#NOT EVERYTHING THAY JUST HAPPENED
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I JUST FINISHED SUITOR ARMOR I HATE THIS I HATE THIS GOD WHY
#I WAS EXPECTING LUCIA BEING FORCED TO FLEE#NOT EVERYTHING THAY JUST HAPPENED#FUCK#this series is so good ;sobs;#suitor armor#;sobbing;#sggsjsjdbe#i cant
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As cute as that post is, the hc i live behind is that Bruce has been surrounded by rich people all his life and is so aware of the kind of nasty shit they do that hes like hyperaware of protecting his kids in the Right way, and that means being extremely blunt and nonchalant about sexual things they may or may not do. Hes the dad thats constantly reminding them to use condoms or buy this kind of lube for these kinds of toys and the kids HATE ITTTTT theyre like PLEASE OLD MAN. ENOUGH. I GET IT !!!!
Hes like got a million answers for everything bc HE did so much shit in his lifetime that hes a walking encyclopedia but they would literally Die before coming up to him for any sex related questions. Which is really unfortunate (for them) bc at least TWO of his children are dating aliens and old enough to Do Things and its impossible to just google [insert alien race] anatomy; the only people who have that information are the aliens in question and BRUCE bc hes the only fucker that keeps track of this shit !!! Going to Bruce for anything is soooo dire bc the reminder that he FUCKS is like too much for them to bear, esp when hes out patrolling w Selina or Clark and hes like smiling and bickering w them its like NOOOO THATS RIGHT NOT THEM TOO āoh my fucking goddd not uncle clarkā <- jason about to literally explode from how red his fucking face is
#chattin#suggestive#bruce#DONT know where im going w this#just that i hc bruce as someone who had very limited avenues for pleasure while doing his whole batman schtick#and so he indulged in very extreme ways and had to trial and error his way into finding something that worked for him#so kink circles have always been his best friend#and like he KNOWWWWWWWS this life is so fucking tough and stressful and theres like no way u get a bunch of teens and young adults#and people in general in the same place constantly without having them fool around its like the same shit thay happens in the olympics LOL#so hes like well its GOING to happen and i know this bc alfred tried to stop Me and that was. unsuccessful š§āāļø#so hes just loops back into being supportive so that they dont compromise themselves#and its the WORSTTTT for his boys bc bruce just fucking Knows when things are happening#and when theyre behaving like bruce in his early years#or gravitating to the same circles (jason) that he used to frequent#and its SO funny bc bruce is just so deadpan and dry about everything INCLUDING this#hes just an awkward dad making sure his kids are okay š„ŗ he did the atupid experimental shit so they dont have to !!!!!#but what that also means is that hes in ur business way more than you want him to be#yes i am . in relations w [insert alien teammate]#no i do not need to read up on the . anatomical books you found of them in your travels.#(tim specifically) NO you do not need to ask CLARK for- WHY WOULD U ASK HIMMMM BEFORE READING THE BOOKS- DONT ANSWER THAT
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worlds most atrocious awful yaoi
calling them fools gold cause they're both trying to trick eachother for their own gain (fools gold is "fake" gold. pyrite btw) but also because they're both fucking idiots . they are the fools
#my vision is like. s2 dale doesnt remember fairy world but he has a feeling SOMETHING is up and this peri guy might be the key that#ties everything together#and peri is like. ok cool no godkid anymore im totally chill with that (lying) and tries to still play a role in devs life and make it#better by targeting the source of his issues. dale#tldr dales trying to trick peri into revealing whatever and peri's trying to make dale even give a single microscopic shit about his own son#both of them fail btw#and then the evil yaoi happens#just doodles#fop#fools gold#peri fairywinkle cosma#dale dimmadome#fairly oddparents#fop a new wish#uuhhhhhhhhhh yeah thays all the tags
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Starting to think fast track release is an intentional tactic shows use when they know the end of their story makes no sense and just want to move on.
