#Not a calm collected leader who fights out of necessity

[azure--gunslinger]

They really need to make a Transformers movie that really focuses on Optimus, and more importantly has his personality intact. Something that's usually only glimpsed in the live action movies if not just overwritten entirely.

So no bayverse, not this transformers one nonsense where they are just making them into power rangers (and I say that as a huge power rangers fan)

Give us a real Optimus movie and do it before we lose the heart and soul of the character, Peter Cullen.

I got to meet him this past weekend and get his autograph and it was amazing to briefly converse with him.

[st-asya]

The stabbing scene, my beloved. I feel like I'll never run out of something to say, gonna be a habit of mine to never stop talking about it. My first post about it was the first thing that came to my mind, then I read the posts in the reblogs (and discovered a whole new world of the fascinating details I didn't even think of before), and they made me think of taking a closer look at this scene, but from a different angle.

Originally the post was supposed to contain nothing but the third paragraph, but I got a little carried away, so... (I swear to God, someday I'll write a book about this scene). This is gonna be endless cause making several posts doesn't feel right for some reason. I've never used so many parentheses in one post till now.

Ed somehow managed to make 'stab me' sound more sexually charged than 'fuck me', talk about having a way with words. I mean I know the whole scene imitates life (hence this scene is art), well, a certain intimate part of life, obviously, but still...

He is not even trying to make it sound at least a little less intense. He sounds almost demanding, but it's with a pretty soft touch to it still (dare I say seductive?) ('stab me') and very calm, collected, encouraging ('run me through') as if not to scare Stede off cause this whole training session is taxing enough as it is already, Ed's hesitation or uncertainty wouldn't make things better for sure, so he needs to maintain an aura of a confident leader. He calls the shots, after all (and he just wants to be yours, Stede).

The way Ed carries himself in this scene is beautiful, charming even, to the point it's a tad sad, to the point you might wanna find a way to protect him for his own good, so there's this bittersweet kinda feeling. He's being borderline painfully sincere, there's no pretence of any kind because that harsh manner of dealing with the situation is the only one he's familiar with so he gives it his all, cuz there's literally nothing else to channel this energy into, I suppose. I find it marvelous cause he's so authentic in his ability to show it completely unashamedly (not only out of necessity, you gotta have balls to do it too). That's just who he is, take it or leave it (well, so far at least). The sad part is to be sincere is to be vulnerable, soft, to let your guard down (and it's scary as fuck) and, understandably, Ed has a certain kinda problem with that.

It's not a fight with an enemy, he doesn't have to be worried about being killed, but he still chooses to teach a lesson by letting Stede hurt him basically, of his own volition (he had it done to him dozens of times, he's a tough guy, we get that, but stabbing is stabbing, he can get used to it alright, but it doesn't change the fact that he still has his guts rearranged somehow and I'm sure it can't really feel good (well certainly not when a bloody sword is involved and not some other thing that can also penetrate the body which is not the case, even if it looks like (is meant to look like) some bizarre interaction of some pretty intimate nature, the situation is far from the possibility of either of them being docked, cause the damn ship is in the middle of nowhere, and the damn sword goes somewhere it does not belong under ordinary (well relatively) circumstances). So if we're not talking about the metaphorical interpretation (which is hard to ignore), it's a pretty tough way to teach someone how to do something.

What I'm saying is they didn't have to go all the way cuz it's a simulation (but piracy is very much real and it's not exactly a bed of roses, you gotta be prepared or you're gonna get killed, brutal and unfair as it is, it's the way life operates), but Ed still went for it. A pretty selfless thing to do, and what's interesting about it is it's not about feeding his ego (maybe it's because it's well-fed already btw, I mean all the legends, rumors and whatnot, I'm not saying Ed is full of himself, the analogy about being hungry and being fed has just crossed my mind for some reason, and I wanted to put it here), he clearly cares and not for some selfish reasons (even though he could, oh God, that's starting to look like a separate post).

I may be overthinking and overanalyzing it (not only this part, but the post as a whole, but oh well), but there's another fascinating thing about this scene, and it's the placement of the wound. It's in the stomach. In some Slavic languages 'stomach' literally means 'life' if we talk about its archaic usage, they even sound similar there, in English it's the word not only for a body part, but also for the ability to put up with something (well, with a certain kind of discomfort that Ed needs to endure for it to be profitable for Stede in the future in this case). So one would say it's a pretty vital part of a body (Ed himself admits there are important bits there, after all), and Ed doesn't protect it from Stede, doesn't conceal it. Even if it's essentially counterproductive. Not only does he say 'stab me', he literally shows where, gets the jacket out of the way, partially gets rid of the leather that's become his second skin which helps him feel safe, protected, an extra layer distancing him from an unpredictable outer world he's defenceless against and has no control over, shows he's vulnerable, naked if you will. Literally, cause there is a sliver of bare skin.

He literally trusts him with his life. With a fraction of it for now. Voluntarily. But he's still in control cause he knows how to navigate Stede's newfound ability to cause damage in such a way that he doesn't get hurt badly (it's 'I cleverly took the sword on the left', not 'you ran the sword through there', but at the same time it's 'you managed to avoid all the important bits' (he freaking WINKS at Stede (well, kinda.

or I'm just going insane cause I've stared at this bit of the vid and rewound it an unhealthy number of times), can you be any less subtle, my dude, you're down BAD), that sounds like an encouragement of sorts, like a 'well done' from a teacher helping his student gain confidence, I would even say it sounds kinda like a thank you for not betraying his trust, for not abusing his vulnerability, I mean Stede hardly comes off as some batshit insane type with no knowledge of boundaries, but you never know, especially when you've just met him). Ed trusts him, but he's still alert. But he's already ready to risk his comfort (which includes a wide range of things) for Stede to stay safe if his life is ever in danger.

The question which one of them fell first might be up for debate, but the fact that Ed fell harder is pretty evident, I think.

[disco-cola]

i hope people understand that it doesn’t end at a ceasefire. a ceasefire is a necessity, not the goal. the goal is to end the occupation, bring down the wall, independence and freedom for palestinians which is what will bring them their basic human rights. on palestinian land at that, they don’t want equal rights in israel, they need their homeland back, at least parts of it. there has to be a new division plan. and also we all collectively should never let the politicians and world leaders who willingly failed to fight for this to stop forget about it. i recently saw a video of people seeing justin trudeau out and about in a restaurant and they did not let him have a calm minute bc the palestinians don’t have it, they didn’t let him eat his meal bc palestinians are starving. and this is exactly the right way to do it. they got the guns we got the numbers and so many people have developed awareness and learned not only about the presence but also the history and this knowledge has to now be passed on from generation to generation.

[kojinnie]

The Impossible Request | Levi Ackerman

Based on the request by a lovely anon here. As always, I apologize for putting a little bit of angst into what was supposed to be a full-on fluff :(

levi ackerman x reader; fluff/angst; 2032 words

Captain Levi Ackerman left you with an impossible request during your last ride to the forest with him.

Throughout the whole journey Levi kept looking at you, throwing worried glances frequently at the strange way you rode your horse through the forest. A moment ago, you were about to ride yourself and your horse to a certain death offered by a cliff by the side of the trail. If it wasn’t for your horse’s trained instinct, you’d be a tragic story of a silly death by now.

Admittedly, your focus was not on the trail of the forest hill, nor was it on the hurdles of vines and fallen branches splayed all over your pathway. Levi had to keep screaming at you to keep you from bringing your horse to an accident. Your focus was somewhere else, a distant place that a soldier must not dwell within too long. The unfamiliarity of this place caught you off-guard and as evident by the harrowing way you ride the horse, it has come to ensnare you.

As the thickness of the forest started to dissipate to an open field that overlooked the castle where Survey Corps was stationed at, Levi abruptly changed his direction and stopped your way. Your horse squealed in shock and reared up in effect, almost throwing you to the ground.

The Captain immediately jumped off the horse and darted a piercing stare at you, “Get off. Now.” The way he commanded you sent a shiver down your spine, that tone – his battlefield sternness returned, something far different than the somewhat casual Levi that you have grown to be close with during your off-duty season in the castle with him and the Corps.

It was a scarce occurrence to hear him used that tone far from the warfare. You knew he was enraged. You whimpered almost inaudibly, trying to calm your own racing heartbeat as well as to calm your horse down by patting her cheek, before climbing off of her. The Captain immediately yanked your arms and brought you to the side, under the aid of a huge willow tree whose leaves were yellowing with the arrival of Autumn.

The anger was palpable on his pale face, “Are you—” he was immediately dismayed by the surprising hike in his own tone, something that was almost unprecedented of him. The captain knew that he couldn’t let his rage overcome him. He sighed out of annoyance as he came to maintain his composure, “Are you trying to kill yourself?”

“I’m sorry, Captain.”

“You were riding like you’ve got a stick up your ass.”

“I know. Sorry—I—”

“If you want to die, then just tell me. Hange can use you up for experiments.”

“Captain, I—”

There was a momentary silence looming over the two of you. Levi waited for your response but he scoffed and walked away to the edge of the hill when another second passed with your inability to bring any form of coherence in your words. Your heart sunk in disappointment.

Levi squatted and looked afar to the castle. You could see his torso heaved; it was obvious that he was trying to pace his breath from the suppressed anger. You couldn’t bring yourself to admit of what made you so distraught. The idea that a mere emotional disappointment had led you, a trained soldier, to almost kill yourself for not being able to ride your horse right, is of something preposterous. You were ashamed and girded by guilt. As a soldier, you had let emotion distraught your aptitude.

“Tell me or don’t tell me – whatever,” Levi finally broke the silence without looking at you. Your only view of him was his heaving back, “I already knew.”

You knew of it already, but his reiteration shriveled the last hope you had that the Deployment Letter you received this morning was still bound to change, “You can’t do anything to change it?”

“No. I’m a soldier, and it’s my duty to obey,” Levi spoke. You wished you could feel even the tiniest bit of an upset in his words, but there was little to none, “you have been asked for the Garrison. Effective tomorrow. You shall no longer be here when Eren Jaeger arrives. Erwin’s decision, signed by Commander Pyxis.”

It had been three years since you were assigned to the elite Levi Squad by his own choice. Within those years as well, you had seen yourself grown seasoned by the battles alongside your entrusted Captain, as you fought the mouth of deaths countless times together. Naturally, parting apart alive would be hard for you.

People of the Walls knew him as the humanity’s strongest soldier, would they gape in knowing that humanity’s hope needed to stay humane in order to be their beacon of strength? And that was your duty for him – keeping him humane. Even if it was just to learn his meticulous way of brewing his own tea, so when he was injured and bed-ridden, he would still be aided with the warmth of his favorite drink. Even if it was just helping him tying his cravat when his hand was occupied with paper works. Even if it’s just a sleepless night with him at the library as he learned the offense strategy for the upcoming expedition. You’d done all that with no words spoken of how fond you were of him. Even when your smile arose when he finally let you massaged his strained back, or when your fingers touched the bare skin on his back when you were tending his battle scars, you were adamant to let the feelings simmer in painful silence.

In keeping him humane, you must set aside what you want of him. Your childish imagination and desire to settle with him. After all, Levi was a man unbounded, and in certain liberty shall he thrive for humanity. So, you never spoke how much your heart fluttered when he rode in full-speed to save you from the monstrous titan holding you in their grasp. The way he stayed awake, sitting by your bedside all night after a near-death incident that left you barely conscious for a week. You had sworn to bring this truth to death, but you were conscious when, out of desperation, he ran his calloused fingers through the mess of your hair, stroking your temple soft with the coarseness of his fingers as he whispered in prayer, “Please stay alive, please stay alive…” and then Levi spoke of your name, calling out to what was left of you after a bloody expedition. He called for you, not in the stern command the Captain would utter in the battlefield, but with tenderness of a man bound by grievance.

Had you grown a space in your heart to love me? Was the question that hung in your throat when you finally gained consciousness after the injury, where Petra shrieked in relief and happiness, calling out for the others, and then she said, “Welcome back. We miss you terribly. The Captain has been gaunt without you.”

The question throbbed again with simple little things he did. When he shoved more mashed potato to your empty plate, “Eat more,” he would say with more of a grunt rather than a warm suggestion; The tender pat on the back when you successfully cleared your final task; The palpable look of agitation when you returned from an impromptu hunting trip with Eld in the forest that led him wary of your whereabout for two nights – in all those moments, you wished you had the courage to ask him the question: Had you grown a space in your heart to love me? Or were you just being a good leader to your comrades?

The sun was beginning to set on the horizon. The wind breezed through the forest, blowing the yellowed leaves off of its branches, drenching the two of you in the solemn noise of Autumn. Couple of hours ago, Levi had taken you to ride to the forest to collect firewood for supplies, but even then you knew that wasn’t what you rode here for. Levi sat on the dirty ground and sighed, “Come here.” He looked at you, and softly pat the ground by his side.

Levi knew that he assumed a great deal of obligation. He wasn’t daft, he’d grown aware of the murmurs that people left on his path, ‘Look, it’s the humanity’s strongest soldier – Captain Levi Ackerman!’ then when he wasn’t so well-guarded, he’d catch the way those children look up to him with earnest amazement. Those wondrous eyes. The innocence of faultless children is the thing he had sworn to protect when he braced another expedition beyond the wall, at the expense of everything that made him humane – delicacy, tenderness, warmth, and love. But then Levi met you, and since then he began to wonder: ‘What if? What if? What if?’

Levi knew the feeling he had grown to have for you was starting to cloud his judgment when he almost broke the formation to save you from the mouth of a titan. He remembered the awful feeling of riding back to the camp, with your bloodied form on his lap, to be greeted by the discerning look of disappointment from his own comrades. Later that night, as much as the expedition was a success with minimum casualty, Erwin sat him down and bludgeoned him with the fact that negated every virtue Levi had ever stood for, “You compromised the whole formation with your rash action.”

Compromised. Rash action.

The words that had brought Levi to a prolonged regret. Who he was with you, was not the person Levi devoted his heart for. Levi knew he needed to stop. His allegiance was to humanity, to Commander Erwin Smith – and not to you.

As you sat down by his side, he finally looked at you, and smiled. So scarce of the captain, but when he did, you could feel it was genuine.

“I am going to ask you a question,” Levi said, his grey eyes darkened underneath the warm dusk, “and you don’t have to answer it right now.”

You nodded obediently.

“Do you think all this will end? To live in constant fear of death, and,” there was a momentary pause in his sentence. Uncharacteristic of him, as if he was trying to fight his own fright that was starting to nestle deep in his mind, “have ourselves carrying the last bits of humanity’s hope?”

You remained silent as he carried on, “If no, then understand that your re-assignment is a necessity. For the greater good. But if yes, that you believe that this monstrosity will all end eventually, then, I hope…”

“Yes, Captain?”

Levi looked down at the soil where your hands and his were laying side by side. There was a somber smile beginning to rise from his face. He dragged his finger to tangle with yours rather cautiously. You greeted the awkward gesture with open heart, as you slithered your fingers into his grip.

“I hope, you will have the heart to welcome me home…”

“…to you.”

The words drowned you into a deafening silence, no matter that the Autumn breeze was starting to grow stronger as the sun succumbed into the night, no matter that your heart was thumping in all kinds of inexplicable agony – all you could hear was the void of nothingness, in which no matter how close you were to him, you could feel Levi drifting away from you.

Deep down, you knew that none of this walking nightmare they called life was ever going to end. You knew that each one of you was cursed to live the life in wretched reality. You always thought that he had known of it all along, out of so many people, you thought Levi would be the one to never look forward to a future of peace, for peace was an absurd concept as long as humanity was still trapped within the Walls.

And it broke your heart to gain understanding that Levi still had hopes for it. For the unattainable peace. With you.

He had believed in a future that you thought was impossible, and with it you realized that so would be your future with him.

As the sun finally slid to its resting peace, you brought your body closer to his embrace. He brought your face closer to him, he smiled before landing a kiss on your forehead. The genuine kind, of innocence that was so strange in the world of horrors. The kind of warmth he had longed for so many nights with the thought of you. And finally, you smiled at his words, “Yes, I will.” nodding at the impossible request.

[chiefbasementcreator]

Who is: Edwin Black, the Vampire King?

