#Nah yall got PRANKED | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

thatdeadaquarius · 2 years

Note

Was reading thru ur answered asks again (also hey lol i CAME BACK--) and like. Oh my god. It gave me The Most Idea.

So you get isekaied to Teyvat right? They hear your og language, they revere every single worf from your mouth, yadda yadda yadda. But like. How does SLANG AND THE OTHER ASPECTS OF UR OG LANGUAGE translate. I am having VERY heavy flashbacks to Pokemons "jelly filled donuts".

So like-- for example: (this is the first one that came to my head dont judge me i am tumblr trash) (lets also assume that traveler has perfect understanding of ur language and slang and all the nuances of it)

Lets say you and the traveler were hanging out with some of the Vision holders, and the traveler had some shenanigans and pranks or something planned. After they pull their shit, you say "i hate you so much (affectionate)". Which kind of throws the Vessels in for a loop because like-- their god literally just said they HATED someone. And hate is a PRETTY STRONG WORD. So they should DEFINITELY strike them down for catching their gods ire but-- AFFECTIONATE????? how does one hate someone affectionately???????? Does this mean their god hates the traveler but decided to recind their hate last second? Is it some form of Divine and Holy emotion that cannot be described by the mere words of their language????

Meanwhile youre just there vibin and having a blast with the traveler while you casually give them a philosophical crisis AHAHAHA

Another example is shortened words-- because i know teyvat doesnt have shit like "ily" or "omg" or "lmao" or "fyi" or "brb". Because honestly, without the cultural knowledge and background of the internet, these sets of letters are just fucking GIBBERISH.

And i know that like-- i know enough internet slang abbreviations that i can literally just talk in jumbles of letters, so how in the WORLD would the vessels interpret that? Because its very clear that their god is just using the letters of their language, HELL they might even use Teyvatian letters so what in the world are they saying????

So theyd just hear a convo between the traveler and reader thats like:

Reader: traveler, i gtg asap; tldr i forgot some stuff back in the cr brb

Traveler: wait fr?

Reader: yeah fr

Traveler: lol f

Reader: (sighs) ffs man-- anyways brb for real

Traveler: cya

And the vessels are just watching the exchange like "huh?? What????? What just happened here??????" And theyre just wondering if they used teyvatian to talk in the "divine language of the gods" but nah-- yall are just dickin around AHAHA

Hey, so it came to my attention some of this was AAVE, and while i am southern so things like "ya'll" got included w/o me thinking - thats not an excuse for me to use this as a white person.

so if you wouldnt mind letting me please know if i do this as we talk abt language more and more - i do not want to repeat shit like this again.

I'm genuinely sorry to any black readers out there.

I've personally seen and cringed with you when I see imagines/reader things that assume a white person as default,

All I can do in ur eyes is promise that I am actively putting a stop to my ignorance of things like AAVE, and ask for forgiveness (which you arent obligated to give, never feel that way).

So with that in mind, read the ask below with caution, although it has since been edited.

____

ITS YOU!! >:D

A treat for ur ask my liege 🤲🍪✨️

I think u were literally the first asker after my first SAGAU/Isekai language brainrot post!! Omg u came back with a banger LMAO

What in the public menace is this...

(Gif is traveler and u pranking bitches)

Traveler knowing our world + language + SLANG?? INTERNET?? is SUCH A CONCEPT

So much room for inside jokes

I absolutely love the first one u said about phrases these days/gen z ig? slang

Its like so dramatic now that i think about it

Hate / love / dead / die / just straight up threats towards ur friends as affection or if theyre annoying u 😭

So many explicitives that make it hit harder too "go fucking die, my love <3"

^^^Or yeah like contradictions lol

♤

I think it was @nexylaza (srry abt the tag!) who replied to one of my earlier asks about blunt language how that might sound like to Teyvatians like ur emotions sound more extreme than what u actually feeling (which makes sense ur literally using hate = mildly dislike LMAO)

Same situation here like what u said ^^^

♧

(Ok i did lovely Aether awhile back so we'll go w/ Lumine this time! <3 u Aether!!)

*idk at an event/party for your arrival or something, and ya hungry fucks r hoarding the buffet table lol 🍻

You: "Shut the fuck up Lumine-"

Lumine: "Why r u pouring ur drink like ur in a earthquake lmao? Shaky hands lol"

*The immediate area of people around you go dead silent

*Lumine laughs

💀💀!!

Lumine: "Your gonna miss our cups LMAO"

You: "Bitch!" (u grinnin too lol)

*the whole rooms now quiet 😭

Lumine: "Don't spill- 🤣"

You: "I fucking hate you u whore <3"

(And u give the most genuine like abt to laugh smile🥰 )

*...a confused and kinda scared tension fills the room lol

*So poor Noelle, is like, oh. my. god. Creator is that upset with Lumine?? I must try to see what happened, how I can help! I dont remember Lumine doing anything bad to them! Shes wonderful y u do this to her 🥲

Noelle: "Uh, um, e-excuse me? Is every-everything al-alright, Y-y-your Majesty?"

You: "Huh? Yeah why??"

Noelle: "...w-well..."

UR FACE LIKE "😗?" LMFAO

*The room is staring at Lumine, in a mix of like shock, fear, and a little admiration for taking ur hate?? mood swing??? so well,,

theyre just waiting on Noelle to get an answer from you as to why you hate someone u seemed to care so much about, esp since they were ur first vessel 💀

look what you did their poor hearts u gonna give them a heart attack soon

Noelle: "A-a-a-a-are y-y-you s-sure??"

SHE IS SWEATIN

You: "🤨🤨??"

*Lumine finally notices why theyre all quiet and kinda concerned looking, bc u sure as hell wouldnt 😭 (i mean it is normal speech for u)

And Lumine's like: "No Noelle we're all good! It's just how Your Grace's home world, er, speaks for slang? Its overexagerated purposely dont worry love"

...

*Im sure they dont all believe her (or even you if u tell them 😭) and are just like,, REALLY NERVOUS CHUCKLING WHILE LIKE SWEATING-

And it takes a good like 10 minutes for the conversations to start getting back to their volume again, and they all still are looking over their shoulder checking on you guys 😰

(U did pour drinks w/o spillin tho🍻)

♡

THE TEXTING SLANNGGG

Ok, but u and Lumine would fucking write letters to people, and being the little shits pranksters u are,

(Bc u kno Teyvat dont got nothing else bc we're in the medival ages, besides having cameras- 🙄 )

And u guys r constantly-

"oh yes yes, that sounds all well and good Keqing, please inform the Qixing that I'll be there ASAP"

AND THEN-

"oh haha, silly me, i forgot that only Lumine/you get that stuff, sorryyyy 😋!!!"

SOME PUBLIC MENACES LMFAO PLEASE

And it just spreads to ALLLL the official documents u write or literally any letters sent to anybody-

And everyone else is feeling like the friend that got sacrificed to walk in the grass instead of the sidewalk 💀💀

While also being like "??¿?¿??? 🥲🥲😀😀???"

Is this ancient code?? Why does Lumine get to know it??

Why dont the like??? really old deities understand it??!!

But then nerds like Tighnari, Albedo, Alhaitham, Zhongli, Sucrose, Ayaka, Kokomi, Xingqiu, Childe, Yanfei, Shenhe, Kazhua, Sara, Ayato, Heizou, Cyno, Kaeya

Try to "solve" the letters or slang, poor things and not a single one of them gets it (y did u do this to them lmao)

(God i finally looked at a character list so i wouldnt leave anyone out, but theres so many of these fucks by now help)

^^^But all these ppl try to solve it in different ways/for different reasons that im too lazy to type out individually, u can see it right??

Some see this as an ancient scholarly code thing, some of them think of it like a rlly hard puzzle, and some just rlly want to put the mental effort into knowing/not being left out 😭😭

And if anybody happens to see some letter exchanges w/ Lumine or like any written responses, you do not. stop. using. text slang. back to back.

(Like what u put in the ask💀)

And its so miserable for those characters mentioned especially, bc they look like scrambled letters 😭

Honestly them seeing u two talk to each other via letters just proves that the letters even mean anything at all to them, bc how did u understand each other, otherwise???!!

(No one would ever realize u guys were fucking around unless u told them 💀)

✨️Sorry✨️this✨️isnt✨️that✨️great✨️i✨️just✨️wanted✨️ to✨️ expand✨️ on✨️ what ✨️u ✨️already ✨️had ✨️nothing ✨️new✨️ 🧚🏽‍♀️🧚🏽‍♀️

I felt feral and out of it when i wrote this, i literally dont remember a single word i typed on that bullet list..

SO i still have asks/requests im gonna answer but i will be posting my follower event poll!! CLICK ME :) ♡

Yall get to choose what i write about for some posts :D

(You can be a new follower!)

✨️

BTW

UR SO BIG BRAIN SMART 2ND RANDOM U EVEN THOUGHT ABT TEYVATIAN LETTERS GETTING INCLUDED ADHJSLALASLL

WHAT A GENIUS

I hope my shit writing was somewhat ok of a reply to read to pay u back for that great idea lol

Cheers,

🌒🌧🌊Aquarius♒️🌌🌘

♡the beloveds

@karmawonders

#2nd random u just wanna be a public menace i stg #gen z slang/phrases r so dramatic #genshin impact #ask box open #my asks #genshin sagau #sagau #genshin imagines #genshin sagau ideas #gender neutral reader #please send asks #genshin scenarios #genshin god reader #genshin isekai #genshin noelle #noelle x reader

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heavyhitterheaux · 2 years

Text

Who is in My House?

First Lady of Private Garden Fic

AN: you are always going to continue to play with your husband lmao

Synopsis: "He just left, so come over" prank has Jackman in SHAMBLES

Pairing: Husband!Jack Harlow x Wife!Reader

Please Do Not Repost My Content Anywhere

Deciding that you wanted to play another prank on your husband, you started a group chat with all of the members of PG to get some ideas. You had been throwing ideas back and forth for about a week and a half when everyone agreed upon which one you should do.

Everyone voted for you to do the “He just left, come over.” text prank that had been floating around Tik Tok and you already knew your husband was probably going to have a mental breakdown or be completely pissed off.

PG would be going out to lunch, while you stayed home and pretended not to feel well. You knew that Jack would be hesitant to leave you, but you would have to reassure him that you were okay to make this work.

Clay told you that he would text you when they all got to the restaurant so that you would then send the text to Jack.

Everything was a go and you couldn’t wait.

“Baby, are you sure you don’t want me to stay? I don’t like leaving you by yourself if you aren’t feeling that well.” Jack said while pushing your hair up out of your face that had fallen.

“I promise, I’ll be fine. Just bring me back something. I’ll just probably drink some tea and go to sleep.”

“You’re absolutely positive?”

“Yes, boo bear. I’m okay.”

“I love you and you better say it back this time.” Jack said while eyeing you.

“I love you too, more than anything else in this world.” You answered before laughing as he leaned down to kiss you.

“We shouldn’t be gone long.”

“Take your time, I want you to have fun. If I need you, I’ll text you.”

There was also one other person who was in on the prank and Jack was about to lose his shit when he found out.

No one other than Dua herself.

She was currently on her U.S. tour and she had a show tomorrow night in Atlanta. You quickly sent a text of the details of the prank last night and of course she was in.

About 45 minutes had passed when you received a text from your brother-in-law

Clay- He’s here. Everything is a go.

You- Lmaooooo it’s showtime

You ‘accidentally’ sent Jack a text thinking that someone was coming over to the house and you knew it would send him into a panic.

However, someone really was coming, but he didn’t know that.

You wanted for the prank to be a little different and that Dua would eventually show up.

You- He’s out with the rest of PG, you can come over! I could use the company.

Jack noticed that the notification sound went off alerting him that he had a text from you. He was hoping that you were okay and didn’t need him, but he got a lot more than he bargained for.

Knowing what was happening, Jack’s eyes went wide as PG was trying not to laugh and looking at the menu to distract themselves.

“Uhh, Jack? You okay?”

“Mm hmm.” Jack quickly answered, trying not to make a scene or make a big deal out of it.

“You sure? I mean you’re usually pale as shit, but it seems as if you got ten times paler when you looked down at your phone and read whatever wifey sent you.”

“I…” Jack started to say, but quickly stopped himself.

“What?”

“She was all like ‘I don’t feel good’ earlier and now I see a text saying that I’m out with yall and to come over? If someone is in my fucking house, I’m about to murder them and then I’ll deal with her. I guess she meant to send that to whoever and not me.”

“I’m sure it’s nothing, it might just be Saweetie. I know she said she would be staying in Atlanta for a few days.”

“Nah, the way she worded it made it seem like it was someone else.”

“You worry too much. Y/N doesn’t have eyes for anyone but you. We’ve been wanting to come here for a while so your ass better not get up from this table. You see the way she acted with that Anitta girl and she sees how you acted with Giveon so do you honestly think she would do anything to break your trust?”

“Clay, facetime her right now. She might not answer if it’s from me.”

Clay simply shrugged and did what he was told.

It rang for a few seconds before your bright face came on the screen.

“Is that my favorite Harlow child? Hi, my baby!”

“Hey, Y/N, Jack just asked me to call you to check on you. He told us you weren’t feeling that well.”

“Well aren’t you sweet? That’s why I keep you around.”

“You know we should have gotten married instead.”

Jack rightfully smacked the back of his little brother’s head and all you could do was laugh.

“Ow!”

Clay purposely angled his phone so Jack could see you and took note of another person in the background and Jack’s eyes went wide.

It was so quick, that Jack didn’t really get a good look as to who it was.

“In another life, my love. I’m fine! I actually feel a little better since drinking the tea.”

Jack immediately snatched Clay’s phone from him and questioned you not wanting to put it off any longer.

“Baby girl.”

“Yes, pookie?”

“First of all in another life, my ass. I have no hesitations to throw your favorite Harlow child off the nearest cliff. And who the… you got someone in my house I don’t know about?”

“What? What are you talking about?” You curiously asked to play along and not try to laugh.

“Mamas, do not fucking play with me. I got that text message you obviously meant to send to someone else.”

“What text? Baby, I’m confused. Are you feeling okay?”

“I will jump through this phone right fucking now. Who the fuck is in my house?”

“Uh? Besides me? Your children. I just finished walking the golden girls. I think Blanche misses you because she curled up next to your pillow.”

“Y/N!!!!!”

“Jackman.”

“Do not get smart with me. I am going to ask you one more time.”

“No one, baby! I’m here by mys…..”

Without warning the facetime call cut off and if Jack was mad before, he was pissed off now.

“That’s it, I’m kicking both of their asses.” Jack said getting up and grabbing his keys. Clay put one hand on his shoulder to get him to sit back down.

“I didn’t even see anyone else on the call. You feeling okay?”

“How could you not?! They were sitting to the left of her.”

