rest of you too? that’ll be it, then?” she gathers everyone’s plates and leaves with a smile that attempts to be cordial but is still colored with unease.

her departure leaves a stiff silence in which you all spare glances at each other but try to avoid directly meeting eyes. camille is the first to break it.

“i’ll ask my dad if i can stay over with you,” she suggests. she suddenly sounds much more tired. jungkook’s eyebrows furrow slightly at her words; yoongi silently glances at the younger man. “just, you know…maybe the extra company would help? he’s been treating me like a kid again, but we should be safe with the bodyguards there, so…”

“you don’t have to do that,” you say, though you’re too exhausted to truly argue.

“you’re in shambles, y/n. and it’s not just for your benefit. i’m feeling pretty fucking alone right now, and it’s hard for my dad to understand the emotional side of it, so…” camille plays with her fingers and doesn’t look at anyone as she speaks; you know talking about her father can be a sore spot for her sometimes. “uh, anyway. not to trauma-dump or anything. just let me do this.”

you sigh. “fine…okay. do whatever you have to. can we just leave?”

as you’re all walking outside, jungkook pulls you aside.

“i still worry about you after that incident at the store, you know?” he admits.

you shrug his hand off your arm and glare at him. “you think i’m crazy.”

“i don’t. i just want you to be able to relax and not feel like you’re being hunted 24/7. i don’t think the killer is constantly waiting around the nearest corner for you, y/n.”

“you don’t know how close the killer could be. he knows where i go to sleep at night. so stop the bullshit, jungkook.”

“you’ll be okay. you have me, remember? i protected you that night…i can do it again.”

you examine his face for a long moment and find that you are too overwhelmed with stress and fear to be moved by his words. “i’d like to trust you…but the killer might just murder you too. then who’ll save me?” you don’t wait for his response before walking away to catch up with the other two.

--

LYING IN WAIT...

it’s strange to see the police bodyguards in veronica’s driveway and backyard everyday. it’s not the same two all day—they switch off so that there are two doing a day shift and two doing a night shift.

the security team at the hospital where your sister works is aware of the situation, so you try not to get too worried about her safety when she’s away from the house—but it’s difficult.

there have been no more kills connected to your university since lorelai. it seems like half the town has forgotten their fears and tried to go back to some sense of normalcy while the other half still hides away and lives in perpetual panic, including you. the former group of people has started muddying the waters for the police, with some teenagers getting brave enough to sneak around in wolf masks and vandalize buildings with red-lettered virgin graffiti just to fuck with the cops. there have even been a few people who turned themselves in claiming to be the killer—only their supposed confessions never matched the details of the case.

reporters have tried to hound lorelai’s family and your family several times for any speculations or answers on the killer’s identity, but none of you are willing to spread misinformation just to give them something to write about. however, that hasn’t stopped other residents of your town from sharing their speculations and even implicating their own relatives or neighbors—whether as a fucked-up joke or as genuine revenge just depends on whoever’s speaking. with all of these false leads, the police are still no closer to finding the killer than they’d initially been.

everyday feels like you’re waiting for the other shoe to drop, though the chances of any more kills are starting to seem improbable; the university is practically empty. but it doesn’t matter to you if the school is nearly deserted, because the killer has his aims set on you now, and you only wish you knew why.

up in your room, you and camille sit on your bed gazing out the window—the window that must always remain locked now, for fear of unwanted ingress. you’ve never been uncomfortable in your sister’s house, but lately you’ve been feeling like you’re boxed in with every wall pressing towards you.

sitting up from your lying-down position, you have to find the appropriate words for a moment before speaking. “camille—i can’t stop feeling like maybe we aren’t entirely safe,” you murmur.

camille raises her eyebrows. “why not? those guys stay outside all day, and we keep everything locked up day and night. literally, the only time the front door opens is for veronica to leave and come back from work everyday.”

“i don’t know. there’s no particular reason for it…it just seems like we’re waiting for something.”

“…yeah? for the killer to be caught.”

“but he’s made no moves recently. you remember the policeman’s daughter, right? i even texted her and she hasn’t heard anything new that we don’t already know. seems like things have slowed down at the police station. it’s not like that abandoned house was in the killer’s name or anything, so what leads would they have?”

camille frowns and rubs her eyes like something’s in them, but when she looks at you directly, you see her eyes are red from unshed tears. “…i want things to be okay, though. i’m tired of living like this. you know how i had to beg just to get my dad to let me leave the house. he’s constantly on edge.” you feel even more unsettled to see camille so distressed lately, as she’s always been the only one able to pull something funny out of a terrible situation—something enough to distract you from the horrors. “all i know is they’ll have to dig his ass out of some hole in the ground at some point. he can’t hide in this town forever.”

“yeah…i guess you’re right.” you still don’t feel reassured, but you don’t voice your doubts.

--

WEDNESDAY, NOV 22

“i think i might go mad,” camille says from her position on the armchair, her limbs splayed haphazardly across it and one hand stuck in a bag of chips.

you sigh. “you’re the one who wanted to watch this thanksgiving movie marathon.”

“the most mid holiday of the season,” jungkook adds.

“no one cares what either of you think, thanks.” it isn’t long before the program is over and the ending credits are rolling. with an exaggerated exhale, camille gets up from the chair and crunches the bag of chips in her hand. “i’m going to your room, y/n. you two just do whatever it is you do down here, since you hate my movie choices so much!”

“means we can finally turn the channel.” jungkook snatches the remote off the coffee table and does just that.

camille goes into the kitchen to throw out the chip bag and wash her hands. your focus returns to the TV. a few seconds later, you hear the upstairs flooring creak above the noise of the water pouring from the tap.

“what’s up, sis? i thought you were sleeping.” veronica is known to be a deep sleeper, so it’s not common for her to be getting up in the middle of the night. there’s no answer to your question. you glance upstairs, but your sister isn’t standing there; she isn’t standing at all, instead being carried by someone wearing an all-too familiar mask.

you scream as the killer tosses your sister over the stair railing. her torso has been sliced open from collarbone to navel, her body leaving a large splatter of blood on the floor where she lands. jungkook jumps to his feet but is momentarily immobilized as he gazes at your sister’s body crumpled on the floor. you slide off the couch and crawl over to her, still crying out, but there’s no life left to try and salvage.

the screaming brings camille rushing to the kitchen doorway. she can barely vocalize what’s wrong? before spotting veronica’s body and stopping in her tracks. in a moment that feels like it takes forever to pass, the killer pulls a gun from his waistband—you recognize it as one of the guns the policemen carry and realize he must’ve killed the bodyguard posted in the backyard—and shoots her in the chest twice.

“camille!” when you go over to where she’s lying on the ground, she is still alive but bleeding intensely and struggling to breathe. your knees slip in the blood that begins pooling around her. “shit, camille…p-please don’t die…” you press your hand against the wounds, but they’re bleeding so much that your efforts don’t help, and the pressure of your hand causes her more pain.

there’s the sound of a gunshot at the front door as the lock is blown off, and the door is banged open a few seconds later by the remaining bodyguard. he has virtually no time to fire off another shot before the killer is shooting him in the head first.

the killer throws the gun aside, taking his knife in his other hand and making his way down the stairs. “your sister left her window cracked open. i waited for days for a slip-up like that. see how much harm can come from a simple mistake? well, she was collateral damage anyway.”

even in your panic, it’s as if all your bodily functions freeze when you recognize the familiarity of the killer’s voice. camille reacts with a rattling gasp, but her body is becoming too weak for her to utter anything; all she can do is watch as the man stops at the bottom of the stairs and pulls his mask off.

“yoongi…” your voice breaks as you try to speak again, but nothing coherent comes out.

he drops the mask on the floor and brushes a hand through his hair. “i guess you weren’t expecting that. good. we kept it up ‘til the end.”

your lips form around the word we, but your vocal cords won’t cooperate. you twist around to look at jungkook, who is still standing by the couch.

the man who you’d gotten too close to for your own good and done so many firsts with, who’d promised you that he’d protect you and was even there for you on the day of lorelai’s memorial, looks at you now with eyes glowing from the thrill as his mouth twitches into a smile—small at first but growing into a full grin. “i almost can’t believe we staged all that shit and it actually worked. you really believed it all, y/n.

not all of those kills were hyung’s, of course...there’s no way i’d miss out on the best parts. you don’t know what it’s like until you kill a person for the first time. crashing cherry bomb was his idea, though. and lorelai was mine. that bitch would’ve kept you away from me, and i needed her gone for this kill to work.”

through tears, you finally muster up the strength to ask, “wh-why have you done this? that night…y-you mean to tell me none of that was real? being shot at—why would you—” your voice rises until you’re shouting. “you-you’ve killed so many people. what was the purpose?!”

jungkook’s smile fades somewhat as he pretends to think about it, acting like he’s reminiscing on wistful memories. “i realized that killing and fucking aren’t that different, y/n. the real ecstasy of it is in taking someone pure…and doing something to them that has never been done before, and can never be done again. there’s a certain eroticism in killing someone, stabbing them, entering them…it’s like sex in the most profane sense.”