“Pathetic, you cannot even run a child’s errand”

Edwin Black is a demon, one of the most powerful (and in fact, one of the few demons who can claim a “royal” title, which only a handful of the most powerful demon can even attempt to claim, hence his title of Vampire King). He is the very first of vampires to exist, and the most powerful of them. None of the traditional vampire weaknesses apply to him, which is why one of his nickname is also “the Daywalker”.

Edwin’s chaarcter is something of an enigma, as he is cold and prgamtic to a fault, not showign anything to his opponents (out of universe, he’s used as the Big Evil Guy of the setting, so his characterization is somewhat light). He remain calm and collected in almost every circumstances, as there is very little that could ever be a threat to him.

He is the leader of the demoic/earthly crime syndicate Nomad, and he seeks dominion over all. He is also infatuated with Igawa Asagi, and one of his desires is to corrupt her and make her his slave, eventually to impregnate her. He has a god complex, wanting to remake the world with him as the “Adam” and Asagi as his “Eve”. While eh does not reciprocate Ingrid’s love for him, he does consider her an extremely valuable employee and ally, and will do his best to save her if he can.

His pragmatism means that he is cold and calculated, and will make alliances with other demons (or even the Taimanins if the situation calls for it) and will keep his word. 

He is no slouch in battle, and his presence/aura alone is enough to kill lesser demon without him needing to lift a finger. He is durable and strong enough that his relative lack of fighting skill is more than compensated by his sheer durability and strength. While a sorcerer above a physical fighter, if needed he will return to his true form to fight.

He is immortal, a magician, ageless and extremely strong.

(Author’s note: while this blog is focused on putting the Taimanin ladies in all sorts of lewd situations, Black is an important part to many characters’ stories, so i felt like making his profile was a necessity, if at least so that people other than my taimanin anon know who he is and can send ask/stuff about him. But he is a caharcter, so feel free to send him asks as well.)

[unstoppableforcce]

golden

CHAPTER ONE: simplicity

pairing: Poe Dameron x oc! Anya

next part | masterlist | oc art

a/n: this is set before the Force Awakens and is a rewrite and expansion of one of my first fics. it’s a big one, this part is 6.7k which might be the longest thing i’ve ever written lol, but i love my oc and the relationships and the plot of this, i hope yall do too bc i can’t wait to write more!!! 

He had forgotten how beautiful the galaxy could be. 

Before him, through the clear windshield of the dilapidated transport ship, laid an expanse of towering mountains of green, thick like the jungles of Yavin IV he knew so well, and vast like the breath of the galaxy he was only beginning to familiarize himself with. In the valleys that sat between the intimidating heights of the jungle were ponds and lakes, illuminated by the contrast of their soft pink hue and the sunlight from three suns beating down on them overhead. And within each jaw-dropping landscape they flew over, the lanky jungle trees stretched high and interwoven with each other and the depths of the gentle pink lakes, he caught glimpses of the hidden civilization. 

Stone buildings of dark brown granite hidden beneath the twisted green vines and thick, overgrown tree trunks, windows of reflective glass cascading like waterfalls built back into the shape of the mountains. From as high as they were, flying above in the shaky transport ship, he could make out the movement of the people through the trees and on wooden crescent boats out in the milky pink water of the lake, working as the suns bore down on their backs. 

Flying in his X-wing, he had mission objectives and responsibilities. He travelled from point A to point B and never lingered in one place for longer than he needed to, not with the First Order patrols cracking down across the galaxy. He couldn’t remember the last time he had travelled so slow, the last time he got to truly see the colors of the universe around him which normally passed in hyperspeed blurs. 

He had forgotten how beautiful the galaxy could be. 

“Wow…” the awe fell from his lips unconsciously as his eyes stayed wide, scanning the horizon not only out of necessity given their flight path, but because he couldn’t look anywhere else. The D’Qar jungle was said to be beautiful, as beautiful as this, but for the past months he had been tasked with growing their new base there, he saw the inside of buildings and the burn of haunting fluorescent lights more than he did the real greenery and sunlight. 

It was… breathtaking to say the least. 

“I thought I misremembered,” the calm and collected voice of the General sounded off over his shoulder as he slowed his speed to navigate a lofty bit of cloud cover that surrounded the tops of the mountainous valleys he navigated between. “I convinced myself somehow that no place in the galaxy could be as beautiful as I remembered but I was wrong.”

He couldn’t blame her. If he wasn’t seeing it with his own eyes as his hands gripped tight to the controls of the ship, he wasn’t sure he would have believed it either. 

Waterfalls of the lightest pink hue, the sparkling of the natural granite deposits in the rock which shined equally as bright as the city construction as they continued over it, the polished rock made into skyscrapers which rivaled the surrounding mountains in height, the natural overgrowth of green vines and thick canopy tree tops… the more he saw, the more Poe found himself overwhelmed by the beauty. 

“How far until the palace?” He hummed with a brief quirk of his jaw back over his shoulder to Leia as his eyes stayed trained on the intricate habitational design and fields woven between towering structures which shadowed over smaller homes which led to more fields and rivers, rocks and jungle. 

“Not far, it’s impossible to miss.”

It hadn’t made sense at that moment, but he refrained from asking her to expand, trusting that whatever she meant would be clear to him as they kept going. Within the following minute, his trust proved itself. 

The nose of the ship lifted slightly to get them over a particularly tall mountain top, and as the clouds cleared away while he nosed back into the valley below, he found the most gorgeous architectural and natural displays he had ever laid his eyes on. Built, like the hidden structures he had seen earlier, into the most commanding mountain of sparkling brown granite in the landscape before him, the palace was a delicate, yet proud masterpiece with spires as high as the clouds and a bustling marketplace pouring out the front of it, spilling towards the shore of the pink ocean before it. 

Banners of colors brighter than he even knew existed fluttered in the wind coming in off the coast throughout the marketplace, and as he brought the ship in to a stop at the surrounding rim of the mountain above the palace’s top spires where all the other ships sat, he began to notice the vibrant crowd which flowed from the boats in the water all the way through the palace gates. He loved his home with all his heart, but this was the most beautiful place in the galaxy. It had to be. 

He and Leia quickly unloaded from the non-descript ship, and Poe made sure to leave his blaster secure in the cockpit as Leia had instructed him earlier, taking only his jacket and communicator with him. A jacket he quickly realized he would not be needing as the two of them stepped out amongst the ships atop the mountain and felt the overwhelming heat from the suns above them. 

“Don’t be too in awe, we are here for a reason.” He glanced back from where he stood near the edge of the flattened mountain top to see Leia stood as regal as ever with her hands linked behind her back and her stare that of a careful mother. “An important reason,” she minded once more and he had no choice but to nod. 

As he reluctantly pulled away from teh edge and joined her at her side while they drew closer to the nearby lift and the mindlessly chatting guards stood around it, he couldn’t help but voice the one thought he couldn’t get out of his mind,“I can’t imagine a place like this ever allying with the First Order.” 

With a voice lowered closer to that of a whisper while they passed the guards, Leia carefully minded him again, “There is a complicated history to Haiki, as beautiful as it is.”

“All the briefing memo said was that they were great allies during the war, pacifists, but great allies.” He responded in an equally hushed tone until the doors to their lift shut and they began descending deep into the dark, sparkling rock. “You said their leader was a friend.”

“Their King and Queen were friends of mine while I was still living on Alderaan and fighting with the rebellion, unfortunately the queen died shortly after the Empire fell and their king has been sick for almost as long.” She explained as the thick walls of granite passed quickly by them as they continued to descend. 

“Who are we here to meet with then?”

The lift came to a stop at the bottom and the doors opened to a dense crowd of people, all dressed in vibrant colors of thick woven fabric, skin decorated with thick strokes of black ink in intricate designs that varied from body to body. But as much as Poe wished to step forward and immerse himself into the lively crowd of the market, Leia’s firm grip on the elbow of his jacket pulled him in the opposite direction, towards an open doorway outlined by beautiful branches and bright flowers as her words quickly pulled him back to the reality of their mission there. 

“We’re meeting with the Princess,” Leia answered as they continued down the hall illuminated by windows which brought cascades of bright light into the halls as they travelled in a direction which seemed to Poe as if it were going deeper into the rock of the mountain. “I’ve met her before, but she was young, now she runs the whole planet and, from what I can tell, is not as eager about our alliance as her parents were.”

“You think she’s fielding threats from the First Order? You said they were pacifists--”

“It’s not about weapons or defense, it’s about supplies.” Leia sighed as the two of them came to a halt in the middle of the hallway, allowing the few locals who were walking behind them to pass in front and leave them alone with the bright sunlight. “We need their support, the medicine they create, the food they grow… If we don’t get it, I don’t know how much longer we can survive.”

Poe nodded, his overgrown curls bouncing with the nod of his head as he glanced around the empty hall and began pulling his jacket off his already sweat-slicked back. 

He knew they were there for support, but the briefing memo had been vague on purpose. No one else could know they were there, no one could know why they were there. If there was a leak, if the First Order somehow found out that the Resistance was reliant on Hakian support to survive, they’d decimate the entire planet, strip mine them for their resources and slaughter their peaceful population. 

He trusted their people, and he knew Leia did too, but he also understood why he had to be kept in the dark until now. This was just too important. 

“When we get in to see her, you’ll call her only ‘princess’ or ‘dekka’, never by her first name unless she gives you permission. And make sure you keep your distance, be respectful,” Leia warned as they slowly began walking again, turning a corner and entering another well-lit hall still travelling deeper into the mountain it seemed. “They are sticklers for tradition here and we can’t afford to play around.”

“What does ‘dekka’ mean?” 

“Respected one.” She answered quickly, keeping her voice close to him as another person came into view at the end of the hall. 

The man towered just like the mountains they flew through did, taller than any human man Poe had seen in person, nearly wookie height if he was being honest. But there was nothing intimidating about him, he merely flashed a bright smile and opened his arms in a welcoming stance. 

“Princess Leia, it is an honor to see you again.” The man bellowed out, meeting them at the end of the hall where it let out into a gorgeous room of tall ceilings and windows that stretched from the polished granite floor all the way up to the tallest rafters of twisted vine and tree root, letting in an electric amount of natural light. 

Leia quickly unlinked her hands from behind her back and wrapped them around the man, who stood at nearly twice her height, in a solid embrace. “Elias, it’s an honor to see you as well.”

“I had no idea you were coming, whatever can I help you with?” His thick accent continued to cut through the air, louder than Leia could muster by several dozen decibels. His command over the basic language wasn’t too strong, but he certainly made up for his shortcomings with heart and confidence.

However, no amount of strength of heart could overwrite the confusion outlined by his words, leaving an unsettling feeling in Poe’s gut. Judging by the slight deflation in Leia’s commanding stance, it was clear he wasn’t the only one. 

“No idea…” Leia chuckled nervously, trailing off with a brief shake of her braids. “We were meant to meet with Dekka Anya-Va, is she not here?”

Elias’ chuckle was equally as unsettled, something was wrong. 

“She hasn’t been in all day,” he added as another rough chuckle escaped his lips, “I didn’t know she had schedule, she didn’t tell me…”

Seven hours. That’s how far away Haiki was from D’Qar when travelling as fast as possible in the only non-resistance ship available, an old, deteriorating transport ship. He spent seven hours behind the controls on a trembling, shaking ship, and the Princess they were supposed to be meeting with to secure necessary supplies for the resistance was not there? Was this some kind of joke?

If it was, he didn’t find it very funny. 

Leia glanced back over her shoulder, finding the waiting confusion that covered Poe’s face and turned back to Elias wearing a very similar look. “She hasn’t been in at all?”

“She’s been… cutting me off, isolating herself from her advisors… I don’t know…” He stuttered over each and every word, clearly pulling them from a particularly painful place in his chest. 

And on any other day, Poe might have cared about the way the towering man’s intimidating voice trembled in his explanation. The overwhelmingly empathetic heart that beat steadily in his chest was accustomed to feeling for anyone from anywhere across the galaxy, but in this moment, the weight of the resistance was too apparent on his shoulders. 

If Leia said they needed this Princess to save the resistance, then that was that. They needed this Princess, and hearing that she was circumventing her advisors as much as she was avoiding their meeting only increased the nerves in his unsettled stomach. 

“You are welcome to wait for her in the throne room, I will send her your way whenever I find her…” Elias made a desperate attempt to relight the smile that had fallen from Leia’s diplomatic lips, but it only succeeded somewhat, as much as Leia could muster, feeling the same weight that Poe felt sitting heavy on her shoulders. 

“Thank you, Elias.” Leia bowed her head, and Elias quickly did the same. 

But the second Leia turned away from him and began nudging Poe back in the direction they came from, her diplomatic disposition fell away, returning her harsh, commanding stare. 

“She’s avoiding us?” Poe was quick to question as their pace hastened back down the brightly illuminated halls leading back to the busy marketplace. 

Leia shook her head, keeping her voice low as the two of them walked, shoulder to shoulder. “Remember when you asked if I thought she was fielding First Order threats already? I think we just got our answer.”

“What do we do?”

As the two of them entered back out into the dense crowd of the marketplace, Leia gave a brief shrug, still tugging him along with her as she fought against the flow of tattooed people. “Now, we have to find her.”

“Do you know where to look?”

The stare Leia gave him was one he was all too familiar with. It was the same look he got when he asked questions about procedure he already knew the answer to, the same look he got when he asked questions he knew she wouldn’t answer. It was a look that meant one thing. The simplest answer, the easier answer, the obvious one that was punching him directly in the face, was the answer he should be looking for. 

And with Leia, when it came to asking if she knew anything, the answer was without a doubt, a resounding ‘yes’. 

Following the banners, each one a color more vibrant than the last, Leia continued to push him through the marketplace. As they exited the front gate of the palace, the market grew impossibly larger and the crowd more dense, every soul moving with a specific purpose, from stall to stall with shoulders carrying heavy bags and faces bright with electric smiles. 

Poe couldn’t remember the last time he saw so many smiles in such a densely packed region.

The sun was beating down hot on his back, slicking his curls to his forehead in a light coating of sweat, but everyone around him seemed oblivious to it, either too distracted by the spices piled high in the booths, wafting a plethora of new scents around the beautiful square, or the swaths of fabrics covered in intricate stitches and designs. Was this what life was like where the war didn’t touch? 

People could walk around, fully immersed in their own vibrant culture wearing smiles brighter than the multiple suns which hung above them, seemingly without a care in the world when it came to the slaughtering and genocide happening around the galaxy at the hands of the First Order? Did they even know? 

Did the parents who let their kids run around with tightly woven baskets piled high with spiky blue fruit even know about the children across the galaxy who were stolen from their families and conscripted as nameless troopers? Did the elderly who sat off to the side even know that just last week, a village of respected elders on Nantoo were mowed down indiscriminately by First Order officers looking to set up base on their sacred land? Did any of them even know about the war?

If he lived here, maybe he could understand it. Maybe… 

But Stars, was ignorance really bliss when millions were being slaughtered? 

“I knew she’d be here…” Leia sighed, pulling Poe’s attention back to her pursuit as the market began to thin out closer to the pink translucent shore packed with crescent shaped boats of dark wood unloading at the docks. He didn’t know where to let his stare fall however, the water immediately took his attention, but as Leia kept walking, he fought to both find her stare and follow it in the same direction. 

The shore wasn’t packed, but there were just enough bodies to keep him guessing even as he followed Leia’s focus. Where was she looking--

He found her.

Nothing had changed, he still didn’t know exactly where Leia’s stare was directed nor did he have any verbal confirmation that he was looking in the right direction, but he was sure of himself, overwhelmingly sure of himself as his stare landed on the detailed tattoos that covered the back of the lone woman sat on the damp shore, isolated from the crowd. 

The thin interwoven fabric of the maroon dress that cascaded down her form was exquisite in it’s intricately stitched details, but nothing compared to the thick, jet black ink stripes that crested over her back and arms, the extent of the skin he could see from the angle they were approaching with. Everyone he had seen so far on this planet had some form of similar markings, be it extensive designs sprawling up their arms or small delicate images drawn on their hands or necks, but none compared to what he saw on her skin. 

It was like the dark ink was woven around her, like a vine crawling it’s way up a tree. Or maybe more aptly, it was a web, drawn by a diligent insect or maybe even claw marks from a creature, thick where the wounds ran the deepest and thin at the start and ends of each mark. 

Haiku itself was one of the most beautiful planets in the galaxy, but the woman before him was more beautiful than even that. 

It took an elbow in the side from Leia to snap him back to reality. 