“Jack, is yall house haunted? If it is, I can’t stay there no more. Black people don’t do ghosts. I mean truth be told I know Y/N doesn’t either and if I know anything about ghosts and her, she’ll probably run them off.” Shloob said while taking a sip of his iced tea.

“No, it’s not haunted! There was literally another person there with her!”

“Well, try calling her back.”

Jack then whipped out his phone and proceeded to do so all for it to go to voicemail.

“She cannot be fucking serious right now. I’m getting my shit to go.”

Jack hopped in his jeep and was speeding down the highway to get back to your shared home.

He didn’t even bother parking in the garage and left the car out front before making a beeline to the front door.

Once opened, he walked around to the living room to find you sitting on the floor playing with your two piglets.

You looked up to see Jack and the pissed off look on his face.

“Uh, baby? Why are you back so soon? And where is my food? Look babies, daddy’s home!” You said while looking down at the both of them. They saw Jack and immediately got excited.

Jack was steadily looking around and checking behind the couches as well as in the closets.

“Baby?”

Jack didn’t even bother to answer you as he was continuing on with his search.

“Jackman!”

“Who the fuck you got in here, huh? I’m about to kick their ass right now.”

“Are we still on this? No one, baby. Except me and our tribe of children.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“Hmm well okay. Have fun searching.” You replied as you went back to playing with two of your children.

Jack tore up the house from top to bottom looking for someone that he thought had been in the house.

Once he gave up his search, he went downstairs to see you and Dua on the couch talking and laughing.

“Y/N!!! WHY IS SHE IN MY HOUSE?!”

“Correction, our house, baby.”

“Hi to you too, Jack!”

All Jack did was stare at her and give her the evil eye.

“See, I knew you had someone else in here.”

“Babe, Dua just got here five minutes ago.”

“Y/N….. I know what I saw on that facetime call!”

“I told you he was crazy. You should move in with me, now he’s seeing shit. Next thing you know you’ll have to put him in a nursing home.”

“Dua, shut your ass up and move away from my wife! Six feet at all times!”

“Jack!”

“Y/N!”

“Okay since we’re all saying names, I’ll do my own. Dua!”

“Baby girl…..”

“Yes, pookie?”

“Is that... Is that a camera?”

“Oops.”

“DID YOU…. THIS WAS A PRANK! SHE WAS HERE THE WHOLE TIME?!?!”

“UHHH……”

You took off running while Dua was laughing and with Jack following quickly behind you and catching you.

“Now, I know you didn’t think you were going to get far with those short legs of yours did you?”

“Well, it was worth a try.”

“Jack! Since I’m here, let me get a copy of that video!”

“HELL NO!”

“I mean it was better than me asking for your wife to sit on my face.”

“See, now I’m really about to have to beat your ass. You always come over here and act outta pocket.”

“Beat my ass? I’d rather eat hers.”

“DUAAAAA!!!!! AND Y/N STOP LAUGHING!!!”

Liked by jackharlow, claybornharlow, saweetie, dualipa, 2forwoyne, lilnasx, druski2funny, and 3,184,907 others

y/ninsta: my husband mad at me yall lmaooooo

jackharlow: y/ninsta I’m legally separating from you tomorrow 😐

lilnasx: what happened this time? lmaooo

claybornharlow: lilnasx another prank by wifey 😂

druski2funny: y/ninsta why you stay stressing my man out?!

2forwoyne: seeing him freak out about that text message was TOP TIER

jackharlow: HOLD THE FUCK UP

jackharlow: PG?!? YALL WERE IN ON IT?!

urbanwyatt: jackharlow we may or may not have an entire group chat that the primary reason is to prank you

shloob_: I told her not to do it

quiiso: shloob_ you stay throwing our asses under the bus. you were it on it too

jackharlow: urbanwyatt and to think I call you my best friend

saweetie: y/ninsta give that man a break! that hairline keeps going south because of the stress!

jackharlow: DIAMONTE!!!

saweetie: yes Jack?

jackharlow: saweetie after I get done kicking their asses, you’re next

y/ninsta: much thanks to dualipa lmaooo had my baby looking everywhere for you 😭😭

dualipa: y/ninsta glad to be of service!

jackharlow: dualipa where were you even hiding?!

y/ninsta: jackharlow you never looked in the backyard!

dualipa: jackharlow lemme at the wife and I promise not to do it again

jackharlow: dualipa one of these days, you about to learn to stop playing with me

dualipa: jackharlow so is that a yes?

jackharlow: dualipa it’s a ‘I still have my bb gun and I’ll shoot you’

dualipa: jackharlow you wouldn’t shoot your wife’s friend!

jackharlow: dualipa now, who told you that lie? you can get all this smoke any day of the fucking week and saweetie is next

saweetie: jackharlow now why am I in it?!

y/ninsta: saweetie that hairline comment lmaooooo

jackharlow: y/ninsta you laughing a little too loud over there for my liking. on your knees.

sza: oh my

y/ninsta: jackharlow DO YOUR WORST

claybornharlow: now I understand urbanwyatt’s pain

jackharlow: y/ninsta but don’t think this makes up for the shit you pulled today. consider this war and watch your back

y/ninsta: jackharlow may the best Harlow win (that’s me) but imma need you to make me cum first

jackharlow: y/ninsta who said that I was about to let you cum?

y/ninsta: jackharlow wait, what? 🤨

jackharlow: and dualipa if you so much as utter a WORD I’ll end you 😡

dualipa: jackharlow 👀

dualipa: y/ninsta I’ll make you cum kbye

jackharlow: DUAAAAAA!!!!

Taglist:

@harlowsbby

@babyharleezy

@hoodharlow

@stefansalvatoresgf

@jackiehollanderr

@primadxna-girl

@dessmxsworld

@cockslutslurper3000

@raelorns21

@variety-fangirl

@gbaabyyyy

@kamorsstuff

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@thinkingaboutjharlow

@fluidsentiment

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@yana4life

@beanbagbitch

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@carma-fanficaddict

@minaxcarter

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@xjup1t3r

@venusvinc

@jacksmoviestar

@jackharloww

@midnight-star47

@minkookie95

@inluvwithladybug

@tynesharandolph8633-blog

@exoticr0ses

@jharlowsangels

@jackierose902109

@jackmansbabymama

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@louisianalady

@fdl305

@automaticpeachsong

@harlowcomehome

#jack harlow #jack harlow x black reader #jack harlow x reader #jack harlow fluff #jack harlow concepts #jack harlow fic #jack harlow fanfic

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some-lonely-loser · 3 months

Text

STAY HIGH .02

📍Location- Martinez Household

📷POV- Narrator (1st)

After the party, I didn’t really remember much of anything. I’m not shocked though, I got so drunk that Ashtray guy offered to walk me home. Surprisingly enough, I made it home by myself and into my bed before my parents noticed how late I arrived. What I did remember was that weird girl. What was her name? Jennifer? Julie? Oh, It was Jules. Yeah no doubt, she was weird. I mean, she cut herself in front of everyone AND scared Nate Jacobs. I never seen anyone do that, but I guess that’s what new people are for.

Sienna sure thought it was weird too. But hey, maybe she’ll be cool. I ended up laying in bed for about 9 more minutes, scrolling on whatever apps peaked my interest before I got up and started getting ready for school

I had just gotten out of the shower before of course, Sienna called me. I waited for the call to connect and before I could speak Sienna screamed and my hearing almost blew.

“GUESS WHO THE FUCK JUST TEXTED ME AND ASKED ABOUT YOU”

My mind had raced through a million names before I stopped and realized, she could be joking. She usually pranks me like this but I decided to feed into her little scheme.

“Who?”

I mumbled with the most monotone voice I could utter out of me.

“Ashtrayyyy”

I stopped my movements and stared at the camera only to find she was already staring at it, smirking at me.

“You’re such a liar Sienna, and not a good one either”

She rolled her eyes before quickly responding.

“I’m not lying, i’ll send you a screenshot.”

Not long after she said that, I felt my phone vibrate and saw her display name reveal itself at the top of my phone. I clicked on the photo she sent me.

“Told you I wasn’t lying. Did he text you?” I snapped out of my

“No, he didn't text me. What did he want my number for?” I questioned

I knew Sienna wouldn’t know why he wanted my number but I just had to ask. Plus, I was really just thinking to myself out loud. And just as I guessed, she says she doesn’t know

“Maybe he has like.. A secret admirer crush on you?”

That was a ridiculous statement. I mean, Ashtray? Out of the whole school, that he doesn’t attend, he has a crush on me? Yeah, no chance.

“Girl..” I mumbled, rolling my eyes. “I’ll see you at school, I have to finish getting ready, Do I still gotta pick you up?” I questioned, Sienna often needs a ride to school, whether it be she just doesn’t want to drive or her car is broken.

“Nah, I think I’m gonna walk. Get some fresh air before having to deal with this school and it’s bullshit.” She chuckled.

We said our goodbyes before I hung up the phone and started getting dressed, and soon after I was in the car driving to school.

I was busy putting my books inside of my locker before I heard a voice that sounded like Sienna.

“So, I texted Ashtray” She spoke with excitement. I turned around and almost slapped her

“You WHAT?!” I yelled, gaining attention of most of the people near me, who gave me a little bit of a dirty look, but that didn’t matter

Sienna burst out laughing, hunching over and holding her stomach. “You should’ve.. seen your face!” She breathed out, looking at me with a couple of tears rolling down her face.

I crossed my arms and looked at her with a blank face, but after a few seconds of her looking at me with a smile, it wasn’t long before I started laughing too.

Our laughing quickly faded away as I heard the voice of Nate Jacobs, and saw him coming near us, staring at me with a creepy smirk on his face

WC: 664

Yall… hear me out😰 Ik I haven’t posted on here in some time but😔 It’s been 8 months since PT 1 so i’ll do better🙏🏽 Ik it’s mad short but 😭

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chiquititaosita · 1 year

Note

Hii I read your sanji at the powwow and I thought it was so cute!! Can you write one for zoro? Zoro with his native gender neutral s/o at the powwow and introducing him to their family 🥺 I love you MWAH

BEAR NOTE: hi my love!!! I LOVE YOU TOO! MWAH BESITOS FOR YOU! YES YES YES YES OMG I HAVE A DRAFT ALREADY SO IMMA PUT IT RIGHT HERE I JUST DIDNT KNOW WHEN TO POST IT !! I HOPE YALL LOVE THIS ENJOY

Zoro with a indigenous s/o (powwow edition)

reader: gender neutral reader (indigenous)

post type: headcanon

tags: @sanjisblackasswife @roronoaswifey @noawithlove @zoros-sheath @euphofic @luffyinlove @3strapstyle @zorobignaturals @blackfangedreaper @usopps-devotee @some-piece @downforsanji @owlight

-“you see son, you got to follow the direction of where the wind blows, and that’s how you’ll find your tribe.”

-“ okay, but where is the wind? I don’t see shit.” 💀😭

-“ you must listen to the sounds of nature guide you to your tribe.”

-“I can’t hear shit bro.”

-if y’all are at a powwow he immediately looks for booze. He’ll find a way

-terrified of Rez dogs but it’s internal.

-“okay you’re luffy and you’re curly.”

-mans made the mistake of naming two Rez dogs 💀

-he literally tried to pet one, and it bit his finger a little bit

-“WHAT I DIDNT KNOW IT MISTAKEN ME FOR A TOY!”

- when he screams it sounds like a grito then a native war cry. Or that he’s singing some powwow songs. And it actually was a powwow song that your family literally started to play on the drums.

-will tap his feet to the drum circles

. -“OI, YOU LITTLE FUCKING MONGRELS GET BACK HERE!!” Will chase the kids

- immediately gets lost after five minutes.

-“Why do you look like a booger?”

- when I tell you that one of the Rez kids tells zoro that instead of being called a moss head. He gets immediately offended

-“I AM NOT A BOOGER!”

- sees a “coyote.” and mistakens it for luffy.

-“Oi Luffy! Come here can you show them that you’re not…whatever it’s called.”

-When he sees one outside he screeches so loud. He doesn’t even grab his swords. (Ifkykyk)

- “Y/n!!!! Where is the sake?”

-“we don’t have sake here?”

-“WHAT?!”

-Aunties are going to be questioning him, and fawning over him.

-“ Auntie please leave my boyfriend alone..”

-one of your aunties will not hestitate to back hand you.

-drinking matches with uncles always. (Zoro tends to win a lot)

-“HEY GET BACK HERE THOSE ARENT TOYS THEY ARE SACRED TOOLS OF BLADES!”

-says he hates fry bread but secretly loves it

-whenever your family cooks, zoro gets hesitant at first, but once you guide him he loves it. Seriously he’s obsessed

-“so why are you cleansing again?”

-“to get rid of the bad medicine sunny boy.”

- finds wood chopping relaxing when on the Rez.

-when your parents meet zoro they were actually thinking it was a prank.

-“this is your boyfriend?”

-“yes.”

-“you sure… we expected him to be..not green.”

-The way native moms try to be around the bush. but your parents grow to love him, because he literally defended his parents and saved them.

-“Heh. Don’t mention it. It’s just what I do.”

-When everyone sits down for dinner, everyone asks zoro to tell stories out on sea, and especially about the scars.

-“I thought you looked like the lady that my auntie when she got beat up by tha!”

-“that what?”

-“nothing.”

-nah when he’s drunk with your uncles. Nah bro. Zoro.exe has stopped working please reboot

-“i maybe slow but at least I don’t understand directions.”

- zoro is not having it with Rez dogs he’ll just bark back and be an unhinged moss head

- “GRAWRRARR BARK BARK WOOF WOOF BITCH!!”