#what a baffling finale#nothing made any sense or connected back to any of the themes or dangling narrative threads#what was the point of sun disappearing#what happened to them not agreeing about how they wanted to live and needing to work through that#why were we time skipping over everything interesting just to have all their challenges magically solved#at least we got more gay marriage and adoption propaganda i guess#caged again the series#thai bl#shan shouts into the void
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(Alt text under read more)
I think "one or more of them is in danger or almost fucking dies, in the process discovering their child's impurity, and then after a lot of emotional turmoil they just pass the fuck out the second they're safe and calm again thanks to the awful, exhausting day they've had" is a scenario I write weirdly often for this messy as hell family
Anyway. Family cuddles. My babygirl is exhausted and deserves to be held for once
ID start: A black and white doodle of the Pale King, White Lady, and Pure Vessel from Hollow Knight as humans. The three of them are covered in bruises and scratches. They're sleeping in a pile of blankets with the Pure Vessel tucked in between their parents, with only their face showing. The Pale King is hugging them with both sets of his arms, his face buried in their hair, while the White Lady lays beside them with her arm drapped over the both of them and roots coiling around them. End ID.
#faaf au#spooky arts#pale king#white lady#pure vessel#half assing the tags#while i do adore my usual messy and long story of their relationship evolving with time and forging a familial bond through blood and tears#after everything that happened and all the wrong theyve done. i still enjoy putting them in situations thay force them to either communicate#or show that they care for and love their child and vice versa. essentially resolving 8 years of plot in like. a week tops#thats only half a joke they legitimately skip over like 5-6 years of miscommunication. further hurt and resentment#theres still lots lf family therapy theyre gonna need but theyre starting it on a better note than the classic faaf#also flower coming to terms with the fact theyve been abused WHILE in contact with their parents and the two getting first row seats to that#and just how much their kid will bend backwards to come up with any excuses for what theyve done to them is fun
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i feel like horror would have sourdough starter. he doesn't even use it to bake he just keeps it alive like a funny little experiment. the yeast in that starter will never get to experience the fulfillment of becoming bread unfortunately
and then he totally gets mad at dust and killer if they dont take care of it properly when he can't. WDYM THE STARTER OVERFLOWED!!! YOURE SUPPOSED TO ADD LESS WATER!!!! that's his baby guys he named it and decorated the jar and EVERYTHING š
#would this be considered torture if sourdough starter is alive#dust is also into the little yeast experiment but he doesn't wanna get yelled @ by horror (he dont feel like dealing with that)#he wants to know what would happen if lead were dumped into the starter. good thing horror doesnt bake with this#so he just gets killer to do all of the care for the starter when horror cant#plausible deniability and all that. at least killer's the one that gets yelled at instead of him!#horror probably does have a seperate jar of starter he keeps seperate for baking#if dust and killer find it he'll make them all match skulls#I FUCKING HATE MAGMA WHY IS THAY STUOID ASS WEBSITE SO CONFUSING#HOW DO.PEOPLE USE IT OH MY GOOOOOF THIS SUCKS BALLS BIG HAIRY BALLS#IK GONNA SCRATCH MY SKIN UNTIL IT BLEED LET ME DRAW!!! YOU FUCK!!! THE BRUSH PRESSURE IS SO SHIT#WHY IS IT NOT PICKING UO WHEN I DRAW I HATE THIS#anyways. this is horror cooking propaganda idc if he'd be ass at it#man. this sucks. i dont like magma. please let me use ibispaint layout and everything. ibispaint save me ibispaint save me#siiiigh. okay. time to post this. people who see this will definitely see this guys.#me on my way to send a post off the populate the murder time trio tag daily#tricule hc#killer sans#dust sans#horror sans#murder time trio#utmv#sans au#nothing serious right now because i really dont feel up to it#guys if you liked this post like and subscribe for more. listen i give tou an mtt playlist what else do you eant fron me#i do as much as i can while balancing my office job and college education (i say. unemployed and in high school)
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Mav is gone. I have a thousand things I want to say but I don't have the bandwidth to write a proper post right now.
Send me asks so I can tell Mav's stories. I want to talk about him and remember all the funny and good stuff.
