#cal jacobs

[midnight-sally]

Rue Bennett, Euphoria, Season 1 Episode 7 "The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Pee While Depressed"

[zendayastan]

Favorite episode 🪽

[euphoriashots]

Euphoria - Cal & Jules and Nate & Cassie

[blueribbonbaby]

Euphoria behind the scenes photos

[taylorswiftt1]

Euphoria cast

[k-wame]

і'ᥣᥣ rᥱᥲᥣᥣᥡ ᥣіkᥱ 𝗍᥆ sᥱᥱ 𝗍һᥱ ᑲᥣ᥆᥆⍴ᥱr rᥱᥱᥣ 𝖿᥆r 𝗍һᥱіr sᥴᥱᥒᥱs s᥆mᥱძᥲᥡ

[manicpixiefelix]

okay so i've started watching Euphoria with my girlfriend (unfortunate for us since its trash) HOWEVER we have been coming up with an absolutely unhinged Saltburn crossover AU (we're only halfway through s1 so bare with me).

It's 2019. Saltburn's canon happened 12 years ago.

Guidance Councillor Farleigh, back in America, in his early 30s, having to deal with everything that's happening at that fucking high school

absolutely winded to meet this kid who's just like eighteen different problems in the shape of his dead cousin (Nate)

also hates this kid (for obvious reasons) but can't say that (because he's a guidance councillor)

Nate doesn't want to be seeing him but has to because he's being made to for various reasons

Farleigh makes a call to Oliver (again, twelve years since that summer at Saltburn)

In this version, Elspeth gives Oliver the estate and passes 10 years after that summer, so Oliver's been dancing naked and fucked up on coke and unprocessed grief and misplaced triumph for 2 years already.

Farleigh, knowing fully that both Nate and Oliver are unhinged and that Nate is probably just as capable of murder as Oliver is if pushed to it, knows this will go badly.

Either Oliver will take care of his Nate problem, or Nate will take care of his Oliver problem. Either way it's a win for Farleigh.

Except Oliver chooses the Secret Third Option and seduces Cal Jacobs (Nate's Dad) which for Farleigh is the nightmare scenario.

The worst part is that he has to act like he didn't orchestrate this situation.

Nate, furious in one of his sessions: - and this GUY who keeps HANGING AROUND MY FUCKING HOUSE keeps calling me FELIX even though I've fucking TOLD HIM NOT TO!

Farleigh, who knows exactly why Oliver Quick is calling him Felix and can't tell Nate why, and is also In His Own Personal Hell: Yeah That Sucks I Wonder Why He Does That, That's So Weird.

Oliver, because he's a little freak of a man who's still obsessed with Felix Catton and the Catton family has even more misplaced triumph because he's twisted it around in his head so he now has this idea that he's symbolically conquered all of Felix's immediate family (Cal taking the place of James who managed to "escape" him)

not sure what happens in the middle, but I do believe Maddy could take Oliver in a fight, and I also think she should be the one to kill him.

I think she and Farleigh are bros (in the way that you can be buddies with certain teachers) and he reassures her and helps her cover it up and get away with it.

thanks i hate it here 👍(<- said by me, my girlfriend, and probably farleigh too)

[some-lonely-loser]

STAY HIGH .02

📍Location- Martinez Household

📷POV- Narrator (1st)

After the party, I didn’t really remember much of anything. I’m not shocked though, I got so drunk that Ashtray guy offered to walk me home. Surprisingly enough, I made it home by myself and into my bed before my parents noticed how late I arrived. What I did remember was that weird girl. What was her name? Jennifer? Julie? Oh, It was Jules. Yeah no doubt, she was weird. I mean, she cut herself in front of everyone AND scared Nate Jacobs. I never seen anyone do that, but I guess that’s what new people are for.

Sienna sure thought it was weird too. But hey, maybe she’ll be cool. I ended up laying in bed for about 9 more minutes, scrolling on whatever apps peaked my interest before I got up and started getting ready for school

I had just gotten out of the shower before of course, Sienna called me. I waited for the call to connect and before I could speak Sienna screamed and my hearing almost blew.

“GUESS WHO THE FUCK JUST TEXTED ME AND ASKED ABOUT YOU”

My mind had raced through a million names before I stopped and realized, she could be joking. She usually pranks me like this but I decided to feed into her little scheme.

“Who?”

I mumbled with the most monotone voice I could utter out of me.

“Ashtrayyyy”

I stopped my movements and stared at the camera only to find she was already staring at it, smirking at me.

“You’re such a liar Sienna, and not a good one either”

She rolled her eyes before quickly responding.

“I’m not lying, i’ll send you a screenshot.”

