#NOTHING IN THE WORLD BELONGS TO ME BUT MY LOVE MINE ALL MINE

[doctrined]

⠀ &͟&͟.

⠀⠀ LUCID DREAMS ⁎ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀ 恋徒 ⠀ ֵ

“𝑅𝑈𝐿𝐸𝑆 𝐻𝐴𝐷 𝐴𝐿𝑊𝐴𝑌𝑆 𝐵𝐸𝐸𝑁 𝑆𝐼𝑀𝑃𝐿𝐸 𝐼𝑁 𝐻𝐼𝑆 𝑊𝑂𝑅𝐿𝐷. THAT IS.. until she came along and turned his world upside.” —- salem’s knight, a night of lucid dreams.

&. LUCID DREAMS: MEDIEVAL AU

• MDNI (Minors Do Not Interact)

• TW: Unrequited Love, Angst, Dark Themes, Hate-Love Trope, Drama, Emotional Manipulation, Self-Doubt, Violence, Heartbreak

• FIC INFO:

• Setting: Medieval Era AU, featuring a Princess and her loyal, yet conflicted knight.

• Themes: The complex, tormented relationship between Caleb (the knight) and the princess MC. Love and hatred intertwine as they struggle against their desires, promises unkept, and duty’s unyielding grip.

• Genre: Angst, Drama, Romance (with a slow-burn love-hate dynamic), Dark Fantasy

tags; @alevres @icedoatlatte29 @starlitfool @rcvcgers @puckpuckvt @jadeloverxd @spacenott @marina27826 @starkdarya @darkx143

VERSE O1. pagans surely bleed, and the sky bows in worship. surely the humans too.. can see the chaos in a mind numbed to pain. surely, a man such as him—-divine in utter power, seething with raw possession—could understand that I was the pagan. a ritual left undone, a prayer uttered halfway, a woman in dire need of his acceptance. but see, flowers wilt, the seas rage, and i, standing at the shore, watched his dark eyes swallow me whole. my lips burned while his remained untouched, my fingers ached whilst he only drew further and further away from me. so I ask myself—-do I rage? do I rage for the stars? or for the man who refuses to come to terms with the revelation of us?” —- CALAMITY, a princess on the run.

I. “ I FUCKING BLED. and so did he, that I was certain of. ”

CHAPTER ONE

Ravenous thunder latched on in mere desperation to cling to the raging source of the downpour. As far as desperation went, I believe we all had a moment in life. A rarity where you must beat all odds for a miracle, for a hope that clung to life. Was your desperation clinging to something more meaningful? A new country? Love? Or maybe… an adventure? I don’t know what you struggled for, I don’t know the… desperation your heart hides nor the pain you swallow at the tight clench of your jaw and the sweep of your gaze tucking away an anguish one cannot decipher. But this was mine. I ran to chase away my misery. It came in the sweet, forbidden coveting of a man who just failed… to see me. It’s pathetic, the lies we chase, the demons we hide under our beds. The skeletons in the closets are worst, but dare I say, catching my breath as thunder poured its wrath onto me, slowing my steps. My legs ached, my chest constricted, and my tears, not a single soul could see, streamed down my cheeks with rain drowning them in fresh rainwater. But I pushed until my eyes caught sight of his carriage. It was obsidian black with a king’s symbolic sword displayed on the back. Everyone knew who it belonged to, no one needed a reminder, because that was him. The man, the myth.

“CALEB!” Was that my voice? Unrecognizable, torn and seeping with sadness, it broke through the rain. I don’t know how he heard me, much less the carriage rider, but it stopped, so did my heart when he stepped out. Relief was instant, but so was regret, anger, hatred because how dare he leave me behind? How dare he pretend I was nothing but a mere soul who’d meant nothing, who was of no value? Yet, as the distance ceased, and I pushed until my vision blurred, at the last drag of my breath, a grunt sounded by my ear. Arms caught me first thing before I crushed against his taut chest. Still solid, strong, and warm. My desperation was the sling of my arms winding around his neck, a choked sob wrecking past my lips. Just as words of hatred eased past my lips, his thudding heart uttered what his lips failed.