- your parents accept him so 8/10

#one piece imagines #bears asks ✍︎︎#zoro x reader #indigenous reader #native y/n #zoro x native y/n #zoro x y/n #one piece #roanoa zoro

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firstkokon0is · 3 years

Text

tokrev characters when you did the “i told you to look good today” prank to them

lol this trend is quite old but its been on my mind lately but yall can request sum goods to me😁👍

tw: heavy swear words and grammar errors

characters: draken, mikey, mitsuya, baji, chifuyu, hakkai, takemichi.

gn reader

DRAKEN

the moment those words came out of your mouth he just stared at you

while you’re smiling idiot

he will literally just stare at you

“yea same to you” showing a annoying smile

he get the situation, HE KNOWS HE LOOK GOOD SO THIS AINT GNNA WORK

you guys just laugh it off, you didn’t even told him that it was just a prank because he already knew it but will still ask you in the middle of your date

“hey is my style in clothes really aint that good? were you serious? i mean its not that bad…..” he said while looking himself up through his phone camera

“nope, i thought you get the joke but oh well……ken, you look so good everytime yk even if u wear nothing u still can pull it off” you told him and smack his bald head playfully

“yea yeaa i would’ve gone feral if u went and bash my hair instead of my clothes so thats a relief” he respond with a smile

“ken why this hair-”

“aight im leaving”

“no hakahajwlwbsha”

took the joke very well

MIKEY

he spent hours looking for good clothes for this date, there’s clothes everywhere in his room and still “damn…..there’s nothing to wear”

AND WHEN U TOLD HIM THOSE WORDS???

he just pout, told you that he’s sorry, and he spent hours looking for something to wear to match your style and many more reasons

pls apologize to him

but when you told him that its a prank he just pout and said “not a good joke y/n i know you were lying because i really look good, i knew its was a prank”

just agree with him lol

will think of pranks that he could do to you for revenge, literally stressing about it while on the date with you

he wants to say the same thing to you but he can’t because you look beautiful today, just for him, and will smile just looking at you

while walking to the park he will even ask himself “does my style really match them?” “should i be the one to adjust and put my taste on clothes higher?” “i should ask mitsuya about fashion things” his mind is just filled with questions

“mikeyyyyyyy, you look good today i was just doing a silly prank im sorry if that made you feel bad, not gonna lie you’re drippy as fuck”

“i know i know im gonna prank you next time real hard” he said “if i catch you we’re gnna switch wardrobes” he said as he started to chase you around the park

in the end he came over to your place and explore your wardrobe and tried your clothes, he even stole some of your hoodies and shirts.

MITSUYA

overthinks

this mf thinks he looks good no matter what

duh he’s a designer

“well y/n i think you’re right, and i should style you sometimes dont you think?”

your hand went to your mouth so fast

he laughed at your reaction and hug you

“just kidding you look good, we look good i know that trend damn thats old” he said

you smack him playfully for that, his reaction is normal but because of that he wants to be more stylish

he can take a joke yk

after a lot of overthinking he suggests to shopping with you

even though he have some knowledge about designing and how to look good he thinks your taste in clothes is so good

will think that he’s right for you and you’re right for him

he’s your 4lyferss😩

BAJI

he will give you that “excuse me” face with a hand oh his chest because he’s offended as fuck.

“babe stop fooling people, and yourself we both know i look good”

“you dare to bash my drip hell no baby”

will brag his clothes for like 15 minutes just to prove what you’re saying is wrong

“this shirt i brought this online with a nice fabric its not cheap mf”

“my pants, you see this huh? see those sutffs on tiktoks where they style their own pants i did this shit its so cool”

“now now, baby see this shoes? oh dont even get me started but hey you look nice today hehe can i take you on our date now?”

he went from being defensive and screaming proving his shit right to his signature smile

by just that he already made your day, you really cant out keisuke baji

because he is baji, he will look good for you, and you look good for him, he will joke you around, tease you a lot, you will also do the same to him.

100% can take a fucking joke. and it will be like a competition to him.

CHIFUYU

confused baby

im sure you feel a lot of guilt rn

because baby panicked

will suggest to go back to his house and change his clothes if you want

pls apologize 😭

almost cried because he thinks he’s a bad boyfriend again lol

will spat a lot if reason like, he’s in hurry, he’s been overthinking this date since last night.

but boy he look good actually he has drip

“nononono baby, you look good i just saw the thing on tiktok so i thought it will be funny but damn im sorry i-” you didn’t even finish when he laughed

“ohhhhhh yeaaaa that trend fuck, how could i forget, nice one you got me there god dammit ill take revenge sometimes” he said laughing slightly

well he’s always on tiktok, have some few vid too, actually some went viral bc of takemichi being dumb

just like mitsuya too, will suggest to just go shopping with him and tell him what kind of clothes that you’re interested in

would love to buy your clothes for you but he’s just a broke middle schooler but he promised you that both of you will shopping someday

he took that prank seriously but when he knew that it was a joke its fine

life goes on for him

HAKKAI

oh my god please y/n why

you always complement his style because its true he has some style

after you told him that he will just scratch the back of his neck and said

“my other clothes are still wet haha…..i mean i dont look bad i mean……”

apologize, drop on your knees and do it.

nah jk

u gave in a small laugh and said sorry to him

he know about this trend actually but he never actually expect you to have the guts to do that to him

he knew about his shy personality and he knew that you know about this

he’s not offended just taken by surprise that you actually did that to him

“well anyways i dont care about me you look good today y/n”

you immediately regret saying those stuffs to him bc he’s sweet hot and respectful

but its a joke anyways he enjoyed the silly joke

he knew he look good lmao

yuzuha will be hearing this

she will prolly scold you for doing that

are you gnna repeat the silly prank again?

TAKEMICHI

💀💀💀💀💀

he will run

run back to his home attack his wardrobe and find a good clothes

ofc you feel bad so you followed him

you saw him looking for a new clothes to wear

you told him its a prank but he still didn’t want to go out looking like that

so you just decided to style him yourself

he thinks you’re right

he looks bad, his style is not it

but overall happy for pranking him and making him realize that he need to be as your same style

“takemichi, look i dont care…..whoever told you that you look bad i will kick their face, to me what ever you wear your fun personality and the reason that i fell inlove with you wont disappear” you put a hand on the top of his head and he just

cried.

“im sowwyyy- i- i cant look good- fuck ughhghuh- please dont leave me i-” he’s crying mess on your chest

“STOP CRYING DAMMIT YOU ALWAYS LOOK GOOD,”

you will never prank him again

no pls dont do it again

#tokyo revengers #draken #mikey #mitsuya #hakkai #chifuyu headcanons #takemichi #baji #tokyo revengers x reader #lol imma edit this when i feel like it #this trend is rotten but i cant stop thinking about it #baji’s reaction is funnier in my mind akowhdkan

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suguruverse · 3 years

Note

hii !! i saw this tiktok and i wanna know how the haiq characters would react 😭😭

you can choose which characs <3

— HAIKYUU BOYS REACTING TO YOU NOT WANTING TO WEAR RELATIONSHIP BRACELETS

includes - bokuto koutarou, suna rintarou and oikawa tooru

a/n - i don’t know why but writing this made me really giggly lamsk sorry okay pls enjoy :) <3

ੈ✩‧₊˚ BOKUTO KOUTARO

- dang ur really mean for this one

- bc he definitely bought it for an anniversary and he never takes off under any circumstance

- you normally don't take it off but for the sake of this prank, you stopped wearing it for a couple of days

- yall were on a cute little date and bokuto being the adorable boyfriend he is, he was holding your hand the whole time

- since you guys were eating at a restaurant, you guys sat across from each other but he still held your hand 😩

- he really likes to fidget with your hands and fingers so it didn't really take long for him to realise that you weren't wearing your matching bracelets

- but your food came before he could ask you about it

- so when you were on the way home, he squeezed your hand a little bit AND YOU COULD TELL HE WAS NERVOUS BECAUSE THAT MANS HANDS GET CLAMMY SO QUICKLY

- but you could tell so easily that he was really upset about it, i mean you can feel him sulking without even looking at him

"hey baby can i ask you a question"

"of course kou, what's up?"

"it's just that you're not wearing the bracelet i got you at our anniversary"

"oh yeah i took it off, why?"

"OH I WAS JUST WONDERING its not a big deal or anything i just thought that you really liked it and i thought that you looked really cute with it and i thou-"

"my love, you're mumbling again"

"sorry sorry but can you please put it back on when we get home?"

"eh i don't know, i don't really feel like it"

"BABYYYYYYY WHAT DO YOU MEAN"

"kou baby i was just joking, i'll put it on when we get home okay?"

"promise?"

"promise"

ੈ✩‧₊˚ SUNA RINTAROU

- this man loves all type of accessories that you give him but at the same time he has the biggest idgaf attitude

- he noticed you were wearing a new bracelet but he didn't really mention anything knowing that eventually you would come up to him excitedly telling him about it

- so you were at his house just chilling when you finally told him about the two matching bracelets that linked together

- as your boyfriend, he was obviously hoping that you would give the other bracelet to him but when you never did he was it like what??

- and you just kept going on and on about it and the moment you mentioned that you were gonna give it to his little sister, he sat up from the bed so quickly that low iron hit him like

"rin? are you okay, what's wrong?"

"why're you giving the bracelet to my sister?"

"because it's cute!! and i'll think she'll like it, she told me that she likes jewelry like this"

"oh okay"

"why? did you want it rin?"

"nah i don't really care"

"oh okay, i'll just give it to her now"

- all of a sudden he a runner he a track star 🏃🏻‍♂️🏃🏻‍♂️

"no"

"stop blocking the way rin"

"no, give the bracelet to me"

"i thought you didn't want it"

"i never said that"

"yes you di-"

"just give it to me"

- next time check your attitude bitch or i'll really leave you for your sister

ੈ✩‧₊˚ OIKAWA TOORU

- you were actually with him when you bought this and you asked for his opinion about it and everything

- but your sneaky ass was like "huh?? baby this isn't for you"

- HUHHHH???

- hurt? betrayed? heartbroken? distraught? there were no words to describe how he was feeling

- he immediately asked who it was for and you looked him dead in the eye and was like "hajime"

- HUHHHH PART TWO????

- this man was this 🤏🏻 close to leaving you at the store

- he would definitely yell everything he's saying to make a scene and make you feel bad

"IT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE CHEATING ON ME ISN'T IT??"

"tooru shut up, he's my best friend and we grew up together, so i wanted to get him something"

oikawa's brain like: tHat'S suSpiciOuS, thAt'S weiRD

"okay well what about me?"

"what about you?"

"BABYY I'M YOUR BOYFRIEND, WHY ARE YOU GETTING MATCHING BRACELETS WITH MY BEST FRIEND INSTEADDDD"

"almost everything i own is a matching pair with you tooru, what do you mean?"

"please just love me"

"you get 5 minutes"

- yeah anyways oikawa is an ugly crier so you better stop the prank before his nose starts running and rubs his snot on you

- and when you finally give him the bracelet, he is flaunting that shit around and is particularlly smug whenever iwaizumi is around

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greyeyedmonster-18 · 2 years

Text

(heres a story: way back when i worked in a space with many coworkers/staff, that i managed mind you, on april fools they thought it would be HILARIOUS to all call out. Like all of them.

and ive said before im like...always the last person to get on the bus? Metaphorically? so i was just doing my thing and working, business as usual, as NO ONE but me proceeded to show up. And i was just like "oh what a day, i hope so and so feels better" and just...handled it. And made it work, with Just Me, nbd. and when i finally did realize, i was like "oh this is very illegal" and sent the entire program home, called the CPO like "oh uhm hey" and then i got a day off.

and my staff were like "...it was a...it was a prank" (like they were at a starbucks down the street waiting for me to be like "nah, get your ass in here." and in retrospect some of the excuses were RIDICULOUS. But)

news to me!! and jokes on all of you, i got a paid day off and all yall very much didnt.

so like, first dont play pranks on me because they are often WASTED.

second, i dont celebrate april fools for this reason (and ya know, years and years of not catching onto goofs)

this blog is prank free forever and always. but happy birthday fred and george)

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ennoshawty · 3 years

Text

HQ CAPTAINS AS THINGS

i was bored and felt like doing a crackfic thing but i didn’t have any solid themes or good ideas

SO I PRESENT TO YOU - THE CAPTAINS. AS THINGS. IDK HOW TO WORD THIS BUT YOU’LL SEE AS WE GO ALONG.

warnings: VERY LONG, slandering a crybaby oikawa (lovingly), mentions f!reader, shitposting, mentions of violence in kita's, (a bit) yandere!kita, cursing, unedited, me being an idiot

officer!daichi

we are: vigilante/troublemaker

loving the enemies-to-lovers trope so much

nah bro you ain’t full criminal (bc my preppy ass could never) you just do the small vandalism things y’know like drawing peepees on government buildings and knocking over bins

u literally confessed to him by spraypainting the entire billboard by his workplace “I LIKE YOU” like way to go girl

He didn’t appreciate the creative graffiti but he rlly likes u so all u had to do was clean it and then next thing u know yall are out on a cute cafe date

but let’s talk about before yall got together

he’d CHASE u thru alleyways when he’d catch you writing “police sux” on the fuckin wall

bro is NOT AT ALL afraid to jump onto the roofs it’s FRIGHTENING to see this huge ass police officer storm after u

HES SO FAST HOT DAMN WOMAN HOW DO U GET AWAY FROM HIM??? USAIN BOLT WHOMST???

you’d almost always get away by a hair - he’s SO SO close

and it frustrates him but excites u oooooo arrest me shawty

and this would continue for a while

but yall have such fun fun banter - you’d tease him and he’d say something back and you’d bolt and he’d chase

some days he’d catch you. but in those times u slip away somehow

he’s having so much fun and doesn’t even know it

and then at one point he doesn’t even care about bringing u to justice anymore. he knows it’s bad for business and it’s unprofessional but he’s so attracted to u

he doesn’t even know it. HES IN DENIAL!!! his mind: “oh i’m just asking about her so that i know her motives” bruh no u just asked about our fav pastry this aint about crime anymore

and when he finally gets it,,,DINGDINGDINGDING SOUND THE ALARMS !!! MAN IS WHIPPED!! he’s more shy around u awww,,,doesn’t even want to chase u anymore but he will still engage in banter w u.

yall get a little peace treaty in the lil crush stage - you both are kinda aware of ur feelings towards each other but don't really wanna mess it up and jeopardize whatever's going on like bros PLEASE JUST KISS ITS INFURIATING

it’s more of a competition to see who will break the other first (and you lost he’s too hot)

he lets u joyride his cop car in an empty parking lot <3 he is the one <3 this is true love

u gotta marry him right now bro no excuses

u are no longer on the crime side of the law,,,u support him and only him fuck the rest of the cops (i’m jk of course...or am i)

u are his badass sidekick <3 unofficially of course until he marries u

u help him with the small things like helping lost children find their parents and helping old ladies cross the street

but you want to do the FUN stuff - chasing thieves and arresting drunkards.

unfortunately, he loves u too much to put u in danger so he keeps u from doing the dangerous things

after some protesting later, he trusts u to take care of urself. and now yall have a competition just like old times - whoever catches the most baddies at the end of the month wins (he WILL scold u if ur too reckless though)

THE TWO OF U ARE JUST GOOD COP BAD COP UHAHAHAHAHAHA

but it’s much more complicated than that - it’s either ur the laidback one and he’s the strict one or ur the fiery one and he’s the person like “calm down”