“you’re disgusting,” you mutter, glaring at him through your tears. you can’t help but feel shame to think of the times you’d had sex with him. had he simply been imagining murdering you during those moments? it makes you want to throw up.

yoongi steps closer until he’s right in front of you and camille. “and as for me…i just enjoy it. practice really does make perfect. you wouldn’t believe how entertaining it can be to see someone beg for their life.” his lips turn upwards in a dark smile resembling jungkook’s. “but instead of raging at us, i think you have bigger matters to be concerned with.” yoongi gestures his knife hand to camille, and when you look down at her body, you realize she’s no longer moving.

you lift camille’s head up with your hands as if that could make her return your gaze, though you can find no sign of breathing or pulse. “god, no…” you scream in frustration, your hands slipping in her blood. you check once more and again for any signs of life, because there is just no possible way this could’ve happened, but there are none present. “please—i’m sorry…”

“time’s up.” yoongi grabs your arm and yanks you away from camille, jostling you to try to get you on your feet. you flail around in his grip, fruitlessly scratching at his arms that are covered by his thick jacket, before managing to elbow him in the groin with your frantic movements. “shit!” this causes him to loosen his grip, which is enough for you to scramble away from him, slipping in the blood as you go.

you make it to the other side of the room where the officer lies facedown—though there isn’t much left of his face from yoongi’s shot. you snatch the gun from the dead officer’s hand and point it in the direction of both men. the safety is already off; all you’d have to do is pull the trigger and kill either one of them right now. before you can act, yoongi uses his free hand to pull another gun from his waistband—his own.

“as i said before, i know how to take care of myself,” he says, flicking the safety off and aiming for you, though his stance shows he’s still in pain. “please don’t assume it’ll be that easy. do you even know how to shoot a gun?”

you and yoongi are at an impasse as you both point your guns at each other, jungkook looking on with casual amusement coloring his face. “fuck you,” you spit out. you remain hesitant to fire on him, knowing that even if you succeed, he could fatally shoot you at the same time.

“let’s not do it this way,” yoongi says, his voice low and soft in an attempt to be persuasive, though you just find it disturbing. “you were supposed to be a clean kill. a few stabs and it’d all be over. i’ll even let jungkook do it, since you seem to like each other so much. do you really want to be shot down like a dog like camille over there?”

“you and him can both fry in hell!” you shout.

yoongi glances over at jungkook. they both nod before yoongi hands the knife to him, and the younger man takes a few steps in your direction. you don’t know whether to point the gun at him or keep it trained on yoongi; your head is pounding with a headache that you’ve only just realized you have. “don’t come over here. stay away from me!”

you press your back to the wall as jungkook comes closer, inching towards your right side with his knife at the ready. you slide away from him as you keep your back against the wall. “hand it over, y/n. it doesn’t have to be like this.”

“hand it over and let you kill me? are you insane? you lied to me this whole time, you fucking piece of shit.”

jungkook scoffs and looks at yoongi as if to say can you believe this? “why wouldn’t i lie to you? you were always meant to die.”

he won’t stop coming towards you, and you’re running out of room to slide away from him. you grasp for anything to try to reason with him, though you know it’s futile. “you realize that if you kill me now and you conveniently survive, everyone will know it’s you? you’ve been living here for weeks, you jackass!”

“hyung and i have that covered. it’s not for you to worry about, considering you won’t be worrying about anything soon.”

jungkook lunges for you with the knife, thinking he can catch you off guard and overpower you. you scream and pull the trigger in your frenzied state of mind, shooting yoongi. the next few things seem to happen almost simultaneously:

you hear the crash of yoongi’s body hitting the TV stand and the TV falling to the floor.

you feel jungkook’s knife piercing your shoulder, causing you to fire a stray round into the wall from the unexpected burst of pain.

you hear another gunshot that’s not from you; you see and feel jungkook stumble into you, the knife sliding from his fingers and to the floor.

you realize that he’s been shot when his hand flies to the bullet wound on his lower back; he’d been standing in front of you, and yoongi meant to hit you, not him.

“jungkook!” yoongi’s shout is furious and regretful as he steadies himself on the TV stand.

trying to push the pain into the back of your mind, you clumsily grasp jungkook’s fallen knife and run for the stairs. more shots follow you and most of them miss but one, which strikes you in the thigh.  while you cling to the stair railing and try to regain your footing, you are suddenly staring mortality in the face and understanding with a freezing-cold clarity that you will die right now if you don’t do something.

your nervous system vibrates with fear and adrenaline as you tighten your grip on the police officer’s gun and shoot yoongi with it twice—in the same area he’d shot camille.

these last two bullets finish him off immediately. you don’t think it’s fair, with how camille suffered and bled and died in your arms. for a moment, you’re so outraged that you wish he’d come back to life so that you could kill him again. you’re torn from these thoughts by jungkook.

“you bitch…he was my only family after everyone else threw me away. do you understand? i’ll fucking kill you!” jungkook is nearly writhing in the ground from his upset and from the hurt of his injury; it frightens you that this same man is someone you once thought you could grow fond of.

you aim the gun for jungkook next, but the chamber is empty. either way, he currently has no weapon, which leaves you with a small chance to get away before he re-arms himself. throwing the gun away, you stagger up the rest of the steps while his screams continue echoing up to you.

you give no thought to the blood trail you’re leaving behind as you rush to veronica’s room and to the window yoongi had entered through. you begin squeezing yourself through, keeping your grip on your knife all the while, but your injuries make it difficult to move. a few more tears slip out as you try to balance your injured leg on the tree branch beneath the window, and the desperation of wanting to give up clings to you.

you hear jungkook’s heavy and limping footsteps coming up the stairs, and you attempt to hurry, but you’re only halfway out of the window. when he crashes into the room, it’s unnervingly easy for him to grab your arm and yank your body back through the window, uncaring of how you get scraped up in the process.

he jams you up against the nightstand with one of the kitchen knives to your neck to stop your movements; his harsh maneuver causes the objects on the nightstand to rattle. the nightstand’s edge digs into the backs of your thighs, the pressure causing your wounded thigh to hurt more.

“you want to know why i picked you?” jungkook hisses, the knife’s blade stinging your throat as it begins to break skin. “you were just another choice out of many, but i decided you’d be the first one that i’d fuck and kill.”

it’s painful to hear, but it angers you at the same time. “fuck you!” in your rage, you spit in his eyes. jungkook jerks back and the knife shifts from its previous position at your neck; you take those few seconds to grasp the alarm clock off the nightstand and crash it against his head.

“shit—!” he cries out, stumbling and grasping the side of his head. he tries to grab for you again, but you jump onto the bed and crawl away from him, your stomach lurching at all of veronica’s blood soaked into the sheets. you spot a small decorative glass bowl on the dresser—the one filled with little candies that you’d always teased veronica for, saying she was so much like a grandma handing out treats to her grandchildren. when your feet touch the ground again, you clasp your hand around it like it’s a lifeline and fling it at jungkook’s head as hard as you can, just as he makes it around the bed to your side. the shards cut his face when it breaks, slowing him down further as he grabs his slashed and bleeding face. one of his eyes is blinded from the blood and glass.

this will probably be your only chance while he’s struggling to gather himself. you rush towards him with the knife handle tight in both of your hands and drive the blade into the middle of his chest, putting all your strength into that movement—just as his own knife impales your abdomen.

you are both simultaneously struck from the shock of being stabbed, and it takes you a few long moments to piece your mind back together as the pain radiates throughout your body. jungkook groans when you shift the knife around in his wound as you pull it out, letting his blood flow out freely. his breaths become wet and rattling as he chokes on his own blood, the red fluid staining his mouth and dripping down to his neck. he jams his knife further into your wound in retaliation so that the handle is flush against your body, causing your head to spin.

“i-if i die, i’m taking you w-with me.” jungkook gasps with his remaining effort. his body starts to sag from its standing position as he weakens, his hand slipping from the knife handle. he loosely grasps the comforter with one hand as he collapses to his knees, his torso becoming soaked with blood and his head bleeding from your earlier hits.

you drop your knife and lean against the bed too, shifting your body to find a position that could lessen the pain, but it’s impossible with a knife lodged in your abdomen. you know enough to understand that you’ll bleed out faster if you remove it, though, so you resist the urge. “you can rot in hell alone, jungkook.” you watch him struggle for what feels like minutes before his breaths stop altogether and his body slumps to the floor. he is just a blur of clothes and blood through your tears. you’ve never felt so lonely in your life.

you have a thought to call 911, but you’re becoming more and more lightheaded from the blood loss, and you can already hear sirens approaching on your street. you figure one of your neighbors must’ve called after hearing the gunshots; perhaps the bodyguard sent for backup before he was shot. your rescue has come much later than you would’ve preferred—or maybe everything just happened much faster than it seemed. you can’t tell anymore.

you can’t tell anymore, and you no longer want to look at the carnage around you, and nothing makes any sense. so, you close your eyes to it all; and when you feel someone lifting you in their arms—this sensation is so familiar—and maneuvering you onto a stretcher, you allow yourself to relent to it and empty your mind of everything.