“I hate you.”

“I know.”

“If you knew, then why must you do this to me? Do you find it amusing? Is my misery…” And I cried, for the first time, pathetically, miserably because I was desperate for him, desperate for his love. Even as he crushed me into him, holding me so tightly as if I might vanish before his eyes. I’d like to believe promises meant something to people. Promises, of course, brought hope and at the same time, held the power to mend the broken. So, I thought the one I loved would always stand by my side and love me, truly love me the way that I had surrendered my soul to him. I was wrong, so wrong. I thought I meant something to him just because I willingly allowed my soul to tether, and to bind my heart to his. I loved him, loved him until my lungs ached and burned for his lips to cease that burn in the pit of my belly. Instead, my lover left me stranded. Affairs were the worst, cheating lovers, and liars, nay? But mine chose duty over me, and I watched him, helplessly untangle my arms from around his neck. Not a word had formed on his tongue, yet heat, the one betraying ache of insanity, remained infused, glaring at me, telling me to believe, to know he felt the same.

Did he feel the same, though? Did you, Caleb?

Instead, violet eyes bore into mine with a hardening gaze, soft as a puppy’s, and pleaded. Pleaded for what? My mind raced, the clatter of my teeth chattered as cold seeped in, dread followed, and I shook my head, staggering a step back.

“S—so that’s it? You’re not even going to acknowledge our feelings? What we both feel?” My voice sounded foreign to my own ears, making me cringe, but did it matter when my heart was being slaughtered, torn mercilessly? And there was nothing but silence from him.

Complete and utter silence.

“Caleb—”

“Don’t.” He cut in sharply, his voice rough and thick with emotions, betraying his usually controlled demeanor. It broke me.

Still remember my earlier words? About desperation. Well, this was the grave I dug with my own two hands, without mercy. It was ruthless, the way he watched me, stepping back, willing me to return to the castle. What cruel fate, no—what a cruel lie I’d fed myself, thinking I was strong enough to love him, thinking the first words forming on his tongue would be of love. Nay, I watched him turn, get back in the carriage, the relentless rain never once ceasing, even as it soaked us both. It never stopped for me. How much hope had garnered in this heart of mine? Ached for his love, aching to be the one to fill those cold, distant eyes with a mischievous glint.

Everything hurt. My lungs burned with thirst to quench a hunger I no longer understood, my hands trembled, but worst of all, I remained where I was, rooted, watching as the sky took sudden pity. It slowed its rage, and light flecks of drops grazed my cheeks where tears numbed, no longer streamed. Yet, was it a lie? Because at the jutting of my chin, lifting to the sky, a fresh pool of them gathered at my eyes, and I wept with laughter, empty inside. I stood there, abandoned, watching his carriage disappear into the misty horizon. My heart ached with the heavy weight of abandonment, but there was something else too—something darker. He hadn’t even tried to look back.

I lingered in the rain, feeling each droplet fall upon me like another weight added to my already fragile heart. With every beat, I could almost hear his silence.

[qomrades]

*thinks about jayvik* ALEXA PLAY 'MY LOVE MINE ALL MINE' BY MITSKI

[grievingmoon]

“i was thinking about how i don’t actually have anything of my own that i can keep. i very luckily have some material things, but every material thing goes away eventually. they can get lost, broken, stolen or just deteriorate, including my body. once i die this will all become nothing. and i was thinking about what do i have that’s really actually mine? that can’t be taken away? and i know this is corny but this love that i feel in me, that i’ve created in me, that i’ve built in me, held on to—it’s mine for as long as i want it, for as long as i don’t give it up or let the world take it away from me. and i really do believe that to love is the best thing i ever did in my life. better than any song i've ever written, any achievement by far. to love is truly the best and most beautiful thing i ever did. and then as i was thinking about that, i started thinking about how sad it was that once i die, i couldn’t leave behind this most beautiful thing that i have. i guess it sort of dies with me. so i wanted to write a song about how i wish that when i die i could at least leave all this love behind in the world.”

mitski explains her new song “my love mine all mine”

[aurascoral]

treat me like an angel༏ྀ ❤︎ ❀ ⠀‧͙⁺˚* ･*˚⁺‧͙

그리고 여전히, 넌 다 괜찮아.

