#Not so alive mari

[koko-duckiee]

Au fan arts that I did out of memory traditionally

[softhe4rted]

to begin with, the sweet grass by mary oliver, from “devotions”

[technically-human]

St. Hilarion's ghost story

[zeaceos]

Bad End Theater x OMORI

bought Bad End the other day and I finished it in one sitting! I absolutely adored the art style and the pixel art it sparked me to rise from the grave and post something on my socials

[hydrus101]

It’s so fascinating to me about how much of Malevolent centers around bad or misguided fathers.

We spend ample amounts of time with Arthur’s grief and his faults, his fear of fatherhood, his failings of Faroe and the ensuing spiral afterwards. We hear of Bella’s strict upbringing, of Daniel’s controlling nature, the desire to shape his daughter into what he expected her to be, and even admitting to Arthur’s face that he intended to mold him as well, into what he thought his daughter’s husband should be. We learn of Larson’s betrayals, the sacrifices of his children: the monsters he made of those he should’ve loved, all in the pursuit of power and legacy. There’s an argument to be made even, of fragments and reflections and daughter and sons, that the King - that initial version of him now dead in all respects - was a sort of father, with John and Yellow as his residuals, his sons, his heirs, in a way. Finding their own identities now, free from the shadow of a predecessor, free to chose their own destinies, wether that is to separate themselves entirely, to scream defiantly of humanity and hope and self, or to try and reshape the visage of that dead malevolent god in desperate pursuit of love that wasn’t given, driven by a hate that was shared. What other analogy so seamlessly fits with the relationship between Arthur and Yellow than that of a neglectful father? The one who was supposed to be patient, be caring, be kind, the one who was supposed to teach this new being, this new child, about what life could be like? What love and kindness it could hold? But Arthur was too unsteady then. Too unstable to give Yellow the upbringing that he deserved. His nature was shared with John, and we’ve seen the depths of love he’s embraced. Yellow was simply nurtured wrong, encouraged down that spiral by a foster father who embraced and even venerated his rage. And similarly, in the basement in New York, we are reminded of nature and nurture, of animals and babes. Briefly, quick as a glance, we learn of the Butcher’s father, both a seething livewire and a subtle undercurrent in his motivations, manifested, perhaps, in his tumultuous relationship with failure, his self inflicted violence. Roland and Amanda receive less of the spotlight, but the foundations of everything are built upon their relationship. And now, with the Unclean, we know more of Arthur’s own father—who’s fate is known and the same as his mother’s—and his envy towards his friend, his childish jealousy and vindictive actions, of which he now condemns, having learned better, having known better. Every aspect of the narrative is seeped in fatherhood, in parenting, in children. Malam says as much by the fire: “They are our betters, our futures, our learned mistakes.” Malevolent is, at its core, about parents and children and hope.

And now, Arthur and John are on the run from a mother, on a mission given to them by a father, who’s daughter is largely a mystery, or perhaps, more familiar than we might think.

[eastofedean]

I suppose I love this life, in spite of my clenched fist.

[angels in america, tony kushner || olive trees with yellow sky and sun, vincent van gogh || joseph campbell || the big empty, supernatural || invitation, mary oliver || the sun, edward munch || staying alive, mary oliver || 1 january 1965 poem, joseph brodsky || take me with you, andrea gibson]

[likesummerrainn]

AEW Dynamite | 08.07.24

[zeeckz]

[ghastlyaffairs]

for something as trivial and simple those feelings sure are hard to get rid of

also made a gif a version for fun + alt version with no tears under the cut

the gif is in very low resolution...this is a feature (i could make it bigger but that would require saving each frame individually and than glueing it all together. also i feel like low resolution suits it better. aesthetically and fits the mood)

[sotc]

the fact that bioware wrote in a line from harding mentioning sera by name about her being part of the inquisition despite the fact that you can choose to not recruit her which effectively overwrites a player's canon and establishes a bioware canon that sera joins the inquisition????? meanwhile zevran cannot even be mentioned by name at all !?!?!?