PLEASE HE HATES BRINGING U TO INTERROGATIONS he’s trying to be serious but you keep making him laugh istg he has to kick u out each time

u still make him laugh when u pout-glare at him thru the glass

bro says he’s not the stereotypical cop but the moment u surprise him with donuts and coffee in the morning he will make out w u right then and there

even though yall dating he still won’t let u play with his equipment

but sometimes u grab his walkie talkie when he’s not looking and prank call the others

and his coworkers know by now they’re like “oh it’s daichis gf” and go along with it HAHAHAHA “this is alpha 1, daichi just contracted ligma, over.” “roger, but what’s ligma? over.” “*inhale* LIGMA-” *daichi takes the walkie talkie back*

his coworkers are chill lmaoooo they love u two as a couple THEY ARE VERY SUPPORTIVE they planned a surprise anniversary party of when u joined the force (unofficially)

the juniors tanaka and noya are jelly ooooo but they respect their captain <3

u loooooove hanging out w the starry-eyed new recruit hinata and he’s bouncing around asking u personal questions “how did you date the commander!!! what’s he like as a bf??” he also accidentally exposes how much daichi talks about u in the office before he drags him away and murders him off camera

he does get u a walkie talkie that’s just connected to his line, tho. for emergencies. it’s ur second phone basically that only has his number in it

daichi LOVES it when u massage him after he’s had a long day but his shoulders are stiff as a statue,,,he’s also super stronk and can carry u anywhere <333

IMAGINE HE HAS A POLICE DOG - he doesn’t, but he’ll get one of his buddies to bring u a k9 unit so u can pet it and when he sees how happy u are he considers getting one PLSSS IT WOULD FIT HIM HELPPP

bro is VERY strict on safety. bulletproof glass in yalls house. alarms + cameras everywhere. trackers on every device. underground bunker. (just kidding lol)

daichi teaches u self-defense and gets u a bejeweled taser for ur bday <333 MARRY THIS MAN RIGHT NOW OR I’LL-

in other words i love daichi and he is husband material WIFE ME UP BUDDY

househusband!oikawa

we are: girlboss sugar mommy

somehow you tamed this bish to becoming your obedient malewife

and by obedient i mean whiny but compliant

IS MORE ATTACHED TO YOUR BLACK CARD THAN TO YOU. I SAID IT. THE TRUTH.

sure, he’s pretty and gives affection sometimes but the only time he’s bein cute and snuggly w u is when a new fendi purse came out and he wants it

his specialty is cooking but he’s so lazy he’s all “just get the maid to do it”

please give ur workers a raise he’s so demanding

when you take him to ur business parties hes ALWAYS bragging about you and ur large house with this and that and his favorite: indoor hot tub. he always brings up the indoor hot tub.

only reason you bring him is cuz he’s pretty and he whines when you leave him alone for too long

yall cant even stay for too long - he’ll practically drag u out of the building and whining that it’s too hot and his suit is too stuffy and to call a limo

he’s not afraid to embarrass u if u dont give him what he wants and he will spit out food at a formal dinner if its not to his liking

probably in competition w househusbands! makki and mattsun about who gets the best house so he’s constantly begging u for an extension to the house “please babe!!! makki has-” “no.”

8/10 times throws tantrums in public and 1465/10 times throws tantrums in the house

he wants to cry for the sake of crying. one time he lost his shirt and he wouldn’t stop bawling for 15 min

please find him a hobby

crybaby . the moment u give him the glare of death it’s over. but he’s got a cute crying face which makes up for his annoying whimpering

like he made the mistake of throwing a temper tantrum in the mall only for you to glare at him with a look that said “we’re discussing this when we get home and you’re gonna get your ass beat” and walk away. immediately stopped what he was doing and he was running after u, sniffling and mumbling apologies

please humble him and have him sleep outside. the couch is too luxurious to banish him to. he made sure of it himself. it’s reclining and has charging ports. he will not learn his lesson that way

does NOT want you to get a pet or a kid or even another sugar baby/househusband - he wants to be the center of ur attention

speaking of which he HATES it when you work for too long or work overseas. when u come back he’ll pout at u and give u the petty silent treatment

don’t bother trying to comfort him he thrives off of it and he’ll keep going so u can keep paying attention to him. if u just ignore him back he’ll come crawling back to u. “WHY ARE YOU IGNORING ME IGNORING YOU?? DO YOU EVEN LOVE ME ANYMORE???”

one time yall got into a fight and he was all like “since ur being a rude mommy i’ll just find someone else !!!” inside u were like “oh god finally” but instead u said “okay”

ohmygod he panicked. he was rlly expecting for u to fight for him,,, but he doesn’t want to admit defeat first so he tries to go thru with it but you literally dont care. even when he has his chanel luggage packed and he’s standing by the door ur just like “ok bye bitch”

So he’s trying to stand by the door and wait for u to say that ur joking. ur not.

“fine! I’m leaving now!” “okay.” “...*sniffles*” “tooru, go.” “WAAAAH NO IM SORRY I DONT WANT TO-”

u knew this was going to happen sadly. u even hid the keys to all of the sports cars u own just in case he was actually going to go thru with it

tries to get in the gossip circle with the neighborhood trophy wives but they don’t think he’s cool enough. they like u though. they think ur hot asf and oikawa doesn’t like them no more bc theyre hitting on his ATM. but thanks to that u know all the gossip and shit even though u don’t ask for it

Every time u pass by a store where he thinks he wants something he’ll just cling to u and give the puppy dog eyes. like it could be out of nowhere and u see it and you’re like “where. which store.”

bro once he went luxury he never went back. he wouldn’t EVER step foot into a grocery store ever again congrats he’s been bimbo-ified

beat him with ur gucci belt pls it’s so funny

also please please PLEASE discipline him. tell him it’s NOT okay to just randomly purchase the entire swarovski store or to throw a party at ur house just bc he’s feeling petty about u being at work for too long. ofc he’ll bitch about it but you need to be firm

but don’t worry,,,he’ll get the idea when u take away black card privileges and slap him around (lovingly)

now he has to ask permission like a good boy. he’ll kneel and hug u and give a lil pout and whine

you got a bigass man child i’m sorry maam u should’ve picked tobio or ushi

ceo!kuroo

we are: secretary

bruh keeps it mostly professional during work hours

but that all gets shedded off like a snake when we on break

one minute he’s all “get these papers done by today or i swear on all that is holy i will destroy you” and then later he’s all “hey sweetheart wanna grab a cup of coffee”

flirty flirty FLIRTY FLIRTY AAAAA HES A MENACE

but you’re less than impressed bc y’know when the time clocks out and its time to go back to work he’s ruthless once more

HUMBLE HIM FOOL only when you’re on break though

will NOT stand for anyone else in the workplace bullyin u - NO WAY. only HIM

he’s got TONS and TONS of dirt on everyone in the office - NO ONE is safe so they wouldn’t even dare

RIP janet from accounting

that dumb bitch made the mistake of insulting u to ur face and in front of him. never heard from her again

it’s not even limited to the other employees - he’s not afraid to go off on a potential business partner if they dared disrespect you

bruh tries to call u on ur off days for the most randomest shit and to get ur attention

*picks up phone* “sir?” “ah! my favorite secretary ever! listen, i need you to grab my pens from my desk at the office and bring them to my place.” “...with all due respect, it’s 2 am, sir.”

but u have to comply with his ridiculous demands cuz he’s the bank

and he depends on u completely. as much as he hates to admit it - u have his schedules, itinerary, provide coffee, performance rates, stock info, you name it.

once u were out sick and he had the worst management - he’s not used to working without you

def tries to get some of ur workload off of u bc he’s worried that the stress of working for him made u sick + he doesn’t want to go thru scheduling again

prolly gets bored in meeting rooms and sends u little smirks and wiggles his eyebrows and weird looks while he’s sitting and ur standing in the corner like bruh pay attention

maybe sometimes he’s secretly makin fun of the presenter and doodling on his spare sticky note something funny to make u crack a smile

he’ll tease u for it of course “oh, secretary! you should be paying more attention! what would you do if this was important?” bruh i can multitask now keep airdropping me ur selfies i’m saving all of them (news flash: u dont save his dumbass selfies otherwise his ego will inflate too much)

sometimes likes to pull u aside from work to hug u - you say it’s highly unprofessional but he says it’s his stress reliever

you ALMOST got caught by one of the newbies and he was kabedon-ing you

he tries to play it off (since u were embarrassed too) but u know better,,,DO NOT LET HIM FORGET ABOUT IT he turns red and embarrassed every single time USE THIS TO UR ADVANTAGE !!

never goes into an elevator without you bruh is so attached to u n holds the doors open for you

but you have to open normal doors for him if he doesn’t know how it works (hint: manual doors. “why isn’t it opening on its own?” “sir, there’s a handle.” “but?? what does it do??”)

bruh acts like a dumbass sometimes so you can baby him :/// wtf man just because you’re rich doesn’t mean i’ll- ...wait...how much did you say…? that many zeros? HAND ME THAT FORK YES I’LL FEED YOU COME HERE- HERE COMES THE AIRPLANE BITCH

brings u to overseas trips and he spoils u too

no matter how much you insist that you’re ok he gives u a lot of luxurious items. “think of it as a bonus from me.” NOW YOU JUST HAVE A COLLECTION OF NICE SHOES/BAGS/JEWELRY AND HE LOVES IT WHEN YOU WEAR THEM TO WORK IT MAKES HIM SO HAPPY UGHHHHH

BRUH just a sugar daddy at this point “you have to look presentable for the next focus group so here’s a nice rolex watch” “sir, i don’t need-” “ah ah ah - it’s my treat.”

it’s pointless to refuse him but he still teases u for it like what???? “if i didn’t know any better, secretary, i’d say you’re just doing it for my money and not my fabulous looks and personality.” “exactly.” “hey!”

yall go for drinking parties a lot. whether with the whole branch or just the two of u

KARAOKE W KUROO AFTER A LONG DAY OF WORK <333 becomes a ritual between the two of u

he’s so silly when he’s drunk lmfaoooo goofy ass mf

but that’s only when it’s the two of u. he controls his alcohol around others and his uncool side is only for u <3

also ur the only one he trusts to take him back to his place and handle him

it’s the other way around too - when u drink a lot he looks after you <333

you have a higher tolerance than him and sometimes u have competitions between the two of u on who can drink more but then yall always end up shitfaced

HES the one who has a crush on you

you know the drill - gaslight gatekeep girlboss

he’ll do anything for u but wouldn’t ever admit it he simp

offers u the keys to his estate and offers for you to LIVE with him

bruh just marry me already ok WAIT WE’RE NOT EVEN DATING YOU NEED TO WORK ON THAT SIR-

he’s so awkward tryna confess to u,,,he may be this big hotshot ceo but he’s acting like a schoolgirl in love

probably prints u a confession when he asks u to go to the fax machine lmfao what a nerd

in other words ceo!kuroo is a nerd and you need to top him immediately get that bank

dog hybrid!bokuto

we are: owner

Husky-malamute breed!!! BEEG DOGGIE VERY HAPPY N DROOLY <333

OVERLY HYPER. JUMPS ON ANYONE AND U AT ANY GIVEN MOMENT

he’s well trained i swear but the moment he sees something of interest then i’m sorry you just lost him

please if a robber came in he wouldn’t even attack them he’d just tackle them w hugs

he loves loves loves snuggles <333 u busy? nope!!! hug time!!! cooking something?? oo lemme see!!! whoops look at all those tomatos on the ground. u got a deadline coming up and u really need to focus?? CUDDLE TIIIIIIME- w-wait - huh?? why are u shoving me off?? do you - do you not - huh?!?! WHY ARE YOU LOCKING ME OUT OF THE ROOM?? NO!!!! I LOVE YOU!!! IDK WHAT EXAMS ARE BUT I WANT CUDDLES!!! HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME????!!!

the WORST things u could ever do to him is leave him and call him a bad boy

HE CRIES ON THE SPOT </3 HOW COULD YOU </3

soso bummed when u go out of the house without him </333 waits by the door patiently waiting for u to come back </333 sob sob

the moment he hears the door unlock he LEAPS and his tail is wagging like CRAZY

he is SO STRONG. almost always knocks u over whenever he jumps on u

destroys EVERY toy u bring him. u leave him for 5 seconds and there’s stuffing all over the floor and whatever u brought him is nonexistent

tugs on the leash when u walk so much that it SNAPS

loves romping w the other dogs in the dog park but he needs to tone down on his friendliness he almost killed a lil orange chihuahua

gets distracted by EVERYTHING. ooh, squirrel! oo, butterfly! OOO HUMAN CHILD!! MUST EAT!!!

ok while he might be friendly, he still gets super super jealous. you both were outside and u were petting the neighborhood black cat and bruh almost swallowed his head

which u thought was weird bc the two are normally friends and are pretty nice around each other

so now he’s more feisty around him and any other cat that’d get ur attention

If it was a person, then that’s another thing. He’d be very friendly at first but then slowly realize that ur attention is more directed on them than him. then he’d go ballistic

but when u scold him for practically assaulting the poor dude and call him a bad boy,,,he’s lost it

u have to lock him in the other room and he’s crying and whimpering, scratching at the door. all he wanted to do was protect u from that bad bad man who took away his owner’s attention !!!

def snarls at the dude next time he comes into ur house/apartment...dude never came back

“GRRR” “AAAA GET UR FRIGGIN DOG B-” “he don bite” YES IT DO GET UR-”

doggie bokuto rlly tries to be slick...it doesn’t work. like he tries to do that thing when he’s a total demon towards the guy but then act like an angel around u but it doesnt work bc he’s not smooth

doggie intelligence: 2 IQ. one time u got him a puzzle box and hid a treat in it but bruh couldnt figure it out just straight up monched the entire puzzle simply bc he smelled his fav bbq treat in it

speaking of intelligence - he only knows how to say a few words like ur name and incomplete sentences. speaks in barks and whines and sometimes a word

SO BIG THAT HE GRABS FOOD FROM THE TABLE WHEN YOU’RE NOT LOOKING

u had some delicious beef steak? oh dear, where did it go? there’s ur puppy kou with steak sauce all over his lips

big fan of hiking trips, sports, literally anything that involves going out

he LOVES getting dirty outside playing. boi cant control himself from rolling around in the mud

hates baths at first but then he likes how u spray the water on him and giggles awww he likes bath time now

we all know he’s not the brightest pup of the pack but,,,he’s somehow psychic. he knows when ur taking him to the vet

HE THROWS A BIG FUSS ALL THE TIME - sometimes he tries to hide but his huge tail under the couch gives it away

and he knows when ur thinking of taking him on a walk. he also begs u to take him outside by settling his head in ur lap and pouting until u give him what he wants

he likes the big ol doggie sweaters/pjs u buy him...but he always ruins them. no matter how much u buy him, they’re all ruined. he complains how scratchy it is and it feels weird on him

knows LOTS of tricks but if u teach him more than what he already knows he will forget one of them he’s like a damn pokemon

he feels ur emotions :((( if ur mood is down his tail droops :(( and he gives u cuddles and tries to make u feel better

he even likes to make a fool out of himself and be silly if it makes u laugh :((( he’s so precious

in other words i love doggy bokuto

pirate!ushijima

we are: kidnapped

ah yes we’re are captives of the most fearsome pirates of the seas: shiratorizawa

just so you know, tendou was the instigator. he was all “let’s kidnap a noble’s kid and get the ransom money!” (whether you actually are a noble or not is up to you)

thing is, nobody’s willing to pay (if you aren’t a noble) or the pirates really pissed off the folks in charge and are now doing a manhunt

so yeah you aren’t going back anytime soon

but he’s a pretty good sport about it - very hospitable

he notices the little things u like and gets them for u <333 sighs <333

he saw you reading that book? wow look at that, there’s suddenly a stack of them and the same genre he saw you reading

but you definitely shouldn’t test him. he’s SUPER scary when it comes down to it

you saw how ruthless he was with the rogues that had dared to challenge him on sea

mf made them walk the plank

you help on the ship bc u wanna be useful and also shirabu keeps being mean

he asks u to teach the crew how to read cuz theyre dumb as shit and only know water and treasure

speaking of treasure - when he leaves u on the ship to explore a cave, he gets u really pretty jewelry <33 anything u ask for

“oh, welcome back captain. how was your mission?” “i brought back a few trinkets i thought you might like.” *reveals whole chest of priceless gems* “are they to your liking? if not, we can set sail for something else that might interest you.” “I-”

bruh got a pet eagle - u ask the crew and they dont even know how tf it happened

hell, even he doesn’t know how it happened wtf. “oh. one day it flew down to me and i fed it. that’s all.” wtf

equivalent to diluc’s bird - he didn’t even give it a name so he gives u the honors

U name him rigatoni (you got a great naming sense btw)

oh my god oh my god oh my god HE TRIES TO PROTECT U WHEN PPL WERE TRYNA INVADE THE SHIP

it was the first thing he did no cap - burst into ur room and scoops u up <33333

“what the-” “we need to get you to safety. we are under attack.” and holds u close to his chest AAAHSIDHFPSDHFN OH MY LORD YES

HAS THE TEAM GIVE U SELF DEFENSE LESSONS AFTER THAT

tendou tries to give u a sword but ushi says no “she could hurt herself.”