Not long after she said that, I felt my phone vibrate and saw her display name reveal itself at the top of my phone. I clicked on the photo she sent me.

“Told you I wasn’t lying. Did he text you?” I snapped out of my

“No, he didn't text me. What did he want my number for?” I questioned

I knew Sienna wouldn’t know why he wanted my number but I just had to ask. Plus, I was really just thinking to myself out loud. And just as I guessed, she says she doesn’t know

“Maybe he has like.. A secret admirer crush on you?”

That was a ridiculous statement. I mean, Ashtray? Out of the whole school, that he doesn’t attend, he has a crush on me? Yeah, no chance.

“Girl..” I mumbled, rolling my eyes. “I’ll see you at school, I have to finish getting ready, Do I still gotta pick you up?” I questioned, Sienna often needs a ride to school, whether it be she just doesn’t want to drive or her car is broken.

“Nah, I think I’m gonna walk. Get some fresh air before having to deal with this school and it’s bullshit.” She chuckled.

We said our goodbyes before I hung up the phone and started getting dressed, and soon after I was in the car driving to school.

I was busy putting my books inside of my locker before I heard a voice that sounded like Sienna.

“So, I texted Ashtray” She spoke with excitement. I turned around and almost slapped her

“You WHAT?!” I yelled, gaining attention of most of the people near me, who gave me a little bit of a dirty look, but that didn’t matter

Sienna burst out laughing, hunching over and holding her stomach. “You should’ve.. seen your face!” She breathed out, looking at me with a couple of tears rolling down her face.

I crossed my arms and looked at her with a blank face, but after a few seconds of her looking at me with a smile, it wasn’t long before I started laughing too.

Our laughing quickly faded away as I heard the voice of Nate Jacobs, and saw him coming near us, staring at me with a creepy smirk on his face

WC: 664

Yall… hear me out😰 Ik I haven’t posted on here in some time but😔 It’s been 8 months since PT 1 so i’ll do better🙏🏽 Ik it’s mad short but 😭

[bluecheeseinmyoffwhites]

AM I TRIPPING CAUSE WHY DOES HE LOOK EXACTLY LIKE HENRY

[beausling]

posers watching countdown when it comes out : “omg it’s soldier boy and nate jacobs’ dad!!!”

us real ones : “DEAN WINCHESTER AND MARK SLOAN !!!!!!!!!😸😸”

[just-repost]

[midnight-sally]

Rue Bennett, Euphoria, Season 1 Episode 7 "The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Pee While Depressed"

[noodle-the-queen]

so i finally started watching euphoria (even though i already knew the general plot) and um. sorry i am physically unable to care about the rest of the show, the characters, the story, literally ANYTHING bc they decided to show us the actual saddest fucking backstory for Nate’s dad. how the fuck am i supposed to continue watching this show when there was a 100 times better plot about two best friends who are also very clearly in love in the 80s (?). BUT NO, i have to watch the version of this story where they don’t end up together and one of them ends up in a loveless marriage and subsequently becomes a terrible father/person AND im supposed to care about his shitty son and his insane friends who only care about who’s fucking who?! GIVE ME THE YEARNING 80’S GAYS YOU FUCKING COWARDS UGH

disclaimer: obviously obviously obviously i know that like. the show is supposed to be realistic and it’s way more realistic for Cal to have left Derek for his pregnant gf and whatever. but like. you CANNOT OPEN AN EPISODE LIKE THAT AND THEN EXPECT ME TO CARE ABOUT FUCKIN. CASSIE AND NATE ughHHHHHHHH

although along with that euphoria has some (from what i can tell as a mostly cis person) pretty good trans rep and lesbian rep. and yk aside from all the slightly unnecessary porn scenes its actually really well written and in my experience is a really good and accurate rep of what high schools are like rn.

this was NOT supposed to be this long of a post but i had a lot of feelings so here we are. also also i really hope we get a third season but it does make me really sad that we might not ever get closure on the Lexi/Fez storyline (which i absolutely loved) due to Angus Cloud's passing. ig that all depends on if they choose to recast him tho.

ANYWAYS YEAH euphoria huh

[euphoriashots]

Euphoria - Fezco, Lexi, Ashtray & Cal

[blueribbonbaby]

Angus cloud ❤️

[bigboyedits]

Nate was hard, his father had grown obese and nate couldn’t help himself now, before it was easy to hold back, but now that his father had grown into Nate’s type and wore the tightest clothes from before all his growth nate just had to have him, hard as a rock he fed his father fatter and fatter, eventually having his way and fulfilling every one of his desires, feeder nate and feedee dad.