[watchoutpaul-hemightkickyourhead]

midway through watching saf (spies are forever). Here are my notes:

Fucking badass curt

Oh they're (curt and owen) gay aren't they. Gonna be so mad if they aren't fruits

Joey's British accent, shockingly, not the worse one I've heard. Sounds very suffolk-essex border (similar to my accent). Not perfect but not bad. Like 7/10

It's time to save the woooorld again

ITS TIME TO GET THE GIRLL AGAINNNNN

ONCE A SPY ALWAYS A SPY FOREVERRRRRRR

"old boy". Thats it. Thats the note

Oh my fucking god curt that's why we don't litter

CURT WTF DONT LEAVE YOUR BOYFRIEND BEHIND

selfish git

Oh. Oh no. No curt.

Oh curt baby.

Oh he an alchaholic baby

HIM AND HIS (romantic) PARTNERRRR OWEEEEEEEEN

Oh cynthia i havent even met you and you're already a badass bitch

Slightly worse british accents but its chill

wowza he's (DMA) scary

Oh the bombseller is a vibe. Great song

Oh she pretty. Pretty Russian woman. SWEAR TO GOD IF SHES THE "BOND GIRL"-

Sorry hes late guys got a lot on his plate guys🎶

Sit down! Fuck you! You're fucking dead!

The smiley face was very important

So how, in the FLIPPETY FLAPPETY FUCK

Oh well aren't you the 𝒶𝓇𝓉𝒻𝓊𝓁𝓁 𝒻𝓊𝒸𝓀𝒾𝓃ℊ 𝒹ℴ𝒹ℊℯ𝓇

oh wowza he's (DMA) CREEPY

YESSSS the fucking 𝘽𝙀𝘼𝙍𝙍𝙍𝙍𝘿𝘿𝘿

YOU YOU GOTTA!

love that type of mother son dynamic

Tessa netting my BELOVED

Pay attention has gotta be my favourite song so far it scratches my brain just right

"Acctually holding LIQUOOOR" "im off it" YES POP OFF CURT BEAT THAT ALCHAHOLISM

barb hes gay give up

barb

barb hes a fruitcake stop

barb you dont need him ill kiss you instead

Candlestick? Apple? Fucking paperclip? Looks like a GUN TO ME

WHO DO YOU THINK WILL BE SHAVING YOU-HOOO

yeahhhh get that beard off

The beard looked uncomfortable to wear

OH CUUUURRT YOUR SO DREAAAAAMMMMYYY

Barb larvenour I LOVE YOU

Watching the rest soon!

[farshootergotme]

Before I knew what I know now about Robin (Dick Grayson in particular) I used to think that the whole "Batman is Robin's father" was a very popular interpretation that wasn't actually canon and people just thought it was cool. I also thought it was cool, so whenever I saw something of the Teen Titans (2003) I was always like "I wish Robin saw Batman as his dad. Idc if he has parents, Batman is so much cooler :("

[man-down-in-hatchet-town]

So I Spied Another Day...

You know it was a good show when you can’t decide whether your heart is so full from all the love and joy, or so empty because it's over.

Really do buckle up, because this is a long one.

So the show went a little like this. They played the Spies pro-shoot on a giant movie screen, but any time a song started, the audio changed to the instrumental track, the video typically faded to simple background graphics, and the cast came out to perform the number live in concert style. There were also a series of audience participation prompts up on the movie screen, such as standing to deliver a line in unison, giving Lauren a standing ovation for the Pay Attention! Reprise, enthusiastically booing Dr. Baron von Nazi and the still infuriatingly catchy Not So Bad (for anyone who’s curious, in addition to encouraging boos and yelled disagreements with von Nazi, they also cut the audience participation bit from the song).