“Why don’t you let me do most of the talking, yeah?” She countered, a knowing quirk to her brow as she nudged him again with her elbow. 

He wanted to argue back but Leia had already begun walking ahead of him and the second he moved to catch up, a large guard stepped up to block their path. 

This man was tall, like Elias back in the palace was, but he didn’t wear his intimidating height the same way. He was much broader in the shoulders, much wider in his stance, effectively blocking any line of sight either Poe or Leia had towards the princess. Yet unlike Elias, there was no friendly greeting, no real acknowledgement at all besides his narrowed scowl down towards the two of them. 

For a planet of self-proclaimed pacifists, Poe wasn’t really feeling at peace. 

Not until the soft hum of her voice flowed in from the gentle lull of the shore. “It’s alright, Xia, let them through.”

The wall of a man quickly stepped aside on her orders, revealing the exhausted collapse of her shoulders while she began to pull herself back up to her feet. The languid pull of her muscles was obvious with the delicate cut of the maroon dress across her skin, which contrasted the blood color of the fabric with a dark brown glow, not unlike the sparkle of the magnificent granite mountains under the overhead suns. 

“Dekka Anya-Va…” Leia addressed carefully but was quickly cut off by the return of her coarse hum of a voice. 

“I was hoping by not being at the palace that you would get the impression I didn’t want to meet with you,” her accent was thick, much like Elias’s but her comfort with the language was much more evident as it flowed much smoother from her lips despite the natural raspiness to her tone. It was a mesmerizing sound, complemented by the dulcet tone of the gentle waves, making it something he could easily get lost in if it wasn’t for his ability to still hear the words for what they were. 

Condescending. Nearly mocking if he was being honest. It just didn’t sit well with him, not when directed towards Leia. 

“We got the impression, we just ignored it,” Leia countered, pushing her careful tone to the side in favor of the tone she used when addressing her Commanders, a tone that commanded respect, even if the Princess seemed too aloof to provide it. 

She let out a rugged chuckle at that, jagged at the edges where it seemed to have fought through her throat and out from her perfectly shaped lips. “We…” she hummed, “I wasn’t aware you were bringing friends.”

The pointed tips of her words were sent like daggers with her stare as she turned from Leia to where Poe stood right beside her, hands linked behind his back and still holding his jacket in a tight grip. But as personal an assault it seemed, when he opened his lips to respond, Leia was quick to cut him off. 

“I--”

“This is my pilot, Commander Dameron.”

As unamused as the princess seemed to be, she still did a lot of stone-faced laughter, and that theme held true as her stare held on Poe’s furrowed and focused face. “Does the Commander have a first name?”

With a quick glance to Leia, then back to the Princess, he finally spoke for himself, answering “Poe,” simply. 

He didn’t know what he thought throwing his name into the conversation would add, but he couldn’t determine any reason why not to add it, not until the Princess turned her stare back to Leia and shuddered her shoulders back into a steady stance with her chin raised. “Would you mind telling Poe he can go wait by your ship, I don’t imagine it will be a long conversation.”

There it was again. Aloof, condescending, mocking even. Poe couldn’t stand it. 

“Excuse me--”

“Actually, Dekka Va, I brought him so he could join our talks,” Leia explained, one of her hands shooting up quickly to keep him in place by her side as she felt the heat of his temper rise with her words. 

“He doesn’t seem like he’d be much for conversation.”

He realized his natural disposition may not have been the most diplomatic, he also realized that hot-headed and cocky weren’t necessarily the best qualities for negotiating delicate alliances, but if she was allowed to talk to him with the tone she was taking, he was having a hard time understanding why Leia was keeping him silent. Why even bring him along?

It was infuriating. She was infuriating. She wouldn’t meet them in the palace, she was hiding on the beach, she was biting back with each and every one of her responses. He understood the alliance between her planet and the resistance was important, he really did, but why in the kriff was he even there--

“Dekka Anya-Va, I assure you, Poe is one of my most trusted Commanders and when our discussion eventually turns to shipment methods, he is the only one I trust for routes and numbers--” Leia began, still holding her hand out carefully in front of Poe only to drop it the second the Princess shrugged her shoulders and cut her off the same way she had been cutting Poe off. 

“There will be no shipment discussions.”

“Dekka--”

“I apologize for avoiding the meeting, but it wasn’t accidental, I truly have no interest in meeting with you, General.” She continued, using the brief second they stood silent and frozen in shock to navigate around them and back towards the market. 

Leia was the first to break out of it, Poe trailing behind, but he still remained quiet, holding back his boiling temper as the General continued to argue. 

“It’s a rather important conversation that we need to have.”

The princess continued forward as if she barely noticed them following, and as the density of the market's population began to increase the closer they moved to the palace, she made no move to slow her careful and practiced step through the crowd to accommodate their trailing. Again, condescending and aloof.

Leia broke his train of thought again as she fought with a quickened pace to find her way to her side and continue her argument just within range of Poe’s ears. “A face-to-face meeting will allow us to discuss our deal more intimately, take away any fears you may have and--”

If she cut Leia off one more time, it wouldn’t matter that she was the most respected being on this planet, Poe wasn’t going to be able to keep quiet for much longer. 

“I’m not afraid of anything, General.”

Before either Leia or Poe, with his temper steadily boiling over, could mount another argument, the princess pulled one of her guards aside, retrieving a small pouch of golden coins from him and turning back to the stall that had caught her eye in the first place. It was the stall they had passed earlier, filled with children and the spiky blue fruits which had caught his eye as he thought about the rest of the galaxy. 

And it was exactly where the princess was kneeling down. 

Her rough tone of voice, coated in it’s natural raspiness, flowed out much easier in her native tongue as she let a genuine smile take over her lips. The kids running the booth were bouncing out of their boots as she lowered herself to their level, and their excitement only grew as they began talking to one another in the Hakian language. It would have been heartwarming if Poe weren’t so frustrated. 

He didn’t understand what they were saying and it was clear as he glanced toward Leia and saw her focused brow that she didn’t understand the words being spoken either, but from the shared interactions, he had a pretty decent idea what was transpiring. 

She asked a question, the kids nervously responded, shaking their heads and trying to offer their product for free before she convinced them to accept her coin. Again, a heartwarming display that he didn’t have time for. 

The sun was hot, boiling hot down the back of his neck, and the anger bubbling from within his chest was heating him up from the inside out, making the whole experience ten times worse. He didn’t need to see any heartwarming display, he needed to say something, and he was becoming increasingly overwhelmed with the feeling that when he did, things wouldn’t go well. 

Yet the moment seemed to be drawing closer and closer as the Princess stood back to full height with a bag full of the spiky fruit, passing her coins back to her guard. He was ready to open his mouth, to unload on her with the same hot-headed cockiness that Leia feared he would lead with, but he was again denied the chance as she silenced him by turning her back to the two of them and reentering the crowd, heading back towards the palace. 

It wasn’t until they were down an isolated hallway of the palace that she turned back, opening the bag of fruit and pulling three of the spiked fruit out easily. 

“Dekka--” Leia tried, but the princess silenced her, sticking one of the fruits into her hand before carelessly tossing one in Poe’s direction. 

She was making a point, and they had no choice but to stand there and take it. 

“This is Mewe, one of our planet’s sweetest fruits,” she hummed, holding up one of her own and turning it gently for them to admire even if all Poe could manage was a subtle roll of his eyes. “They cannot grow anywhere else, they require massive amounts of sunlight, and they are one of the most versatile fruits that exist anywhere in the galaxy, edible on their own, full of health, easily fermented, their juice can soothe sore throats and upset stomachs...”

Puncturing the tough, spiky skin with one of her nails, the vibrant teal juices began to drain quickly out of the shell, too quick for even her quick mouth to catch as she brought the fruit to her lips. The following bite she took was effortless following her brief struggle with the dripping juices, and as much as Poe hated whatever point she was trying to make with this display, as Leia followed her lead and took a bite, he had no choice but to do the same. 

And as desperate as he was to stay boiling with anger when he looked at her, even with teal juices dripping down around the corner of her mouth, his mind was flooded with a delicious distraction the second his tongue touched the inner meat of the vibrant fruit. It wasn’t enough for Haiki to be the most beautiful planet in the galaxy, nor was it enough for her to be the most beautiful woman he had ever seen in person, they also needed to have the most overwhelming natural fruits. 

Each hesitant chew he took sparked flavors across his tongue, wild, exotic, unlike anything he had ever tasted before. It wasn’t just that his diet had consisted of bland ration packs for the past few years, the taste was truly sweeter and more complex than anything he had ever had on his tongue. 

As much as he hated giving her the satisfaction, while he looked up from the greenish inside of the skin to find her careful stare, he could see that he was doing little to hide his overwhelming satisfaction with the flavor given her increasingly smug smirk. 

“Haiki is a special place, I don’t think you realize that.” The Princess continued carefully, shifting her stare back to Leia directly. 

“We do, Dekka, however--”

“I don’t think you do.” She was quick to counter. “You would have me pledge my sponsorship to your futile movement and sacrifice my planet and the millions of souls who live here to the wrath of the First Order with nothing to offer me in return. You must think my planet worthless.”

Leia shook her head, taking a brief second to swallow the rest of the fruit she held in her mouth and regain her composure in order to fight back, “We can offer your planet protection from the First Order--”

“Because that worked so well for Alderaan, Raysho, Cardota and Courtsilius?” Again, the princess, without hesitation, cut her off. And this time, Poe was done holding his tongue, the heat finally sending his anger boiling over. 

“And pledging your allegiance to a sociopathic regime of murderers is preferable?”

It was exactly what Leia had feared. It was the exact reason she had tried so hard to keep him quiet. Not because she feared he would shoot and miss, but because of his tone. 

Each word drenched in a level of disrespect he hadn’t earned with her, stepping over a line he didn’t even realize, but one Leia couldn’t help him back from, even as she reached up to grab hold of him to prevent his anger from carrying him closer to the Princess and making things worse. 

“I’ll do whatever it takes to protect my planet.” She held her stance even as Poe stepped up, making no move but the slight uptick of her chin as he got closer. “As a peaceful planet, we have no options to arm ourselves outside of diplomacy and the First Order is being far more convincing.”

“Whatever they’ve said is lies, you can’t seriously consider trusting them.” He spoke like a man with no knowledge of his actions, entirely oblivious to the way her guard tightened their stances the closer he got, too blinded by his anger as she continued to argue back against him. 

“Because the resistance has never lied to us? Because you can be trusted implicitly on your word?”

With another step forward, eliminating any space between the two of them, Poe effectively cut Leia and her futile attempts to get him to back down out of the conversation. “What have they promised you? Safety? Isolation from the war? It’s only a matter of time before they are enslaving your people and stealing your resources--”

“They’ve promised me protection and have been nothing but cordial, unlike you and your failing resistance.” She scoffed, shaking her small bun of greying hair enough to let loose a few strands as she refused to back down. “So you’d do best to mind yourself before you overstep a boundary you can’t walk back from.”

There was a sense of finality to her tone as she ended her sentence, one Leia picked up on immediately, but even as she moved to grab more forcefully at Poe’s arm to pull him back to reality, he continued to fight his way out of it. Hot-headed, stubborn, cocky. She should have known better than to bring him along. She should have known things would go the way they were going. 

“You want me to play nice? People are dying.” 

Everything that happened next happened all too fast. The words came spewing from Poe’s lips and as the Princess turned away, no longer requiring herself to be subject to his cruel intonation, he reached out and grabbed her arm before he could be stopped. 

In the back of his mind, he could still hear the echoing warning Leia had provided him, telling him to keep his distance and speak with nothing but respect, but the flashes of war echoing in his head and the fire burning in his chest were crackling too loud for anything else to matter. A part of him knew it was out of line, that same part of him was begging for him to stop, and yet his hand still found the smooth, tattooed skin of her forearm, holding her in place as she moved to turn away in frustration. 

Leia took a strong hold on the sweat-soaked back of his shirt and yanked him back, but the damage had already been done. “Stand down, Dameron,” she tried out but by the time he released her arm, the guards had already descended upon him, gripping him by each arm and kicking the backs of his legs in to drop him to his knees. 

“I think the damage has been done, General.” Her voice was firm in her resolve and equally firm as her language switched and her tongue released a flurry of orders towards the guards who held the stubborn, fighting Dameron on his knees. 

“What the kriff-- I barely touched her--” He fought as their grips grew tighter, forcing him frozen where they held him. 

Leia tried again, this time not to hold Poe back but to carefully convince the princess, “Dekka Anya-Va, please…”

But her mind was made up and nothing either of them could do would change that. 

“We’ll let him think himself over with a sleep in our cells,” she explained to Leia as her stare then fell back to the squirming form of the curly haired and now defenseless pilot. “You can leave with him in the morning.”

“Are you out of your mind?”

“No, but it seems you might be.” The rough, raspiness to her tone which had been so distracting as it filtered out her accent shifted to something nearly playful, as if the whole display before her was amusing. He was being restrained by a towering guard of thick muscle on each side and she had the audacity to chuckle so plainly in his face, only making him fight more even if he knew it was futile. 

Leia stepped forward carefully towards the princess but before she could muster any last defense, the princess gave a wave of her hand and the guards, with shoulders wide in intimidating bulk, heaved the fighting pilot to his feet and began backing him up, dragging him in the opposite direction. 

“Dekka Anya-Va, let me apologize for his actions--”

“Mensha?” Her raspy voice interrupted the General before any real defense could leave her lips, ushering a young maid out from the small crowd which gathered around the display. “Please escort the General to a room where she can wait, give her anything she needs.”

“Dekka Anya-Va--”

“I’m not my mother, General, the sooner you learn that, the better for all of us involved.”

The long walk back into the depths of the granite palace was all too lonely as the Princess dismissed each and every member of her staff which approached her, even waving away the genuine concern on Elias’ brow and leaving him in the halls as she continued to the throne room. Her back was screaming out from the straight form she maintained with each and every step, but she held her stance and walked on, shoulders firm and chin up, just as she was taught. If anyone passed her, they had to see her as what she was, their leader. 

And leaders didn’t waver, no matter how strong the vacuum of emptiness swirling within their chest was, not when there were eyes to see. 

But the second the towering doors of intricate dark oak shut behind her, leaving her alone in the expansive and empty throne room, her shoulders fell in, collapsing her perfect form as her chin fell to her chest. The weight which settled there was too great, and the hollow gorge that tore through her heart was too powerful. 

Did he really think it was that easy?

Her throat burned with the heat rising out of her chest and her legs grew weaker with each step until she collapsed back against the exquisite throne of dark, sparkling granite consumed by overgrown vines, the words from the hot-headed pilot echoing through her mind, latching onto every thought. 

Did he think it was all that simple? Did he think she saw the blood on the hands of the First Order and so easily ignored it? Did he think it was that easy?

A sociopathic, murderous regime… did he really think she didn’t realize what they were? 

The bubbling in her gut continued on as her thoughts swarmed with a buzzing around her mind and her head fell forward into her hands where her elbows rested on her knees. Her fingers made furious circles of her temples but it made no difference, his words were there, haunting her mind and inescapable. 

Did they really think she didn’t know right from wrong? 

With the responsibility for millions of souls resting heavy on her back, the fate of her kind in her hands, it just wasn’t as easy as good versus bad. No matter how badly she wished it was. 

“Dekka Anya-Va,” the faint voice of one of her staffed maids entered her thoughts as the small woman carefully tiptoed into the room. “The prisoner is… angrily shouting for a meeting with you.”

Her back straightened on instinct, sending a shooting pain up her spine with the quick pace of the change. A pain she could barely mask with her regal tone as turned her stare towards the young woman, “we’ll leave him to calm himself down for now.”

“Of course, Dekka.”

As the door shut again, leaving her alone with her thoughts again, a sigh of insurmountable exhaustion fell from her lips and she collapsed back into the uncomfortable shape of stone. 

If only things could be that simple...

tags: (open)

@cammisanders @rogueonestan @blacksquadron-rougetwo @videogamesandpoorlifechoices @trust-dreamcatcher @mistermiraclee @witchyavenger @randomness501​ @buckstaposition​

[summonerscenarios]

What about the Missionaries, Tycoons, Outlaws, and Crafters reacting to finding MC passed out on the ground in front of their guild. When MC wakes up they just nonchalantly say that they accidentally fell asleep there.