“but ushiwaka! we can teach her not to hurt herself” “...it’s my orders.” “c’mon, be more honest, ushiwaka! what’s the real reason?”

he goes quiet then looks at u “...i’ll always be there to help. she’ll have me.” AOISHSDHFSNDF

HELPPPPP SIOJFDSKFJP HES SO CHARMING AND HE DOESNT EVEN TRY

but the rest of the crew are like “then what’s the point”

but tendou sneaks u a dagger just to be safe

sorry ur apart of the crew now - but they’re like a family even if they did kidnap u

oh whatever your life before wasn’t as cool as this (no offense)

they are given orders to protect u at all costs

speaking of which - ushi isn’t all that great w guns

almost blew his own head off tryna figure out how it works before reon snatched it from him

he brings you with him to towns and cities and he likes taking u to the markets to get you stuff

ushijima tell me your love language is gift-giving without telling me your love language is gift-giving-

he finds out you’re pretty good at bargaining and brings you onshore a lot more

is mesmerized at how you absolutely BERATE the merchant who was tryna rip you off like sis where is this violence coming from??? he loves it??

he also likes to stop by some pretty islands and imagines just settling down in such a nice place w you <333 SIGHS <333 VERY <333 LOUDLY <333

no matter how much he likes you...he will NOT let you drive the boat under any circumstances </3 its his livelihood c’mon man

whenever you have to stay on the ship while he’s away he sends rigatoni to give messages and the two of u talk thru messages

speaking of which rigatoni is fierce and can definitely sink his talons and his sharp beak into any bastard that dares get near you while the captain is away

wakatoshi “swimming is for pussies” ushijima - he’s water resistant

bruh so powerful he walks on water

second coming of christ who

IM JUST KIDDING he does swim but we hardly ever see it

legends say (tendou says) he looks rlly awkward doing it and only knows how to doggie paddle

speaking of our homeboy tendou - he loooves spooking the team (and especially you) with scary stories . don’t worry tho - this is all a ploy to get the beeg pirate husband to comfort u at night ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) he is ur wingman u can count on him. but his suggestions are ridiculous

“Jump off the deck and see if he’ll catch you!” um excuse me- THOU SHALT NOT PUT BIG HUSBAND TO THE TEST

he’s got good intentions...i think…

but everyone literally knows he would dive after you

in other words pirate!ushijima is a softie at heart but goddamn he probably secretly has a pet shark so dont test him or u goin overboard

mafia leader!kita

we are: associate from different group/family

kita highly respects u and yall have been acquainted since u were young with the alliance of ur families

so in a way ur childhood friends but yall do have lil bit of friendly rivalry a bit

arranged marriage whuuuutttt...yeah thats what happened but u love him <3

nobody else knows about ur arranged marriage but you two

POLITE GENTLEMAN <333 !!! HNNNNNNNN his granny raised him right even tho he’s a mafia leader

RICH BOY RICH BOY RICH BOY- ALWAYS DRESSES DASHINGLY AND SMELLS GREAT MMMMMM

he owns the majority of the underground casinos

and has lots of connections with others. countless, might i add.

you on the other hand specialize as an arms dealer so he cherishes your services the most

prob has the traditional tattoos allllll over his back and shoulders w like a dragon or sm and def a fox or kitsune

when u two were little he asked ur favorite flower and GOT THAT TATTOOED ON HIS BACK <3 probably secretly has your initials hidden in there somewhere

u both have a silent understanding of each other and he talks to u more than he does anyone

before he used to smoke but once he figured out that you didn’t like the smell of cigarettes he quit just like that

his underlings, the miya twins are so confused on how kita switches from totally brutal and ruthless to so soft around u

they can’t tease him for it, though, cuz he’d pulverize them

but they want to know more about u,,,you mysterious enigma,,,but kita would kill them if they dared asked about you

so they go to inarizaki’s most secretive informant/cyber mercenary, suna rintarou

and suna knows all about you. he saw you one time and he was curious about who you were and is now rlly scared of you because he dug too deep and you’ve got LOTS of history

he doesn’t dare tell the twins what he found no matter how much they bug him

until they bribe him at just the right price

and when aran finds out and tells kita?? ohhh boy it’s lights out for all three of them

oh my god ,,, would kill for u he loves u so much

one time you were kidnapped and held hostage

bro saw red

MAFIA ANNIHILATION SPEEDRUN ANY % NO GLITCH

he got world record time

wiped out the entire conglomerate behind it - nothing and nobody left behind after that

and of course, made sure you were safe.

yandere? ofc not...i mean...just look at him...so innocent...he would never...sharpening that knife...with splattered blood all over him...

is now joined at the hip with u,,,no matter how much you tell him you’ll be fine now and that you have tons of reliable bodyguards he won’t let it go

“don’t you have to go back to your place?” “this is my duty as both a fellow associate and your future husband.” aww,,,ur so sweet...but BRUH PLEASE GO HOME ARAN IS DOING EVERYTHING OVER THERE

makes sure to build a headquarters DIRECTLY NEXT TO YOURS so that its faster

and it’s not long until he just signs a deal to merge ur factions together (since yall getting married anyways)

and oh my god...ur underground wedding is SO SO PRETTY

absolutely DOESN’T care if he’s smuggling jewels from different countries - he’s having your ring CUSTOM MADE and the way you want it. “the diamond is too small? sure thing, darling, i’ll have it 7 times that size.”

makes sure everything is perfect in ur wedding <333 its very extravagant and even though its not really his style he’ll do anything for you

he absolutely WOULD take your last name if you wanted. FIGHT ME ON THIS

takes you to his private island for ur honeymoon so that the two of you don’t have to worry about work

meanwhile aran is scrambling around the place trying to cover for the both of you

he’s a VERY romantic husband - NEVER takes off his ring even for security. he says its practically a part of him just like you are <3

the ring has a built in tracker connected to an app. possessive? noooo...

in other words this escalated pretty quickly but i aint complaining if it gets me married to kita

--EXTRA EXTRA!! other characters’ roles!!--

officer!daichi:

karasuno squadron consists of:

cops: daichi (duh), asahi (mostly patrol, he hates confrontation), tanaka & noya (mostly accompanied by ennoshita), hinata & kageyama

investigators/detectives: sugawara, ennoshita, yamaguchi, tsukishima, kiyoko, yachi

surveillance: narita, kinoshita, tsukishima too

househusband!oikawa:

makki and mattsun are also househusbands

iwaizumi is a malewife fhasodjkasdhf-

ceo!kuroo:

lev is the newbie that walked in on u two-

janet still a bitch

kenma is his fellow ceo buddy. he also owns a multimillion dollar company and kuroo’s and his have a sort-of contract so you see him a lot in meetings

yaku is like one of the top performing managers so whenever yall have branch meetings he’s there

dog hybrid!bokuto:

kuroo is the black neighborhood cat bokuto almost murdered cough cough i did that on purpose yes i did

kenma is also another neighborhood cat. you don’t see him around that often but now that bokuto got jealous he stays far away.

hinata is the orange chihuahua i briefly mentioned

i couldn’t decide whether akaashi would stay human and be his previous owner or also be a cat/dog/owl. so lets say he’s ur human friend that is your bestie and comes over a lot. bokuto likes him, though. still gets jealous a bit.

pirate!ushijima:

tendou is practically is right hand man

the rest of the team have something to give idk how to explain pirate team members okay-

BUT BUT BUT- they do have sea rivals which are the seijoh pirates. you ran into them one day and oikawa thought you were kidnapped (you were, but you liked it there) so he tried to do you justice and failed miserably. ushijima ragdolled him into the ocean when he flirted w you.

mafia!kita:

the twins are something akin to mercenaries basically. or just plain lackeys.

suna is an informant/cyber mercenary. he gathers information about ppl which is how he knew about you. and he’s a hacker lol.

aran is his second-in-command, omimi + ginjima are his bodyguards

a/n: im going to regret posting this

#haikyuu #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu x you #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu captains #daichi sawamura #oikawa toru #kuroo tetsuro #kita shinsuke #ushijima wakatoshi #bokuto kotaro #x reader

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txdoroki · 4 years

Note

Hello ^^~

May I request Todoroki, Bakugo, Midoriya and Denki's reaction to the readers confession? In which they also have a crush on the reader? 💜

hi! yes ofc,, sorry it took so long for me to get back to you! been busy >,<

since it’s so long it’ll be under the cut :^

include todoroki, bakugou, midoriya, denki, kirishima :P

might do a pt 3, lmk what characters yall wanna see ^-^

part 2 has been done

words: 1696

not edited btw i wrote this at 4am lmk if something doesnt make sense and i’ll fix it ahhhhhhhhhh

todoroki would be like 0-0 the entire time.

“hey todoroki, wanna go out on a date with me? we could go to the movies or wherever, it’s your choice,” you smiled up at him while he walked beside you, carrying both of your bags of schoolwork and books while he stared off at the road in front of you both.

he had always made an effort to do small, caring things for you. he’d hold the door, carry your books, or walk you home after school among many other things. you didn’t think much of it, you’d both been friends for a while, so you figured he was just being kind. no, no that wasn’t it.. he was just bad at showing he wanted to be more than just kind. more than just your friend from a while ago.

he was taken aback by your question, and internally cursed at himself for not asking you weeks ago.

“um, todoroki?” you softly shook his arm when he seemed to have zoned out on the ground, but your bright smile didn’t fade. he adored that from you, he loved how eager you were to spend time with him. to talk with him. to try and learn about him. to do anything at all with him. you were so sweet and understanding, always.

“oh, yeah sure,” he nodded at you, glancing down at you from sheer nervousness that you’d be laughing at him. that it’d be a prank.

when you picked up on how on the edge he seemed to be, you leaned into him a bit, a goofy attempt at ensuring you wanted to go and it wasn’t a forced thing.

“you know, i’ve liked you for a while,” you grinned at him, winking when you saw his eyes quickly flash between content and joy.

“me too,”

bakugou would be like ??!??!?!?!?!?!!???!?!!? who???? me??!?!?!?!?!!?? how??!?!?!?!?!?! screaming internally but on the outside like duhhhh

“hey, bakugou, i have a crush on you, by the way,” you whispered in his ear from behind the beanbag chair he was seated in. him and denki were in the middle of a wii tennis match, mina, sero, and kirishima all focusing on it to see who won.

“what? fucking dumbass, hold on a sec,” he scoffed when you ran your hair through his hair, ruffling it while he tried batting your hand away with his free one.

he tried to maintain focus on the match, lowkey trying to impress you with him winning. it was difficult, his mind kept drifting off to you and your cute face and your cute- back to the game, he’s gotta win. for you. after what felt like forever, he finally won, then dragged you out of denki’s dorm.

“ooo sneaky link?” you heard mina giggle, and the three boys that remained in the dorm roared with laughter.

it got louder when bakugou screamed over his shoulder as he took you by the hand away from the dorm, “fuck off, extra, hell no,”

once you were both out of earshot he smirked, “so, you think i’m hot?” he rolled his eyes when you giggled and nodded, and a blush covered both of your faces, “well, you’re okay, i guess,”

“so when’s the date?” you smiled at him, chuckling when he pulled out his phone to check his fucking calendar app. such an old man.

after a few seconds, he pulled up a date on his phone and turned it to you. only a week from then.. ”february 14,” he winked at you and walked away, not even turning back, “see you at the dorm, dumbass,”

midoriya would be like ≧◉◡◉≦

“all might’s spot as the top hero will not be easily passed by endeavor, or anyone else. he’s great for many reasons, would you like to hear them?” he only paused for a second, turning his head to see your amused nod before immediately continuing, “well first of all his quirk is-”

“midoriya, i wanna date you, if you want,” you interrupted and slowly put a hand on his arm, softly smiling at him.

“huh?” the small sentence shook him from his ranting, and he turned his entire body to look at you. your cheeks heated from the disoriented stare he gave you. he was that shaken up by something you’d said? “really?”

“yes, of course. you’re very handsome and very passionate and ve-”

“yeah of course i’ll date you, thank you, y/n,” he kissed your forehead before turning back to the school hallway, ignoring the excited giggles of his classmates, “okay, so all might’s quirk is obvi....” his mind started wandering to how excited he was at the thought of dating you. it was a dream come true. “oh, sorry, so his quirk is obviously very good for hero w-”

“midoriya, can we go to your dorm after school?” you interrupted him again, smiling sweetly at him. sometimes it was difficult for him to not talk about heroes and all about them all, but you understood and tried helping out with other things.

“oh, of course, sweetie.. hah, can i call you sweetie? or would you prefer just y/n?” he began going on and on about the different things he wanted to call you if you were comfortable, not stopping until you grabbed his wrist and dragged him to both of yours next bell.

ugh, calculus.

denki is like oh.? hehehehehehehehe

you were sprawled out on your best friend’s bed, laying starfish on your back as you huffed about how frustrated and annoying today was. although you held back the most important part. it was especially frustrating how much you adored him. the good ole denki kaminari. you had these feelings for quite a while, trying your best not to confess. i mean, he was a class flirt, he wouldn’t like you back, right?

nah. he hadn’t flirted with anyone other than you in months. and you were the only one that didn’t pick up on it.