#about mav#tw pet death#he was the coolest dog in the world#i am so lucky that i got to plan his last days#he was truly happy right up until the end#i got to plan his last adventures and walks and meals and kisses and i got to tell him everything i wanted to tell him#and im so lucky for thay#but i dont feel very lucky#i just feel so cheated#i shouldve gotten ten more years#he only turned five last week#it isnt fair it isnt fair it isnt fucking fair#so send me asks so i can tell you the good stuff#you can ask anything and if its too personal i just wont answer#pinning thins so you dont have to scroll through a thousand asks to figure out whats happening
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being autistic in fandom spaces is like really miserable because iiiiiii miss social cues a lot. and text cues i either miss frequently or interpret differently than intended. which makes me analyze characters different and need things explained of what was like. Actually meant. but sometimes people are assholes and that always sticks with me a lot more than anybody calmly explainging it to me ever will
#it's not something that's super often but it's gotten worse since rejoining danganronpa and i feel so upset#tw vent#but like its happened more often like 3 and ive only been back in here since like july guys.#and ive thought abt these instances for months.#im beinf talked down to because of a fictional character bc my disability makes me inept isnt thay insane?#isnt that insane how people think that its fine to do that? to be incredibly mean spirited over this?#and i get complaining damn it i complain all tje time but it. makes me feel like theres something inherently Wrong with me#i cant understand like everyone else and need some things explained to me#which must mean i have no place here right#this is wjy im so scared to share my works because somehow everything i do is a carnal evil for. whatever reason.#gahh just . maybe if people were nicer but thay wont happen i know that#i feel childish for beinf so uspet im 22 and cant handle how the internet is but.#fandom is my safe space#im being othered in a place i want to feel safe.#it makesme wanna fall off the grid and just leave it all alone amd enjoy in private#and id still see stuff so im not going to do thag since itd be the same scenario just now im talking to me exclusively#but ah it makes me really wanna just Leave . sucks 2 suck i guess#i dont know. ive jus been thinking this for a few months now and ughhh i so g lnow im sick and spilling my guts#micetalk#not tagging my organizational bc i fear this might start something and ugh i dont want that
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To people who don't know what happened :
Basically another chat got leaked between what seems to be Build and someone else , where he's seen asking for money multiple times , and cursing people who exposed his old problematic tweets on twitter , being homophobic (as a joke š) and other things among many.
As any sane person would think , i also had doubts about the authenticity of the texts and all , but then everyone basically unfollowed him on Instagram and build also tweeted an apology.
Apology confirms that those are genuine right??
He genuinely badmouthed his costars who were there working their asses off for a show that got cancelled once and had to begin production again.
Like , he does not seem like a good coworker , all things considered. And he's so much trouble to the company as a whole , which has pretty ungrateful fans following it's artists.
(idk some tweets just make me go , it's a tough industry . They're atleast still getting work from a show that's been done airing for a year and with no hope of season 2 . They can't create work , but they're still doing very well for a smallass company)
I initially read his fans' responses which were along the lines of "if your texts with your bestie leaks then will you be safe?"
And although that's a very .... Erm ... creative way to view things , I don't think that's barely enough here.
He was badmouthing basically apo , jeff and barcode, and nodt and mile(?) I'm unclear on the details. I get that you may be angry at your coworkers , there may be squabbles but that's not what this was about?? Jeffbarcode were accused of being boc's favourites (??????) and had more pictures taken than everyone else(??????????????) They had like 15 mins of screentime. What is this man on about?
I just straight up don't trust this man anymore.
I don't care about his story. He's so much trouble than he's worth and every day there's something up with him.
#i don't even know what i should tag this as#don't fight me#I'm honestly not posting this as a call for action against anyone#just these things have been on my mind especially seeing some twitter peeps complaining about how less barcode has schedules compared to#this or that artist and it's like - that boy's in his first year of uni . he might be busy . his parents may have requested lesser scedules#he has a drama lined up for release what even are you talking about . am i crazy or this is getting way more toxic than ever?#i don't know and i may not know enough about everything that's happening but for goodness sake I don't care . don't want to#especially about build and his drama i guess some people do good for them i just like being aware and not caring because he just doesn't#seem like he's learnt anything at all and seems like a not good person ya know#i don't wish anyone any hate please don't hate under this too i just wanted to rant and organise my thoughts kinda#thai boys love series#thai drama#drama. huh.#kinnporche the series#mileapo#jeffbarcode#barcode tinnasit#build jakapan
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Assorted thoughts on falling in love
No one ever told me it would be terrifying.