[sunriseinorbit]

i think it's actually so important that yusuke *doesn't* get to show the real sayuri to the rest of the world. not because he doesn't want his mother to be recognized for her work (and it is a tragedy that she doesn't get that recognition even in death) but because her love for him is now his and his alone.

both yusuke and his mother spent years having their art stolen from them and put on display for the rest of the world to see without any input over how it was presented or perceived. the sayuri itself was meant to be a gift for yusuke, but when madarame stole it, he edited it precisely to strengthen its appeal to the public. it was no longer her painting, both in the sense that madarame passed it off as his own and that its meaning and emotional core were lost because of that. it became a subject of the world's attention when it was likely never meant to be, at least not in the way it was after madarame's bastardization.

and the real sayuri can't get the world's attention. yusuke can't display it in a museum or give it the widespread, mainstream attention it deserves, because the public is still fixated on madarame's copy.

but conversely, that also means that no one can take it—both the painting itself and what it represents—away from him. he doesn't have to share it with anyone, except for the people he loves, on his own terms. (when he leaves it with sojiro, he says that his mother would have done the same. he keeps her love alive by passing it on.) after so much of his artwork, which we know is incredibly personal and the primary way he expresses himself, was made public without his consent, it's both heartwarming and powerful that he gets to keep the physical representation of his mother's legacy and their relationship all to himself.

[cherrybeetle]

Mitski was right when she said that if there is one thing in the world that is completely and utterly yours it is love. it is YOUR love. It belongs to YOU. And if you can pour it out into the darkness just for the sake of loving, then you can pour it into yourself, too.

[nico-theniner]

Mitski my love mine all mine thanzag edit

[rddykilowatt]

I did not agree upon Jean Moreau’s fanon anthem being a FUCKING MITSKI SONG AND OF ALL OF THEM ‘MY LOVE MINE ALL MINE’?!?!! TSC DEMOLISHED ME ONCE I CANNOT HAVE MY HEART STOMPED ON AGAIN

[megala-theia-praxidike]

SnowBaird I found romantic in the Book Part 4

Him feeling so worried, embarrassed and guilty

Matching roses 🥰

Him: MINE MINE MINE!! Get back you savages, she's mine!l

Sweet only if

Like war torn lovers😭

What kind of person who only thinks of someone as an object would think of them constantly, knows what they like and wants to give them the best especially when they had close to nothing.

Yes, definitely one of the many proofs of his lack of empathy /s

😒

Part 3

Part 5

[stsghrs]

it should be illegal to make satosugu edits to mitski's songs with song of achilles quotes

[reggieblk]

My love Mine All Mine by Mitski is the most Tomarry coded song in recent history

Moon, tell me if I could Send up my heart to you? So, when I die, which I must do Could it shine down here with you? 'Cause my love is mine, all mine I love mine, mine, mine Nothing in the world belongs to me But my love is mine, all mine, all mine

like, HUH?? is that not Tom Riddle speaking??

My baby, here on earth Showed me what my heart was worth

you're lying if you think Tom Riddle didn't write this specifically about the love of his life Harry James Potter

[ahotknife]

My baby here on earth Showed me what my heart was worth So, when it comes to be my turn Could you shine it down here for her?

[pe4rl-diver]

i cant explain it but

this part

with this song.