@ihatemen55 @cottoncandyclouds-stuff @yunhofingers @heybabesposts @twilight-loveer @whipwhoops @mrsminho @junecat18 @hoshi-is-ult-bbg @okayiamkassandra @witchbitxhxx @hopefulrascalstatesmantoad @thaiika @goldentea10 @iloverubberduckiez-blog @katie-tibo @ohsweetmimosa @dream-cvtcher @hoseokteardrop @lpgirl2324 @vanillacupcakefrosting @gukiemochi @jkslaugh97 @ahgasegotarmy116 @jeonjklibs @bangtans-momma @screamertannie @kenzietaetae @han-nah-banana @00frenchfries00 @taiwan0618 @laurynne5 @monvante @ynisthatyou @thiccthighs19 @jeonwiixard

[gallavichthings]

It's time!

How would you all like 21 22 fics on the 21st 22nd of December?

The Gallavich Masquerade Ball 2023 is now open! Grab a glass of champagne or anything else you'd prefer, some hors d'oeuvres, and choose your (first) dance partner for the night!

You can check all the fics in our AO3 collection or on this post, after the cut. A list of all authors with links to their profiles is also included. This post is pinned so you can check it whenever you want.

And here's the link for the form where you can put your guesses. It's only one form for all the fics, so please wait to submit your guesses only after you've read them all.

Here's the updated point system:

Points for readers: Correct guess on first choice: 5 points. Correct guess on second choice: 2 points. Incorrect guess: lose 1 point. (Please note that you only lose 1 point per story, even if you guess incorrectly on both choices.)

Points for writers: If someone correctly guesses your fic (regardless of in the first or second choice): 1 point. If someone wrongfully guesses your fic: 3 points.

Leaving kudos and comments is allowed and appreciated! Writers are also allowed to answer, but it's up to them whether to already do it or wait until everyone's identity is revealed so as not to give anything away accidentally. Oh, and if you want to post something about the fics here on Tumblr but can't tag them, I can serve as buffer for now lol.

Oh, and the surprise? The winners will get some great fanart, courtesy of the talented @doshiart! Isn't that awesome?! 🥂

Cheers!

Keep reading to get a list of all the fics with their summaries and word count, as well as a list of all the authors, with links to their AO3 profiles.

FICS:

AITA?  (2,072)

AITA? My new clients (29M and 31M) threatened me and I want to fire them. I know that’s not official therapist speak. TLDR; I want to encourage them to have healthier boundaries and find a new therapist, but until then, what do I do?

Attitude adjustment (4,483)

Post-canon Ian and Mickey figure out some relationship issues. That includes insults, (play-)fighting, more insults, and orgasms. Or: Mickey is having an attitude. Thank god Ian knows exactly what to do.

Black Charcoal meets Fiery Red (1,838)

Ian poses in a life drawing class. A straight forward job, if not for the guy with the blue eyes who can't stop staring at him.

Carnival (3,136)

Ian and Mickey spend the evening at a carnival... "Ian locked the car’s door, and put his arms around Mickey’s shoulders, as they walked towards the carnival. He had brought the leaflet home a few days ago, wiggling the colorful sketch of a carousel and the outdated font under Mickey’s nose with some hopeful glee. Mickey had protested for habit sake, but had caved in pretty easily..."

Five Dates with Brad f*cking Pitt (4,269)

Sometimes things may not be what they seem. Especially when there are assholes around who add fuel to the fire just for the sake of a fucking joke.

Groceries (2,260)

A routine trip to the store turns into a trip down memory lane.

The Guardians (4,879)

3,000 years ago, they had to join forces to defeat an evil sorcerer. Now, the sorcerer was back, and more powerful than ever. Could they defeat him for good?

i'll find a new place to be from (5,947)

They stand in silence for a couple beats, unspoken words lingering above their heads. The cig in his hand has long burned out and Ian resists the temptation to light up another, and another. He feels his mouth open, and close, then open again–but nothing comes out. Time’s up. "See you inside, Red," Mickey finally says before pushing the door open, and Ian remembers how to breathe.

Infused Attraction (3,434)

Mickey has to receive Iron infusions. Ian is a student nurse who is assisting the other nurses with the infusion. Mickey is interested in the redhead. Ian is seemingly interested in him too. Let's see how it goes!

Italy (I Trust And Love You) (3,183)

"Ian closed his eyes and ran a hand through his damp hair. He sighed and straightened his shoulders. Took a deep breath, as if to steal himself for some monumental task, and walked off down the sidewalk. The rain made quick work of drenching him. Ian didn’t seem to notice. In the dirt beneath the tree, drawn in crude blocky letters made with the toe of his boot: I + M." OR A story mostly told through Debbie's eyes during world war two, as she worries for all her brothers, but particularly the one sent home much before the rest.

Jump To Recipe (5,977)

Hiring Mickey Milkovich - Freelance Photographer to shoot the photos for his food blog was the best move Ian’s ever made. Mickey’s a fantastic shot, plus he’s committed to the success of Ian’s blog. (He’s fucking hot, too. But that’s just an added bonus.) And the best thing about him, is that in all the ways he’s professional behind the camera, he’s refreshingly unprofessional to Ian’s face. Which means when he comes around, Ian always knows he’s in for a good laugh, intriguing conversation, and an ego boost - Mickey never shy about how much he loves Ian’s food when they dig in after the shoot. Ian’s made chocolate lava cake today. But when extra time leads to their at-home appointment going way off script - Mickey wanting to update Ian’s headshots, but with a twist - who will the spicier photos leave wanting more, the “housewife army” from his blog’s comment section, or Ian and Mickey?

A Lot (4,245)

What could have happened if Ian had told Mickey that he was worried about going to Mexico with him?

The man in the van (2,141)

“Suppose I should thank you for the compliment then,” Ian teases, smirking a little. The guy snorts. “Don’t mention it, Red. I just call ‘em like I see ‘em.” He proceeds to shamelessly check Ian out again, licking the corner of his mouth as he does. or Ian Gallagher wouldn't mind some excitement in his life. Enter one Mickey Milkovich, ready to oblige.

ole red (5,596)

Mickey is out of prison and walking the straight and narrow with help of his cheering section, P.O. Larry . It’s hard being tough in a pastel polo and dad shorts. Old Army is just a paycheck until he meets the assistant manager, Ian. Finally he figures out Ian was Mandy’s Ian from their teen years. Mickey is attracted to the redhead but is still closeted. Ian responds to Mickey lashing out by revealing he knows Mickey’s secret. Mickey decides to be brave and the reward , huge 😈

The Reason to Exist (4,851)

lieutenantcolonel [18:22]: can you stop stealing my loot lieutenantcolonel [18:22]: this team only needs 1 sharpshooter anyway 😐 mm1234567890 [18:23]: shut up u f** lieutenantcolonel [18:23]: WHAT

Red Hot (4,364)

Ian's workday has been shitty... but his afternoon might just be very different. Thanks to his favorite nephew and a certain mouthy and opinionated stall owner at the winter farmer's market.

A Salute Before We Sink (4,601)

The world will end tomorrow. Ian's only chance at survival is to earn a spot in an underground bunker. One man stands in his way.

Snowballs and Sneaking Out (2,441)

Mickey shows up to the Gallagher House in the middle of the night with a surprise for Ian.

So drunk on you (3,878)

"Then Mickey launches himself into quite a detailed account of the previous evening and there goes Ian’s sanity. He’s learned over the months to hone his selective hearing. That is, he’s not tuning Mickey out completely but he’s trained his brain to gloss over the facts that fall under the TMI category and focus on the highlights. Again, for the sake of his sanity. Because the thing is, he’s so gone on Mickey it’s actually embarrassing. And he’s been gone pretty much from the very beginning." Just another friends-to-lovers story.

Span the Distance, Bridge the Border (4,988)

Ian and Mickey are happy, living on the West Side and adjusting to life as husbands in their new apartment. Things are going well, really well, until one day Mickey’s brothers show up. And God only knows what they could possibly want.

weight of the world (3,360)

Mickey thought he was fucked for life and that he’d never see his mom again. Turns out he was wrong about both of those things.

Wonderful- a Gallavich Christmas Mini-fic (5,030)

In which Mickey learns the reason for the season or How the Mick gained Christmas.