“c’mon, y/n, i know you aren’t telling the full story. say what’s on your mind,” denki lightly ran his fingers up and down your right leg. it tickled but not enough to be uncomfortable.

“i can’t,” you groaned, giggling when he rolled his eyes and persisted, saying no matter what he wouldn’t tell anyone.

“if you tell me, i’ll give you five bucks, y/n,” he chuckled when you sighed and finally nodded. when you sat up, he turned so you could tell he was listening to what you had to say.

“fine, but only for the money,” you giggled, “i uh.. i’ve been interested in you for a really long time now.. but i understand if you don-”

wait what

he kissed you, moving his hand up to cup your cheek. your eyes slowly closed, leaning into his touch.

holy shit he kissed you???

when you were let go, your cheeks felt burning hot.

“denk-”

he kissed you again, and you melted into it. it felt like fireworks, euphoria filling your body.

“so does this mean you like me back?” you nervously played with your hands, trying your best to disregard the harsh red blush that was thrown on your face.

“well, duh, took ya long enough,” he chuckled, brushing some of your hair out of your face.

you cried out when you heard the click of his phone camera, and went to hide yourself.

“awe you look so beautiful, y/n. can’t wait to brag about you, baby,” he winked at you, typing something into his phone.

later that day you checked snapchat and saw on his private story the photo of you plus a caption, it read,

“they finally realized, big dummy. y/n if you see this, you’re lucky you’re a good kisser ;)”

you shook your head and ran to his dorm, pounding on the door. you were gonna beat him up.

kirishima is a big ole softie duhhh everyone knows this. he best boy, no arguing!!

you sighed as kirishima held you to his chest, the lovely feeling of your growing feelings for him hummed in your chest. you had tried hard to push it back, how would that work out? would he reciprocate? was this only platonic?

“are you alright, y/n?” he whispered into your neck when he heard the sigh, trying to hide the deep red hue on his cheeks from you.

you both had agreed not to catch feelings for each other, fine at first with just cuddles and sweet compliments. no specific ties to the affections, just a way for the both of you to feel loved. an ideal thing to have, except that both of you were slowly breaking the agreement.

you both ached for each other, but neither of you wanted to be the first to admit it. it was simply too risky.

“y-yeah, sorry, just thinking,”

“awe, no need to be sorry, pumpkin, what’s that pretty brain of yours thinking of?” he ran his fingers through your hair, appreciating the shivers of content that had you moving a small bit in his hold.

when you didn’t respond, he cocked an eyebrow, wondering if you hadn’t heard him or if you just chose to be quiet.

“pebble, what’re you thinking about?” he asked again, gently running his hand up and down your arm.

too deep in your thoughts to actually comprehend you were saying this out loud and not in your head, you whispered, “i wanna date you, i don’t want this to be just platonic. i need to be with you, kiri,”

“oh? you need to?” he smirked, chuckling when your eyes widened as you realized you had actually said that out loud, “well, if it’s a need.. i can make it happen, of course,”

“w-wait what?”

“you said you need to be with me, you weren’t lying, were you?” you slowly shook your head no, avoiding his gaze that bore into your skin, “let’s do that then, how’s that sound, pumpkin?”

“good,” you smiled into his chest, trying to move your hand to your arm to pinch you. were you dreaming?

you weren’t, this was real.

the man you’d liked for a while liked you back, oh hell yeah.

332 notes · View notes

avengersapology-vid · 4 years

Conversation

Avengers: College Edition

Steve: Criminal Justice and Studio Art double major. He doesn't want to torture himself with anything difficult and still wants to study what he loves. He is still an over achiever though. Highkey hates frat parties, saw someone twerking upside down and almost cried but stayed because hes the designated driver (responsible KING). prefers small get togethers with his friends. Roommates with sam and bucky!! Joins Criminal Justice club, jokingly rivals with Engineering (Tonys Club) Everyone on campus loves him including the professors, wins Homecoming king and is very happy. Sam jokingly asks to be his queen, Bucky butts in and says "NO, im his queen". Can be found in the library or art studio, usually with ink or pencil markings on his hands.

Tony: Obvi an engineering KING has physics as a minor. procrastinates to the max "No Bruce I have everything under control" *crams for 46 hours straight on a constant IV drip of Redbull and coffee* Super smart and helps draw the blueprint for the new engineering building. Roomies with Bruce! Tony was in a frat for a bit his freshmen year but hated it and wanted real friends (Throws better parties anyway) met Bruce and all the other avengers during a 1301 intro class. Pulls women like no tomorrow. On the presidents list every semester and tutors math for free on the side. He is basically the Dad in STEM. Tries hitting on Natasha but she is just like :/ nah, when her and bruce start dating tony is surprised because bruce is his "quiet little cinnamon roll." Tony constantly teases bruce and is like "yall fuckin (;" Steve butts in "tONY PLZ I JUST WANT TO WATCH THIS MOVIE" Bruce is thankful for steves intervention. You know how he rivals Steves Criminal Justice club? He butts heads with Business Clubs leader (Pepper) until everyone catches them together at a party. Has a caffeine addiction. Works out with Thor and Bucky one day in the rec and almost dies.

Bruce: Physics and Engineering double major (Hardworking KING) In math club with Vision and Wanda. He loves being roomies with Tony because it helps him out of his shell. Likes to draw with Steve sometimes and enjoys the quiet. Doesn't procrastinate and gets things done in a timely manor. 4.0 icon we all strive to be. Him and Nat already know each other, but bond and get a lot closer while studying in the library and they eventually start dating. He takes her coffee when she works across campus and is always almost late to class because of that (He doesn't care though bc thats his BABY) "Um.. Bruce your class is in 5 minutes" "Okay and?.....Wait I have an ex-" *Sprints to his building* Takes boxing at night with Thor, Bucky, Sam and Steve!!! Loves sparring with Thor and can surprisingly take the big buy on pretty well. Gets his butt kicked by Natasha in a MMA class though.

Natasha: Majors in Criminal Justice and Minors in Psychology. Ballet club AND MOCK TRIAL!! Has a Job at the Criminal Justice Deans office and takes MMA classes on the side. She is on Mock Trial with Loki and they actually get along quiet well once they stop butting heads about the case. Introduces Sam and Wanda to dance and they have so much fun. Coffee dates with Bruce!! Her and Steve become RAs in the following years and are the coolest RAs you know. Prefers night classes, Bruce walks her to all of them. Psychology classes are her favorite and really wants to help children one day. Volunteers at a daycare during breaks. Sis can really out drink Tony and Thor. Puts Wanda under her wing and helps her with fafsa and what not. Her and Bucky get the Russian language credit by simply testing out. Has her sh!t together and while she has a lot on her plate she can take it. She is really the Mom of the group. Can be found dancing or with Bruce. Her and Clint are icons in psychology classes.

Clint: Deaf Studies with education minor! (we stan deaf clint in the comics) In the Archery club and wins nationals for the Uni. Loves to draw with Steve. Helps Bruce ask Natasha out! PRANK ICON! loves to do prank wars with tony, bucky, loki and sam. Was in the same frat with Tony but hated it as well. While he seems to have a more reserved demeanor he is still the life of the party. (Like he knows people at the clubs ya know?) Can get in anywhere and helps everyone rent out a club for the night in celebration of midterms being over. Loves reading in the library and loves morning classes and being productive early in the day. Cracks Tonys netflix and hulu passwords (no tony... tonyr0cks69 is not good enough) Wants to teach at a school for the Deaf. Bruce sets him up with a girl from engineering and that is his future wife.

Thor: Physical Education major and Communications minor! Here on a football scholarship and is in a frat (not the asshole one tony was in) and is a partying ICON. Tries to get Loki to party but Loki just wants to drink wine with the cat he snuck into his dorm. Learns Sign from Clint to prepare for his career in education. Loves working out with Bucky, Sam and Steve. Takes up boxing during football off season and spars with Bruce. Despite being everyones fav himbo he gets really good grades and is a very good writer. Loki dorms across the hall from him. Thor actually rooms with Peter. Peter is the freshman baby and Thor takes peter under his wing and introduces him to everyone and helps him with college stuff in general. Also hooks him up with MJ and brings him to the occasional boxing session. Has a loud booming laughter you can hear in all floors of the library when he sees a funny meme. One time he actually makes a very good point and notices a flaw in one of Tony and Bruces projects leaves everyone stunned. Picks on Loki in big brother fashion. Unironically calls weed the devils lettuce.

Loki: Pre-Law and Criminal Justice. LOVES to argue. (Devils advocate ass) In Mock Trial and Criminal Justice Club. Tony jokingly calls him steves sexy secretary in CJ club. Loves Mock Trial and is the president with Nat as his right hand woman. Sneaks a cat he found at the shelter into his dorm and names it muffin. Stays in the Library writing or going over cases. The one time he was taking Natasha a copy of the Mock Trial case packet and caught her and bruce smooching. (He screeched) "Haha funny joke yall heres the case packet BYE." He automatically texts the group chat "i think nAT AND BRUCE HAVE SOME TEA FOR US HMM". Lets Peter and Bruce come over to his dorm because he knows their roommates can get a little too much sometimes. Loki also becomes an avid twitter user and thats how he gains popularity on campus. (He called the uni out for their awful and expensive parking) Was able to convince the Dean with tony and steve to create a new parking lot. Caffeine addict!!! Him and Tony always bump into each other at the coffee shop. Brings baked goods to meet ups with the gang. Loves to play pranks (especially on Tony) Him and Bucky come up with a genius prank on him and even get pepper involved. Best dressed on campus and is in the fashion club. He is the embodiment of dark academia.

Sam: Criminal Justice Major with Aerospace Engineering minor. Gets introduced to Bucky and Steve during move in and they literally become brothers. Is both in Criminal Justice Club and Engineering Club. In the Historically Black Frat on campus and takes huge pride in that. Parties with tony and thor BIG TIME. Procrastinates by throwing paper airplanes at Bucky until Bucky is like "Um...dude your paper is due in like two hours." At that moment Sam got into work faster than he ever had. Loves gossip sessions with Loki and Wanda. Works out a lot with Bucky, Steve and Thor to get rid of stress. When he and Bucky finish a final they go to loki's dorm and ask "Hey can we see your cat." Helps prep food for friends-giving and decorates the dorm for holidays. HATES 8ams so so so much. Steve promises him pancakes if he gets up and goes. Binge watches shows during weekends and screams when Destiel is finally canon. Loves running and gets a Track Scholarship when Thor gets him to join a sport. Gets Peter to join track.

Bucky: criminal justice major and psychology minor. Buck is also in ballet club with Nat, it really helps him relax and gives him a free space to think (also he runs that shit like no ones business) Criminal justice club as well and LOVES to work out and box. One time Sam accompanies him to ballet and Bucky pushes Sam into a split... the scream was heard for miles. "Sam ballet is good for athletes it helps w-" "Yeah but its not good for my balls" Doesn't willingly procrastinate but once in awhile he will forget an assignment, you best believe his eyes will snap open from his nap and get to work asap. For one of his psyche labs he had to question Steve as if he were Steve's therapist to which Steve responds "Hey bro you dont have to hit a nerve that deep" He also likes to do dance with peter since it helps him get away from Thor for a bit. Not a big partier but once the weight of finals are off his chest you best believe he will go all out. Picks on Nat and says hes gonna steal her man, to which tony interjects and says "Not if I do first" Bucky also has a very comfy dorm, comfy lighting and tons of pillows, the man loves his sleep... and so does everyone else. Sometimes he finds peter, sam, THOR, tONY EVERYONE just napping in his bed before their study time. Overall, bucky is a smart boy and his time in college is kind to him.

Wanda: English Major and Education Minor. After being an orphan Wanda knows what it feels like to not have a parental figure there and she wants to change that for other kids by becoming an english teacher. She volunteers at an orphanage, specifically the one her and pietro were in for a brief moment when they came to the states. She loves to draw as well and takes plenty of art classes with steve. She paints a portrait of the entire gang and gives it to tony as a graduation present (he cried). She loves to do volunteer work for children and also spend a lot of time in the library, She helped Nat calm down before Bruce asked her out. Her and Loki are in constant competition for best dressed. "Loki ill let you win best dressed but you have to let me see your cat" "ugh fine... btw your shirt doesnt match your boots" "hEY" Her and Peter take alot of intro classes together and are constantly running around craft stores trying to get the right stuff for projects. Visits Vision at his Job on Campus and he visits her where she volunteers and eventually they start dating. She is constantly getting visited by pietro at 4am asking "Um do you have milk" "Pietro its 4am what do you ne-" "my OREOS"

Pietro: Track star business major, frat ICON with Thor. poor boy is STRESSED he hates college and is here on a track scholarship, constantly late and running around getting shit done. Queen of late assignments but still gets them graded because he is in Track. Yeah he has alot on his plate but he still parties with thor for hours. When he is drowning in assignments Clint is always there to help him, Bruce also helps him with biology and the more science-y classes. Likes to mess around and race sam at track practice. Not into coffee but will run on all the monster energy drinks you could possibly buy. Seriously is tired of 8 a.m courses, he just wants to nap after practice. Walks into the study room that everyone was in and actually looks more sleep deprived than tony. He gets a lot of tips from steve on how to have an easier time in college and it really helps him.

Vision: Grad student working on a civil engineering masters and a TA. Meets Wanda in the library and she asks him where the biographies are. He mistakenly says they are on the 2nd floor "Uh theyre actually on the third" "Then why did you ask?" "Cause I wanted to talk to you :)" He swooned. Through Wanda he met Tony and Bruce and became their best friend, He helped out a lot with engineering club and got them far. He spends a lot of time doing research for his masters degree, he loves relaxing with the group on weekends and picks on pietro as if he is already apart of the family. Him and Loki bond over intellectual conversations from time to time. Bruce and Nat go on double dates with him and Wanda. Went to a bar once with tony and bruce and had to stop tony from singing Queens entire discography, he had the best night that night. Helps everyone with getting into jobs and into grad school in general while everyone helps him let loose and have some fun.