The energy in the room was so electric and full of joy and warmth. People shouted out iconic lines, went wild for everyone’s entrances, and absolutely lost their damn minds over Curtwen at pretty much every opportunity. And the cast were clearly having just as much fun. Doing This has always been my favorite, and there was something so sweet about them singing it again all these years later. We finally got Joey performing Spies Are Forever (Evil Reprise) again and it was just as chilling and beautiful as you’d expect. And One Step Ahead was just on a whole new level. I don’t want to give anything away, but the details in that performance were INCREDIBLE.

It was simply so special seeing most of the original gang come back while also bringing some new friends along. Shout out to Mariah for coming out at the top of the show so ready to play, setting the tone for the whole evening. Shout out to James for putting his comedy chops on full display (LET JAMES BE FUNNY MORE) and dancing the hell out of One More Shot (another favorite number). And shoutout to Carlos Alazraqui (taking over the roles of Sergio and Vladimir Poopin) and Tommy Link for coming into this crazy part of our world with such enthusiasm and silliness. Brian deserves a medal for agreeing to once again play the most cringe-worthy character in all of Pulp-StarCanWrecked history, and for sounding so fucking good while doing it. Tessa was having a blast in full unhinged glory and I gladly worship at her altar. Lauren is maybe the funniest person alive and deserved her standing ovation, prompted or not. Seeing Joe Walker perform live has been Item Number One on my fandom bucket list since I moved to LA a couple of years ago, and I still can’t quite believe I managed it. I’d wondered if he’d be rusty, but honestly he sounded great; it was like no time had passed. Mary Kate still has one of my all-time favorite voices and her Tatiana remains forever engaging. Joey showed up dressed to slay as a gay evil genius Bond-movie supervillain and proceeded to thoroughly deliver on that promise. And Curt… every time I watch Spies I am increasingly blown away by what he does with this arrogant, broken mess of a character. He clearly loves Agent Mega as much as any of us, and to see a performance refined and powered by such clear and thoughtful passion is just a huge treat.

(And while he wasn’t in the cast, I can’t not mention Corey. Between his roles as director and co-writer, so much of what Spies is comes directly from him and we don’t appreciate that nearly enough. And shout out to Esther Fallick for her wonderful work as Susan and the Informant. She might not have been there in person, but her incredible performance was with us the whole time.)

I know this is preaching to the choir, but Spies Are Forever really is such a special show. It’s a story about recovery, and devastating as it can be, I think there’s also something deeply healing about it at its core. For one thing, I know it played a huge role in mending my relationship with my asexuality. I will forever be grateful to it for existing, to TCB, Talkfine, and the original cast for creating it, and to those same people for maintaining its legacy with the amount of love and care it deserves. It was a privilege to be in the room as so many people came to celebrate this miraculous little musical. There were a couple of minor tech glitches (I wonder if they’ll even include the “big one”—the projector jumping over most of the staircase scene before getting fixed—in the digital ticket version), but nothing that could even begin to damper the magic of the night.

We all know that spies never die (except for Owen and the Informant, oops). And at times like this concert, I think this special little show with its short run in 2016 will prove to be just as immortal.

[bleedingpomegranate]

the earth is spinning. we can't just stand on it. 𓍊𓋼⊹𓆏

1 January 1965, joseph brodsky [trans. george l. kline] / dexter (2006-2013); s4e12 "the getaway" / ruby elliott / a voice from i don't know where, mary oliver / @engulfes / dino ahmetović / kedi (2016) dir. ceyda torun / i thought on his desire for three days, linda gregg / the iliad, homer / murder in the yoga store, peter ross range / the fourth sign of the zodiac, mary oliver / @sunsbleeding (x) / jh hard / @arthoesunshine / to be alive, gregory orr / @senaycuce (x) / agatha christie

[x-mensirens]

[macabregoria]

looking at the ib tags and coming away with the thought that wow some people really need to (re)play this game and take time to actually understand what’s happening in it