AUTHORS:

Blodeuwedd

Calli_Writes

Captain_Jowl

energie_vie

Gallabitch73

gallawitch

Gembu

GrandSelfMythology

IanGalagher

JuliaKay

lingy910y

MissSnowwhitepink

mmmichyyy

My_Brain_Melted

NotHereNJ

Rayrayor

sam_writes_fics

Suzy_Queue

sweet_perversion

Sweetbee78

whatthebodygraspsnot

whatyouandihave

[fcknstar]

hey! i read ur marcus lopez fic and absolutely loved it ur so talented omg

i’m as wondering if i could request a fic with prompt 12 with marcus lopez x reader?

🫶

and if so could you also add me to your tag list?

,, after dark "

pairings : marcuslopez x gn!reader

summary : sometimes your past do catches up to you.

content warnings : disagreements

** lowercase intended**

if saying that you had your life together was an understatement. you were working for the biggest and most respected mafias in the country. it was normal to see at least one dead body in the alleyway. a lifeless body, dumped as if it had no worth that got pushed away as a broken furniture no one saw worthy to save. 

you were just an assistant who also worked as a hitman, being payed high for even injuring a targeted person. it gave you joy, you wanted to feed on souls that deserved nothing but death to come. you sucked in life of your victims, craving more and more as if it was like food and you were always hungry. 

your boss set you out to raid an abandoned apartment to where homed a filthy rich man who unfortunately died due to a heart attack. he kept many important documents that your boss wanted and tonight, thats where you were headed. 

you were clothed in a black skin-tight long sleeved top and short skirt which allowed you to hide your dagger, with a pistol on your waistline. when the time calls for it, you were going to be the one to kill whoever saw you and got in your way. 

you had not noticed the figure which hid in the shadows watching your every move. as you rummaged through the drawers, you heard something drop. you spun around, gripping onto your gun as you pointed to the person standing in front of you. 

" marcus? " 

" hey, i was just dropping by- "

" you arent supposed to be here, you know. " you advanced towards him, watching him stumble backwards. 

" well, neither should you. why dont you put the gun down, honey? " earning a glare from you, you made a move, linking your leg under his making him fall on his back. 

" oh, i remember this. " as you stood above him, he mumbled.

" ignoring your favorite person i see.. its okay.. i bet the memories follow you around dont they. " you dont hesitate but kick his side making him groan. 

" leave this place, act like we never even crossed paths. " you sigh, walking away from him. 

" dont you miss me? " 

" no i dont. and i will not. "

" but seeing you stalk me says otherwise.. how you constantly follow me wherever i go.. i suppose i am grateful that you are looking out for me. " marcus pouted. 

you could not accept how right he had been. you were so in love with marcus that you knew itd be difficult to start a life without him. but you could. for all these years before meeting him shows how you could live without him. but why cant you do the same knowing what you two have been through. how could you when the only thing that occupied your mind was him. how he often thought of your life first and put his own life on the line to save you. how could you ever want to leave someone like him. it was now your turn to look after him when he did everything to protect you. even if as strangers, you knew that you still wanted to be on his wavelength. 

" look, i know we left on terms we didn't agree on due to our statuses, but you can't blame me to not.. look for you. " it felt like you pulled a nerve when you confessed the last part. 

" but you did. "

" i had to okay! what would you do if you are being given a choice, to get your lover killed.. or have your own blood throw you away like youre some meat, even having them turn their back against you? i knew i was being selfish okay? i.. i just cant imagine having you die.. not when i know i could have done something. or me dying. so im sorry if i was being selfish, it was either you dying, or me. and you know what i would have picked. " you were now going on a tangent, gun placed away in its holder, with you rummaging through the drawers. you grabbed every document you could find. marcus just looked at you. 

" im sorry, okay?  i just wanted you, you to be safe and well. " you could have just chosen to have your family killing you, but in the moment, you just had to. it was either him being dead because you wanted to survive. or him being alive at the cost of your freedom. 

marcus never saw the side of your story, too busy grieving with his own. he watched you walk away as if he werent there. as if, he didnt mean anything to you anymore. but he knew, he knew that you loved him enough to save him without even thinking. 

a.n : m not very proud with this, dont know why. and to the person who requested this, thank you but sorry because i couldn't tag you, its not letting me. and so sorry for the long wait!

[cutestkilla]

An ask game for writers to procrastinate working on your WIP(s)

Thanks for tagging me @theearlgreymage @wellbelesbian @shrekgogurt @orange-peony @bookish-bogwitch @aristocratic-otter @youarenevertooold and @thewholelemon!

1. 🦈Tell us the name of your/ one of your WIP(s):

The only WIP I’m really actively working on right now is Hiding Out in the Open.

2. 🍄Describe your WIP/one of your WIP(s) in the format of “___ + ___ =___”

Psychology Podcast Hidden Brain + AU where Simon and Baz never got together but Simon still lost his magic and got spelled by Smith = Non-linear AWTWB-era Baz negging Simon with podcast links but actually secretly being sweet the whole time until they’re having real conversations and like, excavating some trauma until Simon figures himself out (or does he?) (He does, I’m not a monster.)

(I needed more terms for this equation, a few higher powers maybe.)

3. 🌍What tags or warnings will one of your WIP(s) need if you intend to share it?

Well, so far I’ve warned for anxiety/panic attacks, implied/referenced child abuse, mentions of cannibalism, mentions of eating bugs, AND mentions of animal cruelty. SOUNDS FUN RIGHT?

4. 🧭An alternative title to one of your WIP(s)?

So this fic is titled after a Feist song. The alternate title was a combination of a Ron Sexmith song that Feist did a great cover of and the name of the fictional podcast in my story:

Secret Heart, Invisible Mind

5. ⚠️Which WIP you're most likely to finish or update next?

Oh, it’ll be this one for sure! I have nothing else even approaching any kind of written state.

6. 💾What is your document of your WIP/ a WIP called? (not the stories actual title but what you’ve saved it as)

Well, it’s just titled after the fic. But before I had a title and was just dreaming things up, I had a doc titled “Hidden Brainstorms”. There’s also a doc in the folder for this titled “Enemies Closer” that’s filled with research I did for an episode I have to invent…

7. 🖍Post Any sentence(s) from your WIP.

“You stood him up? What the hell Basil? I cancelled my plans for this.”

8. ♻️A scrapped idea for your current WIP.

Okay so I am an idea hoarder, I rarely fully scrap an idea until I’m done writing a story, I just park them all in a dumping ground at the end of my doc for ongoing review. But one for sure scrapped idea I had for this back in the start was that Shep would co-host a podcast at some point in this story.

9. 🤔What’s a story you’d love to write but haven’t even started yet?

Welllllllll, I may have an entire (shared) Trello board for a fic that @artsyunderstudy and I have been excitedly talking about co-writing. I won't say much but it’s a Canonverse AU, featuring older strangers-to-lovers Snowbaz, and it’s a ghost story. Your basic SPOOKY SEXY SAD CATHARSIS type of deal.

10. 🤡How many WIPS are you actively working on?

Actively? One. Two if you count the Trello board which I periodically add ideas to. Three if you count the Wedding fic draft I have 20K written for and could start writing on again at ANY MOMENT.

11. 🛠Is there a scene or anything in the WIP you are struggling with right now?

Well, I’m about to be struggling with writing the scene where Baz listens to the podcast episode I have to completely invent. I have a full first rough pass at this chapter done, except that part where I just copy pasted a bunch of research notes to come back to…

12. ❤️Not a question, just a second Kudos to send.

🙏YOU get a kudos, and YOU get a kudos, and YOU get a kudos!

Tags in case you wanna: @artsyunderstudy @hushed-chorus @ivelovedhimthroughworse @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @fatalfangirl @facewithoutheart @skeedelvee @emeryhall @mooncello @monbons @angelsfalling16 @larkral @chen-chen-chen-again-chen @run-for-chamo-miles @brilla-brilla-estrellita @best--dress @onepintobean @martsonmars @messofthejess @ileadacharmedlife @urban-sith

[trippygalaxy]

Pairing: Sr!Time x gn!reader (headcanon, romantic) Warnings: Fluff?Time being a grump! I ramble a lot, sorry ._.'

OKAY I KNOW I HAVE REQUESTS I SHOULD BE WORKING ON BUT MY BRAIN IS FALLING IN LOVE AGAIN WITH SACRED REALMS TIME!! The comic is @/zelda-the-sacred-realm (no I will not tag them, they're cool and I would rather die then have them acknowledge me being a simp :3 /hj)

Time

Honestly very surprising that you managed to woo the grump! His salty attitude and tough exterior is a hard one crack, let alone break enough to allow you to worm your way into his stubborn heart!