Okay so I’m a bit self concious about how this one turned outasdfghjkl

I tried to include as many guild members as I could but there’s a whole lot of them + it’s just about midnight here lol. Hope you like it hun~!

-------

Missionaries

Your body is initially discovered by a collection of angel transients doing their routine rounds around the Aoyama guilds perimeter, having found you slouched right outside the gate and seemingly unconscious. It doesn’t take long for them to recognize you - the uniform itself is a dead giveaway, and the group soon splits into two, with one working to wake you whilst the others swiftly make their way inside the church to alert the acting guildmaster. 

Maria’s the one who hears of the news first, and with the only current news being that you’re unresponsive and collapsed right outside of the guild’s entrance she is understandably concerned beyond measure - there was no idea of how long you had been there for, and lord forbid something serious had caused you to fall right there it meant that all manners of things could be wrong by the time they were able to wake you. 

Fortunately the angels that had been left to wake you up had eventually decided that bringing you inside the church grounds was the best option, and by the time they arrived with you the other main guild members have gathered to see what’s going on. 

Needless to say by the time you wake up you’re just as confused as everyone else for an entirely different reason. It takes a moment for your brain to catch up with the fact that you’re no longer at the entrance and instead inside, but you don’t get the chance to ask what happened before you’re just about knocked over by Gabriel asking if you were okay and that everyone was so worried. Of course Zabaniyya follows right after, dipping in between the intervals where the angelic idol isn’t fussing over you to check on your condition and make sure that you’re fine. They don’t seem to think about asking you what happened until Maria’s able to get a word in and ask what you were doing outside the entrance to the guild.

“Oooooh, yeah I fell asleep! Heh, sorry about!”

The moment it clicks the reaction is instant. There’s a collective sigh of relief around the room, quickly broken by a collective “WHAT?!” 

Arsalan throws his head back laughing at the absurdity of it all, Gabriel (still clutching to you) nearly drags you off of the pew with a yell of absolute shock and Zabaniyya is rubbing his temples trying to calm his heart down from his previous fretting. For a moment you’re pretty sure Maria is going through the five stages of grief all at once realizing what’s happened before shaking his head with a smile and a sigh; and on top of it all Azazel is just watching this all go down from the sidelines chuckling seeing it all unfold.

Maria sits down with you after things have settled and lets you know that perhaps the next time you’re exhausted it would be better for you to simply ask for a place to sleep - you’re a trusted friend to the guild and to her so of course they’d be able to set you up with somewhere safer (and at least more comfortable than the floor) for you to get some rest. Whether or not you actually take them up on the offer next time you’re sleepy is up to you but it would definitely give their poor hearts a rest.

Tycoons

The Roppongi guild is almost always bustling, be it by its members or by security detail you’d be lucky to even manage to fall asleep without someone finding you and startling you awake. So the fact that you even manage to nod off and take a nap without being seen is a pretty significant feat, but by the time you are found it most definitely stirs up a commotion. Xolotl was the one who came across you, finding you resting against the wall of the Roppongi guild HQ with your face buried in your arms and honestly the moment he sees you he freaks out. Surely something’s wrong! You’re passed out right in the open completely alone, without even your weapon drawn! Anything could have happened!!!

Xolotl is so frazzled that he doesn’t even think about scooping you up into his arms and racing right back into the building looking for help to figure out what’s wrong with you. Fortunately he runs right into Melusine as he comes in (otherwise he would have ran paces through the whole tower just to find somebody) and she’s swift to take matters into her own hands once she spots you curled up in the transient’s arms. 

Melusine’s a lot more level-headed about the situation and takes her time to look you over before she sees that there’s no external injuries - no marks or bruises that could indicate that you had been hurt significantly enough to pass out. And that’s when Melusine notices the slow rise and fall of your chest, the relaxed expression on your face and, once Xolotl’s calmed down enough, the soft, steady breathing that clearly signals that you’re asleep. 

The panic dies down as swiftly as it rises with more questions than answers, however the commotion it caused doesn’t go unnoticed by the other tycoons. Having just dispersed from a meeting with the guild heads the shouting quickly gains their attention and Hakumen’s the first to storm out to see what all the damn fuss is about upon recognizing her bodyguards voice. As soon as Hakumen sees you though that anger quickly dissipates and she all but charges over with a noise of surprise.(and can I say that if that woman can fight as well as she does in those heels she can definitely sprint in them too) 

It doesn’t take long for the rest of the tycoon heads to follow suit, all they had to hear was that their spouse/lord/friend was in the building and the lot of them are quick to swarm Xolotl to get a look at you - even Tsath peeks out to see what’s going on, having been unwillingly dragged into the meeting as well by necessity. Melusine fills Licht in on the situation whilst Hakumen’s fawning over your peaceful expression, and Lucifage and Ophion are trying to coax/non too subtly order Xolotl to take you out of his arms. 

And it is amongst this chaos that you finally wake up, a bit disoriented and confused on why you’re suddenly surrounded by guild leaders and cradled in Xolotl’s arms. You were comfortable enough that you probably could have fallen right back to sleep if they hadn’t noticed you open your eyes and suddenly there’s several voices vying for your attention one way or another.

It’s impossible to get a word in edgewise until you just give up all together and bury your face back into Xolotl’s chest, grumbling about just wanting a place to take a nap and clicking the final puzzle between your sudden appearance into place. Things calm down significantly at that point, however you immediately get numerous offers for somewhere to rest (though pick carefully because two of those offers means absolutely no sleeping unless you’re firm about the napping). On the bright side you can be sure that if you take any of them up on a place to rest your head it’ll definitely be the most luxurious experience out of the other guilds - they’ll spare no expense no matter how sudden this all is.

Outlaws

Okay falling asleep right outside of the Outlaws’ borders is probably the stupidest thing to do especially without giving them a heads up that you’ll at least be in the area beforehand. It’s not necessarily any less dangerous than the other guild’s locations but it would definitely take some guts to just fall asleep right there. Fortunately you’ve been over enough times that the Outlaw’s members know to keep an eye out for you and know who you are so things are pretty chill. On the bright side there’s plenty of places to sleep where you’ll be uninterrupted unless you’re unlucky, and this time was that time.

Tetsuox gets word during his patrol on the north side of Kabukicho that you’d been spotted a little while ago and of course he’s excited to know that you’re close by - you guys have got plenty to catch up on so he’s pumped to see you! That is until he gets there and finds that you’re laying on the floor, surrounded by a couple of members who had already spotted you and got concerned enough to check and see what was up. 

Seeing you passed out, Tetsuox thinks the worst - how can he not?! Even once he gets closer and sees that there’s not anything necessarily wrong with you there’s always the possibility right? I mean not that his boss would go down that easily but still! Since Kabukicho’s always keen on keeping an eye on the comings and goings of visitors it doesn’t take long for some of the other members to come filtering over, with Suzuka and Tetsuya coming into the picture, and by this point Tetsuox is actively trying to get at least some response out of you before they can step in.

The poor guy’s so busy worrying over you that it doesn’t even register that you’re totally fine. Suzuka leans down to get a better look at you over Tetsuox’s shoulder, taking a moment to scrutinize you for any kind of problem before opening her mouth to speak-

Only for your snore to break through mid-conversation as you roll over to get into a more comfortable position.

That just about breaks whatever tension was there in the first place. Tetsuox is immediately relieved, laughing it off now that he knows everything’s good. Suzuka is frustrated that you have the guts to just fall asleep like that and refuse to wake up, hallways contemplating giving you a boot in the side to wake you up. And Tetsuya is torn between impressed that the commotion hasn’t woken you and kinda annoyed this whole thing is going on, but he takes the initiative to squat down to your height and work on getting you to wake up, with a flick to the forehead enough to finally rouse you. 

Your chill response to waking up to being surrounded definitely gets you an earful from Suzuka about your recklessness and stupidity - there’s plenty of better places to sleep! There’s benches, ledges, even parks that are there if you need to sleep but the floor? Right outside of the guilds territory?! If you really needed somewhere to crash a heads up could have saved a hell of a lot of trouble - they aren’t cruel enough to turn you away if you needed it, but they make sure to get you to swear not to pull this off again just to catch up on some damn sleep.

Crafters

Musashi’s actually the one who spots you first, arms behind your head and looking towards the sky switching from watching the clouds and trying to nod off. He approaches you right as you’re about to catch up on some sleep and jokes that there’s better places to lie than on the ground, even pointing out a couple of shaded spots or grass and trees near the guild’s entrance, though it’s clear that you’re not gonna make a move to budge when you don’t even open your eyes.

Once you make it clear that you’re just gonna close your eyes for a little bit and that you’ll be fine where you are he just shrugs it off - whatever floats your boat! And hey who’s he to judge where you want to nap? You’ve already nodded off by the time that he makes his way back to the workshop, passing by Kurogane taking a break from his work in the process. It’s easy enough for the Crafters to get distracted by their work so honestly you would be able to rest there for a little bit undisturbed before Kurogane spots you on the ground. He doesn’t recognize it’s you at first since there’s a bit of distance between the workshop and the entrance, but since you’re lying down in the direction Musashi had just come from he calls out to him to ask what’s on the floor by the entrance.

Not thinking much of the question Musashi simply shrugs, commenting on how you’d been there a while and must have passed out again or something. He probably should have specified ‘fallen asleep’ rather than ‘passed out’ though, because the incredulous look and surprised ‘What?!’ he gets from the guildmaster is telling that he took it the wrong way. Before he gets the chance to elaborate however Kurogane’s already out of the workshop and approaching the entrance. He calms down once he gets there and sees that you’re fine (because those few seconds between getting there he was increasingly concerned) but he really doesn’t want to leave you outside lying on the floor right outside of the building.

Kurogane tries a good couple times to wake you up before he just decides to pick you up and carry you back inside the guild if only to get you out of the sun, and he ends up running into Amatsumara right as he makes it back into the workshop. The blacksmith is understandably confused to see you snoring away in Kurogane’s arms, even more so once he learns that a few minutes ago you were lying right outside of the guild’s entrance for a while before you’d been noticed. They end up having to clear off one of the workshop tables to prop you up on, and in between you seated and talking you finally stir, offering a groggy wave and greeting before proceeding to lie right back onto the table with no explanation, which definitely earns you a couple of baffled outcries about falling back to sleep so quickly.

Once the other Crafters learn about what happened it doesn’t take long for them to come to you about it, though you’re still tired and ready to fall asleep right on the table the whole time. In the end you end up bunking in the spare cot in Hephaestus’ workshop to sleep off the remaining exhaustion, with one of them dropping by every once in a while to check on you while you catch up on the sleep you needed enough to fall asleep on the concrete for.

[kurowrites]

“I don’t want your apology.” - Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian

Playing fast and loose with canon, basically.

There is technically a second part to this, but I’m lazy right now. Give me a hint if you want more of this. ^^

—

When Lan Wangji had first laid eyeson Wei Wuxian, he had immediately known that this boy was trouble. It wasevident to anybody who had ever met him: a boy (for he could hardly be calledan adult) who was unable to follow the rules, delighted in making mischief, andwas an incurable flirt.

That Wei Wuxian was a murderer and atraitor, however, Lan Wangji would have never expected. Wei Wuxian was manythings, but not that. Lan Wangji had believed that.

He had been wrong.

—

Lan Wangji woke up early the morningafter Jiang Fengmian and Jin Guangshan had come to Cloud Recesses to negotiatethe recent fight between their children. The engagement between Jiang Yanli andJin Zixuan had been broken the previous day, though no one had gone to bedentirely satisfied. Lan Wangji had hoped the next day would bring a change, but…

An uproar outside woke him from hisslumber way before his usual time to rise. With a frown, he quickly dressed andleft the Jingshi, ready to chastise whoever had broken the sacred silence ofCloud Recesses.

What awaited him, however, was notwhat he had expected. It wasn’t a guest disciple who had broken the rules bydrinking all night and then exposing himself to all the gathered sects. Itwasn’t a clumsy servant that had accidentally caused a fire in the kitchen. Thecause of the uproar was the body of Jin Guangshan, found lying in a pool of hisown blood, stabbed to death and left lying on the floor of the library for allto see.

Though it was too late now, LanWangji immediately called for a doctor. He hastened to keep anyone else awayfrom the scene unless he personally permitted them access, and sent the servantwho had found the body into temporary confinement in the infirmary so they couldcompose themselves.

Lan Xichen arrived not long afterhim, bringing the doctor with him. He informed Lan Wangji in a harried voice that,of all things, the Yin Iron was gone as well. The Yin Iron, and, it seemed, WeiWuxian and two disciples from the Wen clan, Wen Qing and Wen Ning.

A disquieting thought entered LanWangji’s mind. Wei Wuxian had known about the Yin Iron. And Wen Qing might havebeen looking for it.

If there was one senior disciplethat could go toe to toe with a sect leader and win the fight, it was WeiWuxian.

“Gather all the disciples in themain hall,” Lan Xichen advised him, and then joined the doctor, who was alreadybent over Jin Guangshang’s body, assessing the damage.

Lan Wangji looked at the glassy eyesof Jin Guangshan, the pool of blood surrounding him, already drying. There wasno hope for him. He must have been dead for hours.

Why had Wei Wuxian done such athing?

—

“How can this be?” Lan Qiren askedfor what must have been the tenth time, as they all gathered in the main hall, butno answer was forthcoming.

Jiang Fengmian stood a little behindhim, his face pale and drawn as he held his crying daughter in his arms, tryingin vain to soothe her. Jin Zixuan stood close to them, surrounded by thegrieving disciples of Lanling Jin, his own face expressionless and clearly inshock. Lan Wangji could not blame him; not only was his father dead, he wouldalso be the new sect leader from this very day onwards. He wasn’t sure JinZixuan was ready for the role.

Lan Xichen was still overseeing theremoval of Jin Guangshan’s body, his face turned an unhealthy shade of whitethat worried Lan Wangji. Gusu had always prided itself as a neutral space,where those who would be welcomed could stay safely. This safety had now beenviolated.

The disciples from the remainingsects had huddled into a corner of the main hall, but some of the Yunmeng Jiangdisciples were missing. Jiang Cheng, upon realizing that Wei Wuxian was gone,had immediately gathered some of his fellow disciples and run after him.

Lan Wangji’s first instinct had beento join Jiang Cheng, but his brother had needed him to make sure everyone keptcalm as they started to assess the situation. But his own mind kept racing evenas he calmed down some hysteric junior disciples. How could Wei Wuxian havedone this? Why had he killed a sect leader? Had Jin Guangshan discovered themred-handed as they were stealing the Yin Iron? He needed answers. CloudRecesses, the Gusu Lan sect needed answers. Blood had been spilled on theirground. He could not forgive that.

As soon as he could, he took leaveof his brother and returned to the Jingshi. He picked up his guqin and a fewnecessities, and left Cloud Recesses to follow Jiang Cheng’s group. Lan Xichenhadn’t wanted him to go on his own, but it was too dangerous to involve thosethat didn’t know about the Yin Iron They might simply be walking into a deathtrap.

Jiang Cheng didn’t know about theYin Iron, either, Lan Wangji was sure. And while Wei Wuxian might still havemorals enough not to kill his own brother, Jiang Cheng had no idea what he waswalking into. Lan Wangji needed to hurry. He needed to find Jiang Cheng beforehe found Wei Wuxian.

A short while after Lan Wangji leftCloud Recesses and hastened after them, he realized that Jiang Cheng had made significantprogress in the short time that Lan Wangji had remained behind. The shock (and,in Jiang Cheng’s case, the anger) must have given the disciples wings. He followedafter them with equal fervor, and yet he was unable to catch up, only barelyable to follow their path. Did they have to put the strength of the YunmengJiang sect to the test now of all times?

The trail he followed quickly leftGusu, heading straight towards Yunmeng territory. It made sense; Wei Wuxian wasmost familiar with the land surrounding Lotus Pier.

But then, the unthinkable happened.Perhaps Wei Wuxian knew his brother far too well, or he had hoped that anypursuer would fall for the trick, but he apparently had managed to lead hisbrother astray; their routes diverged not far from Lotus Pier. For a moment,Lan Wangji hesitated. Should he follow Jiang Cheng, to bring him back onto theright path?

But no, there was no time for that. Hehad crossed swords with Wei Wuxian before. He could do so again. He followedWei Wuxian’s trail, knowing that at any moment, he could be slipping out of hisreach. Once he was gone, who knew what would happen.