I am very good at finding (or more often inventing) reasons why I shouldn't love him; I do this so that I can have an excuse to run from vulnerability. Mostly this just means I love him anyway, but feel deeply and anxiously conflicted about it.
I hate how undignified this feels. Turns out I have formed at least some of my identity around appearing untouchable and in control. I feel at odds with myself because I can't pretend that being around him makes me less happy than it does; I smile involuntarily when I hear his voice and I can't stop.
It is horrible to me that other people can see the kind of person I have chosen and thus perceive me in a way I can't control. This makes me want to control him, so that I can project the image I want to project. I hate this about myself; it is deeply, deeply unfair to him.
Sitting beside him is maybe the most peaceful place in the entire world.
#in the sermon on sunday the pastor talked about how sometimes we can desire wisdom because we want the control#of knowing what's going to happen and what the right decision is all the time#instead of acknowldging rhat human wisdom is limited and we have to trust God#anyway that hit home in ways very relevant to this#i am so terrified to make the wrong decisions and so terrified by the fact thay i cant actually know perfectly and thus control everything#and i am so terrified on so many ways by the idea of loving him#im so terrified by the fact that i dont know if where my life is going is compatable with where his life is going (because i cant know#because neither of us knows where our lives ate going!)#and im so scared caring about him is somehow going to make me care about God less#and im so afraid to want something because just the wanting feels like idolatry#and at the same time i dont even know what i want!#and also yes i AM overthinking this 4 month relationship hilariously thank you for asking!
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Thanks to tiktok i learned a new word for like how right now I have no idea if my stomach feels weird bc Iām hungry, getting period cramps early, am getting sick, or am full. That itās having a poor sense of interoception.
#prolly isnāt the last one but idk maybe I drank a lot of tea and didnāt notice#Iāve annoyed my mom growing up when Iāve been like my stomach my hurts and she tries to figure out why to know what mihjt hell#my leading theory is sick bc i was sniffley#Orr hungry#but Iāve like cycled through thinking everything is likely#personal#ya know maybe this is why sometimes Iāll realize Iām the evening that I havenāt eaten yet#usually that happens when I have plans#kinda wondering if I sometimes convince myself feeling hungry is just feeling like my stomach is in knots from anxiety about plans#tho def sometimes just am distracted but w family plans I think it might be thay
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#what am i doing#i have everything I've asked for#the bed isn't empty. It's so full its bursting#i have so much love and affection#...so why isn't it enough#why am i running away from it why can't i let it happen why am i so terrified to ask for it despite wanting it more badly than i want air#ive been so focused on making sure everyone feels included#on making sure everyone is having fun and is okwy and taken care of#and im.... im being looked after too in kind#....i think#.....all i want is to be *held* held#To be wrapped up in someone's arms so tightly#more than one#So fully i cant move or run away#.........and if I'd only ask I'd have it#......ive been played with a little#I tbink.....#.....so why was it when someone said thay another girl was 'the only one who hasn't been played with'#my own mind went '....when do i get to...?'#......am i being greedy and selfish to want more than what I've gotten...?.#.....fuck i don't know#.....I should just sleep
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AGH.
#Thinking about Sara Lynn :((#and also Abigail#i love you teen girls who deserves better u are loved#THEY MAKE ME FEEL SICK#makes me want to cry a little#I love them so much I wanted them to live. to be able to heal be the best version of themselves#but inevitably the adults in their life just fucking failed them#I fucking hate you Bojack Horseman (but i also see how the adults in his own life failed him) he continued the cycle and it lead to-#-Sara Lynn's death#just at the moment in her life when she was trying to stay clean and finish her studies#SHE WON HER FUCKING EMMY ANS SHE WASNT THERE TO RECEIVE IT AND SEE THE FRUITS OF HER WORK#She died. She died without knowing about it. She died next to the person who she still trusted after everything that happened to her#and Bojack failed her.#and god I know Abigail wasnt a saint#but i look at her and for a moment i wonder of this could have been avoided#i wonder if she could've been saved from the disaster that is Hannibal's and Will's relationship#i wonder if she could've been saved from Hannibal.#he was the one she trusted the most. she never saw Will in the same light. she feared him even if Hannibal tried to make thay fear go away#AND SHE ALSO DIED FOR THEIR SINS#she wasnt a saint but she was a lamb who got sacrificed for the horrifying love that grows in those two#and god#Hannibal killed her. sliced her neck the same way her own fathered had threatened to kill her in#sheepy rambles#txt
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fuck this country.