But once you're there, I can promise you that he isn't letting go that easily! He's your problem now! >:P

Isn't big on PDA at all. He has a image to keep and he doesn't want his team mate to see him weakened (by your charm)! Well- actually its more like he's trying to save both you and himself from their never ending teasing

cause oooo boy!! Those boys are RELENTLESS!! Its such an odd and rare sight for them to see the might hero of time is such a...soft state! You turn the frightening grizzly bear into disgruntled teddy bear with a simple kiss to his cheek!

This isn't to say he'll shove you off of him if you come to hug him, but he will give you a gentle reminder as he gives you a soothing but small rub to your arm before pulling back.

BUT behind closed doors/away from prying eyes?? He will take your loving in strides! (he still gets flustered when you hold hands) The hero will let you smother him until he does need to take a step back to calm down--

His favourite acts of affection to receive (tho he wont admit it) are kisses on the tips of his fingers while you cup his names! He doesn't know why but the act just makes him melt

He still struggles a lot when it comes to giving and receiving love, so please be patient with him!

Speaking of giving love, I see Time as the type of fella that uses gifts as a way to express himself!! He sees an object/item that reminds him of you? Oops, it's in his pocket now :3! You've been taking about this one really rare item to add to your collection? Oh how strange, Time had this little thing laying around, here ya go!

The hero also enjoys just...being in the same room as you! You both could be do your own little tasks, not talking or even sitting that close, but he'll enjoy the company you give him! It might seem strange to others but the simple fact that Time knows your there and within reach is just so...comforting?

The boys have used Time's love and affection for you as a way to protect themselves from his wrath LMAO

Like, World of Realm (link) will be hauling ass as they're running away from the furious spirit until they catch sight of you!! Their saving grace!!

And before you know it, two shaking heroes are hid behind you as your dashing lover comes to a screeching halt infront of you. All you can do is give him a raised eyebrow and curious smirk and boom! legendary hero defeated (turned in a small flustered mess)

But that's not to say you don't quietly chew out the two heroes! Nono! Time is still your lover and you don't appreciate the heroes riling him up so much. This tends to end up with u pull the heroes along to give the hero an apology (if they actually did do something to make him angry/upset) when you darling had the chance to calm down.

Overall, you're relationship is one that starts slow as the hero gets used to being loved once more. It's a lot of figuring out what does and doesn't work within your relationship and how to navigate those challenges!

But even with the difficulties, the hero can and will love you with his full heart (no matter how cold the others say it is) and will do everything in his power to make sure you're kept safe and happy!

Taglist: @the-cucco-nuggie @miadancer24 (If you wanna join it, just ask and I'll add you!)

[destiny-in-the-universe]

current updates + more

Okay so, honestly-

I started feeling a little inspired earlier today and figured I could get some more of my thoughts out- I have a few fanfics in the making, some which are meant to be gifts for people I either follow and/or are my mutuals; there are some which are, of course, meant to be personal ideas I simply decided I wanted to write! Now, I have sort of been in an angst mood as of late but unfortunately a lot of things were happening at the same time and it impaired my ability to write- which is not a great time, mind you though to get the point!

This one is directed to one of my followers and I won't tag them, but they know who they are-

I have been thinking about the tengu! Howard idea I'm working on and holy shit, I can't stop mulling over how it's going to go because not only do I have this not-quite human bird demon about ready to defend his flockmate friend but there's also the actual fight to happen. Now the idea is mostly centered around Howard since Randy is pretty much out for the count during a lot of the fic-

I'm obviously very normal about the tengu! Howard arc because honestly, it should have gotten explored more in canon but that didn't happen which means I'm left having to put pieces together on my own. Now, here's the deal: Howard's link to the tengu and by extent, the Ninja, is a messy, complicated thing-

You have this literal bird demon possessing you, and you're sharing the pain- as is canon, what happens to the Ninja happens with the bird but obviously I am using creative liberty with it and Howard is nothing if not protective of Randy and while it isn't as obvious because, well, it's Howard and our boys are completely dumb of ass- there's the literal fact we've seen Howard lose his goddamn mind every-time something dire happens to Randy and we also see him prone to rage fits

He's never seen Randy truly get hurt as the Ninja until he is and that feeling of flock begins screaming at him- Howard completely loses it, it's as if something deep is burning inside of him and it will come out no matter what. The idea itself is that Howard and Randy are practically soulmates, and well, our favorite orange-coded boy is so upset but he can feel the tengu too

All he can see is the blood. He can hear nothing but the sick thud when Randy- the Ninja hit the ground and now Howard is determined to finish off the Sorcerer (i don't think he's going to kill the Sorcerer, but something will happen-), he feels like he's lost control- filled with rage and panic and determination- and right now, the priority is getting the Sorcerer away from the Ninja because the Ninja is his- no one else can have him

Randy's either unconscious at this point because the suit is trying to save him, or he's weakly trying to get up again- he's not doing so hot and he can't make sense of anything happening, so instead he's just lying there - barely able to move

Randy and Howard are yin and yang, they are soulmates. They're bound to each other, and seeing Randy so weak- unable to do anything- sparks a newfound rage in Howard

I can't specify enough how much this idea is rotating in my brain- I'm trying to work out the introduction scene and I kind of... need help? so if anyone can give me pointers on whether I should start directly with the battle or add a slight bit of 'filler' before it begins, that would be amazing

I might honestly make a playlist for the fic because oh my god- tengu! Howard has so much potential honestly, and I want to shake that puppy up in my teeth but something I also wanted to mention is that I can't imagine how painful it must be that even the Ninja isn't invincible? He's seen Randy take hits before and patched him up, but nothing compares to suddenly seeing him drop like deadweight onto the ground, and the sight of red slowly coming out of his body- and just, Howard can't lose Randy he just can't-

(he feels like there's something rotten in him when he lets the tengu link- sync with his mind and rush after the sorcerer, but if it means his revenge then so be it)

I will be talking about my Kitsune OC and First Ninja story in a completely separate post because I have ideas about that too, but honestly at least one of these fanfictions has to be completed eventually lol- and I have my asks to get through!

Though honestly, I'm going to be writing a lot of angst for RC9GN (like let me see more fanfictions where randy is getting injured, howard's hurt- give me fanfictions where the sorcerer is more powerful). I might do a little thing for my infection AU, but honestly like I have many ideas and not a single one is fully complete- please be patient with me, I'll be done as soon as I can

Things have been a little hectic lately, and well- with my appointment today, which went well actually!, I just haven't had full time to concentrate but without much further ado- I will be signing off for now!

~ Mod Danny

[wereshrew-admirer]

heyo!) just swinging by to tell you that i'm taking you mislabeling my silly lil fanart as a ship/fandom i've heard about for the first time in my life today (just now) as a 'oooh you HAVE to go check out a tabletop gaming podcast (?) ooooh' sign from universe :3c have a gr8 day cheers bye

oh my god PLEASE listen to friends at the table, genuinely i almost put “but op you should really listen to this podcast” in the tags after i figured out i misinterpreted it!

if you can at all tolerate actual play podcasts then FatT is like.. life changing media (i happen to be very autistic about it but most folks i know have also had this “oh i didn’t realize how much of a difference listening to stories made by a thoughtful, self-critical, queer, <list extends> cast makes??” experience. raised the bar impossibly high without being too heavy-handed lol)

it’s a pretty big mass of work though, so if you need help figuring out where to start i’d be happy to!

sangfielle, the one i’d thought you did fanart of, was their most recent season; sort of a weird old western/horror/fantasy. but there’s sci-fi, there’s fantasy, there’s uncanny-atlantic city, there’s <list extends>, and most of them are told using different ttrpgs, so if there’s a game you’re already familiar with that might be a good place to start, or if you start a season and have a hard time following because of the game they’re playing it might be worth it to try another season that could be more intuitive to you. (i’m personally in it for the narrative and the collective storytelling, so i know the game-y aspect can be a lot if you’re not used to it)

editing to add a link to the wiki, it’s very thorough and easy to navigate and might be easier than talking to an insane-about-it stranger:

[wirewitchviolet]

When I said the “AI” projects grifters are pushing were search engines, THIS WAS NOT THE INTENDED TAKEAWAY.

I wrote a blog post a bit ago trying to explain what the things people are presently trying to call “AI” really are, and how the whole thing is a big ol’ grift you shouldn’t touch with a ten foot pole... and I don’t think anyone actually really read that, but since I’ve written it, there sure has been a sharp uptick in stories about people you’d really hope would know better treating them like Ask Jeeves and expecting to get accurate answers to random questions. So... let me try this again.

So first let’s just cover how a search engine actually works. Or at least a simplified version of my personal understanding which is probably a bit out of date so you know, grain of salt.