[luffythinker]

your anons are cowards for not talking about BKDK enough/jk

in the first half before they even started dating Deku is very infatuated with Bakugo but when they are dating he's not as crazy, i don't mean like he isn't crazy in love i mean before dating he's super nervous about a lot of things but the longer they date and get to know each other romantically the less like uppercase letters he becomes and after dating for at least 2 years he's chill you know what i mean? Bakugo is a little the same way he doesn't know things he can and can't do sometimes he wants to make a move but he wont in respect for Deku. After the apology he wants to stop calling him Deku but it's his cute nickname and he has a whole ass conversation with him even though Deku said it was ok he still felt the need to approach this in a safe environment "I know you said it was ok but i don't like calling you Deku anymore, but i can't stop myself so im using round face's meaning when i say it. they have this conversation while snuggled up together before they sleep. Bakugo affectionately calls him Deku, still calls him nerd, just a little less shit-stain and ass-wipe and stuff like that. i saw a tiktok where it was like after Bakugo apologized he had to come up with nicer ways to bully Deku (cause he is going to bully him for life, there is no changing this) he like just comes in his room and closes his laptop and turns out the light on his way out leaving the door half closed and not closed all the way and Deku is like "WHY?" lmao love that other anon's kiss scene after they fight all might in the exams, other kisses for me include, after they fight nines, when recover girl is healing Bakugo's purple arms he waits until she leaves so he can kiss Deku. This one is hungry and passionate. After they do that thing where the building collapsed and Deku helped Bakugo out (when he used him as a cane) in the changing room when they are changing out of their costumes he kisses him a thank you but doesn't say it cause this kiss is enough. when they were working at the endeavor agency they literally have their own rooms you know they will be making out in one or the others room a lot. they kiss in the dorms early in the morning or before they go to bed. Bakugo is destin to cook with whoever his partner is so he loves cooking with Deku and he is going to kiss his cheek regardless if someone is looking or not he doesnt give a damn. They kissed in the war when his body moved on it's own if there is a possible way to fit one in there when Deku left the group and Bakugo followed him. Bakugo had a bad feeling and kissed him cause he felt like something bad was going to happen and it did. they kissed when he apologized don't tell me they didn't, when Deku fell into his arms they kissed i saw it. Bakugo kissed Deku when he was in the hospital bed before the vigilante ark when Deku wasn't conscious. Deku could be the one initiating some of these kisses but it's usually Bakugo cause he wants to show his love and that's all he knows to do. We already talked about their love languages and i love talking about them being in love.

I'm so glad this is the last ask of the night, we're ending today in such a sweet way 🥹

I wholeheartedly agree with you in the beginning, I think the word we're looking for is comfortable. Izuku is crazy and paranoid over katsuki because a lot of things about their dynamic before are uncomfortable (of course, he always had admiration as well, but it's obvious he wasn't really comfortable with bakugo). Their first year or so of friendship and then daring is then trying to find their footing in a new dynamic, how to be themselves and build something good for both of them. But years into the relationship tho? izuku is comfortable he can be crazy and nerdy sometimes (especially if new kacchan merch drops) but overall he loves his boyfriend and he loves who he is with him, I think they would eventually reach a peaceful pacing on the relationship where there's no need for the "fear" of messing up in fron of the other.

Now, this is not to say they don't play or are little shits with each other, like you said, katsuki would have to find ways to bully him that are not actually bad bad, but he would not stop cause it's their essence. I think izuku would be the same, he's used to this and he plays along and sometimes even say something back and that catches bakugo by surprise and everyone around says they're really spending too much time together (not enough time in their opinion lol)

I dont think I have something new to say about the kisses because I agree with you so so so much 🥺 izuku is always a little shy in public but bakugo will always kiss him regardless because that's his damn boyfriend and if he wants to kiss him, he will! they almost died (it happened several times), he will not waste any opportunities!!

i love talking about them with all my heart, they make me really happy, thank you for bringing them up 🥺🥺

[sunscall]

no one could ever replace mac as dennis' domestic partner btw, at least not permanently. dennis tried to replace him a few times with maureen and mandy but that didn't work and he always comes back to mac. even if it never turns romantic, it will always be mac. if u even Care