Before long, he realized that he recognizedthe place he’d been led to. He’d never been here himself, but he knew it fromone of the many volumes of history that the library at Cloud Recesses housed.They were in Yiling now, at the foot of the Burial Mounds. And ancientbattleground, the burned earth soaked with the blood of two armies whose nameswere forgotten now. But their vengeful energy stil remained, undiminished. Theair was heavy with evil intent, growing stronger with every step that LanWangji took. The trees that had formerly been so lush in Yunmeng were barrenhere, dried up, shriveled and grey. No living, breathing thing seemed to beable to subsist here. Only the spirits of those long dead, sucking the life outof everything that dared to step foot into this hostile landscape.

That was where Lan Wangji finallyfound Wei Wuxian, climbing the slope of the mountain. Him and the two Wen siblings.

“Wei Wuxian!” he shouted.

Wei Wuxian froze and turned around.He gave the Wen siblings a sign, and the two of them vanished quickly among thecrooked trees.

Lan Wangji didn’t care about themright now. Wei Wuxian was the one holding the Yin Iron. Wei Wuxian was the onewho had betrayed them. He gripped his sword and moved closer, until he was onlysteps away from Wei Wuxian.

He looked tired, pale, his eyeswild.

He looked like a madman.

“Wei Wuxian. What have you done?”

“Lan Zhan, please, hear me out!” WeiWuxian begged, holding out a hand as if to stop him from coming closer. “It’sall a misunderstanding!”

“Jin Guangshan is dead! You killedhim on the grounds of Cloud Recesses! Is that a misunderstanding?”

Wei Wuxian shook.

“No,” he whispered. “Lan Zhan, I amso sorry. I did not want to do this to you.”

Something ugly flared in Lan Wangji’schest.

“I don’t want your apology,” he spatout, before he could think better of it.

“Lan Wangji, please,” Wei Wuxian begged.A tear rolled down his face.

“No.”

They stared at each other for amoment, wordlessly.

“Please, forgive me,” Wei Wuxiansaid. Then he raised his hand, the Yin Iron in his grasp.

It would take Lan Wangji a long timeto understand what exactly Wei Wuxian had done, but the next moment, a wall ofinvisible force slammed down between them, so violently that Lan Wangji wasthrown back, sliding down the slope of the mountain. When he had collectedhimself, Wei Wuxian was gone.

And no matter how long Lan Wangjitried, or how far he walked the circumference of the mountain, there was no wayin.

Wei Wuxian was beyond his reach.

—

Jiang Cheng eventually found him,after what must have been hours of wandering the barrierl. He came not alone.The disciples he had taken from Gusu had been joined by more disciples fromLotus Pier, and even Yu Ziyuan herself had come.

“Where is he?” Jiang Cheng asked,coming to a halt next to Lan Wangji.

Lan Wangji pointed at the mountainin front of him.

“There,” he said, the words tastinglike ash in his mouth. “Behind the barrier. There is no way in.”

Jiang Cheng shook with anger. Hepushed at the barrier and got thrown back, scrabbling to stand up again, barelykeeping himself from trying again.

Lan Wangji watched him dispassionately. If LanWangji couldn’t find a way in, Jiang Cheng would never manage.

“WEI YING!” Jiang Cheng shouted. “WEIYING, COME OUT.”

But everything remained silent, noteven the sound of a bird breaking the eerie silence.

They stayed there for seven nights.

They stayed and received advice fromall the sect leaders and wise men that they could think of asking, but no onecould find a way in. As time passed, more and more wards went up inside thebarrier, until the defensive wall was so dangerous it was enough to get closeto it to have one’s strength sapped entirely away. They could do nothing butleave guards positioned around the mountain, retreat, and look for a differentway to get in.

With something not unlike regret inhis heart, Lan Wangji returned to Cloud Recesses. He was welcomed by LanXichen, still pale, but there were no words they could exchange that would relievetheir pain. There was nothing Lan Wangji could do about the pain that wasgrowing stronger in his chest every day.

Not long after his return, thefirst rumours about the demonic cultivator living in Burial Mounds started tospread. A man who commanded the dead and leeched his energy from the living.

The Yiling Patriarch, they calledhim.

Wei Ying, Lan Wangji thought to himself. What haveyou done?

[alternatewarning]

Music Box Carousel - Whumptober 2020 Fic

Entry Number 6 and 8 for Whumptober 2020: "Stop, please” and Abandoned / Isolation

Title: Music Box Carousel Fandom: Final Fantasy XV Pairing: None Rating: T Trigger Warnings: Child neglect, fat shaming, bullying Summary: It was just a normal day at elementary school for Prompto: some name-calling, bullying, losing his lunch, and wondering why on Eos his life sucks so much.

Cross posted to Ao3

“Come on, hand over your lunch.  You clearly don’t need it~”  The group of four boys laughed, the one in front holding out his hand.  Prompto tried to take a step back; they had already backed him into a corner, nothing to save him but the quiet stretch of an empty school hallway.  Everyone was in their classrooms or at the store getting snacks so he had to either hand over his food or hope that a teacher came and bailed him out.  The leader, Prompto couldn’t remember his name since he was one grade up but pretty much everyone knew him as the school bully, seemed to be losing his patience.

“Come on fatso, hurry up.  What are you dumb too?  Give.  Me.  Your.  Lunch.  Or else I’ll beat you up.”  His outstretched hand turned into a fist as he stepped towards the blond.  Prompto looked down at the bag in his hand.  He liked the green curry bento but it wasn’t worth getting beat up.  Plus, they would probably smash his glasses and he needed those.  Slowly he held out his convenience store bag and they took it with a smirk.

“Good boy~  You’re going to give me your lunch tomorrow too, right?  And something not so gross.  Curry, really?  Buy me some good bread and milk.  See you tomorrow!”  The group laughed as they walked to their classroom, letting Prompto slowly slide down the wall that his back had been pressed against.  His heart was thudding in his chest.  He needed to fight back but he knew it would be hopeless, why bother?

By the end of the school day, Prompto felt like he was starving.  His lunch had been taken away and his money to get dinner had been in the same bag.  Which meant he was going home with nothing, no lunch, no dinner, and no snack.  His stomach grumbled unhappily as he got his bag ready to go home.  Maybe if he just didn’t think about it, it would be fine.

The entire way home all he could think about was how hungry he was.  He passed by his favorite fast food joint and it smelled like heaven.  But the coins he fished out of his pockets weren't even enough for a drink.  With a heavy sigh, he turned the corner to keep walking home, his stomach gurgling again at the whiff of food.  Prompto was so focused on the ground at his feet that he didn’t notice anyone in front of him until he literally walked headfirst into another body.  He let out a small yelp as he fell back, partially in shock and partially because whoever he’d walked into too shoved his shoulders.

“Why’d you tell on me?!”  Prompto adjusted his glasses to see the group of four from before.  But now they were a whole lot angrier.

“Wha-what are you talking about?”  He blinked up at the boys as he tried to stutter out an apology.  “I'm sorry but I didn’t tell anyone, I promise.”  Maybe a teacher had seen them take his lunch?

“Shut up you freak!”  One of the boys rushed forward and kicked Prompto in the gut, knocking him down on his back.  They were in an ally between the fast-food restaurant and a side street that most people didn’t use during the day, there was no one to see them.

“You tattled on us and now we’re in trouble.  It’s your fault!  If you weren’t so shy and fat we wouldn’t have taken anything from you!”  Another kick connected with the blond who decided that even if he tried to run it would be pointless.  There were four of them and one of him and at least two he knew were on the soccer team.  So instead he just curled up as much as he could, using his arms to protect his face.

“I’m sorry, stop, please!  I never told anybody!”  He shrieked in between grunts as all four boys circled around him and started to kick.  At first, it seemed like they were just trying to get out their anger and maybe that was okay.  If they kicked him now then tomorrow maybe they would leave him alone.  But as they kept going they weren’t calming down.  Instead, it felt like they were starting to kick harder.

“Please!  Stop, please!  It hurts…”  One of the boys nailed him in the back so hard that he fell forward, hitting his chin on the pavement.  Since now he was on his stomach he pulled up his arms to cover his face.  The kicking changed to stomping, sneakers slamming into his back over and over.  No matter how much Prompto screamed or told them he hadn’t spoken to anyone, it didn’t stop.  Eventually, the four seemed to tire, giving a few more good kicks to his ribs, before moving on in silence.  He waited on the pavement, waiting to hear them coming back.  

After what felt like an eternity he opened his eyes, his vision blurry.  Huh?  He blinked a few more times before realizing that his glasses had skidded across the ground and were now lying against the wall of the alley.  It probably happened when he was kicked to the ground.  Slowly he forced himself to his knees, his body stiff and sore.  He felt like they’d kicked or stepped on every inch of his body from his fingers to his back to his toes.  He managed to crawl over to his glasses, dirty but unharmed, before putting them on.  The world was now marred by specks of dirt and gravel but at least he could see.

After another few minutes just sitting on the ground to recover, Prompto collected himself enough to go home.  It wouldn’t hurt any less at home and then he could take a shower and cry.  For a moment he hoped that his foster parents weren’t home but then he just sighed.  There was no reason to hope for something that he knew would be true.

The rest of the walk home was fortunately uneventful, the streets empty of passersby, and anyone that did see him didn’t even ask if he was okay.  Maybe it was better this way.  When he reached his house there was a letter on the table.  Before he even picked it up, the blond knew what it would say.  His parents were called out for business.  Again.  They would be gone for a few weeks.  Again.  There was money for his food in the envelope on the table.  Again.  Be good.  He didn’t even read the letter this time, opting to just check the envelope to see how much they left.  That was usually the indication of how long they would be gone.

There was a lot more than usual in there.  For a brief moment, he wondered if they were leaving for good.  It wasn’t as if they had any reason to come back.  One foster kid they didn’t really care about, a tiny house that looked like it had never been furnished beyond the necessities.  That was it.  That was their life in Insomnia.  Loneliness started to bubble up in his chest.  This happened all the time, them leaving for work somewhere else, anywhere else.  But this time he really wished they hadn’t.

He wanted to crawl into someone’s arms and cry.  He wanted there to be someone to tell him that it was okay, that he wasn’t alone, that it would get better.  But instead, he sat in an empty kitchen with nothing more than a hastily typed letter and a pile of money.  There was no one there to hug him and pet his hair like he saw on TV sometimes.  Maybe parents like that didn’t really exist.  But he wished they did.

After sitting at the empty table long enough for the sun to go down, the blond finally forced himself to stand.  Everything hurt even worse than it did before, his pain buoyed in his chest by the heavy weight of an emotion he didn’t want to name.  He knew what it was, loneliness, isolation, feeling like the only people that were supposed to care about him abandoned him.  But if he gave into that emotion then he knew there was no coming back.  So instead he just nodded to himself with a huff.  He needed to clean up and go to bed.  Tomorrow was another day.

[readbeneaththelines]

His Possession Pt. 6

This is NSFW, PLEASE READ WITH DISCRETION.

A/N: Debts are collected, one way or the other. Unfortunately, you were the collection for your father’s debt.

Yoongi is ruthless, cunning, and obsessive.

Characters: Yoongi x Reader

Warnings’ violence, language

this chapter has an extra warning: Rough handling of reader. please read with caution.

Word Count: 2130

This is NSFW, PLEASE READ WITH DISCRETION.

cr. to gif owner

You awoke to the sensation of weight across your waist. With eyes still closed, your hand felt along the intruding object. You felt an arm, wrist, and fingers hold you from your right side. Opening one eye, you looked to your right, seeing a sleeping Yoongi next to you. You should have been startled, scared even, but you just watched him. He looked almost kind when he slept. No hard lines, no scowl on his face. You would even venture to say handsome, under any other circumstances. You tried to fidget your way from under him, but when you moved, so did he. His arm tugging you closer and you held your breath. Sleepy eyes opened and it took him a moment to realize the predicament. He shot upright, nearly falling off the bed as he tried to distance himself from you.

"I- I must have fallen asleep." He stammered out.

 "You did, but it's okay. You needed rest too. But I must say, I never pictured you as a cuddler."

"Shut up! You must be feeling better." You laughed at his flustered appearance, his hair tousled messily, and voice still groggy. 

"I am, thank you." You stretched your arms, a content sigh passing your lips. The sound stirred something low in Yoongi’s gut. Clearing his troat, he managed to squeak out an apology.

 “Sorry, I’m still trying to wake up.Why don’t I order you some food brought up. While you’re eating, and you will eat something, I’ll go shower.” You nodded in agreement, the audible growl of your stomach confirming you were, indeed, hungry. He called down to the kitchen, ordering you a light breakfast of toast and fruit, with juice. When it arrived he excused himself and hurried out of the room. 

The shower gave him time to calm down. But thinking about how you looked when you stretched, the way your back arched while you sighed in an innocent, yet completely seductive way, made him fight to keep his arousal in check. He couldn’t believe that, with you laid up in bed sick, he had a fleeting thought of you in any sexual manner. 

No way Yoongi! She’s your possession, not your lover.

The water ran cool as he began to fully awaken and think clearly. 

But damn, she felt good next to you.

He cursed himself under his breath at the lingering image of you lying net to him in his pyjamas. Which, in fact, did make you look even more inticing. Groaning loudly he quickly rinsed and got dressed. When he returned, he was pleased to see that you had cleared your plate. 

“Did I eat good enough, sir?” you asked coyly, a proud grin on your face. 

“Yes, it will help you get your energy back. You want anything else before I get going I have a lot to get done to make up for last night.” 

“I’m sorry about that. I hope you didn’t miss anything important because of me.” 

“Everything I have to do is important, but it can be made up if I get moving.” he stood in the doorway, watching you drink down the last of your juice.

 “The only thing I want is a bath. A nice long soaking bath. But I’ll manage until later.” A mental image of you naked, immersed in steaming hot water had Yoongi biting the inside of his cheek. How is it that he is having such images with you in your position. 

Because she is your possession, Yoongi. You own her, she is whatever you want her to be.

"I’ll call for one of the housemaids to help you draw a bath. But only after Dr. Choi or one of his assistants checks on you later.” He pulled out his phone, making a call. “They will be here within the hour, so you can get one after that.” 

“Yoongi?” you called his name softly. “Will you be gone all day? I mean, I was just wondering because I will be stuck up here all day by myself, and I have no one to talk to.” Yoongi rolled his eyes in exasperation. “I’ll send Kook up here, he’ll talk your ear off. You’ll beg for quiet after he’s done.” you both chuckle at the proclamation, You finding yourself admiring his gummy smile.

 “I think that’s the first time you have smiled since I’ve been here.” He dropped the grin and frowned suddenly. It was the first time in a long time that he had remembered genuinely smiling.

“I’ll see you later, Y/N. Try to get some more rest.” And with that he left, mentally smacking himself for his dirty thoughts.

“Bye.” you said to thin air, settling back under the covers. You were stirred awake by the voice of a woman beside you.

 “Good morning Miss. I’m Dr. Choi’s assistant, Marilu. I was just checking your vitals. You seem to be improving nicely. I’m sure you are ready to get this IV out. Let’s get this out and make you a bit more comfortable.”

 In mere minutes, you were free of the invading needle and tube. Afterwards, you were greeted by a smiling Jungkook at your door. His smile reminded you of a cute little bunny and your couldn’t help but smile back. He sat down beside you, and instantly you felt right at home in his presence. He ate lunch with you, all the while telling you his story. You learned how he became one of Yoongi's men. The close knit family that they all were. 

"So Yoongi is a good leader for you all?" You asked Jungkook.

 "Of course! After his parents died and he almost died, he changed. When he was younger, he was very much the hard headed rebel. It was his way or the highway. All the weight that is now on his shoulders, he carries himself. He had no one to help him, no one beside him. He allows us to have a family if we want, but only Joon and Jin have one. The rest of us remain loyal to him out of respect. He cares for us from a distance, making sure we are well taken care of. He is rough around the edges, but he is a good man." 

You listened carefully to what he told you. Everything Yoongi did, he did by himself. He carries the burden of a tight family on his own two shoulders, alone. Not only was he friend, but sometimes 'appa' to the younger men that grew up under his watchful eye.

“Why did he want to take me? I understand that it was to pay off an old debt, but he could have taken our money, taken over the family business as payment. So, why me?” Jungkook looked down, avoiding looking you in the eyes.