While we’re used to accessing the internet through handy little URLs like, say, https://www.tumblr.com, those are just sort of handy aliases managed by this whole database setup (domain name servers) which browsers are set up to check if there’s text in there, basically, and what those match them to is numerical addresses. It’s a bit like every website has a phone number. Just as an example, open another tab and just type in oh... 74.114.154.18 and watch it bring you somewhere. They expand things a bit now and then, but basically, much like when a video game has a safe with a 3 digit combination and you don’t feel like solving a puzzle, you can totally just sit there, punch in every possible number, and doing so you’ll eventually see every website there is. It’s only what like 1,000,000,000,000 possible combinations? People who are actually serious about running a search engine will just set up a script that does that, throwing some real processing power at it, locally save every thing that comes up, and also search all those files for every file they point at, links, images, databases, whatever, and save those locally to. A whole lot of computing and a whole lot of storage later, and you literally have a local mirror of the entire internet saved to a huge pile of hard drives. Really this is such a costly endeavor it’s honestly just a handful of people who really do it and everyone else just... quietly passes your searches on to them like some kinda middleman.

Anyway, once you have your local copy of the entire internet, and entirely too much processing power to hit it with, you can do things like... look at every individual page on the entire internet and count how many times every given word appears on them, and if you’re feeling real bold, phrases, getting nice little running tallies to jam into your huge database. Then when a request comes in to give you a web page about seagull poop, you just figure well, there’s this one page that says “seagull” 49 times, “poop” 37 times, and specifically says “seagull poop” 35 times. That seems pretty on-point so you search that up as result number one.

You’ll notice there’s no thinking anywhere in here, just saving files, counting words in them, and doing some data processing on those counts. There IS a bit more to everything of course, like giving extra relevance points if something is in a title or header tag, or how somewhere along the line we all agreed to add these meta tags where people can just say outright what sort of information is on a page on the honor system (extra relevance points if people actually click links too), and someone just deciding wikipedia articles are always good so if there’s a wikipedia article, that gets a ton of bonus relevance points. Having the search string in the URL of the site of course also helps, and somewhere along the line things got gummed up with people abusing the hell out meta tags and also just giving major search engines money in exchange for bonus relevance points. Then much more recently you’ve got software engineers and suckers trying and utterly failing to “improve” results by doing dumb things, like Street Fighter 6 is out, and there’s lots of people looking for info on that, so if someone types like, “Street Fighter 3rd Strike Remy move list” into a query, well, part of that string says “Street Fighter” so let’s give all the results people searching for just that are enjoying lately, and forget the other terms.

Anyway, that’s your standard search engine. People with these sorts of “AI” projects do not, in fact, generally have a local copy of the entire internet saved. Some would like to, but you need a LOT of storage, and also there’s quite a lot of laws and security measures specifically to prevent people from doing that, and even preventing the people we as a society generally agree should be mirroring the whole internet have to leave certain parts out. Now partly they get around that by just completely ignoring that those laws exist and banking on nobody actually enforcing them in any meaningful way. Largely though they want to either avoid blatantly breaking those laws/circumventing security, so they buy “training data” from whoever’s willing to sell it, and also taking measures to obfuscate that it’s all stolen.

Anyway, you know about Markov chains? The basic idea is you have a large body of text you’ve done some statistical analysis on like we have when we archive the whole internet or what chunks we can get our hands on, and we break down the percentages of how likely every word is to come after a given word we’re looking at. Doesn’t have to be words either, you can do it with whatever. But the basic idea is, let’s say your data set is a bunch of tedious nerd posts from the year Portal came out. Now if I start off giving you the word “The” there’s all sorts of things that could come next. “The end” “the next” “the only” or maybe “the cake.” This is totally how that predicted next word thing on your phone works by the way. Anyway to really do this properly you like map out the entire web of phrases you can end up with, but for now let’s just look at that pretty popular combo of “the cake” and keep looking that way, and huh, people sure do follow “cake” with “is” these days, and especially “the cake,” I can look this up in my database easy. So you just keep hitting that next suggested word on your phone, we’re probably getting “The cake is a lie!” out of it. Someone I know loves doing stupid little things with these if you want an example.

This is totally how these “AI” things do the natural speech things, plus maybe some hard rules like “when the prompt is a single word pre-prep the chain by putting “[whatever term] is” into a standard search engine routine and just wholesale life the first sentence you can find that starts with that at the top of a block of text, then Markov chain from there.”

And we want to obscure that we’re doing this so let’s also have a rule like “OK you can go with the best match for the best work so many times in a row, but after that you have to mix it up by taking the second best word. So again, still at the height of Portal fever, we start off seeing this common word sequence, but OK let’s switch it up after “the cake is” and not go with “a” what else do we have? Well, there’s no “the” at the start, but “cake is so delicious and moist” is also real common. That’s another long string of direct quotes though, so again, let’s flag it after so many top matches and use a slightly less common one. And you end up spitting out like, “The cake is so delicious and nutritious.” Hey, that sounds like natural language, AND it’s variations on commonly said things, so it’ll probably read as legit. We’re done here, ship it.

Of course cake ISN’T nutritious, it’s like, pure sugar and gluten. But we don’t have any capacity to think or understand we’re just stringing words together based on how commonly they follow each other. Because again, there is no actual intelligence, creativity, or understanding in here, just data sets and strict procedures on how to pop words from them.

One amusing thing about this is that basically by design, it’s practically guaranteed that this is going to spit out any block of text you can imagine at you, except for the ones that are completely true and coherent. It’s intentionally avoiding ever doing that because you’d spot the plagiarizing immediately.

Oh and the whole “AI generated art” scene is doing this exact same thing. Only difference is there’s an extra step where after they download literally every image ever posted on DeviantArt, they have sweatshops full of people where for like one shiny penny a day, destitiute people pour over things, hacking them up with lasso tools and painstakingly adding meta tags for every possible thing you could for every single image they have, so the program can pull up a bunch of images that all have all the search text and then go like “OK start with this as a base, this has the 20x10 pixel blue right eye tag, does anything else in the batch have that exame tag? Cool, let’s select one of those and paste it over this eye, now, how are we on 30x40 slightly reddish upturned nose tags?” etc. etc. etc. More impressive parlor trick to pull off, but it’s still prettty plainly theft.

Anyway, this is all a thing, as I think I said, because all the people left holding the bag when everyone realized crypto/NFTs/the metaverse/etc. was a gigantic pyramid scheme have absurd amounts of processing power in big warehouses and it’s all going faulty and looking bad from being under too much heat and running too long so it’s hard to sell on eBay, so, what other scam can we do with it? Aha, fake AI.

And all the people who continue to fall for that hook line and sinker should not have the jobs they do because that level of being a gigantic mark proves them unfit to do really anything that involves any sort of decision making, do what you can to have them removed.

Also maybe give me money? I’m at risk of death otherwise.

[bewitched-bullet]

Hi bewitched-bullet,

I'm the anon who talked about their "irreconcilable differences" when it comes to how to portray the characters the other day. I only mentioned it in passing because my main point was their lack of communication. Now I'd like to elaborate on the character portrayals. Like I said I've followed them for a year. And for the last 5-6 months I've observed their interactions on an almost daily basis.

(I'm a peaceful and gentle person and I hope my writing has reflected those qualities)

TL;DR: John has been trying to establish the relationship as a middle-aged couple; Sherlock's characterization is more in Series 1.

During this short six months, I've seen John's love declarations at least 4 times, which was either doubted, ignored, or "forgotten" the next day by Sherlock. Not big declarations, but those that came naturally as a result of the scene. John was apparently discouraged (since probably 3 months ago? It's so hard to search the posts with the Archive turned off) and even stopped acting jealous when there was Sheriarty. Oh, there was one time, I think your other followers may also remember, that John and Sherlock talked about John playing clarinet. It was a huge reblogged post and in the end John posted a photo of him playing clarinet with a ring on his finger. When followers pointed it out,John asked Sherlock something like "what could you deduce from me wearing your family heritage ring?" The question never got a reply. I'll send you links of love declarations when I get some free time to search through the blog.

Sherlock, on the other hand, is portrayed mostly as in series 1: reckless, brilliant, petulant, etc. and cranks up those qualities even more than Series 1. From time to time he forgets Rosie's existence. He also adds a characteristic that was not in BBC canon: Sherlock's lack of understanding of common daily expressions, like heart=feelings. I've seen him given anatomy lessons to followers when it came to "heart" and such. When followers questioned how he was able to go around his work if he didn't understand very common expressions or having edibles at home when Rosie lived there, John explained something like, "oh, he's toying you guys. That's not the case". The thing is that Sherlock behaves the same with John, so "toying with followers" doesn't explain it. The real reason is that they see characters at different timelines/ life stages.

