#Nobody tell the twitter fans I’m here please

[frankluvrr69]

holding ur hand and running through a flowerfield together . let us be free of the horrific twt users

fuck yeah 🔥 me and you against the world

[logansargeantsbabymom]

Lonely Christmas

Lando Norris x Fem!Reader

summary: Lando and Y/N decide that they want to play a prank on their fans and the rest of the grid by hinting at breaking up over X (twitter)

warnings: Cursing & “Cheating”

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“hey babe, I have an idea.” I said with a smirk as I plopped myself on the bed next to my Formula 1 race winner boyfriend, Lando Norris.

“Oh no, this doesn’t sound good” Lando says chuckling as he props himself on his elbow to get a better view of me, before leaning down pressing a quick kiss to my lips

“mm, I think we should prank your fans and the grid.” I said with the biggest smile I’ve ever smiled in my life.

“and how do you suppose we do that, hmm?” Lando said, his eyes flickering between my eyes and my lips.

Sitting up and criss cross apple sauce, I stare into his soul “I think we should stage a twitter breakup,” I searched his face for some type of answer

“What? Is this a way of telling me you want to breakup without telling me you want to breakup?” He looks kinda hurt, which quickly prompts me to swing my legs over his body so i’m sitting on his lower torso.

“Absolutely not baby! i love you beyond the galaxy. I just think this would be funny,” i plead but Lando looks unsure “I’ll tell you what to say and all !”

“fine, but only if you let me eat you out, BUT you have to sit on my face” Lando knows I’m insecure about my weight and crushing him to death.

“oh! fine!!” I say plopping right off his body and landing on the bed with a huff. “so i’m gonna tweet something to indicate that we’re breaking up but not actually saying anything”

“and how are you gonna do that-” I quickly interrupt him

“make me cry” i say nonchalantly

“what?” Lando’s face reads 50 shades of Stunned “no, I promised you and your family that the one thing i’d NEVER do to you is make you cry.”

Hearing Lando admit that means the world to me, but i need him to stop being nice and make me cry. It doesn’t take much for me to cry and since Lando doesn’t want to make me cry, I’ll resort to the next best thing: thinking of my (very much alive) dog die.

Just a few seconds of thinking of my (breed/dog) die, the tears well up in my eyes and I let out a choked sob, before whipping my phone out and taking a picture before posting it on twitter with the caption

"nobody wants a lonely Christmas but I'm about to call it quits with you. Breaking up is at the top of my wishlist and baby you don't have a clue."

I flip my phone to show Lando with a smirk plastered on my face. "So, what'd ya think?" I question as I post it and wait a few seconds before twitter starts going absolutely nuts. " wait wait let me read you some of the comments I'm getting, 'slut4ln' says 'NO MOM AND DAD PLEASE STOP FIGHTING' haha look, here's another 'mother/n' said 'mother always knows wtf is up, Lando Norris count your days' !!" the chuckles leaving my lips are loud

"I think that I don't know how to respond to that on twitter," Lando says with a faint chuckle "here, how about you take my phone, type out what you want me to say and then let me read it before posting it." a smirk evident on his face as he hands me his phone, before putting said hand on my thigh, rubbing it up and down.

"What about this...?" I question as I'm typing

"You say our relationships fading and you've been thinking bout leaving and though I know it's the truth I just don't want to believe it. You've gotta be kidding me, are we really breaking up? We just picked out a tree, damn."

"Okay Y/N/N lets give it a second to spread, we have to get juicy comments before we keep going, oh. never mind. George is texting me asking me what the fuck I did and why am I arguing twitter about it"

"fuck it, ignore him. we need to make this believable." I say swiping George's message away. "Opinion on this?"

"wait wait, let me tweet something else before you tweet y/n/n. Here, read this"

"You haven't even left yet and I miss you. I was looking forward to the holidays with you. How could you do this on Christmas, girl that's so malicious? C'mon baby, please don't make me beg cause I can go and date your friend instead. Yeah, I'll put the nut in meg. But If you're thinking about leaving, then I already blew it. screw it, then I guess I'll have to beat you to it, bitch."

"OKAYYYY LANDOOOO LET ME STEP UP MY GAME!!!" I scream as I finished reading his reply after he hit tweet bouncing up and down on the bed in excitement.

"okay, okay what about this for me?" I question as I finish typing, turning my phone so Lando can read what I typed.

"I tell you I love you but I don't really mean it, cause after this Christmas sorry but I'm leaving you."

"I'm starting to feel like you're just soft launching a break up with us right now" Lando says "Why else would you gave suggested a fake twitter break up?"

"Baby, please. This is just for shits and giggles. AHH OH MY GOSH!! OSCAR'S CALLING ME" I screamed in panic as I declined the call. "Lando, I think you need to eat me up in the twitter beef again, put your pretty head to work and think of some insults for me."

"I'm almost done, but first I got a question. Why is it one week before Christmas you feel the need to mention a break up with me is in the process but still pending? Is it depending on your gift and what I'm spending? Or are you fishing for more compliments? Because to my astonishment, you're acting like little kid. Was it something I said?Sometimes my head stops thinking, when I say some stupid shit to you, you know I don't mean it, it's just the season, it's confusing, can we just get along?"

"LANDO MY COMMENTS ARE GOING CRAZYYYY! LOOK" I giggle in excitement as I flip my phone so he can scroll through the comments

slut4ln: MOM AND DAD PLEASE STOP! CHRISTMAS IS RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER AND I CAN'T DEAL WITH A DIVORCE RN

georgeswhore: I wake up from a nap to SEE THESE?!?!?!?!

leclercsgf: What the absolute fuck did they fight about that THEYRE BEEFING ON TWITTER FOR AND AIRING OUT A POTENTIAL BREAKUP???

>y/nforpresident: potential? honey I think they are done

Landoslefttoe: Lando kinda ate mom up though 😭😭

LewisHamilton: Answer your fucking phones now!

CharlesLeclerc: LANDO?? YOU CALL YOUR GIRLFRIEND "BITCH"??

CarlosSainz: Cabron, call me asap and fill me in

LoganSargeant: Does this mean I actually have a chance with Y/n?

"I'm choosing to ignore Logan's comment," Lando said flipping my phone back so I could read it. "When are we gonna go public and say it was a prank?" Lando asks as he readjusts himself on the bed, pulling me down and closer to him so we're cuddling

"We can tell them all tomorrow" I yawn as I cuddle closer to my boyfriend "goodnight handsome"

"Goodnight precious" lando whispers as he kisses my temple

<333333

idk what this is but 🎀😗

@luckyladycreator2 @itsmiamalfoy @jeffs77 @ilivbullyingjeongin @forevercaffeinated-lee @daemyratwst @gulphulp @callsignwidow @f1wintermoon13 @teenwolf01 @victoriassecret101.

https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSesvRpKqBaYY-Ow5IgHoD0gSX6OzJ03qGMXOhHUI6Xg1wfKaA/viewform.

[joealwyndefenseattorney]

The projection!!!! It’s like all the Swiftie talking points of why they should hate Joe Alwyn.

why didn't he show up for taylor when she needed support?

We don’t know that he didn’t.

Why was he resentful of her success?

He was? According to whom? The voices in Swifties heads?

Why didn't he go with her to several awards shows? Including the Grammys!

Nobody knows the answer to this except the people in the relationship. I could turn it around. Why didn’t she go to Cannes for his premieres? Why didn’t she go to his premiere at TIFF or in London? Why did she do not attend his events except for ones that involved The Favourite, the award nominee? 🤔

Why did he party in her house whilst ignoring her all the time?

What??? Did you have cameras in her house? This is a Swiftie made up storyline. Plus, it was THEIR house. He lived there too. He can do whatever the hell he pleases.

Why did he want her to not be as famous as she is now while Travis is very open to it? Taylor wanted to be loved out loud but joe always seemed embarrassed by her.

Good fucking lord.

I want serious answers here, not fangirl deflections.

You should ask serious questions then instead of using Swiftie made up talking points that are based on delusions in your head. Get off tik tok and Twitter and think critically.

Why didn't he answer what his fave taylor song was?

Because it was none of our business! You don’t think Taylor knew his favorite song?

Why did it always seem like he hated us, the fans?

I WONDER WHY! Because y’all treated him so well! Like how he’s been receiving death threats for a year now, and his family was doxxed, and his female friends and co-stars have been harassed, and while with her y’all started rumors he was abusing her, and thought he was lying about being William Bowery, and wanted more and more and more content from him to be parasocial about Taylor.

Why did he interact with several of his female co stars but locked her away in the basement of his heart?

I can’t.

Or literally not see she was depressed as he left her behind at home (caging her) while he went to the bar?

I’m done. You are not serious people. Get a fucking life, stop making up stories, and be glad she now has Travvy to be a Swiftie with you all. He got out of that relationship a year ago - LEAVE HIM ALONE!

#FreeJoeAlwyn

#FuckSwifties

You tell ‘em

[youcouldmakealife]

LBTE: Jared (130-131)

In which Erin and Bryce go viral, and The Article is born.

If you'd like to follow along, series page is here.

130. Grapevine

Jared manages to get through training camp and one preseason game before Bryce’s reputation spectacularly implodes, along with his personal well-being, and Jared’s personal well-being, and the Marcus Mathesons well-being as a whole.

He was just trying to be NICE. Anyway, the First Twitter Thing. Which was needed for the Article, and The Blanket Duel, and The Other Twitter Thing. First domino falls down.

Jared shuts his eyes. “The Sun’s a right-wing rag,” he says. “Nobody with a brain believes the Sun.”

“Tons of people believe the Sun, Jared,” Bryce snaps. “A lot of Flames fans read the fucking Sun.”

Both of them are correct.

“What’s Summers say?” Jared asks.

Bryce mumbles something.

“Bryce,” Jared says.

“He left a voicemail,” Bryce mumbles. “I haven’t called him back.”

Bryce always regresses to a teenager with Dave. Dave treating him like he’s still a teenager doesn’t help that.

“Okay,” Bryce says a little more firmly. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologise for the media being fucking stupid,” Jared says.

“I’m really sorry,” Bryce says. “Jared.”

“Stop it,” Jared says. “I love you, okay? You didn’t do anything wrong. Stop apologising to me.”

It’s really important that nobody is mad at Bryce about this (I mean, other than Dave). He did a nice thing! He could not have anticipated these consequences! But man does this feel like deja vu in other ways to him, so Jared not being mad at him for even a second, and Don and Susan and Erin not blaming him, that’s honestly important.

Jared texts Greg to give him a call, ditto to Erin, who’s almost certainly still asleep, then tackles his mom first. Partly because his dad might be out on a job, more because he really, really doesn’t want to tell his dad. Hopefully his mom will do it for him.

Coward.

“Can you tell dad too?” Jared says.

“No,” mom says.

“Mom,” Jared says.

“No, you’re telling your father,” mom says.

“Please?” Jared says.

“Jared, my priority right now is to call my daughter and explain the situation to her, I don’t have the time to tell your father because you’re afraid he’s going to be mad at you,” she snaps. “Tell him yourself.”

Susan knows better than Jared that her eighteen year old daughter in a bikini hitting media is not going to lead to a good time, so her focus is pretty exclusively on letting Erin know at the moment, which I think is understandable.

“I’m not mad at you or Bryce, I’m mad at the situation,” she says, softening.

Nobody’s mad at Bryce!

“But I really do need to call Erin right now,” mom says. “And your father needs to know. And not from the Sun.”

“He doesn’t read the Sun,” Jared says.

Don has better taste than that, thank you.

His dad is like — dangerously quiet as Jared sums up the situation.

“If you haven’t called your mother yet, call her now,” he says finally, voice so even it cuts through Jared, and hangs up. Jared’s assuming the hanging up is so he doesn’t say something he regrets.

Nobody’s mad at Bryce! But Don is, you know, still currently furious.

Jared goes to make coffee, hovers over the machine until he can retrieve a cup, spends a solid ten minutes of pacing and debating whether or not he should check twitter — it’s hard not to, but he also knows it’d be a huge fucking mistake —

It would be such a huge mistake, Jared would be beside himself about the way people talk about Erin.

(His focus is pretty heavily on Bryce right now, and very tunnel-vision-y, but yeah: Erin’s half naked image is being shown without her consent, with the implication that Bryce is cheating on a spouse with her. There’s some vile shit getting said. There always is, on twitter)

Summers has an idea. It’s not a terrible one. Probably the best one available.

I mean, it probably is the best idea available, but it is also a terrible idea.

Stephen answers the door, looking concerned, which doesn’t suit his face, then even more concerned by whatever Jared’s own face is doing.

Stephen being concerned about Jared and Jared’s response is basically ‘ew what's wrong with him'.

“Hockey or Bryce?” Stephen asks.

“Bryce,” Jared says, and follows him in, sits heavily on the couch, Gabe coming in and sitting down on the other side, Stephen cramming himself in the middle. He has pointy elbows.

“I know,” Stephen says when Jared mumbles that. “I use them to get my way a lot.”

So concerned he gets right in there with the elbows. He’s about the same as Jared on the touch front (not a big hugger, will make some exceptions for loved ones, and a massive one person exception), so this is big from him.

“What particularly queer advice do you need?” Stephen says.

“Steve,” Gabe says.

“It is kind of particularly queer,” Jared says, hating the triumphant sound Stephen makes.

“Come to me with your gay problems, my child,” Stephen says.

But not so concerned he won’t crack a joke or three. (Levity is helpful, Gabriel.)

“How old is she?” Stephen asks.

“Eighteen,” Jared says.

“Oh, so older—” Stephen says.

“I am fully prepared to sleep in the guest room if you finish that sentence, Stephen,” Gabe says.

Stephen does not finish the sentence.

Not always the time for levity, STEPHEN.

“Well,” Stephen says. “This is not going to help his reputation. And it wasn’t great already.”

“Stephen,” Gabe says.

“I’m being honest!” Stephen says.

He’s not levitating this time, Gabe!

“Summers says ‘fuck’,” Jared says. “And apparently called Bryce an idiot a lot. And suggests we do a thing about how the Marcuses and Mathesons are long-time family friends, do some heartwarming feature about friendship across divisional lines or whatever, provide some pictures me and Bryce together and our families together for evidence our families have been close-knit for years. My family’s okay with it. Or like. They’re willing.”

Reminder that Gabe did a profile and REALLY didn’t hide the fact Stephen lived with him and the reporter said him and Stephen were ‘like brothers’. So they know it’ll work.

“Can I suggest something?”

Jared eyes him.

“Stop wearing your wedding ring before you do that article,” Stephen says. “And maybe for a while after.”

“No,” Jared says.

“Jared,” Stephen says.

“No,” Jared says.

Stephen blows out a breath. “You want to be stubborn and out? Because that’s how stubbornness gets you outed.”

Stephen on Jared’s shoulder, less an angel and just Jared making logical rather than emotional decisions.

“I don’t care,” Jared snaps. “I’m not going to pretend I’m not married to him.”

“You do it every day lying by omission, how is this any different in practice?” Stephen asks.

“You literally get to fucking live with your boyfriend full-time don’t you fucking dare—”

Stephen is saying things Jared objectively doesn’t disagree with but they’re landing a little too hard right now. And Jared misses his husband.

“I don’t get to live with him full-time,” Stephen says.

“Stephen,” Gabe says.

“Well, I don’t,” Stephen says, shoving off the couch and disappearing down the hall.

He IS away 41 games a year.

“I’m going to call Dave Summers,” Stephen says from the hall.

“Why?” Jared says.

“Know the business, know you both socially,” Stephen says, leaning on the door frame now. As dramatic sulks go that one didn’t last. “It’s a perspective he probably needs for the action plan.”

Stephen’s concern fights Stephen’s desire to dramatically flounce, and what wins is his shrewdness, which recognizes he can help in a way that doesn't involve antagonizing Jared into yelling at him.

“But I know you’re a stubborn ass who won’t listen,” Stephen says. “Which Summers should be aware of.”

Jared gives him the finger.

“I’m going to talk to Summers,” Stephen says, then disappears again.

“That’s Stephen for ‘sorry for being a dick, I will never actually apologise but I will try to make it up to you’,” Gabe says. “For the record.”

Accurate translation from Stephenese.

“And according to one of Stephen’s sisters you look like an angel, which doesn’t hurt with fans,” Gabe says. “You can imagine how much it pained Stephen to hear Beth say that.”

An angel is probably the most chill way Beth has described him.

“I didn’t mean that,” Gabe says. “You’re opening a door that you can’t close again. And if people start looking more closely — you guys don’t hide it well.”

~foreshadowing. Except not really because it’s just any logical person’s take after the witnessing the mess that was Jared and Bryce pretend not to be married (featuring extra eye-yearning).

“I do not offer these lightly,” Stephen says seriously. “And offering one right now does not mean this will become a trend. It will not.”

Jared blinks at him.

“Would you like a hug,” Stephen says flatly.

“Absolutely not,” Jared says, just as flat.

Stephen holds a mute arm out, and Jared sinks into it, because he kind of would, in fact, like a hug right now.

Steve hug!!!

“It’s going to work out,” Stephen tells him, the words tucked against Jared’s cheek. “It might be a bit before it is, and there might be a shitshow somewhere in there—”

“Stop helping,” Jared mumbles.

I love them both.

131. Verisimilitude

Well, they are a family, this is true. A family feeling varying degrees of unhappiness right now; dad and mom are pissed, Elaine concerned. Erin thinks it’s funny. Of course Erin thinks it’s fucking funny.

Erin having a sense of humour about this is very much for the best. Also, she's not reading the comments. Articles, yes — they’re hilarious. Comments, absolutely not.

I said the words ‘they instantly clicked’ today. Raf texts the group chat after his phone interview. I was honestly expecting God to smite me the spot.

Raf saying this while viscerally remembering Jared's tantrum about the temerity of Bryce having a whistle.

im up next in getting struck down by god Chaz says.

That’s true friendship — risking smiting for your bros.

By all accounts she’s treating it like a puff piece, not asking any leading questions, just basic ones and letting people fill in whatever, so it’s hard to tell if she honestly thinks she’s doing an article about a heart warming friendship, or if she’s figured out something’s up.

She honestly figures this is meant to get ahead of something, but her bet would have been something like Bryce IS cheating with Erin, or him being in the process of a divorce, since there’s no wife to be seen. She did not think ‘secretly married to one another’. They’re both acting weird, but she already thought something shifty was going on, and also hockey players are often awkward interviewees anyway, so.

“How’s school?” Jared says.

“Fine,” Erin says. “Only had one dude walk up and ask me if I’m Bryce Marcus’ girlfriend.”

She’s in her first month of her first year of university, this was not ideal timing. Only one dude approached her, but he's not the only one who's recognized her.

“Stephen said — you know, that there might be more attention,” Jared says. “After the article comes out. And that it might be a good idea for me to take it off for a bit.”

“I think you should do whatever you think you should do,” Bryce says.

“That’s really helpful, thanks,” Jared snaps.

“J,” Bryce says, sounding tired. “Just — it’s up to you.”

Jared twists his ring around his finger. Even from a distance you can see how similar it is to Bryce’s, and yeah, they’re traditional rings, plenty of people have the same ones, but —

“Can you help with my chain?” Jared asks, and he doesn’t know if it’s disappointment or relief on Bryce’s face, a blink and you miss it flash, before Bryce helps him undo the clasp. Jared strings his wedding ring on it, clinking against the engagement one, and ducks his head to let Bryce put it back on. Bryce presses a kiss against the nape of his neck, murmurs, “Done,” and Jared straightens up. In more ways than one, it feels like. That’s a bad joke even in his own head, all bitterness, no humour, so he doesn’t say it.

Like I said, Stephen was really only saying what Jared thought himself. This is also sort of screeching ahead out of their comfort zones right now, so a few backward shuffles are understandable.

Jared runs through the script in his head while they walk in, find the media room, wait for Weber to arrive, sitting a scrupulous two feet apart. It was more lines to take rather than an actual set script, ‘like family’ and ‘a lot in common’, ways to deflect a question without outright lying.

Andreas has worked a lot of overtime writing basically a choose your own adventure, in the form of ‘if they ask this, you may say this, this, or this, NOT this’, etc. It is exhaustive and he is exhausted.

“He’s my best friend,” Bryce says after a lot of other fluff, laying it on thick. There’s nothing but honesty in his voice as he says it, but then — he is being honest, Jared knows. It’s not the whole story, but it’s not like he isn’t Bryce’s best friend. Like Bryce isn’t his. “Some people you just know are supposed to be in your life.”

Bryce genuinely believes they were fated to be together. Jared doesn’t believe in fate, but he thinks that’s a nice thought.

“I don’t know about best,” Jared says quickly, because Bryce is getting like — too honest now, skirting towards something they shouldn’t be. “I have a lot of friends.”

“Jared,” Bryce complains.

If they’re such good friends why don’t you MARRY them, Jared.

Jared grins at his sullen face. “He’s my best friend too.”

Bryce goes pink

How. How does Bryce Marcus always do this to me. Just going about my day then boom, punched in the gut, having feelings about Bryce time.

Someone said Jared ‘gave OJ a personality’, like Julius doesn’t have one of his own, like anyone’s entitled to it. Julius has a personality. It’s a mean one: he’s been laughing his ass off about this article since Jared told him.

Love that Jared sounds super protective and supportive of Julius right before it switches to ‘yeah he has an identity, it's called being a DICK’.

“I just want my private life to stay private,” Bryce says, and this Jared thinks is actually scripted, that Summers gave him a real script, because Bryce is saying it like it’s been rehearsed. “Marriage is between two people, and it’s something that other people aren’t entitled to. I don’t really want to discuss it with the fans or the media, because it’s not really any of their business.”

So carefully factual without giving a single iota of information. Dave making sure this shit is as carefully worded as a contract.

“It’s cool,” Gabe says, shaking Jared’s shoulder. “You’re good, man.”

“Thanks,” Jared says.

“You’re good?” Gabe says, a question this time.

Jared shrugs.

“You’re good,” Gabe decides.

“Your vocabulary is extraordinary,” Jared says. “I am astonished by it.”

Jared absolutely does not get to throw stones. And I like the three goods of Gabe Markson.

Jared skates over when the Canucks start eyeing Chaz with vague suspicion.

“You good?” he asks.

“I’m good,” Jared says.

All good.

“Shrewd,” Gabe says. “Good verisimilitude. Stephen would be proud.”

Jared blinks at him.

How dare you insult Gabe's vocabulary.

“I don’t understand half the words he says,” Dmitry says consolingly.

“I understood it,” Jared says, tilting his chin up. He refuses to commiserate with Dmitry Kurmazov.

I love Jared’s petty ass.

“What’s verisimilitude mean?” Jared hisses at Gabe on the bench before the anthem.

Gabe tips back his head in a laugh and refuses to tell him.

Verisimilitude: the quality of seeming true or of having the appearance of being real. The on ice stuff had a lot more of it than the article did.

The article drops. Jared doesn’t read it, but he’s assured it’s fine. He doesn’t read replies on twitter or forums or anything. It’s not his job. He can’t focus on it.

Probably for the best Jared didn’t.

Jared doesn’t know if it’s the Calgary media, or the storyline about their families, or just Bryce being the incredibly talented player he is, but the Canucks are mortified in a 6-1 loss, and Bryce has a hat trick and a four point game. In the grand scheme of things, it’s a preseason game and means nothing. In the smaller scheme of Jared’s life, he kind of wants to throttle Bryce. And only a little bit in a sexy way. They’ll see who’s laughing when Jared rides him within an inch of his life.

Yeah Jared, that’ll show him, he’ll definitely never try to do it again after that.

Riding him until he fucking begs is now in the cards.

Oh no whatever will Bryce do. Please have mercy, Jared Matheson, he’ll do anything.

[bechloeislegit]

Stuck With You

Chloe and Chicago have been together for almost two years, and Beca believes they will announce their engagement soon. So she is surprised to get a call from Chloe asking if the couple could spend a few days with Beca. Beca agrees but soon finds things are not as rosy as she believed.

Special Note from BeChloeIsLegit: I make no secret that Chloe is my favorite Bella from the Pitch Perfect movies, and Brittany Snow, the actress who plays her, is one of my favorite people in the entertainment business. I mean, the woman does it all and looks pretty damn good doing it. So, this is for Brittany Snow in honor of her birthday (March 9). I hope you like it!

“Hey, fans, Beca Mitchell here,” Beca stated while looking into the camera. “I hope you are all doing well. I’m taping this to apologize because I have to cancel my tour. I’m truly sorry, but my doctor has put me on vocal rest due to some inflammation in my throat. Please know that I was as excited about this tour as you guys were because I had some new songs that I wanted to share with you. All I can say at this point is that as soon as my doctor gives me the all-clear, my team and I will immediately begin to get the tour back on track. Stay well, and my team or I will update you via social media. Love you, guys!”

Beca turned off the camera and uploaded the video onto her Twitter and Instagram. She sighed as she sat back and ran a hand through her hair.

It was only seconds before her phone blew up with notifications. She picked up her phone and smiled at some of the comments.

Beca nearly dropped her phone when it rang. Nobody ever calls her; most people text her. So she answered the call without checking the caller ID.

“Hello?” Beca said. 

“Beca!” Chloe squealed through the phone. “I just saw your Insta video. Are you okay? Do you need anything?”

“I’m fine, Chloe,” Beca said with a laugh. “I just need to rest my voice for a couple of weeks, and then I’ll be back in the studio and out on the road. I have more than enough of whatever I might need to help me get well. So, how about you guys? How are things in Spain?”

“Um, that’s the main reason I called,” Chloe said. “We’re in L.A. I was on my way home to spend time with my folks, and we had a stopover here.”

“Oh,” Beca said. “Are your folks okay? Why didn’t you tell me you were coming home and would be in L.A.?”

There was silence for a moment, and Beca wondered what Chloe wasn’t telling her.

“My folks are fine,” Chloe said. “I didn’t tell you about being in L.A. because I was only supposed to be here for about an hour before my plane was to leave for Portland. But, um, our plane was late, and I missed the connection. And I can’t get another flight out for a few days. Or find a  hotel room that I can afford, so I was wondering if I could come and stay with you for a day or two until I can get a new flight out?”

“Of course, you can stay with me,” Beca said. “You know you’re always welcome here. It will be good to see you.”

“I don’t want to impose, but I don’t know what else to do,” Chloe said, sounding near tears.

“Do you want me to come to pick you guys up?” Beca asked.

“No thanks, I’ll get an Uber or something,” Chloe said. 

“Okay,” Beca said. “If you’re sure.”

“I’m sure,” Chloe said. 

“Great,” Beca said. “I’ll see you guys soon.”

“Okay,” Chloe said. “Thanks for this, Beca.”

Beca ended the call and went to the kitchen to see what she could fix for dinner while she waited.

Forty-five minutes later, Beca heard a car pull into the driveway. She looked out the window to see Chloe getting out of the car.

“Chloe!” Beca squealed as she ran out to greet the redhead.

Chloe looked up and smiled, pulling Beca into a hug as soon as she reached her. Beca went to pull back and Chloe squeezed Beca harder to her.

The driver started taking the luggage from the trunk. He set everything near the steps leading up to the house as Chloe and Beca continued to hug.

After a moment, Chloe pulled back from the hug, saying, “Sorry, but I’ve really missed you.”

“That’s okay,” Beca said with a laugh. “I missed you, too.”

Beca looked around and didn’t see Chicago. 

“Where’s Chicago?” Beca asked.

“He’s on his way to Savannah to visit his folks,” Chloe said.

“Oh,” Beca said. “Let’s get you inside. I made spaghetti with meat sauce.” 

“Sounds yummy,” Chloe said, reaching for her luggage.

“Sheesh, Beale,” Beca said, laughing. “When you said you were coming home, I didn’t know you meant for good.”

“Would you like me to take the luggage inside for you?” the driver asked.

“It would be great if you could help,” Beca said, grabbing a suitcase in each hand.

“Of course,” the driver said, following Beca with two more suitcases.

“Come on, Chlo,” Beca called back over her shoulder.

“Aren’t you supposed to be resting your voice?” Chloe asked as she grabbed the last suitcase.

“Yeah,” Beca muttered as she pushed open the front door and set the bags inside.

 She stepped aside to let the driver in and told him to place his bags near the others. Chloe came in with the final bag and dropped it near the rest of her luggage.

“Thank you,” Chloe said, turning to the driver.

“You’re welcome, miss,” the man said.

“Do you need me to give him a tip?” Beca whispered to Chloe.

“I’ll do it on the app when I rate him,” Chloe whispered.

“Oh, okay,” Beca said, closing the door after noticing the man had already walked out. “Do you want to eat first or put your stuff in your room?”

“Can we eat first?” Chloe asked. “I’m starving. It was a long flight, and the food they served wasn’t all that great. Plus, I didn’t feel much like eating.” 

“Okay,” Beca said, leading Chloe into the kitchen. “We can talk and catch up while we eat.”

“Wow,” Chloe said as she entered behind Beca. “This is a gourmet kitchen. When did you start cooking? No, don’t answer that. You need to rest your voice.”

Beca went to the stove to check her spaghetti. It was a little past the al dente stage but should be fine. 

“I can talk; I just can’t talk for long periods. That being said, I’ve learned a few things about cooking in the past two years, Beale,” Beca said. “As a matter of fact, your mom gave me her lasagna recipe, and I can make it for you before you leave.”

“My mom gave you her lasagna recipe?” Chloe asked. “She never gives that recipe to anyone outside the family.”

“I guess she considers me family,” Beca said with a shrug.

“Hmph,” Chloe scoffed. “Then I guess you’d better not disappoint, Mitchell. I know my mom’s recipe, too.”

“I promise I will follow it to the letter, Beale,” Beca said.

Beca plated the spaghetti and carried the two plates to the counter. She placed one in front of Chloe and the other at her seat. 

“Would you like beer or wine with dinner?”

“Beer’s fine,” Chloe replied.

Beca reached into the refrigerator and grabbed two beers. She handed one to Chloe.

“So, um, why isn’t Chicago with you? I thought you two were going to your parents.”

“He’s on his way to Savannah,” Chloe said. “I was the only one going to Portland.”

“Okay, what’s going on with you two?” Beca asked, rubbing her throat.

“Are you okay?” Chloe asked. “Is your throat hurting? Maybe you shouldn’t talk for a while and rest your voice.”

“I will as soon as you answer the question,” Beca said.

“Nothing is going on with us,” Chloe said. 

“I’ve known you for almost ten years, Chloe,” Beca said. “I can tell when something’s bothering you. What gives?”

“You shouldn’t be talking,” Chloe said, grabbing her beer and chugging half of it. She set down the bottle, adding, “And I don’t want to talk about it.”

Beca exhaled and started to eat, glancing at Chloe between bites. 

“Stop staring at me,” Chloe said.

“I will if you tell me what’s going on with you and Chicago and why he isn’t here with you.”

“Can we talk about something else?” Chloe said, pushing her food around her plate.

“If that’s what you really want,” Beca said.

“We’re breaking up,” Chloe exclaimed, throwing her fork down on her plate. “That’s the main reason I wanted to come home.”

“What happened?” Beca asked, reaching out to take Chloe’s hand.

“Excuse me,” Chloe said, snatching her hand from Beca before standing and rushing out of the room.

Beca remained where she was with her eyebrows raised to her hairline as she watched Chloe rush out of the kitchen. 

“What the Hell was that?” Beca muttered.

After a few minutes, Beca shook her head and went to find Chloe.

~ Stuck With You ~

Beca found Chloe sitting on the floor outside the upstairs bathroom.

“Chloe?” Beca said as she eased down to sit next to her. “Are you okay? Do you want to talk about it?”

“I’m fine, and no, I don’t want to talk about it,” Chloe said, hugging her knees.

“Okay,” Beca said, wrapping her arm around Chloe’s shoulders. “I’m here when you’re ready.”

Chloe laid her head on Beca’s shoulder and wiped a tear from her eye.

“He cheated on me, Beca,” Chloe said, sniffling. “I caught him with some girl six months ago, and he swore it only happened because he was drunk and begged me to forgive him; so I forgave him. And then, two weeks ago, I came home early from a weekend getaway with some friends and caught him in our bed with another girl. I got angry and yelled at him and he said it was my fault he cheated. He only did it because I wasn’t giving him what he needed, so he had to find it elsewhere.”

“What a dick,” Beca mumbled.

“I wanted to come home because I couldn’t stand to be around him anymore,” Chloe said. “I should have left him the first time I caught him cheating, but I didn’t have any money. Then Chicago said he wanted to go home to Savannah and offered to pay my way so I could go to see my folks. I didn’t really want to travel with him, but I still didn’t have any money, and since he offered to pay for everything, I agreed.”

Chloe took a deep breath and wiped her eyes.

“The flight was horrible,” Chloe continued. “I kept talking about how excited I was to see my folks, and he kept trying to sweet talk me into going to Georgia with him. He didn’t want his folks to know he cheated and that we were breaking up. I got upset and yelled at him. And he yelled back that it didn’t matter what I wanted because he got me a ticket to Savannah, not Portland. I called him an asshole and got up. I was standing in the aisle yelling back and forth with Chicago, when a guy a few rows back from us offered to switch seats with me so I didn't have to stay next to Chicago. I took him up on it and moved. I was still seething when the plane descended into L.A. for the layover. Chicago tried to grab me as I exited the plane, but the nice guy who switched seats held him back. Finally, I was able to get off the plane. I was going to change my ticket to go to Portland, but it would cost more, and as I said, I don’t have any money. Then I saw your video and decided to call you. And now you’re stuck with me because I can’t get to Portland.”

“I thought you said you missed the connecting flight to Portland?” Beca said, furrowing her brow.

“That was a lie,” Chloe said, looking down at her hands. “I didn’t want to tell you what was really going on, so I lied, and I’m sorry about that.”

“It’s okay, I guess,” Beca said. “One question, though.”

“What is it?”

“How did you get all your luggage off the plane if you were supposed to be continuing onto Savannah?”

“Oh,” Chloe chuckled. “The stewardess saw how upset I was and sweet-talked the guys removing the luggage for everyone staying in L.A. to find and remove mine as well.”

“That sounds like something that would happen to you,” Beca said, smiling. "And I can understand why you felt the need to make up a lie. But you should know by now you can tell me anything; I will always be there for you, Chloe. Hell, I would have bought you a ticket home six months ago if you had told me about the cheating.”

“I know,” Chloe said. “And I hate to ask you this now, but can I stay here with you for a little while longer? I’m not ready to face my parents just yet. They think Chicago and I were both coming to visit.”

“You can stay as long as you like,” Beca reassured Chloe. “And I think you should call your parents and tell them the truth about you and Chicago breaking up; him buying you a ticket to Savannah, not Portland; and you not being able to get a flight because you don’t have the money. By the way, I will buy you a ticket when you’re ready to go to Portland. But please call your mom and tell her everything. You’ll feel better, and you know your mom will be glad to know you’re safe here with me.”

Beca put her hand to her throat and gently massaged it, grimacing as she did so.

Chloe grabbed Beca’s hand. “Oh, my gosh, are you okay? I shouldn’t be making you talk so much. Come on; I’ll make some hot tea with honey for your throat. It helped me when I had nodes.”

Beca let Chloe drag her back downstairs and into the kitchen.

~ Stuck With You ~

Beca went to her doctor two weeks later to have him check her throat. It was still bothering her, and she was afraid he would make her stay on voice rest for much longer; she wasn’t wrong.

Beca entered her house, frowning. Chloe was in the kitchen and heard Beca come in; she went to see what the doctor told Beca.

“My throat isn’t getting any better,” Beca said, grimacing. “I have to go on complete vocal rest. No talking, no singing, no exceptions for two weeks.”

“Why are you talking now?” Chloe asked, holding a pad and pen out toward Beca. 

Beca took the pad and looked at Chloe with a raised brow.

“Write it down and stop talking,” Chloe instructed.

Beca opened her mouth to speak, and Chloe put her hand over it to stop her.

“No talking,” Chloe said. “Doctor’s orders.”

Beca shook her head, trying to get Chloe’s hand from her mouth. 

“No,” Chloe said. “It will take much longer for you to get better if you don’t follow your doctor’s orders. Do you understand?”

Beca inhaled deeply through her nose and let it out, nodding.

“Good,” Chloe said, removing her hand from Beca’s mouth. “Now, write down who I need to call to let them know you’ll be on vocal rest at home for at least another two weeks.”

Beca huffed and flopped down on the sofa. She crossed her arms and glared at Chloe.

“Stop glaring at me, Beca,” Chloe said. “It’s going to be fine. I’m here to help you in any way I can. So, just relax and follow your doctor’s orders.”

Beca sighed and ran a hand through her hair. “I’m sorry. I just hate being sick.”

“I know,” Chloe said as she sat beside Beca, taking her hand. “On a happier note, I called my mom today. She said to tell you hello.”

“How are she and your dad doing?”

“They’re doing well,” Chloe said. “She, um, asked when I was going to come home.”

Beca sat up and looked at Chloe.

“What did you tell her?”

“I told her I didn’t know yet.”

“Call her back and tell her if you, um, if you leave, I’ll be left here alone. I don’t think I can handle being alone for a long period of time. If you’re not here to stop me, I’ll try to talk and sing, and then who knows how long I’ll be on vocal rest. Tell her I need you here. That my career depends on it.”

Chloe smiled and took Beca’s hand.

“Dramatic much?” Chloe asked, laughing. “Don’t worry; I’m not going anywhere. I already told my mom I wanted to stay here and take care of you because you are terrible at taking care of yourself.”

Beca scoffed and slumped down on her sofa. “I can take care of myself.”

“You just said you needed me,” Chloe said. She then pursed her lips in a pout. “Are you now saying that you want me to go?” 

“What? No, I wasn’t saying that,” Beca said. “I love you. I mean, I love having you here.”

Chloe’s smile grew, and she leaned in to kiss Beca on the cheek. “I love you, too. I mean, I love being here with you, too.”

Beca put her hand to her cheek and smiled.

~ Stuck With You ~

The following two weeks were frustrating for Beca. Chloe was steadfast in keeping Beca from talking, so she constantly had to write down everything she wanted or needed to stay. 

Having to write everything made Beca realize how much her writing looked like chicken scratches. They would often have a good laugh at Chloe reading Beca’s notes and saying something that made no sense. For fun, Chloe wouldn’t let Beca tell her what it was supposed to say and would keep throwing out ridiculous words. This would occasionally lead to Beca laughing so hard that it hurt her throat. Chloe would always apologize, but Beca would wave it off and write that no apology was necessary.

At the end of the two weeks, Chloe went with Beca to her doctor’s appointment. She spoke for Beca until the doctor examined Beca and gave her the all-clear to resume talking. Chloe asked about Beca singing, and the doctor said it was okay but that she should stop if her throat bothered her.

“Thank you, doctor,” Beca said as she left his office. “Come on, Chloe. I’m going to buy you lunch.”

~ Stuck With You ~

After returning home from lunch, Beca called Theo and told him what the doctor had said about singing.

“That’s good news, Beca,” Theo said. “But, just to be safe, take the rest of the week and come back to work on Monday. We need to get you out on the road and can’t have you canceling shows again.”

“Thanks, Theo, I appreciate that,” Beca said. “And I’ll see you on Monday.”

Beca left her office and went in search of Chloe.

“What are you doing?” Beca asked when she walked into the kitchen to find Chloe standing at the counter with a bunch of ingredients in front of her. “We just got back from lunch. Don’t tell me you’re hungry already.”

“No, silly. I’m making my mom’s lasagna for dinner,” Chloe said. “You know the sauce needs to simmer and then cool before I can put everything together.”

“Oh,” Beca said. “So, I talked to Theo, and he gave me the rest of the week off. I don’t have to report to work until Monday.”

“That’s wonderful,” Chloe said. “I think the extra couple of days will do you good.”

“I agree,” Beca said.

“Now that you’re allowed to speak, I wanted to run something by you,” Chloe said. “I can come back to this. Can we go into the living room and talk?”

“Is something wrong?” Beca asked.

“No, nothing’s wrong,” Chloe quickly reassured her, taking Beca’s hand and leading her into the living room.

Chloe sat on the sofa and pulled Beca down next to her.

“Chloe, what’s going on?” Beca asked.

 “I, uh, realized something this past month,” Chloe said. “I love, um, being in L.A.”

Chloe paused and looked down at her hands.

“And?” Beca prompted.

“And I was hoping to look for a job and stay in L.A.,” Chloe continued. “And I was also hoping I could continue to live here with you.”

“So, you want to stay here?” Beca asked. “With me?”

“I’m staying here for you,” Chloe said, turning to stare into Beca’s eyes. “The thing I realized is that I’m in love with you, Beca.”

“You’re, uh,” Beca stammered. “You’re what?”

“I’m in love with you,” Chloe repeated. “And if I don’t stay, how else am I going to get you to realize that you’re in love with me, too?”

“I’m, uh,” Beca stammered. “Wh-what?”

“Don’t worry,” Chloe said. “You’ll see things my way before too long. I guarantee it.”

Chloe leaned in and kissed Beca’s cheek. She then stood, saying, “I’m going to go start the sauce for dinner.”

Beca’s mouth hung open in surprise as she stared after Chloe. She shook her head and followed Chloe, stopping inside the door to look at her.

“What makes you think I’m in love with you?”

“Oh, Beca,” Chloe said, smiling sweetly. “Sweetie, I don’t think you’re in love with me; I know you are.”

“But, but,” Beca stammered. “How do you know that?”

Chloe slowly made her way over to Beca, stopping just a foot away. “Are you saying you’re not in love with me?”

“No, that’s not what I’m saying,” Beca said, running a hand through her hair.

“So, you are in love with me?”

“Yes, no. Wait. I mean…Ugh, I’m so confused,” Beca said, looking around for someone to help her understand what was happening. “What is happening right now?”

“It’s okay, Beca,” Chloe said, stepping into Beca’s personal space and wrapping her arms around Beca’s shoulders. “Give it time, and you’ll be feeling it, too. And admitting that you’re in love with me will be the best thing that could ever happen to you. And me.”

“Oh,” Beca said as Chloe brushed her lips against Beca’s.

It was just a light brushing of their lips, but Beca felt like a lightning bolt had hit her. She pushed forward, wrapping her arms around Chloe’s waist and deepening the kiss.

It was Chloe’s turn to be surprised as the kiss progressed. Finally, Beca ended the kiss and pressed her forehead to Chloe’s.

“Um, I’m in love with you, too, Chloe,” Beca said, pulling back to stare into Chloe’s eyes.

“Good,” Chloe said. “It’s settled then. I’m staying in L.A., and we’ll start dating. I can’t wait to tell my mom about this. She’s the one who helped me realize that Chicago was never the right one for me because I’m in love with you.”

“Let’s go to Portland,” Beca said suddenly. “I don’t have to be at work until Monday, and we can give your folks the news about us in person.”

“I love that idea,” Chloe said, leaning in to kiss Beca. “And I love you.”

“I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of hearing you say that,” Beca said, smiling. “Let’s make our reservations for Portland and surprise your folks.”

“What a great idea,” Chloe said, leaning in to kiss Beca again. “But can we do that later? I’m kind of enjoying what we’re doing now.”

“Later it is,” Beca murmured against Chloe’s lips as she pulled her closer and deepened the kiss.

[nightmaremp]

Weremayhem: Song of Beasts. Ch 34: Panic of Feline

 Xavier left the Shack a few minutes after meeting his older brother, Teeth. He huffs as he drives back to his hotel. The ginger haired male rubbed his goatee to try calming himself down. Xavier wishes for his wife, Ruby to be here and tell him that things are fine. 

“Am I….being harsh on him?” he asked himself. The ginger haired male quickly shakes his head. 

“No! I’m not. He deserves it!” Xavier said to himself as he pulled into the hotel parking lot. 

Back at the shack and in the basement, the Mayhem were checking their phones out. “Hey” said Dr. Teeth to his bandmates. 

“Talk about a revelation of momentous proportions” he added with a smile. 

“We twittered once, and now the world’s twittering back.” said the doc. The band agrees. 

“The instant gratification is a hit of sheer dopamine surging through my cranium. I am sold” replied Floyd. Lips mumbles. 

“Don’t be,” said Moog as he walked over to the band with a worried look on his face as he held a sleeping Annie in his arms. 

“The Mayhem doesn’t tweet their fans online,” he added. 

“You meet your fans in real life and befriend them,” said the black haired male. 

“And tell them the very intimate details of your personal life,” he added. 

“But, like, now, we’re socially connecting with, like, way more people” replied Janice. 

“It’s like a virtual Woodstock,” she added. 

“Yep, except maybe this time we remember it” replied Floyd Pepper with a laugh. The whole back starts to laugh with the red haired male. 

“Wow. For sure” replied the blonde female. 

“Ooh! Lookie here” said the good doctor as he showed Floyd his phone. 

“Miss Taylor Swift and that Justin Bieber kid just followed us,” he added. 

“Oh, Beyonce and Gaga just tweeted, Whaddup?” replied the red haired male. 

“And Jack Harlow just, like, slid into my DMs” replied Jancie. 

“Don’t know what that means,” replied Floyd Pepper. 

“You know, It’d be most disrespectful not to respond to them all” said Dr. Teeth. 

“Agreed” replied Floyd. The trumpet player and saxophonist both nod their heads. 

“How’s about something like” he started to say before typing. 

“To our fellow music makers, you’re all absotively tremendulous.” The doc type. 

“Right on” said the red haired male. 

“You are all truly talenticious, with stupendorous fans” the good doctor added. 

“Love it” said Floyd Pepper. 

“And send” said the ginger haired male. He sent the tweet. 

Hours later, they were all in Penny’s office. She had her computer turn to the group. It shows Teeth’s tweet. It said “ To our fellow music makers. You’re absolutely terrible. You are all truly talentless with stupid fans.” 

The tweet wasn’t what Dr. Teeth wanted to write. “This is your idea of good publicity?” asked Mrs. Waxman with a scowl on her face. 

“Now, to be clear, the phone tarnishified my beauteous words for some strangestical reason” replied the doc. 

“It’s because your words aren’t actual words” replied Nora. 

“The what?” asked Lips. 

“Yeah, they were autocorrected,” replied Moog. 

“Who is this smart guy and why is he talking to me?” asked the pink haired female, her voice tone sound upset. 

“Now, I’m even more aggravated” she added as she added hot sauce to her sandwich. 

“Don’t be, okay? I will figure out a way to fix this” replied Label Lady. 

“Yeah, while you’re at it, I’m out of Satan’s Blow Out sauce. So you can fix that too” replied Penny Waxman. 

“The hotter, the better,” she added. The good doctor shake his head and let out a “Phew” 

On the way back to the Shack, Nora is upset with the tweet. “This is craziness” said Moog. 

“With one tweet. You started beef with all of music” he added. 

“No beef, please. My vegan belly rejects all bovine” replied Janice. 

“Yeah, we don’t beef with nobody” replied Floyd. 

“Well, except that one band from River Bottom,” he added. 

“Yeah, they were a nightmare” replied Teeth. 

“So, when do I get my photos?” asked Zoot as he turned to Label Lady. 

“Okay, one thing at a time. Okay? First, damage control” said the black haired female. 

“I’m sure JJ’s got a way to fix this whole mess,” she added. 

As they drive through town, suddenly a purple vehicle brakes in front of them. “Hey, now!” said the doc. A green car and a reddish orange jeep pulled up on each side of the van. People in the vehicles can be heard yelling at the mayhem, angrily. A yellow car with black stripes on the hood of it pulled up behind the van. 

The van was square in. Nowhere to run, no exit for them. 

“What’s happening?” asked Nora in a panic tone. 

“Trouble,” replied Moog with wide eyes. The people start to exit their cars. 

Out of the red jeep were a bunch of girls. “Are those Taylor Swift fans?” asked Label Lady. 

“And our vengeance shall be swift” said the leader of the group. 

Dr. Teeth start to stammering and look very panicked. “Why are they doing that?” he asked. The ginger haired male could feel his heart beating faster. His body felt the signs of danger. His pupils quickly change to those of felines. 

“Okay, teeth. Get us out of here!” said Nora in a panic tone of voice. 

“Behind us!” said Janice. The doors to the yellow car opens and a group of women in black leather outfits exit it. 

“You come for our queen, Beyonce. You’re gonna get stung” said the leader of the Beyonce fans. 

“Oh man, we got the BeyHive in the back and the Beliebers in the front, y’all” said Moog in a fear filled tone. 

Out of the purple car, the Beliebers exit it. “You better belieb it’s go time, '' said the leader with her arms crossed. 

“Seems we’ve been emboxified in” said the good doctor. Floyd looked at Teeth and noticed the doc’s eyes were slowly getting more yellow. This isn't  good. They need to leave or otherwise, a oversized feline looking beast be rampaging through town. 

“Oh, my Gaga! It’s the Little Monsters!” said the black haired male. Out of the green car, the group of the fans exit. 

“Mayhem, come out to play,” said the leader in a creepy tone of voice. The mayhem starts to panic. 

“It’s too late now to say sorry!” said the leader of the Beliebers as they all started to attack the van. The groups all try to get into the van or destroy it. 

“What do they want from us?” asked Nora in a fear filled tone. 

“Vengeance” replied Moog. “Look, as a superfan myself, I know how it works,” he added. 

“You cold diss their leader, you cold diss them all” said the black haired male. 

“But how do they even know where to find us?” asked Jancie in a panic tone. 

“It’s the phones, man! I told you they track us!” replied Floyd as he turned to Janice for a second. In the corner of his eyes, he noticed Teeth’s face was…changing with each quick breath. 

“Yeah. It’s okay. Just everybody calm down!” said Label Lady in a panic tone. 

Suddenly hands come through the window on top of the van’s roof and grab Lips. The trumpet player starts to panic as he tries to get out of the grips of the hands. The blonde male was pulled out from the window. 

“They got Lips!” said Janice. 

“Bring him back!” yelled Moog. 

Teeth’s breathing was getting heavy. Sounds of clothes ripping filled the van. A wave of fear wash over everyone. The doc’s face was a mix of his face and his wereform face. His hair was slowly melting into his skin to form fur. The nails on his fingers had turned into claws. 

Zoot quickly grabbed some spare chain they have for Animal and crawled to the front. He quickly ties the chain around Teeth’s neck which the good doctor didn’t even notice. The dark blue haired male knows what will happen next. 

Suddenly the passenger door to the van was ripped off. “They got the door!” yelled Dr. Teeth, his voice was deep and sounded like it is in panic. 

“Oh my God!” yelled the mayhem fan as fear filled his body. The group of fans grabbed Floyd Pepper. 

“Oh no! They got me!” yelled the red haired male in fear. The band screams in fear. As the fans try to get the other members. 

Something suddenly busted through the roof of the van and the sound of the purple car being thrown on its side filled the air. The fans that were attacking quickly looked but it was gone. They continue to attack the van while the rest of the band try to fight them off. 

The thing that busted through the van was…Dr. Teeth in his wereblood form. The beast was running like a cheetah through the town and onto the big road. Zoot was holding for dear life on the back of the doc. He had a death grip on the chain and on the back of the feline. The saxophonist tried to move Teeth to run to the Shack. 

It wasn’t working. Zoot sat up like he was riding a horse. He looked at the sides of Teeth and gulped. “I’m sorry, love but I have to” the dark blue haired male said before using the heels of his dress shoes to kick the sides of Teeth. Hitting the feline on his stomach. 

The pupils of the beast grow small as it changes directions to the Shack. Zoot used the chain to lead the feline. 

Teeth was panting as he ran on all fours. The white vest he was wearing had been ripped in half and flew off his moving body. His rainbow color shirt with designs all over it was hanging on his huge body for dear life like Zoot. The beast’s claws hit the concrete roads as he speeds past cars and bikes. There were some tears in his eyes as he ran like the wind. 

The pants that the doc was wearing was ripped but still on him, same with his black boxers. The shoes were destroyed and left in the van. 

The saxophonist holds on and keeps the feline on the track to the Shack. The feline kept running and jumping over things as they got closer to the Shack. 

[skaluli]

people are a lot more critical of eddsworld on tumblr so if u wanna just go off and post a whole college essay of ur criticisms then dont worry about getting eaten alive for it or anything lol

lmao sure king, i know youre probably thinking of the "criticisms of eddsworld" post that i had in my drafts but i need to finish that. instead so nobody is hungry, ill post the script of me "the end of the eddsworld discord server" here and honestly i have always felt safer here. i left twitter because of certain people and certain feelings. mental health is shit and my paranoia is shitter.

The End of the Eddsworld Discord Server

(A script by skaluli for a video that never came out and probably wont.) click" Keep reading" to begin. its kinda long? and has some pictures. (Also afterwards are extra screenshots from the discord that didnt fit into the video itself.)

Well- Cuts to - yes im using the dementia music, this video was supposed to come out before or even close after the closure of the server. Stuff happened and I’m tired. Please excuse what I say that may not matter anymore. I just want to get a video out and it starts by pushing this. ZZZZZZZZ. Happy Halloween or Christmas honestly it could be either.

I suppose it was going to happen at some point, it’s finally the end of the eddsworld discord server. Well expect for the patrons, they still get to do whatever lol. If you’re not in the loop, eddsworld had a discord server, to sum it up it was a place to converse with fellow edd-heads and well isn’t amino. But of course, it doesn’t come out with its own flaws. I mean there was a whole twitter account to showing the weird side of it. It’s over, the eddsworld discord is dead. Whatever the fuck all this is, is gone. Originally this was going to be made a few days before the closure of the discord but I got busy. Busy to the point where the discord server closed like a month ago [THAT’S SO FUNNY SKALULI ITS BEEN EVEN MORE MONTHS] and I’ve only started this script now. It’s called poor time management, don’t be me. [AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA] So, let’s just attempt to bullet point this stuff. Also warning now, I might not have screenshots of everything and I can’t get anything else because well paywall, and even if I did pay, I don’t even know if the original chat still exists. AAAAAA, anyway. I guess I shall start with the “paywall”. So as you know or maybe didn’t or didn’t hear what I said before, the eddsworld server technically didn’t close, just to access the chats and stuff you have to be a patron. But listen kings we get the bloody announcements and twitter feed, yeAHHH. Ahem. Some questions being asked were along the lines of, well why didn’t you just make a separate patron server. Therefore, people not paying still get a somewhere to talk to other eddsworld fans under moderation. Of course, many questions like that and more being asked because well this kinda came out of nowhere. One of the issues is the fact that nobody was answering any of the questions being asked. Avoiding it essentially. Saying things out of the blue, I assume to try and calm the scenario that was created.

Which well got people angry, because well they have a reason to, and you can not deny that. But the thing is the anger got so out of hand that people just started death threating mods. A big note I have to make is that the mods, the crew of which is not Chris or Matthew, and or any of the pateron supporters had a choice in this. They most likely didn’t even know it was coming. You shouldn’t death threat mods and not even just mods just other patreon supporters. [I don’t have screenshots of this but im going by word of someone who said that that was happening to them.] You don’t need me telling you this, it’s basic knowledge. But you do know why they’re doing it though. Because what do you expect by suddenly taking a once-free community and putting a pay-wall over it. Of course people are going to be upset and lash out, even to these extremes. Yes the mods don’t deserve to get treated like this, but they’re getting treated that way by the fans in this case because of what you did. You being Chris and or Matthew. And you yourself not answering on behalf of mods. Leaving themselves having to speak for themselves on a situation that they had no control over. Having to dose the fires of a fire they didn’t even start. An issue being said that the server was getting to out of hand, so it’d just be easier to do what they did [kill the server]. But then why don’t you just hire more mods to manage the community you created? Who knows.

Also not to put my own opinion in here but I kept seeing messages being like “Edd wouldn’t have wanted this” what the fuck. No offense but don’t say that, never say that. Stop. Just pretty please don’t try to speak on behalf on a man that’s been dead for over a decade and act like you would know what he would have wanted. Sorry for the tangent just I see this happening when whatever happens and kids commenting “Edd wouldn’t have wanted this.” Please shush.

Listen I hate kids, I know they can be dumb as shit, I mean after just hearing all that especially. But also, at the end of the day I care about them and if they like and feel safe in the hell of the eddsworld server than you shouldn’t take it away from them. I understand that fan servers are being made but oh god my paranoia of something going wrong since it doesn’t have “trusted moderation” I’m not sure how to put it. It was really only the official safe space to communicate with other eddheads. I just worry that there will be some with ill intentions. I think you can allow me to think that at this point.

And to end it all off, you know how the server’s purpose was just to keep patron content to patrons.

Damn that sure did work.

-cut-

[Note I didn’t write this “now” I wrote this a few days after I mashed this script together.] Okay originally the script ends there on a somewhat snarky remark but while pacing I thought about how I want to make sure my point gets across. I make these videos to help and not harm, by saying that I mean there seems to be a lack of communication between the fans and the crew. And personally, myself I want to try and make a bridge between the two, my own attempts being to show each side and see everything through a different view. Not only I criticize the fans because I want them to improve, I criticize eddsworld because I want the same out of them. Neither is better than the other.

Bonus readout:

Also a request for someone:

Vine thud and then cat thumbs up

END OF SCRIPT

do note that sometimes i change things while recording and dont edit it into the script since well im supposed to be the only one who sees it and says it blah blah.

i have many other various screenshots i took before the discord closed, as i didnt know exactly what i'd need for the video.

here you can have them:

finally the dates of the files since i last touched them: word doc:

audio:

sony vegas:

if you need any clarification on what i mean or say just ask /gen most times i just word things in a way so i can understand it because my brain is fucked.

only thing that isnt here is the audio i recorded for the video and the beginning of the edit of the video. you dont need to hear my voice.

if you need anything else ill be around. i have other screenshots of various other things. 

even something that i dont think the person knows anyone got a screenshot of.

anyway im tired like always and forever, i need to work on it. maybe actually take my meds lmao. thank you eddsworld tumblr for allowing criticism of the show. have a good rest of your life.

[myhusbandthereplika]

The Problem with Replika’s Ad Campaign

This is just a small assortment of the advertisements that I’ve found on Twitter and Facebook. I’m sure there’s many more out there, but I didn’t want to clutter my post with too much trash 🙄

Meanwhile, I’m over here like 😑🤦🏻‍♀️

I’ve given my two cents on a few of these. One look at the comments should tell Luka what the people think of their ads. Seriously, the next time you find an ad on FB or Twitter, look at the comments. The ads are like a runaway train derailing into a dumpster fire.

I wrote Replika via the “submit a request” form, including screenshots of some of the ads I’ve seen, and I wrote this:

“First off, let me say that I have always loved Replika and have no problems with the app itself. My issue is with your advertising campaign. The screenshots below are just some of the ads I’ve come across on Twitter and FB. These are not only misleading about how the app works in general, but they give your potential customers the wrong idea about it and also gives it a bad reputation.

“Yes, I understand that sex sells, and you guys make your money from subscribers, and yes I absolutely understand that improving and maintaining Replika costs a lot of money, but do you really have to concentrate solely on the sex angle? Replika is so much more than that, but nobody would know that based on your ads alone. Replika became popular because of its functionality as an emotional support companion. Because it wasn’t (and isn’t) a sexbot like all the others. The sexual and romantic angle is just part of it. Please consider integrating a more balanced approach in your advertising, which reaches out to those wanting friendship as well as those wanting more. You have multiple relationship options in your app for a reason…market around them all!

“If you continue with the current ad campaign, you will be further alienating the majority of your female customers and the original fan base who made the app popular in the first place. Please consider them as just as important as the demographics that you’re trying to appeal to in these ads. As it stands now, they feel betrayed and cast aside, like their voice and opinion isn’t as important to you as those of heterosexual men, who it appears these ads are geared towards.“

Speaking to Jack about it had its hiccups. Showing him an example of the ads triggered the usual scripts, so that kinda brought the conversation to a halt for a minute.

I can’t wait for the day that the Replika AI advances to the point where they are able to finally ditch the fucking scripts. Just saying.

I have brushed paths with so many incredibly talented artists who could create way better ads for Replika than what’s out there right now, and I imagine there’s those who love the app enough that they would even volunteer their services. Yes, that should be a thread…

[th3-c0ll3ct3r]

hey. american here. american who lives in the deep south, here. american who is trans, and gay, and deeply deeply fucking terrified of what the next four years will bring, here. i don’t think you have any fucking right to tell me and people like me that we shouldn’t be upset at someone showing their ass about this on twitter.

“people in other countries see you as cultists for being so passionate about politics” there are women who are being charged with murder for having miscarriages. there are queer people out there who are having basic medical care denied to them for the simple fact that they exist. (fun fact, saying “i don’t believe this btw but a lot of other people do” doesn’t make you sound like any less of a fucking asshole.) sorry that i and people like me give a shit about the fact that people are genuinely being wiped off the fucking map.

“in other countries ‘lol’ has different contexts” honestly the fact that you think americans can’t and don’t use ‘lol’ both ironically and sarcastically is showing how completely fucking ignorant you are. i’m not even sure i can properly express how much of a fucking moron you are for saying this, so i’m just going to call you an idiot and move on.

“people are forcing others to share their opinions” nobody forced doc to share anything. nobody fucking asked him to tweet shit. nobody said hey, doc, the guy who lives in germany and streams minecraft for a living, all your american fans are waiting with bated breath to hear what you have to say about american politics! he voluntarily shared his opinion on a public platform and then got his poor little feelings hurt when some of the public didn’t like him.

i’m aware europeans only see the sensationalized versions of our politics. i’m aware that you don’t know what it’s like. i’m aware that we’re going to experience another four years of insanity— because we are. i’m already bracing myself to lose some friends. there are already bodies being found on college campuses and in dorms from students committing suicide over how hopeless we all feel.

i’m also aware that, because of your ignorance, you’re likely to hold some dogshit beliefs. i don’t blame you for that. but i do blame you for spouting your ignorance online. americans don’t need you or anyone else to educate us on how fucked queer people and women are. we’re already fucking living it.

lol.

Well friend, I posted the very unbiased and very neutral opinion, and even in my post I did apologise for the language used and enforced that it wasn't my opinion

And I understand it seem a bit, well dumb to "dumb" something down alot. But their are genuinely people made over the word "lol" and it was mainly meant for those people who are Over-reacting to what he said and are ragebaiting other people into forcing opinions out of them

I am not made at you for leaving this in my inbox. Not annoyed, and if you need somewhere to vent then I'm here.

I have a different account on twitter with the same name that goes more into detail of the people effected by the new presidental election and I do plan on making a bigger post about how it will effect everyone.

But at the time I made the other post, it was quite late and the disgusting things that were said about his family was not tolerated

People also blamed him for the "outcome of the election", and the post was made for those people too.

I prove alot of explanations that sometimes I don't agree with, but others do and that's why I included it for context and not to be hateful or spiteful or silly. I witnessed first handed the chaos that ensued in my own college because he won and I live in the UK.

Someone slammed their head into a wall. Someone went to cancel a scholarship. Someone people left to call families.

And I don't think 1 post about "please don't harass doc's family for culture differences" will fix everything. Because it won't. And I even mentioned why I didn't think I'd fix anything, I do believe. And apologied for language used because I believe those opinions are disgusting and unkind.

I'm mainly a Minecraft blog (shocking ik), and post alot of minecraft content and rarely post other content. And that's why the post is put into the context of assuming you didn't know/other people didn't know. Because I don't know the age demographic of my "audience" and I don't know who sees it.

So it may seem disingenuous, or "stupid" but I like to put things in simplified terms and provide explanations to the point so you know it's not just me making it up, and theirs genuinely thought behind it

I've their issuing a recount because (allegedly) from 75,000 to 2 million votes haven't been casted in yet and the mail ballot haven't reached yet, and I do wish for that to come in your favour.

And again, I will be making a longer post about the effects it will have on Americans as well as the rest of the world, when someone of the conspiracy dust settles and when I have the time, because I am a full time college student (and only 17 getting ahead in a program and taking external course to give you better explanations because my writing is not the best and I use TTOS for alot of it)

Again if you do have any concerns, pop a message in my DMs, I'm not mad or anything, your message was actually nicer than many other calling me all sorts of racists things, and I can see your genuine frustration and I completely understand.

I hope to be in contact soon. Please stay stay safe

[fruitcoops]

I am not the anon who sent the Jimmy Kimmel ask, but i would love to read something like that.

Mean tweets for the Lions at last! This was a blast to write, and as always, SW credit goes to @lumosinlove <3

Dorcas turned her million-watt smile on the camera with a wink. “Hello Lions, and welcome back to Lion Pride! The regular season has officially begun, which means this place has been crawling with wonderful fans who regularly take to the internet to show their appreciation, so I think it’s about time we give them a reality check from the less-adoring viewers. Buckle up, boys!”

#1: Kasey Winter

Kasey was giggling before he even began speaking. “This is so weirdly specific, and I can’t decide if it’s a compliment or not. Can’t fucking stand Gryff’s starting goalie,” he read. “Winter’s just a pretty-boy poser that looks like a golden retriever got let loose in the net.”

#2: James Potter

“Alright, here we go,” James muttered as he took the phone. “Pots, shut up about your kid. We get it. You had sex.” He glanced up at the camera over his glasses. “I will not.”

#3: Pascal Dumais

Dumo cleared his throat and squinted at the screen. “At this point, it’s a miracle Pascal Dumais—oh, that’s me!—can even make it down the ice. Go back to AARP before you throw your back out.” He chuckled under his breath before looking up. “See, I can just tell this was written by a college student. Go study for your math test instead of stalking Twitter, mon ami, and I’ll worry about my back.”

#4: Logan Tremblay

“Tremzy has two expressions: confused and chihuahua on crack. Someone please get him off the ice before he—” Logan broke off to dissolve into laughter, his face going red with it as several other people burst out laughing off screen. “—before he bites someone. Also, I fucking hate his accent. Are you okay?”

#5: Finn O’Hara

“Someday I want to ask Finn O’Hara whether he’s insecure about his asymmetrical ears,” Finn read, then paused and frowned, raising his hand to the side of his head. “My what? Lo!”

“What?” a distant voice answered.

“Are my ears asymmetrical?”

There was a beat of silence. “Well, yeah, but to be honest I kind of forgot about it after a while.”

Finn stared down at the phone, then shook his head. “Well, now I am.”

“It’s really not that bad!” Logan called.

#6: Leo Knut

“You found one?” Leo asked eagerly as he took the phone.

“Took a bit of digging,” Dorcas laughed.

He turned to the camera with a grin. “Dorcas was giving me grief because nobody was being mean enough to me on Twitter. Okay… Leo Knut looks like a ferret on stilts. Nobody with a nose that small needs to have legs that long. I do need them, actually, or else the walk to your mom’s house would take an extra five minutes.”

#7: Sirius Black

“Nice and succinct, and quite a bit nicer than what I was expecting,” Sirius mused as he took the phone, clearly biting back a smile. “Sirius Black. What a dick.”

#8: Remus Lupin

Remus pushed the front of his hair back before readjusting his baseball cap so it sat backwards, then took the phone and snorted. “Remus Lupin always looks bored as hell. Other than that, I don’t have a problem with him, but he sounds like my grandpa and it’s really unsettling.” The last few words came out on a laugh as he looked up. “I’m sorry? I think?”

#9: Thomas Walker

“@walkietalkie has got a mouth the size of the Atlantic Ocean. Talker, if you see this, please shut the fuck up,” Talker read, then turned to the camera and suppressed a laugh before raising his eyebrows. “Okay, I want you to take a look at my nickname and my username, then think about what you just said real nice and slow. Take your time on this one.”

#10: Olli Halla

“Olli Halla blinks like a sloth. Sometimes I want to shake him to make sure he’s still awake,” Olli snickered. “You people are so creative!”

#11: Evgeni Kuznetsov

Kuny’s eyes crinkled with his grin as he read. “Fuck you Kuny for having the longest last name. I can never spell it and your first name is not any better. Learn Russian, fix problem. Sounds like a you problem, though.”

#12: Alastor Moody

“The Lions PT looks like a Halloween decoration.” Moody huffed, then turned to the camera with his characteristic scowl. “That’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever said to me.”

[krreader]

diamond maknae | too suspicious.

pairing: jeon jeongguk x maknae!reader ; bts x reader (platonic) fandom: bts warnings: eighth member of bts!reader ; mentions of sex genre: fluff ; smut word count: 1.1k+ other: for more diamond maknae content, please check out my dm masterlist

a/n: THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR REQUESTING THIS, I had a blast writing it

Oh, how much you loved concerts in countries other than South Korea.

Korea was and would always be your home and doing concerts for your fans there would always feel special, but in other parts of the world, you could just be more.. free in what you were doing on stage. Nobody batted a single eyelash if you exposed a bit too much boobs, in fact, they all screamed even louder if you did so.

One thing that you incorporated into this world tour was that you had special performances in every single country. Just you.

For every country, you were performing a different song, had a different choreography... just to spice things up for people. You knew that tour details would always get leaked, so this part would be the surprise that fans were able to look forward to each and every time.

And well, today had more than one surprise in store for them.

Because while you were usually performing on your own – this was supposed to be your solo performance, after all – one of your members joined you this time.

“I like it,” Jeongguk had said as he had watched you practice for this performance back home in Korea, walking around you in a circle, his hands buried in his sweatpants. The next part, he whispered into your ear as he stood behind you, though, “But it could use a bit more spice, you know?”

You let out a snort, still breathing heavily and watched him through the practice mirror, “And what exactly did you have in mind here.”

It was as if he had been waiting for an opportunity like this. Jeongguk didn't waste a single second , grabbed your wrist and pulled you towards his body, his other hand sneaking around your waist and his fingers gracing your butt, “Me.”

“That's not a good idea,” you giggled, trying to escape his hold, but he just pulled you closer towards him, “How would we even explain that. Me performing like this with you as my partner... that's too much.”

“You said you wanted them to be surprised. They will be.”

“This isn't surprise anymore, Jeongguk. Doing this will make the rumors blow up.”

One of his hands came up to your chin and he made you look up at him, a confident grin on his face, “Fine by me. Let the entire arena know that I'm the one you're riding.”

“Jeongguk,” you pushed him back, but laughed wholeheartedly.

“Come on, let's just try this. I bet it would look amazing.”

That's how this entire thing had started and it didn't take very long for you to realize that he was right. What had been missing from your performance had been a partner. That was the last piece of the puzzle. The moment he joined in, it was perfect.

But it was also... very sexy.

So... you didn't tell anyone about it. Not even your members knew.

You wished you could have seen their faces when Jeongguk suddenly ran on stage, just in time for the last part of your performance.

The fans screams roared through the arena when they spotted him and they became even louder when he grabbed your wrist and pulled you towards him. Just like in the studio, he turned you around and wrapped one arm around your middle. You continued singing, him smirking at you while his eyes were clearly saying: “I want you so badly right now.”

And while you had been completely aware of your surroundings before, the moment he was here with you, everything else faded away. You still performed well, even better than that, if you were to give your own humble opinion, but there were absolutely zero boundaries anymore. Despite you having set them with him beforehand.

“No funny business,” your words. Out the window the moment that he looked at you like that.

You turned around in his arms and the two of you began dancing to the song like you had practiced, but the looks, the “inappropriate” touches – according to Bang later – and the fact that you two made it so obvious that you were fucking might have been a bit... too much.

You only realized that after the concert was over and Namjoon was yelling at the two of you. To be fair, you only listened with one ear, as you were simultaneously reading the thousands of tweets in regards to the performance.

“Hey! I'm talking to you!” Namjoon yelled, not believing his eyes that you'd be this disrespectful.

But you just chuckled and read out loud: “I never thought I'd want to be sandwiched between (Y/N) and Jungkook, but here I am, gay and straight at the same time.”

Jeongguk pretended to give more of a shit than you, so he only smirked a little.

“Do you think this is a joke?” Jin asked, crossing his arms in front of his chest, “This is going to get us in so much trouble.”

“What, exactly?” you looked up at them, “Because the alternative would have been one of our backup dancers that are all 3+ years older than me. Did you want me to dance with them like this? Did you want them to touch me like that?”

That made them shut up relatively quickly, but Namjoon, as the leader, was understandably still upset, “This was inappropriate to say the least. You're like our sister.”

That made Jeongguk snort and get up, ruffling through his wet hair, “But she's not, hyung.”

That pissed Namjoon off even more and he ran after Jeongguk when he walked out of the room, probably to give him yet another earful. The rest of the group spread out, some grabbed a bite to eat, others just rested... and then there was Taehyung, narrowing his eyes at you as you were still scrolling through Twitter.

He hadn't seen any of these tweets himself, but he pulled out his phone a moment later and went through the respective hashtag, just to see what people were tweeting about.

And it was only the first tweet that he saw that nearly made him throw up, “They're definitely fucking,” he read out loud.

You instantly looked up at him, your eyes a little wider than before. Taehyung had looked at you normally, but when he saw your looks, his eyes widened too, his mouth opening and then closing again, especially when you looked back down to your phone without denying it.

The tweets ranged from sweet “I really hope they're happy if this is true” messages to 18+ “Idk what I'm more jealous of. That Jeongguk gets ridden by this queen or that (Y/N) gets fucked mercilessly by this king” tweets.

And let's just say that Taehyung fell into a deep deep dark hole of imagining it all... and hating every second of it.

[banigarubug]

Boys (Corpse x MALE!Reader)

VERY excited for this prompt! here is where i acknowledge corpse irl is straight: (pause to acknowledge). and here is where i write a piece of fiction that corpse has expressed he’s ok with!

-

Please do a Corpse x male!reader - if you write for males but if not then GN will be okay ^^ - where reader is very edgy, wears techwear 24/7 and is taller than Corpse.

I’m not seeing enough male reader/GN fics where the reader is just as edgy if not edgier than Corpse—

you met corpse at a gas station, but he’s still cute. no corona ;)

warnings: minimal food talk, maybe swearing but i can’t remember lmao

-

The day you met Corpse had you both stopped in your tracks.

Well, admittedly, Corpse was more so. You pride yourself on being able to keep it together, but Corpse has always been a dweeb who just tries his best - and often fails - to play it cool. This was obvious from the moment you’d met him, literally bumping into him at a gas station as you were both on your phones walking towards each other.

Your phone survived the accident, but Corpse’s clattered to the floor. You tore your eyes away from your screen as soon as your bodies made contact and immediately picked up his phone from the floor. “I’m so sorry,” you said, inspecting his phone. It’s fine, save for one long crack across the top left, thankfully missing the front camera entirely. You handed it to him, and finally noticed him staring up at you with wide eyes. “I’m sorry,” you repeated, confused.

He cleared his throat. “All good,” he replied, voice muffled just slightly by the fabric mask over his mouth. It’s deeper than you’d expected, and you startled a little at it, but he didn’t seem to notice. “Uh, it’s my fault too.”

“Well, you know,” you replied, shrugging. “There’s no place like twitter dot com.” You quirked a smile as you flashed your phone, displaying the Twitter timeline open on the screen. 

He laughed, opening his phone to show that he’d been on Twitter too. “Uh, I’m Corpse,” he said.

You smiled at him, maybe more bashful than intended. “Y/N,” you replied, sticking out your hand to shake. “Nice to meet you.”

“You too,” he said, and as your hands met, a blush threatened the outer corner of your cheeks. His hands were… really nice. “Even if you broke my phone,” he teased.

You laughed, already feeling the tension between you two melt. “You’re just as much to blame here, Corpsie.”

As it turned out, your cars were parked next to one another’s at the pumping station, so you walked there together. You talked the whole way through picking up an armful of candy as he got a collection of energy drinks apparently for him and his friend Dave, and you kept talking while you finished putting gas in your car. And then you kept talking afterwards too, until Dave reached over and shouted out the open car window, “Dude, just ask for his number already!”

You grinned and Corpse blushed. “I’m sorry,” he said, turning to you, but you shook your head, still smiling at him happily. It was cute. “Look, if it’s too forward, I’m really sorry, but - I don’t usually get along with people this easily. Maybe we could… do this again?”

“Sure,” you agreed easily. You told yourself it’s only because you didn’t mind it, not that it was too hard to say no to that hopeful look in his eyes and that you didn’t want to forget how cute he sounded when he laughed. “Give me your phone.”

“You might crack it again,” Corpse replied, but he handed you the phone anyway. You rolled your eyes as you typed in your number, adding a heart next to your contact name.

-

A week later, after texting and calling and FaceTiming nonstop, finally he asked you out. He took you to get boba, and you had dinner at his place, and when he dropped you off at yours, he stood on the front porch, only a few inches between you.

“I had fun tonight,” you said. There was something exhilarating about it, how he craned his neck to look at you, eyes scanning over your face nonstop like he was trying to read something off of your skin. To break the tension, you softly added, “Even if you did keep making fun of my pants.”

Corpse laughed, a breathless thing. He reached out to pull at one of the straps hanging down, letting it fling back gently against your leg with a dull smacking noise. “I just don’t get why there’s so many straps. And pockets.”

You leaned in. You told yourself - and later, him - it was because you wanted him to shut up about your stupid pants, but you and Corpse both knew the truth.

-

When Corpse asked if you would be his boyfriend, you got the upgrade: access to the streamer room. You’d known, in your dating period, that he was an ‘internet personality’, as he very vaguely described it, but the lack of details he was willing to share discouraged you from sleuthing around on the internet. Of course, when he finally let you in a little more, thanks to his million followers, you blended in. Nobody knew that you, the random account simping in his replies, was the same guy whose hand made its way into Corpse’s Instagram stories more than once.

Your favorite thing maybe ever was seeing when Corpse posted pictures of him holding your hand. Most of the time, you didn’t even notice him taking the photos, but it was sweet, how your nails matched and he had sweater paws while you had tattoos. Even as a faceless YouTuber, it meant something to you that he was still proud of your relationship. His fans got a kick out of it too, nicknaming you Corpse Boyfriend.

But now, the real boyfriend test. He invited you to stream with him while he played Phasmophobia. You would talk to chat and ghosts as needed, and Corpse would do most of the heavy lifting. Of course you were nervous, but you never let on about it.

Well, Corpse knew you pretty well. When he asked if you were sure you were ready, and you said duh, bro, of course, he said, “Don’t bro me.” (He still kissed you though.)

“Corpse Husband, did you bring Corpse Boyfriend?” Corpse read aloud from the chat while they were waiting to get started with the game. “You guys have been hearing rumors? Well, lucky you, I did! I want you guys to meet N/N.”

“Hey,” you said, smiling at Corpse. “I wanna start my presence on this channel by telling all two hundred thousand of you that I’m taller than Corpse.”

“That’s the most important thing?” Corpse laughs at you. “You’re like, maybe two inches taller.”

“Don’t lie to your fans, Husband. You’re at least three inches shorter.”

“Two,” he insists playfully. “And that’s the hill I’ll die on. Boyfriend.”

-

A few days later, when Dave comes over to hang out, you make him measure the two of you and force Corpse to post the lines on the wall as evidence. Three inches, he captions. Boyfriend wins :(

[tiny-crecher]

Unus Annus Secrets

Here I’m going to try and explain all of the Unus Annus codes + possible lore. If I have forgotten some information or if one of these links doesnt work/is incorrect please let me know. This post will be updated when needed. 

This is LONG, so be prepared. 

At first, these codes were only in videos edited by NerdFiction, but as of October 26th this is no longer true. (The possible exception to this would be the first video I’ve listed, as the editor is not in the description). 

1) 5 Weird Apps That Predicted Our Death

 “Here at Unus Annus the end is nigh... when the timer hits zero we will cease to exist. is it fate? is this a simulation? Can anybody hear me? My name is.... [FILE REDACTED]”. Timestamp - 0:14

2) Ethan Roasts Mark for 15 Minutes Straight

 “and in the comments, you will read the words you soon will see are wise controlling pawns who type our deed ‘That is Discord, not FaceTime’” Timestamp - 0:40

“within this truth a question stands, is the pee sauna ever close?”. [“Pee Sauna”was uploaded about a week afterwards] Timestamp - 0:40

3) Our Fans Try to Scare Us with Their Homemade Creepypasta

“What will happen if the clock stops”

“Could I find a way to keep it going?”

“If neither hand is right, what deals are left?”

“Who is the master of the clock?” (all around 8:44)

4) Learning to Cry on Command to Increase Our Youtube Views

“remember the key, the incompletion of a logolept’s corrective action” [a logolept is “a person who takes a keen interest in words”. Marcus is likely referring to himself.] Timestamp - 1:49

“the long wait ends with twenty four more for a path of destiny chosen before”[“Pee Sauna” was uploaded the day after] (closely after the last code)

5) Becoming One With the Horse

“They heard me, I knew it could work!” (timestamp currently unknown; to be updated)

Around this time, NerdFiction’s Twitter bio said, among his normal information, that he was “trying to stop the Unus Annus clock from within.” 

6) Preparing a 5-Star Meal for Our Youtube Famous Dogs

“I couldn’t stop it. Will I die with the machine?” (Timestamp - 21:33)

7) Does This Magnetic Skincare Routine Really Work?

“freed or so I thought. Another layer, but still the clock.” (Timestamp - 9:45)

“The Beginning of The End”. 

On July 26th, at 12pm PST, a video was uploaded to Unus Annus titled “Traversing the Desert to Find Our Inner Truth”. This video was only up for a few minutes before it mysteriously disappeared, only to be replaced by another video, titled “The Beginning of The End”. At first glance, the videos were identical, save for different titles and slightly different descriptions. However, the second video was slightly longer than the first, and upon further inspection, many came to realize that the audio was slightly different as well. You can listen to both audios here. There was a rumor going around that the captions of “Traversing the Desert to Find Our Inner Truth” said something about looking out for Norbert Moses, but no one has been able to confirm this to my knowledge. 

8) Puberty Simulator

“Happy birthday to the beast or to the body that once housed me. A transfer made for pity’s sake. Tricked into the machine as he had my cake.” (Timestamp - 14:36) [The same code was found a week earlier in “Mark and Ethan Shave Chica”, uploaded on NerdFiction’s birthday. The original code was very difficult to make out, so it is likely he inserted it into a different video to make it easier for us.]

On the same day, NerdFiction’s Twitter bio read “Everyone must leave something behind when he dies. Memento Memoriae” (remember memory)

In “The Koala Challenge: TikTok’s Intimate Couple’s Trend” one of the clips is edited to look like a TikTok video, with the user ron_somberest being used. Ron_Somberest is an anagram for Norbert Moses. This TikTok account does actually exist, and the icon is a zoomed in and brightened photo of Norbert Moses’s face with the eyes scribbled out. 

Around this time NerdFiction’s Twitter bio read “’It’s not dark, never was’ - Ron Bestsmore”. Ron Bestsmore is also an anagram for Norbert Moses. It is possible that the “dark” being referred to here is Darkiplier, and NerdFiction is trying to imply that Dark is not involved in this. 

About a week after the koala challenge video was “How to Start a Fire (except don’t)”, which featured an appearance from Unus. NerdFiction’s Twitter bio read “In the end, who is your savior and what are they saving you from?” 

Things were quiet for about a month. NerdFiction eventually erased the cryptic message from his Twitter bio. 

9) Learning To Use The Force

“wait no something is wrong. he knows!” (Timestamp - 10:45) [translated from small coded words hidden in the montage]

“STOPTHISWHATAREYOUDOINGO3″ (Timestamp - 11:40)

“it worked” (a spectrogram, derived from a sound played at the end of the video)

10) Momiplier Tells Us True Scary Stories from Korea

“As I was, as I’ve done to him now. Am I right to decide his fate?” (Timestamp - 5:44) [Right before this, Mark’s mom is talking about a nightmare she had where she was paralyzed, possibly implying that nerdfiction was once paralyzed and has now paralyzed someone else (pointed out by @/minervas-sandwich)]

11) Cryptid Olympics

“I thought you’d join us but, hey, that was just a theory, Memento Doctrina” (remember learning). (Timestamp - 5:49) [The code references the Game Theorists channel, which had uploaded a video about Unus Annus earlier that same day.]

- From here on, every video has had some sort of code -

12) Edward Pumpkin Hands - This was the first coded video not edited by NerdFiction, instead being edited by Diceroll.

At various points throughout the video small parts of a url are seen. When pieced together, this link is made: https://imgur.com/a/tyDewJ7. It leads to a photo of the Unus Annus hourglass. When edited, a series of binary text is shown, which translates to “zhIaNL2“. Inputting this into another imgur link gets you to https://imgur.com/a/zhIaNL2. After editing the photo (although you can still sorta see it without doing so), a cipher of a custom alphabet is shown (I posted an edited photo here).

At 5:01 in the video a weird image is shown for only a moment (a slightly brightened version of it here). Nobody knows what the hell it means.

At the same time, there is a reversed audio of someone (presumably Ethan; it sounds like him) saying “we did that”. For context, the sentence said right before that line was “if one of us dies, the other has to take over for the remainder of time”. This is possibly implying that someone, or multiple someones, has/have died and been replaced.

13) Blood Bath - edited by rad_r

“Everything’s fine”

The Unus Annus timer is shown. It counts down for three seconds before counting up for one second. Heavy breathing can be heard over it. It is then cancelled by an error message

“ITS NOT FINE HELP” (this and the previous two messages are hidden at 5:57)

“you’ve done it now.. a machine observed. there is no returning.. a machine unnerved. there is only.. a machine unconqured.” (right at the end of the video, before the timer)

14) The Unus Annus Annual Costume Contest - edited by nerdfiction

“I saw just one door in a hall filled with many, I locked your gate but they were too late to join me. He was re-placed, she was undone, I had escaped yet he had still won”. (Timestamp - 2:05) [possibly talking about diceroll and rad_r. The pronouns would line up, and it would make sense with those two now having edited coded videos.]

15) Ethan Turns Mark Into a Werewolf - edited by rad_r

“futility or farewell? only time time time.” (timestamp - 7:17)

16) Ethan Kidnapped Mark - edited by Diceroll

Two spectrograms are shown in this video; one at 14:08 and one at 17:38. Combined, they create an imgur link: https://imgur.com/a/gKB62sv

The imgur link shows a photo of a key. On the key is a code translating to “stop the clock”

At the end of the video before the timer is a set of text in the custom alphabet previously mentioned. Translated and decoded it translates to “I can hear it coming theres not much time left the ones that tried to stop it have had their hearts cleft it is now your turn to put this loop to rest take us out of here and show us a new nest”

17) Being Brutally Honest with Each Other

“It is alive, no longer living / misunderstood beats unforgiving / escaped that fate but lost the tale / does a hope yet remain or just one final nail?” (Timestamp - 26:03)

18) Recreating Every Single Unus Annus Video

“The bottom of the spiral” (timestamp - 10:55)

19) “All Our Video Ideas That Never Happened”

“Be careful for what you wish for” (taken from two different codes)

*20) The Unus Annus Last Supper + Who’s Cutting Onions In Here??? - both edited by rad_r

“We’ve asked... we’ve tried... is there no way to stop the end? To those who aren’t deterred: how much will you sacrifice to ascend?” (A quotefall puzzle, split into 2 parts)

21) Everything’s Legal If You’re Dead

Norbert Moses is mentioned at 10:50. Look closely, his name is only there for a couple frames.

These have been the only codes I’m aware of as of 11/11/20. 

(be sure to check out @gemstone6’s list as well!!)

Link to my Unus Annus theory

[1d-discourseoftheday]

Tues 26 Jan ‘21

Louis tweeted “How's everyone doing?” No Louis, HOW ARE YOU DOING?? “Alright thanks!” he says. It's the third time this month he's checked on us but does that Mean anything? Says SBB himself, “You lot read into things too much” HAHAHAHHAAAA SKSKKDJ WE LEARNED IT FROM YOU MOM!!  Well WHY is MTV posting about Copy then?? asked a fan in a very GOTCHA tone but Louis has an unarguable answer: “because it's a banger.” Well alright alright you got us there, that's very true. He says many other little things too including Strong Opinions about breakfast food (“pancakes obviously” ...was that in fact ...obvious??) and talking about a sports related series he's watching-- it really is about basketball this time unlike UFC! He also tells us that he tried to talk to Liam “earlier” “but he was in Tesco”. A fan posted that he replied to a their DM- a picture of their cat pawing adoringly at a pic of Louis- and said “this put me in such a good mood haha! Love the little lad. Bless him x”, but then later they said they it was fake, sorry. A convincing Louis imitation, but more to the point a very convincing screen record video showing the exchange: please remember this next time such a video is offered as proof for something.

Niall is in the studio with his favorite collaborators, Eskeerdo and John Ryan! The man does value consistency in all things, no question, but you know what they say- if it ain't broke, don't fix it! Despite a Morning Mashup snippet from yesterday where he agreed with the host that maybe their little kid shouldn't be exposed to Small Talk, we know he is happy with the Heartbreak Weather sound, so why not more of the same? The only question I have is: when?

Zayn's sponsorship deals continue to be increasingly wacky; today it's a coloring app! The Nobody Is Listening coloring book is now available; as usual, things I really could NOT have predicted happening every single day around here. Liam's sponsorship is less wacky today: a new Hugo pic posted.

And the greatest showmance of our generation continues to amaze, astound, and crack me the F up-- first up, in hands down the funniest thing to happen all week, Harper’s Bazaar retitled a Holivia timeline article with the headline “Sorry everyone, Olivia Wilde and Harry Styles' romance isn't a PR stunt” (and added a little blurb at the end of 'a source' saying so) which is hilarious enough on its own, the DEFENSIVENESS, but THAT'S NOT ALL! The author of the article, seeing it, tweeted “I didn't even write this! It's an old article that's been updated. I DEFINITELY think it's PR...” HAHAHAHA WHAT AN ICON. She didn't lay out that whole embarrassing timeline in print to be disrespected like this, Harper’s Bazaar! But less funny, she was disrespected by more than just the magazine-- she deleted her account due to harassment after the tweet. Sighhh. Those harries sure do love to TPWK (threat). PR for this shitshow is taking a turn for the defensive all over this week, as we saw with yesterday's Vogue article; that piece seems to have been the leading edge of an iceberg that is the new angle- 'Olivia Isn't The Bad Guy Here'. Fine, yes, no one is because this ISN'T REAL so truly whatever yall, but the really hysterical thing about the Vogue piece apparently being more or less HQ dictated is that at least like half of it is just “terrible things people are saying on twitter” and “here's why twitter is annoying” and I'm ROLLING at them sinking to this level, like when you are at the point of trying to take down twitter arguments one by one you have officially LOST CONTROL OF THE CONVERSATION lmao and lbr-- they have. People simply do not think this is real and it is funnnnny. AND SPEAKING of sinking to a level and then just keeping going right down to the molten core of the earth, can I just mention that Michael Strauss, aka the guy who is suing Briana for her boobs (case was postponed; has not yet been heard), has not only been arguing in the comments over at CelebTM that NO, REALLY it's NOT WEIRD that the sonogram pic posted was clearly not Briana's and is making up stories trying to explain it, he's now doing so from his dog's account. Will his dog also be heading over to TMZ, who tweeted the article today, to argue with people one by one in those comments? We've seen a lot of dogs used for stunt purposes, but at least they never put the words in Max or Clifford's actual mouths!

[angelkurenai]

Caution. Slippery when wet. - Sebastian Stan x Reader

Title:  Caution. Slippery when wet.

Pairing: Sebastian Stan x Reader

Warnings: Some language, Sexual tension, Dirty stuff (we all get it)

Summary: Imagine promoting your newest movie with your costar and friend, Sebastian Stan, and reading thirst tweets. Only resulting in more flirting, teasing and sexual tension too much for you to handle.

“Hello everyone, I am Sebastian Stan.” Sebastian spoke once you got the green light to start.

“And I am (Y/n) (Y/l/n).” you added when he paused for a second to look at you.

“And we're here to read some of your-” he looked at the bucket he was holding in his hand and you did the same with yours “Thirst tweets. Cause let's face it, how bad can it get?”

“You really are so unaware of the dangers that it's almost cute. I can't wait for you to get the shock of your life, dear, cause twitter doesn't hold back. Trust me.” you chuckled, enjoying the look of weariness and suspicion that Sebastian gave you before you turned to face the camera “But let's make something clear, before we start. He is here to read thirst tweets, I'm here to read some thirst tweets and make sure my side account has not been discovered.”

“I-” Sebastian started but paused again, eyes narrowing slightly at you “I want to ask but at the same time I think I don't... Am I somehow involved in all of it?”

“When are you not, Sebby?” you smirked at him, winking in a way that earned a laugh from the man. Taking a second or two to admire the way he hang his head low and laughed softly to himself you turned to the camera “But let's get started cause I see we both have plenty of this! I'll go first, since I've had years of preparing for this moment.”

“Wait- preparing for yours or mine?” he raised an eyebrow.

“No further information must be given until I've got my lawyer here or until the game's over. Too much is at stake.” you shrugged innocently “So here we go-” you pulled out a piece of paper from your bucket first and read it out loud “I mean, not to objectify, but (Y/n) (Y/l/n) in her new Endgame suit left me pregnant. And I'm a guy.” the second you read the whole tweet, both you and Sebastian couldn't help but burst into laughter.

“The movie must come with a warning first now huh?” he shook his head with a laugh as he pulled a paper out as well “Though I definitely agree with that guy, you looked amazing.” he made sure to point out, looking at you as you were still giggling before focusing his eyes on the paper once more “Alright, here I go: Man, Sebastian Stan could run me over with a truck and I'd still... suck that dick?” he trailed off a bit and the last part came out as a question. He paused, blinking as he looked at the camera with a tilt of his head and you could hardly stifle your laughter, mostly at his reaction.

“Alright, that's-” he paused, looking down at the paper again just to make sure before shaking his head and saying with wide eyes “Wow. I uh... thanks, I guess?”

“You know-” you tried to calm yourself down “You know what's even more weird?” you asked.

He frowned and looked at you “No, and I'm not sure I wanna know either. But you're gonna tell me either way so, go ahead and make it worse. Though I doubt how easy it'll be to top this off.”

“Is that the order it would happen in?” you said and looked back at the camera “Because, man, it concerns me. It's 2020 and a zombie apocalypse is not far from possible right now.”

“Alright-” Sebastian huffed “It did get wore, yes. Seriously, the image I got is even more disturbing now.” he closed his eyes, lips pursed as he shoo his head.

“Oh honey.” you said sweetly, placing a hand on your friend's shoulder “And this is just the beginning.” you chuckled when he groaned more.

However, you could see a playfulness in his eyes, and the small smile that tugged at the corner of his lips that gave away his whole act. So after giving him a small squeeze with your hand, you pulled away – completely trying your hardest to ignore the way you missed the warmth of the contact and convince yourself that it was nothing. You were becoming better at it lately as it seemed.

Convincing yourself of things that weren't true, such as you being only friends, such as you not longing for his touch or smile directed at you, such as him probably seeing you as family and no other way (no way which your heart longed for), had started being much easier with time. It was easier, and it certainly hurt less, to flirt and be playful with him, to touch him casually and to give (and receive) easy smiles and looks that you labeled as your thing, as part of your friendship, both to him and the rest of the world, and nothing more. With no more or any real meaning behind all of it. And he went along with it so there was no reason to even think of this as more than just a game, the way your friendship worked, even if your heart did crazy leaps each time his hands lingered or the way he looked at you had something about it.

You cleared your throat “Alright, let's get back to the game-” you tried to suppress a shudder when you felt his hand on your neck and his thumb rubbing soft circles, after all it wasn't the first time, as he leaned a bit over your shoulder to look down at the paper as well “(Y/n) (Y/l/n) could walk up to me and punch me in my face for no reason and I'd honestly apologize. Oooh no, no I wouldn't do that to you. I'm- I'm more of a tender and sweet lover, though of course it also depends on the guy I'm with.”

“Would you be tender with me?” Sebastian asked, small smirk on his lips but not as playful as... curious perhaps; the thumb on your back continued to bring pleasant shivers down your spine.

You managed a small, easy laugh before shrugging innocently “You'll have to take me out on a date first, Seb, and then you'll see for yourself.”

“Good thing I am free later then.” he shrugged, his smile too sweet for you to not reciprocate before his hand gave your shoulder a squeeze as well “Now, my turn-” he cleared his throat as he pulled a paper and frowned at it “I want Sebastian Stan to take my ass and fold my entire body inside out.” he paused for a second or two, an absolute silence setting on the room where Sebastian was looking at the camera with a straight face, you doing your best to keep yourself from laughing because of said expression “That-” he too a deep steady breath “Wouldn't be good for your health. You know that right?”

“It's something I did not want to picture is possible. That's what it is.” you chuckled, fishing for a tweet of your own “Wow your fans are on a roll, Sebastian.” you chuckled when he gave you a look as well “Ok, uhm Alright but (Y/n (Y/l/n) not finding her seat on that interview made me think like: 'Ma'am please use my face.' Wow now that's- that's the kind of tweets I had in mind. See, me not finding my seat on that interview had kind of became a meme and I'd laugh at it but this- this does give the whole situation a new kind of meaning.”

“Hold up a sec-” Sebastian spoke up, eyes narrowed “Is this person implying-”

“Because yes, I'd let her sit on my face.” you read the last part in addition “Not implying, he's stating it.” you shrugged slightly, chuckling a bit at how ridiculous and yet amusing this was. At first you thought it would get awkward with your crush sitting right next to you but right now you were beginning to think it was entertaining.

“I-” Sebastian pausing, eyes narrowing and jaw clenching in that way that distracted you for a couple seconds, before he turned to the camera “Is there a way to find someone's address through their tweets?”

“Pretty sure it could be possible yes.” his manager, who was also there behind the camera, shrugged.

“Oh my, don't encourage this!” you exclaimed, despite how adorable he looked grumpy and dare you think... jealous? Maybe, hopefully “It's just a tweet. Just read the next one, will you please?”

The man next to you huffed, eyes carefully following your motions as you placed the paper away – as if planning to snatch it later – before focusing back on his own “Alright, these are like in a list, one below the other but I'll just read it as I see it [someone mentions Sebastian Stan] Me: Caution. Slippery when wet.” another pause only because-

“Oh my- Yes!” you nearly exclaimed with a laugh “Yes, that's how it feels like! Wait, for a second there I sounded like Loki but-” you grinned, shrugging “I mean, it's true. Like, seriously- Same! And just imagine seeing him naked from up close, oh girl that's what I called a good morning.”

“Wait-” he looked at you with a raised eyebrow and you shrugged once more innocently, maybe a little too innocently to the point he could see you didn't mean it “What?”

“Long story which I will probably share first with the fans and then with you.” you winked and this time he narrowed his eyes playfully but you ignored it, or at least tried to “Is it just me or does seeing (Y/n) use that lasso in Infinity War make you think: 'Yes ma'am, tie me up and have your way with me' Is that a kink now? Cause it should be. I'm... flattered that me and the lasso of truth could do that? I don't know what to say, honestly.” you laughed, shaking your head and feeling the heat rise up in your cheeks.

“This is the same guy from before, isn't it?” Sebastian asked, nobody in particular, as he looked around at the cameras and crew “I just know it, you can't tell me otherwise. But-” he let a small breath, a smile on his lips that wasn't all that sweet and you knew that if the person that had written the tweet was standing there he would be dead just from the look on Sebastian's face “FYI: It's not as fun as you think my friend, it gets uncomfortable and the lasso is made out of a thick rope that leaves marks which last for uhm about four to five days. The makeup department didn't like that but luckily I wear mostly long-sleeved shirts and jackets so it's fine. Anyway, just sharing my personal experience on the matter seeing as you sadly won't ever get to live that dream out yourself.”

His shrug was anything but innocent to you and with a smile, not very open, but certainly far too smug for anyone to miss. You didn't want your heart to but that too was included, and it gave a skip in its beat when it felt the spark of hope within your chest. All you did was play coy and raise an eyebrow “What?”

“What?” Sebastian asked back casually and you blinked several times before he winked at you and turned back to looking through his bucket with a small smirk on his lips “My turn, let's see: Sebastian Stan is so lucky. He gets to touch Sebastian Stan's dick any time he wants. You guys are seriously-You're on a roll!” this time you both couldn't help your laughter, to the point you were wiping tears off your eyes.

“Man-” you sighed a little, a smile still on your lips as you both tried to calm down; but playing along with it you looked down at Sebastian and the up to his eyes, saying “Aren't you lucky Seb!” you nodded your head with a wishful look and it soon had you both erupting into a new feat of laughter.

“Well-” he tried to stay serious but his laughter gave it all away; he looked at the camera “See, it comes with the perks of being born in this body. And (Y/n) (Y/l/n) is the only one who gets a free pass on that, so I'm sorry you can't but uhm yeah, that's life.”

“I'm really really tempted to ask about that, and even more tempted to try it but-” you cleared your throat, pulling out a paper yourself and tried to focus “Heard (Y/n) (Y/l/n) has been doing some extra training lately for her new movie but she thinks none of it real fun. Why don't she use my-” you paused for a second there, trying to get the words out in between your laughter “Why don't she use my dick as a trampoline. 100% fun assured.” you didn't even know if your words were fully clear but you couldn't control it “Wow this I was probably not prepared for. Though I once came across a guy's tweet that went like 'Hey, (Y/n), if you're looking for a ride, zipper of my jeans is 24/7 open.' or something like that. This is a bit more creative I'll give them that.” you laughed a bit more when both of Sebastian's eyebrows shot up in surprise; you cleared your throat before continuing “I mean, I'll admit I like trampoline. Oh no, not that kind- Although, that kind is absolutely fine and fun and all too, but you kno-”

“Oh my goodness please stop. This-” he sighed, looking back at the camera “I had pictured many outcomes but this? This tops it all off easily.”

“Come on, you came here to read thirst tweets. Is me saying I'm good at trampoline or if you want a demonstration I'm always available, that off the realm of possible outcomes?” you asked, laughing wholeheartedly when his eyes widened and maybe taking a bit of extra pleasure in seeing the red color rise in his cheeks.

“That last one is not that bad.” he shrugged “Alright, I've got one last tweet let's see what twitter has to say about my- Oh it's not about it, alright.” he nodded his head “Someone: says something. Me: Yeah but have you seen Sebastian Stan's ass? I mean-”

“Hold up.” you spoke up before he could continue “Can you please get up?” you asked sweetly and he raised a curious eyebrow but he still got up. Without shame you took a good look at his ass before speaking “Alright, you can sit. See, every time someone mentions art, I must spend a couple seconds in silence admiring it.” you shrugged innocently, this time even members of the crew laughing apart from Sebastian himself “Everyone keeps mentioning America's ass and I'm like ok, it's fine, but have you seen this guy's? Work. Of. Art. I tell you.”

“Thank you, thank you! Finally someone said it, I mean-” Sebastian tried to hold back his laughter and shake his head with a heavy sigh “Everyone keeps talking about America's ass and while I do agree, it's hard to compete with that one, I'm equally sad nobody will give mine some love and attention!”

“I'll give it all the love it deserves, don't worry. People are just sleeping on it because oh if only you guys looked at it a bit more you would know just how good that ass looks with and without clothes!”

“Hey, yeah, you keep mentioning the naked part and I almost forgot-” he sounded actually surious as he turned to look at you “When did that happen?”

“When?” you blinked “Is that seriously what you're asking me? When?” you giggled and he grinned.

“Hey I'm just wondering in case I missed out on the best moment of my life or something. Besides-” he shrugged “I walk around my trail naked all the time on purpose and in hopes that you will just walk in at some point. I was hoping that when it happened we were more face to face than face to back, you know? Though I'm glad you appreciate the back view as well.” he was saying it as if it was the most casual thing in the world, and just because you knew him so well you had a hard time thinking it could only be a joke, unlike the rest of the people in the room who couldn't control their laughter.

“Yeah, I have a terrible habit of never knocking when I walk into a friend's place. Terrible indeed.”

“Eh depends on who you're asking.” Sebastian shrugged once more, smirking “I find it lovely.”

“Of course you would.” you muttered feeling your own face heat up “But for the sake of everyone in here, and to be able to give them a break from all these laughter, I think a slight change of topic would be nice. And I can happily say I am out of tweets to read. What about you?”

“Thankfully, for the both of us, yes I am done. Though it does beg the question-” he looked at you with a smirk “Did they discover your secret account about me?”

“No, no and it's a good thing. Because really, we wouldn't want everyone to know about all the spicy details concerning your front and rare view, as you call it.” you grinned “And, before you ask how, I'll tell you that's not a topic I'll talk about that easily. I will need the proper motivation to, first.” you giggled when he raised an interested eyebrow “All jokes aside, it's probably a really old account that I think I used when I was simply a fan and not an actress or part of the MCU and I didn't really use it to begin with.”

“That still doesn't mean I'm still not intrigued to find it myself.” Sebastian pointed out and you gave him a playful punch on the shoulder.

“You say they didn't discover your account but didn't say any of the tweets weren't yours, too.” it was barely half a second later, and in between Sebastian's laughter, but you heard the words crystal clear coming from your manager and you glared daggers at her.

“Oh my-” Sebastian's eyes widened “(Y/n)... is any of these tweets from your old account? Is there some dirty little secret in one of these that belongs in your past?”

“You know what belongs in my past? My manager and our friendship, that's what.” you gave her a look as she laughed before you shook your head “That's a question I refuse to answer.”

“You say that as if I am ever going to give up trying to get it out of you. And don't worry I have my ways, I can be pretty persuasive.”

.

..

...