“Do you remember much of your childhood, Y/N? I mean before you really grew up? Your family and Yoongi’s family spent many summers together. Yoongi remembers when you were born. He remembers holding you as a baby when the families travelled together. He watched you grow up for the first few years. You were like family to him. And when he found out that your parents were involved with what happened, it broke his heart and angered him beyond measure. Taking you has more than one reason. He wants his revenge, yes, but it goes beyond that. I’m sorry, I’ve told you more than I should already.” 

“Yes, you have” Yoongi’s hushed voice came from behind Jungkook. Looking over Kook’s shoulder, you saw him standing in the doorway, arms crossed over his chest. 

“Don’t be angry with him, I begged him to tell me. It’s my fault, not his. He only told me so I might understand things a bit better. He wasn’t trying to divulge anything secretive. Please, don’t be mad at him, if anything be mad at me.” you pleaded with Yoongi, who only stared at Jungkook. “Out, chatterbox. You better be thankful she is sacrificing herself in your place.” 

After Jungkook left, you were alone with Yoongi. You swung your legs over the side of the bed, facing the doorway. “Thank you for not yelling at him. It really wasn’t much he told me. Just that you and I grew up together, that you knew me before this. I want to say that I’m sorry for what my family did to yours. I’m sorry that there was nothing I could have done to stop it. It doesn't mean what you did was right, but I think if I was in your place, I could understand.” 

“You don’t understand anything, Y/N! I had no one growing up! You had both your parents, I had to do everything on my own. I had to run this family, I had to grow up overnight, unlike you. You got to enjoy your youth, have fun, be a kid. I had to become leader, confidant, and brother to all these men. You know nothing!” Yoongi slammed the door behind him, making you jump in your seat. He came within inches of you, his hot breath coming in waves over your face as he spoke, his tone calm and terrifying. “You know nothing, little girl, so don’t you dare patronize me with false sympathy.”

You leaned back onto the bed, cowering slightly from his angered tone. Your eyes searched his darkened orbs, reading the pain, anger, and frustration the displayed.

“It’s not false sympathy, Yoongi. I meant it. Every word. I’m sorry I was part of what happened to you. Even though I didn’t know anything, I’m part of my family so I am part of the problem. If me being your toy, your thing you own, if that will help make things right, then I will do whatever it takes to make up for what you went through.” you started to reach for his hand, but he jerked away from your touch. Your hand fell on your lap, your heart breaking for the broken man before you. 

“If we are done here, I’m going to take my hot bath now. If you would see yourself out, then I will get moving.” You rose to your feet, nearly falling because of your weak and unsteady legs. Yoongi was on his feet, grabbing your arms to hold you up. Once you were steady, you twisted from his grip and quietly walked to the bathroom. You closed the door behind you, then turned on the faucet and let the tub fill with steamy hot water as you stripped out of his clothes. After gathering towels and the necessities, you allowed your body to sink into the steaming water, the sting of hot water a welcomed intrusion. You lowered yourself until only the top of your shoulders and your head were above water. You stretch out achy legs, your head falling back onto the tub's rim. Vapor surrounded you as you added bath salts for aromatherapy. You sensed every fiber relaxing in the bath, your muscles easing and your tension melting away. 

Damn him, then. Such a stubborn ass.  He deserves to be all grumpy and miserable if he’s going to be like that anyway!

You complained and grumbled as you soothe your body. The cut on your cheek was healing nicely, and the bruises you got the day they held you tight to keep you from running were finally starting to fade. Before long there would be no visible sign of the hell you had gone through. Just the emotional scars would remain. Those thoughts brought you back to him. He surely had emotional and mental scars from what he had been through too. He had lived with his for the past twelve years. Your scars were just beginning to form. They were still fresh and ugly, his were hard and buried. Maybe one day your scars would match his. 

There was a knock at the door. “Go away Min Yoongi. I’m tired of trying to talk to your insolent stubborn ass.” You hollered back. When there was no answer you returned to closing your eyes. Wanting to wash your hair, you ducked under the water with a deep breath. Instantaneously you were jerked up by two strong hands. 

You screamed out, forgetting you were under water. Choking on water that you swallowed had you scared shitless. 

"Are you okay?" The tone one of fear.

"What the hell!" You spit out. Looking up you saw Yoongi, eyes wide and terror filled. " I heard you go under. I thought you passed out." 

"Get your hands off of me! I wasn't drowning, I was wetting my hair you idiot! You made me choke!" You were mad, and you couldn't contain your anger any more. "What do you care, you thoughtless uncaring monster!" He was taken aback by the name you called him, his hands letting go of you. 

So I am a monster.

@min-shookga-yoongi @beautifulseoulliar @agustd-suga-yoongii @astronomyturtle @aspaceformyself @dreamyoongi @holy-yoongi @trashkazuya @maxinaptak @micky1518 @rosiemilas @karri570 @seoulsunshineandstories @kwonnansi @xjamlessparkx @berryjam17 @kingsuckjin @kpoppingthempills

[missblissy]

SO I ACCIDENTLY DELETED THE ASK BUUT! Anon asked about my OCs so here they are ;v;

These are my two important children. I do not have their demon forms drawn out yet because THIS IS A VERY OLD REF OF THEM ((I drew this in 2017. I do not have a working tablet but im GETTING ONE FOR CHRISTMAS SO IM GONNA BE DRAWING AGAIN SOON!! This is just their general bio, not necessarily Hazbin hotel))

Sage Helvig:

Age: 26 Gender: Female Race: Mixed. Japanese/Europen Descent.   Status: Alive Build/Body Type/Physical Frame: Smol Height: 4′9″ Weight: 160 lbs Skin: White Hair: Long black hair that stops above her waist, wavy but little to nose curls Eyes: Blue Other defining features/extra anatomy: Has many piercings on her ears, both ears are completely covered with piercings. Voice: Soft-spoken and relatively monotone. Doesn’t express a lot of emotions when speaking. Often mistaken for being tired. Style: POP PUNK!!! EDGY!!! EMO!!!!

Loves/Favorites: - Tol Husband - Magic/Pagan worship - Japanese cuisine and culture - Archery/Bowhunting - Studying Mythology - Pepsi ((She’s addicted)) - ALL BREAKFAST FOOD - And fruits. She prefers fruit over candy - Chemistry - Cleaning ((It’s a form of therapy for her)) - Science ((in general)) - Crabs ((She keeps them as pets and thinks they are the cutest things every)) - Winter and Fall - Swords/Daggers/Blades

Hates: - Candy, like unnaturally sweet things ((like taffy, lemon drops, sour patch kids, etc etc)) - Math - Cooking - Most internet culture. - Evil/Dark spirits/Demons ((Anything malevolent)) - People who don’t know how to shut up about cars - Bugs - Spring and Summer

Hobbies: - Studying different culture’s mythology/history/religions. - Witchcraft/Spellcasting - Demon slaying - Archery - Chemistry - Swordsmanship

Hopes/Dreams: - To one day rid the world of all demonic and malevolent spirits. - Have a daughter of her own and raise her the way she was raised - To become a skilled and honorable Demon Slayer

Fears/Nightmares: - Anything bad happening to Van or her brother - Death - Demonic possession ((Ya know, being possessed and shit)) - Hurting the innocent. - Getting sent to Hell

Best Quality: - She is a skilled Demon Slayer who has seen more combat than the average person. She used a mix of a short bow, rapier and magical abilities when hunting and fighting demons and spirits Greatest Flaw: - She doesn’t put enough trust and faith into those around her. She struggles with taking on to much at once and burning herself out. She tries to hard to fix everything by herself and tends to push the people she cares most away from her. How does the character picture himself/herself? - She doesn’t see or view herself as the legend she is slowly becoming. She’s very humble and feels as though she is at the bottom of the ladder when it comes to anything she does. There is always room for improvement. How do others see him/her? - One of the best Demon Slayers there are out there, many people are fame struck when the come meet her because she is from a long demon slayer that dates back to some of the earliest centries of human culture and society. This causes her and Van to move a lot.

Most valued possession: - The rapier sword that she was gifted too by her father as he died from a fatal wound during a battle with a demon. It is the same rapier sword that she used to kill said demon that murdered her father.

Is he/she motivated by possibility or necessity? - Necessity. She knows that she is needed because there are so few people left on the planet with gifts like hers ((I.e Magical abilities)) How does he/she view the future and/or the past? - Sage thinks there is a grim future for humanity and has little faith in those around her. She tries not to think about the past either but uses it as motivation to keep moving forward. What is his/her philosophy on life and death? - She fears death more than anything, only because she doesn’t know what kind of afterlife she will have. Sage doesn’t think death is the end, and believe there is life beyond death. She wants to live as long as she can, possibly growing old with Van. What kind of energy level do they usually have? Sleepy and depressed. She’s not a bubbly person and is very serious and stoic and quiet.

Does he/she have a temper? Yes but only if you push her to the edge or if she’s been cornered in some way.

Polite or rude? Rude Stingy or generous? Generous Leader or a follower? Leader More happy by themselves or in a group? By herself What is his/her sexual preference/experience/values? - Sage is bisexual, monogamous, and demisexual. Before she married Vanderlinde she dated both men and women. She doesn’t sleep around and find causal sex repulsive ((for her, she doesn’t care what other people do with their sex lives)) -History/Background- - Sage was born from a Japanese mother and a German father. She was born in Japan but her family moved around every few years due to being members of a secret society dedicated to exterminating demons. Her mother is still alive however her father died when she was 17 years old in a fatal battle with a Demon. - She has spent almost her entire life working for a secret society of demon slayers, which she took on as a full-time job after her father died. - Sage has an older half brother named Kael, they share the same mother but a different father. - She received formal schooling through the secret soceity she worked for. She was able to still get her high school education while traveling around the world to slay demons. - She met Vanderlinde when she was 20 years old and after just moving to the United States. Vanderlinde was a priest at the time and Sage had just enrolled in university for a chemistry degree. They quickly fell in love and Sage welcomed Vanderlinde into her secret society with open arms and Vanderlinde happily joined.

((There is so much more to Sage’s backstory I’m just TIRED and SLEEPY so this is all ya’ll get.))

___________________________________________

Vanderlinde Helvig:

Age: 31 Gender: Male Race: Cucasion, Scandinavian descent. Status: Alive Build/Body Type/Physical Frame: Tol Height: 6′0″ Weight: 230 lbs Skin: White Hair: Short blonde fluffy hair Eyes: Green Other defining features/extra anatomy: He has several tattoos, all of them are based of Nordic Mythology, Nordic Ruins, and Scandinavian Vikings Voice: Deep but soothing. Imagine what butter would sound like if it could talk.SMOOTH Style: Business Causal, he’s a professor so he wears a lot of dress shirts and sweaters. This boy loves his cashmere sweaters.

Loves/Favorites: - His smol wife - Music ((He loves pop punk, rock, grunge, metal, etc etc)) - THE LORD ALL MIGHTY - Sunday Prayer - His Students - Teaching - Nordic Mythology - Cooking - PEACE AND LOVE - Coffee and tea. - Summer and Fall - Going to concerts/rock shows - Motorcycles

Hates: - Spring and Winter - Unnecessary arguments/debates - People who refuse to educate themselves - Lazy Students - Grading paper work - People who don’t know how to drive - Demonic/Evil Spirits - Pepsi ((He’s a Coke-a-cola person)) - Alcohol ((And Drunk people. If you are drunk he won’t even try and talk to you))

Hobbies: - Reading - Writing ((He’s written many books about religious study books)) - Exploring the unknown ((He breaks your modern Indiana Jones tbh lmao)) - Providing Exorcisms/religious healing/cleanings - Working out/staying fit - Researching religions and mythology

Hopes/Dreams: - WORLD PEACE - That everyone can be happy and treated equally - To destroy every demonic/evil spirit - To have a child one day, just one. Doesn’t matter if it’s a boy or a girl he’ll love them the same. - To be recognized worldwide for his work and struggles.

Fears/Nightmares: - Losing Sage ((In any way. Like if she’s killed or if she leaves him etc etc.)) - Becoming possessed and harming people. - The Devil/Lucifer/Satan - Demonic spirits ((He’s always afraid of them even if he’d confronted by them)) - Heights/Being up high - The ocean

Best Quality: - Vanderlinde is a very mild-mannered person. It’s hard to piss him off, he’s very calm and collective and has incredible control over his emotions. People often describe him with a “healing” personality and an “open mind.” Greatest Flaw: - He lets his fears control him. Too often he runs away from things that quiet literally scare him. He is not a fighter and doesn’t enjoy fighting, he’d rather run away defend himself or those around him. This often leads people to say he is cowardly. How does the character picture himself/herself? - Vanderlinde sees himself as a weak softy who can’t win a single physically fight. He doesn’t have a lot of self-confidence so he doubts himself and his skills way too much. He thinks he a push-over that anyone could walk all over. How do others see him/her? - Many people view Vanderlinde as an incredibly intelligent and kind professor who cares about his student’s education more than anything in the world. ((Next to his love for Sage)) People describe him as a very kind and loving person with a big heart.

Most valued possession: - His rosary, he carries it with him always. It was a gift to him from a priest that change his views on Christianity and other religions.

Is he/she motivated by possibility or necessity? - Necessity. Vanderlinde knows there aren’t enough people in the world fighting the dark forces. He knows it is his duty to educate the masses about what is going on when no one is looking. How does he/she view the future and/or the past? - Vanderlinde hopes for a pretty and peaceful future, a safe world where his child can grow up without fear. What is his/her philosophy on life and death? - Vanderlinde does not fear death, he knows that he is going to Hell anyway, so he might as well enjoy his life to the fullest until that day comes. What kind of energy level do they usually have? He’s very relaxed, calm and cool. He’s known for wearing a comforting smile and using healing words to lift people up and make them feel better about themselves.

Does he/she have a temper? No. Vanderlinde has incredible control over his emotions. Even when he’s pissed off he’s still nice, happy, and trying his best to please others.

Polite or rude? Polite Stingy or generous? Generous Leader or a follower? Leader More happy by themselves or in a group? By himself What is his/her sexual preference/experience/values? - Vanderlinde is a straight monogamous male. He’s experimented before here and there but he prefers women for the most part. He is very private about his sex life and gets very uncomfortable when people talk/ask about it. -History/Background- - Vanderlinde grew up in an orphanage for wayward boys, he never knew his parents and refuses to look into them. He was born in the United States. He doesn’t want to know why or how he ended up at the orphanage. It was run by a Catholic church, where he grew up with a deep faith in the Lord. He began to question his faith when the Priest he looked up to had passed away. - Around 18 years old Vanderlinde left the orphanage and went on a soul searching journal across the United State. He was homeless during this time as he traveled cross country, drinking, doing drugs and learning about all different types of faith. When he turned 20 he turned back to the Church and became a priest for the next five years. - He met Sage when he was 25, she was 20 at the time. Because she was a pagan witch, Vanderlinde was punished for getting himself involved with her. At the same time, he also got in trouble for researching other religions other than Christianity. He chose to renounce his priesthood and left the church because he did not agree with their rules. After that, Vanderlinde worked towards becoming a professor at the local university where he could freely research and teach others - After he fell in love with Sage, Vanderlinde joined her secret society, more than happy to join a cause he believed in and was willing to fight for.

((Again, there is so much more to Vanderlinde’s back story but Im just so tired and I wanted to quickly summarize the 20 pages I have for these two dorks.))

[honestlyhaikyuutrash]

Mafia Au

STOP!!

BEFORE YOU READ THIS, I GOTTA SHOUT OUT @volleydorkscentral FOR BEING AMAZING AND HELPING ME OUT WITH THIS!!! ALL THESE HC’S ARE  ALL HER IDEAS BECAUSE SHE WAS MY ANGEL IN NEED WHEN I COULDN’T THINK OF ANYTHING. (( ALL THE CREDITS GO TO HER FOR THESE HCS, I MERELY ADDED THE BULLET POINTS AND BOLDED SOME THINGS)) FOR SOME REASON MY MIND WAS DRAWING A BLANK, SO A BIG FAT ( ˘ ³˘)♥ 𝒸𝒽𝓊!~~ TO HER!! LITERALLY AN ANGEL!!! 

Karasuno

Head of the Family: Daichi Sawamura

Anyone that has ever met Daichi for the very first would have no clue that he was a leader of a ruthless gang. To the outside world, he is very calm, cool, and collected and rarely slips up, unless when it came to his members or his partner.