I haven't followed them long, but I could already see for a while now that they couldn't meet in the middle ground, so the problem went back even further. I saw posts that saying the group doesn't talk as mods. Let's say that I wouldn't be surprised considering the lack of communication I've observed. This mess could have handled so much better if they had real communication along the way. They should have parted their ways a long time ago if they successfully communicated that the differences were irreconcilable. Personally I don't think it'll ever work out with zero behind the scenes, especially among characters with a long complicated canon history.

Best Regards

These are extremely good points for the role play community.

If their interpretation of a character they are playing doesn't vibe well, be cordial and try different characters, make adjustments, or separate ways.

The John mod mentioned that they have a 3 year history of rping together. The blogs are only.....2 years old? So they were rping together for a year before coming to tumblr.

If the John mod was dissatisfied with their character chemistry and rp style(s), a year is more than enough time to figure that out.

Of course people can change their minds. But as we have seen from Mycroft/John and Harriett mods, they refuse to speak out of character to deal with the more serious issues.

It's a mess

Search tag "a scandal in tumblr" for more info.

[kinomiakai]

Kill yourself, fucked up virgin fag.

Oh my god, no way!!! Hi g.o.d.!!! What the hell happened to you, I thought you’d gone to therapy and learned to constructively deal with your anger or something!!

You guys, this person has been telling me to off myself since I started posting How to Break a Mask. THAT WAS IN 2006. On fanfiction.net!! It took a literal ten years to be posted, sporadically and randomly and with multiple year hiatuses, and every chapter, without fail, my first comment would be some variation of this. Sometimes they add a “delusional” for some spice, but it always has this very specific format. They never changed it up. My favourite part is how they think “virgin” has the same gravitas and insult as an actual slur. I feel like that is such an insight into the mind. And it was always my first comment! Sometimes within the first ten minutes of posting, which is fascinating, because it meant they were either obsessively searching the sasuke and naruto character tags, they were a group of people dedicated to the very specific cause of telling kids to kill themselves, or they were a bot of some sort. And since it happened with such frequency and the wording was so consistent, I was pretty convinced they were a bot. Even when I saw them pop up on ao3 - weird that they were still going, but I was still getting sporadic messages on FFN, so I figured they’d still been around somehow. But then it tapered off, so I thought the bots had broken & the person behind them had moved on to being a human being or something - but now! This has completely thrown that theory for a loop. You’re on tumblr???? Do you have an account?? Do you search through author pages, desperate to find someone who links to a social media?? That must take so much time!!!

I’m so fascinated. Am I going to get messages like this randomly now? Is it going to be tied to when I promote a fic? Is it specifically tied to the ao3 share function?? Do you get paid to do this?? How do you have time to do anything else?? Oh man. Holding my breath for next month, I can’t believe I might get some more answers to this mystery. I so wish this was in the era of broken tumblr where you could look at the source code of an anon ask and find their ip address 😂 I won’t reply to too many more asks like this if I keep getting them - I always deleted them on FFN because I noticed it tended to make my readers sad & that’s the direct opposite of what I want my fics to do, but if I have a new theory, I might! Also, I noticed people talking about them like they were new on ao3 and I feel like I need to spread the word about this obsessive little weirdo. That’ll be their tag, in case you want to blacklist!

Anyway, uh. Same time next month? I guess we’ll find out :D

[burntblueberrywaffles]

My 2023 recap (but it's through all my favorites posts I've made this year)

I started this in december and intented the post it a bit earlier but life got crazy busy;; anyway finally posting part 1! there will be a part 2 because this got a bit more out of hand than expected, and tumblr has a 30 images cap per post RIP

post are under the cut, they've all been dated and linked ❤️

Jan 22nd

Me: please send me asks! I want to get them! I’ll answer them for sure!

Also me when I actually receive an ask:

Jan 28th

Fev 1st

Fev 7th

Me every time I hear a song that slightly reminds me of my ship:

Fev 7th

I love when my mutuals talk about themselves in the tags, like oh, new bit of lore just dropped

Fév 19th

Me when I see Game Changer clips but I don’t have dropout:

Mar 27th

Apr 2nd

Apr 5th

Apr 7th

My problem is that whenever I enter a new fandom, I binge read a ton of incomplete fanfics, subscribe to all of them, and then when I get a chapter update for one of them I just

Apr 9th

Me listening to drinking song for the socially anxious:

Apr 10th

Apr 13th

may 12th

Netflix stop cancelling my favorite shows after 1 season challenge

June 6th

June 7th

Me seeing porn bots following my account again:

June 7th

Watching spiderverse 2 like

June 20th

I'm not gonna add a video to this post cause it's too much of a hassle, but this is the Hyde stick figure edit, that you can find here :3

June 21st

Me before: I don’t know if I should tell people that I’m autistic, what if they judge me

Me when I meet new people now:

June 22nd

The delicate balance between protecting your peace and being a nosy bitch

June 24th

June 26th

How am I supposed to touch grass in these conditions

July 2nd

Whoopsie! Your anxiety manifested itself as distrust and now everyone hates you

July 2nd

Someone: Um actually if you look at the books/comics/other tv shows it’s canon that-

Me:

July 2nd

guess what i did today

July 5th

July 8th

July 10th

July 14th

What they don’t tell you about the autism diagnosis is that soon enough you’ll constantly be looking at characters of tv shows and movies like

July 17th

Some very specific memes about my comic con weekend

July 19th

Me every day of my life

July 27th

when you see one of your mutuals reblog something from another one of your mutuals, when they had no previously known relation

[cenviswasteland]

For the fanfiction writing ask: 10, 18, 20 and 22 please. Also sorry for encountering the fandom loon in these parts, hope that doesn't sour your tumblr experience.

hey!! thanks so much for the ask :D let's talk!

[Re: "The Fandom Loon". to anyone that comes across this post after the fact, i recently got bombarded with spam asks from one particular person. feel free to follow this specific link if you'd like to experience the whole story hahaha. also no, my tumblr experience isn't soured in the slightest. i found it all pretty funny at the time.]

10. Do you work on multiple wips or stick to one fic at a time?

it tends to come in waves for me. i'll get the idea for one (1) fic, which adds itself to the pile of "things i'm writing". i'll work on one fic as inspiration hits, forget about it for an extended period of time, and then pick it back up again. this happens for every single fic i'm working on, as well as all my original pieces.

it's not an ideal way to operate, since it slows down my process severely, but eventually my AO3 will be populated by a whole bunch of really, really good work. i hope. right now it's a baren wasteland. oops. i promise i'll have some good fic content coming soon! i just have to get back into the swing of writing characters that are not my own.

18. Do you enjoy research? Which fic of yours required the most research?

oh, i LOVE doing research. it's probably my favorite part of the process. for example:

sorry, i know it's a little hard to see, but this is a FULL rack of tabs that i was using for my writing at one point. it's all direct research pages, note-taking google docs, etc etc. my wife (love her to pieces) eventually told me "that's going to destroy your computer" and made me bookmark and close like 90% of them, though. they live on, though! hahaha.

generally speaking, any AU fic is gonna require a little extra research. i really want to do "it" right if that makes sense. so that's looking up common tropes for the AU, background history / knowledge if needed, looking at other fics that have the same AU, etc etc. i'm not a super published fic author (sorry), but Promise it to me. took a lot of external research to get the terminology and speech right.

20. Do you prefer writing AUs or canon fics?

if we're talking in terms of "traditional AUs" (coffee shop, flower shop x tattoo parlor, college, fantasy, rockstar etc), i actually don't write a lot of them. i was working on a flower / tattoo fic at some point with a buddy, but that was between our OCs and it kind of flickered out. i'm kind of unpracticed when it comes to AU fics.

but more broadly, every fic i write is an AU or canon divergence in some way. such is the way of fanfiction. but i tend to stick closer to canon than i do to AUs. that's not to say that i don't love me an AU fic, but they tend to take a little more time (see above) and they don't go down as smooth for me. maybe that'll change with more practice. who knows? :D

22. Do you title your fics before, during, or after the writing process? How do you come up with titles?

at the end of the day, i'm a song-lyric-title guy through and through. when i get a song in my head, it actually really helps me figure out where i'm going with a piece. so that's where most of my titles come from.

before i get to that point, though, i'll usually make my title a keysmash or some basic descriptor. sometimes i tag the piece with a temporary name or something else basic:

and it's actually pretty rare for me to pull out a full, original title. not impossible! but very, very rare.

in general, if i'm not actively stealing a song lyric, the title will just be some description of what the piece actually is. i'm not a very creative guy when it comes to titles, haha.