#rant incoming#the senate just passed a bill to block the student loan forgiveness plan.#im fucking tired of this bullshit#yes lets punish people who want to get a higher education so that they can get a āwell paying jobā#that āwell paying jobā will barely be enough to make a damn living#god forbid you wsnt to get a higher education#youll be stuck in 20k debt that has high as fuck interest and will be damn near impossible to pay off#fuck America#fuck the government#fuck everything#pisses me off so fucking much#rant#OH LETS NOT FORGET THAT THE PEOPLE WHO HAVE LOW INCOME GO GET A HIGHER EDUCATION SO THAY THEY CAN GET OUT OF BEING LOW INCOME AND NOW THE#i should add#that the Supreme Court has the final decision and thats either going to come later this month#or in July#so lets all hope that they dont deny the plan#it still sucks that this is happening
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sry i also started thinking abt how great my life would be if i was trapped in a timeloop again. i meant again as in i thought abt it again not as in I was trapped in a timeloop and id love 4 it 2 happen again. never been in one unfortunately.
#id be so awesome in the timeloop dude. you guys dont get ittt id slay in the timeloop#id memorize every single thing that happens nad itd be awesome id write a book abt everything that happens even. and id be able to sleep so#much and therd be no consequences for anything (aside from. what. me being stuck in the timeloop longer? DONT MIND IF I DO!!!)#and like if itsba 24 hour timeloop. dude i can do anything in those 24 hours. i could go across the world PROBABLY#like i could just empty allll of my savings and book a same day no stops flight . and then id just like be somewhere else. ajd i wouldnt#even have to worry abt getting back bc timeloop my guy!!!#sighh .. yk. every day alreadh feels all the same due to depression so mayyybe everyday feeling the same due to timeloop wouldnt actually b#awesome but i think it would be avtually bc the reason every day feeling the same feels Bad is bc i know they shouldnt.ik theyre different#im justgoing through the motions every day and i hate it. if every day actually was the same ? dudeee i wouldnt be sad abt every day#feeling rhe same bc it straighr up would be. i wouldnt feel like im missing out on something... And idbe able to DO different things bc i#wouldnt have to worry like Omg what will happen tmrw if i do something reckless today.. omg i cant spend this money bc rent is due next#week. omg i cant go do thus activity bc i have 2 work today.. Brother nobody has to work in a timeloop!!!#and all id have to do is like. kill somebody every so often so the time god or whateber doesnt think ive learned my lesson. and itd suck to#kill someone yk id feel badd. ig rly i could just rob a bank and not have 2 kill someone#well yk. some ppl. i would murder. mainly bc i think itd be kiiinda funny. but i shant go into thay more#Dude i could literally learn every language and read every single bookkkkkk god i wanna be in a timeloop so bad id thrive in the timeloop
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if i had a nickle for every time i was friends with someone and their desire for an idealized version of me got in the way of or ruined or friendship i would have...... um....... uh.....
#i never miss dating my exes. i DO miss being friends before we dated. am i aromantic or just traumatized or maybe even a combo of the 2#i think i am arospec but i have to be honest w myself on how trauma has influenced thay#guy whos had 0 good sex and only 1 okay relationship#bc i keep choosing loserrrrss and having terrible self respect and being bad w boundaries#im getting better tho!!#even tho i did have one recent fucked up situationship develop out of my poor boundaries it drove me to get better at them we r getting ther#we r growing we r learning its okay. *thru gritted teeth*#talkin#i know i sound like such a broken record talking abt this but it happens to me a lot n ive been trying to get better at making sure it stops#not that i can control how people treat me forever ofc i cant.#but i CAN have better boundaries n self worth n stand up for myself n not let ppl treat me like that#i CAN stop giving in on my boundaries and be firmer on them#i will not continue to be used like this i just wont#2025. we r gna get better. not like turn everything around and fix it at once. more like how we grow every year evn whn we dnt notice it.
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