If anyone dares to hurt his precious family, they better watch tf out. 

He gets really protective of everyone in his group because it really is a family to him. He especially is protective over the younger members because they can get easily influenced by the trouble duo (aka Noya & Tanaka) and he most certainly does not want a call from them from jail. Again.

He takes on lots of troublemakers from the streets and teaches them how to take care of themselves without resorting to…. TOO MUCH violence. He also helps them get jobs (legal or not… a job is a job…)

Seijoh

Head of the Family: Oikawa Torū

He looks too young and pretty to be a boss, and since he’s pretty chipper all around a lot of people don’t take him seriously. His threats sound more like friendly suggestions. But anyone who he threatens feels threatened because standing just behind Oikawa’s shoulder is Iwaizumi: black suit, dangerous scowl, glint of a knife and a gun as he puts one hand on his hip and pushes his jacket back just enough. And everyone knows that if they don’t deliver, they’ll have Iwaizumi to deal with. 

Oikawa can make decisions too hastily sometimes, accidentally killing someone before they deserve it. Iwaizumi is the one that has to calm him down and explain to him that it was necessary. 

He thinks all black clothing can be too depressing, so he wears white and blue/green suits and makes everyone else do it too with little pops of color. When Oikawa first suggested this, everyone pretended to hate it, but they eventually they all came around to love it. 

When Kyotani came around, Oikawa almost kicked him out or stabbed him himself because Kyotani was such a twit. But Oikawa had Iwaizumi put him in line and Kyotani became a wonderfully valuable member which Oikawa now uses for special missions: i.e. difficult assassins or jobs which require absolute stealth. 

Fukurodani

Head of the Family: Bokuto Kotaro

Bokuto’s family is known around the parts to be a powerhouse and someone not to mess around with. He became Boss by accident - the last boss pulled a gun on him when Bokuto refused to do something senseless, fight ensued, and Bokuto accidentally killed him and became boss. 

Bokuto is the boss, but Akaashi is the one who pulls most of the strings. Bokuto tells him literally everything, and asks his opinion on everything before ever making a decision because he knows Akaashi probably knows more than he’s letting on and is much more clever than himself (but he doesn’t care, it just means that Bokuto doesn’t have to shoulder the weight all by himself)

He hates having to kill people, especially if he has to do it himself. He’ll get really really upset about it and retreats to his room, sometimes not washing the blood stains from his hands for hours or even days, refusing to see anyone. Until Akaashi gently talks his way inside, cleans his hands, tells him it’s okay it was a necessity and comforts him until he’s back to himself.

Nekoma

Head of the Family: Kuroo Tetsuro (Lev calls him Big Cat - much to his disdain)

As one of many bosses in the middle of Tokyo, he has it rough. Constant turf wars, fighting to get his products out to as many people as possible.

Doesn’t help that he also feels like he babysits a bunch of children, because there’s always something happening with the newbie, Lev, and between the older member, Yaku or Yamamoto making a ruckus again somewhere. 

Kuroo has ears everywhere, has his members listening/scouting out for any new info and looking for any signs of threat or danger around his territory. He will also make sure to get rid of anything or anyone that has even a slight chance of hurting his family. He fights back with intense, immense pressure. He’ll seek out the threat giver and beat the ever loving shit of them, using brass knuckles and a signet ring with a little cat on it to let EVERYONE know… don’t fuck with the cats.

If the threat continues, he’ll kill them, no mercy. No kindness. They might not even know they’re dead until they meet the devil. 

[bezzuba]

listen…as much as i love the third film for what it did, i have many, many qualms about its decisions regarding toothless’ character. now, it’s super late and i am super tired and not well-articulated atm but i gotta talk about these things lest i forget to do so later on so here we go! spoilers under the cut.

( many of the things i have to say in the following paragraphs affect the way i understand and hence write toothless as a character, but if you like this film a lot and don’t wanna hear anything negative about it, maybe just skip over this post because my language gets fairly critical. )

before i get into this shit i just wanna say that i love the light fury. i love how pointedly unacclimatised she is to humans and i love how her actions and behaviour consistently portray that. i love her but i don’t love how she was placed in the film as, in the words of many, “toothless’ girlfriend” rather than an individual character of her own right. dean or whatever can talk all they want about how she’s supposed to represent “a call to the wild” because lmao i don’t really buy it. it was so deeply buried beneath all the romantic and sexual subtexts that i just couldn’t and can’t see it.

ANYHOW i already wasn’t expecting much when they talked about toothless “getting a girlfriend” but goddang heck i was somehow still let down anyway?? the way they handled EVERYTHING — from toothless’ interest in the light fury to his reactions to some of her actions — was just. so out of place and off.

i can get behind a curious interest in the familiar unknown and even a drive to propagate to ensure his species’ survival, but that obsessive fixation on one (1) light fury??/? /? to the point where he doesn’t react negatively AT ALL when she literally throws his soulmate off his back??? ? ? like….dude…..idk about you but if anyone were to endanger the life of my soulmate whom i treasure and love, sexual / romantic partner or not, i’d be pretty fucking pissed.

AND I FEEL LIKE IT’D BE EVEN WORSE WITH DRAGONS?? they’re territorial animals and if you attack a dragon’s other half ( if toothless really does consider hiccup his soulmate as dreamwo.rks canonically states + we have seen him showcase in the first two films, i can’t imagine why soulmates wouldn’t be a thing in dragon culture ) without provocation, you can bet your dumb arse that they have all the hecking rights to attack you back on their soulmate’s behalf.

i’m not saying that toothless should’ve or would’ve attacked the light fury when she threw HALF OF HIM into the sea ( because hiccup probably wouldn’t have wished for that to happen and toothless would’ve respected those wishes ), but like. the moment she does that? he throws a goddamn FIT. just a lot of screeching and snarling and “THAT IS HALF OF ME!! YOU WOULD KILL HALF OF ME???”. any interest in her as a mate or flock-member or friend or whatever is completely diminished. i’m not brave enough to say that he would resent her but yeah, he would resent her. at least up until she apologises + tries to make amends.

he absolutely does NOT continue to earnestly chase after her. maybe he would if hiccup insisted and encouraged him to ( “she’s another fury! like YOU! go after her!!” ), but like…..he wouldn’t do it because he wants to.

i can’t remember if there were any other times where she directly endangered hiccup’s life because i’m tired and also because toothless reacted so mildly throughout most of the film, but like. same sentiment.

but stingray, you cry, wouldn’t the fact that she’s a light fury matter to toothless? yeah, i say: yeah, sure, but only in circumstances where she hasn’t committed a big, grievous no-no in dragon society. and it definitely isn’t her fault for doing what she thought was right and natural — toothless is most likely the only dragon alive with a viking soulmate — but it doesn’t excuse the fact that she did it.

does toothless hate, mourn, or is otherwise dissatisfied with the fact that he’s the only night fury in his nest? probably, yes; i just wish they could’ve explored that concept + the idea of toothless encountering another dragon like him after years of being the Only One in a way that wasn’t so contradictory + insulting to the relationship they carefully established and developed over the course of ten years.

another thing that was very weird for me to see was how quickly toothless seemed to disregard hiccup’s absence??? like somehow toothless wouldn’t be just as affected by the notion of leaving him as hiccup is? the only explanation i can think of to justify that is like. maybe he doesn’t actually ever think of leaving hiccup behind? it’s literally unthinkable — it never crosses his mind as an option or a choice. he’ll go after this dragon who is so much like him but not; this dragon who is more dragon than he can claim to be; this dragon who reminds him of what once was and what will never again be; but he won’t go WITH her. because she isn’t home. she isn’t half of me.

i admit that this hc falls apart pretty quickly in the face of the film’s goodbye scene though. it was absolutely heartwrenching to see but again, toothless was so…..mild and understanding and accepting and while that isn’t necessarily a bad thing ( it’s very mature of him, in fact ), it was odd af because we don’t once get to see him grieve. we see hiccup grieve and come to terms with it but we don’t see toothless going through the same process, and the picture it all paints is, again, so contradictory + insulting to the bond they share.

so like….fuck that lmao toothless would’ve abso-hecking-lutely protested. would’ve played it off as a joke. would’ve gotten angry, would’ve gotten desperate, would’ve denied the necessity of leaving and physically splitting that bond even though he himself at his very core understands it perfectly. he leaves eventually, as do all the other dragons, but it’s not the rushed departure we see in the film. it takes days. maybe weeks. just. a lot of time is spent clinging to and hesitating and stalling under the guise of helping the humans recover from grimmel’s assault + helping the humans build new berk before the jig is up. before berk’s collective heart can’t take it anymore and the dragons are. gently pushed. “it’s time. you know it. we know it. it’s time…and that’s okay.”

in addition to these questionable character decisions, i really do not like how they claimed toothless was the king of dragons and then not show him actually, y’know, being one?? sure, there’s that scene in the hidden world where all the dragons roar and acknowledge toothless as their alpha / king ( which is a super weird concept in itself considering they’re not actually part of his flock? i’m just. gonna say that they were paying obeisance to him because he’s AN alpha, not necessarily THEIR alpha ) but that doesn’t count because it doesn’t show WHY he’s being acknowledged as so. what has he done to continue deserving this title, to continue deserving this respect? there are undoubtedly many duties and responsibilities that come with being an alpha, but we don’t get to see him fulfil any of them outside of “scold misbehaving flock-member for comedic effect”; and that’s a huge shame because there were so many opportunities where we could’ve seen him in action!!

e.g. i’m sure that dragons who’ve suffered trauma / abuse from the hands of humans do not integrate into the dragon-human nest easily. maybe we could’ve been shown toothless calming one such dragon down, or toothless mediating a fight between a human-averse dragon and a human-bonded one, or literally ANYTHING that involves toothless dealing with a reminder that not all dragon-to-human and human-to-dragon interaction is meaningful or wholesome. it would’ve fit in so well with the whole “humans aren’t ready for dragons” theme, too!!

god this post has gotten super long but you’re in for a big surprise if you think i’m done!

ANOTHER thing that didn’t sit well with me at all was that bit when toothless ordered his ENTIRE??? FLOCK???? ?? to desist and surrender to the warlords ( or whatever they’re called ) when grimmel threatened to kill the light fury. like. would’ve been a great power move if he wasn’t the alpha who’s supposed to be protecting them all but he IS!! he IS the alpha who’s supposed to be protecting them all, he IS the dragon whose first and foremost duty is TO HIS FLOCK-MEMBERS.

god drea.mworks really be out here throwing the terms “alpha” and “king” around like toothless didn’t have to fight for them. like he doesn’t have to CONTINUE fighting for them. he doesn’t have the call of a red death, nor the call of a bewilderbeast. i’m pretty sure that after all the shit his flock has gone through with previous Bad leaders, they won’t tolerate another. toothless really has to DESERVE that title for him to continue keeping it. he has to actually be such a good alpha that nobody questions his judgement, which probably-definitely-absolutely means putting his flock-members before anyone else.

so like. grimmel threatening the light fury would NOT have toothless subjecting his flock to captivity. it would have him pretty conflicted, yeah, but like….there’s no contest. she’s not a part of his flock. and even if she was, she’s one dragon out of many. she’s not the last of her kind either, not like toothless is.

but stingray, you cry, didn’t grimmel say that night furies mate for life? wouldn’t that have had any bearing on toothless’ decision? and maybe you’re right, maybe that would have influenced toothless’ decision in the end, but i really, really don’t think it would’ve mattered. first off, we can’t tell if grimmel actually witnessed that interesting tidbit occur in real life or if he forced it to become true when he, y’know, decimated the night fury population. secondly, the movie very likely means ‘love’ when it says ‘mate’ because i imagine that, what with the existence of soulmates + the typical non-human outlook on procreation, mating is actually a very clinical, matter-of-fact process for dragons. so maybe grimmel meant to say that night furies love for life, which is all very good for the light fury if she is toothless’ One And Only but the thing is?? she’s not?? that’s hiccup, babes!! definitely not in the romantic sense, but hiccup is toothless’ One And Only through and through.

SO BASICALLY i don’t think toothless would have prioritised the wellbeing of one potential mate over those of his entire flock’s, just like how he doesn’t prioritise his other half’s or his own happiness over the safety of his entire flock in the ending. for real, if toothless wasn’t the nest’s alpha, he 100% would have stayed back on new berk with hiccup. but he is, so he leaves even though it kills him to do so.

there’s probably a lot of other things i’ve forgotten to address, but this post is long enough and i am super duper tired so…tl;dr:

the light fury’s great i love her

toothless doesn’t really

he honestly doesn’t want anything to do with her after her punting stunt with hiccup

would only chase after her if hiccup ( and others, but mostly hiccup ) told him to

toothless never actually has any intention of leaving hiccup

until the whole grimmel incident passes and even then, he really super does not want to

toothless is an alpha and he hecking acts like it which means no light fury > his entire flock

that one’s gonna be a bit hard to work around plot-wise but we’ll figure it out somehow

my portrayal of toothless is canon-divergent as heck yeehaw

[hyunllx]

i want a dark descendants. i want it to expose how truly awful the isle is. i dont want it sugarcoated. you have these horrendous people, you have cunning vicious animals/creatures, all living among each other fighting over literal scraps for years. this is why loyalty is key. why it matters. uma has turf. she has all of it. its power + protection in that hellscape. imagine a hardened uma, harry, and crew. their lives have been awful - theyre after bloodlust ("kill the beast!"). and (1/3)

2/3 theyre the only ones with the power and resources to take him down. but hes not on the throne. ben has been king for 10 years now along with that traitor (backstabber, if you ask uma) mal and the waters have been calm for so long, nary a sound from the isle. but theyve got a plan thats been building. uma the leader, captain, the strategist. her tongue is as sharp as her sword. the best fighter around with merblood running through her veins. she's got the seagods on her side. harry the first

3/3 mate, her right hand man, and secret fwb oop secrets out. loyal to uma, a little unhinged, unpredictable, his skills are strong but not as strong as hers. he makes up for it in tenacity. sword and hook in hand he can outmatch nearly anyone. gil, second in command. what he lacks in brains he makes up for in brawn. hes got a vendetta nearly as personal as uma's. the beast left his father a mess and seeing beastie boy living the life *he* should be living fueled his need for revenge for years.

Absolutely but consider this: Dark Descendants exposing how truly awful THE HEROES are.

Seriously, I need this. Show me Beast and Belle bribing or blackmailing a sorcerer into performing necromancy. Show me the royal armies marching through villages, forcibly collecting former followers of villains who had been dead for years, and locking them away for crimes they weren’t even guilty of. Show me Beast outlawing helping the Isle, threatening to send ANYONE who DARES help them imprisonment there. Show me the decree stating the Isle will only get literal waste and garbage for food and other basic necessities. Show me villains and their followers literally BEGGING the crown to let their newborns cross the barrier and the king and queen outright REFUSING. (They already do this indirectly, but I want it explicitly stated) Show me the fact that Auradon lacks an incredible amount of diversity while the vast majority of poc come from the Isle. Show me the otherkin population after they’re forced to be human-passing. Just show me how fucking awful those who are in power really are.

In contrast: Show me the child abuse. Show me the extortion, the drug epidemic, the murders, the rapes. Show it all. I know kids in real life that could honestly have come from the Isle. They’re fucked up. SHOW US THAT.

[glittergummicandypeach]

If You Can’t Blame the Confederacy, Secede! | Abbeville Institute

American political theater has become the most entertaining show in town. Trump refuses to shake hands and Pelosi rips up his script.

This is red meat for the duly indoctrinated in the mainstream political parties, but in case you thought that Trump’s impeachment and subsequent acquittal would calm the waters and draw the final curtain on a five-month Greek comedy, the woke lunatics and their Girondist media allies have decided the show must go on.

And who can we blame? Why the Confederacy, of course, the fly in the ointment of good American government. If it wasn’t for those dastardly traitors of 1861 and their political progeny, America would be a glorious City Upon a Hill.

CNN’s John Harwood seems to think something nefarious is afoot from below the Mason Dixon:

While he clearly doesn’t know basic American geography or history, he certainly knows that the Confederacy is behind whatever problems ail America. How could these modern Confederates be so blind to the necessity of John Bolton’s important testimony, the same John Bolton whom leftists consistently called an untrustworthy warmonger until he had some dirt on Trump? They held the right opinion of Bolton before the show required a plot twist making the enemy of their enemy their friend. Except every viewer knew the end of the story before it showed up on the small screen. These people telegraph their punches like a drunk itching for a bar fight.