Peter: Peter is a Physics major and eventually works his way up to biochemistry. (hardworking icon) He is the freshman baby of the group and is introduced to them through Thor. He dances with Buck and Nat sometimes as well. Tony obviously takes peter under his wing and helps him with assignments. One time everyone was in the same study room and him and pietro have a redbull shot gunning challenge. When Peter wins Thor picks him up and almost yeets the poor boy into the ceiling. "VERY WELL DONE YOUNG PARKER YOU SHOULD BE DOING THAT WITH BEER IN NO TIME." "Thor plz" Tony and Thor help him ask MJ out and even spy on them during a dinner date. (Imagine thor with sunglasses and a scarf around his head pretending to be tonys date) He feels so accepted in college because of the gang and gets all his work done on time. Goes out of his way to get everyone christmas presents and is so excited for friendsgiving. Becomes a little stressball during finals and midterms and stays in the library till it closes. He spots loki alot in there and helps loki with science classes while loki helps him with political science classes. He meets MJ through wanda and is obviously blushing the whole time while being introduced. Gets embarrassed when the guys flirt with aunt may. "guys plz stop" This is when Sam earns his "milf hunter" nickname. "Pete hows your aunt?" "She doesnt want you sam i-" its not like that... actually it is like that"

Coulson: Alumni Icon. Is the gangs Intro professor and is the reason why everyone meets eachother. (the class was chaotic indeed) Coulson loved that class so much and he still gets visited by everyone from time to time. He is obviously close with Nick. They were there that night when Tony was signing Queen at the bar and couldnt help but laugh.

Nick Fury: Dean for criminal justice and is heavily involved with criminal justice club and mock trial. He is tired of everyones shit as always. Makes a tiktok account for the criminal justice club and has no idea how to manage social media so gets Loki to help. Has to delete it when Loki commented "hah losers" on the engineering tiktoks page. He looks intimidating but in his office he has a picture with the club and has all the gifts he gets on display. (He even framed lokis comment because it was hilarious afterall)

117 notes · View notes

nekobadassclub · 4 years

Text

LATE !

At school with M/n who is looking for his friends who are running late 🤭

M/n:Are yall coming to school today Yes or No 🤔

Jin: Yes we running late because of someone

Namjoon: Hey M/n is the teacher in the class yet

M/n:Not yet why how far away are yall?

Jungkook : is that a meme of me ?

Namjoon: Yep Jun got all the memes of everyone but were getting off topic here

Jungkook: were a hour away M/n😅

Jimin : is she in class now M/n

Yoongi : No she can't be she always late

M/n : And those are facts she never on time which I don't mind because it give me time to finish homework from my other classes because I be staying up and reading Wattpad or watching horror movies and games 😔

Jin : Wait did we have homework 🤔

Taehyung : Yes we did it was a 10 page essay about something we watched I did mine on watching M/n trying to make the devil his bitch😐

Yoongi : wait what M/n doing what now

M/n : Taehyung nobody was supposed to know that but anyways I did mine on vines

Jungkook : I did mine on Iron Man

Namjoon : I did mine on friends

Yoongi : I did mine on sleeping

Hoseok : I did mine on dancing

Jimin : I did mine on hanging out with friends

Jin : I forgot we had homework 😓

M/n:

Namjoon: Is she in the class yet cause we at the gate 🤨

M/n: she's not here yet 😐

Jin: Good I hope she forgot about the homework 🙂

Yoongi: She probably didn't she never does 😒

Jin:

Hoseok : were almost to the class 🤗

BTS walks in the class and goes to their seats that is near M/n

M/n : She really late today so Jin you'll probably finish the essay before she gets here if everyone of us does one part 😎

Jin: Yes 😆

A few minutes they all helped Jin finish his essay and the teacher still hadn't arrived yet

M/n: Guys you know what I just noticed 😓

M/n: Nobody here but us .......

Yoongi : I'm check the sign 🤨

Hoseok: Guys today's a teacher work day that's why nobody here😔

M/n: but the teachers not here either 🤔

Hoseok : because everyone when home and were locked in the school until tomorrow🤭

Jungkook: Were all gonna fucking die 😭

Jimin: What do you mean we are locked in here until tomorrow 😅

Yoongi:

Taehyung: Should we I don't know call the police

Namjoon : The police would just laugh as if we're pranking them 🥲

Jin: This is why we should have check before coming to school but why was the doors left unlocked for anyone to walk in to the school 😐

Hoseok: That I do not know 😑

M/n: So we stuck in the school until tomorrow 😔

Hoseok: pretty much 😓

Taehyung :

M/n: What type of game

(((＼（＠v＠）／)))

Jin: I wouldn't have ask that Jigsaw games is usually life or death 😐

Namjoon: Jigsaw is not real he just a made up horror movie character 🙄

M/n: Actually Jigsaw is real Namjoon google the story 🤗

Yoongi: We could jump out the window since we on the first floor but the alarm to the school may go off 💀

Hoseok: Yeah and glass may pierce you so nah I'm good 😑

M/n : What type of game 🤔

While they are busy talking they don't notice the principle car is still outside 😶

M/n: 12 True Creepy SCHOOL TEACHER Stories From Reddit: https://youtu.be/DzOrW0zJAxk

Jin: I'm not watching that nope no

Taehyung: looks like our teacher doesn't 😂

M/n : Yep maybe it is our teacher 🤣

Jungkook: Guys there a car outside

Everyone runs towards the window and notices the principal car still there

Namjoon: That's the principle how can we get him notice where in the school ?

Yoongi : Throw something out the window to get his attention

Jimin : M/n give us your laptop

M/n : Hell Nah to the nah nah

Hoseok throws out M/n notebook with his essay in it out the window

M/n : my work 😭

The principle looks up after getting out his car

Principle : Wtf was that

The principle picks up M/n notebook and looks up and see everyone arguing about what to throw out the window to get his attention that they stuck in the school

Principle : Well let me get them out of there 😑

The principle unlocked the door then walked to the classroom they are in and opened the door

Principle : Get the fuck out 😑

Jungkook: were free

Jimin: thank you so much for coming back

Taehyung : .....

M/n: Fuck this shit I'm out mhmm fuck this shit out

And Everyone when home except M/n and BTS who when to eat

M/n : wait a minute were is my fucking notebook ?

Hoseok : The principle kept it 😅

M/n: my essay was in there now i'm have to write it all over again

Jimin : or you could go see the principle when school is back on Monday so you can get your essay

M/n: there were more then just my essay in that notebook guys remember my how to get away with murder plan

Yoongi : your one way to get money without working plan as well

Taehyung : and your how to be a high class stripper plan

M/n : hey hey that plan worked and yall know it

Jin : yeah it did but those plans can get you suspended or land you in jail

M/n : i'm go cry in a corner now 😢 😭

Jimin hugs M/n : its ok we'll sneak in and get the book back

Namjoon: how we have no idea where the principle live?

M/n : actually I do 😅

Hoseok : how do you know where the principle live

M/n : that's a long story I need something to get of trouble and I was walking home back from the park and noticed the principle in a house with a cheerleader outfit on and heels while dancing and singing along to Milkshake so i recorded it just in case I get in trouble and to black mail him when I do get in trouble

Taehyung : Wow just use that video to get your notebook back Monday

Taehyung has signed off

M/n : that's the plan see ya Monday guys

M/n has signed off

Jimin has signed off

Jin has signed off

Jungkook has signed off

Namjoon has signed off

Hoseok has signed off

Taehyung has signed out

Yoongi has signed out

#kpop male reader #ot7 x reader #bts x male reader

49 notes · View notes

haikyutee · 4 years

Note

WAIT DO THE WHATS GOOD SWHATY IS YOUR MAN STILL AROUND PRANK W KARASUNO WISGXLFHVHV

NO CAUSE THIS IS MY FAVOIRTE ONE

daichi

would probably be driving you to get something to eat or sumn

you can’t tell me daichi don’t be driving AND a looking hot AS HELL in the process

got one hand on the steerin wheel and one on the gear shift like stop playin wit somebody feelings 😃

chile anyways so you decide to do this trend cause y’all was chillin at a stop light and traffic had been a lil busy

you whip out your phone and play the sound or whatever and he barely even glances over cause he usually doesn’t mind if you call your friend or sumn right quick

dude hears the “what’s good shawty” and he turns to YOU AND IS LIKE 😀

he knows you ain’t just do that junk in HIS mf car like you lost yo mind

HE SNATCHED THAT MESS OUT YO HAND LIKE “gimme that shit 😠”

ends up tossing it back in your lap cause you reallyyy just caught him off guard wit that 😔

if y’all end up getting ice cream and you go to lick it or whatever (some of y’all bitches bite your ice cream like huh) he’ll push the cone into your face so it gets all up in your nose for payback 😼

sugawara

OK YALL WOULD BE IN THE DAMN GROCERY STORE

this FERAL ASS BITCH IS A TICKING TIME BOMB

he already talking about some “ don’t touch anything i’m tryna get outta here quick 🙂”

DEFINITELY ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE WHO WILL SPAZ IF YOU HOLD ONTO THE CART

y’all would be just looking in the snack isle and then when it’s time to go you’d grip the side of the cart while he pushes it and as soon as you do it he comes to a complete stop and is like “get yo hand off my shit 😃” or “GET OFF THE CART 🤬”

you’d get a few stares no lie

but you decided to do this trend while he was looking at chips or something idk

heard the facetime sound and was like wth we are in a store

as soon as the man starts talking he looks over at you SO FAST

does the face that moms do when they tell you to stop actin up in the store and says “ give me your phone. now. 👹”

tries to get it from you but you give in and tell him it was a prank

“you’re not getting SHIT for dinner lol starve 🤪”

ends up feeding you anyway unfortunately

asahi

was probably in the shower

you didn’t even mean to do it to him honestly

you were just scrolling through tiktok and it ended up playing it by accident

homeboy comes out the shower right when it plays and FREEZES

you felt his presence so you look behind you and he’s just standing there in his towel awkwardly

“🧍”

most likely just laughs it off

brings it back up before y’all sleep

you bust out laughing which kinda makes him feel better no cap

you weren’t getting defensive so that was a good sign

LITERALLY LOOKS LIKE “🌝” AFTER YOU EXPLAIN IT WAS A TIKTOK

MANS SAID SAY LESSSS AND ROLLS OVER TOLAYS ON TOP OF YOU

he a huge ass man so have fun wit that 😜

tanaka

honestly already saw it lol

i can imagine tanaka on his phone all the damn time especially when he’s home like the bitch is always in his mf hand

so you’d be sitting on a bench outside a store waiting for his sister to pick y’all up

he’s already scrolling through tiktok lmao

y’all talked for a good 15 minutes but then it was “cool down” time yk what i mean

you being on your phone you come across the trend and you’re just SO sure it’s gonna work you’re just thinking “oh yeah, this is gonna get em’ 😼”

he kinda just dies inside a little when he hears the facetime ringing like he knows you guys aren’t really talking rn but damn you really left him to his phone huh 😢

hears the voice and at first he is VISIBLY CONFUSED

forces himself to think for a split second and realizes “ohhhh it’s that video”

says “oh i saw that lol”

you know when you send someone something and they say they already saw it

yeah this is the same feeling

if you pout he’ll slide over to your end of the bench and smother you

his sister ends up having to yell at y’all to get in because you weren’t listening

nishinoya

✨pherell ✨

feral but spicy 😼

nah dude just crazy

chases you around the house

it’s like ring around the rosy but with furniture but also if he catches you you’re 𝒹𝑒𝒶𝒹

it started when you turned your phone volume up so he’d hear it from the kitchen

it ECHOES and you just cringe at how you KNOW his ass heard it 😃

USED TO BE DOING THE DISHES KEY WORDS USED TO

AS SOON AS THE CLANKING STOPPED YOU FR GOT SCARED SKSOSN

LIKE THERES NO GOING BACK NOW

you hear his footsteps and don’t even wait for him to get there you just run 🏃‍♀️ 💨

EVERYTIME YOU LOOK BEHIND YOU YOU SEE HIM “ 👹” AND ITS SCARY

I CANT BRETGW

FINALLY GRABS YOUR ARM AND YOU ALMOST HAVE A HEART ATTACK BECAUSE OF THE SUDDEN DOOM

you are QUICK to tell him it was fake

probably gives you wet willies when you least expect them throughout the rest of the day

you have to guard yourself around him now

it’s like whenever someone tickles you and then you flinch when they move because you think they’ll do it again

ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE WHO HAS THE NERVE TO SAY “what’re you flinching for? 🤣😈” OH MY GOD

hinata

taking care of his sister for the weekend while his parents are on vacation

you were invited but you were going to come to his house either way because his little sister LOVES you

you get her in on it honestly

so you’re sitting on the couch and going over the plan while hinata is fixing up snacks

he can’t really hear y’all from the kitchen so it’s perfect

the plan is now in full affect

his little sister casually strolls into the kitchen and says “who’s that guy y/n is talking to?”

THIS DUMBASS RUNS TO YOU BUT TRIPS OVER HIS SISTERS SHOES SHE LEFT IN THE HALLWAY EARLIER

by the time he gets to you it’s the “what’s good shawty” and before you could turn around he grabs your phone from behind the couch and it SCARES THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF YOU

learns it’s fake and is all like oh wooooow

complains about getting tag teamed

comes up with ways to get you back and tells his sister but she keeps tattling on him 😔

tsukishima

YALL OM SO SORRY BUT I CANT SAY NUN BOUT THIS MAN EXCEPT FOR THAT FACT THAT HED JUST BE LIKE “this bitch tried it 🙄” LIKE AJAKAKJ

i feel like you’d be hanging out at his house working on a project or something and y’all took a break

he’d hear the facetime noise and just “😐” LIKE HE KNOWS YOU AIN CALLING SOEMONE WHEN YOUR TRYINF TO FINSIH A PROJECT

heard the “what’s good shawty” and goes “pfft”

mans knows you playin because you really thought you was just gon bust that out outta nowhere

probably thinks you’re dumb 💀

like if you were actually cheating on him you’d be smart enough not to answer your other mans call right? he hopes so

pack it up mr. peabody and sherman 🙄

yamaguchi

poor baby

was cuddling with you 😔

it hurted to play the sound but you had to

when it first started, he was perfectly content with you being on the phone like he was honestly about to fall asleep with his head on your stomach anyway 😌

he was zoning in and out trying to watch the movie y’all put on

then the dude started talking and ISJAN POOR BABYYYY

raises his head up like 🥺

YOU HAVE TO TELL HIM ITS NOT REAL IMMEDIATELY

APOLOGIZE NEOW 😡

whines your name

“y/nnnnnn 🙁”

he’s still groggy from being tired but tries to make a mad face

looks cute instead

like super super cute

you had to give him kisses 😤

kageyama

literally didn’t even fucking hear it SKAKJKS

i feel like he would just be doing something and either not care or not hear it AT ALL

he was on The Game ™ and in the middle of a hard part at that

you played that shit with a smirk on your face and he gives you nothing 😎

doesn’t even turn around

doesn’t even glance 👀🚫

you are flabbergasted

appalled

astonished

this bitch get on your nerves on god 😀

and when you tell him what you were trying to do earlier he’s like 🤨

kageyama would literally be the FACE of “chile anyways”

what if he like smacked you upside the head with the CONTROLLER MAKAJWJ BRUH IM DTING

“this bitch tried it 🙄” pt.2

51 notes · View notes

heavyhitterheaux · 2 years

Text

You Put it There

First Lady of Private Garden Fic

AN: always have insurance if you want to prank the first lady

Synopsis: Jack gets you back with pranking you by thinking that there is a hickey on his neck and all hell breaks loose

Pairing: Husband!Jack Harlow x Wife!Reader

Please Do Not Repost My Content Anywhere

Jack was serious when he had told you to watch your back and may the best Harlow win. You had been on your guard all week and Jack purposely didn’t do anything because he wanted to catch you when you least expected it. So, he did the same exact thing you did, brainstormed with PG about which prank to pull on you.