===+++===

thanks again for the ask! again, i'm really happy i get to talk about my work and writing in general. if anybody else wants to send in an ask or two, you can find the prompt list here!

peace love and little donuts! have a nice day :D

[lividria]

i swear every time i get into a game that has an actual community it'll feel like i just woke up on mars because i usually dig really deep into a game's lore, history, trivia, unused content, etc. and THEN i'll find stuff from the community and i don't even mean for that to happen it just works that way and it always plays out the exact same way without fail besides for when there is no community

like, a week or two ago i remembered OFF exists, watched a whole playthrough of it, have been listening to it's OST an unhealthy amount (I'm doing it right now, Unreasonable Behavior is so good), i go onto tumblr, first OFF post i see once i add it's tag to my feed is someone's art for an AU where all the characters all like hang out at a cafe together or something and everything is chill, which is like the antithesis of everything i had just experienced related to the game and i couldn't help but laugh in confusion once i realized what i was looking at

i go in the discord server for iconoclasts after obsessing over the game for like a year and annoying the fuck out of my friends about it, literally the only fanmade character i have seen is a chemico contra member who's also a phlebotomist, i had to google what a phlebotomist is and like... i didn't look into their lore by ctrl-f-ing or whatever so i'm probably missing something, but how do you come to this conclusion (actually i think i know, they mentioned they actually became one at some point after making this character which is really funny actually)

i start watching videos about pikmin after finally beginning to slowly come off one of the most intense hyperfixations i've had in my entire life to the point i had played through all 5 games in the series and dedicated weeks and entire days to trying to figure out the lore before giving up because it's nintendo lol and spending a roughly equal amount of time trying to come up with intentionally terrible ideas for more games in the series only to accidentally get WAY too into it (see my alph wraith post lol), i am greeted with Fiddlebert, and a later a dub of an AU where the player character is actually a wraith and is hiding it from the rest of the rescue corps (this post is still probably one of the funniest jokes i've ever seen) and the entire thing scarily resembles the type of shit i'd write if i was given this premise to work with down to the mention of an innocent child being consumed that's first brought up with a doodle of them saying "Oh boy I sure do hope being alive!" while holding The Goo THAT'S EXACTLY HOW I TREAT HORRIBLE EVENTS IN MY STORIES WHEN I'M TALKING ABOUT THEM

i look at the tag for ultrakill on tumblr and feel like i just got sent to hell myself with the punishment of being stuck in a permanent state of confusion due to the sheer contrast to the source material all the fanart has, same goes for most of the posts about it in general actually, i go in expecting like blood & violence and instead i'm greeted with gabriel & v1 making out. drawn by 50 different users. (i don't even need to link anything here just check #ultrakill you'll see)

and this isn't even touching on all of the ships i've seen that are utterly incomprehensible to me because. like. why magolor and the snowman enemy? why kingsly and puddle??? i thought alph didn't like louie? wait also what do you mean at least two people's headcanon is that louie is trans? (ok i couldn't re-find some of the things in this paragraph and i'm too tired to conduct an in-depth search but you could probably find it if you looked)

i'm not hating on anything i brought up here it's just a bunch of funny examples i think about a lot now that i've seen them, you guys go do whatever you want even if i don't get it go have fun lol, i just love the feeling of pure confusion when i walk into the room and get punched in the face with a complete subversion of my expectations because it feels like i'm missing SO MUCH CONTEXT and i never get used to it i love it i love the internet

[ballyblee]

ok not to add on to an already long post but i was having a hard time consolidating my thoughts in the tags so here's an essay

tldr; it's the shading (cel vs. soft) i think and also pokemon is the most valuable franchise and has no excuse

i've been staring at these pictures for a while now. just trying to figure out what exactly it is that makes these feel wrong. i think it's finally hit me that it's the shading?

[note: i'm no professional artist, i'm in college and i'm still learning. also i'm going to mostly just reuse the same pictures from before (so i don't have to hunt down new ones and because these are the ones made me realize it)]

here's a quick resource for the difference between cel shading and soft shading! and if you're too lazy to click the link, here's a picture comparing them from the site:

soft shading is generally for paintings, cel shading is generally for cartoons. (obviously this is not the rule, just an observation) (also bonus: for a long time i thought it was cell shading with two Ls because the blobs used to make shadows are cell-shaped. it is actually cel shading with one L because it comes from the material they used to use for animations called celluloid. source)

anyways, pokemon.

i noticed that in the pictures that were definitely pulled from the 3D art, the shading blended together oddly compared to its previous counterparts. you could argue that it's simply an artistic choice, but they didn't carry that across the board. here's fuecoco:

if you look at the shadow lines across the middle section of his belly or on his tongue, you can see that it is pretty crisp. there's no giant gradient blending the shadow in. on the other hand, the highlights on his hands and knee clearly have uneven brush strokes. these still come across as rounded objects. you can compare them to the harsh highlight lines of his toenails. (claws? foot decor? i don't know) this was the first official gen 9 2D art released, so they established a long time ago that they were using cel shading still.

point 1: the orbs

speaking of rounded objects, let's look at lokix's face. it's an orb. funnily enough, we've got plenty of orbs to compare to from previous pokemon. so here's a side-by-side of lokix's face with tentacruel's head orbs. (warning: i will be saying the word orb a lot. it's what the dex entries say and i don't know what else to call them.)

the blending in the dark center of lokix's face is different from tentacruel's orbs. lokix's face is blended into itself in the exact center, while tentacruel's orbs have a sharp-edged circle that is slightly offset. the two small highlight circles on lokix do not sell the "shiny, hard shell" effect, especially when compared to the bright circles on tentacruel. even still, the larger highlight circle is blended into the base color of lokix's face, making it less like a shine and more like a highlight. lokix is supposed to be shiny - he's got an exoskeleton. look at literally any bug ever and the first thing you notice is how hard and shiny and reflective it is.

point 2: the grabbers

oh look, more rounded objects. (hint, this is a really good way to tell imo) here's a comparison of tentacruel's tentacles versus toedscruel's (in this chunk i'm going to call them tenta and toeds because their names are so similar):

maybe you've also noticed. not all highlights are created equal. tenta's has long brush strokes and a harsh line between light and midtone. compare that to poor toeds. he's got a perfectly circular highlight that blends completely into the midtone. it's not nearly as dramatic or aesthetically pleasing as tenta's. also, you can see tenta's start to follow along the length of his tentacle, a thing that doesn't happen on toeds. it makes for not just a less interesting design, but one that has less energy - not a thing people really want in their art.

point 3: the lines?

in the kindest way possible. what are these lines. you can really see them in the grayscale image. there's just. lines of light. that cut across baxcalibur's body. there's no dimension to them to make it seem like he's round. they just. are these streaky lines. i don't even know what to say about this because it's genuinely just so confusing to me. they show up in some of the other 3D-to-2D pieces, too - i.e. scroll back up to the full body lokix.

ok, the art's weird. so what?

everyone makes mistakes, nobody's perfect, etc. sometimes art is just weird. maybe the company ran out of time to hand draw all of the pokemons' official art and this is simply a faster alternative that gets the job done. who cares?

pokemon is the most valuable franchise in the entire world. it's got a chokehold on just about every single person who was a child anywhere from 1996 to now. it has legs in video games, trading card games, tv shows, kids toys, even like. the travel industry. pokemon makes money.

so why couldn't they hire an artist to draw these?

why couldn't they have postponed the release of the game/art until everything was completed?

they would have lost... not enough money to make that much of an impact. however, they knew that this would be enough for them to get by. they knew that this was acceptable, and acceptable still sells as long as it's got the pokemon logo on it.

we as a whole are okay with settling with less. the more we become okay with poor quality, the less pokemon as a company will try. the more quality goes down, the more quantity goes up. the more quantity goes up, the more quality is lowered in every aspect, not just the 2D art. that's why SV feels so cheaply made at times. because it was.

maybe you're okay with the quality being bad and the games being fun for you. but the people who are creating this game - and i mean actually creating, not the people who sit and delegate tasks all day but the people who are writing and drawing and sculpting and coding and everything else - they are going to be so incredibly overworked. (and we all know they definitely aren't getting paid enough) you can already see the bits and pieces of people wanting to care in SV - clearly this story is so well thought out and these characters bring a depth and personality to everything they are a part of. however, it is undeniably faulty because these creators were clearly pushed to get this game out before christmas. even now, these 2D artists ended up having to copy 3D sprites so they could meet the deadline.

personally, i'd rather have a game that people care about and are allowed to take the time to care about it than a game every 6 months. i say this as someone who has cared about pokemon for more than half of their life.

I’ll be bringing this up in my coming review of Spidops but some of the official artwork looks directly traced (or even auto-generated, with a few touch-ups) from the in-game models and it damn near hurts my soul. The artwork is the “real face” of a Pokemon and typically has more personality than the 3d graphics, because the drawings and the models exist for different purposes. The models are made to function in a 3d animated game. The drawings are made to look good and represent the character. THIS DOES NOT LOOK GOOD, and it’s glaringly cheap for something that over a hundred artists on my dash every day could have done better. As I’ll also be repeating in the Spidops review, its tcg card shows how much personality its design is capable of conveying: