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madewithonerib · 2 months ago

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Apparently this life in reverse is much like the Narnia Chronicles where we start out in a wintry landscape, which remains cold & sullen in perpetuity due to the curse placed on the entire world.

You may prefer Winter to Summer at this point in the global state of affairs, however, don't forget that during wintertime not much can grow—so despite the respite from the heatwaves & forest fires, it is an apt symbol for death & darkness bc depression & listlessness sets in when the days are shortened. But more importantly, in the Bible, being enshrouded in darkness is shorthand for saying we have been rendered incapable of appreciating GOD or any of HIS life saving truths—which are encoded into everything we see/hear/taste/smell/feel. We know HE exists but we will naturally assume HE only wants to do us harm, hence our natural aversion to all things overtly GOD.

Today I learned this is how our hope in GOD gets sparked, the same way Moses' eyes caught sight of the burning bush under the heavy cloak of night—he is beckoned irresistibly toward this impossible light. Something which has guided him & his people through the most unrelentingly deadly landscape, where it doesn't pay to be the smallest clan in the world. Another marker demonstrating GOD's favour on HIS people is the obvious protection HE provides them; something the devil gripes about when asked to consider Job.

So unlike the rest of the world which starts out in daylight, a life full of hopes & dreams, unbelievers only move in one direction toward death & decay & total darkness & annihilation [i.e. sunset years].

Cosmically speaking, GOD's chosen ppl's lives start at its worst possible tilt—but then HE moves us progressively toward a brighter future with HIM at the helm of our lives, something HE coaxes us to in conjunction with a tight knit relational communion with HIM.

It has been said that our dysfunctional quirks like introversion & obsessions/addictions stem from the spiritual corruption of sin, where our propensity towards these traits/habits are killing us on every level; meaning we are all serving out a death sentence despite being given seeming freedom, we are enslaved to our inner bent. So in reality, we are all individually standing on a one-way conveyor belt to being stamped with our time of death, and this fact makes us realize that our existence is both pointless & tragic; where we can never truly go from being downcast toward a progressively more lasting joyful disposition.

Our existential angst either gets buried by our incessant need to find a solution to avoid this outcome, or to become less aware of the impending demise we know we are desperate to not deserve.

I think that is why Christmas is such an important holiday, the day the world was given it's ray of hope to escaping utter destruction; and why my childhood was filled with movies depicting alien invasions that pitted the entire world against a super intelligent force that is both unstoppable & incomprehensible to the human race.

But as I have already mentioned before, I've only recently begun to trust this alien superpower, known as GOD, WHO enters my life in ways I have not always fully understood whether HIS intentions were for my good or not. I admit I still from time to time pull out whatever arsenal I have with me to either hurt HIM or try to wipe HIM out entirely so I do not have to comply with whatever HE asks of me.

The problem with that is, when I do I inevitably re-enter some version of the gloom when I never had HIS light shining & leading towards this incredible promise of a hope filled future w/ endless possibilities.

It's like the most important person in the world has befriended us & suddenly we don't feel our life is a repetitive act of futility and thus a complete waste of our time. That was the key take away from the other day:

It's not the fact that anything has changed in our lives, we did nothing to achieve/earn HIS attention/care, and yet somehow we sense that something has ever so slightly shifted us out of the appalling outlook we had on life.

Some days HIS Presence seems barely noticeable, on other days markedly in the same room; but most astonishingly HE never leaves us to stew on our own for too long, despite being at our worst most days. I guess this is how it has to be, in order to break any possible mistaken link we may draw from the world & permanently degenerate toward idolizing created things—rather than growing in worshipful adoration of GOD, for HIS mercy & grace to redeem us from our darkened & hopeless existence. This base level giving glory to another, s/t GOD vowed HE would never allow HIS ppl to do in Isaiah 42:8.

Likely what David learned by the time he wrote: "Against YOU, and YOU alone, have I sinned" [Psalm 51:4]

I think most of us has heard the revulsion preachers have had over David failing to regret his vile acts against Bathsheba/Uriah & their extended family; when they clearly suffered irreparable damage under his misguided desire to "have his cake & eat it too."

Meaning possession of said item is lost the moment it is consumed—losing something we can't replace is priceless, we have forever lost it. And I think that is what was being communicated to me earlier this morning, as I was listening to a recording about how we react or treat others is essentially what we are doing to ourselves bc we all are linked together through GOD. And rn I can't truly quite see the link bc it sounds a lot like Buddhism, which has this concept of achieving Enlightenment as being likened to becoming a drop of water that is being absorbed back into this heavenly oceanic end.

But this concept feels undeniably abstract to me, like they don't really go together but out of convenience we have jammed it in the same junk drawer as all the other things that have cluttered our lives full of misfits we've come across & rendered us incapable of knowing what else to do with it.

The closest I can come to, this idea that we hurt/help ourselves when we hurt/help others, is it seemed to be alluding to something similar to where we don't pour poison into a teapot bc we could never take a sip without killing ourselves too.

This is one of the accusations made in a British murder mystery I watched a few months ago, it was very odd: In the story, one of the housemaids had written a ghost letter to the secret illegitimate heiress, who is easily fooled into thinking that she has a long lost Aunt in Australia.

The young lady was kept in the dark as to her true lineage to the kind elderly benefactor, who "adopted her" when she was a baby. But in actuality was her mother, who was heartbroken when her lover walked out on her when she revealed she was pregnant with their first child. And so to protect the family name from being tarnished, her mother was never allowed to acknowledge her child as her own & instead was stuck pretending it was all an act of altruism.

Throughout the movie her mother is in ill health, wishing for death, but is slowly being poisoned by her maid. And I guess the saddest part is, this woman went through all her life keeping her beloved daughter at arm's length, never to embrace her in public or in private bc her reputation among men was more important to her than true familial love. The haunting aspect being how closely aligned this choice is with the pretension of a compromised faith causes us to live all our lives in a total farce, having to force a smile & pretend everything we do is a selfless act of altruism.. kind of like that maid, who befriended the unwitting heiress & feigning interest in her life just so she could have something to write back as her beleaguered & doting Aunt.

Maybe that's why JESUS says HE will deny them to their face, calling them children of the devil, the father of lies. No one in this world is capable of the good required to enter GOD's Kingdom, the forgiveness & atonement offered through JESUS is no light matter: We cannot fake it till we make it.

Though I still struggle with not being a complete douche bag to those who rub me the wrong way, it is no wonder I have difficulty appreciating GOD's goodness in the presence of mine enemies [Psalm 23].. good has nothing to do with bad fruit. I mean a good tree does not produce bad fruit, so the pruning off of the diseased areas is ongoing. It's like that environmental safety video at work, made in the UK where a civil engineer was taking final measurements on the old bridge when a powerful gush of wind blew his measuring tape over the edge. But when he reflexively rushed to save it from being lost, he grabbed it at the exact moment his measuring tape made contact with a live wire which had escaped his notice. What resulted was a plume of red mushroom cloud, according to a witness on the road he saw what looked like a tiny nuclear bomb had gone off. The tragedy was back in his day, doctors would try to save as much of the body to help the victim resume a normal life, and in the video it was made explicitly clear to everyone that bc some of the necrotic tissue was left attached to the healthy parts of his body, though he appeared to be recovering from the severe burns—he eventually hit a point where the toxicity in his blood killed his vital organs, and he succumbed to his injuries. Lock, stock, & barrel guys, we cannot have anything to do with evil, and it has to all go or we will die in our sins.

That worksafe video is seared into my mind, it was so poignant. Our knowledge only grows with time, as with everything else, so don't lose hope.

Still, I don't find it natural to assume treating someone badly hurts us as well, though there is the law of reaping what you sow..but now that I'm thinking about it again, GOD said we are to do everything as unto the LORD—something that has helped in the past, but when the carrot vanishes & all that is left is the stick, this donkey is not moving an inch no matter how much YOU beat it. [Colossians 3:23]

I'm terrible at this phase where GOD is zeroing out all value from the world, where threats or even actual shame is being levied on me repeatedly. It's really brutal, great yet another person I want to avoid with everything within me.

Sometimes it is evident that hope is only a prayer away; but in the heat of the moment—it is impossible to avoid exacting revenge like Lamech when he said to his wives: "Adah and Zillah, hear my voice; you wives of Lamech, listen to what I say: I have killed a man for wounding me, a young man for striking me." [Genesis 4:23-24]

Sometimes I feel like I'm progressing in the wrong direction & I don't even want to talk to GOD. I don't know how many feel that way, bc I always think of Cain & how GOD also spoke to him & advised him against the evil he had already intended & later denied altogether.

Sebastian Scheichl | @zeppaio | Rory McMahon | via delta-breezes

On a related note, I think that is why GOD encouraged us to pray without ceasing, because the moment A&E failed to follow GOD when HE walked off in the cool of the evening they fell into sin & ceased to be perfect, which really demonstrated the basic purpose of prayer is to dialog with GOD. This is something I experience firsthand on a weekly basis.

It's really like a conversation where we hear HIM say something then we ask for clarification or ad lib based on what we think HE meant. Then HE will bring things into our lives to help us understand HIM better, it's pretty cute to be able to have this constant conversation with HIM bc HE is not someone we can actually run away from or avoid. Plus HE knows how to rock the boat, and get us thrown over board. Tonight you swim with the fish, for real.. no gangster pulls that off without actually ending us & the conversation. I like the adage that we can't receive from GOD if we are too filled with unforgiveness, anger, bitter resentment, and/or pride; so it’s no wonder HE said only the empty vessel is ready for holy use.

I know what you guys are all thinking, this is far off from being mistaken as worshipful devotion to GOD: Put a pin on it guys, this is a lifelong journey not an overnight red eye to Hawaii. We will never arrive at the point of true worship of GOD, HE tops us off every time, or maybe I should say HE fills us up every time instead. lol

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RE [10:10] Religious Fervor Which Stems From Hypocrisy

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