Jack had made a final decision and no one from PG was on board because they knew you were about to flip your shit.

They knew that you were probably going to beat your husband’s ass as well as theirs and they were trying to avoid that at all costs.

But your hard headed husband wasn’t about to listen.

He was going to get Curse to put makeup on his neck that resembled a hickey and your older sister Danielle was going to make sure she kept you occupied so that Yasmin could work her magic.

“Jack, are you really going through with this?” Shloob asked while looking nervous as Yasmin was adding the makeup.

“Will yall relax? I need to get her ass back!”

“But ehhh, do we have to do this one?!? I’m about to start planning your funeral because…. Your wife…. Have you met your wife? Because I feel as though because you about to pull this shit, I don’t think you have.” 2fo said while eyeing Yasmin’s makeup job.

“I have insurance.” Jack replied while shrugging.

“What insurance do you have?!”

“You know how she loves Titanic and makes me and Urban watch it with her every fucking time it comes on?”

“I’m not following.”

“I got her an expensive ass replica of that fucking necklace. She’ll fold from the minute she sees it.”

“Oh, smart man. But I’m still about to start planning your funeral. Don’t worry I’ll call the parents.” Quiiso added.

“Then it’ll finally be my turn.” Clay said while smiling.

“Clay, we are on the second floor in my house. I will throw you out the window. You and Dua need to stop stressing me the fuck out.”

“Yeah, because you about to be bald by thirty.” Yasmin added and Jack rolled his eyes.

“Y/N will just have to slap his head during sex because there won’t be any hair left.”

All of them busted out laughing as Jack was just sitting there shaking his head.

“Clay, imma kick your ass.”

“Okay! All finished! How does it look yall?” Yasmin exclaimed, stepping back and admiring her work.

“Damn, that shit looks legit.”

“Fuck, we about to die. That looks a little too real.” Shloob was already saying a silent prayer.

“Urb, you better hold your best friend back when she sees that.” 2fo said while looking at Jack’s neck.

“So she can beat my ass too?! Hell nah, I’m letting her at her husband.”

“Okay yall, it’s showtime.”

You and your sister had been out spending time with each other all day when the two of you finally made it back to your house.

Jack had already told you that PG and Yasmin were there and you decided to make tacos and a nacho bar for them since it has been a while since you made it.

Once you stepped through the door, you were immediately greeted by your husband.

“Hi boo bear!” You exclaimed while he picked you up and your legs immediately went around his waist.

“Hi my pretty baby.” Jack responded while he leaned down to kiss you.

“GROSS!”

“Uh Urban…. You and your girlfriend do the same exact thing so imma need for you to shut your ass up and let me love on my wife.”

“Still gross.”

“You know he’s been saying that since we were 15.” You said as you kissed Jack’s nose and he set you back on the ground.

“He’ll be saying it for the rest of his life.”

You had yet to notice the “hickey” that was on Jack’s neck and moved about the kitchen with Shloob helping you make everything.

Shloob figured that this was his insurance because he didn’t want any type of smoke from you.

Your sister, Danielle was eyeing Jack’s neck and was amazed at how good it looked. She simply sent him a text not wanting to bring attention to it out loud because you would notice.

Dani- Jack, that looks a little too real

Jack- I know! Yasmin is amazing!

Dani- Uhh that’s not what I meant. I meant that Y/N is probably going to put you six feet under when she sees it. Yall haven’t even made me an aunt yet.

Jack- I have insurance. She’ll see it and forgive me

Dani- What is it?

Jack- a necklace

Dani- Yeah, she’ll fold lol

The food was finally finished and everyone was now sitting around the table enjoying it. You already knew if you posted a picture of the food that Druski would feel some type of way since it was the norm for him to always miss out when you cooked.

“What did you buy today, Y/N? All them damn bags I saw.” Yasmin asked as she took another bite of her taco.

“Things.”

“Elaborate please, what the hell we supposed to do with that?” 2fo asked while looking over at you.

“Things for my husband’s eyes only.”

“GOT DAMMIT CAN YALL CHILL?!”

“WELL YALL FUCKING ASKED!”

“Please get her pregnant soon so we can get a break from these stories.” Ace said while looking over at Jack who stifled a laugh.

“Hmm, do yall honestly think that’s about to stop us?” Jack questioned while smiling and looking over at you. You couldn’t do anything but smile back and brush a hand through his curls.

“Might make it worse because of his breeding kink.” You confessed and both of you started to laugh.

“JESUSSSSSS HAVE MERCY!”

“Are kinks are off the table for yall to discuss when we’re eating?! Got damn?”

“I mean yall are eating, but… there is one that is my absolute favorite.”

“Do tell!” Curse exclaimed while raising her hands in the air.

“I’ll wait until yall are done.”

“As kinky of a bitch that you are, I wanna know NEOW!”

“Urban, cover your ears since you always exclaim how you’re a virgin.”

“But I am.”

“I know otherwise from previous activities and you haven’t been since 14.”

“Stop stalling!” Dani yelled while pointing her fork at you.

You mumbled your answer and only Jack had heard you and looked down to continue eating his food.

“Bitch, you know good and damn well we didn’t hear you. Jack, what she say?”

“She likes when I spit in her mouth.”

“TIME OUT! TIME FUCKING OUT!”

“FLAG ON THE GOT DAMN PLAY!”

“OOHH, I KNEW FIRST LADY WAS A NASTY BITCH! ME TOO, GIRL!”

Everyone was laughing as you turned your head to look at Jack and caught sight of his neck and immediately got quiet.

“Baby?” You calmly asked, trying not to flip the table over.

“Yeah, mamas? What’s wrong?”

“What is that on your neck?”

“Oh fuck.” Shloob said while suddenly becoming more interested in his nachos.

“What?”

“Jackman, you heard what I asked you. What is that on your neck? Now if you make me repeat myself again, I’m kicking your ass.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, baby girl.”

You took a deep breath before turning to the side to fully face him.

“What’s the bitch’s name?”

“Who?!”

“Clay, have Maggie on speed dial because I am about to MURDER her oldest child.”

“Better for me so I can marry you then.”

“Clay, go away.” Jack said while attempting to take some of the heat off of himself but it didn’t work.

“Nuh uh, Jackman Thomas. Answer my question.”

“Baby, I literally have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Oh, hmm okay. WHY IS THERE A FUCKING HICKEY ON YOUR NECK THAT I DIDN’T PUT THERE?”

“Oh damn, now she yelling. I just wanted to eat my food.”

“What? You put it there this morning.”

“LIES YOU TELL! I PUT IT ON THE OTHER SIDE!”

“You sure? I remember it being this side.”

“Jack drop that bitch’s location right now. After I finish kicking her ass for touching my man, you’re next.”

“How you gonna kick my ass when the only person I have ever had sex with is you?”

“THEN HOW DID THAT GET THERE?!”

“YOU PUT IT THERE!”

“DID NOT!”

“DID TOO!”

“See, okay. Imma have to choke you now.”

“Damn, I like the way you think mamas.”

“Oh goodness, here they go.”

“Not in front of my taco, please.”

“Jack, I will choke you until you turn blue and pass out. Shouldn’t take long since you already pale as shit anyway.”

“MAMAS!”

“PG, who the fuck has been over here today?”

Silence.

“Oh, okay so yall admit?”

“WHAT?! NO!”

“We literally just got here 2 hours ago! Leave us outta this!”

“I’m still kicking yall asses because yall are guilty by association.”

“WE DIDN’T DO ANYTHING!”

“URBANNNNN! WHO HAS BEEN OVER HERE?!”

“Just me and Yasmin.”

“Wrong answer, imma kick your ass too.”

“But….!”

“Husband, since you wanna play games, use your hand for a month.”

“A MONTH?! A MONTH?!”

“YOU GOT DAMN RIGHT! I DIDN’T PUT IT THERE!”

“I NEED MY DICK WET! A MONTH?! YOU TAKING THIS A LITTLE FAR MAMAS!”

“I AIN’T TAKING SHIT TOO FAR! LET ME FIND OUT WHO THAT BITCH IS!” You made a motion to touch Jack’s neck over where the hickey was and it rubbed off.

You were speechless.

“You….. JACKKKKKKK!”

“Got ya mamas!”

“IMMA FUCKING KILL YOU!”

“I told you to watch your back!”

You simply rolled your eyes and turned away from him and took a sip of the mango margarita that you had made.

“Aww, come here baby.” Jack said while attempting to pull you onto his lap.

“We’re getting divorced.” You muttered as you crossed your arms and Jack simply kissed your cheek while everyone was laughing.

“Jack, we told you not to do it!”

“YALL WERE IN ON IT?!”

“What did you expect, baby? You told them about the two pranks you did on me. And no we’re not and I got a peace offering for you.”

“I don’t want it. You’re sleeping in the bathroom.”

“GOT DAMN, she didn’t even say the couch!”

“I highly doubt that once you see what this is.”

“Nope.”

Jack had pulled out the necklace and opened it to where you could see it, but you refused to turn your head.

“Come on,Y/N, look at it!” Clay said but you weren’t budging.

“Baby, I got it specially made for you and this shit was not cheap.”

“Don’t care, suck my dick.”

“I plan on sucking that clit later if we’re being honest.”

2fo choked on his water while Ace busted out laughing and Yasmin was just sitting there smiling.

This went on for another ten minutes before you finally gave in.

You finally sat straight on Jack’s lap facing the table and your jaw immediately dropped.

“Is… is that what I think it is?!”

“Yes, I figured I needed insurance after pulling this.”

“But?”

“Had a jeweler pull some strings for me and specially make it for you.”

Jack undid the clasp and put it around your neck and you were still in shock.

“Wow, it’s pretty and kind of heavy.”

“Only the best for my wife.”

“Jack, I want you to draw me like one of your French girls.” You said while glancing up at him and everyone began to laugh.

“At least I know you would’ve moved over on the door so I wouldn’t die.”

“Who the…. Who said that?”

“BABY!”

“I’m just kidding, Pookie! Of course I wouldn’t let anything happen to you!”

“You better not.”

“If you do, I’m available.”

All Jack did was throw a tortilla chip at Clay while he was laughing.

“Favorite Harlow child my ass.” Jack muttered while shaking his head.

“Anyway, you know I only do the best for my wife.”

“Mm hmm, you don’t say?”

“Say what, baby?”

“You have a lot of making up to do for this.”

“That’s why I got the necklace!”

“Hmm, I hope you didn’t think that would be enough.”

“Uhh?”

You then began to sing.

“Imma ride you like a rodeo. Hogtie you like a rodeo, cowgirl like a rodeo.”

“Welp, this was fun soooo I’m about to get a head start on my punishment from wifey.” Jack said before standing up from the table to throw you over his shoulder and you immediately let out a yelp.

“Literally a head start.” Yasmin said while laughing.

“Here they fucking go.”

“Wait, who did the makeup on your neck?” You curiously asked while you were upside down and everyone looked over at Yasmin.

It was quiet for a few seconds, but you immediately knew that there was no other person who could be behind it.

“CURSEEEEEE!!!”

“Whew! Would you look at the time! See yall later. Love you mamas and uhhh this was 1000% Jack’s fault.”

“Why do I always get blamed for everything?!”

“Because you are always fucking doing something.”

Liked by y/ninsta, danivalentine, urbanwyatt, softtcurse, 2forwoyne, shloob_, privategarden, saweetie, and 3,257,984 others

jackharlow: I finally got her back lmaooo I wanted to take a picture of her and it took me 20 minutes to get her to stop looking mean in the pic, this was the result 😂

y/ninsta: jackharlow you lucky I ain’t kill you 😡

danivalentine: y/ninsta oh please you would never kill your pookie

jackharlow: 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

acepro: y/ninsta WE WARNED HIM TO PICK SOMETHING ELSE

druski2funny: what yall do this time?

danivalentine: druski2funny Jack pretended to have a hickey on his neck

druski2funny: jackharlow oh so you was just asking to die, huh?

lilnasx: y/ninsta should have mopped the floor with you. she don’t play about her mans 😭😭

urbanwyatt: blame softtcurse

softtcurse: not my own boyfriend throwing me under the bus 😐

y/ninsta: PG, I am rocking all yall shit! don’t expect to get fed when you come over either!

2forwoyne: y/ninsta now wait a minute! we told him not to do it! the beef is with your husband, not us!

y/ninsta: 2forwoyne no short ribs for you

jackharlow: I made up for it!

saweetie: jackharlow how?!

jackharlow: saweetie HER HEART WILL GO ON WITH THE NECKLACE I BOUGHT HER

sza: jackharlow no your ass didn’t get that necklace from Titanic

urbanwyatt: sza he did and it was a good idea too because y/ninsta was about to to kill him 😭

y/ninsta: cowgirl like a rodeo!

jackharlow: y/ninsta punishment times six?? because I’m ready

champagnepapi: TIMES SIX?! WHAT THE FUCK YALL DOIN OVER THERE?! SIX?!

quiiso: champagnepapi oh this is nothing. it’s actually light compared to the usual

champagnepapi: well got damn

dualipa: ohhhh y/ninsta!!!

jackharlow: dualipa get the fuck off my post

dualipa: I didn’t even do anything jack!

jackharlow: dualipa YET! BE GONE!

y/ninsta: jackharlow well come on then, how about in reverse this time?

jackharlow: shit, let’s go

claybornharlow: nasty asses. keep it down because in case you forgot, I’m staying with yall all week

jackharlow: claybornharlow I ain’t forget, come here y/ninsta!!!

y/ninsta: jackharlow say less!

dualipa: y/ninsta hickey prank you say? hmm I can put one on you for real

jackharlow: dualipa you just want to catch all this smoke, huh?

dualipa: jackharlow no not at all. I’m catching her nut in my mouth

jackharlow: y/ninsta she is officially banned from coming over our house

dualipa: jackharlow hmm funny. see you in 2 days.

jackharlow: dualipa just because you show up doesn’t mean I have to open the door

y/ninsta: jackharlow dualipa you two are a hot ass mess. everyone know Jack is the only person who will ever get hickeys from me

dualipa: y/ninsta for now

jackharlow: dualipa show up in 2 days and imma have a blow torch

y/ninsta: JACKMAN!!!

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