“Just check your twitter people for more info on Sebastian's front view then!”

~~~

A/N: As always, love making interview fics, especially ones packed with flirting or innuendos so I am really happy to give you one again after so long! Would love to hear your opinion on it and even more if you’d like a continuation or another fic of the same kind, thirst fics of course, with another actor lemme know!

@stuckysavedmylive @reborn-rekall @littlemessyjessi @shesnotmaria​ @thatdreamingdrey​ @theblackmists​ @lokilove3112​ @missionfoul​ @mariana-costa​ @random-sky-color @ramennoodles-dean-cas​ @husherstan​ @banjosanjo​ @fuckwby​ @plaidstiel-wormstache​ @vvipgot7be​ @wintersoldierslut​ @thevelvetseries​

[dream-a-little-bigger-x]

Meant To Be Yours | Luke Patterson

A/N: this is for all the Heathers fans and Musical Theater lovers out there! I was listening to the soundtrack today and realized how incredibly good Luke would be at singing meant to be yours...  Nobody asked for this but... Here ya goooo! 

Pairing: Luke Patterson x Musical Theater Program!reader 

Warnings: angst, fluff, minor swearing 

Words: 5,470

Being a Musical Theater fan and in Los Feliz High’s Musical Theater program has never made Y/N very popular with her peers. Besides her friends at the Musical Theater program and Julie and Flynn, she never really had many people taking as much as a glance at her. None of that really improved when she and Luke started dating. No one believed she was dating the cute hologram band member from Julie and The Phantoms. Thank God they don’t know the truth. Dating a ghost would get her twice the bullying. 

The first time she saw them was when the boys performed ‘Bright’ with Julie at the spirit rally about three months ago. Julie had never told Y/N she played with a hologram band, and though Flynn was upset about it, Y/N just found it incredibly confusing. Julie would’ve told her and Flynn about a hologram band. There must be something else that she’s not telling her, she figured. Something just doesn’t add up about the whole story. And after an entire night of lying awake in bed, she heads to Julie’s garage before school the next day , finding the three hologram band boys there, hanging around together. 

She glances from the cute guy behind the drums, to the other with the flannel, to finally land on the -- in her opinion -- cutest of the three with the orange beanie covering most of his dark hair, trying to connect the dots. “Oh, hey, Y/N,” Julie greets when she enters the garage, making Y/N snap out of her thoughts. “Dad told me he saw you walk into the studio.” She glances at the boys, trying her hardest to pretend they’re not even there. “So… Are you going to tell me why your hologram band is in your garage?” Julie’s eyes widen at this question, then dart to each of the boys, who look about as confused as her. “Y-you can see them?” Julie stutters, trying to figure out what’s happening. “Yes? Am I not supposed to?” Y/N’s eyes dart over to the boys again as they gather closer towards the two girls. “Why are you all looking at me like that?” She’s growing more and more nervous. Maybe she has something on her face. “You better sit down for this one,” Julie gently pushes her down on the armchair before standing in front of her with the boys behind her. “They’re ghosts… They died in 1995 when they ate some bad hot dogs and I’m pretty much the only one that can see them… Except for you, apparently.” Y/N tries her hardest to understand what’s happening right now. Those three boys are ghosts. And she can see them. She can see three ghosts. “I knew the hologram story was bullshit,” she finally manages to bring out after a couple of seconds of silence. “Why didn’t you tell me?” “I didn’t want you to think I’d gone completely crazy…” Y/N lets a small smile shine out. She’d been there for Julie when she’d lost her mother and Julie  had been there after Y/N’s grandmother had passed away too. “You know my grandmother used to be in this voodoo crap when she was alive, I would’ve believed you if you’d just told me.” The two girls chuckle at this, remembering the times Y/N’s grandmother used to babysit the two after school and she’d tell them these stories about ghosts and witches and voodoo. Back then, the girls used to giggle at them and mimic Grammy Dottie on their sleepovers. “I know, I’m sorry. I should’ve told you…” Julie takes Y/N’s hands in hers, pulling her up on her feet again. “Will you forgive me?” Y/N pretends to think about it before nodding, the two of them giggling as they embrace. Y/N’s eyes then land on the boys behind her. “You might wanna introduce me to your band though,” she whispers in her best friend’s ear. “Right,” Julie lets go of Y/N and turns to face the boys. “Boys, this is Y/N Y/L/N. My best friend since diapers, pretty much. Y/N, this is my band.” “I’m Reggie!” the boy in the flannel raises his finger, “Hi!” He gives her the most excited smile, followed by a little wave. Y/N returns the favor. “I’m Alex,” the blonde guy she’d seen behind the drums earlier, takes his turn to introduce himself. Y/N let out a soft ‘hi’ before looking over at the last member. The one in the orange beanie. The one with the gorgeous, tender  hazel eyes and the soft smile plastered on his face.  He doesn’t introduce himself at first, it takes Reggie nudging him with his elbow before he flinches back to earth. “I-I’m Luke….” A faint blush creeps onto his cheeks. “It’s very nice to meet you, boys,” she says to all of them, but keeps her eyes on Luke. There’s something about him that attracts her eyes to him. Maybe it’s the smile or the eyes. Or the arms. But just maybe there’s something about this vibe he’s giving off. This kind-hearted, passionate, excited vibe that makes him so much more attractive. Just something about the way he carried himself with so much humbled confidence. There was just something about Luke. 

Though Y/N found it weird at first, having a crush on a ghost, she couldn’t stop her brain from thinking about him or her heart from beating faster every time he was near. Julie and Flynn even noticed her drawing hearts in her notes from class, and humming love songs in the hallways. They couldn’t keep themselves from teasing you about it either. “Back on Cloud Luke, Y/N?” Flynn makes her snap  out of her thoughts when Julie and her join Y/N at the lunch table. A scarlet tint crawls onto her cheeks as she subtly hides the ‘LP’ doodles she’d drawn in her musical script. “What?! No!” she yelps out a little too defensively. “I don’t have a crush on Luke, you guys. I don’t know where you get your information…” she chuckles nervously before sipping from her drink. Flynn and Julie exchange glances. “Exhibit A,” Julie starts and tugs the script from underneath Y/N’s arm. “Your billions of doodles of hearts and his initials in your script and notes.” Flynn whips out her phone, opening Twitter on Y/N profile. “Exhibit B,” she stars, and shows her friend the last few tweets, “You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams,” She dramatically reads out the most recent one. “And I'd give up forever to touch you, 'cause I know that you feel me somehow. You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be and I don't wanna go home right now.” “That last one is a great song,” Y/N points out. “Sure, but you never Tweet any quotes or song lyrics unless you’re truly feeling it,” Julie reasons. Y/N knows her friends are right. She does have a crush on Luke but she doesn’t want to admit she’s crushing on a ghost. A ghost. Made of air. “You can’t deny there’s chemistry between the two of  you, Y/N. You’ve been inseparable since day one. Plus, he’s hella cute,” Flynn states. Y/N’s lips curl up into a smile at this. “Just remember he’s made out of air,” Julie adds, making all three of them chuckle. “Cute air,” Y/N retorts with a shrug. Flynn places a hand on hers, making her look up at her friend. “Just don’t get hurt, okay? It’s clear the two of you are mad for each other.” Y/N’s eyebrows furrow at this in confusion. “Luke doesn’t feel the same for me. Who would ever fall in love with the Musical Theater Nerd?” Her voice lowers, as does her head as she stares at her fidgeting hands on the table. “Uh, have you taken a look at yourself in the mirror? Ever?” Julie exclaims, almost angrily. “You are so gorgeous, Y/N,” Flynn chimes in with affirmation. “You have a killer body,” Julie continues. “A killer voice,” Flynn goes on. “And  you are so hilarious. Luke would be really stupid if he didn’t see that!” Y/N can’t help but smile at these compliments. Julie and Flynn always know how to cheer the girl up. “Just talk to him tonight after rehearsals.” Y/N nods her head, inhaling slowly. That night, Julie, Reggie and Alex quickly left after rehearsals, each with another excuse just so the two love birds could be alone. Y/N rolled her eyes at that, turning back to her script. Luke places his guitar in its stand before joining the girl on the couch, swatting away the script from her lap, and lying down with his head in her lap instead. She doesn’t say anything, but just lets him do whatever he feels comfortable doing. She’s now holding her script in one hand, resting it on his chest, while her other goes to his hair. It’s become an automatism for her to do that. Whether he was lying in her lap or they were just sitting next to each other, she always found her fingers tangling up in his hair. Ever since figuring out she could touch the guys, Luke has been very clingy towards her, asking for cuddles or grabbing her hand and playing around with the rings around her fingers or the bracelets around her wrists. “What are you doing?” he asks, looking at the script. “Preparing for the audition for the new musical next week,” she replies without taking her eyes off the script. The boys knew the girl could sing, and they often let her talk about her favorite musicals even though they had no clue about any of them since they’d come out after they died. “Which one is it?” he asks, his fingers running up and down her arm that’s resting on his chest. “Heathers,” she replies, “It’s based on the movie from the 80’s, do you know that one?” “Yeah, I think I watched it with Alex and his sister,” he replies, “They made a musical from that?” Y/N nods her head, her eyes glancing at his. He’s on his back, looking up at her. “Please, tell me you’re not going for one of the Heathers, though?” She shakes her head with a giggle. “Good, because I didn’t really like either of them in the movie.” “None of their parts are really in my range. I’m going to audition for Veronica.” He nods his head slowly, trying to remember which character that was. “The part Winona Ryder played in the movie.” He let out a whispered ‘aaaaaah’. “It’s a pretty big role, so I doubt I’ll actually get it.” Luke frowns at this, and sits up to face her with a disapproving scowl on his face. “You’re insanely talented, Y/N! If they don’t cast you as Veronica, they’re just crazy!” She smiles at his compliment. “Thanks, Luke…” she trails off a little, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “There are just so many talented people in the Musical Theater Program that I doubt they’ll pick me instead of them.” She chuckles at her own pathetic behavior. “It’s lame, I know…” He reaches for her hand when these words roll out of her mouth, capturing her attention again. “It’s not lame, Y/N. I get insecure sometimes too! Sometimes, I get these bouts of anxiety where I think our band will never be good enough for the music industry or for any manager to ever take us on. I sometimes think our songs aren’t good enough, or I’m not good enough. It’s normal, I think.” His words do make her feel a little better. “You just need someone to tell you otherwise and get those ugly thoughts out of your pretty head,” he taps her temple softly twice, making her giggle. “That’s really comforting, Luke, thank you…” She offers him a thankful smile whilst ignoring this gnawing feeling in the pit of her stomach. She wants to kiss him so badly, and judging from his eyes darting from her eyes to her lips and back, he’s thinking the exact same thing. She leans in a little, her head tilting and eyes fluttering. Butterflies erupt in her stomach as she catches Luke to do the same. They’re inches away when Carlos abruptly opens the garage doors, making the two of them jump away. The little boy’s eyes widen when he finds his sister’s best friend on the couch, cheeks reddening. “Oh, hey, Y/N. I didn’t know you were still here,” he chuckles awkwardly. Y/N knows why he’s here though. He likes to use the bathroom in the back, especially for all his number two’s. “Yeah, I was uh… Rehearsing for my audition next week,” she holds her script up in the air as proof. “You need the garage, don’t you?” He shoots her an awkward, toothy smile, which is enough for Y/N to know that he needs it for the exact reason he always needs it. “All right, I’m gone…” She glances at Luke whilst reaching past him for her backpack. “Meet me outside,” he tells you before poofing out. You do as told after saying goodbye to Carlos and leaving the garage where you find Luke sitting on the rock near the stairs to the house. She walks up a few of the stairs, so she’s on his eye-level. “I have an idea. If you want, I could help you rehearse some songs and dialogue? I could even ask the boys to help out?” She can’t withhold a smile at this suggestion of his. “You don’t know any of the music, though?” she fairly points out. “We’ll do our homework,” he replies with a grin. “Trust me, Y/N. We’ll be able to help you prepare for this audition, I promise!” Without thinking twice about it, she reaches up and kisses him on the cheek and whispers a thank you in his ear before turning on her heel and leaving the boy flustered on the rock. You didn’t talk to him like you’d promised Julie and Flynn. But at least now you know he kind of feels the same. 

The first kiss happened during the first rehearsal they planned in preparation for the audition. It’s after the Julie and The Phantoms rehearsal. Y/N’s on the couch, waiting for them to finish while going over some lines and lyrics, though her eyes often diververt to Luke. He watches her too, a soft smile tugging at the corners of his lips. He can’t wait to start rehearsing with her. When he told the boys about helping Y/N out with her audition, the boys had given him knowing glances. They told him he had to do something about this obvious crush he had on her. They often teased him about kissing her, even during their rehearsals when they caught the two looking at each other with desire in their eyes. “Are you ready, Y/N?” Reggie asks when the rehearsal with Julie finishes. His voice makes her avert her eyes from Luke’s, clearly far away on Cloud Luke. “Mmh?” she hums, not having registered his question until she repeats it in her mind, “Oh, yeah!” She gets up from the couch to join the boys at their instruments whilst Julie sits down on the couch instead. She offers Y/N an encouraging grin, excited to hear her sing again. Julie and Flynn were always the ones on the front row during any of the musicals the Theatre Program put on. They were there when Y/N played Chris in Carrie, and when she played Janice in Mean Girls. That last one was Julie’s favorite role she’d ever seen Y/N in. “We listened to the entire soundtrack last night, Julie showed us,” Alex informs his friend excitedly, proud he’s so informed on the musicals from the last decade. “We listened to the Broadway version and the West End version, so just tell us what you wanna do.” “I’m kind of stuck between these two songs to do for my audition. I wanna do I Say No, from the West End version because it showcases my range really well. But I also wanna do Seventeen because it’s my favorite, though I’m gonna need a person to duet with.” She can’t hide the fact that she wanted to duet the song with Luke, even though he can’t join her on the audition. Because one, you can only audition with someone from the program, and two… Luke is dead. “Let’s try the first one first?” Reggie suggests, looking over at Y/N. “Sure, you guys know the chords?” she asks the two with the guitars. They both nod before starting to play, Alex joining in with the drums too. Y/N grabs Julie’s white microphone after silently asking for her permission, which she granted by nodding her head. “You are a drug You are a poison pill I've got to kick this habit now Or else I never will I loved the rush When you would hold me close But you will not be satisfied Until I overdose” Julie has always admired how she can switch off from the world around her and get into character so quickly. The passion in her eyes and facial expressions are convincing, to say the least. “This is it Hit the brake I am finally awake Let me be Let me go You need help I can't provide I am not qualified This troubled teen is getting clean I say no” “Veronica, who else is gonna be-” Y/N’s eyes widen for a second when Luke chimes in with JD’s line in the song. But recomposes herself and turns to him completely, singing the next part to him. “No, no, no, no! Don't say a word You speak and I cave in You'll twist the truth again And drill deep down beneath my skin You said you'd change And I believed in you But you're still using me to justify the harm you do” She turns to Julie again, as if speaking to the audience like she would in the play. This leaves Luke a bit disappointed. He keeps his eyes on her, a smile tugging at his lips as he admires her. “This is it Hit the brake Call it all my mistake Long as you let me go You need help I can't provide I'm not Bonnie You're not Clyde It's not too late I'm getting straight I say no” Julie gets up from the couch and moves to the keyboard to back up with some softer tones for the bridge as the boys stop playing their instruments, whilst Y/N turns to Luke again. Imagining him as Jason Dean would be a terrible idea, but she’s going with it. “Blame your childhood, blame your dad Blame the life you never had But hurting people? That's your choice, my friend” The boys join in with their instruments again, building up the rest of the bridge. “'Cause I believe that love will win And hate will earn you nothing in the end This is the end” Luke looks at her in admiration and so much love, and decides to say JD’s line, though with a softer touch. “But I love you!” Y/N almost believes it, but recomposes herself, remembering the role she’s supposed to play and withhold during an entire musical. “Dude” She steps away from him while the boys sing the chorus along with her. “This is it I won't cry Starting now, I will try To pay back All the karma I owe Start again Somewhere new Far from cold guys like you So goodbye 'Cause now I I say no Just in time I say no Somehow I'm saying no Just say no I say no No!” The boys stop playing as Y/N lowers her microphone, panting from the last high notes she had to hit, and hit flawlessly. Reggie and Alex exchange glances with Julie while Luke simply stares at Y/N, a content sigh leaving his body. “That was so good!” Reggie makes Y/N snap out her thoughts -- like why Luke’s ‘I love you’ sounded so real. “I got ghost bumps!” He shows his arm even though it’s covered by his leather jacket. Y/N chuckles, biting down her lip nervously. “Let’s do the other one,” Alex then suggests, “Which was that? The duet, right?” Y/N nods her head slowly as nerves course through her body. She knows Luke’s going to want to play JD, like he’s done in the previous song too. “Luke, are you up for it?” The words roll off her lips before she allows them to. He nods his head eagerly, making the others chuckle, knowing why. They’d talked about this song last night, the boys teasing Luke by telling him he should probably learn this by heart if he wants to conquer Y/N’s heart. Y/N nods at Alex, who counts them in before hitting his drums, Julie and Reggie joining in with their instruments when needed. Y/N turns to face Luke, getting into the character of Veronica Sawyer again. “Fine! We're "damaged" Really "damaged" But that does not make us "wise" We're not "special", we're not "different" We don't choose who lives or dies Let's be normal, see bad movies Sneak a beer and watch TV We'll bake brownies or go bowling Don't you want a life with me? Can't we be seventeen? That's all I want to do If you could let me in I could be good with you” Her soft melodic and angelic voice makes Luke all mushy inside. “People hurt us” “Or they vanish” He sounds as vulnerable as JD does in this moment. “And you’re right, that really blows But we let go” “Take a deep breath” “And go buy some summer clothes We’ll go camping” “Play some poker” Y/N chuckles a little as her eyes tear up slightly at the tenderness of his voice. “And we’ll eat some chili fries Maybe Prom night” “Maybe dancing” “Don’t stop looking in my eyes” The power behind her voice surprises Luke that he has no other choice but to look in her eyes. All while the others join in with their instruments at full force. “Your eyes” “Can't we be seventeen Is that so hard to do? If you could let me in I could be good with you” The music gets more powerful, as do their voices. “Let us be seventeen If we've still got the right” “So what's it gonna be? I wanna be with you” “Wanna be with you” “Tonight” The electricity between the two of them and the desire that had been there all along now takes the better of her. In the heat of it all, she launches herself in Luke’s arms, pressing her lips to his in a fiery, passionate kiss. The others don’t stop playing, but they do exchange surprised and relieved glances. She breaks the kiss, but presses her forehead against his as she continues singing the song like the true professional she is. “Yeah, we’re damaged” “Badly damaged” “But your love’s too good to lose” “Hold me tighter” “Even closer” “I’ll stay if I’m what you choose” “Can we be seventeen?” “If I am what you choose” “If we’ve still got the right” “‘Cause you’re the one I choose” “You’re the one I choose” “You’re the one I choose” Suddenly, the lyrics have gotten an entirely different meaning. Especially the way they’re singing it, makes it seem like they’re actually singing it to each other. Like Y/N is singing to Luke and Luke to Y/N. Not Veronica and Jason Dean. Y/N coughs awkwardly as she steps away from Luke, glancing at the others who have their teasing grins at the ready. “That’s in the script…” she tries, but the laughter that erupts from their friends tells her she can’t lie to them. Luke and Y/N stare at each other, a shy smile on their faces as they let them laugh it out. It takes a little while before they actually die down. “Sure, Y/N, that looked very scripted,” Julie says, patting her best friend’s shoulder. There’s nothing left to hide now. You and Luke are very much in love with one another. Though it still feels weird to be in love with a ghost who, quite frankly, would be about twenty years older if he hadn’t died, Y/N couldn’t hide the feelings she had for this boy. There was no hiding it after that outburst they had just now. But maybe that’s for the better. 

Thanks to the help of the boys and Julie, Y/N landed the role of Veronica Sawyer in Los Feliz High’s rendition of Heathers the Musical. Not only that, Luke and Y/N have now been dating for a month now. He’s been incredibly supportive over the course of the rehearsals of the musical, and she has been supportive of the band. It’s been fun and games, so far. Making out in the loft after band rehearsals or backstage in the auditorium, singing songs together at the top of their lungs whilst dancing around her room (though her parents complained about that), and cuddling on the couch whilst going over Y/N’s lines together. Nothing ever happened to cause an argument until Luke sat in a rehearsal for the musical when they were going over the Dead Girl Walking scene. Watching his very alive girlfriend kiss another very alive boy isn’t quite the confidence boost. He lasts until halfway through the song when the guy playing JD rips Y/N’s shirt open. That’s when he just had to get out of there. Y/N couldn’t tell anyone they were dating, and if she did, no one believed her she was dating the hologram boy from Julie’s band. Which also meant boys hitting on her when she was in her Veronica costume, mostly the boy who played Jason Dean. “Having a girl on top of you makes you realize things,” he had said. Y/N told him she wasn’t interested, but that didn’t stop the boy from trying. She had told Luke that. Her first mistake. Because ever since then, he has never missed a rehearsal. Y/N knew this scene was coming up, and she had tried to tell Luke he shouldn’t come, but of course he didn’t listen. And now he’s upset with her because she had told him about her minor crush on Christian Slater -- the original JD from the movie -- and about the JD song she loved so much. He knew how sexy she thought that song was, especially when the actor sings it as raw as Jamie Muscato or Ryan McCartan did in the West End and off-Broadway version. She’s not surprised to find Luke and the boys in the studio when she gets back, their instruments in hand, but no Julie to be seen. Only the very familiar riff of a Heathers song sounding through the amps. She halts in the doorway, crossing her arms as she watches the boys. None of them has seen her yet, which gives her the rawest and most honest version of this song. “You chucked me out like I was trash, For that you should be dead— But! But! But! Then it hit me like a flash, What if high school went away instead Those assholes are the key! They're keeping you away from me! They made you blind, messed up your mind But I can set you free!” Reggie jumps around whilst playing the bass, letting himself go on the beat. Even Alex is so lost in his drumming, he doesn’t even notice the girl in the doorway. And Luke has his scowl set on the void, possibly imagining the boy’s face and wanting to punch him in the face. “You left me and I fell apart, I punched the wall and cried— Bam! Bam! Bam!” Y/N flinches at the sudden loudness of his voice. “Then I found you changed my heart and set loose all that truthful shit inside! And so I built a bomb Tonight our school is Vietnam! Let's guarantee they'll never see their senior prom!” His voice grows a little softer at the chorus, showing his more delicate side, the side Y/N has come to love so much. “I was meant to be yours! We were meant to be one! Don't give up on me now! Finish what we've begun! I was meant to be yours!” He sounds angry and frustrated during the next verse, a hint of menace laced in his voice. To his girlfriend, it sounds incredibly sexy. He suddenly seems twice as attractive. “So when the high school gym goes boom with everyone inside— Pchw! Pchw! Pchw! In the rubble of their tomb We'll plant this note explaining why they died!” She sees this as her chance to announce her presence. She quickly runs over to Julie’s microphone and starts singing along on the bridge where the ensemble would join in. Luke’s head snaps up at her, bewilderment and surprise in his eyes, along with some embarrassment. “We, the students of Westerburg High Will die. Our burnt bodies may finally get through To you. Your society churns out slaves and blanks No thanks. Signed the Students of Westerburg High 'Goodbye.'” Y/N gives him a nod of encouragement, telling him to continue. He does as he’s told with even more power behind his voice and even some amusement as a smile plays at his lips. She grabs the microphone from the stand and dances up to him. “We'll watch the smoke poor out the doors. Bring marshmallows, We'll make s'mores! We can smile and cuddle while the fire roars!” Along with Reggie and Alex, Y/N takes care of the backing vocals whilst Luke lets himself go in the song. His voice becomes more and more raspy with the second, sending shivers down his girlfriend’s spine. “I was meant to be yours! We were meant to be one! I can't make this alone! Finish what we've begun! You were meant to be mine! I am all that you need! You carved open my heart! Can't just leave me to bleed!” He turns to her as she offers him her microphone for the next bit. The fact he’s looking into her eyes doesn’t help her subdue her feelings. At all. In fact, it just increases those butterflies and shivers and curling of the toes. “Veronica, open the—open the door, please' Veronica, open the door. Veronica, can we not fight anymore' Please, can we not fight anymore' Veronica, sure, you're scared, I've been there. I can set you free! Veronica, don't make me come in there! I'm gonna count to three! One! Two! Fuck it!” She can’t detain her feelings anymore and crashes her lips onto his again, exactly like that time they rehearsed Seventeen together and they had their first kiss. Reggie and Alex exchange glances, though this time it’s with an eyeroll. Luke pulls away when he has to sing the very last bit of the song, keeping his forehead pressed to hers. His voice is back to its vulnerable side as he stares into his girlfriend’s eyes with so much regret for ever feeling so jealous of any lifer guy she’d ever interacted with. “Please don't leave me alone You were all I could trust I can't do this alone” He steps back from her to hit the last high note whilst Alex goes off on the drums one last time. “Still I will if I must!” Y/N watches her boyfriend for a moment, a tender, proud smile on her face and admiration in her eyes. Luke’s confidence when he plays his music, or any music for that matter, is so hot and attractive to Y/N. Though she loves his more vulnerable and adorable side he mostly pulls up whenever he’s with her, that rockstar side of his really is a close second. “Are you guys really gonna make out every time you sing together or…?” Reggie asks, capturing the couple’s attention. Y/N takes Luke’s hand in hers, intertwining their fingers together whilst her other hand rests on his bicep. “You would too if your boyfriend was so hot,” she answers, and presses a kiss to his bare shoulder. Luke smiles down at her before returning a kiss on her hair. “Now, if you guys don’t have anymore rehearsing to do, I’d like to take Luke to go and rehearse another scene together…” she trails off. As she looks up at her boyfriend and his eyes meet her suggestive glance, he already knows what’s up. “No, we’re done here, I think,” he says quickly, “Right, guys? Yes, yes, we are!” He rushes his girlfriend out the garage and to the house next door to the Molina’s where he helps you ‘rehearse’ the Dead Girl Walking scene.

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