But Harwood’s geographic determinism thinly veils his real motivation: these Republicans who voted against his wishes are racist just like their ancestor traitors to the United States. And people wonder why Southerners still cling to the War, God, and guns.

The left won’t let them forget, except if they want to pack up or demolish a few hundred statues and remove the Confederate flag from every public space in the South.

“Hey deplorable, the War is over, except when we say it isn’t over.”

Of course, we all know that an independent South would be a vastly different country than the United States. The late Bill Cawthon did a splendid job explaining how several years ago.

And some leftists get it. The failed impeachment process has brought these woke secessionists out of the closet:

I’m all for it. “Jesusland” would be a pretty nice place to live and would be freed from the burden of being constantly overruled by some Yankee self-righteous do-gooder. It does, however, makes you wonder if “kim” realized that Trump is a byproduct of the U.S. of Canada? Maybe all these loving people north of the border are just bombastic jerks after all. Nah. That would make them Yankees, and Yankees are supposed to be the good guys.

Several hundred thousands dead Southerners would tell a different story, but what do they know? They were the ones who had the backbone to let the North go in peace in 1861 if they just sent the bluecoats back over the Mason Dixon. They tried “Jesusland” but were blown to pieces by Lincoln’s cannons. If they had their way, “kim” would already be living in a separate country.

And while the founding generation worried about the prospect of secession, very few would have wanted to go to war to prevent it. Patriots don’t kill other patriots, especially those who understood that self-determination is the bedrock of the American political tradition.

So who are the real traitors to America again?

Is Davis a Traitor? Or Was Secession a Constitutional Right Previous to the War of 1861? Albert Taylor Bledsoe, author, Brion McClanahan and Mike Church, editors Published a year after the war, it provides the best argument every assembled in one book for the constitutional right of secession. Everyone interested in the overall design of the Constitution ratified by the several States in 1788 should read this book.

Patrick Henry-Onslow Debate: Liberty and Republicanism in American Political Thought Lee Cheek, Sean R. Busick, Carey Roberts, editors A public debate carried on by President John Quincy Adams and Vice President John C. Calhoun under the pen names of “Patrick Henry” and “Onslow.” This important, but little known debate, about the limits of federal power is arguably more salient now than when it occurred.

Defending Dixie: Essays in Southern History and Culture Clyde Wilson A Collection of insightful essays on how Southerners think of themselves in the light of how they are perceived by outside cultural elites.

The Enduring Relevance of Robert E. Lee: The Ideological Warfare Underpinning the American Civil War Marshall DeRosa DeRosa uses the figure of Robert E. Lee to consider the role of political leadership under extremely difficult circumstances, examining Lee as statesman rather than just a military leader and finds that many of Lee’s assertions are still relevant today. DeRosa reveals Lee’s awareness that the victory of the Union over the Confederacy placed America on the path towards the demise of government based upon the consent of the governed, the rule of law, and the Judeo-Christian American civilization.

The Founding Fathers Guide to the Constitution Brion McClanahan An article by article and clause by clause analysis of the Constitution ratified by the founding generation of 1787 and 1788, a Constitution quite different from what the political class in Washington understands.

The Morality of Everyday Life: Rediscovering An Ancient Alternative to the Liberal Tradition Thomas Fleming Fleming (editor of Chronicles, A Magazine of American Culture) explains how the morality embedded in the ideology of liberalism leads to the decadence of morality in contemporary American society.

Forgotten Conservatives in American History Clyde Wilson and Brion McClanahan A study of thinkers who exemplify conservatism in a Jeffersonian idiom rather than a Hamiltonian.

In Search of the City on a Hill: The Making and Unmaking of an American Myth Richard Gamble A history of the "city on a hill" metaphor from its Puritan beginnings to its role in American "civil religion" today.

James Madison and the Making of America Kevin Gutzman Judged by Clyde Wilson to be the "standard" on Madison for sometime.

Nullification: How to Resist Federal Tyranny in the 21st Century Thomas Woods A readable, comprehensive treatment of the constitutionality of State interposition and nullification. Should be in the hands of every State legislator.

Nullification: A Constitutional History, 1776-1833. Vol. 1: James Madison, Not the Father of the Constitution W. Kirk Wood

Nullification, A Constitutional History, 1776-1833. Vol. 2: James Madison and the Constitutionality of Nullification, 1787-1828 W. Kirk Wood In this thoroughly researched and magisterial two volume work, Wood shows how nullification was an “American” constitutional principle (essential to republicanism), and not merely a Southern sectional one. And he explains how and why republicanism has been suppressed.

Rethinking the American Union for the 21st Century Donald Livingston Essays raising the question of whether the United States has become simply too large for self-government and should be divided into a number of Unions of States as Jefferson thought it should. (The book is signed by Livingston who wrote the "Introduction" and contributed an essay).

The Broken Circle David Bridges A historical novel (as close to historical detail as a novel can be), about Major James Breathed, an officer of horse artillery for JEB Stuart. Classically educated, deeply religious, and preparing for a career in medicine when his country was invaded, he reluctantly became a fierce warrior. He was wounded several times fighting from the very beginning to the end, in 71 battles. The Sons of Confederate Veterans recently awarded him the Medal of Honor.

Superfluous Southerners, Cultural Conservatism and the South, 1920-1990 John J. Langdale, III Explores the "traditionalist" conservatism that originated with John Crowe Ransom, Donald Davidson, and Allen Tate and continued with their intellectual descendants, Cleanth Brooks, Richard Weaver, and Melvin Bradford.

A Cautious Enthusiasm: Mystical Piety and Evangelicalism in Colonial South Carolina Samuel C. Smith Smith shows how Evangelical revivalism in the colonial South Carolina low country had origins in Roman Catholic mysticism, Huguenot Calvinists and German pietism. This disposition, usually identified only with Evangelicals, touched even high Anglicans and Catholics making possible a bond of low country patriotism in the Revolutionary era.

Fiddler of Driskill Hill David Middleton A collection of this prize winning poet’s work set in his home region of rural Louisiana, a place which views the world from a conservative, southern agrarian perspective. The fiddler is a figure of the traditionalist southern-agrarian artist.

Bourbon and Kentucky: A History Distilled Explores how distilling originated in Kentucky with it’s first settlers in 1775, and takes the viewer to the sites of Central Kentucky’s earliest distilling operations. Magnificent portraits and landscapes adorn the production.

The Southern Cross: The Story of the Confederacy’s First Battle Flag Chronicles the history of the design and creation of a flag that became the prototype for the famous Confederate battle flags. The hand-stitched silk flag with gold painted stars was borne by the Fifth Company of the Washington Artillery of New Orleans through the Battles of Shiloh and Perryville. The flag was designed and made for the army after the first battle of Manassas as a military necessity and wholly without the authority or even the knowledge of the Confederate government. Mary Henry Lyon Jones of Richmond, Virginia stitched the flag together. After Generals P.G.T. Beauregard and Joseph E. Johnston approved Ms. Jones’s flag, sewing circles of more than four hundred women in Richmond sewed 120 flags made from Ms. Jones’s original design.

Jefferson Davis: An American President The first and definitive documentary film on the entire life of patriot and president, Jefferson Davis. Across three beautifully shot and edited episodes, the full spectrum of Davis’ life comes into view: from his frontier origins and service to the United States as military officer, congressman, secretary of war, and two-term senator from Mississippi; to his rise and fall as Confederate President; through his unlawful two year imprisonment after the War; and finally covering his 25 years as a man struggling to find his place in a world in which it was no longer clear what it meant to be an American.

This content was originally published here.

[prodigialis-blog1]

a meta on hange’s personality, anger, and conscious use of personas.

     note: as you see in the title, i’m going to use the word “personas” in this meta to refer to the different aspects of hange’s personality and how they consciously emphasis some aspects over others to the point where sets of traits can be given their own names. note that this is not similar to alters and does not imply any kind of dissociative disorder. hange is not dissociative, and they don’t have “alternate personalities” -- instead, they consciously choose to act a certain way in some situations over others, and will switch between different dominant personality traits as suits them. so yeah, just know that when i use the term “persona,” i’m not implying any kind of dissociation or other related pathologies.

okay, so. the purpose of this meta isn’t so much to explore hange’s personality itself (though that will happen by necessity), but rather to discuss how, why, and to what extent they manipulate their personality, both as a leading strategy and as a personal coping mechanism.

the first thing i want to make clear is that hange is not oblivious. now, this isn’t a universal statement -- they can be oblivious to many things, especially if they’re in what i’ll call full-on “science mode”; when they get carried away, they somewhat lose their ability to empathize with others, and they don’t fully process other people’s reactions. their tunnel vision when it comes to experimentation and discovery does make them oblivious to more than it should. but. what i mean here, for the purpose of this discussion, is that hange is self-aware. they know exactly what kind of personality they present to the world, and they know how others perceive it. their enthusiastic, eccentric personality isn’t the result of an absent mind that doesn’t comprehend the effect it has on others. they are fully aware of most of their different personality traits, and of the capacity for those traits to shift or overwhelm one another.

that’s an important preface to this conversation, because i don’t want people assuming that hange doesn’t understand how they affect others or to what extent their mood swings take them. they do. in fact, for this headcanon to have any traction, they have to.

so here’s the thing.

hange is an angry person. we know this. they admit to eren that they used to be fueled by hatred and resentment. and that anger still comes out, sometimes dangerously so -- threatening pastor nick, torturing sannes, yelling at roy. the anger isn’t gone. it will never be gone. they will always be an angry person. 

but they’ve decided that anger and hatred and resentment isn’t the right way to live.

it was a conscious choice. they were fueled by hatred for a long time. then, when they kicked the titan’s head, when they began thinking about how it didn’t make sense for titans to be so lightweight, when they remembered how little anyone knew about the titans, and how little anyone cared to find out, they realized that hatred wouldn’t teach them anything. hatred just led to death. doing nothing but killing titans would never help them learn, and hange became increasingly certain that they could never defeat the titans until they understood them. 

if anger and hatred didn’t work, what would?

curiosity. fascination. energy. excitement.

and the thing is, hange had and has the capacity for all of those things. their enthusiasm is not an act. they genuinely are a friendly and energetic person -- or, at least, they have the strong capacity to be, and they choose to act on that capacity. none of their personality traits are faked. none of their personas are false. that’s a really important thing to understand. hange is never faking their personality. but they are choosing to portray certain aspects of who they are above others, and choosing to keep other thoughts and emotions to themself. 

they work hard to be curious, fascinated, energetic, excited. they make an effort to hold on to that portion of their personality, and to let it take the reins, above the anger, above the hatred, above the coldness.

i’m going to posit four “base personalities” for hange here -- and what i mean by that is, four combinations of personality traits that can be expressed by them, and have been to varying degrees throughout their life. (we all have these, by the way -- to you guys, i might be “friendly writer who likes to analyze characters,” to my professors i might be “intellectual who speaks up in class,” to someone else i might be “awkward quiet one who keeps to themself with their nose in a book,” you get the idea. i’m referring to the different sides of your personality that others might pick up on in different situations -- all genuine, but all distinct.)

the four are these: angry soldier, collected leader, enthusiastic eccentric, and ruthless scientist.

angry soldier and ruthless scientist are what they try the hardest not to be, though those parts of their personality always come through to certain degrees in some situation or another. collected leader is the level, focused hange the corps tends to see during crises and battles. enthusiastic eccentric is the persona they project most commonly, the personality they determinedly cling to to avoid falling into anger or ruthlessness.

angry soldier is what they were once, killing titans without remorse or objective beyond revenge and hatred. this anger is what tends to come through whenever someone stands in their way, whenever someone blatantly destroys or obstructs knowledge, whenever someone hurts someone they care about, whenever someone refuses to fight for what is right. this anger is never quite gone from them, and they know this. sometimes they allow themself to express it behind closed doors. sometimes they actively allow themself to use it -- as with pastor nick, before they controlled themself and threw him back onto the wall. but they try to be careful with it, because they know how all-encompassing anger can be, and they’ve lost themself to it before.

collected leader is much less of an act than enthusiastic eccentric is; it’s the businesslike personality they fall into when they need to focus on something serious. granted, sometimes they have to work to maintain this mindset -- when they become commander, for example, commander becomes something of a persona in itself, because they actively restrain their scientific tendencies in order to focus on leading. but this seriousness, this calm ability to assess and respond to situations, is an intrinsic part of their personality, and often what you’d find if you stripped away their bubbly enthusiasm.

enthusiastic eccentric is also a natural part of their personality, but it’s also a part they’ve chosen to emphasize and magnify in order to block out their tendency for anger. they think it’s important for their sanity to be cheerful whenever they can (and also good for their subordinates to have a superior who can remain optimistic). they want to be friendly and energetic. and most of all they want to hold onto and cultivate their curiosity, their fascination, their drive for knowledge. allowing themself to fully embrace this part of their personality keeps them from sinking into resentment and melancholy, keeps them thinking, helps them retain their ability to make connections with other people, and, perhaps most importantly, keeps them open-minded.

a small digression here, while we’re talking about this persona: hange hates titans. they will always hate titans for the friends titans have killed, the lives titans have destroyed, the way titans keep them trapped and stagnant. but they try not to. hating titans got them nowhere. they need to try something else. understanding titans, pitying titans, being fascinated by titans, even trying to see if titans can learn or be befriended. they make themself view titans with as open a mind as they can, and because of this they’re often branded a “titan lover,” a “titan-loving freak,” what have you, by other soldiers and civilians alike. they’re okay with this. it’s worth it if it means they can learn from the titans. it’s all part of this persona. but underneath it all, they still hate titans. never think that they don’t.

ruthless scientist is, perhaps, the part of hange that they fear the most, especially when coupled with angry soldier. it is also, unfortunately, the one that blends most easily with enthusiastic eccentric -- the persona that hange uses the most. sometimes it’s hard for them to notice when they’re slipping from one to the other. sometimes they don’t realize until it’s too late. this is where they’re willing to do anything, hurt anyone, go to any lengths to gain knowledge. this is where they lose their empathy, lose their ability to see anything but their end goal. at its most extreme, this hange would let someone die just to record information about the manner of their death. this hange would torture a person into insanity to get the knowledge they need. this hange is dangerous.

this hange obviously plays a part in the torturing sannes and dangling pastor nick over the wall scenes, though in those it’s heavily mixed with their anger. that’s the thing: ruthless scientist hange can be prompted by and mingle with angry hange, but they aren’t inherently related. ruthless scientist hange acts not because they’re angry, but because they’re fascinated. ruthless scientist hange is the hange who wanted to let eren fuse completely with his titan just so they could see if he’d be able to come back. ruthless scientist hange had moblit sketch a picture of eren’s gruesome, skeletal face, completely caught up in scientific interest, with no thought to either eren’s own suffering or to mikasa’s horror. 

notice that, above, i said that hange fears this persona. i’m going to talk more about that in another meta, where i analyze the whole sannes scene, but just be aware that, yes, hange is frightened of their capacity for cruelty, and part of the reason they project their enthusiastic eccentric persona so adamantly is because they’re always wary of what they could become if they lose their capacity for joy, friendliness, excitement.

 we can see moments in the manga where hange makes conscious efforts to redirect their personality. isayama tends to indicate it by having hange raise and lower their goggles: raised goggles indicates that hange’s unleashing their anger, generally. my favorite example of this is when eren comes upon them after they’ve just kicked over a table after the sannes ordeal, and there’s a pause where they freeze, collect themself, very deliberately lower their goggles, and then quite clearly put on their eccentric persona for eren’s benefit, to hide the fact that they’ve just given over to their anger for a moment. it’s such a deliberate moment, and it really shows how much thought and effort goes into hange’s moderation of their personality:

anyway. i could certainly write more, but i’m going to cut it sort for now, and just offer this last thought: this isn’t always going to come up in the way i portray hange. sometimes they will show a deliberate change or reining in of their personality in posts -- but often they won’t. often they’ll be their general, cheerful, eccentric self, and the narrative won’t question that, because that’s just who they are at the moment -- but even if it doesn’t appear explicitly, this habit of theirs, of moderating their own personality and how they allow themselves to be perceived by others, always exists.